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richardcampbellgansey-iii · 19 days

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And you never knew how much I really liked you

Seoksoo/SeokminxJisoo

The first song Joshua wrote was when he was eleven. It wasn’t good. It sucked, actually. But at least, he wrote a song. It was written in English, his first language. Korean was his second language. It was more a poetry than a song, and it talked about an elf who, after a curse, went to the witch who cursed him to break the malediction, but ended up falling in love with her. Joshua was mama’s boy, so she encouraged him to keep writing. And he did it. Now he was a songwriter, who wrote songs for a trio.

The trio was formed by Boo Seungkwan, Lee Seokmin and Kwon Soonyoung. But he wrote in Korean, because none of them could understand English.

BooSeokSoon. And they were famous. So famous they filled stadiums. And he was backstage, writing, but he was okay with that. He never was such an extroverted person, who liked being on a stage in front of a crowd. His twin brother, however, was. In fact, he was a musician, too. Jeonghan opened BooSeokSoon’s concerts every time, playing his acoustic guitar and singing his self written songs. He was talented, maybe more talented than Joshua, and there had always been competition in their family. But Joshua loved Jeonghan and Jeonghan loved Joshua, so that competition lasted for a very short period of time.

He wrote his second song at fifteen. It talked about his family. About his dad, who abandoned them, one day. About their rage. That was a good song. When Mr. Hong went away, and left them, Jeonghan was pure rage. He was only ten, but he started to smash his toys against the wall, he started to shout and yell. Joshua, instead, was silent. He cried every night in his bed, hugging his pillow.

- Be angry, Joshua. Fuck! Scream, rage. - Jeonghan said, at fifteen.

- Don’t swear.

- I swear when, where and how I want. I want you to be angry. I want you to let off steam.

- I can’t, okay? I can’t.

- Why?

- I don’t know. I’m blocked. There’s something that keeps me here, while you go on. There’s something that keeps my mind back to that day.

- Then let it go.

Joshua couldn’t let it go. He had never been able to let it go, to forgive his father. Jeonghan didn’t forget what he did, either, but at least he let all that pain go away with all the rage he had in his little body.

His last song, the one he was writing, was about love. It was rare, Joshua never wrote about love. He always wrote about pain, and guilt, and grief. But now, he was writing a love song. He was writing with his sketchbook and his pen (he preferred the old style), with a soft light, until he heard the door opening.

- For God’s Sake, it’s four a.m. What are you doing awake?

- I’m writing.

- Joshua, you know I agree with your creative flair. But you need to sleep.

- It’s called business.

- What are you writing, anyway? - Jihoon, his producer, approached him with a curious look.

- A song.

- No shit.

- What do you want me to tell you?

- What kind of song, for example.

- A love song.

Jihoon was the typical cynical person who didn’t really like love songs. He preferred something heartbreaking, something sad or even angry. But what Joshua was writing was, actually, sad and heartbreaking. But it talked about love, anyway. A never started love, two people who never said what they felt to each other.

The kind of love that flew between him and Seokmin.

Joshua met Seokmin when Jihoon introduced them to each other, with Seungkwan and Soonyoung. And immediately, Joshua fell desperately in love with him. With his bright smile and his joyful eyes, and he knew for sure his love was reciprocated. Why? Because nobody ever looked at him like Seokmin did. Seokmin’s happy eyes looked at him with admiration, not only for the songs he wrote for them, but for… What else? Lots of things.

He knew that because Jeonghan told him. And Jihoon too. And Seungkwan. And Soonyoung. Lee Seokmin was in love with him and he was in love with Lee Seokmin, but none of them had the guts to tell that to each other.

Jihoon looked at him, frowning. - And what does this love song say?

- Read.

Joshua was one of few words.

When you cycled by

Here began all my dreams

The saddest thing I've ever seen

And you never knew

How much I really liked you

Because I never even told you

Oh, and I meant to

Jihoon read, his frown always present on his face. Then he looked at Joshua, who just raised his eyebrows. - Don’t like it?

- No, I mean. These are the best lyrics you’ve ever written. But you know Seokmin is gonna read it, right?

- And?

- And, what?

- And, what do I care about?

- I’m glad you don’t care that you won’t be our songwriter anymore.

- Why?

- Oh for god’s sake, Joshua Hong. How could you be so oblivious?

- Oblivious?

- Stop asking fucking questions.

- I don’t understand you, Jihoon. Genuinely.

- The fact that I have to explain this to you makes me mad. - Jihoon read the song again, louder. - And you never knew how much I really liked you. What is this, a fucking declaration of love to Seokmin or what?

- It is not. - It was.

Jihoon raised his eyebrows, letting the sheet go.

- Even if it was– Why wouldn’t I be your songwriter anymore?

- Because you two would fight. Or, worse, fall in love.

Joshua tried not to blush at that option. Fall in love? That was a dream. Joshua had never fallen in love with anybody. He had never had a relationship or something like that. While he watched his brother being in love with Choi Seungcheol for years, he was alone. But he wasn’t ready. He was okay with that. He had never been a romantic kind of person. He never wanted to commit, and even if he liked Seokmin, he liked him so much, at the point he even thought he loved him, he wasn’t sure he wanted a relationship. Because he was used to being alone.

- We won’t fall in love. And we won’t fight.

- Who said that?

- Me.

- Very reliable.

- Who told you we will?

- My instinct. And facts.

- Which facts?

- The fact that you two are in love with each other. And either you fight or fall in love.

Joshua stopped to think for a moment. - And what problem would there be if we fell in love?

- I think you’re smart enough to understand it.

- Maybe I’m not.

Jihoon took a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose with the index finger and thumb. - Joshua, you’re our songwriter. And Seokmin is our lead singer. Now, if the two parts fall in love with each other, it is a mess. Because if you, one day, write some songs Seokmin doesn’t like, and doesn’t want to sing, for personal reasons, and you two fight, for me it would be difficult to mediate. Seokmin is our pearl. Of course Seungkwan and Soonyoung are, too, but Seokmin decides. He’s the frontman.

- But who told you I want to be with Seokmin? Who told you my wishes? Why are you taking for granted what I want?

Jihoon was speechless. And Joshua was satisfied.

- Joshua, I didn’t mean to take your wishes for granted. I just supposed. And then… Well, if you won’t fall in love, you will fight. Because you won’t be with him and he will.

- Why do you have to be so mathematical? Every time, you have to calculate anything. Life is not like that. We’re humans, not numbers.

- Joshua, you’re not going to let the others see that song. Period.

Joshua widened his eyes, jumping off his seat. - What?! But… But that’s the best song I’ve ever written!

- I don’t care. Do you want to ruin your career?

- You… I’m not going to ruin my career! It’s just a song! A fucking song, I…

- Don't raise your voice to your superior.

- I do whatever the fuck I want! You can’t do this to me!

- Oh, yeah? - Jihoon said, looking at Joshua. He was a few centimeters shorter than him, so he had to look at him from the bottom up. - You’re fired.

Joshua’s heart broke in a million little pieces. He felt betrayed. By a friend. Yes, he was his superior, but Jihoon was, first of all, a friend. - What… Fired?

- Yes. Fired. You’re out. And this? - he took the sheet from the table and smashed it against Joshua’s chest. - You can do this whatever you want. It’s not my problem anymore.

Joshua smashed the door of the apartment he shared with his brother.

- What’s this fucking racket?

He didn’t say anything. He just entered the kitchen with the shopping bags and left them on the table, puffing. Jeonghan left his room, looking at him. - What the fuck? Not even a “Hello”, or a “I’m fucking back, you fucking asshole”?

- Shut up, shut up.

- Hey, watch your fucking mouth.

- Me? You’re swearing like a butcher, and I have to watch my mouth?

- Swearing is my only personality trait. Why are you so mad, by the way?

- I’m fired.

Jeonghan raised his eyebrows. - You’re what?

- I’m fired, Jeonghan.

- Why the fuck are you fired? You were doing so well!

- Because I wrote a love song and Jihoon didn’t agree with that.

- I don’t believe you.

- Okay. - Joshua took a deep breath. - That song was about me and Seokmin. And he didn’t take that well.

- What? What kind of problem does he have? Let me read that.

- No.

- Why not?

- Because you’ll tell me the exact same things.

- I’m not an asshole, Shua. And I can’t fire you.

- That’s for sure. Can we have dinner first? I’m dying from hunger.

They didn’t really talk during dinner. Or, Jeonghan talked, while Joshua didn’t.

- So Seungcheol told me Minghao and Junhui kissed last week. They kissed! - he stopped to eat a bite of scrambled eggs. - Those two… They’re so different. Yet so good together.

- Mh.

- You don’t care, am I right?

- Mh.

- Are you even listening to me?

- Mh.

Jeonghan pressed his lips together, rolling his eyes. - I’m homophobe.

- Mh.

- I’m a prostitute.

- Mh.

- I’m a fucking serial killer and I’m ready to smash your fucking face against the wall.

- Mhmh.

Jeonghan smashed the plate against the wall. Just then, Joshua raised his head, looking at him astonished. - What. The fuck.

- Oh, finally!

- Are you out of your mind?

- Joshua, I don’t know what to do anymore! Are you depressed or something?

- What?

- Fucking react!

- To what?

- Why are you so… Apathetic? - Jeonghan seemed to be on the verge of crying. - You’ve always been. Always! Since we were little kids! Since dad… - he squeezed his punches together. - I just want you to react. To rage. To fucking be angry! Why are you so passionless?

Joshua didn’t know what to say. It hurt to see Jeonghan like that, but it didn’t hurt enough. It was his brother! It should've hurt so much more. Why was he like that? Even with Seokmin. The man he was supposed to love. Seokmin told him he was beautiful, once. And the only thing he did was shrugging and saying “Thanks”. Nothing more. So he did something. He stood up, went to Jeonghan and hugged him. Tight. So tight he could feel his brother’s heartbeat.

He hadn’t hugged Jeonghan for years. His twin brother startled at first, then burst to tears, hugging him back. - I love you, Jeonghan-ah. Sorry if I don’t say that often.

- Asshole.

Joshua loosened the embrace, wiping Jeonghan’s tears. Then, he searched for his song in his bag, and when he found it, he handed it to his brother.

- It’s stupid. I know. And it ruined my career, so…

- Shh. - Jeonghan said, reading. And when he finished, he slammed the sheet on the table. Joshua raised an eyebrow. - I know it’s not so good, but-

- I’m gonna kill Jihoon with my bare hands. This is fucking beautiful!

- Yeah?

- Yeah! It is! Why would this ruin your career?

- Because it’s dedicated to Seokmin.

- So what?

- That’s what I said.

- Let him read that.

- What?

- Are you deaf? Let him read that.

Joshua shook his head. - I can’t.

- Why? It’s beautiful. It’s well written. It’s heartfelt.

- Jeonghan-ah, I just can’t. What if he rejects me? Or, worse, what if he’s in love with me, too?

- That’s fucking beautiful, then! Tell me what you fear.

- I’m afraid of commitment. Of love, and everything. You know, how do you do when you’re with Cheol?

- I’m just myself. And I love him. Like you love Seokmin.

- But, I don’t know how to be myself. I’m a shit when I’m myself. I can’t show my feelings. I can’t express them. What if I hurt him?

Jeonghan smiled, taking Joshua’s hand. - You’ve got a big heart, Shua. You just can’t see it.

- I don’t know anything about love. What can I do about it?

- Nothing. I do not know anything about love either. But, you know what? I don’t care. I just go with the flow. I just let things happen. And everything shines like the sun.

I would rather not go

Back to the old house

I would rather not go

Back to the old house

There's too many bad memories

Too many memories there

When you cycled by

Here began all my dreams

The saddest thing I've ever seen

And you never knew

How much I really liked you

Because I never even told you

Oh, and I meant to

Are you still there or have you moved away?

Or have you moved away?

I would love to go

Back to the old house

But I never will

I never will

On the ledge of the building where Lee Seokmin lived, the two boys were sitting cross-legged. Seokmin stopped to read the sheet that Joshua gave him, concentrated and almost in a state of trance. Then he turned to look at Joshua, who was smoking a cigarette. Joshua had a problem with cigarettes. He smoked a lot. He smoked the entire pack in a day, and Seokmin disapproved of that habit, but didn’t say anything.

- This is… This is beautiful.

- I’ve been fired.

Seokmin showed a shocked face: - What… How? Why?

- Because of that song.

- But that’s the most beautiful song you’ve ever written!

- It’s about us, Seok. - Joshua said.

- About… Us?

- Yes.

Seokmin looked so happy at that moment that Joshua was scared. Scared he could deceive him. The talk he had with Jeonghan could have made him change his mind about his absolute dissent regarding love, but he wasn’t really sure yet. What if he hurt him? He immediately regretted having made him read the song.

- So you like me?

- I do, yes. I do like you, Seokmin.

Now, Seokmin looked even happier. A big smile was painted on his lips, and his cheeks were red as cherries. But Joshua wasn’t smiling. He let out a deep breath, his eyes dropped. Seokmin noticed that. - Oh… I’m so sorry you’ve been fired for this.

- No, Seok, I’m not sad about that. I mean, it’s not difficult to find a job as a songwriter these days. Of course I’ll miss you, Kwan and Soonyoung, but… Just because I like you, it doesn’t mean we… - he couldn’t finish the sentence. And Seokmin’s smile dropped immediately.

- Oh.

- Yeah.

- But… That song…

- I know. I’m sorry.

Seokmin’s eyes were full of tears he was trying to hold back.

“I knew it. I hurt him. I broke his heart. Stupid, stupid Joshua who has to sabotage himself every time.”

- I’m so sorry, Seok.

- It’s okay, Hyung. - Seokmin smiled, as always. - Can I hug you?

- Of course.

And then they hugged.

#seoksoo #joshuahong #hongjisoo #joshua #seokmin #dk #dokyeom #seventeen #svt #jeonghan #yoonjeonghan #leeseokmin #svtfanfiction

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seventeenplug · 2 years

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Lee seokmin x Reader Drive

Pairing: Lee seokmin (dk) X AFAB reader

Summary: Seokmin had been practicing for the tour when all of the members were given a week to relax and he chose to rent a beach house and go spend the week with you.

Word count:2k

Warnings:mature content

Content: mature, smut, driving, oral (m/receiving)

Mature! Minors DNI

With your hand on his knees the two of you sang to your hearts content along the song that played, a random spotify playlist of the many you had made, the sound of YoungK's voice playing through the speakers.

It was all going well with the trip, he had just finished the promotions for "Hot" and was preparing for his "Be the sun tour" when he told you that he had been given a week of rest before returning for the preparations for the world tour, and upon telling you he scheduled for a house near the beach for you two to get away for the week without the members.

Car loaded, nice weather, full tank, the future smell of the ocean and a handful of board games to keep yourselves occupied for the week whilst away, nothing could go wrong...that is, unless you're talking about Seok Min's driving.

"Let me drive" you said, he had just let the car's motor died, mid driving holding up the cars behind you.

"I want to drive" he argued, shaking his head as his hands tightened around the steering wheel. You huff, crossing your arms over your chest.

"Fine. Then, I want to help you" you smiled innocently, he looked at you curiously.

"How so?" he questioned, head once again turning to look a you for a second as your smile turned into a smirk and he raised a questioning eyebrow as he felt your hand slowly creep your creep, down his stomach and onto his leg.

His body tenses, the move had made him speechless and he was caught off guard by it, nevertheless he liked it, he began to crave the touch, no matter how small or big.

"Maybe, I could help in a different type of driving?"You suggested, hand inching closer and closed to his clothed member, laying still in his inner thigh.

Seok Min's breath hitched, before he relaxed, deep breaths to calm himself down as he could feel how badly you affected him, how hard it was for him to not react to your touches, but nothing worked, especially now that he could feel your soft breath near him.

Eyes focused on the road, he tried his best to not think about the closeness of you two, your lips finally coming in contact with his cheek, in a soft, almost feather-like kiss.

He exhales shakingly, fighting for dear life as his grip on the steering wheel had already turned his knuckles white from the force-

"Y/N" he says, softly, his fighting to not close in pure need, you hum.

"What baby, what do you need?" you ask, a whisper in his ear before you bite his earlobe and move to his neck. He could feel your smirk against his skin.

He sighed in content, your face kissing his neck as the sound of the radio played distantly, though he could recognize the weeknd's voice along your whine, nose nudging his neck.

He panted, his neck turning so you would have more access to it, you continued on your attacks, whines leaving his beautiful lips, his eyes almost closing as you reach his favorite place behind his ear.

"Please" He breathed out, a tone of almost begging.

"Eyes on the road baby" you mumbled, your face pulling away from his neck as your hand once more caresses his body, and you place it on top of the very visible boner.

"Use your words darling" you smirked once more. You knew you were, by now, pushing your luck, acting like you like him to treat you, He liked it, he liked to put you putty in his hands and now you had the upper hand in it, until you didn't... because just a few seconds after, the car came to an all stop and you stopped all actions.

"What's wro-?" Before you could finish, he grabs you by the jaw forcefully pulling your face close to his and aggressively kisses you, lips madly moving against eachother as both of you let out moans, your hands moving from his pants to the back of his head, gripping his hair to which he groans, the other grabbing at his white shirt.

You tried deepening the kiss, hand gripping his hair tighter, a moan passing from his lips to yours, his own hair roaming your body, grabbing at every curve and asset, before settling on your leg. grip tight and almost pulling it over his lap.

Both of you almost forgot that you were simply stuck in a red light, that now was green.

The sound of honking broke you two apart, both panting as you tried to catch your breaths, you whine annoyed as he focuses back on driving to the beach house. But you were mad,glaring at him from the side, a pout on your lips as you leaned back into his neck.

"Baby" you whined.

"I know - but we're almost there. I promise"

"I can't wait that long" you fake cry throwing your head back for a second, his hand on your knee.

You huff placing your face back into his neck, inhaling his sweet scent. His perfume filling all your senses.

"Fuck. Baby, we can't just stop in the middle of the highway" he hisses, trying his best to focus on the road ahead of the two whilst accelerating.

"I know... but-" you start, stopping mid sentence with a smirk. You quiet down as an idea crosses your mind and with a final kiss to his neck you lift your hand lacing your fingers within his hair pushing it back.

Your boyfriend, confused gives you a questioning look as he watches the sparkle in your eyes.

"Why are you smjling like that? What are you planning?" He asked warily, you shrug.

"I'm going to make you feel, so good, Minnie" you laugh pecking the side of his lips as to not interfere with his sight of the traffic.

Your free hand reaches over the seats, moving down his chest and laying on his pants, you could feel his prominent bulge and you put pressure in it, he bites his lips as you begin to palm it through his pants, your other hand unbottoning his pants as you continue to kiss at his neck.

"I'm driving" he says through his teeth trying to dissuade your naughty ideas.

"Just keep your hands on the wheel for me, don't worry" You whisper, skillful hands lowering his his pants just enough for you to grab onto his boxers, and with a whine of discontempt due to him not moving he sighs, moving slightly so you could grab onto his boxers and pull them down enough to bring his member out.

Pre cum already pooling at the tip, you use the pad of your thumb to smear it around, a small moan leaving Seok Min's mouth as you worked on getting him fully turned on, squeezing around it and bopping your hand, and with a final kiss under his ear you lean forward, bringing your face down and kiss his slit, looking at him for a split second through your eyelashes before you take him in your mouth, hollowing your cheeks just like he liked.

He loudly moans, one of his hands leaving the steering wheel to grip at your hair, keeping it away from your face as you begin to bop your head on his hardened member, his hand begins to push you further down.

Your gag reflex acts on it, as your nose reaches his pubic bone, you could feel all of him in your mouth, especially as he began to fuck your throat, hitting the back of your throat as your lips tighten around him and he begins to loudly moan, the mirrors and windows beginning to fog due to the hot air.

His hand's grip on you loosens, and you pull of with a pop, almost gasping for air, he continues to slowly thrust inside your mouth, but it stops when you use both of your hands to push him back into his seat, sitting back slightly yourself.

"Wh---why did you stop?" he pants confused.

"Beg for it" you smirk, once more playing him at his own game.

"Y/N" he warnes, eyes glaring daggers at you, but you simply shrug once again, settling back in your seat with a smirk, watching the amount of emotions cross through his eyes as he debates his next moves.

"Fuck, ok. ok, Please" he rushes.

"Please what, darling?" you insist on the teasing and he huffs looking out the window before looking down at his lap with a sigh.

"Please, make me cum" he swallowed dryly, jaw clenched as he continued staring straight ahead at the road.

You laugh accomplished, hand back on his base as you continue to suck the top, the sound of his pleasure booming through the car once more as you fasten your movements, cuss words flying out of his parted lips.

"Fuck! Fuck, just like that" he almost implored, hips once more bucking into your mouth, his hand again at your head, keeping you still as he hurried his movements. You tried to look up, although the position impossibilitated it and instead just focused on your reflexes.

The fogged windows and your eyes tearing, a single tear falling from your eyes and down your cheek, likely dragging your mascara with it as he continued on wrecking your throat as his orgasm rapidly approached.

Your own fingers played with yourself through the white panties now on show as you pushed your dress up your hips.

"Fuck, baby. Why did you hide it" He panted, hand trying to reach into your side to pleasure you, his head knocked against the headrest once he realized he was too far to reach it, and how unsafe it would be to reach over to help you in the speed he was going in.

"God, I'm so close, Y/N" he continued, once more losing control over his grip and you took over, sucking harder as your hand moved faster under, and within seconds a string of cusswords left Seok Min's mouth as he shot hot strings of hot and salty cum into your mouth, you swallowed, your mouth still on his members as the movement of his hips slowly came to a stop.

His hips finally stilled, his hand releasing your hair, and he thought you would now stop, you had what you wanted, but you didn't stop. Your mouth continued on the movement overwhelming him as he tried to catch his breath.

He cries out in pleasure, hand tightning on the wheel as he tried to get you off, the feeling so good it almost burned and in just a few minutes he came once again.

You finally pulled away satisfied, wiping the cum off your chin with your finger and sucking it as he watched you silently.

"Gosh, fuck. You're gonna regret that one. Fuck" he continued his silent cussing as he exhaled deeply still trying to gain his control back.

"I'll be waiting on that" you laughed amused, you kissed the side of his lips once more, helping him button his pants back, finally opening the windows to get the fog out and let the warm, yet cool air inside the hot atmosphere that was now your car.

"I want to help you so bad, baby" he groaned as you put your dress back down, you hummed, inching close to his seat and opening your legs for him.

His hand immediately reaching over, a sigh of content falling from his lips as he began to tease your clothed clit. You moaned lightly, rubbing yourself against his fingers so he could feel all of you.

"Who made you so fucking wet baby. i haven't even touched you" he teased you.

"Only for you, Minnie" you whined as he continued his torture of not moving his hand and making you work yourself on his palm.

"We're home" he whispered in your eyes, snapping you out of your transe, eyes opening to look around. You kiss his lips, breaking apart just as fast as you reached to kiss him, both of your hurriedly taking off your seatbealts and leaving the car.

He was by your side almost immediately lifting you up briday style and carrying you inside the small yet cozy beach house.

"Make me regret what I did" you whispered into his ear, a chuckle echoed through the empty house. And safe to say, the week had been the most athletic you had ever been in your life.

Published the 30th October 2022