#Lauren... hm. Thinking about it the *answer* is absolutely right for her

[outoftheirdifferences]

What shatters you?

exhaustion.

you have tried to be Atlas for far too long. your legs tremble and shoulders creak beneath the weight of the world you carry. every step forward is a battle, yet you soldier on... for what? when will you learn that you are allowed to lower your heavy burdens?

betrayal.

you are so tired of giving your trust away, only to have it thrown back in your face... your heart has been broken, again and again, by those you've mistakenly believed in. "perhaps this time will be different", you say. my dear, it won't. your heart is too gullible for the cruel world around you

Tagged by: @talesofourworlds​

Tagging: Whoever wants to!

[letsgivethisonemoreshot]

BruiserMates

Word Count: 4,644 (it's a long one)

Warnings: Sexual Situations, banter, there's some fluff in there somewhere.

Summary: The British Bruiserweight is more grumpy than usual. But his friends and a co-worker think they just might know a way to fix it. (Also, I tried to make an attempt to keep true with accents for the first time. So I apologize if it's horrible!)

The lukewarm water rushed out of a shower head in the back of the arena. The water pressure in these showers were never that good, but it was early and Lauren had the whole locker room to herself. She had the curtain drawn for privacy, just in case anyone else arrived early. Mostly because she was in the men’s showers. And just as she was rinsing the shampoo out of her hair, she heard several voices from the locker room echo into the bathroom.

"You could've stopped to get breakfast first." A British accent rang out.

"They 'ad food at the hotel." The familiar accent of Pete filled the room.

"Not anything for a vegan. And ya know that." Another voice argued.

"I don't know every damn vegan place in tha country." Pete spat back.

"Uh guys, just so you know you're not alone in here." Lauren informed them.

"Who in the bloody hell is that?"

"Lauren. I'm a backstage interviewer here. I really needed a shower after my workout before I got ready to work and they were cleaning in the women's locker room when I got there. No one was in here so I ran in. I'll be quick." She explained.

"Pete?"

"Yeah, she works here." He vouched, recognizing her voice.

"Ah. Alright then love. As long as you work here. I'm Tyler by the way."

"Trent." The other voice rang out.

"You guys are here from NXT UK for the tag tournament, right?" Lauren asked.

"You got it love." Trent answered as he turned on a shower on the opposite side of where Lauren was. "And you don't 'av to rush. We don't mind if you don't."

"As long as you stay on that side of the curtain." Lauren responded in a joking but friendly way.

"Great." Pete murmured.

"What's wrong with you?" Trent asked him.

"He's still sore about his girlfriend messin' around on him." Tyler answered getting ready to get a shower himself.

"Tell my business to the whole locker room, why don't ya." Pete said annoyed.

"She's the only otha one in here. And she sees ya more than us. I'm sure she's noticed you're grumpy."

"No more than usual." Lauren said as she conditioned her hair.

"Aw piss off all of ya."

"See? He's always this pleasant."

"I thought you said you were gonna be quick." Pete pointed out.

"I was, until Trent was nice enough to tell me I didn't have to. So now I'm taking my time."

Pete let out an aggravated grunt. "I can't shower with 'er in here."

"Relax Pete, I'm almost done. What brings you guys in here so early anyway?"

"Time change. Kind of has us messed up. And Pete just doesn't sleep." Tyler replied. "What about you? And working out nonetheless. I’d think you’d moreso be off writing questions."

"How else am I supposed to fit myself into those tiny dresses they want me to wear?" Lauren partially joked, causing two of the englishmen to chuckle. "I have a few interviews I have to do for some social media shows before the actual show tonight. This was the only time I could fit in a work out. I was going to shower real quick then get to work, but the women’s bathroom was closed, so I that brought me here. I guess it’s just bad timing.”

"Ah, I wouldn't say that love." Trent said.

"Well maybe not on my part. Anybody could walk in here. So many people have probably had fantasies that start like this. But apparently, it’s bad timing for some of you.”

"Would any of those fantasies include any of us by any chance?" Trent asked in a joking tone.

“Trent, ya can’t just ask a woman ya just met something like that.” Tyler chastised.

“Why not? I’m just joking.”

"Hm, some just might." Lauren answered.

"For fucks sake…"

"Jesus Pete calm down, I'm done. I'll be out of your hair in a minute." Lauren said as she turned off the water and wrapped her towel around herself.

"Yeah relax mate. We're just messin' around." Trent said to his friend.

"You need to get laid." Lauren stated.

"Excuse me?" Pete asked, sounding offended.

"We've been telling him that the last two weeks love." Tyler said to her.

She pulled open the curtain and stepped out of the shower stall. "Take it from someone who pushed away a lot of her friends by being a negative mope after going through a rough breakup. If she's gonna fuck around, then so can you. Try smiling, go get laid, and live. See ya later boys. I believe I'll be the one interviewing you later!" Lauren called out before walking away.

Lauren left them alone in the men's locker room and walked back to the women's which was thankfully now able to be occupied. She walked quicker than she planned seeing as how she couldn't get dressed there with the guys there. So she was running around in just a towel. No one had really showed up to get ready yet, but she still had to go over interview questions, get dressed, and was expected by the stylists soon. She was rummaging through her bag when there was a lock at the door. She dropped what was in her hands and curiously walked over to the door. Upon opening it she saw an annoyed Pete Dunne standing there. He was still in his trousers, nice button down shirt, and vest. His hair pulled back. Obviously he still hadn't gotten into the shower yet.

"To what do I owe the pleasure of a visit from you? Miss me already?"

Pete held out a plastic bag with tiny bottles inside. "Ya left your crap in the shower."

"And you're such a gentleman you brought it back to me?" Lauren joked.

"I drew the short straw."

"You sure it doesn't have anything to do with what I said?" She asked as she took the plastic bag from him. “Because my fantasies about you usually start with me still dressed and you ripping my clothes off me, but if this is how it happens I’ll take it.”

“No, it’s because I was the only one who was still dre…wait, what?”

Lauren smiled "Thanks for bringing my stuff back Pete. I forgot it in all the conversation. And if you’re just here to drop it off, I really need to finish getting ready. I need to be in make-up soon. I’ll see you around later.”

She closed the door, leaving Pete standing there dumbfounded at the interaction he just had.

Lauren had gotten dressed and was sitting in the make-up chair. She had decided on a short black off the shoulder dress. Even though the shoulders were bare, the dress had long sleeves, making a bit more acceptable in the workplace. The strappy heels that she had on also made it a bit less casual. She already had her hair done. She chose to leave it down since it was only shoulder length, but add some waves to it. Pete had wandered over to the area as Lauren was laughing while the make-up artist applied the dusty pink lipstick. Lauren was deep in conversation with the artist. She got along with everyone. Well, mostly everyone. She was easy to talk to and calming, which was a plus with her job. The interviews always flowed nicely and never seemed forced. She never really had any real problems with anyone she worked with. Pete leaned against a wall off to the side watching her talk. He had his wrestling gear on now, and had his long hair dangling down over half of his face.

"Alright, all set. How's it look?" The make-up artist asked as she held up a mirror.

"It looks great! Thanks Rachel!"

"Awesome. If you need a touch up just let me know."

"I will. Thanks!"

Lauren checked in the mirror one last time, pursing her lips together, before jumping out of the make-up chair and leaving it for someone else. She walked away from the styling area and right passed where Pete was brooding.

"Lauren."

"Hey Pete." Lauren replied as she walked by.

"Hey, hold up."

"What's up?" She asked as she stopped and turned to him.

"You tell me." Pete stated.

"Is this about what I said earlier? I’m sorry for getting involved in your business. And I never would have said anything had we not already been in the middle of a conversation. But I’ve been there, and I didn’t want you to end up pushing your friends away with your bad attitude like I did.” She explained.

"Not that. After. At the locker room." Pete said in a much lower voice.

Lauren smiled and crossed her arms. "What is this? When is Pete Dunne so timid?"

Pete rolled his eyes. "F'get it."

"No I'm sorry. I couldn't help myself." Lauren said reaching out to grab his arm. "I'll be good. What did you want?"

"You to stop being intimidating for a moment would be good."

"I've heard that once or twice before, but not from anyone like you."

"What you said earlier, did you mean it?" Pete asked changing the subject.

"That you need a good lay to forget about her? Absolutely. Your friends seemed to agree."

"No. That you've 'ad fantasies about me." He said as he took a step closer to her.

"Maybe a few times." She answered, surprising him by the serious tone in her voice. He stood there not quite sure how to follow up while Lauren opened the small bag she had with her and looked through it. "Listen, I really have to go and interview Daniel Bryan. But if you want to take my advice, I would love to be the girl that gets under you to get over her. Room 308 if you're interested."

She slipped her spare hotel key into his hand before turning around and continuing to walk down the hallway. Later on that night Pete sat in the back watching the show on a t.v. He was watching Lauren interview his two best friends while he spun the hotel key around in his fingers while being lost in thought. He pulled it together to go out and put on a good show, like he always did. All of his cockiness and aggression was on display. Lauren had been watching his match extra closely that night.

After the show Lauren was sitting alone in her hotel room. She hadn't made any plans for the night in case Pete decided to show up. After about an hour of waiting, she decided to change her clothes and get comfortable. She had the television on and was laying down in the bed, trying to relax, but she found herself not paying attention to it and trying to figure out what reasons Pete could have for not showing up. After driving herself crazy for some time, around 11:30 she realized she was being silly. His good friends whom he hadn't seen in months were in the country for a bit, so he was going to be spending time with them. Plus with all the joking around that she had done with him that day he probably didn't even think she was serious. Or maybe he just wasn’t interested and didn’t know how to tell her in a nice way. Lauren grabbed her phone and laid down on her bed to play some games until she got tired. Only a few minutes after she relaxed herself for the night, there was a knock at her door.

Lauren put her phone down and got out of bed. She walked over to the door curious of who could be there this time of night, especially without texting her first. She looked through the peephole and saw Pete standing on the other side. She quickly opened the door.

"You do realize I gave you a key so you wouldn't have to knock and wait in the hallway, right?"

"I didn't feel right usin' it." Pete told her.

Lauren opened the door wider and stepped aside inviting him in. He stood near her as she closed the door.

"I see you stayed dressed for me." Pete joked as he looked at her in her pink tank top and black yoga pants.

"I could say the same for you." Lauren retorted noticing Pete was in grey sweatpants and a t-shirt.

"It's not m' job to look pretty." Pete stated.

"Good thing I'm off the clock then."

They hadn't really talked much before now, other than just a hello or exchanging pleasantries. Maybe being involved in the same conversation as a group of people. Mostly that was because Pete kept to himself or only really talked with the people he was close to, where as Lauren would talk with everyone and insert herself into others conversations. But Pete definitely took notice today that not many people were able to throw back at him the way that she did, and he liked it.

"So did you just come here to criticize my clothes or…" Lauren trailed off.

"Actually, I wanted to talk." He answered.

"Oh, uh okay."

Lauren definitely hadn't been expecting that. She lead him into the room a little bit more and she sat down on the edge of the bed. Pete took one of the seats that were in the room and placed it in front of her before sitting down as well.

"So?"

"I've been thinking about what ya said. And you're right. If she's gonna bang a bunch of guys and not care, then I should too. Well, ya know."

"So what's the hold up?" Lauren asked.

"I don't want pity sex with someone just because they feel sorry fa' me. Especially if it's someone I 'av to work with."

"I can understand that. I'm not really one for random hook ups either." Lauren agreed.

"But then why did you…"

"I like you Pete." Lauren told him.

"Why? I'm kind of a bastard." Pete asked confused.

Lauren laughed. "Yeah, most of the time. I've watched you. You're grumpy face and your angry promos. But I've also seen the way you joke around with your friends. I've seen how interact with kids. I know how much you care about animals. There's a sweet guy behind that whole bruiserweight thing."

"What makes you so sure?"

"Your best friends. Those goofballs wouldn't waste their time with a complete asshole." Lauren answered with a smile. She reached out and placed her hand over top of his. "I'll be honest. I've had the hots for you since you started coming around. And then when I actually learned things about you I had a crush on you. And seeing you laugh with your friends, I've wondered what it would have been like if we had that kind of relationship."

Pete couldn't help but flash a genuine smile that he usually kept hidden. "Why didn't ya eva say anything?"

"You had a girlfriend, remember?"

"Right. Right. Forgot about that."

"Well that was the plan." Lauren giggled.

"So girls really dig the whole aggressive arse thing huh?" Pete asked amused.

"Oh yeah. There's something wired wrong in our brains. And the accent doesn't hurt either.”

Pete leaned back slightly in his chair and chuckled.

"Did I just make Pete Dunne laugh?" Pete didn't even try to hide it this time after she pointed it out. "Up until now I think I've only made you scowl."

"Yeah yeah, just don't spread it around."

"Don't wanna ruin your unlovable reputation, huh?"

They both sat in awkward silence for a few moments, neither knowing what to say next. Pete fidgeted in his chair slightly before standing up. Lauren promptly stood up along with him. He reached out and pulled her to him so her body was flushed with his, wrapping his arms around her in a bear hug. The act took her by surprise.

"Thanks." He said into her ear.

Lauren put her arms around her torso returning the hug. But her senses perked up. He was still holding her, his head down and his nose grazing her neck. The thought of his mouth that close to her, with his history of biting, sent an electric wave through her nerves. She tried to push those thoughts out of her head and hugged him tighter.

"Anytime Pete." She said lightly.

Pete broke the hug and stepped aside looking down at her smiling. She gave him a half hearted smile. She was glad that she was able to be there for him, and it seemed like there was a friendship forming between them. But she was a little disappointed that it wasn't going further. And embarrassed that she told him how she felt, and now she had to deal with him at work all the time with him knowing that. She didn't say anything as she followed him as he walked to the door.

"I'll see ya around, alright?" Pete said as he put his hand on the doorknob.

Lauren nodded with a smile. She closed the door behind him and leaned it against it sighing. She felt like an idiot. She was just hoping he wouldn't make a big deal about it at work. She began walking back to her bed. When she was a few steps away, she heard the door click. She turned around and saw the knob turning. It pushed open and Pete walked back inside.

"Hey. Everything okay?" She asked confused.

He slammed the door behind him and walked towards Lauren, throwing the room key onto the bed as he passed it. He made it to where she was and placed his bands on her hips and pushed her up against the wall crashing his lips down onto hers. Lauren put her hands up on his shoulders, bracing herself at his actions. He moved his hands from her hips up to her sides all while continuing kissing her neck. He traced along the top of her tank top before grabbing it with both hands and ripping it down the middle. Lauren gasped into his mouth. Pete didn't give her any time to adjust to what he was doing before his hands traveled back down her body and behind her thighs picking her up and pressing her against the wall. He tore his lips away from hers to slowly lick down her chest until stopping at her partially exposed breast. He lightly licked around her nipple a few times before taking it into his mouth. Lauren ran her fingers through Pete's hair, softly moaning. When he lightly bit down she moaned deeper and arched her back off of the wall. Pushing herself even further into him, she became even more aware that her legs were spread around him and she could feel herself getting wetter every time he nibbled.

Pete pulled her away from the wall and carried her over to the bed. Lauren laid on the bed looking up at him trying to catch her breath. He was looking down at her with his signature cocky smirk. He reached out and lightly grabbed the waistband of her pants before yanking them off and crawling on top of her. Pete nuzzled into her neck kiss and biting causing her to arch her hips up and feel the large bulge in his sweatpants. Lauren slid her hands under his shirt and scraped her fingers down his chest bringing a low growl from him.

"You are wearing entirely too many clothes." Lauren informed him.

Pete chuckled, but it wasn't the light hearted one from earlier, there was a deeper tone to it. There was something sexy in that chuckle. He leaned up onto his knees and peeled his shirt off.

Lauren took the moment to just look at him, kneeling in front of her with his hair hanging down partially in his face. Watching his eyes in the light. He could see her eyes glancing up and down his body.

"Is this what ya wanted?" He asked.

"Fuck yes." Lauren answered out loud, instead of in her head like she planned. "But this was supposed to be for you."

"Does it seem like I'm not enjoyin' it?"

"Well yeah, but what is it you want?" Lauren asked.

"Haven't been asked that in a long time. Honestly?" Lauren nodded. "I want someone to want to be with me. Not just use me ta get off and pass out. Someone who enjoys being with me. To feel loved."

Lauren leaned up so she was sitting up in bed facing him. "Really?"

"Yeah. Sounds stupid. I guess when ya with someone for so long those things kind of become lost."

"No Pete, they don't." Lauren said as she placed her hand on his face. "That's what happens when people stop caring."

The words hurt Pete, but deep down he knew she was right.

"Lay down." She told him.

"What?" He asked confused.

"Take your pants off and lay down. Let me take care of you." She said it in such a calming tone, you'd forget they were just dry humping each other.

He complied with what she asked. Lauren removed her underwear and straddled him. He rubbed his hands on her thighs She pulled off what was left of her shirt. Pete unknowingly bit his lower lip upon seeing her naked in front of him.

"Like what ya see?" She asked with a coy smirk

"Damn love."

"You sure you wanna do this?" She asked him.

"Love if you don't get on me right now I'm going to push you down and get back on top of you."

Lauren smiled and moved to slide herself down onto his dick. She gasped as she slid down. She could have guessed the size of it based on what he wore in the ring, but she didn't think it was as thick as it was. Pete hissed as she began riding him.

"Fuck babe. You're so tight." He commented.

"Yeah, it's been a while." She replied as she rolled her hips.

"You're so wet." He stated.

"I told you, I like you. Now are you gonna do commentary the whole time or just enjoy it?"

"Oh I'm enjoying it love." Pete said as his hands slid up her legs. He groaned as he saw her bouncing on him, her breasts bouncing along with her. He ran his hand along her body and brushed his finger onto her clit causing her to yelp. He liked the sound that she made and continued to rub along her clit as she rode him.

"Fuck Pete if you keep that up I'm not gonna last long." She warned him.

"You keep makin' those sounds I won't eithea."

Lauren pushed his hand out of the way and brought her upper body down so she could kiss him before moving to his neck. She began kissing and sucking on his neck like he had been doing to her earlier. Pete reached around with both hands to grab her ass. She was moving at a slow and steady pace, keeping with his grunts of pleasure. She would bite down on his neck every once in a while hoping to catch him off guard. He would squeeze his grip tighter pushing her at a different pace causing her to moan.

"Wait, Lauren stop." Pete said suddenly.

Lauren stopped and sat up. "What's wrong?"

"I wanna be on top." He told her.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah."

Lauren wanted to stay on top and take care of him, but it's what he said he wanted to she switched positions with him. She had to admit having Pete in between her legs staring her down was something she had thought about several times. He began placing kisses down her collar bone as she ran her fingers through his hair again.

"Mmmm Pete, please." Lauren begged bringing a smile to his lips.

"Please what?" Pete asked as he ran his length along her entrance, teasing her.

"I know I'm being selfish at the moment but please, I need you." She moaned as she tried to push herself closer to him.

"Baby, I love hearing you beg." He said as he entered her starting slow at first.

"Pete, faster please."

Pete grunted before speeding up, loving the feeling of her needing him, He began to thrust harder as he sped up. Lauren wrapped his leg up around his waist to give him better access.

"Oh God Pete, I'm so close." Lauren said as she scratched her nails down his back.

"Let go for me love." He rasped into her ear.

Lauren grabbed onto Pete's face to pull him into a passionate kiss as she came. Pete finished shortly after her before collapsing next to her. Their session was relatively quick, but emotional and intense. They laid next to each other trying to catch their breath.

"Well, that was unexpected." Pete stated.

"Yeah, definitely didn't think that was gonna happen when I woke up this morning." Lauren agreed as she laid next to him.

"I'm sorry it wasn't really what ya wanted." Pete apologize.

"What do you mean?"

"Ya said you wanted aggressive, and ripping clothes off, and all that."

Lauren leaned up on her elbow and turned to face him. "That's one of the things I've thought about, but I really just wanted you Pete."

He responded by lightly placing his hand on her head and pulling it down to rest on his chest. Lauren laid there cuddling on Pete, which is something she never would have expected from him, and soon found herself falling asleep.

Around three in the morning Lauren jerked awake. She didn't mean to fall asleep. She didn't even realize she was that worn out. Or maybe just comfortable. The room was now all dark, Pete must have turned the lights out. She couldn't see anything but she felt over to the other side of the bed and it was empty. Of course it was. He came for what she said she'd give him and then left. He wasn't looking for anything beyond that. Lauren knew that when she offered him to come to her too, but she didn't think it would hurt that much when he was gone. She laid back down in her beg and pulled the covers up feeling pretty stupid. Just then she heard the toilet in her bathroom flush and the door open. Pete walked out of the bathroom and back over to the bed.

"Pete?" Lauren asked.

"Hm." He replied.

"I thought you left."

"Why tha hell would I do that?" He asked as he pulled up the covers and got back into bed next to her.

"You were gone. I thought you got what you wanted and left. Especially after I fell asleep on you."

"I believe you're tha one that wanted this love." He reminded her. "You’re the one that offered."

"Well, yeah…"

Pete wrapped his arm around her waist and held her hand, lacing his fingers in with hers. He nuzzled his nose into the back of her neck.

"I'm pretty glad you did though." He admitted. This was the most love he had felt in a long time. He really felt like the person he was with wanted him, needed him. That she was focused on him, and it made him want to be focused on her. He felt an actual connection, which is something that he had been missing.

"I'm not goin anywhere for awhile love." He said as he squeezed her into hug, pulling her body to his. "I loved those sounds I heard earlier. They drove me crazy. I look forward ta havin' ya make more."

Lauren giggled as Pete kissed the back of her neck. Neither knew what the future would hold, but right now they were both enjoying the moment.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #354

���swimming through the void, we hear the word  /  we lose ourselves, but we find it all”

The last time you washed your hair, did you use conditioner? I never do. My hair is naturally pretty oily, and conditioner just adds oil to it. Do you prefer light or dark jeans? Dark. I never liked light-hued jeans. When you listen to music, do you generally sing along, or just listen? I almost always just listen. Do you have any of your exes as friends on Facebook? Yes. Who was your first love? Do you ever miss that person? My first "real" boyfriend. I always do to varying degrees. How many cars are parked at your house right now? Just one. Do you have any Italian ancestry? No. Do you prefer water to be ice cold or at room temperature? The colder, the absolute better. I can barely stomach drinking water that isn't cold, like literally. Has anyone ever told you you’re a control freak? No. Do you know anyone who has gone missing? If so, were they ever found? I don't think so, anyway. What was the spiciest thing you’ve ever eaten? A certain hot sauce on the wings I used to get at Buffalo Wild Wings. It was close to the top of their little heat rating thing. It made me feel awful, and yet I enjoyed it still?? I think it was an adrenaline thing. I only get medium sauce now; I'm more interested in enjoying my food than feeling like I'm eating fire. Do you need to talk to someone? I'm ready for my therapy appointment honestly, but it's not 'til the start of June. Mom and I both don't want to go through the process of finding a new one, so I've chosen to just suck it up and wait. Is something confusing you at the moment? I'm always confused with myself and my feelings. When was the last time you had a real deep chat? Real deep, I'm sure that would've been during PHP. Who did you last see on webcam? My former group therapist. I miss him a lot and really wish he could treat me outside of the program, but he doesn't do that. :/ What’s your best friend’s pet’s name(s)? Doris, Martha, Crowley, Little Dot, Jane Marie, Buster, Beesly, Winter, and I believe only one of the fish is named: Raisha. Have you ever taken a picture while laying in the grass? No. Who’s your favorite Disney character? Dory, probably. Have you ever deliberately tried to get someone drunk? What the fuck, no. When was the last time you used a pay phone and who were you calling? I've never used one. Do you like being kissed on the neck? Whoa now buddy, we better be kind of serious by then for you to do that because it doesn't end "well" lmao. Have you ever had sex with someone you weren’t dating (but had feelings for) in the hopes that they would ask you out later? I almost deleted this question because I didn't want to answer it, but I try to leave more unique ones in, so... whatever. I haven't. But I would for "somebody." What’s the most you would be willing to spend on a good bra? Ugh, my relationship with bras is a hellish one because NONE FUCKING FIT ME CORRECTLY. Mom's tried so, so many places, so many different stores online and in-person, and even if the bra fits in the front, it won't go around my back comfortably. I guess my body is shaped weird, I don't fucking know, because I have literally ZERO bras that don't aggravate me. At some point, I'm going to some woman Mom knows who can size me properly and therefore buy some that don't piss me off. All that to say I'd actually pay more than the usual, but not a ridiculous price. Do you have any of your teachers’ personal cell phone numbers saved in your contacts list? My old Physical Science teacher, who is actually now a very close family friend and our landlord, is in my phone. Do you ever stalk peoples’ personal blogs, even if you don’t know them very well? No. What’s one thing about today’s generation that you just can’t stand? How ungrateful they can be. Be honest: how do you feel about abortion? I am pro-choice. Is there anyone you currently want to reach out to? There's a lot of people, actually. Old friends I miss. What is your favorite piece of art you own? It... sounds cocky, but it's probably the drawing I did in high school of Pyramid Head and the Halo of the Sun intertwined. I worked my fucking ass off and I'm extremely proud of it. What’s the one thing you apologized for this month? Hm. Probably just something minor, like bumping into Mom or something when passing her. My favorite color is ______? Pink, specifically pastel pink. I wish I had _____? A job. What did you buy today? Nothing. What has challenged your morals? Life, my dude. Live and learn. What made you pick up the last book you started reading? It's the sequel to the last book I read. What about your life concerns you the most? Concerns me, my physical health, especially just how weak my legs are. I'm terrified of them continuing to deteriorate. What do you find particularly offensive? Would you say you’re easy or difficult to offend? I cannot fucking stand the misuse of the word "retarded." Like just keep your damn mouth sewn shut if you have the audacity to say things like "hurr hurr this driver is retarded." ANY mental illness/condition is NOT to be mocked. Onto the next question, I'd say I'm more towards difficult to offend. It really depends on the topic. What was the last series you finished watching? Do you have any plans to begin another? I re-watched Fullmetal Alchemist w/ Sara. We're working on Avatar: The Last Airbender too, but I won't resume watching it again until we can do it together. What is one way in which you are different from a year ago? What is one way in which you are still the same? Well, I weigh a lot more. .-. I gained back almost all the weight I shed since quarantine started, and I'm forever fucking furious about it. I'm the same in most other ways. If you could learn about anything without the stress of grades or cost, what kind of classes would you take? Uhhhhh meerkat behavior? Idk. Name a song you’ve listened to today? I've got Halocene, Lauren Babic, and Violet Orlandi's cover of "Aerials" by System of a Down on loop right now. It's fucking gorgeous and so mesmerizing. When you were younger, did you have a swing set or a playhouse in your backyard? We had a small playhouse with swings and a slide. Is your mall nice? GOD no. You better accept the possibility of getting shot before you walk in there. There's nothing that cool at all there. Do you have a Sonic near you? If so, what’s your favorite drink from there? Yeah. I love the strawberry slushy, and the Reese's Blast thing if KILLER. Will you be voting in the presidential elections next time around? Yes. How do you feel about chocolate-covered strawberries? GOOD. STUFF. Did you ever stop having feelings for someone and then started having those feelings again for them? I think so. Do you hate the last guy you had a thing with? No, he's my closest guy friend. To whom did you last give the finger? Probably some idiot that ran a red light. I'm sure it happened in the car, whenever it happened What was the last musical instrument played in your presence? I've got no clue. Do you like sprinkles on your ice cream? No, I hate the texture difference. And just sprinkles in general. Honestly, have you ever crashed a party before? No. Do you know how to do the moon walk? No. Has anybody ever told you that you have a good singing voice? Yeah, but I beg to differ. Onion rings or french fries? French fries. I'm not a big fan of the other. Has anybody ever described you as a heart breaker? Nope. Has anybody ever told you that you talk too fast? When I'm excited, yes, it happens sometimes. Who is the best cook that you know? Uhhhhh idk. Which meal throughout the day do you skip the most? I don't really skip meals. What’s the largest amount that you can juggle at one time? I can’t juggle at all. What was your favorite thing to go on at the playground as a kid? Swings. I'd dash to those at recess to try to actually get one. Do you know how much you weighed at birth? How much? All I know is six pounds, no clue on the ounces. Which aspect of your daily routine takes the most time? What do you do? Sitting my ass at the computer, really... I don't exactly do much. Do you enjoy buying gifts for others, or could you do without this? It feels sucky of me considering whenever I do get someone a gift, it's because Mom is letting me use her money with me being without an income, BUT I still do LOVE the process of thinking of something meaningful for those important to me and hopefully seeing them love whatever I got them. I cannot wait until I actually can do that regularly. What is one thing you are expected to do, if anything? Take care of my pets. How do you tend to view driving? Monotonous or entertaining? I hate driving because you're in a speeding box of death, man. I do really want to start working towards my license though; I've long since reached the "enough is enough" point. But first I need new glasses so I can actually see five feet in front of me. Do you enjoy talking about music with others? Yeah! Is acting something you enjoy? No. I'm too awkward about it. When do you feel most accomplished? When I finish a big art pierce. Do you think Manwich is amazing or completely gross? I like 'em. Just messy, which I'm not a fan of. How many best friends do you have? One. Are you a smoker, drinker, pothead or none of the above? None of the above. If you have your ears pierced, when did you get them pierced? I don't remember exactly, but I was a kid. Do you own any exercise machines? No. I wish. On Facebook, do you have people listed as your siblings who aren’t really your siblings? Nah, but I used to do that. Have you ever drawn or painted a self-portrait? Painted, but only because it was a school assignment. Who was your last voicemail from? I don't get voicemails because mine isn't even set up. Have you ever been falsely accused of something serious? No. Did you ever set up a lemonade stand when you were a kid? No. When was the last time you spoke to someone in a different language? Not since I was taking a test in high school for my German course. My teacher was a Germany native, so she was a total pro and fun to learn from. Have you ever received an anonymous gift? No. Have you ever camped out somewhere for an event the next day? No. That's always sounded miserable to me. When were you the saddest in your life? 2016 was fucking miserable. Do you know anyone, personally, who is in an abusive relationship? Are you? I don't know if it's abusive, but it's toxic and dysfunctional as HELL. I don't know WHY she keeps going back to him, I feel awful for the woman. I'm definitely not, 'cuz I wouldn't tolerate that shit for half a second. If you have siblings, have they moved out or do they still live with you? They've both moved out by now. Have you ever gotten searched by the cops? Yes, as a safety protocol with mental illness stuff. Do you like fried rice? Yes. What was the last thing you drank? Would you believe me if I told you I have water right now?

[star-stucks]

could i possibly get a tarot reading for my relationship with nepeta leijon in my equius english timeline? thank you!

Quietly gurgles an apology; whenever folks ask for a relationship reading I never know how to tone the cards. Is it romantic? Is it platonic? Can I bite my fingers off yet? /j Sometimes it’s way obvious (like with this one imho), but you never know, honestly. Anyways, hope this helps.

How You Felt

Main: Reversed Ace of Wands (An emerging idea, lack of direction, distractions, delays) Sub: Temperance (Balance, moderation, patience, purpose)

How They Felt

Main: Sovereign of Coins (Nurturing, practical, providing financially, a working parent.) Sub: Conqueror of Coins (Hard work, productivity, routine, conservatism.)

Overall Relationship

Main: Judgement (Judgement, rebirth, inner calling, absolution.) Sub: Reversed The Moon (Release of fear, repressed emotion, inner confusion.), Reversed Nine of Wands (Inner resources, struggle, overwhelm, defensive, paranoia.)

Song: Lovely (Cover) - Lauren Babic, Sepharim

Explanation

So this one was particularly interesting because, right out of the gate, I got the most conflicting cards I’ve ever seen in a minute, but once I pulled the remainder of the spread, it definitely made more sense. Your relationship with Nepeta definitely seems platonic in nature, which surprises me, mostly because it seems to indicate that Nepeta was a friend who kept you on the straight and narrow, or at least from doing too many stupid things— which was the last thing I expected, since in the original canon text, it definitely seemed the other way around. Perhaps that was the English side of you bringing out a different side of her though? Who’s to say.

The overall relationship is... definitely something else as well. I think the two of you were an unexpected rock for each other, and made quite the pair of friends, in a good way. I can’t really touch on this too terribly much though, since I don’t know further details. Hm.

As per with my readings and with pendulums, please take this answer and analysis with a grain of salt. You know yourself best at the end of the day, and would know better about your relationship with Nepeta. <3

Thank you for the request! My apologies it took this long.

[toomanystoriessolittletime]

Nirvana 4/7

Summary: John had no idea what to do. Burying his wife  after only 5 years of knowing, loving her almost broke him. But he  wasn’t allowed to break. Not when he had Mia, their 4 year old daughter,  to take care of. But what happens when John got robbed of his car in  the middle of the night by no other then Iosef Tarasov, who also killed  his daughters dog? Stuck between a raging feeling of revenge and the  overwhelming urge to protect his daughter, John tries to make a  decision.

Warnings: none really

A/N: It was only a matter of time before Santino showed up...

Masterlist

Taglist:

@ladyreapermc / @meetmeinthematinee / @hisdeadwife / @fanficsrusz / @theolsdalova / @ficsnroses​ / @a-really-bi-girl​

“Daddy.” John heard a whisper next to him.

“Hm?” He asked low.

“Can we go to the playground?” Mia asked. John hadn't even opened his eyes yet. Slowly he opened one eye, looking in his daughter's excited face.

“What about you sleep a little bit more and then we go to the playground?” John suggested, looking at the clock on his nightstand. 6:23 am.

“But I don't want to sleep more...” Mia pouted. John sighed. It had been the first night Mia had been sleeping in her own bed since Helen died. And surprisingly she hadn't been crying. John and Mia had been back from New York for 4 days now.

“Where is she?” John asked as soon as he stepped inside of the Continental Hotel.

“She's upstairs with Marcus, Jonathan.” Winston informed him. John breathed in deep, closing his eyes.

“Can you take care of that for me?” John pointed outside.

“Already on it, Sir.” Charon answered instead. Thankful John nodded at him, before he made his way towards the elevator, followed by Winston and his dog.

“I didn't take you for a dog person.” John joked.

“I didn't take you for a father.” Winston shot back, making John chuckle.

“You might wanna change, before you go in there.” Winston suggested. John looked down at his bloodied knuckles.

“You might be right.”

“I thought Daddy was gonna wait for us here?” John heard Mia ask, as he walked into the room in fresh clothes.

“He's gonna be here any minute, Sweetheart.” Marcus whispered. John quickly walked to them and saw Marcus whispering something to Mia, before her head snapped in his direction. Climbing of Marcus lap she ran towards John, who picked her up and closely hugged her.

“There was a really really mean man outside today.” Mia said, making John swallow.

“Uncle Marcus and Mister Charon made him go away.” Mia continued.

“They did.” John said lowly, nodding towards Marcus who was ready to leave anyway. Slowly John carried his daughter from the living room to the big master bedroom that was overlooking the skyline of New York. Comforting he rubbed Mia's back, as he sat down on the bed.

“I thought you were gone too, Daddy.” Mia whispered against his neck. John's heart broke into a thousand pieces as he heard these words.

“I am never going to leave you alone, Munchkin. Never.” John had promised, as he kissed the top of the head of his daughter.

John closed his eye again, pretending to sleep, as he felt Mia crawling closer to him. He felt her little fingers poke his side above the covers.

“Daaaadddyyyy.....” She whispered again. John tried very hard to not smile. Mia was now crawling on top of him. He felt her weight on his chest, as she propped her head up on her elbows. Opening one eye again, he slowly got his arms from under the covers.

“Please Daddy.” Mia pouted. All she wanted was to go on the slide down the street. Why was her Daddy not getting out of bed? Finally opening both of his eyes John looked at his daughter, that seemed to look more like her mother everyday. Sighing he blinked a couple of times, before one of his arm caged her in, as his other hand began to tickle her side. Shrieking and giggling she tried to get off her father, but John wasn't having any of that. When he saw her crying because she was laughing so hard he finally let go of her. There was nothing better in this world, than hearing the laughter of his child these days. Mia immediately hid under the covers, pulling them over her head.

“Munchkin?” John asked, now a little concerned.

“Mia?” He gently pulled the covers from her, revealing her blushed face.

“Can we go to the playground, now?” She asked out of breath. John laughed, as he got out of bed, to get dressed and take his daughter to the playground. Before 7 am.

The next days continued like that. Well not exactly like that. John was supposed to take Mia to the kindergarden starting monday again, and he dreaded the thought of it. He knew it was good for her to see her friends again. But what would he do in the meantime? There were a couple of things he still needed to take care of. And he also wanted to get back to his book binding. In the last weeks there had been a couple of books he had put on hold and was due to finish.

“Daddy?” Mia called out on the following Sunday.

“Yeah?” John called back from the kitchen. Daisy came excitedly running towards him, followed from Mia.

“Can we eat pizza today?” Mia asked. John smiled.

“I thought you wanted to eat Chicken Fingers?”

“Hmmmm....” Mia tilted her head to the side, as if she was thinking very hard. John bit his tongue.

“Can we have both?” Mia asked after a while.

“What about Chicken Fingers today, and Pizza tomorrow after ballet?” John asked.

“Uh. Yes.” Mia nodded excited.

“Wanna help me make them?”

“Uhmmmm..... No.” Mia giggled and ran away. John shook his head chuckling as he put the flour and spices together. In the last years he became quiet the cook. Thanks to the internet. And his wife of course.

When they met he wasn't even able to boil an egg. He quickly got a hold of it, even participating in some courses together with Helen. Sadly he smiled as he put the chicken through the flour. It had now been almost 4 weeks since she died. He still put out two cups when he made himself a coffee in the morning. He had talked to Helen's sister Lauren the other day.

She had lost her first husband in a car accident. She told him about the good and the bad days. It took her forever to move on and find love again. Not that John could even bare the thought of replacing Helen. No. He would live his life for his daughter.

“I'm so sorry Mr. Wick. I can't believe what you've been through the last weeks.” Miss Bradley said, as John brought Mia to her ballet practice.

“Thank you.” He said quietly.

“You might if I stay? I knew Helen always did...”

“Absolutely. Just sit down in the back.” Miss Bradley smiled before she turned around and gathered the kids. John smiled at Mia who was waving at him in her little pink tutu. How on earth could someone be that adorable? Turning around he sat down on the only empty seat at the back of the room between two women as he watched the practice.

“They are adorable, aren't they?” He heard the woman to his left ask after a while. He turned his head to look at her and nodded.

“I am so sorry for your loss. We all are. Helen was a good friend.”

“Thank you. We are still trying to get used to her not being here.” John said.

“If you need any help, please don't hesitate. We're all stay at home mom's. Just reach out to us. We're happy to help.” The women on his right said. John turned his head to look at her.

“With anything. Just call.” She smiled a little, before she handed him a piece of paper with her number. Confused he took the piece of paper. The woman whose name apparently was Julianne nodded at him, before he could see her clearly straightening her back to push her chest forward, which gave him an unexpectedly clear view of her cleavage. Nodding at her, he smiled awkwardly little, before he let his gaze wander through the room. All the woman were starring at him. Internally sighing he ignored them and watched his daughter doing a pirouette. That was what he was here for.

They were finished with making their pizza later when they got home, which gave John just enough time to bathe his daughter. Which she absolutely hated.

“But I don't want to...” She whined as John helped her pull her shirt off.

“Only clean little Ladies are allowed to have pizza, munchkin.”

“Then I don't want pizza.” Mia crossed her arms in front of her chest.

“You don't want to have pizza? Not even with all the cheese you put on it by yourself? You want to make Daddy eat it all by himself?” John asked.

“I forgot about the cheese.” Mia sighed, making John chuckle.

“Let's shower quickly. Then Pizza. And then we watch a movie.” John suggested.

“Can we watch the movie, while we eat pizza?”

“That we can do, Munchkin.” John agreed.

It was close to 11 pm when someone rang the doorbell. Thankfully John was sitting in the basement, in the middle of restoring a book, and had the bell set to silent. He looked at the monitor hanging next to the door and saw the face of Santino D'Antonio looking up at him.

“I know you're home John.” He heard him through the speaker. Sighing John got up from his seat and walked upstairs. He breathed in deep, before he opened the door.

“John.” Santino said in greeting, a small smile on his face. John looked the Italian in front of him from head to toe.

“Santino.” He said lowly.

“Aren't you going to invite me in?”

“I'd rather not.”

“But there's business we have to...”

“We don't have any business together. I'm out.” John interrupted him, making Santino sigh.

“See this is where you are wrong. It was you who killed Viggo, wasn't it?” John breathed in deep. Slightly he stepped aside to let Santino in, stepping in front of his guards with a glare, before he closed the door in front of them.

“You have a beautiful home.” Santino said as he walked further inside the house.

“Thanks.” John said gesturing towards the dining table.

“I'm sorry for your loss. I can't imagine what you are going through. After giving up so much for her.” Santino said, looking at a picture of him and Helen hanging on the wall.

“I didn't give up anything for her. Nobody is supposed to live like this.” John said. They sat in silence for a while, just looking at each other.

“I need you to do a job for me.” Santino said after a while.

“No. I'm out.” “With you killing the first of the little lambs from Viggo, you were back. Even if you don't think so, this is how it works.” John sighed, as Santino slid the marker over the table.

“Don't make me do this.” John said quietly.

“I'm not making you do this. You did this by yourself, John.” Santino said. John clenched his jaw as he looked up at him.

“I need you to kill Gianna.” Santino explained.

“Your sister?” John asked.

“She's the last thing that stands between me and my seat at the high table.”

“So you want me to kill your own sister?”

“Yes.” Santino simply said. John was about to tell him to go fuck himself, when he heard a whimper from upstairs. Santino looked up in the direction the stairs led.

“Ah. Yes. I heard about you having a daughter. Please. Go to her. I will be waiting right here for you.” Santino smiled. John swallowed and got up from his seat, before he turned around and took the stairs.

Mia was fully sobbing in her bed when he opened the door.

“Hey munchkin.” John said softly, getting into her bed, putting her arms around her. Her tiny hands came around his neck, as she breathed harshly.

“What's going on? Did you have a nightmare?” John asked. He could feel her shake his head.

“What was it then?”

“I... miss Mommy....” She sobbed quietly.

“Oh Munchkin. I miss her too.” John said soothing.

“Why did she have to go?” Mia asked. Yes why? That was a question John had been asking himself, ever since Helen got sick. And he didn't have an answer to that.

“I don't know. But you know what? She can hear and see us. Wherever we are. You just can't see her.”

“Really?” Mia asked and yawned. She had stopped crying.

“Yeah. When you miss her very much, just tell her.”

“I miss you Mommy.” Mia said after a while.

“I miss you too, Love.” John said, as he closed his eyes, kissing the top of his daughters head. Carefully he looked down, to find her asleep in his arms. All he wanted to do is sleep with her here, but there was an Italian Mob Boss downstairs, who needed an answer from him. John knew there was no way of getting out of this. He had to kill Gianna. And Santino would probably contract him afterwards like the little shit he was. He needed a plan. A plan that secured him being alive at the end of all of this.

He saw Santino standing at the window in his living room, that overlooked the lake.

“I need a week to sort out some things.” John began, catching his attention.

“I figured. And you get it.”

“After that the marker is fulfilled an I never want to see you again.” John clarified.

“You won't.” Santino promised.

“I guess I don't have to say that should come any harm to my daughter...” John said, letting the sentence end, as he looked at Santino.

“Even I wouldn't be so stupid as to threaten your child. Or any child. What do you think I am? Heartless?” Santino smirked. Yes. That was exactly what John thought.

“I give you two weeks. Then you have to be in rome. Sort your stuff out till then.” John nodded at Santino.

“Don't do anything stupid, Jonathan.” Santino said, as he walked by John towards the door.

“Same goes to you.” John followed him. That made Santino laugh.

“I wouldn't dare.” He smirked before he nodded at him and closed the door behind him. John didn't know how long he stood there, watching after him. He was fucked.

[sportsnightnut]

scully/stella prompt: they meet in London doing something entirely ordinary and boring (as so many fics begin in a bar). they're grocery shopping, taking the tube, at the market, the bank - you choose!

Oh, this was such a fun prompt. Thank you, my friend! This is my first Scully/Stella fic, and I gotta tell you, all it makes me want to do is write more.

Enjoy! 💛

i’ll buy you dinner first

5:37. Not much of an on-time departure from the office, but when has that ever been the case, really?

It’s Friday night and it’s been raining the whole damn week, as it’s apt to do this time of year in London. Stella wants to get home, kick off these stilettos in the middle of the floor without giving a fuck exactly where they land, have a glass or three of wine. But then she remembers she used the last of her coffee this morning, so she needs to stop on the way home to replenish it, lest Saturday morning turn into something mildly miserable. Ten more minutes in these shoes, she tells herself. You can do that. Just ten more minutes.

She shrugs on her trench coat and slings her bag over her shoulder. She’d been invited to go out with colleagues, but had politely declined. Social activities, particularly on a Friday evening, have never really been of interest to her. Friday night means home, silk pajamas, wine, a movie. And besides, she knew it was more of a pity invite than anything. Her colleagues like and respect her, sure, but the boss isn’t usually anyone’s first choice for a happy hour companion (unless it’s a party and the boss is buying, which was not the case in this instance).

Stella flips the lights off, starts making the trek home. There’s a Sainsbury’s between the office and her flat, so she decides to pop in there. They have a fine enough coffee selection, and maybe she can grab something to go with the leftover chicken in her fridge while she’s at it.

No basket, no trolley, because then she’ll buy more than she needs. Just straight for the coffee and tea aisle, stopping only to pick up a box of pasta on the way.

But then Stella rounds the corner and nearly drops the box of angel hair she’s holding. She comes dangerously close to running into, and subsequently toppling over, the cardboard display case of seasonal herbal tea.

Because in front of her is perhaps one of the most beautiful human beings Stella has ever seen.

She’s a bit shorter than Stella, although they’re probably a similar height without the stilettos. Fierce, dark red hair–one might even call it auburn–skims her shoulders. Stella’s first coherent thought is that all she wants to do is touch it, run her hands through it. God, it looks soft. I’m sure it would look similarly good spread out beneath her head on my pillow.

The woman is wearing a simple black dress and a gray cardigan with a pair of shiny black flats. She’s leaning against her trolley, standing in front of the coffee, looking absolutely baffled.

And the only thing Stella can conclude is that she absolutely must approach this woman. Because clearly she needs help. And clearly Stella should be the one to help her.

“Are you…looking for something?” Stella asks, stepping toward her. The woman raises her head and her lips turn up into a sweet smile.

Holy shit, she’s stunning. Stella swallows. Hard.

“I’m relatively new to London,” the woman starts. 

Oh, Christ, she’s American. She’s gorgeous and her accent is fucking adorable.

“This is…well, I’ve never bought coffee here before, so I don’t know what to get. None of these brands are familiar to me. I mean, there’s Starbucks, but I don’t like Starbucks that much, and…” she stops explaining, realizing she’s started to ramble. “I’m sorry. That’s probably not what you meant when you asked if I needed help.”

“Oh, no, that’s exactly what I meant,” Stella replies smoothly. “The store brand is fine, but I enjoy Taylors.” She points to one, her maroon polish shining in the light as she taps the bag with her index finger. “This blend is quite lovely.”

The woman smiles at Stella. “Thank you,” she says, and reaches for the coffee. Stella hands it to her, causing their fingers to touch, and she thinks she might die right here in the middle of Sainsbury’s because even though it was only half a second, she could tell how warm and soft the woman’s hands are and her mind immediately jumped to all the places she’d like those hands to be.

“You’re quite welcome. I’m Stella, by the way.”

“I’m Agent–” she stops herself, shakes her head. “Sorry. Still used to introducing myself that way. I’m Dana.”

Stella cocks her head, looks the woman up and down. “Agent, hm? From the States?”

Dana nods. “Yes. Dana Scully, formerly a Special Agent for the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation.”

God, what a fucking turn-on.

“So what brings you to London, then, Dana?”

“I’m a physician. I went to medical school before I was recruited by the FBI. A former colleague of mine recommended me for a position at a clinic here. I was ready to get away from my life in D.C. Too much history, a little too much pain.” Dana pauses. “I’m sorry, I’m practically telling you my entire life story in the middle of a grocery store.”

Stella smiles and touches Dana’s arm gently, wanting her to know it’s okay. She seems lonely, maybe a little uneasy being in a new country on her own. But god, a Special Agent for the FBI? It seems to suggest that she would understand Stella’s life, at least in some ways.

“No need to apologise. I work for the Metropolitan Police. Detective Superintendent Stella Gibson, to introduce myself officially. So I know a bit about what that life is like, Agent Scully.”

“Oh, wow,” Dana breathes. “Yes, you certainly do. Well–thank you for this,” she says, holding up the bag of coffee beans. “It was awfully nice of you to assist a stranger.”

“I could walk around with you a bit, if you like,” Stella proposes. “Help you get the lay of the land. Answer any other questions that may arise about British groceries.”

Dana giggles, and Stella is sure she’s going to die on the goddamn spot. It’s this sweet, sexy sound she wants to hear again. And again. And in other contexts, too.

She agrees readily. “I’d like that, Stella.”

Dana tries not to make it obvious that she’s trembling slightly as she walks alongside Stella. This woman is the definition of alluring. Long blonde hair curled at the ends, a little bit of makeup, the kind that makes it look like she really isn’t wearing any. A silky emerald blouse, a black pencil skirt, and tall stilettos that basically beg for Dana to notice her calves as she strides confidently down the aisle.

And she’s in law enforcement, which is (unsurprisingly) a major turn-on. Stella gets it. She knows the life, the job, the responsibilities, all of which require a certain commanding presence that Dana can’t help but think would come in useful in…certain situations.

And Dana is sure she looks really fucking hot wielding a weapon.

(Also, has she mentioned the British accent?)

Here’s the thing: Dana has never been with another woman. Not fully, anyway. Not in the “we’re in a relationship” kind of way. There was Lauren, an undergrad classmate who lived in her dorm senior year, but they only ever flirted, and usually only when drinking. Then in med school, there was Abby, who was in her surgery rotation. Abby was the closest she ever got, and it was mostly flirting with a few relatively innocuous makeout sessions (although it was always while sober, which made it feel very different from Lauren).

So the fact that Dana is incredibly, incredibly attracted to this woman has her more than a little unnerved.

They walk down the aisles together, Stella pointing out the locations of necessities like cereal and pasta, what the best baked goods are, what’s worth paying a little extra for and what’s just as good in the store brand. When Dana chooses a package of chocolate-filled croissants from the bakery, all Stella can think about is eating them with her. Naked, in bed, on a post-coital Sunday morning.

She clears her throat.

As they approach the dairy section, Stella observes that Dana seems a bit cold. Either that, or she’s inexplicably standing closer to Stella, which she admittedly wouldn’t mind.

She’s having trouble getting a read on Dana: she’s clearly not in a relationship now, as she moved to London alone (and mentioned something about moving away from something or someone painful). But she agreed to Stella’s company, and it seems like she’s been finding reasons to stand closer to her, accidentally brush against her. Didn’t move her hand away when Stella let hers linger for a moment longer than necessary.

But it’s still unclear if she’s that kind of interested.

The same cannot be said for Stella.

Dana is stunning, sexy. Beautiful and badass, and Stella wants her. Bad.

So as she shows Dana which cream she likes best for coffee, she reaches for the appropriate container and sets it in the trolley without ever breaking eye contact, her gaze focused on the woman next to her. They’re already close, but Stella leans in even closer, gets a hint of Dana’s perfume. She smells like raspberries and jasmine and everything good in the world. God, she wants to bury her face in her neck and perhaps stay there forever, just nibbling at that perfect ivory skin.

“Dana,” she starts. Her voice is dark, quiet, so none of their fellow shoppers nearby can hear what she’s saying. “If you don’t want this, you can tell me to kindly fuck off, and I will. But I feel compelled to tell you that you’re absolutely fucking beautiful and I would like nothing more than to take you home with me.”

Dana blushes, but not out of embarrassment, exactly. Stella knows the look, the reaction, this particular shade of flushed pink on the cheeks. It’s the reaction of someone who’s been “figured out,” so to speak. The reaction of someone who is pleasantly surprised that Stella finds her attractive in that way.

But it’s the cutest fucking thing, and it manages to warm Stella’s otherwise cold heart. 

Oh, god, this woman is going to do me in, she thinks. First I proposition her in the middle of a grocery store and the next thing I know I’ve got a fucking crush on her and I’m about to turn down a night of incredible sex so I can date her instead.

“Let me add this,” she says before Dana can respond, her voice still low and dangerously close to Dana’s ear. “I’ll buy you dinner first. At least once if not twice. Maybe three or four times. I’ll kiss you after the first time. And I’ll take you out for coffee. Oh, yes, definitely coffee. And really, whatever else you desire. Dessert, wine, whiskey, anything. Then after an appropriate amount of dates and innocent kisses, I’ll take you home with me. Pour you a glass of red wine while you stand in my kitchen. I’ll kiss you, but not as innocently as I kissed you before. And then I’ll touch you in as many places as you’ll allow me.”

It’s Dana’s turn to swallow. Hard.

“Yes,” she says almost inaudibly.

Dana says the word “yes” faster than her brain can process what’s happening.

She was relatively certain, throughout this entire encounter, that Stella found her attractive. It was mostly from the look in her eyes: caring and kind, yes, but also a little bit feral. It was clear when she put the coffee creamer in the cart that this was more than a friendly gesture. There was a want, a desire in her eyes, a look Dana hasn’t been on the receiving end of in years.

And the thought of being on the receiving end of it now terrifies her. Not because it’s a woman, not because it’s Stella. Because it’s been a long time. 

But it’s been long enough.

And she wants Stella just as badly.

“Yes?” Stella repeats, somewhat unable to believe that this beautiful creature wasn’t intimidated by the fact that she was incredibly direct about her intentions.

“Dinner sounds nice. And coffee. And…those other things you mentioned.” Dana clears her throat, and Stella thinks it’s absolutely adorable because it’s clear that Dana is flustered and nervous. But this also means she finds you attractive, Stella. Shit, the woman just agreed to go out on multiple dates with you knowing that at least part of your motivation is to get her into your bed.

Stella takes one small step back so she can look at Dana. She reaches over, caresses her cheekbone with her thumb, restrains herself from pushing her up against the cartons of milk and taking her right there. “Dinner it is, then. Anywhere you’d like. Tomorrow night.”

[katymacsupernatural]

A Royal Crush Part 9

Jensen Ackles x Reader AU

1100 Words

Story Summary: Jensen and Y/N meet at a masquerade ball. Immediately sparks fly, but Jensen isn’t revealing the truth about him. The truth that he comes from royalty. What happens when Y/N finds out?

Catch Up Here: Masterpost

A/N: I’m sorry this took so long. I’m trying to get back into the swing of writing. 

As the Queen looked you over, you tried to remain calm. Even though you knew there was no way you could ever meet her expectations. She was a Queen, of royal blood, who wanted the same for her son. You were a nobody, how could you compare?

You could just feel the ice from her stare as she pursed her lips together. Jensen must have felt it as well, stepping closer to you, wrapping his arm around your waist.

“Come now Camilla,” Jensen's father spoke up. “You're frightening the girl.”

The Queen finally smiled, holding out her hand, and you nervously took it. “I'm sorry my dear. Its It's just, we've never had Jensen bring home a girl before. I want sure what to expect.”

You gave her a shaky smile in return. “It's alright. I understand.”

“Jensen, why don't you bring your girl over here. We still have some tea left, and I bet you are both famished after your trip,” His Mom said, elegantly ushering to the seats behind her. Before you could find a seat beside Jensen, his Mom patted the couch beside her, giving you no choice.

Raising an eyebrow your way, Jensen sat in the chair beside his Dad, observing the interaction between you and his Mom. “Do you like tea?” Camilla asked you. “Jensen said something about a coffee shop, and I know how American’s are with their coffee.”

“Tea is wonderful. Thank you,” you assured her, just as a servant came forward, handing you a petite china cup on a saucer. The rest of the cups were quickly passed out, and you took a sip of the tea, sitting quietly, wondering what was going to happen next.

“I know this has to be crazy for you. Traveling all this way. Finding out that Jensen is a Prince.”

You swallowed quickly, trying to think of an answer without sounding like a trophy hunter, or some crazy American. “This has been a whirlwind. One that I hadn’t expected.”

The Queen turned to glare at her son. “I can’t believe you tricked her like that. Poor girl. You should be ashamed.”

Jensen glanced down, and you quickly came to his rescue. “But Ma’am, I really don’t think Jensen meant to do any harm. We just had a couple of chance meetings that turned into more.”

She nodded, setting her cup of tea off to the side before standing up and brushing her skirt down. “I know the two of you just arrived, but your Father and I do have a country to run. I know Jensen will take great care of you. And Benson will see to all of your needs. Meet together for dinner? We will have some guest over.”

You stood, having no idea how you should act around her. What you should do. If you needed to curtsy again, or bow or….

“Y/N and I will be ready for dinner,” Jensen assured his Mother, standing up and placing a chaste kiss on her cheek. “I think I’ll show Y/N up to her room. It has been a long trip.”

She smiled at you before walking out the door with her husband in tow. Once they were gone you finally felt as if you could breathe. “You okay?” Jensen asked, reaching for, and grasping your hand.

“I just met a Queen. A real Queen,” you whispered. “And she is your Mom. How...You grew up here?”

He chuckled. “Partly. I was sent off to school, and we had another estate in the country. But don’t let her fool you. She might act cold, but I do think she liked you. Now let’s show you to your room, and then maybe you and I can go for a walk afterward.”

“This way,” Benson announced as soon as you were in the hallway. Staying beside Jensen you followed along, staring at the grandeur all around. “I hope my room is close to yours. Otherwise, I might feel completely alone.”

“I asked that it was placed close, but my Mother wanted it to be as proper as it could be. So you are three rooms down, with my sister’s room in between.”

“And your sister? Is she here?” You asked as Benson started climbing the double stairs.

“She will be for the ball,” he answered, reaching for and clasping your hand with his. “You’ll love her, and she’ll love you. Everyone will. Just wait and see.”

Your room was on the third floor of the Royal Palace. Towards the back. Taking you through a maze of hallways, Benson finally stopped in front of a creamy white door. “This is your suite Ma’am. I think you’ll be quite comfortable here. I’ll send up Margaret up here shortly to see to your needs.”

With those parting words, Benson turned away, leaving you and Jensen standing in the hallway. “I don’t think Benson cares for me,” you whispered as Jensen pushed the door open.

“Benson is old fashioned. He was raised not to care for Americans. Just give him time.”

Stepping into the room, your jaw dropped at the opulence in front of you. It was more than a room, it was almost an apartment. Nearly as big as your home in New York, it was divided into a sitting room and bedroom. Complete with an antique queen-sized bed, matter dresser and lounge, it was the most extravagant room you had ever seen. Your luggage was already placed in the closet, and you could see a large bathroom hidden behind a door to the right. Glass doors led to a small porch, overlooking some of the carefully groomed gardens.

“This is my room? This is absolutely beautiful,” you whispered, moving to stand by the doors, watching as people walked through the gardens. “Who are they?”

Standing behind you, his hand pressed to your waist, he stared down at the scene below you. “Those are guests that have come for our ball.”

Turning to stare up at him, you knew he could see the nervousness in your gaze. “I’m so scared I’m going to do something. Say something that’s going to embarrass you. Or your family. What was I thinking? That I could come and pretend that I belonged with your family?”

“Y/N,” Jensen spoke strictly, pulling you away from your fears. “You’ll do great. They’ll love you, and they’ll consider you quirky. We’ll get through this, we’ll head back to New York, do whatever you want. Just relax and enjoy this like the vacation it is.”

Dean/Jensen Tags: @15wiishes @acreativelydifferentlove @adoptdontshoppets @a-girl-who-loves-disney @akshi8278 @all-will-be-well-love @anokhi07   @biawol @bebravekeeponfighting  @brindz30 @colette2537 @crusadedean    @haelyn @ikeneasul11 @imascio08 @its-not-a-tulpa @just-another-winchester @keikoraventeller @lauren-novak @librarygeekery @mirandaaustin93 @mlovesstories @msimpala67 @pisces-cutie @ria132love @ruprecht0420  @shadowhunter7 @sizzlingbearpolice @sleep-silent-angel @sortaathief @superseejay721517 @thegrungequeer @thewinchestergirl1208 @torn-and-frayed @wonderfulworldofwinchester

A Royal Crush Tags: @newtospnfandom @linki-locks11 @imascio08 @joseyrw @randomstuff-idontwannatalkboutit @destiel-equals-life @deansgirl215 @mysterious-398 @iamabeautifulperson18 @karouwinchester @meganywinchester @crazysocklovingfangirl @xristina-gkika @ronnie248-blog @missbosstown @topthis808 @closetspngirl @mirandaaustin93

Forever Tags: @16wiishes  @alexwinchester23 @algud @amanda-teaches @andkatiethings @andreaaalove @angelsandwinchesters @anspgene @artisticpoet @atc74 @be-amaziing @bemyqueenofdarkness @bohowitch @buckysmetalgoddamnarm @bumber-car-s @brooke-supernatural16   @camelotandastronauts @chelsea072498  @darthdeziewok @destiels-new-girl  @dslocum89  @docharleythegeekqueen @emmazach @emilicious-7 @emoryhemsworth @ericaprice2008  @esoltis280 @essie1876 @generalgoldfishldrm @gh0stgurl @goldenolaf25 @growningupgeek  @heyitscam99 @heythereamigodude @highfunctioning-soiciopath @hms-fangirl @hobby27 @horsegirly99 @ichooseeternalplaces @i-hear-crazy-calling-my-name @imboredsueme @internationalmusicteacher @ithinkimadorable-67 @iwriteaboutdean  @jayankles @jensen-gal @just-another-busy-fangirl @karlee-fay-my-wayward-son @keelzy2 @kittenofsarcasm @leanbeankeane @lifelovelaughangell123 @li-ssu @littleblue5mcdork  @lowlyapprentice @luciferslucille @maui137 @mellowlandrunaway @mersuperwholocked-lowlife @mogaruke @nanie5 @natashacamillaus @newtospnfandom  @offbeatwriting @percussiongirl2017 @pilaxia @pizzarollpatrol @plaid-lover-bay25 @randomparanoid @roonyxx @ronja-uebrick @rosegoldquintis @roxyspearing @samanddeanmyheroes @sandlee44 @shamelesslydean @sillesworldofwriting @sgarrett49 @skyewardolicitycloisdelena91 @smoothdogsgirl @spnbaby-67 @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester @spnwoman @sunskittlex @starry-chaos @superbadassnatural @thebikiniinspector @theflameontheinside @thing-you-do-with-that-thing @thisismysecrethappyplace @tina8009 @totallovelesson @tunadean @vvinch3st3r @walkslikesummeractslikerain @whimsicalrobots @wildlandfox @winchesterbrothers-inc @winchesterxtwo @winchester-writes @yourvoiceislikearose @zombiewerewolfqueen

[jaydeiswriting]

11/11/11 Tag

Rules: Answer the 11 questions of the person who tagged you, make up 11 questions, then tag 11 people to answer them.

Sorry this took so long. I'm really bad at tag games, but I do love to participate. Thanks for tagging me! I was tagged twice, so I'm going to do both.

Tagged by @liesversusjournals

1. Are you a plotter or pantser?

Definitely more of a pantser. I find if I outline things completely, I don't enjoy writing the draft or feel compelled to finish it. I have a lot of fun unpuzzling plot when pantsing and have a strong enough grasp of story structure to still produce a coherent draft.

2. Do you write using a computer or pen and paper?

Honestly, I do a lot of writing on my phone. I always have it on me and I'm a horrible typer. I do use a laptop for formatting and later drafts and I like to brainstorm on paper, but I do quite a lot of work on google docs on my phone.

3. How much writing do you get done on an average day?

Oof. I usually write at least a paragraph or poem every day so that's about 100-200 words. It usually leads to around 500 words if I'm writing prose, but not always. If I really don't feel like writing, I just don't. Which has been a lot of days in the past few months.

4. Which present work(s) are you most proud of?

I'm proud of my short story "Baby's Breath" (now called "Breathe for Me") in which a woman gives birth to a child with flowers growing in their throat, obstructing their airway. It has a ways to go, but it's fairly solid in this stage. I'm also proud the poem "Dancing to Our Deaths" which is a conversation on voicelessness in times of struggle and utilizing body language and ASL to reclaim voice without verbal speech.

5. Which past work(s) are you most proud of?

Hm, I don't know. I am proud of myself for writing and finishing things but as I look back, I see so many flaws in works. I take it to mean I'm better now, so I'm most proud of my current work.

6. Which present work(s) are you the least proud of?

Some short stories in They Leave Your Bones Behind have yet to reach their full potential. "Luminous Spaces" is basically my favourite concept, but it's not in the right place as of yet. It can be super dynamic and complex, but it falls a little flat in this early draft. It will get better, I hope, in revisions!

7. Which past work(s) are you least proud of?

I've written some really crappy stories in my childhood. Now that I think about it, when I was maybe 12, I used a site called Miss Literati and wrote a really weird romance I think is very cringe. Glad to have finished that novel, but it's like just not good.

8. Which books/authors have influenced you most?

The authors that helped me realize I wanted to write as a kid: Beverly Cleary, Kate DiCamillo and Cecilia Galante. And the books/authors that have illuminated, even in the smallest way, the niche I'd like to fill and/or the stories I'd like to tell: Kirsty Logan, Everything I Never Told You by Celeste Ng, Jen Campbell, Spellbook of the Lost and Found by Moira Fowley Doyle, Delicate Edible Birds by Lauren Groff, The Astonishing Color of After by Emily X. R. Pan, and Her Body and Other Parties by Carmen Maria Machado.

9. Describe your writing process from when you get the idea to when it's polished.

It differs from project to project, but generally I don't really outline. I write a zero draft to grasp what the story's going to be. Then, I reread and take notes about what changes I'd like to make in draft one. I completely rewrite for that draft, then from there make mostly smaller changes. It can be a lot of drafts until it feels 'polished'.

10. How many drafts do you write until you feel satisfied with a project?

It can be a lot. Anywhere from 3 to like 10 drafts. Probably 10 if I'm honest. I could go on forever, but you have to eventually concede if it's the best you can do.

11. If you could re-visit and write in any shelved project, which one would it be and why?

I have this one novel idea I've been working on for so long that I just haven't understood how to write yet, so I shelved it. If I could figure out how to get the story out, I would 100% return to it. I really like the concept and it's a slightly dark litfic novel, so it's not out of my wheelhouse.

Tagged by @softwishesx

1. What's your favourite stage of the writing process?

I absolutely adore both developmental and line edits. The story really comes together for me and I feel closest to it at this stage.

2. What's your least favourite stage of the writing process?

This is going to sound weird, but drafting. It's not that I don't like it, I just prefer having a baseline to work off of, which is why I usually write quick 'zero drafts' to start with.

3. What would you say is your greatest strength as a writer?

I think I generally do pretty well at creating interesting conflicts and maintaining tension in a piece.

4. What would you say is your greatest weakness as a writer?

I worry that I use too much repetition and over-explain concepts, undercutting the intrigue of a story.

5. What have you learned about your writing in the last year?

A year and a half ago, a post-colonial lit class cracked open the magical realism genre for me. Since then, I've found my niche in writing. I really enjoy writing literary fiction with elements of magical realism, leaning often into gothic horror and fabulism. I also prefer to write short works rather than novels.

6. Is writing full time something you would like to do or is it more of just a side hobby?

Honestly, I don't know what career path to follow. I'd like to work in literature in some way, but writing fiction full-time may not be realistic or the best choice for me.

7. Would you ever write a semi-autobiographical book? If so, would you ever reveal that it is semi-autobiographical?

Essentially, this is the role poetry takes for me. It's not always based on a specific experience, but it's often true to my emotions, fears, desires, etc. I write in a confessional style, so it reveals itself. I have, however, feared people putting experiences on me that are not my own based on their readings of my poetry, so I think I would try to be quite clear where I could.

8. What's your 'I have to write in this otherwise everything is trash' font?

I have to write every major project in a different font. They all have their distinct voices and moods and personalities, so they have to be separate. A Mouthful of Cotton is written in Garamond and They Leave Your Bones Behind is written in Spectral. I also often use Georgia and Times New Roman.

9. Do you read books similar to your WIP for inspiration while drafting?

Yes, absolutely! I've been reading a lot of poetry while writing poetry and reading a lot of literary fiction and magical realism when I can lately.

10. How many people in your real life know that you're a writer?

Pretty much everyone. No one would be surprised if I locked myself away for a while to write. I don't talk about it a lot in my life though.

11. What's one of the best lines you've ever written?

Ooh, tough question. I don't think many stories I've written recently are quotable because they're pretty early drafts and older ones have drifted too far from my voice. Here are some:

"What point was there to a magic that only worked if you believed? In a God that did the same?

We were all already grieving. If healing worked like magic, it wasn't working at all."

- "Muñeca", They Leave Your Bones Behind

"The strung up bodies of so many women made a collective wailing; they moaned stretched cello notes in a minor key."

- "Flesh", They Leave Your Bones Behind

I tag: @hobywrites @futureauthor-mabye @wolvesofarcadia @writer-jessicac @atelierwriting @delphwrites @headspace-hotel @lend-your-lungs-to-me @mademoiselleink @teacupwriter (no pressure, of course!)

What is your ideal writing environment?

Do you have any writing rituals?

What's your favourite aspect of drafting?

How do you go about brainstorming and developing ideas?

What was the most recent thing you've been inspired by?

Rainy day writing inside or sunny day writing outside?

Which themes/topics are you most drawn to?

Do you read a lot in the genre(s) you write?

How would you describe your writing voice?

Which project gave you the most challenges? How did you overcome them?

Which project gave you the most enjoyment to write?

[liketolaugh-writes]

Divine Intervention

Author: liketolaugh Summary: Miri Sánchez is looking for her brother, and the Phoenix Formula is not eternal life in the way the public thinks it is.

“We should stop at the park on the way back,” Miri insisted, bumping up against her brother’s shoulder with a smile. Isaiah huffed and bumped her back, glancing at the road ahead.

“For what?” he asked dubiously. “The park is boring. Unless you’re meeting someone there?” He gave her a pointed look, one eyebrow ticking up. “You knew I was coming to get you, so that’d be pretty rude.”

She gave him a cross look and hefted her backpack up her shoulder. “No, I’m not. But it’s not boring! That’s the whole point.”

“Wouldn’t you rather be home?” Isaiah countered. “Because I’d rather be home. It’s too cold out here and it’s going to rain at any damn moment.”

“You have a coat,” Miri protested. “I’d rather do my homework outside.”

Isaiah rolled his eyes, but finally waved a hand dismissively. “Today only,” he warned, and Miri hid a smile because this wasn’t the first time he’d said that. They took the next path left, which led down the hill to the park, and Miri asked,

“Don’t you get bored walking me home from school every day? I’m as old as you were when you started, now. I can walk home by myself.”

“Absolutely not,” Isaiah said immediately, and Miri frowned at him.

“I’m not a kid. I’m thirteen.”

“You’re a kid,” Isaiah disagreed, a slight smirk appearing on his face. Miri stuffed her hands in her pockets and stuck her tongue out at him, and then yelped when her backpack slid down her arm. She and Isaiah moved to catch it at the same time, and he smirked at her as she hefted it back up again.

“That doesn’t prove anything,” Miri protested. “You’re not that much older than me. Four years.”

“Four years is a lot, Miri,” Isaiah deadpanned.

“Not really, you know, not in the grand scheme of things, it’s only about a twentieth of a person’s lifetime, so really-”

“A twentieth is a lot too,” Isaiah said.

“You wouldn’t say that if you were cutting a pie into twenty pieces,” Miri said, and Isaiah laughed.

By the time they’d arrived at the park, Isaiah had actually stopped periodically complaining about the cold, but he didn’t go into the forest with Miri; he said that unlike Miri, he had a lot of homework and not just a little, so he’d rather get it done now.

The park, at this time of day, didn’t have any young kids yet, but there was a group of boys about Isaiah’s age playing basketball on the court. Miri glanced over, and caught sight of two men on the fringe of the trees – one brown-haired, green-eyed, and looking faintly pinched. Beside him was another man about the same age, with black hair and blue eyes and an intense, searching look, cast over the park.

The green-eyed man turned his head and caught her gaze, and his expression changed in a way Miri didn’t quite recognize.

Their gazes stuck for just a moment too long, and suddenly, Miri felt intensely uncomfortable. She looked away and took a few steps down the path, hesitated, and looked back. The two men had started walking, and the black-haired man called out once, and then again.

The second time, Isaiah looked up, and Miri shook herself. They were probably lost.

She turned away and walked on into the forest.

When she arrived back, Isaiah was gone, but his backpack – open and half empty, phone included – was still there.

“You aren’t normally this nervous about meeting people,” Atka remarked, tilting her head slightly to settle glazed eyes, not quite concealed by black bangs, on Miri, elbows settled on the table between them with an array of cards clasped lightly between her hands.

Miri swallowed and shrugged, shifting back subconsciously and head dipping downward.

“Mr. Castello is an important man,” she replied, avoiding Atka’s gaze by looking at the cards in her hand. “It’s getting to me, I guess. Not everyone can be the unofficial niece of the world’s leading life alchemist, Atka.” She flashed the other girl a quick smile and tapped her hand, red nail polish glinting in the light. “Got any twos?”

“Go fish,” Atka dismissed, not shifting her attention away. She didn’t even glance at her cards. Miri rolled her eyes. “You know you’re smart enough for this, right? You’ve got nothing to worry about.”

“That doesn’t actually stop me,” Miri said, mouth pinching in a half-grimace as her stomach turned just at the thought. “Call your card.”

Atka glanced down, just for a moment. “Kings?” she asked, and Miri shook her head. Atka drew. “Groundbreaking research doesn’t make him any less ridiculous a man. He likes to explain to people why hot dogs should be classified as a sandwich.”

“I’ll bite. Why?” Miri asked, not taking her eyes off her cards.

“Something about the language assignment being arbitrary,” Atka answered, a hint of a smile tugging at one corner of her mouth. “I stopped paying attention at some point.”

“Lucky you,” Miri murmured dryly. “Aces?”

“Hm,” Atka sighed, pulling out two and passing them over. Miri flashed her a smile and set the stack of four down. A moment passed, and Atka frowned, pushed her cards together into a stack, and asked, “Am I missing something?”

Miri blinked, actually looking up to her face again. “What?”

“You’re never insecure about your intelligence,” Atka said flatly. “And you don’t have excessive regard for authority or important figures. Is something wrong?”

Miri winced, pulling her cards to her chest, and took a beat to consider before she said, a little quieter, “I’m thinking about my brother.”

It was a half-truth. She was thinking about Isaiah. That just… wasn’t all of it.

She was thinking about Atka, too, with glazed green eyes and skin so pale it was tinged blue.

She glanced down at her own hand, with its darker tawny tone.

Atka bobbed her head once, gaze shifting away as she mulled that over. “Is it an anniversary?” she asked. “It isn’t the day he went missing, that was the month before last, and his birthday is next month.”

Miri grimaced at Atka’s blunt words and then shook her head. “Just a day,” she replied, and that was more like a lie. “Three years isn’t that long, you know? It’s hard to forget.”

Atka nodded, accepting that. “Do you want to meet with ‘Riah another day?”

A wry smile twisted Miri’s mouth. “If I don’t do it today, I’ll never do it,” she said. “But thanks.”

Atka granted her a brief smile, and then tipped her head up as someone knocked on the door. “That’d be him here now,” she noted, setting her cards down. “You ready?”

“As I’ll ever be,” Miri sighed, setting hers down as well. “You win, I think.”

Atka glanced back for a moment and grinned, there and gone. “Mm-hm,” she hummed, and then she was up and heading for the door. Miri rose as well, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. Showtime.

When she opened them again, Atka had let Zachariah Castello into the house.

He looked- amiable. Black hair and blue eyes, bright-eyed and grinning, almost an antithesis to neutral-faced Atka even as he reached out and gave her a quick, one-armed hug, making her scrunch up her nose and pull away with a roll of her eyes. Zachariah laughed and let her go.

Instantly, Miri wanted to either hit him hard, or push past him and out the door.

“It’s good to see you as always, Atka,” Zachariah said warmly, crossing his arms in front of his stomach. “Where’s your father?”

“At a conference,” Atka shrugged, stepping back to let him through and close the door behind him. “He’ll be back at about nine, he said. It’s kind of far away.”

“Busy man,” Zachariah chuckled. “I heard you had a friend who wanted to meet me?”

Atka nodded, turning and keeping pace with him back toward the living room. “This is Miri Sánchez,” she told him, gesturing at Miri. “She’s a classmate of mine, but we’ve been friends for about two years now. Sometimes we work on projects together.”

Zachariah met Miri’s eyes, and though she was looking for it, there was no recognition there, just an easy smile. “Is that so?” he asked, sounding pleased. He held out a hand for her to shake. “You must be good, then. Atka’s a little wonder when it comes to alchemy.”

It was through force of will that Miri didn’t drop her gaze, just reached out and took his hand in a firm grasp. “I like the field,” she said neutrally, and then made an effort to smile a little. “That’s why I’m seeking an apprenticeship with you, Mr. Castello. I’m more interested in healing magic than eternal life, but you know how much these things intertwine.”

It was something of an understatement. Zachariah Castello’s life work, the Phoenix Formula, was rumored to encompass elements of every field from healing to necromancy in its quest for immortality – though Zachariah’s former partner, Atka’s mother Lauren, had not lived to complete it. Some people wondered if that was why Zachariah sought its completion so persistently.

“That I do,” Zachariah said with a touch of humor, tilting his head with a wry smile. “And you’re in luck; Lauren specialized in healing magic before we started work on the Phoenix Formula, and I picked up more than a little.” He gave Atka a nod. “No wonder you’re working with Atka. It must run in the family.”

He moved toward the couch before either of them could reply, and the two of them tagged along after. Miri ended up between them, hands clasped between her knees as she tried to push down her anxiety, shoulders turned to face Zachariah.

“Why me, though?” Zachariah asked, tapping one of his knees, his smile faded into a thoughtful, intent look. “Why not someone who specializes in healing?”

“You’re a genius, Mr. Castello,” Miri answered, gaze unwavering, though her heart jumped in her chest. “And I think I could get a fresh outlook on the field from you.”

Another flash of a smile. “Flatterer,” he accused. “Did Atka coach you before I arrived?”

“I was going to, but she was too nervous,” Atka informed him.

“Nervous, eh?” Zachariah looked her up and down and then shot her a grin. “You’re good at hiding it.” Then, abruptly, “What are your grades like?”

“Not quite top of my class,” Miri answered, twisting her hands so one gripped the opposite wrist. He was so nice, and lively. It was hard to connect him with his work, like this. “But I haven’t gotten a B in years.”

Zachariah grinned a little, quirking up one eyebrow. “Through intelligence or work ethic?” he asked. “You’re sixteen, after all. College will be different, an apprenticeship more so.”

It was such a grown-up remark that it set her teeth on edge, and she had to drop her gaze and deliberately relax before she replied, “I like to think it’s a little bit of both.”

“Her work ethic better than mine,” Atka provided shamelessly. “When it comes to school work, anyway.”

“All your work ethic goes to your extracurriculars,” Zachariah shot back.

Atka shrugged. “Doesn’t keep me from getting good grades. School is boring anyway.”

“That’s going to bite you someday,” Zachariah said firmly, and then returned his attention to Miri. “I understand you and Atka work together sometimes, but do you have projects of your own?”

Miri played with her fingers for a moment, hesitating.

“I want to specialize in unusual afflictions,” she said eventually. “Right now I’m trying to reverse necrosis.” The admission tightened her chest a little, but she reminded herself that live flesh could rot for more than one reason. It didn’t have to mean anything.

Zachariah made an ‘a-ha’ sound of approval, sitting up quickly. “You know, that rings a bell,” he said thoughtfully, and Miri’s mouth went dry. “I thought you looked sort of familiar. Did you do a presentation on it? At a school fair, perhaps?”

“Once,” Miri said, quietly. She swallowed once, and then again, and when she continued her voice came out clearer. “It was about something else, though. Infection.”

Zachariah hummed again. “I’ll figure it out later,” he decided, smiling lightly. He didn’t speak for a heartbeat, and then he set a hand on his knee and leaned back with a firm nod. “Okay – Miri, wasn’t it? I’ll take you on.”

It took a second to process, and then Miri felt, at once, as if she were flying and falling. Atka jumped, and when Miri spared a glance back, she was beaming, a rare full-faced smile that crinkled her eyes.

“It’s on a trial basis, of course,” Zachariah continued, and Miri looked back at him to find the man smiling, warm and welcoming. “But I have high hopes for you, Ms. Sánchez. We’ll work out the details of your living situation and anything else another time. Here, let me-”

He reached for a notebook on the table and started scribbling, and Atka leaned over and gave Miri the same one-armed hug Zachariah had given her earlier, still smiling.

“Good job,” she whispered, too loud to keep Zachariah from hearing.

Miri managed a smile in return, twisting to make it a full hug and hide her face in her friend’s shoulder so she couldn’t see how sick it looked.

“Thanks,” she murmured. “For everything.”

She was going to apprentice under Zachariah Castello.

Zachariah’s house, it panned out, was even bigger than Atka’s; alchemy research paid well, since it wasn’t a field easily taught on a large scale. Magic varied too much from person to person.

“There are two lab levels,” Zachariah was explaining to her, letting her in with his characteristic habitual smile. “You’ll be allowed on the first, but the very bottom level is off-limits; most of my work on the Phoenix Formula is down there, as is some of Lauren’s, so only Rowan and I are allowed down there. No offense, of course.”

“What, you don’t trust me with your top secret research?” Miri deadpanned, keeping her breathing even despite the pounding in her chest. Zachariah laughed.

“Maybe someday,” he said cheerfully. “Rowan should be around here somewhere, I’ll introduce you. He’ll be around a lot, you see.”

Zachariah’s current partner. Miri nodded quickly.

“What does he specialize in?” Miri asked. “I’ve never heard.”

Zachariah hummed. “Mostly in making ideas workable,” he said with a grin. “He’s a lot more practical-minded than I am. But, specifically, he works a lot with the arcane. It’s not good for a lot of everyday stuff, but, well…” His grin widened a little, and Miri’s stomach turned, a lump forming in her throat. “The Phoenix Formula is nothing ordinary.”

“‘The modern day philosopher’s stone’,” Miri quoted, and Zachariah nodded.

“Exactly,” he said with satisfaction, and then, delighted, “Rowan! Come here, I need to introduce you to Miri.”

“I think you just did so quite effectively,” the man at the end of the hall said, but he swept toward them without further complaint, light brown hair and dark brown eyes that went straight to Miri, examining her.

His mouth tightened instantly, and Miri’s nerves shot through the roof.

“’Riah,” Rowan said, quiet. “What’s this?”

“My new apprentice,” Zachariah said, amused. “I told you last night. She’s working on reversing necrosis, you know? It’s right up our alley.”

Rowan’s gaze lingered on Miri, and Miri couldn’t bring herself to speak.

Even if Zachariah hadn’t figured it out, there wasn’t a doubt in Miri’s mind that Rowan recognized her.

After a long and lingering moment, though, Rowan’s gaze shifted back to Zachariah and he gave him a nod, shoulders still tense. “You sure know how to pick ‘em, ‘Riah,” he said.

“Oh, this was all Atka,” Zachariah laughed. “She’s a gem.”

“She’s something,” Rowan said dryly, and nodded at Miri. “It’ll be interesting to have you around, Miss Sánchez.”

“It’ll be interesting to be around,” Miri answered before she could stop herself, and winced at the downward quirk of Rowan’s mouth before he swept away.

Zachariah chuckled quietly. “Sorry, Miri,” he said, glancing at her. “Rowan was kind of against me taking an apprentice during this project. I’m sure he’ll lighten up once he gets to know you.”

Miri nodded, keeping her eyes on the door Rowan had disappeared into. “I’m sure,” she echoed.

“Your necrosis research isn’t half bad,” Zachariah said conversationally, not moving his gaze from the powdered chimera bone he was grinding. Miri paused, and then glanced up, wary. Zachariah smiled a little and continued, “I think you’re most of the way there. Just a few things to touch up, am I right?”

Miri hesitated, and then said, “I don’t have much cause to test it. But I think so, yes.”

“That’s impressive, for a girl your age,” Zachariah said easily, dropping the pestle and going to wash his hands. Zachariah wasn’t a fan of cross-contamination, he liked to joke. “What drew your attention to it?”

“Uncommon afflictions are interesting,” Miri said, the lie falling easily from her tongue. If she avoided Zachariah’s gaze while she said it- she was just busy. Anxiety tightened her chest. “Leprosy was one of the first that caught my attention, and the same problem crops up with crushing injuries and infections, right? I thought it would be useful.”

“You’re right, you’re right,” Zachariah agreed, grabbing a vial off the shelf. “Have you ever worked with this before?”

Miri eyed the vial and shook her head.

“Cerberus urine,” Zachariah said proudly. “Very rare, not very useful except in very specific situations. But you might find it interesting.”

Miri swallowed and asked, “What sort of situations?”

Zachariah grinned. “Already guessed it, haven’t you? It’s one of the elements I use in the Phoenix Formula.”

“That seems counter to your objective,” Miri said carefully.

“It’s like an antivenin,” Zachariah explained, tipping the vial into a bowl and then mixing in the powdered bone. “Gotta get a little death in before you can get it out.”

Miri stayed quiet for a long moment.

“I suppose that makes sense,” she said at last, her voice so soft it could hardly be made out.

Zachariah gave her a sympathetic look. “It should be relevant to your research too,” he said. “But in a different ratio. Give it a try.” He tapped the bowl of solution with one finger. “This here will end up as a treatment for severe infection. You see the similarities, don’t you?”

Miri nodded.

“Rowan had a hard time with it too,” Zachariah added, and smiled wryly. “He’s a little squeamish. But he’s an amazing friend.”

It was two months into her apprenticeship – two months of learning techniques from Zachariah and occasionally from Rowan, guiding her through rituals and potions and combinations thereof, things she could do without the inherent magic Zachariah possessed in his fingertips – before she got her chance.

But then she did, left to study in Zachariah’s library while he and Rowan went to find ingredients out in the forest. Zachariah had estimated they’d be gone for two hours, three at most – more than enough time.

Rowan had given her a long, lingering look before they left, but he hadn’t said anything.

As soon as she was sure they were gone, and hadn’t forgotten anything important, she left the library and headed straight for the stairs, descending first to the main lab – locked with a ritual Zachariah had demonstrated to her a week in – and then to the secret one.

The stairs, she was sure, didn’t lead to anything; Zachariah was gullible and trusting, but not careless. No one with a secret like this was careless… no matter how right they believed they were.

And her first guess was that the true entrance was somewhere in the main lab.

She edged her way around stocks of dragon eggshells and stores of Greek fire, beakers of kirin blood and vials of chimera venom. The main lab was a dangerous place, if you didn’t know your way around; Miri was fortunate that she had experience on her side.

Miri was a very cautious person.

So carefully, she picked her way through the stacks and stores, and forty-five minutes later she found her prize. A hatch, set under a basket of belladonna, padlocked shut and likely warded.

With a touch, she brought the wards to life – she’d never been more grateful for her natural gift, something she hadn’t demonstrated to another person since her brother disappeared.

It was almost symbolic.

The wards were good, textbook perfect. But not creative. Neither Zachariah nor Rowan specialized in warding, and neither had Lauren, as far as Miri knew. And none of them had trusted an outsider enough to handle this.

Carefully, so carefully, Miri learned the wards inside and out, memorized them, and then unmade them in meticulous strokes and murmured words, once crossing the lab to take some of the unicorn horn dust from the opposite end. She didn’t realize how shallow, how quick her breathing had become until her fingertips began to tingle.

Almost there. Almost there.

She opened the trapdoor, and found a ladder.

Miri didn’t dare turn on the lights, but she had her phone, and more importantly, her phone’s flashlight. She left the door open above her and descended the ladder.

The secret lab looked almost like the main lab – with rarer ingredients, fewer experiments in progress, but the same meticulous organization around the edges descending to chaos in the middle.

And then another door on the other side.

Miri went forward, and she reached the door.

She knocked.

“What do you want?” a voice snapped harshly from inside, and her breath caught. Tears rose to her eyes, and a lump to her throat.

She leaned her forehead against the door, swallowed, and took a breath.

“Isaiah?” she called, voice shaking just slightly. “It’s me, Miri.”

“…How do you know my name?”

Her eyes snapped open, and a moment later, she opened the door and shot through.

Isaiah – her older brother, missing for three years, Isaiah Sánchez – was there, all right, and it was a relief, heady and dizzying. And then she took him in.

He was on the other side of glass, frowning at her from a room surprisingly well-furnished. Miri wondered, distantly, if Zachariah thought that made it more humane, but she was swiftly distracted.

Isaiah looked just like she remembered – too much. He was too young. Not the same age, but not much older than he had been. His skin, once the same color as hers, was grey-tinged, and – she felt like throwing up – in some places, like his cheek and one hand along the wrist and the edge of his palm, it was blackened with rot. His eyes, like Atka’s, were glazed, but still dark brown like hers.

“Who are you?” Isaiah demanded, and she flinched. “I haven’t seen you before.”

Brain damage. It was- it had been a possibility.

She ducked her head, holding back tears, and trembled, just a little.

“My name is Miri,” she said, quietly. “I’m your sister. F-four years younger.”

When she glanced back up, Isaiah’s scowl had deepened.

“I don’t know you,” he said bluntly. “I don’t remember anything for ages.”

“That’s okay,” she said, fighting to keep her voice steady. “I’m going to get you out.”

[5hfanfiction]

Deliver Me Love (With A Side Of Fries)

A/N: Hey guys! So @lucyinthesk-y gave me this idea and I thought it was super cute so here’s this adorable oneshot based off of their prompt!

-

“Camila!”

“¿Sí, Papi?” Camila groaned in reply. She knew that yell meant she had another delivery run to do and she was not in the mood to bring another greedy human being their food.

Camila worked for her parents as a delivery girl for their restaurant, La Niňa Bonita, which they basically named after her. They started the restaurant a few years after she was born, wanting to give the people of Miami “real mexican food, not that mierda deseducada they serve at Taco Bell”.

Camila was honestly only working there for money and to kill time between her transition from high school to college. Don’t get her wrong, she loves her parents, and she loves the restaurant, she just loathes the people who she delivers to.

“We got a big order going out, mija. Must be a party or something!” Alejandro, Camila’s father, yelled excitedly.

“Exactly how big, Papi?” Camila asked tentatively, a little scared at how happy he was to be making her drive around a lot of food.

“Hm.. enough to feed seven people? Maybe eight?”

“Holy shit, dad!”

“LANGUAGE MIJA!” Sinuhe, Camila’s mother, yelled from the kitchen, making Camila grumble profanities under her breath.

“Just think of the tips you’ll get!” Alejandro said encouragingly.

“Yeah definitely, the last ten people were too stuck up their ass to give me anything,” the brunette grumbled so her mom wouldn’t hear.

“If you don’t get something good out of this delivery, I’ll buy you ice cream, okay?” her father bargained with her.

Camila’s face lit up immediately. “Deal, now help me get this in my car so I can hurry back and get my ice cream.”

-

Camila drove through University of Miami’s campus, searching for the building she was delivering to. She knew for sure her dad would owe her ice cream, college kids were the worst when it came to tips and manners. When she finally found the building she was trying to find, she got all of the bags of food in one trip (because momma didn’t raise no bitch), and entered the building. She got in the elevator and took it up to the 7th floor, and began her search for the room she was looking for.

Camila vaguely remembered as she walked down the hallways that she took a tour of this building when the university accepted her as a student, the guide saying that this was the main freshman housing. She was surprised it was so quiet, you’d think that college freshman on a Saturday night would be obnoxiously loud.

When she finally found room 727, she set the food down onto the ground, shaking her arms out a bit before knocking on the door. She heard a thud on the other side of the door, followed by a muffled “fuck”. She would’ve giggled had the door not opened immediately afterwards.

Camila couldn’t be blamed for her mouth hanging open. The girl in front of her was hot, like Megan Fox’s long lost daughter hot. Her eyes were bright green, sparkling in the dim fluorescent light as she looked at Camila. Her dark hair was down in unruly waves, cascading down her shoulders and strewn across her face. The girl in front of her ran a hand through her hair to tame it, and Camila was sure that she was in the presence of a goddess.

“Hey, what’s up?”

‘Fuck, even her voice is hot!’ Camila thought to herself. The girl was staring at her patiently and Camila suddenly remembered why she was here.

“Oh shit, my bad, I just uh.. Delivery?” Camila hurried out, her cheeks flushing in embarrassment at her inability to be a normal human being in front of pretty girls.

The girl in front of her giggled at her flustered state, nodding, “Yeah, that’s for me.”

“Are you having a party or something? I mean this is an assload of food,” Camila asked as she glanced at all the bags at her feet.

This time, it was the girl’s turn to blush. “Uh, no. I just, uh, I really like your guys’s food? So I just kind of order in bulk?” she replied, sounding more like she was questioning herself than answering a question.

Camila laughed at her response, finding the girl absolutely adorable. “Well, who am I to judge?” She smiled, making the girl in front of her visibly relax.

“Well here’s what I owe you..” she trailed off slowly.

“Oh, I’m Camila.” The brunette introduced herself with a small wave.

“Lauren,” the girl replied with a bright smile, handing her the money.

Camila counted it quickly, her brows furrowing in confusion. “Lauren you realize this is like ten dollars more than you owe, right?”

“Keep the change,” Lauren shrugged.

Camila immediately shook her head, trying to give the money back to Lauren, “I am not taking this much money from you, from what I know all college kids are broke and ten dollars is like gold to you guys.”

“No, I insist. Take it, please,” Lauren spoke as she placed the ten in Camila’s hand and closed the brunette’s fist with her own hand. Camila could only nod dumbly, too shocked by the fact that the gorgeous girl in front of her was basically holding her hand.

“Do you need some help getting that into your dorm?” Camila offered.

“Don’t worry about it, I got this,” Lauren smiled happily. “Thanks again, Camila. It was nice to meet you.”

“Anytime, Lauren. It was nice to meet you too,” Camila replied easily, making her way back to her car with a permanent smile on her face.

-

“So do I owe you ice cream?”

“Not this time, Papi.”

-

It had been maybe two weeks since Camila had met Lauren. Every time her father called out a big order for her to deliver, she would secretly hope it would be the green eyed girl, but every time it was some asshole that treated her like second rate garbage instead. She figured she must’ve scared her with her awkward gawking and inability to form a coherent sentence.

Camila was sitting in the restaurant, idly playing with the salt shakers while waiting for her shift to end, when her father called out to her from the kitchen.

“Camila! There’s one last order I need you to run and you can go straight home afterwards if you’d like, I won’t need you anymore for the rest of the day.”

“Can I just leave my uniform here then?” Camila questioned.

“Sí, no me importa,” he responded with a wave of his hand, “I’ll load your car while you change.”

Camila walked into the back room, taking off her uniform and replacing it with her Stussy crop top and ripped high waisted jeans. She took her hair out of her ponytail and shook it lightly, looking into the mirror to make sure she didn’t look like she just woke up. Satisfied that she didn’t look like a half dead zombie, she met her father out by her car.

“Where to this time?” Camila asked Alejandro.

“It’s those party people again,” Alejandro smiled as he handed her the address.

Camila’s eyes widened as she read the familiar address. It was Lauren. She looked up at her dad, who was still smiling at her, and she hugged him tightly.

“Gracias, Papi,” she mumbled into his shoulder, “I’ll see you later.”

-

Camila sat in the parking lot of Lauren’s building, touching her makeup in her rearview mirror. She was really nervous about seeing the green eyed beauty again. Admittedly, it’s probably because of the small crush Camila had developed on the girl, but she pushed that thought out of her head immediately.

She couldn’t possibly be crushing on someone she met once, could she?

She made the journey up to Lauren’s dorm, her heart pounding harder with every step she took towards her door. She sent the food down and knocked lightly.

The door opened to reveal Lauren, clad in a pair of black ripped skinny jeans and a The 1975 shirt. She was wearing barely any makeup but it was just enough to make her eyes look absolutely stunning, and her hair fell down in gentle waves.

Well shit, Camila was definitely crushing on her.

“Uh h-hey there,” Lauren stuttered, a blush rapidly spreading across her cheeks.

Camila’s head tilted in confusion, until she remembered that she wasn’t in her uniform this time. This time she actually looked hot, and Lauren was stuttering which meant..

‘Holy shit she think’s I’m hot,’ Camila realized. An idea popped into her head, she could use this to her advantage.

Camila basically gave the girl the smoulder. She ran a hand through her hair, tousling it to one side as she looked up at Lauren through her lashes, biting her bottom lip.

“Hi, Lauren,” she spoke, her voice slightly raspy.

“Oh fuck,” Lauren mumbled under her breath.

“Did you run out of your stock, I assume?” Camila asked, smiling teasingly at the girl.

“Sadly, yeah,” Lauren replied, finally able to form a sentence. “It’s good to see you again, you look.. You look amazing,” she spoke honestly, causing Camila to blush.

“Thanks, I’m just glad to not be in that uniform for the rest of the night,” the brunette giggled.

“Oh yeah? Then why are you here if you’re done with work?” Lauren asked curiously.

“You’re actually my last run, then I’m going home to eat ice cream and watch cartoons,” she answered honestly.

Lauren pulled out her money to pay Camila for the food, cursing as she counted it.

“Fuck, I don’t have enough money to tip you,” Lauren exasperated as she ran a hand through her hair.

Camila just shook her head at her and smiled, “You don’t have to tip me, Lauren. I don’t mind at all.”

Lauren stood their for a moment, looking completely torn. Camila thought she looked like a puppy, in all honestly.

“You said you’re off, right?” Lauren asked, to which the brunette nodded.

“Would you uh, would you maybe wanna share some of this food with me?” she asked timidly.

Camila was surprised for a second, that this gorgeous girl was asking her to hang out with her, but she smiled immediately afterwards.

“I’d love that.”

-

“Oh my god no! There is no way that Lana Del Rey follows you on twitter!”

Camila and Lauren had spent the better part of the last hour basically rolling on the couch laughing as they talked and got to know each other. Camila learned that Lauren was studying architecture with a minor in women’s studies because she’s extremely passionate about art and the state of world. She also learned she lives alone since her roommate dropped out of college, leaving her to a dorm by herself. Lauren hates the color orange, loves her family more than anything, and wants to use her voice to educate those around her to love and not hate.

Camila, in turn, tells Lauren that she’ll be starting at University of Miami next fall, majoring in music composition, because she’s always been incredibly passionate about putting her emotions into the swell of the violins and the beat of the drums. She told her about her parents own the restaurant she delivers for, which Lauren tells her to thank them for making actual authentic Mexican and Cuban dishes because she would probably have died without a good meal from her parents if it weren’t for them.

Currently, Lauren was telling her about the time Lana Del Rey followed her on twitter. She said that her friends had told her that she followed Lauren, and green eyed girl called them “fucking idiots” until she looked at her phone and saw it for herself.

“I promise she does, look!” Lauren showed her Lana’s twitter, the space below her username saying “Follows You”.

“Holy shit, that’s amazing!” Camila exclaimed, making Lauren smile brightly and nodding.

Camila finished her food, slightly disappointed that she would have to leave now that her only reason for being here was gone.

Lauren must’ve sensed the shift in her mood, because she placed her hand on the brunette’s knee and looked into her eyes. “Are you okay?”

Camila gave her a fake smile, “Yeah I’m good.”

“Don’t do that, what’s up?” Lauren looked right through her facade and it kind of scared her.

“It’s stupid, don’t worry about it,” Camila waved it off.

“If it’s upsetting you, it isn’t stupid,” the green eyed girl spoke seriously.

Camila just sighed, knowing she wasn’t getting out of this. “I just.. I don’t want to leave yet..” Camila trailed off.

Lauren tilted her head to the side, looking at her like she was crazy. “Who said you had to leave?”

“I just thought that since we finished eating-”

“Hey, you can stay as long as you’d like. If I didn’t want to hang out with you, I wouldn’t have invited you in.”

Camila looked into Lauren’s eyes to see if she could find any sign of dishonesty, but she saw nothing but truth. They stayed there for a moment, just looking into each other’s eyes, pulling each other in, until Camila saw Lauren’s eyes flicker down to her lips and back up.

Camila bit her lip subconsciously, noticing the way Lauren’s breath hitched slightly when she did. She didn’t notice how close they were until she could feel the other girl’s breath hit her face. Camila looked up into the girl’s emerald eyes one more time before shutting her eyes and leaning in, lips meeting halfway.

Camila sighed into the kiss. Lauren’s lips were the softest she had ever kissed, gently leading her as they kissed. The green eyed girl nipped at her bottom lip, making the Latina groan quietly. Camila felt the hand on her knee move up to her thigh as she tugged her closer and ran her tongue along her bottom lip, deepening the kiss. They kissed like that for a while, so natural that it was like they had kissed many times before. Their kisses slowed until Lauren was the first to pull back, resting her forehead against Camila’s.

“I’ve been wanting to do that since I first saw you,” Lauren admitted breathlessly.

Camila giggled slightly, “God, same.”

Lauren sighed happily, kissing her once more before leaning back to look into the brunette’s eyes.

“Does this mean I don’t have to order more food this week as an excuse to see you?” Lauren asked hopefully.

Camila laughed loudly at her words, leaning into Lauren’s shoulder to keep her upright.

“Definitely not.”

-

A/N: Thank you all so much for reading! I apparently love writing fanfiction now so I’m gonna be writing a lot of stuff coming up soon! 

Be sure to check out my story Touch My Soul (Hold It Tight) and my other oneshot Be Mine For Like Five Seconds! I promise they’re not awful.

I love you all and I hope you’re all doing well

-Katie

(As always, you can find my story on wattpad here)

[ihavealavalamp]

here’s chapter five of misfortune so far! it’s about halfway done, or maybe two thirds, idk. lots of dialogue and stuff

December, 2012

The menu for breakfast was pancakes. Carla had accidentally slept in and no one had bothered to wake her up, so it was a surprise when she had exited the spare bedroom to see everyone at the table, all fully changed and feasting on stacks of pancakes.

"Sorry, I would've woken you," Mallory laughed when Carla had gotten dressed and finally settled herself down on a chair with a plate on pancakes in front of her. "But you sleep like a rock! Jesse said you wouldn't wake up, no matter how much she tried!"

"It was kinda scary," Jesse mumbled around a mouthful of pancake. "I thought you were dead." Lauren giggled at Jesse's flat tone, leading to her accidentally choking on her food.

"Well, now that Sleeping Beauty is awake, what're we doing today?" Mallory asked Sasha, who was scrolling absently on her phone. Carla felt her cheeks heat up at the nickname.

"I was thinking that we could wander around, see the sights! How does that sound?"

"Awesome!" Chris replied, the others nodding eagerly.

"Alright! But before we get going, I need everyone to help me clean up this pancake mess!" Sasha laughed, gesturing at the tower of dishes and splatters of batter on the kitchen counters.

The kids all nodded again, though not nearly as eager as before.

#

After everyone had finished their pancakes and worked together to clean up the kitchen, they spent the rest of the day exploring the busy streets of the city. While the other five seemed absolutely stunned by the size of the buildings and the huge crowds, Carla was barely fazed. She had lived in the city for the first twelve years of her life, so the trip was barely a new experience to her. Though after nine months of living in Sunflower Shores, Carla had to admit that the city had never looked more daunting.

"So did you live around here, Carla?" Lauren asked as the group strolled down a street that was bordered with apartment buildings. The braided girl had been gaping at the towering buildings with a look of wonder in her eyes, and her question made it sound like she thought Carla had lived in some sort of castle.

"Not anywhere near here," Carla laughed. It was such a large city, Carla was sure that she had never even been in the part of town that they were currently exploring. "I lived in some apartment near the bridge. It was small, but my parents really liked it. It was one of the highest rooms, and it had a nice view."

"Better than the outlook?" Mallory asked with a mischievous grin. Carla recalled the view from the apartment, during the days she spent by herself, sitting on the balcony and waiting for her father to come home, with only the distant city sounds to give her company. She then thought back to the first time she went to the outlook with Mallory, and how the moon had illuminated the crashing waves and Mallory's hair, waving slightly in the gentle breeze.

"No, I don't think so," Carla replied with a slight smile.

"So, do you have family still living here?" Sasha asked, slowing down enough so that she was walking beside Carla.

Carla hummed, pretending to think. "No." she said after a slight pause. Much to her relief, the conversation ended there.

#

They spent the whole day exploring the city, visiting parks and cafes, and wandering through stores and malls. As the sun started to set and the group had finished their meals at the restaurant where Sasha worked, Carla anticipated going back to the apartment. her feet were sore from all the walking, and she could tell that the others were also tired out. When they finally got back, Carla was looking forward to finally lying in bed and resting. What she was not looking forward to, however, was Jesse's nightly questioning.

"So why did you move to Sunflower Shores?" Jesse asked after five minutes of blissful silence.

Carla wanted to lie, to give Jesse some sort of ridiculous answer. But  she was too tired to come up with anything witty. "I'm sick. And the city had too many bad memories."

"About your mom?" Jesse asked. Carla turned to scowl at her.

"Yeah, but why do you know that?" She huffed. Every day she thought Jesse couldn't get more nosy. Every day she was proven wrong.

"You said earlier that you lived with your parents. But now you just live with your dad, right?"

Carla was silent.

"What happened to her?"

So nosy. "She died."

"Oh."

It was Jesse's turn to be silent. Carla would've liked to keep that silence, but it slowly became unbearable to her.

"She died when I was seven. She had a bad respiratory disease and she had an attack while I was school and my dad was working, and she had no one to help her." Carla paused. Usually, she'd feel bad about oversharing so much, but the words came out effortlessly. "We came home and found her. Dad wouldn't let me in the room to see her."

"Sorry." Jesse said quietly.

"It's okay, I don't..." She trailed off. "I don't remember her very well." She hummed and rolled onto her back. "But, well, when I was eleven, I got diagnosed with the same disease."

"Are you okay?" Jesse asked softly. The concern in her voice was obvious.

"Yeah, I've got it under control." She replied quickly. She didn't want Jesse to worry. "But yeah, we decided to move to Sunflower Shores after I got diagnosed. It's better there, the air's cleaner. Less stressful. And dad..." She paused. "He's happier there, I think." She thought about how he had dropped his job, his home, and left the place where he had grown up. Now that she thought about it, despite how hard the move must've been for her father, he seemed happier in their new home.

"Sorry," Jesse said once again. "I shouldn't have asked."

"It's okay," Carla replied. "I actually...don't think I've ever told anyone all that. besides, y'know, my dad. And the counselor." It felt nice, talking about it like this.

Jesse turned towards Carla, her eyes wide, "No one?"

"No. I didn't really...have any friends to talk to here." She replied with a yawn.

"Carla?"

"Hm?"

"Does that mean we're friends?"

Carla turned away from Jesse's wide-eyed stare. She was silent for a moment. "I guess so, yeah." She hummed. She had her back turned to her, but Carla could tell that Jesse was smiling.

[hamitome--imagines]

All the Letters You Wrote Me

* Laurens × shy!SchuylerSister!reader * Hamiltime * 179: I’ve never felt this way about anyone before…and it scares the shot out of me. * Requested by @fangirlwithasweettooth

A/N: ok since it’s early morning for me, it’s probably not night for anyone else. And for that I apologize. I added more to it then I originally planned. Also the title is misleading as it has almost nothing to do with letters. Oops. But it’s done and it’s up! Enjoy!

Word Count: 3,049

~~

“Come on Y/N!” You older sister Eliza urged. “You too Peggy!” She was currently dragging both of you through the town. Even though your dad specifically said not to go downtown.

“Daddy said to be home by sundown.” You tried.

“Daddy doesn’t need to know.” You older sister Angelica said from where she was leading the three of you.

“Daddy said not to go downtown.” Your little sister Peggy tried to say.

“Like I said, you’re free to go.” Eliza told her.

“But this will be much more fun.” Angelica said. You and Peggy weren’t very outgoing. Yes you loved spending time with your sisters but they were more personable. Peggy just didn’t want to do wrong. But you? You were very shy. When Angelica, Eliza, and eventually Peggy would be talking to people, you shut down and got quiet. They tried getting you to open up but it never worked. Though you could hold your own as well as your sisters.

“What you doing in the city in your fancy heels? You searching for an urchin you can give you ideals?” Burr asked your sister. You nose wrinkled up in annoyance.

“Burr your disgust me.” Angelica told him.

“Ah so you’ve discussed me?” He tried again. “I’m a trust fund baby, you can trust me.” All three of your sisters and you gave him a bewildered look. Angelica quickly shrugged him off.

You spent the rest of the day wandering the streets of downtown. It was a little fun, only the thrill of doing something you’re not supposed to. One thing you enjoyed about downtown was watching the guys. You weren’t brave enough to talk to any of them, but you could watch them. You got your attention captured by a man with curly hair pulled into a ponytail. You didn’t even realize you were staring at him.

“Go talk to him.” Eliza urged, suddenly coming up beside you.

“What? No, it’s fine.” You said, embarrassed someone caught you.

“You may never see him again and he could be the love of your life.” Eliza tried again.

“Or he could think I’m really weird for coming up to talk to him randomly. And if he’s the love of my life, I’m sure I’ll see him again. Now let’s head home. Dad will kill us if we miss curfew again.” You said, quickly changing the subject. — “I don’t want to go!” You whined. Your father had been invited to a ball and you and your sisters were going. Only you didn’t want to.

“Even I want to go.” Peggy said.

“Well you’re outgoing. I’m gonna spend the whole time by myself and not talking to anyone. That’s what happens when you’re shy.” You complained. You were stood in your room with Eliza and Peggy, both were trying to convince you that the Washington Winter Ball would be fun. You hated parties though. You always ended up along one of the walls alone and tried to be unnoticed. You didn’t enjoy being alone but you preferred it over talking to strangers.

“Then I’ll help you.” Angelica said, suddenly appearing. She starting looking through the gowns in your closet. “You’ll look absolutely stunning and I won’t leave your side until you’ve captivated some guy’s attention.”

“But I want you to enjoy the evening too.” You told her.

“Don’t worry Y/N. Once you get past hello it’s easy.” She told you.

“It doesn’t seem easy.” You grumbled.

“Here. Put this dress on.” Angelica ordered, holding out the mass of fabric. Your sister knew you too well. It was an elegant dress the fit you well. It was also very breathable and comfortable, which was always better when you were nervous. So you grabbed it from her and went about putting on all the layers. Angelica was already prepared for the ball so she spent the evening helping you get ready.

After getting dressed, she helped you with your hair. She pinned it up but allowed a few strands to hang loose and frame your face. Then she added some light make-up to enhance your features. “There.” She said as she finished and stepped back. “Stunning.” Then she shrugged. “But that’s no different than usual.”

“Thanks Angie.” You said with a smile.

“Anything for my little sis.” She responded. Peggy and Eliza ran into the room.

“Father is ready when ever we are.” Peggy announced. So you all climbed into a carriage together to go to Mount Vernon.

“So who else is excited to meet some soldiers?” Angelica started gushing.

“Seriously Angelica?” Eliza asked her with a slight laugh.

“Oh come on! You know that a majority of boys there tonight will be some soldiers. And there’s something about a guy in a uniform.” She said. You laughed at your eldest sister. However, she turned out to be right. Almost all of the men present were wearing blue coats, the sure sign of a soldier.

Peggy and Eliza flitted off almost immediately. “Aren’t you gonna run off to find a soldier?” You asked Angelica.

“Not until we find you one.” She said and slung her arm over your shoulders. Then Eliza found her way back over.

“Y/N, follow me.” She said and grabbed your arm. She led you through the crowd and came to a stop. “Look.” She said and pointed across the room. You looked and saw the man from downtown a few weeks back. He was much closer than before and you could see some freckles. His curls were pulled back into a slightly poofy pony tail. You could only stare.

The man laughed at something another man had said. He glanced around and noticed you staring. He gave you a crooked smile and a small wave. Your eyes widened and you cheeks went pink. You lifted your hand in a weak wave. He smiled wider and you quickly looked down at your shoes. “I think he likes you.” Angelica sing-songed.

“I think he was just being nice.” You mumbled.

“Hm…let’s find out.” Angelica said and left your side. You looked up to see her approaching the soldier. Your stomach twisted nervously as she started talking to him. He smiled and nodded at something. Then Angelica started walking back toward you.

“Nope. I can’t do it. I gotta go.” You mumbled to Eliza.

“Oh no. You’re staying here.” Eliza chided and held onto your wrist. You got more nervous being unable to run.

“These are my sisters. Eliza and Y/N.” Angelica said as she approached.

“And I need to go find Peggy.” Eliza said and scurried off.

The man looked confused but shrugged it off. “Well, pleasure to meet you Y/N.” The man said and held out a hand. You placed your hand in his, eyes cast downward. “I’m John Laurens.” He raised your hand to his lips to pressed a soft kiss to the back. You cheeks went pink once more. “Can you honor me with a dance?” He asked. You nodded mutely.

He smiled widely and led you to the dance floor. He spun you around and chattered nonsense for a while. Eventually you slowed to a stop as a song ended. “Am I boring you?” He asked.

“Huh?”

“Well, we’ve been dancing and I’ve been trying to talk but you haven’t said anything back.” He said with a shrug. “I can leave if you want.”

“No its not that!” You assured him. “I’m just really shy. I don’t really know what to say and I don’t really talk to strangers well but I really like dancing with you and your endless chatter was really funny and-”

“Y/N.” John said, getting your attention and cutting off your rambling with a smile. “Let’s keep dancing.” He offered. You smiled and let him continue to lead you through the steps. You danced with him most of the night. Whenever you needed a break, he’d stay to the side with you. You opened up a little bit through the night, but you were still too shy to say much.

The night was drawing to a close and John was still at your side. Angelica huffed as she came back over. “Well at least two of my baby sisters hooked up.” She said. You blushed. You and John weren’t any form of offical.

“Who’d Eliza find?” You asked having seen Peggy alone only a few minutes ago.

“His name is Alexander Hamilton.” She answered.

“Seriously? That’s the closest friend I got.” John said with a small laugh. “Imagine that.” He added, nudging you lightly. It pulled a small, shy smile from you.

Angelica looks between you two. “Ya know, Alexander is going to start writing Eliza. Are you going to be receiving any letters Y/N?” She asked, knowing the answer at this point is no.

“Oh well…I don’t know.” You mumbled but glared at her.

“Trust me, she opens up a lot more if she’s writing.” Angelica told John.

“And she is still standing here.” You quipped.

“Well in that case.” John turned to look at you. “Would she give me the honor of writing?” He asked, emphasizing it as a joke. One that made you smile. You nodded happily. — Angelica was right. You were more open over letters. You and John would have personal conversations, even if it was over paper. Even though you’ve met him once, you really cared for him. Writing letters took away the face to face. You couldn’t see his reactions so you didn’t fear it as much. Sure it wasn’t as intimate but it was still personal. You were finishing up your latest letter to him.

‘Reply as soon as you find the time.

I lo-’

You stilled. You couldn’t do that. You couldn’t admit that in a letter. You growled in annoyance.

-ng to see you again.

Your’s truly, Y/N’

You sighed as you stuffed the letter in an envelope. Angelica walked into the room. “I’ve never seen anyone so annoyed about writing to their lover.” She said.

“John Laurens isn’t my lover. We haven’t even said the L-word.” You said.

“Really?” Angelica asked.

“I want to say it but I can’t put it in a letter.” You sighed.

“Then you’ll need to tell him in person.” Angelica said with a shrug. “Now come on. Eliza needs some support right now. Alexander is asking father if he can marry her.”

So you and your sisters sat with Eliza, who was so anxious. She was anxious until Alexander came and found her with a large smile on his face. She laughed and ran forward as he wrapped her in a hug. — You smiled as you watched John and his friends tease Alexander. He came back over to you as Aaron Burr walked up to Alexander. John smiled at you and slung his arm over your shoulder. “Hey John?” You asked.

“Yeah?”

“Can we talk? Privately?” You asked meekly.

“Yeah, sure.” He said. He led you off to the corner of the room, away from all the party-goers. “What do you need?” He asked calmly.

“I need to talk to you.” You started trying to gain some courage. You were so nervous. This was way outside of your comfort zone.

“What’s wrong?” He asked. “Is this about…us?” He asked hesitantly.

“Yeah actually.” You said and he started looking worried. “Oh it’s not bad!” You said quickly.

“It’s not?”

“No. I don’t want to leave you, not at all. In fact I…” You paused again. You had to say it but you couldn’t. It wasn’t that you were scared but you definitely worried about John’s reaction. He noticed your anxiety and pulled you into hug. He ran his fingers through your hair.

“You can tell me anything. You know that.” John pulled back slightly and pressed a soft kiss to your forehead.

“I…” You took a step back and stared at your feet. “I love you.” You mumbled, apparently too quietly.

“You what?” John asked crouching down to try to catch your gaze.

You took a deep breath but refused to look up at John. You couldn’t stand to watch his reaction. “I love you.” You said again, a bit louder and more clear. John didn’t say anything so you cautiously looked up at him. He was smiling widely, beaming at you.

“I love you too.” He leaned closer but paused. “I uh…can I kiss you?” He asked cautiously. You smiled and nodded. He leaned down and pressed his lips softly to yours. He kissed you softly and sweetly. One arm was wrapped lightly around your waist. His other hand was pressing between your shoulder blades. You were gripping the front of his blue coat. He pulled back and stared at you with a smile. “You know, I wanted to tell you that I love you for a long time now. I just didn’t want to freak you out.”

“I wanted too also, but I couldn’t bring myself to tell you in a letter. So I had to do it in person.” You said. “Even though that was the scariest thing I’ve ever done.”

John leaned down to kiss you softly once more. “Well you did it. Now I can say I love you all I want.” He kissed you once again. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” You said with a small giggle. — The war was over. Alexander had been home for weeks. Lafayette and Hercules had even come over to check in with you and your sisters. None of them had heard from John since he left for South Carolina. You were a little worried, of course. War meant you could lose those you cared about. John had managed to find a new side of you, a more open side. You didn’t want to lose him or that side.

You were sat in your room, re-reading John’s letters to you. You had a small smile on your face as you read his sweet words to you. Then there was a knock on the door. Angelica stuck her head in. “Hey, dad wants you downstairs in the foyer.” She informed you.

So you left your room and headed for the stairs. You bounded down and went to the foyer. You froze as you rounded the corner and walked in. John stood there, patiently waiting with a small smile, a smile that grew when he saw you. You let out a small squeal and ran forward and jumped into his arms. He laughed with you as he lifted you and spun you around.

“You’re ok!” You exclaimed happily when he set you down.

“Of course. For you.” He said with a smile and followed by a short kiss. “And I have something I need to ask you.” He said.

“What would that be?” You inquired.

And John dropped to one knee and pulled a ring from his pocket and held it out to you. “You may be shy, but I got to know you. You were open to me and I think that means something. So, will you do me the honor of becoming me wife?”

You were shocked but didn’t hesitate to respond. “Yes!” — Dress? Check. It was beautiful and flattering. You felt gorgeous in it.

Bridesmaids? Check. Angelica was your maid of honor since she got you and John talking.

Groom? Check. That was the main thing, John was here and so we’re his groomsmen. Alexander was his best man.

The one thing not in check? Your nerves. It’s a wedding. It’s promising your life to another. If it were just you and John, you’d be fine. But it’s your entire family as well as John’s. There’s so many people watching. And it was nerve wracking.

Angelica poked her head in the room you were waiting in. “Ready?” She asked happily. You looked over at her and she must have noticed the fear in your features because she stepped inside the room. “What’s wrong?”

“I…I’m just so nervous. I love John, I really do. But I’m so scared of going up there and in front of everyone and saying my vows.” You admitted.

Angelica gave you a small smile. Her wedding was a few months ago. She walked closer and grabbed your hands. “Y/N, I promise you this. You feel so nervous just before those doors open. Then, your eyes will land on John and everything else will disappear. It will be just the two of you.” She pulled you into a quick hug. “Now go marry that solider of yours.”

So you stood with your father, anxious for the doors to open. You heard the organ begin the traditional wedding march then the heavy wooden doors were opened. The knot in your stomach tightened. Everyone was going stare at you and watch. Then you locked eyes with John through your veil.

His eyes were a bit misty but he was smiling. Everything else did, in fact, seem to disappear. John was all you could focus on. You blushed under his gaze and cast a glance down at your shoes. You took a deep breath and looked back up. He smiled widely at you once more. You stood in front on John, staring at him the whole time. You spoke when prompted and said your “I do’s”

“I now pronounce you Mr and Mrs John Laurens. You may kiss the bride.” The priest said. John smiled widely again. He leaned in and pressed a short kiss to your lips. He pulled back slightly and gazed at you.

“I love you John Laurens.” You whispered, as quiet as you had said it the first time, but much more confidently this time. However, now he was close enough to hear and smiled.

“I love you too Y/N Laurens.” He said, using your shared last name for the first time. You smiled as you heard it. The organ started playing, breaking you and John from your mentally created solitude. You turned and walked out of the chapel, arms hooked together. You had changed so much with John at your side. There were still times you were shy and quiet but John was beside you, now and forever. You had nothing to be shy about with him at your side.

[eyez-ff-blog]

○○ eyez | twenty-eight

February 14, 2017

“Jermaine Cole,” A rhythmic beat was being made against his wall. “Aye, Jermaine Cole. Wake yo ass up—Jermaine Cole,” He huffed slightly before he pulled the pillow from under his head, tossing it at the sound of the voice. “That’s why you missed!”

“A short list of things I don’t miss—you waking my ass up,” He mumbled from under the covers. “Get out, Ibrahim. Let me get ready,” He chuckled lowly.

“Alright, hurry up. We gotta go to the store,” Ib closed the door to his bedroom, and J slowly slid out of bed before he scratched against the side of his face. He got out of bed before grabbing his pillow, putting it back on the bed before he made his way over to the bathroom.

After relieving himself and taking a shower, he got dried off before putting on some deodorant and lotion. He put on his boxers and a tank before putting on a t-shirt and a pair of sweats, sliding on a pair of socks and his sneakers before grabbing a jacket and sliding it on. He grabbed his keys and things before he came out of the room.

“Ah, the sleepy head is up!” Nicole announced as he entered the kitchen where she and Beija’s friend Lauren were cooking and preparing the meal. “Ib went to use the restroom but he should be out,” She said.

“Right. Thanks—how y’all doing by the way?” He gave Nicole a quick hug and then went to Lauren next before glancing over at Beija who was sitting at the kitchen island. “And how’s my big mama?” He smiled before he walked over to her and kissed her forehead.

“We’re good, just trying to get everything together,” Beija handed J a list of things, and he read over them. “Make sure they got the cake right before bringing it home, okay? And don’t be too long—we only have four hours left to get it all done,” She nodded.

Jermaine looked over the list quickly before he nodded, stuffing the list into his jacket pocket. “It’s all good! I got you,” He looked back as he heard Ib enter the kitchen, and he saluted. “I’ll see y’all later,” He said before the two men headed out of the house. They decided to take Ibrahim’s rented car to run the errands. “Okay so—who all coming?” He asked.

“I know Cody and Bas are here, they came on the flight with me,” Ib said as he drove, keeping his eyes on the road. “Dame just touched down and got off the plane, and Court said she just hit the state line on the bus,” He explained. “Zeus and Whitney are here too, I think they came in last night,” He added.

“Damn, whole family’s here,” J ran his hand over the top of his head. “That’s wassup. But thanks for coming in early with Nic and helping out, man. I know Beija been stressing to make sure this party was nice,” He explained.

“You always thank me and I always tell you the same thing—we got you,” Ib grinned. “And you know I’m not missing out on my niece or nephew’s shower. Must be crazy,” He chuckled. “But yo, I meant to ask you...have you spoke to Mel lately? I saw her about a week ago.”

“Last time we talked was when the album dropped. I’m through with that,” J furrowed his eyebrows as he thought about the last time he spoke to Melissa, frowning softly as he shook his head slowly. “She was on some other shit, so I’m cool off of her,” He relaxed in his seat.

“Really? What happened?” Ib asked.

“She calls me at like four in the morning—drunk as fuck,” J began, and a soft groan escaped from Ib’s lips. “She’s hollerin’ at me and shit, calling B all types of bitches and shit. I wasn’t with it,” He explained. “I mean I get it; she’s mad about this shit with me and B but like...fuck she gon’ do about it now? I apologized, I recognized my wrongs. I’m not about to be in this endless cycle of trying to feel guilty and kiss her ass. I got bigger shit to worry about,” He rubbed the side of his head before Ib pulled up to the traffic light, stopping for the moment.

“I feel you. It was weird. Like we talked but she seemed distant and shit. She didn’t even ask about you, it was weird,” Ib shook his head slowly. “It’s too bad, but we gotta move forward,” He decided.

“Exactly. I’m not worried about it. If it ain’t affecting my family I really could give a fuck right about now,” J cleared his throat when he finished.

“Man, I still can’t believe you’re about to be a father. Like, it blows my mind. The Jermaine I knew back in the day would be still trying to run from the shit,” Ib chuckled. “But I guess B got you locked the fuck down.”

“Shit changes, man. Sometimes you gotta realize what you got and play the game accordingly. I was gonna settle down eventually. I just had to accept my role,” J chuckled.

“My son is growing up! I’m too impressed,” Ib fake cried, and J sucked his teeth before the two of them began to laugh.

The boys first went to get the catered food that would go alongside what Nicole and Lauren were cooking—then they went to pick up the cake. They went to the party store to get more supplies and utensils, and lastly they went to get the balloon that held the answer to the biggest question of the day: the baby’s gender.

Kay had been such a big help with the gender reveal as well; she had taken Beija to her second trimester update, and once the gender was revealed to her, Kay worked in secret to decorate the nursery. Beija was pretty much out of the loop when it came to the planning of the party and how things would go. Her ideas were given to Lauren, Nicole, and Kay, and the three of them worked hard to get the party together and composed the invite list of Jermaine and Beija’s closest.

Once the boys got back to the house, Jermaine headed to the bedroom to get himself officially ready for the party. He saw Beija in the bedroom as she shuffled through some of her outfit options, and he closed the door behind him. “Baby, do you really think I should do the lavender dress? I’m gonna look like a tube of paint or something,” She complained.

J laughed a bit before he shook his head. “You’re not. It looked nice when you showed it to me at the store. Here,” He walked over and attempted to help her into the dress.

The dress was a scrunchy style, and with the help of her strapless bra, her breasts were somewhat under control. The dress fitted loosely and showed off her large bump. “It’s not that bad, huh?” She asked, and he shook his head.

“You’re cute, baby. Glowing ass,” He laughed as he kissed the side of her face. “You gonna put on your make-up or whatever?” He asked.

“Hm...I am, actually. I wanna be cute today,” She smiled as she walked over to her vanity and took a seat. She put on a smock to cover up her dress, and started on priming her face. “Let me see what you’re gonna put on,” She requested.

Jermaine went into the closet before he took out a pair of jeans and grabbed the lavender colored polo that Beija had bought for the occasion. He changed out of his clothes and into those before sliding on a pair of white sneakers to compliment the outfit. He dusted himself a bit before he turned to face Beija, who was looking at him through the mirror as she added foundation to her face. “Yes! You look so nice,” She complimented.

He nodded as he sprayed a bit of cologne on him, and took one last look at himself. He hadn’t worn such a combination of clothes since he was younger, and he had to chuckle a bit. “I’m getting the fuck fat. Beer belly out of control,” He patted his stomach.

“You’re still kinda small,” She laughed a bit as he looked back, watching her carefully start to work on her eye make-up. “Go on outside and go make sure everything is right, please?” She asked.

“Got you. Take your time, we still have a bit of time left,” He reminded her before he headed out of the door.

Before long, the shower began and the house was filled with individuals, from Jermaine and Beija’s family and friends to their label family and some of their neighbors. The event seemed to roll smoothly and the house looked beautifully decorated, from the lilac and lavender decorations, to the slideshow of Jermaine and Beija as children playing on their TV screen and other small details that made the party especially personal and sentimental even amongst all the usual games and jest.

The food was absolutely delicious as well—alongside the catered chicken wings, Nicole had made her ‘famous’ spaghetti with Caesar salad, and Lauren had made some finger foods that people could munch on. For sweets, they had a bakery make a full sized vanilla cake, with assorted vanilla and chocolate cupcakes.

It was getting close to the end of the party, and there were still the gifts and the gender reveal, so while Beija opened up the multitude of unisex clothes, diapers, wipes, and other items, J took care of the registry and the list of who gave what while the photographer they hired took photos. The last person to go as far as a gift was Kay, but that meant it was time for the gender reveal.

“Okay baby, we got one more gift but before that—everyone let’s head outside,” J helped Beija off of the couch and led her outside with everyone else.

The crowd of people hung about at the end of the driveway while Jermaine and Beija stood near the garage, and soon enough Ib and Nicole brought out the large balloon that would reveal the gender. “Okay this is how it’s gonna go; there’s either blue or pink confetti inside of this balloon. We all know what that should mean, yeah? Cool,” Ib laughed softly as he walked over and climbed up on the small ladder that stood near the couple of honor.

Jermaine stood in front of Beija and took her hands, looking down at her with a small chuckle. “You ready, B?” He asked.

“Mhm, let’s do it,” Beija chuckled.

“On the count of three, we’re gonna pop the balloon,” Nicole called out.

“1! 2! 3!”

Suddenly, the popping of the balloon sounded in Jermaine’s ears, and he watched as pink confetti fell over he and Beija, his eyes widening as the partygoers cheered in excitement. His heart seemed to skip a beat as he squeezed B’s hands, the realization coming over him almost immediately; he was going to have a daughter. He wouldn’t have cared no matter what—he was just excited and within the moment he felt this surge of undeniable happiness.

“Congratulations!” Kay finally stepped forward, smiling wide as she hugged Jermaine first, then Beija. “Now that you know the gender, I can show you my gift. Come on,” She took Beija’s hand and she led her back inside with Jermaine close behind.

The three headed down the hallway before they got to the door to the nursery. Beija quickly went to open the door, and Jermaine entered behind her to take a look around. “Wow...” He mumbled as he looked around at the soft touches to the room, and how feminine and elegant the room felt. Even the crib and changing table seemed to give off this sense of style, and Jermaine smiled softly. “Mama, this is beautiful,” He complimented.

“Thank you. I know how stylish Beija is and I wanted a room to reflect that—I wanted my granddaughter to feel just as stylish,” Kay commented, and Beija turned to hug her tightly.

“I love it, mommy. Thank you so much,” J smiled a bit as he watched them embrace, and he bit into his lip as they left the room and allowed some of the partygoers to also get a look at the finished nursery.

Soon enough, everyone was back in the living room where they were congregating and talking amongst themselves. Soon enough Beija cleared her throat before raising her hand. “Hey, guys, I just wanted to say something,” She said, and the room quieted down before all eyes were on her. Jermaine glanced over at her as she took his hand, smiling a bit as she began to speak. “I just wanted to thank you all for coming. You all came from a long way to be here with us today and it personally means so much, considering everything. This has been...the happiest time of my life, and I’m happy that I could share this day with you all,” She smiled as everyone applauded and shared their well wishes.

“Hey uh,” Jermaine spoke up before he rubbed at Beija’s knuckles briefly. “I would like to say something too. If y’all don’t mind of course,” He said, and everyone grew silent again. “Today’s been a real proud day for me. Got to share a dope memory with my family and friends...and this incredible woman,” He glanced over at Beija before chuckling to himself. “Today’s not just a big day for our family, but today was the day I finally made Beija my girl. One year ago I had gathered the courage and she was brave enough to deal with me.” Some of the partygoers began to chuckle. “Despite all that, she’s been my friend for two interesting years. We’ve had highs and lows and here we are, stronger than ever before. I’m so lucky...I’m so blessed to be in love with my best friend,” He nodded, and he smiled a bit as he kept his eyes on Beija.

“Baby...you’re beyond words. I can’t begin to tell you how much you’ve changed me and made me want to be a better man. From the night I met you, I knew you were unlike anything I had ever experienced and you’ve done nothing but prove to me that God is real. I always questioned it...I don’t question it anymore,” Jermaine cleared his throat as he licked over his lips, feeling an odd wave of emotions overtake him. “When I look at you, I see God’s beauty. When I hear you speak, I hear God’s wisdom. When we touch I feel God’s grace. And our daughter...” He looked down and bit his lip. He had to get through what he had to say. He heard some encouragement from some of the males in the room, and he looked back up at Beija, who was on the verge of tears. “Our daughter is our greatest blessing. She’ll be our lifelong reminder of the love we found. God is real...He lives inside of you, Beija,” He slowly pulled himself off the couch, and he kneeled down in front of her, causing the crowd to surge with excitement and anticipation.

Beija quietly sobbed as she covered her mouth. “Jermaine,” He heard her mumbled.

“Baby...I can’t go another day without making this what it’s supposed to be. I know for a fact that you’re my forever. I had been contemplating if I deserved a second chance at this, and I know now that you did not come to me by accident. So I’m here today to give you my greatest and most humble gift—myself. My life, my love...it belongs to you and our daughter,” His voice quivered as he pulled the black velvet box out of his pocket and opened it. The ring was on a four prong setting, with a .9 carat center diamond, and two diamonds on the side. The ring sparkled brightly in the light, and the look on Beija’s face was exactly as he expected. “So what do you say, huh? Will you—...”

“Yes! Yes, Jermaine!” Beija didn’t even let him finish, and she wrapped her arms around him before hugging him tightly. He let out the deepest breath as he heard everyone cheering and applauding for them. He pulled back and slid the ring onto her finger. Despite the fact that her fingers were a bit thicker from pregnancy, he knew he had picked the right size. He looked up at her and wiped her tears before kissing her slowly. “I—I love you,” She smiled as she hugged him again.

“I love you more,” He hugged her back as he rubbed her back. He felt this surge of warmth again, and he knew he was making the right choice. There was no way that this could be wrong. Before long, he would not only be a father, but finally giving himself and Beija the chance to have a true union.

[wolfiesdiary-blog]

couple’s interview

Apparently the next part of your interviews are going to be done together, that's fun right? Hi guys.

Niykee: If you're gonna test me on how well I know him and ask me something like what his subway order is, the answer is that I can hardly even remember my own order most of the time. Wolfgang: I don't even eat subway! 

I won't test you on that, I guess. let's just jump right in. How did you two meet? Did you like each other right off the bat or was the attraction more of a gradual thing?

W: She didn't even want me at first, we both almost gave up on each other. N: I certainly didn't want to want him. but once the attraction happened it was pretty instant, I think. we set out to be friends and it didn't take long before I was like 'damn, I like him a lot'

You thought you'd be just friends, hm? Are you each other's best friends?

W: [turns to look at her] Am I your best friend, babe? I think her best friend is Lauren. N: Yes, baby, she is. But I've always been pretty introverted and didn't have many close friends and if a best friend is what I think it is then he's definitely my best friend now, too. He's the only person I wanna hangout with 99% of the time and he knows everything about me. Am i your best friend? W: I've always considered Dave to be my best friend, but since I got to know you, you've definitely stolen that title from him. I didn't expect that we would bond like we did. N: I hope dave watches this interview and gets jealous W laughs

That's sweet. Poor Dave. When did you first realize that you had fallen in love and how did you feel about it? 

W: One day I almost told her I loved her and then I stopped myself before I could say it, thought it was too soon. Then I decided to just fuck it and say it anyway. I told her that I loved that and that she didn't have to love me back, I just wanted her to know. N: I think when he told me he loved me was when it first really started to set in that I was in love. But I have moments all the time where I'm like damn, I'm really this in love. I remember feeling scared and excited and happy, I still feel all of those things but I'm less scared now. 

Do your families approve of your relationship? What do your friends think about it? What about your fans? Niykee, i know your fans are protective. 

N: I'm not too close with my family and I haven't seen them in awhile, so they haven't got to meet him yet, I know I'll have to swallow my pride and go home and introduce them soon. I've always considered my managers family to be my family, and they love him. her dad is so happy to finally have another man to hangout with when his house is full of all of us girls. My fans are protective, they're my babies. They just want me to be happy and they can tell that I am. They'll probably kill him if he hurts me, but as long as he's making me happy, they love him. W: [scratching his chin] I don't really have family here. My friends are all friends with her too, so they approve. She has a lot more fans than I do and they recently heard about us and they've been following me on social media, so far I haven't seen any hate and I hope it continues that way. 

That's good. Fans can be pretty unruly about their favourites’ significant others. Do you feel like your partner accepts you completely? 

W: I definitely do, yes N: Absolutely. I've never felt more accepted. 

That's great! Do you think you’ll still be together when you’re old, or even forever? 

N: We better be. at this point I don't think i could be happy without him. If I'm gonna be with anyone forever I want it to be him.  W: I hope so, I hope she doesn't get tired of me N: I'm never gonna get tired of you, babe.  W reaches to squeeze her hand.

Usually I'd say never say never but you seem pretty certain. 

N: I’m very certain. 

I hope you're right. The next few questions might be a bit tougher. Who do you feel has made more personal sacrifices in this relationship? 

W: [pointing to her] Probably Niykee. N: You think so? W: I feel like you've only been staying in LA because of me N: I mean, once I'm done recording my album here it'll be just because of you. but it doesn't feel like a sacrifice. I get to be with you. 

As long as you feel like it's worth it, that's what's important. Do you have any problems, concerns, comments, or issues about your partner's previous partners? 

W: I would like to public--- publicly, that's a tough word. [laughs] I'd like to publicly thank Niykee's exes for letting her go. N: You’re so cute. I don't think Wolfie has any serious exes and none of mine were really serious either but even if he had a hundred I wouldn't be concerned. He's mine now and that's all I care about. 

Tell me about a time that your relationship was put to the test?

W: [turns to look at her] Do you wanna answer that? I can't really remember any, except the very beginning, I guess. N: Hm, we haven't really had many issues. I guess if I had to say something it'd just be both of our resistance in the beginning. I don't think either of us were planning on having feelings for each other. and I was kinda getting to know someone else at the time and I guess had to decide which one of them I really wanted to pursue. I made the right choice. W: You have to say that N: I wouldn't say it if it wasn't true. He's was a great guy but I don't think anyone would make me as happy as I am with you. 

I'm glad things worked out. Do you feel as though your partner tends to drudge up resentments during arguments? 

W: We don't really have arguments. Sometimes she might be stressed about something and she doesn't want to bother me but I annoy her anyway until we've talked about everything. N: He definitely doesn't, no. 

Do you think hes holding onto anything and just not saying anything? Do you think she is? 

N: Nah, if he had any resentment or anything he'd tell me. He's pretty open. W: I feel like she'd tell me too. N: I would

Do you think your partner trusts you? 

W: [nods] I think so. N: Yes, i think he does.

What's been the biggest gesture your partner has done for you to date?

W: Probably flying me across the world to see her. N: Uh, he likes to take me away for the weekend when I'm sad or stressed. He also drops his work and his life and comes to visit me when I'm on tour and that's pretty big because I know he's busy. 

Has there ever been a time where you felt your partner was lying? When was it?

N: Not that i can think of. I've never really felt like he was being dishonest. W: I have never felt like she was lying either

I know you already said that you don't argue much but what happens when you do? How do you make up? 

W: I annoy her until we're okay. [laughs] N: Even if we argue, i can never really be mad at him so we've never had to make up. 

When was the last time you two talked about your future together? Were you two on the same page? 

W: Two days ago, I wanna say, we're thinking about moving in together. 

Wow, that's big! 

N: It is, yeah. but I think we're on the same page. I think it'll be good for us. We spend every night together anyway. 

What's one thing that everyone needs to know about your partner? How about your relationship? 

W: She's the most passionate person I know, with everything in our lives. She's passionate about her fans, about making a different in other people's lives, about her music. Everything you see on stage is completely true. As for our relationship, it's just us being huge nerds and me killing spiders for her. N: That despite being big and tough he's the sweetest man in the world. He's so good to me, so patient and understanding even when I'm being difficult. I don't think anyone needs to know anything about our relationship, we know what we need to know, but I hope my fans know that we're happy and that he's the greatest man I've ever met. 

That's so sweet. If you could do anything for your partner what would you do?

W: Uh, whatever she wants or needs me to do. I'd go around the world and back for her. N: Whatever i want, huh? I'd do anything for him. I think moving to California for good is probably the next big thing i'm gonna do for him. W: Whatever you want. N: Thank you, baby. 

My last question is what do you hope for the future of your relationship?

W: The whole deal, marriage, kids... 

Wow, really? 

N: I just want to continue making him as happy as possible. I wanna be his wife one day, i want a mini Wolfie. 

[Wolfies leans in to kiss her for the camera]

[corrahdarling]

Playing With Fire-- Ch. 17-- Dinner With a Side of Diamonds

Oh my God. Delete delete delete! 

Screw the rules. She knew that she would be up a creek without a paddle, if Tom knew that she had read this text from Henry. She would take that chance, though, this time. Wait a minute... what the hell did Henry mean by that? What did he know about Tom that she needed to know? Henry's probably just bull-shitting her... wanting to give her a reason to talk to him. Whatever he had against Tom probably wasn't even true! Right? She swiped her finger across his message, and as quickly as she could, she hit that red delete button. What had she just done?

Firstly, she wasn't even supposed to talk to Henry... text Henry... think about Henry... nothing. Secondly, she sure as hell wasn't supposed to meet him secretly at the same party she was going to with Tom. Talk about suicide! She'd have to avoid Henry at the party at all costs. She'd refuse to go, if she thought Tom would go for that, but she knew better.

She nearly jumped out of her skin when a knock sounded from the door. "Darling? Everything okay in here?" Tom stuck his gorgeous, deep blonde head through the open door.

"Oh... I'm fine. I'm sorry, sir." She realized that she had been standing in the same spot for far too long thinking about Henry, and also her family situation. How was she going to tell them everything?

"I was just checking on you. You haven't had your shower yet?" He looked down to the phone in her hand. "Did someone text you, love?"He asked, as he crossed his arms and leaned up against the doorframe.

"Oh... uh, no, sir... I was about to get into the shower and I thought I heard something. I thought it might be a text from my mom about the cookout... turns out I'm hearing things!"

"Hm... okay, then. You hop into the shower, I'm going to cook us some dinner. Hurry down when you're done."

"Yes, sir. I sure will."

FUCK.

She quickly jumped into the shower, washed her hair and scrubbed her face. Calm down, Hunter. There's no way that Tom will find out about that text... she certainly wasn't going to tell him this time. Nope.

She dressed, and ran her brush through her thick, auburn hair. She reapplied a bit of makeup... just enough to brighten her skin, and skipped down the stairs. Her mission to find Tom ended when she rounded the corner of the kitchen. Sometimes this man took her breath away... without the use of a belt. There, he stood, bare-chested, with a pair of amazingly-thin, heather grey Ralph Lauren lounge pants on. The pants sat low on his hips, and she could tell that he wore nothing underneath; and as amazing as he looked from the back, she knew he looked twice as amazing from the front. It looked like he had taken a quick shower too, as his hair looked wet, and she could smell his freshly applied Tom Ford cologne woven in between the scent of the meal he was cooking... mmm... divine.

She crept up behind him, wrapped her arms around his waist, and placed a light kiss on his shoulder.

"Mmm... there you are, my love. I was beginning to think that you'd gone down the drain!"

She giggled as he turned around and pulled her against his chest. "What are you cooking, sir?"

"We are having basil chicken over angel hair pasta... my specialty..."

"You have a lot of 'specialties', sir."

He snickered and kissed her forehead. "That I do, love."

"Mmm... it smells amazing! But, um, Sir? Is that pasta on our healthy food list?” She put her hands up defensively. “I'm not talking back, I'm just wondering."

"Well, it's whole wheat pasta, so yes, it's on our list." He smiled down at her. "You know what else is amazing, sweetheart?"

"What, sir?"


"The way you look right now." He ran his long fingers through her wet hair, before stopping to run his thumb across her cheekbone. "I'm such a lucky man. Don't ever doubt that I love you for one moment, darling."

"I love you too, sir." Her heart raced being this close to Tom... the scent of his skin- woodsy, with a hint of vanilla and tobacco... the closeness- she never felt him hold her as he was now... his words- she felt lucky too.

His hand trailed from her face, down to stroke the side of her neck. "Are you okay? From earlier, I mean? I was worried about you..."

"Yes, I'm okay, sir. Great, in fact." She gave him a reassuring smile. She knew he was concerned about the breath thing. They had discussed breath play at the very beginning of their relationship, and she had told him that she'd like to try it... and as scary as the belt around her neck was, him having that control over her gave her such a rush. It was like nothing else. "Can I help you with dinner?"

"No, darling, it's almost finished. You can, however, pour us a couple glasses of wine."

She nodded and pulled two gorgeous crystal, stemless wine glasses from the cabinet, and went to the refrigerated wine rack in the island. After looking over the assortment of wines, all with labels in a language that she couldn't understand, she finally decided to ask for advice.

"Sir? Which one should I get out? I don't know the differences in these..."

"Get the one that says Domaine de la Romanee Conti Montrachet... It's the one in the pear-colored bottle. I purchased it while I was in France, and I've been saving it for a very special occasion." He winked at her.

She pulled the chilled bottle from the rack, and very carefully placed it on the white granite countertop. It sounded expensive, and she did not want to be the one to break it. "So, what's the occasion special enough to warrant opening this?"

He turned from the stove, beaming. "I love you, it's as simple as that. It can't get much more special to me, love."

There you go, Hunter. Fall a little deeper... damn this man.

"Come, let's eat." He carried the plates, and flatware, while Hunter carried the glasses and wine, and followed. "Let's dine in the nook tonight. I want to be close to you... and that dining room is much too formal."

Hunter hadn't paid much attention to the little nook that was off of Tom's kitchen, but immediately fell in love with the little charming space. Built in bench seating was crafted along the walls, and above the benches, beautifully crafted windows spanned to the ceiling. A large industrial style chandelier hung over the table that illuminated the small space perfectly. Fluffy blue pillows accented the benches, making it look even more cozy.

She slid across the charcoal colored seat cushion, after he held out his hand for her to go first. He placed their plates in place and he slid in right behind her, sitting so close that his muscular thigh touched hers.

He uncorked the wine, and poured a bit in both of their glasses. "So, what should we toast to, darling?"

"Hmm... to happiness, sir?"

"We already have happiness, love... how about to new beginnings?"

She giggled. "Okay, that works too."

Their crystal glasses clinked before he pulled her deep into a kiss that was so full of passion and intensity, she thought she might combust into flames right there...

"Cheers, my love."

"Cheers, sir." She took a sip of her wine... okay, a huge gulp of wine. She didn't know what was going on, but she liked this side of him. He had two very different facets of himself, and she loved seeing this one.

They ate their dinner, and drank their wine... laughing and talking the entire time. She felt closer to him now, than she ever had before... and all they had to do was sit and enjoy dinner together.

"Sir, that was amazing. Thank you. Now, I'll clean off the table, and do the dishes." She began to slide out of the other side of the nook bench.

"Wait, Hunter. I want to talk to you."

"Oh... haven't we been talking?"

"Well... yes... but..."

He seemed nervous, which was not like him. He always absolutely oozed confidence... something must be wrong.

Warily, she asked. "What's wrong?"

He laughed. "Nothing, darling. Nothing is wrong."

She raised her eyebrows, urging for him to continue.

"How do you like staying here... at my house? You know I'm positively desperate for you to move in here. I love being near you..."

"I know, sir. I'm coming around to the idea... maybe soon I can stay here more, and eventually completely move in..."

He nodded. "Hunter, I love you. That hasn't happened to me in a very long time... well, ever, actually. I feel complete with you. I always knew it would take a very special woman to keep me happy. To put up with my... quirks. And yet, here you are... right in front of me."

"I love you too. I'm not planning on going anywhere, sir. I promise."

She watched the Adam's apple bounce in his neck as he took one last large gulp of the wine, slid off of the end of the bench... and onto one knee.

Oh my God... what the hell is happening.

"Hunter... I will forever be awestruck by you- your beauty, your heart... you inspire me every single day, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you... please do me the honor... marry me."

"Oh my God... Tom. But, I'm still..."

"I know, I know... you're still married. But, once that's final, you'll be all mine."

"...and my family doesn't know..."

"Well, we can remedy that next weekend when we go to Texas, can't we?"

"... but you work with Henry, that will be so awkward..."

He laughed. "Darling... it will be no more awkward than it already is." He huffed. "Look, Hunter, you keep giving me reasons that it wouldn't work... but you love me, and I love you. Isn't that reason enough to say yes?"

He pulled a tiny blue Tiffany's box from his pocket. How had she not seen that? When he opened it, she was faced with the biggest, shiniest ring she had ever seen. A large, round solitaire diamond sat in the center of a thick rose gold band. It was beautiful, huge, and absolutely perfect.

"Well? What do you say? I swear, I'll have a heart attack if my nerves get any worse."

Tears began to well in her eyes. "Tom, I..."

His eyebrows knitted together, as he silently willed her to say yes... but deep in his heart, he knew the answer.

She looked at the ring, and back up into Tom's glistening eyes. She wanted to marry him, and in a perfect world this would be so simple. You find a man that you love... that makes you happy... you get married, make a home, and live happily-ever-after. This, however, wasn't a perfect world. This was Hunter's life... and it was completely fucked up.

"Darling? Please say yes."

"Tom, I... I can't. Not yet, anyway. I love you... I do... so much, but I've got too much to deal with before we could get engaged. Please... I just need a little more time."

"Time..." His voice was full of resentment as he rose up from his kneeling position. "That's what you need..."

"Yes, sir. Please. I would love nothing more than to marry you... but I can't accept that beautiful ring while I'm married to someone else. I accepted this beautiful necklace... so, we are committed, right? Tom, I need to do this right... I don't want to fuck up another relationship like I did with Henry."

He nodded as he snapped the ring box closed hastily. "Watch your language. I thought I told you that."

She didn't know if it was the word 'fuck' or 'Henry' that he was mad about. "I'm sorry, sir. I wasn't thinking..."

He sat down on the bench beside her and hid his face in his hands in frustration. "Hunter, I'm so afraid that you are going to go back to Henry. I can't take this anymore... knowing that you are still bound to him. I can be this dominating man all day long, but I’ve come to realize that my feelings are as valid as anyone else’s. I love you... I want to marry you, but I can't because you're still bloody married. Tell me... what am I supposed to do, darling?"

Tears began to flow down Hunter's face. She felt horrible. "I just need time... I will talk to Henry, if you'll let me... and tell him to send me the divorce papers. All I have to do is sign them, right?"

"Yes, Hunter. I doubt he's going to do that, because he doesn't want to let you go, and he had no problem telling me that."

"He told you that? When?"

He sounded exasperated. "I called him into my office Friday. I asked him why he hadn't sent you the papers, and I explained to him that you were ready to move on with your life... with me. He basically told me to bugger off. I had to hold my composure because I was at work, but all I wanted to do was beat his ass. He still has your pictures all over his office, for fuck's sake. God, Hunter... I want to kill him. If I could get away with it, I would."

"Don't say that, sir, please. You don't mean that."

He smiled, but underneath, she knew he was pained. "I was a bit presumptuous when I picked this ring out for you. We were at Tiffany's. I had noticed that you had taken Henry's wedding ring off that morning... I thought you were ready to move on. You didn't know, but I purchased it there on the spot while you were browsing. I just knew that one day soon I'd slip it on your finger." His head hung even lower for a moment, seemingly defeated, before he stood and began to walk away. "Hunter, I'll wait on you. But, I need for this divorce to happen. Soon. Then, maybe, I can have you completely... the way I want."

She opened her mouth to speak, but as soon as she did, her phone sounded loudly from the living room.

He could see her body stiffen at the sudden ding, and he narrowed his eyes at her. "I'll get that for you, darling."

Shit, shit, shit. She hoped it wasn't Henry again. This would be the absolute worst timing ever.

He walked into the kitchen, and handed over her phone. "Well, it's your mum. She wants to know what kind of dessert you want at the cookout. You may text her back, but then you need to get up to bed."

Thank you, sweet baby Jesus.

"Yes, sir. Thank you."

He nodded and disappeared into the living room. She knew that he was probably humiliated since she had rejected his proposal, but she just couldn't do it... she needed Henry out of her life first, and she wished that Tom understood that. He couldn't stand not having control of every single facet of his life... which now included her life, as well. She swiped her phone, to reply to her mom...

8:48 P.M.

I don't care, mama. It's your party.

We'll have whatever dessert you

and Mike want.

-Hunter

8:51 P.M .

Well, ask Henry what he wants, then. Does he

still like my pecan pie?

-Mama

And, that's the end of that conversation for the night. Her family had no idea just how upside down her life really was at the moment, and it was getting harder and harder to hide it all the time. Right now, she didn't want to talk about pecan pie. Hunter decided that she might have to go against some of Tom's rules to get what she wanted. Her fingers slid across her phone to begin a text message... but it wasn't a reply to her mom.

8:57 P.M .

Henry... I've never asked you for much.

In fact, I've never really asked you for

anything. But, I am begging you with

every fiber of my being to please send me

the divorce papers. I'm tired, and I just

want it to be over with... Please .

If you ever truly loved me, you'll

do that for me .

-H

8:59 P.M .

No.

-Henry

9:00 P.M.

Why not? You can't want all

this drama anymore than I do .

I want to move on .

I do.

-H

9:02 P.M.

Does Tom know you're texting me? I know he's

got a tight leash on you. The last time that I texted

you to try and get you to come home, he called

me and threatened to kill me if I didn't stay away

from you. He said that you were his now. You're

right, I don't want this drama. I want you. I want 

you to come home. I want us to be together, and be 

happy, and I don't want you to have anything to

do with him. You don't know what you're

getting into with Tom. I need to tell you some 

things, Hunter. Please.

-Henry

9:06 P.M.

If you've got something that important to

tell me, then tell me now.

-H

She supposed that if Henry really did have something that he needed to tell her, she needed to hear it before accepting that ring from Tom.

9:08 P.M.

I won't tell you in a text message. I have

something that I need to show you. Meet me

somewhere. Anywhere. I'm begging you, Hunter.

Please don't make a huge mistake.

-Henry

What the hell was she thinking? Now, Henry's talking about meeting her somewhere to talk... oh God, that's so against the rules... in fact, she broke the rules minutes ago, and she just kept on. She was going to be in so much trouble, but she hoped the end result would make up for it.

9:10 P.M .

No, Henry. I can't meet you. You know that.

-H

9:12 P.M.

Yeah, I wouldn't want you to get into trouble, now

would I? This is bullshit, Hunter. You know that I love you .

I always will. I'm looking out for you, and you are just brushing me off. Forget it, I'll just see you at the party this weekend.

-Henry

Hunter deleted the messages, and tossed her phone across the table, making it loudly skid across the wood. He infuriated her! She shrieked when Tom came back around the corner, startling her. He had obviously been reading, because he still wore his glasses.

"What are you still doing up? I told you to be getting to bed."

"I'm sorry, sir. I was talking to my mom... and then I was going to clean off the table and wash the dishes."

"Hmm... well, I was in the living room, and heard you toss your phone across the table. She must have made you very angry, hmm? And Duncan will clean our dishes and make sure the house is in order, that's part of his job."

"Oh, no sir. I don't want him to have to clean up after us. I'll be more than happy to do it..."

He made it across the space between them with two bounds from his long legs, before quickly weaving his fingers through her still-damp hair. He pulled her head back sharply and painfully, and bent down to look into her eyes. His jaw was clenched, and he was breathing heavily through his nose... he was livid. "I said... get... the... fuck... to... bed. I meant it."

With another sharp tug, she cried out.

"Answer me, Hunter. Am I getting my point across?"

"Yes, sir! I'm going!"

"Good."

She quickly slid out of the nook's booth and reached for her phone.

"Leave it. I'll bring it up when I come to bed. Now, go."

Oh no. She knew she had deleted the messages from Henry, but her stomach still dropped when he said that. What if she had missed one? Then he’d not only know that she had been talking to him, but the she was deleting her messages.

"Yes, sir."

She scurried out of the room, not looking back to see what he was doing. He couldn't have known about the messages to Henry, so she didn't know what had set him off.

Once she got into the bedroom, she brushed her teeth, washed her face, shrugged out of her dress, and slid into bed. She shivered, but not because she was cold. Tom was angry... again. This was becoming a trend that she wasn't too fond of. Although, she supposed that she brought it on herself by talking back to him. She was just trying to be nice by doing the dishes herself, instead of having Duncan do it, but that very much backfired on her.

She stayed huddled under the covers for two hours waiting on Tom to decide her fate for the night. She knew that once she learned the rules a little better, and learned to follow them a little more closely, this would happen less... but for now, it was hard on her. The learning curve for obeying Tom was a steep one, but she'd eventually get there.

She was just about to fall asleep there on his pillow, when the door creaked open. He moved toward her, expressionless, and she sat up quickly.

"Sir? Should I get into position?"

He sighed. "No, Hunter. Lay back down, love."

She was confused, but she did as he asked.

He perched on the side of the bed beside her. "I'm in a bit of a strange spot. You disobeyed the rules by talking back to me... but I can hardly punish you for it when you were speaking out of the kindness your heart. I washed all the dishes off and put them in the dishwasher, by the way, so I think that your kindness rubbed off on me. I'm sorry I got so angry. You've got a heart that is much bigger than mine, and I should have seen that you were just being kind. Here I am, trying to make you a better person... but you are already a better person than me."

What?

"This night has taken its toll on me, sweetheart. I don't really know what to think, or do, right now. I can't have something that I want so badly... and that's never happened to me before. You are the only thing I want, love... but I can't have you, can I? Not really. You're someone else's."

Hunter's heart broke for this strong, devastatingly handsome, powerful man, that was literally crumbling before her eyes. "But, you do have me, sir. An engagement ring wouldn't change that. I am yours." She sat up slowly and took his hands in hers. "No other man can touch me like you do... or love me like you do... or take care of me like you do." She watched his eyes fall from her face before looking down at their intertwined hands. "You said that you'd wait on me... don't let me down, sir. Please, stick by me through this... and I promise... one day soon I'll make a perfect wife for you."

He nodded as he pulled her into a tight embrace. "I can't wait for that day, darling..."

[hamitome--imagines]

Unwanted Conversations

* Anthony Ramos x Reader * Modern rpf * 146: I wasn’t planning on asking you, but I’ve come to realize that life is short. Will you marry me? * Requested by @doggirl212 * Request: with Anthony where he was looking at a wedding ring for his girlfriend, but he only saw the readers face for each one and he realizes he loves them.

A/N: done! I don’t really have much to add except I have horrible writer’s block and absolutely no motivation to do…anything. So, I’m apologizing for my slowness. But anyway, enjoy!

Word Count: 2,780

~~

“She is so amazing!” You friend Anthony was currently raving about some girl he’d met after a showing of Hamilton. You worked stage crew on the show and the two of you had become fast friends. The past few days he’d been going on and on about this girl he met backstage after the show. You were growing bored of it by now.

“Uh-huh?” You mumbled, uninterested. You were scrolling through you phone and sipping a coffee from Javier’s makeshift coffee shop. You were both sitting on the couch in his dressing room.

“Are you even listening?” Anthony asked. You sighed, locked you phone, placed your coffee on the table by the couch, and looked up at him.

“Not really. But that’s only because I’ve heard this a thousand times by now. This girl is super pretty and funny and amazing. You’ve told me this countless times already.” You complained.

“You wouldn’t happen to be jealous would you Y/N?” He teased. You grabbed a throw pillow from behind you on the couch and hit him in the face with it.

“Dream on.” You grumbled. Suddenly, you got hit in the face with a pillow.

“Pay back’s a bitch.” Anthony laughed. That’s how Oak walked in to find the two of you have a pillow fight with throw pillows.

“Do I want to know?” He asked.

“Y/N, started it!” Anthony blamed you like a child. It was true, but insanely childish. So you smacked the back of his head with your pillow.

“Whatever. We still have an evening show to do so I gotta go.” You said as you dropped the pillow. “You two outta start getting ready.” You advised.

“Yes ma'am.” Anthony replied with a mock salute. Eventually the musical started and you did your jobs backstage. Whenever you had some time, you’d stand off stage and watch your friends perform with their heart and soul. You liked watching Anthony. He was brilliant at this. He could perfectly portray twenty-something John Laurens, as well as nine years old Philip. He was great.

As always, after the show, you told your friends how well they did. As usual, Anthony wrapped you in a hug and spun you around. He did that after the first night on Broadway. He was excited it had gone so well and you had been the closest person to him. It became a thing between the two of you. It was a thing you enjoyed and always looked forward to. Only because it was routine. That’s all. — “Well should I bring her or not?” Anthony was asking you a few months later. He was now officially dating the same girl from months ago. Now he was pondering if he should bring her to a cast and crew party at the end of the week.

“I don’t know. Do whatever you want.” You snapped. You were so tired of having these conversations. “Look, take your girlfriend if you want. I don’t care. I have stuff to do.” With that you stood up and left the room.

“Wait. Y/N!” Anthony called. “What the hell was that about?” He muttered.

It was the day of the party. It was a party at a bar, not much else. Still, it was a time for you to hang out, the cast and crew, as a family. You looked forward to these get togethers. That was until Anthony finally showed up with his girlfriend. And he came straight over to you.

“Hey Y/N, I wanted to finally introduce you to my girlfriend. I know I talk about her a lot.” He admitted with a shrug.

“Yeah. That is definitely something you do.” You awkwardly agreed. This was not a conversation you wanted to have.

“It’s nice to meet you. You know, Anthony talks about you a lot as well. You seem so nice, I’m glad I finally get to put a face to the name I hear so often.” His girlfriend chirped happily.

“Yeah. Likewise. Look, I told Groff I had something to tell him. I gotta go.” You quickly said. You were desperate to leave this encounter. You quickly found your way to Jonathan’s side. “Hey.” You mumbled.

He looked over at you in confusion. “You ok?” He asked.

“Anthony brought his girlfriend. I don’t really want to be the third wheel all night long.” You grumbled.

Jonathan wrapped an arm around your shoulders. “Then you can hang with me!” He said happily.“I solemnly swear not to hook up with a chick tonight.” He vowed making you double over laughing.

“Or any other night I bet.” You told him.

“Eh probably not. But you know that doesn’t change the fact that I won’t tonight.” He agreed. So you stayed with Groff all night. However, you got annoyed every time you caught a glimpse of Anthony and his girlfriend. Eventually it was too much to handle and you decided to leave.

“Hey, Groff. I’m gonna head out.” You told him.

“You sure?” He asked.

“Yeah I’m fine. Just kinda tired.” You told him. As you were walking out a hand grabbed your wrist.

“Wait.” It was Anthony. “Are you leaving?”

“Uh yeah.” You answered.

“We haven’t hung out much yet tonight. You kinda hung around Groff the whole time.” He said in almost a grumble.

“Yeah sorry. Look, I’m just tired and wanna leave. I’ll see you at work though.” You told him before stepping out of the building. — “Why am I here again?” You asked from the back seat of Daveed’s car.

“Because I need a chick’s opinion.” Anthony told you from the passenger seat. Anthony had been dating his girlfriend for almost a year at this point. You still hadn’t warmed up to her. You didn’t even like being near her. Though, you always acted cordially. So much so that Anthony thought you and her were good friends.

A few days ago, Anthony asked you and Daveed for some help. Some help picking out an engagement ring. You don’t really know why you agreed to help. Yet you sat in Daveed’s car, in front of a jewelry store. You climbed from the car with them. You suppressed a groan as you walked into the store.

The bright lights, the glass cases, the stiff awkward air of any jewelry store, the sparkle everywhere. You hated it. You trailed behind the two men as they approached the ring case. You stood behind them but eventually got bored and wandered off. You came to stand in front of the necklace case, scanning and looking for any sort of distraction.

Anthony and Daveed continued staring at the rings. “See anything?” Daveed asked.

Anthony hummed, a bit discouraged. “Not really.” He let out a small chuckle. “Though, Y/N would like that one.” He said as he pointed to a ring.

Daveed looked at it but then gave Anthony a strange look. “Yeah I guess. But we’re not exactly looking for her.”

“No, of course not. I’m just saying…” He trailed off. He wasn’t even sure what he was saying. And Daveed realized that.

“What exactly are you saying Anthony?” He asked with a smirk. He turned and leaned back against the glass case and shot his friend a teasing and knowing look.

“Look, we just hang out a lot it all. I know her taste. I saw something that she would like and pointed it out. That’s all.” Anthony defended himself.

“If you say so.” Daveed said. Anthony huffed and glared at him. But then turned to see where exactly you had gone. You were bent down looking in a case of necklaces. He walked over to you.

“Something sparkly catch your eye?” He asked. You jumped in surprise, not realizing he’d walked up.

“Uh no. Just wasting time. Need my opinion on something?” You asked hesitantly.

“Nah. I didn’t really see anything too good. At least nothing she’d like.” He said with a shrug.

“Hm. Bummer.” You said absent mindedly. You had gone back to gazing into the glass case in front of you.

“Seriously? You seeing something in there?” Anthony asked once more. You only shrugged. He crouched down next to you to look at the necklaces as well. “What one?” He asked, lightly nudging you.

You, with a small smile at his playfulness, relented and pointed to a necklace. “That one. It’s pretty is all.” Anthony just hummed a noise of acknowledgement. Daveed came up between you two.

“We done here?” He asked. You and Anthony stood up straight.

“Yeah I think so.” Anthony agreed. The three of you left the store.

“We going to a different shop?” You asked. After all, there were plenty around.

“Uh nah. I don’t really feel up to it.” Anthony said.

“We went to one store.” You said in disbelief. “One store! And you’re calling it quits?”

“Look, I just…I need to look around online and stuff. I need to figure out the right kind of ring.” He stuttered to explain.

“Ok…” You answered. You caught on to his reluctance but didn’t comment. He sat in silence the whole way back to your home. — The next day of work Anthony was quiet. Too quiet. You were sat side-by-side on the couch as usual but he wasn’t saying much. Merely staring off into space. You lightly kicked him. “You ok?” You asked

That seemed to shake him from his trance. “Yeah. Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Nothing, it’s just your quiet. Your usually gushing about your lady friend by now.” You muttered. You didn’t want him to start up talking about her again but then at least he’d seem himself.

“You don’t like her do you?” Anthony asked.

“What?” You asked back. You thought he believed you were close friends.

“I thought you did for a bit.” He did admit. “But the way you talk about her shows different.”

You shrugged. You were caught. “I guess I just don’t like her being around.” You told him. “She’s all you talk about and the only person you ever see anymore. I kinda feel like I was tossed to the side.” You sighed. You didn’t want to have this conversation either. So you stood up. “Look, I think Lin needed my help with something. I gotta go.” A blatant lie but you needed out of there. So you left the room before Anthony could stop you.

You decided you could at least find Lin and talk with him until the show needed to start. At least that way you weren’t completely lying. Plus, if Anthony came to find you, you’d be where you said you’d be. So you knocked on Lin’s door and pushed it open a crack. “Yeah?” You heard Lin say, signaling the all-clear to enter.

“Hey.” You greeted with a smile. He was lounging on a couch playing some video game, but he paused it as you came in. You lowered yourself into a chair that was opposite the couch.

“What’s up?” He questioned. He sat up and swung his legs off the couch so he could face you.

“Oh nothing, you can keep playing.” You said and waved toward the tv. “I’m just hiding.”

Lin laid back on the couch how he had been before. He held the controller but didn’t start the game yet. “From who?” He asked with a laugh.

“Anthony.”

“Why? You guys get along great.” He said in confusion.

“We just had an awkward conversation. Plus, all he talks about now is his girlfriend that he’s soooo in love with.” You complained.

“I thought he dumped her.” Lin said, eyes trained on the TV as he started his game again.

“What? No way. He went ring shopping a few days ago.” You told him.

“Yeah and a few days ago he broke up with her.” Lin countered. “I dunno, maybe the prospect of buying a ring spooked him. But he’s definitely single now.” The two of you fell into silence as Lin played his game and you watched.

You stood off to the side of the stage later as crew does during the show. You never grew tired of it and honestly, it was nice to focus on Alexander Hamilton’s shit storm of a life. His was mapped out and decided already, even set to catchy songs. Yours was confusing and uncharted. The curtain fell and everyone went to rid themselves of costumes. For the first time, Anthony avoided you as he came off stage. He walked right by and didn’t even spare you glance. He seemed like he was deep in thought.

You continued with your jobs, which was hectic at the shows opening and ending. “Hey Y/N.” You glanced up as Daveed called your name. “Anthony said he wanted to talk to you. He should be in his dressing room.” You thanked Daveed and grumbled. You didn’t want to have another awkward conversation. You’d had too many lately. Still, you took a deep breath and went to Anthony’s room.

You waltzed right in, knowing Daveed wouldn’t send you over while Anthony was still changing. “You wanted to talk to me?” You asked.

“Yeah.” Anthony smiled but it was a nervous smile. Then he sighed. “You know, my role has never bothered me before. I can go on and play Laurens and Philip and it’s fine. But it kinda jarred me tonight.” You sat down next to him as he rambled. You had no clue where this was going. “I mean, both me die so young. And I have to be the one doing the dying every night.

"Philip was 19! He had so much of his life left. He never got to meet the girl of his dreams. Never got to have a family. Because his life was short. Laurens had a wife and kids but people questioned whether they were really in love or if was merely security. I can’t decided which would be worse honestly. Dying before you meet the one you love, or living your short life with someone you don’t.”

You put your hand over Anthony’s. He was rambling and it was worrying you. “Hey. You need to take a deep breath. What’s got you so worked up?” You asked and squeezed his hand in reassurance.

“Doing the show tonight I realized something. I also realized something a few days ago. Well, I wasn’t planning on asking you, but I’ve come to realize that life is short. Will you marry me?” He slid from his spot on the couch next to you and onto one knee. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small box. Inside was a ring that matched the necklace you had liked.

“Anthony-I-wait-what?” You stuttered. You were not expecting this. Anthony closed the box and came to sit next to you once more.

“At the store, looking at rings I realized something. I was looking for something my ex would’ve liked but everything I looked at, I was wondering if you’d like it. I could find rings you’d like or hate but couldn’t even focus on my ex. It was weird. And I realized that was because I liked you so much. I knew you perfectly because I liked you.”

“Anthony, we aren’t even dating.” You reasoned.

“And if you want to, we totally can. I mean, if you’d go out with me that is. But I felt like I could ask because we’ve been friends for a long time.” He slowly started leaning in closer. “We know each other. And I know you well enough to know that I am completely in love with you.” With that you surged forward and captured his lips with yours. He pulled you forward so you were straddling his lap and he kissed you soundly.

Of course you had hated his girlfriend. You were jealous. You hated that she was with him and not you but you couldn’t figure out why. It felt like she took something from you, and in a way she did. She took your best friend and the man you loved. You just didn’t realize you loved him yet. You had been friends with Anthony for so long that your attraction slowly grew without you realizing it. But a guys proposing and professing his love can make you realize a thing or two.

Anthony pulled back and rested his forehead against yours. You were both panting, breathless from the kiss. “So? Y/N, will you marry me?” He asked.

You smiled and pretended to be thinking it over. “Usually guys buy me dinner before they propose. But what the hell? Yes, Anthony. Absolutely yes.”