#Lapis leaves Peridot and Pumpkin while taking the whole damn barn with her to the moon

[littlemaggpie]

Just started watching season 5 of Steven Universe this morning. I'm afraid that if I watch any more episodes today I'm going to turn into Blue Diamond

[thedragoncael]

Raising the Barn: an Analysis

I’ll preface this by saying, to me this episode wasn’t surprising. I don’t think their relationship, with the way it developed, could have led to any other outcome.

This episode is super important to look at closely, because it’s a culmination of a number of things from past episodes involving Lapis and Peridot. I want to offer my opinion on why things unfolded the way they did.

The focus will revolve around the scene towards the end of “Raising the Barn,” where Peridot admits to Lapis that she doesn’t want to go. Is it evidence that Lapis and Peridot’s relationship is abusive? Nah. Healthy relationships can and do have disagreements, and I’ll explain why Peridot isn’t afraid of Lapis in a moment. Did they “break up”? You could see it that way, or you could look at it as a hard decision that forced them to part ways unwillingly. Will they learn and grow from this, and eventually reunite? I have no doubts.

This particular scene is the moment where their lack of full, honest communication, while it may have kept them afloat in the beginning, was no longer serving them, and it led to a big misunderstanding. It had to happen eventually. Dishonesty isn’t a stable foundation to build a relationship on. But that doesn’t mean they aren’t fundamentally compatible. 

What people need to realize is that good characters grow as a story progresses and realistic relationships aren’t perfect. This is what makes a character dynamic and complex.

There’s no question that Peridot and Lapis care deeply about one another. Think about how Lapis was willing to take Peridot, Pumpkin and Steven with her to space, and nothing else. She didn’t mull over the decision. It was instantaneous, and she assumed they’d all agree with her and be on board.

Which takes us to this moment:

Lapis’ body language here isn’t just concerned; it’s defeated and guarded. This is where the harsh reality of the situation dawns on her:

1. She trusted Peridot, only to discover that Peridot hasn’t been completely honest with her.

2. Peridot really isn’t going to come with her, barn be damned.

3. Peridot might not have been honest because, through Lapis’ eyes, it’s possible that Peridot may be afraid of her.

Those first two realizations hold a lot of water (pun intended). But the third is where there’s yet another misunderstanding between these two characters that has yet to be resolved.

Lapis: “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

Peridot: “Well, there are many things I should say, but they would upset you, so in general I …don’t…say those things?”

Lapis: “Peridot that’s lying!”

Again, these three lines in particular are especially revealing. Things of note:

-Peridot ends her line in question form, and it’s likely because she’s realizing that being dishonest was a mistake, and caused more harm than good.

-Lapis wanted her to be fully honest with her from the beginning.

-Peridot didn’t tell her sooner because she doesn’t like upsetting Lapis.

The hotly-debated question tacked on to #3 is why. Why go through so much trouble not to upset Lapis? A popular opinion is that Peridot fears Lapis’ wrath. Although I don’t doubt that the fear of a physical altercation is always in the back of Peridot’s mind, I think it’s because she’s simply nervous by nature, she knows she’s tiny, and she’s been hurt before. Yes, Lapis is powerful and highly emotional to boot, and of course that’s going to come into play at this point in time. But what I’d like to point out is that this wariness holds true with Peridot’s interactions with almost everyone and everything that is vaguely threatening. It hasn’t just been Lapis. It’s been Steven. It’s been the CGs. It’s been Jasper.

Peridot’s body language in “Raising the Barn” was certainly nail-bitingly nervous. That said, there’s a definitive difference in body language between this:

…and this:

At no point in “Raising the Barn” did Peridot’s body language indicate that she was afraid of being physically hurt. What she was terrified of was screwing up their carefully built relationship, and of having to admit that she hadn’t been honest, possibly destroying Lapis’ trust in her forever.

Peridot cares about Lapis’ wellbeing. She’s proven over and over that she’s Lapis’ biggest and most passionate advocate for healing–at this point even more-so than Steven. Peri knows how much pain Lapis has already gone through, and she doesn’t want to cause her any more discomfort by saying things that trigger her to relive painful memories.

The problem is Lapis is still working through the mirror stuff, the Jasper stuff, the crystal gem stuff, and the insecurities surrounding the whole “I’m supposed to be falling in love with Earth like everyone else, but because it’s taking me a while, I must be broken” stuff. What she sees in Peridot’s dishonesty is betrayal. She sees someone she trusted letting her down, and its not hard to assume that Lapis is left wondering why, even now as she sits alone in space.

It would be easy for Lapis to come to the conclusion that Peridot is afraid of her. Lapis is undoubtedly aware of how powerful she is, of how emotional she can get at the drop of a hat, and of how much bitter willpower her twiggy little frame can muster. After all, she shares the qualities of the element she wields. Water is the element of emotion. Water is highly polar. Water gives life as easily as it can take it away.

What she brings to the table is perhaps not enough to beat the diamonds, hence her fleeing from Earth. But against any other gem? She’s a force to be reckoned with. By extension, she’s also probably figured out that those qualities may end up making people fear her. I don’t think she wants that.

Peridot may not have been around for Malachite, but she was around when the Rubies came. She witnessed Lapis smack their ship out of the sky as nonchalantly as someone dribbling a basketball.

I’m sure Lapis heard “Holy smokes” fall out of Peridot’s slack jaw.

Also note that Peridot also knows the general qualities of gems, from her past as a Kindergartener. She would know what a Lapis is able to do. In fact, we’ve heard her spout stats about Lapis Lazuli’s before. Considering that Peridot knows all of this and is still taken aback by our Lapis’ casual display of power? That really says something. Our Lapis might not be your run-of-the-mill gem.

This could be why Peridot has so much faith in Lapis. She says, “I think we can win… I think you can win,” even through a cracking voice, because she truly believes it. She’s willing to stake everything on Lapis’ immense power.

It may be because Peridot knows they’re on a planet that is overwhelmingly water-based. It’s not just in the oceans and lakes, but in the plants and animals and clouds. It’s utterly everywhere. But therein lies another problem.

Lapis, it seems, has grown more uncomfortable with her strength as the show has progressed. It’s a possibility that Lapis hasn’t ever been on a planet quite like Earth before. The time between when she first arrived and when she got trapped in a mirror may have been so short that she never really got the hang of the extent to which her powers are amplified here.

We can thank the Jasper arc for revealing this insecurity. Her turmoil while on the boat in “Alone at Sea” shows how much Lapis surprised herself with how cruel and unforgiving she became. I don’t think she thought she had that in her:

Steven: “But…she’s terrible.”

Lapis: “I’m terrible! I did horrible things! I–I broke your dad’s leg, I stole Earth’s ocean…go on, tell me I’m wrong!”

. .  .Seconds later, Jasper climbs on to the boat and tells Steven, “You’re pointing that shield the wrong way. She’s the one you should be afraid of.”

Lapis: “That’s not true.”

Jasper: “You can’t lie to me. I’ve seen what you’re capable of. I thought I was a brute, but you…you’re a monster.”

I think that last line really got under her skin. She stutters out an “I-” in response, but she doesn’t disagree.

Instead, she says, “I was terrible to you. I liked taking everything out on you. I needed to I-I hated you. It was bad.”

It’s not unreasonable to say she probably wonders if everyone sees her as a lit fuse. She might begin to ask herself if there’s anyone who acts authentic around her, or if they’re all just walking on eggshells. Peridot included.

Lapis doesn’t want to be feared by the people she cares about, and she doesn’t want to lose control again and unintentionally hurt them.

As far as Lapis’ “There’s no need to get so emotional!” line …that seems like textbook projection. But why would this upset Lapis so much? The key thing to note is that the barn was not part of Lapis’ original escape plan. She only figures out how she can take the barn along because of Peridot.

Peri’s attachment to the barn might stir up feelings in Lapis similar to that of being “trapped” again—but this time in the more metaphorical sense: Inadvertently trapping yourself in a single place because you’ve grown too fond of it, to the point that you are unwilling to leave it behind. Putting all your eggs in one basket effectively  “traps” you with the basket.

So she gets angry at Peri’s sentimentality, because it’s needlessly “trapping” her on Earth, a planet which is becoming more and more dangerous by the second. Lapis combs her mind for a way to take the barn along, but only to convince Peridot to come. What Lapis doesn’t realize until the very end is that it’s not really the barn that Peridot is so attached to. It’s Earth itself. There’s nothing Lapis can do about that.

I’ve seen people say that the mere fact that Lapis left them behind proves she doesn’t really care about them. But you can’t look at these screenshots and tell me that doing it didn’t absolutely rip her to shreds:

This wasn’t an easy decision for her to make. I can tell you from experience that fear and panic will easily override everything else in your mind. Your only priority is to survive, even if it means abandoning the things you love.

It’s also interesting to note that Lapis takes the barn despite it all. This suggests that Lapis does, in fact, carry a certain sentimentality about the farm that she doesn’t necessarily want to admit to.

It makes sense that commitment and attachment would scare her. Of course she’s going to be obsessed over feeling free. This may be part of the reason why she has yet to pick a side in the gem war. Even though the war technically affects her, she’s not interested in taking additional stress on, in devoting herself to anything, in bogging herself down with that kind of emotional muck. Can you really blame her, when she’s already psychologically weighed down by so much?

Lapis only really tries to see Earth in a new light for Steven and Peridot’s sake. And she does truly try. But through her eyes, the Earth still represents a lot of pain. She’s still processing her past, and because of that, she’s still mentally stuck in it. I don’t think she’s had the time to think about the future. Even living at the barn with Peridot, things were only just barely starting to look up for her.

We’ve seen the immediate impact the split-up has on Peridot in the very next episode, “Back to the Kindergarten.” Peridot flips between depression, anger and hopelessness. Via failed metaphorical gardening venture, she convinces herself that she majorly screwed up, irreparably destroying her and Lapis’ relationship:

“I don’t know why I’m surprised. I should’ve known not to have hope. It’s not going to work. It’s never going to work, okay?! …I feel just great now that I know that nothing’s ever going to get better. Everything is just ruined forever. We can’t get any of it back. Not my home, not Lapis, and not this crummy planet either. We might as well just throw it all in the garbage and toss ourselves in after, because it’s all just hopeless trash!”

Peridot hits a new low, and to those of us used to her upbeat and optimistic attitude, it’s alarming. But, thanks to the support of Amethyst and Steven, she’s found renewed hope.

We have yet to see how Lapis has been affected by the unexpected refusal of anyone to follow her. Will she realize she’s made a mistake? Will something happen to change her views? Will she stubbornly refuse to help?

Edit: a recent trailer has confirmed that Lapis has taken up residence on the moon. At first, this might seem contradictory. If your goal is to get as far away from the Diamonds as possible, why stop here?

This strongly suggests that Lapis hasn’t actually decided whether to stay or leave yet.

She’s taking a step back from the commotion so she can think with a calmer, more rational head. It’s entirely possible that Lapis knows deep down she is more invested in the Earth’s fate than she lets on. So, maybe this is just a secluded place that allows her to center and prepare herself--to “secure her oxygen mask”, as Rebecca Sugar said in a recent podcast--without the influence of other people.

Perhaps Lapis will begin realize what she’s truly giving up--a unique home and a supportive family--and what she’s sentencing herself to by fleeing: A life of isolation and fear.

This chance she’s given herself, to look down at the Earth from her distant lunar perch, may be exactly what she needs to make her final choice. I suspect she wasn’t fully committed to her decision the second she left, rather, it was a heat-of-the-moment move. So, the moon acts as a in-between--not quite present and not quite gone--where she can be by herself and mull things over.

What’s all this spell for Lapis and Peridot’s future? Much needed growth. The barn life, while peaceful, was ultimately stagnating to their character development. Maybe this is just the thing they needed. I firmly believe that this is not the end of their arc as a duo; it’s the middle of it. There will be more of these two.

[jenhedgehog]

Submitted by: Anon

IT’S ANGST TIME! It’s half an hour past midnight, and Lapis, Peridot and Pumpkin are taking a walk alongside the lake, the moonlight reflecting on the surface of the water enlights the whole scenario giving a beautiful and relaxing atmosphere, the two are chatting and sharing various new little heart experiences, and in a moment of distraction of Lapis, Peridot playfully splashed some water behind her back, this started a splashing war between them, a war that Peridot is going obviously to lose, and Pumpkin just jumping around and barking excitedly. The two are now sitting on the shore, Peridot has her head resting on Lapis shoulder, with Pumpkin sleeping on Peridots lap, they’re here, content with just being peacefully with each others company, this night seems peaceful, until… … from the water emerges a huge, semitransparent, crab-like creature, seemingly made of water, with a light blue gem embedded on its left pincer. With a strident scream towards the now startled gems and frightened poor pumpkin, the monster rushes to attack them, Lapis quickly creates a giant fist from the water to punch its face, but… the fist just passed through it! Off course, this creature is made of water, this means that it is immune to Lapis attacks, now Peridot has to think to something quickly, she looks around her to find something metallic to smash on the monster, but there is not even a single piece of junk to use here on this normally beautiful natural landscape, but now only a dangerous place with no weapons to defend themselves, the only thing that they can do now is… “RUN”! Lapis shouts, and quickly grabs pumpkin with her left arm and Peridot with her right one, and with a quick motion she spreads out her water wings and flies away, but before she can reaches enough altitude… … the monster, exending one huge pincher abruptly, manages to catch them midair, grabs Peridot by her head and makes lapis falling down, she tries to protect pumpkin from the impact shielding him with her arms, and succeeded to take the both of them on the ground without any significant damage, she goes to stand up when… “AAAHHH!!!” she froze, eyes wide open in fear, hearing Peridots voice screaming in pain behind her she turns around and gasps seeing the monster pressing its giant pincer around Peridots head, holding her high off the ground, and even more worrying, she notices that Peridots body is… glitching, this could only mean one thing… “PERI, NOOO”! Lapis hastily creates another giant fist and tries again to to punch out the monster without thinking twice, she’s driven by pure instinct and fear, in fact the giant fist passes through the monsters body again, she has to think to something else, and fast, or else Peridot will be soon shattered… she got it, she have an idea, she creates like a giant water axe and goes to cut a big tree trunk, once she cut it, she creates a giant water hand again, grabs the trunk with it and, while the monster is too occupied crushing the poor green gems head… … “TAKE THIS, YOU MORON”! Lapis tosses the big trunk with the water hand, and hit the monster with it rigth in the middle, causing its body to fall apart in a huge rain of scattered water and poofs, letting its gem and Peridot fall down in the shore of the lake, with the trunk that fell down only a couple of meters away of Peridots still glitching limp body. Pumpkin, barking worriedly, runs to Peridot, Lapis stares from far away with an horrified expression where her companion is lying unconscious, and, snapping out of her shock, runs over there too. Peridot is lying on the ground, glitching even more than before, with her face turned to the other side of where Lapis is coming from, so that she can’t see her face from where she is now, plus now Pumpkin is covering her head too, trying to wake up her with soft whimpers and paw touches, Lapis reaches her, Pumpkin sadly move away a little to make space for her, she kneels down, gently takes her glitching face and turns it in front of her… … she gasps in shock as she sees in which state is her face now: her visor is completely gone, not even a single shard of glass remains, her whole face has evident signs of having been under pressure (any other gem would have been poofed, how on earth she isn’t), an expression that shows debility and pain, but the worst thing is the large and deep crack in her gem that is causing the continuos glitch of her body and the risk for her life. Seeing her suffering like this is upsetting, to say the least, but Lapis must focus on bringing her to Steven as soon as possible to have her gem cured, she bubbles the gem of the damn monster and sends it to the barn, she immediately takes Peridot in her arms, Pumpkin jumps on her back, then she spreads her water wings and… “L-Lapis…” she hears the fleeble voice of Peridot,“Peri! Hold on, I’m taking you to Steven, you will be fine” “N-no, I d-don’t have m-much time…” “Peri, no…” Lapis can’t hold back her tears anymore,“L-Lapis, I-I…” one last rapid sequence of glitches and then her gem… “NO!!!”… … Lapis tightens her grip on her and suddenly a bright light radiates out, wrapping the both of them, the silhouette of the light gets bigger and then it fades away until the fusion is fully revealed, Pumpkin watched in amazement the whole sequence and now is wondering who this tall turquoise colored gem with four arms and huge water wings is, she doesn’t seems in good shape though, she’s glitching slightly and has a big crack on one of her gems, the one in her forehead, while the one on her back is just fine, she appears to be struggling to mantain a standing position “I-I just couldn’t let you be g-gone forever…” Pumpkin isn’t sure if he understood what his owners… owner said to them… herself, but he clearly saw the tenderness in her eyes when she gently picked him up and cradled him in two of her four arms “c'mon, l-let’s get out of here and find Steven b-before I’ll pass out” she spreads her huge water wings, glitches a few more times, and flies off, leaving the beautiful but apparently dangerous lake behind, still shimmering in the moonlight. OK NOT SO ANGSTY MAYBE, SORRY FOR FLOODING YOUR INBOX, HOPE YOU LIKED IT, ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE AND THIS IS MY FIRST ATTEMPT AT FANFIC SO THERE MIGHT BE SOME MISTAKES, FEEL FREE TO EDIT, BYE :D

There’s no need to apologise, Anon :)  Thanks a lot for the submission, I really enjoyed reading it!