#LadyTem's ask box

[ladytemeraire]

Pro or anti tchotchkes?

Pro as long as it's not like a hoarding situation or something! I collect dragons and sheep and carousel horses, it would be a little hypocritical for me to be against it haha. While generally I like objects in my house to be functional as well as decorative, sometimes their function is just to spark joy!

Thanks for the ask!

(Ask meme for people over 30)

[ladytemeraire]

Hello My Freind 🌹

I want your support My house was destroyed and I am currently living in a tent with my children 😞

My Mom and Dad who suffer from chronic diseases, They need urgent medical care and medications that are not available 💔

https://www.gofundme.com/f/Help-Mohammed-alhabil-Family

Please help my family by donating or reblog my campaign is going very slowly 🙏🍉

.

Boosting!

This campaign has been vetted on the master spreadsheet of vetted campaigns (line 170).

[ladytemeraire]

Ack! A surprise late boop! How dare!

[ladytemeraire]

👣

Who are some great influencers in your writing? Or blog?

Off the top of my head, in no particular order:

Naomi Novik, in case that wasn't screamingly obvious from my username; I love her dragons, I love her humans, I love how she scatters foreshadowing and little plot nuggets so far in advance that you don't even realize it until they come back to bite you, I love how she perfectly nails that dragon-and-rider dynamic of "this incredibly powerful and intelligent creature is bonded to you and is still their own person but they chose you and you chose each other and they love you" that hits me right in my id.

Timothy Zahn, and not just for sheer nostalgia (though that's definitely a factor); I love and envy how he handles an ensemble cast with multiple distinct voices and a long-spanning plot full of intrigue and so many moving parts. Also there are several turns of phrase from his books that live rent-free in my head even decades after I first read them, which is the kind of wordsmithing ability I want to hone.

Ursula Vernon/T Kingfisher, because the more of her work I read, the more I fall in love with the in-over-their-head-but-dammit-someone's-gotta-do-it protagonist type that shows up in so many of her books. I find myself leaning more and more towards heroes that choose themselves rather than Chosen Ones and I think she does a really good job of writing them. (Also she is a Dog Person and thus writes dogs extremely well.)

Terry Pratchett, because his humor and and righteous fury and snark and social justice all delicately balanced to lure you in so one exquisitely crafted grain of truth can take you out at the knees is truly aspirational.

Honorable mention to Anne McCaffrey, because while I can't say she influenced my writing style or voice at all, the Dragonriders of Pern was what made me want to start seriously writing in the first place.

(As for the blog - I dunno, this is a digital commonplace book, I just throw whatever I feel like here, but I read a lot of the Yarn Harlot during the rise of blogs so some of her writing almost certainly rubbed off on me. And I definitely use the "poetic phrase based off vibes" tagging style as some of my favorite and longest-followed Tumblr folks - pyrrhiccomedy, wizzard890, notbecauseofvictories, and bedlamsbard to name a few.)

Thanks for asking!

Writers Ask Game

[ladytemeraire]

Please forgive me if this is overreaching, but I read over the post you recently reblogged about the pandemic, and I have to ask purely out of curiosity... do you believe that the pandemic was a hoax?

Hey nonny. If you're asking this in good faith, it's definitely not overreaching. I'm assuming that's the case, which is why I'm choosing to answer, and the answer is: no.

No, it was not a hoax. If it's the post I'm thinking of, I definitely was reblogging for the last addition by a mutual of mine that matches my own experience, and in the process I skimmed over the wording of OP and the reblog chain, which is fully my own fault.

COVID was not a hoax.

I watched my brother, a nursing assistant, work ridiculously long hours and wear extra PPE and watch patients suffer and die because even though he didn't work in a COVID unit, patients would still come in and test positive for COVID.

I have had multiple friends - people I know IRL, not just online - test positive for COVID, spend weeks recovering, and told me "HOLY FUCK YOU DO NOT WANT THIS VIRUS IT SUCKS."

I had a dear close friend whose mother in law refused to get vaccinated, got COVID, and died less than a week before my friend's wedding.

I really am sorry if that reblog gave you the impression I think it was a hoax, because that is not my opinion or lived experience at all. I do wish I'd kept better journals, and I do feel gaslight by the media and government, but that's only in the case of them telling us "COVID is over and you can go back to normal", but that is the only way I agree with that post.

Thank you for asking and prompting me to re-assess something I've reblogged. I genuinely appreciate it.

[ladytemeraire]

You mention this clothing website in the tags on something you reblog from me and I check it out and oh God I think I'm about to be very poor.

I'm guessing based on timing this is Holy Clothing? In which case, sorry not sorry and also you're welcome. (I literally just got the preorder mentioned in that post today and I'm wearing it as I type and I'm obsessed so not even remotely sorry.)

Some protips from someone who owns A Lot of their garments:

Wash their clothes separately or with extremely similar colors for the first few washes. IDK what dye they use (clearly something for natural fibers since most of their stuff is cotton or linen or bamboo rayon); their clothes don't fade but they do bleed, and it will stain other clothes if you're not careful. I own enough green clothes that I am okay with washing green garments from them with the rest of my clothes, and I still toss a color catcher in the wash just to be safe.

If it has ties or a belt, wash it in a lingerie bag/garment bag so it doesn't get tangled and/or shredded in the wash. Some ties may also benefit from adding aglets to them so they don't shred all to hell, but most of them have finished tabs on them so they don't unlace.

CHECK THE MEASUREMENTS FOR EACH GARMENT. I wear a Medium (M) for most of their garments, but if it's a vest or something else meant to be worn over another garment you may want to size up. For me, sizing up to L in the Torvi tunic was a mistake, but the size L Rogue cardi and Eowyn vest were perfect fits.

HolyClothing in general does a good job of paying their workers/artisans a living wage, and their prices and ordering times reflect that. I have had basically zero issues with quality in all the pieces I've ordered; in fact, I've had their Trinity Sleeveless vest for many many years and only now is a lower corner of embroidery coming loose, and that's something I can very easily fix.

Most of their item are very femme coded, but if you follow their Insta I know they are actively working with at least one artist on gender neutral and/or masc designs to expand their designs.

Happy shopping, and F in the chat to your wallet!

[ladytemeraire]

20

20. favourite things about the night?

The quiet. The peace. The way things settle, slow, soothe into a softer and gentler rhythm.

The way the heat and humidity drop, reducing sensory overstimulation and encouraging me to go outside while (after a certain hour) also meaning the insects that I react badly to are far less likely to be around to bite me. (I have borderline allergic reactions to certain insect bites, including mosquitoes, and while I recognize they are part of the ecosystem I also try to limit my exposure both to them and to pesticides/insect repellants as much as possible.)

The release of immediate constraints and deadlines (see also: "revenge bedtime procrastination"), freeing me from the need to be "on" in a social sense or worry about someone checking in on me and my progress, so I am more likely to pursue both personal and externally structured goals.

Being able to walk Sadie around our neighborhood without fear of other dogs, or random pedestrians, or motorcycles whizzing by at peak hours.

Related: the knowledge that if Sadie does react to something while we're on a walk, it's a legitimate issue, there is Something There, because she doesn't bark at nothing, and in the dark I can trust her instincts and senses over my own vision (vs the daylight, where I generally rely on my own reaction and perception to intercept triggers before she can react to them).

Being able to enjoy the outdoors in peace and stillness in a way that's not always possible during daytime hours.

The soft susurration of crickets and cicadas and frogs; seeing bats and night-flying birds dart about in their regular pursuits and hearing their noises as they go.

Watching lightning bugs/fireflies dance over any open space available, during the few months they are around.

The ability and freedom in all seasons, since I live in a relatively rural area, to step outside and (to paraphrase Walt Whitman) wander off by myself, in the mystical moist night-air, and from time to time, look up in perfect silence at the stars.

Thank you so much for asking!

[Questions I think it would be fun to be asked]

[ladytemeraire]

Honest feelings on Settlers of Catan?

I've played less than half a dozen games, but I thought it was pretty fun those times. Most if not all of them were with my brother and our mutual friend group, or with the younger members of our extended family; they didn't drag on for ages to my recollection and I was able to knit while waiting for my turn. I'm generally willing to play a game as long as it's not suggested like 30 minutes before the gathering is supposed to break up.

Thanks for the ask!

[ladytemeraire]

this isn't an ask so much but I just wanted to tell you that I love the tagging system you've adopted. sometimes you'll reblog something and the post itself is amazing but your tags on it bring me to tears

like this stained glass window picture I just scrolled down to find. love your tags on that!

Aww, thank you so much! I love it when my tagging system resonates with people 💜

[ladytemeraire]

hi sorry ur tag "the promise of a waiting hell on a billboard between farms" touched me. is that from somewhere else or did you write it. the promise of a waiting hell. the promise. the promise. going crazy over here

Hi!!! Don't apologize, I love it when people are moved by my tagging system, thank you for making my day.

As much as I wish I could take credit for it, that phrase comes from this poem by Hanif Abdurraqib (which I'll also copy here since Tumblr likes to eat links):

As soon as I read it I knew that had to be my Midwest tag (though "we regret to inform you that Ohio is barely a state" was a very close contender).

Thanks for the ask!

[ladytemeraire]

Hello! My orange friend on the timeline!

Insure you have something mythical for me!,

Not gonna lie, nonnie, I got quite a laugh out of these two asks showing up back-to-back. You're welcome for the dragons!

[ladytemeraire]

can I just say I love your tags… sometimes I’ll be mindlessly scrolling and something like “here I stand…” will make me pause and take a breather

Aww! This was such a nice message to get, thank you so much. I'm glad you like my tagging system, it just really jives with how my brain works!

[ladytemeraire]

same anon as before, here! I assure I was definitely asking in good faith! I was genuinely surprised to see a post of that nature on your blog, so I wanted to be sure. The entire time I was reading the post, I was thinking 'and what of the people who to this day refuse to quietly ignore those who choose to wear a mask?' so... yeah. It's a messy topic, but it's good to know I wasn't completely off base about your views on it! :)

Hey nonny! No no, you are absolutely fine. It's a fair question, and especially after I re-read the full reblog chain, I completely understand why you would have questions.

I'll be honest (and caveat beforehand, this is a commentary strictly on me not you), when I saw the original post in my inbox, my kneejerk reaction was "what the fuck, how dare this person, two seconds on my blog would make my views very clear, I am going to rip them a new one–"

And then I read the actual reblog chain, not just the last mutual I reblogged it from.

And I was like oh.

Well.

Shit.

I fucked up on that one, didn't I.

(And this, my dears, is why it's very important to read the entire reblog chain, not just skim things or assume that because a mutual reblogged it, the entire post is safe or aligns with your beliefs.)

Anyway! Genuinely, anon, thank you for the question and the gentle Gibbs-smack upside the head, because I've gotten a bit cavalier about that, and this is one topic in particular where I do not want my views to be misunderstood.

(And for the record, if you're still wearing a mask: you're not alone. I still wear one in stores and in the office on my fortnightly visits, I try to stick to outdoor eating venues as much as possible, and I only have group events with people who I know are vaccinated and similarly careful. You're not imagining things and you're not being paranoid if you keep masking in group settings.)

[ladytemeraire]

Fireside.

fireside - if you had your dream wardrobe, what would it look like?

Ooh, fun question! I'd say lots of cozy tweeds and plaids, plenty of earth tones with a few pops of bright jewel tones, and a ton of natural fibers. Plenty of tunic tops and vests/waistcoats, with an emphasis on tailored lines and feminine cuts. And handknits, obviously, lots and lots of handknits for all seasons.

Basically give me a cross of Hobbit/ranger/Jedi/elf/Edwardian fashion and I'd be completely happy, haha. =D Thanks for asking!

(autumnal asks)

[ladytemeraire]

Have you gotten anything from eShakti recently? I know they had some issues a few months back (involving supply chain problems, I think) and people were having massive delays, just wondering if they've sorted those yet

Heya! The most recently I've ordered from them was about six months ago, right smack in the middle of both the holidays and the shipping issues you mentioned. I still got my items fairly promptly but I have no idea if there are still issues going on, sorry!

[ladytemeraire]

8, 18

8. If you had to write an entire story without either action or dialogue, which would you choose and how would it go?

Oh, this is a hard one. I guess if I had to pick, I'd go without dialogue, because I honestly love threading the needle of conveying nonverbal communication in body language and sensory details.

(Also I've kind of done the "without action/only with dialogue" version, albeit in an epistolary format using text messages and IMs, so doing the reverse would be a fun challenge!)

18. Choose a passage from your writing. Tell me about the backstory of this moment. How you came up with it, how it changed from start to end. Spicy addition: Questioner provides the passage.

(I don't think I've ever shared my writing here before but, well. Rewards of being loved, mortifying ordeal of being known.)

Snippet under the cut because I am an awkward porg:

Mira whirled away and slammed her tablet down on the desk. "Stop lying to me!" The room went deadly silent save for her own hitching breaths, heaving under the steady white noise of the air cycler. "I do not make a habit of lying," V'therin finally said, voice low, every word deliberately measured. No, not measured, clipped, and she flinched; the last time she'd heard that carefully controlled fury, someone had rightfully ended up with a knife through their eye socket. "I especially do not lie to those I care about." "I know." It was barely a whisper. "Then I trust you have a reason for making such an accusation?" "Because it's either that or you're being willfully ignorant, and you're too smart to not see how this all ends." Mira's hands were trembling, the motion starting to move further through her limbs, and she couldn't keep her voice from shaking as she turned back to face him. "I screwed up, Vee. Don't you get it? I got them killed. They're dead, and it's my fault. Your Council will never, ever let me go back to Laethan space, and I can't bring them back, I can't fix this, so just stop -" She made a horrible choking noise and sank down onto the bunk, burying her face in her hands. "Please stop pretending everything is going to be okay."

Ahhhh, delicious, delicious angst. This was one of those scenes where the core of it slam-dunked itself in my brain like Athena stepping fully-formed from Zeus' mind. I may not ever get it to fit into a story proper, but it was one of the earliest scenes that came to me as I was noodling around with this cast and setting - ironically, before I'd even settled on their dynamics, which meant I ended up working backwards based on wanting to end up with the connection that could potentially lead to this scene.

The trickiest thing for me here was navigating the dialogue and really nailing the wording. I knew the core of it, and I knew Mira's first and last lines from the jump; most of the work went into the back and forth in the middle, massaging out the wording and rhythm to keep the tone and pacing and carry the emotion of the scene through.

What it came down to was that advice I read somewhere about "pretend your character can't say exactly what they're thinking or feeling" and applying that to both of them. It's an unbelievably shitty situation, they're both having some Big Feelings, and figuring out how they navigate that grief and guilt both individually and together and how it bumps up against their personality and different cultures (Vee is an alien, which isn't made explicitly clear in this snippet) until it sounded the way I wanted it to was the biggest challenge.

Thanks for asking!

Weird Writer Asks