#LOOK AT THOSE FUCKING CROOKIES

[madstronaut]

french bakeries are culinary equivalents of brothels to me and brother je suis chaudddddd

I would have gotten a crookie but now in my elder millenial era, too much sugar gives me a migraine 😵‍💫

[csmeaner]

Design Shitting: That One Particular Designer Special Edition

Those PalletEclipse designs still haven’t found a sucker yet (the suckers are running late). I think this batch has actually just broken the record for her Crookies. Those sold in about a month and a half and as of this writing the “Varmints” are still awaiting homes. https://deviantart.com/palleteclipse/art/Skire-Adopts-Various-Varmints-2-5-OPEN-924580968

another post before about those same adopts

and here originally

The reason I made this a submission instead of an ask is because there’s something fucky about Pallet’s designs and it’s made me respect her a lot less. Follow me here, Mod Shit.

Goose, Goose, Duck? and Fowl Play from palleteclipse(/)art(/)https://www.deviantart.com/palleteclipse/art/CCCat-Adopts-Blue-Ribbon-Batch-0-4-CLOSED-850473570 aren't terrible. Overpriced, lower art quality, and not exactly ground-breaking/boundary-pushing? Oh, for-fucking-sure, but just look at the designs on their own. Decent colors, decent use of traits, kind of a nice tail on Fowl Play. Some unity with the themes. And hey, someone else pointed out people don’t really want ground-breaking “unique” designs most of the time. Anyway, these are from two years ago.

https://www.deviantart.com/palleteclipse/art/CCCat-Adopts-Holly-Jolly-Times-0-3-CLOSED-863055179 Reindeer Royalty is passable. Overpriced and questionable on the quality of art for price, but passable and people buy for the design anyway. Precious Peppermint is OK for people who like “ugly sweater” holiday designs.

Stitched Creation reminds me of a Rottweiler somehow and I love it. Graveyard Leaves is pretty good, too, though those colors won’t be for everyone. Again, two years ago. The art is decent enough I wonder if someone gave her a base. I also almost thought someone else drew them and she was just hosting them, but one of the comments complimented Pallet specifically and the art has her watermarkhttps://www.deviantart.com/palleteclipse/art/CCCat-Adopts-Halloween-Vibes-0-4-CLOSED-854884601

https://www.deviantart.com/palleteclipse/art/CCCat-GA-Adopts-Pastel-Cafe-0-4-CLOSED-783954204 Bunny Sprinkles and Piebald Cave are decent, again with all the caveats about pricing, art quality, etc mentioned earlier, back in 2019. (Actually, I really like Piebald Cave.)

Then you have the Crookies from April. palleteclipse/art/https://www.deviantart.com/palleteclipse/art/Skire-Adopts-Freshly-Baked-Goods-CLOSED-911093722

And these sad sacks of shit from February. https://www.deviantart.com/palleteclipse/art/Skire-Adopts-Astronomical-Endeavors-CLOSED-906524345

I used to give Pallet the benefit of a doubt. But after seeing that she can do better than she usually does? I think she doesn’t give a flying fuck, and because her art isn’t 100% there yet, it looks that much worse. She’s the Kandy-Kube of Skire. Some sucker always comes along, so why care?

99% of adopt artists would have redesigned the two Varmints that aren’t selling by now. (Or reduced the price.) But Pallet? Nope. I think she’s nicer than a lot of CS staff, so I used to feel a little bad for her, but now I don’t. She has the capacity and she’s had the time.

bitch has stopped fucking trying and it shows

[tomarkstories]

This time I cannot run

(So this is a re-post of an old tomark fic from like 2012 I took down a while ago)

A one-shot tomark fic. Mark knows that we know.

They knew. They totally knew. Was it really that obvious? They tried to joke about it all the time but apparently, some people looked right through them.

The venue was big. There was a balcony going across the room where the fans with seating tickets were. A banner (probably made of paper or fabric) was hanging from the middle of it. The big letters painted in black read ”JUST KISS HIM, TOM”.

This,

had gotten too far.

Tomark. Tomark exists. Tomark tomark tomark. It was everywhere on the internet. Small, moving pictures they called ”gifs” with him and Tom expressing their love for each other in interviews. Photos fans had worked hard on to change Skye’s face to Tom’s. ”Every AVA song is about Mark” and ”every +44 song is about Tom”. They had no idea how fucking right they were.

Mark once even read a fanfiction. A small story about himself and the sexiest man on earth, Thomas, obviously. It had been about how they took care of ”stuff” before a show. Had turned him on a lot.

Travis was almost done with his drum solo. His hip hop stuff both confused and amazed him and Tom since they weren’t into that stuff at all, but not even the biggest punk rock fan would disagree to the fact that watching Travis play those drums was extremely powerful and almost magical.

The crowd had been crazy that night at Brixton Academy. Those London people were always crazy. The band hadn’t been there for over one year. Rumours said they had sold out the show in only fifteen minutes. And that was huge if your name wasn’t Justin Bieber.

Another great thing about that one night was that Tom was sober. Not even a little drunk. This made his voice sound so much better, and he was still as funny as when he was drunk.

There it went. Travis pulled off his last beat and the venue went all dark while people screamed and screamed and applauded and screamed. It was time for Mark and Tom to get on stage again to finish the show off with Dammit followed by Family Reunion. Confetti would soon fill the room. Mark smiled because he knew it was the kids’ favourite part of the set. Jack always went crazy when the confetti started pumping out, he would even start dance some nights, and that kid was usually really shy about that kind of stuff.

Mark was just about to walk out on stage again when someone grabbed him by the wrist. He quickly turned around, expecting to face their backline guy.  It was Tom. He wore his Gibson around the neck and that big, crooky smile on the lips. ”Mark….” He said quietly, almost whispering, and smiled even bigger.

”What is it, Tom? We have to get out there again..” He answered and immediately felt very boring and grown up with that kind of answer. They could do what the fuck they wanted to. It was their show. Maybe they should bring back the flaming ”FUCK” sign. Mark smiled when memories from old, good times started rushing through his mind.

Tom kept the smile on his face and pulled Mark closer, still by just his wrist. His instrument touched with Mark’s white fender.  He leaned over and put his lips close to Mark’s right ear, still holding his wrist. Mark could feel Tom’s breath in his ear. He immediately felt blood rushing through his body. Blood pumping in particular parts of his body, making things grow... ”Why don’t we just… you know.. do it? The sign, you know” Tom whispered after a few seconds of what seemed to have been him doubting whether he really should say it or not.

So. Tom wanted to kiss him tonight in front of thousands of people. Nothing weird with that, eh? They sure would make a lot of people happy if they did it. Actually, Tom came with stuff like that at almost every show they played. He’d always try to kiss Mark, or even just hug him. Mark would always just laugh it away. There wasn’t much that embarrassed him in life but when Tom started doing those things to him in public, he just couldn’t. He got so nervous every time it happened. They had been so so so close revealing it many times. There were tons of interviews up on the internet where they had been only a few seconds away from kissing each other. Then Mark would start laughing, come up with a funny comment or just simply lean away from Tom. He was scared and it was the lamest thing ever.

Tom suddenly tightened his grip around Mark’s wrist. He leaned over even more and their lips were only a few inches away from each other now. ”Come on.. Maaark” he whispered, almost in a moaning voice which made Mark crazy. Tom’s breath on his lips. ”This time you cannot run…” He continued, still whispering, in that exact same tone as in Not Now where he sang the almost identical line. He could easily kiss Tom right now. It was dark and no one would notice. Their families had gone backstage, except Travis’ kids that were still hanging around his drumset like they always did. The crew were busy doing work on stage and they were already used with them two fooling around with each other. Of course, they took it as a joke and didn’t see the fact they were two grown, married men, seriously in love.

Mark closed his eyes for a few seconds and opened them with a smile on his lips, which was still just a few inches away from the guy facing him. Anything that would’ve felt embarrassing or weird just fell away as soon as he met Tom’s eyes. Those beautiful brown, thin, eyes that were so full of life, always. The crooked, mischievous smile that he’d fall for every time though he’d seen it every day for over 15 years. He sure missed the lip ring but could easily say that he would look fucking ridiculous with it now. And the cheeks. Those bruised cheeks he used to have all those acne problems with. They were wonderful no matter what, and he loved feeling them against his.

Light.

Lights and thousands of faces.

They were supposed to be out on stage right now. ”I’m sorry” Mark casually said and broke their eye contact. He got out of Tom’s grip and put his hands over the bass and walked out on stage, welcomed by the crowd. He didn’t even look back to see Tom come after him.

Dammit became a mess. Tom fucked up almost every second of the song and Mark, he forgot the whole second verse. Travis however,  was totally flawless as always. Their families were sitting at the side of the stage, looking a bit bummed out. He could feel how the confetti confused Tom even more and God, they hadn’t been this bad since the reunion shows in 2009. He was almost embarrassed when the last riff of the song went out and the crowd started cheering. They had not deserved that.

Tom had turned his back on the crowd and took off to his guitar tech. Mark started to get nervous. They always knew what to say between the songs but it was empty at the moment. He couldn’t joke about something, he would just feel really stupid in this situation.

Come on Travis, start a beat. This awkward silence makes me crazy.

”So…” Mark finally said in the microphone. The crowd cheered . ”I… I just..” he continued but couldn’t find the words. He let go of the microphone and put his hand on his forehead instead, staring down at the floor.

I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you.

All he wanted to do was to do make things right but what instead came out of the microphone a few seconds later was his worn out voice almost yelling the oh so meaningful lyrics about shit and piss and fuck and cunts and cocksuckers, motherfuckers, tits and farts and turds and twats.

And that’s exactly what would happen tomorrow. And the day after tomorrow. Next week.  Next year. Forever.

[pawnshcpdevil]

cauticnarytail:

If she weren’t in immediate danger of getting her head pumped full of silver, Bianca just might have rolled her eyes out of pure exasperation at Jersey’s reluctance to lower his weapon. Not wanting to set the ex-pawn shop owner off though, she merely nodded her head in understanding and shifted the weight on her feet. 

“Fine. Just don’t be afraid to holster that thing if your arm gets tired, you definitely won’t hear any complaints from me.” Bianca crossed her arms across her chest. “I came looking for you ‘cause I want to know what you did with all the merchandise from the pawnshop after you ran. Bigby and the spooks from the Woodlands ransacked it a couple days after they dealt with Crooky, but came up empty handed. Since you’re planning on fading back into obscurity soon anyways, I doubt you’ll be needing any of it, right?”

   “Don’t hold your breath.” Which felt ridiculous to say to someone with such a lung capacity as the Big Bad Wolf. But he went and said it anyway. He wasn’t planning on lowering his gun any time soon. 

Though it does fall a bit as she says what she here for. The audacity. “And what makes you think I did anything with ‘em. Like I had a chance. Go ask the fuckin’ Tweedles! Or what’s left of ‘em at least. My bet’s those fat fucks went and looted the place while Bigby was off disembowelin’ and decapitatin’ his way to justice. A bunch of scavengers those two. Bottom fuckin’ feeders. Opportunistic..Well I think you get the fuckin’ picture. 

He of course had his own hoards spread out, things he didn’t have up for sale in the shop or stored in the back. Trinkets here and there, mostly useless and just hoarded for their aesthetic pleasure. But he had known better than to keep all his eggs in one basket. 

      “So I’m tellin’ ya. I ain’t got shit.”