#Kratos has the solution to religious trauma

[incorrectsmashbrosquotes]

Me: *bolts awake at 3 AM* BALDUR'S GATE 3 AU WHERE, THROUGH DIMENSIONAL SHENANIGANS, KRATOS ENDS UP OCCUPYING THE ROLE OF TAV!

THINK OF IT! JUST THINK OF IT!

Companion: So any that's how that God/Being of incredible power ruined my life.

Kratos, noted Godslayer, planning how he's going to destroy yet another pantheon for these weird little mortals he's found himself in charge of: Tell me more.

*later*

Gale and Astarion: Becoming a God would fix me, I promise!

Kratos: *knocks their heads together like the Three Stooges* No.

His favorite companion is actually Jaheira because she's one of the only ones who knows how to shut the fuck up and he bonds with her and Minthara over shitty jokes and grunts of displeasure.

Mizora takes one look at him, recognizes that Wyll and Karlach are now hanging with THE KRATOS and hides in the depths of Avernus for the rest of the game.

He is hella distrustful of Selune when Shadowheart starts worshiping her instead of Shar but Dame Aylin seems alright so he's okay with it for now even if he's watching every statue of Selune they pass with a suspicious eye.

Lae'zel is now his daughter. He takes one look at this angry, disagreeable little murder-hobo and immediately starts carrying her around in a baby-backpack even as she tries to bite his face off like a feral racoon.

He's actually hella sympathetic towards Ketheric Thorm because... like... yeah...

His endgame is leading a crusade in Avernus to kill Zariel with Karlach, Wyll, Minthara, Dame Aylin and Isobel with him. And once Zariel is dead, Shar, Mystra, and Vlaakith are next on his list.

DO YOU SEE MY VISION?! DO YOU?! KRATOS BEING THE AWKWARD LEADER OF THESE LITTLE MORTAL FREAKS HE SEES A LITTLE BIT OF HIMSELF IN ALL OF THEM AND DECIDES TO HELP THEM WITH ALL 5 OF HIS B+ PARENTING SKILLS!