#Kids haircut in Los Angeles
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hanrylucas · 2 months ago
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Barber Shop Los Angeles | Expert Mens Haircuts, Beard Trims & Buzz Cuts
Los Angeles is a city that values style and self-expression, and for many men, finding the right Barber Shop Los Angeles is an essential part of their grooming routine. Whether you’re looking for a clean and sharp Mens Haircut Los Angeles or a simple yet effective beard trim, these barbershops offer a variety of services to help men look and feel their best.
In this article, we’ll explore what makes a Barber Shop Los Angeles special, from classic styles to modern cuts. We’ll also highlight popular services like beard trims, buzz cuts, and general haircut services that have made Los Angeles a go-to destination for men’s grooming.
Why Choose a Barber Shop Los Angeles
A Space for Personalized Grooming
One of the key features that sets a Barber Shop Los Angeles apart is the level of personalization in the services provided. Unlike large, commercial salons, a Barber Shop Los Angeles often focuses on providing individualized experiences for its clients. Barbers take the time to understand your preferences, your hair type, and your desired outcome. Whether you're looking for a fresh Mens Haircut Los Angeles, a trendy beard trim, or a classic buzz cut, the expert barbers are trained to tailor each service to your specific needs.
The vibe in these barbershops is relaxed and welcoming, offering clients the chance to unwind while receiving top-notch grooming services. These shops are not just about getting a haircut—they are about creating an experience where men can feel at ease, chat with the barber, and leave with a new look that fits their personality.
Expertise in Mens Haircut Los Angeles
When it comes to Mens Haircut Los Angeles, the barbers in LA are highly skilled in a variety of cutting styles and techniques. Whether you're looking for a sleek, professional cut for the office or a trendy, more casual look for the weekend, a Barber Shop Los Angeles is equipped to deliver.
Many barbers in Los Angeles specialize in modern cuts like fades, pompadours, undercuts, and textured top cuts. But the skill of a true barber goes beyond just following the latest trends. A Mens Haircut Los Angeles is all about finding the right style that fits your face shape, hair texture, and lifestyle. A skilled barber will not only execute the cut but also offer advice on how to maintain it in between visits, making it easy to keep your look sharp at all times.
Popular Services at Barber Shop Los Angeles
Beard Trim: Defining Your Facial Hair
A well-groomed beard is a statement, and the Barber Shop Los Angeles knows exactly how to help men maintain and enhance their facial hair. Whether you're sporting a full beard, a goatee, or a neatly trimmed stubble, the beard trim is an essential grooming service for many men.
At a Barber Shop Los Angeles, the beard trim is executed with precision. Barbers are equipped with the right tools to trim, shape, and style your beard to complement your face shape and desired look. They take into account the thickness, length, and shape of your beard to ensure it looks neat, defined, and flattering. Regular beard trims not only keep your facial hair looking sharp but also promote healthier growth by preventing split ends and encouraging proper maintenance.
A Beard Trim is often paired with other services like a haircut service or a scalp massage to give you the complete grooming experience. With the right attention to detail, your beard can be a defining feature that enhances your overall style.
Haircut Service: Classic and Modern Styles
The heart of any Barber Shop Los Angeles is its haircut service. From classic cuts to trendy styles, a haircut service in Los Angeles is more than just a quick trim—it’s an opportunity to revamp your look with the skill and precision of a professional barber.
One of the most popular services in a Barber Shop Los Angeles is the fade, a style that blends short sides with a longer top for a smooth transition. Fades come in various styles—high, low, and mid fade—and are customizable to suit your preferences. The ability to choose from different fade types makes this haircut service versatile, allowing for both clean, professional looks and more casual, edgy styles.
Another common service is the pompadour, which features voluminous hair on top with shorter sides. This classic cut has been revamped with modern twists, making it a favorite for men seeking a bold yet sophisticated look. The Barber Shop Los Angeles excels at these classic styles while keeping them fresh and in tune with contemporary trends.
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Buzz Cut: Simplicity with Style
For many men, the buzz cut is the go-to style. It’s simple, sleek, and easy to maintain, making it a popular choice for men with busy lifestyles. A buzz cut involves trimming the hair to an even, short length using clippers, providing a clean and no-fuss look.
A Barber Shop Los Angeles takes the buzz cut to the next level by ensuring it’s done with precision. The key to a great buzz cut is evenness, and professional barbers are trained to create a uniform length all around the head, with clean lines and sharp edges. For those looking for a more customized buzz cut, barbers can tailor the length to suit your face shape and personal style.
The buzz cut is also versatile in that it can be combined with other elements, such as a fade or line design, to make it more distinctive. It’s a low-maintenance yet stylish option that can work for many men, from professionals to athletes.
Why Choose a Barber Shop Los Angeles
High-Quality Services at Every Visit
One of the most compelling reasons to choose a Barber Shop Los Angeles is the consistent high quality of service. Whether it’s your first visit or your tenth, you can expect the same level of attention to detail and expertise with every visit. The barbers here take pride in their work, ensuring that every Mens Haircut Los Angeles, beard trim, or buzz cut is done to perfection.
The tools and products used in a Barber Shop Los Angeles are of the highest quality, ensuring that the results are both long-lasting and satisfying. Barbers use the best clippers, scissors, razors, and grooming products to achieve the desired style, ensuring a flawless finish every time.
A Comfortable and Relaxing Environment
Another reason to visit a Barber Shop Los Angeles is the welcoming and relaxed atmosphere. These barbershops are designed to be places where men can unwind and enjoy the grooming process. The ambiance is often casual and laid-back, providing a perfect escape from the hustle and bustle of everyday life.
The comfortable seating, great conversation, and sometimes even the soothing background music all contribute to making your grooming experience feel like more than just a haircut. The environment allows you to sit back, relax, and enjoy the experience while getting a top-notch haircut, beard trim, or buzz cut.
Building Relationships with Your Barber
Visiting a Barber Shop Los Angeles is also about building a long-term relationship with your barber. Over time, your barber gets to know your preferences and can recommend cuts that suit your style, face shape, and hair type. Many men find themselves coming back to the same barber for every appointment, creating a sense of continuity and comfort.
Whether you’re in for a routine Mens Haircut Los Angeles, a beard trim, or trying a new buzz cut, your barber will be able to provide personalized recommendations based on their knowledge of your past styles and preferences. This ongoing relationship ensures that you always leave the shop looking and feeling your best.
Conclusion
A Barber Shop Los Angeles offers much more than just a haircut; it provides a complete grooming experience. From expert Mens Haircut Los Angeles services to precise beard trims and the ever-popular buzz cut, these barbershops cater to every man’s grooming needs with style, precision, and attention to detail.
Whether you’re looking for a classic cut or a modern style, the Barber Shop Los Angeles is the ultimate destination for men’s grooming. With personalized service, skilled barbers, and a comfortable atmosphere, these establishments are more than just places to get a haircut—they are places where men can relax, refresh their look, and leave feeling confident.
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notapradagurl7 · 7 months ago
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Is this real?
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Summary: You were attending a carnival and noticed Eazy E came to you on the Ferris wheel, the two of you. (woman dressing up as a guy trope)
(takes place in 1993)
(Requested by @bina-bitch )
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She decided to head to a carnival after hearing that Eazy E was in town. Making her way through the crowd of people, zipping up her jacket from the cool breeze across her face. The soft crunching of her shoes on the green grass and the soft laughter of children filled the air.
Instead, it was a traveling amusement park in Los Angeles. She loved going to these every summer, it was fun.
But the young woman disguised herself as a guy so Eazy wouldn't notice her from the last concert she attended, she was fangirling at the rapper so much that it put a smile on his face.
Her eyes gazed out of the window of the Ferris wheel and felt the wind across her face. It was so peaceful.
She went by the nickname Joey, but her given name was Jodie. Standing at a height of 5'3", she sported a pixie haircut with curly spirals that beautifully framed her face. Dressed in a black hoodie and coordinating sweatpants, she completed her outfit with simple white shoes. Notably, she had a distinct eyebrow slit on her left brow. She was flat chested as well.
After the ride stopped gradually, her eyes noticed Eazy E getting on the ride where she were sitting, awestruck that he was in her presence.
“What’s up?” He greeted them kindly, giving her an upward nod.
“Hello there, I’m doing good.” Jodie greeted back, smiling. Deepening her girly voice.
“So, you like amusement parks too man?” Jodie asked him, her
brows raised.
The young rapper’s brows raised in confusion, “Uh..Yeah, I do, I always went to them when I was a little kid.”
As the ride began, he looked out of the window and his eyes flickered toward Jodie again. Something about Jodie threw him out a bit.
She's afraid that he might see her as a fan who is overly fixated, and she doesn't want him to think of her that way because she happens to be carrying a picture of him in an unexpected location.
The ride was over, he walked beside her and noticed a picture of him.
Jodie had a picture of Eazy E from the concert he had signed for her, it made her happy. He noticed her hugging the signed picture of him. her face twisted up at him quickly.
Eazy caught on quickly and asked “Are you a lady?”
Crossing her arms at the rapper and asked, “Why would you want to know?”
Jodie couldn't help but sigh in defeat at the question, there was no point in hiding it anymore. It was time for the truth.
Obviously, the rapper knew it already but he tilted his head as Jodie took off her hat. Revealing the woman. “Yes. I'm a woman.”
Giving up the facade too quickly after pretending.
His eyes squinted at her again for another look and smiled at her. Eazy E chuckled, “I had a feeling. You can’t fool me, but I appreciate the effort. So, what’s your name?”
“Jodie, but everyone calls me Joey,” she replied, feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness being so close to one of her idols.
“Well, Jodie, it’s nice to meet you. What brings you to the carnival today?” Eazy E asked, leaning back in his seat.
Jodie blushed slightly, feeling a bit starstruck but tried to keep her cool. “I heard you were in town and I just had to come see you. You’re one of my favorite rappers.”
Eazy E smiled, flattered by her words. “I appreciate that. It’s always great connecting with fans. How about we grab some cotton candy and talk some more?”
He gave her the picture back and she snatched it from him, “You weren't supposed to see that! Give it back!” She called out in a feminine voice.
Jodie’s eyes widened in surprise, feeling like she was in a dream. “Is this real?”
Eazy E chuckled, “As real as it gets, Joey. Come on, let’s enjoy the carnival together.”
As the ride gradually stopped at the bottom, Eazy opened the door for her as she left the ride and he followed behind her.
“What is your name again?”
“Jodie”
After he snatched it, he wrote down her name, writing something sweet and ending it off with his signature. After giving it back to her and Eazy pulled her in for a hug, pecking her cheek.
And so, Jodie and Eazy E spent the rest of the evening laughing, talking, and enjoying the carnival rides together. He brought her cotton candy and smiled at her as she ate it. It was a night she would never forget, feeling like she was living in a surreal moment with her idol by her side.
———-
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watchmenanon · 2 years ago
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THE ‘STRANGER THINGS’ BOYS ARE OUR ‘NYLON GUYS’ SEPTEMBER 2017 COVER STARS
If anyone understands the sudden shift from “not fitting in” to “one-million-plus followers,” it’s these guys.
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The following feature appears in the September 2017 issue of NYLON Guys.
Finn Wolfhard just couldn’t resist. Despite needing to be camera-ready for his NYLON photo shoot, the 14-year-old star of Stranger Things decided to suck on a blue Warhead anyway, and now he’s paying the price. “All these sets have candy on them, and I can’t help myself. It was a mistake,” he admits, sheepishly trying to scrub the cerulean stain from his tongue with a miniature toothbrush. To his right, Gaten Matarazzo wears a gray T-shirt that reads, uh oh! did my sarcasm hurt your feelings?, a slogan worthy of Dustin Henderson, the lovable wisecracker he plays opposite Wolfhard on the hit Netflix show. Matarazzo, also 14, is getting his trademark tangle of curls straightened, much to the delight of Noah Schnapp, who, at 12, is the youngest in this group of breakout stars that has helped make Stranger Things the most obsessed-over show in Netflix’s boundless roster of original series. Missing is Caleb McLaughlin, the energetic 15-year-old who plays Lucas Sinclair, but he’s on his way over in a black car, having just arrived from Los Angeles, fresh off an appearance at the BET Awards.
It’s the first time the boys have been together in several weeks, and none of them can pinpoint exactly when they were last in the same room. Ever since Stranger Things became a cultural phenomenon last summer, they’ve been swept up in a whirlwind of red carpets, talk shows, and fan conventions. And as the premiere of the sci-fi and horror fantasia’s top-secret second season nears, this summer has been overtaken by a flurry of promotional duties. Next week, while most kids their age are cooling off in pools or testing out the latest in roller coaster technology, Matarazzo and McLaughlin will be at Denver Comic Con, signing autographs and posing for selfies with wide-eyed fans. A few weeks after that, all four will find themselves inside the hallowed Hall H at San Diego Comic-Con, where they’ll premiere the thrilling trailer for Season 2 to rapturous applause.
But on this day, even though they’re technically at work, the boys still find time to goof off. They are, after all, best friends—like brothers, even, they say—and there’s a lot of catching up to do, memes to be shared, and jokes to be cracked. “We used to call Noah ‘Señor Biebs,’” Matarazzo offers at one point, due to Schnapp’s Season 1 bowl cut and its resemblance to the former haircut of a certain Canadian pop star. “He hates it!” he says, just before he sticks his finger into Schnapp’s ear (playfully, of course).
Inside the bright and breezy photo studio on Manhattan’s West Side, publicists abound, but because these budding stars are still minors, there are also parents. It’s an unusual sight, and a reminder that despite having very grown-up jobs, they’re still not old enough to drive. Wolfhard, the Vancouver native who plays Mike Wheeler, is here with his father, as is Matarazzo, who hails from Little Egg Harbor Township, New Jersey. Schnapp and his parents came in from Westchester County, north of the city. When McLaughlin, who grew up in Carmel, New York, finally arrives lugging a suitcase that’s almost as big as he is, he’s accompanied by his father, a burly man in an Atlanta Braves cap who goes around the room with his son hugging the other parents, a reminder of how tight the makeshift family has become since this odyssey began more than two years ago.
Stranger Things premiered as an underdog. Its creators, the twin brothers Matt and Ross Duffer, were unproven talents who had previously written for the Fox sci-fi series Wayward Pines. Except for Winona Ryder’s comeback as a grieving mother searching for her missing son, the cast was composed largely of unknowns and newcomers. But thanks to its double dose of supernatural intrigue and a nostalgic ’80s-tinged glow, along with a miraculous performance by a young British actress with a shaved head, Stranger Things quickly commandeered the pop-culture conversation in a way that few shows have done. In July, the show received a staggering 18 Emmy nominations, including Outstanding Drama Series.
Created by the Duffers in the spirit of the Amblin-era entertainments they were raised on, the eight-episode first season is set in 1983 in Hawkins, Indiana, and unravels the mystery surrounding the disappearance of Will Byers, played by Schnapp, who vanishes in the first episode after an encounter with the show’s resident boogeyman, the otherworldly creature known as the Demogorgon. As Will’s three misfit best friends—Mike, Lucas, and Dustin—embark on a quest to find him, they uncover an alternate dimension they dub The Upside Down, and a sinister government conspiracy that may be responsible for opening it. They also befriend Eleven, the feral girl with telekinetic powers embodied iconically by 13-year-old Millie Bobby Brown.
Stranger Things began filming its second season under very different circumstances than the first. What once felt like a scrappy production free of scrutiny from outside sources suddenly had the mood and atmosphere of a major Hollywood blockbuster. “Netflix knew it would be a good show,” McLaughlin says, “but they didn’t realize how big it would be and that the whole world was going to freak out about it.” Because of that intense interest from both the network and the public, the set suddenly had a noticeable security presence shielding it from nosy onlookers and paparazzi, while network executives showed up to make sure their prized racehorse was galloping along. Suddenly, there were expectations. “We raised the bar pretty high with the first season,” says Matarazzo. “There was a lot more tension on set, in that we really needed to make sure it was good.”
When Season 2 premieres on October 27, a year will have passed since Eleven sacrificed herself to defeat the faceless Demogorgon and save the boys, in the Season 1 finale. Trying to squeeze spoilers out of Wolfhard, McLaughlin, Schnapp, and Matarazzo is useless. Extensive media training, including detailed notes on what they can and can’t discuss, have transformed them into a rare breed: teenagers who can keep a secret. What they can say: Season 2 is bigger, darker, and scarier. There’s also a new character in town, played by Sadie Sink. (According to the Duffers, Millie Bobby Brown was “relieved” to have another girl on set.) “She’s a skater, sort of a punk girl, and she slowly becomes part of the group,” says Wolfhard, who also says his character will be depressed and “a loner” in the wake of Eleven’s disappearance. What they can’t say: pretty much everything else. But it’s not just scoop-hungry journalists who harass them for info. “Whenever you get recognized by fans, most of the time they ask you if you’ve got any spoilers for Season 2, and I’m like, ‘No, none, not at all,’” says Matarazzo. “It’s definitely kind of stressful.”
One of the biggest changes for the new season is the expansion of Schnapp’s screen time. Because his character spends much of the first season trapped in an alternate dimension, Schnapp spent a good deal of time at home in New York while everyone else filmed in Atlanta. “Last year I would drive up to the studio and everyone would be like, ‘Hey, Noah, we’ve missed you! How’ve you been?’” says Schnapp. “This year was a lot easier because last year, I’d have to go in and out of school, and that was hard. This year I could focus.”
Although he’s rescued from The Upside Down, we last saw Schnapp removing a slithery creature from his mouth, a telltale sign that not all is well with Will Byers. For Schnapp, whose character mostly communicated through Christmas lights in Season 1, the new episodes meant new challenges as an actor. “Shawn Levy, one of our directors, was telling me, ‘Noah, you have something really big this season. We have a lot in store for you, and you should get really excited,’” he says. Schnapp felt the added pressure, and would sometimes text his TV mom, Ryder, for extra help with particularly emotional scenes. “We knew we needed a strong actor in case the series moved forward into a second season, because we knew he was going to be a centerpiece,” says Matt Duffer. “We needed not just a good actor, but a really, really good actor.” Schnapp rose to the occasion, according to the Duffers. “Shawn [Levy] was like, ‘We’ve had a Ferrari sitting in the garage all of Season 1, and now the fucking garage doors are open.’”
The Duffers knew that casting child actors, who have a tendency to favor exaggerated performances over naturalistic ones, would make or break their show. “There’s really nothing worse than a bad child performance,” Ross Duffer says. “You couldn’t have any weaknesses, or the eight hours would be excruciating.” Along with their casting director, the Duffers saw what they estimate to be 900 kids, an undertaking they say was easier than it sounds because they could tell within the first few minutes if the actor had what they needed. “You’re looking for something authentic, and most kids don’t have it,” says Ross. “There are the ones that are obviously well-trained, but they feel too Disney, like they’re winking at the camera.” What the Duffers found with their four young male stars were kids who seemed like actual kids.
Matarazzo was the first one cast, his audition so impressive that he found out he got the part on the way back from the airport. “We didn’t really even know who the Dustin character was until we found Gaten,” says Matt Duffer. “He was sort of a generic nerd with glasses. He was a stereotype.” Matarazzo, whose sense of humor inspired the Duffers to transform Dustin into the show’s primary source of comic relief, has grown up with a condition known as cleidocranial dysplasia, which stunts the development of bones and teeth. “We wanted to make a show about outsiders, about kids who didn’t fit in and who were bullied and made fun of,” says Matt. “Gaten was really able to tap into all of that.”
McLaughlin and Matarazzo had known each other from their days as stars in two of Broadway’s biggest shows. Matarazzo portrayed Gavroche in Les Misérables, and McLaughlin played Simba in The Lion King. They’d often see each other in a park frequented by “Broadway kids,” as Matarazzo calls them. “When I found out Caleb had gotten Lucas I was like, ‘Caleb? Where do I know that name from?’” he recalls. Wolfhard and Schnapp established an early connection, too—sort of. “He doesn’t remember me, but I remember him,” Wolfhard says. “Because I asked him what other projects he had done, and he said, ‘I was the voice of Charlie Brown in The Peanuts Movie.’ I was like, ‘What?! You’re Charlie Brown?’ I was so pysched about that.”
Although they had all crossed paths during the audition process, usually around the hotel pool or at chemistry reads, it wasn’t until they arrived in Atlanta to begin production that all four boys, along with Millie Bobby Brown, found themselves together in the same room for the first time. If there was a first-day-of-school feel, it made sense: They met in a classroom, which is where the young cast of Stranger Things still spend most of their time when they’re not filming. That grueling schedule means the only opportunities they get to really mess around are between takes, and sometimes during them. “We have laughing problems,” says McLaughlin. Matt Duffer elaborates: “We definitely have an issue, where we can’t get through a take without someone busting up. They’re always making each other crack up—the number of takes ruined by laughter is in the hundreds.”
Schnapp was at summer camp when Stranger Things dropped on Netflix. He wasn’t allowed to have his phone, but shortly after the series premiered, one of his counselors happened to check his Instagram account—80,000 followers. The next day it was 85,000. “I was like, ‘Wait, what’s going on?’ I think I was at one follower before that,” Schnapp says. Wolfhard also remembers that odd rush of watching his followers skyrocket and realizing his life was changing right in front of his eyes. McLaughlin felt his anonymity evaporate the first time he was recognized. “In L.A., this kid came up to me and was like, ‘Hey, are you Caleb Reginald McLaughlin?’” he says. “And I’m like, ‘What? You know my middle name? That’s nuts.’” 
The connection between the boys is strengthened by the surreal turn their lives have taken, circumstances that most kids their age can’t relate to. When Matarazzo, McLaughlin, and Wolfhard met Barack Obama last October, as guests of the White House’s South by South Lawn festival, the former president, who’s a fan of the show, told them he especially enjoyed their on-screen camaraderie. That bond exists offscreen, too, and has only gotten stronger with every award show and panel. “They really are my best friends,” Matarazzo says. “We can relate to each other a lot more than other people can. People try to understand everything that goes on, but they can’t unless they’ve been there.”
“I don’t think any of the kids would say that our friendship is similar to the friendships they have back home, because it’s not,” says Wolfhard. “No kid has ever really had an experience that I’m experiencing right now—it’s a unique sort of friendship.”
Wolfhard is careful not to bring his work home with him. “If you go home and all you talk about is acting, then you’re a douchebag,” he says. “Your friends don’t want to hear about your professional life, they just want to mess around.” Plus, when you’re 14 years old, talking about work is never cool, even if it involves facing off against a faceless interdimensional demon. The boys are also learning that with a great number of Instagram followers comes great responsibility. “We have to be more cautious with what we say on social media and in public,” says McLaughlin, who was shocked to lose followers after he openly rooted for the Golden State Warriors during the NBA playoffs.
While Netflix has yet to make an official announcement, a third season of Stranger Things is a given, meaning the boys are all but guaranteed to live out their teenage years on one of the most popular shows on television. The Duffers, then, will have to follow in the footsteps of long-running properties like Game of Thrones and the Harry Potter franchise in making sure their child actors don’t grow up faster than their characters. “It’s terrifying,” Matt Duffer says. “I shouldn’t even be highlighting this, but if you watch Season 2, they’ve grown from Episode 1 to Episode 9. I’m terrified one of them is going to have a major growth spurt basically in the middle of shooting. But as long as they’re growing outside of the course of our shooting, I’m not too worried about it, because we just have to build it into our story. As much as you would like to keep some of it more continuous, every time we take a break between seasons, we have to make a year time jump at least.”
All four actors say that they want to remain in show business into adulthood. Wolfhard, who obsessively studies the filmmaking process while on set—he’ll star in the remake of Stephen King’s It, in theaters this month—is eyeing a multihyphenate career as a director, actor, and musician. Back at the photo shoot, Matarazzo and Schnapp gather around his iPhone to watch a video Wolfhard co-directed for a friend’s band, Spendtime Palace. Earlier this year, McLaughlin, who is a trained dancer, played a young Ricky Bell on the BET miniseries The New Edition Story, an experience he describes as “historic.” Matarazzo wants to continue acting, but not forever, and is keeping an open mind about other aspects of the industry. Schnapp, who took his first acting class at the age of six, describes winning the Screen Actors Guild Award for Outstanding Performance by an Ensemble in a Drama Series as one of the greatest moments of his life, and is doing exactly what he wants. (The boys, who describe the awards as “very heavy,” keep them in their bedrooms, except for Matarazzo, who has been meaning to retrieve his from his grandparents’ house. )
“They all love what they’re doing,” says Matt Duffer. “They love coming to set, they love working, they love acting. In terms of the fame thing, it’s a side effect that I think some of them are more into than others. You’re worried about, ‘What if they realize this isn’t their true passion?’ They’re so young. But this year those fears went away. They’re all very committed to this. That’s the important thing, that they enjoy what they’re doing. And that they’re passionate about it.”
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myblogmythoughts86 · 1 year ago
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As Jolie tells it, the concept for her new project was born out of a desire to address conversations around self-presentation and identity head-​on. She recalls one such pivotal family discussion surrounding the Los Angeles premiere of her Marvel movie Eternals back in 2021.
“I don’t tell the kids how to dress. Even when they were little, I just put things in front of them. Nobody has to go anywhere if they don’t want to, and if they don’t want to dress up, they don’t have to.”
On this particular occasion, five of her kids did—enthusiastically—dress up. And so Jolie decided to make their red carpet appearance an experiment in circular fashion, gathering pieces from her closet and letting her children choose. In the pile: a beige box-pleated Gabriela Hearst dress that Shiloh, then 15 and known for her smart suiting and boyish haircuts, opted to wear youthfully tailored to the knee. Zahara, meanwhile, selected a dazzling beaded Elie Saab dress from her mother’s storage, first seen at the Oscars in 2014.
“I went vintage shopping with a few of them as well—I think Knox was wearing all vintage. The cut was quite unusual, quite cool, I thought. I want them to be their own people.”
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pwblogarchive · 6 months ago
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August 2007
August 3, 2007
“please”
i understand everyone has their opinion.
but if you give a shit about this please stop being so devisive.
because our friendships mean more than the way you play us against eachother.
bone structure to heart to voice to love to spins to writing to ideals.
it is the only thing that has the chance of breaking this thing down.
stop tring to tear this apart.
stop your assumptions.
i only hope that our friendship is strong enough to withstand the pressure.
maybe this will get through.
everyone has something important to add and subtract.
you dont have it figured out from a picture or one conversation because we dont from 6 years of this.
please. dont push it over the edge.
going home to chicago to write and spend time making this stronger.
thanks to those who believe and who dont believe. both make sense to me.
posted by xo at 2:16 AM
August 3, 2007
good luck is:
sleeping on tile floors
grudges and hands we hold on to
hours of showers till the heat wont pour anymore
stalled cars looking out into the rain
the sleep that comes moments before the sun freezes our eyes open
hugs that remind you of the fuck that lies beneath them
boxers who fight for sweat
kids who love art but never talk about it
heirs to misfortune
warm naps in the afternoon
mans bestfriend
free love with no inflation
perfect imperrfections
hippies on motorcycles
pulling over the car for no reason
scars
dog teeth
desert skies
black outs on laterns full of fireflies
the opposite of clarity
puddles of sunshine
August 9, 2007
dont waste your time on me.you can hold my hand if you want to.driving backwards through traffic with the pedal to the floor, paddling and diving towards the sand at the bottom of the sea, watching for the glint of teeth in the distance, watching for the flash of silver on the seafloor. engraved with faces i dont remember. you learn about this kind of thing in school.dont make this easy. i want you to mean it.all of my friends are doe-eyed and i feel like i'm holding a ball of dark matter close to my chest - tentacles of freezing and cold wrapping around my neck and forcing my head inwards and sucking me in. gradual descent into madness, depression or indifference. i want to be forgotten so i wont have any standards anymore, or anyone to think about when i drive over the edge. my heart is as cold as the clouds of your breath as you walk through the dark of los angeles. it doesnt snow here, at least not that way. we have white powder mist floating across the skyline and drifting into sleeping brains. instant intoxication without reason.reality is just how you look at the facts. my doe-eyed friends are obsessed with things that i cant understand. i just want to sleep and lose my memory. i just want to breathe cold air for the rest of my life. fuck love. fuck everything. i am absolute and infinite as a single being - my bones will lie petrified in the mountains for thousands of years. when they dig me up nothing will be left of my ridiculous haircuts or stupid smile, just my teeth and my skull and the parts that used to make up my fingers and ribcage. sense and science or fakes and liars. i dont know what to believe except that i can sit in a chapel and feel comforted by the candles and black-robed saints but i cant look into the sky and fall in love with the idea that everything is expanding outwards forever and it will never be finished and it is huge and unbeatable and unknowable.please excuse the rivers blooming in my brain. i dont know how to hold things back and this is the proof. just dont tell me if you feel the same - i dont want to admit that i am human and that i have this big weakness.you can dance if you want to.
Posted by xo at 4:09 AM"
August 12, 2007
i am and it will (love beats the demon)the stars are coming outlook up in the brassy skyand there they are likeblooming pocket change.you bet on somethingyou wish you had10,000 to bet onsomething where the odds are good.i'm betting all those starsyou don't win shit.curled luggage occupants, wrapped around eachother, waiting to be used and thrown awayblankets that thousands have slept in, it's a strange feeling to know that you are tossing and turning and clenching your eyes shut underneath the same sheets someone might have had their honeymoon in.cotton double-beds housing drowsing nods, the winks and blinks of eyes and knives.crystal beautiful snow white, friend of thousands but married specifically to you and you alone. this is my true friend. i wont want to repeat this later but this may be my only true friend.sand trapped under eyelids.no matter how much i brag about a strong wall between me and the cares of the planet, i know that everyone sees through it. you cant be me and be completely cut off from the way the world works - it doesnt add up.i want to be taken as i am and loved regardless of what i've done. strip off my skin and take a walk down the street. tiptoe down the paths of the great, and though invisible i will become as they were. or at least in my mind.in heaven i do not want to be held on a crowd of people who think they know me. i would rather look at them from a passing nimbus and smile knowing what they do not.i would rather know what i have done and get no recognition than for the cosmos to put me on a pedestal. you cant live with that kind of pressure or that kind of adoration without hitting some sort of breaking point.(i'm glad to say that you and i are friends and my offer still stands.)
Posted by xo at 2:50 AM
August 15, 2007
been writing poems for myself lately. different then i would have expected
most of them have homes already but there are a few orphans....
expresso.d.'d brain
nerves screaming
red square green in the sun that wont give up
absin-k
bounced checks and imbalances
the room spins me into a terrible green tornado
shoot my veins full of old birthday cake wax
cos theyve been alone all these years since
what helps get u thru the day
can make you go mad in the night
somewhere between the hell that is the souls of my feet
and the heaven that is the arch of my mind
is the purgatory of my hips
and i find myself floating through its vastness again every single night.
living a single file life is hard
but wives are like long division-
the way you always seem to be need but are
that memory itch just outside of where yr head can scratch
would you take yrself back to heartache if u could have yr teenage smile?
posted by xo at 4:11 PM
August 26, 2007
“wait, johnny marr is in fucking modest mouse?”
mayday mayday. there has been a fire in the engine room. failure lights are up everywhere.
me and you just like always.
lit like leading actors. bright lights hitting your cheekbones in an otherwise darkened room.
this is disaster.
you smoke that last one down until it burns your fingers.
there is a penny spinning the table and twenty dollars broken like everything else in here.
basement apartments feel like funeral homes sometimes.
took the train just like the old days.
my old days that is. the good old days.
the stops are of comfort to me as they count me down.
when it flips from red to purple i know im getting close.
drove home from the train today. sweating out a hoody in august just like the good days.
scary.
i am anonymous to the cars as i drive back to the house i grew up in, cutting down the same streets ive ridden down for almost 20 years- slowing only when i see the house a block before mine, that signifies my victory lap.
i run up the stairs and throw myself on the bed.
i can only think of before this began and after it ends.
my last year.
i cant ever get my head around right now.
"red red wine" is playing on the radio.
i saw a good band last night and thought of good friends-
i only wish i would let my head go to these places more.
im getting sick of saying im sorry.
"i hate you, but have a good night."
Posted by xoat 2:20 PM
August 29, 2007
“current occupation: selling fire in hell”
wolves, oysters, clams and crickets.
its not my fault i was raised by
the world is mine
and im happy as a...
cos my conscience is my guide.
----------------------------
reading about the beatles.
falling back in love with life.
writing music.
make this bigger than a tshirt
or picture.
if we still can.
everything aside i still feel the same.
i truly love you and this, forgive me for when it seems like i dont.
im still trying to figure me out.
ps trying to cast all my worries aside. dylan said the first time he heard elvis it was like busting out of jail. thats how it felt the first time between the highway lines in the van. hope we can al find somethhing that gets us thru the night. uganda, the songs, this love all changed something in my head. hope i can find a practical application for it.
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limoteethw · 1 year ago
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Club 38.8 the baines meter shirt, sweater
Club 38.8 the baines meter shirt, sweater
Talk to the Club 38.8 the baines meter shirt, sweater as you are the parent of your daughters. I take it they are all minors. Usually it is an idea to have the same happen to the perpetrators. I would suggest they send the kids to a hairdresser for a very short haircut and have them pay for your daughters stylist.
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Buy It Now:Club 38.8 the baines meter shirt, sweater
Mickey Mouse X Newcastle Knights 2023 Christmas Ornament
Club 38.8 the baines meter shirt, sweater
Talk to the Club 38.8 the baines meter shirt, sweater as you are the parent of your daughters. I take it they are all minors. Usually it is an idea to have the same happen to the perpetrators. I would suggest they send the kids to a hairdresser for a very short haircut and have them pay for your daughters stylist.
Tumblr media
Buy It Now:Club 38.8 the baines meter shirt, sweater
Mickey Mouse X Newcastle Knights 2023 Christmas Ornament
Matthew Judon New England Patriots Football Vintage 2023 Shirt
SUICIDE AWARENESS Classic T Shirt
Official cereal Killer Shirt
Official Trea Turner Los Angeles Dodgers T Shirt
Simply look at Steve Jobs, the guy who ran Apple so well. He was a Cincinnati Reds MLB Hawaiian Shirt Warm Season Aloha Shirt believer in “natural” medicine, in fact he wouldn’t bathe since he felt this somehow or other weakened him but his fellow workers had lots of problems with this. He developed Pancreatic Cancer nothing may have done him any good but from the little that I’ve found on his case he may have had a rare case, like Ruth Bader Ginsberg, where prompt surgery may have saved him. He wanted to try some “natural treatments” first, he did, and you know how that turned out. Just because you know a lot about a lot of things don not assume that you know everything about everything. He was in many ways a brilliant man in most areas but not in the treatment of pancreatic cancer. The worst part is he got a liver transplant later on when he decided to try regular medicine, something that might have saved someone who really needed it. So sad.
Home Page: Limotees
SUICIDE AWARENESS Classic T Shirt
Official cereal Killer Shirt
Official Trea Turner Los Angeles Dodgers T Shirt
Simply look at Steve Jobs, the guy who ran Apple so well. He was a Cincinnati Reds MLB Hawaiian Shirt Warm Season Aloha Shirt believer in “natural” medicine, in fact he wouldn’t bathe since he felt this somehow or other weakened him but his fellow workers had lots of problems with this. He developed Pancreatic Cancer nothing may have done him any good but from the little that I’ve found on his case he may have had a rare case, like Ruth Bader Ginsberg, where prompt surgery may have saved him. He wanted to try some “natural treatments” first, he did, and you know how that turned out. Just because you know a lot about a lot of things don not assume that you know everything about everything. He was in many ways a brilliant man in most areas but not in the treatment of pancreatic cancer. The worst part is he got a liver transplant later on when he decided to try regular medicine, something that might have saved someone who really needed it. So sad.
Home Page: Limotees
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mysticalrambling · 3 years ago
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Hi this is mine request, y/n and chris (evans) are married and the have 2 kids, Emma and Jason, and y/n takes Emma to get there nails and hair done they have a girls day , while the boys a a boys day at home, and when y/n and Emma comes home, the boys have cooked dinner for the girls and later that night the have a family movie night, in matching pyjama's
A/N: I loved the plot line and I was happy to write about it. This is what I came up with and I might have added a few more things to the plot line. I love dad Chris Evans and I would love to write more about him. Hope you guys like it and please tell me what you think about it.
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Family Time (C.E)
Chris Evans Fanfiction (Fanfiction Master list)
Warnings: None. Fluff all the way.
Summary: dad! Chris Evans x reader. Chris and the reader spends the whole day with their family. They enjoy the free day with their children and enjoy every moment of it.
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Having two kids was a bittersweet experience for the two of you as they were close in age so they fought a lot. It could be over the simplest of things such as who will eat in which bowl or who will cuddle with daddy at night. Emma and Jason loved each other to death but Jason being the elder was sometimes a little too stubborn. The one thing that always came as a shock to Chris’s family was that your son was a total daddy’s boy and vice versa for your daughter. Your family was always a little different from the others and you loved it.
“Mommy, Jacey pulled on my hair and threw my dollies to the ground.” Fat tears poured down her baby blue eyes as she jumped on your shared bed, effectively waking you both up. Chris just groaned and buried his head in the soft pillows and hands placed on his ears. You didn’t blame him, you both were up pretty late last night because Jason had a severe stomach ache. But he was okay now, considering he was busy annoying his younger sister.
“I will scold him but can you lie down with daddy now so I could freshen up and make you guys breakfast.”
“But I want to stay with you-,” she began to protest and you quickly silenced her by promising a girls only day.
“Besides, you don’t want to cuddle with daddy?” Chris growled playfully and started tickling your three and a half year old daughter. Taking this as your cue to leave, you went to the washroom. Meanwhile, Jason also joined the two of them in bed and lazed around for the whole morning, You prepared pancakes and scrambled eggs that was your family’s favorite breakfast and put out some dog food for Dodger.
“I want dad to feed me today.” Your five year old son declared when Emma sat on Chris’s lap to be pampered by him.
You sensed a fight heading towards the dining room and you quickly tried to diffuse the situation. “You are going to spend the whole day with your father today so let him feed Emma, please.” He huffed out a fine and you cut his pancakes in to little pieces.
“I am thinking of taking James to do some grocery shopping and then spend the whole day at home.” Chris was free today because his shooting does not start until Monday and he wanted to spend as much time possible with his family before he gets busy. He always hated being apart from you guys and would feel bad if he missed out an important step in his children’s life because of his career. You guys were truly blessed to have him in your life.
“Yeah, that’s fine. I will get them both ready for the day and then we can all get on with our day.” Pecking him on the lips, you took the kids to your room and Chris went to clean the dishes.
“Mommy, I don’t want to sit in the booster seat. I want to sit with you.”
“No, baby, it is not safe.” She was hell bent on her request today and you just ran out of patience. Snapping at her, you were instantly filled with guilt because tears pooled in her eyes.
“Darling, I am sorry. Babe, can you drop Emma and I at the parlor before going to the supermarket?”
“Sure. Just let me get my keys.” Sitting in the middle of two booster seats was highly uncomfortable but you would do it for your children. The whole car ride was filled with both the kids babbling about their school and day care respectively. Your husband silently made eye contact with you from the rearview mirror and you knew he was thanking you. “When should I pick you both up?”
“I’ll text you half an hour earlier.” Getting Emma out of her seat, you walked towards your favorite salon. You already knew that Emma wanted a mixture of blue and pink nail polish because colors are gender neutral. Chris always made sure that your kids never follow the obscene rules set by the society.
“We are going to have so much fun, mommy.” The little girl skipped towards the reception and stood on her tip toes to see you make the reservation.
“Baby, do you want to get a haircut as well?”
“Are you getting one?”
“Yes.”
“Then I want one as well.” The receptionist smiled at your daughter’s excitement and complimented her saying that she looked just like Chris. Emma puffed out her cheeks and mumbled, “I look like my mommy.”
“Sorry. You are a carbon copy of your mother. Now, I have you two stationed right next to each other and you have manicure first.”
On the other side, Chris sat his little boy in the trolley and marveled at how big he was slowly getting. He had decided to properly pamper his family today and an Italian dinner was just a start. One of the things that you always craved in both your pregnancies was his pasta pomodoro and he sometimes had to make it at three in the morning to satisfy your cravings.
“Daddy, can I get some cookies?”
“Yes, but only one because we don’t want you to have stomach ache.” Chris quickly finished the grocery shopping and then went in to Cartier. Pampering his girls was his top most priority today so he had already ordered a bracelet for you with all of the family’s birth stones engraved in it, He also ordered the same exact bracelet for his baby girl just in a smaller size. Emma always wanted the same exact things as her mother and Chris always tried to fulfill her wish.
“Can we get them some pretty flowers, as well?” Quickly, he wiped all the cookie crumbles from Jason’s face and agreed with him. They decided on getting them some pink roses because you both loved them.
The moment they arrived at the house, they quickly got to cooking but Chris made sure that he went no way near the stove. He was given the task to open up the spaghetti packet and picking out the red carrots.
Meanwhile, you both got your nails done with you opting for a bright yellow colour. Chris’s favorite colour. You got your hair cut in square layers while Emma just got a nice trim for her dirty blonde hair. Both the kids had inherited Chris’s hair and eyes but the nose and the smile was all you. During the whole time, you and your daughter talked about anything and everything. She talked about the cute boy in her daycare and how she wanted to be his friend but she got a whole circus running around in her tummy.You just chuckled and thought to not tell Chris because he will freak out and bully that poor boy.
After about two hours, Chris and James came to pick you both up and the whole way back, both the kids kept bickering with each other. The moment you opened the front door to your house, your favorite aroma hit you and a blissful sigh escaped your lips. “Have I told you this new look suits you a lot?” Your husband took you in a backside hug while both your munchkins ran towards the dining room.
“Just like a thousand times from the moment you picked us up. Is this dinner a hint?”
“Well, it’s true and maybe it is.” You kissed him slowly on the lips because the prospect of another kid was exciting to say the least.
“Daddy, I want the pasta!” Emma screamed from across the hallway and you both made your way towards them. The dining was all set and the kids were already sitting at their assigned places with their plastic forks in hand. Chris quickly served the food and you all got to eating. Dodger was sitting by your chair and happily munching on his food. Making silent eye contact with your husband, you guys silently agreed on having another kid. You were thrilled.
They all went to their rooms and came out in their matching Captain America pjs that Chris bought from Los Angeles the last time he was there for shooting. He always loved the idea of twinning with his famiily.
“We have a little surprise for you, don’t we, Jason?” The boy ran towards the living room and you all followed suit. Chris gave you a bouquet with a red long box and Jason did the same but with a smaller size to his baby sister.
The moment you saw the content in the jewelry box, tears welled up in your eyes. This was such a thoughtful gift and there was an empty place in the bracelet for a new gemstone. “You thought of everything, didn’t you?”
“I am giving you a lot of hints, here.”
“You don’t have to convince me, baby. I was thinking about this as well.”
“Then, it’s done. Baby number three of our family.”
“Thank you, daddy,” Emma jumped on Chris from the back and he immediately caught her in his arms.
“No problem, baby. Which movie do you guys want to watch?” He asked but he already knew the answer.
“Lion King!” There were a lot of things that your kids didn’t agree with but this was an exception. They were both die hard fans of Lion King.
“Aw, I thought we will watch Captain America today. But that’s okay, I guess.” He pretended to be hurt by their answer but the kids took it seriously.
“No, daddy. We love Captain America and we can watch it today.” Little hands cupped his light stubbled cheeks and Chris just smiled at his two babies. He was so lucky to have them and he could not wait for a third one.
“It’s okay, bubs. I was just kidding, We can watch it tomorrow. Today is Lion King’s day.” They all got together under the blanket and kept all the snacks on their laps. This was what Chris wanted the whole day; his whole family under his arms, happy.
“I love you.” He whispered to you while you cleaned off Emma’s sticky fingers and the drool on Jason’s chin.
“I love you, too.” You spent the whole night on that couch and somewhere in between the movie, Dodger came up and cuddled to your side. Your life was blissful and it was all because of Chris, the love of your life.
Hope you guys liked it!!
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A/N: This is just some family dribble that I wrote related to Chris Evans. I just love the idea of dad Chris. Send me some ideas related to Chris as a family man and I will be happy to write about it. Tell me if you wanted to be in the taglist.
Tag list: @maximeevansblog, @justile 
Like, comment and reblog.
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hockey-fics · 4 years ago
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Should Have Seen it Sooner ~ Vince Dunn 
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Summary: You make the decision to go visit your brother, Sammy, after graduating university. But that visit quickly becomes much more than you ever would have anticipated. 
Warnings: verbal arguments, language, smut (nothing overly detailed)
Word Count: `13.5k
A/N: Let’s all pretend that Vince isn’t about to be traded ahahaha...I’m sad. 
Your brother had always been your best friend. Even when you were kids and you refused to do so much as admit you liked him. He was the one who you would run to in the middle of the night when you were six and going through a phase of horrible nightmares. He would walk you back to your room, check under the bed and in the closet and lay with you till you fell asleep again. And when you were a little older and started having bad anxiety at school you would sit in the guidance counsellor’s office and refuse to talk to anyone but Sammy, who they would reluctantly pull out of class to come calm you down. When he had a bad loss in a hockey game he would come home and watch terrible reality tv with you, never wanting to talk about the game. He was the first person to make fun of you when you got a bad haircut but was also the first person to come to your defence when someone else made a comment about it. He picked you up drunk from many highschool parties, promising not to tell mom and dad. You helped him with girl issues, carefully constructing text messages to girls he liked, planning his dates for him and giving him pep talks before those dates. 
So when he moved to St. Louis and seemed to be settling in there for awhile you had to admit you were quite upset. Of course growing up with him in hockey you were used to long periods without him, stretches of time when he was on the road. But him moving so far wasn’t easy for you. Then you moved away for university and while it wasn’t any easier, the distraction of new people, new places, and new experiences was enough to make it more bearable. 
But once you graduated you were back to square one, realizing you were lost without your brother. So you took your degree and ran straight to St. Louis to spend whatever free time you had between graduating university and starting your life and career with Sammy. 
It had been two weeks since you got there, making yourself comfortable in Sammy and Vince’s spare bedroom. You had only briefly met Vince prior to the trip but you were quickly becoming acquainted with him, despite the fact that he spent most of his free time playing video games which you were not about to distract him from. 
“Why are you even going on a date?” Sammy asks, sprawled across the guest room bed with his phone in his hands as you stand on the other side of the room in front of the mirror over the dresser, curling your hair. “You’re don’t even live here.” 
Glancing at him through the mirror you let a strand of still hot hair fall over your shoulder. “Do you only ever go on dates if you’re imagining spending the rest of your life with the person?” 
Sammy looks over at you, his nose crinkling. “Gross.”
“What?” Your eyebrows are furrowed as you set your curling iron down, turning around to look at Sammy. 
“You’re just going on a date with this guy to get fuck-.”
“Stop,” you exclaim, eyes widening. The last thing you wanted was your older brother thinking about your sex life. “No, I’m just meeting people, going out, having fun. I’m not just trying to get…fucked,” you tell him, turning around to look back into the mirror and continue on with your hair. “If that was the case I wouldn’t be putting this much effort into my appearance when it’ll just get wrecked in-.”
“No,” Sammy exclaims, pushing himself up off your bed. “I don’t want to hear it.” Laughing you watch him walk out of your room, shaking his head. 
An hour later you’re in Sammy’s car after he convinced you to let him drive you to your date instead of taking an Uber. “Call me when you want me to pick you up,” Sammy tells you as you climb out of your car. 
“Okay, dad,” you joke, rolling your eyes as you say your goodbye to Sammy, closing the door. 
And call Sammy you did, only it was much earlier than you had expected. The date had gone terribly. It was only twenty minutes into the date, the drinks you had ordered not even at your table yet, when he suggested just leaving and going back to his place. And the suggestive comments didn’t stop, till ten minutes later and you were wondering if he was even going to let you leave at the end of the night without putting up a fight. So you excused yourself to the bathroom, pulling your phone out and dialling Sammy’s number. But he didn’t answer. So you called again, and he didn’t answer. Four more times and you were about to hang up and get an Uber when the dial tone cuts out. 
“He didn’t answer the first ten times, why would he answer now?” It’s Vince’s voice, annoyed but also distant and you’re pretty sure that means he’s in the middle of gaming. 
“Where’s Sammy?” 
“The shower,” Vince tells you, too preoccupied with what he was doing to even so much as question the six, back-to-back phone calls. 
“Can you tell him to come pick me up as soon as he’s out of the shower?” You ask, sniffling as you feel an overwhelming wash of panic come over you. This meant you would have to go back and sit with that man for even longer. “Or, could you just go like knock on the door? Tell him to hurry…please?”
“What’s wrong?” Vince asks, his tone shifting slightly. 
“I…he-he’s weird,” you mutter, anxiously running your fingers through your hair. “Creepy,” you add, making him aware that it wasn’t a matter of simply not clicking on a first date. 
“Text me the restaurant you’re at.”
“What? Sammy knows,” you tell him. 
“I’m coming to get you.”
You wanted to tell him that he didn’t have to. You hated burdening people, hated asking for help. But that was far outweighed by your anxiety about the man at the table on the other side of the restaurant. “Thank you, I’ll text it to you now,” you tell him, saying a quick goodbye before hanging up and texting the address to Vince. 
’on my way’ Vince sends back immediately. 
You spend another few minutes in the bathroom before heading out to the restaurant, slowly making your way to the table. “Hey, I just got a text from my friend. I have to leave,” you tell him, leaving a ten dollar bill on the table, more than enough to cover the drink you ordered but never even got a sip of. 
Outside you stand near the entrance of the restaurant, not wanting to stray too far from the brightly lit entrance. You’re surprised when you see Vince’s car pull up in front of you. Not because you didn’t think he would show up, but because you weren’t expecting him to be there that quickly. Hurrying to the passenger’s side door you hop into his car, silent as you stare out the front window, pulling your seatbelt across your body. 
“That bad?” Vince asks, putting his car back in drive and pulling away from the restaurant. 
“Yes,” is all you’re able to mutter leaning back in your seat, elbow on the window sill as you rest you head in your hand. 
“Too bad,” Vince comments, glancing over at you, “You look good tonight, sucks it was wasted on an asshole.”
Your cheeks get warm, palms sweaty, and you’re not sure why. All you can manage to do is glance over at Vince and mutter a simple, “thanks, I guess.”
The next thing you know you’re in a Dairy Queen drive through and Vince is looking over at you. “What do you want?”
“I didn’t…wait, what?” But Vince is pulling up to the speaker before you have any longer to question it so you tell him what you want and wait in silence till he pulls ahead. “I didn’t realize we were getting ice cream.”
“And we’re going to watch that shitty tv show you’re always trying to get Sammy to watch,” Vince tells you, clearly having already constructed a plan for how he was going to turn the night around for you. 
“Thank you, Vince,” you whisper and he glances over, eyes meeting yours before shrugging casually, as if it was no big deal. But it was. It was a big deal. He had already gone out of his way to pick you up, something he didn’t need to do. Now he was committing to trying to cheer you up. 
Before you know it you’re back at Sammy and Vince’s apartment and Sammy is lost beyond hope regarding the situation. “It’s okay,” you assured Sammy when he asked you about the six phone calls the second you walked through the front door. “Vince came to get me.”
“Why?” Sammy asks, glancing back and forth between the two of you. 
“Because you have terrible timing to go have a shower.” Tugging your jacket off you hang it up on the hook by the door. “I should have listened to you, dating is just a bad idea.”
“Well I didn’t exactly say that,” Sammy mutters, following after you and Vince as you head towards the living room. “What happened?”
“My date was a creep, I called your phone…a few times, and Vince answered after he got annoyed with listening to it ring.”
“I wasn’t annoyed,” Vince chimes in, flopping down onto the end of the couch. 
Rolling your eyes you glance over at Vince, shaking your head. “Don’t lie, I heard how annoyed you were.”
“I wasn’t annoyed,” Vince repeats, eyes locked on yours. 
“Fine,” you comment, but you were still convinced it was a lie and he was just trying not to sound like an asshole after finding out about the situation. “We’re going to watch Selling Sunset, want to join?”
Sammy furrows his eyebrows, glancing over at Vince. “You’re going to watch Selling Sunset?” He asks, directing his question at Vince. 
Walking over you sit down on the opposite end of the couch from Vince, pulling your legs and crossing them as you reach for the remote. 
“Yeah,” Vince replies, looking over at Sammy while grabbing the remote for you and handing it to you. 
Sammy stands in a stunned silence for a minute, staring at Vince in disbelief. He could barely ever convince Vince to let him pick a series and now here he was, willing to watch a reality tv show about Los Angeles real estate. “Okay,” Sammy finally mutters, settling into the love seat on the other side of the room, exchanging silent glances with you. Silent glances that asked, ‘what’s going on?’ But you couldn’t answer, verbally or silently, because you weren’t really sure where this behaviour was coming from with Vince. 
A few episodes later and you decide to put Vince and Sammy, who were trying their best to seem like they actually cared about what was on the screen, out of their misery. “I’m going to head to bed,” you tell them, handing the remote to Vince as you push yourself off the couch, stretching your arms over your head. “Thanks again, for everything tonight,” you tell Vince. 
“Anytime,” he replies, watching as you walk out of the living room and into the guest room down the hall. 
It’s not long before there’s a knock on your door and you look up from where you were laying on the bed scrolling through your phone. Sammy pushes the door open, taking two bounding steps before throwing himself onto your bed. “What happened tonight?” He asks, his tone a serious shift from his actions of throwing himself around like a ragdoll. 
Shrugging you lock your phone, setting it down and adjusting higher on your pillow so you could see your brother without fully committing to actually sitting up. “My date was just creepy…he kept trying to get me to leave with him like 5 minutes into the date.”
Sammy visibly tenses up when he hears this, shifting to sit up as he looks down at you. “So you called Vince?”
“I called you,” you exclaim, laughing as you reach other, grabbing a pillow and swinging it towards him. “But you seemed to think the date was going to last longer than half an hour.”
“I’m sorry,” Sammy tells you, and you can tell that he really means it. Normally you were sure he wouldn’t care about not being able to pick you up at the exact moment you wanted him to. He was your brother after all, he cared, but he wasn’t sweet about it. This was just a different type of situation, you knew it, he knew it, and thankfully, Vince had figured that out too. 
“It’s fine, I just won’t rely on you…ever again,” you joke. 
“That’ll last like twenty minutes,” Sammy replies, laying back down along the foot of your bed. “Till you find a spider in your room and refuse to come back in till I kill it for you.”
“Don’t put that in the universe, that’s so mean to wish that upon me.” 
You and Sammy continue talking till you’re about to drift off to sleep and he sneaks out of your room, like he did when you were six and had a nightmare. 
A couple days later Sammy and Vince had to go on a five day road trip and you considered going home, brought up the idea to Sammy. He pointed out the fact that you had a key to the apartment, you had gotten comfortable there, and it was only five days. So you agreed to stay, relatively easily at that. Because if you were being honest, you missed being around Sammy, and you were happier there than you had been in awhile. 
The morning they were leaving you were saying your goodbyes, hugging Sammy quickly. “Good luck, I’ll miss you. I promise I won’t throw any parties,” you joked. You were used to sad goodbyes with Sammy, after he would come home during the summer and you would have to say goodbye for months. This one felt so different though, knowing it was only a few days apart. It was comforting. 
When you pulled away you looked over at Vince, hesitating a second before throwing your arms around him too. “Good luck,” you told him, his arms tight around your waist. It was different than your hug with Sammy, of course it would be, but you weren’t prepared for just how different. You weren’t prepared for the the scent of his cologne, the way he held you tight to his body, the warmth radiating from him, would make your stomach fill with butterflies. “I’ll miss you as well,” you added, playing it off as a joke, but you knew it wasn’t really a joke. 
Vince had chuckled in response, your body absorbing the way his laughter rumbled through his body. “I’ll miss you too,” he whispered, sending a shiver down your spine with the quiet tone of his voice. He had pulled away, looking at you once more before the two of them headed out. 
You went about your normal routine while they were gone but the quietness of the apartment was starting to get to you around day three, leaving you longing for not just your brother but Vince as well, to be back. So when Sammy told you the time they would be back you went all out, going grocery shopping and picking up all of Sammy’s favourite foods and the few you remember Vince mentioning liking. And you were halfway through cooking dinner for everyone when they got back from their trip. 
“Hey,” you called from the kitchen, sautéing a pan full of vegetables, music playing loudly from the speaker on the counter a few feet away. “I’m making dinner, if you guys already ate I’m going to be sad.”
“We didn’t.” Shockingly it’s Vince who’s greets you first, walking up behind you and leaning over your shoulder to look into the pan. 
“How was the flight home?” You ask, turning your head to glance up at Vince. He’s closer than you expected and you can’t stop the smile that spreads on your face. You’re convinced it’s because you’re just glad to have people around again, and not because you had really started to like Vince. 
“Pretty good,” Vince tells you, stepping to the side to lean against the counter beside the stove. “How was your week alone in my house?”
Rolling your eyes you set the spatula down beside the stove, looking up at him. “Fantastic, your bed is so much more comfortable than the one in the guest room.”
“Oh, really?” Vince chuckles. “I’m willing to share.”
You’re caught off guard by Vince’s comment, unable to come up with a witty response before Sammy is in the room as well. “What are you making?” Sammy asks, walking over and giving you a quick hug before immediately plugging his phone into the nearest outlet and unlocking his phone, typing quickly. 
“Stir fry…who are you talking to?” You ask Sammy, your tone teasing. 
Sammy shakes his head but his little smile tells you that it’s not nothing. “Ooh,” you laugh, stepping away from the stove to try to look at Sammy’s phone. But he pulls it away quickly and the next thing you know you’re wrestling for Sammy’s phone like you’re both teenagers again. “Just tell me,” you laugh, hand grasping for his phone as he pushes your arm back with his free hand. 
“Her name is Anna,” Vince says. 
Pulling back from Sammy you glance over at Vince, shocked at his willingness to let you in on Sammy’s business. “Oh,” you hum, picking up the spatula again to stir the vegetables in the pan. “So, who’s Anna?” 
“A girl I’ve been talking to for a few weeks,” Sammy tells you easily. There was never really any need to keep it a secret, he was just playing the part of an annoying older brother in trying to keep it a secret. “We went on a date a couple days before we left.”
“You didn’t tell me you were going on a date?” 
“I actually didn’t think it would lead to anything,” Sammy confesses. 
“Like Y/N’s dating life,” Vince quips. 
You whip your head in Vince’s direction, gasping at his comment. “You’re an asshole,” you exclaim, laughing. “I’ll let you know, I could have a boyfriend if I wanted…I’m just not trying right now.”
“Seemed like you were trying,” Vince chuckles. 
“I swear to god, Vince,” you mutter, wielding the spatula you were holding with a joking threat. 
“Can one of you shut up so we don’t burn the house down, please,” Sammy chimes in and draws your attention back to the vegetables that were starting to stick to the pan. As you go back to finishing up dinner the boys continue on with their own conversations, discussing things that happened over the trip and the upcoming schedule for the week. 
After you all finish dinner you’re back in the kitchen to tidy up and do some dishes, but Vince is at your side at the sink quickly after. Nudging you to the side Vince grabs the wash cloth from your hand. “I got it,” he tells you. 
“I don’t mind,” you retort, not moving much further away from the beside the sink. “I’m sure you guys are tired.”
“I slept on the flight,” Vince informs you, running the cloth over a mixing bowl in the sink. 
Huffing you step away from him, “fine.” Walking to the cupboard you grab the box of tea you bought a few days prior, taking a mug down as well as you turn the kettle on. “Want some tea?”
Vince chuckles, an obvious enough answer, but he follows it up with “no, thanks,” anyway. “So did you go on anymore dates while we were gone?”
Rolling your eyes you hop up onto the counter while you wait for your tea to steep, watching Vince do the dishes. “No, nobody here was to rescue me if it went poorly.”
“So what did you actually do the whole time we were gone?”
Shrugging you bring the tea to your lips, taking a sip of the hot liquid. “Hung out with some friends a few times, explored the city, watched all your games.”
“Friends?” 
“Yes, Vince, I’m capable of making friends,” you mutter, rolling your eyes. 
“No, that’s not what I meant.” Vince chuckles, glancing over at you. “I just mean, like, you’re just here visiting and you’re still making friends? Where did you meet them anyway?”
“The gym,” you inform him, your voice quiet and deflated. You didn’t really like to think about that fact, about the reality that you would have to make some kind of move soon. You couldn’t live in this vacation-like reality forever. No matter how much you wanted to. 
After the dishes are done Vince heads to his computer to play video games and you head to the living room to watch some TV till Sammy was done unpacking and you could convince him to hang out with you and give you all the details about Anna. 
And two days later Sammy was beyond glad that he had given you all the details about Anna when he sent you a panicky text. The boys had the day off and Sammy had gone out to run a few errands while you were hanging out at the house with Vince. ‘I told Anna I would cook her dinner at my place.’
‘that’s dumb, you can’t cook’ you replied quickly, sitting on the couch and watching Vince play video games. You were trying to be more involved with that after he had started watching the occasional episode of Selling Sunset with you. 
‘that’s not the issue’ ‘I’ll figure that out’ ‘You and Vince can’t be there, it’ll be awkward’ 
Sighing you glance up from your phone screen to Vince. “Vince,” you call, standing up from the couch and making your way across the room. “We gotta go.”
“Where?” Vince mutters, not peeling his eyes off the screen in front of him.
“I don’t know,” you confess while sending Sammy a text to tell him you were on it, to give you twenty minutes and you’d be out. “Sammy is kicking us out.”
“What?” Vince asks, spinning in his chair once his game had ended. 
“He needs the apartment for a date, now hurry up, we’re going out for awhile.”
Vince groans and sets his controller down, reluctantly pulling himself off the chair. “I didn’t agree to this.”
“I agreed on your behalf.” Walking into your room you grab a jacket, your wallet, and keys before hurrying back towards the door where Vince was already pulling on his shoes. “Have anything you needed to get done?” You ask him once you had your shoes on and you were on your way out the door behind Vince. 
“I would have already been doing it.”
Rolling your eyes you reach forward and shove him playfully. “If you don’t stop being an asshole I’ll drop you off at the library for four hours.”
“It’s my car…and I’m driving.”
“No, please, let me drive,” you ask, shuffling quickly in front of him and spinning around so you were facing him. Sammy had given you permission to drive his car while he was out of town and you had loved exploring the city, not really knowing where you were going, just driving. 
“No, I’ve seen you drive.” Vince keeps his hand folded firmly over his car keys, gazing down at you.
“That was one time,” you defend.
“One time we almost died.” 
Rolling your eyes you cross your arms over your chest. “You’re so dramatic, it wasn’t that bad.”
Suddenly Vince has his hands on your arms and he’s spinning you around, pushing you towards the car. “Get in the car,” his voice is filled with urgency and you notice Sammy pulling up towards the apartment parking lot. 
Giggling at the whole situation you hop into his car, watching Sammy pull into his parking stall. Neither you or Vince had to bring up the idea of staying in the car and doing a little light-hearted spying, you were silently on board with the idea. You watch Sammy get out, trying to make it to the passenger’s side of the car to open Anna’s door but she’s already getting out and you watch as the awkwardly fumble around the door for a second. Both you and Vince glance over at each other at the same, bursting into laughter. 
“No, but they are cute together,” you comment through your giggles, watching as they laugh off the exchange, Sammy closing the door behind her. 
“He wouldn’t shut up about her over the trip.”
“That’s cute.” You watch as they head into the apartment building together before turning your attention back to Vince. “What about you?”
“What about me?” Vince turns his car on, putting it into drive and pulling out of the parking lot, no real destination in mind. 
“You must have someone you can’t shut up about…I mean, look at you,” you comment absentmindedly, not really thinking about how it would come across. 
“Are you calling me hot, Y/N?”
“Well,” you hum, laughing as your cheeks redden slightly. “I think it’s like, objective, you know. Anyone would say you’re hot.”
“So you don’t personally find me hot?”
“Oh my god,” you exclaim, shaking your head as Vince simply chuckles. He was really trying his hardest to keep you from getting out of that one easily. “Where are we going?”
“The library, I’m leaving you there,” Vince jokes. 
“Great, books are more entertaining than you anyway,” you quip.
“I was going to take you to get a coffee but maybe not now.”
“No,” you whine, laughing. Vince had clearly noticed when all three of you would get in the car to go anywhere the first time thing out of your mouth was ‘can we get a coffee’? “I take it back then.”
So a few minutes later you’re in the drive through at Starbucks and you don’t even need to tell Vince your order because he has it memorized, which you’re surprised by. He pays for your coffee even though you insist that you can buy it. Then you’re driving again and you end up parked in front of a shoe store. 
“I actually did have something I needed to get done,” Vince tells you, chuckling. 
“Oh, so you were just being rude for no good reason then,” you comment, hoping out of the car after him and walking towards the store with Vince. “Does this mean I get to help you pick shoes?”
“Uh,” Vince mutters, glancing down to your shoes. “No.”
“Take me to the library, you’re so mean,” you whine, playfully pushing his arm. 
Vince laughs, reaching over and grabbing your hand as you push him. “Come on,” he huffs jokingly, pulling you along into the store. And you suddenly can’t focus on anything but his hand, the way it so easily wrapped around yours, warm and secure. But it makes you nervous, the way it causes butterflies to fill your stomach, so you pull it away quickly. 
You’re in the shoe store much longer than you though, Vince taking an excessively long amount of time to make a decision. But you don’t mind because in all honesty, you simply liked being around Vince. Your next stop is for dinner and Vince picks the restaurant, still acting as an unofficial tour guide for you. 
By the time dinner is over you had expected to receive a text from Sammy, letting you know that it was fine to come home. But you get nothing, so you and Vince go get ice cream and drive to a lookout, listening to music and eating your dessert. Your conversation flows easily and you would happily have sat there for hours with Vince, talking and joking. But you get a text message from Sammy shortly after telling you he was taking Anna home. 
“We’re safe to go back,” you tell Vince, pulling your seatbelt back on. 
“Too bad,” Vince mutters. 
“What?”
Vince glances across the interior of the car at you, silent for a second as he tugs his seatbelt on. “It’s just been more fun than I thought this would be.”
“I don’t know how to take that,” you laugh. It was nice to hear he had been having a good time, but you didn’t know if you should be upset that he was anticipating it not being a very good time. 
Vince chuckles, not saying anything else about it as the two of you drive back to the apartment. You’re back before Sammy and you head for the living room, Vince following after you and not putting saying anything as you pick the movie for the night. 
‘going to get an uber now’ 
You had gone out with your new group of friends for the night, one drink turning to two and two turning to a count you had lost long ago. You had been texting Vince all night, though it wasn’t anything new. The two of you had fallen into a routine of texting almost anytime you were apart. He had picked up on your dwindling sobriety throughout the night, as almost anyone reading your messages could have. So when you told him you were getting an Uber he was quick to reply. 
‘I’ll come get you, where are you?’
So you sent him your address, you and your friends paying your bills before heading outside for everyone to wait for their rides. Shockingly it’s Vince who shows up first and your friends are quick to make comments about how none of their real boyfriends were that quick to get there. You brushed it all off, making excuses that he was just a good friend, that he was probably speeding anyway, that you didn’t live that far. Anything to not admit the fact that you and Vince might have a connection that was becoming more than just friendly. 
“Hi,” you greet, cheerful as you climb into Vince’s car. It was so unlike the first time he picked you up and Vince was grateful for that, not just because you were in a better mood but also because it meant you hadn’t been out on a date. 
“How was your night?” Vince laughs.
“Good,” you giggle, looking over at him as he drives back to the apartment. And you can’t help but think about how attractive he truly was, how he made your heart beat just a little faster. He was your brother’s best friend and you knew the feelings you were having towards him were complicated. “Yours?”
“Probably not as good as yours,” he jokes, taking note of the way you couldn’t stop smiling, primarily a result of the alcohol in your system. But there was also a part of you that was just happy to be around him. 
“So anyway, Michael has been staying late at work all the time and Lily is starting to get suspicious about it,” you ramble as you walk through the apartment door with Vince. It’s quiet in the apartment and you realize you hadn’t texted Sammy in awhile, wondering if he was in bed. “Sammy?” You call, stumbling slightly over the edge of the doormat. 
Vince wraps an arm around your waist, steadying you as he laughs. “He’s in bed,” Vince tells you. “What do you need?”
“Nothing,” you admit, clutching onto the arm Vince had wrapped around your waist. “Just wanted to say hi to him.”
Vince chuckles and nods. “I think you should go to bed too.” He gently guides you further into the apartment, reaching over to turn the deadbolt on the door while keeping one arm around you, as if you couldn’t stand on your own. 
“Hey, Vince,” you whisper although you didn’t need to get his attention. 
“Yes, Y/N?” He steps closer now, looking down at you in the silent apartment, waiting to hear what your drunk mind was coming up with. 
“Thank you, for everything, for letting me stay here this long. I promise I’ll leave soon. I know you didn’t sign up to have two roommates.”
Vince smiles softly, shrugging. “Don’t worry about it. I like having you here. I don’t, you know, want you to leave if that’s what you’re thinking.”
“Oh,” you whisper, processing the idea that you weren’t annoying Vince with your extended stay. “I mean it though, thank you.”
“Come on, let’s get you to bed,” Vince says, changing the subject as he guides you through the apartment to the guest bedroom. He hovers near the doorway, clearly wanting to make sure you were settled in bed before leaving you.
You knew he was there, you knew you should ask him to look away if he wanted to stay till you were in bed, but you don’t. Instead you simply pull your shirt up over your head, exposing a lacy black bra you had worn for no real reason except that it made you feel confident. Shimmying your jeans down your legs you toss them aside carelessly. You don’t even look over at Vince as you reach behind you to unhook that bra, missing the way he stood there, stunned and frozen with his eyes on you. You let your bra fall to the ground, your body angled away from Vince as you grab a t-shirt from the dresser. 
“Y/N?” Sammy’s voice calls through the apartment. 
“Fuck,” you mutter, clutching the shirt to your bare chest. Your wide eyes look over at Vince who comically steps back and forth between the wide-open bedroom door, clearly not knowing what the correct move was. “Just close it.” And Vince does exactly that, from the inside. “Vince,” you groan.
“You told me to,” he defends, his hand still resting on the doorknob. 
“From outside,” you tell him. “Now this just looks…weird.”
“Y/N? Are you okay?” Sammy calls through the closed bedroom door. 
“Yeah,” you call back, spinning around to leave your back facing Vince as you pull your t-shirt on, grateful for the size and length of it. “Just getting ready for bed.”
“Okay, just wanted to make sure you got home safe.”
Home. Your eyes flick over to Vince, trying to see if he caught onto the same, subtle insinuation. But he still just looked panicky as he stands beside the closed door. “Yeah, I’m just going to bed now.”
“Can I come in and say goodnight?”
Your heart begins to race as stare at Vince in silence for a second. “Yeah.”
You couldn’t say no, he would immediately know that something was wrong. Sammy pushes the door open a second later and Vince looks to you in panic. “How was-,” Sammy begins to ask when he spots Vince, looking back and forth between the two of you. “What’s going on?” 
You weren’t sure why you felt so guilty. You hadn’t done anything with Vince, it wasn’t a lie to say that nothing was happening, that he was just making sure you got to bed safely. Maybe the reason you felt so guilty was because that wasn’t all you wanted to happen. “Vince picked me up, was just making sure I got to bed safely.” 
Sammy nods slowly, not seeming convinced. “Well I got it from here,” he mutters to Vince, nodding towards the still open door. Vince glances back at you one more time before leaving, the silence in the room painful. “What’s going on?” Sammy repeats once it’s just you and him.
“Nothing,” you exclaim, flopping down onto your bed and climbing under the covers, hoping to make it obvious that you didn’t have anything else to say. 
“You two are getting really close,” Sammy points out. “Are you sure it’s nothing?”
“Yes,” you huff, dramatically yanking your blankets higher up around your shoulders. “Go back to bed.”
“Don’t have to be so moody,” Sammy grumbles, turning off your light and closing the door behind him as he leaves your room. Once he’s gone you lay awake for most of the night, your mind racing with thoughts of Vince. Thoughts you knew you shouldn’t be feeling towards him but the more you tried to think of anything other than him the more vivid the thoughts became till your mind eventually silenced itself completely and you drifted to sleep.
“I’m spending the night at Anna’s place,” Sammy told you a few days later as he was grabbing his keys off the counter and heading for the door. 
Giggling you glance up from the book you were reading, shooting him a knowing look. 
“Don’t be weird,” he comments, chuckling. 
“What do you mean? I didn’t say anything,” you joke, feigning innocence. 
“I don’t know where Vince is, he left while you were at the gym, don’t know when he’ll be back,” Sammy informs. 
“Have fun tonight,” you call as he walks out the front door. 
A few hours later you’ve migrated to the kitchen, finishing up baking some cookies while you were trying to figure out how you wanted to spend the rest of the evening. 
“Hey.”
Jumping you whirl around to face the direction of that the sudden voice comes from. Bringing your hand to your chest over your racing heart you laugh in relief when you see it’s just Vince. “You scared me, I didn’t hear you come in.”
“Sorry,” Vince chuckles, reaching over and taking one of the cookies off the cooling rack on the counter. “Where’s Sammy?”
“He’s at Anna’s place for the night,” you explain, leaning against the counter. “Are they good? It’s a new recipe.”
“Yeah, really good. So we’re alone tonight?” Vince asks, elbows on the counter as he leans against it, eyes focused on you. 
“Can’t believe he left us without supervision,” you joke, pulling the last tray of cookies out of the oven before turning it off. 
“What do you want to do?” 
“Movie night?”
“Sure,” Vince agrees, shrugging as he pushes himself off the counter. “Let’s go pick up dinner first.”
After a quick trip to the grocery store and your favourite sushi restaurant you’re back at the apartment, pouring yourself a glass of wine while Vince was already opening up the boxes of sushi. “Want some?” You ask Vince, gesturing to the wine. 
“Uh,” he hums before shaking his head. “I’ll pass on that,” he chuckles, walking to the fridge and grabbing a beer for himself. 
“Should have figured,” you giggle, putting the white wine back into the fridge.
In the living room you two settle onto the couch to have dinner and pick the first movie of the night. Halfway through the second movie you’ve lost your focus on the plot, eyes on your phone as you curl into the corner of the couch, scrolling through your instagram feed.
“What is more interesting than this movie?” Vince questions, gesturing to the tv and the movie he had picked that was playing on it. 
Glancing up you roll your eyes playfully. “Almost anything.” Scooting down the couch you settle in beside Vince, letting him see your phone screen. 
And within seconds the movie is long forgotten as he chuckles at a meme you scroll by. The transition from Instagram to TikTok is quick and so is the movement from you sitting beside Vince to you being tucked under his arm and leaning into his side. You’re both giggling at the short videos and the time slips by quickly, the credits on the tv rolling and reminding you of the fact that you had planned a movie night. “Do I get to pick the next one?” 
Vince reluctantly hands you the remote, wrapping his arm around you as you rest your head against his shoulder. His body is warm and his embrace is comforting and you know you shouldn’t want to stay like this with him forever, but you do.
The next movie is more interesting but you find it just as hard to focus on with the way you were wrapped up in Vince’s arms. You’re not even sure what compels you to look up at Vince, he hadn’t said anything, hadn’t moved. But he notices and turns his attention to you a second later. “What?” He asks, voice low and rough in a way that makes your breath catch in your throat. 
“Nothing,” you whisper, barely able to make any sound come from your mouth as your cheeks get hot. And you want to say the flushing is from the wine but it only started when Vince’s eyes landed on your and you know he wouldn’t believe your lie. 
“Are you sure?”
You swallow hard, shifting slightly towards him. “I don’t know.”
Vince’s lips curl into a soft smile, eyes lingering on your lips as he reaches forward to brush a piece of your hair out of your face. “Then just show me what you’re thinking.”
It’s an invitation and you know he’s saying it because he already knows exactly what you’re thinking. But it’s risky and you both know that, too scared to make the move when the potential of it ending poorly is so high. But you can’t hold back any longer. So you lean forward, just enough for him to get the message and he takes over, hand around the back of your head as he leans over and kisses you. 
And he kisses you like he’s making every second worth it if things do end poorly. When you pull back your mind is racing a million miles an hour but your body is begging to do it again. You wait a second, hoping Vince would say something. But he doesn’t, and you don’t either, and you can’t think of anything better to do than lean back in and press your lips back against his. This time it’s heated in a way that you had never felt before and you’re climbing into his lap, hips grinding down on him. You weren’t aware of just how badly you needed him to touch you until that very minute when his lips brushed against yours. 
“Are you going to actually share your bed with me tonight?” You whisper against his lips when you finally pull back. 
“I would’ve shared my bed with you any night you wanted.” Vince grasps your hips, gently pushing you away from him and helping you onto your feet before standing up with you. “Are you sure?”
Smiling you lean up, kissing him quickly again. “Yes, of course.”
Vince wraps his large hand around yours, slowly walking you through the apartment. As if he didn’t want to seem too eager, careful and tentative around the whole situation. 
But once you’re in his room, on his bed, Vince is far less careful and tentative. And the night ends with you feeling barely able to move, body having ridden through more highs in one go than you had ever felt. 
As soon as you’re done Vince goes back to being careful, considerate as the two of you shower together and he lets you pick out a t-shirt before curling up under the covers of his bed. 
“Should we have done that?” You finally whisper after laying next to Vince with your head on his chest in silence for what felt like ages. 
“I’m not sure,” Vince admits with an obvious reluctance, running his hand along your bare arm. 
“Sammy was already suspicious of us.”
“I figured,” Vince tells you, sighing. “After the night I picked you up?”
“Yeah…I told him it was nothing…I mean, like, I know it was nothing, but-.”
“It wasn’t,” Vince interrupts, pulling you a little closer and pressing his lips to your forehead. “This isn’t nothing to me, Y/N. If I just wanted a quick fuck I definitely wouldn’t pick my best friend and roommate’s sister, no matter how hot you are.”
“Oh,” is all you can say, caught off guard. “Well then, what does it mean?”
Vince is quiet for too long after you ask, the only way you could tell he was still awake in the dark room was his hand still running up and down your arm. “I have feelings for you, but other than that…I don’t know,” Vince finally mutters. 
“I think we need to give it some time, not tell Sammy this happened yet.”
“Just go back to the way things were?”
“Yeah,” you whisper. 
Vince moves his hands to your waist, pulling you on top of him. 
“Vince,” you exclaim, hands clambering for support till they find his bare shoulders, holding you up as you look down at his silhouette below you. 
“I don’t know if I can do that,” Vince chuckles, his thumbs running along your upper thighs, large hands now wrapped around the backs of them. 
“I think you can,” you assure him, leaning down to press your lips to his. But the fact that you could feel him getting hard again makes you a little wary about whether he really could. “Maybe,” you whisper, moving your hips back as you reach down, wrapping around his length. 
“Fuck,” he groans, head tipping back on the pillow. And the last thing you had expected when you crawled into Vince’s bed after the first few rounds was to be doing it again. But you were making up for lost time. It’s slower this time, both of your tired bodies just searching for another release. And you find it, easier than normal, on top of Vince still in his t-shirt, panties simply pushed to the side. 
When you finish Vince is quick to help you get cleaned up again, letting you remain collapsed on his bed. You can’t stop your heart from fluttering with excitement with him, at how considerate and caring he was. And when he finally settles back down you curl back into his side. “We need to agree on something.”
“Alright,” Vince mutters apprehensively. 
“We can’t hook up when Sammy is here, it’s too risky.”
“Fine,” Vince finally agrees after a couple minutes of contemplation. The two of you drift to sleep very shortly after. 
Your eyes flutter open to a gentle shaking of your shoulder. “Hey, babe, you have to wake up,” Vince says, voice quiet. “Sammy and I have practice in a couple hours, he’s going to be home soon.”
Groaning you roll away from him, head buried in his pillow. “It’s too early.”
“I know,” Vince chuckles sitting on the edge of the bed and running his hand along your arm. “You’re the one who doesn’t want your brother to find out.”
“Don’t act like you want him to know you railed his sister the first time he left us alone,” you mumble, still half asleep. 
“When you put it that way,” Vince chuckles, head whipping towards the bedroom door when he hears the sound of the front door closing. 
“Shit,” you whisper, suddenly fully awake as you sit up completely straight. 
“Just stay here, I’ll tell him you haven’t come out of you room yet this morning,” Vince suggests. 
Nodding you run your hands through your messy hair, anxiety creeping up on you. If you were going to tell Sammy anything at this point you would rather just admit that you and Vince had feelings for each other, not that you spent the night in his bed. 
“Don’t worry, it’s believable. It’s not like you don’t normally sleep in till one in the afternoon.”
Scoffing you roll your eyes, flopping back onto Vince’s bad. “Whatever,” you grumble. “Text me when you two are gone,” you mutter, glad your phone had been in your pocket when you made your way to Vince’s room the night before. 
And when you finally get a text from Vince saying they were gone you pull yourself out of bed, making it behind you before wandering out of the bedroom. The apartment is so quiet and you make yourself some coffee, still just in Vince’s t-shirt. Something about it feels so right, so comfortable. After making a coffee you settle down on one of the barstools at the counter in the kitchen, opening your laptop and navigating to Indeed and before you’re even fully processing what you’re doing you’ve sent out a handful of resumes to jobs in St. Louis. 
After you finish applying to jobs you move on to getting ready for the day. When Sammy and Vince finally get home you feel the weight of so many secrets on your chest. Of not telling Sammy about you and Vince, of not telling Sammy and Vince about applying for jobs in St. Louis. 
“How was your night?” You ask Sammy as he walks into the kitchen, looking up over the top of your laptop. 
“Good,” Sammy replies, grabbing himself a snack from the fridge. “How was yours?”
“Good,” you reply simply, looking back down at your computer.
“Up late?” Looking back up you stare at Sammy for a second, feeling like he was trying to catch you in a lie. “I mean, you were still in bed when I left this morning.”
Nodding you pick up your mug, shrugging. “TikTok is pretty addicting,” you comment, brushing it off as you take a sip of your coffee. “I’m going grocery shopping, do you have anything in particular that you need?”
“Just the regular stuff we keep in the house,” Sammy shrugs, not wanting to have to actually think about it. 
Rolling your eyes you close your laptop and slide off the stool you were sitting on. “Really helpful, can I borrow your car?”
Sammy groans loudly. “What if I wanted to go out?”
“Well do you?”
“I’ll just take you,” Vince chimes in, walking into the room. 
Glancing over your eyes linger on Vince’s for a second, wanting so badly to be able to say something or hug him, something…anything. “Thanks,” you finally mutter, realizing you needed to say something and not just stand there and stare at him. 
“Want to go now?”
“Yeah, sure,” you agree, gathering your things and pulling on a hoodie on your way out the door. Once you’re outside you glance behind you and up at Vince. “So, since when are you so interested in grocery shopping?”
“Since it means being with you…away from your brother,” Vince chuckles, hands on your waist, tugging you to stop and pulling you into him. Leaning down he presses his lips to yours, your head tipped back and to the side, fingers clutching at his arm. 
“You’re not being very secretive,” you giggle, pulling back and looking around the front parking lot of the apartment building. 
“Fine, I’ll wait till we’re in the car.”
Rolling your eyes you get into the passenger’s side of Vince’s car. “We’re going to get groceries…that’s it.”
You drive to the closest grocery story and head inside with Vince, pushing the cart down almost every aisle, the two of you talking and making jokes the whole time. It’s such a mundane task, grocery shopping, but somehow doing it with Vince makes it enjoyable and fun. 
Back at the apartment you lug an armload of groceries inside, seeing Sammy sitting on the couch, xbox controller in this hands. “Thanks for the help,” you call to him sarcastically. 
Sammy chuckles, barely glancing in your direction. “You’ve got Vince.”
Your heart beats a little faster at that comment, dropping the bags onto the counter and looking over at Vince. You know that he didn’t miss the comment either by the smirk on his face, the way he walks over and wraps his arms around your waist. “See, he’s already accepted it,” Vince whispers jokingly. 
“Shut up,” you giggle, rolling your eyes as you playfully push him away and turn around to begin putting groceries away. Vince continues to make subtle moves, sliding his hand along your lower back as he walks by to put a box of crackers into the cupboard, stepping up behind you to take the can of chickpeas that you were struggling to put onto the top shelf out of your hand and doing it for you. It takes you two forever to finally put everything away and once you do it’s time to start making dinner. “Are you going to help me or just be in my way?” You tease. 
“I know you like having me around.”
Shaking your head you look down at the recipe on your phone, unable to argue against that. You really didn’t want Vince to leave, even if he was really just getting in your way. Because you liked Vince, a lot more than you should.
A few days later you received a call from one of the businesses you applied to asking you to come in for an interview, to which you easily agreed. It was during another four day span of Vince and Sammy being gone so you were able to get ready and go for your interview without any questions. There was something about admitting to the fact that you were trying to find a job in St. Louis that scared you. Perhaps it was simply because it was a little crazy. You would need to find a job willing to arrange a visa for you, you would need to find your own apartment, and quite frankly, you probably just hadn’t thought it through enough. But you didn’t want to leave either, you were having a good time here with your brother and Vince, although you were trying to convince yourself that Vince had nothing to do with the decision. 
The interview went well and the next morning you got a call with a job offer. You accepted it quickly, not just because it meant you could stay in St. Louis but because it was also a job you were more than interested in.
Sammy and Vince get home later that afternoon and you pull Sammy into the living room. “I have some news.”
“Okay?” Sammy mutters, eyebrows furrowed, hands folded nervously over his knees as he sits on the edge of the couch. 
“I got a job.”
“Oh, congratulations,” Sammy says, the news processing in his head as you watch his body language sink a little. “Does this mean you’re going back home?”
Shaking your head you fidget with a piece of thread on your hoodie sleeve. You weren’t sure why you were nervous to tell him that you had found a job there. “It’s here.”
Sammy has his arms around you quickly, pulling you to your feet and into a tight hug. “You’re staying here?”
Laughing you pull back from him, staring up at him in shock. You hadn’t expected him to be that excited about it. “Yes…I mean, I’ll obviously get my own place and car and everything but I’m going to be in the city.”
“What’s going on?” Vince asks, walking into the living room. 
“I got a job here,” you tell him, voice quiet and apprehensive. You were a little worried that Vince wouldn’t be happy, that maybe he had only been into you because he figured you would be leaving, that it was a short term thing.
“Here? Like, you’re staying in St. Louis…for good?”
Nodding slowly you glance down at the ground, taking a deep breath. “Yeah.”
“Congratulations,” he tells you, walking over and pulling you into a hug.
“Thanks,” you mumble, pulling back to look up at Vince, trying to read his expression. Unfortunately you come up with nothing, sighing as you step away from him. 
It’s not till much later that night when you even get the chance to talk to him more, Sammy barely leaving your side as he excitedly looked through apartment listings with you, even though he assured you that there was no rush for you to move out. 
Once everyone had gone to bed you sneak out of your room and down the hallway to Vince’s bedroom, pushing it open slightly. “Vince?” You whisper, trying your hardest not to wake Sammy up in the process. 
“Hey, babe,” Vince says softly, making your heart flutter so easily. “Are you going to come in?”
Slipping through the door you shut it softly behind you, fumbling through the dark bedroom to Vince’s bed. “Hey,” you mumble, climbing onto the empty side of the bed and sitting with you legs crossed, watching Vince sit up and lean against the headboard. 
“What’s wrong?”
How he knew so quickly that you were worried about something was beyond your comprehension. Normally you weren’t easy to read but Vince saw right through it. “I just…if you thought this was something different because I was going to be leaving, I totally get that. We can go back to just being friends…or not, if you don’t want. We don’t have to tell Sammy, I can move into my own apartment and we can pretend this didn’t happen, it’s fine,” you ramble. 
“Y/N,” Vince says quietly, reaching over and placing his hands around your waist, guiding you closer as you slide onto your knees. “I like you…I have feelings for you. I don’t want to pretend this didn’t happen.”
“I just thought, I don’t know. Your reaction earlier wasn’t what I expected.”
Vince pulls you over his lap, hands running along your thighs. “Because you don’t want Sammy to know about us and I didn’t want him to be suspicious if I seemed too happy about it.”
“Oh,” you whisper, sliding your hands along his bare chest, resting them on his shoulders. 
Vince chuckles, pulling you closer and leaning up. “I didn’t want to be the one to suggest it, but I was hoping you would look for a job here,” Vince admits before pressing his lips to yours. And you kiss him back eagerly, arms around Vince’s shoulders. 
Grinding your hips down into Vince you feel him already getting hard. And you needed him, more than you had ever felt you needed someone in your life. 
“Our agreement,” Vince mutters against your lips. 
You can feel his breath on your lips, can feel how hard he was below you, can feel every little shift of his fingers along your skin. “Vince, please,” you whimper. 
“Fuck, you can’t say it like that and expect me not to cave,” Vince groans, hands on the hem of your t-shirt, yanking it up over your head swiftly. And it comes off easily, your lack of a bra leaving it easy for Vince to immediately bring his lips to your chest. 
Tipping your head back you close your eyes, every single kiss, flick of his tongue over your nipples sends waves of anticipation through your body. “Vince,” you moan, rocking your hips back and forth against him, desperate for some kind of contact. 
Reaching down Vince slides your pyjama shorts down your legs as you move from one leg to the other, helping him take them off. His hand slips between your bodies, fingers up along your folds towards your clit. He eases his way towards it, circling around your clit till your nails are digging into his back and your body is writhing in desperation. When he finally gets to your clit the wash of pleasure is enough to bring a quiet cry of relief from your lips. 
“Fuck, I love hearing you, but I need you to be quiet,” Vince mutters in your ear as he brushes gentle circles over your clit. “Can you do that for me, baby girl?”
All you can manage to do is nod and hum out a muffled “mhm.” 
“Good girl,” Vince mutters, replacing his fingers on your clit with his thumb, fingers travelling down towards your entrance, one finger sliding inside of you. You’re trying your hardest to stay quiet, head dropping down to Vince’s shoulder as you bite down on your bottom lip. “Fuck,” you whisper a few minutes later, a few muffled moans slipping from your lips as you reach your high. 
Coming down from it you stay on Vince’s lap, pulling your head away from his shoulder to look into Vince’s eyes. Remaining where you were you reach down, hand guiding Vince towards your entrance, a heavy breath leaving your lips as you sink down onto him. Vince groans, hands on your hips as he shifts further down the bed. It’s unbelievably quiet in the room as the two of you find a rhythm, both of you fighting with every ounce of your self-control to remain quiet. You stay on top of Vince the entire time, both of you too scared to be too loud to switch positions. But it doesn’t take you long to reach your second wave of pleasure, your body already sensitive from the first. And it’s only a couple seconds after that Vince reaches his, groaning quietly as his grip on your hips tightens. When you climb off of him and collapse on the bed beside him Vince hops up, grabbing a towel for you and returning quickly to start the cleanup process. 
After using the washroom you return to Vince’s bed, curling up at his side, head on his chest. “I shouldn’t sleep in here.”
Vince sighs, running his hand along your back. “We’re going to have to tell him.”
“Do we really, Romeo?” You joke, tugging the blankets up higher on your body despite the fact that you had just told Vince you weren’t spending the night. 
There’s a few minutes of silence, Vince’s hand pausing on your back as if all his energy was being funnelled to his brain. “What?”
“Romeo and Juliet,” you tell him. 
“You think I’m going to get your Shakespeare references?” 
“At least you knew it was Shakespeare.”
Vince chuckles and shakes his head, “I’m not that stupid.”
“Well…,” you giggle, tipping your head back to look at Vince. 
“Oh, really?” He laughs, grabbing your wrist and flipping you around onto your back. He hovers over top of you, pinning your wrists down. “That was kinda rude.”
“Too bad I’m actually into this,” you whisper, looking up at him through your eyelashes as you bite gently on your bottom lip. 
Vince groans quietly, rolling off of you and flopping back onto his back. “Why is everything you do so hot?”
“Kinda glad you think that way, seems like it gives me an upper hand.”
“Looking like that you definitely have the upper hand, for sure,” Vince chuckles, wrapping his arm around your waist as he pulls you into him. And the two of you continue talking, the whole time you were fully intending to make your way back to your own bed. 
But you don’t ever make it out of Vince’s room that night. 
“Get your lazy ass up.” You’re startled away by a voice yelling through Vince’s door, fist knocking a minute later. “We’re going to be late for practice again, enculé.”
“Oh, shit,” you mutter under your breath, grasping at the blankets on Vince’s bed yanking them up over your bare torso as you sit up. “Vince,” you whisper, shaking his somehow still sleeping form. 
“Hmm?” He hums, rolling over to face you. “What’s wrong?” 
But before you have the chance to say anything Vince’s door flies open and your eyes meet with Sammy’s. You watch him visibly try to process what was going on in front of him, eyes wide and fists clenched. 
“Sammy,” you begin, watching him step back, shaking his head in disbelief. “Sammy, wait, I…it’s not what it looks like.”
“Really?” Sammy counters, obviously knowing that it was exactly what it looked like. But he’s already on his way back out of the bedroom and you make a move to stand up but Vince grabs your arm before you have the chance. 
“Give him a second to process,” Vince suggests, glancing down at the way you were clutching his blankets to your naked body. “And maybe put some real clothes on.”
Nodding you crawl out of Vince’s bed, pulling on the pyjama’s you were wearing when you showed up in his room the night before. Vince gets up a minute later, pulling on a pair of jeans a hoodie, glancing at his phone. “We are going to be late,” he mutters, his back to you as he gathers his keys and wallet, jamming them into his pockets. 
“Vince, I’m scared.”
Vince turns around quickly, eyes on you. You had your arms wrapped tight around your body, eyes teary. “Hey,” Vince says gently, walking over and pulling you into a gentle hug, resting his chin on top of your head. “It’s okay, everything is going to be fine.”
“Did you see him? He looked so upset…he’s going to be mad, Vince. I can’t, I can’t handle him being mad at me.” 
You didn’t even realize you were crying till Vince pulls back, reaching up and wiping away the tears from your cheeks. “He won’t be mad at you, he’ll be mad at me. I’m the one who started this.”
You’re caught off guard by this, laughing softly. “That’s a lie.”
“It’s not.”
“I kissed you on the couch,” you remind him, your hands wrapped around his forearms as you stare up into his eyes. 
“I came home early and skipped going for drinks with the guys that night because Sammy told me he was going out for the night. I was hoping for what happened that night.”
You’re caught off guard by his confession, speechless and frozen in place. 
Glancing over you see Sammy step into the doorway, slowly pulling away from Vince “We have to go.” 
“Yeah,” Vince mutters, reaching over and grabbing your hand, squeezing it as he steps out of the bedroom with Sammy. 
You watch them walk away in silence, not leaving Vince’ bedroom till you hear the front door close. Slowly making your way out of the bedroom you try to busy yourself with tidying the apartment to keep yourself thinking too much about the situation. 
“Y/N,” Sammy’s voice calls later in the day, walking into the living room where you were sitting on your laptop, scrolling through apartment listings. 
“Hey,” you say quietly, looking up at him. Reaching forward you slowly close your laptop, setting it down on the coffee table in front of you. “How was practice?” 
“Fine,” he says, sitting down on the love seat beside the couch you were on. Sammy watches you glance in direction of the hallway. “He went to Jordan’s place.”
“Oh,” you whisper, feeling your heart sink a little. 
“It wasn’t his idea,” Sammy tells you, noticing how disappointed you seemed. “I wanted to talk to you alone.”
“Oh,” you repeat, not knowing what to say. Your brother had always known the details of your relationships, telling him all about your crushes, dates, when boyfriends would upset you. This had been the first time you kept something like that a secret from him, and now you were regretting it. Perhaps if you had told him earlier, when you first started to develop feelings for Vince things would have been different. But now it seemed like you two knew there was something wrong with what you were doing, needing to keep it a secret. 
The silence in the room is heavy, and it feels painful as you fidget in your seat. Sammy staring at you for a few minutes before finally saying anything. “Why?”
Staring down at the ground you try to come up with an answer to his question. “I like him,” you whisper, shrugging.
“Why him? Did you not even think about what’ll happen when things end between you two?”
“That’s really optimistic,” you mumble, eyes focused on your fingers as you pick a few pieces of lint off of your jeans. 
“Well what?” Sammy asks, voice raising in frustration. “You going to marry him?”
Finally looking up at Sammy you roll your eyes, sighing loudly. 
“God, now I see why mom got so mad every time you rolled your eyes,” Sammy mutters. “Why the hell are you even rolling your eyes?”
“Because I’m not even thinking about marriage…with Vince or anyone else. That’s crazy,” you reply, your voice getting louder and louder with each word. 
“So you’re going to break up with him, or he’s going to break up with you and then my friendship with him is going to be fucked,” Sammy snaps. “You really didn’t consider that? That you’re ruining my friendship with Vince…and for what?”
“Stop yelling at me,” you yell back, hoping up from the couch and staring down at him, tears welling up in your eyes. “I’m sorry, Sammy. I don’t know what to say, I like him.” Sniffling you reach up, wiping away tears from underneath your eyes. 
“I’m not okay with it.”
Wrapping your arms tight around your body you try to compose yourself, try to stop the tears from continuously flooding your eyes. You hated that you cried during conflict, hated that when it was conflict with Sammy that reaction was always heightened. “What do you want me to do then?”
Sammy glares up at you, shaking his head. “You already fucked it up, it’s too late for you to do anything.”
It feels like someone just punched you in the stomach, physical pain radiating through your body in response to his words. But you can’t think of a single defence for yourself. “Fuck you,” is all you manage to croak out before turning around and hurrying in the direction of the front door. 
“Where are you going?” Sammy calls, following after you. 
“I don’t know,” you tell him honestly, yanking on a jacket you had hanging up on a hook beside the door. “Does it really matter? I mean, I’m such a fuck up anyway.”
“I didn’t say that,” Sammy exclaims, watching you pull on a pair of shoes. “Can you just stop? We’re not kids anymore, you can’t just fucking run away.”
“No, we’re not,” you snap, standing up straight again. “So why are you treating me like one?”
“Because it’s my goddamn life you’re messing with.”
“You don’t have to be such an asshole,” you whisper, tears now streaming down your face with no chance of you being able to contain them. “I’m sorry I developed feelings for your friend, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about, I’m sorry I acted on it…I’m sorry I came here, I don’t know what you want me to say.” You’re reaching for the doorknob a moment later, yanking the door open. 
“Don’t say that, stop, Y/N, where the fuck are you even going to go?” Sammy asks, reaching for your arm which you pull away from him before he has the chance to grab you. “You can’t just wander around alone crying."
“Well it’s not like this apartment is feeling overly hospitable right now,” you tell him, wiping the tears off  your cheeks. “I never would have thought you would be such an asshole over me falling for a guy. I’m sorry he’s your friend, I wasn’t trying to make that happen. In fact, I was trying not to. But you don’t really care, do you? Because the situation isn’t perfect for you so why should you even try to accept it?”
With that you leave the apartment. You take an Uber to one of your new friend’s houses, thankful that she had replied before your Uber even got there that she was free and wanted to hang out. After a brief explanation of what was going on you settle down on her couch, her puppy curled up in your lap as you two talk, able to get your mind off of the situation with Sammy and Vince, even if only for a short period of time. 
You two order take out and lay on the couch, sending each other dumb tiktoks for the majority of the night. 
‘Are you okay?’ It’s a text from Vince and you switch from the tiktok app to your messages. 
‘Yeah, I’m fine. I’m at my friend’s place. You’re home now?’
“Vince texted, I think he just got home,” you tell your friend, sitting up on her couch with a sigh. 
“Did he say anything about the situation?” She asks, turning her head to look over at you. 
Shaking your head you look down at your screen, watching the three dots inside a text bubble, waiting to get the text he was typing. ‘Yes, when are you coming back?’
‘I don’t know. I guess soon, I just don’t know what to do.’ 
‘About what?’
‘Sammy’ ‘Us’ 
‘Can I come pick you up?’
And twenty minutes later you’re leaving your friend’s house, promising to keep her updated on the situation. 
“Hey,” you greet as you get into Vince’s car, glancing over at him while pulling on your seatbelt. 
“Hey.” Vince reaches over, placing his hand on your thigh, squeezing gently. “How did it go with Sammy?” 
“Not great,” you admit, placing your hand on top of Vince’s, sliding your fingers between his and folding your hand over his. “Did you guys talk?” 
“A bit.” Vince says, pulling out of the parking lot of the apartment. “What did he say to you?”
“That I’m messing up his life,” you mumble, your eyes filling with tears. “Basically I fucked up and whatever the fallout from this is it’s all my fault.” 
Vince’s hand clenches around the steering wheel as he drives with no particular destination in mind. Of course Sammy was one of his best friends and that wasn’t about to change over one fight. But friends didn’t always agree on everything, didn’t always get along. And by the way Vince’s jaw was clenched, eyes glaring through the windshield in front of him, it was clear that was the case. “That’s such bullshit. You know that’s not true...right?” 
“What if it’s not?” you croak. “Are we being selfish? Your friendship with Sammy, jeopardizing that when this ends?”
“It doesn’t have to end poorly and ruin anything,” Vince points out. “It doesn’t have to end,” he adds. 
“Vince,” you whisper, glancing down at your hands folded together. How perfect they fit, how comfortable you were with him. “That’s crazy to say right now.”
“I know,” he admits, squeezing your hand. “So it might not last forever, but no matter what happens we’ve already started...whatever this is, so why does it matter when it ends?”
You can’t really argue with that point. Your options are end it now or give it time, see how things play out. “But…Sammy,” you whisper. 
“Give him time.” 
The two of you drive around aimlessly for a little while longer till he pulls into the parking lot of the apartment building, glancing over at you. “You okay? 
Nodding you pull your hand from his, resting it on the console as you lean across it and Vince is quick to react, bringing his hand to the side of you face to cup your cheek. His lips are gentle but eager, moving with intent but not pushing too far. And for a moment it feels like everything else has faded away, worries and stress blurring till they’re no longer visible anymore. “How do we do this?” You whisper, pulling back from Vince. 
“Do what?” He asks, sitting back in his seat, body angled towards you. 
“Deal with being in there, together, with Sammy.”
Vince is quiet for a moment, tapping at his steering wheel. “We’ll just figure it out when we’re in there, see what he’s like.”
Nodding slowly you open the car door, slipping out and walking towards the apartment with Vince. With every step closer you feel a growing anxiety, each and every possibility running through your mind. Would Sammy still be mad? Would he try to pick up the argument right where it ended? Would it be worse if he just decided to ignore it? Would you all need to sit down and have a conversation like an awkward family meeting nobody wants to be a part of? 
When you step into the apartment after Vince you hear the sound of the TV from the living room. Slowly making your way into the living room you notice Sammy with an Xbox controller in his hand, eyes trained on the TV. “Hey,” you greet, sitting down on the couch and alternating between watching the game he was playing and glancing at Sammy. 
“Hey,” Sammy mutters, finishing up his game before tossing the controller down onto the coffee table and sitting up to turn and face you. “Did running away solve everything?”
Shaking your head you pull your legs up to your chest on the couch. “Should I have stayed here and let you yell at me about fucking up your life instead?”
“I didn’t say you were fucking up my life.”
“Maybe not in those exact words,” you retort. “But you may as well have.”
Sammy sighs and leans forward, his elbows on his knees, running his hands through his hair. “I’m sorry,” he grumbles, looking over at you. “I just…fuck, I hate it so much. Like why him?” His tone is different now, lighter, easier than the last conversation. 
“I mean…look at him,” you say, trying your best to to lighten the mood even more. 
Sammy chuckles under his breath, shaking his head. “I guess I really should have seen it sooner,” he comments, staring down at the ground. 
“What do you mean?” 
Sammy looks up from the ground, eyes meeting yours. “You’re exactly his type and he’s been spending way more time just hanging around here since you got here. I’m such an idiot for not thinking this would happen. I pretty much set it up.”
You wait a few seconds in silence, processing that information. You had really just assumed Vince spent that much time at his apartment normally. You figured they were on the road a lot, when they were back in St. Louis he would just want to relax at home playing video games and watching TV. You never would have thought that you played a role In keeping him there. And you definitely wouldn’t have assumed you were exactly his type either. “So you can’t really be mad then…you said it, you set it up.”
Sammy laughs, sitting up straighter and shaking his head. “I didn’t say that either…But I’m not mad, I don’t like it…maybe that’ll change, I don’t know. But I’m not mad at you. You know I can’t stay mad at you.”
You smile softly, standing up and walking over to the couch he was on, dropping down beside him and throwing your arms around him dramatically. “Good, because I can’t handle you being mad at me,” you tell him. Pulling back you let your arms drop from around him. “So, will you come look at apartments with me tomorrow so that Vince and I can-.”
“Stop,” Sammy interrupts, pushing you away playfully. “I don’t want to hear it, you’re so gross,” he says, both of you laughing as you lean back in response to Sammy pushing you. 
Out of the corner of your eye you see Vince walk into the room hesitantly and you give him a reassuring smile. “Sammy admitted he actually set us up.”
“I did not,” Sammy exclaims, laughing. “I said I pretty much did…not on purpose though.”
“Close enough…I’m going to make dinner. I don’t know how you two are going to survive when I get my own apartment,” you laugh, standing up and walking over towards Vince, grabbing his hand and pulling him with you towards the kitchen. 
“You can come over and cook us dinner,” Sammy calls as you leave the living room. 
Shaking your head you make it to the kitchen, only there for a second before Vince is pulling you into him, leaning down and kissing you gently. “I knew it would be okay,” Vince mumbles against your lips. 
Bringing one hand to the back of his neck you press your body closer to his, confident that Sammy would be avoiding the kitchen now that you and Vince were in there alone. “No you didn’t,” you giggle. “You just said that because I was panicking.”
“Kind of,” Vince admits. 
“Well I’m glad it worked out,” you whisper, sliding your hands to his shoulders. “Because if we never got around to you pinning me down like you did last night I’d be really disappointed,” you joke, looking up at Vince through your eyelashes with a mischievous smile. 
Vince groans, shaking his head. “So that’s all I am to you?” Vince asks, playing along. 
“Of course,” you joke. Pulling out of his grasp you begin to prepare dinner, but the absence of touch doesn’t last long, Vince stepping behind you and placing his hands on your hips. “Someone is a little needy.”
“I’m hurt after your last comment,” he laughs, wrapping his arms around your waist, watching you chop up some vegetables.
Pausing you turn your head to the side, looking up at Vince. “Fine, I like you for more than just sex,” you tell him.
“So when are you letting me take you on another date…a real one.”
“Anytime,” you tell him, glancing over at him as he stands beside you, leaning against the counter. You can’t help but get caught up in staring at him for a little too long. A few months ago you never would have imagined your trip to St. Louis would even last this long, let alone end with you moving there and falling for a boy. And of course you weren’t sure how it would end, but for the time being you were happy with the new adventure you were embarking on. 
566 notes · View notes
buckleyblueyes · 4 years ago
Note
Buddie + curls
this turned into a lot about Buck's hair...
Buck is the only member of his family with curly hair. His dad’s hair has never been long enough to curl. His mother’s hair is straight. And Maddie’s hair is wavy, especially when she cuts it shorter and it doesn’t weigh itself down, but it’s not truly curly, not in the way Buck’s is. For a while when he was eleven or twelve, he convinced himself that he must be adopted, until he saw pictures of his father’s mother and the head of wild curls on her head. He was honestly disappointed by this revelation.
As a teenager, he let his hair run wild, mainly because one of the few times he got his mother’s attention was when she was nagging him to “for the love of God, Evan, please cut that mop on your head” and because although his parents disapproved of his hairstyle most of the kids at school thought he looked pretty cool. One time he tried using a flat iron to straighten it and ended up burning off a chunk of his hair. Never again.
After the bad self-done bleach job in Peru, he cuts off all his hair in order to start fresh in Los Angeles. And for a while he kind of likes having his hair short. It makes him feel put together and maybe a little adult? Abby says she likes his hair, but she’s also never seen his curls. He doesn’t make a conscious decision to grow out his curls, it just happens between work and the pandemic and everything. Going to get his haircut just isn’t really a priority for him.
He doesn’t even really think about it, gelling his hair most days anyway, until he sees Christopher for the first time in months and he’s not wearing any product in his hair bc he’s just hanging out at Eddie’s, and Christopher is delighted that they have matching curls. Buck didn’t realize how much he missed the kid until Christopher was grinning up at him and telling him that they’re “hashtag twinning!” and asking to take a selfie for Buck’s instagram together and Eddie is mumbling about disconnecting their internet because where did Chris even learn about hashtags?
Any plans Buck has to cut his hair are cancelled after that. He keeps his hair curly and starts using less product, and he actually...really likes it. He starts to realize that having his hair cropped short wasn’t ever really him, it was someone he was pretending to be. There’s an added bonus that sometimes when he and Eddie are watching TV together, Eddie will just start playing with his hair? Buck doesn’t dare bring it up to Eddie, for fear that he’ll stop. So he just enjoys it.
Once they finally get together, Buck realizes that Eddie is just...very fond of his curls, of running his hands through them while they kiss, of gripping them…*cough*...., of playing with them while they watch TV. He thinks they’re both cute and hot. Buck would’ve kept his curls anyway, but it doesn’t hurt to know his boyfriend likes them, too.
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djholt · 2 years ago
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Family Reunion | Para
Featuring: Delilah, DJ, & Tucker Holt. Mentions of their parents (Jonathan & Scarlett Holt), and Tucker’s boyfriend (Cameron LaCava) Time Frame: Thanksgiving 2022 Location: New Orleans, LA // Los Angeles, CA // Boston, MA Triggers: Mentions of homophobia, biphobia, alcohol & death/loss Notes: The Holt siblings gather (over video call) for the holiday
DJ had been spending the past couple of days leading up to Thanksgiving catching up with friends and former colleagues while in LA. A former client of hers while at her old agency had invited her down for a ‘Friendsgiving’ and after some consideration, she’d accepted. While at the extravagant home and watching some of the other guests mill about, sipping beer and cocktails in small clusters, DJ had been half-heartedly watching a football game on the giant, 80″ flat screen TV. While she was happy to have been invited over and not spend Thanksgiving alone, she as a bit tired and contemplating a round of visits and ‘hellos’ before calling it an early evening and heading back to her hotel room to sleep. Or take advantage of the hotel’s heated pool for an hour.
It was at that very moment that DJ’s cellphone buzzed her hand. For a split second, she’d hoped that there hadn’t been any sort of work-related crisis happening. Thankfully, the alert was actually showing her sister’s name, photo, and a request for a video call.
Glancing around while thinking quickly, she excused herself from the party’s main indoor area and slipped into the nearest bathroom, locking the door behind her. As she lowered the toilet lid and sat down, she answered the phone in a somewhat hushed tone, finding that her sister, Delilah, already had their brother, Tucker on the video call from his respective location.
“Hey! Happy Thanksgiving, Dolly!” Delilah piped up.
“Yeah, Happy Turkey Day. I love the haircut,” Tucker added, lifting his martini glass in a toasting gesture.
“Back at you both, and thanks, Tuck,” DJ replied, gibing her siblings a friendly smile.
“How’s Boston, Tucker?” Delilah asked.
“Just peachy, sis. Very historical. Way too cold to ever live here. We just finished having dinner. Cam’s family is still a little bit stuffy for my taste. Like I was regretting not wearing some pearls, but they’re nice people.”
DJ and Delilah chuckled at Tucker’s joking over the pearls. And then DJ asked, “How’s the adoption going?”
Right away, Tucker’s eyes widened and his lips stretched into a huge smile. “Amazingly! We should have our baby girl after the new year. You’re going to be aunties soooon!”
At his singsong announcement, DJ raised a hand on camera and said, “Already there thanks to Delilah but I’m happy to be an auntie again.”
Tucker gave a harmless but dismissive flick of his wrist at his sister’s technicality and then said, “Anyway, we’re so ready for her. Cam and I have been watching a lot of kids shows to prepare and Dolly? Nesting is definitely a thing. We’re not allowed to tease Delilah anymore.”
DJ rolled her eyes, while Delilah said, “Don’t worry, the baby factory over here is closed permanently. Three is plenty of kids for me. What about you, Dolly?”
DJ’s brows shot up, “Uhh, my baby factory never opened, so...”
Delilah chuckled and said, “Okay but are you seeing anybody? Are you thinking about settling down sometime soon? Maybe starting a family?”
With a sigh and a quick pause to make sure she wasn’t being overheard, DJ lowered her voice and told them both, “You do know that those things are requirements in life, right? I don’t think anything serious is happening for me right now, and I really don’t know on the kids front. I don’t exactly work the kind of job that’s conducive for the whole conventional family life.”
“Really?” Tucker questioned, tipping the martini glass to his lips. “For some reason, I thought you might want a child or two someday. If you did, I’m sure you’d figure out a way to make it work. Have it all and whatnot.”
Shrugging her slender shoulders, DJ replied, “I’m really focused on my career. And I love what I do. I’ve worked hard and love that I’m also successful at it and that’s not something I want to compromise. Besides, isn’t it a little backwards for me to jump to any sort of family planning when I’m still single? I mean, wouldn’t the Old Man keel over or ask God to smite me if I attempted having a child out of wedlock?”
Tucker couldn’t suppress an amused snort while Delilah’s face became immediately void of any amusement. With a gentle reproach, the eldest of the Holt siblings said, “Dolly...”
“What? Come on, Delilah. When has he ever approved of anything about me--who I am, what I do, any of that? I’m sure he’d have a conniption if he saw how short my hair is. And what if I were to pursue a serious relationship with another woman? Do you think it’d matter to him whether or not I’d want to have children? My relationship and any children would be abominations to him. Delilah, I know you choose not to speak ill of the man, but you only have secondhand experience to what Tucker and I went through when it came to our sexualities and Dad’s behavior towards us. I’m not ashamed of who I am or who I might end up in a relationship with. And I’m not going to submit myself or anyone important to me to his judgments.”
Taking a deep breath, DJ reminded herself to keep her voice low but she continued on. “He claims to love me but he doesn’t show it. Blowing up my phone around the holidays or his birthday, leaving me voicemails where he’s making digs or attempted guilt trips if I don’t answer or call back right away? That’s not love. Standing firm over some biblically-charged misgivings on non-heterosexuality to fuel his phobias or beliefs that two of his kids are absolutely going to hell? That’s not love. He can make the claim that he loves us but he has a horrible way of actually showing it. The only reason I’ve catered to him on any level with returning or answering calls has been for Mama, for her memory. But after this year, I’m not doing it anymore. I’ll find a different way to honor her--a way that doesn’t include his type of conditional love.”
Delilah frowned but said nothing. Tucker proceeded to down the rest of his very full martini glass.
The silence stretched on into uncomfortable territory, so DJ said, “Listen, I have to get going. I was invited to this Friendsgiving shindig and so far I’ve either been a wallflower or hiding out in a guest bathroom talking to you two. I love you both, but let’s talk again sometime before the weekend’s up, okay?”
“Sure, sure,” Tucker replied, lifting his empty glass in mock toast to the screen.
“Yeah, that’d be nice. And Dolly, Tucker, listen. Y’all know I love you, right?” asked Delilah.
“‘Course we do,” Tucker said.
DJ’s expression softened a bit but she didn’t offer her siblings a smile as she said, “I know. I love y’all too. And as much fun as hiding out in a bathroom at someone else’s party sounds, I really should get going.”
Tucker chuckled and Delilah said, “Oh, right, right! Sorry! We’ll talk again soon. Both of you take care.”
“Always,” Tucker sassed.
“Give my hellos and such to Cam, Jackson and the kids.”
Tucker and Delilah spoke confrimations over one another before all three ended the video chat. DJ sighed, thinking about the turn the conversation had taken with her siblings, namely with Delilah. She knew that, despite her eldest sister loving and accepting her and Tucker for all of who they were, her sister was by far the least resistant of their bigoted father and always tried to mend the broken bridges between them. DJ gave up actively trying to get her sister to see sense and give up said crusade, but she also wasn’t going to listen to Delilah’s attempts at getting her to even pretend to be loving towards their father. She hadn’t seen him as an actual father for a very, very long time. Thanksgiving certainly wasn’t going to change that.
Having coached actors, musicians and at one point, a local politician through public relations and putting on a strong faces when they weren’t really in the mood or mindset to, she took her own advice, slapped on a convincing smile, and washed her hands before heading out of the bathroom the rejoin the Thanksgiving festivities--and try to put the bulk of the video call behind her.
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marlahey · 4 years ago
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under the same roof part one: a stickler for the rules
a harry styles rpf ratings/warnings: references to stalking behaviour by a peripheral character, too many longing looks in a space too small to contain them, she’s clueless sometimes but we love her notes: surprise surprise! it’s good to be back my friends. as far as OG openings go, part one of utsr probably underwent the least amount of rewrites. the most notable change is sylvia’s age: she’s four-ish, going on five. just makes our lives a little easier in terms of continuity and logic! (please visit the masterlist to find all our other writing because I forgot tumblr is a BITCH and hates external links now. ugh.)  utsr masterlist | part 2 (7.12.2020) 
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• tuesday, 1st february 7:48 pm • In spite of the biting chill outside, it’s about a million degrees in this lobby. You wonder if the heater is broken and if it’s always going to be like this here. The hair escaping your ponytail is pressed flat against the back of your neck, and you’re struggling to balance the crate between your chin and the massive box in your arms.
One of the corners is digging into your gut so you raise a knee to adjust it, but the box slips in your grip and you barely manage to hang on. There’s a faint meow from Chowder’s crate. The doors to the elevator whirr open with a ding and you shuffle inside. “Which floor is it again?” India grunts. The box that she’s carrying is lighter but larger—more cumbersome. It obscures half of her face and the way she’s leaning over can’t be any good for her back. “Eight,” you reply, strained. India stretches an arm out to the keypad, struggling to reach the right number. She misses. “Yeah,” you deadpan, “so press four twice.” The sound of a quiet, stifled chuckle turns your head to the back corner of the elevator. A young man leans against the hardwood of the elevator wall with his hands clasped in front of him. He is tall and lean; silver and gold rings adorn his fingers. His hair is wavy and cocoa brown, as though he used to have a businessman’s haircut but has let it grow out. He’s wearing grey tartan tweed pants and black ward lo Vans. Tattoos poke out of the sleeves of his sweater. It’s an arguably strange ensemble, but he pulls it off well. The man pushes his tortoiseshell glasses up his nose with a thumb, gaze trained on the floor. His lips are still pressed together against a smile that flirts with the corners of his mouth. Only then do you realize you’d been staring. You tear your eyes away as heat nips your cheeks and ears. In your tattered converse, mom jeans, and grubby moving flannel, you feel suddenly small. Chowder moews plaintively, like he needs to remind you of his current status in, on, and surrounded by boxes. “Is it just me,” India murmurs to you as the doors ding open on the second floor, “or did that take… is the lift broken?” “It’s the slowest bloody thing,” the man interjects, like it’s the bane of his existence. “You get used to it.” The elevator jolts to a stop on the fourth floor and the doors peel open in silence. Nobody moves. “Sorry, ” India murmurs. The man just shakes his head. The back of the door to the elevator is a mirror so you’re able to privately relish in the invisible threads of your curiosity that reach out to him. “S’ fine, ” he replies softly. By the time you’ve reached the sixth floor, you’re still peering at the man periodically from beneath your eyelashes. He looks up and holds your stare in the reflection of the doors moments before they part, and a ding sounds again through the small space. He smiles at you, poised, before pushing off the wall and stepping carefully between you and India to the hallway. The doors close once again and you are alone with your friend. She drops her box a few inches and bugs her eyes out at you from over the cardboard lid. “Dibs.” You step forward, laughing, and bump your box into hers. Finally, you reach level eight, pile the last two of your boxes by the front door, collapse on the mattress on your bedroom floor still covered in clear plastic packaging, and order pad thai. • friday, 30th march 7:23 am •
“Hold the elevator!” you call mid-jog, and immediately wince. You need to be better about calling it a lift. You make it through the doors of the lift before they close halfway, but not before noticing an arm outstretched to hold them open for you nonetheless. A cross tattoo and the bottom of an anchor poke out from the sleeve of his suit. It’s black velvet that has a navy lustor in the light. You’re in the same company now as virtually every other morning since you’d moved here—the man with the glasses who noticed you on that first day. You’re pretty sure his name is Harry, unless he’s pinning someone else’s name to his chest every day on a badge beneath red emboldened letters reading, The National Gallery, London. It’s surprising to see him as you get on, however, because he lives below you on the sixth floor. Perhaps he’d forgotten something today and needed to go back up… if this were the case, you’re glad to have caught him by chance. Every so often the cast of characters rotates. Sometimes a stout older man with an emerald green briefcase and a mustache rides down with you on weekdays. A slender woman who is almost always on her headset, hovering by the button pad occasionally makes an appearance. They both live above you. Most mornings, however, are like today. It’s just you and Harry together, without fail, if only for those few measured moments of quiet at sunrise. Perhaps you two are on the same tube schedule. For someone you see so often, you know remarkably little about Harry apart from the observable; he’s not one for small talk, has poor eyesight, and boasts impeccable taste in suits. It occurs to you that you still haven’t had a full conversation with him. You absently wonder if he’s single. You’ve even made progress from polite nods of acknowledgment to a consistent “Good morning,” from him and a nearly unflustered, “Morning,” from you (though realistically speaking, a smile before you’ve had your first cup of coffee is only manageable because India would disown you if she knew that you weren’t taking every opportunity to talk to this stupidly handsome stranger). “Thanks,” you murmur, stepping through the doors Harry’s held open for you. “Sure.” The ride down passes in silence. You can’t work up the nerve to speak until the doors part and Harry gestures for you to exit first, and by then it’s too late. You offer a faint parting smile. But, you reason, there’s always tomorrow. • sunday, 8th april 2:42 pm • The lift stops on the sixth floor in its descent as you look up from your phone. Harry’s voice is audible from the hall as the doors open and it startles you because he’s usually alone. You take a sip of your iced coffee as Harry steps inside, wearing a black knit sweater with pink and orange planets across the front, black jeans, worn leather boots, and wayfarers. In one of his hands, he carries an umbrella and rolled-up reusable grocery bag. In the other—most surprisingly—he holds the tiny hand of a little girl. She’s wearing frog rain boots, rainbow leggings, and a t-shirt that proclaims the future is female. Her dense curls are a shade darker than Harry’s, her eyes are closer to brown than hazel, and her skin is a warmer golden hue—but her smile presses a dimple into her cheek, identical to the one you’ve been staring at for months. He has a kid? Harry pulls her gently inside and she seems disappointed that the button for the ground floor is already lit. “This one pumpkin,” he whispers, pointing at the close doors symbol just beneath. She presses it with a firm clack and beams when the familiar mirrors slide across. “Daddy, can we please, please get bananas?” You almost choke on your cold brew. He has a kid. Is there a ring? Do you see a ring? You’d never noticed him in a wedding band before and he certainly isn’t wearing one now. “Shh, we won’t forget bananas… I wrote it down, remember?” With his free hand, Harry fishes out a folded piece of Hello Kitty paper from his back pocket and holds out her, more than happy to let his child snatch it from him. “Daddy, look at the pretty star!” You almost choke on your coffee again as Harry’s gaze follows his daughter’s waving hand, still gripping the pink, polka-dot paper with cat ears, all the way to the golden star dangling from your neck. “Yes, it’s very nice,” Harry nods down at her, agreeing in a voice that could only be used with a child. “Don’t point, angel… s’not very polite.” He smiles at you, almost apologetic, and gently wraps his hand around hers to lower her outstretched arm. “You have a million stars at home.” The lift stops on the ground floor. You gesture for Harry to exit first, a courtesy he always seems to extend to you, and you melt into a smile as he lifts one corner of his mouth in timid gratitude. He hesitates in the doorway on his way out. “Say goodbye, Sylvia,” he says. He has a dad voice. It makes your stomach flip. Sylvia flashes you those sparkling brown eyes once more and waves, suddenly shy. You wiggle your fingers and she buries her face into her father’s leg. “We’re workin’ on it,” Harry says, like it needs an explanation of some kind. He keeps his tender smile when he glances at you over his shoulder before he and Sylvia disappear out the lobby doors and into the rain, hand in hand. • thursday, 7th june 8:24 am • You’re pinning an earring in as you step into the lift. It stops on the sixth floor and then it’s silent as usual between you, Harry, and the mustached emerald briefcase man. You still haven’t had a complete conversation with either of them, but you hardly mind. It’s gratifying to have a few moments of peace before the triathlon that is your final exams, the gym, then straight into your evening shifts at work. Even though you’re looking forward to drinks tonight with India to celebrate the end of term, you’re weary and your body is stiff. Another sleepless night had come and gone and you’d struggled to cover the bags beneath your eyes with makeup this morning. You frown in your recollection of the nightmare, the same icy stare tormenting you. There is an older man with nearly translucent blue eyes, who you see so often around London that you’re beginning to wonder if he’s a figment of your imagination. Yesterday you’d caught a glimpse of him in the reflection of a shop window on your daily walk home from the tube station. He was staring straight at you, but when you’d spun around to look closer, he had vanished. It had unnerved you so much that you hurried straight home without stopping at the shops for kitty litter. London is a crammed metropolis; at this point it’s likely nothing, but that doesn’t stop you from losing sleep over it. “My daughter has that book,” the man with the emerald briefcase says, pulling you back to earth. You let go of your now fastened earring and hold up the book that was pinned under your arm so that the cover is on display. The Truth About Forever by Sarah Dessen. “This one?” The man hums, continuing, "I’m ashamed to say I don’t even know what it’s about.” “It’s sweet.” Harry’s eyes flash to the book and then your face as you speak. You flip it over and consider the blurb on the back. “A girl sort of accidentally starts working for this catering company one summer while she’s dealing with the loss of her dad.” The stout man brushes over his mustache with his thumb and index finger. “I never knew you were American!” “Oh, yeah,” you laugh softly through a shrug. Harry looks down to the floor and you catch the last second of his smile. “I am.” “What brings you to London then?” asks the older man. “I’m a student at UCL.” “Impressive. What do you study?” “I’m a third year in Law... um, I have a minor in Art History, though.” You peer over at Harry through the reflection of the doors, but he simply pushes his glasses up his nose. You’re startled by the lift’s ding at the ground floor. “Cheers.” The old man nods at you before exiting. “Cheers,” Harry adds like a reflex, stealing a side glance at you before brushing past into the lobby. You could have sworn you’d seen the dimple forming on his cheek to mask a smile. • thursday, 27th september 8:51 pm • You knead the back of your neck with your fingertips and frown toward the ground as you wait for the lift. You don’t usually get home this late but your research advisor needed you to come in a little earlier to your shift this afternoon, and you hadn’t been able to get in a workout until an hour ago. What’s more, readjusting to London’s time zone after spending the month of August back home is taking a toll on your sleep. You sigh and try to relax your shoulders. The first term in your final year at university seems determined to bury you early. You press the auto-lock button on the set of car keys India had loaned you, then once more for good measure. You managed to finagle a guest spot in the garage beneath the building, though it’s your first time using it. It’s eerie and poorly lit down here; you tread lightly into the lift. You’d seen him again today—the blue-eyed man—and by this point it had just been… too often. You had convinced India to let you borrow her car to pick up some archives for your advisor in Ilford forty-five minutes out of your way. It was the first time you’d been to that part of London, and you were still getting used to driving on the other side of the road, so you were already on edge. You remember crossing the street over to a small brook beside the road and when you glanced over your shoulder, he was there in your wake, watching you. It was the middle of the day but you were alone, so you faked a phone call and took an indirect route to the Ilford Historical Society. It was enough to solidify your suspicions that something more serious is happening. On the drive home, you had mentally worked out a time in your schedule to visit the police department and file a report. The lift stops in the lobby on your way up, and your worries from the day promptly evaporate. You smile at your feet as Harry creeps inside the tiny corridor with a very measured, and even gate. Sylvia is passed out, her arms draped loosely around his neck. He’s in a charcoal grey tuxedo tonight and his usual glasses are switched out for contacts. You reach out to press the sixth-floor button, and Harry thanks you with the beginning of a smile. The two of you are stood at the back of the lift together, shoulder to shoulder facing the mirror, so it’s easy to indulge in your gaze toward the small child in his arms. You don’t try to hide the fact that you’re staring the way you might have a few months ago. Even in sleep, Sylvia’s tiny hand clings to the fabric of Harry’s collar. She nuzzles into his neck when the lift jolts upward. Her cheeks are rosy, and she wears a pyjama set covered in primary-colored dinosaurs. Her dark bob of curls—which have grown longer since you’d seen them last—are spread out across his shoulder, and her bloated toddler belly rises and falls against his chest. You smile absently at the short trail of memories you have of Sylvia, but your reverie is interrupted when you notice that Harry is looking directly into your eyes. It makes you do a double take. Could you have imagined it? Is that a blush? Had you embarrassed him? You’re still staring at each other in the reflection when the lift reaches the sixth floor. Your eyes dart to the floor, and you only allow yourself to look up once Harry is stepping out into the hall, well in front of you. He pauses in the doorway to turn around. “Goodnight,” he whispers. “Night.” You hesitate before adding, “Goodnight, Sylvia.” Harry’s smile only grows wider, as though the two of you had shared some fond inside joke. Something catches your eye when you arrive at your floor. You crouch down and pick up a plush kangaroo toy in the corner, flipping it over in your hands. It’s ratty, and has been washed so many times that the pink cotton on its ears is beading. One of the miniature black buttons for its eyes dangles loose, and the synthetic fur is matted. What was once chestnut has faded into a dull, tawny copper. “S.S.,” you read curiously. The initials are stitched in red to the bottom of the kangaroo’s long feet. The sound of the doors closing catches you off guard. You jump to your feet, tucking the small stuffed animal into your purse as you hurry down the hall and fish around in your bag for your keys. • saturday, 6th october 2:31 pm • You step into the lift, fasten in your earbuds, and tap the button on the keypad for the eighth floor. Today marks your third trip to the Ilford Historical Society this week. Soon you’re going to need to ask your advisor for reimbursement to fill India’s tank, but on the bright side you hadn’t seen the man with blue eyes since the first time you’d made the trip…You just hope that this means he’s retreating and not that he’s getting stealthier. You gnaw on the inside of your cheek and increase the volume of your classical playlist by a few notches. A flash of purple, white, and green bolts into the lift as the doors part at the lobby. Sylvia is in a Buzz Lightyear costume today. Harry’s tattooed arm swings through the half-open doors immediately behind her, going for the jet pack wings, but she squeals and escapes his hold. You watch the scene play out like a Tom and Jerry skit with La Traviata in the background as Sylvia darts around the corners of the lift and her father fails to corral her. Harry lunges for her, misses, lunges, misses again, then catches her by the elbow as she screams in laughter, squirming out of his grip. You silently pause your music and press the button for the sixth floor as Harry spreads his feet apart, catching Sylvia in his arms like a goalie as she tries to bowl through the closing doors. It’s fortunate that nobody else is trying to get in. She kicks her legs before adopting that pose children do when they don’t want to be held, and makes a rigid plank with her body. Hair disheveled and glasses sliding down his nose, Harry lurches for the keypad with his daughter wedged under his arm a few seconds after the doors close. “Oh.” He stops in his tracks once he sees the button for his floor is already illuminated. “Thanks.” You flash a quick smile. Harry sets Sylvia down breathlessly and she finds a hiding place behind him, her little arms wrapped around one of his knees. He leans against the back wall of the lift, the smallest backpack you’ve ever seen swinging from one hand with the initials, S.S. reappearing stitched onto one of the straps. You swallow and tug your earbuds out by their chord before slowly crouching down to eye-level with Sylvia. For a moment you look up at Harry because you feel the instinct to ask for permission for some reason, certain your expression is more serious than necessary. He’s frowning but he’s also smiling at you as though to gauge your next move—so are you, to some degree. You shift your eyes back to Sylvia, and reach cautiously into your purse. Sylvia’s eyes widen at the sight of the small kangaroo you retrieve from your bag, her mouth gaping in a tiny, square-toothed grin. It might just as well be Harry beaming at you himself with such a striking resemblance. Both of the kangaroo’s black button eyes are fastened tightly in place now. You make your voice light and ask, “Is this yours?” The sound of a zipper comes from above your head; you glance up to catch Harry pulling another kangaroo out of the backpack. How many kangaroos does she have? He passes the stuffed animal to Sylvia and you see now that it’s quite a bit larger than the one you’d found last week. It’s also different from yours because it has a long white stripe along its front with a wide, empty pouch halfway down its belly. Oh… perhaps it’s just the two. She cautiously approaches you with the larger toy in tow, until you’re close enough to snuggle the joey back into its mother’s pouch. She stumbles backward into Harry’s legs. You sigh in relief before rising to your feet. “Sylvia, can you say thank you?” Harry folds his arms behind his back and leans over to whisper against the top of his daughter’s head, but loud enough for you to hear. Her curls bounce as she bobbles her head in a bashful nod, wrapping an arm around dad’s leg again. “Thank you.” This child, you have to admit, is devastatingly cute. “We tore the flat apart looking for him this weekend,” Harry intones, shaking his head. “Where did you find him?” “In here,” you reply. He makes a noise, like the possibility had only just occurred to him. “Thank you.” “It was the least I could do.” You lean back against the wall opposite them as the lift reaches the sixth floor with a ding and you wave to the two of them on their way out. “Cheers.” Harry nods to you. “Say goodbye, Sylvia.” She gives you a small wave. Harry gently nudges her forward into the hallway with his foot. There is an interim of about ten seconds of quiet before Sylvia is hurtling back into the lift, making a beeline to you, and wrapping her arms around your legs. She beams up at you for the second time with a smile cut-and-pasted from her father. Bubbling laughter overcomes her, and you uncross your legs, unable to help yourself from joining in her smile. “Hello again!” you say, before it occurs to you that you probably shouldn’t be encouraging this behavior. “Vi,” Harry calls from outside the lift. She just giggles and buries her face into your knee. He appears in the quickly closing doorway, one hand keeping it open as he narrows his eyes. There’s something playful in it though, a practiced pretend serious. Your gazes catch and Harry winks, putting a finger to his lips. “Uh oh,” he says, “I think I hear a tickle monster!” Sylvia shrieks, but she’s not faster than her father, who’s crouched low to catch her by the sides, merciless fingers at work until the child instinctively releases you. She laughs and laughs and laughs as he scoops her up into his arms. “So sorry.” Harry’s apology is much less flustered than you would have expected. Sylvia wiggles in his grip, cracking up, euphorically naughty. You simply let out a breathy laugh as they finally both make it out of the lift together. Down the hall, you hear Sylvia’s giggle melt into a screech against gravity; you lean over to catch a glimpse of Harry flipping her upside down on his chest with her belly out, legs flailing back and forward over his shoulder. “Oh, you’re bad. You’re bad.” He does not show his daughter the mercy of waiting until they’re in the privacy of their apartment before the second round of tickling begins. “You’re gonna get Daddy in trouble.” • monday, 8th october 8:23 am • Riding in the lift alone is nice because you don’t have a full-length mirror in your apartment. You brush the cat hair off of the front of your sweater and fix one of the sleeves that had bunched up beneath all your layers. The yarn is a warm, autumnal bay that compliments your thick scarf and the gold buttons of your roomy black overcoat. You hear a ding and your eyes flash up to the floor indicator above the entrance. You almost lose your balance jumping back from your reflection when you see the illuminated number six. The doors separate and Harry steps in beside you, closer than usual. Today he’s in a forest green, double-breasted jumpsuit with faint pinstripes, and you can’t help but find it fitting that he works in an art museum. “Morning,” he murmurs. “Good morning.” You feel something tense pinned to the air between you two. “Did you fix Jojo’s eyes?” Harry asks after a beat, almost accusatory. Your eyes narrow at his reflection in the doors. It takes you a minute to summon to mind what he’s referring to. “Jojo?” He flushes a little, just enough to warm the tips of his ears. “The um—” Harry clears his throat, shaking his head. “He’s… the baby kangaroo.” If you didn’t know better, you’d think he was embarrassed. But as you’ve come to learn, Harry just loves his daughter immensely. “It was nothing,” you reply evenly. Harry lets out a light, almost defensive scoff. “You didn’t have to do that, you know.” “I know.” Part of you wonders if he’s the type to make a fuss over what you’d consider an innocuous gesture. You could see how an unsolicited favor from a stranger might come off as undermining to a young, single parent, come to think of it. The thought that you’d been the cause of Harry’s ire—or even his mild annoyance—makes your chest feel tight. The lift stops on the second floor. A group of three enters in staccato laughter, pulling your attention forward. Harry’s eyes meet yours in the reflection of the doors—just two seconds that maybe you could pretend were an accident—before you both glance away as though you’d been caught. The group leaves ahead of you into the lobby. “I just wanted to do a nice thing, you know. For her.” You’d been staring resolutely ahead in your admission, but dare yourself to glance sideways and look directly at Harry. “And for you, honestly.” You brush past Harry into the lobby without waiting for his usual beckoning you to go ahead, but sense him turn toward you at the last second. You do not look back. • wednesday, 7th november 8:23 am • “Ouch, shit―” You jerk your hand from your pocket, staring in disbelief at the tiny pinprick of blood welled on the tip of your pinky. Returning your hand carefully into your coat, you pull out the red paper flower just as the lift doors ding on the sixth floor and Harry walks in. Sucking on your finger is helping your wound, but consequently draws his smiling, vaguely concerned eyes. “Alright?” he asks. You nod with a little hapless shrug, holding up the offending fake petals with a black button center and protruding silver pin out the back. “Forgot I had this.” It’s only a slightly embarrassing admission. Commonwealth countries mark the day of the Armistice, November eleventh, in a particular, unfamiliar way; India had explained the Poppy Appeal briefly to you last week when the pins had begun to appear all over the city, and you finally had a spare pound coin for the volunteer offering you one yesterday after class. You have a scant three seconds to look at the poppy pinned smartly to the left lapel of Harry’s trench coat before he turns to face forward, but in looking down at the one in your hand, you realize you have no idea how he’s done it. Surely it can’t be that difficult? You frown down at your own jacket. A tentative stab of the pin into the fabric is met with an audible chuckle from the other side of the lift. You flush; Harry’s smiling gently with one corner of his mouth. You try a second time, going at it from a different angle. “You have no idea what you’re doing, do you?” You haven’t had enough coffee yet to justify how warm you’re getting. You shake your head, accepting defeat. “Best let me help you before you hurt yourself again.” Despite his offer, he makes no move to take the poppy until you sheepishly hold it out to him. Neither the mustached, emerald briefcase man nor the headset lady have appeared today, but the space of the lift seems remarkably smaller when Harry gently takes the flower and shuffles forward to get a grip on your coat. An impressive array of rings on each of his hands catches the light. You have no idea what to do besides stand ramrod straight. “Trick is to put the pin through twice so you’re not poking yourself on it all the time,” he explains, his eyebrows pulling together in focus. You watch his chest move as he breathes; the scent of Harry’s cologne wraps around you like an invisible shroud. It occurs to you that this is the longest interaction you’ve had since he noticed your careful restoration of Sylvia’s tiny treasured kangaroo. You wonder how long she’s had the pair of them. You also wonder if Jojo’s eye had been falling loose for a reason―if perhaps Sylvia preferred him a little rough around the edges, and it leads you again down a strange rabbit hole of is Harry upset that you did that? “I hope it’s okay that I fixed Jojo’s eye,” you venture. Harry pauses a moment, then laughs once, which draws you inadvertently closer together. “You’re funny. Which you shouldn’t be when I’m holding something sharp.” You almost stop breathing altogether. “Course it’s okay,” Harry continues without looking up. His nose is now scrunched as he pinches the tough wool. “She loves that thing, and I’m shit with sewing.” His eyes finally flick up to yours, a self-deprecating tilt to his mouth, and you smile tentatively. “Glad I could help.” With that, you’re quiet until he’s done and his concentrated frown relaxes into satisfaction. You watch Harry consider his handiwork, tracing the side of a petal with one of his fingers. “That should do it,” he says, stepping back. Your eyes meet again. You’ve reached the ground floor, but the doors simply sit open. “Looks nice.” He’s talking about the poppy. Your cheeks warm anyway. “Thank you.” Harry smiles slowly, as though he’s trying to pace the expression. “That’s alright.” He turns and ushers you out of the lift. “Have a good day.” “Same to you.” The edges of your poppy flutter as you turn the corner out of the lobby. Don’t turn around. Don’t ruin the moment. Who are you kidding? A quick glance over your shoulder reveals Harry loitering outside the lift, watching you. He starts a little, lifting a hand like he’s going to wave and dragging it over his hair instead. Harry turns abruptly. You almost feel bad for catching him out. You’re too busy walking faster and failing to smother a stupid grin all the way to campus. • thursday, 20th december. 4:11 pm • You’re thankful that everyone else in the parking garage has ruddy cheeks and runny noses from the storm—nobody would be able to tell by looking at you that you’d been crying all afternoon. Just when you thought you’d never see those blue eyes ever again, you’d felt a hand brush against yours on the crowded tube just hours ago. You turned to see whose pinky was resting atop your knuckles as he clutched onto the pole directly above your hand. The fear was immediate and visceral; every follicle of hair above your shoulders prickled, your lips went cold, and you couldn’t get yourself to start breathing again before stumbling back into the chest of some other unsuspecting passenger. How long had he been standing there? You bolted out of the doors the first chance you got, a good seven stops from home. You didn’t think you were followed but of course you couldn’t be sure, so you ducked into a coffee shop instead of jumping straight onto the next train. You used up all your data to call your parents, hardly able to hold your cell phone steady with the sheen of sweat on your palms. The police had no record of such a man you described. He was middle-aged, taller than you could have imagined so close up, and had a deformity or some sort of scarring on his upper lip. You would have recognized him if you stumbled across his photograph, but you’d gone through every headshot on the books within a ten-kilometer radius of London at the police station. You’d lost sleep combing through the online database of sex offenders in your area without any luck. And since you didn’t have a name or a concrete instance of harassment, they could only add the encounter to the file you’d started in October. Once you’d managed to get a hold of India, she immediately came to rescue you from the coffee shop and dropped you off at home. You insisted she pull into the gated underground garage rather than letting you off by the front doors. With a hand on your shoulder, she offered to stay the night. You had declined. There were some days when you swore you were going crazy, but all it took was one last look into his eyes on the tube today for you to know in your gut that he was real, he was watching you, and you were right to be afraid. You hadn’t heard the ding of the lift but you notice when the people around you begin to huddle on. It’s a tight squeeze inside. You sigh when you see that nearly every floor up to ten is illuminated on the keypad. You sneak into a corner by the doors and try to distract yourself by focusing on the overwhelming smell of rain carried into the lift on everyone’s rubber boots. A faint buzzing noise thrums overhead, and the light seems dimmer than usual—one of the bulbs in here must need replacing. The lift comes to a stop at the lobby. Your eyes are on the carpet, but you recognize a familiar pair of black leather boots ambling through the doors. You look up to catch Harry shaking the rain out of his curls with one hand. He licks his lips and scans the lift briefly, only moving from the entrance once he sees you by the keypad. His eyes change, the corner of his lips quirking up. Harry parts a few people to stand in front of you, chest to chest, carrying a box of Legos almost as tall as you, covered in fire trucks and construction vehicles. They’re the bigger, softer type of plastic blocks that come in lighter shades made for toddlers. You didn’t even know they made sets with so many pieces. It doesn’t seem necessary. The thing could be a column. Harry rests the box on the floor against his hip and even more people pack inside behind him, so many that you have to give up your corner spot which was already tight, and sandwich yourself in between Harry and the wall. And why is the person standing directly behind Harry trying to leave a voicemail? The two of you share a small laugh, looking down at your feet and shifting to get comfortable as the lift vibrates into motion against your back. Ding. Level two. Someone to the rear of the lift needs to get to the entrance. In order to let them through, Harry actually has to press up against you and prop his hand on the wall behind your head to avoid crushing you completely. “Sorry,” he says, strained. “It’s fine.” Ding. Level three. The last thing you need is for your heart to race like this after the mess of a day you’ve endured. To make matters worse (or better), Harry is close enough for you to feel the heat radiating off his body. You’re struck by the most staggering urge to just… lean forward a few inches. It would be so nice to bury your face in his sweatshirt, to be engulfed in the embrace of his arms, and to let yourself cry about your afternoon until you feel empty and full at the same time. Ding. Level four. You choose a button on his open black overcoat to stare at, flustered and humiliated by your own sensitivity. If it were any other afternoon you’d be having a field day with this but you’re too much of a coward to look anywhere near his face in your state. A single drop of rain falls from the end of Harry’s chin and lands on your collar. Ding. Level five. Your eyes are dry and puffy, your breathing is still ragged, and you seriously consider holding your breath altogether until you reach the sixth floor. You’d known since the coffee shop that you were going to cry the moment you stepped foot into your apartment tonight, but you hadn’t considered the possibility that it might happen sooner than that. You shake your head. Ridiculous. You look up idly to find that Harry is watching you. His expression seems serious now, oddly focused. You tilt your chin up incrementally. Harry licks his lips. Is anyone looking? How is nobody looking? You take a small breath and Harry’s gaze flashes again to your lips. Your palm brushes the back of his hand, hidden by the toy box, and he tilts his wrist toward you, spreading his fingers just enough to fit the tips of yours between his knuckles. His hand is cool from the rain and yours is warm from the car. How is someone still leaving the same voicemail? There’s space enough now in the lift for him to give you a few inches of distance so why is Harry drawing closer to you? Why is he leaning in? Ding. “It’s you,” you blurt, and swallow before adding more quietly, “This is your floor.” A few people stuff their cellphones back into their pockets, making their way into the hall. Harry clears his throat and leans over to lift the toy box. Your hands fall apart but he reaches out to gently brush the side of your arm in goodbye—unable, it seems, to meet your eyes. You watch him as he turns on his heel to shuffle out behind someone else, carding a hand through his hair. You close your eyes and exhale without a sound. You only open them in time to catch him glancing over his shoulder at you before rounding the corner. Neither of you had smiled. When the lift reaches the eighth floor, you almost forget to step off. You lean on the back of your door and sigh once you’re in your apartment, dropping your keys to the hardwood with a clatter. Alone in the dark, after one of the single most distressing days of your life, you press two clammy palms to your face and laugh—giddy—like a fool. • tuesday, 1st january 2:33 am • You swing your leg inelegantly out of the cab. Your foot slips on the road’s thin polish of ice. The ankle strap of your stiletto comes undone at the clasp as you only just remember that you began taking them off in the back seat. You laugh at yourself, nearly dropping your half-empty bottle of Prosecco, hobbling to the sidewalk through the rain with one shoe in hand. “Thanks—thank you, goodnight!” You wave your shoe in the air as the cab speeds away after having left a fifty-percent tip—it’s half past two on New Year’s Eve for Christ sake—and turn toward your building. Have the doors to the lobby always been this heavy? Perhaps it isn’t the best idea to try and hop back into your shoe while shouldering through the doorway, because you bang your head against one of the large, protruding handles with a metallic thud. “Fuck.” It hurts a little but the jello shots and bottle of Sangiovese you’d guzzled with India earlier are helping. You squint up because the lobby is spinning, and spy the outline of a man facing away from you with his hands in his pockets. He looks over his shoulder as he waits for the lift, lackadaisical. It’s a familiar profile. The half of his face visible to you is in shadow apart from the crescent moon-shaped hollow of his dimple sinking in as he smiles. “Hi,” Harry drawls with a chuckle. You step into your shoe without bothering to fix the ankle strap and wobble over to the lift. All night you had glided so effortlessly in your four additional inches. Now, you feel as though you’re walking a tightrope in flippers. “Hello.” You enunciate too much in your efforts to sound sober. You and Harry look at each other and smile until you laugh, at absolutely nothing at all. There’s no sign of his specs tonight; his hair is sopping, and the shoulders of his burgundy suit are damp. Harry gives you a once over. “You alright?” He’s slurring a little. You bob your head in a nod. “M’good.” The lift dings and you both lurch forward to step between the doors before Harry stumbles backward and gestures for you to go first. You almost fall forward again in your shoes and have to grip the wall on the way in to steady yourself. These need to come off. Harry moves to his usual corner, leaning against the back wall with a hand on either railing and you do the same in the next corner over. You shimmy off your heels to hold them in one hand while balancing your half empty bottle of Prosecco against your hip with the other. The carpet is coarse beneath your bare feet. You take a gulp of wine and the curled silver ribbon around its neck tickles your chin. You and Harry glance sideways at each other at the exact same moment, both of your heads leaning against the back wall of the lift. You have to lean forward and cover your mouth with the hand holding your shoes so you don’t spit out your drink in laughter. It’s not even funny, really. How many times had you both accidentally caught the other staring over the past year in this very room Harry’s chuckle builds into a laugh and the echo of it reminds you of Sylvia the day she’d clung to your legs. You’ve noticed that Harry’s eyes crinkle like hers, too, if he finds something especially funny. The laughter melts and you stretch the arm holding the bottle out to Harry. He looks down at it, then back up at you before taking it gently from your grasp and helping himself to a swig. “You know wha’s not fair? I’ve—” he hiccups. “I’ve got to wear a badge t’work. With my name on it. And I see you everyday—” “Almost,” you correct automatically. “Almost everyday… so you probably know my name.” Harry’s eyes narrow. “Do you know my name?” You nod, a bit delayed. He passes the bottle back to you and you admire the intricate embroidery on the cuffs of his sleeves. “I’ve got a pretty good guess.” “What’s your name?” Harry asks after a beat, rolling his back off the wall to lean on his shoulder and face you. “Charles doesn’t know either.” You tilt your head, frowning a little. “Who’s that?” Harry rests his pointer finger on top of his upper lip. You grin slowly before answering his question. Harry echoes you with an equally slow smile, his voice italicizing the sound of your name. It sounds like he’s saying someone else’s name—a person you’ve never even met. He says it again, like he needs to introduce himself to each letter. Your heart is about the only part of your body able to move quickly. Harry smiles widely. It’s as though every other one he’s given you before had just been practicing for this moment. “Nice to meet you.” You wedge your shoes and Prosecco beneath one arm, taking a step forward with your free hand outstretched. Harry shuffles to meet you halfway in a handshake and the height difference between you feels staggering barefoot. You remember the feeling of his hand in yours when it was hidden by the Lego box. It would be so easy to just shift a little and clasp them together the way you had before. You can smell the memory of whiskey on his breath and see the flush of his cheeks close up. “You look like a disco ball.” You laugh and he releases you, like the sound had awoken his sense of propriety. His eyes take you in again, almost reflecting the shimmer of sequins scattered across the fabric of your dress before he looks back up at you. “Yeah,” you agree, tugging the hem an inch down your bare legs. “My best friend dragged me to some formal thing the other American students were trying to throw together. Really random.” Harry nods so you go on after a pause. “You’re handcuffed to someone and have to finish a bottle of wine, but India and I didn’t coordinate beforehand so we both brought one.” “Seems like fun.” “It certainly was.” You raise the Prosecco and it sloshes up against the neck of the bottle in tiny waves. “And you,” you raise your eyebrows, “look like a Turkish rug.” Harry grins, inclining his head as if that were the highest compliment. “Where’s Sylvia tonight?” His face is full of mock surprise. Harry pats the breast pocket of his jacket before running his hands over the front and back of his trousers. He looks over his shoulders, comically frantic, scanning each corner of the lift until you begin to laugh. Harry smiles wider, a little too pleased with himself. “She’s with her mum and her mum’s fiancé this week—so I guess her, um… soon-to-be other mum… They were having a little gathering at their new place tonight and we did the countdown a few hours early for her.” “How sweet.” Without a second thought, you inch closer and begin reaching for a stray piece of confetti in his hair. You can tell you’re drunk because you indulge a little in combing your fingertips through one of Harry’s curls, though it’s probably subtle enough for him not to notice. He goes very still. “Did—did you press the thing?” Harry stammers, his attention jerking to the keypad. “I didn’ press the thing.” “Oops,” you laugh, and catch a glimpse of yourself in the reflection of the doors as you turn to watch Harry hit the sixth and eighth floor buttons. Though the rain has offset India’s efforts to tame your hair, what surprises you more is the bright-eyed expression on your face. It’s out of character for you to feel this exhilarated over a simple drunken conversation. But something delightedly nervous hums beneath your skin all the same. “Why are you so wet?” you ask as Harry returns from the keypad. A tad closer, you note, than where he’d been standing before. You lean on your shoulder to face him and he slouches a little to meet your height. “Walked home,” Harry replies. Your jaw drops. “In the pouring rain?” “S’like ten minutes—really not bad.” Harry shrugs. “I didn’t mean to get so pissed tonight. My New Year’s resolution was to go a little easy on the booze.” He shakes his head in a chuckle. “I can’t really handle what I used to since the little one came along. M’not much of a drinker anymore.” The lift jumps as you reach the sixth floor and your arm flies out to balance yourself in the same moment that Harry offers both hands to catch you. You clutch his forearm and then immediately let go. “Sorry,” you murmur, taking one last look at him. “Well, goodnight Harry. Happy New Year’s.” The look he is giving you is peculiar—on the verge of resignation, but not quite letting go of all hope. As though the last sober part of him is leaning forward on its elbows, asking if you agree without telling you first what it wants. Harry cranes his neck around to look down the stretch of hallway, his head falling back against the wall with a gentle thump. “You know, New Year’s isn’t really over until you finish all the champagne,” he declares, and you laugh a little in surprise. “Prosecco.” He waves away the correction. “Fine, all the Prosecco.” “New Year’s isn’t over until you get every last piece of confetti out of your hair,” you challenge. Harry raises his eyebrows, looking back to you. If he doesn’t get off soon, the doors are going to close. “New Year’s isn’t over until your shoes come off in the lift,” he shoots back. You burst out in a laugh. “New Year’s isn’t over until you’ve broken your resolution two hours into January.” Harry rolls his eyes. He smirks a little and it’s annoyingly charming in the dim, golden glow of the lift’s broken light. He’s stalling. All at once, you’re acutely aware of the lingering smell of rain and the faint hum of the light fixture overhead. You swear you can hear the echo of that never-ending voicemail from the day you’d slotted your fingers into his like it was a secret, just an arm’s length away from where the two of you stand now. He had tried to kiss you once before and you had stopped him. But now, in this moment, with your heart in your throat, you desperately want him to try again. Harry starts to speak and you don’t wait for him to finish. “Well, New Year’s isn’t over—” “—until you kiss someone at midnight.” You’re hyper aware of your own breathing in the daunting silence that follows. The lift doors seal closed. Harry is close enough for you to see the flecks of hazel in his eyes like sea glass. He floats his hand up as though he’s going to cup your jaw, but traces the tip of his middle finger in a line up your cheek to push back your hair so lightly it tickles. His jaw flexes and just when you swear he isn’t going to, Harry leans in. It’s gradual, as though he’s waiting for you to change your mind, but your heads are tilting and then the tips of your noses brush. If you turn, even minutely, the corner of your mouth will meet his. You can feel your pulse thumping in the side of your neck. It dawns on you that you’re both simply waiting to see who is going to do it. “It’s not midnight,” Harry breathes. “Don’t tell me you’re a stickler for the rules.” The warmth and dew of his laugh grazes your cheek. With that, Harry brushes his mouth against yours. It feels painstakingly tender, like he’s never kissed anybody before. You’re so spellbound that you’re hardly even sure how to reciprocate something so soft. Harry’s bottom lip hovers over the very tip of your cupid’s bow just before he pulls away. Was that even a kiss? The very edges of your mouths had met, but only just. You still feel the tingle of where his lips had been moments ago. You open your eyes and Harry is a few inches away now, looking down at you. His hand is still ghosting the side of your face, like he’s afraid he might break you. When had your own hand slid flat against his chest beneath the lapel of his suit? “Is this a good idea?” you whisper, sliding your hand out to trace one of the round, fabric buttons with your fingertip. He swallows roughly. “Maybe not.” “Okay.” “Okay,” he yields. But neither of you move away. “Maybe this should just stay between us,” you suggest after a beat, heart sinking in your chest. “Well then if it’s just staying between us…” Before you have the chance to inhale, Harry presses his mouth against yours, harder, like he means it this time. His lips are warm and soft as they move with yours. You’re on your toes as one of his hands slides to the back of your neck, the other snaking around your waist to pull you into him. It still isn’t close enough. It’s surreal to be kissing him after a year. How much time had lapsed in total since you’d seen him that first day you moved in? How many mornings had been spent beside each other in silence? You’d spoken through side glances and subdued smiles from opposite corners of a crowded lift more than you ever truly had with words. But this… this feels like threads made up of every intimacy you’ve ever shared in this tiny room pulling you together at last. You pull apart just before the lift dings on the eighth floor. You’re both somewhat winded as you rest your foreheads together, and you release two unintended fistfuls of his jacket. Harry slides his hands down your bare arms to cup your elbows, his thumbs stroking circles in the soft crook of your forearm. “Have some water before you go to sleep.” “I will,” you chuckle. You’re unsure why either of you are speaking so softly, there’s no need. “Goodnight, Harry.” “Goodnight.” He says your name like a promise—like he’s determined to make up for all the days he didn’t get the chance to use it. You didn’t know it could sound like that. “Happy New Year’s.” You smile over your shoulder before padding barefoot into the hall as he reaches out to push the sixth-floor button for the second time. The last thing you’re able to see through the closing doors of the lift is Harry rubbing a thoughtful hand over his stubble, smiling down at his feet. (part two)
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tcm · 4 years ago
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Imitation of Lana Turner By Jessica Pickens
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Hollywood and its celebrities have influenced fashion and beauty trends since its inception. In 2017, Kim Kardashian popularized contouring face foundation, adding an extra step in routine application of makeup. Hairstylists across the United States in the 1990s mimicked Jennifer Aniston’s layered Friends haircut, and in the 1940s, Veronica Lake’s peekaboo bangs caused concerns about the dangers of women’s hairstyles in wartime factories.
One fashion and beauty influencer from the 1930s through the 1950s was one of Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer’s top stars: Lana Turner. From her early days as a pin-up girl to her peak of top glamour, Turner influenced beauty trends internationally. The trends of some of Turner’s contemporaries faded as times changed. Dorothy Lamour’s sarong went out of style and Lake’s one-eye-covered hairstyle was no longer in vogue as shorter haircuts of the 1950s became popular. But Turner evolved with her audiences.
In the late 1930s, audiences were introduced to her as a teen actress. By the 1940s, she was a bona fide star and a top World War II pin-up. In the 1950s, she became every inch the star — a sophisticated glamour queen. Throughout her career, her looks changed from red hair to long blonde tresses, to occasionally brunette. Swathed in Hollywood designs, furs and jewels, Turner influenced a number of trends throughout her film career.
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Every Inch the Star
It’s no wonder that Turner was influential on pop culture of the past and the present. Nicknamed “The headline girl,” Turner dominated the news – from her eight marriages and divorces and the murder of her boyfriend. She was also nicknamed “The Queen of the Night Clubs.” Whether it was Ciro’s, the Mocambo, the Cocoanut Grove or The Trocadero, Turner was a fixture of Hollywood nightlife. Her daughter and biographer Cheryl Crane wrote that when Turner made an entrance into a nightclub, bandleaders would start playing “You Stepped Out of a Dream” from ZIEGFELD GIRL (’41) and a hush would fall over the crowd.
The MGM commissary even named a dish after their top star: The Lanallure Salad. In addition to all of this, she proved to also be a great actress with performances in THE POSTMAN ALWAYS RINGS TWICE (‘46) and THE BAD AND THE BEAUTIFUL (‘52). Turner may have only stood 5’3”, but every inch of her was a star.
The Sweater Girl
Starting with her first movie, Turner was already setting trends and turning heads. In THEY WON’T FORGET (‘37), Turner’s character walks down the street in a form-fitting sweater — a sight audiences didn’t forget. This scene caused Lana Turner to be nicknamed “The Sweater Girl.” At 16 years old, Turner and her mother weren’t thrilled with the nickname. Turner was embarrassed and at one point said she was ashamed to face people. But it also influenced a trend of tight sweaters that emphasized the bust size.
“I believe it is no exaggeration to say that I have done more for the sweater than the sheep, the silkworm, or the Yale football team,” she said. The Sweater Girl trend continued throughout the 1940s and into the 1950s, with almost every major female star photographed in a tight sweater. In a December 16, 1949 article in The Pittsburgh Press, Harvey J. Scott is quoted as saying, "But our real problem is with bobbysoxers. They are the sweater girls — just kids showing off their curves and apparently liking it. What kind of mothers and wives are they going to be?”
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Global Influence
It wasn’t just American audiences who were fascinated with Turner’s glamour — her influence reached globally. Eva Perón (known as Evita) was the wife of Argentine President Juan Perón and she was First Lady of Argentina from 1946 until her death in 1952. Perón was known for her high-fashion wardrobe, which highlighted her rags-to-riches background. Perón was heavily influenced by Hollywood, especially when she wore her hair blonde.
During a visit to Argentina in February 1946, Lana Turner’s jewelry was seized by customs, which held her up for hours. “She learned that every piece was photographed to be copied later,” Crane wrote. While at a party during her visit, Turner felt Perón watching her the whole time. Perón was said to have copied fashions and hairstyles unique to Lana Turner. When Patti LuPone played Evita on Broadway, Turner met her backstage and shared this story with her as well, according to LuPone’s autobiography.
Another admirer was Spanish artist Salvador Dali. Turner was in Carmel at the same time as Dali, who she met over cocktails. Dali wanted to paint Turner but only wanted to paint the corners of her eyes. “You have the most beautiful corners of your eyes I have ever seen,” he said. Turner refused the offer for the painting.
Still Influential
Even though Lana Turner died in 1995, her legacy and influence lives on. In her 1990 song “Vogue,” Madonna lists Turner as one of the many other classic stars with style and grace. That same year, author James Ellroy worked Lana Turner into his neo-noir novel L.A. Confidential. Turner’s character is also mentioned in the 1997 film version and portrayed by Brenda Bakke. Singer Elizabeth Grant took on the stage name Lana Del Rey, influenced by Turner. The popular singer/songwriter was inspired by Turner’s first name and “Del Rey” came from the Ford Del Rey sedan. Releasing an album in March 2021, Del Rey’s style and moody musical sound is heavily influenced by vintage style and Los Angeles imagery.
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1ddotdhq · 4 years ago
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⭐️ Tues Sept 15 ‘20 🦊
Lots and lots to get through! Let’s start with an update from my favorite thing from yesterday: the source of the Louis/Harry/Niall LAX rumor was found! Was it the anonymous mystery account we were led to believe? No - of course not! It was actually a fanfic writer, who was throwing around ideas, and someone took them as fact (as people on twitter do), and ran with it. From there it became one messy game of twitter-phone and we were left with a big pile of nothing. Well, that’s what I get for going fact-checking on twitter, I guess.
Let’s talk about things that ARE happening, for sure: Harry cancelled the rest of his shows for 2020 (I thought he had already, but okay) while assuring people that “I really hope to play the shows as planned for 2021 but will continue monitoring the situation over the coming weeks and months”. Idk what to tell you there, H, but France already cancelled at least one show for you, so maybe it’s time to start considering other options?
A podcast with Olivia Wilde dropped today, where she discusses “Don’t Worry Darling”. About the project she said, “It’s a wild and weird and totally bizarre film that we’re making, and we’re making it in the time of COVID which is wild in itself, and it’s such an endeavor. It’s something I’m so excited about in every single way, every single person who is a part of it–the people you mention, people who I can’t mention. What can I say.” This was recorded BEFORE it was confirmed that H was on board for the movie, so he wasn’t at all mentioned, but she describes the project as “fucking batshit - it’s nuts”. Maybe I’m gonna have to get over my aversion to thrillers and make it to the theatres for this one!
And, in another odd follow up from yesterday, Harry is rumored to be in a DIFFERENT Marvel project: he might be playing the MCU’s Starfox in an upcoming movie, although no title has been released, and there has been no official confirmation. The rumor started when a Netflix writer (Kris Tapley) said on September 11th that “Don’t Worry Darling” would be H’s SECOND project since Dunkirk “if we’re counting the Marvel movie no one knows he’s in”. Once again - this is not official, but the discourse around this potential project has, of course, taken off, and it is Mixed. Many fans (myself included!) would love to see him in a Marvel movie. A few others think that “he does not look like a superhero”. To those people, I’d like to pose a question: what does a superhero look like? Answer: like someone who plays a superhero. That’s it. That’s the only criteria.
If that wasn’t enough, Harry himself popped up in a fan pic in London. He HAS indeed shaved his mustache - and his beard lol - but his HAIR! Well, THAT was a TRENDING TOPIC worldwide today on twitter. It’s, um, curly and parted to the right, in case you’re wondering, in a wonderful imitation of Liam’s haircut. Do you think they share a hair stylist????
You know who HASN’T appeared anywhere, despite the Daily Fail’s publishing an article that says he’s been in LA throughout quarantine? Louis! He has been aggressively MIA for most of quarantine, and the few times he HAS been spotted, it’s been in and around London, and once in Doncaster for Lottie’s birthday. You know where he HASN’T been? Los Angeles! Sorry, but somebody better tell the media to get their stories straight square - he’s either in London with Eleanor or in LA with Freddie, but not both at the same time. I don’t know where he is, but rest assured that it isn’t with the Jungwirths/Clarks, who have been documenting every outing they have taken (kids included!) during this global pandemic. And, in fact, smart money says that neither option is what is happening!
Meanwhile, Niall got himself into some hot water on twitter, for, uh, making a joke? Yahoo.com put out an article that was called “Hear Me Out: Niall Horan Was The Best Member of One Direction”, to which Niall replied, “I’m listening 😂”. People....did not like that, and proclaimed that he was being “disrespectful” (oooh, buzzword!) to his other band mates by interacting at all. Niall then confirmed that he had not actually READ the article, he just thought the title was funny, and said, in what can only be read as an exasperated tone, “What’s everyone fighting with me over now? 😂”.
In other news, STREAM PILLOWTALK was also trending worldwide today, as fans try to get the music video to one BILLION view, so, you know, do it!
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xjoonchildx · 5 years ago
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airplane, pt. 2 | jjk x reader chapter five: home
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pairing: jungkook/reader
word count: 2.9K rating: 18+
genre: smut | silly smut | nonsensical smut
warnings:  criminal!jungkook, koreanamerican!jungkook, reality has left the chat, plausibility has left the chat
A/N: i've never had so much anxiety posting an update. next time i decide to fly by the seat of my pants and turn a one-shot into a full chaptered fic, just punch me in the face, okay?
all kidding aside, standard smut warnings apply to this chapter and i really hope you guys like it.
xoxo
Chapter 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06
artwork by the shmexy @ppersonna​ who’s smut is even better than her art
*****************************
“You broke into my house.”
It takes you a solid minute to find the breath to power that shaky sentence.
Your legs are already like noodles from your run and at this point they are threatening to come right out from underneath you. You reach a hand out to the wall to stop yourself from hitting the deck.
Jungkook stands slowly from where he’s seated on the couch, a careful smile on his lips.  
“You gonna call the cops?”
You stare at him.
Jungkook is in the country.  In Los Angeles. In your living room .  
He’s wearing a leather jacket over a t-shirt and jeans and his hair is cut short again.  He is alive and in one piece and looks somehow even more handsome than he did the last time you saw him.  How does he do that?
You’re so distracted by Jungkook -- in your fucking house -- that you miss the look of concern that comes over him the longer you stand there without saying something.  It’s like your brain is hung up -- glitching -- trying to process the scene in front of you.
“You okay?”
“You broke into my house ,” you say again, as though that should answer his question.
“That is a matter of semantics,” Jungkook argues.  “I would say that I let myself in because I knew you wouldn’t want me just standing around outside. Aren’t you the one always telling me to keep a low profile?”
A disbelieving laugh bubbles up your chest.
His sarcasm is comforting, even right now, when your heart is still racing and you can’t seem to stop sweating and you’ve just realized that you’re pretty fucking pissed that he dropped off the radar and didn’t contact you for weeks.  
“So we should probably talk, huh?”
“You think?”
Now it’s his turn to laugh. He sinks back down onto the couch and gestures for you to join him. 
You don’t.
“How the hell did you get here?” you demand.
“Same way I got out, pretty much,” he shrugs.  “Mexico. Hitched a ride to San Diego and Yoongi was able to pick me up there. Good thing I’m not from Iowa or some shit, huh?”
He aims a hopeful smile at you like he’s searching for a way to connect but you don’t return it.
A flash of disappointment crosses his face.
“Yeah,” you say quietly. “Good thing.”
You look down to his lap.  His hands haven’t stopped moving, fingers winding together and unwinding over and over.  He’s nervous.  
Well, good.
“I’m gonna turn myself in tomorrow,” he says after a long moment.
He knocks the wind out of you with that.
“Holy shit,” you breathe.
“Yeah.  Turns out, I’m being represented by some incredibly-connected, high-dollar attorney.”  He looks up and fixes you with those dark, hypnotic eyes. “Any idea where I could have gotten one of those?”
Seokjin, you fucking angel.
“Maybe,” you murmur.  “What did he say?”
“Well, he told me to get my happy ass back to the States.  Said the Marshals would appreciate me walking in on my own as opposed to having to drag me back.  Said I’m going to have to eat some crow if I expect them to listen to anything I have to say.”
He rubs a hand across the back of his neck, against the grain of the now short hairs at his nape.
“Told me to get a haircut, too.”
That makes you smile.  Jin is nothing if not thorough.
“So what does -- “ you clear your throat, “ -- your attorney say about what happens after that?”
“No way to know for sure,” Jungkook admits.  “They could lock me up and throw away the key or they could decide on something else.  Kind of a roll of the dice at this point.”
Your chest squeezes at the thought of Jungkook walking into that Federal Building and leaving in a transport van.  You shut your eyes like that will somehow stop the mental image.
“And you’re turning yourself in anyway.”
He fidgets with his ear like an anxious kid.  
“Yeah.”
“Alright,” you say on a shaky exhale.  “Okay. Wow.”
A tense silence falls between you.
“I need you to talk to me,” Jungkook says after a moment. “I need to know where your head is at right now.”
Do you know how hard I went to bat for you? you want to scream, which is unfair, really.  He’s never asked you for your help. Everything you’ve done, you’ve done on your own. But now he’s here and in front of you and you are practically buzzing with the urge to vent your frustration at him.
“Why didn’t I hear from you?”  
You hope like hell you’re the only one who can hear the thread of insecurity in your voice.  “You had the burner number and I just -- never heard from you again. And now you’re in my house.”
“I know,” he admits.  His fingers keep lacing together, unlacing. “I know it’s really fucked up to just ambush you like this. It’s just that shit got really hairy for me in Nicaragua. These guys stole my phone.”
“But you managed to call Yoongi,” you snap.
“Well yeah,” he fires back. “We’ve known each other since we were kids.  I’ve had his number for years. I got in touch with him as soon as I could get my hands on a new burner.”
You tell yourself to relax.
You tell yourself that it’s a totally plausible explanation and put a hand to your forehead as though you expect to be able to feel your temperature coming down.  As though you’ll be able to feel the anger draining out of you until all that’s left is the relief that he’s here, that he’s okay.
You take a deep breath, release the tension that’s had you wound so tight.
“I left the bureau.”
Jungkook’s eyes widen.
“Holy shit,” he breathes, “Did they -- Did I -- “
“Don’t give yourself too much credit,”  you cut in, rolling your eyes. “It wasn’t really about you.  Not all of it, anyway.”
He opens his mouth to say something, but thinks better of it. There is a melancholy in his eyes that unnerves you.
You’ve seen him cocky and arrogant and unrepentant and flirtatious. But this — this hat-in-hand version of him, devoid of his trademark bravado is so disconcerting.  
He looks away from you, back down to his hands.  You wrap your arms around yourself and take a moment to just look at him, to appreciate his striking face.  You think back to the first time you saw that face, how dumbfounded you’d been by his physical appearance.
Then he opened his mouth and your fate was sealed.
One way or another this debacle ends in just a few short hours.
The rational part of you craves a conclusion to this insanity, an end to the near-constant anxiety you’ve felt for months now.  But there’s the other part of you that worries this will end with Jungkook behind bars for the rest of his life. You don’t know if you’re ready to accept that just yet.
“Can you um --“ Jungkook wets his lips, “-- can you come sit with me?”
“Yeah,” you agree quietly.  
You cross the room and slide next to him on the couch.  
He reaches for your hands, but does not meet your eyes.  His fingers stroke over your wrists and not for the first time you wonder how he manages to make the most simple touches feel so good.
“You asked me one time,” he starts quietly, “about why I quit school. And I -- “
“Don’t -- ” you interrupt, “-- you don’t owe me an explanation.”
He shakes his head.
“Uh yeah,” he chuckles cynically.  “Yeah, I do. I owe you pretty much any explanation you want at this point.”
You look down at where your hands are joined, down to where Jungkook is rubbing the calloused pad of one thumb against your palm.
“My mom got sick.  And it didn’t feel right to stay in school when I could be working and helping to bring in some money.”
You remember the dig you made at him -- the way his face had shuttered -- and you feel an acute pang of guilt.
“I’m so s --”
“No, listen to me please,” he says adamantly.  “She’s doing a lot better now and I don’t want you to feel sorry for me. But I need you to know that for every good thing I’ve ever done, I have done something equally as fucked up. And I just want -- “
He exhales heavily, scrubs one hand along his jaw.
“ -- I just want you to know that this shit with the money and the running is just some of me. I’ve done some really stupid shit but that’s not all I am.”  He leans closer to you, pins you with that bottomless gaze.  “I need you to understand that. Am I making any sense?”
You swear you can feel your heart squeeze in response.
“Yeah, you are,” you say softly.  He reaches one hand out to cup your cheek.
“So can I kiss you now or are you still mad at me?”
You’re tempted to tease him but he looks so unsure of himself in this moment that you resist.  You look down at yourself, remember you are still in sweaty running gear and cringe imagining what you must look like at this moment.
“I’m gross,” you protest in a whisper.
He leans closer, mouth hovering just over yours.
“Ask me if I care.”
******************************
Jungkook at least has the decency to let you shower before taking to you bed.
But just barely.
The second you are clean and dry he’s on you, mouth and hands everywhere at once.  Your skin -- already warm from the hot water -- heats even more under his touch.
He’s different tonight you think, as you lie back on your bed and his lips work up the column of your throat.  There’s a determination to the way he’s holding you, an urgency to the way he’s pressing his body against yours.  
You stroke your hands down his back, feel the answering ripple of muscle underneath your fingertips.  His body is leaner than it was in Puerto Rico and the realization sparks a sad throb in your chest.  
Nicaragua must have been a lot tougher than he’s letting on.
But then his lips skate across your collarbone and you force yourself to push the thought from your mind. Whatever happened to him there is over.  He’s here and he’s okay and he is literally on top of you and that’s the only thing you want to think about right now.
“I missed you,” he whispers and a shudder runs up your spine in response.  
You rake your nails against his nape, fingers teasing his freshly cut hairline and he makes a satisfied groan against your mouth, pressing his hips firmly into yours.
It’s impossible at this point to ignore the nudge of his hard cock against your stomach.  You snake a hand between your bodies to wrap warm fingers around his pulsing length and he pulls back to suck in a pained breath.
“Jungkook, I -- “ you start to speak, but an uncomfortable tickle in the back of your throat stops you.  He opens his eyes to look down at you.
“You okay?”
Hell no, you’re not okay.  
It feels like if you open your mouth to answer him, you’ll cry and you are not a crier and he’s looking at you expectantly, waiting for you to say something -- anything.
“Yeah, I just…um,” you stumble over your words and it takes a moment for that uncomfortable feeling to subside long enough for you to speak. You have to wait until your voice comes out even and controlled before you can finish.
“I missed you, too,” you say, finally.
His lips curve into a small smile.  
“I know you did.”
He drops his mouth down to pull at one soft nipple with his lips and teeth.  You sigh, arching into his touch.
The soft exhalation seems to set Jungkook off, makes the steady grind of his hips pick up in speed.  He tongues at your nipples until they are aching and hard then slips a finger into your channel to test your wetness.
He brings his mouth close to your ear, breath warm against the shell.
“I can feel just how much you missed me,” he teases in a low voice.
Arrogant bastard.  He’s right, though.  
You huff a laugh as his fingers work in and out of you slowly, drawing out your wetness. He covers your mouth with his as his thumb rubs slow circles against your clit and you moan into his kiss.
“Fuck me,” you say quietly and you feel the tremors that run down his back at your words.  “Please,” you beg, “I don’t want to wait anymore.”
Jungkook kisses you again -- long and hard -- before pulling away to grab a condom from his jeans.  
You take the moment to appreciate how handsome he is, chest covered in a sheen of sweat, lean body tense with the need for release.  You watch the corded bands of his arms move as he crawls back onto the bed, sheathed and ready. He leans his weight on his forearms and the muscles in his shoulders become even more prominent as he lines his body up with yours.
You lift your head to suck at the hollow of his neck just as you feel the blunt tip of his cock nudge your entrance.  
“Do it, Jungkook,” you moan, rolling your hips against him. “ Now.”
He groans as he obliges you, pushing slowly inside and you brace your hands around the tight muscles of his arms until you can feel him anchored deep.  
“Fuck,” he whispers. “Every time it’s like I forget how good you feel.”
Strange how you were just thinking the same thing -- thinking about how no one else has ever pulled these responses out of you.  It’s like your body knows this man -- like it knew him way before your brain ever did.
He rocks into you slowly, deeply, pelvis flush with yours each time he strokes to the hilt.  His pace is languorous and it makes your entire body feel heavy with pleasure. You wrap your legs around him tight, willing him deeper even though you know that’s not possible.
The painfully unhurried rhythm is so, so good , but it’s not enough.  
Not when you can feel the threat of your release building between your legs and you need more to get you there.  You angle your hips up, trying to capture more of the friction.
Jungkook takes the hint, moving one hand to cup your ass. He pulls you into each snap of his hips, forces you to take every inch on every thrust.
“Come for me,” he pants. “I can’t hold out much longer.”
You can only whine your response, too fucked out at this point to form sentences.  It takes just a few more deep, desperate thrusts to make you start to unravel. Jungkook lets go the instant he feels you start to quiver around him and he doesn’t back off, lacing his fingers into yours and pinning you down into the mattress with the full force of his body.
Once the loud moaning and desperate movements slow to a stop, he drops his forehead down on yours.
The two of you breathe each other’s air for a while until your chests stop heaving and your hearts stop pounding.
***********************
“When does this all go down?” you whisper, cheek pressed to Jungkook’s chest.  
You’ve spent the last five minutes enjoying a warm, comfortable silence.
But that hasn’t stopped your mind from wandering back into worry.
Jungkook presses the length of your body into his side with one firm hand. You feel him tense when you ask the question.
“10 AM.”
“10 AM,” you echo numbly.  
“Yeah,” he whispers, stroking lazy patterns with his fingers down your back.  
“So,” he clears his throat. “Are you...ready to talk about what’s going on here?”
You’re glad that from this angle he can’t see your reaction, can’t see the flush that spreads over your face.
“No,” you mumble childishly.
“You’re such a brat,” he teases, dropping a kiss on your hair. “So fine. I’ll do the talking then.  I met someone.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah. She’s got her head on straight, and…” he trails off for a moment.  “...she’s got me thinking about how I can get my head on straight, too.”
You smile into his skin.
“What’s she like?”
“Well, she’s a lot of different things at once. Kinda feisty, super smart, very cool,” he murmurs.  “Unemployed, but hey — no one’s perfect.”
Your shoulders shake with laughter.
“Is she hot?”
“Nah,” he teases, and he jumps when you pinch his stomach.  “Way better than hot. She’s beautiful. And she’s into me.  Really, really into me.”
Your cheeks heat but you keep the tone light.
“How do you know she’s not just using you for sex?”
“Well in the beginning she was,” he chuckles. “But then she showed up for me in a big way. A really big way. So even though it’s really hard for her to come out and say how much she likes me, I already know. She’s already shown me.”
That uncomfortable itch in your throat returns when he says that. It’s so weird to be understood so thoroughly by someone you barely know.
“She sounds pretty amazing,” you say after the sensation subsides long enough for you to speak.
“Yeah, she is,” he whispers. “So I’m gonna go to this meeting tomorrow morning and try to fix the mess I’ve made. Cause maybe now I have a reason to stop being such a reckless asshole.”
You screw your eyes shut and will the unexpected tears that spring to your eyes not to fall.
“10 AM, right?”
He drops another kiss into your hair and pulls your body in closer.
“Yeah. 10 AM.”
**********************
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1eos · 4 years ago
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i think what fucks me up the most about the kind of reconstruction plastic surgery is that youre never going to get your actual face back. people seem to treat plastic surgery (even on those levels) as a simple haircut and I Am Concerned™
omg you’re so right. i was watching a youtube video abt some random los angeles influencer nd her nd all her friends were like ‘omg we look so old (they  are all in their early 20s) we need to get this surgery nd this one nd this one’ nd it was so casual like ik i take my face way too seriously but ever since i saw what happened to michael jackson’s nose cuz he kept fucking with it as a kid i just became terrified of what happens when u run out of cartilage to fuck with!
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emmy-writes-sometimes · 5 years ago
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Seeing Green
When your dad forces you to come to a movie premiere with him, you get more hatred than you bargain for. 
-
           “Do I have to go?” You groaned, “can’t Grandma be your date again or something?” Your dad shook his head as he struggled to tie his tie in the mirror of his bedroom. It was the Los Angeles premiere of his newest movie, and normally he flew out one of your aunts, Scott, or your grandparents to be his date. But suddenly you were watching him try on a suit that supposedly matched a set of dresses he wanted you to wear because for some reason, he was determined to make a father-daughter date out of it.
           “Nope. She didn’t want to fly out last minute since they’re watching your cousins for the weekend already. Go ahead and start getting ready and I’ll leave the dress on your door,” he instructed. You wanted him to believe that the only reason you didn’t want to go was because it was last minute, but that was a bit of an exaggeration. You didn’t want to go because you absolutely dreaded what the world would say. They already looked at you with sympathetic eyes because of who he was, and because of the situation with your lack of a mother. But lately, since you were getting older and couldn’t pull off the cute kid look anymore, things were getting harder. The press was suddenly watching you. If you gained a few pounds and your dad posted a picture of you, they were watching. If you got a bad haircut, they were watching. If you were doing anything except being Chris Evans’s perfect daughter, they were watching you. And you hated it. You just wanted a normal night in with your family, but that was obviously not happening.
           “I hate you,” you joked in response. Your dad just chuckled.
           “Yeah, I love you too.” You walked away and started getting ready, taking a long, hot shower before doing your hair and makeup. A blue, floor-length dress with flowers on the skirt was hanging on your doorknob by the time you were ready, and to no surprise, it fit perfectly. Your dad had people come measure you every time you grew a single inch just so that you always had clothes that fit properly.
           “You look beautiful,” your dad insisted as you walked out of your room, carrying your heels so you wouldn’t have to put them on yet.
           “I’m only going if you promise to buy me Fatburger after,” you responded, crossing your arms over the dress. It was pretty, but the chest area was definitely itchy. You much preferred one of your old t-shirts.
           “I will buy you all the Fatburger you want,” he chuckled. “Thank you for coming with me.”
           “You’re welcome. I guess it looks stupid if you’re alone.”
           “I hate going to these things in general, you know that.” That was definitely a lie; he was a people person. He loved any kind of human interaction he could get. And he was fueled by all of the positivity that came out of it. That was another reason you were dreading going – you didn’t want him to know what people were saying about you, even if it took everything in you not to go cry to him about it.
           You just didn’t respond – you scrolled through your phone and took a few funny pictures to send to your friends until the car got there. The entire time, your dad was coaching you like he hadn’t made you go through media training when he got you your first phone and let you get social media. You knew who not to engage with. You knew not to wander off unless you were with someone from the theater or from his management. You knew to walk a few feet behind him until he asked you to stand beside him. You knew all of that already. It didn’t stop the anxiety, though, when the car pulled up to the Dolby and you saw the massive crowd. You fiddled with your phone until it was time to put it into the small bag you brought.
           “Okay, how do I look?” Your dad joked as he prepared to get out. You just gave him a thumbs-up and watched as he got out first, then came to your side and got you out of the car. You tried to ignore the cameras, sucking in your stomach, trying to stand taller, making sure your hair was on the right side of your shoulder. You watched your dad work the carpet like he was born to do it, which he was. And then he held out a hand and you walked toward him, taking his hand.
           “Smile, babe, you look gorgeous,” he insisted. So you did. He walked up to the area where fans were allowed to wait and you stood beside him, watching him sign autograph after autograph.
           “Who’s this?” One reporter asked Chris as he signed autographs.
           “My daughter, Y/n,” Chris smiled back at her. “Y/n, babe, stand here.” He instructed you to stand closer to him as he started walking again. You could feel the anxiety building up when you saw more reporters, but your dad knew how to get you through it. You grabbed onto his hand and finally followed him into the theater. It wasn’t quiet in there, either, and you could feel yourself going into overload as you got your first social media alerts of the night.
           “You okay?” Your dad asked you, squeezing your hand. You nodded. “Alright. I’m gonna go say hi to some people. Seats should be reserved in there so you can go ahead and sit down.” You nodded again and brushed past him, walking into the screening room and sitting down. You opened your phone to see a few headlines containing your handle.
           Chris Evans takes daughter Y/N on date to the Dolby!
           Chris Evans’s Daughter is All Gown Up!
           The first few weren’t particularly terrible. They were just pictures of you that had somehow already made it online. But then you noticed the people were actually mentioning you, and that was where it got bad.
           Is he really so desperate to take her? Yikes…
           Literally forgot he even had a kid...
           If only she wasn’t ugly af
           You could feel the tears coming to your eyes and shoved your phone back into your purse, putting it on the ground beside you. The last thing you wanted was for your dad to see any of those, and thankfully he didn’t check Twitter very often.
           “Hey, you okay?” He asked as he finally took a seat next to you.
           “Yeah,” you lied, “just a little overwhelming.” He put an arm on the back of your seat as you waited for the movie to start. It was a good movie, one of the best he’d been in. At least in your opinion. The role had been really hard on him and he played it so well that you could barely even believe he had been able to come home at the end of the day without it affecting him. But the entire time, your attention kept getting pulled to the messages you had seen earlier. You ended up shaking your leg so much with anxiety that your dad put his hand on it to make it stop, only removing it when you mouthed to him that everything was fine. You were just worried that they would multiply and get worse and worse and worse until it was impossible for them to ignore. You didn’t want him to be ashamed of you, but some twisted part of you thought that maybe the internet could convince him to be.
           “I’ll meet you back at the car,” you said as soon as the movie ended. You stood up shakily, grabbing your purse, and only then did you realize how hasty you were being. Your dad, poor guy, was confused as hell.
           “What? What’s wrong?”
           “I just don’t feel good,” you lied. “I’ll meet you back at the car.”
           “Text me when you make it there. I’ll see you in a few minutes.” You felt like you were going to throw up as you walked out of the theater, past the cameras that wouldn’t stop taking worthless pictures of you, and one of the security guards directed you to the car that was waiting to take you and your dad back home.
           Made it to the car, you texted him. He responded with a thumbs up, which meant he was too busy to text. Another alert popped up on your phone and, exactly like you were worried about, your mentions were flooded with comments. So many of them were nice – saying you looked just like your dad, saying that you were so pretty, but others were terrible. And those were the ones that got you. They got you so hard that you were sitting in the back of the Tahoe, crying all of your makeup off. You didn’t even realize you were letting it all out until you heard the door open and your dad got in, immediately noticing something was wrong.
           “What’s wrong?” He asked. “Are you sick?” He extended a hand to check your forehead, and you just swatted it away.    
           “People are just fucking mean,” you responded, half frustrated. He must have notice because he didn’t comment on your bad language one bit.
           “Give me your phone,” he ordered. You did, unlocking it for him, and he scrolled. He chewed on his lip as he did, looking from your crying figure to the phone and back again. And eventually he just shut it off and put it back on the car’s floor. You didn’t say anything, but you didn’t have to.
           “You realize these are people who are just bored, right? They’re bored so they’re picking on you?” He sounded angry, but he played it off well.
           “But…”
           “They’re just jealous of you, that’s all. They’re being mean because they can, and you’re letting them.” You sniffled a little. His voice softened and so did his face, and he quickly took your hand and squeezed when he realized he wasn’t helping.
           “Then why do I feel so bad?”
           “Because. You have to stop letting these people get the better of you.”
           “But…”
           “No buts. Promise me you’ll just stop looking at these? Or at least taking them seriously? I don’t want you to think any of these matter because they don’t. Stop crying over people who don’t even know you.”
           “Thanks, I’m cured,” you grumbled. You tried to smile, but another tear fell from your eye.
           “They’re just seeing green, honey. They’re just pissed ‘cause they don’t have a cool dad like me.” You laughed this time, letting your dad pull you in for another hug. “Now. Are we still getting dinner, or are you going to let the internet convince you we shouldn’t?”
Hope the person who requested enjoys!! ❤️ 
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