#Kelier

[cosmerelists]

If Cosmere characters played Terraria...

Previously, Stormlight characters played Stardew Valley. Now, let’s say the Cosmere characters all had access to the computer game Terraria. What would that be like?

1. Adolin: Very excited by all of the swords

Shallan:  Adolin, love, you don’t have to carry around ALL of your new swords.

Adolin: I can’t leave any behind!!

2. Wayne: Very excited by all of the hats

Wax: Why are you fighting with the sparkle wand?? You HAVE the ice sword!

Wayne: Don’t ya see the wizard hat I’m wearing??

3. Steris: Takes care of chest organization & base building while Wax fights

Steris: And THIS chest is filled with all ingredients needed to make buff potions that lend bonuses to combat skills, whereas this chest contains ingredients that make buff potions related to defense or speed.

Steris: The appropriate crafting stations are right above as well.

Wax: T-That’s amazing!

4. Renarin: Keeps throwing himself into fights totally unprepared

Adolin: W-wait! Did you buff at all?

Renarin: (using a wooden bow against the Eye) Come again?

5. Sebarial: Spends all his money getting the best gear

Sabarial: Well, it took 50 platinum, but all of my gear is now “Warding.”

Palona: While you were doing that, I beat Skeletron.

Sabarian: Heeey, my strategy worked! 

6. Szeth: Speedruns

Szeth: What is speedrunning?

Szeth: I simply killed all of the bosses immediately and in order.

7. Raoden: Builds ideal houses for all of the NPCs in their preferred biomes

Raoden: All the walls are bright colors! Everything is clean!

Raoden: And I dyed all my clothes orange immediately, of course.

8. Vivenna: Builds simple but effective homes for all NPCs

Vivenna: I also put all of the paintings away into boxes, where the colors won’t scare them.

Siri: Vivenna...

9. Denth: Puts all the NPCs in NPC prisons.

Denth: You know what I hate most about being a mercenary?

Denth: If you build tiny, prisonlike homes for all of your Villagers, people think your gameplay reflects your character.

Denth: Instead of it just being the simplest and most effective way of housing them all!

Tonk Fah: Hey, is it time to drop the Guide in lava yet?

Denth: Don’t mind him. 

10. Kaladin: Protects the NPCs

Moash: Kaladin, please. They literally just respawn with new names if they die.

Kaladin: EDWIN, NO! STAY INSIDE--IT’S A BLOOD MOON!!

11. Vin: Gets a grappling hook as soon as she feasibly can

Vin: [soaring through the caverns]

Elend: (dying from fall damage for the 19th time): How do you do that so well???

12. Eshonai: Plays on the hardest difficulty

Eshonai: It’s the only way to experience everything the game has to offer.

Eshonai: I also play on the largest world!

Venli: The biomes literally just repeat.

Eshonai: So many new caves to explore!

13. Lift: Plays on the easiest difficulty

Lift: Because I’m just a little kid!

Wyndle: Y-You just SHREDDED the Destroyer!

14. Dalinar: Becomes deeply invested in the lore.

Dalinar: “You feel an evil presence watching you.”

Dalinar: ...

Dalinar: But what do those words mean?

15. Kelsier: Uses glitches

Kelsier: And by spawning a thousand ducks from this duck statue, I ensure that only the head of the Destroyer spawns! No probes at all!

Vin: Wow, how did you learn that?

Kelsier: There’s always another secret.

[memurfevur-archive]

Heeeeeey.... Elidaaaaaae. Rumor has it that you're talking to some uhhhhhh Goldblood guy. The name "Kelier" ring any bells to ya?

"Nyeheheh, meowbe~ ( •̀ ω •́ )✧"

[kelierprinter]

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[arcane-trolls]

[Celest was staring intently at the dozens of star charts she'd created herself, concentrating like she was reading a second or third language. She was enclosed in her observatory, her personal sanctuary where everything was in its place and no one was making her anxious. This was her place of peace—but that peace wouldn't last long.]

[The door flew open and in came her favorite pair of Mid-Ring Fae! Kelier came skidding into the room, doing a dramatic spin and sliding toward her on his knees, speaking in his usual sing-songy tone.]

hELLo youR hIghnEss!

[Delvic hovered above him, grinning at their friend. They were always happy to see Celest- and always happy to be a delightful distraction.]

🌺Are you ready for the party, princess?🌺

@ask-another-cringey-fantroll

[arcane-trolls]

[For now, the Teal princex paid the jade no mind, currently chatting with their own betrothed- the cerulean knew, he had to, but the degree to which he cared was questionable. Hell, he was the one covering for them whenever they slipped off with the adulterous princess. All under Azulim’s nose.

Strangely enough, it felt like someone was watching Sozira. The cerulean heiress observed her with curious eyes, a small smile on her face.]

[The trees had all shifted to magnificent hues, the summer flowers had all faded, and the harvest was in full swing, which meant one thing- the Harvest Ball was in full swing. The first day of the festival was spent in the individual courts, and the second was spent in the valley of the Burgundy Court, deep in the forest. There was a fire blazing, the smell of cooking food filled the air. The night sky shined with stars, swinging benches hanging from the trees. A ring of glowing mushrooms surrounded the clearing, giving clear bounds to anyone who may be foolish enough to consider crashing a fae party. The royals of the courts had already arrived, except for the Upper Ring- they always arrived last, as their was always such a fuss that it stopped the party for awhile. The Lower- and Mid Ring fae were given a chance to socialize, before the higher-ups arrived and briefly put a halt to things. Delicately draped across a bench was the most desired faerie of their generation- Princess Theina, the crown princess of the Cerulean Court. Some rumored that she was painted by Dawnte himself, given life by Mirthl, and sent to the world by the trickster Tumult, to torment them all with an untouchable flower. And untouchable she was- Kelier stood as a loyal guard, keeping anyone who would dare approach his precious cousin at bay. Still, a daring few vied for her attention as she watched with serene disinterest.]

[Sozira resided closer to the trees, sipping a drink made with honey as she watched the lower courts over the edge of her glass. Things would be more interesting once Azulim arrived with his unfaithful fiance, who would undoubtedly break away from him to fawn over Delvic. She had a plan for those two.

She personally didn't have a problem with cheating on your betrothed—but not when your betrothed was of the purple court, not when he was her moirail. No. That won't do.]

@arcane-trolls

[aliworldtrade]

Chengdu Kelier Electronic Co., Ltd.

0086-028-61348908 0086-13880236603

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[azmanjaeh]

kelier... #cheesnan #ayamtandoori (at De Naina Jelapang, Meru Valley)

[kelierprinter]

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[memurfevur-archive]

Hey Elidae!! How was 12th Perigee Eve for you? :0

"Great! I annoyed Kelier by spamming his Discorpse with purrigee mewsic AND I got Eskitty a 99-games-in-1 board game set. So today was purretty easy-going with games and warm cocoa! I can't send Evilon anything, but I did wish him a happy purrigee too."

[memurfevur-archive]

He uh.... Tends to keep himself out of the public eye honestly. He's a little closed off, ig kind of a recluse? But he's a decent guy from what I've heard of him. Lives in a massive section of private land near the ocean. Maybe you could ask Kelier to do some digging into him? Kel's already terminally online anyways.

He shrugs, "Guess it wouldn't hurt. =(* ￣︿￣)= "

[memurfevur-archive]

Elidae. It's Kelier we're talking about. The guy who's basically isolated himself all of his life. I don't really think he'd care too much. Besides, I think it might be nice to like.. KNOW other people in his well uh... Position? Situation? I'm not sure how I'd describe it. But how you're a descendant of The Disciple and he's a descendant of The Psiioniic.

Elidae's eyes widened, obviously familiar with the Psiioniic name. After a moment of awkward silence, giggles began to trail from his lips, slowly rising in volume and ferocity. He brings a hand to his head, as if that could help to stifle the radiating disbelief crowding his mind.

"Of course he is! Look, it wouldn't be a good idea if that's the case. They'd try to find a way to scoop him in, make him a part of their religion. Legacies... they're a powerful shadow. （；´д｀）ゞ

"If I can find a way to get my furiends out, hell, for ME to get out clawmpletely, then meowbe... Hmm.. Meowbe I can talk Agnize into letting Evilon and the others out for... a night? He's the most reasonable in that stupid place..."

[memurfevur-archive]

Hey Elidae. So uh.... You know like- Other "descendants" or whatever term you use for yourself. Have you considered introducing Kelier to them? Since he's, y'know, in the same boat as you.

Elidae blinks at you with a furrowed brow.

"...You know efuryone who exists is a descendant of someone, right? I don't think I follow-- "

He then perked up, his eyes wide, a light flush to his cheeks.

"Oh! Do mew mean... the others furom the church? I guess I could but I don't really want him to think of me any diffurently beclaws I'm a part of this stupid religion... =(；′⌒`)="

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[arcane-trolls]

((my tags are being weird, don’t acknowledge this

[kelierprinter]

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