#Kari Maaren

[specialagentartemis]

tell me more about classic filk i know a few songs but never got deep into it

Heck YEAH

"Filk" is music (often but not always folk music-style, often but not always song parodies to the tune of famous pre-existing songs) about sci-fi, fantasy, and other fannish topics. Filk circles are popular events at science fiction conventions, and that's really where the genre started. The word "filk" actually arose from a typo in a convention program once, and people just rolled with it ever since!

Some of the most iconic albums in the filk world are the anthology albums "Minus Ten And Counting" (songs about space exploration and the real-life space program), "Carmen Miranda's Ghost" (songs about sci-fi space shenanigans and space ghosts), and "Finity's End: Songs of the Station Trade" (songs set in the world of CJ Cherryh's Alliance-Union novels, and my personal favorite. I've never read any of CJ Cherryh's books, but these songs paint such a vivid world.) "Space Heroes and Other Fools" is another big one, it's more hit-or-miss for me but it's iconic. Other really good and foundational ones are "Divine Intervention" by Julia Ecklar, "Avalon is Risen" by Leslie Fish, and "We Are Who We Are" by Vixy & Tony.

I lean more towards sci-fi and space than fantasy, but fantasy and paganism are huuuugely popular filk topics too.

Some of the most popular names to look into include Leslie Fish (intensely prolific, barely a fraction of her work is on any streaming or music service), Julia Ecklar (famous for her "ose," the filk-world word for sad songs - because they're "ose, more-ose, and even more-ose), Juanita Coulson, Kristoph Klover, Vic Tyler (who just recently died :( rest in peace), Duane Elms, Kathy Mar, Bob Kanefsky, Alexander James (trans, with lots of filk under his previous name as well), Vixy & Tony, and Seanan McGuire. (I like Seanan McGuire's filk music better than her books, hah.) Some other great ones include Cat Faber (most acapella), Astrisoni, The PDX Broadsides, Kari Maaren, and Sassafrass (also mostly acapella. Includes Ada Palmer). Heather Dale, Tom Lehrer, and Jonathan Coulton are kind of honorary filkers too haha.

The best place to get the ones from 80s and 90s cassettes are on the Internet Archive or Youtube; a few filkers who are more currently active have their stuff on Bandcamp.

And I'll leave you with a few of my Favorite Ever filk songs:

"Sam Jones" by CJ Cherryh and Leslie Fish

"Pushin' the Speed of Light" by Julia Ecklar and Anne Prather

"Chickasaw Mountain" by Leslie Fish

"Fire in the Sky" by Jordan Kare

"The Phoenix" by Julia Ecklar

"Freedom of the Snow" by Leslie Fish

"Burn it Down" by Vixy & Tony

"Hope Eyrie" by Leslie Fish, or this Minus Ten And Counting version

"Rocket Rider's Prayer" by Kristoph Klover, Ernie Mansfield, and Cecilia Eng

"Dawson's Christian" by Duane Elms, performed by Vic Tyler or Vixy & Tony

"Somebody Will" by Sassafrass

"Chances & Choices & Fortunes & Fates" by Astrisoni

... my tastes lean sentimental and ose but I swear there's a lot of very funny filk out there too

"Never Set the Cat on Fire" by Frank Hayes (a famous one)

"Banned From Argo" by Leslie Fish (an INFAMOUS one)

"Don't Push That Button" by Duane Elms and Larry Warner

"No More SF Cons" by Juanita Coulson

"One More Ose Song" by B. J. Willinger

everything Bob Kanefsky writes

[astriiformes]

for the bandcamp post you rbed earlier, what were the cool music recs that you were mentioning in the tags? 👀

Been meaning to get to this ask for a bit and since today (12/2/22) is Bandcamp Friday (meaning all proceeds from purchases go directly to the artists!) I figured it was a perfect time to share recs!

Cheshire Moon are a really lovely filk duo (wonderful humans on top of making wonderful music) with several albums out. Highly recommend their stuff to people who like folklore and mythology, and I am a big fan of the electric violin that features heavily in many of their songs. Some of my favorite tracks of theirs include Banshee, Build Your Wings, and The Witch in Your Story

Run Boy Run are a folk/acoustic/americana group with some really phenomenal fiddle featured alongside their vocals. Some tracks of theirs I really like are Hoot Owl, Under the Boughs, their take on Waterbound, & Who Should Follow Who?

Derina Harvey Band are a Canadian Celtic rock group whose electric strings I also adore, they do cover of a lot of classic sea songs and folk music and I especially like their versions of Caledonia, The Mary Ellen Carter, The Last Saskatchewan Pirate, and Drunken Sailor

Vixy & Tony are a filk group with a REALLY incredible strings section who do a nice mix of some of their own songs and covers of some other classics (their version of Dawson's Christian remains my favorite I've heard, the cello on it alone is just incredible -- also, Dawson's Christian is the best, it's a classic filk space "ghost ship" story), I also quite like We Are Who We Are

Grace Petrie is a queer folk/protest singer whose stuff I have fallen a little bit in love with this year. Her music is often extremely political in the best way but also very, very heartfelt and I think it's my goal in life to be able to write parts like her fiddle player, Ben Moss. My very favorite song of hers is The Losing Side, which I have emotionally belted along to..... a lot this year, but I also highly recommend Northbound, We've Got an Office in Hackney, Storm to Weather, her version of Tom Paine's Bones, Farewell to Welfare, and last but not least by any measure, Black Tie (which is an ode to butch/gnc identity that also got me to cry the first time I heard it over on the transmasc side of things)

The Faithful Sidekicks are a rock filk group that leans equally sincere and comedy (and also are really lovely humans, who I got to hang out with a bit at DragonCon this year!). I know they have a fun new parody album out I have not listened to yet, but some of my favorites of theirs are I Built a Time Machine, Fatty Bolger, Spoons, Meetings, and Sancho Panza.

Beth Kinderman & the Player Characters are some friends of mine who also make really excellent, largely acoustic filk. Someday they will hopefully release their newest album which has some songs I'm dying to be able to buy, but in the meantime I also really like Supernatural Aid, Refusal of the Return (both off a whole concept album that's a feminist deconstruction of the Hero's Journey), The Dread Gazebo, and Across the Water, which is technically about Game of Thrones but honestly, as a non-GoT fan, also just slaps

And for a rapid-fire round of a few more favorite songs: try Ship of Stone by Leslie Fish, Home to Me by Devil and the Deep Blue Sea, Oops We Split the Party by Clearly Guilty, Everybody Hates Elves by Kari Maaren, Neil Armstrong by Cat Faber, Row On by Ninebarrow, Somebody Will by Sassafrass, and Cheshire Kitten by S.J. Tucker

Also, if I can be shameless for a moment at the end here, my filk duo, Astrisoni, has an EP and a rough apartment-recorded single up on our page. We're hoping to maybe get some more songs up next year, but for now there's at least a couple of things!

[nonlovesongoftheday]

Take My Sheep - Kari Maaren

Goddamn this game; Please, someone take my sheep.

An iconic ballad about a universal experience when playing Settlers of Cataan.

[shorteststory]

// BAGELS // a special guest story by Kari Maaren 

Kari Maaren is a writer, cartoonist, musician, and academic whose first novel, Weave a Circle Round, was published by Tor Books in 2017. She has a completed webcomic, West of Bathurst, and an active one, It Never Rains. She is fond of time travel.

[himluv]

SFWA Reading in Portland!

SFWA Reading in Portland!

Last night’s  reading was wonderful! I always have so much anxiety leading up to any sort of writing event that my brain convinces me that I will have a terrible time. Surely, I will embarrass myself beyond any hope of repair. I will somehow literally drool on someone. I will trip and/or fall, breaking something (inanimate or otherwise) and drawing every eye in the building. I will, once face to…

[emiett]

I just finished “Weave a Circle Round” by Kari Maaren (also known as “Your New Neighbors are Completely Normal Please Stop Listening to us from the Bushes”) and thoroughly enjoyed it! I had to doodle my favorite character, Josiah and of course Cuerva Lachance. Planning for more but we’ll see if time permits it! 

[the-dust-jacket]

Check out the nominees for this year’s Andre Norton Award! The full list of Nebula nominees is up here. 

[ladyherenya]

Books read in February

I continued on with three series I started in January, and read a few sequels to books/series I started last year. One book was co-written by an author I discovered in January, and the remaining three were by new-to-me authors. Yet again, nearly everything was fantasy and science-fiction. Clearly I was not being very adventurous...

(Longer reviews and ratings are on LibraryThing. And also my Dreamwidth blog.)

The Tethered Mage by Melissa Caruso:  Lady Amalia Cornaro is walking around incognito when she’s enlisted to tether a rogue fire-mage threatening to burn the city. I kept expecting this to be more consistently gripping. Amalia’s under a lot of pressure, trying to juggle conflicting loyalties, her choices constrained and scrutinised, yet she approaches things with an amount of calm confidence. It’s quite believable, given her strong sense of identity and relationship with her mother, but undercuts the urgency somewhat. Otherwise, this has memorable characters, satisfyingly-complex political intrigue and rich worldbuilding. I’m interested in seeing what happens next.

Discworld - City Watch books by Terry Pratchett:

Feet of Clay (narrated by Nigel Planer): The Watch investigate a couple of murders and the attempted-poisoning of Lord Vetinari.  Meanwhile, something’s going on with the golems. I’m impressed that people plotting to replace Vetinari with a king has been a recurring theme without becoming repetitive. But I really like how Pratchett writes detective/mystery stories - that’s partly why I’m finding these books so engaging. I also liked how the characters’ respective prejudices were challenged. A downside I often experience with audiobooks is that I can’t remember, or else easily look up, my favourite passages afterwards. This time I’ve had no trouble remembering.

Jingo (narrated by Nigel Planer): The first book to actually take the Watch beyond the city of Ankh-Morpork. An island rises from the sea and Ankh-Morpork prepares to go to war over it… with some difficulty, given a lack of army. I was somewhat less entertained by the middle section, which is not so much an investigation as a sea adventure -- I don’t think I laughed quite so often nor was as gripped by the story. However, all the bits with Vimes were great, and I was satisfied and delighted by the way the everything eventually twisted together.

Penric’s Fox, a novella in the World of the Five Gods by Lois McMaster Bujold (narrated by Grover Gardner): Set soon after Penric and the Shaman. It’s a self-contained story, so jumping from the later books back to this one works. Penric and his friends investigate the murder of a temple sorceress; Pen and Des are most concerned with finding the sorceress’ demon. I enjoyed this a lot, especially seeing Pen interact with another sorcerer and with the princess-archdivine. Some of their conversations hit unexpectedly serious and emotional notes.  I was hoping that further instalments would be set after the later books, but now I’m confident that whatever stories Bujold chooses to tell next will be interesting.

Shadowsong by S. Jae-Jones: The sequel to Wintersong is about things starting with the letter M: “Madness, mania, melancholy. Music, magic, memories.” I like the prose, setting and characters, and he way Liesl’s siblings and music are so important to her. I like that the story takes her struggles seriously and affirms that, even though she can be difficult and moody, she’s still loved. But I was not a fan of the way the plot unfolded. Some stories meander satisfyingly, but I just found it frustrating here. I’m disappointed... yet at the same time glad I made an effort to finish it?

Saga by Brian K. Vaughan and Fiona Staples:

Volume Three: I enjoyed this volume, with its themes about families. I liked the moments of rich characterisation, and the picture-book quality of the narration. There were dramatic twists too, and funny moments, and lovely moments, and heartbreaking ones (AHHH, STOP HURTING CHARACTERS I LIKE), and the sort of weirdness I know to expect. I’m still super invested in the characters - and still super worried something really awful will happen that will just ruin everything. I know I’ve come to the wrong story if I want everyone to be okay, but I just want everyone to be okay, okay?

Volume Four: This feels like the start of a second season. Alana, Marko and their daughter, now a toddler, are still in hiding but otherwise things are comparatively calm. Hazel’s narration ominously makes it clear that this stability is about to unravel. I don’t think what happens is objectively worse than anything in the previous volumes, but I found this volume more disquieting and less enjoyable. Were there fewer heart-warming and fewer funny moments, to balance out the everything else? Or is it just that my sense of dread, as I waited for everything to go wrong, colouring things?

The Books of the Raksura by Martha Wells:

Stories of the Raksura, volume one: This contains a couple of novellas and a couple of short stories. The longest, The Fallen World, is about Moon after The Siren Depths, and is exactly what I expect from Raksura stories: Moon is (understandably) emotional, Stone is supportive; they explore a place which is mysterious and vividly imaginative, and solve problems with teamwork. I love it. The other three stories are all prequels. I wasn’t expecting to like The Tale of Indigo and Cloud story so much. Cerise is level-headed and understanding, and it’s fascinating to get an insider’s view of a normal reigning queen and her court.

Stories of the Raksura, volume two:  This collection of stories veers more towards mysteries of a strange world than courtly intrigue. The Dead City is a prequel. Moon is not in a great place. From the subsequent books, I know that things do get better for him -- but not just yet -- which gives this story a rather melancholy vibe. The Dark Earth Below is set after The Siren Depths. Moon is anxiously anticipating a momentous - positive - development and investigates an issue concerning their neighbours.. I enjoyed the glimpses into life for the court. Also notable: one of the short stories, “Mimesis”, is from Jade’s perspective!

Weave a Circle Round by Kari Maaren: Freddy wants to fly under the radar but one of her weird neighbours is in all her classes. This reminded me of Diana Wynne Jones -- a similar blend of eccentric characters, magical shenanigans, mythology, commentary on storytelling, with a relatable portrayal of growing up and of difficult family dynamics. Yet it has its own style and its own narrative priorities, like thoughtful, matter-of-fact inclusion of disabilities, and exploring what it means to be “chosen” in this sort of fantasy. I was impressed with the way it has an epic scope yet remains tightly focused. Every detail counts. I loved it.

The Snow Sister by Emma Carroll (narrated by Victoria Fox): A short historical children’s novel. Pearl’s father receives news that he is a beneficiary of his brother’s will, and her mother sends her out to buy the ingredients for Christmas puddings. This shopping trip doesn’t go as expected.I borrowed this because I needed another audiobook and I like the narrator. It’s a sweet story, a touch heavier-handed in its message than I’d prefer, but it took off in directions I hadn’t predicted and kept my interest.

Binti: The Night Masquerade by Nnedi Okorafor: Sequel to Binti and Binti: Home. This took me by surprise in terms of what happened and how strongly I felt about it. Binti tries to save her family and avert a war. She also reaches an understanding of her identity. She hasn’t followed the path expected of a Himba girl; she’s left home and changed physically as well as personally; she has a bond to a Meduse and has learnt about her heritage from her father’s family. I liked how it pulled together the threads running through the trilogy and that, although it’s a story involving conflict and loss, there’s acceptance and joy.

Illuminae by Amie Kaufman and Jay Kristoff: An intense young-adult science-fiction thriller, told through messages, memos, interview transcriptions, reports describing surveillance footage, diagrams and other documents. It’s the most surprising and creative epistolary novel I’ve read. A remote mining outpost is attacked by a rival cooperation, and the spaceships of evacuees are pursued -- and they have other problems onboard. Two recently-broken-up teenagers work together to uncover secrets the ships’ captains are hiding. Their story is tense, occasionally funny, sometimes sad, with unexpected twists. I wondered if it would become too dark, but it didn’t. I was really impressed with the way everything fitted together.

A Little Taste of Poison by R.J. Anderson: Sequel to A Pocket Full of Murder. Isaveth is offered a scholarship to attend Tarreton College. She’s excited about studying magic but worried about fitting in, especially if her  classmates discover she’s a poor Moshite whose father was recently and infamously accused of murder. I enjoyed this, at first in a gentle sort of way and then -- as the stakes are raised -- with a greater sense of urgency. It continues the story from the first book while allowing Isaveth to explore new territory: magic school, and new friendships. I particularly liked how the story handled relationships between female characters.

[bookaddict24-7]

New Young Adult Novels Releasing Today! (November 28, 2017)

Have you added any of these books to your tbr? Have I missed any new releases? Let me know!

New Series/ Standalones: 

R.I.P. Eliza Hart by Alyssa Sheinmel

The Chaos of Standing Still by Jessica Brody

Fix Me by Lisa M. Cronkhite 

Ready to Fall by Marcella Pixley

Weave A Circle Round by Kari Maaren

Sequels: 

Final Fall (Lock & Mori #3) by Heather W. Petty

Happy reading!

[torteen]

There is a character we’ve all encountered in various works of fiction. She’s most noticeable in films, but she turns up in books too. She’s talented, intelligent, driven, and practised at skills that few ever master. Everyone who meets her is awed by her. Women want to be her. Men want to win her love. In a world defined by mediocrity, she shines. Weave a Circle Round author Kari Maaren thinks we very much need to get rid of her, preferably yesterday.

[taleweaver-ramblings]

4, 18, and 34 for the book asks?

4. What is your favourite book this year?

Well, I already mentioned the Queen's Thief series and The Werewolf of Whitechapel . . . Rhythm of War would probably be next on the list! 'Cause it was epic. Not my favorite book in the series, but still epic.

18. Recommend a book to the person who sent you this ask.

Hmm, hmm, hmm. Perhaps Weave a Circle Round by Kari Maaren? It was one of my favorites for the year it came out — strange, colorful people colliding with a family that's extraordinary in a more ordinary way, time travel, loads of mythology and literary references, and random little bits that prove significant in the end. It's slower-paced than the average modern read, but I really liked that, and I think you'd appreciate it too.

34. Your favourite poetry collection? A specific poem that you love?

I confess that I read very little poetry. That said, a friend of mine did a sort of experiment for some time in which she wrote a poem a day on the back of bus tickets, and she collated the best of those into a series of color-coded collections collectively entitled "Ticket to Write." (More info and handy download links here, because she pulled them off Amazon.) My favorite of said collections would be whichever one contains "Before the Sun Rises," which captures quite beautifully the things which can make getting up and going out before the sun worth it.

[imissthembutitwasntadisaster]

so! i just had this crazy brainwave! have you read the webcomic West of Bathurst by Kari Maaren because if not i think its chaotic academia vibe would be fun (don't worry, the main character is plenty traumatized but it's a slow burn and there's lots of chaos. so much chaos. her roommate teaches undergrad english and suspects the MC's chaotically-casual-genius crush of being satan in disguise. things randomly catch on fire. there are all the nerdy allusions. also 'murder'tag.) idr the address but google is your friend if that sounds interesting. it's also very bingeable.

I haven't read it but it sounds really fun, I'll have to check it out.

(And you know I don't mind MCs who aren't traumatised, right? trauma is not a requirement XD)

[astriiformes]

I was tagged by @tam--lin in this hyperspecific tumblr-corner niche tag meme (which is delightful, honestly), so here’s my answers:

What sort of music were you into circa age 12?

Tragically, at the age of twelve I had not yet developed a taste in music, because all I was ever exposed to was the excruciatingly bland contemporary Christian station that was the only music my mother ever had on in the car and one (1) classic rock road trip playlist my dad, who does have an interesting taste in music but who never controlled the radio, created back when he was in college and still had the cassettes for. 

That said, of the classic rock road trip songs, I was most excited about the songs Magic Power by Triumph and Carry on Wayward Son by Kansas, and I particularly stand by the latter as a jam

Favorite fantasy or sci-fi thing media released in the last 5 years:

Last five years I might have to go with the Aerois campaign of the D&D stream High Rollers. I have assorted Critical Role feelings as well (although technically they started their first stream pre-2015 anyways) but I think Aerois might edge it out for me, personally

Favorite pair of boots:

So Groovebags doesn’t sell the exact model I own anymore (they’ve lasted me coming up on two years, which is a testament to them not exclusively being a fashion statement), but I have a variation on this style of boots that displays the subducting plate boundary a little more prominently that I bought on a big sale when I was in need of some good waterproof shoes. They’ve been worth every penny, especially since starting work at the science museum where having a pair of Ms. Frizzle-esque boots just adds to my science educator cred. I absolutely plan on replacing them with another equally ostentatious science design from them (they have SO MANY) when the plate boundary ones die, especially since they do unisex sizing which I, a transmasc person with very small feet, appreciate deeply

Song you blare loudly, windows-down, that confuses fellow drivers:

Officially, I don’t think I’ve ever done this, but emotionally it’s probably “Everybody Hates Elves” by Kari Maaren

A thing you don’t understand about US dating culture:

I don’t even know if I can pick one thing, I can conceptualize romance so poorly that I can barely even wrap my mind around the idea that people go on dates and that it’s at all different than just hanging out with something, much less zero in on some of the other things that confuse me.

Vests, y/n:

I have been living the vest appreciation life ever since my junior year of high school and I don’t intend to stop. In this household, we look like Marty McFly or bust.

Underrated musical artist you think we should listen to:

I Fight Dragons! I rarely hear people talk about them (other than people who I know I got into them) but they’ve been one of my favorite bands also since my junior year of high school and I’m just as into their new stuff as I was their discography then

You have to give up one forever: oceans or mountains. (Personally. You do not affect the world in any way.)

This choice hurts me but I know in my soul I gotta say oceans. The Rockies in particular stole my heart and haven’t let go. Moving away from Colorado to someplace flatter has been the first time I’ve really understood longing for another landscape.

Unpopular food opinion:

Black licorice is delicious and you’re all cowards. And I don’t just mean the normal kind, which I do love, but also the extra powerful salmiak stuff

Favorite museum:

I have a huge soft spot for the Denver Museum of Nature and Science and the little zoological and paleontological museums at the university I went to in Montana because I volunteered in collections at all of them. DMNS in particular was when I was in high school, so it was pretty formative (and it’s also just a great museum!)

I also love OMSI, in Oregon, which my grandpa would take me and my sister to every time we visited, and the AMNH in New York which I snuck down to several times while spending my freshman year at NYU. And the one bright spot in the disastrous abroad trip to Florence that semester was seeing the Museo Galileo, which is not one of the big names on the block but if you’ve ever wanted to see actual Renaissance-era scientific instruments or uhhhhhhh [throws dart at wall] Galileo’s mummified finger (no, really) it’s your place

Also, different kind of museum, but can I say the Doctor Who Experience in Cardiff? I loved the Doctor Who Experience, and Cardiff

How many swords have you owned in your life:

Tragically the only fencing gear I’ve ever used was rented, although I did get to at least live the aesthetic of having a ton of them lying around the apartment I shared with the college fencing club captain in Montana. Other than that, the little foam sword I used for elementary school Shakespeare performances as Hamlet and MacDuff is all I’ve got for you, unless my fancy combat-grade Ultrasaber counts since someday when things exist again I’m going to use it in the local Saber Guild (lightsaber stage combat!) chapter

Most obscure word you know in a foreign language you don’t speak:

The tricky thing here is the definition of “don’t speak” because dabbling in language learning is sort of my thing (in phases, at least). I don’t have much fluency in anything other than English though, so even though it’s the language I’ve been studying most seriously as of late my pick has to be “iùl-oidche,” which is a poetic name for a navigational star in Gaelic

Dream cosplay(s):

This is...... a very long list. 

I’m technically actively working on Quill from High Rollers already but that one involves so much wild technical expertise that it still feels out there. Same for the fact that I’ve already done Percy de Rolo (from Critical Role) once, but the  entirely-reworked version of it I actually want to pull off when I have better sewing skills and more money counts as a dream cosplay.

Other than that.... every single OT Luke Skywalker, but especially his X-Wing pilot outfit and his throne room one with the yellow jacket (and also Hoth, because I live in Minnesota and it would be funny), as well as Legolas, Fjord from Critical Role, and Milo Thatch from A:tLE

(In true cosplayer fashion. Too many things)

Would you shoot a man to save public libraries, y/n:

.....it goes very against my character but like. If I gave the man an impassioned, Luke Skywalker-style speech about what he should do to save them and he didn’t use his powers for good. All bets are off.

[elsewhereuniversity]

Weave a Circle Round by kari Maaren, Cold Summer by Gwen Cole, and the Beanstalk trilogy by E. Jade Lomax all have Elsewher U vibes

I love E Jade Lomax! It’s more fair to say that I picked up some Beanstalk vibes, tbh. I’ll definitely have to check out the others!

[gehayi]

Our literary magazine is looking for submissions. We hope you will consider sending us a story, though Before you do, please notice that we have a few conditions It is important that you know. I've heard that you are fond of spaceships and of conversations Between old ghosts and children set on futuristic Mars. These do not fit our guidelines, which have served as the foundations For how we choose our writing stars. We want your CanLit. (CANLIT!) Meaningful and gritty. Give us CanLit. (CANLIT!) Because ennui is witty. Postmodern or historical, with lots of metaphorical And patly categorical bad weather that will fit Into your CanLit. (CANLIT!) Fulfilling expectations, that is CanLit. (CANLIT!) With a smidgeon of First Nations. We don't want your unrealistic shit. Just fill us up with good CanLit. (CANLIT!) We're running out of stories of Alberta and of farming Set around the Great Depression; those are never stale. A bored housewife protagonist will be completely charming As long as you yourself are male. Stick in outdated gender norms and social indiscretion And blizzards that are metaphors, and one important pie Embodying the housewife's clearly blameworthy repression. And also, someone's got to die. We want your CanLit. (CANLIT!) Meaningful and gritty. Give us CanLit. (CANLIT!) Because ennui is witty. Postmodern or historical, with lots of metaphorical And patly categorical bad weather that will fit Into your CanLit. (CANLIT!) Fulfilling expectations, that is CanLit. (CANLIT!) With a smidgeon of First Nations. We don't want your unrealistic shit. Just fill us up with good CanLit. (CANLIT!) For Gothic in Ontario, Don't go and make it scary; oh, No: Gothic in Ontario Should just be kind of twee. If you were born in Newfoundland Just write of unemployment and A broken hero, bent and tanned, Who broods upon the quay. Magic realism's okay If you're from B.C. You want awards and funding, so don't make your story happy, And if it fits a genre, you will find you're out of luck Unless you're Margaret Atwood, and you're not, so take your crappy Formula away; you suck. Perhaps our categories may appear a bit restrictive, But we know what sort of fiction makes this country great. Your otherworldly fantasy may read as quite addictive, But can the average scholarly Toronto WASP relate? We want your CanLit. (CANLIT!) Meaningful and gritty. Give us CanLit. (CANLIT!) Because ennui is witty. Postmodern or historical, with lots of metaphorical And patly categorical bad weather that will fit Into your CanLit. (CANLIT!) Fulfilling expectations, that is CanLit. (CANLIT!) With a smidgeon of First Nations. We don't want your unrealistic shit. Just fill us up with good CanLit. (CANLIT!) We want your CanLit. (CANLIT!) Meaningful and gritty. Give us CanLit. (CANLIT!) Because ennui is witty. Postmodern or historical, with lots of metaphorical And patly categorical bad weather that will fit Into your CanLit. (CANLIT!) Fulfilling expectations, that is CanLit. (CANLIT!) With a smidgeon of First Nations. We don't want your unrealistic shit. Just fill us up with good CanLit. (CANLIT!) Just fill us up with good Can— Barely understood Can— Fill us up with good CanLit!

Written and performed by Kari Maaren.