#Kaaras and crossdressing

[kaaras-adaar]

Kaaras + Lingerie/Crossdressing

// I wanted to go more in depth about Kaaras and cross dressing in the bedroom. I had a big post about Kaaras and lingerie specific, but I can no longer find it.  First of all, that’s what I want to make clear: this is not something Kaaras does outside of the bedroom, this isn’t something that Kaaras does on a daily basis, it IS a sexual thing. It is something that causes and stirs sexual arousal out of him, not something that he would do on a day to day basis.

Under a cut for obvious reasons.

Cross dressing for Kaaras has nothing to do with identity. He is a cis male. Whilst he’s exceptionally open minded about those who are not cis, Kaaras does consider himself a male and identifies as a man, but he is also very aware of his femininity and need to feel soft. He’s comfortable with his masculinity, and if people were to insult him and call him a “girl” in some kind derogatory way, he’d not be offended. Kaaras believes women are equal to men and should be seen as such. He grew up with women, knows that they can be strong willed and physically strong and adept as well. He does not see softness as “only feminine” nor does he see hardness as “only masculine”. He believes people are PEOPLE, and all that gender stereotype bullshit is exactly that: bullshit. It’s not important to him and he doesn’t really care to think about it (except for equality of course).

However, you do also have to remember that Kaaras grew up around certain ideas and ideals. Even as a sheltered individual, he was subject to Fereldan culture and human customs. That does include certain dress codes.

There’s a vague line between this, because in medieval periods (such as Thedas), things like robes, peasant clothes, frocks and tunics are pretty unisex. This is why it doesn’t really extend to things like that. Kaaras grew up wearing peasant clothes, which were generally a dress. One long item of clothing tied off at the waist (I also have a post about KILT WEARING, too, but I’m not going to go into that here).

Kaaras’ cross dressing is lingerie/undergarment specific. These are clothes that are exclusive to women in a general understanding. These are items specifically labelled for women, because they are shaped for their bodies (underwear, stockings, bras, corsets etc). The idea is to show femininity, to capture it and make one feel, well… ultimately sexy.  

This was something Kaaras found out at a young age. When his father died, he was the only male of the household, between his mother, his adopted younger sister and his mentor. This was an exceptionally difficult time for Kaaras because he was just blooming into his teenage years (his father died when he was 12). It means Kaaras had a really difficult time coming to terms with his body, because he felt different from the women around him. He felt like they wouldn’t understand him, and ultimately, this was when Kaaras began to close himself off to his mother a lot. He began to feel uncomfortable and insecure about himself because he didn’t have any male influence anymore. He already lacked in friends because of him being a qunari, so he really didn’t have anyone to help him discover himself until a later age (that’ll be left for a different post that will go into Kaaras and his alcoholism).

Like a lot of curious children, it did mean Kaaras would sneak into his parent’s room to rummage through the cliches of makeup and underwear. That’s pretty much how Kaaras found out he enjoyed wearing womens clothes. It was innocent enough at first, of course, he was young and not really sexually matured. But it was the foundation of where this ‘kink’ came from.

As an older teenager, Kaaras began to realise that this stirred sexual arousal in him. Especially when he was involved with female lovers for the night. Being drunk gave him the confidence to fool around more, to explore and discover himself without being embarrassed about it. Most of Kaaras’ sexual experience is, unfortunately, based off many drunk nights–until his past lover. That was when Kaaras REALLY got to explore and discover himself.

Kaaras is a complicated personal when it comes to much about him. He’s simple and yet not in many ways. His sexuality is a long, long road of self discovery, pain and chaos, and that’s not all due to the fact that he suffers PGAD (PSAS). There are a lot of contributing factors that one may never think about when they see Kaaras as the man he has grown to become now.

Wearing women’s clothes became something of a dirty little secret that he has been very ashamed to speak about and express, because he had in his head the idea that it is not ‘normal’ for him to enjoy it. Kaaras is a hypocrite in the fact that he is so open and willing to accept OTHERS but never HIMSELF, because he’s grown up with so much self hatred and such a NEGATIVE image of himself, so these are all things that make him feel even worse about himself in the eye of the public.

But lingerie, dressing in women’s underthings, makes him feel gracious, makes him have this idea of soft, makes femininity that he can finally see and feel in himself that no one else can and/or will. This isn’t something he will open up about to just anyone, this is something that he will only expose to someone he trusts will accept him (and even then, he has a lot of fear and shame in the whole thing). This also doesn’t mean Kaaras doesn’t think men can be feminine and beautiful, he does, remember, he just has a lot of internal hate towards himself, and being told that he is an ugly savage oxman all his life doesn’t help with his image issues. Kaaras is a very insecure person, crippling so at times. But his clothes? They speak for him. And that doesn’t just mean the lingerie in the bedroom, but clothes in general help Kaaras EXPRESS himself. They always have. They make him feel stronger, they make him feel professional when needed, they make him feel practical. He often does not make his suffering known, or even his happiness at times, but his clothes are a form of expression for him, which is one of the reasons why he very much agrees with Vivienne that they should LOOK the part if people wish to take them seriously, despite him being a commoner.

Lastly, I should mention while Kaaras certainly enjoys others wearing lingerie in the bedroom, this kink may never involve them. This is something he does for himself, and does not need or require someone else to be involved. If your muse is willing, then that’s certainly great! He would love to be able to express himself and feel sensual in the bedroom with his lover, it’s a real bonus to have that support and care, but Kaaras also is very used to the fact that this is a solo act. Something he enjoys doing in the comfort of his own self.

At the end of the day, this is not something easy for Kaaras. This is something that’s come from a background of confusion, self hate and being sheltered. Even if Kaaras has an exceptionally supportive family, Kaaras struggled to express himself and open up once his father died, shutting his mother out of a lot of his life. His sister only knows by accident, and his mother has only suspected, but does not push her son to speak what he is not comfortable with. When/if she finds out, she would be willing to make Kaaras the most beautiful crossdresser because she’s so supportive of her children.

[kaaras-adaar-a]

Kaaras + Lingerie/Crossdressing

// I wanted to go more in depth about Kaaras and cross dressing in the bedroom. I had a big post about Kaaras and lingerie specific, but I can no longer find it.  First of all, that’s what I want to make clear: this is not something Kaaras does outside of the bedroom, this isn’t something that Kaaras does on a daily basis, it IS a sexual thing. It is something that causes and stirs sexual arousal out of him, not something that he would do on a day to day basis. 

Under a cut for obvious reasons. 

Cross dressing for Kaaras has nothing to do with identity. He is a cis male. Whilst he’s exceptionally open minded about those who are not cis, Kaaras does consider himself a male and identifies as a man, but he is also very aware of his femininity and need to feel soft. He’s comfortable with his masculinity, and if people were to insult him and call him a “girl” in some kind derogatory way, he’d not be offended. Kaaras believes women are equal to men and should be seen as such. He grew up with women, knows that they can be strong willed and physically strong and adept as well. He does not see softness as “only feminine” nor does he see hardness as “only masculine”. He believes people are PEOPLE, and all that gender stereotype bullshit is exactly that: bullshit. It’s not important to him and he doesn’t really care to think about it (except for equality of course).

However, you do also have to remember that Kaaras grew up around certain ideas and ideals. Even as a sheltered individual, he was subject to Fereldan culture and human customs. That does include certain dress codes.

There’s a vague line between this, because in medieval periods (such as Thedas), things like robes, peasant clothes, frocks and tunics are pretty unisex. This is why it doesn’t really extend to things like that. Kaaras grew up wearing peasant clothes, which were generally a dress. One long item of clothing tied off at the waist (I also have a post about kilt wearing, too, but I’m not going to go into that here). 

Kaaras’ cross dressing is lingerie/undergarment specific. These are clothes that are exclusive to women in a general understanding. These are items specifically labelled for women, because they are shaped for their bodies (underwear, stockings, bras, corsets etc). The idea is to show femininity, to capture it and make one feel, well... ultimately sexy.  

This was something Kaaras found out at a young age. When his father died, he was the only male of the household, between his mother, his adopted younger sister and his mentor. This was an exceptionally difficult time for Kaaras because he was just blooming into his teenage years (his father died when he was 12). It means Kaaras had a really difficult time coming to terms with his body, because he felt different from the women around him. He felt like they wouldn’t understand him, and ultimately, this was when Kaaras began to close himself off to his mother a lot. He began to feel uncomfortable and insecure about himself because he didn’t have any male influence anymore. He already lacked in friends because of him being a qunari, so he really didn’t have anyone to help him discover himself until a later age (that’ll be left for a different post that will go into Kaaras and his alcoholism). 

Like a lot of curious children, it did mean Kaaras would sneak into his parent’s room to rummage through the cliches of makeup and underwear. That’s pretty much how Kaaras found out he enjoyed wearing womens clothes. It was innocent enough at first, of course, he was young and not really sexually matured. But it was the foundation of where this ‘kink’ came from. 

As an older teenager, Kaaras began to realise that this stirred sexual arousal in him. Especially when he was involved with female lovers for the night. Being drunk gave him the confidence to fool around more, to explore and discover himself without being embarrassed about it. Most of Kaaras’ sexual experience, is, unfortunately, based off many drunk nights--until his past lover. That was when Kaaras REALLY got to explore and discover himself. 

Kaaras is a complicated personal when it comes to much about him. He’s simple and yet not in many ways. His sexuality is a long, long road of self discovery, pain and chaos, and that’s not all due to the fact that he suffers PGAD (PSAS). There are a lot of contributing factors that one may never think about when they see Kaaras as the man he has grown to become now.

Wearing women’s clothes became something of a dirty little secret that he has been very ashamed to speak about and express, because he had in his head the idea that it is not ‘normal’ for him to enjoy it. Kaaras is a hypocrite in the fact that he is so open and willing to accept OTHERS but never HIMSELF, because he’s grown up with so much self hatred and such a NEGATIVE image of himself, so these are all things that make him feel even worse about himself in the eye of the public.

But lingerie, dressing in women’s underthings, makes him feel gracious, makes him have this idea of soft, makes femininity that he can finally see and feel in himself that no one else can and/or will. This isn’t something he will open up about to just anyone, this is something that he will only expose to someone he trusts will accept him (and even then, he has a lot of fear and shame in the whole thing). This also doesn’t mean Kaaras doesn’t think men can be feminine and beautiful, he does, remember, he just has a lot of internal hate towards himself, and being told that he is an ugly savage oxman all his life doesn’t help with his image issues. Kaaras is a very insecure person, crippling so at times. But his clothes? They speak for him. And that doesn’t just mean the lingerie in the bedroom, but clothes in general help Kaaras EXPRESS himself. They always have. They make him feel stronger, they make him feel professional when needed, they make him feel practical. He often does not make his suffering known, or even his happiness at times, but his clothes are a form of expression for him, which is one of the reasons why he very much agrees with Vivienne that they should LOOK the part if people wish to take them seriously, despite him being a commoner. 

Lastly, I should mention while Kaaras certainly enjoys others wearing lingerie in the bedroom, this kink may never involve them. This is something he does for himself, and does not need or require someone else to be involved. If your muse is willing, then that’s certainly great! He would love to be able to express himself and feel sensual in the bedroom with his lover, it’s a real bonus to have that support and care, but Kaaras also is very used to the fact that this is a solo act. Something he enjoys doing in the comfort of his own self.

At the end of the day, this is not something easy for Kaaras. This is something that’s come from a background of confusion, self hate and being sheltered. Even if Kaaras has an exceptionally supportive family, Kaaras struggled to express himself and open up once his father died, shutting his mother out of a lot of his life. His sister only knows by accident, and his mother has only suspected, but does not push her son to speak what he is not comfortable with. When/if she finds out, she would be willing to make Kaaras the most beautiful crossdresser because she’s so supportive of her children.