#Joel edmundson x reader

[pucksnsticksnhockeyboys]

let’s fall in love for the night

prompt: Let’s Fall In Love For The Night by FINNEAS

summary: you can't seem to stay away from Joel, no matter how bad you want more than what he’s willing to give you.

warnings: a bit of steaminess, mentions of sex and drinking, swearing

word count: 3.5k

Let's fall in love for the night And forget in the mornin'

You knew it was a dangerous game you were playing, toeing the line between friends with benefits and something more. You thought you weren’t ready for the more after your last relationship, but with Joel, the benefits were just too good to pass up.

So, you found yourself waiting for the standard ‘you up?’ text from Joel, the one that you knew would be coming shortly. Carolina had finished their home game a few hours earlier, and you knew Joel wanted to go out to celebrate with the boys. You weren't surprised when the text came just after midnight, but you did feel like kicking yourself a bit for being so willing to jump at the chance to see him.

He was waiting at the door by the time you arrived at his apartment, and you knew this because your fist barely had time to connect with the wooden door to knock before it swung open and he stood before you.

No matter how many times you saw him, his blinding smile always seemed to make your breath catch in your throat. A lazy smirk found home on his face as he towered over you, one arm wrapping around your waist to tug you close to him and the other shut the door as soon as you were far enough in the apartment. You could smell the alcohol on him, his lips dangerously close to your face. His hands fell heavy on your hips, crowding you close to the door.

“You aren’t even going to say hi?” You said quietly, trying to regain some of your composure, to act like he didn’t have such an effect on you as he did. His smug grin softened a bit, and that somehow made your stomach twist even more.

“Hi.” He cheekily said, as if he didn't have you pinned to his front door, the length of his body pressed against yours. You let out a breathy laugh, locking your hands together on the base of his neck behind his head.

Your simple positional movement seemed to remind him of why you were in his apartment, because he closed the small gap between you and caught your lips in a searing kiss. He wasted no time in deepening it, letting you know just what he wanted from you. And you were more than willing to give to him.

“God, you’re amazing.” Joel muttered against your lips, pulling you up to wrap your legs around his waist so he could carry you to his room.

And with praises like that spilling past his lips, you had a hard time remembering that by morning light you’d go back to being just another one of his friends.

Play me a song that you like You can bet I'll know every line

“You’re such a dork.” You teased, tossing a piece of popcorn from the bowl resting in your lap at the man sitting on the opposite side of the couch. Joel had invited you over for a movie night, and though you expected it to devolve to something along the lines of Netflix and chill than a friendly hang out, you enjoyed the quiet company. You sat with your back against the armrest, legs spread down the couch. Joel had pulled your legs across his lap, large hands resting on your shins.

“You love it.” Joel teased, completely ignoring the movie and instead staring straight at you. Ignoring the way your heart flipped in your chest, you simply shook your head and turned your gaze away from him. It was becoming harder and harder for you to tell yourself that things were just strictly platonic—with the occasional booty call, but still.

“You wish, Edmundson.” You teased, deciding that it was the easy way out. Joel didn’t respond right away, just squeezed your legs where they rested across his lap. You could feel his gaze on your face, but kept looking ahead at the television, even if you weren't actually paying attention to the movie.

“Can we dance? Let’s dance.” Joel stated, gently moving your legs off of his lap so he could stand. You shot him a confused look, but nonetheless took his extended hand and let him pull you to your feet. He used more forced than necessary, sending you flying into his chest so he hold you there. From the self-satisfied grin on his face, you could tell he did it on purpose. “C’mon, you can pick the song.”

And there really was no way you could say no that, especially when he was looking at you like you were the reason the sun rose in the morning. You nodded, and he cheered, moving through his apartment to set up the bluetooth speaker, mutter that if this was happening, ‘it was happening the right way’ and though you weren’t sure what he meant by that, you simply chuckled and paused the movie.

“A promise is a promise.” Joel joked, handing you his phone to pull up a song. You immediately went to Spotify, searching up the song that’s been stuck in your head for the past few days. You were slightly surprised to see that it was already downloaded, meaning that he listened to the song too. It was a fairly unknown song, and it honestly didn't even seem like on Joel would like. “Oh, that’s a good one.”

You grinned at this, pressing play on the upbeat song and immediately it started playing through the speakers in the apartment. Joel slipped his phone from your hands, locking it and tossing it onto the couch without ever taking his eyes off of you. His hands wrapped around yours, using them to spin you around and pull you into his chest, pressing kisses to your lips every once in a while that had your mind going fuzzy.

And as the two of you danced like idiots in love, you had a hard time remembering that by morning light you’d go back to being just another one of his friends.

I'm the boy that your boy hoped that you would avoid Don't waste your eyes on jealous guys, fuck that noise I know better than to call you mine

“Are you fucking kidding me.” The sentence fell past your lips without permission, and it certainly wasn't a question. You just couldn't seem to shake the jerk that walked into the bar, the one you blamed for launching you into the back and forth game you played with Joel.

The tall brunette sitting next you had been in conversation with his teammate Ryan Dzingel, who sat opposite him in the booth at the hole-in-the wall bar a group of you were in, when he heard your exclamation. Both boys stopped talking, following your gaze to the bar counter where your ex stood, a new girl tucked under his arm.

“Is that—” Ryan started, but Joel cut him off before he could finish, the arm he had wrapped around your waist tightening.

“Yeah, it is.” He confirmed, and you couldn't tear your gaze from him. Really, you couldn’t remember what exactly his appeal had been. He controlled what you wore, who you hung out, and was generally a possessive asshole.

When he need things with you, you had sworn off relationships. Joel had been your shoulder to cry on, and one thing led to another and suddenly you’re in a friends with benefits dynamic that was slowly driving you insane.

“What do you think he’s going to do when he sees we’re here together?” There was a hint of smugness in Joel’s voice, one that you couldn't help but roll your eyes at. Throughout the entirety of your relationship with your ex, he had told you he didn't want you hanging out with Joel, because according to him, the hockey player had a thing for you. Nothing had happened between you and Joel, while you were dating, at least.

You knew he would hate it if he found out he actually drove you into Joel’s arms—and bed.

“I really don’t care.” You huffed. You were done letting him dictate your life, and couldn’t care less if his feelings got hurt because you were out with someone he had been jealous.

“That’s right. Fuck him.” Joel tipped the remains of his drink back and downed the rest of it, causing you to shoot Ryan a look. He was just as confused as you were about Joel’s odd behavior. Usually, the tall brunette could keep a cool head, but seemingly the sight of your ex had him on edge. “You’re too good for him, anyways.”

Joel slide out of the booth, tugging you with him and towards the bar to presumably get a refill. 

“Let’s go show him what he’s missing out on.”

And as he kept his hand entwined with yours for the rest of the night, you had a hard time remembering that by morning light you’d go back to being just another one of his friends.

You need a pick-me-up? I'll be there in twenty-five I like to push my luck So take my hand, let's take a drive I've been livin' in the future Hopin' I might see you sooner I want you ridin' shotgun I knew when I got one right

There was no good way to put it other than you day just simply sucked. From the moment you woke up—late, considering your alarm didn’t go off—to messing up some important paperwork at work. 

The cherry on top had been when you burnt the dinner you had been cooking, ending up with you close to tears caused from stress, curled up on the couch. Your thumb hovered over his contact, unsure whether or not to call. Sucking in a breath to steady your nerves, you dialed his number. 

“Hello?” He answered on the second ring, and just hearing his voice calmed you down. When you didn't respond right away, he called you name, and you heard him shifting through the line. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine.” You hurried to assure him, but he caught on to the tightness of your voice. It was one of the rare times you hated how well he knew you. 

“No, you’re not.” He said with a light chuckle, though there was a hint of worry in his own tone. In the background, you heard what suspiciously sounded like keys jingling. “I’ll be there soon, we can go for a drive.” 

And he didn't sound like he was asking, not that you would have turned him down. He hung up shortly after you agreed, and you were left sitting on your couch wondering just when your hookups turned to comforting each other after hard days. You and Joel had been friends before adding benefits to your relationship, but never had you called him late at night to try and find some calmness in a stressful day.

True to his word, it wasn't long before he texted you saying he was out front, and to meet him. When you exited your apartment building, he was leaning against the side of his car, waiting for you. The moment his gaze settled on you, he opened his arms wide and you wasted no time in pressing into his chest. 

He just smiled softly at you as he opened the passenger door for you after you pulled away. He gave you control of the music, and as he drove through the night a comfortable silence fell over the two of you. 

“Where are we going?” You asked after a moment, keeping your voice quiet as you were afraid to break the bubble that had formed between the two of you in the car. 

“I dunno.” Joel shrugged, stopping at a red light. He turned in his seat to look over at you, and suddenly it felt like you were the only two people in the whole city. He reached across the center console, cupping your jaw softly and tracing the curve of your lip with his thumb. Your breath caught in your throat at the tenderness of the action. Joel had kissed you hundreds of times before, but somehow deep in your gut you knew that if pressed his lips to yours the dynamic of your relationship would change, especially with the way he was looking at you. 

All too soon the light turned green again and he dropped your face. But instead of retuning his hand to the steering wheel where it had been previously placed, he brushed down your arm to thread his fingers with yours. 

“Let’s just get away for a while.”

And really, there was no way you could say to that.

Let's fall in love for the night And forget in the mornin'

Ever since the night where Joel had picked you up and just driven you around for an hour, the two of you had become closer. Now, not every text he sent you was an invitation to come over and hookup. Sometimes he wanted to talk on the phone to unwind from a stressful day or a bad game, and sometimes he wanted you to come over, but only simply because he liked having someone next to him as he fell asleep. 

Tonight was like the latter. He had asked you during your lunch break if you wanted to spend the night, and it didn't take much convincing for you to agree. It scared you, a little bit, just how easy it was for him to make you want a relationship. You had been the one, after all, you decided the whole ‘no labels’ thing when you started hooking up. And now that you were ready for something more, you were scared he’d leave you. He didn't sign up for a relationship, but it felt like you were blurring the lines between friends with benefits and just what you had been trying to avoid in the first place. 

But then he opened the apartment door, looking so comfortable in a pair of grey sweats and your favorite hoodie of his, and all thoughts left your mind. You couldn't focus on anything besides how devastatingly handsome he looked smiling widely at you. 

He was going to be the death of you.

I love it when you talk that nerdy shit We're in our twenties talking thirties shit We're making money but we're saving it 'Cause talking shit is cheap and we talk a lot of it

Sometimes it was really hard to tell yourself that Joel saw you as nothing more than a casual hookup, one that was a built in friend when the morning light peaked through the window. 

Like right now, when you’re curled up against his bare chest, skin on skin and his fingers threaded in your hair, scratching at your scalp absentmindedly. You were so content, and the thought of ever having to get up made you curl into him tighter. 

“Do you ever think about the future?” Joel questioned, breaking the stillness of the room. Your heart momentarily skipped a beat in your chest, wondering just where this line of thinking came from. 

“I mean, yeah? Why?” You were treading lightly, hoping the maybe this was going in the direction you wanted it to. That maybe he would offer taking your relationship to the next level. Instead, you felt him shrug under your touch. 

“Just, my mom said something to me the other day about settling down.” He contemplated, and you worried that maybe he could feel your heart pounding against your chest from where it was pressed against him.

“Yeah?”

“But I don't know if I’m ready to do that yet.” You tried not to get your hopes up, you really did, you would could feel yourself physically deflate as you took in his words. 

“Oh. Yeah, me too.” You found yourself saying. Because really, how were you supposed to tell the guy you’re pretty sure you’re falling for that you saw your future with him? No matter how uncertain your relationship with him seemed to be, ten years down the rode you couldn't imagine spending your days with anyone other than Joel.

So for now, you would settle for nights like this, storing the memory for another day when you needed to smile. 

You won't stay with me, I know But you can have your way with me 'til you go And if all your kisses turn into bruises, I'm a warnin'

You tried to take your mind off of it, really. How in the morning, Joel would slip out of bed before you and head off to his apartment. Sometimes after you and him hooked up, he’d stay, and he’d been staying more and more often in the recent weeks. 

But he had an early flight. A week-long road trip on the west coast, starting with the LA Kings. You were glad he was leaving, hoping that maybe the break from him would give you time to get over Joel. 

But now, you weren’t focused on getting over him. In fact it was quite the opposite, you were straddling his lap, trying to get him as close to you as possible. Your hands were threaded in his hair, desperately trying to get a grip. His large hands were splayed across your back, pulling you impossibly closer as you arched into him. 

It was obscene, how easy it was for him to have you ready to go for him. He had barely touched you, but the idea of stopping was seemingly the worse thought in the world at the moment. 

“Always so good for me, baby.” He breathed in the short time it took for him to move his lips to your neck and it had you tilting your head back to give him more access. 

“How do you want me?” You all but moaned as he sucked marks into the skin of your neck. At your words, he felt you groan against you, the vibrations rattling through your whole body.

“What’d I do to deserve this?” He muttered, his hands securing themselves under your thighs as he stood to carry you back to your bedroom. You simply shrugged, not sure how to explain that this very well may be the last night you spent together. Maybe you were fighting a losing battle by trying to get over him, but you at least had to try. For your own sanity, you had to try to make this the last time you saw him.

“Consider it a going away present.” 

I know better than to ever call you mine

Joel had been gone a few days, and in that short amount of time you had tried to limit contact with him. You didn't really know how big a role he played in your life, until you found yourself closing out of the messages app when you wanted to send him an update about how your day went. 

Of course, you couldn’t shake him that easily. It was late at night, late for you at least. From the time zone he was in, it probably was a reasonable hour when he called you. 

At first, you had let it go to voicemail. You hadn't been sleeping, but you knew you really wouldn't be able to go to bed if you talked to him. But then he texted you, asking you to call him and that’s when your resolve broke. You knew nothing was probably wrong, and he was probably just bored, but that didn't stop the way your heart raced as you dialed his number. He picked up on the first ring, telling you he had been waiting for you. 

“Hey, what's up?” He spoke into the phone, a lightness to his voice that had you rolling onto your back and smiling like a fool in the dark.

“Joel, you called me.” You reminded him, and there was a breathy chuckle on the other side of the line that you missed hearing. It had only been a few days since you had seen him last and you already missed his laugh. “It’s late, here.”

“Sorry, just wanted to talk to you.”

And there it was. He said things like this and kissed you the way he did, but told you that he didn't want labels. He didn't want the one thing you had been yearning for as of late. But no matter how many times you told yourself that you were done—you knew you’d always come back to him. No amount of distance between you and him could be enough to change how you felt. You just couldn’t give him up.

“I miss you.” Joel sighed, the sound so lonely it made your chest seize. You pulled the comforter up to your chin, snuggling deeper into the bed and pretending that he was with you. That the sound of his even breathing coming through the line was really coming from the pillow next to you. 

You wanted him, selfishly, you wanted all of him. But if you had to, you would take only the parts of him that he was willing to give to you.

“I miss you, too.”