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straylightdream · 3 years ago

Text

Somebody Else: l.mh, b.c (m)

featuring: lee know x f.reader, bang chan x f.reader

friends to lovers au

word count: 16.4k

She loved him more then anything or anyone in all the galaxy. From the moment they met he was suddenly her everything.

genre: reader insert, angst, romance, unrequited love, smut, explicit sexual content, unprotected sex. mentions of pregnancy.

an: this one of my stories I have reworked from my old tumblr spidey-babe-paker

When it came to him the sun rose and sat in his eyes. In your small existence you had never felt anything close to what you felt for him. You couldn’t see any part of your future that he wasn’t in.

You and Minho met back when you were in high school, and the moment you spoke for the first time something between you just clicked. It was almost as if everything in your life had led up to your meeting. You clearly remember the first time you watched him walk down the hallway towards you. You were the girl who had just moved to town and barely had any friends. Fate had something planned, and your locker was right next to Lee Minho’s. The first time he met you he shook your hand and introduced himself. You can still remember the electric feeling that ran across your skin as you touched. No one you had ever met was as kind as him. The moment he realized you didn’t have any friends he informed you that you were now friends. From that moment your life seemed to revolve around him.

Sitting in your shared kitchen watching as he stood in front of the coffee pot in nothing but a pair of tiny blue boxer-briefs. When it came to modesty Minho didn’t have any when it came to you, he never did. The boy changed in front of you a week into knowing you. He was in your bedroom after school and you were laying on your bed talking to him when he pulled his shirt off and stripped down to his boxers. Your eyes went wide, and your cheeks and the tips of your ears burned bright at the sight of him. You stared for a moment too long and he noticed. He gave you that casual smirk that made you melt and asked, “do you like what you see?” You averted your eyes and just shook your head embarrassed.

The sound of him humming something brought you out of your day dream. Your eyes stayed locked on his as he poured himself a cup of coffee. His bottom lip was captured between his teeth as he walked towards you. Sitting down across from you, he reached and grabbed your iPad that was sitting on the table in front of you. You were supposed to be sending an email for work, but you couldn’t seem to concentrate much at the moment.

“Jiga what are you doing?” he asked, looking at the email.

“I’m supposed to be working on a project that has a deadline next week, but I can’t seem to stay focused on it.”

“Is me walking around in my underwear distracting?” he asked, winking.

Shaking your head and sighing, “you’re always distracting.” Reaching over you grabbed your iPad back from him.

“I like putting on a show for you babe,” he gave you that smirk that he knew made you melt.

In your whole life you didn’t know how you would ever love anyone more than you loved Lee Minho. This man was your everything. He knew how to cheer you up when you were sad, or how to make you laugh when you seemed to be taking everything too serious. You don’t think anyone on earth knew you better than Minho, not even your family.

“So, I’m going to run some errands and swing by work, and then I want to take you out to dinner.”

You weren’t sure why he could possibly want to go to dinner, but you never turned down an opportunity to go out with him.

“Okay sounds good to me, I need to go to work for a while, Chan wants me to check out a script he’s reviewing.”

“Tell Chan he better keep his hands off my girl,” he laughed lightly and stood.

Looking up at him you smiled, “oh I’m your girl?” you raised your eyebrow at him.

“You’re always going to be my girl,” walking towards you he leaned over and pressed his lips to the top of my head. You couldn’t help the huge smile that formed on your face as you watched him walk down the hallway.

-&-

Walking into work found Chan sitting at your desk. He was leaning back in your overpriced chair with his feet kicked up on your desk. His phone was in his hands as he was smirking at the screen.

“Chan why are you at my desk, when your perfectly good desk is located in the office next to mine?” You walked over and picked up his boot cover foot and took them off your clean desk.

“Your office has a better view than mine?” he smirked, sitting his phone down on your desk.

Walking over you sat down in the chair across from him. “You do know we have the same view?”

He shrugged his shoulders and shook his head, “no you have a better view of that tree off to the left.”

You couldn’t help but glare at him and shake your head slowly, “where is the script Chan?”

Reaching on the ground he held up the thick script and sat it down on your desk with a loud thump. You reached over and picked up the script glancing at it.

“What’s it about?”

You and Chan met in college, he was Minho’s roommate freshman year. He had no choice but to be friends with you since you and Minho were together basically every waking moment of the day. Through college you both had the same major so you had a ton of classes together, and then after graduation you both went on to work for the same publishing house.

“You know the same old normal young adult nonsense, but it’s coming from some girl who wrote a bestseller ten years ago and this novel is long awaited. I guess three movie studios are already trying to get rights to it before it's even published,” Chan rolled his eyes.

“Do you think it’s worth being a movie?” you asked, picking up the extremely thick script.

He shrugged his shoulders, “I’m not exactly the target audience, but then again I have read scripts with less plots and the internet loses their goddamn minds over them.”

Looking at the script you read the first page. You couldn’t help but notice that Chan probably wasn’t wrong, it was going to follow the basic formula of young adult novels, but that wasn’t a bad thing. People tend to love those types of books, you were one of them. You couldn’t even count how many books like this you had bought from bookstores and loved them.

“If you think it will sell well, and especially with people highly anticipating this novel, I would say push it through. If you don't, Mr. Choi might fire your ass.”

He rolled his eyes and reached over to grab the script back from me, “Alright (YN) I’ll send it through.”

You narrowed your eyes staring at him realizing he didn’t actually need your help with this. “Why did you ask for my help, that's a slam dunk script you didn’t need me to tell you that?”

Shrugging his shoulders, he stood up holding the script under his arm, “I don’t know (YN), I guess I like hearing I’m right about something.”

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes and he walked out of your office. Walking over and sitting down in your chair that Chan had just been sitting in. You looked down at your phone to find a text from Minho.

Minho: Hey I’m feeling like having pasta for dinner.

You didn’t understand how a man with the body that he had could possibly eat as much pasta as he did. Minho's body was as if he was made from stone, and then there was you, a girl with a soft body and curves.

(YN): You always want pasta.

Sitting your phone down on your desk you opened up your emails to see if you had any new deadlines to meet. Before you could even click to open a new email from Mr.Choi, Chan walked back into your office.

“(YN), are we going out for your birthday tomorrow,” he asked leaning against the door frame.

You hadn’t even thought about your birthday. Minho had brought it up a couple times, but you always brushed him off because you were busy with work stuff.

“I don’t know,” you shrugged my shoulders.

“Am I going to have to plan this with Minho, aren’t I?”

You glanced up at him and glared, “I feel like even if I don’t want to go out, with you two that’s not an option.”

He smirked and moved so he was no longer leaning against the doorframe, “basically, I’ll hit Minho up.”

Shaking your head, you looked back down at your phone to see another text from Minho.

Minho: Be home at seven for dinner.

(YN): Will do.

-&-

Walking into our apartment you found Minho sitting on the couch waiting for you. His eyes were locked on his phone.

“Jiga you're late,” he held up his wrist and pointed to his watch dramatically.

You rolled your eyes and placed your hands on your hips, “Sorry I arrived three minutes late.”

Before you could say anything else, he stood up and shouted, “three minutes and forty-two seconds late.”

Rolling my eyes so hard I felt like they might get stuck in the back of your head, “alright let’s go then.”

You head out of the apartment and walk down the block to our favorite Italian place. You sat down and Minho was rambling on about which pasta he wanted to get. You looked at him just getting lost in his words not exactly focusing on what he was saying, but the way his lips were slightly turning up as he spoke.

“What are you getting?” he asked, sitting the menu down.

“Angel hair pasta,” you said, sitting my menu down.

The waitress came over and took your order and you sat there for a moment before Minho cleared his throat.

“I have something I need to tell you,” he sounded like he was nervous to say whatever he was about to say.

“What do you need to tell me?” You reached over and rested my hand on his.

“So, I’m going to be a father, Mai is pregnant.”

Your world suddenly started spinning on its side as your eyes grew wide. The feeling of bile crawling up your throat made you feel sick. All the color must have drained from your face as Minho stared at you with a concerned look. Your heart felt like it shattered into a million pieces right in Minho's hand. In that exact moment you realized Lee Minho didn’t return your feelings, and he was never going to. Your eyes suddenly wanted to water as you fought like hell not to cry.

Minho and Mai had been dating for a year, he was head over heels with her. The problem with Mai was that she didn’t like you at all, she was extremely jealous of you. Her and Minho had gotten into a couple big fights over the fact that Minho lived with you. You can’t lie you didn’t like her at all. She was stuck up and always rude to you. Minho always asked you what you thought of her, and you always told him the same thing, “my opinions of who you’re dating shouldn’t matter. I just want you to do what makes you happy.”

Minho happiness was the only thing that mattered in your life. You didn’t know why the universe thought it was okay to make you love someone who was never going to love you the same way. Sure, he loved you, he told you all the time that he loved you. That you were his girl. But you can love someone and not be in love with them. Minho was the only man you had ever loved, and you didn’t think you could love anyone the way you loved him.

“(YN) did you hear me?” he asked, snapping out of your thoughts.

“Yeah congratulations,” you gently squeezed his hand and watched as his eyes lit up.

He nodded his head and said, “I can’t believe I’m going to be a father.”

One thing about Minho that anyone who ever met him knew, was that he couldn’t wait to be a father. He was a man who desperately wanted a wife and kids. He had mentioned a couple months back to you that he possibly wanted to marry Mai in the next five years. When he said it in all honesty it hurt like hell, but you just brushed it off and tried to forget it. You couldn’t help but wonder when he knocked her up. Your skin crawled at the thought of them conceiving their child while you were in the apartment with them. You hated just thinking about Mai being able to touch him the way you wished you could.

You ate dinner and listened to Minho ramble on about Mai and your brain wasn’t holding any of the information he was telling you. You just nodded your head and smiled, acting like you were fully invested in the fact that Mai was going to have the life that you had dreamed of having.

Walking back to the apartment Minho had his arm over your shoulder like he always did. People who didn’t actually know your friendship always assumed you were together. It probably had something to do with the lack of personal space you seemed to have, and the fact you lived together. On any other night or day, you would have loved having his arm around you as you walked down the street, but right then and there it felt like his hand was in your chest shattering what few pieces were left of your heart.

As you entered the apartment Minho’s phone started ringing. Looking down he smiled really big, and you couldn’t help but assume it was Mai calling.

“Do you mind if I take this?” he asked, holding up his phone.

You shook your head, “go ahead, I’m gonna shower and then head to bed, I have an early day at work tomorrow.”

Walking off to your room closing the door, you took a deep breath and let out a shaking sigh. You were still attempting to hold back the tears that had been dying to fall all night. You weren’t ready to break down over this. Hell, you didn’t ever want to break down over this. You needed to be stronger. Holding your eyes closed tightly you fought back the tears. You stripped away your clothes, tossing them on the floor. At that moment you didn’t care about leaving a mess behind. Walking off to the bathroom completely bare, you turned on the water and didn’t bother waiting for it to warm up. You just stepped into the cold water and gasped as it hit your skin. Running your shaky fingers down your wet face as the water started to warm the sob broke through your chest as the tear finally started to fall. Your body shook as you sobbed, your arms wrapped around your body trying to stop the tears. You knew you needed to just let them out though. You didn’t have to hide your feelings while you were alone in the shower. Where the sound of the water falling would hide the sounds of your sobs.

You stayed in the shower until you could get yourself together, once you were no longer sobbing. As the tear continued to gently slide down your cheeks, You turned the water off and stepped out of the shower. Wrapping a towel around your wet body and walking off into your bedroom. Without even bothering to get dressed you crawled into bed still just wrapped in a towel.

Laying the silent dark room tear continued to slide down your face at the fact that your delusional little fairy tale was never going to happen.

The sound of a soft knock on the door caused you to still for a moment.

“(YN), did you want to watch a movie?” Minho asked from the other side of the door.

You opened your mouth to speak and yet nothing came out. You closed my eyes in the moment deciding to act like you had fallen asleep.

Another soft knock came through and you heard him, “(YN), are you asleep?”

Silently you held your eyes shut holding your breath waiting for him to give up. You couldn’t do it anymore tonight. You couldn’t go out there and act like you were happy. You were hurt even though you felt like you didn’t have a right to be hurt. Minho wasn’t yours and he was never going to be.

The sound of his footsteps walking away from your room let me know that he had given up.

Time went by slowly as you laid there staring at the wall. You had managed to stop crying for about ten minutes when you heard him knock on your bedroom door softly one more time.

“(YN),” he paused and heard him take a deep breath. “I don’t know what’s going on, but I love you and I’ll see you in the morning.”

Taking your bottom lip between your teeth the tears slid down your cheek once more as you heard him open and close the door next to yours. You slowly crawled out of your bed and threw on your pajamas quickly and went to reach for your door handle. As your fingers grazed the cool metal, you thought about what you would actually say to him. You couldn’t tell him he broke your heart, he didn’t realize you loved him before, and tonight shouldn’t change it. You dropped your hand and stared at the handle knowing that you owed him an explanation, but you couldn’t bear to actually ever give it to him. Shaking your head, you stepped away from the door and walked back over to your bed and crawled under the covers.

You didn't actually know how to act like you weren’t heartbroken around him, and it might just kill you to act like you’re completely fine.

-&-

You thought when the sun came up, maybe you would wake up and not want to cry again. You were a fool to think that. You woke up in the morning feeling still just as heartbroken. Lying in bed you stared at the wall and heard Minho’s bedroom door open. You held your breath as you heard him step towards your bedroom door. His hand gently knocked on the door.

“Birthday girl, are you awake?”

“Yeah,” you said, speaking to him for the first time since last night. Your voice slightly shook, but you hoped he couldn’t tell that you had been crying.

“Get out of bed lazy, I’m gonna make coffee for you and pancakes,” his voice had a slight gravel to it and you could tell he had just woken up.

“Okay,” you couldn’t bring yourself in the moment to say more than one-word answers to him.

You heard his footsteps move down the hallway towards the kitchen and you let out a sigh. Slowly crawling out of bed and walking over to your closet you attempt to find something to wear to work. You knew whatever you wore to work you was going to have to wear out to celebrate your birthday. You knew there was no way that either Minho or Chan were going to let me get away without going out for my birthday tonight. You dressed in a cute button up flowy blouse and pair of tight jeans that according to Minho and Chan made your butt look amazing. Walking into your bathroom to brush your teeth and put some makeup on. You made sure to coat your eyelashes in waterproof mascara because there was no way to hide the fact that you would probably be crying again today. Pulling your hair back away from your face. You walked over to your closet and grabbed your black pointed flats and walked out of your bedroom.

Stopping at the end hallway before the kitchen you took a deep breath getting ready to face Minho again. You found him reaching into the fridge grabbing cream for your cups of coffee. He was in his normal breakfast attire of nothing but a tiny pair of boxer-briefs that showed off his body that looked like it was carved from marble.

He turned and looked at you, giving you a crooked smile, and your heart raced.

“Good morning birthday girl,” he walked over and pulled you into his basically naked body for a tight hug. Leaning down his lips pressed to the top of your head. Releasing you he looked down at you with looks as if he was trying to decide what to say. “(YN), what happened last night? You went to bed so early.”

Reaching up you scratched the back of your neck and looked down at the ground, “I was just really tired and didn’t feel well.”

Walking over to the counter where your coffee was located, he turned back to you and asked, “are you feeling better today?”

“A little better, I think I might just have a bug.”

“Are you going to be able to go out tonight?” he asked, walking over towards you carrying a cup of coffee.

You nodded your head knowing that you couldn’t say you didn’t want to go out, “yeah I can still go out.”

“I was thinking we could all go to Jameson’s Bar tonight,” he smiled as he walked back towards the sink.

“Yeah,” you didn’t know what else to say to him right then.

He walked back over holding a plate of pancakes and set them down in front of you. You watched as he walked over and sat across from you at the table.

“I had to make breakfast for the birthday girl.”

You gave him a small smile, “thanks Minho.”

You ate breakfast together and Minho was talking about random things. You hate that just hearing him get passionate about random things just makes you smile.

After eating, you head off to work and Minho told me that you were all going to meet at Jameson’s at seven after he got off from work with Jisung.

Walking into work you found Chan once again sitting at your desk, but this time he was holding flowers for you and had your favorite latte from the place down the street sitting on your desk. With a kiss on your soft cheek he wished you happy birthday before heading off to his own office.

Work seemed to go by quickly before you knew it was six and you were off from work. Chan went with you back to your apartment so you could change quickly. He sat in the living room charging his phone for a little while.

Walking into the living room he whistled at you when he saw you had changed into a dress. You just rolled your eyes and sat down on the couch next to him.

“Trying to find yourself a man tonight?” he asked, throwing his arm across the back of the blue sofa he was sitting on.

“Oh god no,” you said, causing him to laugh.

“We got about fifteen minutes until we're supposed to be at the bar. Did you want to get a cab or walk there?” he asked.

“Let’s walk, I need the fresh air,” you stood up slowly.

As you arrived at the bar Jisung, Minho, and Jeongin were already inside with a booth for you. The moment you got to the booth everyone jumped out to wish you a happy birthday.

“Let’s go get a drink,” Chan put his arm over your shoulder and led you across the bar.

Sitting at the bar, you stared at Chan who was holding out a tequila shot for you. You just shook your head not wanting to take it. You hated taking shots and he knew it.

“I don’t want that Chan,” You shook your head with a disgusted look on your face.

“(YN), we both know you have to take it,” he smirked, moving it towards your hand.

“No, you take it,” you pushed his hand back.

“It’s not my birthday, it’s yours,” he moved the shot towards your face.

Your eyes narrowed as you glared at him, “if I get super drunk you better take care of my ass.”

“You know Minho and I will take care of you.”

You flinched slightly at the mention of Minho’s name, and you think Chan noticed his eyes softened as he gave you a concerned look.

“Are you and Minho okay?” he sat the shot down on the counter.

You nodded your head lying. You couldn’t have this conversation with him right now and let alone in a room where Minho was about twenty feet away. Without thinking you reached over and grabbed the glass holding the gold liquor and quickly took it. Chan’s seemed to grow even more concerned as you sat the glass down on the counter with a clink.

“You know you can talk to me, right?” his strong hand rested on your shoulder as he looked at you with a look of concern.

You nodded your head lightly, “Yeah I know Chan, everything is fine.”

Taking a step away from him, you walked over to the booth where Jisung and Jeongin were sitting and slid in next to Jeongin.

“What’s the birthday girl drinking?” Jisung asked.

“Nothing right now,” You said, not wanting to actually drink anymore.

“Well let’s change that,” Jisung said before he managed to wave down a waitress. You’re not exactly sure what he ordered but a couple minutes later she arrived back with two shots of that dreaded gold liquor and a glass that looked like cranberry and vodka. Jisung handed you the shot and you didn’t even bother telling him no. You just clinked your small glasses and took the second shot with him.

As you sipped on your cranberry and vodka Minho walked over and slid in next to you in the booth holding what looked to be a cranberry in vodka in one hand. He sat it down in front of you and smiled as he threw his arm over your shoulder pulling you close to him. You tried to smile and act like nothing had suddenly changed between you, but it was honestly really hard on your part.

“Drink up, birthday girl,” Minho said, handing you your already half drink glass that Jisung had bought you.

Taking a large drink of the strong vodka and fruit mixture you looked up as Chan walked over and sat down next to Jisung in the booth. His warm eyes moved between you and Minho as he watched you interact. Bringing the glass back to your lips you chugged the rest that was in the first drink. Setting the glasses down you looked up to see Chan still staring at

at you. You glanced up at Minho to see that he wasn’t even paying attention to you. He was talking to Jisung about something and laughing.

You were snapped out of your thoughts when someone gently kicked your shin and you looked across the table at Chan whose eyes were narrowed on you. You mouthed “I’m fine” attempting to get him to leave you alone. Whatever you were feeling at the moment didn’t need to be shared with anyone, especially with Chan who was really good friends with Minho.

As the night went on the alcohol was starting to take effect on you. Your body felt warm and fuzzy as you were now sitting on the other side of the booth sitting next to Chan. Minho had just left the table to take a phone call and Jisung and Jeongin were on the other side of the bar dancing on the small dance floor.

Reaching for your glass you glanced over at Chan who was still staring at you.

“Chan have you looked at anyone other than me tonight?” you were way passed tipsy, but it wasn’t like you hammered or anything.

“What are you not telling me?” he reached down and rested his hand on your thigh. In all the time you had known Chan he had gotten pretty good at reading how you actually felt about a situation. You knew you couldn’t actually hide how I was feeling from him.

“Chan dropped it,” you brought the glass up to your lips and took another big gulp.

“What’s going on with you and Minho?” he raised his eyebrow.

You avoided his question and silently looked at the table.

“Every time his name has been mentioned or he touches you, you seem extremely uncomfortable and that is really weird. As long as I have known you, you have always been the happiest around him.”

You held your eyes closed as you suddenly had the desire to cry, “Minho didn’t do anything.”

He shook his head as he glanced up to see Minho walking into the bar holding Mai’s hand. Your stomach dropped at the sight of them together.

Chan gently squeezed your thigh and you looked at him to see him staring at you with sad eyes, “You love him don’t you.”

“You know I do, he’s my best friend,” you tried to act like it was causal, that the sight of them together and happy didn’t make you sick to my stomach.

“You’re in love with him, aren’t you?”

You dropped your head suddenly feeling stupid that you even let yourself have these feeling for him. It was obvious that he didn’t turn them.

“Chan…” you didn’t even know how to deny it. It was completely obvious to him. He knows you better than almost anyone other than Minho.

“He doesn’t know, does he?” Chan’s voice was low as he realized what was going on with you.

You shook your head as you looked over at Minho who was leaning against the bar making out with Mai. “Have you ever told him?”

“No, I couldn’t ever. Our friendship means too much to me, for me to lose him. Also I’m not his type at all. He likes girls that are tiny and pretty like Mai, and not girls like me.”

“He’s an idiot if he doesn’t see what’s right in front of him,” he sighed. “You might not think you’re beautiful (YN), but I think you're gorgeous. I always have,” the side of his mouth turned up into a smile as he stared at me. You felt your cheeks burn.

“Did he tell you Mai is pregnant?” You ask softly.

Chan’s eyes went wide with a look of surprise letting you know that Minho hadn’t told anyone other than you.

“Yeah he told me last night he’s gonna be a dad, and that broke my heart.”

Before Chan could even respond Minho and Mai walked over to your booth and sat down.

“Happy birthday,” Mai said, giving you the same fake smile she always seemed to give you.

“Thanks,” you gave her the best smile you could muster up.

She leaned over and grabbed Minho’s face and started kissing him. You looked down at the table and Chan must have known how uncomfortable you suddenly felt because he reached down and laced his fingers with yours. Your eyes moved from the table over to Chan. You gave him a half smile and he squeezed your hand.

“Why don’t we get you another shot?” Minho out of nowhere.

“I’m good,” you said, not wanting to drink anymore.

“Come on, I’ll take one with you,” he smiled.

“Okay,” You realized then you’re always gonna have a hard time saying no to him.

Minho ordered you two shots of tequila. You looked at the shot glass and looked up at Minho who was holding his towards you. You picked yours up and gently clinked your glasses together.

“Happy birthday (YN),” he said before tossing back the shot.

You all sat at the table talking for about two hours when you let out a loud yawn in your inebriated state.

“I’m ready for bed,” you let out a sigh, hoping you could go to bed finally.

“How about I take you home,” Chan said, speaking up.

You nodded your head liking the sound of that.

“Baby why don’t you come to my apartment tonight?” Mai asked Minho, making you want to throw up.

“I have to take care of the birthday girl,” Minho looked up at you, probably noticing that you were quite drunk.

“Baby, Chan can take care of her,” Mai whined.

“Chan, can you take care of her?” Minho asked almost as if you weren't sitting right next to Chan.

“I don’t know if she wants me to take care of her.” Chan looked over at you almost as if he wanted to know if you were okay with him taking me home.

“Chan, can you just take me home? I’m not a child, I’m fine once I get inside,” You groaned standing up from the booth. You were extremely over being in a small area with Minho and Mai.

“Yeah I got you,” Chan crawled out of the booth quickly and stood next to you.

Jisung and Jeongin walked over together from the dance floor.

“You guys heading out?” Jeongin asked.

“Yeah the birthday girl is tired,” Minho said as he stood up out of the booth. He walked over and wrapped his arms around you pulling you into his chest. He leaned down and pressed his lips to the top of your head. “Goodnight birthday girl,” he said softly.

“Goodnight Minho,” you said, pulling away from him.

Jisung and Jeongin both walked over and gave you hugs goodbye. As the group left the bar Chan reached down and laced his fingers with yours as he led you down the street the short distance to yours and Minho’s apartment.

You didn’t talk about anything until you were about a block away when he finally broke the silence between us, “do you ever plan on telling him how you feel?”

You shook your head and sighed, “nope. It’s pointless now.”

Walking inside Chan still held your hand as we took the elevator up to your floor. You walked into your apartment and you dropped his hand and walked straight to your bed. Walking into the bathroom that was connected to my bedroom you grabbed a makeup wipe to quickly remove your make-up. You smeared away your makeup and walked back into my room to find Chan sitting on your bed. You didn’t bother saying anything as you took your flats off and crawled into bed next to Chan. Standing up he walked over and pressed his lips to your forehead for a lingering kiss.

“Are you okay?” he asked with his face still close to yours .

“No,” you whispered as tears silently started to slide down your cheeks.

“I don’t want to leave you alone,” he said sitting down on the edge of the bed next to you.

“I don’t want to be alone,” you sighed as the tears slowly slid down your cheeks.

He nodded his head and walked over to the other side of the bed and laid down next to you on my full-size bed. Without saying a word, you scooted across the bed and cuddled up against him with your head on his chest. You sighed as you didn’t bother trying to hide your tears. He rubbed your side as he held you while I

you cried in his arms. You and Chan had cuddled before, but never like this. This seemed much more intimate as he comforted you.

“You’re allowed to be hurt,” he whispered.

“I’m such a fool,” you murmured trying to not sob. Your inebriated state probably was making you even more emotional. If you were sober, you probably wouldn’t be in bed with Chan crying over the fact that Minho didn’t love you.

“You aren’t a fool,” he said, leaning down and connecting his lips to the top of your head.

“Can you please just stay with me, right now I just want to feel wanted?” you begged. You must have sounded pathetic to him, as you laid on him crying about Minho and begging him to stay with you.

“Yeah I’ll stay with you,” he said softly as he reached up and brushed away some of the tears off your cheek.

You’re not sure how long you laid there crying against him but the tears stopped right before your eyes grew too heavy to stay awake.

-&-

You woke in the morning and were surprised you didn’t wake up with a killer headache. You glanced up to see Chan slowly stirring in bed next to you. You couldn’t help but notice how pretty he looked when he was first waking up.

“Morning,” Chan yawned as he stretched in bed next to you. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m pretty okay oddly, but I feel like I need to shower,” you sighed.

“Why don’t I get up and make some coffee while you shower?” you watched as he slowly crawled out of bed.

He was still dressed in his jeans and shirt from yesterday and you looked down to see that you were still in your clothes from the night before as well. Chan walked out of the room and gave you one last smile before shutting the door.

Getting out of bed you stripped away your clothes and stepped into the shower. It was an odd feeling taking a shower while you knew Chan was waiting for you in the kitchen.

You had been practically single all of your twenties. You had gone on a couple dates and even hooked up with a guy who used to work with you and Chan but for the most part you weren’t open to seeing anyone, because of your feelings you had toward Minho. You sure as hell hadn’t shared a bed with anyone in an extremely long time. You couldn’t lie, it felt nice to be held by someone until you went to sleep.

After showering you dressed yourself in leggings and sweater, and you walked into the kitchen to find Chan drinking a cup of coffee.

Sitting down at the table across from Chan you played with the bottom of the sleeves of your sweater. He pushed the second cup of coffee that was sitting next to him. Picking up the cup you brought it up to your lips enjoying the feeling of the warm caffeinated liquid.

“I’m shocked you aren’t hungover,” he said softly.

Shrugging your shoulders, you softly said, “maybe crying over a broken heart is the way to counteract a hangover.” You bark out a sarcastic laugh and Chan gives you a sad smile.

“(YN) are you okay?” You knew he was worried about you, and you could hear it in his tone.

You slowly nodded your head, “I’m going to be fine.”

Before you could say anything, the front door opened and Minho walked in still in his clothes from the night before. He stopped at the table and looked between You and Chan with a confused look. You think he might have noticed that Chan was still wearing his clothes from the night before.

“Did you spend the night Chan?” Minho said with his eyes narrowing on Chan.

Chan nodded his head and glanced at you and then back at Minho, “yeah I slept on the couch I didn’t want to leave her alone in the apartment after she had been drinking.”

“Thanks,” Minho stepped towards him and patted him on the back as he walked further into the kitchen. “(YN), you’re a lifesaver for making coffee.”

“Chan made it, I took a shower and came out to find fresh coffee,” Minho looked over at you and you could tell by his look that he had a lot of questions.

“Did you guys sleep together?” Minho boldly asked.

“No Minho,” you said, technically lying, because you did sleep in the same bed, but you didn’t have sex like you guess Minho assumed you did.

“Minho she was drunk and I was sober, you and I both know I would never take advantage of her,” Chan’s tone sounded like he was kind of annoyed.

“I know that, I was just kind of shocked to see you still in your clothes from the night before,” Minho said as he poured himself a cup of coffee.

“Chan was just being a really good guy taking care of me,” you say speaking up. You didn’t like that Minho was being so nosy about Chan staying over. especially after he pawned you off Chan last night asking him to take care of you.

Minho walked over and sat down at the table in between you and Chan. You were all sitting there, drinking coffee and making small talk. Chan stayed over for about an hour before he said he had to head out because he had some stuff at home he had to do. After he left Minho excused himself to go take a shower and you chilled in the living room looking at a Young Adult script you had taken home to check out. You read it for about a half hour when Minho walked into the living room. He had his laptop and sat down on the couch next to you. You were working in comfortable silence for a while when there was a knock on the door. You thought maybe Jisung or Chan was coming over. Minho closed his laptop and jumped up to go answer the door. You looked over at the door to see Mai. You looked away and rolled your eyes, it was getting to the point you were rarely getting alone time with Minho anymore. Mai was constantly popping her head in whenever she could, and it was safe to say you hated it. You don’t think she could do anything to actually make you like her.

“If it isn’t the drunk birthday girl,” she said walking into the living room.

“Hey Mai,” You attempted to give her a small smile.

You kept my eyes locked on the script you were reading as you heard them start to make out. Minho was never the person who would openly make out with someone until he met her. You’re pretty sure she constantly made out with him to prove to you that he belonged to her.

“I heard Minho told you that he’s going to be a father,” she rested her hand on her stomach as she sat down on the spot on the couch Minho had been sitting on.

You nodded your head as you prayed to yourself that there was some way in hell, you weren’t going to talk to her about her unborn child, “yeah congrats.”

“With Minho as the father this baby is going to be beautiful,” she smiled.

You tilted your head and gave a pained nod, “yeah Minho has some great genetics.”

Minho walked over and sat on the couch next to Mai and wrapped his arm around her. He looked over at you and gave you a smile letting you know that he was truly happy. You know it made you a terrible friend, but that broke your heart.

“I’m gonna let you guys have some alone time, I have some questions about this script so I’m going to go see Chan,” You quickly stood up. You needed any excuse at all to get away from the love birds.

Walking off to my room you found a pair of black flats and your purse. You didn’t bother putting on any makeup because you were just going to Chan’s apartment, and he had already seen you today without makeup on.

Walking towards the front door you looked over at Minho who was cuddling up with Mai on the couch and you said, “Minho I’ll be back later.”

“Okay (YN),” he said, not bothering to look back.

You hailed a cab quickly and went straight to Chan’s apartment. Your hand hit his door rapidly praying that he would answer the door soon. You needed to escape from Minho and Mai. You couldn’t go back to the apartment and listen to Mai talk about her perfect life with Minho anymore.

Chan answered the door and gave me a confused look. His eyes traveled down to the script I was holding and he asked, “I thought you didn’t need my help on that script.”

“I lied to Minho and said I needed your help,” You paused and sighed fighting the urge to cry, “I just needed to escape from Minho and Mai. She came over and was gloating all about how pretty her baby with Minho was going to be. I know it makes me a terrible person but hearing about her perfect life with Minho, makes me sick to my stomach.” You knew you were rambling and you probably sounded like a crazy person but you needed to get all this off my chest.

He didn’t say anything, he just reached over and wrapped his arms around you holding you close to him. His hand ran up and down your back as if he was trying to calm you down.

“You aren’t a terrible person, you’re heartbroken. If I was you, I wouldn’t want to hear about it either.”

“How can you turn off feelings for someone?” You asked him as you pulled away slightly and looked up into his warm eyes.

“Unfortunately, you can’t turn them off, you just try to move on.”

Closing your eyes pushing back the tears that were trying to fall. “I don’t want to feel anything for him anymore. Nobody wants me, why would Minho want me?” You sound truly pathetic and you knew it.

“Hey,” he placed his large hand on your cheek, and stared into your eyes with an intense look. “People want you.”

“It doesn’t feel that way,” you sighed.

Silently he leaned forward and connected his lips to yours. His lips felt electric against yours, his strong hand rested on your cheek as your lips moved for a moment. Pulling away you both stared at each other almost as if we were in shock of what had just happened.

“(YN), I don’t think you realize how beautiful I think you are,” his voice was low as his hand was still resting on your cheek. His thumb glides across your skin gently as he stares at you.

Without another thought you leaned up and crashed your lips into his. With your eyes held tightly closed your lips moved against his almost as if you couldn’t breathe without him. Your fingers latched onto his shirt pulling his toned body close to yours. At that moment you couldn’t seem to physically get any closer to him. His lips moved from the side of your mouth and he started kissing your neck causing you to moan. His lips pulled away from your skin and he stared at me with lust blown eyes, and you felt your stomach fill with butterflies. You don’t think in your entire existence had ever had anyone look at you like Chan was right then.

Both your chest were heaving up and down as if you were both trying to stay calm in that moment. You weren’t even sure what was happening right then, and you didn’t know what was about to happen. His hand went under your chin and lifted your head so you were staring right into his lust filled eyes.

“You deserve the world,” his voice was low and filled with need.

Without saying anything to him you reached down for the belt on his pants. My hands were a little shaky as you fumbled with his belt. His lips went down the base of your neck as you unbuckled his pants. The moment his buckle was undone you managed to get the button, and zipper undone of his jeans. His lips gently nipped at your skin and you couldn’t hold back the moan that fell from your lips. His hand moved down and pushed his way inside my leggings and panties, and moaned again as his finger brushed your sensitive bundle of nerves. I gasped tilting my head back, as his finger continued to stroke my sensitive core. Without thinking you reached over and you pushed your hand down the front of his pants and started palming his almost fully hard erection. Pulling his lips away from your skin his eyes locked on mine as we both stared at each other as you touched each other. You captured your bottom lip between my teeth moaning as his fingers worked on your clit.

“Baby you can finally let go,” his voice was still low as he stared at you with a look of hunger.

You nodded your head, unable to say anything. You weren’t even sure if my brain was even able to form words at that moment.

His lips crashed against your for another electric kiss, you moaned into his mouth as he pushed you over the edge. Your walls pulled at nothing as your high washed over you gasping for air into his kiss. You removed your hand from his pants and stared at him pulling your lips away from him.

My chest was rising and falling as you attempted to come down from your high. Silently he fell to his knees in front of you, and hooked his fingers into the elastic of your leggings and slowly slid them down. Slowly he removed your black flats and leggings, before reaching up to remove your lavender cheeky undies that you had been wearing. He bit his bottom lip as he stared at your completely exposed bottom half. You couldn’t even say anything, you just stared at him. His lips moved forward and pressed a gentle kiss to your exposed mound before he stood up. Without a second thought you connected your lips to his for a passionate kiss. You slowly started walking together with your lips still dancing. He only pulled away when you were about two feet from his large couch that was in the middle of his living room. He dropped down to the couch pulling you with him so you were straddling his thighs. He reached into his pocket to pull his wallet out, he flipped it open and pulled out a foil packet and then stared at me for a long moment.

“We can stop if you want. I’m not pressuring you into doing anything, whatever happens here is your call,” he said holding the foil packet.

“Please let me know what it feels like to be wanted,” You think it was the first actual thing you had actually said to him since we started this. The whole thing just didn’t feel real to be honest. You’re desperate to feel wanted.

“I have never wanted anything more in the world, then how much I want you right now” he sighed pushing his hips up off the couch so he could push his jeans and boxer-briefs down enough to free his erection. You couldn’t help but stare at his hard erection for a moment before he slid the rubber down his length. His length is a beautiful shade of pink with a vein running underneath that reminds you of his veins that map out his arms.

You sat up on your knees and moved closer to him and connected your lips to his for a sloppy kiss. Your lips moved together as you reached between you to line him up with your entrance. Pulling away and gasping as you slid slowly down his length. As he bottomed out, you stilled and stared at him for a long moment. You reached up and took his face in both hands and stared at him for a moment.

“Make me forget him,” You whispered before sliding up his length.

Without saying anything he pressed his lips to the side of your neck leaving a trail of wet kisses as your hips moved up and down. You were never the type of girl who liked being on top. You were never personally comfortable in your own skin, and you felt like being on top would put you on full display. Even though you were basically fully dressed from the waist up, Chan made you feel extremely vulnerable in the best way possible.

Your hands were resting on his shoulders as you used his body as leverage to help you move against him. His strong hands reached up to massage my sweater covered breast. Each push and pull of his length was intoxicating. You let out a moan and leaned forward resting your forehead against his as you continued to move together. He slowly reached between you to play with your sensitive bundle of nerves. You gasp at the tight feeling of the coil in your stomach letting you know that your high was growing near.

“I need help,” you whimper, grabbing his hand. You place his hand on your hip and he takes that as his sign to help move your body.

You rode him like your life depended on it. You want him in every way possible. Your lips connect to his neck leaving a trail of wet kisses in your aftermath.

“I’m so close,” he moaned.

Pulling away from him with eyes wild you’re lost in a sea of lust and desperation.

“Chan…” you couldn’t even think of any other words to say to him.

“I got you baby, just let go,” and as you sank down onto his length, you hit your high, your velvety walls tugged on his length. He moaned into your ear sending a shiver down your spine. His hands gripped your round hips to help you move up and down his length so he could hit his own high. He sank you down on his length roughly and he cursed hitting his own high. You sat there still completely attached as both of you rode out your highs. He took your face in his hands again and connected your lips for a sloppy kiss. The kiss reminded you of when you drunkenly kiss someone and you both use too much tongue, but for some reason this was the most erotic kiss you had ever experienced in your life.

You parted and he reached up and pushed your matted hair behind your ear that had fallen into your face, and he gave me a smile that made the tips of your ears burn.

“I don’t think I have ever had sex with this much clothing on,” he rasped. You couldn’t help but smile at the fact that I looked up and down his basically full covered body. He literally still had his shoes and socks on and was only exposed where he had pushed his jeans about half way down his thighs to free himself. “Literally didn’t even get to fully look at you.”

“Chan what just happened?” You asked, realizing fully what you had just done. You felt suddenly extremely nervous about it. Up until today you didn’t even realize that Chan would ever even want anything like this with you.

“Hey,” he took your face in his hands once again and looked into your eyes. “Don’t freak out on me right now. What just happened was a long time coming on my part.”

You knit my eyebrows together as you stared at him trying to process what just happened, “you’ve wanted that to happen?”

He nodded his head and smiled, “Jiga, I know you have a lot going on in your mind right now. I fully understand that you are still in love with Minho, but I need you to know that there are other people in this world that want you.”

“Thank you, Chan,” You said as he removed his hands from your face.

“I want you to know that you don’t owe me anything (YN), if you want what just happened to be a one-time thing it can. I personally don’t want it to be, but I want you to know whatever happens is all up to you.” He leaned forward and pressed his lips to your forehead for a gentle kiss. “Did you maybe want to get dressed and we can watch a movie or a tv show on the couch, and maybe cuddle?”

You slowly slid off his softened length and said, “I would like that.”

Chan stood up and removed his condom and walked into the corner to dispose of it as you walked over to where Chan had taken off your panties and leggings. you pulled them back on and walked over and sat down on the couch next to Chan who had pulled his pants back up fully. He held the remote in one hand and had the other arm wrapped around you pulling you close to his side. He flipped through Netflix attempting to figure out what to watch. You settled for watching some episodes of How I Met Your Mother.

Spending time like this with Chan felt so natural and you couldn’t lie he was starting to make you feel things you didn’t think that you would ever feel again, but was most important was he was making me feel like you was truly wanted

-&-

Walking back into the apartment you found Minho sitting on the couch, but this time he was luckily alone. Biting your lip, you wondered if you could get away with just walking to your room and avoid talking to him. You felt like the fact that you had slept with Chan was weighing down on your shoulders. You and Minho always told each other everything. You remembered the awkward conversation you had with him your freshman year of college when you lost my virginity to Seo Changbin after a frat party. You remembered how your cheeks burned with embarrassment as you told him about what happened. Minho was also really honest with you too, when he made the mistake and had a one-night stand with a girl whose name he didn’t even know a couple years ago. Before you could even make the choice, he turned and looked at you and gave you a soft smile.

“Did Chan help you out?” he asked.

Without even thinking you blurted out, “I had sex with Chan.”

He stared at you with a look of shock for a moment before he knit his eyebrows together, and then he let out an annoyed scoff. For some reason his reaction pissed you off a lot.

He stood up and stayed standing by the couch and just stared at you for a long moment. You weren't even sure what you should say to him, but you were suddenly pissed at him.

“So, has this been a thing for a while with you two?” he asked with his hands on his hips.

Silently you shook your head not even sure how to respond to him, “this is the first time it’s ever happened.”

Minho shook his head almost as if he was ashamed of you and it was making you even more annoyed. He walked across the living room closer to you and asked, “so are you having sex with him because he’s convenient?” his hand was on his hips as he stood there with a look of judgement on his face.

“What the fuck Minho?” you had a look of disgust as you stared at him. You couldn’t believe he even had the nerve to ask you that. “How dare you say that.”

“You can’t blame me for asking, because you have literally never shown any sign of liking him, and suddenly you guys are having sex,” his tone was pointed as he stared at you.

“Minho, why are you being an asshole right now?” You couldn’t believe this was actually happening. You and Minho had literally never fought since the moment you became friends.

“Do you even care about him or are you just using him because he’s there?”

What he had just said caused something in you to snap and you took a step towards him and pointed your finger into his strong chest and stared for a moment before you shouted, “I hate the fact that I’m in love with you!”

His eyes went wide and he stared down at you as he reached down and grabbed your wrist. He opened his mouth to speak but before he could say anything, you stopped him.

“I wish I could take back everything I have ever felt for you. Because loving you has never done anything other than break my heart into a million pieces, and right now you are being a selfish asshole. I haven’t ever said anything about the fact that you and Mai don’t make sense. Hell, I just smile and act like I like her, when all she does is give me backhanded compliments and treat me like shit. Minho I’m done putting your happiness before my own, when you don’t even care about me or my feelings.” You pulled your wrist away from his hand and he just stood there silently taking in everything you had just said to him.

“I didn’t know you loved me,” he whispered.

“Lee Minho, I have never loved anyone or anything like I love you, and you did nothing but shatter my heart into a million pieces.”

You stood there in the loudest silence you had ever experienced just staring at each other. You had both said things that were meant to cut deep that neither of you were ever going to be able to take back. You don’t think you could fix what just unfolded between you.

“I need to move out,” you whispered as tears slid down my cheeks.

He shook his head, “no we can fix this.” You stared into his warm eyes and saw the tears starting to brim, “you can’t move out.”

You lost it and you couldn’t help but sob as you said, “we can’t take back what we just said.”

Shaking your head, you walked away from him and walked down the hallway to your room. You heard his footsteps behind you and you shut the bedroom door and locked it. You couldn’t have him barging into your room and convincing me to stay. You desperately needed space from him after what was said. Reaching into your closet you pulled out an overnight bag and sat it on your bed. You started packing clothes when you heard him knock on your door. You shook your head and ignored it as you kept packing.

“(YN), let me in please, we’re not done,” he begged.

“Minho I can’t do this,” You cried, sticking your makeup bag in with everything.

“(YN), you’re my best friend, we can fix this,” he pounded on the door as he begged. By his tone you could tell he was crying just like you.

Picking up your overnight bag you walked over and leaned against the door, and you rested my ear against the door listening to Minho’s uneven breathing as he tried to stop crying. You clenched your hand into a fist and gently hit the door.

“I need to leave,” you cried.

“(YN), I didn’t mean anything I said tonight,” you heard him say as you heard him step away from the door.

You unlocked the door and opened it to find Minho crying leaning against the wall across from your bedroom. He closed his eyes and shook his head most likely knowing you both ruined everything between you.

“I can’t lose you,” he rasped.

“I need some space,” you sighed as you continued to cry.

You walked down the hallway holding your bag tightly in one hand. You opened the front door to find Minho standing at the end of the hallway watching you.

“I’m so sorry jiga.”

“I’m sorry too, Minho”

You walked outside and hailed the cab quickly and headed to the only person you knew was going to tell you everything was going to be okay.

Once again, you knocked on Chan’s door rapidly for the second time in the day. As Chan opened the door, he found you on the other side with tears streaming down your cheeks, biting your bottom lip trying to not sob. Without saying a word he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you into his chest. You couldn’t help the sob that broke as he rubbed your back.

“(YN), what happened?” he asked.

“I told Minho we slept together and we got into a huge fight.”

He pulled away from you and reached down to grab your overnight bag with one hand and took your hand with his other hand and led you inside. He walked you over to his couch and sat down and pulled you down so you were sitting next to him. Silently he reached up and brushed the tears off your cheek.

“Okay, are you guys okay?” he asked.

You shook your head and sighed knowing that things between you and Minho were never going to be the same. In the mix of your screaming match you confessed you were in love with him, and you were never going to be able to take that back.

“I told him I was in love with him, and I proceeded to tell him I needed space from him. That I needed to move out,” you sighed trying to stop crying somewhat.

Chan still had his hand resting on your cheek and proceeded to gently brush the tears off your cheek with his thumb. His warm eyes were gentle as he stared at me.

“Did you want to stay here?”

You nodded your head not even able to say much. You think he realized that he probably shouldn’t ask you too much about you and Minho’s fight. Nobody truly knew what you felt for Minho other than Chan, and you think he realized that it was going to hurt for you to talk about it.

“I can totally sleep on your couch,” you said softly knowing that you were inconveniencing him.

He shook his head and leaned forward and pressed his lips to your forehead before he looked into your sad eyes and said, “my couch is super uncomfortable and my bed is big enough for both of us.”

You gave him a little smile and nodded, “okay.”

“Did you maybe want to get some sleep after the long day you’ve had?” he asked.

You nod as he takes his hand away from your cheek. He stood up and grabbed your overnight bag and started walking across the living room to where his master bedroom was. You followed him into the room and he sat the overnight bag on the bed and turned to find you standing by the door. It suddenly felt so strange to you that not even four hours ago you and Chan had sex on his living room couch, and now you were here awkwardly in his bedroom asking him to take you in. He must have sensed you were overthinking everything because he walked over to you, and gently tilted your head up with his hand under your chin. Staring at you for a second before saying, “hey nothing has to happen between us if you don’t want it to, but I’m gonna lay all the cards out on the table in front of you and put myself on the line.” He paused and took a deep breath, and you suddenly were nervous that Chan was going to reject you. “I like you a lot (YN), and if you just need someone to hold you and tell you that you’re going to be okay. I can be that guy for you. If you just need a friend right now, I completely understand. I don’t want you to worry about hurting my feelings and thinking that I’m expecting you to have sex with me while you’re staying here,” he paused again as if he was gathering his thoughts before continuing.“I want you to know that I have real feeling for you. I like you a lot. I have for a while, but I never acted on my feelings. I’m willing to try to make this whatever you want between the two of us.”

You stared at him completely caught off guard by everything he had just said to you, “you like me?” you never thought Chan saw you as anything more than a friend.

“(YN), I like you a lot. I feel things for you I haven’t felt for many people. I don't want to rush you into anything, but I will give you anything you want.”

You didn’t bother responding. You just leaned forward and pressed your lips to his. Pulling away from him you took his face in both your hands and softly said, “I want to give you everything, but you have to be patient with me. I can’t throw myself into this just yet, but I need you right now Chan.” Your voice sounded desperate as you said the last sentence.

“We can do this slowly (YN), I know there’s still a lot of unresolved feelings with Minho. At some point you’re going to have to sit down and talk to him about the fact you told him you love him.”

You nodded your head knowing that Chan was right. You just needed to take it slow and you needed to talk to Minho, but ultimately you needed time. You needed a few days away from him, you just needed space.

You dropped my hands and said, “can we please go to bed?”

He nodded his head, “yeah why do you get dressed for bed?”

Stepping away from him you walked over to your bag and pulled out a tank top and a pair of sleep shorts before walking into the bathroom that was connected to Chan’s room. You got dressed for bed and walked back into the bedroom and put your bra in your bag before you crawled under the covers to join Chan in bed. You could see his naked torso, that let you know he was probably only sleeping in his boxers. Laying on your side you looked over at Chan who was laying on his back looking over at you. You studied his face for a moment taking in his beautiful features. You didn’t understand why a man as beautiful as Chan would want to be with someone who looked like you.

“If we’re going to share a bed can we possibly cuddle?” Chan asked, causing you to smile. Silently you nodded your head and rolled over letting him know you wanted him to spoon you. You felt the bed move and suddenly you felt his strong arms pulling you close to his body. His arm was across your soft stomach holding you close. You felt him place his lips on your bare shoulder and you couldn’t help the shiver that went down your spine.

“Thank you for taking care of me,” you said softly as I closed your eyes.

With his lips still ghosting your bare skin he whispered, “I’m always going to take care of you.”

-&-

As the morning light shined through the curtains you awoke to soft sunlight in your face and the feeling of something hard poking you back. As your eyes opened, You were able to process what was poking you in the back. You let out a yawn and stretch your stiff body, accidentally brushing your butt against Chan’s morning wood. A soft moan passed his lips letting you know he enjoyed it, but you couldn’t help it when your cheeks burned.

“Good morning,” you heard him yawn behind you.

“Morning,” you said softly rolling over. You accidentally brushed his erection again, but instead of a moan passing his lips his eyes went wide with embarrassment.

“That’s embarrassing to wake up with,” he rolled away from you covering his erection

You tilted your head to the side wondering why he was so embarrassed by it, “don’t most men wake up with that same problem?”

He nodded his head as he quickly crawled out of bed, “I need to shower.”

You sat in bed very confused on why he was acting so weird. You listened as he started the shower and waited and listened for the sound of him opening and closing the sliding door. You knew we agreed to take this slow but you suddenly felt the urge to let him know that even though you were taking it slow with the whole feeling things didn’t mean sex was off the table.

Crawling out of bed and stripped away your clothes and walked into the steamed filled bathroom quietly. You heard Chan moan letting you know that he was trying to take care of his morning wood. You stepped into the shower and he turned and looked at you with a look of surprise. His cheeks burned bright red as he stared at you with his mouth open.

“I know we agreed to take things slow, but that doesn’t mean sex is off the table, right?” You asked, feeling suddenly shy.

“I mean it’s all up to, we’re doing everything at your pace,” his hand was still holding his erection as he stared at you with an embarrassed look.

“Okay, why don’t I help you with that then?” you said trying to be bold.

He nodded his head with a shocked look. You stepped towards him and he removed his hand and gently started stroking him causing him to moan. You stared at him biting your lip. You couldn’t lie watching him seem to turn you on. You pushed your thighs together attempting to hide your arousal as you pumped his length.

You suddenly felt Chan’s strong hand dipped between your folds and started stroking your sensitive bundle of nerves, and you couldn’t help the loud moan that passed your lips. You stood there under the water attempting to get the other off for a few moments before Chan pulled his hand away, and said, “I need to feel you. I don’t want to come on your hand.”

You nodded your head breathlessly. The thought of having sex with Chan in the shower turned you on even more.

“I need to get a condom,” he stepped away from you. causing me to drop his length.

You shook your head and reached down and grabbed his hand, “I’m on the pill and I’m clean if you are.”

“I have never had sex without a condom,” he stared at you with wide eyes.

“Okay I trust you,” you whispered before leaning over and connecting your lips to his for a searing kiss. He placed both his hands on your hips and turned the both of you so your back was against the wall. Pulling his lips away from yours he reached down and took one of your legs hiking it up, and then reached between you lining himself up before sliding into you slowly. He was completely still in you and leaned forward resting his forehead against yours. You closed your eyes enjoying the feeling of him stretching you slowly. As his hips start moving at a slow pace, he holds you thigh up tightly as your hand clung to his back, holding onto him for dear life as thrust in and out of you. Your head rolled back against the tile wall and Chan lips were all over your wet skin kissing anywhere he could possibly kiss. You couldn’t help the loud moans that kept passing your lips. The echoing sounds of moans, and wet skin slapping filled the room.

“Chan,” You moaned.

His thrusting was faster and sloppier than your time on the couch. His hand gripped your skin like a man desperately trying to find his release. The echoing sounds of his pants, and groans were intoxicating.

You couldn’t help but whine as he thrust in and out of you over and over. His hard length rubbing just the right spot in your velvety walls.

“Oh- my- right there,” you ramble on practically on the edge.

“I got you baby, let go,” he encouraged with his lips still on your wet skin.

With his sweet words you let go falling over the edge, as your high took over. Chan got a few more thrust before he released inside you. He slid his softened length out of you and dropped your leg. He wrapped his arms around your torso holding you up as you both rode out your highs. His head was resting against the title wall behind you.

“That was amazing,” he sighed as he panted.

You couldn’t even say anything. You just nodded your head and smiled.

After a few minutes he released you and reached over and grabbed a washcloth and let the warm water cover it before he reached down to your sensitive mound and wiped away his release. He leaned over and gave you a gentle kiss.

“Maybe we should just relax and watch movies today, since we both have work tomorrow,” he asked, reaching over to turn the water off.

“I like that idea,” you said as he stepped out of the shower grabbing a towel for him and then one for you. “Chan thank you for taking care of me, and understanding that I want more, but I’m trying to figure out my head.”

He stepped towards you with a towel wrapped around his waist and said, “hey I don’t want us having sex to freak you out okay. Like we’re good, we’re still going slow with all the emotions and stuff.”

“Okay,” you said softly, smiling.

-&-

It had been a week since you and Minho had your fight, and it was the longest you had ever gone without speaking. There were a few times you wondered if you should cave, and reach out to him. But you honestly weren’t ready. Chan managed to keep your mind off everything when you were alone at his place. You were having sex quite often, but sex with him was very different. With Chan everything you did together was extremely intimate. You had never slept with anyone who seemed to worship you quite like Chan. There were a few nights where you would just lay in bed and he would just kiss his way across your whole body, and would whisper words of praise. You have never in your life felt as confident as you did when you were with Chan. You used to hate wearing a swimsuit in front of people, let alone being naked in front of them, and in the last week you had no problem walking across the house naked in front of Chan. Most nights you didn’t even bother putting on pajamas, and if you did put them on, he would quickly remove them.

Sitting at your desk at work you looked up when Chan was walking up holding what looked to be an iced latte in his hand. He sat down across from you and sat the coffee down in front of a script you were reading.

“How is your day going?” he asked, giving you his signature smile.

You shrugged my shoulders, “okay I’m checking out a new script.”

“I brought you an ice vanilla latte.”

You reached over grabbing the cup, and brought the straw up to your lips and took a sip. You could feel Chan’s eyes burning a hole in you, as I drank the coffee.

“What’s on your mind Chan?” You sat the coffee down and looked at him. You could tell just by the way he was looking at you, that he had something he needed to tell you.

He looked extremely conflicted as he opened his mouth to speak. “I ran into Minho.”

At the mention of Minho’s name your heart dropped. Since you had been basically living with Chan, he hadn’t even mentioned Minho. You’re pretty sure you might have ruined their friendship, and you couldn’t lie. You felt pretty guilty about that. You never actually meant to ruin their friendship.

“How did that go?” You asked worriedly.

“He’s not doing so great, and he asked about you.”

You let out a heavy sigh, “Chan I’m sorry I ruined your guys friendship.”

He reached across the desk and took your hand, “hey, Minho and I are okay. He’s going through a lot at the moment (YN), and honestly, he needs his best friend. You guys should probably talk today.”

You pushed your eyebrows together and suddenly worried about Minho, “is he okay?”

He nodded and squeezed my hand, “yeah he just needs to fix things with his best friend.”

“Chan,” You were suddenly worried that if you went and saw Minho this could mess up whatever was going on with you and Chan. “If I see him it’s not changing anything between us, right?”

He shook his head, “(YN), we’re still good, and you can still keep staying with me too. You and Minho just need to make up.” He stood up and walked over and leaned down and connected his lips to yours for a soft kiss. “We’re good, we can still keep things going between us.”

“Okay, I’ll go see him after work,” You sighed.

As your work day went on it felt like it was going incredibly slow, and that probably had to do with the fact that you were super nervous to actually see Minho. You had thought it over quite a bit what you planned on saying to him, but you knew the second you saw him it was all going to fade away. There was a lot that was still left unsaid between you after that fight, and you still needed to talk, but you were scared.

Chan kept checking on you throughout the day. You think he knew how worried you were to talk to Minho. As your work day was coming to a close, he walked into your office and stood on the other side of your desk with his hands in his jean’s pockets. He had a worried look on his face. You thought he said everything between you was going to be fine. You think he was also worried that this conversation with Minho could change things.

“If you need me or anything don’t think twice about calling me.”

“Chan, whatever happens just know I still want what’s between us,” you needed him to know that he was still important to you. That whatever was about to be said between you and Minho wouldn’t change anything.

“I know, (YN),” he walked over and gave you a gentle kiss on the lips as he reached down and laced his fingers with your leading you out of the office.

-&-

Walking into your apartment you shared with Minho you found him at the kitchen table with his laptop in front of him. He looked up at you with wide eyes, and closed his laptop.

“Chan said you guys talked today, and he said you needed me,” You said softly, still unsure if it was too soon for you to be making up.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath and stood up. He walked over towards you and stood about two feet away from you. “Did he tell you what’s up?”

You shook your head, you had literally no clue what was going on with Minho.

“So, Mai wasn’t actually pregnant. I guess it’s common for pregnancy tests to have false positives,” he sounded so sad and he couldn’t even look at you right then, his eyes were locked on his feet.

Your heart suddenly hurt for him, Minho had always wanted to be a father and he found out he had gotten his hopes up for no reason.

“Oh, Minho, I'm so sorry.”

He shook his head, “so when Mai told me we kind of got into a huge fight over you. She basically told me our friendship isn’t healthy, and she basically told me I had to pick her or you…” he paused and looked up at you with wide eyes. Your stomach dropped because you were worried that he was about to tell you that he picked Mai over you. “Mai and I are done. Even when I felt I might have fucked up so badly that I lost you forever. I still couldn’t risk it and not pick you.”

Your eyes started watering as you stared at him. You were just at a complete loss for words. You didn’t even know what I should say to him at that moment.

“(YN), I can’t ever take back what I said that day, I wish I fucking could. I also wish I could have opened my eyes and realized you were right in front of me all along. (YN) you are my everything and I'm sorry Mai was always such a bitch to you.”

You bit my bottom lip staring at him, wondering what you should even say to him.

“I didn’t start what I have with Chan because he was convenient,” you suddenly felt the need to defend yourself when it came to Chan.

“I just didn’t like the idea of Chan taking my place,” he sighed. “especially after you said you were in love with me. I might be a selfish asshole for thinking this, but I didn’t want you to have the same feelings for Chan.”

You looked down at the ground and sighed, “do you know how much it hurt to be in love with you and watch you just date random girls and then just suddenly get into a serious relationship with Mai?”

He shook his head and took a step closer to you, “I didn’t see what was right in front of me, but it seems like Chan wasn’t blind.”

You took a step forward and rested your hand on his cheek and stared into his blue eyes, “I didn’t choose to love you and to be honest everything would have been so much easier if I didn’t love you. I kind of wish I could go back in time and tell myself not to fall in love with you. We wouldn’t be right here if I didn’t. Everything would have been so much simpler.”

His eyes started to brim with tears as his eyes stayed locked on yours, “was I that hard to love?”

“You were too perfect to love. I was a fool to think that someone like you would ever love someone like me. Loving you has hurt me more than anything in the world, and I need to try to get over those feelings.”

He winced at your harsh words about yourself. Reaching up he rested his hand on top of yours that was still resting on his cheek, “I love you (YN).”

Tears started to fall down my cheek as I whispered, “but it’s not the same.”

“I used to not be able to see my life without you in. Like you’re my everything, and I dreamed of being able to kiss you whenever I wanted and hear you tell me you loved me. But it was all just a dream for me. It was never meant to actually happen.”

You reached up with my free hand and wiped away my tears, “this fucking suck, so much.”

“Do we ever come back from this?” he asked with his voice sounding shaking. “Because I can’t imagine my life where you aren’t my best friend. You might not ever believe me, but you’re my everything. You’re my best friend (YN), and my life doesn’t make sense without you,” his own tears slowly started falling.

“Minho,” you sighed because you couldn’t just say yes, because you weren’t exactly sure. You were still completely heartbroken by him. You dropped your hand from his cheek and just stared at him.

“What if we gave us a shot?” his voice was desperate as he reached up and took your face in both his hands. Those were the words you had dreamed of hearing since high school, but right now you didn’t want to hear him ask that.

You shook your head as he held your face as he was desperately holding on to you, “we can’t do that.”

He took a deep breath and swallowed before leaning forward and resting his forehead against yours as the tears just continued to slide down your cheek. “You have Chan now,” he said sadly as he pulled away, still holding your face.

“I really care for him a lot,” you whispered. “He’s really special to me, and he’s been there for me. I think he could be the one who puts my heart back together.”

He closed his eyes and shook his head, “I lost you, before I even had a chance to have you.”

“I think we lost each other,” you whispered. “Some things just aren’t meant to be.”

“Can I please kiss you?” he pleaded as tears slid down his cheek.

You knew you should say no that if you kissed this was just going to make everything so much worse, but you honestly needed to know if there was a spark between us.

“Yeah,” you said barely above a whisper.

Minho connected his mouth to yours and your lips moved together with a sense of desperation as he held your face in his hands. You reached forward grabbing his dress shirt pulling your bodies closer. You were clinging to him as if, if you let go you would drift apart forever. His touch was electric as your lips fought, it was a kiss filled with hunger and desperation. Your lips parted for a moment for you to both breathe before Minho continued to kiss you as if he needed you to breathe.

When you finally parted your hands were still holding onto his dress shirt as he forehead rested against yours. “Are we going to be okay one day?”

“Hopefully,” you whispered and took a slow breath. “I really want us to be able to be okay, because I’m still going to need my best friend.”

He pulled away from you and took a step back and nodded his head, “are you going to move back in?”

You nodded your head knowing that step number one to fixing everything was probably you moving back home, “yeah I’ll come back tomorrow.”

“Okay good, it’s lonely in this apartment,” he gave you a sad smile.

You leaned forward and pressed your lips to his cheek for a gentle kiss. You took a step away from him and reached for the door, “hey Minho?”

“Yeah, (YN)?”

“Are you and Chan going to be okay?”

He nodded his head, “yeah we talked today and he told me I can’t lay claims on someone I was too blind to see, and honestly he’s right. Chan and I are going to be okay. You didn’t get between us. I was the one who messed up,” he sighed.

“Okay, I’ll be home tomorrow,” you opened the door and left the apartment.

You walked the mile to Chan’s place needing to get air and clear your head. You had a lot you needed to tell Chan, and you weren’t even sure how he was going to take the fact that you and Minho had kissed, but after what just happened you felt free. That the weight on your shoulders had finally been lifted.

Walking down the hall of Chan’s apartment building, you reached into your pocket and pulled out the spare key that Chan gave you and walked inside to find him cooking dinner in the kitchen. He turned to look at you when he heard the front door open and close.

“You okay?” he asked, turning the burn off as you walked into the kitchen.

You nodded your head as you walked over and wrapped your arms around his strong torso and you let out a heavy sigh. “That was hard,” you said softly. Pulling away you looked up at him feeling suddenly guilty about your kiss with Minho. You took a deep breath before saying, “Minho and I kissed.”

He shrugged his shoulders, “you guys had a lot of emotions and a lot that needed to be said. I’m not surprised at all.”

“I’m sorry,” You shook your head just feeling terrible that you let this happen.

“You have nothing to be sorry for. So, is this now over between us?” he asked sadly.

You narrowed your eyes on him and knitted your eyebrows together, “Chan he asked me if the two of us could try being together, and I said no…” You paused and he stared at you with a confused look. “Chan, I don’t know what we are exactly, but I picked this. I want whatever we have.”

Without saying a word, he leaned forward and pressed his lips to yours for a passionate kiss. He pulled away and he took a step back.

“I think we kissed to see what we could have been, but I don’t want that anymore. Three weeks ago, it would have been a dream to have Minho tell me he wants to give us a shot, but now I have you…” You paused and gave him a smile, “Chan what we have is real and I think it’s going to be better than whatever I thought I could be with him. You saw me when I didn’t think I was worth seeing.”

He took a step towards you and pressed his lips to your forehead causing you to smile. He looked into your eyes and said, “Just so you know, I have seen you since that first moment you walked into my dorm with Minho for the first time. When you were wearing that mustard colored dress, and your hair was in that messy bun.”

Your heart raced at the fact that he remembered meeting you for the first time, “you remember that?”

He nodded his head, “yeah because I remember thinking, oh great I’m attracted to my new roommate’s girlfriend, and then I found out you were his best friend and that he was even more protective of you then I could have imagined.”

“Bang Chan you are a dream,” You smiled, reaching down and lacing your fingers with his.

“I would rather be real for you,” he said softly. “So, are you moving back into the apartment with Minho?”

You sadly nodded my head, “I’m going back tomorrow.”

“Okay so that means I’m going to enjoy every minute of having you in my bed tonight,” he said with a low tone. Your cheeks suddenly burn at the thought of all the things you were going to do.

“I was also thinking that maybe as my boyfriend you could have sleepovers at my apartment,” you suddenly felt nervous that maybe he would reject the idea of being boyfriend and girlfriend.

“As your boyfriend I like the idea of us having sleepovers,” he smirked.

Chan cooked you dinner as you looked through some emails. The moment the clock struck nine Chan told me it was bedtime.

Standing at the foot of the bed Chan was slowly stripping away your clothes. The moment you were both naked, he had you lying on your back with him lying next to you kissing your breast slowly. Your eyes were closed as you enjoyed the feeling of his lips on your skin. His hand moved to dip down into your folds. You couldn’t help but moan as his thumb stroked your clit while two fingers slowly pumped in and out of you. Biting your bottom lip, you held back a moan.

“Chan, I’m close,” you whined knowing that it wasn’t going to take much to push you over the edge.

He moved his lips up the base of your neck kissing his way up. With his lips brushing your ear he whispered, “let go for me.” His low tone sent a shiver down your spine as you hit your high. Your walls clenched his fingers as they continued to work slowly. Removing his fingers, he looked over at you and smirked, “You are literally the prettiest thing I have ever seen,” he whispered with his lips still brushing your ear. He moved onto his knees resting between your open thighs and gave himself a few pumps before he slowly slid into you. He hovered over you connecting his lips to yours for a passion filled kiss as he thrust into you over and over again incredibly slowly. Your fingers clawed at his back, almost begging for more.

“Chan,” You sighed.

“What do you want baby?” he asked with his lips ghosting yours.

“Faster please?” You begged, for more.

“Okay anything for you baby,” he connected his lips to yours for a rough kiss as he picked up the pace.

It didn’t take long for him to push you over the edge again, and he followed behind a few thrust later.

Lying in bed your naked bodies were intertwined as your head rested on his strong chest. His hand rubbed your side. You couldn’t lie, you were going to miss sharing a bed with him every night and being able to sleep naked.

“We might have to be quieter with Minho being in the room next to me,” You said with a soft laugh.

“I think we can work on that,” he leaned down and pressed his lips to your forehead. “Can I maybe take you out on a proper date on Friday after work? I mean I am your boyfriend.”

You realized since you had started this whole thing, you hadn’t ever gone on a date or anything like that. “I guess my boyfriend can take me out on a date on Friday,” you said cuddling up closer to him.

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