#It's those people who act like Valentines is too stupid to celebrate with their partner who thinks it would be nice or fun | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

cg008 · 3 years ago

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ㅤㅤㅤLove is a strange phenomenon, they said.

ㅤㅤㅤIt is said that love is something that can be seen so easily but makes one blind at the same time. It is something like a mirage, a fleeting emotion that only those who acknowledge love could truly see by themselves. From all of the references he could gather, love is something abstract that is differently perceived by every living human. They have no definite meaning in terms of intuitive aspect, only to defined as a chemical reaction of a human's brain that heightens their sensation of happiness to the point of euphoria in different circumstances— something that the android wouldn't completely comprehend by himself.

ㅤㅤㅤ"What truly is love?"

ㅤㅤㅤHank stared at the android for a solid minute, being pulled under the stupid dilemma of his childlike partner as they both fell in silence of the car. Did the boy just asked a question to him or to himself? The old man tried to read the android's mind, seeing the buzzing yellow of his LED spinning in its buffering state.

ㅤㅤㅤ"Where did that even came from?" Hank decided to pry, startling Connor from his deep analyzation of his trouble understanding a human emotion. "Damn, don't tell me that you got your ass in love already?"

ㅤㅤㅤ"No, Hank— it just came across my mind," Connor replied with a faint shake of his head, keeping his eyes on the coin he was fiddling throughout the ride on the road. "Today is Valentine's Day, a day where people celebrate their love to their significant ones? Although my archives said that it was just a mere day of honoring a Christian Martyr named Saint Valentine."

ㅤㅤㅤ"Ugh, can't believe you'd even get troubled with that sappy shit. I'd even prefer thinking that it's just a stupid celebration of someone's death," Hank shrugged while revving off the engine of his car, pulling out the keys and leaning back to the driver's seat as he pondered along with the troubled android.

ㅤㅤㅤ"Saint Valentine did fulfilled something akin to resolution of people's love, although vague even for the Roman Catholic Church to consider removing his feast day on their calendar," Connor spoke as he flipped the coin up to the air— a habit of idling action while being preoccupied by his thoughts.

ㅤㅤㅤ"Eh, that sounds troublesome. Why even bother going deep into that crap if you only want to know what love is?"

ㅤㅤㅤCatching his coin midair, Connor raised a brow and stared cluelessly to the sweating old man.

ㅤㅤㅤ"I mean— Fuck, how in the world can I even explain that shit. Humans just celebrate whenever they want, really."

ㅤㅤㅤThey both stepped out of the car, welcomed by the cold breeze of the Detroit's midnight hours.

ㅤㅤㅤ"Do you celebrate Valentine's Day, Hank?" Connor curiously inquired, earning a mocking laugh from the older man leaning on the rail of the bridge. Spending a short break on the bridge had became their daily routine after their working hours, passing out the air of their stressful works involving both cases of humans and androids alike.

ㅤㅤㅤ"Fuck no, I don't," Hank scoffed after laughing, waving a hand to the android that also leaned close to the trail. "I'm too old for that crap already."

ㅤㅤㅤ"Have you celebrated it once in your life, though?" Connor insisted with a determined expression that stilled Hank from giving another dismissive response. The old man simply shrugged.

ㅤㅤㅤ"On my younger years, sure," Hank muttered as he gazed on the bright city across the horizon. "Just an act of giving flowers or other stuffs they like. Like mini Christmas, hell."

ㅤㅤㅤ"Oh, but only goes around in a theme of love," The android nodded as he fiddled with his coin again. "Then... What do you think of 'love', Lieutenant?"

ㅤㅤㅤA long silence lingered around them, only accompanied by the quiet ticks of the coin being flung on the air.

ㅤㅤㅤLove is something that you can give and take, only that your heart and mind could receive along with the memories of those who you loved. The sight of bright smiles, flowers and chocolate with a warm hug coming from the two persons he loved the most— Hank couldn't help but to let out a long sigh. It was something you cherish close to your heart, wishing to protect those who you love at all cost.

ㅤㅤㅤHe loves Detroit, his home— Sumo, his trusted hound— his pain-on-the-ass work— and even this stupid plastic prick he was now taking care of like a naïve child.

ㅤㅤㅤ... Of course, love is a piece of shit when broken, and the Lieutenant knows it well even until now that now softened up after all of the shits that happened just recently on his life.

ㅤㅤㅤ"Love isn't just some sorts of events like that, boy," Hank shook his head and looked at the attentive android that was long observing him from the silence. "If you feel like 'loving', then it'll be your heart that would decide if you love a certain thing or not. Hell, you can even just define what love is for your own good."

ㅤㅤㅤSeeing the deepening frown knitting of the android's brows, Hank rolled his eyes and placed his arm over Connor's shoulders— pulling him on his side while giving his back a pat.

ㅤㅤㅤ"Look, it's just like how 'like' works on 'ya. You like dogs, you say— but you spoil Sumo too much that it doesn't look just a mere 'liking' at this point."

ㅤㅤㅤ"Sumo is a good dog, he deserves to be adored!" Connor exclaimed, confused of the gestures from Hank that he only stiffed his body awkwardly. "Is adoring some sorts of 'love' as well, Lieutenant?"

ㅤㅤㅤ"Yeah," Hank simply shook his head and smiled, placing his hand on top of Connor's head. "You can't just define all of the things around you, Connor. If you think it's too vague, then just let it be— just like love as well. Love got a lot of forms, after all."

ㅤㅤㅤEros, Philia, Storge, Agape, Pragma, Ludus, Mania, and Philautia— uncommon words flashed within his HUD as Connor recalled his analysis from what the older man was pertaining. It all ties down just by being 'love', so he immediately released all the tabs within his HUD. To let things as it be is also called 'love', and 'love' is something that your heart and mind could only decide.

ㅤㅤㅤHe doesn't have the same heart and mind as humans do, but Connor slowly comes into terms of what he was trying to understand.

ㅤㅤㅤ"Then, would it be better if I just say that I 'love' dogs? Love seems akin to adoration, as what you have said."

ㅤㅤㅤ"Yeah, people will get a general idea about that," Hank nodded.

ㅤㅤㅤConnor simply watched the adoring smile his superior had been sporting for a while, head tilting in wonder of what else could be running on the older man's mind. Although it seems impossible for an android like him to fully understand what 'love' truly is, maybe he could simply make his own definition of it. After all, love has a lot forms to shape into— and it would surely form even for an artificial being like him.

ㅤㅤㅤ"I think I understand it now, Hank."

ㅤㅤㅤ"Yeah? Then, tell me about it."

ㅤㅤㅤWith a small curve lifting his lips up, the Connor just closed his eyes and leaned his head on the warmth of Hank's company.

ㅤㅤㅤ"Love is surely strange in its own ways, but it is also meant to appreciate the things that makes you feel 'alive'."

ㅤㅤㅤ"... Well said," Hank proudly chuckled and ruffled the Android's hair. "You're getting a grip on it now, boy."

ㅤㅤㅤ"Happy Valentine's Day, then... Hank," Connor smiled and hugged the older man back, one of the gestures where he felt 'love' that also happens to be the same one he had received after all of the hardships they've faced together.

ㅤㅤㅤAmused with the conclusion, Hank also returned the hug with a chuckle. It's been a long while since he had a bright smile with a hug as a gift for Valentine's, after all.

ㅤㅤㅤ"Yeah... Happy Valentine's to you as well, son."

#Detroit: Become Human #DBH #RK800 #DBH Connor #DBH Hank Anderson #im crying like the dorky father/son deserve everything ok brb gonna cry

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mackinmacki · 4 years ago

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Be Mine, Valentine (White Rose Week #3)

Fandom: RWBY

Pairing: White Rose

Word Count: 6871

Rating: G

Synopsis: Weiss and Ruby figure out how to do Valentine’s Day together.

Prompt: Valentine

Links: FFN | AO3

Notes: I’ve made my edits, added the links, and changed the title, because it made no sense.

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"So, Valentine's Day is around the corner, huh? Bet you're pretty excited about buying some chocolates for your crush." Team RWBY had separated into pairs, in order to diversify their training. Weiss and Yang had gone to the training room to practice hand to hand combat, which doubled as strengthening Weiss's arms. Of course, Yang being Yang, it hadn't taken her long to start trying to distract both of them with unnecessary topics like 'Valentine's Day'.

"First off, I do not have a crush on anyone. I do not know where you get such ridiculous ideas." Weiss huffed as she threw another punch at the punching bag Yang was holding. She understood that hand to hand combat was important, because one couldn't always rely on having their weapon at the ready. However, her body wasn't built for such things. At that point, she was sweating from her exertions, which didn't benefit someone as prim and proper as her. Her clothes were becoming soaked through with it, sticking to her cold, sweaty arms and legs. She definitely needed a shower the moment they were done. "Secondly, we are training to become huntresses. Where do you find the time to celebrate such trivialities?"

"On the day of that triviality," Yang replied, smirking as she watched Weiss wipe sweat from her forehead. She was close to making her teammate take a break, because otherwise she would force herself to continue until she collapsed. Weiss sure was lucky she had someone as cool and thoughtful as Yang looking out for her. They weren't Freezerbros for nothing. "Life isn't entirely just us training to be huntresses. We're allowed to have fun, ya know?"

"I am aware," she replied tersely, throwing a fist at the punching bag. Her punches were becoming weaker, her breathing noticeably heavier. "But what's the point of Valentine's Day anyway? It's just a day for people in relationships to throw their happiness in the face of those who are without companions." That had come out more bitter than she'd meant it to, and she quickly deviated from that path. "In case you weren't aware, I do not have a partner, nor a crush to make a fool of myself towards. This sort of holiday is more for you."

"You do have a partner, though: Ruby." Yang pulled the bag back, out of Weiss's reach. By the way the poor girl looked like she was about to collapse, it was clearly time to take a breather. She let the bag swing back and forth as it tried to come to a stop, beckoning Weiss over to the nearby wall. "C'mon Weiss, time to take a breather. Have some water before we get back to practice."

"She is my partner, not my partner." Weiss pursed her lips, realizing how strange that sounded. Sighing, she followed Yang over to the wall, where she watched as her teammate flopped down on her butt and popped open the tab top on her water bottle. She waterfalled it, water dripping down her chin and onto her tank top before she offered it to Weiss. "Thank you." She took the water and drank it with more prose, slowly sitting down next to Yang.

"You can be real with me, you know?" Yang slung a sweaty arm around Weiss's shoulders, which made her instinctively recoil. "We're Freezerbros, right?" Weiss rolled her eyes at the cutesy nickname: a bastardization of their duo attack name that Ruby had come up with. "You can tell me that you like Ruby. I'm not gonna be mad, promise."

"If you think I care about how you would react to something like that, you ought to think otherwise." This was a good time to not mention that she had a few stray thoughts concerning Yang using her strength to shatter her like one of her summons. "I really don't understand why you think I have feelings for Ruby. What could have possibly made you believe that to be the truth?" She saw a glimmer appear in Yang's eyes: one that showed a challenge had been thrown down, and she was ready to compete.

"Let's see..." Sticking out her hand, Yang started to count off the reasons on her fingers. "You act like being around Ruby is such a bother, but you're constantly watching over her whenever she gets in over her head. I've caught you staring at her when she isn't looking multiple times. For example, you were watching her talk to Blake about what the two of them were going to do just this morning, with the most longing look I've ever seen."

"That... That is not what happened!" Weiss's blush said otherwise. As pale as she was, when she grew embarrassed, her blush took over her entire face. It flooded with a deep red, letting Yang know everything she needed to. "I just happened to be staring in the direction she was standing. I was not staring at her, and you would do well to remember that!" She could deflect all she wanted, but her blush told the true story, and she couldn't hide that.

"Whenever we're training, you're always looking over at Ruby rather than at Blake or I. Honestly, I feel hurt." She didn't seem hurt, though, grinning all the while. Weiss made sure to stick her tongue out at her, like a mature young adult. "You talk about her all the time, and I mean all the time. I'm surprised you don't even realize how often her name is on your lips."

"I... do not know..." The fact that she was malfunctioning right in front of Yang almost made her feel bad for being so blunt. However, Weiss was a blunt girl herself. Surely she could take her own medicine. She coughed into her fist, trying to straighten herself up. "Yang, I do not have a crush on your sister. I do not talk excessively about her, nor do I look out for her any more than another partner would do. By that logic, Pyrrha and Nora must have crushes on their partners, and I find that hard to believe." Suddenly, Yang yanked her arm away from her shoulder, having taken a drink of water and then spit it out all over the bottle and the floor. "What the hell, Yang?!"

"Bwahaha, oh my... You... Bwahaha!" She lost control of herself, spilling water all over the floor as she convulsed with laughter. For a full minute, she couldn't answer any of Weiss's questions: the way her face switched between concerned and annoyed just made it better. Finally, she was able to speak while flat on her back, her shirt now drenched in water. "Did you just say that it's hard to believe that Pyrrha and Nora have crushes on their partners?"

"What's so funny about that?" Blushing deeper, Weiss shrunk back as the realization of what Yang was trying to say struck her. "No way... Oh come on! You can't tell me that Pyrrha has a crush on Jaune!" Yang just grinned at her, telling her all she needed to know. "Unbelievable... She could do so much better." Sighing, she ran a hand through her hair, feeling overheated. "W-Well, I don't care how they feel about their partners. It's completely different between Ruby and myself. We're just friends!"

"Uh huh, just like Blake and I, right?" She was sure that if she made Weiss blush any more, the blood might actually burst from her cheeks. "Look, this Valentine's Day, just call me Cupid Xiao Long, alright? I'm gonna get Pyrrha and Nora to confess to their partners, and I'll do the same with you before the day is done. Everybody will be happy, and you three will thank me. Perhaps with a steak dinner or two. Your treat, of course."

"In your dreams." Weiss rolled her eyes, standing up and punching her fist into her palm. "Now come on. Are we here to train or gossip about things that you made up inside that silly little mind of yours?" Grunting, Yang got up on her feet and shrugged her shoulders, heading over towards the punching bag. It didn't matter how much Weiss pretended that she wasn't interested in Ruby. Everyone within a twenty mile radius could see the truth, and she was going to show Weiss that fact, even if she had to drag her kicking and screaming towards it.

As for Weiss, she resumed punching the bag Yang was holding, if only to ignore the embarrassment that had grown like weeds inside of her. There was no way Yang was right. She absolutely did not have feelings for Ruby. Just because her heart felt like it did weird things whenever she was around didn't mean anything. She was not going to give Yang the satisfaction of being right. Her and Ruby were just friends, nothing more. Besides, she was positive that Ruby felt the same way. If Ruby had anything close to a crush on her, she surely would have noticed.

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"Ugh, I can't believe Valentine's Day snuck up on me like this!" Ruby pressed her forehead against the nearest tree, threatening to bonk the two of them together. Luckily, Blake was there to keep her from doing anything too stupid. "How did I not realize what month it was?! I was so focused on trying to be a good leader, and all of the Grimm attacks, and it just..." She shrugged her shoulders helplessly, pulling her head away to look at Blake. "I've gotta figure out what to do, and fast!"

"I think you're taking this too seriously," Blake responded, arms crossed as she watched Ruby run the gamut of emotional distress. The two of them had only been about halfway through their training when Blake had decided to put a stop to it. Ruby was clearly distracted, and they weren't going to get anything done unless she let out what was going on. It had been easier than she had expected, to be honest: the moment she put a halt to the training and asked Ruby why she was so distracted, everything came out. "This is Weiss we're talking about here. She has the romantic range of an Ursa."

"But she's rich, Blake! And cultured too. She probably has all these expectations of what Valentine's Day should be, and I don't know if I can fulfill them." Sighing, Ruby dropped down onto the grass, leaning against the tree. Truth be told, she'd had feelings for Weiss for quite some time now. It had happened so naturally that she didn't even question it. She just knew that Weiss was the one for her. Now, her being the one for Weiss? That was the tricky part.

"Yes, but have you ever seen her show any ounce of interest in those romantic trappings?" It was hard to believe that she was involved in this conversation. As much as she didn't want to admit it, she had her feet in Weiss's camp on this one. Valentine's Day wasn't that important to her. Even though she had a partner, having one specific day to shower each other in love was superfluous. It did make sense that the two sisters would feel differently, though. They were alike in more ways than one might expect. "Besides, she already likes you. You doing anything for her will be fine."

"Wait, what?!" Ruby shot up like a rocket, staring at Blake with wide, disbelieving eyes. "She likes me?!" Suddenly she was right in front of Blake, grabbing her shoulders with a pleading expression. "Blake, how could she like me?! I'm the weird kid who knocked over all her stuff and stole her leadership role! There's no way! I mean, sure, she's become nicer to me over these last few months, but..." She scratched her head, then started furiously running her fingers through her hair. "For real?! Weiss Schnee likes me?!"

"Do you know any other Weisses?" Blake replied dryly. Though she had grown used to the antics of her teammates over their time together, she still often felt the struggle to best help them. Being a psychiatrist or a sounding board wasn't something she ever grew up being. She could barely understand Yang sometimes, and she loved her. Trying to figure out how to tie together the unnecessary dance Ruby and Weiss were always going through took less shots from Gambol Shroud than she was used to. "Have you really not noticed all the times she's openly stared at you?"

"Well, no..." Ruby tapped her fingers together awkwardly, a hint of pink on her cheeks. "But I've stared at her all the time! I would've noticed if she did too, right?" Blake just stared impassively at her, which told her all she needed to know. "Oh... But, I... We..." She sputtered out multiple attempts at a proper sentence, but kept failing. "Me and Weiss? She likes me? I-I have to do something huge for her, then!"

"You really aren't listening to me." Sighing, Blake rubbed her temples. This was a lot of trouble for a relationship that she was sure would end up highly combustible. Truthfully, she had never understood Ruby's infatuation for Weiss. It had always been patently obvious, but... why? Yes, Weiss had become a nicer, more understanding person over their time as teammates, but she was still a Schnee, no matter how many changes she tried to make. Her and Ruby were just such different people.

"I gotta get started!" Ruby shouted, inadvertently admitting that she wasn't listening. "We'll practice later, okay? I promise! I gotta figure out what to do for Weiss, though! She'll want to date me for sure after this!" In a flash, she was gone, leaving a few rose petals in her wake. Blake just sighed, flicking a petal that was floating down in front of her.

"How are we going to survive these two trying to ask each other out?"

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'This is ridiculous!' Weiss was in the shower, washing off the sweat and grime from her and Yang's intense training session. Standing underneath the shower head, she was stewing from what Yang had told her while they were taking a break. 'She doesn't know anything! I don't have feelings for Ruby!' Yang thought she was so smart, and that she knew everything. Well this time, she was dead wrong. Just because she thought that she had caught Weiss staring at Ruby a few times didn't amount to anything.

Okay, so maybe she was finding herself more respectful towards Ruby in recent times. Despite her original hang-ups, Ruby had proven herself to be a competent leader. While she didn't have the leadership style Weiss would have, it did seem to work for her. All four of them had become some kind of family, as odd as that may sound. Sure, she and Ruby were closer than she was with Blake or Yang, but that was just because they were partners. It was only natural that they would be more comfortable with each other.

She ran her fingers through her hair, trying to shake the words that Yang had said out of her brain, but she couldn't. That obnoxious woman was now making her revisit her prior interactions with Ruby in a new light, and she didn't like what she was coming to realize. She couldn't stop thinking of Ruby now: the way she led the team, the way she threw herself into everything she did, the way her eyes shined when she smiled-

'Stop it!' she scolded herself, stepping out of the way of the water. This entire concept was ridiculous, and she was being ridiculous for even entertaining it. Ruby was her partner on their team, and that was all. There was nothing going on between them in terms of romance. They didn't like each other like Yang thought they did. Besides, there was no way someone like Ruby would like someone like her. Especially after all the times she had treated Ruby so poorly in the past.

Wait, what was she saying? Was she feeling guilty? Sure, she had been a bit hard to handle in the past, but she had definitely improved since them. She had told Ruby early on that she would be the best teammate Ruby ever had, and she felt that she had lived up to her side of the bargain. There was no reason to feel any sort of negativity towards how she acted in the past.

Then why did she feel like it didn't make any sense for Ruby to like her? She placed a hand on her chest, feeling her heart beating faster just from the thought of her team leader. That made her frown, wondering just what in the world was going on. Yang couldn't possibly have a point. She didn't like Ruby, right? At least, not like Yang was saying she did. Sure, she liked her as a partner, and as a friend, but more than that? Blasphemous.

And yet, now all she was thinking about was Ruby. She was the only thing on her mind. Maybe, just maybe she'd had a few stray thoughts about Ruby. Just a few, mind you! It wasn't wrong to think of other people, even if it wasn't something to be expected of her. She was too much of an aloof princess to be thinking of other people, especially in ways that would make her blush from embarrassment. Which was why she absolutely was not thinking of someone as cute as Ruby-

Oh, who was she kidding? Shutting her eyes, she slid down onto the shower floor, hiding her head on her knees as the water kept falling around her. It was a terrible thing to admit, but... Yang was right, dammit! She did like Ruby! More than was appropriate, and more than she should. How long had she held such feelings for Ruby? She honestly wasn't sure, as she'd been so adamant on denying the truth that her mind had completely wiped out any exact dates. All she knew was that it had been a problem for longer than she cared to admit.

The truth was, she held back on those feelings for a bigger reason than having Yang tease her endlessly for them. She had come to realize just how wonderful and innocent of a soul Ruby was. Of course, that might have been because she made it into Beacon two years early, but she knew that it was more than that. She just lived her entire life with an incredible amount of optimism: more than Weiss had ever seen in her life. The way she had taken Weiss on as a partner and dealt with all of her crap for so long was impressive, to say the least. She knew for a fact that she didn't have so much patience. How many times had she lost her temper with Ruby and said something she didn't mean? Too many times to count. In all of those moments, never once had Ruby raised her voice at her or admonished her in return. She had patience well beyond her years, and cared so much more than could possibly fit inside her body.

To think of herself having something resembling a romantic relationship with Ruby was laughable, but not because of the reasons she would say out loud. Not for any of the reasons she would think of either, when she was trying to strong-arm her brain into ignoring the truth. In reality, she didn't deserve Ruby. How could someone who had been so rude to Ruby turn around and say she deserved her? It was a laughable concept. Honestly, there were so many problems with her thinking that she could be in a relationship with Ruby that it made her laugh out loud. That laughter was lost in the sea of tears that were falling from her eyes, however.

She stayed in the shower crying for longer than she intended. It was unusual for her to zone out like she had, but when she returned to reality, she was momentarily confused about where she was. When she realized that the shower was still running, she stood up to turn it off. Then she just stood there, staring at the floor with an empty expression while water dripped off her body and down the drain.

For the first time in her life, she needed to talk to Yang. She needed advice from Yang. Admitting what she was going to admit was going to be embarrassing: worse, it would be terrifying. However, if she wanted to stop the crazy thoughts that were swirling around her head in that moment, she knew Yang was the only person she could talk to. Stepping out of the shower she wrapped a towel around her body and her hair, tightening them up before walking slowly into the dorm room.

"Wow, even for you that was a long shower," Yang remarked, looking up from her scroll. However, her teasing petered off when she saw Weiss standing there in a towel with a dejected look on her face. "Hey, uh, you alright?" She expected Weiss to say that she was, and that she needed to mind her own business. When she gave her head a slight shake, that was when Yang knew something was wrong.

Immediately she was on her feet, heading over to put an arm around Weiss's shoulder. "Hey, hey, what's wrong, Weiss?" She guided Weiss over to Ruby's bed, where the two of them sat down next to each other. While waiting for Weiss to respond, she gently rubbed her shoulders, trying to make her feel more comfortable. This was Weiss she was dealing with. Something major was obviously going on for her to be in such a state in front of other people.

"You were right," Weiss whispered, unable to look Yang in the eye. "I like Ruby. I've tried so hard to not think about those feelings, and they suddenly ate me up inside while I was taking my shower." She clutched her towel to her body, feeling tears threatening to come out again. The last thing she wanted to do in that moment was cry in front of someone, even if she was spilling her secrets to them. "It's terrible, Yang..."

"How is that terrible?" Yang blinked in confusion, wondering what the hell Weiss was talking about. Hearing that Weiss did have feelings for her sister was great! She had been right, and since she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that Ruby felt the same, her job as Cupid was going to be super easy. "That's great! Think about it: it's Valentine's Day soon. That'll be the perfect day for you to confess your feelings to Ruby. She's going to be so happy!"

"I doubt it," she scoffed, shaking her head sadly. "After the way I've treated her, there's no way she would feel the same about me."

"What are you talking about? Of course she likes you!" Yang was being thrown for a loop. No, several loops, like one of those roller coaster-building simulators she played on the school computer as a kid. Hearing the complete lack of confidence in Weiss's voice was foreign to her. It was like someone else was talking, and using Weiss like a ventriloquist dummy.

"I didn't say she didn't. I'm saying she won't feel the same about me as I do about her." Weiss shrugged off Yang's arm, standing up to head back to the bathroom. "She likes me as a friend and as a teammate. That's all I can expect from her, and I should be able to respect that." As she was walking away, Yang just watched her in complete disbelief. She suddenly jumped up and ran after Weiss, grabbing the bathroom door before she could lock herself in.

"Woah, woah, hold up! You really think Ruby doesn't like you like that?"

"I wouldn't have said it if I didn't mean it."

"That's debatable, but anyway, you're wrong. Ruby does like you. She likes you a whole lot. Honestly, the two of you are the last to know that you like each other." It was a wonder either of those girls were as smart as they were. When it came to picking up on romantic cues from their literal team partner, they sure were dumb. Being Cupid wasn't as easy as she imagined. She needed a long vacation after Valentine's Day.

"Did you not hear anything that I said? There is nothing about me that she could possibly be interested in. You've been around me long enough to know how difficult I am, haven't you?" She was huffy enough that she somehow avoided the embarrassment of admitting that she was a difficult person to get along with. Ironically, she was being difficult about being difficult. That was just the way a Schnee worked.

"Well, yes. You are the most difficult person I've ever met." She laughed at how Weiss glared at her, as if she hadn't been the one to bring up the topic. "It doesn't matter what I think, though. I'm not the one trying to get with you. That's all Rubes, and she is definitely into you. I promise you, if you ask her out on Valentine's Day, she'll say yes. That's a Yang Xiao Long promise, and those are ironclad, my lady."

"I'm sure they are." Weiss rolled her eyes, still holding doubts about Yang's words. However, it did give her enough doubt towards her own doubt to make her wonder if she should take that advice. Maybe she should actually do something for Ruby for Valentine's Day. There was a first time for everything, after all. If she got rejected, though? If Yang was wrong? She would be laughed out of Beacon. "Can I go dry off or what?"

"Sure, sure," Yang laughed, stepping aside to let Weiss into the bathroom. "Think about it, Weiss!" Weiss just rolled her eyes and shut the door, making sure to lock it before she set about getting fully dried off. Now she couldn't stop thinking about what Yang had said. Ruby liked her? As in, she really liked her? That seemed too incredulous to believe, and yet Yang had said it without a hint of teasing. It was one of those moments where she was being serious, and it made Weiss question if her doubts were wrong. Maybe Ruby actually did like her. If she did, then wouldn't she be a fool for not at least attempting to ask her out?

What if Yang was wrong, though? Or at least, what if she was overstating things? If she tried this on Valentine's Day of all days, and she was rejected, she would never live it down. Even if only Ruby and herself knew the truth, she'd be driven to insanity thinking about how mortifying her life had become. Yang had seemed so sure, though... Augh, this was so confusing! Why did romance even exist?

She leaned against the sink, staring at her reflection and sighing deeply. This was going to take some figuring out, and she didn't have much time to do it.

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'I can't believe I'm doing this.' Weiss was walking towards the dorms, trying to swallow the lump that had formed in her throat. It was Valentine's Day, and she had finished up one last practice of her glyphs. She had come up with this grand plan to show Ruby just how much she meant to her, and she had gone out of her way to make sure everything would go off without a hitch. That didn't make her any less nervous, though.

'I can't believe I'm doing this!' Ruby was jogging out of the dorms, too excited to take things at a regular pace. She had come up with this great idea for how to ask Weiss to be her valentine, and it felt romantic while still having her own personal charm. Her entire being was vibrating with excitement over what could happen and nervousness over being rejected. Blake had convinced her that her feelings were mutual, though, so she was ready to go for broke that day.

As it turned out, the two of them were inadvertently heading right for each other. They saw each other across the courtyard, both of them stopping with wide eyes. The two of them stood in place, as if waiting for the other to make a move. Eventually, they just decided that it was pointless to wait, which meant they ended up walking towards each other again at the same time.

"Ruby," Weiss greeted courteously, feeling her drive to speak her mind falling apart. Staring into those wide, bright silver eyes, she felt like she could see everything she admired about Ruby on display, and it was blinding. It made her feel as if all of her faults were being exposed, proving that there was no way she could ever deserve someone like her.

"Hey Weiss," Ruby responded awkwardly, scratching her head. "I, uh..." She swallowed nervously, attempting to shake herself out of those feelings. "I wanted to show you something, if you weren't too busy. I mean, if you are, that's okay. I can show you another time. Even though it's Valentine's Day, and it's kinda a Valentine's Day thing..." She just kept rambling and rambling, but Weiss was focused on Ruby's mentioning that she wanted to show her something for Valentine's Day. Could it really be true?

"Ruby, if there's something you wanted to give to me for Valentine's Day, wouldn't it be best to not wait until Valentine's Day is over?" She found herself smirking slightly when she saw realization cross Ruby's face. "Besides, I... I also have something that I wanted to show you." Now the smirk was gone, and she was feeling just as awkward as Ruby.

"Is it for Valentine's Day?" There was so much hope in Ruby's voice. Weiss could only nod, her vocal chords deciding they didn't want to work anymore. That made Ruby's eyes light up, and her entire demeanor changed. "Oh, oh goodness, oh, okay, okay! Well, can I show you mine first? I promise it's worthwhile! I mean, I hope it's worthwhile. You can tell me if you don't like it. It's okay if you don't-"

"Ruby, you're rambling again." Somehow, it actually made her feel better to hear Ruby going off the rails. At least she wasn't the only one struggling to get the right words out. "Yes, you can show me whatever it is you have." There was a worry that, if Ruby's gift was so much better than her own, she would be outstaged before getting to show what she had. Though, if she went first, and then Ruby blew her out of the water afterwards, she'd still be in the same boat.

"Okay! Well then, uh... I need you to hold onto my hand." Weiss stared at her skeptically, which she seemed to have expected. "I know it's weird, but I need to use my semblance, and it'll only work if both of us are moving together." She held out her hand, looking Weiss right in the eyes. "Do you trust me?" Well, when she put it like that, how was she supposed to say otherwise?

"Of course I trust you." Rolling her eyes, she grabbed Ruby's hand and held on tight. "You owe me a new wardrobe if I throw up." Ruby giggled, both of them knowing that Weiss wouldn't follow through on that threat. Squeezing Weiss's hand, Ruby gave her one last reassuring look before activating her semblance.

Suddenly, the world was passing them by like someone had smashed the fast forward button. Everything in the courtyard was a blur, flying around so fast that Weiss was forced to close her eyes. She kept them closed even after the world stopped spinning, which meant that Ruby had to gently tap her shoulder before she would open them again.

When she opened her eyes, they immediately widened. Floating in the air above them was a heart, created out of red and white petals. As the petals slowly floated down to the ground, she looked over at Ruby. She was practically bursting at the seams, trying to see whether or not Weiss actually liked it.

"Ruby, I..." She was fascinated by the white petals dancing along with Ruby's normal red petals. Was that why she needed her: to get those specific petals? "It's beautiful..." She was in awe of what Ruby had created. Her semblance had always been useful, but she hadn't expected to see it be used for something so artistic. It was making her heart thump loudly.

"Really? I'm glad you think so!" There was a blush on Ruby's face, which was a rare sight to see. Normally she was fine with anything she did, even if it embarrassed her. "I wanted to do something special for you, but I didn't know what to get you. I mean, you're rich and all, and you can have anything you want! This was my best idea for something that you might not have." She tapped her foot on the ground, looking at Weiss hopefully.

"I assure you that I don't need anything special." She shook her head fondly, turning to watch the petals continue to fall. They hit the ground and started drifting away on the breeze. "You're right, though: I am rich, and I can get anything I want, so... it's nice to receive something that only you can give me." She started to blush, but she felt compelled to keep speaking. "It's actually not important to me what it is that you give me. It's just... important that it comes from you."

"Oh, well then, I guess that was a pretty good gift, then." Ruby giggled, blushing deeper. "I was hoping you'd like it, and that it'd make you want to be my Valentine." Something Weiss had come to notice about Ruby was that when she was bored or nervous, she would fidget in place. The more she would fidget, the more bored or nervous she was. At that moment, she was shaking so much, it looked like she was about to disappear in a blur. "I-If you want to, of course!"

It was hard to believe what she was hearing. After all those days suffering through her insecurities, wondering if Ruby really would want to be with someone like her, it turned out she wasn't the only one in such a mood. Not only did Ruby want to be her Valentine, but she was nervous about her saying no. Out of all the ridiculous thoughts... She couldn't believe how it had come to this.

"Unbelievable..." When she noticed Ruby was staring at her, she shook her head and prepared to put her own plan into action. "Ruby, rather than answering that, I think it would be better if I showed you what I wanted to give you. Is that alright?" Ruby nodded, suddenly mute. It was cute in a way. "Alright, please stand back." Doing as she was told, Ruby gave her room to work. She pulled out Myrtenaster and started her summoning.

A glyph formed beneath her as she stuck her sword into it. Ruby watched with wide eyes as an icy knight appeared in front of her, holding what appeared to be a bouquet of flowers. The knight bent down on one knee, offering the flowers to her. She took them, stunned into silence. They were cool to the touch, but she didn't mind. All she could do was continue staring at the icy flowers in her hands.

"Woah... That's incredible!" She was positively beaming, smiling brightly around the knight at Weiss. "That was awesome, Weiss! I didn't know you could summon this kinda thing!" She put the flowers up to her nose and sniffed them. They smelled like ice. "I thought you could only summon things that you defeated."

"That's true..." She started to sweat internally, deciding it was best to not mention how she had demolished an entire garden of flowers the day before in order to get that summon to work. "B-But anyway, I wasn't sure what to get you either. I wanted to give you something that was special, but I've never done this kind of thing before." If she wasn't careful, she was going to start rambling like Ruby did. "I hope you appreciate the effort." Wait, that sounded rude. "That didn't come out like I meant it to..."

"It's okay, Weiss," Ruby giggled, stepping past the knight to stand in front of Weiss. "I really like the flowers, but I like that they came from you more." She couldn't stop staring at Weiss, which let her see that Weiss couldn't either. That was what gave her the confidence to say what she wanted to say. "So, does that mean you want to be my Valentine, Weiss?"

"Yes. I would love nothing more than to be your Valentine." Smiling, Weiss let her summon dissipate. The knight disappeared, as well as the flowers in Ruby's hands. However, the cool feeling still remained tingling on her skin. Both of their gifts had disappeared on the wind, but the sights remained imprinted on their memories. "If you will be my Valentine as well."

"Yes!" Ruby grabbed Weiss and pulled her into a tight hug, surprising her when she lifted her off the ground. "Yes yes yes! I want to be your Valentine, Weiss!" She started to spin Weiss around, having a deceptive amount of strength in those arms. That's what happened when she lugged around a heavy metal scythe as a weapon.

"Ruby! Put me down this instant!" She was finally put down after another couple of spins, and she made sure to glower at Ruby for that. However, she couldn't stay mad at her for too long. After all, they were officially Valentines. That was something she hadn't believed could ever be true just that morning.

"So, now that we're Valentines... what do we do?" Still nervous despite their current status as Valentines, Ruby was bouncing from foot to foot, as if she was trying to get some quick cardio in while they spoke.

"We don't have to do anything. Isn't it just enough that we're together?" Weiss smoothed down her skirt, rolling her eyes at Ruby's wild behavior. "Besides, I don't think either of us know what we're supposed to do now that we've told each other how we feel."

"Well, I can think of one thing." Ruby smiled, suddenly looking very shy. It didn't suit her at all. "Maybe, now that we're Valentines and all, we could maybe... kiss?" They both blushed one after the other, with Ruby realizing what she had just asked and Weiss realizing what had been asked of her.

"I suppose that would be a good way of consummating us being Valentines." She couldn't stop blushing, not wanting to admit that she really just wanted to kiss Ruby, regardless of what day it was. Her lips looked so inviting... "If you're going to kiss me, then hurry up and do it."

"Yes ma'am!" Ruby put her hands on Weiss's shoulders and kissed her, not even thinking about what she was doing. Of course, Weiss was overthinking things, and she didn't reciprocate at first. All she could do was think of the fact that Ruby's lips were on hers. She was actually kissing Ruby. They were Valentines, Ruby liked her, and she was kissing her. This couldn't be real, could it?

It felt real, though. There was no doubt that the soft, pliable lips pressed against her own were Ruby's. That was when she finally kissed her back, letting her hands fall to Ruby's hips as they both got lost in each other's lips. They didn't pull away until they both were losing their breath. Gasping for air, they looked in each other's eyes, neither of them able to deny the truth in their gazes. They both really did like each other, and there wasn't a need to worry anymore. At least, not about starting a relationship, anyway.

"So, shall we go back to the dorm, Valentine?" Ruby giggled, loving the way that sounded on the tip of her tongue. It made her feel a tingling sensation on her lips, and she wanted to say it again and again. So of course, she did. "Valentine. Valentine..."

"Yes yes, I think we get the picture." Weiss cut her off, blushing somewhat. She was smiling, though, happy to hear those words coming from Ruby's mouth. It made everything feel more real. If there had been any doubts about what she was to Ruby, they were gone in that moment. Ruby wanted to be her Valentine, and she found herself believing her a hundred percent. "Yes, let's return to the dorm, Valentine."

"Eeee!" Squealing excitedly, Ruby took Weiss's hand and headed back towards the dorms. Rolling her eyes fondly, Weiss followed her, holding onto her hand the entire way. Neither of them felt like letting go, even if some of their fellow hunters and huntresses saw them. It would be quite the gossip, they were sure, but in that moment, neither of them cared. Today was Valentine's Day, and that meant it was just about the two of them. What other people thought didn't matter.

#White Rose Week #RWBY #White Rose #Weiss Schnee #Ruby Rose #Bumbleby #Yang Xiao Long #Blake Belladonna #My Writing

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h0llyalexander · 4 years ago

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sex+romance headcanons! - ALL :P

🌟 What is my muse’s sexual/romantic orientation?

“I’m straight, obviously. Why would you ask me that? Are you hitting on me? Because I’m not gay.” 💦 At what age did my muse lose their virginity?

(Answered in this ask.)

😘 Would my muse have sex on the first date?

“Ew, no. I’m not a whore.”

(Nvm about her having sex with random lesbians on the beach that she just met 5 minutes ago, that never happened.)

😊 Would my muse ever ask someone on a date?

“No. I’m not that desperate.”

(Although she will heavily hint at it and bother someone with comments like ‘what does a girl have to do to get asked out?’ until the person gets so annoyed they ask her out on a date.)

👍 Does my muse prefer to be asked on a date, or would they rather do the asking?

(She thinks she’s supposed to wait until someone asks her out so she’ll just say everything she can to steer them in that direction, without actually asking them straight up.)

😉 What are my muse’s fetishes/kinks?

“What are you, some kinda degenerate?”

(She would probably consider her lesbianism a ‘kink’, since her parents/sister taught her it’s not a real/valid sexuality. But she’d never admit to having it, of course.)

💬 When did my muse go on their first date?

“My first ‘official’ date was when I was fourteen. It was sort of a double date with my sister and her crush, and his best friend. It was alright.”

💯 What is my muse’s ideal date?

“Something romantic. Maybe going to an expensive restaurant and eating something fancy, and then going dancing. He should dress nice, and bring flowers. And give me at least three days in advance to prepare because I need to find a nice dress.” (She thinks she’ll enjoy it as long as it’s something expensive.)

💗 Has my muse ever been in love?

“I dunno. What kind of a lame question is that?” (No.)

👠 What was my muse’s last serious relationship like?

“Oh...well, it was pretty good, you know...he was a real gentleman. Lots of dates or whatever. And he was rich, so...” (Her last boyfriend was Heather’s ex, he was not rich and kind of a fuckboy. She didn’t really like him that much, but she dated him to get back at her sister for calling her a loser at school. Ahh, sisterhood...)

👰 Would my muse ever get married?

“Only if he buys me a nice ring. If he doesn’t do that, we are d o n e. Oh, and he can’t propose to me after I just woke up, either. I look terrible in the morning.” (Tbh her main motivation for getting married would probably be because her sister got married and she wants to upstage her. Or because her sister is getting married and she wants to have a double wedding.)

🌼 Would my muse prefer a big wedding or a small wedding?

“Are you kidding? Go big or go home! Okay, picture this...we’re at like, a beautiful venue, right? Like an open air, castle top type place. And there’s gold tablecloths and carpeting, and beautiful lights spanning above the tables, and there’s a fountain with lights in it and a big beautiful buffet with all whole-food dishes and a big bouquet in the middle. And oh, I want a violinist to play music at my wedding, but it can only be songs that I know. Nothing too old or boring, I want my wedding to be fun.” (Fun, aka expensive.)

🍬 Is my muse a sub, dom, or switch?

(Probably switch.)

🏩 What was my muse’s first time like?

(Answered here.)

🎆 Is my muse into monogamy?

“If you’re with me, you’re mine and you better not cheat or I’ll make you regret it.” (She doesn’t share.)

💕 Would my muse ever be in a polyamorous relationship?

(See previous question.)

🔥 Would my muse ever be up for a threesome?

“I don’t do that.”

(I actually have a headcanon where she almost had a threesome with Heather because Heather wanted to impress her boyfriend by giving him a threesome with her and her sister, but Holly refused to do it.)

👮 Has my muse ever had sex in public?

“Did that Russell guy tell you that? Whoever told you that, they were lying. I would never.”

(Well except for that one time on the beach. And in the ocean. And the public toilet thing, but clearly that doesn’t count...)

💔 What was my muse’s first heartbreak?

“Pffft...nobody breaks my heart.”

(Her sister, probably. Not in a romantic sense, but in the sense that she wanted her sister’s approval when she was younger and she never got it and it broke her heart.)

💑 What are my muse’s requirements for a potential partner?

“First of all, you have to have a job. A good job, not one of those jobs at McDonalds. He has to have real money. He has to be tall, and know how to act around a lady. He should give me gifts and do what I ask, and always remember our anniversary. He can’t cheat, obviously, and if we’re together long term he better propose within three years.” (Her classism really shows here smh. Looking down at people who work at McDonalds, not cool. But she’s privileged as fuck financially, as is her sister. What’s funny though is that even if she found this type of guy, she wouldn’t even like him that much. She basically described Scott, minus the tall part, and she doesn’t like Scott at all.)

💋 How many people has my muse slept with?

“Oh my God, you did not just ask me that.”

(She thinks it’s unladylike to tell people, but she’s probably slept with like...30 guys? Mostly to compete with her sister lol. Only one girl tho.)

👀 Is my muse the type to sleep around?

“No I don’t! Oh my God, shut up. I’m not some sort of skank. I’ve only ever slept with my boyfriends, and there aren’t even that many.”

(Yes.)

👎 Would my muse ever cheat on their partner?

“Only the ones that deserved it.”

(They probably didn’t. Some of them cheated on her too, but most of them did not and she still cheated on them if it helped her in some way.)

😳 What was my muse’s worst romantic/sexual relationship?

“Oh God, there was this guy named Danny and he was just the worst...like, he had no idea how to have sex with a woman, he would just act like he was humping an inanimate object. And he was so stupid, too. Like this one time I was on my period so I told him to go to the store and get me some pads, and he came back with knee pads. Like what the fuck?”

💲Would my muse ever date/marry/sleep with someone because they were rich?

“I mean, obviously not, they have to be handsome too.”

(Yes.)

👓 Would my muse ever lie for sex?

“Why would I do that?”

(She’s never had to, but I could see her maybe doing that with Desi. Like if Desi says ‘tell your family about us or we’re done’, then Holly might lie to her and tell her that she came clean, just so they can keep sleeping together because it’s the only sex she’s ever had that she actually enjoys.)

👿 Would my muse ever blackmail someone into sex?

“Now you’re just being silly.”

(No.)

🎥 Who is my muse’s celebrity crush?

“I dunno, Ashton Kutcher is pretty cute.”

(Angelina Jolie.)

🎀 Who would my muse sleep with if nobody ever had to know?

“...”

(Looking at you, Desi.)

💍 Has my muse ever had a one-night stand?

(Again...)

💝 Does my muse like Valentine’s Day?

“It’s okay, I guess...”

(She likes receiving gifts, but hates having to give blowjobs.)

💘 What are the ways my muse says ‘I love you’ without actually saying it?

(Buying stuff for the person, like clothes or whatever she thinks will look good on them. Sending gifts in the mail. Letting the person see her without make up. Doing activities with them that she doesn’t care for like hiking or sports, stuff that might get her clothes dirty.)

#Anonymous #headcanon #meme

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butchdaydreams · 6 years ago

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1-99 :)

how tall are you?- I’m 5′6″ so I’m pretty average

what is your body type?- My body type is also pretty average I guess, I dont know a whole lot about body types

what is your favorite part about your body?- I have really pretty eyes and my smile is kinda lopsided but I like it all the same

is your current hair color your natural hair color?- Yes it is!

are you more outgoing or more shy?- I am very shy but I can learn to trust people

are you more femme or butch?- Well femme and butch aren’t a scale where you can be “more” of one or another. You either are one or you aren’t and thats all there is to it. But I’m a butch

are you tol or smol?- I’m smol at heart

wine mom or vodka aunt?- Neither, alcohol will kill me

weird habit?- I crack just about every joint in my body so I always sound like a human rice crispy treat

favorite meme?- Anything with dogs in it or those comic sans valentines sent at weird times of the year

do you sing in the shower?- I used to but I use a public shower now and I’ve fallen out of the habit

ever used a bow and arrow?- Yes, and I’m pretty good at it too

are/were you a theatre kid?- I was back in the day but I dropped it in high school so I could do orchestra and sports instead

have you ever seen a broadway musical?- Yes, the last one I was was 4 or so years ago

do you think musicals are cheesy?- I think they can be but I don’t think that makes them bad

have you ever been a part of a protest or a march?-I’ve gone to a couple because I’ve always lived near cities so they are pretty easy to get to

favorite Cards Against Humanity Card?- Bees?

last movie you watched?-This really weird gay movie on netflix, I’m not even sure what it was about even though I just finished it like 20 minutes ago

behind the camera or in front of it?- Behind it all the way

favorite tv show?- Primeval

meaning behind your url- I’m a butch and I am all of your daydreams

reason you joined tumblr- I was a depressed kid 7 years ago who needed somewhere to go, and this is where I ended up

who’s your closest tumblr friend?- @kinkyfemmeprincess at the moment, but I dont think she knows it

what’s something most people love that you hate?- I eat an obscene amount of pickles on a daily basis

have you ever taken narcotics?- Yes and I’ve hated it every time

have you had sex?- Yes I have and thats where that ends

have you ever gotten caught sneaking out or doing anything bad?- I don’t think so, or if I have I’ve always been able to talk my way out of it

worst/funniest lie you’ve ever told?- I try not to lie so nothing really comes to mind

describe your passion without mentioning it.- They are small and cute and not real but also could kill you with a single glance most of the time

describe your best friend.- He’s smaller than I am so I have to protect him, and we love to antagonize one another but its the fun kind of antagonizing

give us one thing about you that no one knows.-I run this blog because I am lonely and need that sweet sweet validation

how do you feel right now?- Kinda sad because I was way more into a girl than she was into me and now its over and I miss her

what is your biggest fear?- Being left behind or forgotten by those I care about

what’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?- Footloose

what is the best decision you’ve made in your life so far?- I think going to school was a good choice because every good thing that has happened to me in the last three years has come from that choice

have you ever tried your hardest and then been disappointed in the end?- Yeah, girls man. Sometimes you just can’t win

something you fantasize about.- I really want to own one of those little mini cows with the curly hair

last time you cried and why- Last night as I had my final conversation with that girl I mentioned earlier

what was the last thing that made you laugh?- I went fossil hunting today and my friend fell on her butt in a creek

do you really, truly miss someone right now?- Yeah, yeah I do

who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?- I think the boy I mentioned earlier, he is a good listener even if he can’t fix the problems

the last time you felt broken?- Whenever someone leaves me

are you starting to realize anything?- That maybe I expect too much from people and I need to learn to just accept what I’m given or I will be very lonely

are you more dominant or more submissive?- I’m dominant in the way that I am strictly a top but submissive in that I will do exactly what you ask me to because I want to see you happy

i’ll only date you if _____. (fill in the blank)- You are willing to try and show me that you love and care for me

do you prefer to date people the same age as you, younger, or older?- I like people who aren’t more than two years older or younger than me

describe the person you’re in love with/have a crush on in great detail.- I’ve never met them in person, but for a while she was the sweetest person I knew. She would talk to me and make me feel loved and special, but she lost interest as people do and it’s over now

do you have any kinks?- I love teasing and edging and overstimulation

first thing you notice in a person?- Their eyes, I love eyes

how can someone win your heart?- Talk to me, listen to me, and let me know that you care about me

been rejected by a crush?- More times than I can count. One time I told a girl I liked her and she responded by saying that she didn’t like me back and was leaving the country for four years

have you ever had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back?- Again, more times than I could count

would you have sex with the last person you text messaged?- No, because I want to respect her boundaries

is trust a big issue for you?- Yes, it is hard for me to trust people and each time it is broken it gets a little harder

did you hang out with the person you like recently?- No, I didn’t get to meet her in person

is confidence cute?- Oh yes!

what would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy?- I don’t say anything, I let it happen and walk away because who am I to take that away from them

would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh?- No, because I think that laughing around another person is a huge part of a relationship

does the person you have feelings for right now know you do?- Yes she does but that’s how it goes

ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush?- I trip over things a lot, and I mix up my words and drop things. I’m an all around mess when I like someone

do you want to get married?- I would love to, it is a dream of mine. I know this generation is trying to do away with marriage, but I like the idea a lot

worst thing you’ve ever done?- My ex wound up in the hospital for four days after she tried to kill herself when I broke up with her. She told me she would do it if we ever broke up months before we did, but I did it anyway knowing she would do it

three things that turn you on.- Looking at me with that determined look and knowing that you are getting what you want from me, trying to turn me on because you want me, and when all else fails, telling me that you are wet because you want me

who do you hate?- I don’t think I hate anyone. It is hard to make me mad and I am very forgiving

favorite term of endearment?- Stick the word “my” in front of any pet name and I will melt

who was your celebrity/fictional gay awakening?- When Hayley Kiyoko played Velma in that live action scooby doo movie

intimidating girls or kind girls?- Kindness is the way to my heart

what do you look for in a possible partner?- I look for someone who I could trust to be able to help me look after any kids we had together with out holding any resentment if we were to ever get divorced

do you tend to like more masculine, feminine, or androgynous girls?- I like people on the feminine or androgynous side of things

are you good at flirting?- I don’t think so but I also know that some people find that to be endearing

who was the first person you came out to?- My friend Emily, I wanted advice on asking a girl to prom and then more advice on how to get over the rejection

do you have any friends who are wlw?- Most of my friends are gay in some way because straight people are stupid

is your crush wlw?- Yes

last person to make you reconsider your sexuality?- No one, I am a die hard lesbian and would not touch a man with a 12 foot pole even if I was paid

write a short love poem to your crush/self? Roses are red/ violets are blue/ if you don’t talk to me/ then I wont put in the effort for you

do you fall in love easily?- Far, far too easily

is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about?- The whole situation with my ex

are you good at hiding your feelings?- I’d say so. People think they can tell, but thats when I’m putting on the act of hiding my feelings while still hoping that they notice

are you a forgiving person?- I am a very forgiving person and it has gotten me into trouble more than once

what is your “type?”- Soft, caring, enthusiastic girls

fall asleep in her arms or rub her back until she falls asleep in yours?- I typically hold her, but every once in a while even a butch needs to be held

tall girls or short girls?- I’m 5′6″, so I can appreciate both girls who are taller and shorter. I think I would go with shorter

hugs or kisses?- Kisses!!! Kiss me!!!! Please!!!

twirl her around or get twirled?- I get buff so I can pick up my wife one day

tummy kisses or thigh kisses?- Thighs

hairline kisses or neck kisses?-Neck

play with her hair or stroke her tummy?- Play with her hair because tummies are often ticklish

making out or soft kisses?- Soft kisses that lead to making out

hugs around the neck or hugs around the waist?- Also neck

how confident are you in your sexuality?- I am confident that I am a lesbian, but not to confident to proclaim it to the homophobic town I live in

when you like someone do you blush or get butterflies in your stomach?- Oof, I get both. So much it feels like I can’t breathe sometimes

have you ever liked a friend as more than a friend? did you tell them?- I believe in being honest, so I have told everyone that I have liked that I am into them

how old were you when you realized you were into girls?- 7th grade, but I denied it to myself until 10th grade

most embarrassing thing you’ve done in front of a cute girl?- I walk into a lot of things while staring at girls or my phone screen

do you have a favorite lesbian ship? is it canon?- This is lame, but Korra and Asami from the Avatar series

what is the most aggravating thing someone has said to you about your sexuality?- Anything that even implies that I should give men a shot or be more open to men

when was the last time a girl made your heart flutter?- Just a couple of days ago, before you stopped talking to me

what is love to you?- Love its more than that feeling of butterflies. It’s seeing when they are struggling, and its helping them even when you are struggling too. Its a choice you make to stay faithful and remember them, it’s the choice you make to go just a little bit out of your way to make their life better. It’s choosing to loose an argument where you can prove that you are right with sources because you hate seeing them mad. Love is how you care for someone even when it hurts. Love is putting them first in everything you do

#ask

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onceuponaprincessworld · 7 years ago

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CaptainSwan One-Shots Recs p.15

Hello CS Fandom. After the news about the returning cast for the ouat finale I thought to celebrate by making a new list. So, here you have my new rec list of one-shots, they are all a delight to read and re-read. Hope you enjoy! 💗 💗

If you are intrested you can find my other lists here.

Baskets and Bouquets, @best-left-hook-jones

There are a few things that Emma Swan is absolutely certain about; no morning is tolerable without at least one cup of coffee, all marriage is a sham, and if a stupidly handsome guy walks into her tiny flower shop with a massive order for flower arrangements six weeks before a wedding, he’s damn well going to have to help her. Flowershop!AU

Spring in the Valley of Death, @the-reason-to-sail-home

Queen Emma of the Underworld enlists the help of a magical healer when her son falls deathly ill. Killian Jones, one of the best healers alive, is Emma's last hope. But with so many people who need him, he can't stay down in the Underworld forever. With the help of a few pomegranate seeds, he may not have a choice.

Sharp Corners and Crisp Folds, @welllpthisishappening

It’s going to take hours. Days. The rest of her goddamn life. Probably not. That last one is a bit dramatic.

But, honestly, it’s going to take a ton of time to refold all those shirts and this guy just keeps wandering around the store with, seemingly, no purpose and Emma has no customer service skills at all. Mary Margaret would know what to do. Mary Margaret is not there.

It’s just Emma and the t-shirt destroyer. And his goddamn, stupid leather jacket.

Ocean Blue, @wellhellotragic

There were three things certain in Killian Jones's life.

1) His brother was his idol. 2) He was helplessly in love with Emma Swan. 3) She absolutely didn't love him back.

She'd made that clear five years ago when he left Boston. So when he was forced to return to Boston once more, a city he swore he'd never return to, Killian had never expected to see Emma Swan again, much less at Liam's funeral

Losing his only brother was devastating. Learning what he had done was wo

the accident, @rouhn

Emma is a doctor and Killian rush his niece/nephew to the hospital because of some accident and he is blaming himself because that happened while he was babysitting. Maybe kind of angsty, with worried Killian?“

be patient..., @startswithhope

Honestly, this is just an excuse to write kissing...and making out. It's set in some vague Modern AU, but has the feel of the end of S3 character dynamic between K&E.

Prompt, @xemmaloveskillianx

Killian and Emma sheriffing in Storybrooke is beautiful.

So NOT Pregnant, @hookedonapirate

Emma didn’t believe them when they told her she was pregnant.

The Recipe, @emmakillianfan

Chefs Emma Swan and Killian Jones both have their reasons to compete in the Culinary Championships for a large cash prize. But when they are paired as a team, they must learn to work together or it could all go up in flames. Part of the Captain Swan Little Bang 2018!

Transatlanticism, @mahstatins

Emma Swan went to Britain looking for family. It should have been a Hallmark movie, a Christmas miracle waiting to happen. Instead she’s stuck in a grimy London ‘flat’, with the worst next door neighbor in the world.

Well, maybe not the worst.

The Writing's On The Wall, @idristardis

Normally quiet and sleepy, Storybrooke, Maine has been going through the polar opposite of a crime wave. There hasn’t been even so much as an incident of shoplifting in MONTHS. Until the day an anonymous graffiti artist starts leaving murals and street art all over prominent town buildings. Who’s behind it? Why don’t the townspeople want to press charges if/when the “vandal” is caught? And what does all of this have to do with Sheriff Emma Swan and local bakery owner Killian Jones?

The tree, @flipperbrain

A tree falls in the backyard. There’s clean up and sore muscles, with feelings and a little sex to attend to.

THE GALLERY OF LOST PORTRAITS, @lenfaz

Dancing With Our Hands Tied, cocoa-and-rum

Killian Jones and Emma Swan are two police officers who see the world in black and white. When she is transferred from Storybrooke, Maine to precinct 99 of the NYPD in Brooklyn, they don't expect to be partnered to take down the infamous Teach. They also don't expect to see color the day she arrives. [A CS B99/Soulmates AU]

Only One Way This Could Go, wingedlioness

from the prompt by loving-cs-fanfiction on tumblr: I need a fic where Emma and Killian are soul mates and everyone knows (because their soul mate identifying symbols are like super visual), but they act like rivals and say they “don’t want to be forced together”, but are actually secretly dating after a drunk hook up.

Everything Comes Back to You, @once-uponacaptain

Ready for a change in their lives, Emma and Henry move from New York to her hometown of Storybrooke. But she gets a bigger change than she bargained for when Henry's new teacher is the ex-boyfriend she hasn't seen since college … who is also Henry's dad, and doesn't know he has a son. Written as part of the Captain Swan Little Bang

kiss me (on this cold december night), @jennifer-morrison

Maybe asking your best friend to pretend to be your boyfriend as you make a trip back home isn’t the smartest idea Emma’s had in a while. then again, how smart is Killian for actually saying yes?

It Was Always You, @distant-rose

Four words completely change Emma Swan’s frienship with her favorite police detective Killian Jones when she drops off one of her skips on Valentine’s Day.

write you a love song, emmaofmisthaven

When she gets out of the dressing room, Killian’s phone is nowhere to be found as her manager leads against the opposite wall, arms folded on his chest. He looks like a rock star himself, more often than not, with his dark clothes and handsome face. Not for the first time, Emma wonders how such a man settled on a backstage career when it is damn obvious he would thrive under the public gaze. Not that she would have it any other way. He’s too good a manager for that.

#cs ff #cs rec ff #cs fic rec #cs ff rec #cs fic #cs fanfiction #cs fanfics #cs rec fic #cs rec ff #cs rec list #my rec list

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theunmarriedmarried · 8 years ago

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February 15, 2017

I think that maybe my concern with getting married is that I am hung up on “the one,” or being the right fit with my fiancé. Like, I don’t want to crack under pressure years from now and wind up getting divorced and hating each other because, “Ooops, turns out were bad for each other after all.” I’m sure no one goes into marriage wanting to divorce, but one of my biggest goals has always been to have my first marriage be my last marriage, and be strong enough within that marriage to withstand any hardship, strong enough to put my pride aside and work through conflicts healthily, both myself and my partner, so that we don’t need divorce as a resolution. I want a strong and unbreakable love, I’ve always been very sentimental that way, and I think that maybe my expectations are too high and that’s why I have all of these backwards feelings about getting married even though I want to get married.

I spent all of those years growing up with unrealistic relationship models around me, from magazines, countless books, movies, and from stories of friends. While there were some super romantic boys in my teens years (never the guys I dated, though)–you know, the ones who line the halls with flower petals and organize a flash mob to ask their girlfriend to Prom��the majority of guys aren’t like that. Most cases of romance such as that are “Hollywood” cases, meaning that they’re made up to specifically cater to someone’s romantic fantasy.

Fantasy: the faculty or activity of imagining things, especially things that are impossible or improbable.

There’s this idea out there that we can find our dream mate, that there is someone out there in the world who meets every quality on our list and is ours by destiny. Well… I’ve always deeply believed in that idea, but the older I get and the more I experience, I think my idea of what a soul mate is supposed to be is extremely inaccurate.

There are so many things in my life that have not turned out the way that I had always imagined… - Growing up, I always thought I’d have a daughter, and that we’d conquer the world together. I could teach her everything there is to know about being a woman, friend, daughter, girlfriend, and even a mother of her own someday. But nope, I had a little boy. - I always thought I’d have a good relationship with the members of my family. Even though I acted out as a child and teenager, I figured that we could all reach a place of maturity and understanding with one another… but my mom thinks that I’m a liar, and that I’m full of myself and really bitchy and always on the defense, and that I hate her. and my brother… well… I just don’t think he really likes me. At least not anymore. and my grandmother… man, that’s the worst. My grandma was my best friend, and now, she’s awful to me. She plays these mind games and tries to cause drama, and she flakes out on me and lets me down. She has shown me that I can’t count on her for anything at all anymore, and worst of all, she can’t pull her head far enough out of her ass to show me that she cares about my son–her great grandchild. - I always hoped that I’d end up with my high school sweetheart, or a boy I grew up with, or someone I fell in love with in college (thanks, How I Met Your Mother), but I met my fiancé at a shitty customer service job when I was living in my grandma’s computer room and sharing a bed with my friend at the time. and it wasn’t anything cute and sweet like I imagined with the school/neighbor boy stuff; I saw him and instantly wanted to bone. He was that guy you see at the mall or a concert and you become completely infatuated with him, just, you melt into the floor right then and there. But he’s tall, dark, sexy–out of your league. He goes for skinny, dolled-up, confident bitches. You don’t stand a chance. So you watch him leave, starstruck, and dream about what could have been. That was my fiancé when I first saw him. It was pure lust and fantasy, not how I imagined meeting the guy I’d spend the rest of my life with. - I also always thought that I’d have a best friend by my side through thick and thin. She’d be there through everything past and present, and then she’d be my maid of honor at my wedding… but all of the best friends I’ve ever had have either dropped me or stabbed me in the back. I literally have zero friends, and I always imagined myself at age 22 with a great boyfriend and a good, small, close group of friends. Instead, I’m a stay at home mom who’s going stir crazy and coming to terms with the fact that things don’t go the way we plan, or imagine.

See, and that’s the problem: I am coming to terms with it, I have accepted it for pretty much everything in my life–grandma, college, friends, daughter, etc.–so why can’t I accept my relationship fate?

The problem is that I am focusing on the fantasy and not on the reality.

My fiancé is 5 years older than me. I met him at a shitty customer service job, and he had a serious girlfriend at the time. I had a baby long before I was financially and mentally ready, and it was a little boy (whom I love dearly and wouldn’t trade for the world). We moved to a place I’ve never been before. We’re poor. I have to deal with his two cats whom I love but whom also drive me fucking nuts most of the time. He likes to listen to music too often and spends too much time on his phone. He’s not good with saying how he feels and he kind of makes light of it when I talk about him loving me or getting married (unless he’s drunk). He doesn’t clean up after himself, hardly ever. He isn’t as good with our son as I am, and is awkward about making an effort. He can’t control his attitude when he’s mad. He holds things in until he feels better and then never addresses them nor tries to get closure. He doesn’t care about holidays nor celebrating milestones like birthdays or anniversaries. He doesn’t care about being close to family, neither geographically nor emotionally.

He is not at all the image of the man I thought I’d end up with. But do you want to know something? It doesn’t matter. I’ll tell you why.

Well, the answer is pretty simple, really (and obvious); I love him. Not only do I love him, but I am in love with him.

Yes, he has flaws that I absolutely cannot stand, but they are minor flaws. The problem is thinking that there is someone out there whose flaws aren’t necessarily flaws for you… but that’s not realistic. The key is to be with someone whose flaws you can handle for the rest of your life, no matter how you feel about said flaws. and when you love someone, that is so much easier to do than it seems.

Yes, my life is not how I imagined it would be at this point.

Yes, I would love to receive dramatic acts of romance which showcase his love for me.

Yes, I wish he would love me the way that I want to be loved.

But these are not at all deal breakers and I need to stop telling myself that they are.

He DOES love me the way that I want to be loved–wholly and unconditionally. He may not show it the way I’d like him to but he shows me in his own ways.

He kisses me before he leaves for work, every morning, with an “I love you” to start my day, and he does the same every night when he rolls over to fall asleep. He covers me up with the blankets when he leaves in the morning, and he turns on the heater for me so that I’m not freezing when I wake up. He gets most of our son’s poopy diapers because he knows I do all of the other hardships with him. He also gets our son ready for bed almost every night. He supports me in all of the crazy hobbies that I pick up, even if they’re expensive and time consuming. He makes me laugh like nobody does. We have more in common than I’ve ever had with anybody in my entire life. He buys me snacks or drinks that I like when he stops in at a store on his way home from work, surprises me with them when he gets home. He knows I don’t like that he smokes, so he washes up after every cigarette and has taken it upon himself to cut back so that he can eventually quit. He almost always leaves me the last of every treat or good dinner we’ve picked out. He listens to me vent about my family and about stupid people online, and he actually gives me advice; he always says the right thing. He is on the exact same page as me about marriage, about making a happy life together and working hard to be in a healthy relationship with me where we can make it through anything (make-up sex, anyone?). The list goes on.

He loves me. He loves me in his own ways in the best ways that he can, and I need to stop taking it personally just because he didn’t fill the bedroom with roses and balloons on Valentine’s Day, or because he could only work up the courage to give me that diamond ring after he had a few beers in him.

I love him. I love him like crazy, and the thought of not being with him terrifies me. Sure, we have some things we could work on–every couple and family does–but I love our relationship.

I ought to go back to that post from the thirteenth and slap myself. It can be so difficult to focus on the important things and remove yourself from the situation when you’re so mad. Anger and pain cloud your vision so much. Communicating is the only way to rise above. But you have to do it effectively. Listen when your partner is talking. Remove yourself and try to put yourself in their shoes. See their point of view, understand where they’re coming from. Watch your tone when you respond. Remind yourself and your partner that you love them and that you want to work through this so that the both of you can be happy.

Be honest, be patient, keep your mind open, trust, and communicate.

Your love for one another is so much bigger than any fight you may have, even if the fight feels so big and important in the moment.

Do not let your ego, anger, or expectations get the best of you.

The hardest part of growing up is seeing everyone for who they are, seeing them as human, and when you’re human, you’re complex and you make mistakes. We can learn to overcome those mistakes and love each other through them, because you will never find a human who is wholly perfect–not in looks, not in character, not in habits, and certainly not in expectation.

So… yes, I still want to get married. I don’t want to put off the engagement. I was just hurt and that’s how I felt at the moment–and that’s why I made this blog, so I can release those feelings and maybe let someone else out there know that if they’re feeling the same way, they’re not alone. Like I said, every couple has their ups and downs. You know you’re ready for marriage when the ups far outweigh the downs, and here, they certainly do. ❤

#marriage #relationships #relationship advice

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almajonesnjna · 8 years ago

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The Importance of Loving Your “Unlovable” Parts

Valentine’s Day is typically a time to celebrate and appreciate romantic love. Maybe you make a conscious effort to acknowledge your partner for the little things they do to make your life better, or maybe you’re single and spend the time appreciating your friends, your family, or yourself.

The common thread for most people, no matter what it is they’re spending their loving attention on, is that they will focus on the easy-to-love parts. We focus on the nice things our partner does that make us feel good, rather than the incredibly irritating stuff they do that forces us to look inward at why TF it makes us so mad/sad/annoyed.

In short, we have a tendency to focus our approval on the stuff that’s easy to approve of, and focus our appreciation on the stuff that’s easy to appreciate.

This is nice, but will get you exactly nowhere if your goal is to become a more loving, accepting, open-hearted, compassionate, or peaceful person. The really difficult, but really important work comes in when you spend your energy learning to love, appreciate, and celebrate the shit that seems completely UNlovable.

This applies to your partner, your friends and family, your body, and yourself. In fact, when it comes to self-love, this lesson is even more apt. It’s relatively easy to appreciate how pretty you look with fake eyelashes and a blowout, right? But how about when you wake up first thing in the morning with puffy eyes and bedhead?

We all have stuff we deem “easy to accept and love.” As awesome as it is to notice and celebrate these parts of ourselves, they don’t offer many opportunities to heal or become more loving, because there is nothing to overcome.

We also all have stuff we deem “difficult or impossible to accept and love.” These parts of ourselves are the ones that feel like fucking hurdles standing in the way of our ability to love ourselves. As unpopular as they are, these challenging, painful parts offer the best possible opportunities to heal, grow, and become capable of loving and accepting yourself on a deeper level.

Loving your body; loving your self

Learning to love and accept your body is important. In our culture, women are often so preoccupied by what’s wrong with our bodies that we live in a perpetual state of distraction and disembodiment, thus never getting to do the important work we were put here on earth to do.

As a body image coach, it’s my job to help women learn how to love and accept their bodies. The thing is though, it’s never just about your body. Body image issues are always about something deeper, and until you deal with the deeper stuff, you’ll never be able to make peace with your physical body. (Watch my recent TEDx talk Body Image: Not Just About Your Body to learn more about this.)

Hating your body is always a representation of something about you that feels inherently unlovable. So for the rest of this article, I’ll be discussing the inner stuff instead of the outer stuff. That having been said, if you struggle with a negative body image, this stuff all still undoubtedly applies.

How we fracture

As children, we learn that some traits and behaviors earn us praise and approval, while other traits and behaviors get us in trouble. Since all humans fundamentally crave love and approval, we naturally start to present ourselves in a way that has the highest chance of earning us that love and approval, while we hide the parts of us that seem to threaten our love and approval.

Eventually (after years of practice and experience), we build an identity around the parts of ourselves that consistently earn us love, and we reject the parts of ourselves that seem shameful, bad, or difficult to love. In this way, as we grow up, most of us fracture ourselves into two categories: good and bad; lovable and unlovable; included and excluded.

While there are many common themes, the exact parts that a person chooses to present or hide will depend on the unique reactions and values of their core family and formative experiences. If your parents h1ushed or shamed you for crying for example, you might have learned to hide your sadness and your tears. If your first boyfriend made you feel stupid and crazy for feeling jealous, you may have learned to suppress or ignore your intuition or jealousy.

The important thing to remember is that learning to hide or reject parts of yourself is not the same thing as actually getting rid of those parts of yourself.

We all have the desire to cry sometimes, no matter what you learned. We all experience jealousy. While these traits and experiences might seem “bad” or “unlovable” in your experience, they are actually just a part of the human experience. The same goes for all the other stuff our culture has a tendency to reject, like pain, suffering, shame, depression, and loneliness.

Most of us go around carrying secret dark parts of ourselves that we have rejected. I call this our “dark material,” or our “excluded selves,” and everyone has it. You have probably been hoping that if you ignore or suppress your dark material for long enough, it will eventually go away.

But that’s not how it works. In fact, the harder you work to reject it, the more powerful it becomes. This is why it’s so important to integrate your excluded or dark material back into your self-identity.

The importance of reintegrating

No matter how you look at it, rejecting a part of who you are is an act of self-violence. Even if the part of yourself that you’re rejecting seems really terrible, the simple act of rejecting it creates an inherent sense of being fractured and broken. Plus you can never fully relax and be at peace, because you’ve basically declared war. You must always stay on vigilant guard against this unlovable part of you, lest it try to show up and cost you all the effort you’ve put into being lovable.

The painful result of this fractured self-identity is that we carry around the burden of fear that someone will find out about the existence of our dark material, and see how unlovable we really are. Have you ever felt like an imposter in your life, sure that if anyone saw you for who you really are, they wouldn’t like or love you anymore?

The only solution to this imposter syndrome, and to the shame of feeling false or broken, is to reintegrate your dark material into your sense of self. You need to welcome your unlovable parts home, and promise to love them anyway.

Reintegrating as a practice for deep self-love

I have no doubt that some parts of you are really easy to love. You’re probably really smart, and loving, and funny. Maybe you’re extremely talented or hard-working. You might be a great friend, a dedicated parent, or a loyal employee.

When I talk to women about self-love, this is often where we start:

“Tell me about the parts of you that are easy to love. Tell me what you’re amazing at. Tell me what you’re proud of. Tell me what you want people to see about you.”

Most likely, your answers to these questions are similar to the traits and qualities that earned you love and approval as a child. These are the traits and qualities that are easy for you to embody. They’re well practiced parts of your identity, and you recognize their value.

When it comes to true self-love and self-acceptance however, recognizing these traits and qualities is not going to cut it. That’s because they are, in your mind, already inherently lovable. They aren’t risky, or painful, or dangerous.

If you want to learn how to deeply love yourself, you have to send love and attention to the parts of you that you believe are dangerous. The parts that you feel sure will cost you opportunities, connection, attention, and approval. The parts of yourself that you have deemed inherently unlovable: your dark material.

In order to experience deep self-love, you have to invite your dark material to come home.

Reintegration of your dark material may be a simple concept, but it’s far from easy to put into practice. Every single one of us experiences insecurity, shame, fear, anger, grief, pain, and all kinds of other stuff that we would rather people didn’t see about us.

The important thing to remember is that these traits and qualities aren’t bad or weird or unlovable; they’re human. Don’t let yourself be fooled into believing you’re an outlier of any kind: whatever you’re feeling (no matter how horrible), other people feel that way too.

If you’re brand new to the concept of loving your unlovable parts, prepare to be challenged. You’re turning a lifetime of programming upside down, and it’s extremely difficult and even painful. I promise you though that it will get easier the more you do it. It’s a skill, like anything else, and you’ll improve the more you practice.

A client of mine once told me she was afraid of how much anger she felt. She said that if she started allowing herself to feel it, she was afraid the rage would whip through her life like wildfire and “burn everything to the ground.” I told her that her fear was understandable, and to first sit and breathe and allow herself to experience that fear.

Then I had her write a letter to her anger, explaining why she had ignored and rejected it for so long, apologizing for declaring war against is, and asking it to move– gently and slowly– back in with her.

Practically overnight, my client found that her rage had significantly diminished, along with her fear of it. By taking this first step to invite her anger to come home, she began the long journey to finally processing all the stuff she had been so angry about for so long.

And this is where the magic happens: by finding a way to love the unlovable, you expand and grow in impossibly wonderful ways. By proving to yourself that the monster in your closet is really just a prince in disguise, you become braver, less afraid, more playful, more kind, and more authentically you.

Bit by bit, by facing and reintegrating your dark material, you will experience a new sense of peace, love, acceptance, compassion, and wholeness inside of yourself. You will face the world without fear or hiding, and you start finding joy and beauty in places you never expected.

Which parts of yourself do you consider “unlovable”? Which parts do you hate, reject, or fear are “too much” for the world to handle? Which parts of yourself have you rejected and excluded from your identity?

This Valentine’s Day, spend your love and attention on the hardest-to-love parts of yourself. Go out of your way to face, recognize, appreciate, and celebrate the “least lovable” parts of yourself. Apologize, wave a white flag, and invite your “worst” and “most shameful” qualities to come home.

You’ll be amazed at how much more love you can experience.

The post The Importance of Loving Your “Unlovable” Parts appeared first on Jessi Kneeland.

0 notes

joshuabradleyn · 8 years ago

Text

The Importance of Loving Your “Unlovable” Parts

In short, we have a tendency to focus our approval on the stuff that’s easy to approve of, and focus our appreciation on the stuff that’s easy to appreciate.

Loving your body; loving your self

How we fracture

The important thing to remember is that learning to hide or reject parts of yourself is not the same thing as actually getting rid of those parts of yourself.

The importance of reintegrating

Reintegrating as a practice for deep self-love

When I talk to women about self-love, this is often where we start:

“Tell me about the parts of you that are easy to love. Tell me what you’re amazing at. Tell me what you’re proud of. Tell me what you want people to see about you.”

In order to experience deep self-love, you have to invite your dark material to come home.

You’ll be amazed at how much more love you can experience.

The post The Importance of Loving Your “Unlovable” Parts appeared first on Jessi Kneeland.

0 notes

albertcaldwellne · 8 years ago

Text

The Importance of Loving Your “Unlovable” Parts

In short, we have a tendency to focus our approval on the stuff that’s easy to approve of, and focus our appreciation on the stuff that’s easy to appreciate.

Loving your body; loving your self

How we fracture

The important thing to remember is that learning to hide or reject parts of yourself is not the same thing as actually getting rid of those parts of yourself.

The importance of reintegrating

Reintegrating as a practice for deep self-love

When I talk to women about self-love, this is often where we start:

“Tell me about the parts of you that are easy to love. Tell me what you’re amazing at. Tell me what you’re proud of. Tell me what you want people to see about you.”

In order to experience deep self-love, you have to invite your dark material to come home.

You’ll be amazed at how much more love you can experience.

The post The Importance of Loving Your “Unlovable” Parts appeared first on Jessi Kneeland.

0 notes

neilmillerne · 8 years ago

Text

The Importance of Loving Your “Unlovable” Parts

In short, we have a tendency to focus our approval on the stuff that’s easy to approve of, and focus our appreciation on the stuff that’s easy to appreciate.

Loving your body; loving your self

How we fracture

The important thing to remember is that learning to hide or reject parts of yourself is not the same thing as actually getting rid of those parts of yourself.

The importance of reintegrating

Reintegrating as a practice for deep self-love

When I talk to women about self-love, this is often where we start:

“Tell me about the parts of you that are easy to love. Tell me what you’re amazing at. Tell me what you’re proud of. Tell me what you want people to see about you.”

In order to experience deep self-love, you have to invite your dark material to come home.

You’ll be amazed at how much more love you can experience.

The post The Importance of Loving Your “Unlovable” Parts appeared first on Jessi Kneeland.

0 notes

johnclapperne · 8 years ago

Text

The Importance of Loving Your “Unlovable” Parts

In short, we have a tendency to focus our approval on the stuff that’s easy to approve of, and focus our appreciation on the stuff that’s easy to appreciate.

Loving your body; loving your self

How we fracture

The important thing to remember is that learning to hide or reject parts of yourself is not the same thing as actually getting rid of those parts of yourself.

The importance of reintegrating

Reintegrating as a practice for deep self-love

When I talk to women about self-love, this is often where we start:

“Tell me about the parts of you that are easy to love. Tell me what you’re amazing at. Tell me what you’re proud of. Tell me what you want people to see about you.”

In order to experience deep self-love, you have to invite your dark material to come home.

You’ll be amazed at how much more love you can experience.

The post The Importance of Loving Your “Unlovable” Parts appeared first on Jessi Kneeland.

0 notes

ruthellisneda · 8 years ago

Text

The Importance of Loving Your “Unlovable” Parts

In short, we have a tendency to focus our approval on the stuff that’s easy to approve of, and focus our appreciation on the stuff that’s easy to appreciate.

Loving your body; loving your self

How we fracture

The important thing to remember is that learning to hide or reject parts of yourself is not the same thing as actually getting rid of those parts of yourself.

The importance of reintegrating

Reintegrating as a practice for deep self-love

When I talk to women about self-love, this is often where we start:

“Tell me about the parts of you that are easy to love. Tell me what you’re amazing at. Tell me what you’re proud of. Tell me what you want people to see about you.”

In order to experience deep self-love, you have to invite your dark material to come home.

You’ll be amazed at how much more love you can experience.

The post The Importance of Loving Your “Unlovable” Parts appeared first on Jessi Kneeland.

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socialattractionuk · 5 years ago

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All the lockdown dating terms and trends you need to know about

Are you up to date on your lockdown lingo? (Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)

The coronavirus pandemic has dramatically changed what dating looks like.

A boozy post-work meetup has been replaced with a just-as-boozy video chat, breaking up over a phone call is suddenly acceptable (because you can’t exactly do it in person), and you can’t rush into getting physical because, well, that’s impossible to do with social distancing measures in place.

With those changes come new terms to describe the state of dating right now.

Language learning app Babbel has rounded up the new lockdown loving terms you should know about, all defind below.

Zumped: To zump someone is the dump them over a Zoom chat. This sounds callous, but it’s actually a pretty kind alternatie to the other options available: ghosting (far easier now they can’t come over and see you) or ditching with a single text.

Coronalingus: Dirty talk happening under lockdown, AKA the main form of sex in a pandemic.

Zoombombing: This one’s got multiple meanings. It can refer to someomne nefariously adding themselves to a Zoom chat (lock your calls, people), but it can also describe those awkward moments your live-in partner accidentally strolls into the background of a personal or professional call.

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All the lockdown dating terms and trends you need to know about

On-nomi: Over in Japan there’s a term for drinking with your pals over video chat – which, of course, is now also our version of a date.

Quarantationship: A relationship formed in lockdown, whether that’s entirely over digital forms of communication or with whoever you happened to share a household with when lockdown came into place.

Quaran-teams: These are couples, often celebrities, who are embracing isolation together. Although spending so much time together can put a strain on any relationship, it may bring the quaranteam closer together. However, the most vocal quaranteams on social media are in danger of accusations of smugsolation – the flaunting of enviable lockdown locations online.

Dating terms and trends, defined

Blue-stalling: When two people are dating and acting like a couple, but one person in the partnership states they're unready for any sort of label or commitment (despite acting in a different manner).

Breadcrumbing: Leaving ‘breadcrumbs’ of interest – random noncommittal messages and notifications that seem to lead on forever, but don’t actually end up taking you anywhere worthwhile Breadcrumbing is all about piquing someone’s interest without the payoff of a date or a relationship.

Caspering: Being a friendly ghost - meaning yes, you ghost, but you offer an explanation beforehand. Caspering is all about being a nice human being with common decency. A novel idea.

Catfish: Someone who uses a fake identity to lure dates online.

Clearing: Clearing season happens in January. It’s when we’re so miserable thanks to Christmas being over, the cold weather, and general seasonal dreariness, that we will hook up with anyone just so we don’t feel completely unattractive. You might bang an ex, or give that creepy guy who you don’t really fancy a chance, or put up with truly awful sex just so you can feel human touch. It’s a tough time. Stay strong.

Cloutlighting: Cloutlighting is the combo of gaslighting and chasing social media clout. Someone will bait the person they’re dating on camera with the intention of getting them upset or angry, or making them look stupid, then share the video for everyone to laugh at.

Cockfishing: Also known as catcocking. When someone sending dick pics uses photo editing software or other methods to change the look of their penis, usually making it look bigger than it really is.

Cuffing season: The chilly autumn and winter months when you are struck by a desire to be coupled up, or cuffed.

Firedooring: Being firedoored is when the access is entirely on one side, so you're always waiting for them to call or text and your efforts are shot down.

Fishing: When someone will send out messages to a bunch of people to see who’d be interested in hooking up, wait to see who responds, then take their pick of who they want to get with. It’s called fishing because the fisher loads up on bait, waits for one fish to bite, then ignores all the others.

Flashpanner: Someone who’s addicted to that warm, fuzzy, and exciting start bit of a relationship, but can’t handle the hard bits that might come after – such as having to make a firm commitment, or meeting their parents, or posting an Instagram photo with them captioned as ‘this one’.

Freckling: Freckling is when someone pops into your dating life when the weather’s nice… and then vanishes once it’s a little chillier.

Gatsbying: To post a video, picture or selfie to public social media purely for a love interest to see it.

Ghosting: Cutting off all communication without explanation.

Grande-ing: Being grateful, rather than resentful, for your exes, just like Ariana Grande.

Hatfishing: When someone who looks better when wearing a hat has pics on their dating profile that exclusively show them wearing hats.

Kittenfishing: Using images that are of you, but are flattering to a point that it might be deceptive. So using really old or heavily edited photos, for example. Kittenfishes can also wildly exaggerate their height, age, interests, or accomplishments.

Lovebombing: Showering someone with attention, gifts, gestures of affection, and promises for your future relationship, only to distract them from your not-so-great bits. In extreme cases this can form the basis for an abusive relationship.

Microcheating: Cheating without physically crossing the line. So stuff like emotional cheating, sexting, confiding in someone other than your partner, that sort of thing.

Mountaineering: Reaching for people who might be out of your league, or reaching for the absolute top of the mountain.

Obligaswiping: The act of endlessly swiping on dating apps and flirt-chatting away with no legitimate intention of meeting up, so you can tell yourself you're doing *something* to put yourself out there.

Orbiting: The act of watching someone's Instagram stories or liking their tweets or generally staying in their 'orbit' after a breakup.

Paperclipping: When someone sporadically pops up to remind you of their existence, to prevent you from ever fully moving on.

Preating: Pre-cheating - laying the groundwork and putting out feelers for cheating, by sending flirty messages or getting closer to a work crush.

Prowling: Going hot and cold when it comes to expressing romantic interest.

R-bombing: Not responding to your messages but reading them all, so you see the 'delivered' and 'read' signs and feel like throwing your phone across the room.

Scroogeing: Dumping someone right before Christmas so you don't have to buy them a present.

Shadowing: Posing with a hot friend in all your dating app photos, knowing people will assume you're the attractive one and will be too polite to ask.

Shaveducking: Feeling deeply confused over whether you're really attracted to a person or if they just have great facial hair.

Sneating:When you go on dates just for a free meal.

Stashing: The act of hiding someone you're dating from your friends, family, and social media.

Submarineing: When someone ghosts, then suddenly returns and acts like nothing happened.

V-lationshipping:When someone you used to date reappears just around Valentine's Day, usually out of loneliness and desperation.

You-turning: Falling head over heels for someone, only to suddenly change your mind and dip.

Zombieing: Ghosting then returning from the dead. Different from submarineing because at least a zombie will acknowledge their distance.

Do you have a story to share? Get in touch by emailing [email protected].

Share your views in the comments section below.

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