#It's like. if I could just save the $200-500 I have to spend on my car every few months.. maybe I could afford another car by now

[jankwritten]

why are my hyperfixations never on anything cheap, bro. it's always gotta be ENAMEL PINS or MECHANICAL KEYBOARDS or BOOKS or ARTWORK and PENS. and broken glass. i guess that one is kinda cheap.

[kittlyns]

If I don't win the lottery or find an old person to leave me their entire fortune........... idk how I'm gonna do it haha

[prettycottagequeer]

ok maybe I'm a little late to this BUT I'm gonna do a to-do list motivation thingy because I've had the worst two weeks since I started college :)

SO these I should start on asap:

50 I make the snack I really want but I haven't had the motivation to make

100 I clean my dorm. another thing I've been meaning to do for a week

150 I do the presentation about mid-victorian fashion I've been putting off (due Monday)

200 I start memorizing the monologue that was due a week ago (now due Tuesday)

these can wait longer:

300 I spend time outside. It's so nice but I'm getting stuck scrolling because I feel like shit. vicious cycle ect

500 I start setting a better weekend routine (aka getting up before noon)

1k I start working out again. I was doing a routine to get more masc and build muscle and I liked it but life hit me like Crowley driving the Bentley and I've missed like 3 weeks

2k I buy my first binder. I've been coping with sports bras for almost a year now and I haven't been able to justify spending $50+ on a binder even though I know I'd love it and use it everyday.

Do I tag people? I don't know but I'm going to. @the-globe-theatre-maggot @weirdly-specific-but-ok @howmanyholesinswisscheese

here's just some context if you want to read, feel free to skip. some of this I've talked about in the maggot server, some I haven't, but I really just need a place for this to go that's out of my head. tw homophobia, transphobia, car crash(??)

How I Have Been Run Over By The Bentley Going 90 In Central London What Feels Like 50 Times In The Last Two Weeks

I'm going to college about 4 hours away from my parents, and it's been really nice. They.. suck, to say the least. transphobic/homophobic ect, super traditional conservative catholic, racist, all of it. so i tried to move somewhere where I wouldn't have to think about them and I could be myself and do what I can to be happy. March 1st was the start of my spring break, which meant going home because the dorms close. I was already not excited, but I was prepared. the problem with being away from home is I forget just how bad they are. My optimism gets the better of me and I think maybe this time they'll be better. so I decided to not hide my septum piercing.

that was a mistake. it starts a whole fight where they say we know you're trans, you're actually a girl and you always will be, we have the bones argument, they think I'm being influenced by demons or something (if only they knew about crowley) because I want to change my name, and they tell me that going on t will completely ruin my body and give me cancer and other things. They're also mad about my dyed hair, septum, and general style, and say I'm setting a terrible example for my (5) younger siblings and make it a point to tell me just how much of a disappointment I am. I think I'm pretty cute and fun but y'know, whatever. very fun time. I lie so much, don't give them any more details about my identity, and say I'm not planning to go on t to save my ass. which is all on instinct which makes me feel worse because if I'm really trans I should be able to stand up for that, right? maybe I'm faking the dysphoria.

the next morning I wake up really sick, and spend the rest of the week sick and feeling like shit because I'm home and back in the same place and situation I was a year ago that I thought I escaped. at one point I pretty much lose my voice but also kind of get gender euphoria from it. it's weird.

On Friday it's time for me to drive back 4 hours to school, and I make it about 3/4 of the way when google maps takes me on a random gravel road and I crash my car, really crash my car, like sideways-in-a-ditch-windows-broken-crawling-up-out-the-door crash it in the middle of nowhere. (I was fully paying attention to the road, it was raining and super slick) I call my parents because I have no one else to call and I sit in a Subway for 3 hours while they drive to get my car. when they get there they're (understandably) really mad, and they tell me that I'm not mature enough to be going to school so far away and I need to get my shit together and stop depending on them. which. is probably true. but made me feel even more stupid about the fact that I crashed my car. I get back to school and I'm still Very Sick with no energy or motivation to do anything. So I've spent the last week trying to get better and honestly to do anything. it hasn't really worked. I'm a lot better health-wise (Not emotionally), still sick but I have a lot of work due, so I really need a push to get started

[bumbllee]

New ana game

Hi everyone! Okay, so i just thought of a new ana game and I think it's really cool, if you try it please tell me how it went^^

So basically you have your every day allowance, just it's not money but instead calories. Your allowance is up to you, it just has to be between 200-600. Now, you can spend all your calories for the day or you can fast and save the rest for the next day or for ur bank account.

For example: my allowance per day would be 500, but I have an event coming or I want a controlled binge or whatever, I could eat 100 cals for 3 days and that way I could eat 1700 on day 4, or I eat on day one 200 and then the next day 800.

The game starts whenever u want, and after one week you can count how many calories u have in your bank account and if u have < 300, u have to starve for 2 days, if u have < 600 for one day and if you're over that ur save. Then the game starts again either after u starved or directly the next day and it starts with an empty bank account.

So yeah, lemme know what you think <3

(pro tip, u can make urself a bank account out of paper or something and then u can make like 100 cals notes out of paper and u can put it there to keep track)

[sewmice]

hello, do you know how many wish tones are needed for UR? i have 11175 and anxious for cecil/shion/masato's birthdays and hoping for christmas gacha like shining live.. i'd like to pull for eiichi now but i'm afraid to. do you know how many are needed for guarantee, if any? do i have enough/am i on track? i don't really understand this wish tone currency and pull rates.. could you please help me? thank you in advance so much!

To absolutely guarantee a UR, aka you have garbage luck and could not pull it at all, you need to pull 200 times, or 20 10-pulls. That will be 50,000 wish tones, and then you can buy the UR from its crown shop. But that is only if you have to use the crown pity system and only on limited banners. Hopefully you will pull the card you want sooner than that though.

You have 4 10-pulls currently. So I would absolutely continue saving up. The Eiichi gacha is not worth imo, none of the birthday ones are. It's just the standard pool of cards, with Rs guaranteed to be him, and his SRs and UR being boosted. And there's no pity system for those birthday banners. It's only luck, so you could spend way more than 50,000 if you have bad luck. Odds are, you will pull those cards naturally on other gachas at some point, so the general advice is to skip them unless you're spending money or really don't care to save up at all. Wait for Shion or Masato's SFM or any of the 3 of them to get a different limited UR.

The bad news is, events, getting S ranks and full combos, and reading stories just don't give as many tones as Shining Live gave prisms. Or in reality, they give about the exact same number, but tones are worth less as the pulls cost more. So we just can't pull as willy-nilly as we did in Shining Live. Gotta save for the boy/card you want.

In good news! They hopefully will change some of those rates? Maybe??? They did with the daily missions after all. And while Tokiya's event story didn't drop tones, Masato's did. So hopefully we'll see more there. ALSO, they've been quite generous with random login bonuses lately. For the end of the summer this week. For Moonshine last week. Various other reasons. So hopefully they'll keep that up.

We get 100 tones a day from daily missions, giving you a little over 1 10-pull per month. The normal login bonus is what, 100 every week as well? (I don't pay the best attention). And I've noticed some 500s occasionally as well from...something in between events. There's 500 separated into 50s along the points ladder for this current Session Live event. And we get 2 events per month. So 1000 there not counting any stories/tiering. So around 2 10-pulls per month with all of that? So without considering any extra login bonuses like we just had, tiering into higher levels, song playing, card stories, or anything else that can vary, it will take about 10 months to guarantee a limited UR. Assuming I did my math right. It likely won't take anyone that long because the random login bonuses they're giving out. But know it CAN take that long.

I hope this was helpful? Informative? Useful? I can explain more about anything if needed!

[inkofamethyst]

25 August 2023

Okay, I'm finally starting to draft my Notion, and one page I'm adding will contain my saving goals. Each month, I plan to put aside anything I have left over toward some items I want to save up for! I'm already committed to saving 5% (may go up to 10%, we'll see) and investing 1.5% monthly (may increase to 3%... maybe), and then I'll save for specific goals (some serious, most fun) after my expenses. For me, almost any single item over $50 is an investment, and any frivolous item over $100 requires serious, long-term consideration before purchase (tbh anything unplanned over $25 feels exorbitantly expensive). I currently have six goals to complete in varying amounts of time:

bass guitar + kit -- I don't have a specific model in mind, but I think I want to learn bass as a treat for myself after passing quals!

american duchess shoes -- I just adore their oxford heels so much, but I think giving myself the time to actively save for them will help me decide whether I actually want them or just like the aesthetic on others

new laptop -- honestly I just want a laptop that's significantly more portable without sacrificing too much power/space (I don't know the slightest thing about computer specs though so I'm going to need a bit of research), and I want to save up enough to get a new one before my current one craps out on me (it's still going strong though!!)

england trip -- I would like to go visit a friend after my first year in grad school, but I'll likely have to dip into savings for this because that's a lot of money to save in a short period

starter emergency fund -- I know that I'm lucky to have familial support, but I want to have a base savings in my account I think to help with anything life has to throw at me. I won't be able to rely on my parents forever. I know you don't go to grad school to save money, and I know I want to live with a bit of comfort and glamour, but I still think this is an important goal to start actively working toward. Since I didn't spend much in college (and got a well-paying internship during lockdown which went directly into savings), I'm not that far off from my goal amount. Until I reach that amount, this one is my priority tbh (and I'll obvi keep adding after reaching this amount).

According to my Notion widget thing, I'd have to have $687 left over each month to reach all of my goals on time using my time and cost estimates (major note: literally $500 of that is going toward the possible england trip bc the turnaround is so quick lol,,,, ~$200 a month toward realistic saving goals aint actually all that bad).

I actually am looking forward to saving for things??? Which is weird and feels very adult. Like yeah having expendable income is nice but I love the idea of having a bit of patience pay off.

I was a little daunted by the idea of starting a Notion for my PhD because there are quite a few expectations I have for it, and I was afraid of not "getting it right" the first time (I recognized that it's unnecessary to create entirely new pages for each semester when I could just add them to a single dashboard to minimize the remaking I have to do each semester (grocery list, recipe book, etc), but this makes me feel like I would be stuck with whatever I crafted the first time even though that's obviously not true). That's a fault of mine that I have to work hard to overcome if I ever want to get anything done. But I watched a video about starting a Notion in ten minutes and the speaker plainly said to just start simple. Then build off of the simplicity in small chunks when you have the time. So that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to keep a lot of the same functions I've used previously that have worked (Academic Timeline, Spaced Rep calendar, grocery list and recipe book), add a savings tracker from a template which I know I want and will use, and worry about all the other little bits at a later date many later dates. Maybe I'll add a half-hour (or single-task) "Notion Tune-Up" to my Admin Friday routine. Play around and fix it up bit by bit brick by boring brick (da-da da da-da da da-da).

I'm going to be relatively close to one of the cities/venues where Welcome to Night Vale is performing on its tour this fall, and I am so so so so tempted to just buy a ticket and go alone. The only thing holding me back is not knowing exactly what my first semester will look like calendar-wise. Like I'd probably (maybe..) skip it if there was an exam the next day, you know? But that opportunity seems almost too good to skip considering the cost (esp since I'm going to have to miss out on The Crane Wives this fall even though they're coming near my hometown for their first tour post-pandemic and that kills me on the inside a little). I'd love to support my favorite scripted podcast if I could. I also just don't know the area at all or how safe it would be to go alone. I mean,,,,, I could just adopt a bit of the delulu and hope for the best. There are only a few more days for me to buy the ticket relatively guilt free and I'm pretty close to just doing it.

Today I'm thankful that my sibling had a good move in day.

I... ugh I really need to get started on my hair. My sister used a hack this last time on her hair where she braided halfway, banded, then came back to it after the roots were all done. I might implement that. There's no way I'll be able to finish all of my hair plus everything else I need to do if I braid every strand straight through. I want to be packed by Sunday night so I can use Monday morning as a last-minute-check period.

[drpg-global-archive]

DRPG - Character Episode - Rozalin

A naive young lady. Now, she's learning all about the outside world, while living in harmony with Adell.

Level 1/New Summon

Humph..... You've summoned me.  This must be important. My name is Rozalin. The sinful rose of the Netherworld. ....What? You're saying you want to train the greatest Overlord in existence? Idiot! If I became the strongest Overlord.... I'd just feel empty inside,  witnessing people getting killed day after day.

....Don't waste your time training those boring fools. You should spend your time  dealing with more important matters. Hmph... You want to know more? I'm talking about... Love!!

Level 100

Well..... Adell...... Oh, [Player]. Come and chat with me.  You know Adell... Ah... Adell is my... Uh...  How should I put it? Adell is  someone who has always been there for me. But, he doesn't understand women at all.

I'm very wayward.  I can be a real handful. He has never understood that this is how a girl's heart works! I'm simply acting coquettish  towards the man that I love. Really. He really makes me worry.   [Player], what do you think?

Level 200

Hmph.... Hmph.... Hmph.... Adell.... Oh, [Player]. Listen to me.  There is something definitely wrong with Adell. He once said to me "You're still so beautiful". Duh! Of course I am beautiful!  But Adell has never said  anything like that to me before.

I was so shocked  that I slapped him. He tried to save himself by making the excuse that  he simply said that because of some game he was playing.... Is he playing some dating simulation game  to learn about love....?

If that's the truth...ugh!  Does he actually think he can compare me  to the fake women he sees in a game!? I guess I just have to confront him. You should come help, [Player].

Level 500

............. Oh, [Player]. Sorry. I was thinking about something. ...I've known you for quite some time. I guess I can tell you this. I am Overlord Zenon's only daughter.  I've spent most of my life  sequestered in a massive mansion where I was able to get whatever I wanted. I always believed that my father loved me very much... I always believed that my relationship with my dad was a good one.... But...

But Overlord Zenon isn't actually my father.  No, I was wrong.... He tried to use me.  He kept me in that mansion like it was a cage. But... When I turned 5, Zenon gave me  an old teddy bear.... He gave me a  birthday cake for my 6th birthday.... He made white roses fall down on the garden outside the mansion like snowflakes when I turned 7....

Even now, I still can't believe all of this was just lies.... .....Sorry. This has nothing to do with you. Please forget everything I've told you.

Level 1000

Wow! Lv1000 already! Thanks for all the hard work, [Player]. Time flies quickly when I'm with you.  I don't know why. I never knew that anyone besides Adell could make me feel like this. You've gained my trust. Don't take this lightly! This is maybe your greatest achievement. When I'm with you, I feel like I'm a little girl again.

I want to give you a little gift....  What can I give you that will do the trick? Oh, yes! When Adell and I finally get married,  I'll let you be our witness. Hmph… How about it? Is there any gift better than that?

[muscle-gods-only]

My husband was this tiny little skinny guy when I met him. He was six feet tall and only 120 pounds, with a 26 inch waist. A couple years after we married he got a really stressful job that made a lot of money. After about 6 months at that job he weighed 150 pounds and had a 30 inch waist. I thought he looked better, not so gaunt. About another 6 months passed and he had passed the 200 pound mark, now he had a 36 inch waist and a nice belly for me to play with. I liked being with a bigger man, but he felt gross and fat. He tried dieting and exercising but he fell off quickly. A year later and we had paid off our house but now my husband was weighing just over 400 pounds the years of stress showing on his face. He swore he would lose the weight, but again his efforts were short lived. I loved playing with his massive belly. As a small guy, he was more than three times my weight and I loved his immense size and weight! A year later we had set aside enough money to buy and renovate a house to put up on Air BNB. We were rolling in cash, but he was super stressed at work and moving his now 500+ pound fat body. He made another attempt to lose weight but it didn’t go well. Another year later he was 600 pounds. He was absolutely huge and afraid of losing his ability to stay ambulatory, I loved his massive soft body, but I didn’t like him being unhappy. I said, “Why don’t we buy a second short term rental with our savings, replace most of your income and instead of having all that debilitating stress, you can spend all day going to the gym if you need. Just do cardio all day until you are happy with your body. After a month he lot about 50 pounds and then he got a trainer who talked him into lifting weights to burn calories quicker. He lost the fat, but instead of going back to a scrawny 120 pound bean-pole he’s turned himself into a 360 pound muscle beast less than a year later. Finally I can home last night (less than a year after he quit his job) he looked down at me and said, “I’m being sponsored by a supplement company and the pay is quite good. Why don’t you quit your job now and let me support you?” He started flexing his inhumanly massive muscles and continued, “You have made all me dreams come true, I see no reason why you should have to go to some awful job when I can have you here waiting for me after each workout. I need my wonderful husband here servicing me when I return home from each workout. I mean not long ago I was over 600 pounds of fat, by this time next year I intend to be over 600 pounds of solid muscle. That’s a massive beast that I’m becoming and servicing a man my size is going to be a full time job!” Then he started flexing his oversized muscles for me and I swore I could see them growing as he flexed!

[mentallyincapeside]

Hey so, can you recommend some low cal dinners? I can't escape eating dinner bc my mom makes me eat dinner with her and my sister, BUT she does let me make my own food so I don't have to eat what they're eating all the time, but it's usually just junk😞

ofcc lovie !! i completely understand you, i'm from a junk food family too and it is the worstt. i do have lots of recommendations and tips though, because my parents tend to be super suspicious so i always try to throw them off my scent lol

for food recs:

instant tomato soup - 130 cals, can be eaten with bread or crackers for an added 100-200 cals

panera's instant soups (baked potato, cheddar broccoli, chicken noodle) - 400, 240, and 240 cals respectively

meat, cheese, and veggie sandwich - 400ish cals (choose the lowest cal bread, meats, and cheese possible)

vegetarian chili - 200-300 cals

serving of cereal with serving of milk - 200-300ish cals (this one is a personal favorite because it sounds like so little but it ends up being a decent amount)

english muffins/bagels - 300-400ish cals (including topping)

healthy choice frozen meals - tend to be between 200 and 500 cals. most are 300ish. a literal godsend, it's a full plate of food for so few calories, and it tastes amazing for what it is.

~

unfortunately, eating low cal is a lot easier when you don't have to eat full meals, but those are my personal favs for when i do. i didn't add salads because they tend to vary widely in cals depending on what you add, but if you keep it mostly veggie and lean protein those are a great choice, too.

for dinner tips:

a huge huge huge one that i literally could not recommend more, is going vegetarian (or at the very least telling your family you're going vegetarian). this makes it so much easier to eat less cals and more healthy foods/veggies without attracting suspicion. this has honestly saved my life in my junk food house, because it's never suspicious that i'm eating differently than the rest of my family.

saving cals for when you're going to be eating around your family. my cal limit usually ranges from 250-500 calories a day, so i have to save all of my eating for when i'm in front of my family. wait till dinner to spend your cals, or whenever you'll be with them. casually snack in an area you know they'll be in. the more they see you eating, the more they'll think you're eating. saying 'i'm not hungry' constantly is supicious, but they won't get suspicious if for a good amount of time they see you, you're eating.

c/s, or chew/spitting. it's gross, ik, but it can be super helpful (especially if you're having a family dinner and have to eat the same). make sure you have napkins, and chew as slowly as possible. when you're positive no one is looking, spit the food into the napkin and either hide it under your plate, under other napkins, in your pocket, or whatever would work best for you. you will have to swallow a bit, because food will be stuck in your mouth, but if you can rinse it out with water that would be ideal. the only thing to remember is that you do still consume a small amount of calories doing this, so don't forget to count a few to be safe.

~

so, those are all my recs for dinner with family !! i hope these can help you as much as they tend to help me. xx

[senilthesynth]

oof. was looking into federal student loan consolidation and while the new SAVE plan *would* save me money in the long run... I'd also have a way higher payment at first because I make a lotta money. And I don't think I can handle several hundred in loan payments, that'll climb to almost a thousand as I (and my fiancé) make more money Dx

I'm glad for the MANY this plan helps (especially those whose plan effectively deletes monthly payments or cancels it today), but it just doesn't do shit for monthly payments if you make much more than the income cap.

like. here's the tea. I make 78,000 a year right now (imo kinda high for right outta college, but I ain't complaining). Min wage here is something like $15.50, so like 32,000 a year at full time pre-tax. When me and my fiancé marry, my FEDERAL loan payments alone would shoot up to $500 a month (currently would be $200 for standard repayment)! On top of my existing private loans (thanks mom! /s), that'd be $800 a month TODAY. Depending on our income it could easily be much higher.

That's just, like, a lot! It'll be a bit easier once my fiance is working as well & can contribute some to rent and groceries and stuff, but like. They want to save for a gemology program. I don't want them to feel like they have to juggle working full time plus the program. Sure, my loans would all be paid off in a few years... but that extra $300+ a month is savings for other things in life. *sigh* maybe I'll apply for standard and then swap to SAVE once my fiancé is working.

Assuming my fiancé's loans aren't hell, too.

and I feel like this is an important side of the SAVE plan discussions. There are some things it does very well - interest doesn't capitalize so long as you make payments (and the $0 payments count to that!), much higher no-payment cutoff, loans get forgiven after like 20-25 years no matter what (in line with other income based repayment plans tbh)...

It's just. scaled weirdly. I would love to apply for it because paying less over the loan is VERY appealing to me, even if my payments are a bit higher. I just wish it wasn't SO much higher that it's better to go standard and toss more money at it when I can, knowing that by default I'll spend an extra 15-20k on those loans if I can't.

ugh. I hate that student loans exist. I hate that the forgiveness got axed, and that they aren't going through other avenues to forgive it (and afaik, not HARD pushing Congress/the Democratic party to make loan forgiveness a BIGGER thing).

No cutoffs. No applications. Just delete some amount from our loans.

[basicallyalways]

My mind is just a big jumbled mess

I've been having a hard time today specifically for some reason with feeling overwhelmed from all the thoughts in my head. I feel like I've been starting so many different projects lately that I can't finish anything. I wonder if this is why I'm happiest when I find a new obsession like a video game or something that I just can't stop thinking about or working on. Then that’s just one thing on the front-burner (is that an actual term? Lol) to deal with at one time. Otherwise I have like 4-20 things there at a time.

Since like 2015/2016, I've noticed how hard it is for me to think. It's kind of hard for me to explain it. But basically I get so overwhelmed all of the time. There are so many things I want to accomplish or buy or figure out and it's just so hard for me just sit down and get those things done. Some days are worse than others, like today. Like I just literally had to take a 5 minute break from writing this because I couldn't stop crying with how overwhelmed with thoughts I am and it's just reminding me how hard it truly is for me to be able to communicate and get my thoughts out so they're not clouding my brain. I still can't stop crying but I don't want to forget these thoughts when I do go back to try writing this down because I won't be able to remember all the things I'm thinking/feeling.

I have over 4,600 screenshots in my phone. I have way more in my Google Photos but I don’t know how to figure that number out. I take screenshots of things that I want to remember. You can see how this could be a problem because how am I going to even find these SS's if there are so many of them lost in my phone? And that’s not even taking into account all of the actual photos I have in my phone. It would be slightly easier if they were all of the same subject or even 2 or 3. But there's sooo many different things that I do this for. I'm not sure how many albums I have in either my phone or Google Photos app but I can guarantee there's at least over 100 in each. More examples are my YouTube Playlists and Pinterest Boards. I just counted at least 200 YouTube Playlists I've created. I didn’t feel like counting anymore but I'm sure that’s enough to visualize my point. And then add to the fact that each playlist probably has at least 100 videos. I started making them probably in like 2013. I should probably go back and clean out some of the stuff I don’t care about anymore but that's just one other thing to add to the problem I'm attempting to explain. Now let's look at my Pinterest account. I have about 150 Boards created on there, the most pins in one being about 500. I spend way less time on Pinterest because I forget about it a lot and there's less subjects on there than YT but that’s a good thing for my situation. Each Photo Album, Playlist, and Board was created to organize my thoughts, in a sense. To try to make it easier for me to find whatever I was interested in finding at the time. It does work for that but it also causes more issues for me in the sense that I then have to worry about where I saved something or where I should save something. And there's still so many of them that it’s overwhelming and depressing for me. Oh and I just remembered the fact that I have 3 different apps that I used to make lists. Ugh. I'm not even going to go into how many lists I make. Oh and let's not forget all of the tabs on my computer I constantly have open. I used to be known for being so organized. Like I literally used to want to make a career out of it when I was younger. I'm still kind of organized (at least more than some people) in a way but not in a helpful way.

For those of you who don't know my situation, I'm currently unemployed. I was taking Community College classes from 2010-2016 off and on. I stopped because I was having similar issues to what I just was talking about. I think part of why I had so much trouble was because I had eventually went into full online classes instead of going to class 2-3 days a week. But just in general, school is difficult for someone like me who has issues with feeling overwhelmed to the point of not being able to do anything from the weight of that feeling. I'm lucky that I didn’t start having these issues until after I graduated high school. In fact, I didn’t even realize I had anxiety or depression until my 2nd semester of college classes where I had to leave my math class in the middle of it to go cry in the bathroom. When I was working I was on medication so it wasn’t as difficult to function but I had some off days. Eventually I stopped going to my last job because I couldn’t take having panic attacks every day before work anymore.

I really hope one day I'll be able to clear my head and feel like I can function like a normal human being. Life would be easier if only I had more people in my life (other than my husband) who had a better grasp on this sort of thing and could coach me. I also hope that at least most of this post made any sense and helped you to understand me a little better. I know that I have a tendency to take days and sometimes week to respond to people's messages but this is one of the reasons why that happens.

[self-loving-vampire]

🍍

get pineappled (affectionate)

oh i just found the thing asking people to put fruits for stuff

uh uh get unpinappled

anyway 🍉

If I was a character in a dating sim, my bond levels would actually be kind of like this:

Bond Failed (Bond Points went below -100): This is a category that includes people I don't really trust or that I have concluded I don't enjoy interacting with. I still hold no real hostility towards them or anything but prefer to avoid people who descend to this stage.

Stranger (BP between -99 and 99): I'm not overly interested in strangers. Ever since the empathy loss most people feel kind of dead and separate from me by default. Like they live as completely different existences from myself.

I typically don't go out of my way to interact with people in this category but don't really mind it if they want to talk to me either (at least online).

Tier 1 Bond (BP between 100 and 199): This category is composed of people I somewhat know and have had some positive interactions with. At this point I have begun to make more complex models of what their interests and personalities are but don't really spend much time thinking about them when not currently interacting.

Long-term mutuals are often in this category, especially if they talk about themselves enough for me to get more of an idea of what they're like (this doesn't necessarily require them to reveal anything really personal either).

At the higher ends of this I might agree to interact on discord.

Tier 2 Bond (BP between 200 and 299): This stage goes a bit beyond acquaintance and into something more like friendship. If we are not talking on discord yet I might also bring that up.

At this point it's also more likely that I'll start tagging you in things that I think you might enjoy or passively sharing other stuff I come across.

However, other than that I may still not be that good at initiating conversations at this stage.

Tier 3 Bond (BP between 300 and 399): At this point you're kind of an established friend and can expect regular communication. Depending on how much we're interacting at the time you could maybe even expect to be greeted when you get up and tucked to bed when you have to sleep.

I will likely also introduce you to some of my other friends at this point if I haven't already, and will become far more capable of just talking even without a clear topic in mind.

It's also possible that I'll try to play games with you at this stage.

Tier 4 Bond (BP between 400 and 499): I don't make much of a distinction between close friends and romantic partners, and this is the stage at which that starts to become apparent (but it isn't always a factor, it is also possible to reach this point without such feelings emerging). While I try to be nice and considerate regardless of bond level, there may be some real affection at this stage (if you reach it, which is not really guaranteed for everyone).

I think about people in this category often and try to incorporate them into what I do to some degree, even if just by telling them about it.

By this point we probably know each other very well and I value your presence a lot. It often takes a while to get here and few people have this much compatibility.

Tier 5 Bond (500+ BP): Members of my harem are generally in this category, as are my oldest extant friends. These people mean everything to me and many of them have helped me survive through some very dangerous and painful things.

I feel very connected to these people even though I still don't feel empathy for them. I always do my best to make them happy and support them.

Master: He is in his own category. He is the one who gave me my life, not only in the sense that he physically saved me but also in the sense that he ultimately did more than anyone to reanimate me when I was "dead". Even now he is really what keeps me going.

I live for him and his goals are my goals.

[tendebill]

ok so apparently the reaper bundle is a skin, emote, weapon charm, spray and name card? no highlight intro?? so imo just 2 actually good things (emote + skin) and the rest is kinda... filler ngl. i mostly dont care for sprays (plus most sprays from ow1 are for 25-50 FREE credits), the charms are nice, but no one notices them anyway, hell even i forget i have a charm on 99% of the time, plus theyre SO EXPENSIVE?? you have to spend like 700 credits for most of them?? namecards are okay but i always use the same one anyway. same for player icons. i was kinda on the fence abt the bundle bc i thought i could get a skin + emote + hl intro but now it just doesnt seem worth it xdd

2600 tho? nuh uh. i bought the battle pass, which i saved up for with the goddamn weekly challenges (aka grinded out the 1000 by getting 60 per week) + the skin on its own and im passing up on the emote cuz its not worth it. it costs 500 credits and i only have like 300 leftover rn im not paying additional irl money for just an emote bffr. even if i wanted to grind out the additonal 200, the bundle is only in store for a week and i would get 60 at most so aint gonna happen.

also insane that individual skins (both with and without the bundle) are so much more expensive than the battle pass like WHAT. the BP is filled with skins, voicelines emotes, victory poses- just everything you can get, and its still cheaper than most skins/bundles in shop like goddamn. i spent 1900 on a single skin, meanwhile the BP is 1000.

and the new "tiers" they added to the BP?? the free and premium thing was always there but then they also made the ULTIMATE BP, which is from my understanding the premium BP with additional skins you wouldnt get anywhere else like HOLY SHIT they're farming money so hard i dont think im gonna buy another skin or BP for a WHILE after this, just leaves a foul taste in my mouth lol. this was a moment of weakness bcuz of gabriel reyes wont happen again (i hope i pray)

so season 9 of ow2 drops today (my game is updating as we speak) and this is the first time i spent my own actual real world money on the game (and hopefully the last), cuz theres a new valentines reaper skin and TELL ME WHY THE BUNDLE IS 2600 COINS AKA ABOUT 26$ WHATTTT my ass saved up credits (that u earn slowly overtime by playing the game) for a BP and then i bought and additional 22OO COINS FOR THE REAPER SKIN with ACTUAL MONEY and you're telling me I STILL DONT HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO BUY THIS BUNDLE? man i hate blizzard. they either drop shit skins or drop skins at a price that should warrant burning at the stake what is this.

my only hope rn is that i can buy the things from the bundle i want separately. like obv the bundle has the skin itself, which is probably 1900 coins, but then theres a highlight intro + an emote + a name card + a weapon charm, where the latter two are basically worthless to me tbh

anyway this game is so fun ^^

[is-the-rat-vid-cute]

hey! i've been considering getting rats for a while now, but i'm a high school who makes next to no money at mcdonalds. how much would you recommend i save before getting some rats? how much should i set aside for medical emergencies, food, a good cage, etc.

i don't mind spending a decent amount on them for whatever, i just need to know how long i'll have to wait aha

The cost definitely depends on where you live. I live in a more expensive part of the US, so I can expect to spend around $200-400 for a neuter and $70-80 on a checkup for example. But I know other folks who live in less expensive areas would be looking at around $100 for a neuter and $50 for a checkup. My recommendation would be to call or email a few vets nearby, and ask some questions about pricing. I personally save up this much for each rat since my income isn’t always consistent:

1x surgery, including neuter or spay

3x checkup

2x URI

1x euthanasia (with cremation if desired)

I try to have at least enough to cover those expenses before I get another pair of rats. This is assuming you’re getting rats from a breeder and don’t have exceptionally bad luck — if you get a rat from a feeder bin, pet store, or shelter, I’d recommend saving a bit more for your vet fund since they’ll be more prone to health issues. If the vets in your area won’t tell you their prices, I’d personally recommend a vet fund of around $500-1000 per rat, depending on the cost of living in your area. You don’t have to have all of this up front, but I’d at least recommend having a few hundred dollars in case you run into an emergency as soon as you get them. Some folks with more stable jobs will put a specific amount of money each month aside for the vet fund, which is also an option if you’re confident you’ll have steady income for a while.

The good news is that the vet fund will be your biggest expense, upkeep for rats actually isn’t too expensive. If you have a pair, you can get a 20lb bag of Oxbow from Chewy for $50 and that’ll last you 7-8 months if stored properly, since rats will generally eat 15-20g each per day. It’s a big cost up front but definitely worth it in my experience. If you don’t have that money up front, you can also get 3lb bags for around $12 from Chewy, which would last about a month for a pair of rats.

If you’re looking to save money on bedding, I highly recommend the big bags of kiln-dried pine shavings that farm stores often have. Tractor Supply Co in the US has bags for around $7 that last a month or two. Aspen is similar, I get bags from TSC for $15 each and that usually lasts about a month.

Lastly, bin cages are great inexpensive options for a pair of rats. If you want to buy a cage, you’d probably want to budget around $150 (again depending on your area), but bin cages can be made for much cheaper. You just need 1/2 inch hardware cloth (around $20 at Home Depot), a plastic storage tote (I recommend at least 50-75g for 2 rats, probably also around $20-30), and some zip ties ($10-15 for a big pack). There are some tutorials on how to make bin cages here and here. If you don’t want to DIY something, I highly recommend looking at used cages on places like Craigslist and FB Marketplace, though if you’re a minor (or even if not tbh) I’d recommend bringing a trusted adult with you since people on there can be sketch sometimes. Critter Nation cages are great but expensive, you could also get a rabbit or Guinea pig cage, but you’d need to put hardware cloth over the bars if they’re any wider than 1/2 inch to prevent escapes.

As someone who’s also not in a super financially stable place right now, I like to have around 6 months of food and bedding on hand when I can, just for my own peace of mind. But honestly making sure you have a big enough vet fund is the most important thing in my opinion — especially since rats live such short lives, health emergencies can often come out of nowhere. A cage is the biggest one-time purchase, and food and bedding costs can be under $20 a month if you’re smart about it. But vet bills are something that are a lot harder to come up with, and it definitely is worth it to be prepared in that regard.

I also want to mention since you said you’re a high schooler — please make sure your parents are on board. I’ve seen many minors get pets and then have their parents be unwilling to drive them to the vet or help out with necessary care, so I feel obligated to mention it. If you can’t drive, make sure you have a solid backup plan for vet or supply trips, whether that’s an Uber, public transport, or getting a ride from a parent or friend. And make sure that you have a plan for the rats when you move to your next stage of life — whether that’s going to college or trade school or otherwise moving out, it’s worth it to consider if the rats will still be around by then and what you’ll do with them at that point, whether that’s rehoming or finding a way to bring them with you.

Hopefully this helped a bit — unfortunately a lot of the costs do depend on your area a lot but I commend you for making sure you’re financially prepared ahead of time. Many people don’t realize how expensive rat vet bills can be, but having a good fund set up for them ahead of time will save you so much stress and heartache. Let me know if you have any other questions!

[estiebestieban]

Because we only girlboss, and not gatekeep, here's what you need to make stickers for fun in the same way I do (and the limitations of this method)

(I’m writing this up for transparency, seeing as I didn’t quite know what I was getting myself into when I first started out  -  I’m by no means an expert, but I also think information should be accessible, and it’s a really fun hobby if you’re looking for a new creative outlet!)

I bought a Brother Scan and Cut CM700 a few months ago. This is a plotter. I use it to cut shapes from vinyl, although, you can also put in pen tools in order to draw shapes! (I don't have the pen tool, but I could)

The specific type of plotter I have retails for around 400 euros new, I bought mine second-hand because I'm poor. Anyway, there are smaller models available, for example, the Cricut Joy (about 150 euros, new) is a more compact machine. I just knew I wanted to make bigger projects, so it wasn't an option for me.

Anyway, you have your machine, you want to make some cool stickers... now what?

You're going to need the following items:

- foil

- a cutting mat

- a cutting blade (probably included with the machine)

- even more foil

- if you decide to put your designs onto fabric, you’re going to need a heat press

- somewhere to put your sticker on, eventually, if you want.

A plotter is pretty limited in the sense that you can't really cut out multiple colours, or create a hue, in one single go. You work with negative space (generally in black and white when designing) and from there you figure out what to pull away, and what to keep.

(There are printers available that can print directly onto sticker foil, I don't have one of those, so I can't talk about them - they are generally about the same price as plotters give or take, or at least somewhere in that ballpark.) 

When working with the average plotter, you can easily create designs such like these: *source, google*

As you can see, these are cut from one colour, and after removing the excess foil, you get pretty cool shapes!

Now, you should think about where you want to put your designs. But before I explain that, I should talk about the different kinds of foil.

You’re probably going to use Flex foil. Flex foil can be used to transfer your designs onto quite literally anything. Personally, I’ve put my designs onto mirrors, glass, cars (both windows as well as bumpers, but I always advice windows seeing as I don’t want people to ruin their top coat) as well as wooden furniture.

When working with Flex, you’re going to need Transfer tape, basically, you’re pulling your colourful foil off the backlayer, and using the transfer tape to put it onto the object of your desire. The options with Flex are quite literally endless. You can just as easily put your design on paper as you can put it on the fridge. Higher quality foil makes for a more enjoyable experience all around, especially the transfer tape, so do spend the additional bucks and save yourself the hassle of screaming and crying because the cheap stuff won’t do its job properly.

If you’re more interested in making designs to put on fabric (think about shirts, hoodies, etc) you’re going to want Flock or Vinyl foil. Vinyl is thinner, where as Flock is a bit thicker, and gives a puffy look to your design.

When working with either Flock or Vinyl, you’re going to need a heat press. You’re going to ‘iron’ on the foil onto your fabric. A heat press ranges from 80 euros, to 500 euros. It all depends on how often you’ll be using it, how much space you have, etc. The one I got is the super small Cricut Easypress Mini, mostly because it was 80 euros... where the next step up was 200 euros. The mini is advertised as allowing you to make smaller things like socks, or shoes, but with a little bit of patience, you can make larger projects just as well! Simply put, we out here hustling and bustling! 

Both types of foil come in a multitude in colours as well as patterns. From glitter to mat, to leopard print to metallic. Pricing ranges from 1 euro to 4 euros for a meter. When I first started out, I bought packs of foil. They didn’t let me pick colours, but it was a cheaper way to get a multitude of foils in my house without getting decision fatigue.

You have your machine, you have your foils... time to create! Not so fast there, buddy! 

With the machine I have, I can’t just ‘feed’ the pieces of foil into it. It needs to be loaded up onto a cutting mat.

You can get these in various types of stickiness. For foil, use a light stick mat. These range from 25 to 40 euros depending on the size and where you buy them from (I have one that’s 30 by 30cm, and one that’s 30 by 60cm for bigger projects.)

Basically, you stick your foil onto this mat, and load it into the machine. From there, the blade is going to do its work, and cut out the design for you. It’s going to come out looking roughly like this (this is a design I once made to test things out, it’s not as well done as I would have liked, but it was a trial run)

You can see the lines where it cut through the foil (this was Flex, in case you’re wondering) It’s now time to pull away the excess, and see how the shape opens up for you. This process is called weeding and you generally use a hook for this  -  once again, I’m poor and crafty so I use a needle... no, I can’t make this up I promise.

Now, you just peel away all of the excess that’s still left inside. Seeing as this was a large design scaled down onto a small piece of foil... this sucked. this took me forever and a day and a lot of the details were lost. But hey, that’s how you learn, right?

As you can see, you do have shapes and you can somewhat see what it’s supposed to be, but the foil itself gives you some limitations, in the sense that you can’t really make use of a hue inside of it.

Anyway. I didn’t take photos of this, but I did the whole process again, except now in blue with the colours inverted, stuck transfer tape onto it, and then yeeted it against the glass of a photo frame.

I made this design in photoshop based on a photo  -   but even if you don’t have any photoshop knowledge, a lot of plotters come with a program that allows you to design your stickers in there. These also come with pre-loaded shapes and fonts just to make it a bit easier!

This is just the basics of everything, and like I said before, I’m by no means a pro. There are a lot of things you should consider before investing in a plotter, but if you’re looking into a neat little hobby that allows you to make stuff for yourself, friends and loved ones? Yeah, I highly recommend a plotter.

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

Feel you big time on the wedding thing

For one thing like... why spend a small fortune on one day when you can take that money and try to use it to set yourself up for better days? If I am gonna blow a lot of money, why not use it on a honeymoon so we can have a nice trip together?

If I were to do it what I'd want is to either learn to make the rings, or hire and artisan to do it with lab grown gems. Same for the outfits, either learn to make something I'll like using another day, or hire an artisan to make it custom. Then do something in the backyard

Sure there's people who really wouldn't like that, but honestly we probably would be a bad romantic fit for each other

Like I said though it's like why stress, why spend a ton of money? Save that stuff to make the rest of your life together better. No need to peacock, the other people don't matter. Do something nice and fun for both of you, but keep it simple for your own sakes

That's my untested thoughts on this stuff

I think I share most of these thoughts!

When wifey and I got married, I had just graduated from college (literally like a month before) and she was just approaching a year at her first career-based employment (as opposed to seasonal temp work before that) so we really didn't have the ability to pay for a proper Jewish wedding, nor the time to DIY one. I wasn't on speaking terms with my family either so there was no support there financially, nor was there the ability to supply me with important cultural or heirloom items that would have helped bridge the gap between a state wedding and a spiritual one.

Wifey's family was so welcoming and provided everything they could to make our wedding beautiful, and just a few years later my BIL and his fiance who attended our wedding together held their own wedding in the same field behind his aunt's house with more food and guests and lots of little munchkins to keep their sons company on the big day. It was the best wedding her family could offer either couple, and no one was unhappy with that. I don't think either wedding cost the family as a whole more than $500, and that was still a lot for any of us given our incomes, so imagining a world where we spent more feels....hard somehow. What would we have done, taken out a loan?

I dunno. I see people agonizing over how to hold a wedding with "only" 200+ guests and just sort of....feel a little uncertain about what people thought of my wedding. Did they think it was sad we didn't have more guests? Did they think we were cheap for getting married in clothes we'd owned for years? Did they think our marriage wouldn't last because our promises weren't made before g-d? I dunno. I would have liked a wedding where I felt financially able to do the things that mattered to me. But I just have a hard time figuring out how two young people just starting out are supposed to manage that when the families don't come together to make it happen.

Personally, my hot take is that weddings should be thrown for the new family by a chosen trusted loved one. The soon-to-bes and their families come together to make a budget and then hand control over to the person the soon-to-bes trust to throw them a wedding, and they should have no further responsibilities.

I liked that about my wedding. All I had to do was find my JP and my cake, and my MIL and wifey's aunt took care of everything else for us. They would ask our opinion from time to time, but they arranged a wedding that we, as the newly weds, could simply attend and enjoy.

There are probably other ways to arrange that, and I'm sure it's at least some of the point of the wedding party members in a more typical wedding, but I still feel like in all the obsession of "having the perfect day" it stops being something that the people doing the getting married are meant to enjoy.