#It's funny

[canisalbus]

Sighthounds are so sleepy by nature it just makes Machete even funnier that poor guy must be absolutely EXHAUSTED beyond regular standards. The greyhounds around him are baffled that he stays up all night working.

[inkskinned]

there's a video on instagram of a man kicking his partner's door in. the top comment is (with over 4 thousand likes): "how about you tell us what you did to make him that angry?"

barring emergency, nobody should be kicking anybody's door in. many of us lived in houses where it was always, somehow, an emergency. there is a strange, almost hysterical calm that comes over you in that moment - everything feels muted, and you almost feel, however incongruently, like you should be laughing. you are living inside of "the emergency." oh my god, you think. i am now a fucking statistic.

there is another comment with 2.8 thousand likes: "if this was a woman doing it to a man, nobody would give a shit."

do people give a shit now, though?

barring emergency, the door should remain standing. the emergency should be panicked, desperate - "i'm coming in there to protect you." many of us know what it feels like when the emergency is instead "i'm coming in there to get you."

1.5k likes: "and yet you post this for notes. glad to see being the victim has become your whole personality."

hysteria is a word connected to womb, from greek. what you're experiencing is so senseless and inhumane that you (a rational creature) try to find any ground within what is irrational and cannot be explained. one of the most frustrating things about staying in bad situations is that we also lie to ourselves. we also ask ourselves - wow. what did i do?

women can be, and often are, also abusers. abuse is not gendered. abuse is not just a "straight person" problem. abuse does not have a face or figure or sexuality. you cannot pick an abuser out of a crowd. an abuser could be actually anybody.

and then so many people rally behind the man kicking the door in. here is something nobody should be doing, right? you want to ask every person that liked that first comment: do you ask this because you side with him? do you ask this because it helps you feel safe from this ever happening?

in some ways, you're weirdly sympathetic to the top comment, because it is the same logic you see frequently. the idea is that the average, normal, sane person doesn't just break down a door. doesn't just shoot up a school. doesn't stalk and kill women. doesn't threaten sexual assault. doesn't run over protesters. doesn't shoot an unarmed black person. doesn't scream at underpaid walmart employees. doesn't just "lose it". something had to have happened, right? because the default (white. straight. cis.) - that is someone who is always, you know. "sane."

(right?)

on a podcast, you hear a sane, normal, rational person. "if you piss me off, i'm going to need to hit something. sorry but i'm not apologizing. that's just who i am that's how it is." his voice almost sounds like he's laughing.

you think of the door, and how you were almost laughing behind it, too. ironically, every real emergency in your life has almost felt peaceful in comparison. fire, car accident, flash flooding - these felt quiet, covenant to you. you'd stood in all of them, feeling them pass over and up to your chin, never actually overwhelming.

but when the door was coming down, you had felt - is there a word for that? there has to be, a word, right.

surely one of us has figured out the word for that, i mean. it's such a large fucking statistic.

[toonstarterz]

I've been told I have very lesbian tastes for a dude.

Like this shot of Marcille unfurling her hair with bloodied hands while looking disheveled, barefoot, and desperate in her moral ambiguity has done more to me than any big-tiddied embarrassed anime girl has ever did.

[artyphex]

Do you think Angel refuses to do any shoots involving swimming pools/bathtubs/showers not because he can't swim or hates water but because when he gets wet he just looks like this

and there's no way to make that sexy

[glitter-stained]

Being a Jason fan is hilarious because ever so often you'll find what I call a jason roulette post where the author could have just as well been a jason todd fan, a jason todd hater or certain iterations of jason todd himself. Such examples may apply:

> Have people all collectively forgotten all the shit Jason's done? Like, that guy is legitimately a mass murderer how do we keep forgetting that

> Jason Todd should have stayed dead

> I feel like Jason Todd should kill himself

> Since Jason thinks Batman should kill murderers maybe Bruce should just kill him

> God I hate dc comics and what they've been doing with Jason Todd

> Jason Todd should have remained a villain

> Jason Todd should hate himself tbh

> *Surprise tentatodd screenshot sneak attack*

[piowasthere]

I'm sorry, i really am but- @achickennamedcheese @librarian-computer wtf.

i mean- i enjoyed reading all that but these were some fun notifications

(it's taken from reblogs of this post, just for context)

[ruthariandbluecookies]

Rayla: *sneaks in through the window at 3 am*

Ethari: *flicking on the light and turning around in his chair* So, where were yo- *cut off by his chair spinning too far*

~Awkward silence~

Ethari, fixes his chair: *coughs* So, where were you?

Rayla, knows Runaan goes on late walks: I was out training with Runaan!

Runaan: *spins around in his own chair and stops perfectly* Want to try that again?

[dangan-radio]

komaeda would make a really good elementary school teacher because he's patient and really good at leading people towards conclusions without outright giving them the answer but by nature of being komaeda nobody will ever give him this job on purpose

[batedible]

i've got so much more

(first, third)

[nobody-nexus]

Logic VS Determination

CW Suggestive

Admittedly this was a lot funnier in my head, but I still think it's funny

[sabrondabrainrot]

Art Trade with @kittysimp-daycareauart

Had a ton of fun working on this!!!!

I asked KttySimp what they wanted and they asked for Eclipse and Sun!! They drew for me Sun x Dark Sun! Truly glorious ships.

Had tons of fun working on this.

Hearts and Kisses!

I think Tumblr will eat the quality so closeups under the cut!

Also Link to Kitty's art!

Open it!!!

I thought it'd be funny if Eclipse did a suplex to Sun. He's super downbad for Sun but won't admit it. So suplex. Fighting is their love language.

Drew glow mindscape Eclipse and had fun coloring him!

Thanks again on the wait Kitty, I've had a really long week!

[reality-detective]

LOL 😂😂😂

[humanfox030]

Wit's insults wouldn't work on me only because I wouldn't hear half of what he said thanks to the wonders of Auditory Processing Disorder, and the second half would be lost to me zoning out midway through the conversation

[xanderindisguis]

Some stupid silly stuff I made

[anxietygremlin7]

blaze-hybrid Tango giving Jimmy head

call that a

*blowtorch*