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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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Oh…. Well, it’s over for Crunchyroll I guess
#Crunchyroll#piracy#funimation#money hungry ass streaming service#rambling#I’ve never paid for a streaming service in my life thank god#I appreciated using others accounts but I personally cannot see myself paying this much for a service if I had the funds 😭!#get back to pirating kings!!!#anime has always been one of the easiest forms of media to pirate anyway so y’all got this#CR is definitely not worth paying for though#CR is certainly not worth paying this much for even if it’s a yearly one time fee#capitalism#the fact that CR has always had pretty bad quality as a streaming service anyway#it buffers every time you pause or rewind anything
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the names of certain mob-involved trans women have been changed
#i should do more dumb comics from My Life#i just always forget the funny things lol#also they take very little time since i put very little effort in uwu#also im not short my mom is just like 6 ft 2 leave me
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lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)
if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.
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no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.
I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.
I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.
If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.
#cw: suicidal ideation#cw: suicide#cw: self harm#cw: mental health#cw: depression#i made the balloon the main representation of my self destructive urges for a reason but im not going to explain it#i tried to keep a lot of the details in this vague#it would be my worst nightmare if this comic encouraged someone to hurt themselves#so. please dont#for a long time even the thought of making this comic felt so insipid and narcissistic#with the state of the world as it is#having the only threat to your life be yourself felt so privileged and trite and shameful#but doing this comic made me sit down and process things in full#and im just. very grateful i didn't give in to my thoughts back when i sincerely felt i'd be more useful to the world dead#i also feel the need to say that this wont represent everyone's battle with mental illness. its unfortunately different for all of us#there is no fix-all#and im afraid this might be one of those comics that either resonates a lot or misses the target by a mile#i made it for myself foremost. and now that its done im glad i did it#thank you for reading#and please stay alive#stillindigo art#stillindigo comics
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(✿◕‿◕) die (ꈍ ꒳ ꈍ✿)
#MY GIRLLLLLLLL <333333 you're doing amazing sweetie kill them all you deserve to#anyway. coping mechanism. the problems in my life i could solve if society just let me have a death note#this show really is an exercise in patience and suffering i get SO squicked out#by how much the horrible characters and situations mirror the insanity of what's happening in real life#also the revelation that some of the actors are Exactly as shitty as their characters are is. ugh.#but every time i'm like okay i can't take it i need to stop to protect my headspace#i think of kimiko and am like.... no... i need to see my gir....#hope karen gets jucy roles in other shows too PLEASE#the boys#kimiko miyashiro#karen fukuhara#theboysedit#tvedit
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it really works! source: me
#comic#sona#self portrait#art#sketch#i actually like myself for like the first time in my life :)#i got a little black mock neck crop top and its life changing
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guess who finally finished the main part of their final and can now draw poolverine without feeling guilty?? It is I!!!
#been working on my book non stoo for like 2-3 months and I sent it off to print yesterday#i still have some things left to do but I do finally have some time for other things again!!#woooo!!#so take this poolverine wip#they have taken over my life#deadpool#wolverine#poolverine#WIP
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RANDOM DASHBOARD INSPECTION!
#game changer#dropout tv#brian david gilbert#every time bdg is on a dropout show it adds a year to my life.#man this latest ep was so good
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why is religious Christmas imagery all so joyful and pleasant? where is the inherent horror of the birth of Christ? A mother is handed her newborn child, wailing and innocent. Her hands come away sticky. Red. Simply by giving her son life she has already killed him. He is doomed from the beginning. Her love will not save him from suffering. Because the thing cradled in her arms is not a baby, it is a sacrifice: born amongst the other bleating animals whose blood will one day be spilled in the name of what demands it. the night is silent with anticipation. Mary, did you know? That your womb was also a grave?
#instant conversation enders for my multiple youth pastor cousins#don’t say it (I’m gonna say it)#The Child is The Price#but i mean come on#as someone who isn't actually even christian the real-life historical version of this is still cursed as fuck#i mean we know that jesus was a person who existed. whatever circumstances he was born in#its terrifyingly ominous to imagine being so unaware of the affect your child will have on the future of humanity#time itself will one day be counted around your birth of him#and all because he will suffer an excruciatingly painful death that you will not be able to prevent#not only that. but regardless of his or your intentions#regardless of whether there is a god#for millenea unfathomable millions will have blood spilled and will spill blood in his name#atrocities will be committed that you cannot even conceive of#and all on his and your behalf#you love your child. its beautiful. but there's horror in what you've done. because everyone else will love him too#and what's more dangerous than that?
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Keep thinking about that one scene in secret life
#it was so silly i've had this visualised in my head for ages#actually sick of this comic now tho the colouring made me question tf I've been doing for 10 years#anyway#the sillies#not set on any of these designs btw and Scott isn't in his band outfit BC he isn't part of it yet in the series#which is the excuse I'm using bc I haven't solidified that design yet#tag time#secret life#life series#scott smajor#smajor1995#trafficblr#jimmy solidarity#goodtimeswithscar#this probably the second comic I've ever finished ever so#IM LEARNING OK#fandumb fanart#ALSO ALSO guess where I got the death messages the
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Pride Eeveelutions!
Edit: now as stickers!
#Pokemon#Eeveelutions#pkmnart#Pride Eeveelutions#Pride#my art#Free to use as icons!#I always try to make icons of these guys every year but I lose steam halfway so I have like 4 icons every time dcfvghb#BUT THIS YEAR I POWERED THROUGH#People who says nice things over these designs I owe you my life#Pride Flareon#Trans Vaporeon#Enby Jolteon#NB Jolteon#Lesbian Espeon#Bi Umbreon#Aro Leafeon#Pan Sylveon#Ace Glaceon#now also as stickers!
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guys with their respective bugs
#wild life smp#trafficblr#life series#wild life spoilers#tangotek#ethoslab#bdoubleo100#ldshadowlady#smallishbeans#jizzie#man thats a lot of tags#my art#eydidraws#i wanted to draw ren's bard moment as well but i ran out of time#anyway who's BETting on them being the first one out? :D#traffic smp#mcyt
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They’re going to the movies
#good omens#art#illustration#my art#aziraphale#crowley#ineffable husbands#good omens fanart#my new favorite thing is drawing Crowley looking at aziraphale admiring something like 🥰🥰#they’re seeing life of Brian for the first time after the lockdown is over#aziraphale is so excited dhgsgshsj
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No you’re not hearing me. It’s the way that entire gala is referencing this panel. He’s canonically cosplaying Viktor Nikiforov. It’s all from the halloween party comic. Are you listening. Do you hear me. They healed them. This panel was the only gumlee moment for like 7 years. Do you understand.
#gumlee#adventure time#am I insane for remembering this#prince gumball#Marshall Lee#Fionna and cake#this is my life#Fionna and cake spoilers#THEY NEVER FINISHED THIS CONVO BTW WE JUST NEVER WENT BACK TO THAT#yuri on ice
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Took a long time to complete my first run, so it's only right to celebrate it by doing an equally long piece of the companions 🫶
#baldur's gate 3#bg3#pspsps boo is flipping off tara#tav#shadowheart#lae'zel#gale dekarios#minthara#tara#karlach#jaheira#wyll ravengard#minsc and boo#halsin#astarion#bg3 durge#owlbear#scratch#everyones here#this is the most characters i've done rendered in my life whew.. talk about casting time#artists on tumblr
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me and senshi: i've only had izutsumi for one day but if anything happened to her...
also.... she has nekojita (cat tongue) ;___;
#KITTY#catgirl of all time#i love how they animated all her little cat mannerisms...#also this is one of my fave senshi episodes and also another one that proves why he's the heart of this show#if i had a senshi in my life i'd be 250 per cent saner. i'd take better care of myself.#izutsumi#marcille donato#senshi of izganda#senshi#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#spoilers#dungeon meshi spoilers#anime#manga#cats#cats of tumblr#long post
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