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blankblankityblank · 4 years ago

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Just, don’t wake up

Hi everyone! This is my fic for the @starkerkink exchange, dedicated to @vaguekiwi! I really hope you enjoy it :)

Pairing: Peter Parker x Tony Stark

High school AU, with superpowers.

Tony’s home life has never been amazing, but one night, it’s just too much for him. He flies blindly to the first destination he can think of in his battered suit, holding his breath when he realises exactly who’s house he’s flown to. He doubts this evening will be normal, especially when he realises there’s only one bed.

Warnings: Masturbation, Flogging, Name-calling, Restraints, slightly dub-con, both 17. Check ao3 for further warnings!

Read on ao3!

Tony arrived late to class, as usual. Peter sighed, the usual thought flitting through his head: How does he always manage to arrive late, even with a full body suit that flies?

The teacher for their class, AP Bio, glanced at Tony unimpressed but unsurprised-this was a regular occurrence, and it showed.

Tony waltzed to his seat with the usual I-really-don’t-give-a-shit attitude, plonking down and prompt executing a yawn. Peter rolled his eyes; did he always have that look on his hot face? How did he even get into AP Bio when he didn’t even pay attention? Oh yeah, that’s right-Howard Stark’s son, prodigy at 4, bla bla bla. Peter needed a break from the constant ‘Tony Stark made his own suit’ fawning that half the girls, and guys, constantly exhibited. Like yeah, big deal-was anyone gonna talk about Peter’s amazing skills to do with web fluid? Or crafting his own suits, which, well, didn’t always go particularly well?

“And today, we will be taking a bit of an off-topic turn into some neurobiology! Chemicals and hormones produced by the brain!” The teacher sang, trying to mask her own boredom with the unresponsive class, “who can tell me what the four main hormones to do with happiness contain?”

Peter shot his hand up, excited that he for once knew the answer to the question before smart-ass Tony.

“The four main chemicals are endorphins, dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin, often abbreviated as D.O.S.E,” Peter stated. Tony slowly turned around in his chair, and glared at him. Peter just smirked. ‘One day,’ he mouthed at the growingly frustrated classmate.

“Very good! Can someone tell me what each of these hormones’ functions are?” Their teacher again asked. Peter’s hand shot up for the second time, his mouth forming a smirk in sync.

--------------------------------

“Well well well, if it isn’t smart-ass Parker in a sticky situation?” Tony purred, his smooth voice richoeing off of the poorly-designed science lab. Peter sighed, closing his eyes in preparation before facing the problem.

“Does it look like I don’t know what I’m doing? Wouldn’t wanna steal your thunder now, would I?” He snarked back, trying to stir his web fluid in peace. The teacher had allowed his class 15 minutes of time to work on their various powers, any tweaks or fixes being attended to. Tony had apparently finished oiling up his suit, but Peter had no such privilege.

Tony flicked the back of Peter’s head as he strutted away, going over to talk to Steve and Bucky. Goddamned overpowered mutants. Ok, so maybe Peter was a tiny bit jealous of their friendship, but that was his business.

He dispensed the web fluid with a sigh, getting ready to pack up and head back to his apartment, and hopefully blow off some steam with a Star Wars movie night. He smiled softly to himself; maybe the day wouldn’t be so bad after all. He could chill with may, have some hot chocolate, quote every line of Empire Strikes Back because he totally doesn’t know it word for word.

The bell rang, immediately followed by a cacophony of bags zipping, several whirring sounds as various students fired up their ride home. Peter ducked his head down, knowing his power wasn’t as rich or powerful as his classmates’ privileged ones. And they didn’t even know it, how lucky they were. They’d never know what it’s like to be born with stickiness and a general strength upgrade. No super-advanced knowledge of tech, engineering, how to fly, being able to fly...everything that separated him from the rest of his peers.

Peter swung his backpack over his shoulder, cursing as his AP Bio textbook dropped onto the ground, setting off a too-loud thump on the concrete floor. A few heads swivelled in his direction, and Peter flushed as he hurriedly picked the offending book up, and returned it to its rightful place. Face still hot, he all but rushed out of the classroom, eager to change into his suit and get this day over with.

“Hey! Parker! Wait up, for fuck’s sake. You dropped two books, not one, you blind-ass bat,” Tony hollered, his feet slapping against the linoleum. Peter grabbed the exercise book from Tony’s offering hand, not dignifying the teen with a response. Ok, so maybe it was a bit harsh. But he had to stay ice-cold around Tony; if it got out Parker had a crush, it would not go down well. At. All.

“You’re not even gonna say thanks?” Tony spluttered in disbelief, hand still outstretched.

“Nope,” Peter replied, popping the ‘p’.

“Pretty sure I deserve some recognition, I could have just left that book on the floor for some other snotty-nosed kid to find,” Tony said indignantly, hand returned to his side.

“Well then don’t do it next time. I don’t give a shit, Stark,” Peter fired back, attempting to quell his progressingly noticeable butterflies.

Tony opened his mouth in a retort, but instead opted for an eye roll and spun on his heel. Probably to get back to his fancy 5 star penthouse, Peter thought bitterly. He headed to the bathrooms, diligently fighting his instinct to catch a glance of that ass. God, he was so, so gone.

-------------------------

Peter entered his apartment silently, not wanting to disturb May. He kicked off his shoes, deflating his suit and carrying the rest of his belongings to his room. Or, his cave, as May liked to call it. The 16 year old dungeon was another favourite of hers.

“May? ‘M home..” He trailed off when the bright Post-it note caught his eye. He frowned, peeling it off the bench and reading the bubbly handwriting. ‘Picked up an extra shift, be home tomorrow at 7! Sorry I couldn’t make it tonight kiddo xx’ Well. He could kiss his plans of venting to may goodbye, it seemed. Hot chocolate and a movie night still lifted his hopes, albeit less enthusiastic with no one to share it with now. The teen hummed the Star Wars theme song as he boiled the water and got his hot chocolate ready. He finished his task from earlier, dumping his stuff in an impossibly messy room that cleaning seemed impossible. There were things he didn’t want to uncover by doing so.

The TV flickered to life, selecting the chosen movie as directed by Peter. He sipped on his hot chocolate, swearing softly when the liquid burnt his tongue. It’d probably need to cool, considering the loss of feeling in his taste buds. The TV screen suddenly paused the movie, indicating the buffering icon as the infuriatingly slow loading bar popped up.

“For fucks’ sake…” Peter muttered, deciding to take a quick shower to pass the time. He didn’t bother getting clothes, seeing as he was the only one home. He padded to the bathroom, turning the shower on and watching as the water slowly began to produce steam. He then stripped, chucking his clothes into the overflowing hamper and stepping into the soothing water. He let it wash over him, adjusting himself to the temperature as he scrubbed himself with vanilla soap, the day’s events flicking hazily through his mind.

The teen looked down, noticing his growing hard-on. Maybe his thoughts about Tony had taken a...darker turn. He palmed himself half-heartedly, almost jolting when the spark of arousal ran through his body. He groaned softly to himself, putting more energy into pumping his hard on. His precum provided lubricant, his hand going up and down faster and faster until he was right on the edge and it felt so good, and-

Peter pulled his hand off, letting his erect cock bob helplessly in the air. He was breathing hard, not having reached his orgasm. It just...it didn’t feel right. He rubbed soap on his body again, his dick slowly returning to it’s normal size.

The shower came to a close after 15 minutes of staring at the wall, he may or may not have been thinking about a certain black head of hair, brown eyes flecked with gold, the body of a Greek god...maybe he lost track of time, but it was time well spent in Peter’s opinion. He towelled himself off with less energy, suddenly losing the motivation to actually dry himself off-probably because all his brain power was used trying to figure out a certain someone’s personality.

He plopped onto his nest of blankets and pillows, smiling when he saw the movie was ready to watch again. He hit play, content with the world at last.

That is, until some fucking idiot banged, not knocked, banged, on Peter’s door. He resolutely ignored it, turning the volume of the TV to max. Until, the banging didn’t stop. It just kept going. And going. And going-

“This better be a real good fucking reason,” Peter snarled, pausing his movie with more force than he probably needed to, and he stomped to the door.

The assault on the door didn’t stop, even when Peter yelled ‘Coming!’ to try and ease the banging. It did not succeed. He swung open the door, fuming, the epitome of annoyance as expressed on his face. He was ready to give this newcomer a piece of his mind, what, interrupting his fucking movie night, the audacity-

The words died in his throat as he looked up to launch a deadly glare, only to be met with chocolate brown eyes, flecked with gold, a soft pink cupid’s bow, the presence of stubble beginning to form a goatee, and oh wait, he’s seen this before, wait a minute-

“Tony?” He spluttered, taking a step back as he took in the scene before him. Tony, in a banged up suit he probably used as his transportation, his hand poised to bang at the door again. Tony’s expression mirrored Peter’s, a mixture of shock and confusion. Unlike Peter’s, Tony’s cleared quickly, and formed a new expression-one of almost desperation.

“Look, Parker, I’m sorry alright? I just...I need somewhere to stay tonight,” he rubbed a hand over his face, “forget it. I knew it was stupid to come, sorry for wasting your time I guess,” he muttered, already pivoting on his heel. Without his conscious consent, Peter grabbed Tony’s arm as he turned away. They both froze, neither knowing what Peter did.

“Wait, I...you can stay, Tony. You can come in, I just was watching Empire Strikes Back,” Peter ranted, gently tugging Tony inside. The latter seemed to be in a state of shock, obviously not expecting the positive response.

“Empire Strikes Back? You would be watching that, of all movies,” Tony snarked, recovering quickly from his bout of shock.

“You’re the guest, at least try to be nice,” Peter countered, blushing at the tips of his ears from embarrassment. He huffed, flopping onto his comfortable collection of pillows. He raised an eyebrow meaningfully at Tony, who looked a little out of place with his scratched suit. Peter was curious, but didn’t pry-there was obviously something that caused Tony to come in so suddenly.

“Being nice? To Parker? Talk to me when you have an achievable goal,” Tony grumbled, walking around to tour Peter’s apartment. Peter hoped it would be up to his standards. Wait, no he didn’t, Tony’s standards didn’t matter to him. At all.

Peter resumed his movie, soon becoming engrossed in the iconic plotline that he’d seen hundreds of times before, yet it never failed to make him excited. Tony watched his classmate from the shadows, the smile on Peter’s face contagious. His auburn curls, sharp jawline...Picture perfect Tony mused, as the lights from the movie danced across Peter’s angelic features. Tony shook his head, afraid of getting caught in the act-someone that beautiful would never return his feelings.

The depressing thought prompted Tony to emerge from the shadows, gliding over to where Peter was laying down and slumped nearby, resigning himself to the fact he’d have to watch this nerd movie. His suit whirred in the corner, fixing its own malfunctions as Tony had programmed it to.

“I don’t even know what the fuck is going on, Parker,” Tony muttered, the movie’s plot confusing him due to the lack of knowledge in previous films.

Peter just smiled, deciding it would take too long to explain the plot. Tony saw this, and a small smile spread across his face, too. It was nice to have a friend that just accepted you into their home, even if you had no explanation. Well, he couldn’t really tell the boy his explanation. Home was...a bit hard to go to at the moment, not that he’d ever tell Parker. He glanced at the serene expression on Peter’s face again, taking in the pure joy as he watched his seemingly favourite movie. Yeah, he was not gonna spoil that expression. Not ever.

--------------------------------

The movie’s credits rolled, signifying the end of the movie night. Tony softly blew out through his nose, wondering if it would be overstepping to stay the night. Before he could dig a hole of despair within himself, Peter noticed his obvious inner battle. Deciding to put the rivalry behind him for now, he reached out to Tony, gently touching his arm and effectively grabbing his attention.

“We should head to bed...if you’re ok with that,” Peter murmured, gently tugging Tony’s arm as he stood up.

Tony sucked in a breath at sparks of pleasure that rippled through him as Peter’s hand lingered. He got to his feet, following Peter through the apartment, taking in the few decorations and pictures. He paused at an old picture of an obviously much younger picture of Peter, sitting on a man’s shoulders. He looked so...well, happy. Tony frowned; what had happened? Not wanting to intrude, he tucked the question away for later, and hurried to catch up with Peter.

“So, this is it. The humble abode, I guess,” Peter chuckled nervously, giving a dramatic wave with his hands. Tony looked around, taking in the worn twin bed, well-read books mounted on shelves that looked as if they could fall at any minute, the stained dresser, obviously the victim of many late-night hot chocolate spills. Tony could feel a slight smile tugging at his lips-this felt like Peter.

“Humble, huh. Didn’t know you were a Potter fan,” Tony smirked, gesturing at the aforementioned books. A red blush tinted the teen’s cheeks as he rushed to defend himself.

“I’ll have you know Harry Potter is a very famous series, thank you very much,” he huffed, crossing his arms. The following silence was comfortable, Peter rifling through his dresser as he looked for his pyjamas. He succeeded, muttering a soft ‘aha’ at the victory, and turned to head to the bathroom.

“Get yourself comfy, you can sleep wherever, couch or bed,” Peter stated, trying not to blush for a third time in an hour. He made quick work of changing, exiting the bathroom once he was satisfied with his appearance. A new toothbrush smacked Tony in the back of the head, credits of Peter.

“The fuck, Parker? Why couldn’t you just ask me to turn around,” Tony muttered, grabbing the toothbrush and making his way to the meager bathroom. He cleaned his teeth, checked his face for any signs of, well, outstanding blemishes, and once satisfied, returned to the bedroom. Peter was already in the bed, having turned off the lights and receiving a wave of sleepiness that he couldn’t refuse.

Tony hesitated before quietly sliding in beside Peter, careful not to touch him in hopes of keeping him comfortable. After all, this was Peter’s bed. He shifted, finding the proximity a little too...exciting.

Peter stirred, muttering something incomprohensive that sounded suspiciously like ‘Stop fucking moving,’ which Tony grudgingly obeyed. He found himself drifting sooner than he usually did; maybe it was the company that finally got his eyes to close, who knows. It just felt good to be cared about.

--------------------------

“Fuck, harder Tony,” Peter cried out, relishing the feeling of the flogger on his burnt ass, “please. Please Tony, ah!”

Tony whipped mercilessly, painting the teen’s ass and lower back a pretty scarlet colour. He knew Peter loved it, despite the whimpers of pain as he relentlessly assaulted his body, again and again.

“Little slut, begging for me to stop like a good little bitch. Ask me nicely, I might consider,” Tony snarled, drinking in the moans that came tumbling out of Peter’s mouth at the sentence.

“P-please, I promise I’ll be your good little cockslut, please just let me go,” Peter repeated, rolling his eyes back from pleasure. His cock twitched at the constant stimulation, begging for touch, but Peter couldn’t move, the restraints preventing him from relief.

Tony growled, pausing the flogging at 15 hits. “You better live up to that, whore,” he snarled, taking in the sight before him. Peter, bound to the bed face-down, bent over the back, ass on display. His petite frame quivered in anticipation, preparing for more of the flogging.

“Yes, Tony, I promise I’ll be good, no more,” Peter begged, too aroused to care how desperate he might sound. He jerked his hips forward, trying and failing miserably to acquire friction for his painfully hard dick.

Tony untied the restraints slowly, careful not to hurt his lover any more, now that the scene was over. Peter sobbed, reaching down almost immediately to try and relieve his aching cock. Tony slapped Peter’s hand away, taking the matters into his own hands.

“Such a naughty boy, trying to touch yourself without permission. What do we say?” Tony crooned, teasing Peter’s tip. The latter cried out, grinding against Tony’s hand in hopes of release.

“‘M sorry, so sorry, please, please let me-ah!” Peter abruptly cut off his rambling as Tony took him in hand, stroking along his length tantalisingly. Peter sobbed, crying out as the feeling grew. He centered in on the sensation Tony was giving him, pumping his dick with such earnest it was almost too much, the heat building in his lower abdomen, ready to burst-

Peter woke up with a start, acutely aware of his burning arousal. Oh. Oh shit. He just had one of those dreams...about Tony. Who was right next to him. Peter sucked in a breath, his eyes going wide. He calculated his options, quickly realising he couldn’t move without waking him up.

He cursed the lack of space in the bed, horror taking over as his arousal became too prominent to ignore. He whined softly into his pillow, at loss with how to deal with the predicament. How did things go so badly wrong so soon?

As if things couldn’t get any worse, Tony elicited a groan in the silence of the room and shifted to that his hip was pressed against Peter’s...problem. He unconsciously bucked into the stimulation, immediately regretting the action as Tony groaned again and moved, if possible, closer to his dick. Well, wasn’t this just amazing.

----------------------------

Tony awoke from his sweet abyss of darkness, groaning in annoyance. What had woken him up? He thought he’d heard a whimper, but that couldn’t be right. He shuffled closer to his warm pillow, which promptly moved back against him. Tony froze; pillows weren’t supposed to move. Pillows...also didn’t have a bulge. He recovered quickly, a smirk slowly growing when he realised what had happened here. Parker was hard. So, so hard.

Tony groaned again, this time intentionally shifting against Peter’s bulge to try and gauge how exactly this was going to play out. He was met almost immediately with a response as Peter grinded against him. Tony stifled a moan; it was insanely hot, how responsive Peter was. He was obviously trying to hold back, covering his mouth as he desperately sought relief against Tony. The latter helpfully shifted again, receiving a small squeak in response. Peter’s hand snaked down to his cock, unable to hold back anymore. Tony closed his eyes, savouring this moment-possibly the only time he’d get to be this intimate with his crush, even if he was ‘asleep’.

Peter palmed against his sweats, the pleasure making his breathing uneven as he neared his climax. He felt so bad for doing this with Tony in the same bed, but he was past the point of being able to control his movements. The pressure built up inside him like a spring coiled at it’s base, as he desperately rutted against his hand, when it all became too much-and Peter went rigid. The white-hot pleasure consumed his body, racking through him in wave after wave as he tried to silently ride out his orgasm. The spurts of come soaked his boxers, but Peter was too out of his mind to care as the high slowly came down. His breathing was hard and his sweats were cold and sticky, but the aftershocks of the orgasm jerked his softening cock.

The world slowly came back to him as Peter blinked a couple times, trying to orient himself. The first thing he thought was oh shit, now I’ll have to lie in this mess until Tony wakes up.

That is, until he realised a tiny detail. Tony’s back and hip was completely covered. In. Peter’s. Cum.

Peter looked up slowly, the horror beginning to consume him. His entire body froze when Tony looked right back at him.

#starkerkink2020 #tony stark x peter parker #highschool AU with powers #vaguekiwi #promptexchange #starkerkinkchallenge #my work

16 notes · View notes

led123123 · 4 years ago

Text

https://youtu.be/Rrmy_TAQlmw

https://youtu.be/nkjpFibLAEY?t=1016

I don’t like this fatass

https://youtu.be/iRbW2eJHTUo?t=116

https://youtu.be/iRbW2eJHTUo?t=137

https://www.youtube.com/user/SSSniperWolf/videos

omg.. people still watch her videos..

she has bad lighting.. but still gets that many views..

how many flops is my card..

wow.. like.. my card half precision performance is.. the same as single precision.. but rx 6000 is double..

mine is still not bad.. rx 6800 is.. like.. 19 right??

https://youtu.be/mKC3IeldPOc?t=279

https://youtu.be/FRAEaBtP2r4?t=103

https://youtu.be/GncqbaR996Q

https://youtu.be/GncqbaR996Q?t=144

her voice makes me think about someone

I wonder who

let me guess this

https://youtu.be/GncqbaR996Q?t=93

omg. so much like someone’s voice

but I don’t know who

https://youtu.be/GncqbaR996Q?t=241

it’s sunday and someone is playing loud music somewhere.. because.. there was probably a wedding.. but that song doesn’t sound bad.. and I wanna hear it

now I wanna hear this song..

https://youtu.be/ywj9Rmr8KqE?t=21

https://youtu.be/1TaJPgLS2iY

https://youtu.be/AoH4W3Vsz-Q?t=48

https://youtu.be/BzYBkAvdCJY?t=2

this is the best exercise

https://youtu.be/a0l4KRV2YD4?t=59

pyresentu

https://youtu.be/a0l4KRV2YD4?t=301

https://youtu.be/a0l4KRV2YD4?t=544

shorto pantzu

https://youtu.be/lC-0j-5GdjU

https://youtu.be/lVCzKL_XcjA

https://youtu.be/lVCzKL_XcjA?t=22

omg I play loba this time.. so easy to get so much loot with loba

https://youtu.be/rk7kpcDOa8c?t=90

my nail is growing straighter this time.. and.. like.. ye I think I lost some weight.

because I don’t have to eat what my mother tells me to eat

because she cooks like.. fat food.. and.. always tells me to eat even when I’m not hungry

and.. I was like.. I mean.. yeah.. I think I’m losing weight. I think I lost weight since.. that time that I gained a lot of weight

I only noticed that.. when I was like.. started eating lighter food for few days

cake is not super fat.. that’s also good food to eat for me I think

mostly like.. rice.. is the lightest food I ate yesterday

it has a lot of water

I’ve been like.. eating a lot of pasta.. corn flakes.. and.. potatoes (as french fries) and rice..

but rice is the lightest food to eat

potatoes taste good.. but.. it’s like.. not good to eat a lot of them.. like.. I need to eat like.. vegetables.. together with them.. french fries.. I can eat them without vegetables of course...

https://youtu.be/pDhTrvq3Oog?t=155

https://youtu.be/eeXXz_qTXVM

https://youtu.be/eeXXz_qTXVM?t=154

https://youtu.be/eeXXz_qTXVM?t=54

is this like the only korean song that I read translation

recently I checked other song.. translated lyrics

and it was also not what I was guessing

there was like. one more song that I was trying to guessing..

and my guess was also bad.. which song was it.

https://youtu.be/o-OrWu4KFrw?t=27

lol.. he picks support in forest??

https://youtu.be/3K6KpkFXKdM?t=339

https://youtu.be/3K6KpkFXKdM?t=483

sounds irish

that’s this song.. but I don’t know the name..

I know this song I mean.

https://youtu.be/HGFh4IjX5Pk?t=269

https://youtu.be/7ZYcb57btNU?t=238

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDFkIE5-GDM&lc=UgwnYC4YfIutrfdfMK54AaABAg

guys watch my comment

https://youtu.be/HGFh4IjX5Pk?t=223

https://youtu.be/ES2TOpipTMk

https://youtu.be/ES2TOpipTMk?t=34

imba

https://youtu.be/ES2TOpipTMk?t=94

loot is like.. first most important thing.. 2nd one is hitbox

https://youtu.be/DxamRK10KNU

https://youtu.be/HGFh4IjX5Pk?t=235

so I could like.. stream.. 6k.. or.. like.. lower resolution

but I can’t stream and record at the same time

https://youtu.be/HGFh4IjX5Pk?t=460

https://youtu.be/HGFh4IjX5Pk?t=230

https://youtu.be/6JvON_fjaiY?t=1261

another solo win

he has like.. 3 more years.. at most. that’s good at least

https://youtu.be/HGFh4IjX5Pk?t=26

disco bania.. xD

https://youtu.be/K0Wf6lYb5to

wow. I was playing.. no.. before that I was playing wraith..

https://youtu.be/K0Wf6lYb5to?t=40

just put shop. get nades and win

https://youtu.be/K0Wf6lYb5to?t=103

https://youtu.be/HGFh4IjX5Pk?t=223

https://youtu.be/IvAx7q2LKqk?t=60

yoga is also good for bloating.. true..

https://youtu.be/YL1sHRWydo8?t=23

lol.. this happened on one live show.. lol..

https://youtu.be/YL1sHRWydo8?t=43

spiderman??

https://youtu.be/YL1sHRWydo8?t=291

this music is like the music from misudeskun or idk how is her username

https://youtu.be/YL1sHRWydo8?t=349

https://youtu.be/YL1sHRWydo8?t=466

https://youtu.be/YL1sHRWydo8?t=658

she pat him to say “good job”

https://youtu.be/YL1sHRWydo8?t=733

this is not daily dose of internet am I right?

https://youtu.be/M3KKpo20tkQ?t=92

https://youtu.be/E6Y-ZucCWoU

instagramuno

letsula go!

similar music

https://youtu.be/E6Y-ZucCWoU?t=64

dansu

https://youtu.be/PCp2iXA1uLE

https://youtu.be/PCp2iXA1uLE?t=84

https://youtu.be/PCp2iXA1uLE?t=126

https://youtu.be/PCp2iXA1uLE?t=137

https://youtu.be/PCp2iXA1uLE?t=145

https://youtu.be/DxamRK10KNU

https://youtu.be/r8h9etchfYQ

https://youtu.be/r8h9etchfYQ?t=39

https://youtu.be/lVCzKL_XcjA

https://youtu.be/DxamRK10KNU

https://youtu.be/DxamRK10KNU?t=78

see how.. like.. I mean..

he’s not as good as me.. he thinks he goes solo.. on me.. and his squad was behind him.. but he couldn’t knock me

he wasn’t very good

gaming chairs.. have adjustable back.. but I still wouldn’t buy it.. they don’t have much cushion

https://youtu.be/wj9I4S35F9s?t=320

https://youtu.be/wj9I4S35F9s?t=622

https://youtu.be/lVCzKL_XcjA

https://youtu.be/GncqbaR996Q?t=347

what is this voice

https://youtu.be/qJWKGgs6Q7A

https://youtu.be/a0l4KRV2YD4?t=620

does dans mean “with”??

https://youtu.be/PyF0vXUt4mA?t=23

https://youtu.be/nkjpFibLAEY?t=1267

it’s literally so obvious who is impostor.. people in chat know that.. you can just go to someone else’s stream..

it’s so obvious..

I said that this game was a scam like.. million years ago

it’s a scam

every single person in chat can spoil it

https://youtu.be/nkjpFibLAEY?t=1452

but it’s funny how people

it’s like.. the worst game.. but people think it’s true..

ok like I guess.. youtube doesn’t keep the original file for too long..

only for some time

https://youtu.be/ReFAVWMohsg

https://youtu.be/iR0Y8JXiobc

https://youtu.be/UOH5skP1Q6I?t=19

https://youtu.be/K8n0305dZXA

I don’t like playing on touchscreen.. because the touchscreen is hard.. so I would rather use buttons..

https://store.steampowered.com/app/952040/MUSYNX/

it’s free on phone but costs 3$ on steam..

it’s also on ps4

https://youtu.be/04pwoYzbVjk?list=RDCMUCYt4edni1As9kExL9Q0YEuA

https://youtu.be/04pwoYzbVjk?list=RDCMUCYt4edni1As9kExL9Q0YEuA&t=125

ta je shu. what did I say??

https://youtu.be/q4FwKFk658c

https://youtu.be/UtvIyTaTvXc

did I eat anything today.. no.. I didn’t eat anything.. I wasn’t hungry

hungry. get it? there is a country called hungry

https://youtu.be/mOyoQW47SSY?t=49

https://youtu.be/mOyoQW47SSY?t=60

omg. french fries.. damn.. it’s.. a little late to make french fries..

https://youtu.be/mOyoQW47SSY?t=118

https://youtu.be/mOyoQW47SSY?t=180

smart. my eye was like.. watering a lot.. so it got really salty.. and it was a lot of salt..

https://youtu.be/mOyoQW47SSY?t=282

https://youtu.be/vhiaxWx23fI?t=7

https://youtu.be/EBX_znE2MMY

https://youtu.be/EBX_znE2MMY?t=108

https://youtu.be/EBX_znE2MMY?t=116

next to taipei

https://youtu.be/EBX_znE2MMY?t=111

https://youtu.be/WqKQLvy48tI?t=140

https://youtu.be/WqKQLvy48tI?t=554

https://youtu.be/d4sfvMMCfg8

should I try firefox? because this chrome is just ridiculous..

I’ll try firefox.. it should be better.. but can crash often

kinda seems like.. it’s using less ram..

not a lot less.. but.. I don’t know yet

https://youtu.be/AFiKzqlohQg

damn I would eat french fries right now.. but it’s too late to make

f*ck.. no french fries today..

asdf

https://blog.mozilla.org/firefox/firefox-uses-less-memory-chrome-edge-safari/

“Firefox aims to be the “just right” of browsers—not too hot and memory-hoggy, and not too cool-running and slow. So if you’ve experienced a memory hog at times rolling in the mud during your browsing sessions, open Firefox and add it to your browsing mix. It is faster, lighter-weight by design—a happy medium of “just right” for our users.Unless you just like having your computer heat up. And run like a tiny helicopter.“

helicopter

https://youtu.be/vhiaxWx23fI?t=27

yes.. that’s why I said that nobody is working on it

https://youtu.be/JDFkIE5-GDM?t=46

check my comment guys

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDFkIE5-GDM&lc=UgwnYC4YfIutrfdfMK54AaABAg

https://youtu.be/YMkklex2A1g

checking extensions.. for firefox

honestly.. I like firefox more.. I mean.. you can put as many tabs as you want.. and it doesn’t hide icons.. if you put a lot of tabs.. and.. you can just scroll them with mouse roll

that is better than chrome

and it’s like.. once everything is loaded.. then it’s faster.. but if you wanna load a lot of tabs at once.. lets say 50 tabs.. then you can’t do anything until everything is loaded.. damn.. I guess because everything is run in one process..

other than that. it’s faster..

https://youtu.be/EBX_znE2MMY?t=140

but it takes more time to load

I never liked chrome.. why did I ever switch to chrome..

firefox works faster.. but if you wanna load many tabs at once.. then it would lag.. for long. and you can’t do anything. in chrome you can use browser when it’s loading.. other tabs.. but in firefox not..

https://www.techradar.com/best/browser

they say firefox is best.. but slower.. a bit

“ 1. Mozilla FirefoxThe best browser for power users and privacy protection“

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Power_user

“ A power user is a user of computers, software and other electronic devices, who uses advanced features of computer hardware,[1][2][3] operating systems,[4] programs, or websites[5] which are not used by the average user. A power user may not have extensive technical knowledge of the systems they use[6] and may not be capable of computer programming or system administration, but is rather characterized by the competence or desire to make the most intensive use of computer programs or systems. “

gotta wait some time to load.. I don’t know.. like.. 5 minutes..

is there any reason to use chrome other than that.. I hate chrome..

https://youtu.be/JTErh341CSU

there had to be like.. a reason why I switched to chrome

I hate you chrome

damn these browsers use so much ram..

f*ck.. I don’t have any apples left..

https://youtu.be/gtFSNG2hwR4

https://youtu.be/HCvx-4wDrIk

https://youtu.be/S0rHU38OnTE?t=27

they don’t even have a shortcut for it

and can’t discard few tabs at once..

chrome. you know who you are

chrome extensions are trash

firefox looks better..

but it’s like.. not about the fact.. how these browsers look.. but how much ram they’re using..

they’re like.. such trash..

and extensions.. are also.. not the way I want..

omfg..

the extensions are stupid and there are no extensions that are good at all

there are no extensions that do anything useful..

they all trash

the worst thing.. is that.. like..

honestly.. like.. checking these extensions.. firefox has better extensions.. I mean... it’s better.. but it takes a lot of time to load multiple tabs

https://youtu.be/j07AzkmZCHw?t=170

“firefox good for power users”

chrome is for normies. xD

https://youtu.be/EQY93OPpDT4

https://images.app.goo.gl/Cenf7haXYKxHegkUA

https://youtu.be/cjdPPS9xdZQ?t=64

https://youtu.be/GZGYEW2ROwU?t=44

https://youtu.be/RQTIV8758wA?t=25

I like firefox more.. hope I find some extensions that do what I want

only bad thing is that it takes a lot of time to open multiple tabs..

chrome has translation.. for pages..

there’s some extension.. for firefox though.. I like firefox and hate chrome

https://support.mozilla.org/en-US/kb/xframe-neterror-page?as=u&utm_source=inproduct

but it doesn’t work that good

I haven’t used google translate that much

the extensions.. kinda.. doesn’t work.. looks like the extension doesn’t work..

https://support.mozilla.org/en-US/questions/1177556

why I ever switched to chrome.. there had to be a reason.. but I don’t remember..

ok I installed some extensions.. but these browsers.. still aren’t as good as I wish they were..

or they just use a lot of ram.. I would need like.. more ram.. or something

actually.. firefox is better.. but.. I don’t know why I moved to chrome..

maybe I should open window..

https://youtu.be/A3RPrcLreik

https://youtu.be/4X0lwIvSBnc?t=26

that’s a singing coach.. miranda sings

https://youtu.be/4X0lwIvSBnc?t=121

auto tune..

https://youtu.be/4X0lwIvSBnc?t=179

https://youtu.be/4X0lwIvSBnc?t=341

if she was like..

https://youtu.be/UOH5skP1Q6I

https://youtu.be/LJ7ntRV9t9s?t=49

https://youtu.be/LJ7ntRV9t9s?t=152

https://youtu.be/LJ7ntRV9t9s?t=164

https://youtu.be/LJ7ntRV9t9s?t=219

https://youtu.be/LJ7ntRV9t9s?t=228

https://youtu.be/LJ7ntRV9t9s?t=556

https://youtu.be/LJ7ntRV9t9s?t=681

ther’es no song that I was looking for.. maybe it’s old video before update

the only thing that I don’t like about firefox.. is ctrl+tab.. doesn’t work as good as in chrome..

http://7is7.com/software/firefox/shortcuts.html

ok there’s control page down.. that does what ctrl tab does in chrome

https://www.cnet.com/how-to/how-to-customize-firefox-keyboard-shortcuts/

0 notes

thisisheffner · 5 years ago

Text

Clubbing: ‘I can’t bear the idea that there is an age at which you should stop’ | Music | The Guardian

Nightclubbing is seen as a young person’s game. Sightings of older clubbers – such as the elderly Polish couple who went viral after a night out at London’s Fabric in 2016 – are considered a novelty. But the septuagenarian tourists – who partied until 5am – are not alone.

A recent poll by ticketing platform Eventbrite found that more than 3.7 million Britons aged over 45 go clubbing every week. The nation’s nightlife may not be in rude health overall, but certain DJs, clubs and clubbers have endured. Fabric turned 20 this year, and DJs such as Danny Rampling and Terry Farley are still drawing crowds 30 years on from the summer of love that made their name. From nostalgia nights to dance festivals, older clubbers – such as Mick Jagger, 76, spotted at gay club night Horse Meat Disco earlier this year – are finding their second wind.

Typically, clubbing loses its appeal in our early 30s; 31 is the age at which most give up, according to a 2017 survey. But for those who do keep dancing, it can be much more than just a night out. What starts as an act of teenage transgression becomes radical in middle age. We talked to six older clubbers who refuse to hang up their dancing shoes. Have they still got the moves?

‘It’s like galloping across the universe in a spaceship’

Brett, 70, and Sylvia Van Toen, 69, retirees (above)

Sylvia Our first love is hard house – it attracts a different, much younger crowd. We go to hard house clubs and festivals, after discovering psytrance at Glastonbury in the mid-90s and thinking, “This is it.” The music builds up tension; you’re waiting for this particular tune and then suddenly it drops in and you’re going yes, yes, yes! Then it carries you along. It’s a bit like galloping across the universe in a spaceship.

I got married at 18 and had children young. I was a housewife. I didn’t know a lot about music, I didn’t dance. Brett and I were in our late 30s when we got together. I had two young children and so we decided to live apart, and we’ve kept doing that. We see each other during the week but get excited about going clubbing together on Fridays. It’s like going on a date.

Brett We are very lucky. Many couples we know don’t like the same music. We go clubbing once a fortnight. It’s intense. It’s hard work. The clubs often run from 11pm to early morning. There are more afternoon clubs now, which I love.

If we go to a dance festival, we make as much effort as we can to get sleep. We take a campervan, which is good because parking tends to be away from the main field. We don’t drink alcohol, just water. We don’t do afterparties; that would hurt. We don’t have any plans to retire, though that might change as we age.

It’s a social thing. We went to heavy techno clubs and it was too dark to dance because you couldn’t see what the hell was going on. So that didn’t work for us. Dancing with other people is important. Clubbing has taught me a way of being I don’t think I would have found otherwise. I used to be curmudgeonly but I have learned a lot of acceptance from hanging around young people. There is much to admire about them. They are also complimentary and it’s a lot of fun. It gives you energy.

‘There’s no judgment: it’s utopia’

Roy Brown, 56, songwriter and club host

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I’m a Brummie lad. I went to my first shebeen [unlicensed bar] in Birmingham, aged 13. It was this small venue behind a shop with huge sound systems in dark rooms, pumping with reggae and ska music. Seeing guys and girls dancing really close to each other, the music pounding, the smell of weed, a lightbulb went off in my head. I thought, this is amazing. That’s why I’m still doing it.

I knew the music – reggae, jazz, funk, blues – because that’s what my parents played at home. My parents were Jamaican and every Caribbean house has these family gatherings with music and food and dancing. That warm place they created in their houses is what I’m trying to emulate when I go clubbing: that womb, that happiness. No one can hurt or harm you because you are with like-minded people.

I moved to London at 18 in 1981, where my cousin Claudette introduced me to a group of fashionistas and club kids. They are still my friends. My aunt lived close to a huge club called Bolts. I walked past it one evening and there was a long queue of clones: gay men dressed identically in check shirts and Levi’s 501s. I had the same epiphany as in the shebeen: I saw like-minded people.

Some of Claudette’s friends sussed me out. Juicy (real name Ronald) came up to me and said: “What’s your game then?” They took me to my first gay bar and it was full steam ahead after that. My motivation was really good music. If there were hot guys there, brilliant. Drugs were a huge part of it. The majority of clubbers were white men but the only thing that mattered was that you stuck to the dress code.

I’m still on the clubbing scene. I started out on the door at the central London club Kinky Gerlinky in 1989. Now I’m a host at the Eagle in south London, where I have my own night, Soul on Saturday. I was MC and host for a club in Ibiza a few summers ago. They fly you out Friday morning for Saturday and Sunday night. I thought, can I do this? I am not 19. I’d aged 20 years. But because of the music and the amazing time, I lost 40 more.

I grew up Methodist and clubbing is like going to church. I still go out now if a night is euphoric. It’s human nature to look for something uplifting. There’s no judgment, just inclusivity. It’s my idea of utopia.

‘That moment a beat drops and everyone’s smiling: it’s wicked’

Victoria Saunders, 50, hairdresser

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I still want to go out and listen to good music played loud. But now I’m older, I don’t want to go to a big busy nightclub. I think, I can’t be arsed, actually. You walk in and you’re told you’ve got to queue here or go here if you want to smoke a fag. I’m an adult, I can manage myself.

When I first went clubbing, it was lawless. In 1988, I was 18 and Ibiza was happening, it was the summer of love. That kickstarted it for me. When I went to Houghton dance music festival in Norfolk last year, I saw people from different points in my clubbing career. It’s nice to see people who still have that affinity.

I’ve always been more of an afterparty girl; I prefer it when all the wallies have gone home. I’d rather take my time and go out at about midnight, ease myself in and then hit a dancefloor.

Hairdressers like me are like Vikings; we can just do it. I remember coming home, having two hours’ sleep, then getting up and going to work. Now it shows more, on my face, after a couple of days. I hit Wednesday and I think, oof. But people tell me I look good for my age. I’ve pickled myself. When you’ve had so much fun and such a laugh going out, that also shows.

I go to a club called Pikes in Ibiza, where Wham! shot the video for Club Tropicana. I like to properly lose myself in music – that moment a beat drops and everyone’s smiling because they know it, that feeling of oneness: it’s wicked.

I was at a house party recently and my friend was up dancing. She said, “If I don’t do this now, I’ll be dancing in the aisles of Tesco.” It’s rare to find those moments as you get older, but 30 years of clubbing means it’s something that’s deep in you. You hear good music and you just want to dance.

‘After we scattered my stepdad’s ashes, I needed to get to Horse Meat Disco’

Amanda Freeman, 56, music publicist

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I’m straight, but I prefer gay clubbing. It started in the early 2000s, when I went to places such as the Joiners Arms in east London with gay friends. It was a completely different world.

My friend Dan opened a gay bar in east London, Dalston Superstore, in 2009; by then I had been single a long time. It was a nonjudgmental space. There was no stigma attached to being a woman of my age as there could be in a straight environment; at a straight club, I’d be lucky if they let me in.

I’ve had a couple of difficult years. My mother has multiple sclerosis and my stepfather had dementia. I’m an only child, so I’ve been juggling all of this. My stepfather died in March. The weekend we scattered his ashes, I remember thinking, when I get home I’m going out to Horse Meat Disco. If I’ve been through a tough time, going out is the way to put myself back on track.

A lot of the younger people I’ve met out clubbing have been incredibly supportive. Not to say that my older friends haven’t, but they have kids and their own stuff going on. It seems easier for millennials to make those approaches, to ask me how my mum is doing, how I am. I’ve been hugely grateful for that.

I am happy to go out on my own, which is empowering. I can go to regular places and see people I know, or chat to people I’ve not met before. The music is important. My nickname is Lady D’Amanda because I’m very forward about asking the DJ for certain tracks. I’m first on the dancefloor and get people to dance with me. It’s always done in a joyful way.

I can’t bear the idea that there is an age at which you should stop. I feel more comfortable in my 50s than I did in my 40s. I chose not to be in a relationship and nobody in this community has ever questioned that. They admire people who have ploughed their own furrow, and a club night was held in my honour in January.

I hope I am an ally. I’m a music publicist and I am always available if LGBTQ artists or acts want help or advice. I’ve suddenly acquired a tribe: the community is made up of many different people, ages and persuasions. It doesn’t matter. It’s about what you bring to it. It’s a small world but it’s a really important one to me. A doorman once said to me, “You’re an icon”. That’s a lovely thing to be.

‘Drugs aren’t my thing. Someone asked what I’d had and I showed them my sandwich’

Suddi Raval, 49, music technology teacher

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Acid house took over my life at 15, in 1986. The music was on the radio. Smiley faces – the acid house symbol – popped up on the news. House music has melodies and basslines but acid house was abstract, bendy, weird. It was like music from another world. It just grabbed my attention.

There was a week that changed my life. I was walking down the street in my home town, Ashton-under-Lyne. I was too young to go out but I dressed as if I was on the acid house scene: long hippy hair, a jumper by French brand Chipie. This guy called Kelvin came up to me. He could tell from my clothes that I was into that music and said: “You need to go to the Hacienda and the Blackburn raves warehouse parties.” I said: “I’d love to but I wouldn’t know how.” He said he’d take me, and he did.

I couldn’t believe it when I set foot in the Hacienda in Manchester. There were a couple of thousand people as into it as I was. I didn’t know everyone was off their heads, drugs were not my thing. One time at the raves, someone asked what I’d had. I didn’t know they meant drugs. I reached into my bag and pulled out my butty box, a pile of cheese and ham sandwiches and a can of Coke – you can’t dance all night on an empty stomach.

The only nights I wouldn’t go to the Hacienda were when it was closed. I’ve never stopped. As I get older, young people think I am either the DJ, a promoter or a drug dealer. I’m usually the only brown face in a club. I’ve always been in a minority; there were so few Indian, Pakistani or Asian clubbers. But I’ve always felt 100% safe.

I live in London now and go out a couple of times a month to clubs across the UK. I pick up my friend Sarah and drive to the Attic in Liverpool. It’s not about nostalgia; I go to dance to new music. It’s difficult to get back to normality if you stay up to 6am, so I don’t stay out late. I’m a teacher, so I have to function at 100%. My clubbing gives me credibility with my students. I’ve not been clubbing with them, though they’ve asked.

I met my wife when I was in London for an acid house night. She was concerned I might be into drugs. She’s come out clubbing with me, but she’s a doctor so she’s usually on call. She’s not a convert but she’s not against it. Our wedding in 2017 turned into a rave. It couldn’t have worked if she’d thought, who is this man-child obsessed with dance music?

My mum found it really cute that I had smiley faces all over my bedroom as a teenager. When I visited her up north recently, she showed me a smiley face emoji on her phone. “Look, Suddi,” she smiled, “acid!’” I said, “Yes, Mum, you are bang on! That is acid!” I was so proud.

• If you would like your comment on this piece to be considered for Weekend magazine’s letters page, please email [email protected], including your name and address (not for publication).

This content was originally published here.

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gwynvsthegames-blog · 8 years ago

Text

Cave Story - A Look Back

First off, welcome to my first major post on here! I hope you enjoy yourself! Feel free to reply, share your experiences with this lovely game!

To begin, we need to go back a bit. Back to 2004. 14 year old Gwyn is searching the internet for cool games, and has found a game with enticing graphics, incredibly high user ratings, and no one seems to be able to say anything bad about this game... A few hours later, young Gwyn is utterly transfixed by this wonderfully designed game. Unable to put the game down, they make it to an area called "Outer Wall". A hauntingly beautiful and calming song is playing, clouds are racing past in the background, a green-haired man is standing next to a dragon hatchling. The soft blue tones, lit by the moon and stars... It was a moment that immediately struck me, and stuck with me to this day. Honestly, it feels like years of me playing indie games wouldn't have happened without the memories I shared just now. That game's name is Cave Story.

If you've been playing indie games, or if you're even tangentially aware of indie games, you've likely heard of Cave Story. The title originally debuted in December of 2004, as a very niche freeware download. I remember stumbling upon the game on an old freeware gaming site, back before "proper" distribution services like Itch.io or Steam existed. The game was quirky, cute, challenging, and the music immediately wormed its way into my head nigh-permanently.

"Well Gwyn, what's so good about the game, exactly?" How kind of you to serendipitously ask me a question like that to use as a segue! Cave Story is a perfect example of a very simple set of mechanics, jumping and shooting, done in superlative form. It's often likened to Mega Man or Metroid when using a shorthand description of the game, and those are definitely apt. If you took the tight controls and satisfying sounds and effects of Mega Man, then mashed those into the exploratory and mostly freeform gameplay of Metroid, you'd have something very close to Cave Story. Personally, the best thing about the game is the overall feel. The gradual acceleration and deceleration of the main character, and the floatiness of the jumps lends to a bit of a learning curve upon starting the game. However, once you've mastered maneuvering, you'll find yourself slipping in between enemy shot patterns, and laying on the suppressing fire effortlessly. As you're blowing the cutesy enemies away, they burst like piñatas into prizes! Extra health and ammo for your missile launcher, or most importantly, experience triangles! (Affectionately called “EXP Doritos” personally.)

Speaking of experience, Cave Story has a very interesting mechanic revolving around levelling up your guns (with a max level of 3) as you acquire them! Cool! If you get hit, though, your gun will lose experience and even level down, losing power! Oh no! This set of mechanics adds a sense of depth that incentivizes not getting hit, aside from the obvious incentive of not dying.

So the game feels good to play, but tactile feel isn't the only important aspect in the overall presentation! The graphics and sound are also incredibly noteworthy, with one side feeding wonderfully into the other. Firing your weapons, hearing the punchy sounds, seeing the cartoonishly large bullets, and the abundance of particle effects surrounding the explosions... It's a wholly satisfying facet of the game that only serves to raise up the already-impressive package of the game!

Music is a massive driving force for making memories. Good and bad, memories can be painted more vividly with sound. From the iconic first few notes from Super Mario Bros' Overworld Theme, to Sonic's Green Hill Zone... All games that have stuck themselves steadfast in my mind have all had strikingly catchy and well-composed soundtracks that I will generally be found humming when I'm out and about. Cave Story is no exception to this. The music is upbeat and eclectic, with a broad range of emotions to invoke for any given moment. One of the (presumed) antagonists, Balrog, has a dopey theme befitting of his less-than-competent nature. The poor guy (toaster?) tries his best, though. I will say "Mischievous Robot", the theme for the Egg Corridor level, is probably one of my favorite level themes in the game. It's a high tempo, energizing song, and I always find myself trying to run and shoot a little faster because of that song... Which doesn't always end well for me, hah!

Really, I can sit and describe the music all day long, but here's a few recommendations from me when it comes to the Cave Story soundtrack.

Moonsong, Mischievous Robot, Last Cave, Running Hell, and Plantation. Those five are easily my favorites! Enjoy them on YouTube, or the whole original soundtrack for free from - and a huge shoutout to - cavestory.org

... Look, honestly, this whole thing is a really indulgent project for me. I'm going to gush a little bit here. This whole article gives me a chance to really talk about one of my favorite games of all time, and that's really important for me! Every time someone asks about indie games to look into, I'll always say Cave Story. Every time. I've bought it on every platform it's been released on, and hell, I had a PSP that I admittedly flashed to put homebrew applications on it specifically because someone ported Cave Story to it. That's just how much I love this game. To go even further, I've gone as far as to even study the nuts and bolts of the game and quite a while ago, I made a really extensive mod for the game. I added ammo counters to every weapon in the game, which previously only applied to the Bubbline and Machine Gun weapons. I replaced the Polar Star, the first weapon you acquire, with a custom Submachine Gun, with custom gun sprites and bullet sprites... It was pretty hardcore, to be honest! I went really far with this game!

I'll wrap this up by simply saying, please do yourself a favor of playing this wonderful labor of love by one guy. Daisuke Amaya, also known as Pixel. I doubt he'd ever get to read this, but seriously, Pixel, thank you for Cave Story. Everything from the gameplay, to the music, to the inner workings of the game is immaculate and it's a game I will never forget as long as I live. It's something so innately important to me. Genuinely, I love the characters, the setting, every single facet of the game is the standard that I will hold myself to when I finally start making something. I'm competitive as hell, and being able to surpass one of my game design idols would be a crowning moment for me.

As for where you can pick this lovely game up?

Cave Story is freeware, its re-releases aren’t. The original english fan-translated version is available from cavestory.org, but if you want to support Nicalis, and Pixel, buy the 3DS, or Steam versions! They come with added levels, challenge modes, etc! It’s great!

Anyway, thank you dearly for reading and (hopefully) enjoying the first of many articles from me! More are coming quickly down the pipeline!

#cave story #text post #appreciation post #article #indie game #studio pixel #i love this game

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ramblesandmumblesofanerd · 8 years ago

Text

Batman: Arkham Reviews Part 3 - Obligatory Origins

Warning: Lengthy Post Which Contains Spoilers

After the explosive finale of Arkham City, every fan was curious as to how exactly Rocksteady would top their previous game with the inevitable sequel. What happened after the events of Arkham City? How are the characters coping with the aftermath of the previous story? Are the villains planning an attack? Will Batman be able to forge ahead and work through whatever come his way? All of these questions and more will not be answered as a completely different company, Warner Brothers Games Montreal, will prolong our wait for the sequel we actually want and instead give us the obligatory origin story we may or may not have wanted. Will this game stand up alongside its predecessors, or will it simply fall flat? Let’s take a look at 2013’s Batman: Arkham Origins to find out.

The main story of the game takes place several years ago on Christmas Eve, when a younger, rougher Batman has begun to make a name for himself as a vigilante the GCPD needs to put down. On this evening, Roman “Black Mask” Sionis has hired eight assassins including Deathstroke, Deadshot and Bane to kill the Batman in exchange for fifty million dollars in cash. Now, for one evening, Batman must defeat these eight assassins while keeping Gotham safe through side missions. Can Batman defeat them while trying to forge an uneasy alliance with Lieutenant James Gordon and the GCPD? Well, we already have two games that show he already has, so what do you think?

Firstly, while the game certainly feels more impressive in terms of how much larger the map is in comparison to Arkham City, this is only because the game designers took the map from Arkham City, added few new areas and another part of Gotham connected by a tedious bridge. While it is interesting to see Arkham City when it was still called Old Gotham, it does feel slightly lazy in spite of the additions made to show the city in it’s prime. There are also new areas to explore in New Gotham, but only if you are willing to make the trek across the aforementioned Pioneers Bridge. Until you unlock the fast-travel mechanic, this journey will feel quite tiresome, as you are forced to glide, grapnel and repeat across the bridge until you finally make it to the other side. This may sound trivial at first, but when the story demands you repeat this task a few times you begin to realize why Arkham City was so small in comparison to Arkham Origins. Also, the city seems emptier than it really should, as all civilians (i.e. not criminals) have been ordered to stay indoors due to the overbearing presence of the assassins. While this does make sense, it makes Gotham City feel exactly like Arkham City due to the overwhelming amount of nameless criminals you will find hanging out in clusters on the streets and rooftops. This is until the aforementioned fast-travel mechanic is unlocked after dealing Enigma’s “puzzles”, which is just a loading screen that becomes tedious and actually somewhat annoying. So, this is a slightly lose-lose situation.

Speaking of exactly the same, the gadgets are a little less innovative this time around. The player is essentially given all of the gadgets they are familiar with since game one with only one new item being one from Robin’s arsenal in a DLC Mission from Arkham City, the Concussion Detonator. Even the Freeze Grenade has been reskinned as Glue Grenade, which does the exact same thing it does in Arkham City: freeze opponents/steam from pipes and create a surface to stand on in water. There are even certain gadgets that do not make any sense due to previously established context, such as the Grapnel Boost. In Arkham City, the Grapnel Boost allows Batman to grapple to a surface and use to force to launch himself into the air if the player presses a certain button. When the player unlocks this upgrade, Batman and Alfred have an exchange in which the butler reminds his master that the upgrade was in the experimental prototype stage, meaning it was just made. In Arkham Origins, which takes place years prior, you already have the upgrade. While I understand the need for this upgrade in order to make traversing the city less tedious, this make no sense in terms of context which has always bugged me.

So that’s a flop for both the map and the gadgets, but what about the characters? Well, we have a younger, more aggressive Batman not voiced by Kevin Conroy in favor of a decent performance by Roger Craig Smith working alongside a prissy Alfred Pennyworth voiced by Martin Jarvis and a reluctant James Gordon voiced by Michael Gough. We are provided with a younger Joker wreaking havoc alongside the assassins played by Tom Baker who does an impressive impersonation of Mark Hamill. We are given an amazing portrayal of Deathstroke performed by Mark Rolston, whose fight was, by far, the hardest to beat and therefore the most satisfying when the task is actually done. We’re even given a more intelligent version of Bane before he became the hulking bruiser we have seen in previous games, voiced by JB Blanc who makes the character all the more intimidating. And that’s about all the characters I actually care about. The rest of the characters, be they in the main story or in their own personal side missions feel bland and just tacked on to get die hard fans to go “Oh, look! I know that character!”. Even some of the assassins feel like tools rather than characters, such as Copperhead who uses fear inducing poison to slowly kill her targets. Sound familiar? This encounter between Batman and Copperhead is just used to explain away how Batman is always able to fight against Scarecrow's Fear Toxin. It is a shame, because I like some of these characters and I would have loved to have seen them be more developed rather than just be slapped on in order to fill the quota for bad guys in the game.

And finally, there is the bugs and other issues. Unlike previous games in my personal experience, Arkham Origins in littered with bugs and glitches which causes problems in the game for many players. The most notable is when the game will freeze in the midst of playing. This is due to the console in question (mine being a Playstation 3) trying to load the game and it’s assets while you are playing it. Sometimes the process is more than the console can take, thus causing the freeze and crash which requires a full restart of the console. Thankfully this only happened once in my experience, but there was another notable issue that occurred in a game mode that has never been used in any prior or future game in the Arkham series: multiplayer mode. On paper, a multiplayer game featuring Batman characters sounds impressive, but the execution leaves little to be desired. Unfortunately the gameplay does feel somewhat bland with the typical “Capture the Point” and “Team Deathmatch”, with the only alterations being Batman and Robin trying to take out the two gangs from the shadows and the opportunity to play as either Bane or Joker depending on which team you are assigned. The multiplayer however, before it was inevitably taken down by Warner Brothers Games, was truly a pain, as it took one forever to load into a game due to the need of three players per gang and two more players to be the Dynamic Duo. I can only assume barely anyone wanted to play the multiplayer is the simple fact that no one demanded it. When we played the previous Arkham games, we never thought about having a multiplayer mode because we were having so much fun being the Batman.

So with an unnecessary story, convoluted map, cookie cutter characters and all of the glitches, do I still recommend this game? Oddly enough, yes. While Arkham Origins is not a perfect game or even the game we wanted at the time, I still found myself enjoying the it for what it was. The story did actually have a twist or two I did genuinely get a kick out of on my first playthrough, especially with a young Joker being thrown into the mix. Speaking of whom, full props to Tom Baker for doing spot on imitation of Mark Hamill’s iconic voice for the role, as well as other actors such as Roger Craig playing the role of a young, angry vigilante who does not respect the law just yet. While, yes, there are some bland characters thrown into the mix just to make the game as immense as Arkham City, I cannot say I outright hate them as they provided a challenge in their own ways, I just did not find them as interesting as other more prominent characters or their future incarnations from the previous Arkham games. And once you have dealt with the glitches and the lack of innovation, the game does actually become enjoyable as you do want to see how certain character became the people we know them as in Arkham Asylum/City. Is the game for everybody? No. But if you are honestly curious about it, I do recommend you take a look. But for those who are not curious, we do have one more game to talk about.

Until then, never stop rambling, TM

#Batman #batman: arkham origins

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trendingnewsb · 7 years ago

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From Ferraris to flying taxis: Q&A with Liliums new head of Product Design

Munich-based Lilium, the super-ambitious company developing an electric vertical take-off and landing (VTOL) jet and accompanying “air taxi” service, continues to hire top talent to make its vision a reality. The latest new recruitment is car design veteran Frank Stephenson, who has previously worked for Ferrari, Maserati and Mini, to name but a few.

Considered one of the world’s most renowned and influential car designers in recent times, 58-year-old Stephenson’s portfolio includes iconic designs such as the BMW X5, New MINI, Ferrari F430, Maserati MC12 and McLaren P1. Now he’s embarking on adding the Lilium jet to that list.

Officially starting next month, he’ll be tasked with recruiting an entirely new design team to shape both the interior and exterior of the jet itself, as well as a design language for the company’s wider infrastructure, including landing pads and departure lounges.

In a call with Stephenson yesterday morning, I got to ask him why he’s ditched Ferraris for flying taxis, what his new role will entail more specifically and to dig a little deeper into how he thinks about design and why good design really matters. A lightly edited transcript of the full Q&A follows.

TC: I don’t know a huge amount about designing cars, let alone designing cars that can fly. Designing a modern-day car involves a heck of a lot of people and designing something like the Lilium jet again involves a whole team of people. As head of design, how does your role fit into the larger machine of building a vehicle or “flying car?”

So if you have a Michelin-rated restaurant and you’ve got to feed 100 people, you’re going to have quite a few cooks in there and the waiters and everybody else to run the machine. But the chef, the guy that’s got the Michelin stars… gets all the credit for it. But it’s all the other guys doing the work for him and he’s basically overseeing it and he’s trying to keep everything moving along the right track. That’s kind of what it’s like. I mean, I’m not probably your standard type of design director because I like to get in and cook and mix up the stuff too. I just have never been able to stop getting my hands dirty. I guess in that respect, the design directors come across often as prima donnas almost and sit back and watch the guys work and every now and then say he likes it or he doesn’t like it. But I am more of a hands-on type of director.

I like to build small teams. I don’t like huge teams because it takes a lot longer to get things done and the energy sometimes isn’t as strong with a big team as it is with a smaller team. You’ve got to work faster and much more focused and much more efficiently to get the amount of work done. So that sort of builds the steam up in the pressure cooker, but if you love design it’s absolutely the right temperature to be working at. You want to be under pressure to deliver great design. And typically if you think about a design too long, it gets watered down and loses that character, that pureness that you had at the beginning. So smaller teams tend to come up with better ideas I think, or more dramatic ideas, than huge companies with huge design teams.

I don’t set the brief because that comes from marketing, what product segment or what market segment the product should fit. So if they’re telling us to design a two-seater vehicle or a five-seater vehicle or whatever then that becomes the target of the design team to deliver in a certain time span. What I do is I meet with the marketing guys, I meet with engineering guys.

The engineering guys will lay out what we call a package, where all the critical components are for the vehicle. With a car it is typically “Where does the passenger and the driver sit? Where are the wheels and where is the engine and how much trunk or boot space are we going to have?” Things like that. And then I work around all those components with the aerodynamic engineers, suspension and everything.

What I have to do basically is get the team going with theme ideas and really innovative breakthrough ideas, because that’s what designers do. They don’t repeat stuff, they have to come up with stuff that basically moves the game forward. You’ve got to create within this design team a kind of awesome childlike creativity and emotion feeling. It takes a lot of brainstorming and inspiration. You sort of set the tone of that kind of atmosphere within design to get the designers going and then the mood gains momentum.

I’m very advanced in the way I think — I have to be because of the way design is geared, you do a lot of computer work — but I typically make sure that we all start pen on paper sketching, because that is really the only way to get a design or a spark out of your mind. If you go through a computer it loses the human… So I pretty much try to keep the design team on paper as long as possible.

The moment we come up with great ideas, we work with engineers. Typically I try to get engineers and designers working together in the same studio or very tightly together so there’s no loss of traction, and to make sure that what we’re doing can be made. We typically create scale models out of clay. We maybe do two, maybe three, different designs, and as those designs evolve one will get chosen as the favorite theme. That goes to full-scale. And then when this clay model is finally approved by engineering, and approved by finance, and approved by marketing, and approved by design, we will recommend that to the CEO and he’ll have a look at it if he hasn’t followed throughout the process, and then that product will become the model for prototyping and we’ll take molds off of it and create the real panels for the car and then it goes into production. Pretty much that’s it in a nutshell.

As a design director I have to control everything from the look to the color to the ergonomics to the feasibility of it. And then with Lilium the requirements will probably branch out over into what the Lilium port will look like that you access to get into your jet. So the whole kind of environment from an aesthetic or emotional point of view.

TC: Give me more of a sense of the relationship between design and engineering (or form and function)… Aren’t you somewhat constrained in your imagination by the science of flying?

No, that’s what a bad designer would tell you, “I’m constrained, that’s why the vehicle doesn’t look as good as it should.” But the fact is he’s getting paid the big bucks to make that thing look good and if he can’t make it look good he’s just not good enough. So there’s no excuse in my book for bad design or anything that looks bad. Absolutely no excuse. Anything can be made beautiful and should be made desirable, obviously.

We have to have constraints because safety and engineering require that. If we don’t have constraints then designers aren’t designers they’re just artists and they’re not doing the job. You can make a pretty picture but if it doesn’t work at the end of the day then you haven’t really designed anything, you’ve just drawn a pretty picture.

So in terms of constraints, yeah, but that is what makes the game so fun for a designer, that you’re working within rules and legislation and restrictions which make it a challenge. That’s why you get good-looking cars and other cars that don’t look as good. Like I said, if there is a beautiful small car, why aren’t all small cars beautiful? It’s a taste thing obviously. Some people like some designs, a lot of people like other designs. But good design is absolutely not subjective. There’s good design and bad design, and there are a lot of bad designs out there — not to knock them or criticize — but there are principles for good design that designers typically learn when they’re being educated. If you don’t apply those laws of good design then you’re not going to have a good design.

Inspiration for good design comes from a lot of different sources, but if you’re looking at inspiration from trendy sources like fashion or other types of design that are in one day and out the next then you’re not gonna have a timeless design or an iconic design. Iconic designs are typically timeless designs, they last forever. Anything that was designed iconically 40 years ago will still look great 40 years in the future. The design is so good that it just lasts and lasts and lasts. It is hard to achieve that, but if you use the right type of mental design approach then it’s achievable.

I think designing cars is not harder or easier than designing an aircraft, it’s just making the absolutely best product you can make that works well. Typically if you design something that works very, very well it looks fantastic. If you design something that doesn’t work very well then the design doesn’t matter at the end of the day. One of the interesting things is people always say that form follows function. I’ve never heard anything more ridiculous in my life because for me form equals function. If the product works well, it looks great. There’s nothing in the world that works fantastically well and looks awful, that combination doesn’t exist. Especially in nature. You look at all these beautiful animals and organisms in nature that work incredibly well, and therein lies the beauty of nature. Horses and cheetahs and all these amazing animals, nobody sat down and designed this amazing-looking animal. Evolution caused it to be absolutely fantastic at what it does, and through being fantastic at what it does, the result is the look, and that look is awesome. That same principle is how I feel about design. If you work very good with the engineers and you create optimized solutions, it’s very easy to make them look good, it’s almost inherent in that way.

TC: Regarding the Lilium jet… what is the main challenge in your mind of designing what is a new type of transportation?

My challenge — simply put — is to make the person who gets into the jet not want to get out of it. You know. Although he’s reached his destination he’ll want to do it again and again and again. The reason behind that is because all the new generations coming along after the old farts like us are basically looking for experiences. They’re not so much geared towards buying materialistic things. They love experiences. And that’s what Lilium is going to be offering, an experience and a service. And I see that as the future. For me it’s an amazing opportunity to be able to take something from scratch and develop it into a reality.

It’s always been a sort of science fiction, when you see The Jetsons, the cartoons and things… it’s like, one day, but not in my lifetime. Well, here’s news for the world, it’s coming before they know it and it’s going to be here very, very soon. And these things have to look as amazing as the technology that they’re bringing with them.

What I need to do is not just make it an incredible aesthetic joy to be in, but when you get inside one of these things you don’t want to get out of it. It’s going to be the experiences that you have when you’re inside this transportation device. If you could just take that situation of being inside a capsule, what would you want to occur there? You want to relax, you want to socialize, you want to work, you want to be entertained. All that is now incredibly possible.

I mean all the advances … where everything coming now is digital and so real that you can actually imagine something on the inside being the new wave of entertainment. So basically you’re in your private space, you get to turn it into a virtual world where you’re being transported from A to B or wherever your destination is. And within that space in time you’re in the ideal atmosphere. You’re not really sitting in a plane and just going along for the ride, which is what you do pretty much in a taxi. All the new materials that are coming about at the moment in terms of seats, flooring, lighting, buttons, displays, image projection, sounds and temperature control. You know all the things that we try to shoot into new cars as a next step for luxury, those are just going to become everyday things that are making the whole ride an incredible experience.

Regretfully they’ll be a lot shorter in duration because of the nature of the jet being you know very high-speed and all that. But it’s kind of like if you can imagine somebody who loves roller coasters they’re always at the end thinking “oh my gosh that was too quick, I want to do this thing again.” That is the kind of positive feeling you should have when you get out of the vehicle.

TC: I saw this documentary a while back that made the point that the world we live in is predominately designed by humans and therefore design can make or break our everyday experiences. As a designer, is it really difficult for you living in a world where, let’s face it, a lot of design is awful?

Some designers take it as a job. Other people just live it. And design is all about making the world a better place not a prettier place. That’s [just] a consequence of making it a better place, but making it a better place is what the end goal should be. It’s a shame that there aren’t more designers in the world thinking about making the world a better place.

TC: How did you get this job ? Did they come to you? Were you just like, “I’ve done cars, I want to do something new”?

It was fate, that thing when two separate paths suddenly collide. I think it was more like that. I’d left McLaren in November 2017, not because I was frustrated or anything like that but because I thought there was something bigger than just designing products that nobody really needs, they just desired and want. What was I doing, I was just clogging up the road networks even more and not making the world a better place, probably a more exciting place, but not socially better. And so I left with my ideas of starting my own design studio, which I’ve been sort of kicking off, in terms of how to improve the world, and then I heard about Lilium and Lilium contacted me.

It was just a match made in heaven. It met all my principles of working for an exciting and incredibly innovative company from the very beginning. To be able to establish a design department for them with a design DNA, a design language, the design team, the studio. Doing something for the future of humanity. Staying with transportation, but making it even better than it ever was. Making something science fiction reality.

TC: Are there any particular designers or designs that you can point to and say that designer or product has stood the test of time?

That’s really, really tough. I can tell you specific products for their aesthetic value but I think I have to go deeper than that because you know everybody admires different designers for different reasons. If you could put two guys together that would be da Vinci and Einstein. I mean da Vinci was probably the guy because he not only could paint and draw and all that but he was also an incredible engineer and he figured out how to make these things work and he wanted things to look great too. So if I could say one person for me it would be da Vinci more than anybody else just because the guy could paint, the guy could engineer. Anything he ever touched was absolutely amazing. He was doing flying machines way back too. I like his natural approach. I like people who are really in tune with nature because for me that’s the best inspiration we have. He came up with things that never existed before for the benefit of humanity. Pretty much. If he would have been that kind of guy today he would be the absolutely most awesome human being on earth. I’ve got tons of books on his works and him, and everything like that, just because he’s so inspiring to me.

Read more: https://techcrunch.com/2018/04/23/ferraris-to-flying-taxis/

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spryfilm · 7 years ago

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“Cobra Kai Season One” (2018)

Television

10 Episodes

Produced by: Jon Hurwitz, Hayden Schlossberg, and Josh Heald

Featuring: Ralph Macchio and William Zabka

Amanda: “What is going on?”

Anthony: “Dad is about to fight this guy.”

Daniel: “Amanda, just please go inside. This is between me and Sensei Lawrence.”

Amanda: “Yeah, you two seem to have this pretty well in hand. Just a normal Saturday afternoon, a couple of grown men about to kick each other into a pool? You know, as much as I would love to watch you and your childhood karate rival duke it out, I kind of don’t want to get any blood on the patio. So what do you say we try to resolve this over some breakfast instead?”

Daniel: “You want to go inside?”

Johnny: “I could eat.”

There is no way that this spiritual sequel to the ‘Karate Kid’ franchise, “Cobra Kai” (2018) should have worked, it was a new entry into a dead. ultimately futile series (especially after the last two entries) being streamed on YouTubeRed (a new service) with original as well as nearing sixty-year-old leads that have both been defined by their roles in the original “Karate Kid” (1984). But what the creators, producers and writers have done, wisely, is to create a story that seems as natural as the original, taking what was so great about the first one, transplanting it to a new time but in the same location with updated references as well as the use of some cunning flashbacks to the original movie, not hiding the ages of the players as well as being able to see the supporting characters of that original, including Noriyuki “Pat” Morita, Elisabeth Shueand Martin Kove. There definitely is a reliance on the original movie, the creators have taken for granted that the audience viewing this will have at least a passing familiarity with the movie, in particular the relationship between Danny and Johnny as well the pivotal role that the now deceased Mr. Miyagi played in both of their lives. In many other cases this sort of storytelling may have been a weakness but this is such a beloved movie that it does not hinder the narrative one iota, or the way in which the audience is informed in regard to characters motivations throughout the ten episodes.

“Cobra Kai” takes place 34 years after the original film and follows a “down-and-out Johnny Lawrence, who seeks redemption by reopening the infamous Cobra Kai karate dojo, reigniting his rivalry with a now successful Daniel LaRusso, who has been struggling to maintain balance in his life without the guidance of his mentor, Mr. Miyagi. The show is about two men addressing past demons and present frustrations the only way they know how: through karate.”

Running parallel to the conflict are the story arcs of Lawrence and LaRusso’s students. For instance, there are the students of Cobra Kai: a group of picked-on underdog teenagers who find a camaraderie and self-confidence under Johnny’s tutelage, only to take their mentor’s aggressive philosophy too far as they begin to degenerate into the notorious thuggery of former Sensei Kreese’s era. In contrast, Johnny’s estranged son, Robby Keene, comes under the wing of Daniel, who proves a positive influence to the boy as he begins to seek redemption while learning the philosophies of Mr. Miyagi. Meanwhile, Daniel’s daughter, Samantha, is caught in the middle of these conflicts as she learns who her true friends are and a better path to follow.

Of course when dealing with a reimagining or a sequel of something that was created over thirty years ago the one word that screams louder than any other is nostalgia. In many cases the word nostalgia can mean to evoke feelings from the past, while in and of itself nostalgia is not negative it can be when linking it to movies and television shows. This is because many reboots and sequels are unimaginative, looking for a quick easy way to make audiences happy, taking shortcuts as well as relying on goodwill from the past. However, in the case of “Cobra Kai” what the creators have done is keep the story and action rooted in the present but with a clear foot in the past. This works extremely well as it reminds us what we loved about “The Karate Kid” but takes the characters moving them forward into the modern day, not relying per se on actions in the past as well see new rivalries from as well as some kind of understanding of past actions.

It is vital for this show to exude nostalgia, something I am not a fan of as life by its very nature is all about change, everything and everyone changes so as a society we should always be looking to the next hill, embracing newness as well as embracing the change that will be inevitable for us all. One of the key reasons that nostalgia works in “Cobra Kai” is while we are re-introduced to the characters as well as being forced to confront their old age as well as their new situations the flashbacks are reassuring in that we know these people, as well as their motivations, with their new lives in the present we accept them more readily than meeting them cold. The other reason that this new show works is that it reminds us of a time where life was a little slower as well as more recognisable, as opposed to the world we find ourselves in now with upheaval in almost every walk of life – particularly politically, can it be a coincidence that the original was made under a Reagan Republican government?. It is no surprise that the flashbacks are juxtaposed with scenes from the present, as well as diminishing as the new story takes hold, we start to enjoy not only the older characters new journey but also the new characters that in turn have their own arcs – linked to the previous narrative.

Unlike the original that revolved around the character of Danny this new show mainly takes the point of view of Johnny, his issues, his past and where he is trying to be with the life that he desperately wants, as well as the correcting of the mistakes of his life since the conclusion of “The Karate Kid”. This is one of the strengths of the new show as we see where he came from as a child as well as his non-apologetic character that seems to steam through life despite his attitude or his disdain for so much that would normally be the opposite to the perceived norm. What is interesting is the way in which Johnny’s attitude changes in small ways but enough to make him a sympathetic character, sometimes more so than Danny, which is saying something, especially after the way the original movie ended. As with Johnny we see Danny as a more complicated person than anyone could have imagined, he makes many mistakes with his relationships, more so than he would like but like Johnny he keeps moving ahead no matter what. What is interesting as well is something Johnny does not have, the way in which Danny’s wife makes comments about decisions or situations that he finds himself in, she is an anchor who actually keeps Danny’s worlds stable. Sure Johnny has his star pupil but both of them lack perspective or experience so they seem to continually move through life without any idea of consequences.

Returning to their iconic 1980s characters are stars Ralph Macchio and William Zabka as Danny and Johnny respectively who both bring very different traits to their characters. Zabka is the one that is the revelation as a multi leveled character who shines in this second go at Johnny, as the lead he knows when to play the comedy as well as the drama, he also has chemistry with everyone he shares a scene with. What is great is to see him playing comedy to the extent he does, he has some of the best lines in the show as well as all the great scenes. Macchio was of course one of the great young actors of the 1980s but in the 1990s and 2000s became more known for playing himself particularly on television. What is great is to see him not in an ironic way as Danny, not only that but as an adult with issues of his own away from Karate – he really has to make some decisions that impact not only himself but his family – Macchio knows this character so well that it is easy to forget that he is a talented actor.

I loved this show it had everything going for it in terms of drama as well as comedy. It also is not afraid to comment on the current political climate as well as improving on stereotypes that existed in the 1980s when the source material was produced. It also is not afraid to look back while maintaining its narrative firmly in the present, as well as being as original as anything else on television at the moment.

Episodes:

Ace Degenerate– Thirty four years after losing to Daniel LaRusso in the 1984 All Valley Under-18 Karate Championship, Johnny Lawrence struggles to make a living as a handyman while Daniel runs a successful car dealership chain in the San Fernando Valley.

Strike First– Miguel begins his karate training with Johnny bullying him for his asthma and low self-esteem. Johnny is informed by the health department that the dojo needs a lot of work before he can officially teach students. Meanwhile, Daniel and his wife get into an argument after discovering that Samantha has invited her friends over to their home for a pool party in their absence. While reconciling with his daughter, Daniel finds out that Samantha is romantically interested in a boy called Kyler and offers to invite him to a family dinner.

Esqueleto– Johnny tries to recruit more students to the dojo and Daniel decides to chaperone the school Halloween dance. Miguel’s karate training is stepped up as Johnny urges him to use the Cobra Kai creed of “Strike hard. Strike first. No mercy” in his everyday life and urges him to attend the Halloween dance.

Cobra Kai Never Dies– Robby learns of the new dojo and is embarrassed by his father’s recruitment methods. Meanwhile, a LaRusso Auto billboard is vandalized and evidence leads Daniel to suspect Johnny as the culprit.

Counterbalance– Miguel shows improvement in both his karate skills and his general health. Daniel tries to make a shady deal that could shut down Cobra Kai, but hurts innocent business owners in the process. Samantha’s heavy-set classmate Aisha Robinson joins Cobra Kai despite Johnny’s initial misgivings about training girls.

Quiver– Daniel tries unsuccessfully to persuade Samantha to go back to karate. The footage of Miguel’s fight at school goes viral and brings many new students to the Cobra Kai dojo but Johnny cannot suppress his old ways and bullies them, embarrassing Eli in front of the entire class

All Valley– Johnny uses painful methods to train his new students. Miguel asks Johnny for advice on girls and Johnny manages to give him a boost of confidence which leads to Miguel asking Samantha out on a successful date.

Molting– Despite Daniel’s strong objections, the All Valley Sports Karate Board decides that Cobra Kai is allowed to compete in the All Valley Karate Tournament, so Johnny ups his game with additional training and unconventional methods steals one of the motorcycles, and rides off to confront Daniel.

Different but Same– After Johnny’s car is burned by Daniel’s cousin and his thugs, Johnny confronts Daniel at his home. However, before they come to blows, Amanda quickly defuses the looming fight with an invitation to peacefully discuss the matter over breakfast and they reach an agreement: in addition to Louie being fired, Johnny would receive a trade-in car from their business in compensation.

Mercy– Cobra Kai returns to the annual All Valley Under-18 Karate tournament with a full team led by Miguel. Robby too participates as a fighter unaffiliated with any dojo.

Streaming review: “Cobra Kai Season One” (2018) “Cobra Kai Season One” (2018) Television 10 Episodes Produced by: Jon Hurwitz, Hayden Schlossberg, and Josh Heald…

#cobra kai #cobra kai review #Cobra Kai Season One #cobra kai streaming #cobra kai youtube #john spry streaming #karate kid #Ralph Macchio #reboot #spry film streaming #streaming #William Zabka #youtube #youtube series

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abckidstvyara · 7 years ago

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From Ferraris to flying taxis: Q&A with Lilium’s new Head of Product Design

Munich-based Lilium, the super ambitious company developing an electric vertical take-off and landing (VTOL) jet and accompanying “air taxi” service, continues to hire top talent to make its vision a reality. The latest new recruitment is car design veteran Frank Stephenson, who has previously worked for Ferrari, Maserati, and Mini, to name but a few.

Considered one of the world’s most renowned and influential car designers in recent times, 58-year-old Stephenson’s portfolio includes iconic designs such as the BMW X5, New MINI, Ferrari F430, Maserati MC12, and McLaren P1. Now he’s embarking on adding the Lilium jet to that list.

In a call with Stephenson yesterday morning, I got to ask him why he’s ditched Ferraris for flying taxis, what his new role will entail more specifically, and to dig a little deeper into how he thinks about design and why good design really matters. A lightly edited transcript of the full Q&A follows.

So if you have a Michelin rated-restaurant and you’ve got to feed 100 people, you’re going to have quite a few cooks in there and the waiters and everybody else to run the machine. But the chef, the guy that’s got the Michelin stars… gets all the credit for it. But it’s all the other guys doing the work for him and he’s basically overseeing it and he’s trying to keep everything moving along the right track. That’s kind of what it’s like. I mean, I’m not probably your standard type of design director because I like to get in and cook and mix up the stuff too. I just have never been able to stop getting my hands dirty. I guess in that respect, the design directors come across often as prima donnas almost and sit back and watch the guys work and every now and then say he likes it or he doesn’t like it. But I am more of a hands on type of director.

I don’t set the brief because that comes from marketing, what product segment or what market segment the product should fit. So if they’re telling us to design a two-seater vehicle or a five seater vehicle or whatever then that becomes the target of the design team to deliver in a certain time span. What I do is I meet with the marketing guys, I meet with engineering guys.

The engineering guys will lay out what we call a package, where all the critical components are for the vehicle. With a car it is typically where does the passenger and the driver sit, where are the wheels and where is the engine and how much trunk or boot space are we going to have. Things like that. And then I work around all those components with the aerodynamic engineers, suspension and everything.

The moment we come up with great ideas, we work with engineers. Typically I try to get engineers and designers working together in the same studio or very tightly together so there’s no loss of traction, and to make sure that what we’re doing can be made. We typically create scale models out of clay. We maybe do two, maybe three, different designs, and as those designs evolve one will get chosen as the favourite theme. That goes to full-scale. And then when this clay model is finally approved by engineering, and approved by finance, and approved by marketing, and approved by design, we will recommend that to the CEO and he’ll have a look at it if he hasn’t followed throughout the process, and then that product will become the model for prototyping and we’ll take moulds off of it and create the real panels for the car and then it goes into production. Pretty much that’s it in a nutshell.

As a design director I have to control everything from the look to the colour to the ergonomics to the feasibility of it. And then with Lilium the requirements will probably branch out over into what the Lilium port will look like that you access to get into your jet. So the whole kind of environment from an aesthetic or emotional point of view.

TC: Give me more of a sense of the relationship between design and engineering (or form and function)… Aren’t you somewhat constrained in your imagination by the science of flying?

No, that’s what a bad designer would tell you, ‘I’m constrained, that’s why the vehicle doesn’t look as good as it should’. But the fact is he’s getting paid the big bucks to make that thing look good and if he can’t make it look good he’s just not good enough. So there’s no excuse in my book for bad design or anything that looks bad. Absolutely no excuse. Anything can be made beautiful and should be made desirable, obviously.

So in terms of constraints, yeah, but that is what makes the game so fun for a designer, that you’re working within rules and legislation and restrictions which make it a challenge. That’s why you get good-looking cars and other cars that don’t look as good. Like I said, if there is a beautiful small car, why aren’t all small cars beautiful? It’s a taste thing obviously. Some people like some designs, a lot of people like other designs. But good design is absolutely not subjective. There’s good design and bad design, and there are a lot of bad designs out there — not to knock them or criticise — but there are principles for good design that designers typically learn when they’re being educated. If you don’t apply those laws of good design then you’re not going to have a good design.

I think designing cars is not harder or easier than designing an aircraft, it’s just making the absolutely best product you can make that works well. Typically if you design something that works very, very well it looks fantastic. If you design something that doesn’t work very well then the design doesn’t matter at the end of the day. One of the interesting things is people always say that form follows function. I’ve never heard anything more ridiculous in my life because for me form equals function. If the product works well, it looks great. There’s nothing in the world that works fantastically well and looks awful, that combination doesn’t exist. Especially in nature. You look at all these beautiful animals and organisms in nature that work incredibly well, and therein lies the beauty of nature. Horses and cheetahs and all these amazing animals, nobody sat down and designed this amazing looking animal. Evolution caused it to be absolutely fantastic at what it does, and through being fantastic at what it does, the result is the look, and that look is awesome. That same principle is how I feel about design. If you work very good with the engineers and you create optimised solutions, it’s very easy to make them look good, it’s almost inherent in that way.

TC: Regards the Lilium jet… what is the main challenge in your mind of designing what is a new type of transportation?

What I need to do is not just make it an incredible aesthetic joy to be in, but when you get inside of one of these things you don’t want to get out of it. It’s going to be the experiences that you have when you’re inside this transportation device. If you could just take that situation of being inside of a capsule, what would you want to occur there? You want to relax, you want to socialize, you want to work, you want to be entertained. All that is now incredibly possible.

I mean all the advances … where everything coming now is digital and so real that you can actually imagine something on the inside being the new wave of entertainment. So basically you’re in your private space, you get to turn it into a virtual world where you’re being transported from A to B or wherever your destination is. And within that space in time you’re in the ideal atmosphere. You’re not really sitting in a plane and just going along for the ride, which is what you do pretty much in a taxi. All the new materials that are coming about at the moment in terms of seats, flooring, lighting, buttons, displays, image projection, sounds, and temperature control. You know all the things that we try to shoot into new cars as a next step for luxury, those are just going to become everyday things that are making the whole ride an incredible experience.

Regretfully they’ll be a lot shorter in duration because of the nature of the jet being you know very high-speed and all that. But it’s kind of like if you can imagine somebody who loves roller coasters they’re always at the end thinking ‘oh my gosh that was too quick, I want to do this thing again’. That is the kind of positive feeling you should have when you get out of the vehicle.

TC: How did you get this job ? Did they come to you? Were you just like, ‘I’ve done cars, I want to do something new’?

TC: Are there any particular designers or designs that you can point to and say that designer or product has stood the test of time?

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sheepydraws · 7 years ago

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I’ll Kick Your Ass! I’ll Kick My Fiancee’s Ass! I’ll Kick My Own Ass! (8/11)

Facebook Messenger, Group Chat

Ryoga: My phone’s out of commission for a few days, so don’t try to call or text.

Shampoo: Ha! I told you that case wasn’t indestructible

Ukyo: Did you drop it into a jet engine or something?

Ryoga: Worse. Akari found a tumblr with pictures of me dueling Ranma. For Akane.

Shampoo: Oh shit!!!

Ukyo: So she bashed your phone in?

Ryoga: Akari is a very gentle, creative, pissed off person. She wouldn’t do something like that.

Scrawled in every public restroom between Ryoga’s flat and Sheffield in permanent marker:

LOOKING TO GET DICKED DOWN.

MEN ONLY, THE BIGGER (PERVERTS) THE BETTER.

PLEASE CALL/TEXT/SEND NUDES TO: [Number Redacted]

NO NAMES, JUST TELL ME WHAT YOU’D DO TO ME

Ranma’s Diary

Of course I was going to drive up with Nabiki and Akane, but now dad expects me to stay with them, too. Something about our heater not working. The problem is lack of cash flow, not a busted valve, but the Tendos have guest rooms and tons of food, so I wasn’t going to complain.

‘cept the Tendos also have world war three going on right now, and I’d almost rather go home and try my luck with the space heater than listen to another meltdown.

Akane dropped the P-Bomb on her dad on our way home. She’s been flat and distant ever since she heard, and then she just blurts it out. Interrupts Nabiki and “Car Talk” mid-sentence. Nabiki’s mouth shut so fast it clicked, and Soun turned the radio off, even though he didn’t believe Akane till he saw the video.

We spent the next hour skidding along the freeway while Soun talked, mostly to himself, asking questions like, ‘How are we going to afford this?’ and ‘She doesn’t even date, how could this have happened?’, that no one could answer.

I felt pretty fucking awkward, listening to this guy I don’t really know monologue at his only daughter who wasn’t there, but Akane got all bright and shiny. She went from looking like a zombie to having apple cheeks, and smiling at me. Holding my hand and telling me that this was a family thing that I shouldn’t worry about—even though I might marry her? So it would be my family thing too? And her hands are really soft but they have really distinct calluses so they aren’t just floppy mush, but I didn’t want to think about that so we played hangman in her totally-not-a-diary till we used words that would make urban dictionary queasy and we had to stop.

It was interesting watching the reverse with Kasumi. One second she’s stirring away at a risotto for lunch, flushed with the steam, the next minute she’s snow pale with two red spots on her cheeks cause she’s still stirring the risotto.

First Soun was mad because of the money, but Kasumi claims she has a lot of money from her videos. Then he was mad because she doesn’t want to move out. She says it’s more sensible, and the baby can stay in her room for the first few years, and after that hopefully Nabiki will have moved out. I think Nabiki would have been pissed off that Kasumi was making decisions for her, if she hadn’t looked like she was considering climbing out the kitchen window to get away.

Now Soun is mad because Kasumi won’t tell him who the father is. She won’t even say if she did it artificially or not. Kasumi isn’t budging on this. Every time Soun brings it up her lips go thin and she burns whatever she’s cooking. Not that there isn’t plenty of pound cake, fudge, fried rice, casseroles, and whatever else Kasumi thinks up. Part of it is because of the holidays, but most of it is because it keeps her busy. I’m not complaining, but it’d be nice to eat in peace.

Facebook Messenger

Ukyo: So has your girlfriend murdered you yet?

Ryoga: Akari wouldn’t do that. She’s left rotten eggs on my doorstep, tried to send me a computer virus, and apparently gave every degenerate in England my phone number, but I don’t think she’s working up to murder.

Ukyo: I tried to warn you, man. Love makes you go bananas.

Ryoga: Uh-huh…

Ukyo: What?

Ryoga: Uh, I saw you kiss Shampoo.

Ukyo: She kissed me. She felt guilty for hiding things from me. It was a one time thing.

Ryoga: Right.

Ukyo: Look, have I noticed that Shampoo is pretty? Yes. Is she really funny and not afraid to laugh till she shoots soda out of her nose? Yes. Do I feel comfortable around her and like how it feels when I wake up in the middle of the night and can hear her breathing? Of course, I’m human. Have I pictured her wearing stockings and a garter belt? Maybe, but I’ve pictured you doing the same thing, so I’m going to put that down as normal human urge as well. You’re great, and so is Shampoo, but I’m not in love with either of you.

Ukyo: Ryoga? You there?

Ryoga: Sorry, I think someone just hurled a burned sponge cake at my window. I have to deal with this.

Ryoga: It was full of jam and cream.

Ryoga: Like how you’re full of shit.

Ukyo: If I like Shampoo, explain why wasn’t I upset when I heard she had kissed you.

Nabiki Tendo’s Bank Statement.

December 18th Withdrawal.

From: Savings

To: Patreon, Kasumi Tendo [Donated as: ANONYMOUS]

Amount: 5,137.56

Comment: N/A

Kodachi’s Journal:

I DON’T WANT TO WRITE A CHRISTMAS POEM, JESUS H CHRIST.

EVEN IF TATEWAKI IS MY BROTHER HE CAN’T JUST BARGE INTO MY ROOM RANTING ABOUT PHOTOS AND FAMILIAL LOVE AND LOW RISE JEANS (seriously why is he so obsessed with those? No one has been into low rise jeans since Britney Spears had kids.) AND WHEN I TELL HIM TO FUCK OFF BACK TO HIS ROOM HE SAYS I SHOULD WRITE A NICE POEM ABOUT SNOW AND ANGELS AND GOOD FOOD, “Like Keats” HE SAYS.

WHO THE FUCK CARES ABOUT KEATS? I’VE GOT A SPRAINED ANKLE, AND LIKE, I AM SO SICK OF HAVING SPRAINED ANKLES AND WRISTS AND BROKEN TOES. I LOVE GYMNASTICS, BUT I’M KIND OF SICK OF IT? LIKE, I SHOULD BE TRAVELING TO A MATCH RIGHT NOW, INSTEAD OF KEEPING MY LEG ELEVATED, BUT I’M HONESTLY SO SICK OF THIS SHIT I DON’T EVEN CARE. I REALLY LIKE MY TEAMMATES, BUT THE ACTUAL GYMNASTICS BIT?

FUCK, I USED TO SNEAK INTO THE GYM OR PRACTICE MOVES IN MY ROOM WHEN I WAS INJURED. I LOVED THE TWINGES OF PAIN. IT WAS EXHILARATING. Now it’s just like…Pain hurts.

AND SO DOES MY BROTHER, TRYING TO TELL ME WHAT TO WRITE WHILE HE GOES TO HIS ROOM TO JERK OFF TO PHOTOS OF GIRLS WITH DOLLAR BILLS IN THE THONGS STICKING OUT OF THEIR JEANS OR WHATEVER THE FUCK HE DOES. I’LL WRITE A ODESSY OF SCORCHING HEAT AND DEMONS, FUCK YOU VERY MUCH.

Not Anal

Mousse doesn’t work for grandmother anymore. She fired him for trying to knife one of my friends. The new girl is pretty nice. Her name is Konatsu. She’s one of those people who catches on to things pretty quickly and probably is good at math or dancing or something, but is still a total idiot.

Example: I’m telling her about a soap opera she’s thinking about starting, and I say, “The sex scenes are really good, too. If that sweetens the pot for you.”

She stares at me blankly. “What?”

“They’re really passionate, you know? It doesn’t feel like they’re posing for the camera.”

“What does that mean?”

That was when I remembered that this girl is like sixteen doing part time, and maybe she honestly has no idea what I’m talking about. “A-a lot of the time it feels like they’re being directed, and it’s really obvious. Like you can kind of hear someone saying, ‘okay, now moan, and make sure to turn your head so you’re facing the camera’, you know?”

“What does ‘sweeten the pot’ mean. Is that a euphemism?”

See? Lights are on, but nobody’s home.

She’s still better than Mousse.

I’ve been thinking about him a lot, though. Now that he’s ignoring me I can think about him without getting a ‘speak of the devil’ feeling creeping up my back. I can even run through the good memories without worrying I’ll want to get back together with him.

Studying at his house, coming with him when he dog sat for his neighbor and then getting into their pool, challenging each other to speed eating contests with jello packs in the cafeteria. Mousse could be a lot of fun when we were bored and actively trying to come up with ways to get into trouble.

I like that I can think about the sex again, too. Mousse was never as pushy about sex as he was about us getting back together. He was kind of surprised the first time I said, in the same tone I said things like, ‘How many of these milk cartons do you think we could drink before someone yells at us?’, or, ‘no, that’s probably illegal’,

“Do you think we could get away with having sex?”

We planned it out like a jewel heist. He would have to come to my house since his bike was kept on his front porch and mine was always in our foyer. I’d make sure the kitchen window was unlocked so that grandma and mom wouldn’t wake up at the sound of the door opening. Then he’d have to creep up the stairs, skipping almost every other step to avoid creaking.

Honestly, I think I spent more time being excited about the smuggling a boy into my room thing than the actual losing my virginity bit. But that part was pretty nice.

If Mousse had wanted to move away from here, or just been okay when I said I wanted to, we might still be together. Or would it have been even messier because I would have fallen for Ukyo and Ryoga anyway? I keep thinking of dating Mousse as ‘simpler times’ but who am I kidding?

Forwarded To: Ranma Saotome From: Nancy Sulivan Junior

Private Materials

Certification of Report of Birth (of a United States Citizen)

Ayame Saotome

[Information Ranma already knew]

Father: Genma Saotome Mother: Nodoka Saotome (Née Kumon)

Nodoka Saotome’s Facebook Profile:

In her icon Nodoka is a handsome woman in her early forties with doe eyes that make her look younger than she is. They are Ranma’s eyes. His hair too, he thinks. Not that he can tell when his father has been bald for as long as he can remember.

Her banner photo is Japanese calligraphy, saying something about honor and passion. Her description says she works at a dojo, and her public albums show her working with children in oversized gi’s and heavy belts.

She looks happy.

Of course she does, it’s fucking facebook. No one posts sad shit on facebook. No one writes about leaving their husband and losing their child. They don’t write about how much they miss that kid every single day and pray that somehow they’ll find them again over those obnoxious tri-fade backgrounds.

Ranma would never admit that he was hoping for it.

From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

Laura, things are such a mess. I’m glad you suggested I write it out. I couldn’t explain it over the phone, when all I wanted was to hear you joke about how your day went. (Sidenote: You should put that egg story in one of your videos. It was hilarious).

I wish I had been able to warn my family about this. Springing it on them three months in hasn’t been easy for them. I thought if I waited until I knew I was pregnant they would all be too excited to worry too much or try to talk me out of it. I thought pregnancy had this magical effect on people, where they suddenly became too happy to worry, but my family has far too much to be worried about.

Nabiki sent me her entire savings account. Every cent. She tried to do it anonymously through patreon, but I knew it was her. She was bragging about how much she had saved up last month, and I don’t believe some generous person just happened to drop that exact amount into my paypal. I sent it back to her, and I tried to explain that I have plenty, but she said, “Kasumi, there is a reason I have been on birth control since I was fourteen—Kids are the worst investment on the planet. They eat money, and you can’t expect any returns.”

I reminded her that she got on birth control because she spent months telling dad about how painful and irregular her cycle was until he just wanted her to shut up about her uterus. She said that was also part of it. I know she sounds heartless (she does try so hard to give off that impression) but she was trying to be kind, and realistic.

Akane is mostly confused. She keeps asking all these question about how it feels, and what I’m allowed to do or not. I’m not sure if she’s excited or concerned, or just curious. She was the one who told dad about it, and I’ll be honest, it was a bit of a relief to have it out. If only dad hadn’t absolutely lost it. He’s angry, and I’m angry at him for being angry, but I understand why he’s so upset.

“You know, adoption is still an option.”

“So, when did you actually know? Is it kicking?”

“I don’t understand Kasumi. How did this happen? You’re a smart girl.”

No one wants to talk about the baby, though.

Wait, no. I was making macaroons yesterday, and Ranma came in from his morning run and said, “I always liked flower names for girls.”

I had no idea what he was taking about for a minute, but it did get me to look up from my macaroon piping. “What?”

“Like Violet and Rose and Daisy. I always thought they were cute. For guys you’ve got to have something solid. Something you can build a house on, you know? Like Jordan.” He nodded once, as though it was decided, and popped a cookie into his mouth before his father burst into the kitchen. He and Ranma started talking about run times while I clutched my piping bag and tried not to cry. They say pregnancy is emotional, but I think they’re only referring to the one whose pregnant.

Anyway, thank you for listening, Laura. Hugs and kisses<3

From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

Hey, hun, I finally had time to sit down and read your e-mail, and I’m sorry I can’t get down the coast again to be with you. I know I wouldn’t be much help, but you sound like what you need right now is a good hard squeeze and a friendly face.

Tho, I’ve got to say, maybe it would help if you told them how you did it? Maybe they wouldn’t be as neurotic if they weren’t imaging some clueless dude out there paying for his coffee at starbucks, with no idea he’s going to be a father.

You took charge of your live, hun, and that’s nothing to be ashamed of.

Otherwise, I think what they need is time. Right now they’re probably all thinking that this is still reversible, you know? They’re in shock.

Hey, what if you took the train up to me? See NYC under the christmas lights? I’m kind of busy, but the city is full of stuff to do. You could relax a little, eat some takeout, maybe do your christmas shopping? We could do another collab! Maybe a QandA to post between Christmas and New Years?

Maybe the best thing for you all is a little space.

Ranma’s Diary:

I got up at two in the morning and went to piss. It wouldn’t be worth writing down if I hadn’t seen the kitchen light on and found Kasumi in there. She was pouring herself a glass of milk.

“Are you doing that pregnant lady thing where you drink three glasses of milk every day?” I asked.

She laughed in this super high pitched, chirpy way that creeped me the fuck out. “No, I just woke up craving it.” She rubbed her stomach. Or, her uterus, I guess. “I’m already having trouble getting comfortable lying down.”

“That sucks.” I said. “Do you think it would feel better if you got into your pajamas?”

Kasumi did that ‘five nights at snow white’s’ laugh again. “I totally forgot. It gets so cold in my room sometimes I don’t want to take my clothes off long enough to get changed.”

“Okay.” I said, because I didn’t really care, but at the same time I was getting really freaked out. I looked past Kasumi for a second, at the dining room, and I saw a rolling suitcase lying under the dining room table.

I could have asked, I should have, but Kasumi’s an adult, right? Also, she might have done that laugh thing again, and every time she did I felt like a demon was creeping up on me.

So I said good night and went back to bed

Now all anyone can talk about is the fact that Kasumi has disappeared, and I want to say something, but then I might have to talk about what happened next.

I went back upstairs

Forget it. I’m sure Kasumi’s safe, and everyone is all freaking out over nothing. So she wants to be alone for a while. Can you blame her?

Akane’s Diary

I feel like this is my fault somehow. I heard something weird the night she left, I know I did, but I ignored it.

And why did I ignore it?

I woke up in the middle of the night to Ranma on the stairs right outside my door. He was just standing there, one foot on the stairs, the other on the landing.

“Ranma?” I whispered.

He jumped. “Akane?”

“What are you doing?”

He came to stand in my doorway, a black silhouette against the yellow of the hall light. “I couldn’t remember where my gi was. I left it on the couch.”

I squinted at him, trying to see his expression. “Were you up?”

“No, I woke up.” He waved his hand and added, “It’s not important.”

His voice was kind of thick and raspy from sleep. It was nice. It reminded me of…

I’m such a fucking idiot.

Of course it was Ranma on Halloween. Guess what everyone, I’ve figured out the meaning of life! It is TO MAKE FUN OF ME.

I should have told him to go to bed and then tried to go back to sleep and forget about it. Sure, he was about the right height, and his voice sounded similar, and when I couldn’t see his face it seemed really obvious, but that didn’t mean he was Batman. Anyone can be short and do a decent batman impression.

“Could you come here?” I asked.

He hesitated, but then he came and sat on the edge of my bed.

“Closer.”

He slid down the side of the bed till our faces were just a couple of inches apart. From that close I could see him properly, so I closed my eyes and tried to pretend the air was crisp, and my armor was digging into my shoulders, and everything smelled like alcohol and cheap plastic.

“What is it?” Ranma whispered.

“What were you for Halloween this year?”

Utter silence.

I guess it was better than a lie.

“Wow.” I said, really stretching out the word, “Wuh-ow.” I started laughing at the way my own voice sounded. “Of course. I can’t fucking believe it.”

“Look, Akane, I didn’t even know it was you until-“ I knew what he was going to say. It all clicked inside my head. That was why he ran. Because why deal with things in a civilized way when you could just let fight or flight take over. “If you know what’s good for you, you won’t finish that sentence.”

“I swear I wasn’t trying to-“

I heaved my pillow at him. “Get out!” I whisper yelled, because I didn’t want anyone finding him in my room. I went to shove him off my bed, but he dodged and stood up himself.

Something about not being able to make contact, not being able to feel a satisfying weight against my palms, made me even madder. I chased him out of my room saying, “You asshole, you fucking asshole!”

He tried to reason with me again at my door.

“This is why I didn’t say anything about it! I knew you would react like this.” His expression softened a little. “Maybe it’s a good thing? We had fun, right? If we get married-“

“We aren’t getting married.” I said, and to my horror my voice broke at the end of the sentence and I started crying. I’ve never cried like that before, sudden streaming tears. “I don’t care what our dads say, I make my own decisions. I am never going to marry you, Ranma.”

And then Ranma said the exact thing I didn’t want him to say.

“But if you’re trying to do the opposite of what they want, are you really making your own decision?”

I closed the door on him. I waited until I heard his footsteps on the stairs again, and then I slid to my knees, forehead pressed to the wood, and kept crying. I haven’t been this confused since I was eight years old and I started doing things wrong. When I started feeling strange in my own skin. It wasn’t me though, it wasn’t my fault. It was everyone else who was suddenly obsessed with boys and girls and their difference, and which side I was on.

At least then on some level the answer was easy. I mean, I know who I am. It was everyone else I had to convince.

All this stuff with Ranma makes me feel like no matter which way I go I’m always rubbed the wrong way. Like something slices into me, but it’s corkscrew shaped so no matter which way I turn it cuts me so half of my skin peels away. I want to be my own person, I want to decide who I marry, but now I feel like I want Ranma to be an option as well.

I was thinking about shit like this and trying to find a good metaphor when I heard something that I swear was the kitchen window opening and closing. I swear, there was the little squeal it has, and a thud as it shut again. I’m sure that was what it was.

But I was too busy thinking about myself and my unmasked man.

I’m such an idiot.

From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

Akari, since you’ve blocked me on everything and refuse to talk to me in real life, I thought I might at least try to explain myself here.

I never cheated on you. I did duel a guy for a date with a girl, but it wasn’t just because I wanted to date the girl. It’s complicated, but the guy is a jerk and the girl thought the best way to get him to leave her alone would be if someone bested him in combat.

I didn’t even win.

I understand if you don’t want to be together anymore, but I want you to know that I never went out with Akane, or kissed her, or anything like that. I want you to know that I still have my honor.

All my love,

Ryoga.

P.S: At least stop indirectly attacking me? I have now seen enough dick pics and rotten eggs to last a life time.

Latest post from fuckboisgetmoney.tumblr.com

Big sis done got knocked up and run away, little sis’s engagement dangles by a thread, and the middle child is involved in a blackmail mexican stand off.

We’re a god damn soap opera.

#at least i like soap operas #no one’s getting laid tho

Kasumi Tendo’s instagram(@riceandsalt): A photo of one of the infamous Black Tap milkshakes, a cake batter milkshake with a frosting and sprinkle covered rim, garnished with a hefty slice of funfetti cake, whipped cream, and a cherry.

A photo of Laura wearing a blanket cape, posed dramatically in front of a window overlooking a snowy city.

A photo of Kasumi’s nails, freshly painted pink and white, with cutsey teddy bears on the thumb. The work is professional, and quite good at that.

A photo of Kasumi, standing sideways in front of a mirror, her sweater tucked into her bra so you can see the beginning of a baby bump. The skin on her stomach is pink in a line across the top where her lap top was just resting. Description: After #iluvuLaura and I posted the AMA I got a lot of questions asking for #babybump photos, so here’s a quick one❤️.

ILuvULaura’s Latest Video: Christmas QandA with Kasumi Tendo! [Published December 23rd]

The girls are sitting on the chairs in Luara’s kitchen, snow falling in the windows behind them. You can see the photos hanging from Laura’s fridge, her family back in Newport, her last dog, her graduation photo. On the bar just behind the two of them are mugs with tea for Laura and hot chocolate for Kasumi. They look relaxed, Kasumi leaning back in her chair, one hand resting on her stomach.

Laura: So, I know this says it’s a Christmas Q and A, but since Kasumi’s involved there were a lot of pregnancy questions.

Kasumi: And isn’t that was Christmas is all about? [laughter]

Laura: I’m just saying. Actually I want to get a couple of the most common pregnancy questions out of the way first.

Kasumi: Right, right. I think the three biggest ones were, ‘when are you due?’, ‘what will the name be?’ and… [She glances at Laura, a little uncomfortable with the next part]

Laura: Yeah, there were a TON of people asking about the father.

Kasumi. Yeah. Anyway, I’m due sometime in May, although I don’t put much stock in that. All three of us, my sisters and I, we were born wildly off the mark for the due date.

Laura: Really?

Kasumi: I was born almost a month early—well, earlier than the due date, I wasn’t actually premature. Nabiki was two weeks late, and the doctor who did Akane’s first ultrasound got everything fucked up and she was really small, so she was born two months before anyone expected her.

Laura: [Laughs] That’s so weird. I was right on time. Like, the exact day.

Kasumi: Your mom probably went to a better doctor than mine.

[They laugh and swap childhood anecdotes. It’s an all around good time for everyone but the Tendo family watching at home.]

Ranma’s Diary

I like being legal, but around Christmas I always miss being a kid. Being excited and selfish and doing all the cheesy traditions with a huge grin, and dreaming about the toys I would get—Christmas is the best when you’re a kid. I always got cool stuff, too. I could always count on my dad.

This year I couldn’t think of any shit I wanted. I asked dad for one of those fancy pedometers that tracks your heart rate and stuff, and some sweaters. The only thing I was excited about was whatever Kasumi was going to make for dinner, but she’s in New York.

Oh, yeah, turns out she was staying with a friend. Soun lost his shit. He straight up had her reported missing when she’d been gone twenty-four hours, and now that he knows where she is he’s on a train up there to drag her back.

It’s going to be nuts, but right now we’re waiting around and eating all the food Kasumi left. Dad’s at the gym. I think he’s pissed about something, but who cares. It gave me like five hours to stare at mom’s facebook page.

I don’t know what I’m going to do, man. I gotta fix things with Akane, and my mom, and Kasumi, and maybe all the Tendos, but I don’t even know where to start.

Okay, wait, I know what I want for Christmas. I want Soun and Kasumi to get back at like three am tonight and scream at each other in the living room, but then cry and make up. That’s what Ukyo and I did and

Last five posts from okinomiyakimeansiloveyou.tumblr.com:

5. Mean Girls gif set

4. I’m telling you, this whole ‘no romantic relationships thing is pretty sweet. Like, you know what dating leads to? ENGAGEMENT. Fuck. I know a guy who’s engaged, but not exactly. It’s a whole thing. Anyway, he calls me up on Christmas eve eve and says, “How do you apologize for kissing someone?” cause he masked man-ed HIS OWN FIANCE.

So, after I finished laughing, I said, “Dude, you’ve got two options. You can try to tell her she’s just THAT charismatic and you couldn’t help yourself,”

“She’ll fucking kill me,”

“Or you can just apologize. There’s nothing else for it. She wanted to kiss you right?”

“I guess. When she thought I wasn’t me.”

“Well, it’s fucked up, but honestly it’s so fucked up all you can say is sorry. You can’t talk your way out of this. Just apologize and let her go from there.”

LIKE I HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT.

I mean, between this and my boy Ryoga having to deal with a semester of pent up anger from his ex, and my girl Shampoo crushing on him (or maybe just giving us all the runaround) I don’t care what people say. Not being in a relationship rocks. You don’t have to deal with any of this shit, and people still come to you for advice.

What? Yeah I’ve had three eggnogs. I’m drunk and sugar high and single and it is a good day to be alive.

3. A gif of Purity Ring lyrics overlayed on a background of patterns shifting color hypnotically.

2. Fucing rum man. Fucking A shit

1. But, like, what, if RyeRye and Shammy do gety together? Are they gonna fuck me out? I like those fuckers so much I don’t wanna be just some friend that intorduced them. Also, it’s totally not even right now. I have to kiss Rye Rye. Then it’s even,,,,right? Yeah. I wanna see how he compares. Like sHAMMY’S GOT THAT GOOD SHTI WHERE SHE LEANS IN AND HER BREASTS GET PRESSED UP AGAINST YOURS AND SHE SMEELLS LIKE A MEDAOW BUT RYRRYE’S GOT THAT SQUARE JAW whoops that was capslock, and he smells like fresh deoderant and liene annd I mean I just gotta check for sciense. Yes. Science. Goooood.

Facebook Messenger

Shampoo: MARRY CHRISTMAS! 🎊

Shampoo: Btw, did you get a weird drunk dial from Ukyo at like two am this morning?

Ryoga: It was seven over here.

Shampoo: So you were on the other line! I thought I could hear you, but Ukyo kept talking over you.

Ryoga: Did you understand anything they were saying?

Shampoo: Not really. Something about love. I think it was the love doesn’t exist spiel.

Ryoga: I thought that might be it. It sounded sort of like she was telling us not to get together????

Shampoo: That’s so weird. Why would he think of that?

Ryoga: I don’t know.

Ryoga: We did kiss.

Shampoo: But you had a girlfriend then. And then I kissed Ukyo, so it’s all even.

Ryoga: Actually, I haven’t kissed Ukyo.

Shampoo: Do you want to?

Ryoga: Maybe then she would feel better? We’d all be on a level playing field.

Shampoo: I feel like this is sliding into threeway territory.

Ryoga: yeah

From: [email protected]

To: KasumiTendo96@gmail

Kasumi, are you alright? You seemed okay when you left but I just wanted to make sure you were ok. Your dad was really pissed.

Merry Chirstmas, by the way. I hope you’re happy and with loved ones.

From: Kasumitendo96@gmail

To: iluvulaura@hotmail

Oh lord. Laura, are you sitting down?

First of all, I’m fine. Yes, dad was pissed, but he had the right. If my kid did something like this I’d be worried sick too.

We cried a lot on the train ride home. People were looking at us weird and avoiding us as they walked down the aisle. We were both crying so hard, and the train was barely heated so our noses were just pouring snot. Basically everyone is scared and worried and we’re all really confused right now.

Honestly? I thought this was going to be easier. At least the pregnancy bit! But I think it would be like this even if I was married and everything was a little more conventional. There would still be crazy questions and fears, and late night crying jags. Only things might have gotten off on a slightly better foot.

But it’s good to be home. I think everyone has at least accepted what is happening. I’m making a belated Christmas dinner with all the favorites, which won’t be ready till tomorrow, but just the thought has perked everyone up. Akane is trying to help, and is telling me about all the crazy pregnancy stuff she’s learned on the internet. I’m telling her what’s totally fake and what is mostly fake.

Nabiki is talking about preschools, and how the really good ones require you to get on a waiting list NOW, and it turns out that while everyone else was panicking over where I was, she was buying a crib and setting it up in my room.

Dad’s been telling stories about when we were all babies. Some of them are funny, and some are mildly terrifying, especially the ones involving the dojo. Dad noticed that I looked really worried and he said, “You really can drop a kid on their head a few times, and they’ll still turn out just fine. Don’t worry if you fuck up a little.” which didn’t exactly make me feel better,

but I didn’t feel worse either, so…

Oh, and Ranma.

Hoo-boy. This is the part I thought you might want to sit down for.

When I got home Ranma was waiting for me in my room. He was sitting on my bed with his laptop, but he was cross legged with his eyes closed like he’d been meditating or something. He scared me out of my skin.

“Kasumi,” He said, like he hadn’t just ambushed me in my own room. “I have to ask you something.”

I closed my bedroom door and put my bag down. “What is it?”

“What would you think if your kid was trans? And your sister wasn’t.” He added.

I sat down on my bed. “I don’t know if I can really answer that. I remember how I felt when Akane came out.” It was sometime before her senior year. It was ridiculously hot in the kitchen. I was making lemon bars for something I don’t even remember-lemon bars, the easiest things in the world!-and I was sweating bullets, and Akane walked up behind me and started lecturing me on the history of the trans movement in America and the fluidity of gender. I half thought she had a school project on it until she got to the point. “I was surprised mostly. It was in the news a bit more then, but you know how it is. You think of it as something that happens to other people’s brothers.”

Ranma nodded, but he had this flat look on his face that said I hadn’t really answered his question. “Right, but would you have felt different if it had been your kid?”

I tried to think about it, I really did, but I just can’t say. “I might be a little more worried about them. I mean, Akane was almost eighteen. I knew it was her decision to make. I think if my child said that their gender was different than expected I might be more concerned about how that would effect them, but I want them to be happy. If that’s a part of their happiness I would have to support them.”

Ranma seemed a little more satisfied after that, but then he said, “Now pretend you’re like twenty years older and come from a more traditional family. What would you think of it then?”

At that point I threw my hands up and told him I couldn’t answer for anyone else. That was when he’d told me he’d tracked down his mother (I mean, it wasn’t hard. She lives a few hours from Ranma’s school in the opposite direction from our town and she has a facebook account) and he wanted to talk to her. Only he can’t because she thinks she has and daughter out there somewhere and, well…

Oh, Laura I can’t talk about it too much, but he got all choked up and then wouldn’t cry, which was worse. Listening to him trying to explain it all when his throat was closed off and he was shaking…I held him for a while but I don’t know what to do. If my kid is trans or gay or queer it won’t matter as much because there’s Akane. But for Ranma…He doesn’t really know his mother’s family, so he has no idea how they would react.

Although…Ah, I don’t want to write this, it’s so indulgent, but it made my heart so warm.

I had to stop hugging Ranma because it was a little awkward, us both sitting and his legs pulled up like they were, and then he said, “You’re going to make a good mother.”

I said, “All I did was listen and give you a hug. I don’t think that’s all there is to mothering.”

“That’s all I want my mother to do when I see her.”

I worry about Ranma, but then again I don’t. I think even if his mother jilts him, he’s strong enough to handle it. And he knows he has somewhere to go if he isn’t.

Kodachi’s Journal

Freezing temperatures

Snow long since tracked away

The buzzing of new years clackers fades.

Boredom hangs low and grey as the sun

You can’t look at your brother without fighting.

Oh Ranma.

Either you have taken me for a ride

Or you owe me one.

From: TKuno

To: NabikiTendo

Seeing as we seem to have reached MAD, may I inquire as to the health of your pregnant friend?

From: NabikiTendo

To: TKuno

You are lucky I’m bored, and shocked, and get to rub your face in the fact that the courtesan and the accountant were banging.

Yeah, she’s all better after a relaxing trip to New York.

From: TKuno

To: NabikiTendo

New York? Wouldn’t being in a city that big be somewhat dangerous to someone in her condition?

Also, it’s a soap opera. I’m sure there will be another reversal of fortune eventually.

From: TKuno

To:NabikiTendo

She’s pregnant, not a blown glass ornament. Women have been having babies since forever. We’re pretty good at it.

Also, you are such a reacher. Did you see the sex scene between C and A? Now that was chemistry.

From: TKuno

To: NabikiTendo

Women have also being dying from complications since forever. I only wish you understand that I am sincere in my desire to for your friend to be healthy. I think that baring children is one of the noblest acts of mankind.

Also, I will not debate the merits of various sex scenes with you.

From: NabikiTendo

To: TKuno

You got anything better to do?

Facebook Messenger

Shampoo: We should stop talking about this.

Ryoga: If you want to.

Shampoo: I don’t know. It feels inappropriate.

Ryoga: It’s not like we work together or anything.

Shampoo: I know.

Shampoo: But why does Ukyo have to be involved?

Ryoga: They don’t. This doesn’t have to be anything. We’re just talking.

Shampoo: Talking leads to doing and doing leads to pregnancy.

Ryoga: I think I know how to put a condom on.

Shampoo: You’ve had sex before?

Ryoga: No. Not sex-sex. But the condom bit is easy.

Shampoo: You and Akari never fucked??? And she’s still this mad?

Ryoga: She’s a bit less mad now. We’re not talking, but she’s stopped actively trying to fuck me up.

Ryoga: Also, does having sex make a difference?

Shampoo: I think so. Stuff changes. After Mousse and I did it we got closer. And we thought we were really slick too, never talking about it in public, just doing long lingering glances. And touching more. We were more comfortable with that.

Ryoga: Why would that make it worse when you broke up?

Shampoo: We did The Thing. I think we both sort of felt like that really meant something. Like maybe we’d last.

Ryoga: But that’s what high schoolers think. We’re in college now.

Shampoo: So why didn’t you and Akari do it?

Ryoga: We were always going to do it. We were always planning on it. We were always going to get there…

Shampoo: Buuuuuut?

Ryoga: It felt like something we couldn’t take back.

Shampoo: Yeah, like after that you have to be together forever.

Shampoo: This is why we should stop talking about this. And never mention it in front of Ukyo. Ukyo doesn’t believe in forever, and I don’t want to feel like we’re using her.

Ryoga: But I don’t want to use her. I want…

Shampoo: yeah

Akane’s Diary

POSSIBLE WAYS I COULD GET OUT OF SPENDING TWO HOURS IN A CAR WITH RANMA:

1. Fake illness too severe for me to make the drive. (That would be pretty hard to fake without getting sent to the doctor. It would mean dad would have to make the drive twice, which he would be kind of hard on him. If anyone found out I was faking I might have to explain. Kasumi would take care of me and I wouldn’t be able to enjoy it.

2. Injure Ranma so that he is at the hospital when we leave. (If I suddenly broke Ranma’s leg I would probably wind up in therapy. Also, the bag of dicks probably deserves an education. Or something)

3. Call a cab and leave early in the morning. (Do you know how much a two-hour cab ride would cost?! Dad would murder me, but not before making me explain why I did it)

4. Steal our car early in the morning. (See above.)

Maybe I’ll just stay up really late the night before and sleep in the car. Being unconscious is kind of like not being there, right?

#ranma 1/2 #fanfiction #personal #text

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tanmath3-blog · 7 years ago

Text

Konstantine Paradias is a writer by choice. At the moment, he’s published over 100 stories in English, Japanese, Romanian,German, Dutch and Portuguese and has worked in a freelancing capacity for video games, screenplays and anthologies.

People tell him he’s got a writing problem but he can, like, quit whenever he wants, man. His work has been nominated for a Pushcart Prize.

1. How old were you when you first wrote your first story?

While I can’t be 100% certain, i think I wrote my first story (by way of crayons on notepaper and sticker-rebuses) when I was about 5. It was a collaborative effort with my brother, who was 3, while we were rebooting one of our earlier imaginary playmates, DUCKIE. He wasn’t too bad, but he just lacked the oomph we needed to push him into a franchise.

So we ended up with KITTENCHILDE (first name Mordecai), the richest kitten in the world. He was born with a silver cat toy dangling in front of his face, hated work, controlled the world’s economy and was plagued with moocher relatives.

I didn’t really start working on writing another story until I was 14 and my English teacher at the time told me I was hopeless with the language, so I started writing a pretty atrocious, 200k word fanfic starring every character from every game I’d played so far. I’ve since expunged it from the internet since it was absolute cringe but hey, it got the ball rolling.

2. How many books have you written?

Counting all the stuff that didn’t make it off the ground? I’d say around 6, at last count. The first one was a fantasy western story about an android assassin in a steam punk world. It was called STONE COLD COUNTENANCE and it had voodoo and ancient sorcery and demon dogs but it was so poorly written that I had to make it go away.

The second one was a novel that’s currently stuck in rewrite hell, which began as a post apocalyptic body horror novel. I started working on it in 2010 and have since taken off 50k words, added another 30k, re-worked the setting and now it’s slowly turning into the story of a motorized Mongol Horde coming back in the wake of a fossil fuel apocalypse. I call it the CHROME HORDE and I hate it and love it in the same breath.

The third once is a YA novella that’s still stuck between publishers, titled TEENAGE BADASS. It’s the story of Finn, a monster hunter born, who chooses to leaves the magical comfort of her weird family to venture out into the strange world we call our own. Also, it feature time travelling Nazi werewolves.

My fourth book is SORRY, WRONG COUNTRY, which I am immensely proud of, on account of how I was working on it for 8 years and made it happen. It’s a collection of short stories about everyday weirdness in the heart of post-recession Greece.

My fifth book is a pet project I’ve always wanted to get down to, a novella that’s the first in a series I’ve always wanted to get on with. It’s titled VIOLENCE DAVE and it’s all power metal and space marine rage and all that good old ultra-violence.

And finally, the last one is FUTURESUCK, which is coming out by Sybaritic Press and people tell me it’s depressing but I don’t see how: it’s just the story of the worst time traveler ever, whizzing across the time stream after having erased his own timeline while trying to get rich quick and messing it up royally. He can never get back but neither can we and there’s nothing we can do about it.

3. Anything you won’t write about?

Politics. Can’t stand the stuff. It’s toxic and it clings to your skin and if you aren’t careful, people around you are gonna catch it. There’s nothing more stilted and awkward than stopping a story cold in its tracks just to advertise your leanings or tell people why they’re wrong and I wont’ be changing my mind about it anytime soon.

4. Tell me about you. Age (if you don’t mind answering), married, kids, do you have another job etc…

At the risk of dating this interview, I’m 32 at the time and happily married with the only woman I could ever call ‘wife’. No kids yet, but they’re gonna happen. I’m thinking about 6, so I can train them as trapeze artists on the off-chance this writing thing doesn’t work out.

I’ve worked as a sandwich shop worker, owned a small business selling religious icons, worked in marketing, bookstore sales and even spent a spell living full-time off manuscript editing. But if I had to pick a career for myself, I’d cook for a living. People tell me it’s a crap job, but there’s nothing like the sizzle of cooking oil over a fire to get me going in the morning.

Also, waking up at 4am. People can’t stand it, but there’s no sight better than that pre-dawn light, peeking through the cloud cover on a Monday morning.

5. What’s your favorite book you have written?

So far, it’s gotta be SORRY, WRONG COUNTRY. Mostly because I worked on it for 8 years and I rewrote it a thousand times and I was never good enough for it, but I loved working on it and I think it liked the attention.

It’s a collection of stories from regular weirdos, customers and passers-by I got to meet while the country was coming apart around me and I think they kept me from losing it, especially when things turned for the worse. Hell, even if we slip off the edge of the First World, I’ll still have those guys to keep me sane.

6. Who or what inspired you to write?

Like I said, i started because I wanted to piss off my English teacher, but the person that got me into writing was the Sandwich Captain, a man I kept running into at 2am in the morning when I was working in that aforementioned sandwich shop. He was probably the most interesting man in the world and he hated the attention and he was more troubled than Sisyphus.

And I loved him for it.

7. What do you like to do for fun?

Don’t laugh, but I make pickles. Carrots, cucumbers, cabbage and garlic, chili and bell peppers and onions, oh my. Then I check on them in the middle of the night, as if they were children and worry for about two months before I crack them open.

Also, I like to grow stuff. Nothing too major: maybe some peppers, some onions, when I can. Someday, I might just head off to the boonies, live off the land, then come back just in time to regret it.

8. Any traditions you do when you finish a book?

Panic. Worry. Tell people. Feel like garbage. Start planning out the next one. Am I doing it right? I don’t think I am doing it right, at all.

9. Where do you write? Quite or music?

Mostly, I write anywhere. I write at work, between handling customers. I write at home, while trying to wrangle dinner. I never had too much time to write since I started doing it earnest, but I can’t stand music, so I guess I need the..noise?

The hum of humanity, the gentle rumble of the kitchen or traffic.

God, if the world ended I don’t think I’d ever write another word.

10. Anything you would change about your writing?

I don’t even know where to begin: personally, I hate my dialogue, think I need tons of work on establishing hooks, am garbage at pacing and overall wouldn’t publish me if it was up to me. Also, I think my research is atrocious and I have a very heavy hand when it comes to editing myself, to the point where I start second guessing to an atrocious degree.

You know what? It’s best I don’t touch anything. I already hate the entire thing.

11. What is your dream? Famous writer?

Famous? With the attention and the interviews and the podcasts and all that jazz? No, just give me enough to live on and a tank of gas-filled from book sales and a settled power bill and I’ll be happy.

But then maybe I’ll just bellyache and wish I had a movie deal by then.

12. Where do you live?

Athens, heart of Greece, birthplace of philosophers and every terrible idea alike, in a little place overlooking the Acropolis, nestled against the hill of Filopappou. On summer nights, we’re lulled to sleep by the distant baying of strays. In winter, beggars form impromptu choruses in street corners.

We swelter in August and we freeze in December and it hasn’t snowed in Christmas since forever, but I wouldn’t change it for the world.

13. What’s your favorite thing about writing?

Writing itself, I guess. Also, browsing markets, struggling to reach publishers, trying to finagle a story every chance I get.

It might come off as cynical, but I hate writing for myself. I am the worst audience I’ve ever had: I’m awfully judgmental, offer little to no feedback and am an all-around insufferable smartass.

But writing for others? Man oh man, that’s a blast. I love talking to editors or readers, especially, pitching ideas on the sly and searching for that little nod, that semi-indifferent “go for it” sign and know that I wanna give them something they will enjoy.

Hell, even if I bungle it up I’ll get some form of feedback.

You can connect with Konstantine Paradias here:

Sorry, Wrong Country Book link: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/194633507X/ref=cm_cr_dpvoterdr?ie=UTF8&thanksvoting=cr-vote-R103RDQVJM0OMW#R103RDQVJM0OMW.2115.Helpful.Reviews

Shapescapes Editing Services: http://shapescapes.blogspot.in/p/blog-page_34.html

https://www.amazon.com/Konstantine-Paradias/e/B00HT3BJ2Y/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1501580795&sr=8-1

Some of Konstantine Paradias’s books:

Getting personal with Konstantine Paradias Konstantine Paradias is a writer by choice. At the moment, he's published over 100 stories in English, Japanese, Romanian,German, Dutch and Portuguese and has…

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abckidstvyara · 7 years ago

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