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eccentric-nucleus · 2 years

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and now it's time to talk about COMBINATORICS

if you've followed me beyond tumblr you might be aware that there's this one chunk of code i've been struggling with for, uh, years now (prior posts: 1 2, uh probably several more that i can't find. that code is very outdated at this point.)

the latest draft of the code is over here, but it's very explicitly not finished & it only touches a little on the big tangle i mention at the bottom of this enormous post. prior versions also included a parser that could turn some data declaration files into an optimized 'possibility space'; that's not included or mentioned here.

i was originally gonna leave this uncut so everybody could get the full experience of me posting again but this ended up so long (well, ~3k words) i feel like i gotta cut it just to not be incredibly obnoxious. i only want to be somewhat obnoxious.

okay, so, combinatorics. if you take the four suits of cards (wands, cups, coins, swords) and the 13 rankings (ace, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, jack, queen, king) you have a total of 4 * 13 = 52 cards. this is a product operation, because you're combining a 'row' with a 'column' to get a cartesian product of all combinations of the two. if you include your 22 trump cards, you have 74 cards total, since 52 + 22 = 74. this is a sum operation, because you're just adding two things together; it's not meaningful to ask what suit or rank a trump is, or conversely what trump ranking a suited card is.

so far storing a whole deck is easy, since that's still not that many cards. but what if you had a lot more cards?

so, computers. not actually turing machines, because they have a limited storage capacity. this doesn't come up much except as a constraint, but it turns out if you do something like "try to store an enormous combinatorial set by actually allocting space for each element" you will very rapidly run into the practical limits of computing hardware very rapidly. all the code i wrote is in in haskell, so let's use that. the Char type stores a single unicode code point, from 0 to 0x110000 or so, roughly a million characters or so. (i have no clue how this actually maps to unicode code planes or w/e; this is just how ghc does it). its Int type goes from -9223372036854775808 to 9223372036854775807, so i think around 8 bytes of storage?

so if you wanted, for some reason, to store a cartesian product of one character and one number, that would result in 20,551,738,933,448,695,970,004,992 values, each taking 4+8 bytes each, for a total of 204 yottabytes of storage required. it's pretty obvious that that's both way too much to be feasibly traversed in any way, and also totally unnecessary, right? i mean i just described what the entire list would look like -- a pairing of these values with those values -- in a way that took up much fewer than 204 yottabytes. there's a way to consider and inspect this combinatorial space that's a little more advanced than just "instantiate the entire thing".

so, looking at a card deck, you can linearly number all the cards, 0 to 51. pick an arbitrary suit to come first, let's say wands. 0-12 are the ace to king of wands. then cups, so 13-25 are ace to king of cups, and so on with 26-38 w/ coins and 39-51 w/ swords. now you've constructed a mapping between the nubers 0-51 and the cards in the deck, so you can go back and forth between them, and if you want to know what card is, say, #44 in the deck (6 of swords) you can just calculate that out.

but, specifically, how would you calculate that out? here's the way i've been doing it: 13 ranks. 4 suits. so a given i has a rank that's i % 13, and a suit that's i / 13 (dropping fractional part). 44 % 13 = 5, and 44 / 13 = 3 (these are numbered from 0, so 5 is 6 and 3 is swords). now all you need is these two lists and you can synthesize the lower deck.

anyway all of that is just some dumb preamble. the point is, instead of storing a whole space as a giant array or w/e, you can slice it down to its component axes and store them, which reduces a quadratic storage space to a linear one. and actually, you don't even need to store them! you just need a way to compute the axis's value from a given offset, which could be an arbitrarily-simple computation (if you want to store 'all Int values', you just need to know that each value is its offset plus -9223372036854775808, so the computation there is 'subtraction'). once you do this, you can very easily calculate out arbitrary slices of this space.

if you have a product space that's just a bunch of axes, then all you really need to do is to record a list like [13,4,6,20] that represents the 'length' of each axis, then you can say the offset step for each axis is the product of all the prior items -- one changes every step with a length of 13, one changes every 13th step with a length of 4, one changes every 52nd step (13 * 4) with a length of 6, one changes every 312th step (13 * 4 * 6) with a length of 20, for an overall space size of 6240 (13 * 4 * 6 * 20). you can also use this to decompose an index via shifting radix modulus. if you have a number 0-6239, (let's say it's 2942) first div/mod it by 312: 9, remainder 134. repeat with 52: 2, remainder 30. repeat with 13: 2, remainder 4. so now we have a matching list: [4,2,2,9], which matches that [13,4,6,20] list. whatever this space is of, #2942 has the 5th of 13 values for the first axis, 3rd of 4, 3rd of 6, and 10th of 20. we can then use that to move around the space by adjusting one of the index values, shifting the value by one unit along the selected axis, and then recombining it back into an index to get the 'neighboring' indices along all dimensional axes.

so this lets you move around inside the space! you can explore a local neighborhood, or put together a selection metric that tries to vary all axes as much as possible -- you can use this as a random generator, right, just by rolling a number within the space, but unlike a random-generation function that just produces an output, this has a bunch of tracking variables that structure the space so you can see what's actually going on within in.

things get more complex when you add in sum spaces -- they can also be represented by a list like [13,4,6,20], but here they're, uh, summed, instead of multiplied, so having something that can store both requires a little work to square them together. either one is pretty simple to navigate, but once you merge the two you open up the possibility of having, say, a 5-axis product space plus a sum space, with all that being used as a new set that you multiply by 2 more axes that are both sums of different spaces, etc.

god this post is already so long and i haven't even gotten to the relevant point yet. brief sidebar: code is generally not very complicated, right? the constraints that code is under are like, practical ones about efficiency usually, or code style things like "avoiding boilerplate", or engineering things like "understanding how threads work", or w/e. this code is math, and it's the most involved math code i've ever had to write, because for all i glossed over it in the above paragraph it took me months to figure out the specific differences between sum and product spaces and how i needed to store their tracking data differently and what operations i needed to perform to keep the data valid and coherent across all operations i could do on a space. recreating the code from scratch took like, a day, because all the hard parts were about my own understanding of how math worked. & on the one hand, i'm not actually very good at math, & this code is really making me feel it. on the other hand... well, we'll get there. at some point after some other number of paragraphs.

so haskell has all these typeclasses. a combinatoric space is a Functor, since you can map over it. it's also an Applicative; that's the product operation. it's also an Alternative; that's the sum operation. Semigroup is also the sum operation, and Monoid just introduces an empty space with no values. what other instances does it have? well... i mean, it is Foldable and Traversable. it's just that requires evaluating the entire space, which is profoundly impractical in most cases. likewise, it is technically a Monad, but running =<< on it means evaluating every space in the deck and then merging all the result decks together. so even though that's true, it's not really practical. (i ended up making a separate newtype called SlowEnumerable that has all the technically-correct-but-incredibly-slow instances on it.)

except. well, the reason Monad is slow is because in order to make the result space, we need to know the size of all the output spaces in the a -> m b function. if we knew that already, we could make a very short and fast bind. writing a function that's just like, okay run the function once and assume that it'll always have the same size of output, so now it's really 'just' another product operation. simple! there's likewise some other things you can do for things like e.g., shuffling a deck, because the size of the result space ends up being involved with like, triangular numbers that decrease in a fixed way, so you can write a 'fast bind' around assuming the a -> m b function will have a certain shape to its output. so with certain preconditions, yes, it's possible to write a limited fast monad instance.

specifically, though, something that kept cropping up in the spaces i was making (mostly randomly generated hero characters and/or demon dicks) was an interaction where the space of a new axis was dependent on one specific other axis. for the hero characters, it looked something like this: hero characters come from a tribe, randomly selected. each tribe had a list of heroic professions (adventurer, bard, astrologer, witch, etc). the number and kind of professions was different based on the tribe, but didn't vary on any other values. so, the size of the axis 'profession' depended on the value in the axis 'tribe'. well. we can already decompose a value into its component axes; it's pretty trivial to extract a list of values that vary only by a given axis -- the 'distinct values' of a given dimension. if there's another axis that depends solely on another, then theoretically to do a 'fast bind' we only need to call the a -> m b function once for each distinct value, which (again) reduces a quadratic check with a linear one, which makes that kind of bind totally feasible to run. it also comes up a lot in the actual templates i was writing, so coding it up would be a huge win.

there's just one problem. if you're familiar with, uh, combinatorics & logical constraints you might have already seen it. if we have an axis that depends on another axis, we can use that to filter out values, by having a function that returns size-1 for most values, and size-0 for the filtered values. this is equivalent to a logical constraint system. to have this code work, i'd need to write what's effectively the inner workings of a constraint solver. this is never a good idea. "don't ever write your own solver".

so, yeah okay maybe the reason i've been finding this code incredibly difficult to conceptualize & write down is because it's actually a known incredibly difficult thing to do.

in practice i think the solution here is to have a 'constraint' axis store the length of each 'segment', which is fine for that axis, but then that introduces a problem of like, if you're adding a second unrelated constraint you need to be able to... slice up the space defined by the first constraint&axis into coherent chunks of the second constraint&axis, and i don't actually know if the information needed to do that is actually sitting around anywhere. you might notice that this is a very vague and unclear statement of the problem that dips into specifics i've mostly glossed over so far; this is because this is where my knowledge of what problem i'm even working on runs out and i'm left with half-formed thoughts about actual implementation details.

anyway so this isn't a problem that i've been working on continually but it is something i've been coming back to every year or so for the past five years & making a tiny bit more progress with each time. hopefully one day i'll actually crack it.

it's also worth noting that i have... weird mixed feelings about actually posting this code? iirc when i first started working on it it was around when there was that big FCC RFC about net neutrality, right? and it got this deluge of spam comments from a template. i think i actually made a tumblr post about it at the time, maybe? going like, huh these are fairly formulaic structurally, and they could literally all been generated by the tool i'm working on now. i'm using it to generate cool desert wanderers and gross demon dicks, but this tool has a commercial application too, and that's astroturfing. and if i actually solve this constraint thing -- much less start hosting it with the attached parser so it's real easy to use -- it'll make it a much more powerful tool. but, ultimately, so long as we live in the world anything anyone makes will get used for malign purposes, & i don't think "oh just stop doing anything" is a good solution to that problem. but it is something that weighs on me when i think about finishing this code.

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prettyboymichaels-ao3 · 3 years

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Rewind, Rewire, Reword - Chapter 1: Where Did I Put That Map Again? (Pt. 1)

It’s the week before Wrestlemania 12, he’s preparing to give Shawn Michaels the fight of his life in their 60-minute Iron Man match, and his little brother has decided to drag him out to socialize on an otherwise perfectly ordinary Wednesday night.

Surely, this decision won’t take the course his life was on – and the course his relationship with Shawn was on – and send it into a tailspin.

(Bret Hart/Shawn Michaels ABO AU; NOT Kayfabe Compliant; Words: ~2k; Rating: M; Notes, trigger warning/s, tag list, and chapter under the cut!)

my massive bretshawn abo au is here! as I only have two-ish more scenes to write, and 10 chapters already written to publish on here (separated into smaller “parts” for tumblr, which means I technically have 21 chapters; they’ll be published fully on ao3), I’ve decided to try for an every other day publishing schedule to give myself more time to fully finish this book of the series. so. :) I’ve read and edited and reread and re-edited this more than almost any other fic I’ve written, so HOPEFULLY. I don’t want to edit it MORE after finally PUBLISHING it. sigh. anyway.

tw for: attempted sexual assault. it doesn’t actually occur, but this IS the jumping off point for the fic, and it will be referenced throughout. the tw “references to attempted sexual assault” will be used in any chapter that references it

tag list: @track12to13; @piratewithvigor; @sinderellanightwolf. tell me if you want to be tagged for any future chapters!

It was times like these when he wondered why he ever bothered going out at all.

They’d gotten to California two days before, early, the way they usually did, leaving the morning after their last match to get a head start and not arrive completely burnt out. They’d spent those two days getting acquainted with their hotel room, their rental car, and the stadium gym they were going to be using the next two weeks. However, “California” didn’t just mean “new match”, it also meant “new towns”, which meant “new opportunities to make Bret socialize”. He’d told Owen, repeatedly, in a variety of ways, that the last thing he needed was a fucking wingman, let alone his happily mated younger brother as a wingman, but he’d just brushed off everything he’d said and dragged him out anyway. “You have almost two weeks to prepare,” he’d scoffed, forcing him to change basically as soon as they got back to their room. “When’s the last time you really let loose?” he’d offered, trying to hustle him out almost before he’d had his shoes tied. “I promised mom I’d try something the last time we talked so would you stop digging your heels in, please,” was his final explanation, as he was hailing a cab to take them out of the city and to some smaller town a little less than an hour away, where they’d be less likely to get recognized, because getting mobbed in a bar or a club was always… not great, to say the least.

But it just really wasn’t Bret’s scene. It just really, really wasn’t. He wasn’t twenty anymore, he couldn’t power through a hangover the way he used to, and he wasn’t in the mood anyway, the way he hadn’t been for the last two years Owen’d been trying to set him up. He’d gotten used to being single by now, he’d even gotten used to his mother’s passive aggressive comments about it every time he called home, and, yeah, being used to it didn’t mean he liked it, but trying to find a date at this point in his life wasn’t exactly easy, at thirty-eight years old, in his line of work, with his designation. Honestly, he didn’t know why Owen was still trying so earnestly; the odds of Bret finding a decent prospective partner at some random club in Somewhere, California was so low it might as well be in the ground.

As such, instead of socializing, the way Owen wanted him to, he’d nursed a glass or two at the bar, had a fairly interesting conversation with an older woman who happened to be the designated driver for a group of girls giggling on the dance floor, and eventually called it quits after hitting the bathroom two hours in. It wasn’t even ten-thirty yet, you’d think he could last a little longer, and he could, he was just… bored. His bar mate was corralling her wayward group to leave, and Owen was having a grand time failing miserably at darts with what looked to be a group of regulars, so he just told him he was heading back to the hotel, refused to be guilted into a game no matter how many times Owen batted his eyelashes or how disappointed he looked, paid his tab, and slipped out into the night with a sigh and his hands deep in the pockets of his jacket. It was only slightly cooler outside than it was inside, and it was much less crowded – a few smokers, on the other side of the street, and two people eating a pizza and using the box as their plate a little further down from that. Definitely less busy than Anaheim would be this time of night, and equally less well lit.

There was also, though, something he almost didn’t hear over the noise of the bar:

“…an’t change your mind now!”

“I agreed to go home with you, not you and your fucking friend–”

His foot still raised from where he’d been stepping to the curb to hail a cab, he cocked his head to the alleyway the voices had drifted from – and, there it was, he hadn’t been hearing things, because there was an incredulous laugh, a dull thump, and a pained grunt before another man said, amused, speaking over the rising growls, “C’mon, baby, you really think you’re in a position to turn us down? You’re the one about to go into heat, it won’t matter whose knot you’re taking soon enough.”

Bret was moving before the end of that sentence, rounding the corner to find three figures pressed up against the stone wall beside an open dumpster. They were mostly hidden from the orange street lamps outside the mouth of the alley, but he could still see rough impressions, and they weren’t very promising: two holding the third prone while the third tried to fight back, thrashing and almost snarling with how viciously he was growling, but he was getting nowhere fast, with how successfully he was being restrained. One’s nose was buried in this man’s throat, the other’s teeth visible in the low light as he grinned, and Bret felt his expression twist and harden as he stepped forward. “Hey! You’ve got three seconds to walk away before I make this a fair fight.”

That certainly got their attention, and he saw them all turn his way, their eyes flashing a little in the dark. Parts of their faces were highlighted now – the barest crests of their jaws, their cheekbones, their hair – but he could see the moment their nostrils flared and he was written off as nothing but a nuisance, which was only confirmed when one of them scoffed. “Run away, little beta, this doesn’t concern you.”

And then he turned right back around to continue scenting the man, the omega, who headbutted him so hard in the nose Bret could hear it crack from here. The man howled, staggering away and clutching at his gushing face with both hands, and Bret watched as the omega took advantage of the other man’s stunned disbelief to kick his legs out from under him and send him tumbling to the ground.

Bret didn’t waste any time. He stalked forward, hauling the one on the ground up by the collar of his coat and the waistband of his pants so he could toss him bodily into the open dumpster. The open, empty dumpster, if the clang of metal and yelp of pain were anything to go by. There was a choked off squeal from behind him, and he turned just in time to watch the omega’s leg come back down and the second perpetrator crumple into the fetal position, clutching his groin. That one quickly joined his friend in the dumpster, courtesy of Bret, and the groans and squeaks that resulted from that collision were incredibly satisfying.

He wiped his hands on his jeans before turning back to the omega, raising his hands placatingly when he, too, was met with a sharp, threatening growl. “Hey. You okay? They didn’t hurt you, did they?”

There was an extended moment of silence. “…Bret?”

Oh, perfect, he’d been recognized– …Wait. He knew that voice. He squinted, edging closer, and fuck, now that his eyes had adjusted a little–

“…Shawn?!”

When it sounded like the men in the dumpster were starting to try and gather their bearings, Bret put his hand on – on Shawn’s shoulder and pushed him out of the alley and past the bar, letting his hand fall away and trusting Shawn to follow him as he lead them past another two buildings to turn the corner onto another block, and then a little further still, directly under a street light, far enough to see them coming if they tried it. After getting their asses handed to them so thoroughly, not just by their intended victim but by a little beta to boot, the alphas shouldn’t come sniffing around looking for seconds, but you could never be too careful.

“Jesus, Shawn, what the hell was that?” he hissed, shrugging his jacket off and settling it over Shawn’s shoulders in one fluid motion.

Or he would have, if the man didn’t take an immediate step back and bare his teeth at him, rubbing his arms. Bret scowled. “Can you stop being so stubborn for two seconds–”

“I’m two seconds from kicking you in the fucking balls, Bret, don’t test me,” Shawn barked, taking another step back for good measure. His voice was hoarser than it usually was, and Bret was a little worried about what he’d do if it cracked.

He pinched the bridge of his nose, sucked in a breath through his mouth, and blew it out through his nostrils. “Look,” he settled on, staring at Shawn hard, who stared right back. In the orange light illuminating them, he could more clearly see his rumpled clothes, his wrecked hair, his blotchy face, but if he could compare him to anything right now it’d be a cornered animal. “Just – put it under your nose, okay? I know I don’t have much of a scent, but it’s gotta be better than whatever the fuck they were giving off.”

Shawn scoffed, but flexed his fingers from where they were clutching at his biceps, moving his eyes to his jacket. “Gee, when’s the last time you took a high school health class?”

“In high school, asshole, now take it.”

Shawn curled his lip, looking ready to keep arguing, but, shifting his weight on his feet, decided it wasn’t worth the effort, and snatched the jacket from Bret instead. He paused once he had it, glaring at him like he was expecting him to say something, and when Bret just crossed his arms and gave him a look, he finally shoved it under his nose and took a deep breath. Half the tension in his body released in one fell swoop, and with it came a hitch as he buried his face in the leather completely, his hands starting to shake.

Bret, deciding to give him a modicum of privacy, looked behind Shawn to make sure they hadn’t been followed (they hadn’t) and moved to the curb to finally hail a cab. Two of them passed, occupied, before he heard Shawn move up next to him, his jacket still stuffed under his nose. His eyes were a little red, and a little wet, but his cheeks were dry. “I wanna puke,” he rasped, muffled into the leather, and Bret gave a humorless snort.

“If you’re gonna, do it here,” he said, waving at another taxi, and this one actually responded, starting to pull up. “I sure as hell don’t wanna smell it all the way back to Anaheim.”

That earned him a grumble, more lighthearted than anything he’d heard out of Shawn’s mouth tonight, and Bret hid his relief by walking around the idling cab to talk to the driver at his window, digging out his wallet. “You got a divider?”

“Sure do, brother,” the cabbie told him, jerking his thumb to the backseat and the tinted glass that separated him from it. “Got some wet wipes back there, too. Just don’t leave any stains, huh?”

Bret frowned, because that made it all too clear what he thought they were planning on doing in his backseat, but threw a handful of twenties into the driver’s lap anyway, enough to make his eyes widen comically. “That’s to get us to Anaheim. There’s more where that came from if you get us there in forty.”

“Hell, brother, I’ll get you there in thirty,” the cabbie exclaimed, and Bret straightened back up after giving him the hotel’s address, waving at Shawn to get in on his side, which he did one-handed, slamming the door behind him as Bret followed suit. The divider deafened the cabbie’s music to a low rumble, and, as they pulled off, Bret started digging around in the mesh pocket attached to the back of the driver’s seat until he emerged with the aforementioned wet wipes. He tore the pack open, pulling half of them out in one go and passing them over to Shawn, who took them automatically with the hand that wasn’t holding Bret’s jacket to his nose, but gave him a look that said he had no idea what Bret was trying to do here.

He gestured to his own throat. “For your scent glands,” he explained, and he could see the moment the light went off, because Shawn started scrubbing at either side of his neck like a man possessed. Bret used the rest of the wipes to clean his own hands and stuffed them into his pocket after he was done, sinking back against the creaky plastic seats like they might swallow him up, lack of give or no.

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guiltysecretpasttime · 3 years

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Adversity - 13-B

Labelling this as ‘chapter 13-B’ in tumblr .

Edit: Ended up as part of chapter 13 in A03.

---

Adversity details

Multi-chapter, work in progress, AU, pre-LoK,

Latest status: up to Chapter 12 uploaded in A03

Blurb: Lin and Tenzin are both at the height of their respective careers – she with the Metalbending Police and he with the Air Nation. Questions about their future begin to arise and things come to a head when Lin responded to an emergency call. Would her job take them from each other forever? Eventual happy ending. Alternatively: The one where Lin and Tenzin had to go through adversity like Lin’s dangerous job, a near-death experience, temporary separation and memory loss, unplanned pregnancy and Tenzin’s responsibilities before they end up with a family.

Tumblr chapters 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | go to AO3 for chapters in between | 13

Ao3 link | Ff.net link

---

Adversity – 13-B

There were muffled voices outside of the room and before they could even react, the door was shoved open.

"Chief!"

"Aunt!"

Tenzin usually felt that Toph Beifong was larger than life; never mind her blindness or stature. Today was no exception.

“I received this note at the Jasmine Dragon and I thought - this I have to ‘see’ for myself.” The earthbender entered the room unceremoniously, fingers forming air-quotations to explain her presence. "And lo and behold, you're in bed with Airhead Junior already, so I guess you're doing just fine."

“I’m not in bed – she’s – we’re not -!” Tenzin sputtered, leaning back hurriedly to disguise the fact that half of his body was actually on the bed.

Lin rolled her eyes. “I don’t care that you’re the chief but don’t you ever knock?”

“Were the chief. That’s the past.” Toph perched herself at the end of Lin’s bed. “I’m here as your mother.” She tilted her head. “Surely that’s gotta hold some weight to you?”

“Not a lot, but sure.” Lin tossed, unaffected.

Well-versed in how Beifongs conduct themselves, the airbender knew that both were affected by this meeting under the veneer of snark and nonchalance.

Tenzin sought to make himself scarce. “I -uh – I can leave the two of you alone for now. I think I’ll check if the others have returned from their tour.” He gently extricated his hand from Lin’s grip, squeezing it once and receiving a squeeze back.

He pretended not to see the tears fall from their eyes as the two Beifong women hugged each other when he closed the door behind him.

“Hey Badge.”

“Mom.”

This was private for them.

He breathed.

She’ll be okay.

---

It was a trigger, they confirmed.

Katara explained from Lin’s medical files that Lin was likely submerged in water for quite some time before she was rescued. The sudden sea spray and saltwater must have triggered the memory.

While Lin’s blood pressure was recommended to be monitored closely, the vitals of both mother and child are strong, to everyone’s relief (especially Tenzin’s).

Upon arriving from their tour, Katara immediately went straight to Lin’s room upon hearing of the panic attack. After the routine check-up, the waterbender left the Beifongs alone. There remained to be a strain between Toph and the rest. The last time they had all been together was during Lin’s memorial months back – after she had accused everyone of not trying their best in locating Lin.

***

Toph has been with her daughter for hours now. Su had joined them at some point as well (even if it was with a lot of hesitation).

Everyone was pleased with this development. It was evident in the lightness that was not there before; a lightness that will be there at least until the three Beifongs would rejoin them.

Lin, Su and Toph talking for hours hints of a reconciliation among them. Su had confided in Kya a few nights ago that she had been worrying about her tentative reconnection with her sister. It may seem well and good now but what if Lin regains her memories and decides to retain to original stance regarding Su?

If Tenzin were to be honest with himself, he had been toying with the same fear as well. The spirits know that they definitely had not parted well before The Accident. He had been about to try to salvage their relationship but as far as Lin knew, he was a selfish jerk who was about to discard her for an air acolyte.

“You besotted sap, what are you frowning about now?”

Tenzin turned to his side, where Bumi seated himself on the steps, a teasing smile on his face. He had been absent-mindedly playing with Junior and Huan as they build things in the sand. He was instructed by the boys to throw around the occasional airball to test the strength of their structures or to flatten the sand so they can play more.

At the moment, the boys were attempting to replicate what Zaofu looked like on the sand and so were ignoring him until he needed to do some clean up.

Tenzin’s own brother then nudged his shoulder. “Anything I can do for ya?”

He shook his head no, still lost in thought.

The airbender is happy for Lin, truly. He could not imagine how she might have been feeling the past months – alone, injured, pregnant and with lost memories to boot. He should not and cannot even find it in himself to even be remotely selfish.

And yet…

He wanted Lin.

The laughter of the two Beifong boys drew his attention.

Rather, a family with Lin, he amended to himself. Tenzin sighed.

---

“That was one deep breath.” Bumi continued to observe, patient and knowing his brother well enough that he will speak when ready.

After a few more minutes, Huan managed to use earthbending to create a crevice in the middle of sand Zaofu. Both of them cheered the kids on.

“Uncle, where is Mommy?” Junior spoke up, green eyes darting around. “Can you call her? I think she would like to see what Huan was able to do.” The boy was proud of his brother despite not being able to bend himself.

Bumi grinned, the kid kind of reminded himself of well…himself. Back when Tenzin managed to make his first air wheel.

“Well, kid, I’m sure your mommy would be proud of both of you.” He pointed to the fairly complicated and detailed sand city on the ground. “But I think Su is busy right now.”

“She’s with your Aunt Lin and Grandma.” Tenzin added.

“Grandma’s here?!”

Both kids quickly rushed towards Tenzin and Bumi, grasping Tenzin’s robes in their hands, asking to be led inside to greet their grandmother.

“Is this a good idea?” Bumi whispered to Tenzin, leaning to his side so as to not to be overheard by the excited children, who were running ahead to the rest house.

The airbender simply shrugged. There was obviously something bothering him.

“They’ve been in the room for how long now?” Bumi tried to make light of the situation. “Are you sure they aren’t throwing hands or something?”

“We’ll probably feel the earth rumble if that were the case.”

That was true. Their childhood has been literally punctuated by mini earthquakes whenever the Beifong sisters squabbled.

Bumi played with his beard. “What if the new baby Beifong turns out to be another earthbender? Imagine the chaos.”

Huan and Baatar Junior were shifting their weight from one leg to the other, practically bouncing with excitement as they arrived at Lin’s door ahead of the adults.

Bumi snorted. Figures that Suyin’s spawn were behaved enough to not burst into rooms but could be quite tactless with their words.

Tenzin stiffened as they reach the door to Lin’s room.

Bumi nodded. “Arn’t you going to go in?” At the airbender’s head shake, he took the initiative to open the door. “Knock-knock! Good afternoon, Beifongs!” He was surprised to see Su and Toph flanking Lin from both sides of the bed.

Before he could even remark or tease Lin about it, twin squeals shattered his eardrums and in went Junior and Huan.

“Boys! Don’t jump on your aunt!”

Cute. With the surfeit of Beifongs in the room, Bumi waved at them and exited quietly. He will catch up with Toph later instead.

Still grinning, Bumi turned to Tenzin and noticed he was still awkwardly standing at the corridor. His smile softened, placing an arm around Tenzin’s shoulder. “Do you want to talk about it now?”

---

Before long Tenzin’s worries, fears, and insecurities tumbled out and into his older brother’s ear.

It was quite cathartic, to be truthful.

It was different opening up to his father (the Avatar) or even his mother (who was bound to be as protective as she was judgmental – less so compared to her younger years but still).

Bumi heard him and was not bound to judge him.

Neither did he invalidate his feelings nor did he downplay the airbender’s perceived consequences of the situation.

It certainly also helped that Bumi had been away from Republic City and was able to listen with fresh perspective.

---

“Don’t cancel your dinner. You’ve prepared a lot for it.”

“No…” His voice trailed off. “I’d rather not intrude in their family time.”

“Aren’t you her family, Ten?”

---

“Ah there you are Junior!”

…

“What on earth are you doing in the kitchen? Last I heard this was Lin’s domain.”

“Uh – tonight’s dinner for Lin – I was -.”

“Don’t you dare say you’re postponing it?” It really was discomfiting when Toph Beifong is able to stare at you in the eye. “She had been talking about it, and was particularly excited too.”

“Oh.”

“Oh – indeed.” A beat. “Don’t disappoint her, Junior.” She passed by him to exit the room. And in a lowered voice muttered. “I’m still rooting for you, despite everything.”

----

---

Note: We are getting there~ thanks for the patience and for still reading this.

Been through some tough times the past few days (ironically, after I had thought I could probably write a little bit more). Not quite good yet but better than the past days. Hopefully. Anyhow - let me know what you think :)

#linzin #linzin fanfic #toccatina's fanfics #toccatina wip #toccatina adversity #lin beifong #tenzin #legend of korra fanfic

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argylemnwrites · 4 years

Text

Fight or Flight - Chapter 8: Regret

Pairing: Drake Walker x MC (Riley Liu)

Book: The Royal Heir (canon divergent from the end of book 2)

Word Count: ~3500

Rating: R (language only)

Summary: Thirty one hours since The Walker Absconding

Author’s Note: Shall we even pretend there is a posting schedule at this point? Oh well, another chapter has arrived. This series follows the Walkers, their friends, and Cordonia as a whole after they flee the country with their daughter during Barthelemy Beaumont’s attempted coup. To catch up on this series, check out it’s masterlist. (link can be found via my bio - sorry, Tumblr is once again not putting my posts with links in tag searches)

Drake popped his headphones in, trying not to wake up Bridget as he pulled open a video on his new phone. He was also supposed to be sleeping, at least theoretically. It’s why Riley had gone into the bathroom a couple of hours ago - so that he could turn off the lights and it would be relatively quiet. If he slept now, after all, he would be able to drive through the night. But he’d been wide awake for the past three hours, and at this point, he wasn’t even sure if attempting to sleep was worth it. So he just laid in the dark, his daughter sleeping peacefully next to him. Thank god she wasn’t doing that whole sleep reversal thing she’d been doing last month, where she’d been waking up maybe a dozen times over night. Her being a good sleeper was maybe the one saving grace here.

Today had just been stomach churning since he’d left to go track down a car and supplies. He hadn’t known whether to be grateful or freaked out when he’d returned to the hotel this afternoon, and Riley had a list of things they needed to do typed up on her phone. While he was glad she no longer seemed like she was about to sink into a pit of panic, seeing her planning with this much intensity was just… strange. He couldn’t think of a time she had ever made such a detailed list. She always just adapted to the situation at hand. She never tried to shape the situation herself.

But between what she’d found in her “fugitive research,” and what Hana had told them when she called after the hearing, they were starting to come up with a plan. Hana had told them that Rashad was going to be sworn in as regent tomorrow and that Olivia was technically “investigating” their location at the moment. That as soon as Rashad took on the powers of king-regent, Olivia was going to disclose that Bertrand and Maxwell hadn’t “found” them at Lythikos, so she’d sent Hana to “check” that they hadn’t returned to Valtoria, but that she hadn’t found them there either. They were all repeatedly calling their old phone numbers as well, hoping to make the story believable when Rashad undoubtedly opened an investigation into their disappearance with Bridget.

But all this meant that arrest warrants could be issued as soon as tomorrow morning. The hearing wouldn’t take long, and no one was sure if Rashad would see things as a sign of an attack on all three of them, or if he would correctly deduce that they had made a run for it and willingly left the country with Bridget. Either way, their financial and phone records were likely to be subject to review. And that meant they needed to not be anywhere near Ioannina by the time of the hearing.

The issue was, they wanted to withdraw more cash before the investigation froze their accounts. This meant using the same ATM they’d been using one more time, at 12:01 am when it was a new day and they could withdraw their daily max again without giving anyone a new location to investigate. Then, it would be time to get in the newly-purchased hatchback and drive on to Xanthi, the city they’d chosen as their next stop. Small enough that no one would predict it as their destination, big enough that Riley, a woman of East Asian heritage who only spoke English with a still-persistent New York accent wouldn’t be immediately noticeable. Drake liked that it was past Thessaloniki as well. No one would guess they drove hours further into Greece than a city with an American consulate.

So, in preparation for that drive, Drake needed to be sleeping. Even after several years out of Manhattan, Riley still hated driving, and in all honesty, the thought of her behind the wheel in a country where she couldn’t read the road signs was not reassuring to Drake in the slightest. He wanted to be the one solely responsible for the driving. But that meant he should be napping now. But how was he supposed to sleep at a time like this?

In the past day or so, he’d gone from a very stable existence to literally plotting how to hide out from law enforcement. He’d embezzled money and bribed a used car salesman to look the other way and not require him to register the car for official Greek or Cordonian papers. He’d left the only home he’d ever known, not knowing if he’d ever get to go back. How could anyone sleep after a day like that?

So instead of sleeping, he was watching news coverage of Liam’s speech that he’d given only a few hours earlier. Speculation was rampant as to both why the vote of no confidence was called and as to who the acting regent would be. Who his daughter’s regent would be. Because for the past few hours, the 10 month old sleeping on the mattress next to him had technically been the Queen-Regent of Cordonia.

It was a strange feeling, knowing that going forward, Bridget would be listed as Queen-Regent Bridget in history books, her rule starting today. Liam’s request had kind of always seemed like simple bookkeeping before. Although Liam told the press that Bridget would remain next in line for the throne even if he had children of his own, Drake had always kind of assumed they would readdress the whole situation when Liam actually got married. It had seemed highly likely to him that Bridget would end up just being a temporary placeholder, someone needed to convey stability of the Crown until Liam had a kid or two of his own. And even if she had remained next in line for the throne, Drake never really thought he’d see her take on the title. She was only supposed to rise to that position after Liam’s death.

It was probably something he should have put more thought into, to be honest. But he hadn’t, at least not anywhere near enough. And now there was no great way to undo it. She was the queen-regent now. Abdication for her, as a minor with the title, would be a nightmare at this point. Even if her title was just through the Conclave, the steps that they would have to take to change things now, the support they would need from the assholes who just voted against them and Liam, well… Drake wasn’t counting on that happening any time soon.

He opened up the CBC app to watch another site’s coverage of Liam’s speech, but his phone started buzzing in his hand. The number flashing across the screen had a Cordonian country code, but it wasn’t Olivia or Hana’s burner numbers, which they’d already added to their contact list. This had to be either Liam or Maxwell on a new number. Taking a deep breath, he popped out the headphones and swiped to accept the call.

“Hello?”

There was a brief pause before Liam’s voice came through the speaker. “Hello, Drake.”

Drake didn’t know what to say. It was his turn to speak, but what do you say to someone you’ve known almost your entire life when they lost everything? When you’d let them down? After too many seconds, he finally managed, “So, you… uh, got our new numbers?”

“Yes. Hana and Olivia provided me with them.”

“Right. Well… good. You, uh… you should have our numbers.” Drake ran his hand over his face. He couldn’t be more awkward about this if he tried.

“Indeed,” said Liam, after a beat, “So, how are you all doing?”

“We’re okay, I guess. How are you?”

The pause was longer this time. “It’s been a long couple of days, Drake.”

The weight of that sentence settled over Drake, the guilt he already carried multiplying in that moment. “I’m so sorry, Liam.”

All Liam gave in response was a little hum of acknowledgement, so Drake kept speaking, trying to find some words that would make this better, that would make Liam see how sorry he was.

“We just couldn’t wait around, you know? We didn’t know how things were going to go down, and when Barthelemy started talking about taking Bridget, we couldn’t just risk that, and so we had to do something, right? And I know this leaves you in a tricky spot, but you’ve gotta know, I wish… I don’t know, that we weren’t doing this to you, I guess? But… it’s just fucked up all around, isn’t it?” Drake knew he was rambling, that he'd basically spewed out a whole bunch of garbage, but he just didn’t know what else to do.

“What do you want me to say, Drake? You’re right; the decisions you and Riley made have made things much more complicated for me. Are you looking for me to say that I don’t blame you? That I support this course of action?”

“What else were we supposed to do?” Drake asked. He could hear his voice raising slightly, and he glanced down, checking that he hadn’t woken Bridget, but she was still passed out.

“I told you back when you were trying to have a child that if it ever became too much, to inform me, and we would reserve the proclamation.”

“Are you really trying to tell me that in the middle of everything that was happening yesterday, it would have been a good time to pull you aside and ask to undo all that shit?”

Liam let out a sigh before he answered, “It seems like that would have been preferable to you deciding to commit treason.”

Drake slammed his eyes shut, trying to keep his temper in check. Liam was already dealing with a lot, and he didn’t want to make things worse, but his words were so frustrating right now. “We didn’t even know if you would have the power to undo any of it after that vote.”

“You could have at least waited until we knew the results of that initial hearing. At that point-”

“What if the justice had decided you had no power last night instead of today?” Drake interrupted. He saw Riley coming out of the bathroom and back into their room. She obviously must have heard him on the phone. He just shook his head, trying to reassure her as he kept talking to Liam. “That’s a big fucking gamble to ask of us, Liam.”

“Fine, then some middle-ground or compromise still would have probably been better. You have to know how ill-conceived this scheme you’ve agreed to is, Drake.”

“What would you suggest, then? Sitting around, just waiting to see if we got to keep our kid?”

“Of course not. But if you get arrested and extradited back here, you will absolutely lose custody of your daughter. I would urge you to consider that fact. Additionally, Rashad is not going to be interested in becoming some sort of surrogate parent to Bridget over the next few months.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better? That the man you have lined up as my kid’s regent has no interest in caring for her?” Riley mouthed “What?” at him from across the room, but Drake just waved his hand and shook his head again. He’d have to fill her in later.

“My point, Drake, is that Rashad would likely be very amenable to you and Riley staying with Bridget in the role as her caretakers and-”

“Stop. I’m not going to listen to that shit, okay? You know that’s not the same. You fucking know it, Liam.”

There was a rough sigh before Liam spoke again. “Fair enough. But you have to understand that you have put me in an awful position. And I’m just trying to find a way to minimize the damage caused by your selfishness here.”

“How is looking out for my wife and kid selfish?” Bridget squirmed slightly next to him as his voice climbed louder yet again. Riley must have noticed, because she scurried over and tucked her against her chest, muttering soothing words against the top of her head, trying to keep her from waking up.

“Did you think about how fleeing the country would impact anyone? Your citizens in Valtoria who no longer have a regional leader? The people of Cordonia who no longer have an heir to the throne? Your friends who have advocated for you and your family time and time again? No. You just left. You only thought of yourselves. That is the dictionary definition of selfish, Drake.”

“I’m sorry, but my family comes first. This isn’t fucking up for debate.”

“Well, some of us don’t have that luxury.”

Both Drake and Liam were silent for several seconds. Drake took a shaky breath, trying to get his emotions back under control. “Liam. I’m sorry. I really am. I never wanted to do this to you, and I know you are left cleaning up the pieces here, but I am not going to come back just for Bridget to get trapped inside the country and possibly taken from us.”

“Drake, don’t be so-”

“She’s queen-regent now, so no way we don’t get stopped at the border if we came back and tried to leave again, right? In fact, I bet we wouldn’t be allowed outside the palace with her, and that’s if we’re allowed to be alone with her at all-”

“Now you’re just being dramatic-”

“Am I? Because to me, it feels like you want me to come back and hang my hat on the hopes that Rashad needs a couple of nannies. I get the risks we are taking here. But at least we have a shot of staying together as a family this way.”

“Look, I understand that this is upsetting and frustrating. I’m upset and frustrated, too. All I want is to try and create a united front here. If we are fractured and divided, it is worse for everyone in the long run. We all want what’s best for Bridget.”

“You aren’t part of any ‘we’ here. She’s not your kid. You don’t get a say.”

The silence on the other end of the line was awful. Riley climbed onto the bed and leaned up against the headboard. One arm still held Bridget tight to her chest, but her free hand snaked behind him and rubbed soothing circles between his shoulder blades. It just did little to calm him. He didn’t know if more of his anger was directed at Liam, for presuming he had any say here, or at himself, for getting defensive when he was the one who had hurt Liam and put him in this position.

“I have never interfered in any parenting decisions you or Riley have made with regards to Bridget. In fact, I have given you both an unprecedented amount of freedom and control, knowing that it was an unusual situation. But it seems to me like we have nothing further to say to each other at the moment. You are unwilling to discuss the bigger picture here.”

“Liam, don’t-” Drake started, but Liam just kept talking.

“I understand why you’ve taken this course of action. But it is apparent that your priorities are only your daughter, whereas I need to focus on Cordonia as a whole. So, I think at this point we both need to just devote ourselves to those tasks and not worry about each other.”

It was a dismissal. A line in the sand. Whatever inner circle Liam had, Drake was no longer a part of it. He let out a sigh and swallowed roughly. “I am sorry, Liam. I just don’t know what you expect me to do here.”

“I don’t expect anything of you, Drake. You should just do what you feel is best for your family, and I will do what’s needed for our country.”

“Come on, it doesn’t have to be this way. I still want to help-”

��No offense, but a couple of fugitives are not likely to be a great resource to me at this point. This isn’t a punishment, Drake; it’s just the reality. We’ve both made the choices we needed to make, and now we both need to deal with the consequences. I need to remain focused on campaigning to regain my title, and I’m not going to have the time or energy to devote to aiding your run.”

“I’m not asking for your help, dammit. I just want-”

“What do you want, Drake? You don’t get to have this both ways.”

“I want… I want us still to be friends.”

He heard a heavy sigh before Liam spoke again. “Of course we are still friends, Drake. We just are headed in separate directions at this time, it would seem. You now have this number, though. You can reach me if you need to, and I will do the same.”

“Liam, I-”

“I wish you and your family the best; I really do. And if you change your mind, you can come find us in Lythikos.”

Drake closed his eyes. There was no salvaging this. Liam was boxing him out and closing the door. He was pretty sure having Liam screaming at him would have stung less. “Alright, I get it. Good luck with everything, okay?”

“Same to you. I really hope you don’t regret your decisions here and that you all can remain safe.” And with that, Liam ended the call.

Drake placed his phone on the bed and leaned forward, dropping his head into both of his hands. He swallowed several times, trying to break up the lump in his throat. He was very aware that although Riley seemed to be in a better spot than she was the day before, watching him cry over Liam was not going to instill much confidence. No need to make things more unsettled.

After a few moments, he took a deep breath and sat back up. Riley was staring at him, head cocked and eyes full of worry. He just shrugged and shook his head. There wasn’t much to say, really.

“Here,” Riley said, shifting forward and passing Bridget to him.

“I don’t want to wake her,” he muttered, but Riley continued, sliding Bridget into his arms before leaning against his shoulder, her hand slipping along his neck and her fingers threading through his hair.

“She’ll fall asleep in the car,” she said. Drake watched as his daughter blinked up at him, her face scrunched up like she was going to start screaming, but she relaxed and started to drift back to sleep when he pulled her against his chest and tucked his head on top of hers.

He just held her for maybe a minute, not saying anything. Riley was quiet as well, her fingers continuing to trace little patterns across the base of his scalp. Eventually, she tilted her head against his shoulder and whispered, “Do you want to talk about it or not?”

“No,” he breathed out, “not… not now.”

He felt her nodding, and her other hand settled on his knee. “Okay. Thank you, by the way.”

“Walker, it’s-”

“You don’t need to say it’s nothing. And I know you don’t want to talk about it now. So just… thank you.”

Neither of them said anything for a long while. They just sat there, trying to brace themselves for the reality of the next 24 hours. They would officially be under investigation and likely be charged with kidnapping of the queen-regent. This was the point of no return, far more than any decisions they’d made up until this point.

Oddly enough, Drake felt more confident in their plan than he had even before. As upsetting as his talk with Liam was, it had somehow helped him see why Riley was so reluctant to rely on anyone outside their family. Something about hearing Liam discuss the risks they would be facing in Cordonia as if they were nothing. As if living under the same roof as Bridget should be enough. As if they had time to wait for things to unfold. Well, it made it very clear that they saw what could be compromised and what couldn’t very differently.

He wasn’t sure how long they sat there, but eventually Riley sat up next to him. “Did you get any sleep at all?” she asked as he turned his head to look at her.

“No, not really.”

“Well, we better get going then so we can get some coffee before we hit the road.” And with that she slid off the bed and started gathering their few bags of belongings.

She was right. It was time to move on. So he gently clicked Bridget into her new car seat and did one last scan of the room, making sure they weren’t leaving anything they needed behind.

“You ready?” Riley asked.

“Yeah, Riley. Let’s go.”

Permatag: @walkerswhiskeygirl @riley--walker @bebepac @ravenpuff02 @oofchoices @octobereighth @drakewalker04 @kimmiedoo5 @mfackenthal @thequeenofcronuts

The Royal Romance/The Royal Heir: @ao719 @mskaneko @katedrakeohd @jovialyouthmusic @marshmallowsandfire @axwalker @kingliam2019 @sirbeepsalot @texaskitten30 @princessleac1 @ladyangel70 @dcbbw @yaushie

Drake x MC: @drakeandcamilleofvaltoria @iplaydrake @gibbles82 @drakewalkerisreal @notoriouscs @drakesensworld @drake-colt-lover-99

Fight or Flight: @masterofbluff @burnsoslow @bobasheebaby @shz256 @iaminlovewithtrr

#drake walker #drake x mc #trr au #trh au #trr fanfic #trh fanfic #trr au fanfic #trh au fanfic #king liam #choices fanfiction

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let-it-raines · 5 years

Text

Catch Me If You Can (24/?)

298 days. That’s how long Killian Jones was away from a baseball field. It’s less than a year, only part of a season for him, but it might as well have lasted a decade as he alternated between physical therapy and spending an excessive amount of time sitting on his couch.

But then he came back and won the World Series.

It’s something no one saw coming, and it’s certainly not something anyone who knows about his arm would predict. Now it’s a new season with new possibilities, and anything could happen. On-field reporter Emma Swan will be there to cover it all even if she is not his biggest fan right now.

Asking her out live on-air will do that.

Rating: Mature

a/n: I hope that absolutely everyone is having a fantastic Friday!

Thank you to @resident-of-storybrooke for being my beta and resident turkey expert 😘

Found on AO3: Beginning | Current

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Tag list: @stunningswan @eala-captian @galaxyzxstark @xellewoods @mariakov81 @ultraluckycatnd @royalswan @shey-starsfury @superchocovian @sals86 @iam2307 @ashley-knightingale @karenfrommisthaven @scientificapricot @captswanis4vr @ultimiflos @jamif @idristardis @nikkiemms @resident-of-storybrooke @tiganasummertree @bmbbcs4evr @onceuponaprincessworld @jennjenn615 @mayquita @captainsjedi @teamhook @notoriouscs @kmomof4 @ekr032-blog-blog@cs-forlife @andiirivera @jonirobinson64 @qualitycoffeethings

-/-

“Emma, what are you wearing tonight? Because I know that it’s August and blazing outside, but it’s also not as hot in LA right now as it is in New York, which makes no sense. I just can’t decide.”

Ariel has been rambling to Emma about what she’s going to wear tonight for the past ten minutes, and Killian has watched as Emma has simply responded in little grunts and one syllable words as she focuses on her phone. It’s not at all like Emma to not give someone her full attention, especially someone she likes and enjoys spending time with. But she’s been staring at her phone this entire time, bottom lip continually being tugged back into her mouth by her teeth, and he can’t quite figure out what’s going on in that head of hers.

“Sweetheart,” Eric sighs, rising from his chair in their hotel room to walk over to Ariel’s suitcase to pick up some of her loose clothing, “wear your green dress. I think Emma might be a little preoccupied with work. She does have a game to cover in a few hours, which kind of comes before dinner.”

“Huh?” Emma asks, looking up from her phone, eyes darting around the room, before she’s darkening the screen on her phone and placing it face down on the table. “What are we talking about?”

“Ariel wants to know what you’re wearing to dinner tonight, love,” Killian supplies, arching his brow and nodding over to Ariel. “You’ve been a bit distracted.”

“Oh, sorry, work. Um,” Emma stutters, adjusting her legs in her chair, “I have this, like, blue and white maxi dress that I think I’ll wear, probably with my white sneakers instead of heels because I know I’ll be exhausted after the game and heels are just too much.”

“So casual?” Ariel asks.

“Yeah, casual. That’s okay for the restaurant we’re going to, right?”

“Yeah, it is. Belle’s dad knows the owner because I swear to you that girl has all of the connections in the world, and he’s gotten us a private room so that you guys can come with us.”

“Remind me to thank Belle for that, Swan,” Killian says, reaching over to her and squeezing her forearm. “I rather like getting to go out to dinner with you.”

“Yeah,” Emma smiles, “me too.”

“You guys are so cute.”

“You guys are nauseating.”

The words come at the same time from Ariel and Eric. Ariel is staring at them like they’re both shiny pieces of gold and Eric is scrunching up his nose in disgust, and all Killian can do in reply is shrug his shoulders.

“You guys literally asked us to come in here,” Emma laughs, and he hears her phone buzz again even if she ignores it. “You’re not allowed to complain if we’re guests.”

“Technically, my wife asked you in here because she found out we had an adjoining room, and she has no sense of personal boundaries when it comes to Killian.”

Ariel slaps Eric, her lips parted in surprise. “That is not true.”

“Eh,” Killian sighs, scratching behind his ear, “itit kind of is.”

“Killian Jones, that is not true.”

“Last week you asked me to check to see if you’d managed to shave the back of your upper thigh.”

“That was important! I needed to know if I was walking around with a giant patch of hair.”

“A, it was covered by your dress. No one ever would have had to know.”

“But I knew.”

Killian huffs, falling back into his chair as his hand inches down Emma’s arm so that he can tangle their fingers together and squeeze all the while Eric is rubbing his hands up and down his face and Ariel has her hands on her hips starting him down.

Collectively, they are a mess.

Individually, they are also a mess, but that’s entirely beside the point.

“You guys are all really weird,” Emma finally chuckles, looking over at him with this smile that Killian is sure is the most beautiful smile in the world. “Wear the green dress, A. I’ve got to go get ready to go to work, which all of you probably need to be doing too.”

“We’ve got five hours until the game starts.”

“Yeah,” Emma sighs as she stands up, “and you guys still haven’t done workouts. I’m not interested in dating losers, so I need Killian to get his ass in gear.”

Killian barks out a laugh before reaching forward and slapping Emma’s ass, making her jump a little bit before she’s sauntering out of the room with a very pointed sway of her hips.

The minx.

-/-

Elizabeth Olsen.

Sweet Cheeks.

Batman and Robin.

Professor Jones.

All in all, they’re not the worst jersey names they’ve ever had for Player’s Weekend and all of the ridiculousness that comes with being able to pick the name that goes on the back of their black jerseys, but it’s also not the best. And Killian really doesn’t want to know why Eric chose Sweet Cheeks for his name. That could be entirely innocent, but he’s betting that it is most definitely not knowing he and Ariel.

Just…no. He’s not going there.

Will’s name is probably his favorite considering he almost did Scarlet Witch but decided to be a little more literal so that approximately seven people would understand the reference despite the popularity of the Marvel universe. Robin’s is pretty obvious, and, well, Killian is lazy and simply went with Will’s nickname for him.

None of them have future careers as comedians after this.

Not a one.

But that’s fine. They’ll let other people be funny, and even if he does need to start thinking about his future – as everyone else seems to be lately – today is not that day.

Today is the Saturday of Player’s Weekend, Eric just hit his two hundredth home run of his career, they’re all going out to dinner tonight, and all Killian wants to do is enjoy the day.

Good days should stay good days.

Even if Emma seems distracted and a tad bit distant.

It started when she was staring down at her phone this morning in the hotel room. She said it was work and went back to her normal self, but then when they got back to his hotel room and she started getting ready for work, she was distant again. Some mornings are like that. He gets it. He doesn’t always want to talk to someone or be talking to someone, so he let her be as she curled her hair before pulling it up in a ponytail and then got dressed in a pair of shorts that hug the muscles of her legs and her own customized jersey that Ariel got for her as some kind of further proof that she is part of their team now more than ever.

All it says is “Swan” on the back, but he thinks that’s enough. She deserves it.

But he’s not entirely sure what’s going on with her that has her all distracted, and he never got a chance to ask this morning before the team was taking the bus to the stadium and Emma was getting into a taxi to do the same. She’s five feet away from him in the dugout right now, but he definitely can’t ask. That would be giving away far too much to people who don’t know and can’t know.

Sometimes keeping all of this a secret is exhausting, but until Emma is ready to handle the unfortunate backlash that will come with others knowing, he’s more than good being a little exhausted for her happiness, especially since a lot of the struggle was because he was once an unintentional ass. They’ll keep it quiet as long as they can and then hopefully one day they’ll stop caring so much and simply go to dinner or a play or a jog in the park on a Saturday morning without caring who sees them together.

Emma’s the one who’s been through all of the sexist shit, though, even if he has had a not-so-great relationship with the press, and he’s all for waiting for Emma.

“Damn, it’s hot,” Will huffs as he steps down into the dugout after getting struck out. “I’m pretty sure I’m dying.”

“That sounds like an excuse, Scarlet.”

“Eh, eh eh,” Will scolds as he grabs a cup of water and pours it over his head, water droplets falling off the buzz cut, “today I am Elizabeth Olsen, the younger sister of the Olsen twins. What ever happened to them anyways?”

“I think they design clothes.”

“How do you know that?”

“I am very into fashion. Can’t you tell by how much effort I put into my outfits every day?”

“You don’t even own a Hawaiian shirt.”

“The fact that you think it’s fashionable to dress like a middle-aged tourist is highly questionable,” Killian laughs, reaching over to grab himself a cup of water. It is extremely hot today, and Killian can feel it over every inch of his bones. “Do you also wear your white socks halfway up your calves?”

“You gotta do what you gotta do.” Will flicks the water off of his head and knocks his knee into Killian’s before nodding over at Emma and Jeff as they look at something on Jeff’s camera. “What’s up with Emma today? She seems off.”

Killian’s eyes dart around the dugout, looking to see if anyone is paying any attention, but they’re not, each of them too preoccupied with the game.

“No idea, mate. I’m going to talk to her tonight.”

“Did you screw up somehow?”

“Why does it have to be something I did?”

Will shrugs, kicking his foot at the ground to knock some dirt out of his cleats. “Seven times out of ten, it is.”

“And yet you call me Professor Jones when you have statistics like that.”

“I’m a man of many talents.”

-/-

They win that afternoon.

-/-

“Killian, can you zip up the back of my dress?”

“I tend to like your dresses unzipped, but if the lady insists.”

He can’t see Emma’s face right now, but he knows that she’s rolling her eyes at him. Quickly, he finishes tying his shoes and stands from the edge of the bed to walk over to Emma and move her hair off of the back of her neck so that he can pull the zipper the rest of the way up to cover her back. She’s very obviously just sprayed perfume, the smell of vanilla invading his senses, and he takes a moment to breathe it in before pressing his lips against the back of Emma’s neck and lingering there while his hands find purchase at her hips, pulling her back to him.

“You smell amazing.”

“I bathed.”

Killian chuckles into her neck before kissing her there again and nuzzling his scruff into her skin. “How much time do we have before dinner?”

Emma laughs as her hands pat his over her stomach. “Not enough time to have sex if that’s where your mind is going.”

“Dirty, Swan. That’s not at all what I was thinking.”

“Liar.”

“I’m telling the truth.”

“Okay,” she sighs hesitantly, looking into the hotel room mirror in front of them so that she can actually see him as he can see her, “what do you want to do then?”

“Talk about why you’ve been in a weird mood all day.”

“I have not been in a weird mood all day.”

“Swan, everyone has noticed it.”

“Everyone is imagining things.”

He arches a brow, the disbelief clearly written all over his face. “You can talk to me about anything. You know that, right?”

Guilt immediately weighs down on his stomach at the sound of his own words. Here is he is telling Emma that she can tell him anything, practically goading information out of her, and he still hasn’t told her about his shoulder, about the full, ugly truth of his injury. It didn’t bother him today, not after Archie massaged it, and yet something is still tugging at him to tell her.

Maybe he wants to tell Emma that he’s been struggling with his arm, that he went through more surgeries than she knows, that his scars are more than the ones on his arm and his shoulder. Maybe he simply wants to let Emma know everything, but fears stay strong no matter how fearless he can sometimes be.

It’s the most idiotic thing, still not having the courage to share something with her, but how is he supposed to admit to actually being broken when she doesn’t think that about him?

Or maybe saying it out loud means that he’s fully admitting it to himself, and that might be the scariest part of it all.

When is he going to get over these fears?

But that doesn’t matter. None of it does right now. Something has been bothering Emma all day, and it’s likely a much bigger deal than his own demons fighting for dominance inside of his mind.

“I have some news,” Emma finally says as she tugs her bottom lip between her teeth and raises both brows.

He’s got no clue where she’s going with this.

“Good news or bad news?”

“Good. I mean – ” Emma stops talking and moves out of his embrace, turning around so that she can look at him as she props herself up on the desk. “I think it’s good. I hope it is. It’s just not…it’s not officially confirmed or anything yet, so I didn’t want to say anything.”

Killian gulps, nodding his head along as his mind tries to figure out what exactly kind of news it is that she has. “Love, I’m all for telling me things when you’re ready, but now I feel like I really have to know.”

She chuckles, shrugging her shoulders and making herself smaller. “David, a month or so back, asked me if I wanted to try and be an official commentator for a game, you know? And obviously I said yes. That’s, like, one of the dreams, but I didn’t want to only get it because of David so I’ve been talking to executives and having all of these meetings, and I got an email this morning that they’re very tentatively going to let me work during the Rangers game on Labor Day.”

Holy shit, he thinks.

“Holy shit,” he says out loud too before taking the two steps forward and reaching down to place his arms under Emma’s ass so that he can pick her up in a hug, his excitement for her coursing through his veins and possibly being a little too exuberant. But then Emma’s wrapping her arms around his neck and her ankles around his hips, and there’s nothing else that matters except for how happy Emma is right now. “That’s fucking incredible, sweetheart. I’m so proud of you.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Killian confirms, nodding his head up and down into her neck before pulling back only to press forward again to slam his lips into Emma’s in a messy, happy kiss that never has time to deepen because of the smiles on both of their lips but that is wonderful all the same. “You’re a badass. I hope you know that.”

Emma blushes out of what has to be a bit of shyness, something that is totally unlike her, and all he can do is smile in response and hitch her up a little higher in his embrace while her hands curl into his hair.

“I mean, I have David and I’ve been lucky and I – ”

“Hey, no,” he stops her, walking them over to the bed so that he can sit down since Emma is fully-grown woman and he did play a baseball game today, “don’t diminish your accomplishments because you’ve had a little help. I have too. And enough people try to take things away from you that you don’t need to do that as well. You are incredible, Emma. No protests.”

Her lips curl up at the sides before she leans forward to rest her forehead against his. “Are you just saying all of this to butter me up since you’ll be pitching in that game and want me to say good things about you?”

“Oh, absolutely, love. I fully expect you to talk about me as if I am the greatest baseball player of all time with the greatest ass. I want completely biased treatment.”

“I think that might give away our little secret.”

“Nah. It’ll just show that you have good taste.” Emma sighs against him, and Killian feels all of the guilt wash away from him. This is so incredible for her, and she deserves it. So much. “I am so proud of you, and I love you so much that it’s ridiculous.”

“I love you too, twenty-nine. I’ll try to slide in a very subtle comment about your ass.”

“That’s all I ask.”

There’s a banging knock on the door before suddenly it’s opening and Ariel is walking through the door with Eric right behind her.

“Oh my gosh, why have you guys not been answering my texts? I – oh,” she stops, and Emma buries her face in his shoulder while he rubs his hands up and down her back as some kind of comfort or apology for not remembering to lock the adjoining door between this room. “I didn’t mean to interrupt something. What exactly…what am I interrupting because that’s kind of any interesting position, and I – ”

“A, oh my God,” Killian groans, slowly moving Emma off of him so that she doesn’t flash Ariel and Eric, “you are ridiculous, and you’re not interrupting anything. We are both still fully clothed and ready to go to dinner.”

Ariel shrugs. “If you say so.”

Emma stands up from the bed and adjusts her dress, brushing all of the winkles out of it. “I just need to fix my makeup real quick, okay?”

“You might want to do that too, man,” Eric says as he points at Killian. “You’ve got a bit of red lipstick stuck in your beard, and I don’t think that’s your shade.”

They go to a Mediterranean restaurant in Pasadena, one that Ariel swears has both good food and a private atmosphere where no one will pay much attention to them – not that he thinks anyone in LA really cares about a bunch of baseball players from New York when half of the people in New York don’t care about them – and to her word, as soon as they get there, they’re shuffled into a back room. It’s a bit much, definitely more precaution than anything, but he’s thankful for it anyways as he pulls out Emma’s chair and she settles down next to him with a smile on her face as she and Belle start talking about books that he knows for a fact that Emma hasn’t gotten to read yet since they’re sitting on her bedside table.

Emma has three categories of books placed around the apartment.

(1)On her bedside table that means she’s started but hasn’t come anywhere close to finishing.

(2)On the bookshelf in the hallway between she and Ruby and Graham’s rooms. Those books have been read but are never going to be reread and are collecting dust.

(3)On the coffee table in the living room. Whatever is there is at the top of Emma’s list, and he knows that if he picks it up, he can see folded pages and little marks from where she’s been devouring them.

Every single book Belle is talking about is on that fated bedside table, probably won’t be read until sometime in December when Emma has off from work, but Emma seems just fine chatting away about them with Belle like she has actually read all of them. But then again, Emma and Belle apparently text pretty often, so he’s not surprised that they get along well. Hell, Emma gets along with everyone in his life, even if it’s a little bumpy, and he couldn’t ask for more on that front.

On any front.

Damn. He’s gotten entirely too sentimental today.

“Are any of you actually going to eat an actual meal tonight?” Belle questions as they’ve all ordered their drinks. “Or is this going to be one of those nights where you guys all get grilled chicken and salad?”

“What is wrong with grilled chicken and salad, babe?”

“Nothing. But we didn’t have to go out to eat for that. I could be wearing sweatpants in the hotel.”

“A woman after my own heart,” Emma sighs, picking up the glass of water in front of her and taking a sip. “I feel like the fact that they’re on stricter diets now is good for them and for me, you know? But I also just end up eating all of the bread that Killian doesn’t eat.”

“And I thought that was just me.” Ariel picks up a roll from the middle of the table as she says this, and Killian has to stifle his chuckle. “But Will eats worse than any of them, so I imagine there’s not a lot of leftover bread to begin with.”

“Oi, what’s that supposed to mean?”

“That you eat like you’re a teenager,” Robin answers. “Or my six-year-old son. But then again, sometimes I struggle to get him to eat any food if it’s not in the shape of a Disney character or some kind of chicken.”

“I’m guessing not the grilled chicken you all eat.” “Actually, yes. It’s very popular in his book right now. I think it’s been in nearly every packed lunch he’s had for the past two weeks.”

“I think I’m going to have one of the pizzas,” Killian interrupts, knowing that Robin is about to go into an extremely detailed explanation of Roland’s eating habits. “Or maybe pasta. Possibly the Moussaka. Swan, do you want to get some of the mozzarella balls?”

“Do I want to get something involving fried cheese? Do you even know me at all?”

Killian shrugs, squeezing Emma’s thigh from where his hand has been resting. “I mean, I feel like I’ve got a pretty good grasp on your cheese preferences.”

“Is that an innuendo?” Will asks.

“Scarlet,” Killian laughs, “how the hell would that be an innuendo?”

“Well, you know, with the – ”

“Nope,” Ariel interrupts while raising her arm in the air. “Nope. I am about to have a cocktail and a hell of a lot of pasta, and I am not hearing some kind of weird cheese innuendo that is going to ruin cheese for me forever.”

“But I – ”

“No, Will,” Ariel continues, and Killian can see everyone hiding the smiles on their faces, “don’t even bother. You can talk about all of your cheese innuendos on your wedding day because that is your day and you get a free pass.”

“Well, gee, Ariel, that’s so nice of you to give me a free pass on my wedding day.”

“Yeah, I think I’m going to veto that too. I’m the one who actually sleeps with you, and I don’t want to hear anything cheese related.” Belle shakes her head in disgust, her eyes rolling with the movement. “but speaking of the wedding, I need all of your guys to go have your tuxes fitted at some point since we’re buying them instead of renting them. I know we still have a lot of time until then, but I just know that it’s going to fall by the wayside since we’ll be smack dab in the middle of baseball mating season.”

“I think Belle is calling us unreliable, you guys,” Eric says.

“Yeah, that’s definitely the vibe I was getting,” Killian agrees. “She also basically implied that we’d be fucking like bunnies the moment the season ends and not be able to leave our homes.”

“I mean, I wouldn’t mind that,” Emma laughs, and Killian nearly chokes on air with his laugh.

“Does Roland also need to do this?” Robin asks, completely messing up their conversation? “The tux fitting, I mean.”

“Yep,” Belle answers. “His tux is going to match yours because he’s going to be the absolute cutest ring bearer in the world, even if we aren’t giving him the actual rings.”

“Honestly, good plan. People should not give rings to children, even if supervised. That’s a disaster waiting to happen. Roland can’t even get his homework from the kitchen table to his backpack some days.”

“Where’s the wedding again?” Emma asks, twisting her chair put still placing her hand over his on her lap.

“Pier Sixty in Chelsea. It’s – ”

“Oh, I know,” Emma laughs, and he’s reminded of just how beautiful she is when she laughs. And of how proud he is of her too. And that he should probably officially ask her to be his date for this wedding so that she’s not walking around thinking that she’s not going to be a part of it. “I live in Chelsea. I know all about it. That’s a gorgeous place. The view of the Hudson is incredible from in there.”

“When have you been there, love?”

“Work Christmas thing when I was an intern. Mary Margaret stayed home with Leo, and I got to be David’s plus one, which was really nice if not a bit overwhelming because I definitely had far too many glasses of wine for someone who wasn’t technically supposed to be drinking yet.”

“Scandalous.”

“I try.”

This starts an entire conversation about the wedding, from the food they’re serving to if they’re having a band of DJ. Eric makes the suggestion that they serve hot dogs and soft pretzels like they’re at a baseball game since everything in their lives seems to revolve around baseball, and the glare that Belle shoots him is so sharp that it could cut into the salmon that Killian orders. Honestly, though, finger foods like that are not a horrible idea since he’s never been one for stuff atmospheres with dry chicken or steak cooked in a way that he dislikes, and Killian almost makes a mental note to file something like that away before he realizes that filing information away for a wedding would mean that he is mentally planning his own wedding.

That’s too much for tonight.

But Belle and Will are going with authentic French food because of Belle’s father and her family in France that she gets to visit once or twice a year, and they are having a band. There are also a million other things, ones that he’s having a hard time keeping track of, and despite how many people he knows, he hasn’t actually been to a wedding since Liam and Elsa got married at Elsa’s parents’ house with one hundred other people jammed inside so that there was barely room to breathe, let alone think about dancing or sitting down with a plate of food.

That was a nice day, though. His brother was absolutely beaming, something he always seems to do around Elsa, and all that mattered was that the two of them were together. That’s kind of always all that matters underneath the rented ballrooms and tailored outfits.

What in the world is he ever going to do with his tux after he wears it to this wedding? It’s probably going to sit in his closet and collect dust forever.

“How are we doing the bill tonight?” their waitress asks them after they’ve all eaten and laughed until their stomachs hurt. “Separate? Together? By pairs?”

“Separate,” Ariel tells her. “I go with – ”

“Just put it all on one bill,” Killian interrupts, pulling his card out of his wallet only for everyone to start to protest. “Nope. This is my treat. Honestly, do not try to argue with me. I’m paying for it.”

“You don’t have to do that,” Belle sighs.

“Hush,” Will hisses, and Killian hears Emma laugh next to him. “If Professor Jones wants to pay, let him pay.”

“Thank you, Elizabeth Olsen.”

Will rolls his eyes, but he doesn’t protest. That’s who he is for every game this weekend anyways.

Everyone else gets up to go outside to where their Ubers are going to pick them up while he and Emma wait inside for the bill, Emma still sipping on her drink even though there’s only the slightest bit left in the glass. Quickly, though, he’s signing the check and the two of them are walking through the back entrance of the restaurant so that they don’t have to go through all of the other people.

“So, speaking of getting married,” he starts.

“Woah, woah, woah,” Emma laughs, looking up at him with raised brows and pursed lips.

“Calm down, Swan,” Killian sighs, shaking his head from side to side. “I’m not proposing. I realize I had a poor choice of words there, but I count myself as more of a romantic than to propose by the kitchen of a Mediterranean restaurant.” He doesn’t say that they’re nowhere ready for that. It’s not needed. “I meant to ask you if you would be my date for Belle and Will’s wedding. I realize it should likely be implied, but I like you to know.”

“You planning on keeping me around that long? That’s all the way in December.”

“Of course. I’ve got to have someone to kiss on New Year’s so I don’t look like a loser at my brother’s house, so you’re going to last at least until then.”

“I mean, if you’re spending your New Year’s Eve at your brother’s house, you’re already a pretty big loser.”

Killian throws his head back and laughs before lifting his arm and wrapping it around Emma’s shoulder, tugging her closer to him so that he can brush his lips against her temple before pushing the back door open. “You’re a gem, my love.”

“I’m also apparently your arm candy.”

“Nah, you’d have to be sweet to be that.”

Emma slaps his stomach then, hard, but he doesn’t care as he continues to laugh while they walk to the curb of the sidewalk where their Uber should be any minute now. “You’re being an ass.”

“I’m your ass.”

“Now that’s just weird, twenty-nine.”

“But a good kind of weird.” He kisses her temple again, and Emma’s cheek presses into his shoulder. “Do you want to stop somewhere for dessert to celebrate your big almost promotion? I hate that we couldn’t really talk about it tonight since you didn’t want to say anything until it’s official.”

“It’s okay. We can celebrate when we get back to the hotel, if you know what I mean.”

“By getting that dessert.”

“Exactly,” Emma smiles up at him, pressing her hand against his chest.

#catch me if you can #cs fic #cs ff #captain swan fic #captain swan

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rk800downloading · 6 years

Text

“Save me” Connor POV - Ch. 2 - Connor x Reader

Disclaimer: Wow!! Hey everyone! I’ve been kinda dead for a bit and not on Tumblr at all (school at work!!), so I hope everyone is doing well!

** IMPORTANT NOTICE: I WILL NOT BE DOING A TAG LIST ANYMORE!! **

Just from my now crazy time constraints! Tumblr is weird, and I had to re-tag everyone everytime, which was really time consuming! If you’d like to know when a new chapter comes out, please turn on the notification for this blog (click Connor’s sexy face on the left of this post, and then in the top right corner of my blog, click the little ‘human’ icon and then ‘get notifications’) I don’t post anything other than save me chapters on this blog!

Please enjoy! And and always, thank you to my dear friend @autumn-otome.

MAIN STORY: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 / 11 / 12 / 13 / 14/ 15 / 16 / 17 / 18

CONNOR POV: 1

Connor wrung the cloth, letting water spill through his fingers and splash onto his synthetic skin. He knew what water felt like - the trickling sensations of rain, and the heavy dampness of humidity. He could slow time to a crawl and watch hydrogen bonds forming between droplets or van der Waal forces interacting between his sensors and the stream pouring from the tap.

Connor knew that humans could not observe intermolecular forces, that they could not analyze the amount of water vapour pressing against their skin.

He ran the towel over your curves, erasing the blue from your skin, patting you dry, scrutinizingly placing nanomachine band-aids over any cuts that he could find.

What could a human like you feel?

The temperature of the water or the texture of the cloth?

Or the feeling of Connor’s fingers brushing against you?

//SOFTWARE INSTABILITY ^

Again, Connor blinked at the message in the corner of his vision. The probability that this ‘message’ was a random error had begun to grow further and further from chance, and closer to its occurrence being dependant on you - but why? Why had Connor seen this message four times since meeting you?

He looked over your bare skin one last time, analyzing, discovering. You had scars, marks - intricate and delicate features all canvased across your body. Connor became reminded of art - how each spot seemed to be put in the perfect place, distinguishingly and meaningfully. He wondered if those ‘messages’ had appeared because he thought you were beautiful. Androids always did have the ability to find something aesthetically pleasing - Connor had just never found that ‘something’ until now.

It didn't matter though, he convinced himself until those irritating messages disappeared.

He pulled fresh DCPD sweats over you, letting your unconscious body lean against his as he slipped your arms through the shirt's holes. He carefully slid the pants up your legs, pulling it's drawstring into a neat bow at your navel.

All of these illogical ideas did not matter.

All that did matter was ensuring your help once you woke up.

“She decent?” A voice rang from the other side of the door.

Connor walked over, opening the door to a very impatient gray-haired man. Hank stood, arms crossed, foot tapping - an impressively grumpy scowl across his face.

He paused as he walked into the room, raising an eyebrow. “Phew - you did a good job, huh? You sure you’re not some refurbished cleaning model?”

“Hank.” Connor could barely contain a scoff.

“Heh,” the man chuckled to himself. “How long has she been out now?”

“Nine hours and thirty-one minutes.”

Hank’s grin faded into another scowl. “Damn. GOR’s trail is gonna be cold by the time she does come around.”

Connor went to speak, stopping as your heart rate began to climb and your breathing became quicker. He turned to look at you, pushing his earlier thought processes far from focus.

“Hey, the kid’s awake.” Hank peered at your barely conscious body, folding his arms tightly across his chest again. “She didn’t bump her head or anything did she?”

Connor mirrored the action. “No. I managed to catch her in time.”

Hank’s gaze quickly shifted to Connor, skeptically running up and down his lean frame. He laughed. “With those scrawny arms?”

“Lieutenant,” Connor did scoff this time. “Did you forget I was an android?”

“Ah, screw you.”

Suddenly, your eyes fluttered open, eyelashes illuminated by the LED lights overhead. Connor couldn’t help but commit the color and freckles of your eyes to memory - he didn’t get a chance to notice them the night before.

“Welcome back.” Hank’s expression was soft - contradictory to his irritable one earlier. “You hanging in there?”

Connor continued to monitor your condition. “Her vitals indicate that she isn’t fully awake yet, Lieutenant.”

Hank glanced up, the irritated expression back for a moment before he looked down again. “Cut the formal crap would you? I told you to call me Hank when Fowler isn’t around.”

Cyberlife had programmed Connor to maintain a sense of professionalism - he was the most advanced prototype the company had to offer. Calling the Lieutenant by his first name even when other humans were in proximity conflicted this - but priorities could be changed.

“Sorry...” He began to say, determined to further integrate. “Hank.”

The Lieutenant grinned in response.

Without warning, you sat up - eyes frantically scanning over your hands and then your body. It didn’t take Connor’s analytic abilities to know the question on your mind - “what happened?”

“You’ve been unconscious for nine hours, thirty-two minutes and five seconds.” and 35 milliseconds, Connor thought but did not say aloud. He attempted to smile again, briefly looking up images of ‘friendly smiles’ and trying his best to replicate them. He hypothesized that it was not his smile that Hank didn’t like, or that shocked you the other day - but rather that he had smiled at the wrong time.

But you gasped in response, and Connor’s hypothesis was rejected as fast as you had unknowingly rejected his smile.

“Connor, damn it, you’ve gotta get better at explaining things.” Hank sighed, stepping in to offer an explanation. “Look, I’m Lieutenant Anderson, and if you don’t remember, the pretty boy here is named Connor - we work for the Detroit City PD. We tried to get you out of that crime scene last night but you started screaming - then you passed out. It started when you saw all the thirium so we figured it would be best to clean you up before you came to, but we didn’t have any female staff so-”

“I cleaned you up.” Connor finished, straightening his posture. “I am not a caretaking model by any means, but I think you’ll find your hygienic state satisfactory.”

Your face grew pink - and Connor noticed. Increased heart rate, flushed cheeks - classical symptoms of embarrassment.

“Oh, do not worry. I am a machine after all.” He kept his voice short in an attempt to defuse the situation.

Hank furrowed his brow, lightly kicking the side of Connor’s leg - an indication that he didn’t understand what was going on.

“When I informed her of who cleaned her, I noticed her heart rate elevated.” Connor answered. “So I thought it might assure her to know that, I as a machine, did not try to take advantage of her unconscious state.”

You hid your face and Hank groaned simultaneously.

“Oh, God, Connor!” He landed a hard smack on the android’s back, shaking his hand in pain from the aftershock. “Can you download a subtlety app or something?”

Connor grunted from the impact, hastily queuing social etiquette videos for later analysis.

“... I will make a note of that.”

“Getting this shit show back on track,” the lieutenant sighed as he sat down next to you on the couch. “Can you remember anything of the incident that happened last night?”

“I-” You began to say, but looked as if the words had gotten lost. Instead of finishing your sentence, you sat still - only opening your mouth again to utter the words “I don’t know. I can’t remember.”

“Well, that’s gonna be a problem.” Hank exchanged a meaningful glance with Connor, his lips turning downwards into a frown. “There’s a deviant who goes by the alias of GOR. We’ve been hunting him, but now it looks like he’s hunting you.”

Did Hank think you were withholding information? Connor entertained the idea. “We were able to extract some badly fragmented data from a nearby surveillance camera. The android corpse from the night before protected you - although from the video, its motive is unknown.” He paused, taking a moment to monitor your stress levels.

Almost optimal.

He pushed a bit further. “However, it’s clear that GOR tried to kill you that night.”

Your face became pale again, jaw locked as if you were trying to swallow the information and had choked on it.

Connor reached out, grabbing your hands the way he had when he found you. “You’re trembling.” He spoke softly - it appeared as if you genuinely did not remember.

He had gone too far.

A look of regret flickered across Hank’s face as he realized the same. “It’s a lot to take in kid, don’t force yourself to remember all at once.”

You gulped, blinking hard. “I’m okay.” A whisper escaped your throat. “Please continue.”

Despite your permission, Connor hesitated. You were not a deviant, you would not self-destruct - but something made him falter.

“All of the evidence we have - the android body, the video…” He spoke reluctantly. “It’s the most we’ve had for weeks...”

All that mattered was ensuring your help, he reminded himself. Amanda would overlook these illogical thoughts if he continued to apprehend deviants - especially a deviant like GOR.

“We need your help putting all the pieces together.” His voice took on a convincing tone - although unsure of who exactly he was trying to convince.

But you didn’t respond right away - something was making you falter too. Instead you turned to face the gray-haired man, eyes wide and glossy. “Lieu-”

“Just call me Hank.” He interrupted.

“Hank- what if this GOR hurts you two for being by me? Like the other android…”

Connor froze, having failed to anticipate your response. Hank was a weapons-trained, seasoned officer and Connor was a replaceable machine - an android without emotion or feelings. Why were you concerned?

“You don’t need to worry about that.” Hank spoke first. “Me and pretty boy would never let some deviant prick get to us. Anyways, decide if you wanna help or not, but I’ve got shit to do.” He stood from the couch, making his way to the door. “Tell Connor when you’re ready.”

Connor watched as Hank's back disappeared from sight, more and more questions beginning to formulate and surface into his vision. His sensors fixated on the delicate hand clasped within his - you had never once pulled away from his touch, instead you leaned into it as if the android had a warmth he could share.

“Does holding my hand comfort you?” Connor asked aloud, carefully observing your reaction. Heart rate elevated, again. Breathing shaky, but within normal limits. Blood flow increased to cheeks and ears.

“Y-yes,” You murmured, startled. “It’s very nice.”

‘Nice’. Connor pondered the word. An adjective - pleasant; agreeable; satisfactory.

“I noticed it helped stabilize you at the crime scene when you were unresponsive.” He began to speak openly. “Although I am equipped with a module that helps me easily integrate and adapt to humans, I am unsure as to why my hand would have such an effect on you.”

“It feels nice to hold your hand Connor, that’s why it eases me.” You replied, and the message appeared again - instantly, as if Connor hadn't spent the last nine hours and thirty-eight minutes trying to rid himself of it.

“I see.” He muttered absentmindedly, running another diagnostics program despite having full confidence that it would return with no errors to report - but Connor tried anyways, again and again - unsure of what else he could do.

He looked into your eyes as if they held an answer - but they only held more questions.

//SOFTWARE INSTABILITY ^

This time, the message could barely flicker to life before Connor dismissed it, no longer willing to give the matter any more attention. If this continued, he would lose efficiency.

He would lose purpose.

“Well then,” His voice came out more curt than he had intended. “You may hold my hand at anytime if it helps you. May I continue talking to you about this case?”

Expression bleak, hands beginning to take on a cold sweat - you had noticed his tone, but nodded anyways.

“We’ve spent some time looking for this deviant.” Connor wasted no time getting to the point. “We believe he has ties to red ice manufacturing as well as many other android and human homicide cases - also to reiterate, it is confirmed that he is trying to kill you.”

He leaned forward, giving your hand a small squeeze as he attempted to negotiate. “You are invaluable to this case. I can personally protect you if you agree to help us catch GOR. I’ve done a background check on you. You’re a good girl and I think it would be a shame if anything happened to you.”

And it would be a shame - from Connor’s background check, you were nothing but an upstanding citizen. You moved to the city in your late teens. From there you took on multiple jobs, never late, always with good reviews. You paid your taxes, you had a good reputation.

How did you get mixed up with a person like GOR?

“A good girl?” You giggled, making Connor lose track of his thought processes. “Do you say these things to everyone?”

He tilted his head at the absurd question. She was truly the only ‘good girl’ he knew - not that he could even fathom a situation where he found himself saying it to someone else.

“No.” He decided to respond truthfully. “I’ve only ever said it to you.”

An abrupt rush of heat crept to your face, staining your cheeks pink again - like Connor had already seen so many times today. Was it still embarrassment? Perhaps nervousness or even attraction?

“Will you agree to help me?” He asked, leaning just a bit closer - testing the depths of red that your cheeks would flush.

But you stopped - eyes no longer on Connor, instead somewhere in the distance.

“Do you promise to protect yourself?” You finally replied, gaze steeled in a way that Connor couldn’t understand.

Protect myself?

Connor did not want you to see him as anything more than an expendable android, a machine designed to accomplish a task.

But he now knew that you did.

He knew that you saw him as having a life worth protecting - that you saw him in the likeness of a human. Suddenly everything made sense - why you were embarrassed earlier, why you exhibited those symptoms that you did.

“Is that android’s death bothering you? It’s just a machine.” His face twisted into a frown. “It can be replaced. I can be replaced too if anything should happen to me.”

Connor also knew that you hated what he had just said - but you refused to back down.

“Do you promise to protect yourself?” You repeated, firmer this time.

Connor sighed - the same programmed human tic. “Is that what it’ll take for you to help us with this case?”

“Yes.” You spoke sincerely.

He could see in your eyes that you wouldn’t take no for an answer - but that didn’t matter. Connor knew he was good at being convincing.

“I promise.” He lied.

#detroit: become human #detroit become human #Detroit: BH #DBH #detroit: connor #detroit connor #dbh connor #rk800 #rk800 connor #connor x reader #fanfic #save me

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splendidlyimperfect · 5 years

Link

Gray hasn’t seen Natsu in years - not since he moved away with his boyfriend Joel and Natsu stopped texting him. A chance run-in at a bar brings Natsu back into Gray’s life, but the encounter puts Gray in danger when Joel finds out. Natsu quickly realizes that Gray’s stuck in a cycle of violence, and wants to help him escape. But leaving isn’t that easy, and sometimes loving someone might not be enough.

Chapter Summary: Gray is torn between staying and leaving, and Joel's not making it easy.

Chapters (17/22): 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Natsu Dragneel/Gray Fullbuster, Gray Fullbuster/Original Male Character(s) Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Abuse, Abusive Relationships, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rape Aftermath, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Natsu just wants to help, but Gray feels like he can’t leave, Non-Linear Narrative, Trans Character, Tumblr: FTLGBTales, ftlgbtpride2019, Coming Out, First Love, Angst with a Happy Ending, I promise

**TW for verbal/physical abuse

-----

you young lost sinner

dis· so· nance | \ ˈdi-sə-nən(t)s noun : psychological conflict resulting from incongruous beliefs and attitudes held simultaneously

xvi november

When Sting drops Gray off at the jail later that day to pick up Joel, the first words out of Joel’s mouth are, “I’m so, so sorry.”

He pulls Gray into a gentle hug, kissing the top of his head. “I was so worried about you,” he says, “they wouldn’t tell me anything, just that you were at the hospital.” He pulls back and runs a thumb over Gray’s cheek, brushing the hair out of his eyes. Then he sees Gray’s bandaged hand and makes a soft, sad sound.

“I’m sorry,” Joel murmurs again as Gray presses his forehead against Joel’s shoulder.

“Are you okay?” Gray asks softly, wrapping his arms around Joel’s waist and leaning into him. Guilt creeps back into his chest – he’d spent the day sitting on Sting’s living room floor, cuddling with Frosch and Lector and playing Uno with Rogue – having fun while Joel had was worrying about him.

“I’ll live,” Joel says. His jaw and knuckles are bruised, but otherwise he seems okay. “I’m more worried about you – I can’t believe Tyler tried to pull that shit. Who knows what he would’ve done if I hadn’t been there.”

He kisses Gray’s head again, then takes his hand. Gray lets Joel lead him out to the parking lot, keeping his eyes on the ground the whole time.

Continue reading on AO3

They get back to the apartment just before supper and Bella is ecstatic, jumping around them as her nails clack against the hardwood. Gray kneels down and presses his forehead to hers, whispering, “I’m so sorry, girl, you must be starving.”

Bella licks his face, then runs off to the kitchen to sit next to the pantry.

“You didn’t come home?” Joel’s voice is suddenly much less sweet than it had been, and Gray stands up slowly, turning to look at him.

“I didn’t... you had the keys,” Gray says. “And the rental office is closed, it’s the weekend, so I couldn’t get the landlord to let me in.”

Joel studies Gray for a second, then asks, “where did you stay?”

Gray looks down at the floor, picking at the edge of his bandage. The air is charged, suddenly – a downed wire, live sparks.

The kindness never lasts.

“I...”

“Where did you stay?” Joel asks again.

“I didn’t have anywhere else to go,” Gray says as his stomach ties itself into knots. “I was... I didn’t get out of the ER until really late, and I couldn’t get back in the apartment, and—”

“Where?”

“Please,” Gray whispers, wrapping his arms around himself and keeping his eyes on the ground. “I—I stayed at Sting’s, he took me to the hospital ‘cause I needed the stitches and I... there was nowhere else, I didn’t have my wallet or my phone, and—”

“Stop.”

Gray bites back the excuses and closes his eyes, bracing himself for whatever Joel’s going to do. Everything already aches, and Gray’s pretty sure Joel can’t make it worse.

“I told you to stay away from him,” Joel says. He takes a step toward Gray and Gray flinches, backing up against the wall.

“I didn’t have anywhere else to go,” he whispers.

Why can’t I love you ever last?

Joel’s fingers wrap around Gray’s arm, and Gray tenses, squeezing his eyes shut, but the blow never comes. Instead there’s a deep, rough bark, and Gray looks over to see Bella standing in the doorway to the kitchen, giving Joel a cautious look. When he doesn’t move, she barks again.

There’s a terrifying silence, then Joel lets go of Gray’s arm, pushing him back into the wall. “I can’t deal with your shit right now,” he says, sighing and rubbing his face. “You never fucking listen to me.”

Gray’s not sure if apologizing will make it better or worse, so he just stays quiet.

“I’m going to bed,” Joel says. “Don’t bother me. I’ll deal with you tomorrow.” Then he stalks down the hallway to the bedroom and slams the door behind him.

Gray sags back against the wall, then sinks to the floor, dropping his forehead to his knees. Bella comes over to him and presses her nose to his cheek, and he wraps an arm around her neck, whispering, “thank you.”

She whines and lays down beside him, putting a paw on his leg. When he looks down at her, all he can think about is Joel getting angry enough to hurt her.

“I won’t leave you,” Gray says, running his fingers through her fur. “We’ve gotta keep each other safe.”

-----

Joel leaves for work the next day without looking at Gray. As soon as he’s gone, Gray deadbolts the door and runs to the bedroom, digging out his secret phone.

Natsu answers almost immediately. “Hey, you.” He’s in his kitchen, phone propped up on the table while he drinks his coffee. Gray can see the moment that Natsu realizes Gray’s hurt – his eyes widen and his expression turns heartbroken. “Gray, shit, what did he do to you?”

“It wasn’t him,” Gray says quickly, curling up in the pillows at the head of the bed. “Well, not.... there was a bar fight. I’m okay, though.”

“You don’t look okay,” Natsu says. “What happened?”

“Joel, uh... he punched a guy, it’s... they didn’t charge him with anything, just kept him for a bit until he was sober. I stayed with Sting last night.”

Gray can see how badly Natsu wants to ask why Gray didn’t leave, but instead he says, “I’m glad Sting helped you. He’s a good guy.” Gray nods, staring down at his bandaged hand. “Is there anything I can do?” Natsu asks.

Gray looks over nervously at the door, then takes a deep breath and asks, “if I left... could I stay with you?”

“Of course,” Natsu replies immediately. His expression is a mix of hope and tentative relief, and Gray’s not sure how it makes him feel.

“Not... not yet,” Gray says, looking back down at his hands. “I’m not ready, but he... I...”

“It’s okay,” Natsu says gently. “Whatever you need.”

They talk for a bit more about nothing – Natsu's work, the book Gray’s been reading – and Gray feels the tension start to fade. Every time he talks to Natsu, Gray feels a little bit braver, a little bit more certain.

When they finally hang up and Natsu whispers, “I love you,” Gray believes him.

-----

Now that Gray has talked about it with Natsu, making a plan to leave is a tiny bit easier.

He insists on going back to work right away, even though carrying plates hurts his hand like hell. He needs the tips – he starts taking a few dollars each shift and hiding them in the bottom of the duffle bag in his locker. It’s not enough for Joel to notice, and after three weeks, Gray has almost a hundred dollars saved.

One day, Gray manages to make it to the registry to order new copies of his birth certificate and health care card. His face burns with embarrassment when he explains the situation to the woman who’s helping him, but she quickly waives the fees for him and agrees to mail them to Natsu’s house instead of Gray’s home address.

Each little act feels like taking back a piece of himself – like he’s slowly stitching the broken parts of himself into something resembling a whole.

Joel doesn’t make it easy. The evening after their argument about Gray staying at Sting’s, Joel acts like nothing happened, and he doesn’t bring up Sting again. It leaves Gray in an uncomfortable state of uncertainty, and he hates it.

It’s almost easier when Joel’s angry – even when it hurts.

-----

“I’m really proud of you,” Natsu says one day in late November. It’s cold and snowing outside, and Gray is curled up under the blankets in the bedroom, Bella snoring across his legs.

Gray feels his cheeks turn pink and he ducks his head, not looking at Natsu. They’ve been talking every day – sometimes on Skype, sometimes texts that Gray immediately deletes, even on his secret phone. Every time he pulls it out of the drawer, he’s petrified that Joel will find out, but being able to talk to Natsu is worth it.

“Why?” Gray asks, and he knows the answer, but he’s found that hearing Natsu say it out loud makes it easier.

“You’re taking care of yourself,” Natsu says. “Rogue said you looked better last time he saw you.”

Gray had asked Sting to keep his distance from the restaurant after the blowup with Joel, and Sting had reluctantly agreed. But Joel doesn’t know Rogue, so Rogue has been checking in with Gray every once in a while.

Gray sighs, rubbing his face and then looking up at Natsu. “I’m sorry,” he says, pulling his knees up to his chest.

Natsu frowns. “Why?”

“’cause… I…” Gray makes a frustrated sound. “I want to—to go. But I’m not… I can’t…”

“I know,” Natsu says gently. “It’s okay if you’re not ready. I love you no matter what.”

Gray nods, staring at Natsu’s image on the screen. His chest aches – he wants to be there, wants Natsu to hold him and love him and keep the world away from him for a while.

He’s about to say something else when the front door rattles. Gray freezes – Joel’s not supposed to be home for another two hours.

“I gotta go,” he whispers, then quickly shuts the phone and hides it, closing the bedside drawer as quietly as he can. He’s just scrambled out of bed and over to the closet when Joel appears in the doorway.

“Hey, babe,” Joel says, coming into the room and catching Gray around the waist. Gray’s immediately on edge – Joel doesn’t look angry, but sometimes his smile is worse than a scowl.

“Hey,” Gray says, forcing himself to smile. “You’re home early.”

Joel pulls Gray tight against him and kisses his forehead. “I decided to tell work to fuck off for the afternoon,” he says. “I know I’ve been kind of an asshole lately – I’m just so goddamn stressed out with these reports.”

“It’s okay,” Gray says quickly, wrapping his arms around Joel’s waist and ignoring the bubbling disquiet in his stomach. “Can I make it better?”

Joel shakes his head, slipping his fingers in Gray’s belt loops and leaning back. “Nope. This one’s on me – we’re going out for dinner to that place you like.”

Gray feels like he’s standing on the edge of the high-dive, dizzy and terrified and exhilarated all at the same time. Joel looks so sincere and so happy and handsome, and for a minute he reminds Gray of the boy he met all those years ago.

“You make me a better person,” Joel says, brushing Gray’s hair out of his face and giving him a soft, fond look. “You know that, right?”

Gray’s teetering on the edge – uncertainty is pushing him back, but he’s pulled forward by the potential of something better.

“I do?” he asks, searching Joel’s face for a lie and finding nothing but adoration.

“Yeah,” Joel says. “You’re the only one who puts up with my shit, even when I’m being a dick. I don’t deserve you.”

Natsu’s voice echoes through Gray’s mind – no, you don’t – as Gray’s mind wavers between fear and wanting.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you,” Joel says, kissing Gray on the nose. “I love you so much.”

Gray’s eyes flick over to his bedside table for just a second before he pushes away the image of Natsu and says, “I love you too.”

#fairy tail #ftlgbtales #ftlgbtfics #ftlgbtpride2019 #day 19 #gratsu #natray #gray x natsu #gray fullbuster #natsu dragneel #update #new chapter #prompt #my fic

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shazyloren · 6 years

Text

At The Bar, We Meet

Summary: Dany's had three bad first dates in February alone, perhaps she was only meant for her pink vibrator after all. That's until someone else arrives at the bar having an equally bad time of it.

Notes: As you know, I am taking part in a challenge on tumblr by user @jonerysfics and @mhysaofdragons in which for seven days from Valentines day I am uploading a new one shot. The prompts have been provided and the stories have all been written and I gotta say you're in for a lot of Jonerys content. So Day 3, 16th February, which is when I'm uploading this, the prompt I chose was 'Bad First Date'. This is my spin on a situation many of us find ourselves in on Valentine's day.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17812064

-----

“What’s wrong with me, Viz?” She sighs as she swirls the content of her glass in her hand. “Am I just some sort of freak magnet?”

Daenerys Targaryen had just returned from her third bad date of the month and given it was Valentine’s Day tomorrow it was safe to say she’d be spending it alone with a bottle of Rose and her pink vibrator.

“Nothing is wrong with you, Dany” He implored from the other side of the bar, filling her drink to the brim again. “You’re gonna meet the man of your dreams one day, I promise you. None of these men deserve the average woman let alone you. Your my sister, the best a man could get, I got your back don't worry about it!”

“Thanks” She puts a smile on, thankful for the niceties but in all honesty she just wanted to sit and wonder what had gone wrong.

One of them, had worked at a pet shop, which was fine, until he’d said that he takes the python to bed every night so it gets used to him. There was no way this side of hell she’d get in a bed with a snake that wasn’t attached to a man.

Fucking weirdo.

She shuddered to just think about it.

Another only wanted sex and told her outright from the minute they sat down in a fancy restaurant, turned out she’d arranged a date with a sugar daddy who was willing to give her £3000 for sleeping with him. Not the man to bring home to Rhaella Targaryen.

And then the one she’d just ran from, offered her a gift of his fingernail clippings and a Manchester United shirt. Daenerys didn’t know which one she was more disgusted by, her father never speak to her again if she wore the shirt and the nail clippings was just outright gross.

One day, I’ll date someone normal.

“Scotch, neat please” She hears a northern accent sound from the seat next to her, a sound which she associated with a bad day. At least she wasn’t the only one.

“Coming right up, sir” Her brother nods and fixes the man up with one. Dany turns sideways to glance at the man who has just decided to sit next to her and when she does, her eyes widen with feint recognition.

I know you…

“Jon?” She asks, unsure if it really is him. He turns and looks at her, his eyes confused for a moment while he sips his drink. Then, it clicks into place.

“Daenerys Targaryen?” He becomes nervous, shakily putting his glass down, and they both know why that is. Time flies, this was a blast from the past she had not been expecting.

Damn, he looks like a right snack … she thinks to herself. Jon Snow, she used to go to High school with him over ten years ago. He was a lot smaller then, in terms of muscle, but she could see his arms and torso almost pulsating through the shirt he had on now.

“How have you been? You look great” She almost smiles suggestively, sipping her own drink. She was eighteen when she last looked into those eyes. I sucked his dick in the school toilets in year 10, 15 years old and way inexperienced . Her luck with men clearly hadn’t changed that much. He says he's been good and thanks her for the compliment. “I haven’t seen you in what, twelve years?”

“About that, I just turned 30” He confirms, a look of reminiscing present on his face.

“What you doing in town anyways? Last I heard you’d flown to New York to work” She asked interested more so in his sudden reappearance in town than the lame dates she’d been on. Anything to stop being traumatised by fingernail clippings...

“Oh, I came back years ago” He said with a chuckle, gruff and causing a slight tingling in Dany's ears. “It was a great experience but, I missed home. My sister Sansa fell pregnant with her partner at the age of 20 and I just decided to come home and work and be a good uncle”

“I get that, my friend Missandei is always travelling the world, comes home every few months. Nothing like the comforts of home, she says” She sighed, looking into her once again empty glass. It was strange how the conversation seemed easy.

“You want a refill, Dany?” Viz asks.

“Go on then, brother. Give Jon one too, put it on my tab” She asks and Jon nods in appreciation. “So why you at the bar then? You haven’t happened to finish up a bad date like me? Or should I say I got the hell out of there as quickly as possible”

“Actually, yes” He laughs to her surprise. Maybe today was the day the universe turned on decent people . “Redhead, nice girl or at least I thought so, she wanted me to do the spaghetti scene from Lady and the Tramp with her at Hotel Paris on Baelor’s street”

“Gods above” Dany’s wide eyed response got Jon laughing. “I thought mine was bad”

“Let me guess, hair strands given as a gift?” Jon snorted.

“Close, nail clippings” The laugh on his face dropped as if he was going to be sick. He asks her if she was being serious, she nodded. “He also gave me a Manchester United Shirt so I had to dip on him, I should’ve known something was off when he didn’t want gravy on a roast dinner, what kind of moron doesn’t want that?”

“There are some strange folk around” Jon agreed, both of them kinda silent for a moment. However, Jon instigates the conversation once again. “How about yourself, what have you been up to?”

He’s hot…

Really fucking hot...

Like bend me over your knee and fist me like I'm nothing hot...

Daenerys, behave yourself…

“I run a non-profit” Dany replies, trying to temper her feelings. “It’s for helping women who’s been apart of domestic abuse get their life back on track, help with hygiene and food and school for their children, other than that I work on my father’s board of executives for his solar company which develop more economical ways to create electricity”

“So long story short, everything you wanted to do in high-school didn’t happen” He laughs, they both have to. A familiar memory of her dancing outside the school toilets to entice Jon in, ringing through their minds. What a wild and free-spirited individual she was then...

“I did not become a dancer, no” Daenerys found it really easy to talk to him, perhaps it was his familiarity. “Instead I just become a woman who has every aspect of her life going accept the one she has an interest in working”

“Pah, relationships are shit anyways” He grumbles and Dany can't help but chuckle at him. The distant memory of a redheaded girl leaving him for some other hotshot man came into her mind.

“You're not still upset about her, are you? Ygritte?” She giggles. His solemn silence answers it all. “Jon, that was Year 12”

“Still hurts” He shrugged, striking her as the type to never get over something truly. “Never met anyone like her since”

“Yes, the lying and cheating type is hard to come by” She cackles before gulping the last of her drink. If she wasn’t careful she’d fall off of her chair. “Look, there’s someone out there, bad dates just mean you’re getting through that shit to find them. Optimism!”

“Urgh, I hate that word” Well at least he’s honest…

“Jon” Dany stated plainly. “You do realise you’re a bit of a snack, yeah?”

“I’m a bit of a what?” He blinks, unaware of what is about to come out of Daenerys mouth.

“A snack” She nods. “Look at you, that curly hair still looks as well maintained as it did at our Leavers ball, your eyes are deep and mysterious, you clearly work out, your accent is gruff and sexy and you smile like a child who just found a stash of cupcakes, you’re a total snack”

“Here we go” She hears her brother mumble and walk off to serve other customers. Shut your face, Viz.

“Okay, that’s a lot to process” Jon chortles, but he knows it’s meant in good fun.

“It’s suppose to be a compliment” Dany speaks sincerely, a hand placed on his knee to show her sincerity. “Any girl who acts a fool, or turns you down, or cheats on you, is a fucking moron”

Well done, Daenerys, just open your legs why don’t you, cut to the chase .

Daenerys wasn’t finished. “And anyways, last week I went on a date with a guy who wanted to put me in his bed with his pet Python, so it can’t ever be that bad”

“People are indeed strange” He agrees once more. Fucking hell if he smoulders at me one more time I'm taking my knickers of now and he can fuck me against the bar .

They were quiet after that, just a small groaning of the jukebox behind them playing tunes and the sounds of snooker cues hitting balls. Dany looked around, anywhere but Jon while she collected her thoughts.

Why not?

That’s all she can find herself to say. So what if she sucked his dick once all those years ago, so what if it’s only because they’ve both had bad dates and they were just looking for a bit of human contact. It’s just sex right, she should at least ask or she won’t get.

“Hey Jon”

“-Dany”

They both realised they’d spoke at the same time.

“Sorry, you go first” Jon offered.

“Oh, okay” She nodded, her eyebrow rising as a little smirk appeared on her face. “You wanna get out of here?”

If there’s any justice in the world, you will say yes, Jon Snow.

There’s a moment where she thinks she’s fucked up, but when the same smirking expression is sent back to her, she knows there’s only one place she’s going tonight, and that was the backseat of her car.

“Depends” He shrugs before stepping off of his seat and whispering in her ear. “Are you going to be a bad girl for me?”

Dany starts giggling, completely surprised that her evening was going to be not all bad and actually looked like quite a promising night. The prospect of showing Jon Snow how she'd improved since the blowie in the school toilets days filling her with fire and want. “Is the sky blue?”

"Excellent" Jon grins, gulping his drink and smashing it on the table. He hops off of his bar stool, guides Dany off of hers and smacks her behind with glee when she begins to lead him out the door, a wave goodbye to her brother.

Now this was going to be a good evening...

#Jon snow #daenerys targaryen #jon x daenerys #jonerys #fanfic #jonerysvalentine #mhysaofdragons #game of thrones

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fairydrarry · 6 years

Text

my mid-2018 update

salut! i feel like it’s time for an update. not just on my blog, but on myself too. i went through a seven-book (and eight-movie) series equivalent full of character development in the last year or so, and i lost my passion for drarry in the process. i lost my grip on what enchanted me about these two boys that never knew what was good for them. i knew they would always have a special place in my heart for them, but i had convinced myself that it was time to “grow up,” to lose sight of what i had told myself was a mere adolescent fantasy phase. i made myself believe that i had outgrew draco and harry, and the harry potter franchise altogether.

and then one of my friends recommended a fic. how fitting that tomorrow’s harry’s birthday, huh?

if your finger or cursor is hovering over the ‘keep reading’ button, thank you. i gotta preface that you might wanna come back later if you don’t have the time, though. i’m really about to have a heart-to-heart in the next few paragraphs.

if you visited my blog recently and looked back at the dates of the past twenty or so posts, you’ll see how spread out they are. it’s perfectly okay to assume that i would only come on tumblr once every month and reblog a couple of posts, and then disappear for weeks at a time—because that’s exactly what happened. i’m truly, deeply sorry for that. you didn’t follow a blog to only see a couple of reblogs and no original content once a month. you followed to see interesting content that showed the personality of the blogger, that showed the dedication and love for a ship you also shared. i didn’t mean to let the people who support this blog, and/or support me, down. this blog was meant to be a place to share happiness i felt for these two boys, and instead it felt like more of a responsibility.

during my semi-hiatus, i really went through it. no, not actually facing some life-or-death situations and having to go on missions with my best friends to defeat the dark lord and save the wizarding world, nothing like that. more like, those coming-of-age experiences you have in high school where you find out who you are and how to actually dress respectably. to put it in short, i feel like i aged three years despite only hitting the big one-six.

i didn’t lose only my passion for drarry, but for being creative in general. my pencils no longer had to be sharpened, my journal remained closed, and my wacom tablet collected dust in my closet. it’s sad to think about it, losing my inspiration. looking back, it was like losing a part of me.

then, something brilliant happened. my dear friend sent me a link to a fic at the perfect time yesterday. i was having a sad day, and she wanted to share this fic with me despite me being distant and unreachable for months. even at the time, i couldn’t muster the energy to focus my eyes long enough to read her texts, much less a 12-chapter fic. however, today, i had the energy and the free time to click on the link she sent me. i then continued to lie in bed for the next two hours, cuddled under my blanket with the lights out and my phone brightness on the lowest possible setting as i scrolled and read.

next thing i know, i’m completely submerged in this page of text that describes the characters i used to love so perfectly. i was content by myself for the first time in weeks, and that was enough. i wanted to prolong that feeling of happiness and joy of reading, so i kept on. until i finished.

and so here i sit, feeling like the sixteen-year-old drarry shipper i should have allowed myself to be months ago. i didn’t think i’d be so ecstatic to have back problems in my teenage years.

this is where the update ends. i’ll put a tiny lil review of the fic she sent me. thank you for reading! talk soon xx

Ligabus Filium - Tessa Crowley (tessacrowley)

[ 41.5k | 12 chapters | complete | explicit ]

tags: post-deathly hallows, hp: ewe, bdsm, top harry potter, dom harry potter, bottom draco, sub draco malfoy, virgin draco malfoy, whipping, riding crops, gags, dildos, creative use of time turners, creative use of howlers, creative use of amortentia, listen it’s the running theme of the story ok, it’s filthy bdsm smut what do you what

It should be careful, deliberate, but it isn't. Like every other part of their relationship, it happens gradually and then all at once, before they even realize it. And when the little blue threads bind them together, there's no going back.

b/n: i’ve always been a, how do i put it, slut for soulmate/veela/bond fics, and i’ve been considering the bdsm community as something i’d pursue in my… pastime… so this really got my attention for that too. the fic itself was so fun to read. it’s heavy smut and centered around bdsm so if that isn’t your thing, i don’t recommend it. in addition, there is a character that has strong, explicit homophobia so please be wary of that. however, it captured my heart so fast. the ending is so wonderful and filled my heart with joy.

tldr; heavy smut, hella kinky, and fulfilled my need for backstory within fics. 17/10

#thank you #you all mean the world to me #you don't even know honestly i #i'm just really happy #updates on nessie

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theycallmemoosey · 7 years

Text

Give me Something to Believe In...

Newsies x Last Five Years

Characters - Jeremy Jordan, Ben Cook, Ben Frankhauser, Andrew Keenan Bolger, Fiona (OC), Simon (OC)

Pairing - Jeremy x Reader

Warnings: angst, fluff, swearing…think that’s it to be honest

Word Count: Look, I wrote this on my phone, and I’m not about to count. It’s a long one, so sit comfy

A/N: Wayyyy! Second fic. So, this is deep, and sad, so don’t hurt me. Please. I really tried with this and I know some of it isn’t accurate to real life but hey, just enjoy. It escalates a wee bit quick at the end, so sozzles about that. Oh, and I tried to add a gif, but tumblr wasn’t having that…aaaaaand as always, I gotta thank my rock, @musicaltheatrenerd2002 for just being there for me and motivating me. I wove ya. Anyways, enjoy!

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You didn’t bother to look at the door when you heard the key in the lock, but instead, you snuggled further down into your hoodie and watched the next episode of Stranger Things. You heard the door close, followed by the keys being thrown onto the side table next to the door. You felt a gentle kiss on your forehead and two loving hands massage your shoulders. “Feeling any better?” You tilted your head backwards and smiled at Jeremy, “Not really, but at least I have a voice now” He chuckled, giving you one more kiss before walking over to the other end of the sofa, picking your legs up and placing them on his own. “They’re missing you at rehearsals…” “I’m sure they can live without Katherine for a few days…” “Y/N, it’s been a week” You sighed, pausing the episode, “I’ll be in by Tuesday…it will only take me two more days and I’ll be good as new” “Please get better baby girl…I miss not being able to kiss you” You kicked him playfully, “I’m glad to know that’s all I am to you” He grabbed your feet and kissed one, “baby, you’re so much more than just a kiss. Although, I would like one now” He started to come towards you, and you pushed him back, rolling off the sofa and behind the kitchen counter, “No!!! You’ll get sick! And you of all people cannot get sick!” Jeremy just laughed at you and turned back around on the sofa to watch the TV and you padded back around, placing yourself next to him and snuggling into his side. “Thought you didn’t want me to get sick?” “I need a cuddle…” Jeremy laughed and kissed the top of your head.

A few days later, as predicted, you were better, and walked hand in hand with Jeremy to the studio where you were both rehearsing for Newsies. You met at auditions, and playing opposite roles, of course you both fell for one another. You hadn’t been together for long at all but you both knew how much you loved each other and moved in within the 80th rehearsal. Now, you were at the 168th rehearsal, 12 rehearsals away from opening night. You walked into the studio after Jeremy, greeting a load of smiling boys. Ben was the first to come and hug you after becoming particularly close with you and Jeremy. “Welcome back, missy!” Ben pulled you in tight “Heya Benjamin, how you doing?” “Yeah, good, good. I’m tired, but good” Ben just smiled. You couldn’t help but watch Jeremy talk with one of the other girls. You saw them smiling and laughing and you couldn’t help but feel a bit jealous, but that was until Jeremy looked back towards you and smiled, winking. The rehearsals continued, and yourself and Jeremy walked to the studio together, rehearsed together and walked home together. When the two of you got to spend Sunday’s alone, you would typically chill out at home binging on pizza and Netflix. Sometimes, Jeremy would take you out on a date to a restaurant or the movies after rehearsals, but with the amount of work you were both under, it was a rarity. When the shows started, so did the arguments. He was constantly off to interviews and press nights, leaving you alone every day. The only time you saw each other was on stage. He wouldn’t even talk to you backstage. Instead, you would stand there and watch him talk to the showgirls. He promised it was nothing but you weren’t convinced. He apologised that he was always away from you and he promised to make things better. “Jay, how can you promise that?” “Sweetheart, please! This is our career! Don’t…don’t you want this for us?” “Us?! Jeremy, you’re the only one going to conferences and interviews and parties…it’s fantastic that your career is going great but what the hell am I doing? Is this it for me?!” “No! Sweetheart! Sweetheart, you’re incredible at what you do! Don’t you DARE say otherwise” Jeremy took your arms and stroked them lovingly, trying to reassure you. You tried to get out of his grip, but he resisted. “Babe, Y/N…I’m going to be honest with you. If I didn’t believe in you, I wouldn’t have loved you at all. Y/N, I think you’re the best actress out there…if people can’t see that, they’re blind!” You looked at Jeremy with tears in your eyes, and you took your arms away from him and wiped your eyes with the sleeve of your hoodie. “Come here…gimme a hug…” Jeremy opened his arms and you walked to him, embracing him tightly, crying into his chest, hearing light shushes from Jeremy. Surprisingly, the relationship between the two of you got better. He was more caring and spent more time with you backstage. He went to the same amount of paid interviews, but he refused to go to as many parties if you weren’t invited. The relationship at home got better too, as he would spoil you rotten by cleaning and cooking and doing things that all girls want their boyfriends to do. A few years later, Jeremy and you had a Sunday to yourself. To you, that meant a lay in followed by a day of gaming and pizza, but Jeremy had other plans. He dragged you out of bed at 8 and picked out your outfit, which wasn’t bad for a boy with no dress sense. He took you down to the park, along with a grand picnic. You spent the afternoon by the biggest lake in Central Park, laughing and talking about the cast and crew of the show. In the evening, Jeremy took you by the hand to the bandstand. “You know, we should go see that museum you’ve been wanting to see…” “Next Sunday?” “We’ll see…” “J, don’t tease me like that” you laughed, pushing into his side. Jeremy pulled you into one of his famous bear hugs and swayed you from side to side. He grabbed your hands and spun you around, so that he could grab you from behind and continue dancing. You smiled when you heard him sing I Never Planned On You in your ear. You felt his grip leave you and you turned around, looking into blank space. Confused, you looked down, noticing your boyfriend on one knee. “Jay…” “No, Y/N, let me do the talking!” You laughed, resisting the urge to sob loudly, although you couldn’t stop the tears from falling. “You beautiful, beautiful thing-“ “Thanks Jay” you laughed, crouching down to be eye level with him. You noticed how he was trying to stop crying too. “Just…lemme finish. Anyway, I…I love you so…so much. Baby girl, I…oh god I’m crying now…” he chocked back a sob, taking your hands in his, “Just. Screw the speech. Marry me, Y/N. Jesus Christ, please?” “You pansy” you embraced him in a hug, finally sobbing like a child also, “course I will” Jeremy laughed, tears falling from his eyes as he slipped the ring on your finger. He stood up, pulling you with him and hugging you tightly. Not long after, the two of you got married in front of both your families and all the cast of Newsies. Typically, when yourself and Jeremy kissed, the whole of the cast cheered in true Newsie fashion, causing you to laugh away from the kiss. The shows continued as usual, the audience becoming more and more passionate after the other. Married life with Jeremy made your relationship stronger, although you noticed him look at other girls a lot more. One night, after a difficult show, you flopped into bed and playfully screamed, making Jeremy laugh and make circling patterns on your back. “Babyyyy…what’s the matter?” “I’m tired. Is it Sunday tomorrow?” Jeremy laughed, “no, Y/N, it’s um…Thursday tomorrow” “NOOOOOOO” you screamed into the pillow, curling up into a ball towards Jeremy, who simply pulled you towards him. “How about, we get some sleep tonight, and we’ll spend the morning in bed tomorrow and won’t leave for the theatre until last minute. Pizza and Xbox and films and-“ “You” you looked up at him, pouting your lips for a kiss. Jeremy obliged and kissed you, “and me” he smiled at you and pulled you in closer, rubbing circles on your arm as he turned the TV on. “What do you wanna watch, Y/N?” “A musical…” “Aren’t you bored of-“ “Rent.” Jeremy just laughed at you, “Okay then. Rent it is” Halfway into Will I, you turned to face Jeremy, who simply held your arms. “Jay…” “Y/N?” “I…um…what do you think about trying for…a baby?” Jeremy’s eyes widened and he chuckled once, reaching to pause the film. “I…errr-“ “I’m sorry…I was just thinking about it. I saw a baby outside stage door today and I just couldn’t help but-“ “Sweetie, it’s okay” “You’re gonna tell me you don’t want kids aren’t you?” You frowned. “Actually, no. I couldn’t think of anything better to do. I want to have a baby you or me running around a house, singing songs and dancing like you” You smiled at him, “really?” “Really” “Really, Really?” “Really, really” You squealed, pulling Jeremy into a hug. He rolled you over onto your back, tickling you ferociously before he started to kiss you deeply. A few days later, you went upstate to see your family after you had the news that your sister had fallen critically ill. Jeremy couldn’t come with you as his understudy was also off sick. Obviously, you missed him but you still managed to have a good time with your family anyway. The two of you would call everyday and he would tell you all the gossip of the shows and behind the scenes. Everything was going fine, and soon your sister got better. It wasn’t until you got home and saw her in your bed that you found out about the others. “Jay, I’m home! “ There wasn’t a response, so you set your things by the front door and walked towards your shared bedroom. You could hear the sounds of giggles, but you could only hope that it was the sound of the television and not what you thought it was. You open the door slightly, making as little noise as you possibly could, seeing Jeremy in a bear hug with that one showgirl he took a liking to every day. You stood there, speechless, watching the scene you’ve dreaded for years, unable to look away. You stood there for 30 seconds, but it felt like an eternity. The showgirl, Fiona her name was, spotted you in the doorway and pushed Jeremy off her. He seemed confused at first but followed where Fiona’s gaze was, landing on his wife. “Hey…Y/N” “Don’t. You…” You couldn’t finish. You shook your head and stormed out, grabbing your bag and keys before storming down the stairwell of the apartment blocks. It took you a bit longer than usual as your suitcase was heavy, but you managed to get out the door, hearing the faint shouts of Jeremy. As you began walking down the street, calling taxi after taxi, you could hear your name being called. A taxi finally pulled up and you opened the door, shoving your bag in the backseat. “Y/N!” “FORGET IT!” “Y/N! PLEASE!” You got in the cab and told the driver just to drive, you didn’t know where. You looked out the window and saw Jeremy sprint towards the taxi, slowing down as the taxi sped off. “Miss, I need you to tell me where to go, otherwise I’m gonna be a millionaire by midnight” You couldn’t think of where to go, but then it popped into your head. You walked up the stairs, dragging your bag behind you, trying to make the cries silent. You finally arrived at his door, knocking twice, breathing heavily. “Y/N? Woah, hey…” you collapsed into his arms, your sobs becoming loud. “Ben…I…I…” “Hey, come in, sit down” Ben led you towards his sofa, rubbing your back as you sobbed. Ben pulled your bags into the apartment and shut the door, grabbing the tissues by the door and bringing them over to you. “What did he do?” “More like who…” “You’re kidding…” You shook your head, looking up at Ben’s face, his eyes wide with shock. “Holy crap, Y/N…I…holy Jesus” Ben was speechless, sitting back on his sofa in disbelief. He sighed, before taking your hand, “Y/N, I’m so sorry” You shook your head, leaning into Ben’s side as he hugged you tightly. “Y/N?” “Yeah?” “Can I ask who?” You laughed in a sigh, wiping the tears away from your eyes, “it was one of the showgirls…” “Donna?!” You shook your head slowly, turning to look at Ben. “FIONA?! THAT SLUT!” “Ben…” “NO! I KNEW FROM THE BEGINNING! SHE’S BEEN PLANNING THIS FOR-“ “BEN!” Ben immediately soften his expressions, “sorry, Y/N. I just…I KNEW that she…Jesus Y/N. I’m so sorry…I should have warned Jeremy of her” “It was his decision” “She probably swayed him” “And he still fucked her…” “Jesus. Y/N, I’m sorry” “Stop apologising. This isn’t your fault, at all. I don’t know why I didn’t clock it…” Ben just sighed in apology, and placed a hand on your arm. “Do you want to stay the night?” “I don’t want to invade…I can call my parents and I’m sure that-“ “No. I’ve got a spare room, don’t worry. I’ll go sort the room out and you order pizza” Ben placed the pizza menu in front of you, rubbing your thigh reassuringly before taking your bags into the spare room. That night, the two of you ate pizza and played on his Xbox, although you felt slightly wrong. This was what your favourite pastime with Jeremy was, and you couldn’t help but feel upset while playing your favourite game. At around 1 that morning, you retired to bed, saying goodnight to Ben and stealing a final slice of pizza. You had ignored your phone all night, afraid of what might appear, but you checked the home screen before you got into bed.

18 missed calls from Jeremy. 6 missed calls from Andrew. 2 missed calls from Mum.

Over 50 text messages from Jeremy. ~ baby girl, I’m sorry ~ come home and talk to me Y/N ~ she means nothing to me ~ I married you. I love you. ~ I need you. ~ I’m sorry.

You felt the tears fall from your face before the anger took over and you threw your phone across the room. It didn’t smash, which only made you more angry. You punched the pillow, then your suitcase and then kicked your shoe across the room, all while shouting “FUCK” and “SHIT”. Ben carefully came into the room, noticing you in your state and pulling you into tight hug. You tried to resist but eventually gave in, hugging him back. “I know, he’s an asshole. I’ll talk to him tonight Okay?” “Don’t be mean” “I won’t. Please, promise me you’ll get some sleep, ok?” You nodded, unable to form words. Ben helped you into bed, kissing your forehead and turning off the light before leaving you. He sighed, immediately pulling his phone out of his pocket. He shut down the lights and tv in the front room and brought the pizza into the kitchen before ringing Jeremy in his room. “Hello?” “What the hell, Jeremy” “Is she at yours?” “Yeah” “Thank Christ. I was worried about her…” “You don’t have the right to be! Jesus, Jeremy! Why?!” “It was Fiona’s fault! She-” “Oh yeah, of course this isn’t your fault. You cheated on her for fucksake!” “I love her, Ben, I don’t deny that. She’s everything to me. That’s why I married her! I swear, this isn’t my fault!” “Jeremy, she’s the most amazing woman I know. How fucking DARE you treat her like shit. She-“ “She doesn’t deserve me, I know. She’s perfect, amazing” Ben could hear Jeremy crying, and he sighed in defeat. “Have a long, hard think about what the fuck you’ve done. You’ve broken her. She deserves so much fucking better. Asshole.” With that, Ben hung up, feeling pure rage throughout him. Ben changed into his pyjama bottoms and slipped a plain t-shirt on, before climbing into his own bed. He laid in bed for about 10 minutes staring at the ceiling, debating with himself. He finally sighed, and got up, throwing his duvet across the bed. He silently padded across his apartment, before reaching your room. He opened the door silently and looked at your sleeping form. He walked over to the empty side of the bed, sliding in next to you, pulling you towards him. “Ben?” “Yeah. Hi. Sorry, I just…thought you might want some comfort?” You tensed, not wanting to upset him, so you just hummed and remained still. You felt his breath against his neck and you tried to keep your breathing steady. Suddenly, and unexpectedly, you felt his lips against your neck, and then travelling up your jaw, whilst his hands moved from your waist down to your thighs. You couldn’t take this anymore and you sprung out of the bed, your hands out in front of you in defence. “Ben. No! What the fuck?!” “Oh shit. Sorry. Y/N, I’m so sorry…” “So my HUSBAND cheats on me and you decide that’s your cue to just have sex with me?!” “Y/N, I thought-“ “NO! Holy crap! NO!” Ben just looked down, clearly disappointed and guilty with himself. “Get out. Please. I’m going to…go somewhere…” Ben nodded and walked out the room, leaving you to your thoughts. You made the bed and got changed into the clothes you arrived in. You cried all the while, not believing what was happening. You grabbed your bag and phone and exited, noticing Ben sat in the front room with his head in his hands. You walked down the stairs and onto the streets, unsure of where to go now. You pulled it your phone and called Andrew. “Andy?” “Jesus, Y/N! Are you okay?!” “No…I mean. I know Jeremy told you that side of the story…but…I need somewhere to stay tonight. And I know you’re definitely gay…” “Sorry?” “Ben tried to hit on me…” “Crap. Y/N…I’m coming out right now Okay?” “You’re a saint…” You waited outside Ben’s apartment block for a little while, noticing Ben’s living room light switch off around 2 that morning. Andrew arrived not that long after. You arrived at his apartment and he showed you to his room, taking a spare pillow and duvet to the sofa for himself, although you insisted for him not to. “Thanks Andy…” “No problem. I love you” “I love you too” you smiled at him, as he said goodnight to you and left you alone. The next morning, Andrew surprised you with a bacon and scrambled egg bagel for breakfast and a day of binging on Netflix. At around 4 that evening, Andrew came and sat on the sofa with you after answering emails from various agents. “Y/N, I think you should talk to him…” “Which one” Andrew laughed slightly, “your husband…he’s broken too” “He’s the one that cheated on me” “He was drunk. She spiked his drink. Fiona influenced him. He didn’t know what he was doing…” “Really?” Andrew nodded, taking your hand in his, “despite what you may think, Y/N. He married you for a reason. He does love you, I promise. Just call him. I mean…sweetie, you work together. It’s better to get this out the way before tomorrow’s show…” You nodded in agreement, taking your phone from his hands. He left you alone, after giving you a reassuring kiss on the cheek. The phone ringing was killing you, although his voice stabbed the knife further into the wounds. “Y/N?” “Hey…” “Sweetheart, listen to me. She spiked my drink, I was drunk and high and had no clue what the fuck I was doing. I love you so fucking much baby girl” “Jeremy please don’t lie” “I’m not lying honey. Y/N, I married YOU! I married YOU because I love YOU! Fiona means nothing to me. As soon as I came back to reality, I kicked her out of OUR apartment and I tried calling you, then your mum and then Andrew! Sweetheart, I was terrified you’d-“ “I’m heartbroken, Jay…not suicidal” “Babe, please. I love you! I love you more every single day! Honey, I thought we were going to try and have kids?” “So did I…” You heard Jeremy sigh over the phone, clearly in tears, “will you please meet with me?” “Where and when?” “Bandstand. At 7 tonight?” “Yeah…” “I love you so much, Y/N…” “Bye, Jeremy” You met with him, claiming you didn’t want to but you actually didn’t want anything else in the world. It was dark, the river reflecting the street lamps. You saw his figure in the middle of the bandstand, so you walked over to him, clearing your throat when you reached the stairs. “Y/N…” Jeremy sighed in delight, walking to embrace you. You walked towards him, hugging him tighter than you would have liked to. “Sweetheart, I love you so much…” Jeremy stepped back, tears already rolling down his face. You remained strong, although your hands were still in his. “Jeremy, you have to understand that-“ “Sweetheart, she spiked my drink. I didn’t know what the hell I was doing! You have to understand, I love you more than life itself, I wouldn’t cheat on you…” “Promise?” “I promise. I vow. Hell, I’ll sacrifice myself if that’s what it will take for you to believe me! Sweetheart, I would marry you again and again and add that into my vows!” You laughed, looking up to his eyes. “I love you, Y/N Jordan” “I love you too, Jay” He kissed you, pulling you towards him, almost lifting you up. “I love you I love you I love you” Jeremy began tickling you, making you laugh again, “that laugh is music to my ears…” You smiled at him as he pulled you close and began dancing with you, singing through tears. “I have no use for moonlight…or soppy poetry. Love at first sights for suckers, at least it used to be” he began to cry and you pulled him into a hug, as you finished the song. He kissed you once again, stroking the ring on his finger. “Let’s go home, yeah?” You nodded, turning to go home, but you were quickly swept off your feet, being carried by Jeremy like he did after your wedding. The show the following day felt different, as the connection between yourself and Jeremy felt new and more romantic. You had explained how Ben hit on you the previous night, and you didn’t see, but you heard from Tommy that Jeremy had a huge argument with Ben. You avoided him as much as you could, even keeping space on stage without making it obvious to audience members. One thing you did notice was Fiona wasn’t there. After the show ended, the curtains fell and Jeremy pulled you into a tight hug, kissing you softly on your neck. “Jay?” “Mmhm?” He hummed against your neck. “Fiona’s not here…” Jeremy stood back, although he kept his hands in yours. “I got her fired. I explained to Simon and he sacked her…” “Jeremy that’s…that’s her job” “And I nearly lost my wife because of her. I honestly couldn’t care less…” You shrugged and went upstairs to get changed. Jeremy was waiting for you outside afterwards, with a rose in hand. “Your servant awaits, m’lady” “Does the servant bring me ice cream?” “There’s ice cream waiting at home” Jeremy kissed you, taking your hand and walking home with you. Your contracts were soon coming to an end, and Jeremy had been offered role after role in numerous plays, although there was nothing for you. You couldn’t find a suitable show for you, although Jeremy was highly supportive. “Baby, a show will come, I promise” “Sorry, Mr. I’m being offered every part in every show” “Maybe a part will come up with me. Then we can fall in love all over again” Jeremy began making kissing actions towards you, tickling you. “Yeah…maybe” It was the third to last show, and you were getting ready in your dressing room. You got a call from your mum, telling you that your sister’s illness had gotten worse and unfortunately she had passed. You immediately went to Jeremy’s dressing room, not even bothering to knock. You entered, sobbing, “Jay, I-“ You saw Jeremy breaking apart from a kiss with a random girl. She wasn’t in the show. “Y/N…” he began to defend himself, but you just held up your hand. You watched the random girl leave the dressing room, narrowly avoiding you, scared you would kill her. “Fuck. You.” You simply spat at him, taking your rings off your finger. You placed them both on the table nearest the door, shaking your head as you turned to leave. You stopped at the door, turning to face Jeremy. “How many?” “Y/N…” “HOW MANY?!” “4” “Since Fiona or including her?” “Since…” You pursed your lips and tapped your foot on the floor. “She never spiked your drink, did she?” You watched as Jeremy shook his head, refusing to look you in the eyes. You turned around and slammed the door behind you, frozen still outside, trying not to cry loudly. Ben walked past, noticing you crying. He desperately wanted to comfort you, but couldn’t bring himself to go near you. Instead, he got Andrew. “Ands…it’s Y/N…” Andrew sprung from his seat and followed Ben, running to your side. You hugged him as soon as you saw him. He led you to his dressing room. “Y/N…what’s happened?” “5 girls! He’s been with 5 girls…” you sobbed, your hand shaking in Andrew’s. “5? That’s son of a-“ “Andy, don’t…” “That dickhead can…Y/N, I’m so sorry…” “It’s…I don’t know what I expected” Andrew pulled you into a tight hug, “move in with me. I’ll come and help move all your stuff tonight. I’ll ask Tommy to keep Jeremy out…” “Thank you, Andy…” “Do you want to do the show tonight?” You shook your head, explaining how you had to go upstate. “Why?” “My sister died a few hours ago…” “Holy…Y/N, you poor thing…” “Don’t poor thing me right now, I don’t want to be mocked…” “No, Y/N. I’m so sorry for your loss” “Which one” you tried to laugh, but instead it came out as a sob “Both…Sweetie…I’ll go and talk to Simon. He’ll understand” “Thank you, Andy” “You go get dressed, and go start packing your stuff up. Here’s my key. After the show, I’m heading straight to yours and we’ll go to my house. Okay?” You nodded, hugging him tightly. You walked back with him to your dressing room, noticing a note on the desk.

~ Y/n, I’ve asked Fiona to help me pack my things. I’m sorry that this has crumbled. I just don’t feel the same things I used to when we first got together. I know you’re broken but…we’re both hurting from this. I thought that we would stay together for the rest of our lives, but, clearly that’s not the case. I’m not putting any of the blame on you because this is my fault…we’re too young for all of this. It was too soon…I guess. I hate that your contract is ending soon, but I’m also glad that you can get away from this too. It will help you to move on. Goodbye, I guess… Jay x ~

You sat down in sobs, scrunching the note in your fist. You got changed quickly, handing the costume over to your understudy and thanking her. You ran down the stairs and out the door, finding the fresh air incredibly refreshing. You sped walked to the house you shared with Jeremy, not wanting to call it a home. You started packing your things, making the bed and folding up all Jeremy’s things that were on the floor. You couldn’t help but cry, noticing all the pictures of the two of you on your wedding day and all the other days, including a picture of you and Jeremy in the final number of Newsies as Jack and Katherine. You pottered around the house, leaving post it notes around specific parts of the house, instructing Jeremy on what to do when you weren’t going to be around. It was around 10 when Andrew knocked on the door. You opened it, smiling weakly. He helped carry boxes and bags down the stairs and into his car. On the final load, he took a box down and you looked around your apartment for the last time. You sighed, feeling a tear roll down your cheek. You brought your hand up to your neck, feeling the necklace with a J charm on it. Jeremy had bought you the necklace for your first Christmas together, and you had worn it ever since. You took it off and placed it on the kitchen counter, placing the keys next to it. You shut the door with a final sigh and practically ran down the stairs. For your the final night of your contract, you did the show. It was agonising to play Jeremy’s love interest but you avoided him at all costs backstage, Andrew staying close to prevent Jeremy or Ben coming to talk to you. The kisses you had with Jeremy were agonising, and you could feel how tense he was feeling, although for the finale kiss, he held you tightly, as he knew it would be the last one he would ever have with his wife. When the curtains fell, Andrew immediately came to your side as you both heard “Y/N!” from Jeremy. Andrew told you to ignore him and he pulled you close, walking you up to your dressing room. Another note was left on the desk, with a familiar necklace next to it.

~ I’m so sorry about your sister…she was amazing. As are you. Keep this. It’s yours. All my love in the world, Jay x ~

The necklace you left at your old apartment glistened in the light. You put it on, feeling the familiar J charm once again. You left your costume on the hanger for the last time and collected all your leaving presents and cards from the cast and crew and put them into your large bag. You looked around your dressing room and noticed the note. You put it into your bag quickly, and scribbled a welcoming note for the new Katherine. You turned the lights off and walked down the stairs, joining Andrew by the door. The years went on, and you heard about Jeremy’s success in numerous films, tv programs and shows, all whilst you were waitressing in numerous cafes and restaurants. You went to audition after audition, but no result. Even Andrew was given a part in a new show, which was awesome but heart breaking for you. One night, you were playing on the Xbox once again, when Andrew came home with a guy, obviously both drunk. “Y/N! Meet…” “Marvin” he stuck out his hand dramatically, and you shook it. “Need me to leave, Andy?” “Nah, you’re fine. Just…maybe listen to some music through headphones. Loudly” Andrew smirked at the guy behind him, leading him to his bedroom. You laughed, knowing how hungover Andrew would be in the morning. You plugged your headphones into your phone, pressing shuffle on musical playlist created randomly by Spotify. It started on a song from something called The Last Five Years. It was a pretty catchy tune…but…that voice was so familiar. It couldn’t be. You paused the game and pressed on your phone, anticipating to see the artist. And there it was. Jeremy Jordan. He was in a film? A successful one? You couldn’t help but want to watch it. It took you 30 minutes of debating with yourself before you decided to watch it. The scene unfolded with Anna Kendrick, one of your idols. She was such a good singer, but you thought she didn’t really suit straight, blonde hair. The song was about her husband, Jamie, leaving her. With a note. The camera panned around, catching pictures of Anna and him. Jeremy. Jeremy. Your ex husband. In wedding clothes. You ignored it and watched the rest of the film. The next scene, Anna and Jeremy burst in kissing like wild animals, and you couldn’t help but feel jealous. He was yours for 5 years after all. It seemed…familiar. The film continued and so many things that happened to Cathy and Jamie related so similarly to the relationship you had with Jeremy. Until you pinpointed where the film was actually about you and Jeremy. His character proposed, with the same type speech, in the same exact spot, where Jeremy proposed to you. The wedding was in the same spot. The countless gifts of jewellery. The one necklace with a J charm. The unsuccessful auditions. The countless parties. His note. The film ended, and you were in a state, your jaw wide open. Everything that happened in that movie happened to you and Jeremy. Everything. The noise had quietened from Andrew’s room and so you assumed that Andrew and Marvin were both asleep. You let out the loudest sob you could, crying into a nearby pillow. It didn’t stop. You couldn’t stop crying. It had been years, but you realised that horrible thing that no divorced wife wanted to realise. You still loved him. You don’t remember falling asleep, but you woke up that morning with your duvet over you and the sound of frying bacon in the kitchen. You padded through to the next room, spotting Andrew and Marvin talking over coffee. “There’s my princess!” Andrew opened his arms to you and you hugged him. “Sorry about last night, love. Andrew’s been telling me all about you” Marvin held out his hand, “it’s really nice to meet ya” “You too” you shook his hand and got yourself some water. “Andy?” “Yeah?” “Have you spoken to…Jeremy recently?” His eyes went wide at the mention of his name, but he cleared his throat and shook his head, “Why?” “I want you to watch a film. Over breakfast.” Andrew watched the film with Marvin, and you sat in your room, refusing to watch it again. Andrew knocked on your door after it finished, Marvin cleaning up the plates. “Hey, princess” “Hi” He shuffled over to the bed and sat opposite you, crossing his legs like a child. “It’s about you and him…isn’t it?” “That’s what I thought. But it’s all the same…the way Jamie proposed, where they got married, the parties, the girls, the notes…” Andrew noticed the tears in your eyes begin to form and he took your hand, shushing you. “I’m sorry” “Me too” you smiled at him weakly, before he patted your hand and left the room, telling you to get some proper sleep. You obliged to his request, falling asleep to Love Actually and some Ben and Jerry’s ice cream. You were sure it was nothing. The following morning, you got up for work at the cafe opposite the apartment at the usual time, after making Andrew some breakfast and waking him up so he could stretch and warm up before the matinee. Your day was fairly normal until you saw your ex boss. “Simon?” “Y/N! Wow! Hey! How are you doing?” “Umm…good I guess, yeah. So what can I get you?” “Just a coffee please. Black, if possible” “Yeah sure. No worries” you turned to walk back to the till, but Simon called you back. “Y/N?” “Yeah?” “Seriously? You work as a waitress?” “Alright, Si…don’t rub it in” “No seriously. You’re an amazing actress! Why haven’t you been given a part?!” “There aren’t any right shows for me, I suppose. I’ve auditioned for some but I’m not always perfect” “Would you like to go back to acting?” “It’s my dream, Yeah” “Y/N…I’m doing a live recording of Newsies with the original broadway cast…I was going to send out formal letters but I guess I may as well ask you now as you’re here” You stared at him, speechless, “you’re kidding, right?” Simon shook his head and you squealed slightly, going to hug him. “Of course I will! Wow! Yeah, sure! Shall I tell Andrew or shall I wait for the formal letters?” “Oh you may as well tell him…” “Thank you so much Si! Thank you thank you thank you!” “It’s my pleasure” he chuckled, seeing the excitement on your face “Right, coffee!” You practically skipped to get his order and spent the rest of the day anticipating for your shift to end so you could go home and tell Andrew. He didn’t get in until late that night, but as soon as he entered the apartment you were jumping up from the sofa to hug him. “Y/N? What’s up with you?” He chuckled, hugging you back. “I saw Simon today…” “Simon? As in director Simon?” “Mmhmm…” “And…?” “Oh right. Well…he’s doing a live recording of Newsies with the original cast! That’s you and me baby!” “Oh my god that’s amazing!” Andrew hugged you tightly, trying to restrain you from jumping and breaking the floor. “Y/N?” “Yeah?” “Did you say original cast?” “Yeah…why?” “You know…that means someone else will be in it…” “Who? Ben? Oh it’s fine, I’ll just try and fix things with him” “No…Jeremy?” “Oh…Yeah. Right.” Your demeanour changed drastically from excited to a somewhat tired manner, although you felt defeated. How could you not of thought of this? Andrew watched your excitement fall from your face into sad and uncaring. “Y/N, don’t let him ruin this for you! You’ve had…well, let’s be honest, a dry spell. And this is your break! Again…” “Yeah. Sure” “Y/N…” “No. It’s fine…who wouldn’t want to play the love interest of their cheating ex husband?” “Y/N” “I’ll do it. It’s just gonna be hella awkward” “It will be fine. Just a couple months rehearsing and a few weeks filming. I’ll be there and so will Ben Frankie, Tommy. Simon will understand too….” “Yeah. Thanks Andy” He kissed your temple and you invited him to sit on the sofa and watch the original Disney film together. Rehearsals couldn’t come soon enough. It was amazing to walk back into the studio room and meet with all the old cast, after so many years. You saw Ben Frankie first, practically jumping into his arms when he opened them. “Benny!!!” “Y/N!” “How you doing?!” “Better now I’m with my favourite girl” he smiled, and you playfully smacked him. “Y/N, it’s great you’re here and all but…you gonna be okay?” You nodded, faking a large and over enthusiastic smile. He grinned back, embracing you one more before you greeted the rest of the cast. It was inevitable that you would come back to see Ben Cook. “Hey” you walked up to him, noticing how awkward he felt. “Hi, Y/N. How you been?” “I’m still here, so I suppose I’m alright. Yourself?” “Yeah, good. It’s good to be back…” “Ben?” “Yeah?” “I forgive you. Okay? Jesus we were best friends for years, let’s not let one mistake you made ruin that. Alright?” Ben nodded, a weak apologetic smile forming on your face. He held out his hand, and you shook it playfully before hugging him. “Just, no more mistakes again” “Agreed” he laughed at you, squeezing you tightly once, “you gonna be okay being with Jeremy again?” “It’s work. I’m not gonna talk to him if I can help it” you smiled at him reassuringly. “I’m right by ya” he squeezed your hand before Simon called you all over to the circle of desks for the read through. You sat in between Ben and Andrew, laughing with them as you were handed your script. You could see Jeremy out the corner of your eye. He looked tired, depressed and beaten. You so desperately wanted to go to him but you knew it would be wrong. You both knew this was strictly work and not pleasure, so during the read through, the two of you refused to make eye contact. During the break, you were eating your pasta salad by your bag, scrolling though Facebook and Instagram on your phone. Many fans had heard about the release of the live recording and were bombarding you with good luck messages. You were reading an email from your agent when two feet stood in front of you. You looked up to see Jeremy. You half heartedly smiled at him and continued to scroll through the email. “Y/N-“ “Go away. I’m working” “So am I. I wanna talk to you” “And I want to eat my lunch, carry on with the read through and go home. So if you don’t mind, can you leave me alone?” “Y/N, please. I-“ Andrew walked over, interrupting Jeremy’s pleads, “Jeremy, take a walk. She doesn’t want to talk to you” Jeremy just looked at Andrew and walked back over to his bag, slumping down against the wall and reading through the script over and over. “You alright, princess?” “Yeah. Thanks for saving me” “That’s my job” he plopped down next to you and began digging through your bag, finding the chocolate and breaking a piece off, eating it before you could protest. “That was mine” “I’m your roommate. What’s yours is technically mine” “I’ll remember that next time you tell me off for eating your cereal” “Ah. But cereal is a different matter” “How?!” “Well-“ As if he knew, Simon called the end of the break and summoned everyone back to the desks. You finished the rehearsal and retreated to Andrew, who was talking to Simon about his new additional song. He wanted to sing it through so you got to hear it. It was the most beautiful song in the world. “Y/N, what do you think?” Simon turned to you “Beautiful, Si. Really, really nice” you smiled at him, nodding in agreement. Simon wanted to talk to Andrew privately so you exited the studio, bumping into Jeremy. “Y/N, please can I just talk to you? For 5 minutes? Please?” “Go away” you continued walking down the hallway, trying to get to the stairwell as quickly as possible. “Please! I just want to apologise?” You stopped and turned around to face him, “apologise? APOLOGISE?! JEREMY! You broke my heart into a thousand pieces! You lied to my face! You slept with 5. Other. Girls! Jesus Christ, Jeremy! Is your brain really that fucking small to not think for a second that your ex wife who divorced you for cheating on her is just going to forgive you? You didn’t mean a single word of our wedding vows, and I know you meant every word of our divorce. You’re a fucking joke. I bet you even think I came back for you. I’m just here for Simon. I’m here for the boys. Not for you” Jeremy just stood there, staring at you. His lip was shaking and he tried to form words but you shook your head and left the building, sitting on a step outside waiting for Andrew. You waited for about 15 minutes, thinking about your previous relationship with Jeremy, before Andrew came outside, walking home with you. When you got inside, Andrew called shotgun on the shower first so you retired to your room, changing out of the sweaty clothes and into your robe, waiting your turn for the shower. You were sorting through the laundry when the landline rang. It was odd, as the landline only rang when it was Andrew’s grandmother, but she always emailed first to let him know. You walked over to it, Andrew’s t-shirt in hand, and answered. “Hello?” “Y/N? It’s Jeremy” “Oh my god, now you’re stalking me?!” “No, Y/N, I just really need to talk to you…” “Jeremy, you had your chance. I’ve forgiven you once before, and even then you fucking lied to me! Why do you think ill forgive you now?” “Y/N, I’ve spent the last 5 years in depression from losing the one thing I loved the most. I don’t know what got into me. I loved you and I still do. I know I married you for a reason…” “I know I divorced you for a reason” “Y/N, please just talk it through with me?” “No. Please, stop this. I’m trying to work. Leave me alone” You hung up, not wanting Jeremy to get another word in edge ways. You began to cry into the t-shirt in hand, when Andrew came up behind you, rubbing your arms. “Please wash that again” “Fuck you KB” “I love you too. That was him wasn’t it?” “He’s stalking me, I swear” “He spoke to me on the stairs. I hate him with all my guts, I mean why wouldn’t I? He hurt my girl” “Shut it…” “But anyway, he said he’s never felt more alone and unwanted in his life. He really loves you” “I love him too” “I understand why you’re being like this, I mean I would too if Marvin pulled a trick like this on me…but at least give him a chance?” “I already did” “Every person gets 3 strikes. He’s made 2…let this be his last chance. Who knows? Things may get better” “My life HAS been better. Without him…” “Try it. For me? If you both agree to get on, fantastic. If you don’t? Fine. But at least give it a shot” You contemplated it for a bit, before sighing, “I hate when you’re right” “Indian or Pizza tonight?” “Indian…” “And what film?” “Elf…” “Y/N, it’s the middle of June, you can’t watch a-“ “Elf” “Elf it is then” Andrew chuckled, kissing your temple before going to order the food. The following day, you worked on King of New York with the boys, which was the best day you had in years. The way you all laughed and mucked about, all while doing one of the best songs. It was tiring to do so much tap dancing after so many years, but you felt refreshed after rehearsal. When it ended, Andrew was waiting outside for you and you walked home together. You were halfway down the street when you heard your name. You turned around and saw Jeremy jogging behind you. You groaned and continued walking, but Jeremy grabbed your wrist. “JEREMY! LEAVE ME-“ “You left your phone…” You looked at his hand, which held your phone. You cleared your throat awkwardly, taking your phone from him quickly. You gave him a weak smile, “Thanks…” Jeremy just smiled at you, before walking back towards the studio. You couldn’t quite believe what had happened, and you just turned to look at Andrew, who had a cocky smirk on his face. “Don’t start” “I didn’t say anything!” “Yeah fuck off Andy” “Y/N!” He laughed loudly, plodding alone behind you as you childishly stomped off. Jeremy was typically good at leaving you alone, only talking to you when you were working on a scene together. You admit, it was hugely awkward at first, but as rehearsals continued, you began to share smiles and laughs, feeling more comfortable, although the two of you didn’t talk out of rehearsals. During the last few rehearsals, Simon sent you and Jeremy to practice Something To Believe In, and the kiss…it felt so different. He never did it the way he just did. He grabbed your waist and pulled you towards him with a swift motion. He looked at you for a minute before gently pressing his lips to yours. His other hand ran up your arm and landed on your upper back. You felt your stomach tumble and kissed him back, bringing your arms up from your side up to around his neck. Neither of you attempted to pull away. If anything, you both tried to deepen the kiss even more. Eventually, he stopped, and you rested your forehead on his, panting for your breath again. “Shit” you whispered, laughing slightly. Jeremy laughed with you, bringing his arms to both of your arms, stroking them. “Y/N…I’m sorry” “I know. I’m sorry too” “what do you have to be sorry about? Jesus I put you through hell! What I would do to turn back time and stop myself…” You cleared your throat, pushing away from Jeremy, “maybe we should go over our first song, because I think we’re a bit rusty on the-“ “Y/N…I want to try us again” “What?” “I miss you. So fucking badly…” “Jay-“ “No. Please. I love you so much. I have done since the day I met you, and I have never ever for a singular moment stopped loving you. I would take every fucking mistake back if I could if I knew I wouldn’t lose you. I love you so fucking much…” You sighed in defeat and took Jeremy’s hand, “Jay, I love you too. But this isn’t right” Jeremy kissed your hand, but you pulled it away, “I’m sorry, Jay…” He nodded, smiling at you weakly. As if a miracle happened, Andrew came into the room. “Si wants you two to come in…he’s giving an overview” Jeremy went out quickly, leaving you to plod our behind him. “Alright Princess?” “Mmhm…I just need some ice cream” “I’ve stocked up at home” “I love you” Andrew smiled at you and walked with you to the other room. All the way through the overview, you couldn’t stop thinking about Jeremy. You looked over at him at one point to catch him staring at you. You moved your gaze quickly, smiling at the thought. “Shit…” you mumbled, Andrew catching it. “What?” He whispered. “I’m falling in love…” Andrew just stared at you, anger across his face. “Ice cream. Tissues. Serious conversation.” Andrew whispered harshly, before turning his attention back to Simon. You sighed deeply and slouched back into your chair. Back at home, you felt like you were being interrogated. “Y/N, what the hell?!” “I don’t know…I don’t know I don’t know I don’t know…” “Ice cream. Talk.” You took a spoonful of ice cream, before mumbling to Andrew “he’s him. He’s apologised” “Y/N, he cheated on you” “He was sincere” “Y/N, he’s a cheater” “Hang on, Andy! You’re the one that told me to give him another chance!” Andrew just stared at you blankly, before you pointed at the tub of ice cream, “spoonful” He groaned, taking a spoonful of ice cream, when you both heard the phone ring. “Hello?” Andrew picked up your own phone, fighting you off, “No, she’s in the shower…” “ANDY OFF!” Andrew looked at you, stopping fighting you before handing the phone over to you, taking another spoonful of ice cream. “Hello?” “Y/N, hey. It’s me” “Hey, Jay” “Listen, I was wondering if you were willing to meet with me? Just to talk things over?” You sighed, debating what to do, “Where?” “Bandstand?” “What’s your obsession with that place?” You heard him laugh over the phone, “It means a lot to me. I’ll see you there before rehearsals?” “Sure. See ya” You hung up, flinging your phone across the bed, looking up at Andrew’s shocked face. “I don’t believe you” “You’d hate me if I told you what happened today” “What happened?” You just smirked and left the room, rubbing towards the bathroom like a little kid. “Y/N!!! What happened?!!!” You chuckled behind the door, only leaving when you knew the coast was clear. He was leaning against the wall opposite the door, his arms crossed. “You kissed him didn’t you?” “That’s my job” “For pleasure…didn’t you?” You just nodded at him, smiling cheekily. Andrew groaned and began to tickle you. The next day, you met Jeremy at the bandstand. He was dressed in jeans and a shirt, smart for him to be honest. He held a singular rose in his hand and a small box in the other. “Jay?” “Hey, Y/N…” “What’s all this?” “For you, if you want it?” “Jeremy…” “Y/N, I want nothing more than to make you happy. I’ve learnt from my mistakes and I swear that I will do everything in my power to get us to where we were. I love you with all I have. I’m not asking you to marry me, but I’m asking you if you want to be mine again?” He opened the box, revealing your engagement and wedding ring on a silver chain. “Andrew’s gonna kill me…” “I’m surprised you haven’t killed me” You looked at him, smiling, “Jay, I’ll be yours again. But you gotta work hard to get us back to where we were. We’ll take it slow, okay?” “You’re mine?” “Always have been” you walked up to him and hugged him, hearing his sobs. You shushed him, running your fingers through his hair. He helped you put on the necklace and walked you back to your old apartment. “Jay, it’s a mess!” “I haven’t had you here to help me” “But you’re not incapable” “I’ll walk you home, so you can grab your stuff before rehearsals. I just need to grab my stuff and then I’m set” “I actually don’t want to go home” “Why?” “I’m scared Andrew might kill us” “He’s a petal, he won’t harm either one of us, no matter how angry he is” He walked up to you, kissing your cheek and pulling you in for a hug before walking you home. Andrew was surprisingly supportive, and congratulated both of you before walking with you both to the studio. The rehearsals went on and then filming began, day after day after day. Each day, Jeremy would come over to your apartment with Andrew and take your stuff back to his, until eventually, you were moved back in. Jeremy worked incredibly hard, spending every moment he could with you. He took you out every night and even when you didn’t want to go out, he spent the night with you with a pizza and Xbox, just as it used to be. You truly fell in love with him all over again, and felt like you did before he proposed. The last day of filming was in front of an audience. The thrill of performing in front of an audience again made Jeremy go wild, and he covered your desk with little gifts that reminded you of your marriage with him, excluding the girls. He knocked on your door at the 15 minute call, waiting to walk you down. “Jay, can I ask you something?” “What’s up?” “It’s about that film you did…with Anna Kendrick?” “No, I didn’t get with her” “Jay, not funny…” “Sorry” “Why was it so similar to our relationship?” Jeremy sighed and hesitated slightly, “the director asked me to do it, and I almost turned it down because of our divorce. I went through the story and he loved it. It fit every song perfectly. Didn’t you see it was dedicated to you?” “Was it?” “Mmhm…” “I didn’t watch until the end of the credits…no normal person does” Jeremy laughed and engulfed you in his famous bear hug. “Come on, baby girl. Show time” You smiled at him and walked backstage hand in hand. You fixed your mics and gave each other a final kiss before he went on. You felt so proud in that moment when he was singing, as if he was your husband. He was, truly, even if he wasn’t legally. The show went on and the reaction from the audience was overwhelming. Singing your song again in front of an audience felt amazing and you came off stage nearly in tears. It was coming to the end, and you were singing the final song. As rehearsed, Jeremy pulled you into the final pose. You saw him fiddle with his mic pack before he whispered in your ear. “Marry me? Again?” He stood back, looking at you lovingly. You stood there, trying to catch your breath, unable to form words. Your eyes started welling up and you just nodded, kissing him deeply. The audience went wild and the cast just looked at the two of you as you held on to each other. All the memories of him cheating forgotten. You truly believed he had changed and you had always wanted to spend the rest of your life with him. You promised to love him until death, and you would. He promised to support you in everything you did, and you knew he would. He believed in you and you believed in him. You knew this was right. “Yes!”

#jeremy jordan #ben cook #andrew keenan bolger #Newsies #newsies imagine #newsies oneshot #musical #last five years #reader insert #jeremy x reader #ben x reader

101 notes · View notes

thatwriterchickrachel · 6 years

Text

Mysteries at Midnight - 25.

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply

Fandom: Miraculous Ladybug

Relationships: Adrien Agreste/Marinette Dupain-Cheng; Alya Césaire/Nino Lahiffe; Chat Noir/Ladybug

Characters:

Chat Noir (Miraculous Ladybug)

Ladybug (Miraculous Ladybug)

Alya Césaire

Adrien Agreste

Marinette Dupain-Cheng

Nino Lahiffe

Plagg (Miraculous Ladybug)

Tikki (Miraculous Ladybug)

Madame Bustier (Miraculous Ladybug)

Chloé Bourgeouis (Miraculous Ladybug)

Nathaniel Kurtzberg (Miraculous Ladybug)

Lila Rossi (Miraculous Ladybug)

Additional Tags:

dance au

Ballroom dance

College

Grown up AU

Royalty AU

Language:English

Read on Ao3 [for reliable updates please read on Ao3 I forget about tumblr]

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18 Chapter 19 Chapter 20 Chapter 21 Chapter 22 Chapter 23 Chapter 24

Chapter 25 - Betrayed

Summary: Marinette runs late, a short but sweet coffee date, and of course, betrayal.

Marinette struggled to wake, her eyes stinging against the morning light. She took a moment, face covered by a pillow as the events of the night before flooded back.

Nathaniel was Dessinatuer; and Chat had denied her identity.

Marinette shot up from her bed, pillow flying across the room and landing with a soft thud. She had rung Chat… and Chat had recognised her voice. Surely, he didn’t realise though, Marinette reasoned running her fingers through her hair. He didn’t say anything once she had clarified; he had been half asleep.

“Yeah,” she mumbled to herself. “He was half asleep. He didn’t... he doesn’t...he can’t.” She put her head in her hands, breathing slowly until her phone beeped at her.

She stretched back to pick it up, it slipping from her hands as she read the screen in panic.

Alya: Girl, where r u? Classes r about to start

Marinette was up and running around the room, throwing on clean pants and a large jacket before stuffing a change of clothes into her dance bag and almost forgetting her phone, lying on the floor. She picked it up but it refused to come to her whilst the cord still held it to the wall. Marinette threw an apple into her normal bag and grabbed her keys before locking the door and rushing down the stairs, trying to tug her hair up into a decent ponytail, only to have her hair-tie snap.

With a groan, Marinette shook her head and pulled her hood over her face instead, hoping she didn’t look like a train wreck as she all but ran to campus. The bell rang as she reached the edge of campus, but the grounds were deserted, meaning she was now officially late.

“Marinette?” The soft voice broke Marinette’s jog and caused her to trip and land on her knees. The boy came over to help her.

“A-Adrien, hi,” Marinette replied, keeping her face angled down so he couldn’t smell her morning breath.

“You’re running late too huh?” he asked with a smile, trying to catch her eye.

“Yeah, I really gotta get moving,” Marinette said, repositioning her bag on her shoulder.

“Oh, right, sorry.” Something in his tone wasn’t right.

“A-are you okay?”

“Uh, well…” he hesitated but then shook his head. “You’re late and so am I, I won’t keep you.” He gave a small wave goodbye and walked towards his building but Marinette couldn’t help but follow him with her eyes. His shoulders were slumped and his hair didn’t look brushed. Hadn’t he had a photoshoot that morning though?

She couldn’t stop herself as she jogged to catch up to him.

“Let’s get coffee,” she said, mustering her courage.

“What?”

“We’re already latte for class,” she winked. “What’s another ten minutes?” she reasoned and there was a small spark in Adrien’s eyes.

“I think you’ve been hanging around Chat Noir too much,” he replied and Marinette felt her cheeks flush, “but coffee sounds good,” he finished with a smile.

Five minutes later they were sitting a booth in the café, hands wrapped around their drinks in silence.

“So… are you gonna tell me why you asked me out?” Adrien asked and Marinette looked up in shock.

“Wh-wha- I didn’t ask-” she stammered but he gave a good-natured chuckle.

“Relax, Mari. I was joking,” Adrien said, reaching a hand towards her but she pulled away a little. He frowned. “What’s wrong?”

“N-nothing. Just a bad night, I guess. Had trouble sleeping,” Marinette replied before taking a long sip of her latte to stop her from confessing.

“Ah, seems we were both afflicted. Rough night for me too.”

“Is that why you skipped your photoshoot this morning?”

“What?”

“What?” Marinette asked quickly, realising what she had said.

“Why would you think that?” Adrien asked, his eyes searching hers.

“Um, well,” Marinette swallowed hard. “Your hair isn’t as… what I mean to say is… there’s no hairspray. It sits naturally today, and that’s not a bad thing,” she added hurriedly. “Plus, you haven’t got that… model look, today.”

Adrien raised an eyebrow. “Model look?”

“Well, no I mean, you always look good, and you are a gorgeous model, I just mean that, um, like, you aren’t wearing make-up or anything and you skin is natural too, like your hair.” She let out a sigh of defeat, she wasn’t saying it right. “What I mean is, you look- You don’t look like Adrien Agreste today. You look… normal; like a run-down college student.”

“Oh,” the boy sighed, letting his normally perfect posture slump as he rested his head in his hand, elbow on the table. “And here I thought I had everyone fooled,” he said with a sad smile.

“Hey, you probably do,” Marinette said with a kind smile, this time leaning closer to him. “I just know you’re been going through a lot, and this whole Volpina thing isn’t helping,” she added quieter.

“I’ll be okay, Mari. Chat and Ladybug perform this weekend. I guess for Volpina I’ll be the prize they compete for,” Adrien muttered.

“You know Ladybug would never think like that. Chat Noir either,” Marinette told him, reaching to his elbow.

“I guess you’re right,” he said, watching her hand wrap around his arm in comfort. He looked up at her, and it was clear this was the first time he was seeing her properly. “Did you, um,” Adrien struggled not to laugh at her. “Did you get dressed in a hurry?” he asked.

“Oh god,” Marinette pulled away from him again, hurriedly tugging her hood down to inspect it. She saw the polka dotted sock hanging from the collar and cringed as she shoved it into her dance bag.

“I woke up late,” she sighed after a moment, running her fingers through her hair, wincing at the tangles before giving up and twisting it into a bun, hoping that there would be enough strength to hold it there without a clip. It fell to her shoulders, of course and Marinette let out a small grumble about impossible hair

“I might be able to help with that,” Adrien said after it was clear her hair wouldn’t hold. He fiddled with his bag and pulled out a comb before offering to her. Marinette took it hesitantly but smiled, tugging her hair out and beginning to comb it. The boy just watched, almost mesmerised until Marinette handed his comb back, feeling more than a little self-conscious.

“Everything okay?”

“Y-yeah,” it could have been the light but Marinette thought she saw his cheeks turn a little pink. “You just… You look nice with your hair down,” he stammered and Marinette knew her face was turning tomato red.

“You two have some explaining to do.”

The voice broke Marinette and Adrien’s moment, both of them looking up to see Alya, the girl almost fuming and Nino awkwardly standing behind her as people turned to look.

“Uh oh,” Marinette muttered.

“Uh oh is right, missy,” Alya said harshly as Nino ushered Adrien to the side. “What is this? Did you skip class? Were you two on a date?” Alya almost squealed and Marinette slapped her hands over her friends mouth, laughing nervously when the boys looked back at them.

“Oh my god, keep your voice down,” Marinette hissed. “This was not a date. It was-”

“Did he pay for the coffee?” Alya asked, eyebrow raised.

“No, we went halves, but Alya, that’s not-”

“Seriously, Agreste? This girl asks you for coffee and you make her pay for her own drink?” Alya said, raising her voice again as she turned to the blonde boy.

“Oh my god, Alya, stop! Shut up!” Marinette almost shouted, her cheeks flush, her heart now pounding with embarrassment.

“It’s not like that,” Adrien replied quietly. “I offered, she said no… is that… should I have…?” the confusion on the boy’s face was so innocent Marinette shook her head.

“No, Adrien, don’t listen to her. I appreciate that you offered, but it was my idea for coffee,” she said quickly, not wanting him to feel bad again. “It was only fair. Plus, I did offer to buy yours too, and if we hadn’t compromised, we never would have even had coffee,” she added with a smile that seemed to reassure him.

“Now, if you’ll excuse me,” Marinette said politely, turning to Alya, fury in her eyes as she grabbed her bag and Alya’s arm, dragging both out the door of the café and around to the back of the building. It had started raining at some point, but Mari didn’t mind, at least not yet.

“Look, I was late because I had a bad night last night, and when I got here, Adrien was late and he seemed so upset. I just had to try and cheer him up… and it worked, he’s not so glum anymore.”

“What happened last night?” Alya said after a moment, pulling her umbrella from her bag.

“Well, I got home from Adrien’s and-”

“Back up! You were with Adrien yesterday?” Alya’s eyes were wide.

“Well, yeah I went to surprise him. He said he was bored and stuck with homework so I went over to keep him company,” Marinette glossed over the details of their study, talking briefly about his comments on her project and how that boy was really obsessed with anime.

“Alya?” The girl had pulled out her phone a few seconds before and was now frozen staring at the screen, umbrella tipping to the side.

“M-mari… The Ladyblog was hacked,” Alya said quietly.

“What!?” Marinette took the umbrella from Alya, covering them both as she saw the post.

"This was posted to the Ladyblog this morning." Alya muttered as she tapped on the picture. It was a photo of her design for Ladybug's dress, the image clear as if someone had held her notebook when taking the photo. Marinette felt her stomach churn and knot itself. She had only finished that sketch two days ago.

"H-h-how? How did they get this? How did it get on the blog? You are the owner of the blog, only you can approve posts, Alya!" Marinette's voice began to rise in panic.

"Someone got in, they must have someone found out my password," Alya sounded on the verge of tears. "Ladybug is never going to trust me again,” Alya said after a moment, her hand hands dropping to her sides, her phone slipping into a puddle.

“She's going to think I did this," Alya heaved a huge sob and Marinette put her hand on her friend's shoulder after picking up the phone and wiping it off.

"Ladybug will understand, trust me," Marinette rubbed her thumb into her friend’s shoulder trying to soothe her as she struggled to contain her panic. Someone had gotten their hands on her design book and been looking for it. Someone who knew she was designing for the competitions. Someone who needed something for Volpina…

Marinette felt herself seethe as she caught a flash of red hair pass the alley they were standing.

"I'll see you in class," Marinette managed to get out before storming off in the direction the hair had gone.

~~~~~~

“Whoa, babe, what’s wrong?” Nino asked as Alya shuffled back into the café, her umbrella open and trailing behind her, tears streaming down her face and her phone clutched in her fist.

“Alya?” Adrien stood and helped close the umbrella while Nino lead his girlfriend to the booth. “Where’s Marinette?”

Neither Nino nor Alya seemed concerned with the girl’s whereabouts in that moment, only the image on Alya’s phone. Adrien took the phone gently from her hand and looked at it.

It was a beautiful design of a red and black ballroom dancing gown, no doubt Ladybug’s dress for the tango competition. Adrien saw the signature in the bottom fabric of the dress and felt anger surge through him as he saw the intricate MDC signed like in every other page of Mari’s book. Someone had access to Marinette’s design book, something she held so precious to her.

The caption beneath the image read:

A bug can’t change their spots, and with a dress like this, it’s no wonder they won’t make it far this weekend. Looks like Madame Bustier doesn’t know much about fashion or dancing. The secrets out, Ladybug. Now everyone knows how disappointing you truly are.

Adrien had to pass the phone back before he threw it across the room. Once he had calmed himself, he realized what Alya was so upset about.

“Ladybug is never going to trust me again,” the girl sobbed.

“Babe, Ladybug trusts you. She knows you would never do this. She’ll understand,” Nino reassured, his arm around her shoulders. The boy looked to Adrien and he stuttered.

“Y-yeah, Alya. Nino’s right. I know Ladybug,” Adrien said, sitting across from them and reaching out to Alya’s hand clutched around her phone. “If there is one thing I know, it’s that Ladybug will not hate you.”

The girl’s brown eyes looked up at him, her glasses slightly fogged; but he could see she knew he meant it. After all, she knew he was Chat Noir, and no one knew Ladybug like Chat Noir. She nodded slowly and calmed herself before gasping.

“Mari! Oh god, I just left her, she’s gonna hate me!” It was as if Nino and Alya had only just noticed her absence. “It’s her design, I’m so stupid. She’s probably devastated! I have to go find her,” Alya said, struggling to get up with Nino blocking her in.

“Alya, she is a big girl. She’ll be ok-”

“Marinette!” Alya cried, clambering over her boyfriend to go to her friend who had just re-entered the café, looking tired and deflated. “Mari, I’m so sorry! I didn’t even think about how you would be feeling about this!” Adrien could hear the hiccup in her voice and shot Nino a look but he was already up and leading Alya back to the table as tears sprang from her eyes again.

“It’s okay Alya, it’s not your fault,” Marinette said with a small smile as she followed them to the table. Adrien could see something else in her eyes though. Disappointment, maybe?

“Hey, are you okay, Marinette?” Adrien asked as the dark-haired girl slid in beside him, her hair damp and sticking to her face.

“As okay as I can be,” the girl sighed, resting her head on the table in defeat.

“Where did you go?” Nino asked as Alya sniffed beside him.

“I… I needed a moment, and then I thought I saw Dessinatuer but it was some other kid with similar hair.” The girl groaned.

“You remember his hair?” Adrien asked in surprise. “Do you remember anything else about him?”

“Vaguely,” Marinette replied after a moment, pulling her face from the table. “I mean, I met him one night at the club with Chat Noir… How do you know about Dessinatuer?” she asked after a moment and Adrien froze. Was he not supposed to know?

“He’s friends with Chat Noir and Ladybug, remember?” Alya chimed in quickly, her voice surprisingly level. “Plus, he follows the Ladyblog. It’s no surprise.” Adrien shot her a grateful look.

“Oh, right,” Marinette sighed before her phone beeped. “Ah crap. We are gonna be late for dance class, c’mon guys.”

“Are you girls sure you’re okay for class? I mean, we don’t know who or where Volpina and her assistant are,” Nino said, standing and stopping the girls from rising.

“Nino, I appreciate your concern, but if Ladybug and Chat Noir aren’t backing down, we can’t either.” Adrien swore Marinette’s eyes shot to him as she spoke.

“Okay, fine. But if you don’t feel it, don’t dance,” the boy insisted and Alya pushed his glasses back up his nose.

“Thank you for your concern babe, but we can take care of ourselves.”

Adrien swore he heard Nino mutter something along the lines of ‘sometimes I wonder’, but it was lost in the noise of people getting their last orders before rushing off to class.

The girls picked up their bags and Adrien and Nino followed suit, only as they filed out of the café, Adrien found himself in step with Alya, Nino and Marinette behind them. The rain had stopped, but the dark clouds were threatening more to come.

“This is so not good,” Alya said quietly to him. “Do you think Ladybug knows?”

“I wouldn’t be surprised, but you know she would never blame you for this,” Adrien reassured.

“Volpina is causing more and more trouble though, what are we going to do?”

“We don’t do anything. We leave it for Ladybug and Chat Noir. We look out for each other but at the end of the day, Volpina has her reasons for going after Ladybug, and only they can stop it.”

“I wonder why she chose Ladybug,” Alya wondered aloud, and Adrien bit his lip. Even if he had decided to tell Alya, now was not the right time.

Adrien held the door open to the room for Alya and let Nino and Marinette follow; but before they entered the class properly, Adrien grabbed Marinette’s hand.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” he asked, eyes boring into hers.

“Yeah, I’m just annoyed. Someone got to my sketchbook, someone I trust. I feel betrayed… but honestly, I’m a bit more concerned about Ladybug’s costume now,” she added with a smile, though whether it was real or not, Adrien wasn’t sure.

“Okay, well, you can always come over and watch anime if you feel like you need some inspiration or something. I’ve got a ton you can choose from,” he added with a smile as they walked into class together and Marinette laughed in reply but it was drowned out by a shriek.

“Adrikins! What are you doing with her!?” Chloe screeched.

Confused, Adrien took a moment to realize he still hadn’t let go of Marinette’s hand. He loosened his grip, but it was Marinette who pulled away, her cheeks red as she tried to slink away to get changed.

“Stay away from him! Everyone knows you only cause bad luck; I mean, look at poor Ladybug’s reputation! And that hideous costume you designed for her! I wouldn’t be surprised if Ladybug dropped you and squashed you like you deserve,” Chloe continued.

“Chloe, enough!” Adrien snapped. “She’s having a tough time as it is. There is a reason Ladybug is her friend and not yours. You need to stop being so rude,” Adrien frowned, and Chloe’s mouth fell open.

“How dare you! I’ll have you know Ladybug and I are extremely good friends! We’ve hung out multiple times, and I have the selfies to prove it,” she boasted.

“Are you two close enough to know Ladybug’s identity?” A new voice asked. Lila had helped Marinette escape to the change rooms and had come back to taunt the blonde.

“Not even that stupid alley cat she hangs around with knows. Ladybug is smarter than that,” Chloe tried to defend herself.

“So you don’t know, then?”

“Of course not. Do you?” Chloe was fuming now.

“Well we have been friends for, like, ever; so yeah,” Lila smirked. “I’m the reason Ladybug even exists.”

“Is there an issue?” Madame Bustier’s voice echoed through the hall. All the students looked up surprised at the red-haired woman who rarely raised her voice.

“No, Madame; I don’t have an issue at all,” Lila responded innocently.

“Mademoiselle Bourgeois?”

Chloe was silent for a moment, still visibly fuming. “N-No Madame.”

“Good, now partner up and let’s get ready for today’s lesson,” Madame Bustier instructed and all the students were silent as they followed up. Adrien almost speechless at what had started, but his hand was still warm from Marinette’s.

Shaking his head, he hurried to change and begin the lesson.

#miraculous ladybug #fanfic #ml fanfic #ladybug #chat noir #Marinette Dupain-Cheng #adrien agreste #ballroom au #dance au #aged au #royalty au #Nino lahiffe #alya cesaire #nathaniel kurtzberg #chloe bourgeois #lila rossi #ao3

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chill-that-ur-inmyhead · 4 years

Text

stand by me

1 - Are you one of those people who can watch TV shows and movies over and over again without getting bored? yes!!! I prefer to water my favs over trying something new, I’d really have to be interested to watch something else

2 - If you drink coffee, do you like it plain or would you rather have something like a latte or something flavoured? latte for sure, preferably a matcha latte (from pret :))))))

3 - How did you used to dress ten years ago? Do you dress in a similar way now? so aged 11, a lot of stretchy jean jeggings and colourful tops, no elaborate accessorising, very simple and basic and most importantly comfortable

4 - When you’re grocery shopping, do you buy known brands or are you happy to go with the generic store version? I can go both ways

5 - Do you have a close relationship with any of your cousins? not really

6 - Who was the last person to sleep over at your house? Does this person stay over often or was it more of a one-off? I had a one night stand last year

7 - Does bad weather put you off going out if you’ve got plans to do so? Have you ever cancelled plans due to the weather? depends if the plans are spent outside but if we are going to a bar or restaurant then the weather wouldn’t stop me

8 - When you’re on vacation, do you prefer doing the typical tourist things, or would you rather explore somewhere off the beaten track? typical tourist things but once they’re done I could go off the beaten track

9 - Did your family travel a lot when you were younger? we went to places around Europe but never outside of it

10 - When was the last time you went shopping for clothes? Did you get anything decent or find any bargains? shopping online for clothes, literally had a delivery yesterday, I needed a raincoat

11 - Is it true that accessories can make or break an outfit? for sure, I wish 11 year old me knew a bit more about accessorising!!

12 - What is your worst memory from high school? What about the best? worst memories were probs fighting with my friends, it was an awful stressful feeling but the best memories is laughing around with those same friends!

13 - Is there any trait in a potential partner that would be a total deal breaker for you? different sense of humour probably

14 - Do you insist people use coasters if they’re putting drinks down in your house? nope but I think they do automatically

15 - Have you ever been arrested? Were you guilty of whatever it is you were arrested for? nope never

16 - Name five items on the shelf nearest to you: vinyl player, ben e king record, camera, camera bag, passport

17 - After meals, do you wash dishes up right away, or do you leave them in the sink and do a whole days worth at once? leave them on the side for the dishwasher

18 - What websites do you find yourself spending the most time on? recently, netflix, asos, twitter, tumblr, redit, insta,

19 - Do you still download music and TV shows? sure if I’m going on a long journey I download them to listen to offline

20 - Does your phone have a good battery life? How long does it last before you need to charge it again? depending how much I use it but I can usually get through the whole day before I charge it at night

21 - When was the last time you hit snooze? this morning

22 - Did you ever play The Sims? Which expansion pack was your favourite, if you had any? I used to play Sims castaway but it was ages ago

23 - Are there any popular film series or TV shows that you just don’t get the appeal of? cooking shows, I find them quite boring and they make me hungry!

24 - As a child, did you receive pocket money or an allowance? How much did you get? Was it dependent on you doing chores of some kind? yes I think it was £10 a week or something, nope no chores I guess I was lucky

25 - Do you think your parents did a good job of raising you? Would you do anything differently with your own kids? I’d try and go outside of europe for holidays, but I guess that will depend on my finances and what my children are up for

26 - If something is bothering you, do you have to fix it right away? my brother is talking to his friend and its really annoyingly loud

27 - Are there any household jobs you enjoy doing? If so, what’s the reason that you enjoy those things? hoovering my room and seeing my floor become cleaner

28 - Do you still live in the area you grew up in? Would you like to live somewhere else one day? Where would you go? I had to move back home after uni but I really want to go back to London once everything resumes

29 - Do you smoke, drink or do drugs? How old were you the first time you tried those things? Do you want to quit? drinking happened at 15/ 16 and marijuana at 17

30 - What’s one thing that really grosses you out? Is it something you have to deal with anyway? How do you cope? hair in the shower drain GROSS or I guess anything in the shower drain just grosses me out

31 - Have you ever grown your own fruits or veggies? Did it work out okay or was it a bit of a failure? my padre does! tomatoes and blueberries, used to grow raspberries

32 - Could you ever raise animals only to kill and eat them later on, or would you struggle to kill a living thing you’d formed an attachment to? If it is my last resort you gotta do what you gotta do

33 - When was the last time you painted your nails? I got my nails done just before lockdown happened last week

34 - If you regularly sit in the same place (on your bed or the sofa, for example) do you have a cupboard or something to keep supplies in so you don’t have to keep moving all the time? I have a snack tin next to me and a jug of water, been thinking about moving my spare kettle into my room to make teas instead of having to go downstairs but that would be the height of my laziness

35 - Have you ever been a witness to a crime? Did you have to make a statement to the police? nope

36 - Do you prefer Harry Potter or the Lord of the Rings? Harry Potter ofc

37 - Do you like to air your house or room out every day to stop it getting musty? in the summer yes

38 - Have you ever visited a landmark or place made famous by a TV show or film? Did you go there because it was featured on TV? not yet but I want to

39 - Who taught you how to tie your shoe laces? parents

40 - Do you have any pets? What are they all doing at the moment? I don’t but wished I did

41 - Do you prefer sweet or savoury snacks? sweet

42 - What’s the most painful place you’ve ever had a spot? Was it a big relief when you finally managed to squeeze it? forehead spots can hurt like a bitch

43 - Talking of spots, have you ever watched videos like those by Dr Pimple Popper? Do you think that kind of stuff is cool or gross?

44 - When was the last time you attended a bonfire? literally last week, dad had a bonfire for 5th November to remember his mother

45 - Is there anything you wish you enjoyed, but you just struggle with for some reason? Maybe you hate the crowds or the noise? I wish I liked running

46 - What’s worse - someone constantly blowing their nose or someone who’s constantly sniffing? sniffing

47 - Do you have any genuine phobias? What are they and have you ever done anything to address them? nope

48 - Do you hate the feeling of being sweaty and dirty from exercise? Is this something that’s put you off working out in the past? I don’t like that it makes my hair gross and that sometimes prevents me from working out

49 - Is there anything “normal” that you have a real aversion to? Like a certain noise or smell or taste? I’m not fond of fireworks, high risk low reward imo

50 - If you’ve made plans with someone and you really don’t want to go when the time comes, do you suck it up or make an excuse? I usually don’t make plans that I don’t wanna go to, I’ll make plans that I can be excited for

51 - What’s your favourite thing to do with each of your parents? Do you get a chance to do that regularly? Used to go for lunch with my mum most weekends but that doesn’t happen anymore

52 - If you were to adopt a pet, is there anything that would put you off, like a certain colour or breed? If I was to adapt a dog it would be a golden retriever otherwise I just wouldn’t get a dog, for a cat I’m less picky, just no completely white cats and no hairless ones.

53 - Would you ever like to give circus skills a go? What would you be most interested in trying? trampolining looks like fun

54 - What are your thoughts on circuses that allow animal performances? shame shame I know your name

55 - Are there any habits or traditions you’ve picked up from your parents what you’ve carried on in your own home? I don’t have my own home yet but I’m sure I will

56 - Are there any remakes that you think are better than the originals? the shrek series and Ice series are strong contenders

57 - How about cover songs? Do you prefer any of those to the original versions? I used to only listen to the glee version of songs, it was so weird hearing the original

58 - What’s the first movie you remember seeing in the cinema? What about the last? HSM 3 when I was 9 and Pixie at 21

59 - Do you listen to more music, or watch more TV? Is this something that’s changed over the years? over lockdown I’ve been really into blasting my music but before then I deffo wated more tv

60 - Do you have any weird fears or worries? Like thinking you’ve forgotten to lock a door or blow out a candle? What do you do to reassure yourself you’ve not forgotten? whenever I go somewhere I have to triple check I’ve not left anything - it almost happened to me a couple of weeks ago with my purse and thank god I triple check because I saw it and thought that would have been hell for parallel universe me

#14/11/20

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toomanyskeletons · 7 years

Note

do all the oc asks ALL of them for AT LEAST two of your ocs (evil laughter)

“evil”

you act as if talking extensively about my ocs does not bring me joy (i’ll only do two probably bc i do have some asks from other people so i’ll have to do those with other ocs, and i’ll try to stick to the same two for the most part.

or three. maybe three.)

anyway let’s begin

1. if they had a tumblr, what would they post about?

Sam: hmm i think probably some blog like. Mostly trans positivity posts with scattered posts abt how much she loves her gf

Amelia: considering her popularity status she’d run some blog like. U kno the blogs tumblr celebrities run i guess? So like. Reblogging a few general funny posts and answering select asks while getting like 200 every day.

2. what’s their favourite colour?

Sam: she likes blue :o like. Light blues. Also she keeps her hair dyed light blue as well

Amelia: purple. Honestly idk much more i can say about this.

3. What makes them laugh?

Sam: shitty puns and memes, mostly. The type of person who laughs out loud when u just say ‘egg’. She’s probably still into ‘xD tacos’ random humour.

Amelia: the polar opposite of sam in this regard. Laughs at intellectual humor. Like. rich fancy people. I know it exists but i cant think of any specific examples. Politely laughs at things people say are funny but she does not find them actually funny.

4. If they had one day left to live, how would they spend it?

Sam: “lmao dw i’ll probably just go to hell anyway” wait no context is important. She’s like. Actually how do i make this not sound bad rip. Uh. basically she is a business partner of lucifer who is actually p chill but that’s another story

Anyway that means like. If she dies she’ll probably just come back as a ghost or a higher tier demon.

O fuk now i really wanna draw that

Amelia: panicking and trying to find a way to not die. She had things she wants to do and a public record to maintain and jeez i just realised how much ames has changed compared the the first universe she was in. i mean YEAH completely different life experiences but rip

5. Do they have any annoying habits?

-this is really subjective bc of what different people consider annoying but

Sam: people say she laughs too much. That is not her annoying habit is, her annoying habit is tellling lucifer when people say that so lucifer can like. Ban them from reincarnation or put a curse on them or something like that. Also sometimes when she cant be bothered to go that extra step she might go into the past and become that person’s grandmother.

...that second one isnt really an annoying habit to most people but to the one guy who has to help keep control of time, it is a very annoying habit and what makes up like half of his job doings.

Amelia: sometimes goes very over the top with things. One time she stole a magic book by becoming a security guard at the place where it was kept and then took the book and ran. So like, instead of doing things illegally, she did it also illegally and got a month’s pay from it as well.

I guess she’s like. Extra™

6. What’s their favourite movie genre?

I s2fg i have mentioned this sometime in one of the long texts i have written involving these characters but i cant remember so

Sam: tbh probably more realistic/contemporary stuff, rom-coms, slice of life, coming of age etc. Like. her life is a science fiction/fantasy movie she’s a time traveler working with the dark lord lucifer ffs. Also she’d probably get annoyed on tiny details while watching historical stuff like

“That never happened”

“Sam it’s fiction, it’s a movie, how would they have known that”

“Well maybe they didn’t know it but it’s still fucking annoying”

Amelia: probably similar to sam, her life is fuckin busy and always people and she’s famous so like. Escape from her life is to indulge in the normal things.

Just as a side note this does take place in a modern-ish fantasy world so idk what fantasy movies would be considered there but. They exist. I’ll work this out sooner or later

Also bonus character bc its fucking funny - Zeph: zephyr likes horror movies. She also likes to watch horror movies with her brother. Her brother does not share her same passion for horror movies. He has a certain threshold before he has to flee the room and cuddle someone. This is mostly why zeph likes horror movies. She is pretty picky with what she considers ‘good’ and spends most of her time making fun of horror movies.

And, like the rest of us, secretly freaks out when she is alone at night and hears a sound outside. But for significantly less long because she knows exactly how to make fun of it.

7. What are their religious beliefs?

Alright i might not (read: will not currently) answer this bc i’m still working out how to handle religion in this, bc basically there is historical evidence for how the world was created. But obviously that’s not the only component to religion?

Another point would be that actually i still havent got around to creating any religions yet.i still gotta get around to getting down a more detailed history of the world first but i am planning it

8. What’s their current job (if they have one)?

Yes BITCH i have been WAITIGN for a question like this

Sam: basically she made a deal with lucifer and runs many errands for them. But also they helped her a LOT when they helped her escape a shitty transphobic environment and also the two became best friends? So i mean she doesn’t get paid but that takes up a lot of her time

Also she, at one stage, becomes part of this thing called the council which i haven’t quite worked out how they work in this universe yet. Theyre a bunch of strong magic people who work in coordination with the Champion (more on this below) to put down rules about magic. Theyre a reused concept from this story i made when i was like. 10. So the idea does need some reworking.

Amelia: amelia is the champion, which is basically the title given to the person who wins at a big magic competition. Its a p big job, lots of publicity and pr and often regretted by the people who do end up getting there

(like? This one guy? He was kinda like “oh yeah sounds fun” and then he fucking won and he was like “lmao i’ll lose next year” and then he kept the position for 7 years and after that got so fucking sick of it he faked his assassination and became a reclusive mysterious millionaire)

Anyway she enjoys it for the first while until there is a real threat of her being assassinated unlike the aforementioned dude

But she enjoys being around people to an extent, and like. She enjoys making people happy, so

9. How do they react to confrontation?

Sam: similar way to what i described before. Like. jsut the little things. Cursing them with the help of lucifer, becoming their grandmother, you know. The usual ways people deal with confrontation.

Amelia: curiosity, further questioning, keeping calm, kinda just. Being chill about it. She wants to make herself a better person, in general, and if someone is deliberately being a confrontational asshole she prefers to just state her point calmly.

10. Do they have a criminal record?

Sam: you know? Probably? She kills a bunch of assholes where it’s required, but also she legally doesn’t exist? So? Idk? She’s been arrested a few times, but considering there is no information on her existence at all-

*shrugs* idfk how the law works.

Amelia: well, technically, no, she only did illegal things last universe and had a pretty fancy upbringing this universe, so there was no reason for her to do the illegals and also like. Public image and stuff. She worries a lot about public image.

11. What’s their favourite plant?

Another thing which i feel i have mentioned somewhere but idfk where

Sam: likes hydrangeas. They’re pretty.

Amelia: can i just say. It is definitely not catnip. Actually. Maybe? Like. she had some pretty fuckin negative experiences with catnip where she destroyed reality for like a solid five seconds by accident and went to purgatory, but also she made two life friends out of it, so? Maybe catnip after all.

12. Can they play any instruments?

Sam: “does the kazoo count”

Amelia: nope

But because this was boring, i’m going to do a special guest feature from her half brother ryan who is a semi-popular youtube vlogger/musician-y dude. or . whatever this world’s equivalent of youtube is. Uh. metube. Yotube. I’ll think about it.

Ryan: he plays the guitar and sings and he’s damn fucking good at it and he knows it. Also he shares the same combination of forgetting how to outlet his anger in healthy ways + poor impulse control which means that about once every six months he has to buy a new guitar because he couldn’t get that song right and he hit the guitar against the floor.

(his dad is a writer and also an archangel,and one time he couldn’t work out how to start off a scene right so he exploded his laptop and had to use a typewriter for the four weeks while his other archangel buddy was fixing it - i’m getting off topic here)

13. What are they proudest of?

Sam: i guess just. Her life in general? Like. she’s survived up to this point, she’s doin shit, maybe not the shit she expected to be doing or the shit she imagined she’d be doing but she’s still doin it. Like. fuck you life. I survived. And she’s proud of that.

Amelia: that one time when she managed to keep her champion title the first time? And also when she made friends with the guy who she thought was a girl and also dead who turned out to be not a girl and alive and also was the champion for seven years rememebr that guy yeah that’s this guy. Anyway she made friends with him after settling some differences. And also when she stopped a whole organisation from murdering her yeah that was good too.

14. What’s their biggest insecurity?

Sam: okay this is Definitely Not Me Projecting here (hint: it’s me projecting) but she hates being seen as masculine at all and is very insecure when people refer to her or see her as masculine? Like if u call her butch She Will Cry and also why would you do that bc her and her girlfriend are femme as heck

Amelia: public image public image public image public image

Like. she doesn’t want to look bad, or like a bad public leader, but also, she just wants to do her own thing, u kno?

15. What do they most often dream about?

Like. literally dream or daydream?

Sam: probably. Mostly happy stuff. Plus random occasional vivid recollections of tramatic experiences.

Amelia: honestly who the fuck knows (i’d answer this properly but I am Almost Out O f Time)

So yes almost out of time but thank you so much and doing this has inspired me to just completely rework my first book to make it more interesting

I know that sounds bad btu its not i promise i love oyu

(also there was a bunch of different formatting like italcs etc that was lost when icopied from here to docs sorry)

#my writing #my ocs #violetmanicwave

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