#It actually changed my whole music taste wtf

[gunnrblze]

The Ghost Boys as Deftones songs (+ my oc Strike)

Hesh- Cherry Waves (bc it sounds like him) & Headup (also cause it sounds like him, and for the lyrics. I couldn’t choose just one and there’s like four others I want to give him cause he’s very deftones to me)

Logan- Sextape (“take me one last time, take me for one last ride. I’m out of my head, tonight” Fed Logan, hnnshjdks I’m crying! this whole song) also honorable mention; their ‘Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want’ cover

Elias- Change (In the House of Flies) (yes actually. it’s giving him and Rorke, “I watched you change, into a fly. I looked away, you were on fire, and I watched a change in you” etc etc. also this song is attractive, you see where I’m going…)

Merrick- Kimdracula (love this song, save this fuckin man cause he’s been through it actually) & Hole in the Earth (can’t pick, love this album he is Saturday Night Wrist actually, lyrics are very him. i 🩶 Merrick)

Keegan- Be Quiet and Drive (Far Away) (“I don’t care where, just far, so far away. away so far” this man is tired okay, save him. also…be quiet and drive…cause he’s quiet and bad at-okay) & Risk (another honorable mention cause I’m indecisive and love their music. him ‘n Ajax vibes!)

Kick- Entombed (“from the day you arrived I’ve remained by your side, in chains, entombed” one of the final ghosts left…I’m WEEPING. one of my fav deftones song eva, he’s very Koi No Yokan to me) & Dai the Flu (because I said so)

Rorke- Beware (“do you like the way the water tastes? It’s like gunfire. You knew but you could never say” deceased! HELLO Caracas, wtf. this man needs a break, yes he’s the villain, someone kiss him on the forehead anyways)

Strike- Diamond Eyes (my precious pookie wookie angel…no explanation he’s just woven into the fabric of my mind and it makes sense. also a deftones listener like half of these mfs probably)

Can you tell this one means a lot to me lmfao

[moononmyfloor]

In the 1st Quarter of 2024 Cdramaland...

2nd Quarter, 3rd Quarter, 4th Quarter

1. The Hope

Nothing can be better than a Zhang Ruoyun drama to start the year with. One of the best High School shows I've seen in the recent years, it had an amazing balance of explosive emotions of youth and jaded realism. It would appeal to viewers of all age ranges and I felt so so much nostalgia and relatability from beginning to the end. It was funny, it was smart, it was beautifully acted down to every minor role. (I pretend that last 30 minutes didn't happen, though)

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2. Wang Qiang (as Li Ran from The Hope), Zheng Hehuizi as Yang Caiwei from In Blossom)

LOOK at that babie😭🥺. Don't you want to pinch his cheeks? One of the most darling characters I had pleasure of watching recently, I wish a bright, bright future career for Wang Qiang. He portrayed the classic outwardly-prickly, marshmallow-inside teenager archetype with amazing nuance.

And Yang Caiwei oh Yang Caiwei.... as one of the shows and characters that created quite the buzz recently, I don't have anything more to add to the discussion. I can only say: lady, thank you for taking up a role that is FINALLY convincingly scarred, unkempt, dirty and not strikingly goddess-y from the first glance, and playing her with such gusto the true, genuine beauty of the character was drawn out with no external effort at all.

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3. The Hope

This drama utilized music so beautifully than 99% idol romance dramas ever would. Atmospheric music that elevated the scenes with lyrics that fit, not to mention writing three whole songs to be FULLY performed in-drama for character purposes. It felt like a musical at times. Talk about dedication.

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4. Pan Yue's, from In Blossom, Legend of Shen Li (Only few)

I mean

How many costume drama wardrobes can top these embroidery and visibly high quality fabric? Not to mention they actually look wearable in daily life, and not just ornate for "main character's costumes" reasons. They are actually quite simple, if you think a bit- but immensely tasteful. AND

My FAVORITE thing about not just his, but all costumes in this show that I've rarely seen other dramas do is: They repeated the costumes! Many times! Almost all of them! And that added so much to the groundedness of the character. Rich young master having a runway-worthy wardrobe? Nothing new. Him wearing them again and again because that's what a normal, reasonable person does? I'm sold.

I loved the plain but in an elegant and carefree way styling of the two leads of Shen Li whenever they were having recluse times. *This* is exactly how I imagine immortals too- just vibing and not decked in gold from head-to-toe because they are simply beyond it. Whenever the show changed to the typical bejewelled guzhuang garb in heaven scenes, it immeadietely visually reduced the show to just another xianxia. First Till the End of the Moon and now this😭. Guys, pick a consistent style and rock it proudly! A signature look is very important especially if you are aiming to create an impactful all-powerful character! I see no reason the gods couldn't do all the grand court and fight scenes in these robes either, honestly that would've served drive home the nail that the gods function on a different wavelength than humans.

(Also Wtf was even that Shen Li in a Greek goddess like getup? [last image] Not that it's not pretty BUT *waves hands around helplessly..)

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5. In Blossom, Legend of Shen Li, The Hope, Baking Challenge

In Blossom posters had a perfect balance of traditional Chinese ethereal elegance mixed with gothic horror mystery vibes.

I LOVED the "how I imagine the peaceful cottagecore fairytale like life of my great-grandparents" vibe of Shen Li posters. It's giving lore.

Really liked the "hooligan teens on retro album cover" aesthetic of The Hope posters too.

The whimsical food posters of Baking Challenge were also fun.

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6. Detective Chinatown 2

I didn't even know a Detective Chinatown S2 was even coming like...until it did and it was like a second new year because I LOVED that show and it was the most unexpected pleasant surprise of the year- especially when almost all the main cast members were returning. And the first few eps were amazing too and didn't do a disservice at all to the previous season and I got my hopes up thinking we'll get to see a continuation of the Roy Chiu-Janine Chang arc too... only for the show to pull the rug and did the exact same thing as the previous season- the main character withdrew from the story by midpoint. Oh my gods. I want to find this show's creators and give them a good shake. Have some Janine jiejie pics from first season though just for the nostalgia's sake.

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7. Baking Challenge

If you aren't deterred by barely-legible machine subs, give this one a try. It's a fun little food drama that doesn't take itself seriously yet has a lot of heart. And for The Untamed fans, there's our Lan Sizhui (Zheng Fanxing) in it, and he's still the same cutie pie!

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8. Pegasus

I watched five episodes, it's a solid show, fun too, it's just that I'm not very into racing AND Hu Xianxu is still a baby in my head😭😂 To convince me that he's a rich CEO with his own romance and adult problems will take at least 20 more years!

I see him parading like this and couldn't help but want to laugh hysterically lol. IT'S NOT HIS FAULT. He's an amazing actor! But still..

I hope he doesn't try to force-rush his shift to adult characters, either.

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More posts by me

[youchangedmedestiel]

New to the SPN fandom

Well, not so new because I started watching SPN on December 15th 2022 and finished the whole show on February 20th 2023. And I started to ship Destiel on December 31st 2022 (What a way to enter a new year, I didn't know how much back then) between episodes 4x10 and 4x22, so something must have happened between these two episodes for me to ship them or maybe it was just the crazy eye thing they do. Who knows? I don't remember. Anyway, I didn't knoooow ANYTHING at the time (What a time). I didn't know how crazy it would be to ship them, how much it would impact my life.

I mean I watched the whole show in 2 months because of them. I even occasionally watch a random episode... or ten.

I watched a crazy amount of edit videos on Youtube, another crazy amount of conventions videos.

I discovered Cockles along the way, because Destiel was too painful, I needed relieve which led to me smiling stupid at my screen a lot while watching Jensen and Misha on a stage.

I red fanfiction for the first time in my life, and still have a lot to read.

For the first time too, I even wrote fanfiction (I have not decided if I will post what I wrote one day yet, for now I'm just sending it to a friend who made me watch the show, because it's her fault). I mean WTF. I always hated writing in English at school (I'm french and I doesn't even write in French, I have never write in my life except when I had to). What the actual fuck!

I discovered Jensen sang and that was a damn good discovery. That voice, I will never be over it (such as Destiel I guess).

I have a playlist for Radio company songs, I have another with songs from the show and I have a Led Zepp one (which I'm actually listening while I wrote this). This insane... thing/show/ship/whatever has even influenced my musical taste. HOW?

I used to draw a long time ago (mostly animals) but WHO KNOWS maybe one day I will draw Destiel since it has changed a LOT of things in my life.

I decided to stop fight it anyway and just embraced it, so here I am.

[vitaminwaterreviews]

S.E.S. - Sea & Eugene & Shoo

Yeah, I wasn’t sure what to expect, but I guess this is what I should’ve expected. It’s very 1st gen, slow jams and decent dance-pop. Dreams Come True really is that song, the rest just doesn’t hold up. That said, this first half was much better than the second half, there were some good songs in there. It is crazy though how much they sound like they do in Remember, despite the 20 year difference. Average score of 7.2 which feels maybe a bit high but oh well.

This is just notes, so I’m not gonna type anything fancy about the whole project. I’ve got another doc with other notes, and I’ll end up writing a proper post at some point, too. If you happen to be reading this, thanks for scrolling this far!

I think it’s very fitting that this is the last album I get around to. For a while, the only 1st gen song that I knew was Dreams Come True. So let’s end this whole project with the associated album.

Shy Boy

Okay, this beat is doing some cool stuff here

Haha the bass is a bit fuzzy

OMG is it unnamed male rapper time??

And now we’re synthy and hype

Haha Jesus Bada chill out

Like, a single rap line

Nmixx change up

This rap sounds familiar

Nmixx change up

And now we’re back here

What? It just ends there?

8/10, definitely a vibe but I’m kinda confused

Dreams Come True

Currently #14 on my Favorites playlist, but that might be a bit high

Oh this does have a music video doesn’t it? Let’s see

S P A C E

That is exactly what the song sounds like tbf

Oh wow this song has Choreo, alright then

10/10, gorgeous

Snow, X-Mas

Synth

Bass

Here we are, here are the christmas bells

The beat does Not match the bells at all haha

Lol WHAT the “aye aye aye aye” part wtf

The screams I stg

Needs more bells

…No, I didn’t say it needs more slap bass, I said it needs more bells

Yeah there we go

Slow it down now

Really mixed emotions for this song

7/10 

I Love You

Oh no, that synth

Oh no, these percussions

Oh ok, it’s not as slow jammy as I was expecting, that’s nice

This synth is doing some cool things in the background

Random unnamed male rapper time, because of course it is

Bro, two raps from this guy? You literally have a rapper in your group, use her!

Three. Three raps from Mr. Unnamed Male Rapper I stg

7/10

Feeling

Piano with a jam

Bit of distorted vocalizations

Now we’ve got claps, some strings

And here’s the beat

This is really nice actually, I love the build up here

That bass is making itself heard and I’m here for it

Woahhhh okay, I hear you Bada

8/10, solid song, good song

Elegy

Well if “Elegy” isn’t the title of a ballad then I dunno what is

OH MY GOD

iTS FUCKING

WAIT

GENIE??

Okay wait pause the slow jam I need to hear this now

Even the footsteps are the same wtf

And the car door too

Okay, it’s not exactly the same. But there is a 100% chance that Genie is referencing this song with that part.

It’s not the guitar solo you expect when you hear the words “guitar solo” but it sure is the guitar solo that you got

6/10, not bad, but the only part that really caught my attention was the intro

Find A Lover

Back to funky, back to unnamed male rapper

Or is this two dudes?

I really like the rap verse here, with the background vocals over the rap

“Yeah yeah yeahhh,” and actually the background vocals in general doing good work

7/10 I guess, maybe that’s a bit high but 6 for the last one was probably a bit low

For You

I’m waiting for this slow jam to do something that all the other slow jams haven’t done yet

I’ll probably be waiting a long while for that

Oh okay, whispering over instrumentals is new I guess

Sexy male rapper whispering ooooh

Spotify doesn’t have lyrics for this one, damn, didn’t catch the English

6/10, kinda boring, but you know my taste

Kiss

Oh the vocals, they’re so bubblegum

The horn hits are alright

Nmixx change up

Did I just hear a meow?

Mr. Unnamed Male Rapper, this time with guitars in the background

Haha he just said “And now, back to the subject”

People really acting like Nmixx are something new when S.E.S. were doing this shit 25 years ago

7/10

Eternal Love

Apparently this song is also a cover of Nylon Beat

Unfortunately, it happens to be a slow jam

The little bass “vroom” before the chorus is so cute

They always give Bada’s voice this dramatic echo when she hits a high note. Like, c’mon, I can hear her just fine, I don’t need the echo to emphasize it

6/10

[somehwere-between]

Okay so I listened to the whole thing. General overview below.

The good:

actual instrumentals go hard ngl, I genuinely like when they infuse blues and some country twang

actors are solid for what they’re given (Dally’s actor was probably my favorite but whoever did Two-Bit also did amazing)

good voices overall (again, Dally was my favorite)

good use of ensemble

The not-so-good:

lyrics. cringe. like it’s so bad. How do you manage to make fucking Dear Evan Hansen’s “Sincerely, Me” be more endearing??

Music itself felt very all over the place; Broadway to country to 60s blues and then weirdly sappy sorta-country. Very bad whiplash

wtf is up with the Curtis brothers (Darry’s bitterness, Soda being a non-character)

having Dal view Johnny as a brother takes away from the ambiguity of their relationship and to me, it cheapens it

Dally’s death. Why did he die by train. WHAT HAPPENED TO “he died young, violent, and desperate, like we all would someday”?? That’s the core of his character

why is Dally the leader at all? The whole point of the “gang” is that there is no real leader. I guess Dally uses the “for Johnny” line as a rallying cry in the book, but that’s in the hospital

Personal takes:

Not a fan of the Pony-Cherry relationship thing. What happened to the Bob/Dally parallel? Again, that’s a fairly pivotal point in the book and movie

Cherry’s voice was not my favorite. No malice, just personal taste

Where tf is Randy

WHO TF IS ACE?? I’m guessing that’s Steve-but-not but what was the purpose of the change?

Why is Paul here. Bro is like 20

I know Sandy is alluded to with the opening song but c’mon, y’all didn’t even have the decency to be realistic about teen pregnancy? And don’t give me that “it’s a musical” bullshit. It can be a musical and have some realism

I dug “Run Run, Brother”. Like legitimately it goes hard and I found myself humming along a bit. It had genuine passion! Same with “Little Brother” but that one has issues (ahem the ending)

Again, Darry’s bitterness. Yes, he certainly isn’t a great dad figure and he is an ass, but this just made him seem genuinely pissy— did they try to fuse Darry and Steve?

Overall: 4/10. Not nearly as bad as I anticipated but not really good nor particularly memorable if you aren’t already a fan of The Outsiders. But shoutout to the actors, they did try to make it better and I commend that.

If you want a realistic musical with a dysfunctional family, I’d recommend Next to Normal. Uhhh beyond that I guess just listen to most any other musical besides this? No real commentary there.

Listening to The Outsiders musical. It’s not great (wtf are these lyrics) but I do love the music itself and the actors are honestly solid

[the-sun-is-also-a-star]

If you're in the marauders Fandom and youre a wolfstar shipper

And you haven't read All My Cards Are Here on Ao3

What tf are you even doing with your life????

[pokelec]

A Dead By Daylight Novice Reviews All the Killers' Trailers (and makes suggestions for what they'd change)

Reveal trailers are paramount for an audience's first look at new characters. First impressions are everything, so your trailer for your shiny new character needs to be perfect for what's in store for the video game! I started playing DBD a month-ish ago but watched all the trailers for the killers before I started playing, and watching some of them got me to thinking about how I would have changes some of the trailers. Some require no changes, while others I think need an overhaul.

Disclaimer: This is in my personal opinion, is not objective at all, and I'm only doing this because this is something I've been thinking about for a month and need some sort of release or else my brain will implode.

Under a read more bc this gets long.

The Trapper - The first trailer! For a first trailer, I think this one is pretty spot on. It follows a lot of beats of slasher movies, in terms of following a survivor that's gonna be killed, her encountering dead bodies, and the suspense of the killer looking for her. Considering Dead by Daylight is effectively a playable horror movie, I think this is a perfect intro to the game. As for what this means for the Trapper, aka our Jason substitute, I think it showed him off alright! We saw his bear traps and got a good look at him doing this thing. Pretty good, all things considered!

The Wraith - The Wraith, Hillbilly, and Nurse all features gameplay as the means of showing off what the killers can do. The Wraith's isn't too bad, since it does show off his Wailing Bell power enough for people to understand "This is a killer that can turn invisible, and you may not know he's right next to you until it's too late". I wish it has a more cinematic style, but I'll be forgiving here because DBD was still young when this was made. I also thing it showed the new map, Autohaven, pretty well. I'm not too big of a fan of ending the trailer with his mori, but that could be because I don't find his mori exciting.

The Hillbilly - Next is our Leatherface expy! This one feels shorter, still using gameplay to introduce our new killer but at least shows off his chainsaw wielding and hints at the map associated with him. I like the shot of him revving his chainsaw underneath the tree with the animal carcasses! I don't mind the ending with his mori here because even if it's off screen, getting cut with a chainsaw is brutal enough to leave a lasting impression. Again, I wish it had the cinematic style, but it's fine.

The Nurse - I think the Nurse's trailer is the weakest of the three gameplay-focused trailers. The text intro is... fine, but I honestly think it fits the Doctor more. It does an okay job of showing us her Blinking mechanics, but it also doesn't? Like we see her teleporting to Nea, but it feels lackluster. I do like the ending shot of dead Nea as the Nurse just blinks away. I'm not quite sure how to change this trailer to be more effective in my opinion, if I'm being honest.

The Shape/Michael Myers - Our first franchise killer, and a perfect trailer. The first second in, we hear John Carpenter's legendary Halloween score. Even non-horror fans will quickly pick up which killer this is. The suspense of Laurie see Michael, Michael coming up the stairs, and especially the shot of Laurie and Michael being on opposite sides of a door is *chef's kiss*. We see enough of the Shape to be satisfied and eager for his release. It's the perfect trailer for him AND Laurie imo.

The Huntress - Ah, the Huntress. She is my favorite killer to play as, and I probably have the majority of my playtime on her. Unfortunately, I think her trailer leaves a lot to be desired. It's the start of the 'let's look at the killer from different angles, have them turn around to the camera, and then attack the viewer' trend of DBD trailers. I call for a complete rewrite! Here's what I would have done:

The map is Mother's Dwelling. Two survivors (David aaaand idk Dwight?) are running and hides behind some trees. We hear the Huntress's lullaby get louder, and we see the bottom half of her and her axe as she walks past the survivors. The lullaby gets quieter, and the survivors take a sigh of relief. Then, a hatchet is thrown and lodged into Dwight's head! David screams and runs. We then see our full look at the Huntress as she picks up the body. Her signature lullaby continues as the trailer ends.

The Hag - The Hag's trailer also follows a similar formula to the Huntress' trailer. There is an animation bump, so we get to see the Hag's emaciated appearance in full detail. I'm not too mad about that, since the Hag's appearance is unsettling enough to cause viewer distress and curiosity more than the Huntress' would. However, because this is a DBD original killer, we need to see what her deal is with her trailer. Thus, I propose this:

On the swamp, Ace is repairing a generator but hears another survivor (Dwight?) get hooked. Ace goes to rescue him, but we see as he steps on a rune in front of the poor survivor. The illusion of the Hag pops up, jumpscaring poor Ace (and the audience) but disappears. Ace then rescues Dwight for real, but Dwight quickly runs away. Why? Because the real Hag is behind Ace and lunges at him, biting his neck. Trailer ends.

The Doctor - I now realize that my taste in writing DBD trailers is 'have the survivor do a thing, they think the killer is near, they then relax, and only then are they attacked by the killer'. It's a bit stereotypical, but again, we're dealing with a game centered on the horror genre, so that's why I'm okay with it.

I mention this because that's effectively the story beats the the Doctor's trailer follows. Instead of attacking Feng, however, the Doctor just looks at her run and stares menacingly. Even though we don't see the Doctor's shock therapy powers here, I think the long look at the killer is still effective because of his design. A first reaction I (and other reactors) experienced went from the initial "OMG the killer is here, run girl!" to "Why tf are his own eyes and mouth held open like that A Clockwork Orange scene?!". We also don't linger for too long on him either, so I think this trailer works well enough.

The Cannibal/Leatherface - Another franchise killer, this time good ol Leatherface! This trailer is a little different, using text to draw up suspense. I do like the reveal of "What is his mask made of? YOU.", but I would've loved to have seen some actual Cannibal action, or at least his in-game model doing his Texas chainsaw massacring thing.

The Nightmare/Freddy Kruger - Oh, c'mon, we got one of the most well known characters in horror in this little video game, and all we get for his trailer is some scratch marks and a 'killer does nothing but stand there menacingly and attack the camera' trailer?! I do like the detail that when we see him, it's DBD's version of the dream world, but we could've at least featured a survivor falling asleep and then seeing him for themselves.

(Also kinda sad it's the reboot version of Freddy instead of the Wes Craven version and the survivor is Quentin instead of Nancy Freaking Thompson, but I guess we should be happy he's in the game at all)

The Pig - Largely, I think this trailer is pretty good. I'm not too big of a fan of Amanda just standing there menacingly near Dwight, but I do like everything else. I especially love the security camera shot of the famous Saw bathroom and the cutaway when Dwight's reverse bear trap activates (but we still see a good bit of gore!). It feels very Saw-like.

The Clown - This trailer is pretty good! Even though we don't see the Clown in much action, we get a lot of visual storytelling with the bottles, the circus, and the ring of fingers, all leading up to the reveal of his face. The diagetic music from Kate is a nice touch, too.

The Spirit - This one is alright. There is a lot of focus on Adam, but it does build up tension to when the Spirit reveals herself. My biggest problem with it is the ending card that is used for her. Yes, I know that's traditional for the end of these trailers, but her pose and expression is kinda meh after the face she makes when she's about to attack Adam. Seriously, that couple of seconds haunts me (sorry) otherwise.

The Legion - My other favorite killer to play! It's so funny how I didn't like Legion when I first heard of them but now they're my favorites. I love how the trailer emphasizes that the new killer(s) looks similar to survivors and the brutality of when Frank reveals himself and stabs Jeff. However, the trailer does a disservice to the other members of the Legion. C'mon, that's their whole shtick!

My recommendation would be to end with a shot of Julie, Joey, and Suzie joining Frank (and obviously getting a good look at them) and surrounding Jeff right before they all stab him. This is a little disingenuous since you can't play as all four of them at once (unless you count that one Blighted skin...), but you also can't disguise yourself as a survivor, so... Yeah. They are The Legion! They act as one! Treat them as such in their trailer, dammit!

The Plague - The Plague's trailer is interesting. Even though we don't see her in action, I think it's fine because seeing her puke on people during her trailer might be a bit off-putting. Just a bit. We still get some storytelling with her whispered prayers, the candles and incense thingy, and, of course, her face. I think because the Plague's design is inherently unique among all the killers so far, she can get away with the 'let's just tease the audience by looking at the killer and nothing else' trend.

The Ghost Face - Not too much I can complain about with this one. I do like the wtf factor of 'wait, why is a DBD trailer at a modern day warehouse???', especially if you're watching a trailer playlist like I first did. It all makes sense when you learn it's Ghost Face, though! Also, justice for that poor cashier.

The Demogorgon - RIP Stranger Things DLC. I don't watch this series, but I really like the Hawkins Lab map and I'm going to be sad when it's gone. :(

I love this trailer! When I hear the Stranger Things music, it actually gives me chills. I'm legitimately so sad the DLC will be gone from the stores, but I do own them myself. I need to actually sit down and play Demo, Steve, and Nancy one of these days. Why am I crying? No, I'm not kidding, why is this trailer making me cry? Renew the contract, Netflix, please! I don't want this stuff to disappear forever!

(Is it weird that I've been nagged on for years to watch Stranger Things but it's Dead By Daylight that's actually convincing me to watch it?)

The Oni - This is an interesting case. The "main" theme of this trailer is the contrast of modern day Japan's Yui and her motorcycle vs the literal ancient samurai Oni. I think it works out, and again, I think the presentation makes up for us not seeing too much of the new killer.

The Deathslinger - Oh boy, do I love my cowboys! This trailer is nearly perfect. We establish the western setting quickly over the sounds of some poor bastard in pain. The reeling in of the chains and the closeup of The Redeemer is so great. My biggest complaint with this trailer is that we linger a bit too long on the Deathslinger's face at the end. Yeah, he's creepy with his eyes and his disjointed jaw, but you can only look at a horror for so long before you want to move on.

The Executioner/Pyramid Head - I like this trailer! I haven't played Silent Hills, but I'm at least somewhat familiar with the premise and Pyramid Head. I love the shot of him passing the classroom door window and the sword cutting a rift through the ground. Yeah, my lack of SH knowledge makes me unable to recommend any changes here.

The Blight - I have no changes to suggest. The Blight's transformation is super horrific, reminding me of the typical depiction of Jekyll and Hyde. Honestly, he is so much more terrifying in his trailer and in lore than in gameplay.

The Twins - No changes needed. BHVR is really starting to hit their stride with these trailers! Seeing Victor come out of Charlotte's body is amazing.

The Trickster - We depart from all of the other trailers by using an K-POP music video style. It does a good job at referencing some of his story beats (namely torturing/killing people, recording their screams, and using them in his music), but it doesn't really make me afraid of the Trickster. Sure, it fits with his theme, but I would have preferred seeing more of him, y'know, instead of just looking pretty and making faces? I still wouldn't change the art style of the trailer, though. It's fitting enough for him and a breath of fresh air from the doom and gloom.

The Nemesis - No change needed, mostly because I'm not too familiar with the Resident Evil series, but seeing Jill, the twink Leon, and Nemesis on-screen is a very cool moment. Also can we get an F in chat for Meg?

The Cenobite/Pinhead - This is a perfect trailer. We got the Lament Configuration, we got the chains pinning up Dwight, we got Pinhead himself! What more can I ask for?

If you actually made it this far, thank for reading? I don't think I really contribute anything to the fandom with this analysis, but DBD has been living rent free in my brain for the past month, so I may as well write something, eh?

[floweryavenue]

Ugh, so, I don't even know if anyone is actually gonna read this, and I'm not really the one who would participate in fandom very actively (I was always a passive observer, liking other's people content), but the stuff with the leaks of the extra 8 pages of snk ending has been really bothering me for the last few days, and I really need to get a few things off my chest.

I really wanted to wait till 9th June to form my full thoughts. However, since basically all pages have leaked anyway and quite a reliable source confirmed there is basically no additional context to them whatsoever, I decided I might as well write this anyway and vent somewhere to clear my head so I can finally move on with my life to focus on other things I like and with other important irl stuff. Moreover, since Tumblr seems like a reasonably safe space to do so (comparing to one hell of a Twitter...) I might as well do it here. So, let's go.

So, basically, my main problem with those pages is simply that... you just don't do that. No. You don't release an ending, make people think it's really the end, then say you're gonna release a few additional pages that won't change anything but simply clarify some things, and then, two months later, release these pages indeed but not only they don't actually clarify anything, but in fact, create even more plot holes. Furthermore, as a cherry on top, they change the ending quite completely. If those pages had been included in the original release, most people, myself included, would've moved on by now. But noooo, make us go through this hell again. Great :))))

And as for the content of those pages, well... I can't help but feel they really did quite a disservice to Mikasa, one of my favourite female characters ever. My biggest problem isn't even that she 'moved on' (whatever that means at this point, coz I feel like fandom has been successfully managing to butcher that term ever since 139 has dropped) and started a family on her own because I'm fully aware that falling in love again after you first love died is an entirely normal thing irl. But ffs, we're not talking about irl here; we're talking about snk and Mikasa. And the thing that MAINLY bothers me, is the way it has been presented.

I'm not going to delve into the husband's possible identities, 1) I'm not interested at all in participating in any ship wars, 2) because we don't even get to see his face and sources say we indeed don't get any direct confirmation in that regard. Not that this matters anyway, because we get presented with Mikasa on the one hand staring her own family, but on the other, still continuing to visit Eren's grave repeatedly throughout her life and in the end, getting buried with a scarf on, her dearest remembrance of Eren, and maybe even getting buried next to him (even tho, the latter is still not 100% confirmed, bcs here sources are contradictory, but judging by the general mood of those pages, I'd not be surprised at all if it turns out to be the case).

That makes me think the whole family-stuff was used only to present the passage of time and the fact that Mikasa never fully got over Eren, bcs we don't see the family in any other context besides the visits to the grave. And that leads me to my other question - was introducing the family really NECESSARY, then? Couldn't Mikasa simply visit the grave with Armin, and maybe even with Armin, Annie and their kids? Idk about you, but that would make 100% more sense to me. Also, don't get me even started, how much in the wrong way it rubs me that Mikasa, the character who, as we know, always deeply cared about others, even strangers (Gabi, etc.), would just drag her husband, her children and grandchildren to the grave of her first love on which she had written 'my most beloved, my dear'? Do I really need to elaborate on how WEIRD that is?

But I guess that's on me for believing a male author would write a satisfactory conclusion to the main female character (not Mikasa touring around Hizuru, not Mikasa playing with kids at the orphanage, no! Forced family plot, instead! Take that!)

As of Eremika, aka my most cherished paring ever since 2014... I guess the only good thing in that mess is that at least it doesn't invalidate them. If anything, it validates them even more, because the stuff I've mentioned earlier prove their love was eternal and Mikasa never truly got over it. So, all in all, I'm gonna still cherish them forever. There are still many unexplored aspects of their bond, so I believe we, as a community, have a big room to explore (pls, I'm begging you, explore with me all the possibilities of their four years in the cottage in the mountains, I swear, that sh!t has so much potential it's unbelievable).

As of Paradis getting destroyed, well, that leaves me bitter, even though after doing some thinking, that really might be the least out of place thing in those pages. At least according to sources, it happens when Mikasa is already dead, so at least Eren's wish of giving his friends long, secure lives came true. However, that would be it.

And as of titan's power still being there and some kid apparently finding the source of it... this just screams 'sequel-baiting', AND I ABSOLUTELY HATE IT. That's it.

To end my definitely too long rambling, I just wanna say, I really would have liked to wait till 9th June to publish my thoughts, but as I've said, those last few days have been driving me crazy and I really wanted just to get all of it off my chest and move on. I want for now to just focus on my irl things, like working on my master's thesis and other stuff giving me joy, like Eurovision next week coming back after 2-years-absence due to pandemic. Eurovision is one of the few things that I love, and I intend on fully enjoying it next week, not sulking on those leaks too much. And if by some completely unexpected miracle I get pleasantly surprised on 9th June (even tho I truly doubt it at this point) - that would be only a win for me, I guess.

Anyway, please remember, all that I have written here is ONLY MY OPINION, and if you disagree with anything, that's valid, you're completely entitled to that. I'm not publishing this to argue with anybody, only to clear my head. That's it.

If anyone has read this too long personal rant of mine - thank you, I'm kissing you on the forehead right now. 

Oh, and remember - EREMIKA IS CANON. And always will be (no, that one is not up for discussion). 

Also, we have that official High School AU, and Eren right now is quietly snoozing on Mikasa's shoulder during another Twilight marathon she made him to take part in, and Armin and Annie are dissing people together on reddit while bonding over their pretentious taste in music. That's canon, Isayama told me after I had phoned him to ask wtf.

PS To think I was almost sure those extra pages will be about Mikasa's reunion with the rest of the alliance... I guess it's time to put that clown make up on. 

[toberlonetrombone]

4, 7, 14, 22, 30 for the music asks

4. a song that reminds you of your favorite season

First though was "get cool" -stray kids because of the lyric "Kicking leaves in the autumn breeze..."

Also "blame it on the rain" -he is we. Idk that song just makes me feel like I'm in a nice autumn day 🤷🏻‍♀️

7. a song your friend introduced you to that you ended up loving

Oh gosh honestly most of my music taste has been handed to me by my friends 😂 it's how I got into all my emo music. BUUUT a recent one that I can think of is "Let me" specifically Mark's English version 😅 it's a very addicting simp song

14. a song with the name of a place in the title

Literally the only thing coming to mind was "Hotel California" which slaps don't get me wrong. But I ended up looking up a list of songs like that so I could think of other bc my brain was being stupid 😂😂but a good one is "Africa" -toto for the gays obviously

WATERLOO BY ABBA DUUUUHH (listen my brain can't think ever 😂)

22. a song you related to in the past and present, but for different reasons

Okay this one is interesting and honestly I'm not sure. The first one I thought of was "blame it on the rain" -he is we (again) but like technically relate to it for similar reasons.

Okay this one is actually hard to answer. Like most of the songs I realted to when I was younger I still do and for the same reasons. I'm literally scrolling through my music being like "okay related to that one, and yup same reasons as before so that doesn't count."

So two that I will accept as "different." First song is "The Grey" -icon for hire. Found that song/band in my really bad suicidal time of my life and that whole song is about that basically. It's about being on the edge between giving up and fighting hence 'the grey.' So back then I related a lot to the giving up portions (not gonna lie still do sometimes I'm still not in a good place mentally. Doing better but ya know.) But I would say now I relate a little more to the not giving up parts of the song, where it's about wanting to fight and survive.

The other song would be "For Good" from wicked. I relate to it with my best friend I wouldn't be where I am today without her. But it was also my senior song for choir so I relate it to my whole choir more now, but also my new friends too. I've been able to become independent because of you guys and so that song makes me think of y'all now too 💖💖

30. your all-time favorite song

Bruh that's a big ask wtf. Idk that has to change a lot tbh. But I guess a consistent song I'll always love and go back to would be a few so I'll just list with no explanation since this is long enough. But if y'all want to know why either ask or listen and see if you can figure it out.

"sarabeth (skin)"- rascal Flatts

"stealing Cinderella"- Chuck Wicks

"part of your world"- The little mermaid

"now you know"- icon for hire

"hallelujah" -specifically Pentatonix version

[domjaehyun]

omg i’m the anon who sent u the six thirty ask and ma’am. jeno fic…. BARK BARK i’m down bad for 00 line rn send help. also just abt haechan like WHY IS HE GETTING IN MY HEAD AND HEART RIGHT NOW !!!! FOR FREE TOO SO DISRESPCTFUL. he is just sooo good at singing i want him to serenade me and on top of that HES CLEVER AND WITTY AND FUNNY ??? why does he have it all i’ll literally die. btw. positions literally my favorite ari album like it has some type of hold on me like idk why but that album … every song …. ari put her whole pussy in that she ate it tf up. and idk y’all she wrote that for me and tumblr user domjaehyun only the rest of y’all stay safe. and what do you mean ‘yes you can ask which ones i’m switching to haechan if you’re curious.’ YOU KNOW IM CURIOUS. hand over precious secrets. ugh I’M SO EXCITED TO SEE ALL THE NEW THINGS YOURE GOING TO WRITE !!!! you’re so talented i literally can’t wait i wish you all the luck in writing them because i am going to be dropping everything to read them whenever they come out. I HOPE YOURE HAPPY WITH EVERYTHING YOU WRITE AND ARE TAKING CARE OF URSELF WHILE U DO SO NO RUSH BABEY ITS ABT WHEN YOU WANNA DO IT !!

:D HI HI I'M HAPPY YOU'RE BACK I LIKE YOU HJSDFKLGJ

i am ... into jeno ... i like him ... or whatever ... 🙄 ugh... BARK BARK IS RIGHT BABY I AM BARKING WITH YOU IN SPIRIT !!! no for real haechan is actually fucking with my life it is approaching brainrot levels . i saw a gifset of him earlier (i rbed it to my other blog) and i . am not kidding when i say this mf literally had me staggering and stumbling in the middle of rite aid while waiting to pick up meds... he makes me SICK i want him. i want him so bad i'm going insane (ended up putting this under a cut bc . this got long.......apologies)

HIS VOICE- please i really might start crying . might do that for real . he has my absolute favorite voice in all of nct.... HOLO WHEN? GIVE IT TO ME. PLS . P L E A S E . he's got such a unique voice oh m y g o d. i'm going to cry ple a se. oh god

NO FR HE'S SO FUCKING SMART HE'S SO . *SOBBING* I NEED TO BE HELD RIGHT NOW WTF LIKE . listen also i just think it's important to note that like . he's funny IN KOREAN to me. yes he's said funny shit in english too but like . he says shit that is just like . Fucking Funny. he has an elite sense of humor i think like truly bc it can transcend language & culture and im like . fuck ... that's so hot ... do you know how fucking intelligent you have to be TO MAKE PEOPLE LAUGH IN A DIFF FUCKING LANGUAGE THAN THEY SPEAK? he's got also like a very physical humor to him i think like that's also so sexy and admirable he's so expressive ... in love with him truly he's so fucking fine what the FUCK

ALSO YES. IMPECCABLE TASTE. also fr i rly do think i like . fw ariana heavy......... like i rly rly do i love her vibes as a person and i love her music and her talent i just adore her sm oh my god. ASFDJGFKD she did this for us 💖 everyone go listen to smth else rn . KIDDING i want her to get all the clout & money she deserves oh my god. ALSO WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE SONG FROM THE ALBUM 👀 OR LIKE I GUESS YOUR TOP FAVES / A RANKING OR SMTH !!! i am curious hehe

and omg okay I DIDN'T WANNA JUST LIKE . INUNDATE YOU WITH INFO YOU DIDN'T ASK FOR JKSGFKFJK JUST WANTED TO BE . SURE YOU ACTUALLY CARED YKNOW !!! but omg okay so . the two fics i'm considering changing to haechan fics from that collection are: obvious from the original collection (currently a lucas fic) & pov from the extended collection (currently a kun fic) ...and ngl i am tempted to also change love language from the original collection too (currently a xiaojun fic) but like . i'm on the FENCE !!! like i like haechan s o much ... but i don't wanna like . idk . make my positions collection like The Haechan Show (even though like. it fucking should be. he deserves it i think) esp bc that wasn't the original plan :( like what if all the fans of the members i was GONNA write about got all excited for the fics and then . i let them down :(

SIDE NOTE I ALSO JUST NOTICED ALL THREE OF THE FICS I WANNA CHANGE TO HAECHAN ARE ALL ABT WAYV MEMBERS I'M SO SORRY THAT REALLY WAS NOT DELIBERATE SJDFGKD haechan is just someone that feels SO versatile to me ... like he can do it all... it's remarkable ...

hhHHHHhh i think whenever i start working on them i might like . do a lil poll and see if ppl would be like . genuinely upset abt it or like . how ppl feel in general .... note: i'm still probably gonna end up doing what i want...bc that is just how i roll 💖 but i would def like want an idea of how it might be received yknow?

SORRY BABY I RANTED AT YOU JDKFGLKSD in my defense... it's your fault . it's not my fault you have thoroughly enjoyable vibes 🙄 THANK YOU SO MUUUUCH THANK YOU IM HAPPY YOURE SO SUPPORTIVE AND EXCITED :D I HOPE YOU LIKE THE STUFF I'M WORKING ON!!! in my mind i am giving u a v big hug (if you want it) bc i like you okay moving on la la la gonna shut up now

[inquisitiveheretic]

1, 11, 17, 46?

1.) top 3 favorite bands of all time & top 3 favorite bands currently?

MAN impossible question wtf. okay uh

of all time: queen, marika hackman, daft punk

right now: death grips, fiona apple, blue öyster cult

11.) how has your music taste changed in the last 5 years?

i actually developed one LMAO . okay no i started getting into more aggressive, experimental stuff, widened my scope of what i understood to be 'music'. when i say i'll listen to almost any genre i do mean it

17.) tell me some unpopular music opinions you have. it could be about a song, an album, a musician, the music industry as a whole, anything.

im irritated by the ideas that 'most music is way overproduced these days' & 'production can be its own part of musical art/creation' are mutually exclusive to ppl . i love lo-fi but i also like slick electronic & it's less to do with modern production techniques in general & more to do with like .... knowing yr genre

46.) how did you get into your favorite band?

just .. noticed i liked a lot of their popular songs, listened to their entire discography in order, realized their incredible range, got obsessive for a year & a half (then the film came out </3)

music asks

[teethhunter]

Jon/Gerry/Martin from TMA

Or Ruby/Emerald from RWBY for the ship ask

Okay you get both! Thank you for the opportunity to talk about two of my recent hyperfixation fandoms lol. Ruby/Emerald who’s the cuddler: Initally Ruby, but that changes over a long period of time, Emerald once completely comfortable is the cuddler.

who makes the bed: Neither of them do, messy blankets4lyfe

who wakes up first: Ruby, girl wtf how do you get out of bed so quickly.

who has the weird taste in music: Emerald, I mean she lived on the streets and then with the weirdest fucked up group of people for quite a while so she knows exclusively niche indie stuff.

who is more protective: Both can be, but Ruby is more likely to put herself into danger (stupidly) to protecc. Emerald is better at subtle threats to those who threaten Ruby.

who sings in the shower: Ruby, loudly and at the oddest hours possible.

who cries during movies: Emerald simply because there's so many movies she hasn't seen that she isn't immune to the emotional climax moments.

who spends the most while out shopping: Ruby, she's just not quite as good at shoplifting (but she's learning!)

who kisses more roughly: Huh I hadn't even thought about this before but I sorta headcanon that kissing isn't a big thing in their relationship? I universally headcanon Ruby as a biter, but that's just me.

who is more dominate: They are pretty good at switching that up as per each other's needs.

my rating of the ship from 1-10: 8/10 Apparently I do ship Ruby with all characters of complementary colors to her :/// oops Jon/Gerry/Martin who’s the cuddler: They all are, but Jon is most *grabby hands* about it.

who makes the bed: Gerry does actually

who wakes up first: Jon does, technically because his brain just has an internal alarm clock for 'go to work' but he has learned how to go back to sleep. Martin is first out of bed these days.

who has the weird taste in music: Gerry and Jon can vibe about weird music taste. Martin is in the corner listening to Enya

who is more protective: This is a triad of protective in different ways though Jon and Martin mutually get their feathers particularly ruffled if something happens to Gerry.

who sings in the shower: Jon (look I'm a sucker for the 'the mechanisms existed in tma stuff)

who cries during movies: Gerry does the least, sucker refuses to wear properly waterproof eyeliner. Jon has cried watching nature documentaries- the hyper empathy is Intense. Martin cries at a well done meaningful emotional moment in most movies.

who spends the most while out shopping: Depends on where they're shopping, but if it's grocery shopping then it's Martin. It didn't used to be, he's recovering from the 'I don't deserve nice things' mentality and now buys nice stuff for himself and partners.

who kisses more roughly: Jon bites, like a lot? Neither of them mind it Martin is rough only if in public where he can show off just a lil Gerry's the most consistently mid-level amount actually, he's go with the flow.

who is more dominate: Martin, but in that service top way that they don't even realize how much they're submitting most of the time.

my rating of the ship from 1-10: 7/10 it is very good but hasn't been on my radar a whole lot. Polyam good, Gerry good, all of this is good.

[cassfcky]

So, I'll finally open up about the finale, it took me a while to understand what I felt. I loved it and hated, I think it's beautiful and a hate crime, but I'll explain it as I try to cope with this feeling.

Things that I loved about it:

Dean(in the beginning) being able to move on with all the lost and sorrow he had just experienced, to see him going on was nice, I mean we know he was sad, but he wasn't giving up on it, he was living for those wo died for him and I don't mean just Cass, a lot of others have died in the past for the brothers and to see Dean living for them was good, he finally made peace with himself and I loved it.

Sam(also in the beginning) also living his life, hunting, but we can tell(maybe I'm just hallucinating) they weren't so deep on the hunt thing and for me this was good, cuz Sam was also going to get what he wants a normal life with his brother you know?

Kripke and Singer being their agents aliases

Heaven rebuild in a fantastic way and I did liked to see Bobby at the roadhouse, this makes me wonder and dream about Bobby, Ellen, Jo, Pam and Ash altogether in it, joking around and having fun.

Cass being alive.

The case

The fact that they were helping brothers, that reminded us of them.

The parallels with season 1 such as

"I can't do this without you"

Dean's death being almost like Sam's first death (both "stabbed/impaled in the back and dying in his brother's arms.

Things I hated:

Dean's death: There's no reason for it, I know the show is about Sam's journey and his life, but Dean being alive it's not exactly a set back in his development. So you can say they have a strong co-dependency, but isn't clear that their story was written by Chuck? Their choices? So now without the a**hole they not necessarily need to go on with it, they can be loving brothers with their separated lives, they can hunt together without dragging the other down, they can live a "happy" life without the other dead, they can be free without the death of the other. The show has always showed us how they're "happy" living their lives when the other is dead, like Dean with Lisa while Sam was in hell, Sam and Amelia when Dean is in purgatory. But it also shows how they let go of all of that when they comeback and this is Chuck's co-dependency writing. But now that they ARE free, they don't need to do it anymore, they can live, they can grow even more, they can get to know themselves again as individuals and not as puppets fighting apocalypse after apocalypse.

They ruined their own ideal. The show is now, not only about the brothers, but how you can make family out of friendship(personal note: this is my fav thing about the show, cuz I don't have a good blood family and I made my own with my friends, so this one hits hard on me). The whole "family don't end in blood" situation was totally forgotten when Sam, alone with a dog, made Dean's funeral. And do I need to remind you all that Dean wanted it big?? With music, lot of people? No?? Ok. But let's say make it half big, where's Jody? Donna? Claire? Alex? Where's all of them?? I mean just the close one's you know? The one's who was there for them when they needed the most?

Where the fuck was Eileen? They killed her and got her back, they created a lovely arc for her and Sam, a healthy relationship, something good for Sam. And when Jack uses the gauntlet to bring everyone back she's not back? Like where is she? Still in the gem?? And okay, that blurred woman could have been her, but they didn't even mentioned her name once? Wedding picture?? What is that?? They could've done it, I know, it's a fucking 15 year old running show, one wedding picture so we could dream would be enough(I guess)

Castiel being mentioned twice vaguely. So, your best friend confess to you that he made a deal that in the moment he experienced TRUE HAPPINESS he would be DRAGGED to NOTHING and then turns out HIS happiness consist in him telling(not even having it back, just telling) you that he loves you and that he is changed because of you and uses this to SAVE YOU and you don't tell you brother(his best friend too) what happend? When you get to Heaven and you hear the news that his actually alive and helping you don't get to want to see him??? Like not even asks or say anything?? Or like when Jack became God why didn't he asked for Cass back? He asked Chuck for it, Chuck, but didn't asked Jack?? Like wtf?? Kid would've snapped his finger so quickly that Cas would show up in Dean's lap like wtf?? That doesn't make any sense.

The 15 years of character growth thrown away.

Other topics related to this event.

Dean's deaths that were more painful, sad looking and more meaningful than 15x20

Metatron killing him (9x23)

His deal (3x16)

Dean's death reminds me of pointless deaths and how they were unnecessary in the show.

Charlie: she wasn't that stupid to leave with a book that can be traced by a deadly family just because Rowena was annoying, that still makes no fucking sense to me. I cry every time I watch it cuz she deserved better, way better.

Crowley: like they literally killed him for nothing, he sacrificed himself for nothing, there was no reason other than hold back a little bit Lucifer and he could've done it without killing himself.

Cas's death remind me of how only the brothers matter and in the end only Sam was important, don't get me wrong I love Sam, but the show praised hope, faith in one another and in the end it was just one of them going, not truly happy as he could be and to me that's too sad, cuz not only Dean didn't got to live what he deserved, but Sam also had a half empty life, the person who raised him, that was with him through all the bad moments, wasn't there for the good one. The idea of Sam having survivor guilt because Dean lived to take care of him and as soon as he could finally live for himself he dies will forever hunt me, it's just too much, he did not deserved it.

I guess that what the show did with the end was destroy all of my hope, they destroyed everything they created, the love, the foundation of a family and having faith and hope. This show literally gave me all of this, the idea of "it's bad now, but if I don't give up, it will get better", but they took it all. No friends at your funeral, no brother on your side at your wedding day, no hope. Like Dean only had peace when he died, do you know how serious this is? How depressing is this? Sam lived in grief(and yeah grief doesn't stop you from feeling happiness, but what was the reason for him to live with grief?)

I mean why did they make us dream and believe in life if they were just going to say "well you can live hell on earth and get your win, but you're not gonna live enough to fully enjoy it."

The resume is that this ending was cruel, not good or bad just cruel. Cuz they won, but they didn't get to experience it. You know what would be heartbreaking, but good and coherent with their story?? If they had died defeating Chuck, their ultimate fight, they get to save everyone, but unfortunately not themselves. It would be great, sad, it would make sense. This one gave Dean the taste of a good life, a normal life, the glimpse of it and took it away from him, killing him in a barn, scared. But hey, at least he got to tell his brother that he loved him right?? That's a win!!

[marveloussupernerd]

I loved the platonic Zen one so much! Would you want to wrrite it from Zen's pOV and he is in love with MC? He would be just staring at her and in love with her but MC is too drunk to notice? Thanks!

Uhm this is literally such a cute idea !? I’ve never written from Zen’s POV and first person makes me feel silly... but let’s throwback to English terms I’m going to use third person limited to him :)) I hope that works for you

Wtf is this POV. Idk. I always refer to the lovely reader as “you.” Today you are “she/her.” If you want something gender neutral feel free to request ! Also I’m sorry if this sucks I’m playing around with points of view

Clubbing - Zen (Zen’s POV)

Warnings: alcohol (duh)

Summary: you’ve had a long day at work. Zen has been meaning to take you to some of his favorite clubs. You’re so pretty... even when you’re drunk, even more so when Zen is drunk. He’s caught feels

She had had the worst week ever, or that’s what it had sounded like. She was texting Zen everyday after work giving her update: “People were extra shitty today,” “working late,” “Friend’s being a real bitch.”

This week had sucked for her. Zen was determined to make it better though! She sounded so tired over the phone. Just exhausted of all the shit she had to put up with. So he recommended they go out clubbing, get super wasted together and let it all out. He knew it’d be therapeutic for her and, heck, maybe with a few drinks in him he’d forget how bubbly and hot he felt around her all the time. That’s the last thing she needed tonight.

He knew she was in desperate need of a fun night, so he picked the bar that he frequented that was right by a college campus. The scene was always lively and the people were nice. It’d be a good pick. His Uber arrived to the spot first. He had to look cool while he waited for you. He had dressed the part! Ripped jeans, a plain white shirt that was slightly fitted to give a little taste at his muscles, and the leather jacket he had pulled out from the back of his closet. He looked pretty cool, and definitely hot. His fans would have a heart attack seeing him in this ensemble, leaning against the wall, a smirk on his face.

When she got out of her Uber, though, that whole persona fell flat. He felt like an idiot. Why was he leaning against the wall! That was so stereotypical. His smirk had definitely changed, hopefully to a smile instead of a grimace. He was being an idiot.

But wow. She looked so good. She had on a skirt that looked so soft and her legs looked so pretty and he was staring at her legs for way too long. And her shirt was a high-necked, slightly cropped top. Not enough to show off her stomach, but just enough to hang there where a little bit of skin would peek out when she moved. She was so so beautiful. She didn’t even have to try. Of course, she had. She looked amazing. Ahhh how long had he been staring!? Say something! Say anything!

“Hey!” It was supposed to sound way cooler than that, way more chill. It came out as more of an exclamation. He was just so excited to see her.

She walked closer to him, a smile on her face. “This better be worth the commute,” she teased. It was a long Uber ride here, but he’d just have to make the trip even more worth it. The pressure was on.

He pushed himself off the wall so that he could better face her. “Oh it will! I’ve been so busy I haven’t been here in a while, but I doubt it’s changed.” He made his way into the building, staying close to her side. It often got pretty busy here. “It’s right outside of a college so you get all the fun college students here.” He had to raise his voice to speak over the music, but she seemed to be listening thoughtfully, a smile on her face as she nodded. God, that smile! Look anywhere else, Zen.

“Sounds messy,” she commented, her eyes scanning across the college students already getting drunk. Her gaze focused on a group of sorority girls in super high cut crop tops and high-waisted shorts. She pulled down her shirt subconsciously to cover up more of her stomach. It shot a pang to Zen’s heart. Did she really think she was any less attractive than these girls? She was so much more beautiful than them.

He chose not to comment on it though, instead following their conversation, explaining how all the students here were fun, as compared to regular bars where there were always people moping mixed in the crowds. He only ever came here when he wanted to get completely hammered and have a good time, but considering that’s what she needed, this was the perfect spot.

She was gazing at him for a little too long; Zen felt his body heat up under her gaze. What was she thinking about? Hopefully only good things. She continued on the conversation as though nothing had happened. “So, what do you typically start with here?”

“Shots. Classic move, especially for the med school students. You’ll see them soon enough. They start off with fireball then make their way down to the cheapest vodka as they get more drunk and can’t actually taste it.” It sounded like he had been here too much; he hoped he didn’t sound like an alcoholic.

But she didn’t judge him. She never had. She was so sweet. She just smiled, suggesting they follow their influence.

Zen offered to go get the drinks, heading up to the bar and placing their order. His eyes caught his own in the reflection in a mirror on the back wall. Why did he look so nervous? He’d need more alcohol to get through tonight. He requested another round of shots.

She seemed surprised to see the four shot glasses he balanced back. “Do they normally do two at once?” She asked, not bothering to hide the surprise in her face.

He shook his head. Don’t blush. Don’t blush. “Nah, they’re too broke for that. But I thought” that I didn’t want to be fawning over you all night. That I can’t look at you without thinking how pretty you are. That alcohol would help. “It’d be fun,” he finally mustered out. He handed her the shot glass, IGNORING how he felt as they brushed hands when they clinked their glasses against each other’s. He downed it smoothly, the burning feeling at his throat deliciously taking his mind off of her. That is until she had her mouth puckered and was shaking her head, holding back a cough. She looked cute even while doing that. “Good?” He asked her, still taking in her reaction.

“Perfect.” She grinned. “Round 2?”

“Already?” Thank God. More alcohol equals less strange feelings.

She laughed. His heart fluttered. “Well, it’s here isn’t it? The faster we can get drunk the better.”

Amen. He clinked the second glass and downed it even quicker than the first.

They got drunk fast. Zen had a constant stream of alcohol flowing through his body, begging it to stop thinking of her in that way. She tried to keep up with him, though, which got her drunk as well in no time.

“Will you sing karaoke with me?” He asked, his face heating up the second he realized what he had asked. What a strange question. One she’d never agree-

“Sure!” She laughed out loud. “I’ll even let you pick the song.”

Any song. Any song. A song he could remember the words to. A song you definitely knew. Maybe something a little romantic? No. Probably not. He settled on “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough.” A perfect duet. It’d show off his voice well, everyone knew it, it was cute without being too lovey.

He clicked the wrong song. “Before He Cheats” started playing. Not what he intended at all. He stumbled up to the stage and grabbed the microphone, desperate to pull attention away from such an odd choice of a song. “Hey, I’m Zen and this is my...” he blanked into the microphone. NOT girlfriend. Friend. Friend. “Best friend!” He introduced, announcing her name for the audience before the song had begun.

She took the song in stride. In fact... she probably got too into it? “This is for my asshole ex!” She cheered at the instrumental break. The crowd went wild.

Say something say something say something. “A-and all my old managers who told me I’d never make it,” he added. Everyone cheered again.

She made her way over to him, time seeming to slow as he watched her foot catch on the microphone cord, leaping to action to catch her before she could hit the ground, arms around her back as she had one on his chest to steady herself. His body felt like it was on fire.

“That would’ve hurt like a bitch,” she commented, laughing. She was drunk drunk, huh? He helped her up, grasping her hand firmly and guiding her over the wire to his side of the stage. They finished the performance hand-in-hand; he hadn’t wanted to let go.

Once they got off the stage, they didn’t get a moment of relieve, a man calling her name. Why did he introduce her? Nobody had the right to cat call her like this. He whipped around to face the man, blinding white anger in his eyes. She had such a shitty week, she didn’t need this. “If you so much as look at her right now I swear to God I’ll knock you into-“ his eyes widened as he took in the startled blonde boy in front of him. “Yoosung?”

Yoosung didn’t move, unintimidated by drunk Zen. “Hi!” He greeted. She turned to face him, her skirt fanning as she moved. Zen snapped his eyes away from her and back to the man in question. “You guys are kinda drunk.”

They burst into laughter. Duh!! Wasn’t that obvious. “What are you doing here?” Zen asked, ignoring the previous comment.

“Oh, well I live right down the street.”

Her eyes lit up in enlightenment. “Oh my goodness you are a college student!” She seemed very proud of this discovery.

Yoosung went on about playing LOLOL but Zen was more focused on her, the smile on her lips, not reserved as it sometimes was, but in full form, nothing held back. The way her eyes sparkled under the light and... back to the conversation at hand.

“Oh! I have a great idea!” He interrupted Yoosung’s very boring story, focusing the conversation on her.

“I’d love to hear it.” She was always so nice.

“Why don’t we just crash at Yoosung’s place tonight? We won’t have to pay for an Uber.”

Yoosung seemed shocked. “But-“

“That’s pretty smart,” she butted in, nodding. “What do you think Yoosung?”

She could get anyone to listen to her. She was so damn charming. Yoosung didn’t stand a chance. “I- I guess that’s okay. As long as I can play LOLOL.”

“Yay!” She cheered, clapping excitedly. “We can go now. Lead the way.”

As the three headed out of the bar, Zen noticed her walking was shaky. He wrapped an arm around her shoulder to steady her and she followed suit. They weren’t much more stable walking down the street, but he felt better having his arm around her to keep her safe. Yoosung had unlocked the door for them and they shuffled in.

“I only have like... a bed and a couch,” he explained. “But we can figure something out.”

She let go of Zen’s body, leaping out of his grip to look around the place. “Wow Yoosung! This is cute as hell.” She was cute as hell.

Zen made his way to the couch, plopping down on it at the same time as her. His legs banged into hers clumsily, but he shifted so that she could lay on top of his. Were they really going to sleep in the same place?

“Is that really comfortable?” Yoosung asked, directing his attention to her. “You can take my bed.”

Zen glanced over at her, pouting. He was not sharing a couch with Yoosung, especially after almost getting to share it with her. She seemed to get the hint. “Nah, this is great. Will you get us a blankie though?”

As Yoosung left to get the blanket, Zen shrugged off his jacket, tossing it to the floor. She ran her hand through her hair, the locks falling messily around her face. Yoosung came back and draped the blanket over the two of them. “Is this okay?” He had asked.

Zen chuckled, cozying up to the blanket. “Perfect. Thanks Dad,” he teased. Yoosung blushed more. She giggled.

“Night Yoosungie! Don’t stay up all night.” She called. He wanted a nickname. Not fair. Yoosung set down some Advil and water on the coffee table and wished them good night. The room was suddenly silent.

“I want a nickname too.” Zen whispered.

“Zen isn’t even your real name,” she retorted.

He groaned. “I want a cute name like Yoosungie. Why don’t I get a cute name.”

“You’re plenty cute already,” she muttered, clearly tired. “Goodnight Zenny,” she giggled, blowing him a kiss. He fake-caught it, pinning it to his chest. Maybe tonight wasn’t all that bad after all.

[mcrmadness]

The vaccine really made me feel like I was hit by a truck. Also I am so tired no matter how little or much I would sleep.

But I also saw some very weird and somewhat interesting dreams as I took a nap on the sofa.

I'm not entirely sure where did this dream take place, like in, at which time. I feel like I was a pre-teen but also already an adult. I was to some sort of a family party, I think, and I met there this boy whose aesthetic and music taste were exactly what I had been looking for - aka he listened to most same music as I do too, and he had black hair and was dressed in black, a bit punk or metal looking outfit.

I remember talking with him and thinking he seems awesome and I wish we could be friends. I think he had a crush on me but I told him I'm not into that, he had even bought a ring for me and I remember at some point being in some room and he took out the ring and I just said something like "You gotta be kidding me." and he just said "No no!" and there was a third person with us and he turned her around and dropped the ring into her pants from behind wtf.

Then the dream changed, and I think I was either in the future or in current time and that had been just a flashbacks/memory/an event from the past. I just randomly started thinking about that guy because I had genuinely liked him as a person but somehow accidentally ruined the friendship when I turned him down when he had a crush on me, and I couldn't think rationally and am socially awkward so we just kinda grew apart. But then I started to feel like I really want to meet with him again, and I started asking about him from everyone. I even found a photo he had given to me that day and noticed that there was text written behind the photo but for some reason I never saw it before because I just didn't look at the photo properly.

I then was able to find his name from somewhere, maybe someone told it to me. And I started tracking him down but, a spoiler alert: never actually managing to find him, I think. I also at some point was at my parents' house and my brother and dad looked at each other if they knew something, and I asked something about that guy and my brother was like "We know you would be into him." and my dad asked if he's my crush, and I just almost shouted "No!"

The dream also had slight dystopian feels to it. We were at a house with the whole family, maybe trying to help my aunt to move out, when she just suddenly got really mad at me and basically cut all contact to all of us because of me. There were also some places that reminded me more of the old Tom Raider games or so, a huge room with lava or something and I was just trying to find that guy I felt was the person I had been looking for my whole life without realized he had been there all along, but I couldn't find him.

At some point there was also some movie scene shooting going and someone was in a pond and was supposed to swim and dive from under a boat that was dipped over but his bathrobe got stuck to the boat so he started laughing and they had to take it over.

Anyway, that dream was very weird because it felt realistic and also a bit... hopeful? But that guy in the dream does not exist. I have never seen him before, and I also cannot remember how his face looked like, maybe he had only a dream-like face that is but isn't really there. The name was just totally random and very stupid Finnish-sounding name that didn't fit his "face" or style at all, but I also can't remember what the name was supposed to be. Maybe something like "Viljami" (a Finnish, altho not that common, name).

[finalgirlagatha]

reacting to heathens galore a week after the one year anniversary

uh hi guys. happy fanfic writer friday! today i’m going to be revisiting my most popular sge fic and third most popular fic overall (for reasons i do not understand) so, yeah let’s get into this 

its just trivia and cringe. also it’s long so... beware. 

i don’t understand why people like this fic. i’m going to start off with this. i know it was only a year ago but it feels so much longer and i legitimately can’t get through reading it without shriveling up into a ball and dying 

one time someone asked me, ‘why tagaphie?’ and i genuinely do not know why. the sister twist was dead to me even though this fic came out slightly after acot. i just wanted agatha to be happy. 

i hadn’t read the camelot years at the time, because i didn’t think they needed to exist 

i still don’t, not really, but moving on-

hhh why so many drug jokes. why. whyyy. 

this was drafted in 2018 and i know that doesn’t explain all the drug jokes but i was living in colorado at the time so maybe that’s it. 2018 me needed to get a grip 

yeah i hc hort as a stoner what about it? how else could you explain why he is the way he is

heres the embarrassing moment where i admit i was planning on writing one sided! hophie the entire time but the writer of the first and best horavan fic commented (i almost passed out) and i was like ‘what if... i did a thing’ 

i should’ve made this a nineties chatroom au with the ancient slang i’m using

the any1 hort uses haunts my dreams. i just want to talk :) 

teenagers are mean i’m so sorry teddy

i was not the biggest fan of tedros back then but i’ve changed i swear

chapter one haunts me  let’s move on 

bruh 

feels bad man

is it really a group chat fic if no one makes fun of the use of ‘y’all’ ? 

that link never attached and i’m noticing this now. i think it was supposed to be this tru.mp4 because roasting cowboys is funny to me

ravan gets the most dramatic anime entrance because i love him and HE CAN  

snake charmer is such a stupid username

i was going to do this thing where everyone's usernames were their circus talents but i forgot

this is uma slander and i will not stand for it

the time span between chapter four through chapter thirteen is friday to saturday.

this fic is the reason i started shipping chaddick/ravan. enemies to lovers 25k slowburn you know it 

i’m so ashamed of all the dick jokes i made. i’m like a middle school boy. 

WHY DID I LAUGH THIS IS SO BAD JSHDJJSHD

“im 🙋‍♂️not 🙅‍♂️emo🤬🕶️ i just like🥰😍 a lot of music💽.”- Hort Scourie, 2019

a friend of mine actually told me this once and i have never moved on 

chaddick ships hortrix 😔👏 good for him but wrong universe buddy 

gd i hate it here

reena is my self insert 

this whole fucking chapter is my last two braincells talking to each other during a math test 

chapter six is like a fever dream and i don’t like it, lets move on

my titles authors notes increasingly get more chaotic as the story progresses. chapter seven ‘you all flatter this old woman with your comments, bless you all’  bruh what was i on

nick is such a sweetheart tbh i love him

chaddick=fergie was such a big brain comparison 

i HATE that attack helicopter joke so much i was dreading it 

sorry about chapter eight lemme help you out 

b r u h

i swear this should have been a nineties au 

actually me

i didn’t want to me reminded of the fact that i used to listen to garage rock unironically. but now i am and oh man am i glad someone introduced me to better bands. the song i linked is not as much as a banger as i thought it was back then. 

a woman with taste. ska band coven au? anyone? no? okay. 

I RICKROLLED MYSELF JHSJFHJS WTF I WAS LIKE ‘Oh boy what did i do now” AND KSDJKSHD WHY 

we’re halfway through and i think i’m going to cry this is very accurate to irl groupchats but that doesn’t mean i have to like it 

my jokes peaked here 

chaddick in chapter eleven: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LI4LMWI5o8k

@crackedpepper​ this is for you. i wrote this for you before i even knew you. 

yes, yes he did just type tick tok. 

anyways, i’m gonna stop halfway because i forgot how long this was and i need to recover. part two may be in the making. Have a lovely day. very sorry about this 

overall verdict: being pushed down memory lane in a barrel of nails and awkward jokes