#Incorrect dmc quotes

[vngful]

[ratindividual]

[fictionpiece]

[micha-writes-things]

Late at Night w/ Dante.

Y/N: Dante you don't have to do this.

Dante: It's for the greater good Y/N.

Vergil: *Sleeping peacefully*

Dante: *draws a mustache on Vergil's face*

Y/N: *sighs* He's gonna kill you later.

[mauri2530]

I can see him saying that in the game 😁😂😂

haters opening their mouths

Dante: I should fuck your mom and give them a kid they'll actually love

[alicethenobody]

(Dante and Nero recounting to Vergil their adventure in Fortuna)

Nero: Ugh, that stupid board game was the WORST.

Dante: The what?

Nero: Yknow! That one with the giant die! It took me forever to get past that fucking thing.

Dante: Oh, that? I just sliced it in half.

Nero: You… you what?!

Dante: Yeah, I sliced it in half. And I looked cool doing it.

Nero: (Surprised Pikachu face) You can… you can do that?!

Dante: (Trying to sound cool in front of his nephew) Another pro devil hunting tip, kid: Think outside the box, don’t play by their rules.

Vergil: (Confusion)

[skyeconch]

Y/N : I’ve never met anyone like you

Dante : awww ur too kind

Y/N : like genuinely

Y/N : it’s insane how “different” you are

Y/N : don’t take this the wrong way but I feel like you should have a disorder named after you

[nico-drives-badly]

V: Nero, I owe you my life.

Nero: No thanks, I’ve seen your life and I’m not impressed.

[icequeenoriginal]

Lady: We didn’t even have a proper wedding. We just went down to the courthouse on a Tuesday.

Dante: The judge sentenced me to life, with no chance of parole.

Lady: You begged me to marry you.

Dante: It’s true, I did.

[dante-winning-archive]

Vergil: leave me to do my dark bidding on the internet!

Dante: what are you bidding on?

Vergil: I am bidding on a table.

[vngful]

crying n throwingup

[ratindividual]

[indycaelumskywalker]

Y/n: Looks like we can't mansplain or manipulate ourselves out of this situation?

Dante: How about malewife'ing?

Vergil: Manslaughter it is.

[icycoldninja]

Dmc incorrect quotes

Nero, tearing up the room: Where are they? Nero, looking under a pillow: Who moved them? Who moved my children? Nero: Somebody moved my M&M's, and now I am going to start killing.

Dante: Then either Sonic is a god or could kill god, and I do not care if there is a difference.

V: Why shouldn't you put a toaster in a bathtub full of water? Nero: Because your toast would get soggy!

V: Let’s not Dante this into a worse situation than it already is. Dante: Did you just use my name as a verb?

Dante: Can you pass the salt? V: Can you pass away? Dante: Too much salt.

V: I drink to forget but I always remember. Nero: You're drinking orange juice.

Dante: I got an idea! V: Does it involve breaking the law? Dante: By now don’t you think that’s a given? V: I was just trying to be optimistic. Dante: Don’t bother.

Dante: I'm gonna nickname my child "Lil Bitch". Nero: I see you're passing on your name.

Nero: In my defense, I was left unsupervised. V: Wasn’t Dante with you? Dante: In my defense, I was also left unsupervised.

Nero, Vergil, and Dante are playing poker. Dante is winning by a long shot. Nero: Aw, come on. Vergil: It’s not fair! He doesn't even know what we’re playing! Dante: Go Fish?

Nero, holding an antique bottle: Is this whiskey or perfume? Dante: grabs and chugs the entire bottle Dante: Dante: It's perfume.

Dante: What is wrong with you? Vergil: Many, many things… Vergil: And most of them are your fucking fault.

Dante: I can’t do this, it’s against my moral compass. Nero: YOUR MORAL COMPASS IS A ROULETTE WHEEL! Dante: …Your point?

Nero: I can be your partner for the next race. Vergil: Sorry, Nero. It's a sibling race. Dante: Maybe there's a contest for lonely children after this. Vergil: It's only children, Dante. A lonely child is what you're gonna be when I sell you!

Dante: They called me the B-word. Vergil: Motherfucker doesn’t start with ‘b’.

Nero: If you’re going to suggest I try dropping twenty feet down a pitch dark tower in the hope of hitting a couple of greasy little steps which might not even still be there, you can forget it. Vergil: There is an alternative, then. Nero: Out with it. Vergil: You could drop five hundred feet down a pitch black tower and hit stones which certainly are there.

Vergil: If there’s one thing I learned from Dante, it’s to set people’s expectations real low, so you end up surprising them by practically doing nothing at all.

Nero, cowering in fear: What do you want from me?! Vergil, standing in front of Nero: bites into the whole KitKat bar like a heathen Nero, crying: Please…stop…

[mauri2530]

I read that in Dante's voice 😂

haters opening their mouths

Dante: shit, you're the worst, dysfunctional trash compactor I've ever met

[nothoughtsjustmhaandotherthings]