#In the form of banter

[oldmanlusting]

Ehehe my senior coworker put his hand on my shoulder again today~

[quikyu]

Finally had enough patience to work through all my favorite pokemon XD

If you see anyone near and dear to you... you've got good taste :)c

[sunflowersolace]

i feel like we as a fandom tend to either over uwuify klapollo or over stoicify them and this is by no means a real character analysis or genuine conversation because it is 4am for me and i’m not very good at articulating myself i don’t actually care that much i’m in fandom spaces i’m used to mischaracterising bullshit but

why does it seem to be the only options are “apollo is an actual child and klavier is sexy and suave” or “apollo doesn’t experience emotions and klavier is a cringefail babygirl”. like genuinely can they not both be people.

i feel like a lot of the infantilisng apollo stuff is partially the usual fandom short man = yaoi bottom shit but i’m not gonna sit here and pretend it isn’t also bc of the transmasc apollo headcanon. like it can’t be a coincidence that the most infantilised grown man in the game is also the one that’s most widely headcanoned as ftm. like it feels like a lot of it is your typical uwu short trans uke baby x big strong suave tall hot cis seme and i’m used to that but man it sucks to see people making weird shit about Flustered Virgin apollo getting his first ever kiss from Playboy klavier and. y’all know he’s 25 right? not 15?

there’s also the other side of things where people make klavier into this cringefail babygirl boyfailure who’s hopelessly in love with apollo and spends every waking moment thinking about apollo and can’t do anything without relating it to apollo and apollo just fucking does not like him. and that’s almost worse because at least the first kind of mischaracterisation still feels like a ship. why are we pretending apollo doesn’t care about klavier. he doesn’t like his boy band music but it’s not personal. he still likes klavier.

and then there’s the ones who take one half of the mischaracterising and applies it to both characters. apollo is an uwu baby and klavier is a soyboy and they can’t spend a second apart because they’re so in love. OR they’re both robots who might as well not even be dating with how little they speak to each other.

y’all know you can make them act normal, right? they can be in love with each other and silly about it and also be serious characters? apollo is a dork ass who cracks jokes and is bitchy but he’s also a genuinely smart guy like he’s a lawyer he’s a politician he’s helping rebuild a whole country’s legal system from the ground up and he’s still a bitch and a loser. klavier is ALSO a bitch and a loser and a smart guy. he’s kind, but he’s not a wimp. he’s bitchy but he’s not insufferable. he’s passionate about music and law and everything he talks about. and he says corny shit and openly flirts with apollo but he’s also a damn good prosecutor and id argue he’s the only one who actually understands his job without the defense having to Fix Him tm. and they can both love each other and be all these things.

for a lot of y’all there’s only two options: klavier has trauma (excruciating) (all encompassing) or klavier is silly :3. and like. he can do both. you can acknowledge his trauma and also acknowledge he’s a dumbass who air guitars during court. human beings are multifaceted and fictional characters should reflect that. you gotta make the people you’re writing feel like people yes even the japanese visual novel people.

back to the living each other thing. klavier can openly flirt with apollo and also actually like him. apollo can ignore klavier’s first flirts and still actually like him. maybe he doesn’t wanna get it with the brother of his murderous boss while investigating a crime scene i think that’s reasonable of him. but he also clearly likes and cares about klavier as a person (“i have to pull the darkness out of him” or whatever he says) so just because he didn’t immediately throw himself at klavier the second he hit him with the never felt this way with a man doesn’t mean he’s annoyed by klavier’s flirting it just means it wasn’t the right time. apollo can hate the gavineers shitty music and still love the man who sung it. he can think klavier’s office is ugly and still love him. i don’t love every single thing about the people i love but i still love them. if my qpp made a dog shit song i hated i would tell him bc he and i understand each other.

[choctalksalot]

gotta ask bout jakehal just gotta ahdjjf

oooh oh you've stepped on the Words Button right there

boutta infodump the shit outta this one buckle up mothers and fuckers

love jakehal. top 10 ships that would obliterate dirk strider. concept of them makes me want to stick my head in a microwave. in a good way!! in canon, it's an Oh Man This Will Not End Well to me; jake spends a lot of the plot seeing hal as an annoyance, something dirk uses to blow people off, then as an emotional crutch, and like man that post you made about them? im not sure if i reblogged it yet but i screamed. because yeah. id go fucking apeshit too if i got treated like that. even if hal loves jake, it's kinda fucking hard to just forgive and forget 3 years of belittlement y'know. i think the worst part is he just might.

also a cup and a half of crack is mandatory. i cannot explain why. you cannot take them completely seriously. ever. it's part of what makes them work

if jake for some reason ever pursued hal, a lot of the time it hits me as being a bad attempt at coping. or a rebound situation, which is even worse because haha used like a tool. hah. they need Specific Circumstances to make them end in anything but a pile of burning scrap, the kind that forces them to confront their treatment of each other, and that's 1) hard 2) the first of many, many steps, for both of them. it's not a pretty sight. but it's one i love to see, in either direction [:

and then, turnabout jakehal. now that changes the fucking game.

i needed to make a bingo specifically for them because hoooh man turnabout jakehal. ho man. y'know there just something about being stuck on a ship for 3 years with the autoresponder of your best friend who you've recently been forced to acknowledge is a person that originated from said best friend, one that you may have been treating pretty shittily. and you can't run away from that. im aware im mostly focusing on jake's pov here but that's because i genuinely sobbed the last time i tried to think too hard about hal and im trying to stay coherent here

i keep a very specific scene of them in my head: sitting on top of the ship, looking at the infinite timelines whizzing by, and just. talking. about this. about hal being dirk's autoresponder. about whether jake just sees him as a shittier, less real version of dirk. about what hal's deal with jake is in the first place. i think about them. awkward kids working it out. they drive me nuts. i love this au, i love them :DD

[ansburg]

astarion says he'll take karlach to the upper city parks in baldur's gate bc she hasn't seen them before ....... 🧎🏻

[skibasyndrome]

the way I set out to write a short smutty fanfic bcs reasons, and now I'm 5 k words in and we've only had glances and ~longing~ and my attempt at ~flirty banter~ so far and none of the Goods (TM)?? 💀 who AM I and what happened to the guy who in october was convinced that he could only ever write a maximum of 2k words for a fic?

[tansyuduri]

*Sprays merlin and Arthur with a spray bottle*

[macaroni-stars]

Watching clone wars once again. All is fine. I am fine. And my parents are definetely not getting split up.

[fischiee]

carwash sibs is OVER make way for mainelina sibs

[pursuitseternal]

“Unchained” and longing for freedom… Update to “Tamed by Light” sneaking up on you…

Chapter 5 Unchained: brought before Thingol and Melian, Sauron must account for the last few instances of his “good boy” behavior, hoping it’s enough to gain a little trust … and a little freedom in Doriath.

Saurondriel | Explicit | 4K Chapter

CW: none but cute Woofron, banter, wolf piss, and some rising sexual tension

From Chapter 5:

Sauron shrugged, tugging on that chain enough to catch the elf’s attention. “She came on to me first, in fairness,” he let all his arrogant swagger lilt his voice. And just as Sauron watched Celeborn’s black boot wind up for a good swift kick… good, he thought, self defense was always a good excuse for an accidental mauling…

But a sharp command sliced through the air just before that boot took swing: “Celeborn!” Galadriel strode forward down the path. “You harm one hair on his body, and by Eru, I will do the same to you.”

She snatched the lead from his hands, easing the chain out and kneeling into the dirt to be sure the iron collar around Sauron’s throat was not too tight. “You poor thing,” she cooed and watched his tail beat in the dusty path behind him. Her fingers scratched at his neck, petting between his ears, and constantly ignoring the irksome complaints Celeborn insisted on sharing.

“It isn’t safe… isn’t prudent….” the elf lord whined.

But Galadriel only ignored him, opting to whisper in Sauron’s ear as she stroked its softness instead. “I’ve already told Thingol and Melian about how you almost gave yourself to spare me. Just so you know, King Thingol is rather cross. But he’s always cross when it comes to anyone wrapped up in this Quest for the Silmaril business. However, Queen Melian is eager to believe you’ve found your way back into some redemption.” She pulled away, meeting Sauron’s orange eyes as she fluffed his fur to make him presentable. “Not only does she remember you from before, but she sure had some interesting tales to tell about her brother Maia…” her lips quirked, her eyes bright with teasing, “…Mairon, was it?”

She watched as his smile turned wolfish, his brow line arching in intrigue. “You seem rather curious about me other than when I’m in a form that you can snuggle and pet, Galadriel… Any other questions you’re dying to ask me about my Maia form? The color of my hair, the prominence of my…”

She shoved him hard in the chest, but her smile was rueful and playful all at once.

“I was going to say nose, Princess,” he huffed. “Don’t think such dirty thoughts.”

Again, thanks to @marimosalad for the amaaaazing fanart I will never stop using for this fic 🥲

[chesacakeripper]

Still thinking about the interaction I had over the weekend (where there was genuine right wing unrest in my city waheyy) where I popped a message onto my colleagues-but-we're-friends-we-go-for-drinks-and-dinner-sonetimes chat to make sure ppl were staying safe (many of us are of various minority groups) and I get a bit salty about how the police were mostly being shit and harassing the counter-protestors and one person pipes up with 'I don't subscribe to the acab thing sorry 😂' after talking about how many police were injured in other unrest and like.

I had to fully disengage myself because I work with and am friendly with these folks but sometimes you get smacked in the head with an opinion and suddenly lose the trust and respect you'd been building for someone over the last year huh

[neonpaperlanterns]

Spoiler warning. this story request will spoil something you can find after you do the last deal with Fox.

If you do the Foxs' last deal and then look around Rataus' home. You should find a scrapped letter he wanted to send to the Lamb. I'll put it below word for word in the case you don't want to lose Ratau, otherwise. Feel free to just ignore it if you want to find the letter on your own.

"I have tried many times to write this letter to you, only to find myself unable to express what I wish to say. Likely I will scrap this as well and toss it on the growing pile of failed attempts. But still I try. Whilst teaching you, I have begun to think of you as... well, I hope you could think of me as... You are already better than I ever was. I know you will not make the same mistakes I did. I am proud of you. Your dear friend and mentor, Ratau."

*ahem* so yea. I found this out myself and wish to offer a little story request. Ratau seems to see Lamb as his child (the letter implies it, I think.) along with the way his buddies talk about him. Being loved by all and being true to who he was despite being a Vessel. I think Ratau failed. Because he was too soft. Couldn't bring himself to kill in his gods' name. Couldn't bring himself to... sacrifice... in his gods' name. The only real reason why he is the last surviving vessel (that I know of.) is because he literally, never died in the name of his god. Nor did he ever crusaded. He was essentially just a camp dad tending to the possibly few followers he could get in TowWs' name. So, this story is just a request to have Ratau slip up one day during a knucklebones "tournament". Maybe Lamb finds these scrapped letters while fetching refreshments. Maybe Ratau slips up and refers to Lamb as his child.

Maybe Lamb is the one to slip up and refer to Ratau as dad.

As odd as their relationship is... (and as short as the tutorial is.) Rat dad deserves some wholesome love. So, yea. Please make a story regarding Rat Dad and Lambert.

-Sunny Anon. ps. Answering the A/N in your "The Doorman" story; I'd rather be in Poppy world. That's not my neighbor! would def have me be a meal sooner or later while in the world of Poppy Playtime... Idk, I think I'd have a bigger chance. I'm not the greatest at faces so a double would for sure find me easy prey if they got their disguise just right enough.

[A/n: Shrumy makes me feel competitive. Is this wholesome?]

No more stupid bets

Pushing the door open to the shack the Lamb was hit with the heavy scent of tobacco, the sound of clinking glass, and dice rolling against wood.

"Ah you've arrived." Ratau was quick to greet them. Shuffling them along until they were standing next to Shrumy. The old crusty shellback didn't even acknowledge them.

The Lamb was sure to garner the turtle's attention when they cleaned out his pockets.

"If only we still played for parts. I'd have your other hand Klunko." Shrumy hissed as he dragged his winnings towards him. The crow made a dejected sound as Bop wiggled in a way that seemed offensive.

"I'll play you for parts." Lamb interjected. Gaze innocently wide as they peered over the table. The room went silent as the group stared at them and then the haggard turtle was letting out a wheeze laugh.

"Deal little crown barer." Shrumy took the knife from his side and pointed it at them. "When I win I'm going to carve out one of those eyes." The tip of the blade reflected in the Lamb's right eye. They could feel the crown shift as it twined around their arm until a dagger was held firmly in the palm of their hand.

"When I win I'll slice off your tongue." The Lamb let the side of the blade rest against Shrumy's mouth. A sudden hand was being placed on their shoulder and Ratau was dragging them away. The rat led them outside muttering the entire time.

"Foolish." He stated.

"Are you without sense?" Ratau waved his staff around.

"I do not care how confident you are no child of mine will be tempting something so moronic." Lamb blinked owlishly as Ratau continued to rant and worry. A feeling that they cannot remember the last time they felt stirred at the back of their mind. Their nose twitched as a pressure began to build behind their eyes. Burring their chin in their fleece the Lamb let out a quiet cough.

"If it bothers you that much I wont. You have to tell Shrumy he wont be losing his tongue though." Lamb heard Ratau give an exasperated sigh.

'Fine, fine." Lamb followed behind Ratau, listening to his grumblings about the things he does.

[renmackree]

Am I craving to write a pirate AU?

Am I wanting to write a regency era AU?

Am I pining to write an apocalypse AU ?

The answer is yes.

[x-0h-m3-0h-my]

i want to learn to crochet and/or knit but My Wrists .

[hobgoblinns]

thoschei moots i NEED to talk to someone about the war master/tenth doctor audio. i’m actually going insane

[dwtdog]

no they are more suited for random adventures then sitting and planning what to say i think especially snf. but i only liked it because snf and george genuinely tried but karl did not want to try to make it work. but yeah it feels like the start of 2023 was hundreds of years ago at this point. it was badly formatted though i will say i liked that we seen more of snf only good part of it

-🐓🌌

yeah i just think the dynamic the three of them have isn't really suited to just sitting down and talking 😭 not even that they would all just cut each other off all the time but also they could never stay on track and they made all the episodes so short ??? and they sucked as interviewers lol😭