#If only I could have seen him with moonlight falling on him AHHHH

[lys-lilac]

So I came to know posting screenshots is valid?

HOW CAN I LET THIS OPPURTUNITY SKIP?

[torbeen]

Nodding off…

(From @mead-and-a-bullet , I just couldn’t change which blog I was sending it from!)

‘How could she fall asleep here of all places?’ Torben pondered, brown eyes but the only thing unobscured from beneath the fading strip of crimson cloth around his face. That took a bravery he could only marvel at. Tonight it was worn more for warmth than anything else, for what other living soul would happen upon here in the heart of Duskwood, hidden beneath the canopy of the gnarled branches that not even the sun or moonlight found itself bold enough to penetrate in entirety. The most one could hope for was a gloom during the day, and a darkness that was only black enough to swallow others, not oneself. 

Their watch on the road leading to the bridge that spanned the river into Westfall was a lonely one, but essential, it was said. To leave the cobblestone vein into the heart of Defias territory unwatched was a crime too great for even the Brotherhood to perpetuate. So it was that two had been dispatched, their vigil a shallow rise of the earth beneath a tree that cast them in all but total darkness, yet offered an unrivaled view of the road itself. 

Nobody could avoid being seen, nor heard, who traveled this road. They would have eyes upon them the moment they came into view and those eyes would not leave them until they were swallowed by the darkness again. Unless they were foolish, or brave, enough to have a torch.

Ahhhh but to have light in the heart of darkness was to carry a shard of the sun itself. Alas, Torben and his companion lacked either such foolishness, brazenness or were of a cosmic being that could carry the light of creation itself. So they sat, shoulder to shoulder for warmth as the Autumn steadily marched on and the summer beat a hasty retreat, giving way for chill to send it’s unseen banners swirling the air about them, carrying stray leaves through the air and scraping across the cobblestone path to shatter the relative silence.

‘She sleeps so silently.’ Torben remarked again to himself, a smirk reaching the corners of his eyes. It bemused him, certainly. That the woman who was bold enough to cause a storm with claps of her fist against her brother’s jaw and flashes of strikes against the finest Stormwind had to offer, could sleep so peacefully.

Torben hadn’t even known she dozed off until her head was resting on his shoulder, the reflex in him to shrug her off lingering, the urge to mask the true feelings of such a moment beneath an amused reprimand about falling asleep on watch lingered…but were carried away by that same autumn wind with the falling leaves. 

Let her sleep, Torben thought. How often was it that any of them found themselves lucky enough to capture the treasure of rest in their grasp? He would not pry such a trinket from her grasp. So that smirk of his lingered as he pulled at the knot that held his cloak in place to free it. Shifting, gentle enough to not wake her, and draped it over her as if it were a blanket. 

By then, it had melted into a genuine smile. One that was swallowed by the darkness as all else was tonight.

@mead-and-a-bullet

[butterfliesinmyguts]

rest easy

summary: you save guts

warning: blood and violence( its berserk), virgin reader, angst, and smut

your days were spent alone, only few a visitors pass by your cottage mostly lost travelers. you tended to your farm, horse, and went into the village every once in a while to gather supplies but it was unsafe now and days. you couldn’t ever get visitors.

on this night, you were heading back from the village deciding to take a short cut threw the forest as the rain started to slowly fall. your boots helped against the mud and you applaud yourself for not wearing a dress. pulling your hood over you head your pressed on, as the rain pour even more.

thunder clapped along the sky and it was getting a little harder to see the trail. stop for a second you leaned brush the mud of the rocks to see it was straight for here to your cottage.

wiping off the mud on a branch, while your ears filled with a loud roar. your eyes widen, as your feet dragged you towards it. groans and loud cracking echo there the forest. maybe someone hurt, something clicked in you. who ever it was they need help.

“ who goes there!” you shouted, a sorry attempt to place fear in the sound you feared.

“ ugrhhhhhhhh!” the creature howled, your body frozen in pure terror. the things body was blob with a a abnormal human body attach like .. like it was it face but the eyes were above the body, I grew nauseous.

the tall creature eyes were fixed on a wounded man who was on laying against the dirt “ silly of you to think you could win!” his hand pressed on his lower stomach, looking at the mans face he had no far just a blank expression with blood and dirt covering his tight chin.

as the creature slowly approached him- i thought quickly- I had to do something , I couldn’t just stand by and watch this happen. bending down patting the soggy ground not letting my eyes of the monster as my fingers tips grabbed a hand full of rocks. I knew for sure if chucked the matter at the dam thing and stayed where I was creature it quickly find me in tear me apart, I had to be smart about this.

the man body was inches away from a large tree, if I could throw the rocks and make it over there before the rocks hit the creature body i could survive. convenicing myself I watched the man turn looking over at this huge blade his face contorted yet focus on the object- what is hold did that have to him?

as the creature stood closer to him - your hand fling the rocks at the things whist your feet twisted to keep from slip it lead you to make a break behind the tree and then infront of the man. “ are you okay?” drop your knees to the wet ground your eyes wondered the mans body as he looked surprised at your presences, the man was handsome to say the least, he would have saw the warm tint of cheeks if it wasn’t for the cold rain.

my questions were answers his palm lifted slightly of the wound to display blood. he had a deep gush, pushing back his hand applied pressure again as I turned.

a loud screech rumble through the forest followed by thunder as the creature turned in angry crawling towards were I just left trying to find out we’re the rocks came from- he tore through the trees- I eyeballed the thing. that could of be you. the monster was extremely strong, this would be your only time to put it down.

the man notice you as cover his body was yours, the smell of blood and sweat made way through your norstils as his filled with lavender and mint, the man behind whined in pain as he tried pushing himself up guts knew he had to do. you rejected his actions slowly pushing him down but his shoulders. the man watched you perplexed, what is she doing?“ I’ll protect you I promise...” his eyes widen as your trembling begun searching around as you found a long sword the he was looking at it.

weakly you stood up with the sword in hand, stepping back you sunk you heel in the ground pulling the blade up. you grunted as result, finally getting a good grip you aimmed behind the creature as he still tore. the man watched you in awh as he question who you are, you had to be lms of the kingdom swordsman but he hadn’t seen you before.

the heavy sword pulling you down, but you refused to let you go. the man cough concern you leading to the turning of your head“ please I ...” sniffing he picked his head up “ I’ve got this run fast..” shaking your head no at the man. You had to protect him, that was what you said you had to stay true to your word.

finally your arms got used to the weight blade, You knew it wouldn’t be long before your muscle give out so you aimmed toward the distracted creature. “ AHHHH” you cried charging toward the thing who finally turning to you but it was too late.

stabbing the creature, “ you bitch!” it spat at you, cover your body with blood in. throwing your head back in disgust you shoved the blade all the way through letting go finally killing the thing as you fell on your knees to the ground.

turning to the man, he was stunned, pushing his body against the tree to push himself up. he was surprise that you could even lift his sword but killing the dam thing! out of the question.

picking herself up of the ground, he watched her run towards him. the women was beautiful, her shirt ripped and her face covered in dripping blood- but still wore the look of worry on her face. “ let me help you, my home is just this way...” nodding she allowed him to leaned my body against hers.

“wait...” guts breathe as he bent down pulling the blade with ease out of the creatures body placing the sword on his back.

leaning against the woman he realized he hasn’t even said his name, “guts..” his deep voice vibrated. you looked up towards the man, “ my name is guts, yours?” he claimed as you both finally step into a clearing leaving the dark forest. the women lead guts toward her home replying with “y/n, it’s nice to meet you.” the rain finally slowly down only drizzling on the top of you.

walking through the opening of glossy grass a small cottage was pointed out by the bright moonlight. “thank you for that..”

“ that? I saved your ass..” guts hands held her sides letting a nice squeeze to them almost making her laugh. “ thank you for saving my ass”

you were extremely proud of yourself, when you were younger your brothers taught you how to wield a sword and fight to defend yourself. 

leading guts in you, you placed him on the ground on one of the rugs you just finished. now it’ll be covered in blood but you had no worries about that. getting up you ran to the outside getting a bucket of water and placing it on the fire place. grabbing your clothes and sewing kit.

guts groaned a bit, as he discarded his armor. rushing to his side you begun to clean him off and sewing him up. guts watched you tend to his wounds, you made sure to take care of injured spot.

he knew there was only so much you could do but he’d appreciated everything you did. finish your sewing, you patted him off with the warm towel. y/n knew one of his ribs were at least cracked due to the bruising, but guts still moved around like it was nothing lifting him self up and everything. this told you that it wasn’t his first time fight against something like this.

“ thank you...” nodding standing up stretching your limbs. turning you looked out your window the rain finally stop, but you finally saw your reflection of dirt and dried blood on you body. you need to clean yourself, “ you can lay your head here tonight...” a smirked played on his lips, realizing how forward and a bit inappropriate that sounded you stumbled saying“ o..oh only if you like” guts rose towering over you, finally getting a good look at him. his was extremely ripped, raven colored hair laid against his scalp and presence made you feel like a was a teenage girl with a crush. guts was nothing but handsome.

you didn’t realize his stare towards you as your eyes wonder his body, you stumbled backwards tripping over bunched up rug. Guts didn’t let you let you fall, as you as met his watching him warp his arms around you- hands planted flat against your back . the corners of his mouth quirked up as his eyes instantly fell to your lips, “ don’t fall” he murmured. breathing out, you pulled back nodding and apologizing.

Guts smiled at the fact that he made your this flustered, you turned grabbing a towel. “ I’m going to bathe, I’ll make you one too... please ea-t your welcome to anything...”

you wondered off, as he dropped his things, looking around your cottage it was full of greerny, candles all around lit the room but the large arch window allow the moonlight to shine in, and your bedroom was on top of garret with only could be reached by a ladder.

you had rugs over the wooden floor and paintings that covering the wall with some unfinished, is this how you made your money? leaning on the window seal he saw your crops. how could so much be done by one person, and from the looks of it she lives all alone. turning he say a sliver man armor in the corner, mhm maybe she doesn’t.

after eating most of your bread and fruit you had out- gut heard you called out and told him the bathe was filled again letting him know you were all done. you opposed no threat, not one at all. you laid your life down for him, it made him fair you even than your stunning looks. he felt comfortable around you-you risk your life for him.

guts watched from the door frames as you tended to your night gown in the mirror, you looked beautiful.

“I’m here..” guts broed body stepped into the wash room- you had on a dress with a loose corset bra on, you skin was glowing in the candle lit room. “already for ya...” you watched as guts go towards the bath as the steam from the bath covered the room, pulling down his pants down you turned your body. does this man have no shame? closing your eyes you hand gripped the door knob, “my apologies, I’ll leave y-“

quickly silencing her guts look behind him to you, “ I’ll need help, do ya mind?” he watch you slowly opening your eyes to him, you quickly nodded. making your way to find a small towel and pulled the stool behind him.

guts placed his feet in the wooden tub trying to get used to the warm water as he slowly set, you turned away you waited until his lower was in the water as guts let out a sigh.

your eyes studied his scar fulled back. your fingers tips traced them, getting lost in them it was almost like a puzzle. guts felt your innocent touches and relaxed, letting his head fell between his shoulders. “ so is there another bed?” shaking your head gaining focus again grabbing the towel, “ no, I stay alone I hope you don’t mind sharing..” your heart skipped a beat at the thought of the warm feeling of other by your side. “no I was confused on if you laid alone...”

blushing a bit you, started washing back and then turning to face him to wash his chest with warm towel. guts observed you again as focus deeply on your task at hand. biting your lips you spoke again “ my brother died two winters ago, so I keep to myself..”

that answer his question, “ I’m sorry fo-“ her finger hushed him while she placed the on his lips, “ don’t apologize...” you said seriously- all guts could do nodded, as she started at his neck with the cloth. “you just getting to know me, what about you? “

guts felt warm, staring at you he spoke with a “complicated “ looking at him for a moment until you could help but to bust out in laughter. guts rolled his eyes, “what?” you sighed, “ you were so serious you just look a little funny”

guts watched her giggled to herself, at least she didn’t beg on. compared to others she’s seen way more, and she’s calm. y/n is laughing, watching her eyes closed and she talked about how she planned on cleaning the blood stained rug and went on about the monster outside and how heavy my sword was. “ you know I could have saved myself?” guts looked up, making her roll her eyes. “ then clean your own body baby..” she sit up beginning to walked away.

“Ah!” guts gasped as you turned back to him in worry, “did a cut open?”she leaned in and earned as splash of water on her, “ hey!” she questioned guts, “ you just looked funny”

after guts finished you give him some dry clothes with a cup of tea. you give him an explanation about the crops, “I wake up everyday at five in the morning...” that was crazy to him. you guys climbed up into you bed, guts set up looking out the window.

resting your head on the pillow you watched him. guts was tense, like he was worried. reach out for his hand he flinched. confirming your thoughts, his eyes watched you as your hand pulled him down to you. “ I promise your safe here...”

guts watched you, letting his head finally rest. after what it felt like years. eyes watching you, brush his hair from his eyes. “ you don’t have to worry..” giving him a hazy smile. guts heart throbbed pulling you into him.

for a moment you let your eyes fall and pressed deeper into him. savoring this moment, chest pressed together guts felt your heartbeat. it was a slow thump, letting him know you were relaxed. his hand smoothed along your curves petting you.

you body buzzed, while your palms instinctively went behind his neck. grabbing your waist he pulled you closer to him, I moan slipped pass you lips. you’ve never had this happen, guts watched you as his hips grinded against yours. your eye closed and mouth ajar along his lips in pure pleasure that you’ve never felt before. thinking of the times you rocked against your pillow, having his hands and the musk of him around your was completely different. guts lips touch your cheek as you quickly pulled back.

guts confused and extremely turned on by the sounds you made in his ear- glazed at your in worry. “ I’m sorrry..” you mumbled holding yourself, you felt almost embarrassed and weak. you haven’t been-

“ no one ever made me feel like this before..” looking guts eye widen.“ it’s your first time?” he asked you, you didn’t want to answer but guts could see in your movements, your were awkwardly nervous, and your corset squeeze against your chest due to your tight breathe.

guts eyes darted to your bust, licking his lips. He thought about this situation in front of him, slowly guts arms found your hips pulling you on top of him.

your hands laid flat again this chest looking down, you didn’t know how to feel nor what to do. guts stared watching your lips quiver, his fingers worked on your the strings on your back with eventually let your top fall.

his hands discarded it as he planted soft kisses on your skin. leading up to your lips, starting off soft you two made out until you craved more. lifting your hips up and sitting them down on his.

guts large hands reached under your dress to your bare soft thighs. squeezing them you bounced, pulling away to look down. “ I wanna- ah- watch ” your hands swiftly bunched up your skirt at your waist making guts smile. As his this slowly brushed past your heat, “ that fe-ahh so good” you moaned resting your head on his shoulder.

guts cock throb, stunned from the words that just left your mouth. pushing deeper gut thumb became cover in your juices, you were dripping for him. “ oh guts!” you moaned into his ear, his thumb continue to move against your ball of nerves as his finger starting pushing against your opening.

gasping your pulled back a little, guts hand kept you still and held you there. you never felt that pressure before and it sting a little, “ sorry it just came as a surprise..” guts nodded, pressing is lips against yours again, His thumb so moved against you as your lips molded together- he pulled back breathless “ we don’t have rush okay?”

desperate for his lips again you moved again them, nodding not even needing to convince yourself. guts slowly pushed his finger inside you, hearing the slick sounds as he twist and turn his finger made it hard to go move against his finger. a loud moan left lips, while you held on top him tight.

you never wanted this to stop, laying you down softly as his hand on your back went to soothe the warmth on your cheeks, you were expose to him.

guts took your beautiful body in, as his hands showed appreciation to every part of your body. his lips kisses you stomach and then your hips. making his way to your breast that he knead, earning a moan from him, squeezing your legs against his body he felt his member jump.

guts faced you, “ this is an honor...” kissing you again, you feel him pushing into you. your lips part opening up more as he sucked on your bottom lip. his large hands held you thighs as the burning slowly went away, as guts groaned started to rock move his waist as yours.

You gasped in astonishment pawing at guts back. guts drive into you, your left perfect around him. your pussy hugged him tighter than ever, begging - pleading for more of him.

his was in a complete trance by y/n, your moans were music to his ears “ oh guts!” only pressed him to want more of you.

you had mixed emotions, you told yourself that you would never marry off to keep your family name. So expected to never have this intimate moment with anyone, to never experience this moment . but now that you are it felt so right and you never wanted to stop.

“ holy shit your tight..” lips roughly pressed at your skin, you were in heaven. your body felt so good, placing your hands on his sides you dug your nails in pleading for him to go faster.

“ ugh! “ your legs wrapped around his body pulling him deeper inside of you awakening a bundle of ecstasy. guts saw you were a messy, words left your mouth in pants as you body shaked. flickering down to his cock he saw you milking him, you were experiencing your first orgasm and it was all from him.

lips falling on your neck, he drove deeper insane you wanting more as your hands gripped his hair. “ oh god!” you were in a frenzy, a guts frenzy.

pulling back guts watch you release for him, his hands clenched the sheet to hold his in. the site of you, was just enough for him.

as soon as you notice guts stop his movements you hips rode against earning a deep sigh from him. “ more!” you cried, guts gocked letting his head fall, as you pushed him deeper. You were so desperate for him, you were intoxicated by him. kissing him more your felt a spark, tingle your lips as guts pulled away groaning.

“ahh y/n fuck!” guts cried releasing inside you as he buried his inside you making you whimper in his ear, hold his head in your arms. guts screwed up his face, thrust more inside you. his cum all going deeper in you, as your pushed his hair out of his face.

kissing you deeper, you both felt enchanted by each other by each other, panting into each other guts gazed at you telling you that your amazing making you feel all warm inside.

laying his head on your bare chest he fell into a deep well needed sleep. your fingers ran through his hair as you replayed the recently events.

as the morning came you routine begun, guts still sound asleep- well not sound you could hear his snores even as you tended to your crop. you took it upon yourself to pack him fruits and berries in around cloth that smelt just like you.

fixing yourself, you changed into a dress passing your ankles. your corset tight, as you heard a stir. looking up upon your loft guts body was cleaved, his abs laided tight on his chest as he rubbed his eyes sleepily. looking down on your he almost gasped, you were breath taking as you smiled at him.

you were glowing, slowly climbing up the ladder Sitting on your knees in front of him. “good morning sleeping beauty..” chuckling he connected your lips, as your hand placed on his shoulder pulling of with a smile.

guts fingers found your hair twirling around his fingers, “ when do you plan on heading off?” guts smirked placing his hand behind your neck using his thumb to rub your temple. his lips take hold of you again while you threw you on top of him.

your lips dancing together as you playful caressed his body. guts hips pushed against you making you pulling back to lean up. “ what are you doing?” his snaked up to your hips as he slowly brushed his cock against you. eyes fluttering as you whimpered. guts smiled, flipping you over so he was on top. placing your hands on his chest, your face turned to the side.

did I do something wrong, guts eyebrow quirked as he turned down. “ we can’t do this right now, we gotta get you all packed..” as you continued to rumble you tried to ignore how guts kissed trail lower and lower down your body- his hands push your dress up as he placed a kiss on your heat. “so much to d - ah guts !”

after loud screams and heavy rocking for half of the day guts smiled at you, lips parted and eyes closed. brushing your cheeks he was enchanted by you.

guts had to get back, it’s been weeks since he’s been home. come to think of it, he’s never seen this place. a clear meadow and even this cottage, he always takes this way home. plus why didn’t anything attack this place last night? that was the first quiet night guts. you eyes opened, smile beaming at him.

“ let’s get you going before sunset..” nodding slowly while she peck his lips and stood up to fix herself. guts found his items neatly cleans and organized, while he dressed himself you handed him a bag with food.

he sighed grabbing his things walking with him in silence until you reach the middle of your meadow. turning to you guys frown a bit. hand on his cheek you smiled towards him, “ don’t forget about me..” shaking his head no, never. you nodded in response.

“ thank you, I owe you one..”

“you owe me a lot...” guts smirked played along his rough face, “ I’m in debt eternally...” the wind swayed the grass along both of your feet’s. it was finally quiet for once. guts two fingers hooked under your chin pulling your closer.

his face studied yours, he found you almost angelic. guts couldn’t believe he just had stumbled upon something so mesmerizing. pressing his lips against yours one last time, pulling away leaving you purely enchanted.

guts swore he’d come back to you but when he came back he couldn’t find you. guts found the clearing, but there was no cottage not crops no trace of nothing like it was never there- like she was never there.

author notes:

I just started berserk and I’m falling deeply in love with the it.

* proofing reading in progress *

[blueskrugs]

Tim McGraw | Brock Boeser

ahhhh! this is the first fic of the swift series! I can’t believe I am actually going to try and pull this off for the next five months. I hope you guys like it and big shoutout to @broadstbroskis for being my sounding board throughout all this fic planning and then beta-ing this!

length: 1.6k words

But when you think Tim McGraw,  I hope you think my favorite song

Falling in love with Brock was easy. 

It was the summer before your sophomore year of college, on the precipice of both your lives changing, though neither of you knew it at the time. 

Time seemed to move slower that summer, long sunny days blending into bonfire nights out by the lake, September nothing more than a distant day on the calendar. You watched as Brock’s hair turned more blond and his shoulders turned more tan, hours outside in the sun doing their job. 

You remembered the first time Brock kissed you; you weren’t sure it was something you’d ever forget. You’d spent weeks dancing around each other, learning each other, had spent an entire Fourth of July party practically glued to each other’s sides. It seemed more than inevitable by the time it finally happened.

He called you late one night, woke you up and begged you to meet him down at the lakefront. You went, because of course you did, met him down at the dock, where he was waiting with a pile of blankets in the speedboat his family used. He tossed you one of his UND hoodies with a grin before helping you onto the boat. You settled into the nest of blankets in the prow as Brock carefully steered the boat out from the dock and into the middle of the lake. 

It was a clear night, the stars and the full moon shining brightly against the still, dark lake, and a quiet one. The only sounds filling the air were the quiet hum of the boat’s motor and Brock’s country playlist playing quietly from his phone, neither quite loud enough to drown out the constant buzz of the cicadas. 

Brock cut the motor and came to sit behind you. You rested your head on his chest as he wrapped his arms around your waist. He was warm and solid behind you, and you were both quiet for a moment, just listening to the music.

“This is one of my favorite songs,” you murmured, as Tim McGraw’s “Humble and Kind” started filtering through the speakers.

“I know,” Brock said simply. You didn’t remember telling him that. You could hear his heartbeat beneath your ear, steady and calm. 

You were caught up in trying to remember when you’d told Brock your favorite song when he shifted a little behind you. You twisted in his arms to see what was the matter, but then he was kissing you, softly in the moonlight, and you didn’t get the chance.

“Wanted to do that for a while,” he admitted after he pulled away, resting his forehead against yours. His breath fanned across your face when he breathed out a sigh. Tim McGraw was still playing somewhere behind you.

“I would’ve let you,” you said back.

Brock breathed out a laugh and kissed you again, one hand tangled in your hair, the other still wrapped around your waist.

And I was right there beside him all summer long,  And then the time we woke up to find that summer gone

For all that that summer seemed endless while it was happening, it ended abruptly, shattering the peaceful love you and Brock had been building out on the lake. 

You snuck out one last time, both of you dressed in something other than a swimsuit for once, spent the night in each other’s arms with your bare feet dangling in the lake off the dock, the stars and the moon lighting your way once again.

You weren’t sure you’d ever look at the summer stars the same way when you were older.

Brock went back to UND. Your family moved away from Minnesota. Summer romances were never meant to last, you told yourself, as you left yours in the dust.

Brock promised he would keep in touch, pressed a green UND hoodie into your hands and a goodbye kiss to your lips. You smiled at him, because you knew it would never last, and it didn’t. Brock had other things to focus on, hockey and his future. It was only a matter of time until he forgot you. 

You spent a lot of time wearing that hoodie he gave you in the beginning, more time than you cared to admit. You spent more time crying than you cared to admit, too. You kept wearing it long after it stopped smelling like Brock and summer, until it was almost nothing to you and the comfort of it was gone. Almost.

Brock’s texts trickled to a stop before Christmas, but you couldn’t blame him. You’d always had a feeling that this– whatever this had been– had meant more to you than it had to him.

You couldn’t bring yourself to stop following him, though, not even when your friends and family gave you pitying looks, not when UND got booted out of the championship tournament. “He’s just a boy,” they’d say, but they also say you never forget your first love, don’t they? You watched his first NHL game, at home in Minnesota, his first NHL goal, too. And if you cried a little, well, at least there was no else around to see it. 

Years passed, and, slowly, you moved on. Brock’s sweatshirt made its way to the back of your closet. You fell in love again, fell out of love. Stopped loving Brock. You graduated college. You never did go back to the lake, wondered if Brock ever had. If he’d waited for you, or if he’d moved in and found another girl to spend the summer with. For the most part, you forgot about Brock. Forgot about his laugh, about the way he’d roll his eyes when you teased him. How he knew your favorite songs. You did your best to, at least. It was easier said than done for a long time.

But in a box beneath my bed, there’s a letter that you never read from three summers back It’s hard not to find it all a little bittersweet...

You were cleaning out your old bedroom at your parents’ house when you found it. It was a letter you’d written to Brock after that summer, when you were confused and lonely, filled with all the things that you didn’t have the courage to say to his face. It was in an envelope, addressed and stamped, but you’d never planned on sending it. In all the chaos of moving that fall, it had gotten thrown in a box and shoved under your bed to be forgotten. 

You remembered every word you’d written, but you carefully pulled it out anyway. You read that letter again and again over the next few days, always pausing on the last words you wrote before you signed your name: “I love you.”

It was another several days before you pulled out a clean sheet of paper and a pen, wrote a continuation to that letter. You’d loved Brock once, yes, but you didn’t anymore, not in the same way. There were no tears left in this story. He’d always be your first love, and you’d always want the best for him. You just no longer felt your heart break every time you thought of him, and you hadn’t for a long time. 

You hoped that he was happy out there in Vancouver, living his dream.

And there’s a letter left on your doorstep, And the first thing that you’ll read...

“Brock, there’s a letter for you!��� his mom called through the house.

“Who sends letters anymore?” he asked, which earned him a smack with the envelope. He took it from his mom anyway. The return address was unfamiliar, out-of-state, and there was no name, but he felt like he’d seen the handwriting somewhere before. He took the envelope out on the back deck with Coolie, carefully slid his thumb under the flap and opened it.

A picture slid out from in-between two folded pieces of paper when he tugged them out. It took only a quick glance at it to tell him exactly who had sent him this letter. It was a picture of the two of you at that Fourth of July party you’d spent together all those summers ago. Brock had spent the entire day trying not to kiss you right there in front of everyone.

Brock smiled at the picture for a moment. His arms were wrapped around your shoulders, your hands reaching up to grasp his. You were both laughing at some joke long forgotten. He didn’t even remember anyone taking the picture. He carefully set it aside to turn his attention to the letter. He read in silence as the afternoon sun slowly dipped lower in the sky. Coolie was off somewhere in the grass, having found a stick to chew on.

Brock read the letter, then again. He stared at your name on the bottom of each page for a minute before carefully refolding them. He whistled once for Coolie, who came running, still carrying the stick. 

“Where are you off to?” his mom asked as he made his way back into the house and grabbed his car keys.

“For a drive.”

When you think Tim McGraw, I hope you think of me

The letter was tossed in his glovebox. Brock plugged in his aux, pulled up Spotify, and scrolled all the way down to his country playlist. There was a song on there he didn’t listen to very often, could never really explain why he always skipped it, but right now he clicked on it and turned the volume up.

“Always stay humble and kind,” sang Tim McGraw as he put his car and drive and allowed himself to remember, just this once.

[kumeko]

A/N: For the Butterfly Estate Zine! Spoilers for later events in the manga, for anime-onlys.

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…

…

Shinobu pressed her fingers against the coin, feeling the imprint of the hard edges on her skin. Even in the warm, spring sunlight, the metal felt cold. “Kanae gave this to you, right?” she asked, idly turning it over on her palm.

 Standing next to her, Kanao nodded her head slowly. “To help me decide,” she explained, a fond smile on her face. There was a hint of sorrow in her expression, something Shinobu saw in the mirror whenever she thought of her sister. It was less than it was yesterday, less than it was a year ago, and while it would be ever present, the pain had eased.

 Shinobu glanced at her younger sister. A chill breeze blew through, ruffling her hair and the butterfly clasp keeping her locks together. Would she wear a second one, when Shinobu died? A memento from both sisters? Swallowing down the lump in her throat, Shinobu closed her hand around the coin. “Despite how she acted, she always knew what to do.”

 Kanao clasped her hands in front of her, nodding. “She did.” Peeking up, she added shyly, “And so do you.”

“Do I?” Shinobu questioned, looking up at the Wisteria trees that bordered her estate. Their sickly-sweet scent lingered in the air, the purple blooms fluttering in the wind, and even after all this time, Shinobu couldn’t get used to their scent. She felt small and impermanent in comparison to the eternally blooming giants. The problem she faced was bigger than her, almost as old as the trees themselves.

 A part of her feared it would continue long after she was gone.

 A soft touch brought her out of her thoughts and she looked down to find Kanao’s hand wrapped around hers. In front of her, her sister uttered simply, “Yes.”

 For once, Kanao looked self-assured, no doubt colouring her voice. Shinobu swallowed. It was wrong of her to lean on Kanao so much, to need this confidence. Despite herself, she raised her other hand, sandwiching Kanao’s between hers. “I guess you’re right,” she finally said, keeping her voice from cracking.

 This settled it. Any reservations she had about her idea, Shinobu let go. Her time was limited. It had always been the case, ever since she’d picked up her sister’s sword. No, even before that, when her parents had died, when she’d taken the Master’s hand, her body trembling from fear. It was just more so now; she knew her expiration date better than most.

 Only, this wasn’t just revenge. It couldn’t be. Not when Kanao was standing in front of her, love and belief shining through her eyes.

 No, this was about protecting. About keeping her family, however small it was now, safe.

 “Thanks.” Shinobu pulled her hand free. The coin was still on her hand, heavy as ever.

 “Do you need to make a decision?” Kanao asked, her eyes flickering from the coin to Shinobu.

 “I guess. Heads, I’ll do it.” Shinobu flipped the coin, watching the bronze gleam in the sunlight. She already knew what side it’d land.

 Tomorrow, she’d talk to the Master about the Wisteria poison.

 -x-

 “AHHHH!” Tanjirou roared, his sword high in the air as he charged forward. Shinobu could almost see the rush of an incoming wave, the clash against the rocks when he struck. If Giyuu’s technique had the tranquility of a pond, Tanjirou’s was the aggressive stream coursing ever forward.

 And she was the water spider, gliding above it all. She jumped, flipping through the air and landing behind him. Unable to change his course or stop his momentum, Tanjirou crashed into one of the trees surrounding the training grounds. He rolled backwards, falling flat on his back.

 “Good effort,” she praised, tucking a lock behind her ear as she bent over him.

 “T-thanks,” he wheezed. He lay there and tried to catch his breath.

 “You’re getting better.” Shinobu lifted her right arm and inspected her uniform. Poking her finger through the hole he made, she chuckled. All this from a boy who just learned to keep his breathing constant. “You’re a quick learner.”

 Tanjirou’s eyes lit up and he sat up quickly. “Really?”

 “Really,” she nodded, humming her agreement.

 “G-great.” He’d moved too quickly, and his body struggled to keep him upright before giving up entirely. Falling flat on his back, he closed his eyes and sighed happily. “I can try again in a minute.”

 There was something utterly refreshing about his earnestness and honesty. It reminded her a little of Rengoku. Maybe she should have them meet properly after this. Sitting next to him on the cool, wet grass, she leaned back and enjoyed the cool breeze. “It’s fine, take your time.”

 “Thanks.” His breathing had yet to even out.

 Glancing over to her right, she observed their audience on the veranda. Hidden in the shade, Nezuko was watching them curiously, her pink eyes bright despite the gloom. Kiyo was sitting behind her, braiding her hair, while Sumi and Naho neatly folded their laundry. At first, they’d run away at the sight of her, but now, they looked almost too relaxed next to her.

 Nezuko. A demon that didn’t hunger. Shinobu’s eyes flicked back to the panting Tanjirou. “You’re going to kill Muzan for her,” she asked without thinking.

 Tanjirou’s eyes flew open and he stared at her in surprise.  “How…”

 She chuckled. “It’s not like you hide it.” Or, even if he tried, could hide it well. Tanjirou was far too frank for deception.

 “R-right.” Tanjirou gave a sheepish smile, his cheeks colouring a light red. No doubt he was remembering past declarations of Muzan’s death. He sat up slowly and waved to Nezuko. “It’s the only way to save her.”

 Shinobu imagined her expression was the same whenever she looked at Kanae—tender, soft, a little sad. Picking a strand of grass, she methodically tore it to pieces. “You could die.”

 “I won’t,” he replied immediately, filled with the confidence of youth. For a moment, she believed him. There was something in Tanjirou that she hadn’t seen in ages, a hopeful belief in the future mixed with a tragic understanding of the present.

 Perhaps Muzan could be defeated in her lifetime.

 Still, wishes didn’t make things so, and Shinobu tossed the grass pieces at him. “You could die,” she repeated firmly.

 Tanjirou looked at her now. Recognizing the seriousness of the question, he frowned, crossing his arms as he considered it. “I…” He lowered his eyes, taking a deep breath before offering a sad smile. “That doesn’t matter. Nezuko’s family; I have to try, no matter what.” Once more, he looked at his sister. “She’d do the same for me.”

 “That, I can understand.” Even now, she could smell the Wisteria, hear the click of her nail flipping the coin. Kanae’s blood had been so warm, her body so cold. There were things you did for family, no matter the cost, and she found herself looking for Kanao even though she wouldn’t be here. “There are some things more important than your life.”

 “Yeah.” Tanjirou nodded.

 Shinobu turned to him, sizing him up. He’d survived grief, managed to stand even when sorrow threatened to swallow him whole. Kanao would need someone like that when she died. Selfishly, she asked, “Would you be friends with Kanao?”

 His eager nod eased the load on her shoulders ever so slightly.

 -x-

 Sitting on the porch, Shinobu gently swirled the sake in her cup. It was a rare night she got to relax, to just sit here and admire the night sky. The moon hung low in the heavens, full and heavy, and the gentlest of breezes rustled through the grass.

 Behind her, quiet footsteps approached her and she smiled. “I thought you didn’t like drinking,” she teased, glancing over her shoulder as Giyuu stepped out into the moonlight.

 “I don’t,” he stated, slowly sitting down next to her. As usual, his blank expression and dry tone gave away nothing.

 “Could have fooled me,” she muttered, taking a sip. She wasn’t quite sure when this had started, this almost-habit of late-night drinking. At some point, he’d started joining her when she relaxed and watched the moon. At some point, she’d stopped minding it.

 “I don’t think anyone could fool you,” he answered bluntly, his eyes on the moon.

 She chuckled. For a man who didn’t know how to joke, he was constantly unintentionally funny. “No, I suppose not.” Her wits were the only thing that made up for her stature. Leaning forward, she smiled teasingly. “So did you miss my company or the view while you were away?”

 Giyuu’s brow furrowed, the only indication that he was frowning. He fell silent, more so than usual, and she hadn’t expected him to consider her question so seriously.

 Perhaps she should let him off easy this time. It had been a while since they’d last sat together like this and despite her attitude, she did enjoy his company. Somehow. It wouldn’t do to scare him away. “You don’t—”

 “Both,” Giyuu finally admitted.

 “—have to…” Shinobu trailed off, blinking as she processed his answer. Staring at him, she tried not to gape. “Both?”

 He merely nodded. Nothing about his straight back, the profile of his blank face, or even his hands, neatly tucked into the opposite arm’s sleeves, gave away his emotions.

 Both. Shinobu bit her lip, stopping herself from asking what exactly he meant by that. Did he like this quiet hour together too? Did he just miss the calm of it all? And would it be worth the frustrating hours of trying to pull the words from his lips?

 No, definitely not. Still, in a rare moment of honesty, she smiled into her cup. “Me too.”

 He glanced at her when she said that but still said nothing.

 She swirled her sake once more. The moon’s reflection rippled in the clear liquid. Butterflies danced in the nearby wisteria trees and even when she died, that scent would follow her to her grave. Taking advantage of the atmosphere, she asked, “Why did you spare Tanjirou and Nezuko?”

 From the corner of her eyes, she watched as he bit his lip, his frown growing deeper as he grappled with an answer. After a long silence punctuated only by the soft chirp of the cicadas, he finally answered, “She protected him.”

 “That was unusual for a demon,” she agreed. His expression was dark and she wondered if that reminded him of some incident in his past, some haunting memory he hadn’t finished wrestling with. For all her talk about becoming friends with demons, she would have killed Nezuko on the spot. Almost had, in fact, if not for the Master’s intervention.

 And now this unusual demon and her brother could be the very key to ending centuries worth of conflict. She set down her sake, no longer thirsty. “They’re going to come for her soon.” Shinobu could almost feel it. The new training, the Master’s changed tactics, everything was coming to a head.

 Her days were numbered. A year’s worth of poison had to be enough to bring the demon down. Tomorrow, or maybe the day after, she’d have to tell Kanao. She wasn’t looking forward to that conversation.

 “Yeah.” Giyuu nodded, finally looking at her. “We’ll be ready.”

 Shinobu raised a brow. “That’s surprisingly hopeful of you.” He didn’t say anything but she had a feeling it was Tanjirou’s influence.

 Something started changing after Tanjirou had arrived, and it wasn’t just the demons who’d transformed. She heard the quiet clink of a coin, saw gold flipping against the bright blue sky. The coin would land, the die set, and there was no time to say it but now. Fiddling with her sleeves, Shinobu asked quietly, “Could you take care of Kanao?” Impassive eyes stared at her and she smiled, giving nothing away. “If something happens,” she clarified.

 “No,” he answered just as bluntly as he normally did.

 “How cruel.” Shinobu sighed.

 “She has you,” Giyuu continued, as steady as a river, and for all the deaths they’d experienced, it seemed hers had never crossed his mind.

 Shinobu took pride in the compliment. She hoped it wouldn’t hurt him too much when he found out he was wrong. “She does.”

 There was a small gap between them, a space that had shrunk in the past years. She wondered if it would have disappeared in the coming months, if their fingers would have overlapped and thighs brushed one another.

 A question she’d never know the answer to. She felt sadder at that than she’d thought.

 -x-

 The demon’s strikes were harder than she’d expected. Shinobu lay on the wooden platform, gasping as she tried to breathe. Her ribs were cracked, a trickle of blood escaping her lips, and she barely had the energy to open her eyes, let alone grab her sword.

 No wonder he was an upper moon. He was far too strong, and she couldn’t kill him with her weapon.

 She’d hoped and hoped, but it seemed there was no wiggling out of her fate.

 Shinobu, Kanae stood by her head, her expression sad. You know what to do.

 Shinobu closed her eyes. Somewhere, a coin glinted in the sun, flipping through the air. Somewhere, the wisteria trees perfumed the air with their sticky, sweet scent. If she were honest, she’d made her decision long before that. The second she’d picked up her sister’s abandoned sword, rage swirling in her petite body, she’d known one way or another this was her destiny.

 Grabbing her sword, Shinobu took a deep breath. Maybe she should have closed that gap, reached over and grabbed Giyuu’s hand. Or prepared Kanao better, there were so many things she’d wanted to teach her.

 Damn it all, she thought she’d prepared herself for this, but there were so many things she wanted to do, to say. Her sister stared down at her and Shinobu hoped she wasn’t disappointed that she was going to die the same way she had.

 “Is that all?” Doma sighed, his voice grating her ears.

 “No,” she gritted out, forcing herself to stand.

 It was too late for regrets.

 The coin had landed heavily, the symbol digging into her skin. Heads, she had declared, her heart heavy with resignation. I guess I’ll do it.

 Shinobu raised her sword and charged.

[01kitty-moon]

My thoughts on the Og Sailor Moon/Sailor Moon Crystal/Eternal Part 2

I want to start with saying this-

I do enjoy both anime. I really do.

My thoughts about Sailor Moon OG anime.

First things first I LOVE 90's anime art style, so of course I love the style of OG sailor moon, it looks really good, the backgrounds are beautiful.

Artsyle is lovely. PERIOD.

The OST for the OG anime is awesome, it can be beautiful or just plain cool.

I love the first transformation OST SO MUCH.

(I don't like the others in the OG anime transformation ost though tbh.)

The other thing I love about the original is the fashion, the sheer amount of outfits is awesome and I always enjoy a show that is able to have different outfits.

Now I really like the first few episodes when it's just Usagi and Jadeite, in fact I like the first arc a little bit more in the OG simply because idk, we get to see more of the four "eite's" though I don't enjoy some of their Arc's tbh or how their characters were handled in the end.

I found their arcs would start strong and then just kinda end leaving you like??? Okaaaay.

If I'm being honest I dont enjoy the pacing or the writing for alot of the OG anime if I'm being truthful.

Like the end of season 1 in my opinion wasnt written well, in fact it felt very meh and blotchy.

Did I like the full party kill? Yeah.

But it wasnt well written.

I REALLY don't like OG Tuxedo Mask. Like during the first half of S1 I thought his snark was funny, and I enjoyed their interactions at first.

But by the second half I came to REALLY dislike him.

No wonder everyone wanted Usagi to be with 90's Seiya, OG Mamoru was an ass.

(I refer to him as Tuxedo Ass and no I dont take constructive criticism)

Also dont get me started on the moonlight knight filler crap. (That filler arc had potential to be REALLY amazing and impactful and they totally wasted it)

Also his relationship with rei is kinda.....weird. I didnt like it. (And not for shipping reasons, but because it genuinely irked me)

Now I do love that we got more episodes exploring the girls personalities and friendships, but I often times didnt enjoy how they were written as "friends?" Alot of it felt fake despite the "development" they got.

Dont get me wrong I like the OG anime in general and some episodes I think are AMAZING.

But I'd go into an arc and be really hyped for what I thought was coming, only for the outcome to be really lame or immature. The writing just felt bland and childish, but since OG is targetted more for a younger audience I do get it.

I got disappointed alot tbh ahaha.

Also if chibi moon from OG appeared I'd simply kill her, rip to OG usagi but I'm different.

(Also they made the kid feel way more incestuous than in crystal? Like this girl is 900, she isnt really a little kid though she is a young girl. Like she knows that's her dad, stop trying to fuck your dad pls)

Plus she is super annoying, always, never likable, never. (Some scenes were definetly comedic gold but as a character I wanted to set her on fire)

Prince demand isnt that great of a character and should have been set on fire right away, end of story.

This is a lazy way of writing my feelings but yeah it's what it is.

However overall it's okay. I like it.

(This is only my opinion of course pls dont attack me)

Sailor Moon Crystal

I made alot of my points when talking about the OG anime so the crystal one is short tbh.

Now I'll be honest. I truthfully enjoyed crystal most as a whole than I did the OG anime.

When it comes to the animation of season 1 and 2 I understand why people weren't fond of it.

It was wonky in many parts and the CG transformations were really ugly.

However I loved the artsyles in the still scenes.

And some backgrounds were really lovely.

Now the animation could be off, but it isnt the worst thing ever like people make it out to be.

Mamoru was great again (look I love the boy and his manga self)

While i didnt like the lack of development in the 4 "eites" the arc was okay. I kinda liked some of their arc here more than in OG, but I wish we got more of them and their story ( or at least Bi Zoisiete, I know that's OG original but it would have been cool)

Though it did feel lackluster at times, and season 1 could be off with pacing, when it comes to the other seasons however I found the pacing to be really good.

I loved the scene where she "killed" him and then herself, though I wish it had been animated better, it was great.

I also like how they touched more on her fear of being alone, and showed hints of that trauma as well as their identities meshing with their past selves.

The music is 👌 though I miss some of the OG music.

I can't tell you the real reason I love it more than the OG. I guess I just enjoyed the tone overall?

I like the more story focused version if sailor moon I guess, I felt like the fucked around too much in the OG, while Crystak they dont fuck around enough lol.

But I'd rather watch the plot centric one rather than the overly leisure OG fillers.

I liked some of the characterizations better in crystal as well, I found rei more likable (look can we admit she was a bit TOO much of a bitch in the OG? And often wasnt justified but she got away with it?)

Haruka and Michiru weren't....super likeable in the OG sometimes for me and while that can be a good thing in writing, (and ik alot of people prefer them in the OG) I immediately fell in love with them in crystal.

Also this is probably just me but I like that everyone was less boy crazy, giving way to just, easier to bond with characters.

(Being Bi/Pan-Ace and watching girl only EVER be boy crazy is really annoying tbh I just, like for them to at least have 1 character who's just kinda eh about the whole dating thing, and tbh alot of the characters came off as more bi in crystal which was lovely)

I hear alot of people complain about how they dont feel the friendship between the group the way they did in the OG but I kinda felt the opposite, and their sudden leap into being SUPER into Usagi really stems from their identities from their past lives mixing with the present.

Also just saying, if someone like usagi came into my life? I'd immediately die for her too, just saying, she's so so kind and fun, and precious like? Duh of course she's going to make those introverts fall all over her.

Also CHIBI MOON I LOVE HER! (I do not like this kid in OG, like ever, set that creature on fire pls)

But crystal chibi moon? I adore that girl.

Season 3 was great, I LOVED IT so much.

I got my lesbian's in FULL glory.

I got Sailor Bi Moon.

I got hotaru and well, better writing in that arc compared to the butchered OG version

(If u prefer the OG version that's fine this is just how I feel)

And I'm really excited for eternal, its SO beautiful, the music makes me so emotional, the animation and art is beautiful, tbh it feels more like Sailor Moon than any of the other parts. It just instantly takes me to the manga.

(My brother and I both prefer crystal tbh)

Anyways we talk have our own opinions, and this is mine (made at 3am guys I'm tired)

The manga is BEAUTIFUL and so is Crystal, but OG has it's good points too, I like them all.

From a story and writing standpoint I think Crystal is superior to Og anime.

But if you want something more lighthearted and more slice of life the OG is probably for you!

Or you can be like me and love both.

(I also prefer crystal Usagi to OG Usagi more often than not, though OG usagi is definetly relatable like 100%, but I liked that maturity in Crystal Usagi that got stronger when her memories of her past life came to her, you can tell they all kinda go through an identity crisis and have to grow up "again" which is interesting to me)

Both stories however bring up great messages and promote femininity so much I love it ahhhh sailor moon is a treasure.

Crystal made me fall in love with the story, while OG made me lowkey ship Jadeite and Usagi in the first few episodes.

(Pls dont ask, ok, just don't, that one seen was a bit too hot for me to not immediately think they should kiss)

[kumeko]

A/N: For the @fewriterszine! I have so many things I want to write for post canon, ahhhh. My partner  cebrys_ @ twitter/instagram drew an amazing piece to go with it!

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Victories weren’t supposed to feel hollow. They were supposed to fill Corrin with pride, like when she landed a strike on Xander during training, or the rare times she beat Leo in chess. They were supposed to fill her with joy, like when she won one of Elise’s parlor games or snuck up on Camilla. There were many feelings that came with victory, but none of them were supposed to be negative.

 Yet, as Corrin stood in front of the Nohr throne, her sword hilt deep in the man she’d once called father, all she could feel was emptiness. His wrinkled hand gripped the blade, the metal cutting into his hand until blood slowly dripped down the edge. Garon looked at the blade, then at her.

 “You,” he breathed.

 Corrin didn’t say anything. She stared at him, though she knew he couldn’t see her back. His sight was gone now, his hearing too most likely. Blood dripped down his lips as he gurgled his last breath.

“We did it!” Hinoka yelled from the center of the throne room, her voice echoing through the vast hall.

So focused had she been on Garon, Corrin had almost forgotten that she wasn’t alone. Around her, various soldiers cheered, victory finally at hand. Despite her booming voice, Hinoka leaned against her lance tiredly, no doubt done with all the fighting.

 Armour clanked as Ryoma climbed the steps to the throne. Corrin watched as her brother slowly approached her, as his heavy hand rested on her shoulder. The touch burned. Xander used to squeeze her like that.

 “Good job,” Ryoma praised, his stern expression softening as he smiled. “We couldn’t have done this without you.”

 Still, she said nothing. Behind her, her kidnapper dissolved into water, his life finally gone. Xander would have inherited the throne next. This hall would have been decorated with the fanciest flowers Elise could convince their older brother to buy. Camilla would have picked their outfits for the coronation and Leo would have rolled his eyes at the spectacle of it all.

 None of that could happen anymore. Corrin looked around, at where Sakura was healing the wounded, where Takumi was helping Azura stand, where the Hoshido soldiers were clapping each other on the back. Camilla and Leo were nowhere in sight.

 She didn’t know if she should be relieved or cry about that.

 -x-

 Corrin stared at the Nohr Royal Castle. In the night, she couldn’t see it all that well, the torches barely outlining its shape, but she’d observed it long enough to memorize the half-mast flags. The interior was no doubt covered in black. Xander’s and Elise’s bodies had to have been moved by now, their clothes prepared for a public viewing before the state funeral.

 “Couldn’t sleep?” Ryoma asked, sitting down next to her. The log next to the firepit was barely wide enough to fit them both, especially with his imposing frame.

 Corrin tore her eyes away from the castle and back down to the tent city around them. The Hoshidan army was still camped outside the castle gates, gathering provisions slowly before the long march home. She still hadn’t figured out if she would join them. She still didn’t know if she could stay here.

 “No, I…” Corrin trailed off before rubbing her arm. “Azura…I should have stopped her from singing.”

 Even now, she could feel Azura’s hand in hers, hear her weak voice. They had barely celebrated Garon’s death before Azura had collapsed, her body disappearing like dew in the morning. Corrin curled her hand and closed her eyes. “We should have found a way to win without her powers.”

 “Maybe. Azura is—was very stubborn about helping others. Even over herself.” Ryoma gave her a weak smile. His voice cracked slightly, but somehow stayed strong. He reached out, squeezing her shoulder. “She would have sung either way, if only to save us from getting hurt.”

 “This hurts more than a cut would,” Corrin mumbled, resting a hand on his as she soaked in his comfort.

  The fire flickered, shadows dancing across Ryoma’s face. Without his armour, he didn’t look as imposing as he normally did. He looked like a man, not a king, not a warrior. “It does.”

 Xander had looked like that too, when he had tea with her, and Corrin swallowed the lump in her throat. “I should have tried.” She was proud how her voice didn’t crack. “She should be here with us.”

 Instead, she had disappeared like the rain, not even leaving her pendant behind for Corrin to remember her by. All that was left was a memory to mourn and Corrin wasn’t sure if it was easier that way, if having no body was better than having one. As it was, her siblings were taking it hard. Hinoka looked small, frail, and Takumi radiated regret with every step. Corrin had watched as they’d comfort one another, their hugs barely keeping the tears at bay.

 It took all four of them to handle Azura’s death. Corrin looked up at the castle again. Just what hope did Camilla and Leo have with two?

 -x-

 Corrin stood in the grand hall, an anxious ball of nerves. This room had always been imposing, all dark corners and large swathes of shadows. The pillars are a cold grey, the décor menacing. It had been less than a week since the war ended and if she looked, she could see the blood stains on the ground, barely scrubbed away.

 When they’d snuck into the palace, they hadn’t gone through this room. For that, Corrin was glad, it was hard enough to breathe in here as it was. She could still see Iago and Garon at the top of the stairs, all cruel words and cold eyes as they told her to kill the prisoners. Corrin’s heart constricted, a helpless and trapped sensation flooding through her.

 After all that happened, it could be Camilla and Leo standing there next, accusing her of war crimes. Around her, she heard the guards’ whispers and felt their angry stares. She was the traitor princess, after all. After killing Xander and Elise, she shouldn’t be here at all.

 “It’s okay, milady.” A warm hand slipped into hers, jerking her out of her thoughts. Corrin looked to her right. Jakob offered her a reassuring smile as his fingers interlaced with hers. His grip was firm.

“Jakob.” Corrin tried to smile back. Her chest still felt tight.

 “They’ll meet you.” Jakob lowered his eyes slightly. “They adore you.”

 Corrin almost laughed. “After all I’ve done? I rejected their hands so many times, waged war against their country, killed Xander and Elise—”

 “You didn’t kill them,” Jakob interrupted in a rare burst of anger. His jaw clenched, the way it would whenever he’d reprimanded her for being too reckless. “Pride and stubbornness killed Xander. Ideals without the strength to uphold them killed Elise.”

 “Jakob!” Corrin hissed, yanking her hand out his. “They—”

 “I mean no disrespect with that,” Jakob replied, cutting her off once more. “Just the truth. It is a tragedy what happened, but it is no more your fault than theirs.”

 Corrin glared at him. “And if I hadn’t attacked Nohr?”

 “Then Garon would have conquered Hoshido and the world would have been worse off for it,” Jakob replied quietly, his anger dissipating. Now he only looked sad. “Xander and Elise would have been no safer in that world than they were in this one.”

 Corrin opened her mouth, ready to argue, but what could she say in response to that? He was right. It was a harsh truth, but he was right. Garon hadn’t seen them as more than pawns, and he would have disposed of Xander and Elise the second they weren’t needed. Camilla and Leo would have died too. At least they were alive here. She pursed her lips, her hand curling into a fist.

 “I…”

 Before she could apologize, doors on the second floor opened. A man walked to the rail and announced, “Her Majesty Camilla and His Highness Leo have arrived.”

 His voice echoed through the room. Corrin looked up to find Camilla and Leo at the top of the stairs, looking down at her. For a long moment, they stared at each other. Corrin wasn’t sure she remembered how to breathe. How long had it been since they’d seen each other? Only days, only weeks, and yet it felt like years. There was a before Xander’s and Elise’s deaths, and an after.

 The room was oddly silent. Not even the guards made a noise, no murmuring or the clank of their armour. Corrin swallowed, waiting for judgement to fall on her, when Camilla hurried down the stairs. “Corrin!”

 That was all the warning she got before her elder sister rammed into her, her arms wrapping around her tighter than rope. Camilla squeezed her tightly, resting her head on Corrin’s shoulders. Her long purple hair tickled Corrin’s neck.

 “Camilla,” Corrin managed, slowly hugging back. Her sister felt thinner, bonier. Resting her hand on Camilla’s back, she couldn’t feel the muscles she was used to, the strength that allowed her to pick up her favourite axe.

 “I’m so glad you’re back,” Camilla murmured softly, as though she’d crack at anything louder than a whisper. “I…I’m just…so glad.”

 “Me too.” Corrin’s eyes watered and she clutched her sister tightly. It had been too long since they’d last hugged, since they hadn’t faced each other across the battlefield. She wanted to drag Leo into the hug, to hold both them as close as possible, but he still stood at the top of the stairs.

 Corrin looked up at him, their eyes meeting. He wore an unreadable expression, his lips a straight line. His jaw tightened and he whirled around, leaving them.

 -x-

 “It’s getting late,” Camilla muttered, staring out the windows that lined her bedroom. The sun had just set, the last vestiges of light barely bright enough to outline the city sprawling around the castle. Servants had already lit the candles, small pools of lights in every corner of the room. Seated on the bed, Corrin could just make out the city.

 She hadn’t seen the capital like this. Before, she hadn’t been allowed to, and after, they’d been at war. Unlike Hoshido, Nohr was a darker place, one of moonlight and not sunlight. There was a desolate beauty to it that she knew her Hoshidian siblings couldn’t see.

 “Yeah,” Corrin agreed, her eyes moving to their faint reflection in the window. Camilla hadn’t left her side throughout the day, her hand often neatly tucked into Corrin’s arms to keep them glued together. Even now, Camilla was braiding her hair, allowing them no more than a foot’s space between them. She hadn’t had the heart to pull away, and to be honest she wasn’t sure if she wanted to.

 She felt like the castle was holding its breath, waiting for the other shoe to drop, and she didn’t want to face the storm alone. Corrin stared at Camilla’s reflection. “I guess it’s time for bed.”

 “Bed…” Camilla trailed off, her hands freezing. She stared at the door, as though she expected someone to burst in.

 When she didn’t continue, Corrin leaned back, resting her head on her sister’s chest. From this close, her sister looked worn and she frowned as she looked up. “Is something wrong?”

 “No, I…” Camilla tore her eyes away from the door. Smiling down at Corrin, she gently pushed her back up into a seated position. “Darling, you’re messing up the braid. You can’t sleep until we’re done. How about…” Her voice cracked. “How about a sleepover? For your first night here.”

 “A sleepover?” Corrin could almost hear Elise’s voice there, hear the exact lit as she pleaded her case.

 “Y-yeah.” Head bowed, Camilla busied herself with unbraiding Corrin’s hair. “We must have one—your room hasn’t been prepared yet! Why, in the morning you could choose one yourself, there’s so many here.”

 “I…” Corrin didn’t know if she was going to stay. She didn’t know how to, after all the misery she’d caused. Yet, hearing the crack in Camilla’s voice, the way her hands trembled, she didn’t know how to leave either. “A sleepover sounds fun.”

 “The maids are making tea and…” Camilla tugged Corrin’s hair into a tight braid. “We were supposed to have a ball when you arrived, darling.”

 “A party?” Corrin turned around but Camilla firmly pushed her jaw back.

 “You’ll ruin the braid,” she fussed, weaving Corrin’s long locks into a single braid. “And yes, a party for you. Elise…” Her voice cracked again but she pushed forward. “planned all of it. The food, the music, the decorations. Xander rejected all of it.” Camilla laughed, a bittersweet sound. “It was too expensive, so Elise kept cutting down things and trying again. He couldn’t get her to stop all together.”

 Corrin felt a bump on her back. Turning her head slightly, she could see Camilla’s head resting against her back, her hands tight on Corrin’s shoulders.

 “Despite his words, he was just as excited as she was. He even got a room cleaned up for you.”

 Corrin could just picture it. She closed her eyes. “He always hid his kindness.”

 “He is—was adorable like that. Though not as adorable as Leo.” Camilla laughed wetly. “He helped Elise change her plans, even though he kept calling it a waste of time.”

 It was strange. The room was empty, save for the two of them, but Corrin could feel her siblings around her. Elise sitting on the bed, Camilla braiding her hair as she rattled off her latest frustrations. Xander and Leo arguing over budgets. Camilla and Xander would exchange a knowing look, the two eldest working together behind the scenes.

 Nowhere in that picture was her and Corrin felt a lump in her throat.

 -x-

 For the past two days, Corrin hadn’t seen hide nor hair of Leo. To be fully honest, she hadn’t seen his or anyone else’s retainers either, and she didn’t know if that was because they were avoiding her or if they’d been ordered away. Either way, she was glad—she didn’t know how she could look at Effie or Arthur after what’d happened.

 And she could never look at Laslow or Peri again.

 Yet today he stood in the hallway, staring out the windows to the private gardens. Her heart constricted at the sight of him, her body stock still as she figured out her next move. He hadn’t noticed her yet. From his profile, his gaze was locked firmly on something outside. Steeling herself, she marched to him.

 He still didn’t move, not even when she came to a stop right next to him. Corrin looked at him, then out the window. There was a dirt patch outside, one that showed signs of digging, but there were no obvious hints as to what had been dug up or buried there. The rest of the garden was filled with thorny roses and sharply-trimmed bushes.

 “What’s there?” she asked, unable to stop herself.

 “It’s…” Leo caught himself before he finished the sentence. Tearing his eyes from the dirt, he turned to her. “What’re you doing here?”

 Leo had never been a cold person. Despite his attitude, he’d always been warm, giving. Corrin couldn’t help the shiver that ran up her spine at his stare, at his eyes that looked like they could pierce through her. Even when they’d been at war, he hadn’t looked so icy.

 “I…” Corrin swallowed, forcing herself to smile. “I wanted to talk to you.”

 He didn’t say anything. She wasn’t sure if that was a good sign or not.

 Clasping her hands, she continued, “I…I know that it’s hard…that I did something unforgivable…but…”

 Camilla hadn’t wanted or allowed an apology, no matter how many times Corrin wanted to give one. Now that she had the chance to say it, she didn’t know where to start, what words to use. Xander had died by her hand, whether he wanted it or not. Elise had sacrificed herself. A kingdom had been invaded, and she had led the charge.

 “I’m sorry. For everything. I—”

 Leo’s jaw tightened. “Don’t.”

 Corrin looked at him owlishly. “What?”

 “Don’t,” he repeated before turning on his heel and leaving.

 Corrin didn’t chase. She didn’t have the right to.  

 -x-

 Castle Krakenburg had never been Corrin’s home. No, hers had been the Northern Fortress. She knew the ins and outs of her fort, the rooms her siblings lived, the places they liked to play. The castle was a blank canvas to her, the history of it invisible to her alone.

 It was easy, though, to guess which spaces belonged to Xander and Elise. There were rooms Camilla’s eyes would just slide past, areas where she’d step around as though she could see Xander’s ghost. Leo could be found in only certain sections of the library and the study and some items were left with a layer of dust on them as though even the maids weren’t ready to face them.

 Corrin had no such compunctions. She snuck around in the middle of the night, when Camilla wasn’t watching, when Leo didn’t have to be avoided. A candle in hand, she mapped out a castle that had once been as foreign as Hoshido.

 Xander’s room was sparsely furnished. She sat down gingerly on his hard bed, on the ever so practical grey blankets. The pillowcase was bright blue, flowers embroidered on the edges, and that had to be a gift from Elise or Camilla. Maybe both, Elise had never been patient enough for sewing. There was a stack of papers on his side table and Corrin hesitated before reading the top one. It was a report on the country’s food supply, and of course he’d read that before he slept. He’d ever been the work-a-holic.

 Even now, Corrin remembered his profile in the night, his sword glinting in the moonlight as he practiced his swings. Her brother had cared deeply for his country. Too deeply. Tears pricked her eyes and she left his room before she could cry.

 On another night, she explored Elise’s room, all pinks and yellows. There was only a musty scent now, but Corrin liked to imagine it smelled floral at one point. Despite how flowers were hard to get here, it was hard to picture Elise without them. Her closet was filled with dresses, the fanciest of which looked hardly touched. Instead it was the simpler ones that looked thoroughly worn, with small patches hidden here and there to keep clothing together.

 Elise had always been wiser than she’d acted, though Corrin hadn’t realized just how much. It was disquieting to realize she didn’t know her siblings as well as she’d thought. That she might never know, her sister taking her secrets to the grave.

 Night after night, Corrin explored the castle, sitting in Xander’s spot in the study, reading from Elise’s alcove in a tower. Despite how strong their presence was for Camilla and Leo, Corrin couldn’t feel them.  A chair was just a chair, a book a book, and all of these little pieces didn’t make up a person as much as she pushed them together.

 -x-

 The Hoshidians were gone, her family with them, and Corrin wasn’t sure if she shouldn’t have left as well. Just as much as Camilla needed her, Leo didn’t. Even their meals were separate, Camilla eating with her. If she’d gone, maybe they could have grieved together.

 “Maybe you should eat with Leo?” Corrin suggested finally, turning to her right. The Nohr dining table was overly long—even with all of her siblings, they could never have filled in all of the chairs.

 Camilla raised a brow. “What do you mean, darling? I always eat with him.”

 “Huh?” Corrin blinked, thrown off kilter.

 “I eat with you, and then with him.” Camilla reached over, squeezing her arm tenderly. “You are both precious to me and I would never leave either of you alone.”

 “Oh.” Corrin looked down at her plate, not sure what to say. She hadn’t thought of that possibility at all.

 “Don’t worry, I’m sure we’ll eat together soon.” Camilla smiled sadly. “He just needs some time.”

 “Does he? I think he hates me,” Corrin admitted, her shoulders sinking at the memory. Even now, she could feel his icy stare. All of their encounters lasted three seconds.

 Camilla wrapped an arm around her. “No, he doesn’t—”

 “It’d be stranger if he didn’t.” Corrin leaned against Camilla, soaking in her warmth. “Why don’t you? After I…” She couldn’t say the word killed, it stuck in her throat. “After all I did.”

 Camilla fell silent. For a moment, Corrin wondered if she’d finally succeeded in driving off her last sibling, if she’d have to pack her bags and head to Hoshido sooner than she’d thought.

 “We weren’t great either,” Camilla finally uttered, resting her cheek on Corrin’s head. “And more importantly, I’m tired of hating. It hurts too much. Elise…Elise wouldn’t have liked it. Leo, he’ll come around. He just needs time.”

 Nestled like this, Corrin could believe anything. She closed her eyes and listened to Camilla breathe. “I hope so.”

 “He will.” Camilla sighed. “Hopefully by the coronation. I need both of you there with me.”

 “The coronation…are you ready?” she asked.

 “Not at all.” Camilla laughed dryly. “Xander had always been the leader, the strong one. He always had a plan.” Her voice grew pained. “I…I don’t know how to do that. I’m not a leader. I never have been.”

 “I’m not one either.” Corrin pulled away, looking Camilla in the eye. She smiled encouragingly. “But I think we could do it together.”

 Camilla’s eyes grew wide before she hugged Corrin. “Yes, we can.”

 -x-

 The clock struck twelve, large metal gongs ringing through the night. Corrin stood next to a window, listening to the chimes. Yawning, she had to admit that it was late. She’d done enough exploration for the day.

 Heading back to her room, she paused as a small light to her right caught her eye. Someone was out in the garden. Quietly, she approached the window, peering out to make out who it was. They weren’t moving, the lamp in their hand, and she could just make out a familiar cape.

 Leo.

 Now that she was looking, she realized this was the same window as before, that he was standing in front of that dirt patch. Quickly, she opened the window and hopped outside. Just like the last time, he didn’t hear her, his gaze fixed firmly on the dirt. It was dark, so she couldn’t see much, but the plot looked as empty as it had before.

 Before she could voice her question, Leo murmured, “Elise wanted to grow sunflowers here.”

 Corrin snapped her attention at Leo, but he didn’t look at her. She held her breath, afraid of breaking the moment. He might run away again like a scared rabbit.

 “They never grew. No matter how many times she planted them. Elise never studied for anything, but she read every book on flowers and gardening she could find.”

 Corrin reached down, grabbing his hand tightly.

 He didn’t react. “The soil was dead the entire time.”

 It was scary, how monotone his voice was, but his hand was warm and she intertwined their fingers.

 Finally, he turned to her. “Sometimes I wonder if all of Nohr is as dead as this lot.”

 “It isn’t,” she replied firmly.

 “What do you know?” he snapped back, but he didn’t pull away from her touch. For once, his argument was feeble, his sharp words deserting him. “You were always trapped in that fortress.”

 “I saw a lot on my way here,” Corrin replied, her eyes locked on his. It was strange, the words just came as she thought of the underground city, of Elise guiding them there. “Nohr is alive, its people are alive, despite everything Garon did to them. They just need a little help, a little kindness, and they’ll flourish.”

 “Elise was kind.” A tear slid down his cheek. “Xander had a vision. Camilla and I…we have neither.”

 “You have each other.” She reached up, wiping his cheek. “You have me.”

 “I…” More tears fell, like a dam bursting open. “I could have saved them.”

 Corrin didn’t bother to ask who. “You didn’t do anything.”

 “That’s just it!” he shouted, grabbing her hand, sobbing silently. His voice broke. “I didn’t do anything. I didn’t help them. I didn’t help you. I just walked away from it all and Elise…I could have saved her. Maybe not Xander, but at least her.”

 He fell to his knees, weak, his hand still wrapped tightly around her wrist.

 “Instead, I did nothing.”

 “You didn’t do anything wrong.” It was too much and Corrin collapsed to the ground now. Wrapping her arms around Leo, she hugged him tightly. “I killed them. My sword cut through them. Their blood’s on my hands, not yours.”

 “But you weren’t wrong,” Leo mumbled, hugging her back, his hands clenching her shirt like a lifeline. “Garon had to go and you weren’t wrong. And if I…if I’d joined you, maybe Xander would have stepped down. Maybe none of this had to happen.”

 “And if I’d asked or tried harder or—”

 It was too much, thinking about all of the what-ifs, the lost possibilities. She wailed, like she hadn’t since she was a child. Leo crumpled, sobbing, his hand still in hers.

 -x-

 Unlike Ryoma’s coronation, Camilla’s was not one of pomp and celebration. It was a solemn event. The halls were draped in black and gold, with the occasional red highlight. This was both a goodbye and a greeting, an ending and a beginning.

 Xander and Elise rested under marble tombs, joining their ancestors. Camilla stood on the balcony overlooking the crowds of watchful citizens, their words a dull murmur compared to Hoshido’s energetic cheers. The fur-trimmed purple cloak she wore swallowed her entirely, and the hand that held her scepter trembled. She looked small. Lost.

 Standing behind glass doors, Corrin watched as her sister slowly stepped toward the railing. Leo was already standing there, announcing Camilla’s presence. Corrin couldn’t hear them properly, the glass muffling the sound, and suddenly she was in the Northern Fortress, watching as her siblings left for the castle. Most of her childhood had been spent like that, watching, waiting, always apart and never with.

 “Corrin.”

 Corrin blinked, hearing her name, and looked out the window. Camilla and Leo were turned toward her, their hands outstretched. Confused, she poked her head out the door. “What?”

 “Didn’t you say we’d rule together?” Camilla smiled, beckoning her to come closer.

 “But—”

 “You’re our sister, you have to suffer through these functions with us,” Leo added impatiently, but he was smiling too.

 Corrin stared at their hands, at them. At the ghosts of Xander and Elise that stood behind them. That was right, her time in the fortress had never been lonely. Her family, her friends, they’d always opened the door, calling her out.

 It was the same now, even if now there were only two hands reaching for her instead of four. Corrin pushed open the door and stepped outside.

 Whatever the future held now, they’d handle it together.