#If I don't get in that's fine I'm just going to finish my bachelor's and go do a master's in design somewhere

[catboybrain]

sigh. Might as well mention it here but I'm going to try to transfer schools lole... Probably won't get in but yeag. Trying

[buttercandy16]

In-laws

PAIRING: Dark!Agatha Harkness x Reader, Agatha Harkness x Reader x Rio Vidal

SUMMARY: In-laws are the worst and you found out the hard way.

WARNING(s): Dark themes, Non-con, and a whole lot of SMUT!

A/N: Dark themes ahead. If you find these things disturbing I strongly advice that you skip this post. Thank you!

Y/N POV 

The night's cold breeze is crisp on my face as I stand outside the balcony thinking about how perfect my wedding tomorrow will be. 

Nicky and I have been together since my parents started working for his parents. At first, I was reluctant to engage in a romantic relationship with him since in the eyes of society we were unfit for each other, but he was persistent and in the end, I let love win. I was even more thankful that his parents accepted me and my family with open arms despite our lowly status in life. 

After years of being together, we are finally making it official tomorrow as husband and wife. 

I just finished celebrating my bachelorette party earlier which was neatly organized by one of my soon-to-be mother-in-law, Agatha. While Nicky is having his bachelor's party with his set of friends. 

Everything will be perfect, for sure nothing will go wrong. 

"Excited?" I was pulled out from my thoughts when Agatha appeared by my side with a bottle of wine in hand. 

For the record, I'm currently staying at Nicky's house. Both of his mothers insisted that I stay here before the wedding and I agreed.

"Yeah, I'm so excited to get married to Nicky!" I exclaimed excitedly. 

Agatha gave me a chuckle before waving the wine bottle in front of my face. 

"Good, then we better celebrate with this." 

"Ummm... I don't want to be rude, but I'll have to decline. I don't drink alcohol, remember?"

Agatha rolled her eyes at me before she leaned in closer to my ear. 

"Oh come on, sweetheart. That was different, this one we get to enjoy all to ourselves, and I think it's about time you try right? And it's not like we're gonna get wasted, you'll be fine tomorrow. I swear." 

I suppose... 

"O--okay then, but I'll only drink one glass.”

"One glass is enough" Agatha smiled at me mischievously before slightly pushing me inside the room. 

I was a bit nervous about how she was acting, she seemed pushy. But I was fast to dismiss that thought as she filled our glasses with wine. 

She gave me mine before sitting next to me on the sofa, only an arm's length away from each other. 

"Go on" she urged playfully... 

I swirled the wine in my glass slightly before carefully putting it to my lips and tentatively sipping the liquid. I found it delicious and very cooling.

“This is delicious!" 

"Yes, simple but very soothing. Finest wine you can ever have. But, you must drink deeply for the full effect." 

I eagerly did as I was told, and Agatha seemed satisfied with this. Soon I was holding an empty glass. I had drained it and hadn't even noticed. The drink was that smooth. The only problem is that I found that I was still thirsty. 

"Could I have another, please?" I asked, her eyes glinted with something dark from my request. 

"I think that can be arranged." 

Agatha was careful to replenish my glass whenever it emptied as we talked and talked into the night. 

It was quite odd, no matter how much I drink I still feel thirsty. 

I wondered if it was starting to affect me. I noticed that the room was becoming increasingly warm. Worse, I was finding my body becoming uncomfortably warm. My face was becoming flush. My heart was beating very fast and I was practically panting, my breath had gotten so fast. I was starting to sweat inside my clothes, too. My clothes were becoming very confining. How odd, I thought. It was supposed to be a chilly evening. But now, I desire nothing more than to get out of my clothes, then I would feel so much better. 

"Have you and Nicholas done it yet?" Her question almost made me choke on my drink, her eyes never leaving mine. 

Am I hearing this right? Does she mean th--- 

She slowly traced the rim of her wineglass while looking at me curiously, "What do you mean?" I asked.

"Did you have sex yet?" 

Her question slightly took me aback but answered, nonetheless. 

"N--no, we haven't. I'm still pure" 

The moment I said pure, a shadow seems to pass on her features as the corner of her lips slightly lifted sinisterly, barely noticeable in the dark. 

But I saw it... 

She snickered under her breath as she slightly swirled the wine in her glass. 

That's when I realized that she's never touched it. Not even a single drop. 

She followed my gaze to her wine glass before catching mine. Slightly tilting her head, she then smiled knowingly. 

She knows that I've noticed. 

I was starting to feel uncomfortable from this so I decided that it was time to retire for the night. But when I stood up, I was immediately met by sudden dizziness making me sit back on the couch ungracefully. 

It felt like my innards were being replaced by some kind of emptiness. I tried to stand again, desperate to leave this room. I swayed for just a moment before Agatha caught me. There was nothing I could do now, and as I slowly slumped sideways, she gently tugged on my shoulder, causing me to lie flat, with my head on her lap. Now all I could see was my fiance's mother smiling down at me… and the world went black. 

_=_=_ 

How long I was out, I’m not sure. I opened my eyes, and it took them a moment to adjust to the light.

Something was wrong. 

My arms could not move, despite my best efforts, and the air felt rather cold on my skin. And when my eyes adjusted, I immediately saw why. My wrists had been secured firmly in two straps, on either side of my head. And the cool air on my skin was because I'm completely naked! 

I tried to scream my lungs out, to shout for help, to do anything that might get me out of this situation. But the only thing that came out was a muffled sound. That has something to do with the gag placed over my mouth. But it did draw some attention to me because a figure suddenly appeared over my vulnerable form, and when it spoke, I heard the unmistakable voice of my fiance's mother. 

"So, you're finally awake" 

"I think before you try going off on one, I should probably introduce you to a bit of "context," I think you'd call it." She reached for the table next to her and picked up a remote. She turned on the TV that was positioned just above the bed I was strapped to. "Let's just say you might want to forget about struggling when I show you this video." 

My confusion made me forget my anger, for a moment. But as the film started, and what I was watching became clear to me, my anger was replaced by shock and horror. 

It was a video of me and my co-worker Tony, sitting in my office, and him kissing me. It had been a professional meet-up, he was showing me some files that we needed to sort out before the big presentation when out of the blue he just kissed me. I froze out of shock while his lips continued to press against mine but when I finally snapped out of it I immediately pushed him off me and gave him an ear-deafening slap on the face. But that wasn't shown in the film. It was just the kiss, making it look like I did it deliberately. I remembered him looking at me in pity like he was sorry for what he did. I didn't tell anyone about it, not even Nicky. And now my soon-to-be mother-in-law possesses proof of it.

But how? Why was there a video? Based on the angle I know it was filmed from a hidden camera. Was it done intentionally? For what reason?! Was she behind it? 

If someone got hold of it, I wouldn't just get fired from fraternizing with a colleague. I would probably lose Nicky as well. 

And that scared me shitless... 

Agatha pressed another button, and the video switched off. She looked at my face, now starting to become tear-stained and the fear now plain for everyone to see. She smiled. 

"I think that expression is a good one for you," she remarked. "It makes you look so sweet and innocent." 

She leaned over and planted a kiss on my cheek. I tried to jerk away but couldn't. The kiss practically seared my skin like molten lava. 

"Now that no one is going to disturb us, how about we get some fun done?" 

Agatha then began to touch me, and that was when I started to squirm a little. She moved her arms around my body, rubbing it in a very erotic way. "Aww… such a nice body, pet! I can't help myself but touch myself thinking about you every day. And now, I can't help myself anymore." She put a hand on my knee and began to gently stroke my leg. 

"What should I do first with your body?" She ran her finger on my smooth skin, before taking the gag off my mouth. 

I gritted my teeth from both anger and sadness. "Why are you doing this?" 

"Didn't I already tell you? I want your body to be mine! We are going to have so much fun, pet. And if you disobey me, I think you already know what will happen right? Not to mention, I can get  both of your parents fired, tsk... that would be unfortunate" 

A single tear ran on my cheek and Agatha kissed it, licking the drop. I know that I have no other choice but to let things happen. I have so much to lose if she doesn't get what she wants. 

She moved around and brought our lips together in a violent kiss, forcing her tongue past my gritted teeth. She bit my bottom lip hard enough to earn a gasp, allowing her to move her tongue past the barrier. 

The tongue quickly found its way around my mouth and explored every inch it could. In parallel to that, her hands moved around and groped my breast. She slightly massaged them and pinched the erected nipples. It was not that the events made me horny. It was the cold that made my body like that. 

The kiss ended after a while, me being out of air while the older woman was looking crazier than before. She licked her lips another time before stripping her shirt, skirt, and underwear away. She moved and kneeled in front of my face, her warmth being right on top of my face. "Eat up!" She said in a commanding voice, but I hesitated. The woman gritted her teeth in anger and grabbed my hair. "I ordered you to eat up!" She forced my mouth to get in contact with her entrance. 

Out of reflex, I attempted to close my mouth, but then felt a pair of forces crushing my head from both sides as her legs pressed me. The pain was enough to make me gasp. She took the opportunity to tighten her grip on my hair and pressed me harder. 

"That's more like it!" She started to move her body up and down, making my juice splash on my face. "Now, get that tongue of yours to work baby" She ordered and once again tightened the grip, forcing me to obey her order. 

I had to stick my tongue forward, forced to have a taste of the older woman. It was sweet and I can't stop myself from moaning from the taste of her. She also moaned at the feeling of my tongue inside her and moved faster until she cummed in my mouth. 

Just as I was about to let go of a sigh, my left leg was lifted, Agatha’s right leg sliding under it. "It is not the end yet! I still have a lot of things I want to teach your body." She pushed her hip forward, making our center meet.

I can't help but admit that it started to feel so good. The pleasure coursing through my veins like a blast of adrenaline... 

She repeated to thrush several more times, bringing our center together and making them part, and then collide again. She started to moan once again as I did the same, her hands starting to play with my breast, enjoying every contact through my body. Until my second orgasm was ripped from me this evening, followed by the beautiful temptress who laid on top of me while catching her breath from her release. 

She looked down on me in complete amusement as I lay helplessly underneath her. 

Agatha kissed the tip of my nose before sliding her warm body over me to reach something on the nightstand. When I saw what it was, my eyes grew wide as saucers... 

Oh no... please no more 

"P--please... I can't. It's too much" 

I struggled with my bonds as I tried to pull myself away from her. 

"Shhhh... I know you can. Just give mommy one more baby. I just need to taste you." 

She settled herself in between my legs, parting them by force. 

She reached between my legs and pushed something. The buzzing vibrator held against my clit sped up a notch, causing my back to arch. "Oh!" I gasped, head falling back. "Oh, oh—" 

Agatha cupped my left breast and mouthed at it, kissing and licking. I didn't know where to look but into her eyes, our foreheads practically touching on the pillow. 

I'm not sure what possessed me at the moment but I was suddenly desperate to taste her lips. 

"Kiss me," I begged. "Please..." 

And she did. Soft and sweet, holding me to her. Tugging my lip with her teeth and stroking my back, my butt. She took hold of my legs, cupping the underside of my knees. Bringing my legs around her waist, she rocked against me, teasing my lip with her tongue. 

I parted my lips for her, tasting her, sighing... Jolting when she tugged on my nipple. "Oh, ow, owie—, please don't—" 

I cried out with pleasure. This was so nice; it felt so good. 

She smiled at me. “You’ve got the prettiest pussy I’ve ever seen, pet,” she said, reaching to touch me, pulling back the hood of my clit so she could rub me with her thumb. I shivered. “Look at this tiny clit. So fucking cute, and all mine…” 

She proceeded to slide down my body until she was face to face with my dripping warmth. 

I gasped when she started to lick me and felt my stomach twitch, surprised and excited at Agatha’s eagerness to please me. I felt her tongue trace the outline of my lower lips and shuddered. A moment later, the older woman finally slid her tongue over my clit, and that's when I felt my walls clenching in a sudden spasm, screaming in pure pleasure for the third time. Due to the intensity, I blacked out. 

_=_=_ 

A groan left my lips when I woke up in the middle of the night with a sore body. 

Slightly stretching, that's when I realized that I was no longer chained to the bed and I was all alone in the room. 

Seeing this as an opportunity to get the hell outta here I immediately grabbed my clothes that were placed on the vanity chair before frantically dressing. 

No longer caring if I was dressed right I immediately ran towards the door but stopped when it suddenly opened, revealing my fiance’s other mother, Rio Vidal dressed in her expensive suit. 

"Ri-rio..." 

"Sweethear, what are you doing here?" Rio asked as she curiously surveyed my disheveled form. 

"Rio, you have to help me, please" I pleaded as I went closer to her. 

"Why? What's wrong?" She asked as she gently held my arm. 

"It's A–agatha, she---" 

"Hello, my love! You're home early," My words were cut off as Agatha appeared from the bathroom only covered by a plush purple robe. "It seems you caught our little bunny trying to hop away." She smiled devilishly... 

Wha-what? 

"Which is quite fortunate, I wouldn't want to miss out" Rio chuckled darkly. "But I'm very disappointed that you started without me, my love." 

"Well, you were late. It's been so long since I wanted a taste of her. I lost all self-control the moment I had her in my grasp. But don't worry, I saved the best for you." 

My eyes widened in realization and I felt my whole body shiver in fear as I heard the door's lock click. Locking me inside with two predators hungry for my young flesh... 

Nonononono... this isn't happening... 

Tears started to fall from my eyes as Agatha walked over to me, and Rio’s hand settled over my shoulders in a tight and almost painful hold. 

Agatha looked down on me with a predatory grin before slowly tilting my chin with her finger to meet her eyes. 

It was so dark and full of lust that it felt like I was about to drown in it. 

"Do you know the real reason why we let our son be with someone as lowly as you? It's because the moment we saw you, we knew that we needed to have you. Our perfect little toy." My heart ached from her words. So after all this time, I was nothing but a fool. 

"So here's what will happen from now on, you will get married to my son tomorrow and officially become part of our family. You will be a good wife to him and grant him the children he desires. But behind closed doors, you will become our pretty little pet and cater to our needs. Do you understand?" I nodded weakly.

"But the most important thing is... Nicky must never know about this little arrangement of ours. This secret will stay with you until you reach your grave, or else... I'm pretty sure you are aware of the power that we hold Y/N, if you go against us, we will destroy you and your loved ones. Do I make myself clear?" Her grip on my chin tightened, emphasizing how serious she was. 

"Ye-yes" I stuttered through gritted teeth. 

Agatha's eyes moved from behind me as Rio pressed her lips to my ear as she whispered... 

"If you behave like a good little girl for us, we will reward you with anything you desire, aside from your freedom of course." 

"Since that's all settled then, I think it's time for the main event" 

"Wh-what would that be?" I fearfully asked. 

Agatha smiled at me before leaning in close, her lips almost touching mine. 

"We're going to take your virginity baby"

_=_=_

Please don't forget to like, repost, and leave a comment below. I love hearing other peoples thoughts about this. Also, if you have any good ideas for a Dark fanfic featuring mother agatha please do send it. Thanks! 💜

[aledmorningstar]

╰┈➤Bad joke

Summary: Sukuna discovers that you don't like jokes.

Relationship: Ryomen Sukuna/Reader

Word count: 1.8k

Note: Slow updates, my editor and I are in a fight with my university administrators.

-‘๑’-: No curses au, uni au, sfw, humor, fluff, slight angst

The terrible hours of class had finally ended, the hard day of university had culminated its torture at 6:00 pm, every day you reconsidered the idea of ​​continuing studying so intensely, did you really need that university degree?

Without a doubt, life sounded more beautiful in an imaginary world, being a pretty housewife who patiently waited for her millionaire husband who loved her madly, your days would be spent helping your children with their homework and wasting an unreasonable amount of money on any whim.

“We've told you to stop daydreaming, it could be dangerous in the wrong places.”

Your daydream was interrupted by one of your best friends, it seemed like your group of friends had already finished putting away their belongings and were just waiting for you to leave the classroom.

"Oh I'm sorry. I was just thinking about the future."

“Is the young lady returning to the fantasy of married life with her impolite boyfriend?”

"Hey! I already told you not to talk about him like that."

You argue while you put your notebooks and computer in your bag, the one that your boyfriend Ryomen had given you on your birthday even though you told him that a gift was not necessary, you knew how difficult it must be for him and how limited which can sometimes be the money in your situation; his mother, playing the role of both parents and trying to provide a bright future for her children; Yuji, his twin who had to complete several courses to be a firefighter and also study a Bachelor's degree in automotive mechanics; and finally Ryomen himself, who had to complete his university career as a lawyer.

It was definitely not easy for him or his family, unlike you, who had lived the life of a princess in an imaginary bubble impenetrable by the dangers and worries of reality. Even though you had insisted on helping that modest family financially, you were not allowed to do so. Both Sukuna and his brother and mother refused to accept a cent of your generous support, saying that they did not want to take advantage of your kindness. That did not stop them from you gave expensive gifts to each one on special dates.

Maybe that was the reason behind that expensive gift from your boyfriend, one day he simply listened to you talk about that beautiful designer bag that was going to become fashionable with its next release on sale, he used all his savings and even did part-time jobs, washing cars, walking dogs, helping model clothes for the fashion design department; just to be able to see a cute and excited smile on your face.

You are a princess, the most beautiful flower he could find and of course he would give you everything you deserve, everything that fine society has given you and he does his best so that you do not have any lack by his side, to be worthy of you.

You didn't have the heart to tell him that you had pre-ordered that bag thanks to your father's contacts and that you had to refund it, angering some merchants for their wasted efforts.

“Hurry up, if we don't get to the cafe on time the tables will be full.”

Like every Friday you and your friends got together to talk about the latest news in your lives, your social circle was mostly made up of girls just as privileged as you, it wasn't difficult for your father to convince you to choose a career in law, much less make you enter one of the most demanding and prestigious schools in the country.

Your friends are good girls, you knew that otherwise you wouldn't have even looked at them; However, like you, they were overprotected and followed the sophisticated rules that society had imposed on them. This was one of the reasons why they didn't quite agree with your relationship with Ryomen Sukuna, a commoner in their eyes.

Like any conversation between friends, the topic of boys and relationships could not be avoided, a topic in which you came to light with your strange relationship of “opposite poles”, the little princess of the city and the delinquent of the campus, it was the funniest and most interesting experiment your friends could witness.

“So… How is our little princess's relationship going? Did he already ruin it?”

Of course there were going to be silly comments that doubted that your relationship was authentic and that waited for the slightest mistake from your boyfriend to shout in your face “I told you so.”

"No and he won't, you don't know my 'kuna"

“We know his history”

Even though all your friends were always supportive and kind to you, there was one in particular who wasn't very nice. Ann, always making sarcastic comments and believing herself to be better than everyone, everyone could see how jealous she was of you; She had been the last to join the group, one day you saw her alone and decided to integrate her into your group, unfortunately you never found the words to tell her that you no longer wanted to be her friend.

“Come on, darling, everyone here remembers how your relationship began.”

“He has changed, he is not the same person he was before, he is a new man”

Sure, your relationship may not have started off in the most convincing way possible, there were lies, misunderstandings and a lot of tears, but everything is different now. Now you have the romance that any girl could dream of, one full of love, affection and trust of those you only find in books, you would have your happily ever after.

“Well, I'll wait for your bad boy to do one of his things and don't say I didn't warn you.”

"When pigs fly, that's not going to happen"

The atmosphere had frozen in an awkward silence as you and Ann exchanged a big forced smile, it was strange to see you angry because of your sweet personality, but it would certainly be even stranger not to see you jump into an argument that included Ryomen Sukuna's name, you are his unofficial lawyer.

“Okay girls, let's talk about something else…”

╚═�� ❀•°❀°•❀ ══╝

You love Fridays, the best day of the week, since you could sleep over at your loved one's house and enjoy the weekend in his arms watching movies, doing puzzles, taking photos, listening to music, talking, watching videos, going out on dates, ordering takeout or even when he played a video game on the console and you were left coloring the pictures he printed for you (sometimes he needs his space).

That Friday the drawings were finished quickly, so you decided to watch some videos on your tiktok while Sukuna played a video game that you only knew had weapons because of the shots. The videos on your fyp were about pranks between couples (something that amused you), some light and others a little harsh.

Sukuna was someone who was a joker, someone who liked to make jokes but couldn't stand having one played on him; However, you were a couple, a slight joke between you could be kind of funny, it wasn't even a funny joke you just wanted to see how funny his reaction could be.

A message made Sukuna's phone ring, you thought it was the perfect time for your little act as you held back your laughter.

“Who is sending you so many messages? You have another girl, right?”

Your comment surprised Sukuna slightly, you weren't the jealous type, he looked at you for a split second and that was enough for him to know you were joking, he can play too.

"Oh my love. It's not even one girl, they´re five precious ones."

The amused smile that adorned your face disappeared in an instant, being replaced by a strange grimace, your eyes glistening from the tears that formed and that you refused to let go as you bit your trembling lower lip, preventing any sound.

"Really?"

“Of course, pretty. I'm too cool to stay with just one girl."

Memories of your conversation with Ann invaded your mind, Sukuna Ryomen had a past that was difficult to overcome, would he really change overnight for you?

Your boyfriend quickly realized that you had started packing your belongings back into your suitcase, why would you do that? The plan was that you would stay with him like every weekend, what was happening?

“Hey, what do you think you’re doing?”

Well, you had dropped a little bomb that exploded in your face and you didn't like it, but you wouldn't let him notice that it dealt a low blow at least for you.

“I'm just putting my things away. “Can you pass me my colored pencils?”

Sukuna decided to make the difficult decision to abandon his game and pay attention to the seemingly serious situation that was occurring with his beloved.

He did as you asked, you put away your colored pencils next to your other belongings with quick movements and finally wrote something furiously on your phone.

“I asked you a question, what are you doing?”

“Nothing… I'm asking my driver to come pick me up.”

"Now?"

“Yes, now. In fact I'm writing to him 'Please hurry up, I want to leave here right now, come as fast as you can'”

You could barely feel the force and speed with which Ryomen snatched the phone from your hands, he stood up and placed your phone on one of the highest pieces of furniture in the living room.

"Why would you do that?"

"What do you mean why? Did you hear what you said earlier?”

The hardest question you can ask a man, ask him the reason why his girlfriend was angry. The pink-haired man's reasoning quickly went to work.

Connect the dots, you had gotten angry within a period of 5 minutes, you weren't angry with him before that time, all he had done was play video games. Had that bothered you? No, he had given you drawings of your favorite characters to entertain you, the only thing he had done besides playing had been answering your joke... Oh.

“Ah, that's it.”

“Is that all you will say?”

Okay, a mental note for Sukuna: You like making jokes, you don't like having them made or returned to you. You're a crybaby, but he still loves you.

“Sorry, love, it was a joke. You know that I only love you, you are the only girl who occupies my heart, the owner of my soul and my body, I would kill for you, ask me to kill for you."

Ryomen approached to hug you from behind, he placed one of his hands on your abdomen and one on your shoulder, crossing your chest to bring you closer to him, you could feel his breath on your neck and after a few seconds you shivered from the kisses he gave you. he left on your cheek.

“I didn't find your joke funny.”

“In my defense, you started joking that I had another woman. You’re a baby, jokes aren’t your thing, darling.”

The look on your face made him feel like he had just kicked a puppy, his solution was to carry you back to the couch and hold you in his arms.

"I'm sorry baby. You can choose the movie we watch today, deal?”

"Deal"

⋆·˚ ༘ *🔭 master list is here

[catskets]

From Desires to Demo: How to Write a Good Demo for your Visual Novel

I'm deciding I want to expand on some topics in longer, fuller-length posts based on points I made in this general VN development post.

There is a problem that players have expressed to me about visual novel demos, especially in horror/romance/yandere circles these days: they are not demos at all. Rather, they feel like introductions to the characters and the setting, and nothing happens at all. No one wants to have to go find out everything good about your game by going to your Tumblr and going through 10+ months of asks to get themselves hyped up for your game. Most people are not going to do that. They will instead play your demo and go "this isn't enough for me to come back to" and never think about it again.

How, then, do you get people playing your demo and being excited for the full game? This is my personal guide on how to make a compelling visual novel demo.

In case you've never heard of me, I'm Kat, also known as catsket. I have a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Game Design. I've been making games for nearly 5 years, and I've been doing visual novels more "professionally" for 2. You may know me for Art Without Blood, 10:16, God is in the Radio, or Fatal Focus. I'm here to help you make your first visual novel, or, perhaps, improve on what you've already made.

What is the purpose of a demo?

A demo is short or a demonstration. Your job is to demonstrate a portion of your game to players. In more "traditional" games, a demo typically takes place in a very tightly-constricted space that is meant to show off how the game feels. Maybe this is the first few levels of a platformer that showcases the general atmosphere and gameplay of the game.

We aren't making action and adventure games in explorable spaces. We are making visual novels. Most visual novel demos just showcase a small portion of the game, maybe the first few scenes.

What your demo should have is this:

A general vibe for your game. You're writing a psychological horror game. Give me a taste of that! Show me a bit of the gore, a bit of the horror.

A sense of urgency. A lot of demos I've played and discarded have been discarded because the game itself does not give me a motivation

An established plot. What is going to happen in the future? Why am I in this world?

In general, think of your game as the back cover of a book. That's where the hook that draws you in to read it. Just give me a proper taste of your game!

There are cases in traditional games where things are hidden from the player in demos (let's all remember MGS2) and where things are changed in from the demo to the final product. That's perfectly okay! You are not obligated to update your demo unless you find gamebreaking bugs and other issues. If things change from the demo to the final product, let your players be surprised and intrigued by these changes!

I can make this a list of do's and don'ts:

Before writing your demo...

Do: Outline, plan, and everything else.

Unless you're blessed by Mnemosyne herself, you need to outline where your story is going to go.

When starting a project, I write a 1-2 page document that has this information:

Name of the game

The target audience

The genre and moods

A paragraph summary of the game

1-2 sentences describing main characters and their roles

Write a short scene that captures the essence of the game

Write a basic outline. You don't need to fit everything in and outline it all, but give yourself an idea. A beginning, a middle, a climax, and an end. Some people just write the start and the finish, and then the middle gets all muddled and convoluted.

While writing your demo....

Do: Make it clear how the choices will impact the game

Visual novels are a medium where player choices affect the game. Make sure those choices actually matter. They don't all have to, of course. They might matter later in the game, but you should at least try to write an example of how a choice may matter.

For example, in Art Without Blood's new demo, certain choices mean you meet the characters in a different order and experience different sides of them.

Having a certain amount of a sanity stat will cause characters to give you some flavor text.

Here's a very simple idea: if you're running your game on a "love points" or other points system, you can make it so if player gets 10 points with love interest, get a different scene. It shows that your choices are impactful. Just let players have a taste of the consequences of their actions.

Don't: Character dump.

Many demos I have played were just character dumps. This means using the demo just to introduce to us the characters but not giving them room to truly show their personalities or their attachments to the problem.

For example, I played a game recently that had the player complaining about their living situation, showing us the characters in the same living complex, showed off the yandere, and then had the player deal with an annoying, evil boss. That sounds like lots of games, right? And that doesn't sound very fun, does it?

Do: Ground the player in the world

Try to immerse your player character in your world. I want to read like I'm part of it. What is our purpose? If we are a stranger, how can you immerse us in a world so far removed from ours?

Do it slowly, and do it with necessity. You don't necessarily want an exposition dump either.

Establish the world, establish the conflict, establish why they got into this conflict, and leave us off with a reason to come back.

Don't: Make your players have to visit other sites to get important information

Your ask blogs or other social medias should contain supplemental material that keeps players engaged, but it should not be a place where you should go "well, actually, in the demo, x y and z should have happened but it didn't."

Try not to spoil your game on your socials. What's the point of playing if I can just read it all on your blog?

I should learn about the plot and the characters from the game itself. I should not have to get a sense from your blog about a character because they were so dry in the demo.

Obviously, this isn't to say you need to include everything about a character in your demo. But we need to get a sense of personality. I shouldn't have to go to Tumblr to find that personality.

Do: Ask for help

Making a game on your own, especially for the first time, is scary. It's okay to ask for help. It's okay to get people to help you out with parts you aren't so familiar with. It doesn't make you any less of a developer. A lot of people need some degree of help. There is nothing wrong with that.

Don't: Start your marketing until you know you can finish the demo

I've seen lots of demos that have been in the works for years. It can be disappointing for fans and demotivating for the developer to have an idea, tell the world, and then not see a demo for a long time. This is especially the case when money is involved, but it's still irresponsible to promise a product and never deliver it. Be honest about the status of projects and your life.

Do: Outline content warnings properly

It is up to the player to decide if they think they're capable and ready to play your game. Make sure to outline your content warnings. Cover the basics, and feel free to leave an extended warnings list in your game or on your game page for specifics.

Content warnings are usually things like blood/violence, profanity, sexual content, etc. Trigger warnings typically get into specific things, like suicide, dentists, or religious trauma. Think of content warnings like the ERSB.

Put a splash screen before the game starts that showcase the content warnings and a place to find trigger warnings.

Don't: Pull back punches with what your characters are capable of

It's fiction. It doesn't necessarily mean you support your characters being crazy stalkers. Know the audience you want to write for, and don't feel a need to cower. Let them be filthy. Let them get their hands deep into someone's chest cavity and rip a body apart.

What I'm trying to say is you really shouldn't tone down what you think your characters are capable of because you're afraid of making fans sad or upset because pookie isn't acting the way they thought pookie acted in their head. It's your character. You're commanding the story. You are choosing where it goes, not fans. Just because you have an audience doesn't mean you need to tone it down to be more palpable to others.

Once your demo is released...

Do: Keep a balance

Making games is very, very hard. And the world is very, very harsh. It is okay to let your fans know about delays or potential cancellations, such as through the devlogs on itch.io for your game, in your community spaces, or on your blog. Please be honest. If you do not think that, after a demo's release, you can continue on the project, make it clear that it has been cancelled or on hiatus.

People will be understanding. The world sucks, and it sucks the life out of us. People are more forgiving if you are honest with the status of your game, rather than leaving it in a perpetual limbo.

Don't: Think that the popularity of your demo constitutes how "good" your game is.

Your demo may not do well. That could be a number of factors. Maybe your marketing didn't hit where you think it should have. Maybe you posted it at the same time as another game. Not your fault. The full release may do better. Don't let the numbers be the reason you give up.

Do: Network!

Get to know fellow developers in the space so you can learn from one another and get more ideas for improving your own games.

Don't: Use developers.

Use a developer's resources. You should not be making friends with other devs if your desire is to try and become friends with big people. That's a parasocial relationship, buddy!

Do: Tell your fans the course of action

Do you have a development timeline set up? Writing multiple days? Give fans a general outline that you planned before writing your demo. It's okay to miss things as long as you're honest. But a timeline will help you hold accountability for yourself.

Don't: Charge for it.

I've seen at least 3 games take the "I'm going to charge for a demo" route in an effort to sway children from playing the game. This is going to sway everyone. Especially if players have not seen a complete + finished product from you, they will not be buying an unfinished game. There are other ways to hide your games from children, such as using itch.io's adult content filters and applying them to your projects.

Main takeaway: Be honest.

I say this a lot throughout this post, but it's because it pushes on a particular trend I see in beginner visual novel developers. There's this desire to create, but there is also the desire for fandom centered around what characters and world spawn from your creations. To maintain that fandom, you need to create. You need to be consistent. It may be harsh, but it's the reality.

Life is hard, and a large majority of us are NOT doing this for a living. Life will get in the way. It always has, it always will.

That's why it's good to practice integrity. Know yourself and your limits. Take steps back and be willing to be open + honest.

Fans won't be happy if you keep saying a game is delayed and show little to no work. Posting unrelated artwork and spending months answering Tumblr asks instead of making a game will eventually run you in the mud without anyone to enjoy what you have the potential to create.

Live up to your promises, and if you can't, be honest. Your community will support you as long as you're open.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for getting tubal ligation, eloping with my two girlfriends, adopting a cat and moving out, all in two weeks and without telling my mother?

🏥💍🐈🏠

So, I (F, 21) have been planning for a long time to sort out my life. I live in a European country, I'm in college and work part-time. For years, I've been saving up money to get financially independent as fast as possible and move out of my parents' apartment. I also wanted to have enough to pay for tubal ligation procedure, because I don't ever want children and would feel much more at ease when I'm certain that I can't physically get pregnant. My mother from the beginning was very against that idea, telling me I'll change my mind later and not to do anything permanent.

Two years ago, I've met two wonderful women, A (26) and K (23) on a discord server dedicated to our shared hobby (writing fanfiction). We'd been talking and messaging for months, eventually creating our own server and sharing our irl names and faces. It naturally progressed to a point where we chose to call it a relationship (I'm on the aroace spectrum, we're all neurodivergent and have a weird relationships with gender so it's not a traditional romantic/sexual relationship by any means). We're all from the same country so we met up a few times before deciding to all move to one city and live together. K and I are finishing our bachelor's degrees and A works from home so there weren't any obstacles. We found a flat and A moved in, waiting for me and K.

My mother knew I was bisexual and dating A and K, but thought again that it was "just a phase" and that we were only friends pretending to date for some reason. I love my parents, they are great and supportive people but sometimes it can be so exhausting to convince them of something when they believe they're absolutely right. So, I just stopped talking to my mother about my relationship and plans for the future. I visited A (and K after she moved in) in our apartment without permanently staying there yet.

A, K and I got an idea to celebrate us finishing college and A getting a job promotion by going abroad for a week. K jokingly suggested that we could visit another country and get married (gay marriage is still illegal in our country). Obviously, polyamorous marriages are not legal anywhere in Europe, but A told us at the beginning of our relationship that she never wanted to get legally married for personal reasons (but a non-binding marriage ceremony was fine with her). So, all three of us could have a ceremony and K and me could get legally married (the marriage still wouldn't be legally recognized in our country though). Then I also realized that I could get a tubal ligation in the country which we wanted to travel to (tubal ligation procedure is also illegal in our country).

I knew my mother would be against both of those decisions and I didn't want to argue with her the entire time before I left abroad. So, I just told her I'm going on holidays with my two friends for a week and she accepted that. I've also been slowly moving a lot of my stuff from my room in my parents' apartment to our apartment and was ready to completely relocate.

Anyway, the wedding went great (the witnesses were six people we knew from the discord server where we first met, who lived close by and could get to the wedding site easily), my operation went great, the trip was great, and just as we returned a friend asked if we wanted a kitten, because their cat had recently had some. We agreed.

When I was sure everything was settled, I called my mother and told her about the wedding, the operation, the move and the kitten. She was shocked and angry, said she felt disappointed and betrayed I hadn't told her about any of my plans, didn't even invite her to the wedding and that I damaged my body and would regret having my tubes tied. I tried explaining that I didn't know how she would react, that based on our previous interactions I hadn't thought she'd be supportive and that I wanted make my decisions without also having endure her disapproval. She cried, told me I hurt her and to give her some time to deal with all the revelations.

I feel terrible for upsetting my mom, but honestly, I think I did the right thing and that informing her beforehand would've ruined my mood and I'd have had to argue with her on the phone constantly during the trip.

So, Tumblr, AITA?

[creedslove]

hello mari!!

i hope i won't be asking for too much but can i have some javi p as confused dad girl? (for example reader is with her family in the other state and javi has to take care of his little princesa because she has a cold) i feel like this would make my day better especially when i'm sick (my fever is driving me crazyyy)

Javier Peña x f!reader

A/N: ohhh it's alright baby, I'm sorry it took me a couple of days to get it done 🥺 I hope you're feeling better by then baby, if you aren't just take care of yourself and message me whenever you want 🥺❣️ love you 💞

"¿Qué pasa mariposita?"

• Javi sighed as he sat on the edge of the bed that was way too small for him and watched as his daughter's sad and glossy eyes stared at him after coughing her tiny little heart out

"I don't feel well daddy"

• Analuz pouted as Javi nodded and placed his hand on her forehead, feeling how feverish her skin was and the realization was that his precious mariposita was sick

• when you had to travel for a couple of days and leave town in order to see your family, Javi had the task of taking care of your little toddler and he was sure it would be a weekend full of fun and it was until his sweet baby girl woke up with a nasty cough, fever and a sore throat

• Javi refused to believe it had anything to do with the fact Analuz and himself spent the whole Saturday swimming in the pool and having ice cream, after all, Javier Peña was sure there wasn't such a thing as too much swimming pool and ice cream

• so Javi turns into full dad mode and he's ready to help his beautiful princess; the first thing he does is to go after the tylenol and medicate his sweet princess

• then, he takes her to the couch, wrapped into her favorite warm blanket and puts on whatever she wants to watch: cartoons, disney movies, videos about animals, his princess got it all

• and then Javi had to remember his old Colombian era, in which he was a single man living in a bachelor pad and he had to cook his own meals in order to prepare his beautiful daughter some soup

• and even if it wasn't as good as the ones you often made it, Analuz loved it, because it was her daddy who had prepared it for her and she thought it was delicious

• she asked him for a hot chocolate mug and even if Javier knew he shouldn't give her chocolate, he figured her tummy was fine, so why not

• they finished Sunday cuddled up on the couch, Javi and his precious mariposita drinking some hot chocolate and watching a princess movie

• Analuz her had tiny fingers gripped into her daddy's shirt as she rested against his chest, her breathing was calm and her eyes were so heavy even if she tried fighting sleep

• he took her to bed and kissed her forehead, wishing his beautiful daughter goodnight and going to bed; he phoned you and told you all about their weekend, the good and the bad part

• you praised him and assured him he was a great dad and you were so proud of him, and Javi told you how much Analuz and himself missed you

• you said goodbye and went to bed, knowing you'd be back to your family in a couple of days even if it felt too long to be away from them ❣️

____

[kfedup]

Regretsy no more

Hey, y'all. It's the lurker here.

I've been in the funkiest of funkless funks for the past few months and over the past few weeks, I've been unpacking why. Seeing how much I'm isolating because of a constellation of health-related issues and generalized depression. Have been considering trying meds. But one thing keeps coming to the surface and I finally decided it's time to deal with it.

The one thing is the only thing in my life that I regret. That thing is never having finished my bachelor's degree.

I'm twice divorced, have lost several important friendships, and moved more times than I can count to places I didn't really want to live to maintain relationships I should have never entered in the first place, but I wouldn't trade any of those things. I don't feel regret about them. Why would I? I discovered who I am and who I am not because I experienced those things. Each of them allowed me to learn how to repair what's possible and how to let go of that which is complete.

I'm very good at this marketing copywriting work but I'm bored senseless. I want to challenge myself and taking online workshops is fine but it's just more interacting through a screen and lord love a duck, my spirit needs more. Plus, I am not using my gifts of communication, empathy, mirroring, and holding space for others in the way I know I am meant to use them. For two years I've felt like I'm wasting what's left of my life.

I am so afraid I will die full of this regret.

The cost has kept me from pulling the trigger on this dream for several years. I wish I started sooner, but clearly, I wasn't miserable enough yet. I'm well and truly stuck in the muck at the bottom of the lake about it now. There's nothing left to do but swim to the surface, so here I go.

Today I applied as a transfer student to the Psychology program at Kent State University to start classes this summer. It will probably take me 3 years to finish the 2 years I have left because I'm a single-income household and will have to work. I'm terrified I won't be able to manage both, but I hope I can rally.

I'm not sure if I'll continue on to get the Psych MA at KSU or go elsewhere to get an MA in Art Therapy after I finish the BA. I also want to get certified in Internal Family Systems therapy, so I'll be 63ish or older starting a new career as a therapist and I feel excited about my future for the first time in... well... I don't even know. A very long time.

I want a career that feels meaningful to me, helps people instead of businesses, and lets me use my gifts. One I can do until I'm dead because I'mma need to work until they're spreading my ashes.

I plan to take a class this summer to dip my toes in.

Holy shit, y'all. Lila will be a senior and I will be a junior on the same campus. She's so supportive and I've been crying happy-scared-overwhelmed-curious-excited tears all day.

Kelly's going back to college. Holy shit.

[junipers-archive]

Are Saturdays for Spencer sill on going? If it is can I please ask for a Spencer x Ballerina!reader? Where they both are old childhood friends and she was Spencer's first kiss but had moved away due to him going to college and her because of dance and met each other again when the BAU were investigating a case at her dance company and they hate it each other because of a misunderstading and could they have lots of sexual tension and make up in the end. I love your works. Keep up the great job 🥰 and congrats to your new milestone 🥳

Wow, ok I'm going to try to fit this all into one blurb but wonderful idea!! Thank you for sending and thank you for reminding me ab this! ( I'm glad to have reached the milestone with all of you!)

You'd moved away once the both of you had finished college, earning a bachelor's in fine arts you'd been offered a job at a prestige dancing studio up state. Spencer hadn't understood, the plan was to move into together, live in the same apartment as you took on separate jobs. You weren't supposed to lose touch.

You'd been childhood best-friends since as long as you could remember, both having crushes on the other at some point and then again during college. You never acted it on it though, both acknowledging you'd rather be friends than break the bond by becoming more than that.

You regretted it in your time apart, always knowing that guys like Spencer only existed in one in a million.

You'd never expected to see him again, at least not when a serial killer was killing dance students/teachers around your age range. That was the reason he'd visited you, albeit he wasn't as enthusiastic as he was years before.

"Y/n you need to quit your job. Or you need to go into protective custody. You're exactly the type of girl this guy is looking for!" He had stormed into your apartment once again after his team had found another body, this time the woman had the same physical attributes as you.

"I can't just uproot my entire life Spence! I've made a name for myself here, I have respect! I can't get that anywhere else!" You'd been through this conversation a hundred times since he'd been assigned the case.

"Look I'm just looking out for you." He'd towering over you know and despite yourself you were this close to leaning into his touch as you look up at his big brown eyes. "You are-were- you were my bestfriend not too long ago."

You frown at that, you are his best-friend, no amount apart would ever change that. "I look out for myself Spence, I'm a woman living alone, you don't think I take precautions?"

"Of course I do, but that only makes you a bigger target. This guy- he's dangerous! You could get hurt- or worst you could-"

"Why do you even care?" It hurt him that you had to ask but he knew you had the right to, the last conversation you'd had before you left for the job had ended in a screaming match. Only for you to end up in the same city as him, yet never once had he tried to contact you.

"I just-" might as well come out in say it, he'd waited his entire life to confess maybe you'd stop being so stubborn if he did.

"I was in love with you before you left. I still love you. Y/n you were my entire life! We'd spent every waking moment with each other, and then you got accepted to the same school as me! God knows I would've gone anywhere you went. I just, I fell in love with you and then you told me you were leaving. You broke my heart."

You were speechless, utterly and stupidly speechless at a time you shouldn't have been. Which gave him the oppurtunity to continue.

"That's why I care. Y/n I still love you, after all these years you are what matters most to me. And this unsub he's not one we've seen before. He's meticulous and god knows what he could do to you if-"

Although words don't come over you, actions do, you pull him in by his tie pressing you lips softly against his and he relaxes into your touch.

When you pull back you find your voice, "You couldn't have said that a few years ago?! Jesus, I was in love with you too idiot!"

He chuckles at your choice of insult, "No one ever calls me an idiot."

Your roll your eyes playfully shoving him slightly, "Yea well you deserve it. But I guess, I could take a leave of absence, but only for a little while! Just until you catch this guy."

He pulls you into him by the waist band of your jeans loops, tugging you until you're so close to him you can feel all of him,

"You know, you live pretty close to me now, we could always resume where we left off, you could move in, like we always planned."

"Wow, my idiot has brains." You really were the only one to ever call him that.

[tia-amorosa]

Sunset Died - Bachelor/Clavell/Wan

A little Surprise

While Xander and Pauline are mentally preparing to raise a child together soon, classes have just finished at school and most of the children are heading home. Only Peter, Michael and his sister have stayed to do their homework.

“Bye, Bella, see you tomorrow"/ ‘o.k….’. Mortimer was in a hurry to get home. Because he had planned a competition with Stiles the day before: who could build the most snowmen in the front garden. He had been looking forward to it all morning and could hardly wait for lessons to finish.

“I think I saw Dr. Wolff going to our house this morning"/ ‘what do you think she wanted?’/ ‘Well, I suppose to make a house call’/ ‘maybe about the baby?’/ ‘It's possible…’/ ‘Oh, the little girl must be fine’/ ”the little girl? How do you know it's a girl?"/ ‘uh… I, I don't know, I just think it is’/ ‘hnhn, well well’.

“Pauline doesn't have a bed for the baby yet. I've been thinking the whole time whether we could maybe build one for her"/ ‘Yes, that's a great idea…I'm sure she'd love it’/ ”OK, let's get everything together for it after school. We're sure to have some fabric and wood left at home”

“and I still have some old toys that I no longer need. She'll get that too“/”yes, great. She's always been there for us over the last few months, now we should return the favor“/”do you think the baby might come at Christmas?“/”hm, maybe, but maybe later“/”hmm…”.

Bella had been thinking for days about what Christmas would be like this year. But she wasn't the only one with these thoughts, many others were too. There probably won't be a big Christmas tree or presents this year. So much has been missing since the catastrophe and the death of her parents. But maybe at some point you learn to appreciate other things instead of just material things.

Later. It was already evening when the children came home. And they quickly noticed that the mood in the house was different than usual. “Hello kids, ready for a winter salad a la Xander?"/ ‘You've made this before, what's different about it now?’/ ‘hmm, good question, it's actually the same as what I've put in before’/ ‘hnhn… What did Dr. Wolf want here this morning?’.

“She just wanted to check up on me again and there were still a few things to sort out. Now we can relax and look ahead"/ Michael had a hunch what her statement might be about. Because sometimes, when the adults were talking, he would secretly stand around the corner and listen…. But he didn't let his knowledge show… “o.k…. Sounds good… How much longer will it take to eat?"/ ‘A little longer…’/ ‘Good, then please don't come upstairs, it could get louder’.

Peter helped Michael and his sister carry some materials upstairs to the bedroom. Afterwards, Xander and Pauline heard the loud banging of a hammer and a few other noises that could be associated with manual work. “What are they doing?"/ ‘I don't know, but hopefully not breaking everything’.

After about half an hour, the children came back downstairs. Peter didn't stay for dinner this time, he had to help with some things at home that evening. “What have you been doing up there all this time?"/ ”You'll see when you go to bed later. Just a little surprise"/ ‘a surprise?’.

“Yes, for you two and the baby. But I won't say any more”. Xander looked at her, still a little puzzled, as he had no idea what she meant. “aha, I can't wait to see it/ “when's the baby coming then?”. Pauline looked at her and smiled. Bella seemed to be really looking forward to the little new addition to the house. “It'll take a while, sweetie, but you can tell her a few stories and she'll get used to your voice"/ ‘I'll do that, yes’.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

When Xander and Pauline came into the bedroom later, it was indeed a surprise for them. But certainly not a small one. “My God, look at this…”. She slowly pointed her finger at the crib. “I always underestimate the kids, they're more capable than I am,” Xander said, stroking his own head a little sheepishly. “That's so sweet of them.”. Pauline was very touched, she hadn't expected anything like this.

“I think we'll have to say thank you tomorrow. “/ “Mhm. The only question now is how things should continue here in the future. It's not a good environment here for a new generation.” Xander had also been thinking for some time about how the new children would grow up here. “That's true… I really hope we get help soon. The supplies won't last forever…”. After looking at the crib for a moment, the two of them went to bed. It had been quite an exciting day.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

@greenplumbboblover

[springsteenicious]

Pieces of a Harmony

part one of my draft clean out is chapter one of a fic I abandoned called Pieces of a Harmony! don't know why I called it that!

The original idea for this was to be a band AU. If anyone remembers when I was toying around with a fic called Add It Up, this is my restarted draft of that. But I don't where I was going with it and I have no idea what I'm doing with all the stuff I wrote for Add It Up. If you want to learn more about that fic, look at my tag for it.

In this story, Donna is marrying my OC Jack O'Connor (WTOE). Eric went to NYU and met the people he will later start a band with, and the character Jenna you will meet here is his intended love interest since Donna is married. Hyde and Jackie reunite at the wedding.

Word Count: 3,064

Pairings: Hyde/Jackie, Donna/Jack, Eric/Jenna

1985 

Hyde raised his hand to knock on the front door when Donna poked her head out the window right next to it. “Don’t knock!” she shouted. “I just painted the door.” 

He lowered his hand. “Okay. Can you let me in?” 

“Yeah, one second.” Donna went back in the window and a moment later, the door opened. Hyde went in. 

“How’s it going? Where’s Jack?” 

“Jack is figuring out what’s wrong with the bathroom sink. If you want to help him, follow the sound of angry Gaelic muttering.” Donna gestured vaguely up the stairs. 

Hyde nodded and went up, Donna behind him. “Everything else good? You like the house?” 

“Yeah, I do. I’m glad we’re moving in before the wedding. I would have been stressed the whole honeymoon if we still didn’t have a house.” 

“I’m glad you moved too, I was getting sick of having you in my apartment,” Hyde teased. He walked into the bathroom, where Jack was hunched by the sink, cursing at a pipe.

Donna touched his shoulder lightly. “What did I tell you about straining your leg?” 

He looked up at her. “That I shouldn’t do it?” 

“Mhm. Now stand up, Hyde’s gonna fix the sink.” 

Jack used the sink as leverage to stand up. Hyde took his place under the sink. "You got a wrench?" Donna handed him the wrench, and he sealed a loose pipe. "Try that." 

Jack turned on the sink, and the water came out. "Damn. I should just stop trying to fix things around the house, it never works out." 

"How's this: I'll fix stuff, and you can cook," Donna suggested with a smile. 

"I was gonna cook anyway," Jack said. "But that sounds wonderful, a chroí." 

"No one makes me feel more single than you two," Hyde said. "Anyway, I came to help you move in. And to tell you that Forman finally called me back and said he's coming to the wedding, with a plus one." 

Donna smiled. "Does he have a girlfriend? Boyfriend?" 

"No. He's bringing this girl from NYU who he's just friends with. He was very adamant about that on the phone." 

Donna laughed. "Same old Eric." She looked at Jack. "Did Emmeline ever call you back?" 

"Yeah. She said she can't make it. Her sister's pregnant and due around the time of the wedding, so she'll be in Truro with her sister." 

"I love it when you say Truro. Your accent just…" Donna shook her head, clearing the thought. She looked at Hyde. "Are you all packed?" 

"Yup. Finished this morning. I'm excited, I've never been out of the country." 

Donna and Jack were getting married in Ireland. Jack's whole family- minus his sister- lived there, so it was easier to get the whole O'Connor part of the wedding attendees there. Donna only wanted to invite her immediate family and friends, so she was fine with that. It would also be easier for them to get to their honeymoon destination in Italy. 

"Jackie's excited?" Hyde asked. 

"Out of her mind," Donna said. "She said she's been calling Jack's sister non-stop to figure out my bachelorette party. She wants it to be better than the last one." 

Hyde chuckled. "Of course." 

"You sure it won't be awkward?" Donna asked, not for the first time. 

Hyde gave her a look. "Jack's inviting your ex to his bachelor party. I can handle seeing Jackie for a few days." 

Donna turned on Jack. "I told you that you didn't have to invite him." 

"I wanted to," Jack said. "He's cool. Besides, he and Hyde are still friends. It'll be fine." He pressed a kiss to the side of Donna's face. "It's going to be great, and we're going to be married soon, and then we'll be enjoying kickass food in Italy." 

Donna smiled a little. "You always know what to say, Sunshine." Jack blushed a little. 

"Aww," Hyde crooned. "You have anything else you need me to fix?" 

They both looked back at Hyde. Jack nodded. "The water heater needs to be set up." 

"I'm on it." 

~

Hyde stood in the foyer of the O'Connor house, helping Donna greet people. Jack was catching up with his family. They'd offered to have everyone over for dinner the night before the wedding. 

The door opened, and Forman walked in. "Oh, thank God, I have the right house," he said. "Hi, guys!" 

Donna gaped at him. "What happened to your hair? I haven't seen you in five years." 

Forman's hair was much longer, falling to his chest. He'd started growing it out a few years ago. He opened his mouth to answer, but a woman pushed him aside so she could enter the house. "You're blocking the door, Forman." 

She had tan skin and short, wavy hair. She had a lot of piercings in her ears and she was wearing an oversized button-down over her Van Halen shirt. "Sorry," Forman said. He looked at Donna and Hyde. "This is Jenna Somers, a friend from college." 

She nodded. "What's up?" 

The door opened again, and Jackie walked in. Hyde hadn't seen her in five years. Her hair was longer, but she looked mostly the same. She went straight to Donna, wrapping her in a tight hug. "Donna! This is so exciting! You're finally getting married to a good guy!" 

"Rude," Forman said. "I'm a great guy. Just not right for Donna." 

Jenna shrugged. "You're a pretty okay guy." 

He frowned at her. "I should've brought Reese as my plus one. Reese would've been supportive of me." 

Jackie separated herself from Donna. "Where's Jack?" 

"Where do you think? He's in the kitchen." 

"I gotta go talk to him. We haven't seen each other in forever." Jackie flounced off to the kitchen. 

"They're friends?" Hyde asked. 

"Yeah. Jackie visited me a bunch when I was living in Yarmouth with him, they got along really well. He helped her after her last breakup." 

"She's dated other people?" Hyde asked, somewhat surprised. He knew it was outrageous to assume that she hadn't seen anyone else, but he hadn't heard anything about it. 

"I'm so confused, man," Jenna said. 

"It's soooo much to explain," Forman said. "Let's go find somewhere to sit so I can try and catch you up." The two of them left the room. 

The door opened again, and Midge came in with a man Hyde had never met. "Oh, hi, Donna! Hello, Steven. This is my boyfriend, Jon. I met him in California." 

"Nice to meet you," Jon said. He had wavy brown hair and a thick mustache. "Donna, is your dad coming?" 

"Yeah. He's, um… Not seeing anyone right now. So try not to rub it in his face, please, mom." 

"Why would I do that? I don't want to rub anything in his face, he's all oily." Midge smiled. "Where's Jack's mother? I wanted to talk to her, y'know, mother to mother."

"I don't know how well that's gonna go. She doesn't speak a lot of English. You're better off talking to Jack's dad." 

"But I don't want to talk to his dad, I want to talk to his mom!" 

"Why don't you go ahead, love, I'll be right there," Jon said, lightly pushing Midge towards the hallway. She walked off, leaving Jon alone with them. "I've learned to just let her do what she says she's gonna do. She figures it out eventually." 

"How do you manage to do it?" Hyde asked. Donna gave him a look. "It's a valid question, Donna, the woman can't follow a conversation for even a minute." 

"Patience. I just let her talk and support her ideas. And I love her a damn lot, which is really necessary at times." Jon focused on Donna. "So, what languages does your soon-to-be mother in law speak?" 

"Irish, Scots Gaelic, and Italian. Her father is Italian and her mother is Scottish, then they moved to Ireland when she was young, so she speaks a lot of languages." 

"I know a little bit of Italian, so we'll see how it goes," Jon smiled brightly, clapped Hyde on the shoulder, did the same to Donna, then walked down the hall. 

"He's definitely… a step dad kind of guy," Hyde said. 

"Shut up," Donna said, laughing. "We should probably make sure there are no major inter-family issues before the wedding." She walked after Jon, and Hyde followed her. 

~

"You're getting married! This is so exciting!" Jackie hugged Donna tightly from behind. Donna smiled. "And your marriage is gonna go so much better than mine, I can feel it." 

"No offense, but it would be really hard for my marriage to go worse than yours." 

"Oh, so Jack's not planning on running away to the Bahamas?" 

"I don't think so, no." 

"Then I can almost guarantee you won't get divorced." Jackie laughed. "I really am happy for you, though. Jack's a great guy, I can tell he really loves you." 

"Yeah. Y'know, I'm not even nervous," Donna said. 

"That's good." 

Meanwhile… 

Hyde and Cal were patting Jack's back as he nearly hyperventilated in the back of the church. "Man, what's wrong with you?" Cal asked. 

"Why is she marrying me? All I have to offer is disabilities. I get a beautiful, intelligent, wonderful woman and she gets a guy with one leg and PTSD. This hardly seems fair," Jack said. 

"Well, we should call the wedding off, then," Hyde said. "I mean, why would Donna almost marry you with that reasoning? And to think she really loves you." 

Cal took a less subtle route. "You're being a fucking dumbass. She loves you, PTSD and all. She wouldn't have said yes to the engagement if she didn't. And you're not less than any other guy 'cause of your disabilities, fuckwit." 

"Exactly," Hyde said. "My ex-wife was legally blind. She could still see, but… y'know, she wasn't allowed to drive." 

Jack chuckled. "Ah, so that's how you managed to get married." 

Hyde smiled. "See, you can do this. You love Donna, Donna loves you. Soon, you're gonna be married and you won't even be thinking about these worries you have now." 

Jack nodded. "Okay. Okay. I can do this." 

"That's the spirit!" Cal clapped him on the back. "And Hyde, save a dance for me after the wedding." 

"Of course. I'm gonna go find my seat." 

~

Eric sat next to Jenna in one of the church's pews. Jenna was wearing a black dress, and she looked beautiful. Eric wasn't about to say that to her, though. 

"Is it weird, being at your ex's wedding?" Jenna asked. 

Eric shrugged. "Not really. I'm happy for her. I'm glad I didn't marry her." 

"Me too," Jenna said. 

He snapped his head in her direction, about to ask what she meant by that, when the wedding procession music started. They all stood and turned to see Jackie walk down the aisle and stand on the opposite side of Jack and his sister Cal. Then Donna came down, wearing her mom's old wedding dress. She looked radiant, and she looked happy. 

Jack smiled brightly when she came up to meet him. Everyone took their seats again, and the ceremony began. 

Before Eric knew it, they were at the vows. 

"Jack… You brighten my life. You always know how to make me smile, and you know what to say when I feel down. You're my closest friend. You know me better than anyone else. I love every part of you, even the parts you don't love about yourself. I vow to love you for as long as we live." 

Jack was blushing deeply. "Donna, a chroí… I never believed I could fall in love again. Then you came and you showed me how wrong I was. I've never been happier about being wrong. You are an amazing person, inside and out. I love you no matter what. I love everything about you. I vow to love you for as long as we live." 

"You may seal these vows with a kiss," the priest said. 

They kissed, and the wedding attendees applauded. 

~

Hyde sat next to Jackie at one of the tables in the reception hall. Donna had placed them next to each other at her family and friends table. She and Jack were dancing together. Forman was talking to Jenna. Jon was leading Midge in a playful sort of partner dance.  Bob was leaning over to talk to Jack’s dad. 

Hyde turned to Jackie. “So, how have you been? It’s, uh… It’s been a while since we’ve seen each other.”

“Oh, you know, divorced,” she said with an embarrassed smile. 

“Me too.” 

Her jaw dropped. “Really? Steven Hyde got married?” 

He rolled his eyes, but he smiled. “Yeah, yeah. We thought it was a good idea, then we ended it after a year. Her name was Ellis.” 

Jackie nodded. “Same. I really thought Liam loved me, then on our one year anniversary he ran away to the Bahamas. When he got back, we got divorced.” 

“He sounds like an ass. And he’s stupid for ditching you.” 

Jackie gave him a look. 

He gave her a look back. “Hey, you ditched me, remember? You left without letting me answer.” 

“I didn’t leave, though. And you had a second chance to answer when I came back.” 

“But I blew it, and now we’re here, so let’s forget it.” 

“Fine.” She stared at the dance floor, where couples were paired up. She turned to him and held out her hand. "Wanna dance?" 

He smiled. "Sure." 

He took her hand and they went out to the dance floor. He placed one hand on her hip, and she put her other hand on his shoulder. "I like your suit. You never had anything this nice when we were together." 

"Ellis was a fashion designer," Hyde explained. Despite being unable to tell velvet apart from polyester without her glasses on, she had loved designing. She'd designed many nicer clothes for him since he had so few. "What did Liam do?" 

"He was a writer. He was working on a book about vampires when we were together." 

Hyde laughed a little. "Vampires, huh?" 

She laughed too. "Yep. It was terrible. He'd read chapters to me once he finished them, and God, his writing was awful." 

"Well, good thing you're not Mrs. Vampire Book Guy anymore." 

"Yeah." She pulled him a little closer. "I just realized I missed you."

"Just now?" 

"Well, I wasn't thinking about it before. I guess I kind of forgot how much I like being around you. Just in general." 

Hyde stared at her for a moment. "Yeah, I know what you mean. I missed you too." 

The song changed from Something by the Beatles to You Make Me Real by the Doors. Jackie gasped and squeezed his hand. "It's our song!" 

"It is." Hyde lifted his arm and spun her, then brought her close to him when she came back. He had always liked dancing with her. Way more than he'd liked dancing with Ellis. She smiled through the whole song. 

~

Jackie got her coat and her keys, ready to leave. Steven jogged over to her. "Can I walk you to your car?" 

"Sure," she said. 

They left the reception hall and went out to the beat-down gravel parking lot. Jackie led him over to the car she'd rented for the trip. She was spending a few extra days in Ireland after the wedding, for her own enjoyment. She'd always wanted to see Ireland, and this was her chance. 

"I, uh… I had fun dancing with you today. Thanks for not making things weird between us," he said. 

"I had fun too." She twisted her fingers together. "And why should things be weird? We dated years ago. We're both over it. We can be friends." 

"Exactly." 

They stared at each other for a moment, then they both leaned in and kissed. They parted after a second. Then Jackie wound her arms around his neck and pulled him in for a deeper kiss. His hands found her waist. They kissed as if it was the only thing in the world that mattered. 

He parted the kiss just enough to say, "Donna gave me a ride here, could I go back to the hotel with you?" 

She smiled. "Is that why you asked to walk me to my car?" 

"Maybe." 

She kissed him again. "Well, it's good you need a ride, 'cause I was gonna ask you to come back to the hotel with me anyway." 

His eyebrows rose. "Were you now?" 

"Yeah. If you want to." 

"Oh, I want to." As soon as he finished speaking, his lips were on hers again and Jackie couldn't think of anything else. 

~

Jackie cuddled against Steven in the bed of her motel room. She trailed her fingers over his stomach, tracing small patterns into his skin. "Overall… This was a pretty good wedding," she said. 

"Yeah. I'm happy for Donna and Jack. They work well together. I can see them staying together forever, like the Formans." 

"Me too. Although I don't seem to have a very good judgment of that sort of thing." 

His fingers began combing lightly through her hair. "What do you mean?" 

"Well, I thought we would stay together forever. Then I ran away. And I thought Liam and I would stay together forever, then he ran away. So I don't think I should judge Donna and Jack's potential to stay together." 

"Ah." He watched her fingers tracing hearts over his skin. "Y'know… I think it's a lot easier to tell when you're not a part of the relationship. A part of me always felt like Donna and Forman weren't meant to be. But when we were together… That was the first time I was able to see myself with someone for a long time. And look where we all are now." 

She looked up at him. "You could see yourself with me for a long time?" 

He nodded. "I also saw myself being with Ellis for a long time, so don't go thinking you're special or anything." 

She giggled. "I wouldn't dream of it." 

She kissed him softly. Even if it was only for a night, Jackie was happy to be with Steven again. It was comforting, like coming home after a long trip. Jackie decided not to think about what that really meant too much.

[ameliagiovanna0]

Thoughts on The Rookie 6x02

This might include some repeats of things I've already said/posted, but I wanted to include it here just to get all of my thoughts in one place lol

Daddy Cop 😂😂😂😂😂😂

For a hot second, I thought it was the wrong episode

The choir showed up and then the guitarist. PURE GOLD I LOVE IT SO MUUUCCCHHH

Nolan was so pissed 🤣

Henry called Bailey. Too cute

Nolan literally had a jump scare seeing Randy 😂 He's so unhinged and I love it every time

Luna is always wonderful. She's close to everyone under her husband's command too

Tim shutting his office door with Lucy standing outside was so despondent :(

Yes, the angst is there, but so is the humor, and that, overall, out-weighed the angst. The humor on this show is always top tier. I'm always here for it

The scene between Lucy, Tim, and Angela is one of my favorites, tbh. Angela is such a chaos gremlin and I love her for it. And more Chenford arguing. It's not light hearted like it usually is, but I like to see the different sides to their relationship.

Angela: Let what go? Tim and Lucy: Nothing.

... Tim: Fine. Whatever. Lucy: Great. Angela: Maybe I'll go too. Grab some popcorn on the way for the show Tim: You're not funny Angela: I'm hysterical. Ask Wesley THIS IS WHY I LOVE HER

Gotta admit, Nolan and Bailey both trying to keep each other from finding out things to keep the other calm is pretty cute.

This DJ is so unhinged lol. Bailey shooed Nolan out being like "please don't arrest this guy and make our wedding even more difficult than it already is." First the switchblade, then a robbery, and the molly was the last straw 😂 Bailey's face said it all

Lucy being like, "ok, go ahead" and Tim saying "ladies first" I just-- 😂😂 They're so perfect for each other

Reason #95238 that Lucy Chen is amazing: "I have to look amazing in a dress tomorrow. Nobody care what you look like. He's huge. I'm not fighting him." Tim fighting this giant ass dude simply because his girlfriend asked him to will never not be hilarious and pretty adorable to me. And the fact that the only reason she didn't want to fight him was because she wanted to look good in her dress will never not be badass to me

The Hammer just THREW Tim into those cabinets, across a table, into a TV, over the back of a couch, and against a bed not once but twice. Tim HELD HIS OWN. I know it shouldn't have been, but it was really hot. Poor baby crawled to the coffee table for the ring. THEN, proceeded to hand it to his girlfriend while on one knee and bleeding. LUCY AND I ARE BOTH ABSOLUTELY FINE I PROMISE. He didn't realize it at first, but he definitely did once Lucy stood there stuttering at him. He tried to hand it to her and she just sort of froze. Her brain short circuited and he panicked, and it was all perfect. She still managed to compliment him on the fight though 😂

Lucy: Good job Tim: Yeah, thanks Lucy: You ok? Tim: Yeah, I'm great. *falls over*

It's too funny 😂😂

Angela and Nyla are bestie goals 😁🥰

I love the cuts between the bachelor and bachelorette parties 

Celina bringing up Lucy's future bachelorette party because she knows that she and Tim are a forever kind of thing 😩

Lucy scooted so far into Tim, oh my God. Bestie was practically in his lap

Lucy: I knew it! You just kill them?! Tim: Yes! Because they're bugs.

 I can't, they exasperated way Tim said 'yes!" was just hilarious to me

The little breath that Tim lets out before he says yes to loving Lucy was like, "Do you really even have to ask? Yes, of course I love you. There's no other option."

Tim and Lucy spotting each other across the courtyard and then again across the dance floor. They're always going to find each other whether it's buried alive in the desert or at a friend's wedding, which seems to be their thing now 😩

Aw Luna finishing her degree. I seriously love her and I love her and Grey together. He's so supportive of her, it's just so clear that they're a strong, loving unit

"Sit down, German" had me wheezing. Grey's delivery is everything 😂😂😂

Bailey's entrance was pretty adorable, ngl

A lot of people were saying how Bailey's vows were really beautiful and how it was so great seeing her say those things and mean it after she had been in an abusive marriage, and I couldn't agree more. She was right, what she said was simple, but it covered everything it needed to. And I think it was really beautiful in its simplicity. Nolan's vows were really great too. He's not normally great with words, but it was really sweet, and it's really obvious how much does cherish Bailey. 

Ah and Henry made it!! I miss seeing him. I do wish we got to see Abigail too though. I LOVED her. Plus, their relationship is adorable. 

The dance floor scene with everybody was so cute, omg!! I loved it. Everybody looked so happy and like they were having so much fun. Jenna even said it felt like a real wedding

Aaron and Celina watching Lucy look at Tim across the dance floor was amazing. They're so invested in their relationship, and I think it's hilarious. Chenford had groupies on screen too 🤭😂

I felt so bad for Aaron. He's not handling everything very well, and I do think he was kinda hyper-focusing on Celina a little. It's natural after a shared trauma like that. But he tried to kiss her and she shut him down. It was sad. I was really trying not to like them as a couple, but I kinda do now. IDK

Chenford rampage incoming:

It seems like they arrived separately, but they still sat together at the ceremony and honestly looked like they were enjoying themselves. So to me, that's just an other testament of how solid they are even if though they're fighting

Tim couldn't take it anymore and went pulled Lucy onto the dance floor. He knows they have more talking to do, but he wanted to be close to her. And her pulled her out to If I Ain't Got You of all songs. ARE YOU JOKING????? *squeaks* The way he looked at her when he walked over to her and the way Luna looked at Lucy AHHHHHH. Nope, Imma need a minute

Lucy dragged her hand down Tim's chest and looked him up and down and Tim leaning into her, looking at her lips like LET ME BREATHE

Lucy running her hand through his hair

AND NO ONE CAN TELL ME THIS WAS JUST A COINCIDENCE 

Lucy did not say, "We're gonna get through this. I love you." with this playing in the background just for the hell of it 

Some people want it all

But I don't want nothing at all 

If I ain't got you, baby

Some people want diamond rings

Some just want everything

But everything means nothing

If I ain't got you, yeah

IT WAS DELIBERATE BESTIES 

More thoughts on their fight. Highly recommend checking out the points @sylvies-chen, @morganupstead, and @sisterofficerlucychen made. Of course, my thoughts are also in there

When Lucy said that she loved Tim, in true Chenford fashion, and despite the serious moment, Tim couldn't help but argue (affectionate) with her saying he wasn't sure until he hooked her up to a lie detector. Lucy smacking him. Ugh I just love their banter so much

Aaron came up behind them and Tim was so caught off guard. His facial expressions were very on point for annoyed!Tim. Plus, Aaron was right. Chenford is solid. I'm not worried about them. Is there going to be angst in the future? Yes. Is it going to break them? Not a chance. Their relationship is strong. It's built on friendship and mutual respect. Tim has always respected Lucy, even as a rookie. Yeah, she annoyed him, but she had the guts to stand up to him in ways that no other rookie did, or would have survived doing

EXSQUEEZE ME where you y'all coming from that you came up the stairs together??

end of chenford ramage 

James offering to get everyone's go-bags and Wesley automatically jumping into help. They're helping their women and being good friends. I love it

"Sit you ass down and do some praying" This is why I love Tim 😂

Randy and Chastity being the responsible ones for once keeping Aaron occupied

Super random, but why does Nolan have police lights in his personal truck, but Tim doesn't? You'd think a Metro Liaison Sergeant having them would be more likely than a random training officer 

Celina, my love, this is why you bring backup when you go to meet CIs

Tim in a dress shirt and tie with rolled up sleeves. Dear God   🥵🥵

I was not expecting Nolan to just throw the guy out the window. He's the most laid back out of all of him, and he didn't even hesitate, just pushed him out of at least a second story window. I-- 🤨😂

Poor Bailey flopped on the bed just still in her wedding dress 😂

[blitzsicedcoffee]

I've been thinking a lot recently about my disability, the unknown autoimmune disease, and like what could have caused it.

And of course, it could have been spurred by Covid, or stress, or so many other things. But I am of the mind that it could have been caused by my obvious burnout from the above. From covid, stress, and college.

I took about eight years to finish my bachelor's degree. For many reasons. Financial, Needed a full time job and couldn't do both, couldn't figure out a solid major, etc. And once I restarted college at the university during Covid, since I had lost my job at Starbucks at the time, I wanted to go quick. I wanted it to be over with. I wanted to finally FINISH.

So I did full time school for a year, committed to a major and minor. And then my unemployment payments dried up after a year. So I had to do full time school AND a part time job. The job I chose wasn't that bad. I worked part time at a sex toy shop. Sure the company itself left little to be desired (playboy industries). But it was a cool job cause I got to "test out" the toys, (usually meaning like, on my hand, duh), and explain to customers how they could be used. And I felt like I was also actually using my degree during this. (Sexuality and Gender studies).

Then, my senior year I ALSO took on an internship at the Queer Resource Center on my University Campus. And that was an extra 16 hours a week. So effectively, I was juggling THREE JOBS. That, my part time job, and my senior coursework to culminate into a final research project.

You could say I was already within the throws of burnout, cause I was. But I was "keeping up with it". I was getting adequate sleep, I was still on socials, participating in hobbies, doing chores. I *thought* I was *fine*.

The biggest mistake I made, was when I graduated. I started applying to jobs AS SOON as I graduated. I felt this pressure to get more money, to live up to my degree, to contribute more to my household. Even though I was already paying my portion of rent and bills just fine with the part time job. And no one was asking me to do this. Not my parents, not my partner. Just myself.

After a few months, I did land a job. A state job. Applying my degree. It was exactly what I wanted. I quit my part time job. I Committed fully to the full time job (which was three months of mind numbing computer trainings first), and I was good at it.

Then six months in, I crashed.

I started having nightmares, waking up in cold sweats. I started having horrible joint pain. I couldn't think straight during the day and had horrible brain fog. And it only escalated from there. And being neurodivergent too, I was struggling to understand aspects of the in person office, and neurotypical people's attitudes and reactions. That didn't help.

Which brings us here. I'm on leave from the full time job on paid leave until the paid leave ends. And I don't know if I can even go back. From my constantly worsening disease, etc.

I don't really have advice to give, this was mostly a rant for myself. But I guess...if I had to give advice it would be SLOW DOWN.

Please for the love of the gods slow down. The grind mindset is fucking poison. You will hurt yourself. And if you think you won't, you're lying to yourself.

Another thing to add: Yes I acknowledge theres a lot of privilege steeped in this experience. This is just my experience and what I take from it in context of soul crushing capitalism.

[apocryphalia]

sorry to reappear here just to be genuine on main but I'm deep in the finals soup right now so naturally I've been having Thoughts

I've been thinking about when I was 25 and finishing my associate's degree and applying to transfer to get my bachelor's. and I knew I wanted to do grad school and I was so anxious about finishing everything as quickly as possible because I was already going to be in my 30s (the horror!) by the time I finished school and would be able to actually "start my career"

but you know what I did instead? fell in love with a new subject. started thinking about other degree programs. took way too many classes my senior year and burned myself out and decided to take a year off after undergrad to decide what I wanted to do. and then COVID happened and I decided to keep waiting and I came out as trans, and I realized actually the thing I wanted to do was still what I wanted when I was 25.

so I applied to law school. and I thought, ok, this is fine. I'll get through the next three years and then I can REALLY start living my life when I'm 34.

but friends. do you know what happened instead? I fell in love with the thing everyone made me expect to hate, that I thought was going to be just a necessary evil I had to suffer through to get out into the world and practice. to finally get started.

I've been looking at phd programs now. I've been systematically harassing all my professors about how to do what they do and I've been reading their scholarship and I've been rotating the erie doctrine in my mind like it's my new fucking blorbo

and when I first realized that oh fuck, maybe I do actually still have some interest in academia? and legal academia, of all things? I thought, well shit, now I'm not going to REALLY get started until I'm in my 40s. and I was MAD. I was mad at myself for every point in the last 31 years where a different choice might have theoretically gotten me here sooner. I was mad at the legal profession and the academy for working the way that it does and I was mad at God and the universe for making me want things and then making them hard.

but look. what have I been doing all this time if not living my life? what am I doing right now if not starting my career?

my point is. my point is I actually love getting older and learning new things about myself, even if sometimes I'm the last one to know them. and I loved the experiences I had in undergrad and I love the experiences I'm having now, and I'm accumulating a whole list of other experiences to have and things to learn that I think I'll love too. and this shit isn't some race for the finish line or a checklist of things to do in the exact right order or at the exact right age. it's just... life. and sometimes it's weird and sometimes it's hard and sometimes things don't go the way you wanted or the way you thought they were going to, and I think that's probably fine actually?

idk. I just wanted to share.

[winwintea]

I got what I expected from the homework helping scenario. Let's be real none of them would help. They would just go ''Babe, you don't need school, you don't need a degree, you're gonna be fine without it, look at me😌 I'm doing great" BRO WTF IF I WERE TALENTED AND PRETTY LIKE Y'ALL I WOULD HAVE LEFT SCHOOL TOO.

No offence but most of them didn't even finish high school. Only renjun and chenle graduated from Beijing contemporary music academy so ig that counts. But yeah all of them dropped out . I mean I'm not directing this to them but most of the idols (imsorryimsorryimsorry) didn't even pass highschool. Like it's necessary to graduate yk. I hope they atleast pass that stage. AGAIN I'm not hating on anyone but just stating this. Sorry again for ranting live I've been thinking about this for sometime now.

-🍄

NOOO BC THEY LITERALLY WOULD… like realistically some of them would try their best… but they really couldn’t understand… AND SO TFYE IF I HAD YOUR FACE CARD I COULD BUY EVERYTHING AND NOT GO TO SCHOOL TOO BUT UNFORTUNATELY I CANT SING OR DANCE 🤗🤗 and i’m not even like… sm standards of pretty… like 🥹🥹

ITS FUN TO IMAGINE LIKE 🤓☝️ dreamies though… like renjun and chenle could definitely… QHJDJSJAJKDKS

i think most idols have stated how hard it is to do both school and be an idol as a full time job… and it was especially hard for the dreamies since they were so young 😭

jaemin has expressed interest in going back to school i think? i forgot where but i watched something where he said he wanted to, and it’s not like they have a choice either 😔 i hope they do eventually get some sort of education in the future

did mark graduate??? WHEN DID HE BECOME A TRAINEE I DON’T KNOW MY MARK LEE LORE

most of this can be blamed on our number one public enemy SM ENTERTAINMENT! bc if you debut the dreamies that young there’s no opportunity for them to learn… and then there’s kun who wasn’t part of nct until like 2018 so even though he did join sm rookies the same year he started his bachelors… he had so much free time to finish anyways cause SM WASNT DEBUTING HIM 🤗 (although he might’ve asked not to debut early cause he wanted to finish idk… regardless i think about this a lot too)

AND NO WORRIES FOR RANTING I LOVE HEARING YOUR RANTS AND RANTING MYSELF AS WELL <33 and your claims are all absolutely valid do not apologize lmaoo

[r-anela]

Gothic Girl _ E.M.

Summery:

Eddie Munson Lives, Vol2. Never happened, everything is fine. He graduated from school and works as a car mechanic & performs with Corrodet Coffin on weekends. His best friend moved back to Hawkins permanently last year after graduating with her bachelor's degree. She now lives alone in her parents' house, after 1986 her parents didn't plan to return. With the boys coming home from college for the summer, a DnD session needs to happen. But Eddie's apartment is too small, so they all go to his best friend's house, however the boys did not expect such a home.  

warnings: None ( if there should be, please tell me)

Reader is female presenting and is described as having black hair

Gif is not mine

It's the summer of 1990, the no longer small boys have summer break and return home. Since Eddie doesn't have much room in his small apartment, the summer dnd session is supposed to take place at your place, Eddie Munson's best friend. You and Eddie have known each other since kindergarten and have been through a lot.  

You are lying in your bed in just a big shirt and some booty shorts when the doorbell rings, Eddie was already half an hour late, but that was nothing new for you. You skip in the direction of the front door, quickly tossing a few pieces of clothing into a corner and open the door with a broad smile on your lips. "Hello sweetheart, how are you? I see you have also adapted to the weather?" "Shut up Munson, don't tell me you're not hot? It's fucking hot that August, it's nearly 94° for fuck's sake..." "alright alright" Eddie said as he strolled into your kitchen with a bag of snacks. " Tell me y/n, isn't the whole house too big for you all by yourself?" " I'm not alone!" " Your three cats don't count y/n, how about some human company?" "Are you going to move in Munson?" at this question Eddie's face flushed red but he quickly dismissed it.

"Nah, the boys will be back next week and since you have so much room I thought I'd ask you..." "If you could host your DnD session here?" you finished his sentence. "Yes exactly, of course only if you want to, the boys are also quite nice" "Of course, I know the dudes we went to school together, don't remember? and I haven't seen them for ages" "One thing will be clear, THIS HERE" he pointed at you and then at the furniture "they will definitely not expect THIS". As he took one of your candles and waives it around in the air.

"But you set up everything in the basement and the guys are expected to bring snacks, besides they are welcome to sleep here if it gets too late, I have plenty of room. But now let's get started on the movie, you didn't forget to pick it up did you?" Eddie just waved the DVD cassette triumphantly and wandered off towards the living room.  

A week later the whole gang was at your door Mike, Will, Dustin, Lucas, Erica, Gareth and Jeff. They were arguing about who should ring the doorbell, because no one except Gareth and Jeff knew you very well, but they had heard a lot from Eddie and seen you around at school.

Eddie likes to talk about you a lot. Finally Erika rang the bell, because the boys were still arguing and she was getting impatient. The bell rang throughout the house and all at once the boys fell silent and stood on the porch like tin soldiers, their grocery bags and backpacks pressed against them like a protective shield.   

Opening the door at them was a black-haired young woman wearing a The Cure band shirt, mesh tights as arm warmers, and black jeans shorts that were clearly cut-off old pants. On her feet she had pink fluffy socks and around her neck she wore a leather collar. "Hey, my name is Y/N, I've heard a lot about you guys, come on in". She waved the squad into the house and picked up a white and black spotted cat in one smooth movement. It immediately snuggled up to her face and began to purr. "Make yourselves at home, put your things down and make yourselves cozy. Eddie is in the basement right now setting everything up. Would you like something to drink?" a monotonous "Yeah, gladly, whatever you have" was heard. And so you went into the kitchen to set up the drinks.   

"'Whoa guys look at this, everything is black and blood red in here'" Mike said out loud. Dustin, meanwhile, stood open-mouthed in disbelief at the bookshelves that filled the living room walls. "Looks like Y/N is an even bigger nerd than all of you, nerds!" Said Erika, beaming.   

"Hey, nice to see you guys, good to have you back!" yelled Eddie as he hopped up the basement stairs. " Yo Eddie, that girl is way out of your league" said Gareth, "out of yours either way, cutie" said Eddie who blushed slightly at Gareth's statement. Gareth was the only one who knew that Eddie had had a crush on you for a long time and worshipped you.   

"Tell me, is there anything Y\N can't do?" said Lucas, who was examining your knitting and crocheting basket.   

"Nah man, she's nature's talent and super nerd," Eddie said with a grin. "And a hot goth chick," said Jeff, who got a neck slap from Eddie for the comment. 

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[missjanjie]

Need some advice from someone not invested in the situation,so don't mind the vent:

My mother is hell-bent on my returning to complete a degree programme that I was in when I was a teenager (17 or so). Here's the thing though. I was so unhappy doing this programme that I couldn't even go to class without getting anxious or wanting to throw up. Grades-wise, I was fine, I suppose(the pass mark for this particular degree was a B, so 60%). But I grew to hate the programme itself because my anxiety was through the roof.

So, my Registrar saw the state I was in and suggested that I take a break and do an unassociated(heh) Associate Degree till I got myself together mentally. As of currently, I'm the top student in that particular Associate Degree and having a great time(and my anxiety's practically non-existent).

Here's the issues though. My mother hates that I've "downgraded" myself by doing an Associate Degree and continues to insist that I was "tricked" into doing it by the Registrar(who was genuinely trying to help). So,to fix my supposed "mistake", I should immediately return to the original Bachelor's Degree I was doing and complete it (despite the visceral trauma it caused me) because "everyone else in your age group has Master's Degrees and PHDs and you have nothing to show" (I'm 22).

But the thing is, why not get a Bachelor's Degree in a different subject area? I'm not opposed to higher education at all,but she's so fixated on the original Bachelor's Degree (in STEM) that I was doing that she can't let it go. She brings it up every chance she gets. I could be drinking a glass of water and she'll find a way to bring it up. Going so far as to say that it's what God wants me to do(I'm sure God wouldn't want me actively having panic attacks while doing what He supposedly wants me to do, but I digress).

So,yeah. What do I do? Where do I even go from here? If I make suggestions about an alternate path,she'll either ignore me, talk over me or segway into talking about my original Bachelor's Degree programme and how I should be graduating right now.

(Sorry for the long rant. Kinda don't have anyone to get my feelings out to IRL.)

unless you live in a weird mensa cult I don’t think people your age have masters/phd’s. people my age don’t have phd’s and only those in specific fields (usually teaching or social work) have masters and im 28.

also i have a little anecdote that while may not provide answers, can offer some perspective. when i was in college i took a feminist studies course and in that class was a 72 year old woman. i initially assumed she was just auditing the class (ie taking it for fun) but she explained to me that she was finishing her degree. i asked her what made her decide then and she told me “sure, i couldve gone back ten years ago or even twenty years ago. but that wasn’t where my journey was taking me.” point being, your journey is yours alone

there isn’t really anything you can do about your mom if you still live with her or are otherwise financially dependent on her except stay the course until you’re able to get out on your own or something like that. im assuming you’re not american based on some spelling, so i don’t really know the university system there so i could be off base