#Idk how to deal with executive dysfunction

[arafergirl-artdump]

Executive dysfunction go brrrrrrrrrr (I tried to recreate Ko Takeuchi style again instead of making my Big Animation Project™)

実行機能ってあおあおあおあおあ（大きなアニメーションプロジェク���™を作る代わりに竹内高のスタイ��を再現してみた）

i feel bad that my concentration is non-existent if i'm not stimming all time, but at least it's something.

常にスティミングしていないと集中力がなくなるについて悪い心地があるが、少なくともそので何かを作りできる。

Btw, here's my other attempts:

ところに、それがボクの他の試み:

(i'm sorry about attempt to drew my humanisation of DJs into Ko Takeuchi style)

（DJ達のヒューマニゼーションは竹内高のスタイルに再現しみるごめん）

[windupaidoneus]

bpd isnt easy guys. but adhd is worse. FOR ME PERSONALLY

[themosthatedbeingg]

.

[manasurge]

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[nightmarebunarts]

The minute I get home from work I'm too tired to do anything fun so I just sit there and feel miserable until I have to get ready for bed and repeat the cycle the next day so I'm not sure how I'm gonna do this for the rest of my life but at least we're finally productive amirite

[twisted-wonderland-but-gayer]

thinking thoughts about adhd yuu who's been struggling w/ grades even in their home world and having even more grade-related breakdowns made worse through grim ... grimming.

just imagining riddle and vil (mostly vil) going insane on a yuu who is honest to god trying their best and has been trying their best long before they got there. now, on top of forgetting assignments, not being able to snap out of a task when they know they should be doing their work, esp since you know damn well grim isn't gonna do anything but beg for food. getting overstimulated in the middle of alchemy due to a bunch of noises/sights/smells/textures/etc that they've never seen before and still have to get used to while classmates just look back at a yuu fighting and gritting their teeth not to scream at everyone. make that worse with the stress of dealing w/ everyone's overblots on top of having to feed grim on top of having to feed themselves and to do that they need to work to get money because crowley won't give them shit and managing all that on top of schoolwork that they have to learn a new language for?? mental breakdown. let yuu snap. i will forever love your "yuu fucking snaps" fics because yuu deserves to be mean. as a treat.

oh also: vil getting on yuu's case if they have a skin-picking stim. also azul (pre-ob) trying to "cure" them like in your physically disabled yuu bit. also yuu being given meds in their home world but literally not having access to them in twst just to stress them out more.

Tbh this is probably how even a non adhd would be, even the whole forgetting, executive dysfunction, texture stuff. Things in twst may not sound or feel the same. Being too exhausted to do stuff they need to do. Being so busy working that they forget hw on top of them not understanding it fully cause it has a lot a cultural context or just designed for ppl in twst.

Straight A Yuu now an academic failure no matter what and being made fun of or having people expecting them to "do better" but you know damn well if you were to ask them abt Albert Einstein or Julius Ceaser they couldn't answer.

Yuu slowly growing more and more unhinged until they become numb or end up snapping violently. Wanna act tough? Get bent. They break someone's nose and it's the talk of the school because looking at a lot of the fights around school no blood is drawn. They don't wanna act so tough now huh? What happened to survival of the fittest? They act like they're about it and all until the meet someone that's actually about that life.

I mean hell, I even think some serious yelling would shock a good chunk of them given how everyone is. Or just standing up to them. Idk Yuu being made fun of for somethings they can't help or something they like and just "Yeah you have a problem? Yes I fucking like it sorry you don't get it." Or idk they stand up for someone else in a violent "Shut the fuck up what's up with you? They have a fucking condition they can't help it— I don't give a fuck you don't know, if you had basic empathy or decency you wouldn't comment on shit like that until you got the fulll story, and even if they were backing away from fear I don't blame them, you're a bitch"

[smoov-criminal]

vent post incoming

AUGH im so tired guys. so unbelievably tired. ive been doing a bunch of doordash while looking for a job bc im still waiting on ssdi (i actually got a call and they're going to finally get me a case manager after a year and a half so yay) and hooooly shit. im exhausted. i don't have the energy to do any of the things i enjoy, and lots of the things i need to be doing ive been putting off.

i have a drs appointment on wednesday but it's with my old dr in the town i moved from (where my ex still lives. lol.) bc ive been out of my antipsychotic for like a month (prior authorizations my behated) but can't see a psychiatrist where i live currently yet, so i have to go to my old one. anyways im also going to beg for an adderall prescription or something because i cannot keep living like this, not when i can't see a psych for at least a month. chronic fatigue + executive dysfunction = nothing getting done.

im also just generally not looking forward to going back to the town i lived in with my ex, being off my meds has made me feel pretty terrible mentally and idk how well im gonna handle being there again especially since the office is really close to their house (my new gf offered to go with me though so i will have some support).

at least i know my meds are effective bc i rarely deal with depressive symptoms when im on it but rn im just so sad, and my inability to do things i enjoy bc fatigue is not helping. all i can do is doordash then lay in bed which really isn't good for depression methinks.

anywayssss this ended up being quite long so if u made it this far thanks for reading. i could honestly use some words of encouragement or something but i appreciate being heard in general.

[monstersinthecosmos]

Okay I don’t want this to be like an obnoxious millennial assumption because I’m positive that every generation has things like this, but the way autism and ADHD was treated for us in the 90’s and how it affects adult diagnoses is like, imo, so integral to our coming of age and the stories we tell and the way we’ve gotten to know ourselves, even the way it relates to our job market and economy and how we operate inside it, and especially the way a pandemic uncovered it for so many people and exposed the cracks and revealed that we were all just barely functioning and held together with popsicle sticks and anyway

I say that because maybe it’s the un-diagnosed 90’s child in me but I feel particularly emotional about Keith’s arc in learning that he’s part Galra, and the way even the creators said they made him sort of prickly because of his biology, and I just !! Think so much about Keith’s neurotype as a part Galra!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cause something about being diagnosed later in life is like, looking back at all the other ways you tried to handle yourself, all the missteps, maybe even misdiagnoses. Like, how many times did you try to treat ANXIETY without realizing you didn’t have an anxiety disorder, you just can’t deal with your family blaring the TV from the next room? How many times were you told you were lazy, or lying, when you didn’t know what executive dysfunction is? 

Keith is such a lovely rich character because his prickliness is EARNED—we know what happened to him, we know he’s traumatized, we know he’s been treated poorly by many people in his life. We know that he grew up thinking that he’d been abandoned by one of the people who should’ve loved him the most, in the whole world. He even questions that in his vlog—he makes the connection that he has trouble with people because of his mom. 

But I just wonder like, how much of it is just his biology. Not understanding the body he’s in, being completely ignorant of one whole half of his culture. Had he ever mutated before the TBP fight? Did it take him by surprise, did it frighten him? ((* This is head canon territory LMAO there’s no way to really know—like, is he able to do this because he just spent so much time with Krolia, or does Shiro going That’s the Keith I remember mean they used to have really primal sex that turned his eyes yellow? Lol)) 

Like when we talk about even the most broad generic terms of saying someone is neurodivergent, we don't even need to put a real life label on Keith. Like he's literally not human! Of course his brain looks different! Of course he functions differently! And I wonder how much is nature v nurture -- if he knew the truth about his mom, if his dad had lived, if he'd been allowed a normal childhood, would he still have been a weird kid?

Cause like, even seeing the way Shiro is able to get through to him, we see ways that he allowed for thrill seeking, and he didn't judge Keith for stealing his car. It reminds me of like, what we know now about asking children to sit still in school, and how perhaps some children would do better with standing desks. Shiro wants him to behave and succeed, and doesn't judge him for being a car thief, and gets through to him by bringing him cliff diving. And it just feels like this clue, you know, that nothing is wrong with Keith, he's just living in a weird place where people don't get him.

It’s just really special to me, because there’s so many pieces in the sequence of events of Keith’s character arc, and I know I’ve said this a handful of times now, but I really sincerely believe it’s the only thing the show really nailed. Accepting himself during the BOM Trial -> MOMENTS later learning something very important about his biology -> spending time with Krolia -> coming back to pilot Black when he’s READY and WANTS to (unlike the first time, when he resisted) -> becoming a pragmatic strong leader by the end.

Gosh idk. 

I don’t really have anywhere to go with this, it’s just something I was thinking about today and it gets me real emotional. Like, Keith must have had these moments, re-evaluating who he’d been before he’d known, finally understanding why he was Like That, and it’s so healing to imagine him accepting his past self and forgiving it because he understands now. 

[satanfemme]

Nahyoure right mushrooms are fun and great for ur mental health if ur a chronically depressed person

it's actually kinda insane (I mean neurodivergent) how good mushrooms can be for your mental health. cause I've seen all the anecdotal evidence and studies and stuff before, but idk if I really believed it until I experienced it for myself. I fully went into the experience with my only goal to be experimenting with it, seeing what it's like, and trying to have a good time; I wasn't trying to force any serious psychiatric benefits or anything.

but for the past week my executive dysfunction has literally been SO much better. it's not perfect, but it's unarguably better in a way I've never experienced before. like I keep doing the dishes. do you know what a big deal that is for me? I Can Not do dishes, this is a basic fact about my lifestyle. it's why I rely 100% on disposable bowls and utensils. when I do have dirty dishes, they will sit in the sink for 2 weeks minimum, many many months maximum, before I'm able to clean them. it's not just frustrating but a genuine health hazard to be this way. I frequently need to throw things out because sitting in the sink that long ruins them. but somehow I have done the dishes every single day since my trip last saturday.

first it took me 2-3 days to catch up on what was already in my sink, but now I'm just using dishes On Purpose, and then cleaning them right after. not just within the same day (already an impossible feat) but Right After I'm Done with them. this was unthinkable for me two weeks ago. I have no idea how permanent this effect is going to be but just this one week of increased functionality alone will have been enough for me to be forever thankful. fucking adderall didn't help me this much. anyway, yeah the general boost in mood has been great too. can't wait to trip again sometime.

[actuallyadhd]

hiie!

i'm 18 and i've been trying to self-diagnose. i'm curious about adhd and abuse. i relate to the adhd experience of executive dysfunction, depression, rsd, time blindness, sensory issues, emotional dysregulation etc. but growing up in a super strict and abusive household i've never even had hobbies let alone hyperfixations. so is it possible? to mask so severely that you have no hyperfixations??

i've heard from diagnosed folk that have had an abusive childhood but they all say that it made them hyperfixate more as an escape mechanism. but then i went in the opposite direction, so maybe i don't have adhd? i might have had some hyperfixations ig but it never lasts as long as peope with diagnosed adhd say it does. so ig they are not hyperfixaions but just things i like a lot.

i also don't "stim", i feel like i've forever been understimulated as my mother would remove anything stimulating books/games/TV/music etc. any "stimming" actions were condemned and ridiculed (leg shaking, finger-tapping or even simple vocal stims), this has been enforced in my brain as socially rude and uncultured so uhh ig it could be that i've been masking. that could explain why i did so well in school because there was either math or no stimulation at all. but maybe i'm just having a bad time from all the other things and not adhd?

idk i am like 70% sure i have adhd but i have no access to a clinical diagnosis, so i'm doing extensive research and i want to be thorough before i can make any claims.

Sent April 12, 2024

It can be really hard to know whether some things are due to trauma or ADHD or something else. I have a friend who grew up in an abusive home and got assessed for autism but the clinician couldn’t give a diagnosis because the amount of trauma was making it hard to tease out what was causing which things.

I do think that a lot of ADHDers have trauma because of how we get treated due to our differences. That doesn’t mean ADHD is actually a trauma response; it means that sometimes, trauma happens because we are different due to ADHD. I can recommend Crappy Childhood Fairy on YouTube if you are interested in learning more about trauma and some ways you might be able to deal with it.

Hyperfixations/special interests and stimming are really common ADHD things, but they are not part of the diagnostic criteria. Have a look at our self-diagnosis post to find out more about how to figure this out.

Regardless of whether you have ADHD, you are welcome here. You may find some of the printables at the web site useful, so do consider checking them out.

Followers, what do you think about ADHD and trauma?

-J

[posts-i-saw-on-wikipedia]

Maybe this is pathetic, but I thought, without checking, that I needed an ID to sign up for classes at my community college. However, when I found out that the earliest date I could get an appointment with the DMV would be February 4th, instead of just shrugging and deciding to wait for next semester, I actually looked on the website to see if there was any other proof of residency I could supply, and discovered that my voter ID card works just fine. Maybe that doesn't sound like a big deal, but I suffer from extreme executive dysfunction due to ADHD, and I also think I routinely self sabotage. So, the fact that I took the time to see if there's a way for me to provide proof of residency other than an ID card is very encouraging. It's slight, but for the first time in, well, ever, I have hope that I might actually be able to tackle college. Especially since once I get my ID, I can access my ADHD meds, which will hopefully help me with maintaining enough focus to do my homework, which was always my biggest problem.

Idk if that helps, but it's a big deal to me.

Hun, that's the exact opposite of pathetic. That's actually pretty amazing. I know how both executive dysfunction and self sabotage feel, so that you were able to get things done is really great. You did a really good job there, and i'm proud of you. In fact, we're all proud of you and cheering you on when you tackle college (can i have a "hell yea" in the notes, everyone? ). Just remember - one step at a time, progress isn't linear, you got this.

Thanks for your ask <3

[tarantula-hawk-wasp]

sorry in advance for unsolicited advice but this was just so helpful for me...

I let everyone I talk to know that I have two scheduled "reply to texts" times per week, one on Wednesday from 12pm-1 and one on Sunday from 12pm-1.

unless we're dating, you're my mother, or we have prearranged another communication time, any texts sent outside that will not be replied to until the next text answering time, unless truly urgent and marked "‼️" or "time sensitive:"

this may sound wild, but typically people are like "haha you're so quirky" and then comply and don't get offended when I don't answer them. hell, plenty are like "oh my god I need to do that".

stress greatly reduced! I just make tea twice per week, pretend I'm my own secretary, and deal with texts

not saying this crazy system would work for you, but like, weird non-traditional solutions are possible and manageable. so.. have hope? idk!

you and me, friend, we were meant for a world of monthly letter correspondences, and not texts randomly during the workday. that like isnt half bad advice in general AND you made me remember I was supposed to be implementing a schedule for when I make myself reply to work emails (but like a time of day rather than a day of the week) bc I also have anxiety and executive dysfunction over those. tbh with texting for me mostly I have my handful of people texting is no issue with ( close friends and family), but my problem is the acquaintances or casual friends or more distant relatives texting me out of the blue once a year where I know if I put off replying I will only get more anxious about doing so and put more pressure on myself to get a good grade in conversation. I really like your scheduled plan AND the "pretending to be your own secretary" is exactly how I get myself to handle phone calls tbh

[omegasmileyface]

years of cbt didnt help with avoidance + executive dysfunction and im starting to wonder if part of that was my therapists not knowing how to deal with alexithymia ? bc i dont remember most of the therapy but i do remember a lot of conversations like "next time you cant do something, try to identify what youre feeling and why you can't do it" and me coming back like "yeah idk i wasnt feel anything other than 'i dont wanna' and i just kinda... couldnt" . i still havent quite learned how to know what im feeling. im a little better though! anyway i just wrote down an extensive list of reasons i avoid doing things and i am very proud of myself

[ambienthousewife]

friends...mutuals...what do you all do to help with creative block/executive dysfunction? i feel like after work and doing all the other routines and chores and shit that i need to do afterwards i have Zero energy and i struggle with doing fun things that are nice for myself. i always end up hyperfixating on the amalgamation of chores and shit i have to do which never seems like it goes away but if i dont chip at it a little bit i like get realy uncomfortable and develop terrible anxiety. i think i struggle with it so much is because i feel like for a lot of people its just like "well thats how that is i guess you shouldve done your fun stuff when you were younger because now youre an ADULT" which is obviously brainwashed bogus. but man it does get to me because having to work full time at a stupid job that makes me wanna hurl myself into the sun and breaks my body down is not condusive for helping myself actually get the energy to do creative shit. but i had like the same deal even back when i was unemployed or in school or shit like that so. idk for those who are good at doing shit like that wdyd

[judesbelligoal]

peeps with ADHD, what’s your strategy to tackling things when you are dealing with executive dysfunction? I need to start making my resume and applying to jobs and then I also need to make an appointment with a physician and this and that and this and that, but I just… can’t. I don’t know how to explain it, but y’all get me. And it’s like, I WANT to do the things, like I genuinely want to do them (like I want a job because I need fucking money bro), but I just can’t idk. It’s like my brain is avoiding doing anything.

When i feel like my brain is blocking me from doing things, its usually paired with anxiety or fear of failure. So i try to get at the root of the problem and tackle one thing at a time and i try to do that very ahead of schedule so i have enough time to do one task at a time instead of doing everything at once

[desultory-suggestions]

just asking for advice, you're not forced to answer ofc

i struggle a lot with motivation, when i force myself to do things, it just doesn't feel right, and i feel so guilty about it, things like going to school or even brushing my teeth, it's all pointless and physically exhausting

idk if i'm just lazy or smt

anyway, any tips for folks with low motivation?

Hello, love! Thank you for your patience. Motivation is such a common struggle. I use some unconventional study and motivation tactics personally, as someone with ADHD and Dyslexia I have to get through a lot of nonsense to do basic things. First, you are not lazy! The idea today of laziness is very frustrating to me, and I feel is built on capitalist (and white supremacist) ideals. See the NAP Ministry.

According to The (USA) National Library of Medicine, "Executive dysfunction is commonly seen in major depression. The types of executive deficits seen in depression include problems with planning, initiating, and completing goal-directed activities." Anyone struggling with depression, whether an episode or long-term can struggle with these basic tasks. So how can we deal with this?

Some different techniques that may help:

Talk through the tasks you need to do out loud. You can discuss them in linear order or not. Don't focus on making them perfect and detailed, just explain it like you would to a friend.

Explain what you are doing as if someone is watching you/you're teaching someone. This is how I motivate myself when studying/working out/etc. and shows you that you do know what you are doing.

Break tasks down into smaller pieces to help them be more manageable, or simplify the ones that seem too complicated. (For this I need to do x, then y, then z. I don't need to overthink brushing my teeth, it's okay to just go do it.

Ask someone to be your accountability buddy. Body doubling/parallel play can be very useful. I ask my partner to brush his teeth with me so I have someone else there.

Accept that you don't need to do 100% of everything. You can't brush, floss, and use mouthwash? Okay brush for even just thirty seconds, it's better than nothing!

Utilize tools, but don't try to make it fancy. Aesthetics can be helpful and motivating, they can also apply pressure to make everything look good. Google Calendar or a messy notebook is good enough.

Surrounds tasks with cushioning time to relax. Even for little tasks, you can promise yourself rest before and after. Likewise, do enjoyable things during arduous tasks. Watch a silly video, playa. song!

Consider what the biggest obstacle is. Does it feel pointless? Do you want to do it? If not, why not? How can you change what is making you avoidant? If you do want to, what feels like it's stopping you? A specific fear? Or an impenetrable wall? These questions help define the next steps.

Accept you cannot do everything, especially not when you are suffering. You deserve help and it's okay to ask for it. Professional help is important when conquering issues with motivation whether from depression, ADHD, etc. Medications, therapy, and more can improve your mood.

Some tools I use:

Brushout - An app to help you brush your teeth for the right amount of time. Simple, and makes a nice dinging sound. Can be added as a widget to your home screen on iPhones.

Google Calendar - Also simple. Easy to click and add events and get reminders for things creeping up on you.

Mnemosyne Notebook - Ok the brand doesn't matter but the paper in this is so smooth and it makes me want to use it. But yes a notebook to organize thoughts.

Little Treats - I like to keep little snacks and treats around for working on things I have been struggling with. You don't have to wait until after, let yourself fuse joy with your efforts.

You do not need to be ashamed for struggling. No matter the reason or the manner, we all go through difficult things. Reach out, and don't give up. Feel free to ask for more information or advice again.

Best,

Evan