#IT'S TOO FUCKING LONG IT NEEDS TO BE A MOVIE
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ayukas · 2 days ago
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18+ mdni
dry humping w/ nct dream 𖦹ࡇ𖦹
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mark
dry humping with mark often starts when he's too tired to fully engage but still wants to satisfy you. he's stretched thin from schedules and late-night recordings, so his usual energy is depleted. you can't help but take advantage of his exhaustion though, wanting to please him in return for all the nights he's worshipped you. you carefully climb onto his lap, grinding against him while he lazily leans back, hands weakly gripping your hips. "fuck baby, i can't... too tired..." he mumbles, only to let out a gutteral groan when you press against him just right. the way his breathing turns ragged is so addictive, and soon he's thanking you in between pants, his fatigue melting into the pleasure you're giving him.
"fuuuck, needed this so bad. you're so good to me."
renjun
with renjun, it's the unspoken tension during quiet, intimate moments that get to you both. movie nights are his favourite way to unwind, but when his hand starts to idly roam up your thigh, you know it's only a matter of time. it's subtle at first—his lips casually brushing against your ear under the guise of a comment about the movie, or the way his soft fingers play around the hem of your shirt. before you know it, he's pulling you onto his lap, his voice low and filled with a mix of affection and need. "fuck—we're not even halfway through with the movie," he murmurs, breath warm against your ear as his hips push up to meet yours,
"but i just can't wait any longer."
jeno
for jeno, dry humping is an impatient, messy ordeal. it's unrestrained and raw, with sweat beading on both your foreheads as he grips your waist with bruising strength. the friction builds too fast, too strong, and within minutes, he's already trembling beneath you, gasping for air. "baby, please... can't take it anymore," he whines, voice breaking as he pleads to feel you fully. his desperation is palpable, and even though he tries his best to hold back, it never lasts long. the second he feels you grinding just right, your swollen clit grazing over his tip, he's begging with wide, lust-filled eyes,
"can i put it in, please? fuck, just the tip—i swear it'll feel so good..."
hyuck
dry humping with haechan always starts off as a battle of wills. he's glued to his computer, headset on, shouting profanities at his screen, but it's just so hot that you can't help but want to distract him. you straddle him quickly, blocking his view, and his whiny protests quickly morph into high-pitched moans when you starting grinding your heat against him. "baby, i was in the middle of a game!" he complains, though his hands immediately grab your hips to guide your movements, his hips jerking up to gain more friction. he's loud, burying his face in your neck as he lets out the most sinful noises. "fuuuck, you feel so fucking good," he groans, fingers digging into the plush of your thighs.
"you win, baby—ahh—just don't stop… fuck—please."
jaemin
jaemin is the king of control. he knows exactly how to drive you crazy. he's so smug and cocky, leaning back as he watches you struggle to keep your composure while grinding against him. it should piss you off, how he seems to be so unaffected while you're desperately trying to chase your high. "is this all you've got?" he teases, his tone dripping with mockery. he refuses to give in until you're utterly desperate, using the friction between your thin silk panties and his rough jeans to bring yourself to the brink while staying frustratingly composed himself. "c'mon baby, you can do better than this..." he taunts, his grip on your hips tightening just enough to make you shiver. and when you finally push him over the edge, his smirk only grows wider as he coos,
"good job baby, now lets see how much more desperate you can get for nana, hm?"
chenle
for chenle, the thrill is half the fun. he's all about the risk, pulling you into the backseat of his car even when your friends have only stepped away to grab some snacks at the petrol station. the mere idea of someone catching the two of you only spurs him on, getting him harder than ever. after all, he's just a whore for exhibitionism. "shh, you don't want our friends to see you like this, do you?" he whispers with a mischievous grin, though his own breathing is uneven as he grinds against you. his hands roam everywhere, tugging at your clothes just enough to make you squirm. the tension is electrifying, and he can’t hide the satisfied smirk when he feels you trembling above him.
"see? told you it'd be worth it."
jisung
jisung is so needy, it's overwhelming. just being near you has him worked up, but he's too shy to articulate exactly what he wants from you. instead, he opts to cling onto you, his big, veiny hands wandering all over your body shamelessly as he presses his hips against yours with little control. "need you s'bad, please..." he stammers out, face flushed as he buries it against your shoulder. it's sweet in its desperation, his inexperience making him all the more endearing. he's a mess of shaky hands and ragged breaths, and when he finally lets go, he's holding onto you like you're his lifelife, whispering pleas while trembling as ropes of his release stain the inside of his boxers.
"ahh fuuuck, you're amazing."
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lovecoree · 3 days ago
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can you do a smut fic on Felix or hyunjin and they just eat her out till she's begging to stop 😫 please and thank you btw i love your fics especially your bangchan one
omg thank you! I can imagine Hyunjin eating reader out like it’s his last meal! Like he’s just straight up pussy drunk when there having Christmas Eve movie night !
warning; oral sex ( fem receiving ) , not really proof read !
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You felt like you were on cloud nine. Your boyfriend, Hyunjin was settled between your legs, giving you immense pleasure as he fucked you on his tongue. Your begging only fueled his energy as he held your legs open wider with his hands as he sucked harshly on your clit causing your body to jolt a little and back arch off the couch.
“Baby- fuck -baby please.” You didn’t know what you were pleading for, but your words couldn’t get out fast enough while you grip his hair, tugging at it which only made Hyunjin groan from the painful yet satisfying pull to his hair.
You honestly didn’t know how you ended in this position. A Christmas Eve movie night turned into you getting eaten out in a heart beat— not that you’re complaining though.
The Christmas movie playing in the background, long forgotten, the nice night view outside the windows as snow passed by and the night moon shining inside, and you, sprawled out on the couch letting your boyfriend eat you out for hours.
“Hyunjin, fuck wait I need a break.” You begged, lips forming into a pout as you whined still feeling sensitive from the past three orgasms your boyfriend made you go through.
Hyunjin mumbled against your sweet cunt, most likely saying something but he couldn’t find the energy to pull away, licking up your arousal in the process. It was like his weakness. “Baby I can’t hear you.” Breathing out, you took the opportunity to push his head away for a split second, it was like you could finally breathe.
You moaned at the sight of your boyfriend’s handsome face, the dimly lit living room shined just perfectly on his face to show the glistening arousal on his swollen lips and chin. “I said, just give me one more mamas, just one more please.”
He didn’t even let you respond, his eyes low and hazy, mind drunk off your pussy. You let out a cry as he dived back in between your legs. “Please baby.” Your voice came out in a whisper, too weak to say it louder, energy slowly leaving your body. “Fuck, Hyunjin I can’t!”
“Yes you can, you’re doing so good for me.”
Hyunjin moved his hand to rub your clit while tongue fucking you in the process. He looked up at you watching the way you react to his touch. God you look beautiful, your face contorted in pleasure and body shaking from pleasure.
He knew you were close because your moan grew louder and your eyes crossed. He took the initiative to plunge two of his long fingers inside you, curling up inside your sweet spot. He sucked on your clit again, to bring you even closer. “Oh my- fuuck.”
He pulled away from his assault on your clit with a lewd pop, “That’s it mamas, cum for me..god you look so pretty right now.” Hyunjin mumbled, fingers never halting as he fucked them deep inside you in a fast pace. “Shit, I’m cumming.” Hyunjin watched your mouth go wide, a silent cry as the knot in your stomach finally broke, “There you go, there she is.” Hyunjin praised.
Your body slumped into the couch while your boyfriend let you ride out your fourth orgasm. “No more, back up.” You said, finally after calming down. Hyunjin laughed while giving you the most sweetest smile, like he just didn’t eat you out first hours on end.
“Ok ok, no more I promise.” He got up off his knees before helping you up and carrying you to y’all shared bedroom. You looked at him confused for a second, “What about the movie?” Hyunjin only shook his head smirking.
“Oh baby, the movie can wait, I promise not to eat you out, that didn’t apply to me fucking you.”
“Hyunjin!”
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sillymommy6969 · 1 day ago
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.𖥔 ݁ ˖ 𝕰YES ON THEM PT. 2
Manon Bannerman x fem!reader
summary: eyekons gathered evidence of bannern/n from their socials (tweets, instagram posts, tt reposts, etc.)
warnings: fluff, fake everything, over analysis, kinda a blurb
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📌 BANNERN/N STRUGGLING TO KEEP SECRET; a thread
i. Y/N’s Instagram posts 2022 (dream academy)-2024
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Liked by daniela_avanzini, meretmanon & 126,771 others
ynln nyc opening show was a dream come true <3
18th April, 2024
lararajj OMG MOMMY
meganskiendiel just one chance please?
user01 Megan ily but please get in line
user02 MEGAN YOU’RE SO REAL FOR THIS
y0on_cha3 Pretty Y/N :D
meretmanon you’re my dream come true ;)
user03 manon ain’t slick
user04 Yes support your girl ma’am
user05 Manon only opening this app to comment on
Y/N’s post is a mood
user06 @user05 girlie makes an exception
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Liked by lararajj, y0on_cha3 & 11,662 others
ynln missing my tyla (iykyk), but thankful for the break
3rd December, 2022
lararajj Bring me some of your mom's cooking
emilykelavos phone me when you're back pretty
user01 omg predebut emy/n crumbs
user02 Hi Emily!!
sophia_laforteza omg send me that photo of everyone
meretmanon tyla misses you too baby
user03 THEIR PR TEAM SWEATING
user04 guys who's stalking in 2024 and just finding this
user05 I'm not fucking normal about this
user06 WHERE ARE MY BANNERN/N TRUTHERS
< NOW DELETED POST BELOW >
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Liked by sophia_laforteza, meretmanon & 16,043 others
ynln grateful for this valentine's day @meretmanon
14th Janurary, 2023
meganskiendiel Didn't need this on my tl...
lararajj puked seeing this <3
ynln haters hate me cuz they aint me
lararajj if that helps you sleep at night
adelajergova At least ya'll kept it out the rooms!
user01 I just know they're sick of them
user02 ADELA YOURE OUR STRONGEST SOLDIER
meretmanon you’re my dream come true ;)
user03 You guys look great together!
user04 I always knew they were close on DA
user05 WHERE ARE THEIR MEDIA MANAGEMENT
user06 This was pre-debut so they didn’t have it yet
ii. Manon’s tiktok reposts
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iii. The Katz/DA talking about Bannern/n in interviews
When Daniela and Megan were doing their section of a tiktok video for Billboard about how well they knew their members, they were asked “which of the girls’ pulls the hardest”.
“I feel like it’s a tie between Lara and Y/N realistically,” Daniela glanced over at Megan for support.
The Chinese-American hummed in agreement, “Yeah. Lara has this whole girl crush aesthetic goin’ for her and it’s definitely a big hit with a lot of fans. Y/N has a cleaner, old money vibe, so she pulls more with like people we used to meet. Like remember, back in dream academy?”
Daniela laughed, “Yeah, it was so hard tryna eat with her.”
“People would just come and ask her for her number, but she was tak—!” Megan slapped a hand over her mouth, earning a wide-eyed hiss from Daniela. The redhead laughed nervously, shaking her head to dismiss what she almost said. “She just wasn’t interested, so she’d turn down so many people.”
“So yeah, definitely Lara or Y/N pulls the hardest.”
In another interview of Sophia and Manon talking about how they balance their work and life, the Filipina shared ways she kicks back on days off to make sure she put self care first.
“Yeah, I love cooking for the girls, it relaxes me.”
Manon raised her mic, “I think we also just all go out together and hang out like normal friends, y’know. We go out to dinner, go to the movies and go shopping when we can.”
“Yeah, I remember when we first debuted, you and Y/N would go out together a lot.” Sophia mentioned without realizing.
Manon eyed the camera, nodding her head.
“Yeah, retail therapy solves everything,” Manon joked, “I do enjoy a good trip to the mall and like a long night out with all of us when we’re free. Super therapeutic.”
On Emily’s instagram live, questions about Manon and Y/N’s relationship during the survival show were asked.
“Wow, you guys are going straight to the point, huh?” she chuckled, “Y/N and I were pretty close on dream academy, but her and Manon were 100% closer. The management liked pairing them together a lot on the show cuz they looked really good together onstage, but they spent so much—and I mean, so much—time together off set.”
user01 is y/n currently dating anybody?
user02 when did you last talk to y/n?
“Y/N and I still talk a lot, but she’s really busy. She called me a couple days ago, but yeah, I really miss her.” Emily pouted, “I am not sure about her personal life, but that’s not a secret I’m in a position to share.”
The blonde’s face visibly irked, her expression changing when she spotted a comment about Y/N’s old instagram posts.
“I just know Y/N has a good thing going in her life right now. She really loves what she does and she loves all the support you guys show them.” Emily nodded, “And honestly, at the end of the day, the real fans will support Y/N through whatever.”
VIEW MORE OF THIS THREAD?
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vmqires · 3 days ago
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sorrow. (l.hs)
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pairing. ex! hee x fem reader ❦︎ exes to lovers ; non-idol au, a bit of angst n fluff. wc. 986 synopsis. heeseung’s forced to break up w u but the two of u never move on from each other.
a/n: this took so long, i was seriously debating deleting this and quitting forever LMAO but thankfully the amazing @soadparker (aka vic) gave me some ideas n that encouraged me to finish it >< this was obviously inspired by sorrow - flyleaf, which i totally recommend to listen to while reading.
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sometimes life seems to quiet into paralyzing silence.
“what do you mean? you want to break up?” your eyes start to tear up.
“y/n.. it’s just not working out anymore.” heeseung looks away, fidgeting with his hands.
“what? what happened? what went wrong?” you stare at him in disbelief. just a few days ago he was in your arms, whispering that you’re his safe place and now he wants to break up?
“nothing went wrong. i just.. i need some time, for myself.” he gets up from the couch, looking at you one last time before leaving.
truth is heeseung didn’t want to break up with you. but after a very long argument with his very strict family, they forced him to. it broke him seeing you like that.
someone so perfect, heartbroken all because his family couldn’t stand the sight of you and him together.
i’ll take this piece of you, and hope for all eternity.
his parents constantly introduced him to girls that they thought were absolutely perfect for him. every time he went on a date with one of them, they all seem to fall short compared to you.
he misses you, a lot. hoping for one day his parents will back off, also hoping you don’t find someone new, someone maybe even.. better.
after a month since he broke up with you, you went to your best friend who comforted you.. just in a different way.
“get up, let’s go to the club.” she says, looking at you crying.
“the club? seriously? i’m heartbroken and you’re suggesting the club?” your friend rolls her eyes.
“he’s just a bump in the road amongst other bumps you’ll encounter. it’s not the end of the world.” you scoff, holding your pillow tighter. “he’s not a bump, he’s a mountain i can’t cross over.”
she sucks her teeth at your dramatic response. “girl shut the fuck up.”
he knew each tear before it came.
few months pass and you feel like you’re healing. seeing a new guy and although deep down somewhere in your heart you wish he was heeseung, you settle.
“babe! ready to go?” your new boyfriend yells from the kitchen. “just a sec!” you grab your keys and phone. today’s heeseung’s birthday, your calendar app reminds you.
as your boyfriend drives, you can’t help but think about heeseung and the many birthdays the two of you spent together. one specific comes to mind.
“open your eyes.” heeseung whispers in your ear. when you do, you’re met with a fort made of blankets, pillows, your favorite snacks and a projector playing your favorite movie.
that week had been hard for you. your manager at work on your ass, fighting with your parents again, grades falling behind, all you wanted to do was lay in his arms and the best of all, he knew that.
he knew you like no other. you tear up, and heeseung wipes it away as he cups your face.
“i know you had a hard week and i just want you to relax for your birthday so, i completed a few homework assignments and i called your parents.” you immediately pull him into a hug, a much needed hug.
just like the one you need right now. instead of heeseung, the wind wipes your tear away and your new boyfriend glances at you as he drives.
“everything okay?” you lift your head, giving him a weak smile.
“yeah everything’s fine.” he nods and smiles at you too.
if it were heeseung he would’ve already pulled over and pulled you onto his lap to whisper sweet nothings in your ear.
and we kiss each other one more time.
heeseung was drowning. he needed an out and now. he wanted to text you, to see you again. god his heart ached every time he thought about you.
how the two of you would have fights but would never go to sleep angry at each other, how much he fell for you everyday, how you would snuggle closer to him.
the thoughts become overbearing and soon enough, he chooses you. over his family, over everything because you are his everything. he finally leaves home without a word or a letter.
as he settles into his new place, he debates calling you.
you, on the other hand, end up breaking up with your boyfriend after realizing maybe a part of you is still in love with heeseung. (you totally are.)
the week after that breakup, you head out to the city. window shopping, walking around, just to clear your head.
heeseung just so happened to be doing the same thing. minding his own business, going about his afternoon. then he stops in his tracks, eyes widen with tears threatening to spill out.
“y/n…” he lets out in a whisper, now almost sprinting towards you. you notice him, as soon as he takes you into his embrace. your world narrows down to just to two of you, like it used to. you pull away first.
“heeseung?” he immediately tears up again.
“i’m so sorry y/n. im so sorry for leaving you.” his heart is on fire, praying you’d take him back. “please let me make it up to you. let me explain everything.”
your own eyes start to water, smiling at him. “please..” he whispers, resting his forehead against yours.
without a doubt, you wrap your arms around his neck and pressed your lips on his. the kiss is gentle, full of warmth and love. your love.
“so is that a yes?” he murmurs against your lips then you laugh softly, pulling back. “yes. it’s a yes.” you reply, knowing your heart will always and forever be his, his alone.
just like his heart is yours.
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moonylvs · 3 days ago
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— ⋆˙⟡ A Lovely Christmas
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Summary: Coming back to your small hometown for Christmas after years in the city doesn't sound very exciting, but the warmth of the town, the smell of cookies and a woman with a delicious wooden scent make you think that maybe Christmas won't be so bad.
Dedicated to @kousanosgf I hope you like it and have a Merry Christmas, xoxo.
Pairing: Sevika x fem!reader
Words: +6k (I lost count, but this is long)
ⓘ Warnings: Mostly fluff, modern au, cliche, a bit of soft!sevika (Someone give this woman a hug), hallmark kind of movie, use of yn once, no proofread, lmk if I miss anything!
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Coming back to your hometown was not the way you expected to spend Christmas, but here you were, in that little town where snowfalls were an everyday thing, that little place where everyone knew each other, you didn't know whether to love it or hate it.
In just a week that you had been in that little town you had already been greeted and hugged by half of the population, all telling you “How big you are” and how “much you have changed”, even some old ladies who even if you tried hard you couldn't remember, called you beautiful and said they remembered you as a baby.
You did not consider yourself the most sociable or friendly person, years in the city and a dozen rude people had made you become a rather closed and some would even say bitter, you had to admit that you had lost a little Christmas spirit, not that your small apartment in the big city allowed you to do much, you just put some Christmas decorations on the front door to not feel out of place with the other neighbors.
But other than that, your Christmas the last few years had been boring and lonely, your work consumed most of your time and without many close friends you had no one to spend the holidays with.
So here you were, in that small town, it was all a rushed decision, after years you finally got a well deserved vacation from your job, but the moment they gave you the news you couldn't help but ask yourself, what the fuck do I do now?
You thought about staying at home, rest and sleep as much as you needed, or maybe travel to some extravagant place, you had the savings for that, but at the same time it felt so…empty.
You spent a whole day tossing and turning in bed in your apartment, trying to think of something to do so that your vacation wouldn't become a routine of rolling around in bed and overthinking.
That's when your gaze fell on your bedside table, where there was a picture of your family, when you were just a little girl, you were covered in so many clothes that you were sure you could barely walk, but your smile was pure, full of happiness.
So you thought, why not go back to that place, where there were so many memories, you knew it probably wouldn't be the same, your parents were no longer there to cheer you up in those cold days, you didn't even know if your old friends were still living in that small town or if they had left for the city like you, but at this point you didn't have many options and what better than spending Christmas in a small town where Christmas is such a beloved tradition.
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You didn't know at what point you thought it was a good idea to buy so many Christmas decorations and stuff, but here you were, carrying at least a dozen boxes and bags, each one with ornaments, old-fashioned decorations, garlands and you even remembered to buy a ridiculous Christmas sweater.
You could barely stand, maybe everything would be easier if you had brought your car with you, but in that small town everyone was in the habit of walking and your house was not too far from the center of town.
While you were trying to get to your house you couldn't avoid bumping into some people, you didn't remember that there were so many people in the town, but now you were sure that the population had at least doubled.
You were starting to feel tired, you had to admit that it wasn't your best idea to buy all those things knowing that you had to carry them back home.
At this point you felt your legs ache, you were freezing and desperately needed to eat something, for a moment you stood in the middle of the sidewalk, rethinking your life decisions, you were sure that your hands had the marks of the handles of the bags and half of your vision was obstructed by the boxes you were holding.
When one of the bags slipped from your hand it was the final straw, you knew that to pick it up you would have to bend down and first of all your legs hurt, but more importantly, the rest of the stuff would fall out, your eyes closed in frustration, letting out an exaggerated sigh.
Fuck, fuck Christmas, fuck the Christmas spirit and fuck you and your compulsive shopping.
“Need some help, sweetheart?” a voice snapped you out of your thoughts, causing you to open your eyes, though the boxes still obstructed your vision.
“Yeah, thanks” You said quietly, not caring who it was that had spoken to you, you only felt the frustration disappear a little when that person held the boxes that obstructed your vision with ease and handed you the small bag you had dropped, at least you didn't feel like you were carrying weights anymore.
“I didn't remember you liked those ridiculous sweaters” Your gaze lifted suddenly, now recognizing that voice, but above all that scent, of fresh wood.
“Sevika” The name came naturally out of your mouth, without thinking.
The woman smiled slightly as she listened to you, taking some of the bags you were holding as she saw that you still seemed to be having trouble with the weight of them.
“I didn't know you were back in town, I thought you were already a city girl” Sevika said with that typical sarcasm you still remembered, you couldn't help but scoff slightly, you had lost count of how many people in town had said that to you.
“I just came to spend the holidays here, but I forgot how much you walk in this town” You said with some frustration, it was true that the big city was full of cabs and means of transportation that made your life easier, while here, most if not all, walked.
There were only a few people who owned a car, among them, sevika.
“Do you want me to give you a ride home? I see walking is no longer your thing” Sevika said with amusement, although her offer was sincere. You could still remember the years when both were young and would walk all over town, buying Christmas cookies and running errands for your parents.
“Yeah, I could really use a ride, I'm freezing” You admitted with amusement, letting sevika guide you to her car across the street.
You had to admit you weren't surprised at the ease with which sevika carried your stuff, she was always taller and stronger than the rest, you had to blame her parents' job ( probably hers now) for this.
Sevika placed the boxes and bags on the back seats of the truck, before opening the door for you with a smirk, to which you rolled your eyes.
That truck was the same one you remembered seeing as a child, the one that Sevika's father drove around the small town, bringing Christmas trees and firewood to all the residents, you had to say that although it was old it was in very good condition.
“Your family still sells firewood and Christmas trees?” You asked calmly the moment Sevika started the car, she didn't even bother to ask if you were still living in the same place, she knew you were.
“Yeah, my father passed the business down to me a few years ago, he said he was too old to keep working, but I think he really just wanted me to have a job and stop going from bar to bar” Sevika explained with a smile, you didn't doubt it would have been like that, when they were young Sevika was always the topic of conversation in town, some older men even said she would be a problem, but here you were now, almost 15 years later and Sevika seemed to be anything but a problem.
It didn't take long to get to your house, in fact, now you felt a little embarrassed because your house was too close and you could have easily walked there, but you were thankful that at least sevika didn't mention anything about it.
When you arrived home Sevika was quick to come down and open the door for you before starting to unload the boxes and bags from the back seats, while you hurried to open the front door, wanting to take shelter from the winter cold.
Upon entering the house you immediately felt relieved, it was as warm as you expected and you finally stopped feeling like you were freezing.
Sevika came in behind you carrying the boxes and bags, leaving them on the dining room table, the place was just as she remembered it.
It was obvious that you had been away from the village, because most of the people were already used to the cold while you were freezing with just a little while outside.
“Would you like some hot chocolate? For helping me out” You offered with a small smile, though you didn't even wait for an answer before you started walking to the kitchen.
Sevika rolled her eyes at this, but only hummed in approval, it wouldn't hurt to have a cup of hot chocolate, plus she wasn't planning on refusing to spend a little time with you.
You prepared the drink quickly, the smell bringing back memories of your childhood and Christmases in that place.
“Here” you murmured, handing a cup to sevika, it took you by surprise that sevika laughed, but you soon realized that the cup you had given her was yours, how did you know this? Because of the ridiculous drawing on the mug, which was a picture of the grinch.
“You never change from what I see” Sevika said mockingly, to which you rolled your eyes and snatched the cup from her hands, handing her the one that had no ridiculous drawing and was of a flat color.
Sevika tried to hold back her smile, despite the years you were still somewhat childish and stubborn, but something about it gave her comfort, despite the years, you hadn't changed.
“What made you come back after so many years?” sevika asked calmly after a few minutes in a comfortable silence.
You hesitated for a moment, taking a sip of your hot chocolate while you thought, even you didn't quite know the reason, you didn't want to say it was an impulsive decision, but at the same time it was as if something drew you back to that place.
“I don't know, I guess I needed a break from the city” you murmured, although the truth is that you didn't just need a break, you were looking for that comfort of the town, the one you had in your childhood, but you didn't even know if you would still find that comfort in the town after years.
Sevika just hummed in approval, she knew you weren't saying everything, but she wasn't going to push you to say more, you had always preferred to keep some things to yourself and Sevika knew that.
“Well, anyway…I'm glad you're back.” Sevika said with a gentle smile, taking a last sip from her mug before setting it down in the sink.
You couldn't explain why but something stirred in you, an electrifying current ran through your body at her words, you stood still for a moment, before snapping back to reality as you saw sevika take her coat and walk towards the door, running away after dropping a bomb, all in all things hadn't changed.
Without thinking your body instinctively moved after sevika, catching up with her at the door.
“Hope to see you around, call me if you need anything, love” Sevika said casually, opening the door and walking towards her truck, as always without looking back, but this time you were thankful she didn't, because she would have seen the embarrassing red color that flooded your cheeks at that nickname she hadn't used in years.
When Sevika's truck was finally far enough away from your sight, you went back into the house, closing the door behind you and leaning against it, lowering yourself down until you were sitting on the floor.
What the fuck was wrong with you? Why did you suddenly feel like a teenage girl having her first crush on a girl? Damn it, this couldn't be happening to you.
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The next few days you tried to keep your mind busy, but those simple words from sevika wouldn't leave your head and that was killing you, you wanted to believe that it didn't mean anything, you and sevika had been friends when you were young, of course she would be happy to see you after years and the nickname, oh that damn nickname, of course it didn't mean anything either, she also called you that when you were young, you didn't even know how it started, you only knew that she only called you that, you and nobody else.
You were so deep in your thoughts that you didn't even hear the truck park in your house, not that you were going to notice it, you were trying to untangle that strip of lights, maybe you should have done it before climbing the stairs, but here you were, three meters above the ground, untangling a strip of lights and praying not to fall.
“All right up there, love?” That voice brought you out of your thoughts all of a sudden, for a moment you thought that now you were crazy, now you were hallucinating her voice?
But the sound of footsteps in the snow made you realize that in fact you were not hallucinating, without thinking your gaze went to the ground, seeing the figure of sevika, by god how good she looked from up there.
“Do you need help? I don't want you to fall on me, love” Sevika said with a smirk, her tone slightly mocking, but her gaze was fixed on you, as if she was actually expecting you to fall and hurt yourself, she even moved a little closer to the ladder.
“I'm not going to fall” You muttered with some annoyance, returning to your task of untangling the lights, trying with all your might to ignore sevika's presence, but it wasn't working, not at all.
Until this moment you hadn't taken into account that you were so far away from the ground, you looked at sevika again and this time the ground looked much farther, God, way too far, you didn't think you would die if you fell but it would definitely hurt.
“Get down from there and let me help you” Sevika said, this time her tone more gentle, seeming to notice your growing anxiety.
This time you didn't protest, leaving the lights there and starting to slowly descend the ladder, you were sure the ladder wasn't shaking so much when you climbed up, nor that the ground was so far away.
When you were halfway down the stairs you felt hands on your waist and soon your feet were on the ground again, which you were grateful for, you felt you would never finish coming down.
“Thank you” you murmured softly to sevika, lightly fixing your clothes, you were still a little anxious, you weren't even afraid of heights, you didn't understand where that momentary fear had come from.
“You're welcome, love” Sevika said kindly, her gaze sweeping over you, checking that you were okay. “Let me help you with this, yeah?” sevika asked, giving you a small smile, to which you nodded, her help would be very useful, you didn't want to climb that ladder again.
For a moment you realized that sevika had come to your house out of nowhere, which was strange.
“So what were you doing here?” you asked after a few minutes of silence, while sevika placed the Christmas lights calmly, although you felt on edge thinking that she could fall.
“I came to bring you some firewood, when I came you didn't have any, I thought you must be freezing” Sevika replied casually, brushing some snow off the roof, by god, how was he not freezing his hands off.
You frowned slightly, you hadn't even noticed that you didn't actually have any firewood, you had been living under the blankets freezing so much that you didn't think to light the fireplace.
“I'm almost done, would you mind giving me something to drink?” Sevika said after a few minutes in silence, to which you nodded immediately, walking into the house and pouring her some coffee, you prepared it as you always did, you didn't consider that maybe sevika wouldn't want it as sweet���.
In a few minutes you came out with two cups of coffee, but as soon as you set foot in the snow you felt something cold hit your head, snow.
A loud laugh came from beside you, you looked up a little and there was Sevika, still on the ladder cleaning the snow from the roof, with a smile on her face, you couldn't remember ever seeing her smile like that.
You snorted falsely offended, feeling the snow on your head and seeing some flakes in the locks in front of you, you were thankful that nothing had fallen into the cups.
“Sorry, love, I didn't know you were there” Sevika said with amusement, although maybe she had seen you standing there, but she wasn't going to admit it. Sevika couldn't help but laugh as she came down the ladder and saw your hair white from the snow, her hand went to your hair, shaking it out a bit and brushing some of the snow out, even though you ended up a bit disheveled.
You just rolled your eyes, not being able to contain a giggle, careful not to burn yourself you handed the cup of coffee to sevika, instantly you noticed her frown slightly frowned when she saw the liquid in the cup.
“Don't tell me you like black coffee because I swear I'll throw you out of my house” You said in disbelief, staring at sevika, who only laughed lightly before shaking her head.
“It's just that this looks more like milk with a bit of coffee than coffee with milk” Sevika said mockingly, taking a sip of the coffee, though to her surprise, it was quite good, much less strong than what she usually drank, but not bad.
You smiled at her expression, which clearly showed that she liked it.
“I knew you'd like it” You replied with obviousness, giving her a proud smile, and sevika had to hold back with all her strength to say, 'I'd like anything that came from you'.
You both spent a few minutes in a comfortable silence, you watched the house, which now had Christmas lights and some decorations here and there, but sevika's gaze wasn't on the decorations, she didn't give a damn if santa was coming down the chimney, her gaze was fixed on you.
Despite the years for sevika you were still the same, your eyes were still huge and sparkled when you saw something you liked, you still covered your mouth when you laughed even though your smile was beautiful, your cheeks still blushed with the cold and you still had that habit of biting your lip when you were anxious.
Despite the years you were still you and sevika couldn't be happier with this, sevika thought that by going to the city and living so many years there, when you came back (if you did) you wouldn't be the same, she thought that maybe she wouldn't even be able to recognize you.
“Sev?”
Your voice brought sevika out of her thoughts, who hadn't even noticed that she had been staring at you and hadn't heard you speak.
“Yeah, sorry, what were you saying?” Sevika said, trying to sound as casual as possible, but your couldn't help but laugh slightly, even though you knew better than to tease her with this.
“I was telling you that if you were on your way to the town center…I wanted to know if maybe you could give me a ride” You explained with a small smile, trying to convince the woman.
Christmas Eve was tomorrow and you still wanted to buy some things, you didn't even know what you were going to do it for if you didn't plan for anyone to visit you but you still wanted to decorate and prepare some food, maybe you could give it to the people in the neighborhood, you remembered your parents doing it when you were little.
“Yeah sure, I was going to buy some stuff anyway, I can take you” Sevika replied calmly, finishing the coffee in her cup. “I'll take the Firewood inside and then we'll go, yeah?”
You nodded slightly, taking her empty mug and accompanying her inside while she carried the wood for the fireplace.
After leaving the empty cups in the kitchen, you went to get your purse, taking out some money, by the time you came out, Sevika was already waiting for you outside, leaning against her truck with a cigarette in her mouth.
You didn't want to admit it but she looked absolutely stunning, over the years she had grown a lot taller and her body was more muscular, probably because of her job.
You tried to shake those thoughts from your mind, but the blush had already grown across your cheeks.
“See something you like, love?” Sevika asked with a smirk, taking another drag on her cigarette.
You wanted to make a remark, to answer her, but you only felt your face turn redder, all you could do was roll your eyes and mutter a “shut up'”.
Without another word you walked towards the truck, Sevika still with a smirk opened the door of the truck for you, and then got in as well.
“Here, for the firewood” You said, extending the money to Sevika without looking at her, still feeling your face redden.
Sevika frowned, pushing your hand with the money gently.
“You don't have to pay me” Sevika replied sternly, starting the van towards town.
You rolled your eyes, extending the money towards Sevika again.
”Yes I do, just take it, will you?“” You said again, firewood was sevika's job and you weren't going to let her give you something for free.
“Love” Sevika called, catching your attention, damn it, she knew the effect that stupid nickname had on you. “I don't want you to pay me, I don't need you to pay me, so give it up, yes?”
Sevika's firm voice didn't let you contradict her, so you simply left quiet, still somewhat frustrated, but you knew there was no point in arguing, besides even if you didn't want to admit it, that nickname had convinced you a little.
The drive into town wasn't very long, the streets were flooded with people, all shopping for Christmas dinners.
Sevika quietly got out of the car, opening the door for you and helping you out, smiling slightly as your feet sank into the snow, you definitely should have chosen other shoes.
“Thank you for bringing me and for the firewood” You said softly, giving Sevika a small smile, your thanks were sincere, those small acts were huge for you.
“You're welcome love, do you want me to take you back when you're done?” Sevika asked to which you shook your head instantly, she had already done too much, you didn't want to take advantage of her kindness.
“No, no, don't bother, I'll just buy a few things and take a walk around town, thanks anyway sev” You said kindly, giving Sevika a sweet smile, to which she nodded slightly, saying goodbye and walking in the opposite direction to you.
The town was still the same as it was years ago, snow covered the streets and people were enjoying their Christmas shopping.
You spent some time going through each store, buying some ingredients for cooking, some gifts for your co-workers and just window shopping.
“Oh god, it's really you yn?” A voice behind you made its presence known, you instantly turned around, recognizing that sweet-eyed lady.
“Mrs. Smith, it's been a long time” You said in a friendly voice, walking up to greet the woman.
“I had heard you were back but I wanted to check it out myself” Said the woman with a sweet smile, which you reciprocated, it had been years since you had been in that town but there were people you never forgot.
“Ah yes, I just came to spend the vacations around here” You said kindly.
“I'm glad to see you here, I see the years did you good!” the woman remarked with a smile, squeezing your cheek affectionately, you couldn't help blushing slightly, feeling embarrassed for a moment, it was true that you had changed too much in these years.
“I saw you talking to Sevika, I'm glad to hear you're still friends” The woman said sympathetically, though there was something in her voice, nostalgia perhaps? “Sevika doesn't visit town much these days, she's always with work, so it's nice to see her around and more so happy like this.”
Your cheeks instantly turned red at the old woman's comment, you didn't even know this about sevika, you remembered that she used to be very sociable when she was little, running around town from place to place, so you had to admit you were a bit surprised.
“She doesn't visit the town much?” You repeated with curiosity and some confusion, the Sevika you remembered spent all her time in town.
“Not these days, after the death of her parents she took refuge in her home and work, I don't blame her…”
You couldn't even continue listening to the woman's words, you remained static, your mind blank.
Sevika's parents had died? How could you not have heard? You felt the air disappear from your lungs, sure, it had been a while since you had visited the village, but you still vividly remembered sevika's family, the one your parents used to visit at Christmas and who always made sure to give you presents.
“Her parents died? When?” you asked totally shocked, your face still slightly pale.
“Oh dear, didn't you know?” The woman said empathetically, bringing a hand to her chest. “It was a year ago now, the whole town suffered their loss, you know they were very loved…”
Your chest squeezed even tighter, how come you hadn't heard about it? Those people had welcomed you into their home a dozen times, they were loyal to their people and had a huge heart.
For a moment you felt your chest hurt too much, even more so because of Sevika, you didn't know and you didn't even get to say anything to her all this time, now you felt even worse, what if she thought you knew and you just didn't care?
The mere thought made your chest hurt, you couldn't leave it like this, you didn't want it to stay like this.
“I'm sorry ma'am, I have to go, it was nice to see you” You said politely, quickly saying goodbye to the woman and leaving the store.
You started walking through the streets of the town, it was starting to get dark and people were starting to go home, looking for shelter from the cold of the night.
Out of the corner of your eye you could see sevika, loading some groceries into her truck, without thinking you crossed the street, walking towards her, you didn't even know what you were supposed to say to her.
“Oh hi love, did you change your mind?” sevika asked calmly, about to take your shopping bags.
You didn't know what to say, you couldn't just say “oh I just heard your parents died, I'm sorry, I know it seems like I'm an insensitive piece of shit but I'm not!”
“Is something wrong?” Sevika asked with confusion when you wouldn't let her take the shopping bags.
“Ah? Oh, no, I just…” Shit why couldn't you stop stuttering.
“Do you want to come spend Christmas at my house?” You asked without thinking, your words coming out too fast that it took Sevika a few seconds to understand what you had said.
You immediately regretted it when you noticed that she didn't respond right away.
“You don't have to come, it was just an invitation, I was thinking of making cookies and baking something-” You quickly started to explain, your voice sounding more unsure than you would have liked, but Sevika interrupted you with a soft laugh.
“Love, relax, I would love to go, I was just taken by surprise by your invitation” Sevika said kindly as she noticed your concern over her response. “May I ask why the invitation so suddenly?”
You were quiet for a moment, hesitating how to answer, but simply sighed for a moment before speaking.
“I…I don't want you to spend Christmas alone, I'm here so I figured we could spend it together” You admitted quietly, unable to look Sevika in the eyes.
Sevika fell silent, the realization hitting her, you knew about her parents, someone had told you.
Sevika sighed lightly, bringing her fingers to the bridge of her nose.
“Who told you?” Sevika asked quietly, though she didn't sound upset, not with you.
“Mrs. Smith… I hadn't heard, I'm really sorry, I wish I had been here…been here for you” You said softly, feeling your chest tighten, you couldn't help but feel horrible, for not being there for her.
Sevika instantly shook her head, moving closer to you, bringing one of her hands to your chin, causing you to lift your head to look at her.
“You don't have to apologize, I know you didn't know” Sevika said softly, her tone more calm and understanding.
“I'm really sorry Sevika, I know they loved you so much” You said softly, this time looking Sevika in the eyes and for a moment you felt like you could see a momentary flash of vunerability, of pain.
You didn't know if it was the right thing to do, but you closed the distance between the two of you, hugging Sevika tightly, you wanted to show her that you cared, that you understood her pain.
Sevika was static for a moment, surprised by the sudden contact, she was never a fan of physical contact, but in that moment it felt so…comfortable.
In just a few seconds she hugged you back, sinking into the warmth of your body, for a moment she felt so vunerable, and for the first time she didn't mind.
Your embrace felt so perfect, so comfortable, after months she finally felt comforted.
Don't misunderstand her, the whole town had been there for her, giving her condolences and supporting her, but deep down Sevika didn't feel consoled, she didn't think anyone understood her pain, not like you.
You had been there in her childhood, you knew her parents, you knew how much they meant to Sevika, you knew and understood her, like no one else.
“Believe me I would have loved to have been here for you, I'm so sorry you had to go through this…. I know they loved you too much” You murmured softly, still not separating from sevika, you could swear she didn't want to separate either.
Sevika had no words, she couldn't say anything, at that moment she simply felt understood, your embrace alone gave her that comfort she was looking for, that she needed so much.
“My invitation for Christmas is still open, I'd really like to spend Christmas with you” You said softly, feeling Sevika separate just a little, just enough to just see your face.
“You don't have to feel pity for me, love, I don't want to be a bother in your house-” Sevika began to say, her tone slightly defensive at first, though still somewhat soft, probably because it was you.
You instantly frowned, shaking your head and interrupting her.
“Sevika, no, I'm not inviting you out of pity or anything, I'm serious when I say I want to spend Christmas with you” You said firmly, this time looking Sevika in the eyes, and she saw nothing but sincerity in you.
Still Sevika remained silent, there was something in her that was still defensive, that told her she couldn't let her guard down, that you were only inviting her out of pity.
“Let me take you home, love” Sevika murmured, finally letting go, even though she didn't want to, you instantly felt an emptiness, why did being in her arms feel so good?
The drive to your house was silent, neither of you said anything, you didn't know what to say or how to break the silence, and Sevika didn't seem to mind.
When you arrived at your house Sevika opened the door for you and brought down your groceries, making sure you got in the house.
“Thank you” You said softly, standing at the front door entrance, Sevika nodded slightly, before she could make the eagerness to turn around you spoke, '“My invitation still stands, just think about it, yeah?…There is no one else I would like to spend Christmas with” You admitted softly, giving sevika a small smile, you knew you were too direct, but at that moment you couldn't care less.
Sevika's eyes seemed to sparkle, she hesitated for a moment before she nodded slightly, you didn't know if she accepted or just simply gave in, but you didn't have the courage to ask.
At that moment you just watched Sevika leave in silence, getting into her truck without another word and disappearing down the snowy road.
Deep down and even if you didn't dare to admit it quietly, you hoped that Sevika would accept, that the next day she would show up at your door, you really wanted it.
Christmas Eve came, you spent the whole afternoon cooking all kinds of dishes, you didn't even know if Sevika would appear, but something deep inside you wanted to believe it, you desired to believe it.
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The sky slowly began to darken, your house was illuminated by the Christmas lights that Sevika had hung.
After hours in the kitchen you finally finished, looking at the table in front of you with satisfaction, there was food, cookies and so on, you tried to recreate all those dishes you had eaten in your childhood.
The doorbell rang and you practically jumped in your place, you stood there for a moment, thinking you had imagined that sound.
But after a few seconds you moved quickly to the door, fixing your clothes and your hair lightly.
You couldn't help but feel anxious, your heart was pounding too hard and your head was racing too fast.
The moment you opened the door your heart stopped, Sevika was standing in front of you, looking spectacular, in her hands was a bouquet of flowers and a gift bag.
“Hi, love” Sevika's voice was soft and sweet, you couldn't even say a word, to say you were gawking was an understatement, all you could do was invite her in, moving to the side and opening the door for her.
Sevika smiled lightly, stepping inside and closing the door behind her.
“I brought you this” Sevika said softly, extending the bouquet and gift bag to you.
You blinked a couple of times before taking both, but before sevika said anything else you walked over to her, wrapping her in your arms gently.
“Thanks for coming, sev” You murmured softly, feeling your cheeks redden.
Almost instantly sevika's arms were around your body, wrapping you gently, careful not to crush the flowers or the gift.
“Thank you for inviting me, love” Sevika replied sweetly, leaving a small kiss on your forehead.
To say you were happy was an understatement, you felt like an excited little girl at Christmas, you had spent all afternoon preparing a beautiful dinner and now Sevika was there to enjoy it, you couldn't ask for more.
After a few seconds you separated from Sevika, taking the gift and the flowers with one hand while with the other you took Sevika's hand, leading her towards the dining room.
Sevika couldn't help but smile at seeing you so excited, she didn't hesitate for a second to follow you, her eyes widening in wonder at the sight of all the food on the table.
That table looked like something out of a magazine, there was all kinds of food, desserts, sevika couldn't even recognize half of the dishes there, she just knew it looked delicious.
“I spent the whole afternoon cooking, I don't know what you like so I prepared many things…” You explained with a small smile, while looking at the table full of food.
“Everything looks delicious love” Sevika replied instantly, giving you the sweetest smile you had ever seen on her.
Almost instantly your cheeks reddened, you couldn't hide the smile on your face nor your happiness, everything felt like a movie.
After sevika admired the food you invited her to sit down, it was already dinner time and you were excited for her to try every dish.
The moment sevika put a spoonful of food in her mouth her eyes practically sparkled, a low humming moan came out of her mouth, showing you that she definitely liked it.
“This is delicious, my goodness” Sevika said with a smile, shoving bite after bite into her mouth.
You couldn't hide your happiness, you made her try all the dishes and left the desserts for the end, even though sevika seemed to be completely full, she didn't refuse to try any of your dishes, telling you how good each one was over and over again.
When you both finished dinner you decided to go to the living room to watch a Christmas movie, sevika hated them, but she didn't have the heart to tell you so she just nodded and sat with you on the couch, trying not to roll her eyes at every ridiculously romantic scene.
Without even noticing it, as the movie went on you and sevika ended up snuggled up next to each other, sevika's arm that was initially on the couch behind you, was now on your shoulders, tracing patterns on your arm gently.
You didn't hesitate to snuggle up next to her, until you were leaning against her side, feeling the warmth of her body sheltering you from the cold.
That position was the most comfortable, it felt so familiar and so real, your head couldn't think of anything else but Sevika and how good it felt to be this close to her.
At one point sevika's gaze wasn't even on the movie anymore, but on your face, staring at you and noticing every expression on your face, from your smiles to the pink color that appeared on your cheeks when the main characters kissed, sevika could only think about you and didn't want to think about anything else.
While you were watching the movie you were eating the cookies you had prepared, which sevika complimented a dozen times, saying that you had a lot of talent for baking.
Sevika's gaze fell on you when you took a last bite of your cookie and after a few seconds a smile appeared on her face, noticing that you had some icing on the corner of your lips.
You couldn't help but be surprised when sevika gently took your chin without saying a word, her gaze was fixed on your lips and you swore you couldn't be redder.
Sevika's thumb carefully ran over the corner of your lips, wiping away the icing that was there, you immediately felt embarrassed, feeling stupid for believing that Sevika was looking at you with other intentions, for imagining how good her lips would feel on yours.
Sevika seemed to notice the blush on your cheeks and her mouth curved into a slight smile, without another word her hand moved from your chin to your cheek, her hand caressing lightly.
You felt like your heart was pounding out of your chest, your eyes practically glowed at the sight of Sevika and she clearly noticed it, as her eyes glowed the same way as she connected her gaze with yours.
You both stayed like that for a few seconds, your faces so close that sevika could see every detail of your face, a gleam ran through her eyes and without another word her lips met yours.
Her lips felt like heaven on yours, they were firm yet so gentle, loving was the only word that came to your mind.
You instantly kissed her back, bringing your hand to her neck and pulling her closer.
Sevika felt like she could melt under your touch, your lips were the sweetest thing she had ever tasted, she could feel the sweet taste of your cookies and the strawberry flavor of your lipstick, it was the best combination she had ever tasted, the softness and sweetness with which you kissed her made her feel butterflies as if she was a teenager.
She didn't know how long you spent kissing until you had to pull away for air, sevika reluctantly pulled away, her hand still on your cheek, holding you gently.
The moment sevika saw your face a smile spread across her face, you looked absolutely beautiful, your lips slightly puffy and your cheeks flushed, your eyes shining with love, it was the best sight.
“You look absolutely gorgeous” Sevika admitted without thinking, her thumb caressing your cheek and feeling her heart melt as you leaned into her touch.
Your hand went to sevika's on your cheek, holding it sweetly as your eyes closed for a second, enjoying the warmth of her touch.
When your eyes opened your gaze was fixed on sevika, roaming over every detail of her face, her lips, her shining eyes, every little scar on her face.
“You're staring, love” sevika murmured softly, her lips curving into a small smile.
“I know” You replied without looking away, instead you moved closer, leaving another soft kiss on her lips, which sevika responded to instantly.
“I love you” You said softly as you broke away from the kiss, sevika's hand stopped on your cheek, looking at you in disbelief for a second, those words felt a thousand times more powerful coming from you.
Sevika pressed her lips to yours again, this time in a sweet and gentle way, before pulling you into an embrace, holding you against her chest.
“I love you… More than you can imagine” Sevika murmured softly, leaving a kiss on your forehead.
At that moment you felt your heart melt, you could hear the beating of her heart and feel the warmth of her body, at that moment you knew you didn't need anything else, this was all you had wished for.
That night was beautiful, you could only call it a lovely Christmas.
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a/n: All I can say is that I love this!!! I think I got a little excited and made it too long but I really love this, I know it's very cliché but that's literally the point! I hope you liked it and remember that reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated, have a merry Christmas Eve and Merry Christmas, love u, xoxo.
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novantinuum · 3 days ago
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Reformation ref sheet for an AU Steven (named "Astra") who's been invading my brain since like,, April. It's VERY wide, apologies. There's a lot going on here because this man is incredibly old and has poofed way too many times for varying reasons. (See This post for how I headcanon that Steven can poof and still be considered a hybrid being.)
While I will not talk in huge length about certain aspects of his AU on this blog due to some of it involving strong NSFW themes, there is a ridiculous amount of other lore I've developed over time for Astra, and I love him to death. He is my sad, lonely mans who I metaphorically hurl against the wall like a sticky hand when I need to feel something.
This version of Steven will likely never have any kind of full ass fic or comic made about him. Despite that, I do enjoy sharing some art and fun character lore for him from time to time. So, I might as well finally give followers like... literally ANY context for him. I've had this ref sheet for a while and just have never gotten around to throwing it on here, LOL.
Ridiculously long dump about my guy under the cut.
Subnote, this was supposed to be a quick post but I can't help myself and wrote you a fucking BOOK under the cut because I love my guy so much UWU
(Content warning I guess for like, extremely vague mentions of Steven/Steven later on.)
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The huge tl;dr of Astra is as follows: he's a version of Steven who exists for SO long that he basically transforms into something of an ancient, lonely god.
He's outlived every single person he once knew as a child, and so as a result is starved for affection. At the same time, being vulnerable is the absolute scariest thing for him and he's really shit at navigating relationships, F.
The guy is THE most powerful living creature in his entire universe by the end, and yet remains a soft-spoken, (generally) benevolent soul. He dedicates himself to acting as caretaker for the vast, populous world he exists within, and to maintain the continuing legacy of Gemkind. A big discovery that occurs in this AU is that Gems are in fact susceptible to entropy over the span of millions of years and will eventually fall "inert," (but not him because of weird hybrid biology stuff he honestly sees as more of a curse than a blessing) so a huge plotline early on in Astra's lifespan is trying to either find a "cure" for this issue or to develop a means by which new generations of Gems can be created without the reinstatement of Kindergartens so Gemkind doesn't overtly go extinct.
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But, to start... this Steven diverges off a point in canon- this is the timeline where he actually takes up the Diamonds on their offer of the throne in the movie, believing he may have a better chance of heralding true societal change working from the INSIDE rather than stepping away. Because he pours himself so thoroughly into his role on Homeworld and his mind is continuously occupied by this purpose, he never experiences the events SU: Future, nor does he develop his "pink mode" (yet...) or corrupt at all.
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However, he's also so engrossed in his work that he's... kind of a shit boyfriend to Connie as years go on. (In that he's not terribly attentive... always super busy... their visits are often cut short, or few and far between.) Their relationship never really goes anywhere as a result, though Connie wants it to. To be fair so does Steven, but he's so scared that everything he's worked so hard to organize and set up in this new era will fall apart if he steps aside from his role for even a moment that he can't allow himself to follow that want.
At some point here he learns he can poof through a complete freak accident, and that's where things really begin to change in this timeline.
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It takes a good few months for him to reform, but once he does he's back at it with all his work on Homeworld pretty quick.
The thing is... he doesn't have an innate physical need to eat or drink or sleep anymore, because he now consists of entirely hard light. It mimics human biology to an insane degree, so he COULD do all those things, but he doesn't need them to persist. So... he kinda takes this as an excuse to cut those activities out of his schedule entirely so he can spend more time focused on his duties as a diamond.
Connie is NOT a fan of this, and this leads to some debate and tension within their relationship. That being said, they remain an item...
Up until out of nowhere, Connie dies in an accident on Earth while Steven is off planet in a place where he doesn't have any contact with them for a few days. By the time the Gems are able to get in touch with him, it's far too late to resurrect her.
The kicker? In the autopsy it's discovered that she was a few weeks pregnant when she died.
Steven is emotionally gutted by this... and the thought of what could have been... and poofs.
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The guy is understandably destroyed when he comes back in his next form, and his form reflects that- his gem flips as a sort of metaphorical severing from his own humanity.
He spends a long while in a deep depression at the loss of his childhood sweetheart... at the loss of any potential for (as far as he sees) a "normal" human life. There's a part of him that resents the choices he's made to end up in this present, but like, there's still work to be done.
And as the years move on, a LOT of that work is mitigating the growing relations (for better or for worse) between Gems and humans as humanity stretches their legs and reaches out into the stars. Humans kinda get... really aggressive in their expansion though, and quite territorial, and it leads towards some inevitable conflict between them and Gemkind. This time, with them more at fault. Things get so spicy that some groups of humans and Gems go to war.
Steven tries to mitigate one of these situations at the front lines- and gets poofed by a disgruntled Gem, speared straight through the back because she (kinda wrongly) assumed he would take the humans' side due to his ancestral ties to them.
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When he reforms this time, he is glowing a perpetual pink. The Gems don't really know what to make of this, but he seems to be in perfectly fine health otherwise, so they assume it's just a normal aspect of this new neutral form.
And while this isn't something Steven has context to figure out until like... billions of years later, what's actually happened is that he's entered a permanent pink mode, pretty much. Guy's just got that much bottled up, unaddressed trauma.
He spends a long time in this form, and over all these thousands of years oversees the slow return to peace between Gems and humans... their marriage as a space age federation... and their deeper exploration of the galaxy. Beyond their home solar systems exist a bounty of alien species they've yet to meet... some friendly, some less so. There's definitely some conflict that crops up amidst the local galactic neighborhood when Gems and humans show up on the playing field here, lol.
But all-in-all, Steven develops a fairly peaceful and predictable routine during this reformation- living more like a Gem than ever before. He's still got the Crystal Gems at his side through all of this, and they are some of his greatest confidants.
And then... without any warning... Gems begin to go inert. Amethyst is among them.
Some of them simply stop reforming after they poof... especially those who were older Gems, or who have been cracked before. Steven and the other Diamonds using their powers together are able to "fix" this at first and "jumpstart" their reformation, but it's just a bandaid of a fix- these Gems will fall inert again pretty soon. And the longer they persist without poofing from alternate causes, the more unstable their form, power, and memory becomes. (Think of this as Gem dementia at its late stages,,, oof.)
The bottom line? Just like organics, Gems aren't immune to the forces of entropy. Sooner or later, their gemstones will decay from the inside out. Stubborn to find a way to save the ones he loves as he watches them slowly deteriorate all around him, Steven dedicates himself to trying to find a cure. But deep down, a part of him recognizes the futility of this. What he believes Gemkind actually needs to do is to develop a means of rebooting Gem incubation that doesn't destroy planets, so they can rebuild their quickly dwindling population and keep their legacy alive.
The big problem with this is that Gems take a SHIT load of energy and resources to properly incubate, so that puzzle will take a long ass time to sort out. There's kinda a lot of chaos that happens during this time. The reality of their own blunt mortality freaks out a bunch of Gems, and Steven has to do damage control with the heads of state for a lot of other alien species.
In the interim, all the Crystal Gems and some of the Diamonds (White is still in the picture, though) end up falling inert. Pearl is the last of the CGs to do so.
Steven is understandably SUPER gutted about this, and poofs yet again. (Lol notice a theme? Poor mans keeps poofing from friggin' anguish. Help him.)
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After reforming with barely any changes, it's right back to work for this guy. He and the rest of his team of researchers are unable to find any cure for Gems decaying and falling inert, but they do end up making huge leaps and bounds in other kinds of tech. One of these advances allows Steven to finally deep-scan his own gemstone down to the atomic level to check for decay- this was previously a process that was very invasive, and came at the risk of irreparably damaging a Gem, but not anymore.
He expects to find evidence of the same micro decay that's been slowly eating away at the rest of Gemkind within his OWN diamond, but the thing is...
He just... ISN'T decaying at all? Even though the sheer age of this gemstone itself should suggest otherwise? As it turns out though, his existence as a hybridized being makes him kind of... an anomaly. When he first reformed all those thousands of years ago, all the data within his gem- data that would otherwise be susceptible to decay- was translated into genetic material. DNA that's woven entirely out of hard-light... but, DNA that has also been constantly regenerating itself thanks to a combination of all the intricate biochemistry surrounding the human telomere and his healing powers.
In other words, he is incapable of falling inert from natural causes, like micro decay. He's functionally immortal. Unless someone shatters him (or... heaven forbid... he shatters himself) he simply can't die.
Which, all of a sudden, makes his race to save Gemkind from their quickly approaching extinction all the more personal. Because if he FAILS- then he'll be the very last of Gemkind. There will be no one else left in this world who is even remotely like him. (Humanity has mixed and mingled with the galactic locals so much by now that they're very much unrecognizable from what they once were.)
His spirit is very nearly broken by this discovery, and he is severely tempted to throw all his own principles out the window and just sanction the construction of new Kindergartens again, if only to keep the dwindling Gem populations up and birth new generations. Perhaps surprisingly, it's White Diamond- the last Gem left who Steven actually knew since the very beginning- who urges him to reconsider. To not give up on his own morality, to not revert all the miraculous changes he's worked for these long few million years.
The big shift in the tides is when he discovers the means to jump to alternate timelines, and thus the existence of the greater multiverse. This allows him to gather intel and ideas from a far greater spectrum of sources.
And eventually... it's with the aid of many alt versions of himself from other lines across the multiverse that leads to him finding a suitable, eco-friendly solution to his Gem incubation problem. (This is the aspect of this AU I cannot discuss in length for discretion's sake. Use your imagination. Or don't, I don't care.)
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The following two sections, I'll be talking more about the broad thematics than anything else. At this point, know that there are now new batches of Gems being created all the time. Gemkind is no longer at risk of any extinction, but now- like any stable organic species- new Gems are made at the same rate that they fall inert.
So, the BIGGEST thing here with this reformation is that this is overtly where this guy picks up the name "Astra." Why a name change? Well, after White finally went inert, leaving him the last Diamond in existence within this line, it basically just felt... upsetting to him, to continue to go by a name that every person he ever loved used for him. Thus, the new name is overtly a means to distance himself from that past, and from that pain. (It's also a name he chooses while thinking back to a meaningful conversation he had with White, back before she went inert, oOF. I'll probably yell about that at some point in another post.)
So, too, is the lack of any tangible facial features. He HAS a face, but others just can't see it. He subconsciously obscures it from almost everyone's sight as a means of avoiding vulnerability. One might also have noticed by now that this guy's proportions have gotten like, really strange and sorta "stretched out" over time the larger he becomes... and this is intentional, as it's yet another way he's just becoming more inhuman in form, yet another way he's internally separating himself from those humble human origins of his.
But here's the thing, though.
Deep, deep down, to be human and to live a simple human life is basically all he's ever craved. It's everything he feels he's lost forever, with the death of his Connie. And instead, he's kinda stuck in a hellish sunk cost fallacy of his own making, acting as eternal caretaker for this world that- no matter what he does to try and make it a better place- will never quite be PERFECT. Thus, in his mind, even though he's literally fixed Gemkind's BIGGEST problem, he can't Stop. He can't Rest. He simply can't allow himself himself to lay down and Sink Away into the unknown.
And even if he could allow himself to do so, he is so, so scared of walking that path alone.
If he's going to die... he wants that end to be at a lover's side.
How, though, is someone who's basically a god supposed to find anyone in this multiverse with experiences they can remotely relate to?
Well... ultimately, Astra finds that it's far, far easier to build up a close relationship with varying versions of himself than anyone else. He's... kinda trash at it, though. This guy has so much bottled up Gunk in his head and is so starved for any form of affection that he has a habit of throwing WAY too much of himself into the relationships he engages in, and expecting that same level of commitment in return. There's one relationship with an alt Steven he's in for a while that ends up pretty unhealthily co-dependent before it fizzles out, and then another where he assumes the individual is committing to this partnership for the long run, but then no... actually Astra was always pouring more into this dynamic than he was receiving in return.
This second relationship, when it ends, is pretty devastating to him- since it was one that lasted for like, a LONG ass time. Unimaginably long. We're talking billions of years, here.
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Uh-oh! And now he's even more distanced from other people. Folks can't even parse his actual chosen name at this point- except he isn't really consciously aware of this for a while?? It's yet another silent cry for help, yet another internal defense mechanism specially intended to keep others from truly getting to know him. Because every time he does... stars. No matter what he does, he keeps getting hurt. Almost everyone he knows and loves is torn from his life eventually... if not by death, then by some form of tragedy... and he's just so, so tired.
He wants literally ANYTHING to change in his life. He craves some new form of purpose. He craves the attention of someone who might love him as passionately as he loves them.
For a while, he almost believes he's found that- in yet another close relationship he forges with an alt version of himself- but while this other Steven does care for him immensely, it's only as a friend. Which kinda kills Astra, because he's like, lost in the sauce levels of In Love with this guy. There's a LOOOOOOT of story I have here with this, oh my god. If I am thinking about this AU I am usually thinking about this Old Man Yaoi. The great bulk of it is very NSFW themed though, so y'all getting the cliff notes.
The MOST important thing to know though, is that Astra both makes intense leaps and strides in once again allowing himself to be vulnerable with this man, and ALSO kinda intensely fucks their whole mutually agreed situationship up. It's messy. I am crying and wailing at these two old dumbasses. Jesus fucking christ.
But then, it's in the aftermath of this whole deal that an individual named Orion comes into the picture.
Orion quite literally falls into Astra's world by complete accident, but it's a very lucky accident- because she is a diamond hybrid version of Connie from another universe who- beyond a few differences- has a strikingly similar history to his. The big difference, though? She never found a means to create new Gems without Kindergartens, so she was the last of just a few thousand Gems who existed in her entire line. Part of a deeply endangered species.
This version of Connie arrives in some very deep mental turmoil, and so Astra does his best to give them a stable home and a place to heal. And while a past version of him might've been tempted to throw way too much of himself into the slow building rapport they have, he's blessedly Learned a thing or two from the past few major relationship experiences he's had... and chooses to like, ease up. Just offer himself as a friend first and foremost, should they care for one. Man learns restraint, lol.
And it's a damn GOOD thing that he does, because out of the genuine friendship they foster, Orion is the one who ultimately falls in love with him first. The relationship that's established here is one that's balanced, a true partnership where they simply make each other better people. It's through Orion's encouragement that Astra eventually reconnects and makes up with that last person he had an intense relationship with, even.
In time, Astra truly grows to thrive with Orion in his life. He becomes a far more open, vulnerable person, someone who feels safe to truly exist as who he is, to bare every complicated, battered facet of his past to those he trusts. While he may have taken the LONG road to get here, he too heals. And as a result...
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One day, Astra simply stops glowing entirely. Shrinks down to more reasonable proportions. He stops hovering around on automatic, stops subconsciously scrubbing the memory of his face or name from people's minds. He stops denying his truest, deepest self- the reality that he was born an organic being, and raised as a human.
The burred reality that all he's ever truly wanted since the day his first lover died is to be a father.
To live a quiet, simple life with the people he loves.
For so long it was a mirage of a future he thought he'd never chase down, but for how much he made all the wrong choices the first time around, now he has a second chance.
And so in my brain, that's exactly what happens. Astra and Orion start a family together and continue to act as guardians over this universe for many years to come, until- after they are satisfied with the long life they've lived together, and their children have moved on to start forging their own paths- they eventually pass Beyond at their own will in each other's arms, ending their impossibly long godhood at peace.
I really don't know how to end this post lmafo, so I will simply say: if you somehow read all of this, holy shit you are so brave. Thank you for engaging with my insane ramblings. Have a nice day LOL FUIHSNUFSJG
This man haunts my brain so much I missed two off ramp turns on the highway the other day while thinking about him. Help me.
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rootspiral · 6 hours ago
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Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 9 part 2
(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][+1] ep5 [1][2][3][4][5] ep6 [1][2][3] ep7 [1][2][3][4][5][6] ep8 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9] ep9 [1][2])
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I'm glad nicky came up with a cool new tune because according to period movies and shows greensleeves is the only song anyone ever knew
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look at that meek little smile, ughhhh. nicky is like two days old and this asshole has already figured out he's the perfect prop for her murder sprees. and these poor women are calling her sister and are willing to help too.
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the spell is te accipimus in circulum, we accept you in the circle, and yes that makes me cry a little. we accept you in our community. and the spell is yellow air magic, which sounds like the most empathic kind if Lilia is any indication.
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that's interesting, you can't really tell that well from screencaps but go rewatch the scene, this witch is making mushrooms grow with yellow magic instead of green?? is it just a spell (she is holding a book) or have I been getting it all wrong and color has nothing to do with the type of magic one has?
or maybe??? the color depends on the coven you're in?? the salemites all had blue magic for example. and now that I think about it the stone circle is a protection spell but it's not red/orange.
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the meaning of this scene is so glaring dear lord. agatha was never going to give these women a chance to prove that yes, there are people out there who could love and help and accept her. she has shut herself up to that possibility a long time ago.
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and she stole the soup too. awful.
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I've seen all the different theories about nicky needing to feed on witches too, or nicky needing soul sacrifices to survive because he's the son of death etc. we don't have enough evidence to prove anything yet, but personally I headcanon nicky as a totally normal kid, that makes this story even more tragic.
and aww that baby suckling on the little pudgy fist
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nicky doesn't look that happy about what he's been asked to do, does he?
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we establish that nicky was sickly (maybe he was born with some internal defect that rio temporarily patched up?) we also see him steal the bell agatha will use for her Road scam in the future.
and we meet yet another witch being kind and wanting to help.
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agatha: I love this six year old so much I'm gonna make him accessory to murder
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dO yOU ShaME YouR MOtHER
and the big fake gasp too. as usual this bitch has conned a whole community
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like, she's convinced herself that other witches are bad and are after her WHILE relying on witches's good hearts to con and kill them. what sort of mental gymnastics???
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color goes from yellow to purple. nicky waits outside while his mom commits murder, it's not a good look on agatha. completely fucked up, actually.
(I'm terrified that the goat will end up being an agent of mephisto or something idiotic like that, lemme tell you. I hope they're just keeping it for milk and company.)
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and here's the million dollar question. nicky has seen his mom kill literally since he was born, and now he's old enough to start realizing what that means.
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oooh I know that look, that's agatha when she's put on the spot. she avoids his gaze, she can't be sincere with him.
and of course she's teaching herself spells from a book. nerrrrrrd
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nicky, bless his soul, appears to give it a good thought and then offers a practical suggestion. I guess he wouldn't mind to have a roof on his head and some friends too.
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GREAT acting from kathryn here. the quick OH SHIT face followed by the super final NO, with her jaw so rigid. in typical agatha fashion, when she's upset she becomes avoidant.
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this is evanora's legacy. despite agatha's immense love for nicky, she is passing all that pain down and inflicting it on him.
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remember when she called billy a survivor? this is the greatest asset in her opinion, the one she wants to teach her son. the truth is, she is angry at witches because she is scared of them, she's scared of being targeted again. but look at that kid's dark circles, I can't believe she's making him sleep in the woods, sick as he is!
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really really fantastic subtlety. agatha wants to sound wise and strong, but she looks scared, uncertain, guilty.
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see how nicky looks at agatha while he sings? he's checking to see if she's noticing, because his mom likes music and likes his voice. he's afraid he has upset her and wants to make her smile. he tried to reason with her, and now he tries to soothe her. this is what happens when you have an immature parent, a child will want to help, they will try to fix things. they'll end up parenting their parent, and it should always be the other way round.
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agatha takes the bait. she's relieved that the conversation has moved to a safer subject. but oh, this script is so good. this is a mostly innocent, mostly sweet remark, but with a possessive undertone. don't forget that you are mine, she says.
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and still, the love is real. even in a fucked up situation like this, these moment of happiness are precious and genuine and will linger on. look at how adoringly nicky looks at his mom, she's literally the sun and center of his small world, and that's how agatha likes it: she created nicky because she needed someone who could be hers without any baggage or consequences. but it turns out that raising a child is not a cheat code for love, it's one of the most difficult, most significant and impactful decisions a human can make.
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sobbingscripter · 1 day ago
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DAY 11: Eleven Pipers Piping
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☃️A Star Is Born☃️
Tags: [mlw][mdni][analingus][ass play][oral (f receiving)][friends to lovers]
❄️☃️❄️
"You know, I always thought 'A Star is Born' was about the birthing of Christ."
Your voice breaks the quiet peace between the two of you, snow falling just outside your apartment window and the low hum of the space heater is the only sound other than the faint sound of Christmas carols playing from the apartment next door.
It's quiet other than that. The soft symphony of your quiet breaths taken in tandem as you rest beside him, backs against the sofa and your eyes absentmindedly watching one of those generic Christmas movies.
A woman travels to a new city, uptight and whatnot, meets a carefree guy who teaches her how to love.
But that peaceful reverie is broken when you speak.
The laughter tumbles from Jason's lips like a waterfall, piggy snorts and wheezes slipping out in the same breath, a delightful cadence and you watch as the dimples in his cheeks deepen and the corners of his eyes crease. He's still got a few bruises on him, a plaster over his nose and a cut on his eyebrow and his bottom lip.
"How the fuck did you—" He can barely speak before he snorts with laughter, watching as you shift in your position, visibly getting ready to defend yourself.
"Because like... The title sounds... Biblical, you know?" You answer and Jason shakes his head, that snowy streak in his hair a complete contrast to the inkiness of his hair, undertoned by a faint red.
"No, no I do not know." He snickers.
"Like... You know how the wise men followed the star? And the star seemed to like... Appear out of nowhere, or at least, it wasn't as bright? And like, I was like, 'oh, the star that the wise men followed to get to like, the miracle baby'."
Jason stares at you, a dark brow raised and arched as he listens to you ramble, motioning with your hands. Manicured fingers, that enunciate each of your points and those rosy lips, forming words that he has no intention of storing in the 1 megabyte memory card that is his brain.
"Jason." You snap your fingers in front of his face. "Are you even listening to me?"
"No I'm not." He hums. "You know, when you talk and laugh a lot, your eyes crease in the corners?"
Jason leans forward. "It's really sexy."
"...fuck—..shit.. don't stop..."
You feel like the bottom of the barrel. Allowing yourself to be bent over your coffee table, just because someone said your smile lines were sexy.
But you don't dwell too much on it because Jason's nose is nuzzling against your slick entrance as his tongue circles your clit. His strong, scarred hands spread your ass cheeks apart, and he spits down the cleft, watching the way your puckered hole spasms at the unusual sensation.
And Jason groans, pressing a thumb against the hole and slowly tracing it, just as he sucks your clit into his mouth, soft, pursed lips pressing adoring kisses to your needy pussy.
"Fuck, you taste so good."
Jason breathes out, long lashes fluttering as he continues to tease your ass, feeling the slow pulses and he groans, tongue diving between your slippery folds.
It's stupidly good, and you can barely focus on the drool that drips down your plump bottom lip in a thin glob, your mind too fucked out to realise it.
You're pushing yourself against Jason's face, your back arched and your hips wriggling because you just need something to soothe that little burning feeling in your gut. Something to fill up your empty cunt, that seems to ooze with slick, clenching around nothing.
Jason shifts, kicking your legs further apart and slowly, you feel your hole welcome something so.... Warm. And wet. And slippery.
Jason fucks you with his tongue, skilled fingers teasing your asshole while the other hand flicks across your clit, and he groans as you spasm on his tongue, slick sputtering out of you as he keeps tonguefucking you through your orgasm.
When Jason's tongue curls against your perineum, dragging the wet muscle slowly along your fluttering hole, you gasp. Nails digging into the sofa and your cheek pressed against the backrest and he hums, a laugh slipping past his lips.
"Maybe we should switch positions."
Jason mutters almost thoughtfully, broad hands massaging the globes of your ass, the fat of your hips and your thighs. And he presses a kiss to the small of your back.
His hands are rough but they're so gentle against your hands, as he guides you carefully, your knees pressing against the cushion of the sofa.
"Come on, pretty," Jason hums quietly, resting back on the other sofa, his broad body dwarfing the furniture.
"Pop a squat on Daddy's face."
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just-dreaming-marvel · 13 hours ago
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Love That Burns ~ Ending 2 ~ 45
LOVE THAT BURNS MASTERLIST
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< previous chapter
Word Count: 3,850ish
Summary: On the road, your group finds a family in need of help.
Warning(s): lots of movie dialogue, canon violence, injuries, character death(s)
Reminder: I DO NOT do taglists. Please don’t ask. Please follow and interact! I appreciate any reblogs, likes, comments, and asks!
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The four of you found yourselves back on the road soon after the wedding ceremony. Things seemed lighter in a way. Laura and Charles sat in back while Logan drove and you sat beside him. Logan kept one hand on the wheel while his other kept a firm hold on yours. He didn’t want to let you go before your marriage was official, but now he really didn’t want to. 
Charles was drifting in and out of sleep as Laura stared out the window with her sunglasses, locking and unlocking the door.
“Knock it off,” Logan said, voice gruff. Laura made no move to stop. “I said, knock it off!”
“She’s a child, Logan,” Charles said. “And, point of face, she’s your—“
“How long has it been since you took your meds?” Charles exhaled, annoyed. “Tell me, how long has it been?”
“I don’t know!”
Logan scoffed. “You saw what happened yesterday. If that shit had gone on any longer, everything in that casino—“
“I did what I had to do to save Laura and Y/N.”
“What?” You questioned, turning to look back at Charles.
“I knew you wouldn’t get to my meds and I kept you from doing so. You wouldn’t have been able to take on all those men while protecting Laura and I.”
“You had a fucking seizure on purpose?!” Logan exclaimed, clearly furious.
“I guess you prefer me pharmaceutically castrated, rambling on like a lunatic. So much easier for you.”
“Easier? There is nothing easy about you, Charles, nothing!”
“Yes, yes, please be like the rest of the world, blaming someone else for your boring shit.”
“I know, Pop, I’m such a giant disappointment.”
“What? Logan, you’re not a disappointment,” you tried to interject. 
“You honestly derive no sense of purpose from what we’re doing?” Charles continued.
“Okay, what are we doing?” Logan questioned. “Hmm?”
“There is a young mutant sitting in our car.”
“Yeah, I see that.”
“And where we’re taking her, there are others. Does that mean nothing to you?”
“Yeah, means nothing to me. Especially since Nurse Gabriela made all that Eden shit up with fucking comic books.”
“What are you talking about?”
Logan let go of your hand and opened the center consul. He pulled out a bottle, handing it to you. “Give those to him, will you?”
“Logan,” you tried.
“Give ‘em to him.”
You sighed, opening up the bottle and taking two pills out. You turned back and handed them to Charles, giving him a sympathetic smile. Charles took them and tossed them into his mouth before getting a drink.
“I wanna see it,” Logan said, looking at Charles.
Charles made a noise as he opened his mouth and stuck his tough out for Logan to see. Logan took the bottle from you, threw it into the consul, and then slammed it shut. You sighed, so much for the happiness that the small wedding brought. Logan glanced over at you as you stared out the window. He took your hand and brought it up to his lips for a kiss.
“Sorry,” Logan muttered. “On edge.”
“Clearly,” you replied, turning to face him. “Can you try not to be mad at anyone in this car? The rest of the world, sure, but those in this truck are off limits. Got it?” 
“Only for you.” He kissed the back of your hand again.
“Whipped,” Charles muttered.
“Have something to tell the class Professor?”
“Nothing.”
Your group fell into a calm silence for a few moments until one of the auto-semi-trucks moved too close to your truck.
“Motherfucking auto-trucks!” Logan exclaimed.
“Language, Logan,” scolded Charles. “And you’re screaming at a machine.”
“Oh, what? She can gut a man with her feet, she can’t hear a few naughty words, huh?”
“She can learn to be better.”
“You mean, better than me?”
“I’m sure that’s not—“
“Actually, yes,” Charles interrupted you. 
You knew Charles wasn’t totally in his right mind, but you wished he could fully realize how much his words affected Logan. 
“And, by the way,” continued Charles, “Laura’s foot claws are the obvious result of her gender, you know.”
“Is that a fact?” Logan asked.
“In a pride of lions, the female is both hunter and caregiver.”
“Good to know.”
“She uses her front claws for hunting and the back claws defensively.”
“Oh, yeah?” Logan’s sarcasm was clear.
“Thus, ensuring their survival.”
Laura watched this—and every— interaction with curiosity and caution. It was clear to her that her comics were right about somethings. One being that the Wolverine was tough and hostile, but had a soft side for those he cared about. Especially for you. Though the comics Nurse Gabriela had shown her did not do the love you two shared any justice, both the good and the bad. Laura could tell that Logan didn’t know how exactly to deal with Laura and who she was, but she could tell that the hostility was dying, though extreme slow. Laura knew that was thanks to you. As she continued to watch and listen, you looked back to check on her. You shot her a soft smile. Laura wanted to give you one in return, but she really didn’t know how, so she opted for a nod and to turn back to the window.
Just then, an auto-truck honked and began to move over to the lane that your truck was in without even waiting. Logan was forced to swerve quickly, driving into oncoming traffic. Laura held onto Charles trying to keep him steady while you gripped the handle near your door and the middle consul. Logan maneuvered through the oncoming traffic until there was a clearing and he could turn around, coming to a harsh stop. He looked around, noticing that everyone was clearly shaken up.
As the four of you tried to calm down, you watched as a truck pulling a horse trailer stopped across the road. The horse trailer had been knocked open in the incident, with the horses running out. A young man and his parents got out of the truck, rushing to get the horses off the road.
“We should help them,” Charles suggested.
“No, we have to keep going,” Logan retorted. “Someone will come along.”
“Someone has come along.”
Logan looked your way, wanting to know your thoughts.
“I think it would do us some good to help someone else right now,” you told him.
With a sigh, Logan drove the truck across the lanes of traffic and parked it in front of the other truck. Charles rolled down the window and closed his eyes as you and Logan exited the truck. You watched as the horses all came back over and lined up in the trailer. Logan looked back over at Charles with a angry look. You caught it, slipping your hand into Logan’s and giving it a light squeeze. Laura slipped out of the car and stood a bit behind you two.
“Hey, uh, you need a hand?” Logan asked.
“Yeah,” the woman replied. “Our truck is stuck. After we get the horses in, we could really use some help getting it out.”
Once the horses were in the trailer, the woman got into the driver’s seat and turned on the truck to help reverse it. Logan and her husband got in front to push it while the son was helping from the side. Once they were all set, they started moving the truck back.
“Ah, good,” the husband patted the front as soon as the truck had moved to a good spot, “got it. Come on, let’s get home.”
“Laura! Y/N!” Logan called. The two of you were standing near the trailer, Laura looking at the horses.
“Thank you so much for your help,” the woman said. “I’m Kathryn.” She reached out her hand.
Logan shook it. “James.”
“This is my son, Nate.”
“Hi,” Nate said.
“Hey,” Logan responded.
“Is that your wife and daughter?” Kathryn asked.
“Uh, yeah, thats, uh—“
“I’m Y/N,” you walked up to Kathryn, “his wife. That’s our daughter Laura.”
“Yeah, and that’s my dad, Chuck,” Logan pointed to Charles in the truck, who waved. “Come on, Laura, let’s go.”
“Well, can we show our appreciation and treat the four of you to a decent meal?” Kathryn wondered. “We don’t live far from here.”
“Uh, no, thanks.”
“That would be lovely!” Charles exclaimed. 
You stifled a giggle at the look Logan shot Charles. You walked over to Logan and took his hand. “As long as we aren’t a bother,” you told Kathryn.
“Of course not,” she said. “Just follow us home.”
~~~
“I don’t like this,” Logan grumbled as the table was being set. “We need to keep moving.”
“Logan, it’s just one night,” you told him. “No one would suspect us to stop somewhere like this.”
“Still.”
“Everybody, have a seat,” Kathryn said. 
“James, why don’t you sit at the end of the table?” Will, Kathryn’s husband, suggested.
Will sat on one end while Logan took the opposite seat. Kathryn and Nate took one of the longer sides, while Charles, Laura, and you took the other.
“You wanna say grace?” Kathryn asked. “Say grace, baby.”
“Uh, thank you, God, for this food,” Nate said, “and for our new friends, the Howletts.
“Mmm. They came to our aid. Amen.”
“Amen,” you joined in with the rest in saying it.
Everyone began eating. Logan noticed quickly that Laura was stuffing the food into her mouth using her hands. He reached over and handed her, her fork. The bowl of corn got passed to her and she quickly began scooping. Logan took the bowl away before she could take it all. You bit your lip as you noticed how the others were watching you all. 
“Oh, there’s plenty more if she wants,” Kathryn offered. 
“She’s fine,” Logan said. “Thank you.”
“This is delicious,” Charles said.
“Oh, thank you,” Kathryn responded.
“It’s so good.”
“Where are you all headed?” Will asked.
“Uh, Oregon,” Logan said at the same time that Charles said, “South Dakota.”
“Well, Oregon and then South Dakota,” Charles corrected.
“Vacation?” Kathryn wondered.
“Uh, yes. Uh, long overdue. We’re city folk. Always wanted to take a road trip, see the country. And meet the people in it.”
“Well that sounds lovely. Been trying to get Will here to take a vacation for years now.”
“If we go traipsing all over the country, who’s gonna take care of this place?” Will retorted.
“Exactly. I say, let it go.”
“And live off what?”
“The Lord will provide.”
“I”m still waiting for the Lord to provide me with a new thresher.”
“All the same, I’d love to travel someday.”
“And I bet, you will,” Charles told her.
“I could drop out of school,” Nate offered.
“Okay, let’s not go that far,” Kathryn said. 
“I mean, I’ll do it.”
“No, no.”
“Why not? You wanna travel, I wanna travel.”
“Son, son.”
“That sounds good to you, right?” Will asked.
“It’s the perfect plan,” said Nate.
“Why oddly you want to do that, Nate?” Charles wondered.
“Careful,” Logan spoke up, “you’re speaking to a man who ran a school for a lot of years. Right, Charles?”
“Really?” Will asked.
“Yes, it was a… it was a special needs school,” Charles said.
You tried not laugh at his description.
“Uh-huh. That’s a good description,” Logan smirked.
“He was there, too,” Charles pointed at Logan. “In fact, these two both were.”
“Yeah, I got kicked out a few times.”
“Some of them were by choice,” you spoke up, teasing him.
“I wish I could say you were a good pupil, but the words would choke me,” Charles said.
Everyone laughed, including Logan.
“Not that Y/N was much better,” Charles added.
“Wait, what?” You questioned.
“When Y/N first arrived at the school, she hid and refused to participate. Took me years to get her to do anything.”
“Hey, woah. Not years. Maybe one.”
“Whatever.”
The laughter and chatter continued until everyone was full. Logan stood up.
“Ma’am, I can’t thank you enough for this,” he said. “Uh, it was great. But we have a long drive ahead of us, so—“
“But you need to rest, don’t you?” Kathryn questioned.
“Yeah, we’ll find a motel somewhere.”
“The nearest one is two hours from here and it’s not even that nice,” Will said. 
“We have a perfectly fine room upstairs for your father and your daughter if you don’t mind you and your wife sleeping in the living room on the convertible,” Kathryn offered.
“Kathryn, it’s very, very nice of you, but we really should go.”
“We can leave early in the morning,” Charles said. “Break of dawn, as it were.”
Logan looked at you, hoping that you’d side with him. You weren’t going to though. It was nice to interact with others and seem normal for a while.
“Okay,” Logan sighed, “why don’t we wash up, Pop?”
Logan pushed Charles away to the bathroom.
“Would you two like some dessert?” Kathryn offered.
“If it’s not too much trouble,” you replied.
“Of course not.”
“You all have been really kind to my family. Thank you.”
The water coming from the sink suddenly cut in and out. 
“Oh, shit!” Will exclaimed.
“What’s going on?” Logan asked, stepping out of the bathroom.
“Nate, go fill up the tub before we lose pressure.”
“They shut if off again,” Kathryn said.
“They are just not going to let this thing go.”
“Well, you might as well handle it now.”
“It can wait till the morning. We just had rain last night.”
“We got four houseguests and a sink full of dishes.”
“Alright, alright.” Will turned to talk to Logan. “The pump station that supplies us is a mile and a half from here. Sometimes it gets itself shut off.”
“By assholes,” Nate added.
“My son is happy to go with you,” Charles offered.
“No, no, no, that’s fine,” Will said as Logan gave Charles a look of unbelief. “The men that do this, sometimes they can be—“
“I can go,” Nate said.
“No,” Kathryn said, “you’ve got homework.”
“Alright, I’ll go,” Logan said. “Just, uh, let me get my dad settled.” 
He walked over to Charles and picked him up. Your heart broke as you could hear the strain in Logan’s breathing. You took Laura’s hand and followed Logan and Charles up the stairs to the open bedroom. Laura saw Nate in his room and opted to follow him.
“Behave,” you whispered to her with a smile before letting her go. 
You peeked into the room, watching Logan get Charles tucked in. He held up a remote.
“Want TV?” Logan asked. “There’s TV here.”
“I’m fine,” Charles breathed out.
“Okay. Get some rest.”
“You know, Logan… this is what life looks like. A home, people who love each other. Safe place. You should take a moment and feel it. It’s been too long since you’ve had that.”
“Yeah It’s great.” You stepped back as Logan came to the door.
“Logan. Logan! You still have time.”
“Charles, the world is not the same as it was. We’re taking a risk hanging around here, you know that. And where we’re going, Eden… it doesn’t exist. Her nurse got it from a comic book. You understand? It’s not real.”
“It is for Laura… It is for Laura.”
“Get some rest.”
Logan walked out of the room, completely shutting the door, to find you there.
“What are we doing, Logan?” You asked quietly. “If you don’t believe that Eden is real, then where are we taking Laura? What are your plans with her?”
Logan sighed, coming up to you and placing his hands on your arms. He ran his hands down until he could hold your hands. “I… I’m trying here.”
“Try harder… for Laura, for Charles… for me. You need to decide if you believe in it and if you’re willing to trust that Eden will be a safe place for your daughter.”
“Do you believe in it?”
“I hope it’s real. For her sake.”
“Then I’ll try a little harder, okay?” You nodded, leaning into Logan. His hands dropped yours to wrap you in a hug. “I won’t be long.”
“Be safe.”
The two of you met for a brief kiss. You walked Logan down the stairs and watched as he and Will headed out to the fields. You saw Kathryn in living room, reading the pull-out bed. 
“Thank you, again,” you told her.
“Of course,” she replied. “It seems like you all have had a long journey and need some good rest.”
“Yeah,” you nodded.
“The bed’s all ready. Sleep well.” 
Then Kathryn walked away. You crawled onto the bed and curled up, thinking of Logan. You heard footsteps just as you were about to fall asleep, the weight was familiar. Your back was facing towards the slow, on coming footsteps.
“Logan?” You whispered quietly, only to receive no verbal response. 
A hand fell to your back, moving until it was above your beating heart.
“Logan, what are you—“
Quickly, the hand formed a fist and three metal claws entered your heart. The darkness came instantly.
~~~
When Logan and Will arrived back at the house, Logan went to the truck to try to calm down his coughing. A gunshot and screams had his head snapping in the direction of the house. Logan raced inside the best he could with his limp. Will was at the bottom of the stairs, claw marks through his chest. Logan looked up to see a copy of him—younger and less scarred—carrying a screaming and bound Laura down the stairs. Logan froze, only able to pant and stare as the copy of him walked past him, Laura still screaming.
“Charles!” Logan shouted up the stairs. “Y/N! Charles! Y/N!” 
He used the railing to get him up the stairs faster. At the top of the stairs, he found Kathryn dead with Nate at the entrance of Charles’ room. He froze for a moment upon seeing Charles bloody and barely breathing in bed. Blood was running out of Charles’ mouth as he shakily reached for Logan. 
When Logan finally broke out from his trance, he rushed over and used some of the bedding to pack Charles’ wound. He maneuvered Charles’ hands to be over the bedding.
“Hold this,” Logan whispered, fear coursing through his veins. “It wasn’t me. It wasn’t me.”
Logan picked Charles up carefully, still scanning the house for any sign of you. Charles let out a moan as he struggled to keep conscious.
“Just hold on, Charles,” Logan said.
Logan went out the side door and rushed Charles over to the truck, placing him in the bed.
“I’ll be back,” Logan promised, before going back inside. “Y/N! Y/N!”
Suddenly, his nose got whiff of a familiar scent. Your blood. He rushed for the living room, where the pull out bed was out. There was a large bloody stain on it, but no you. There was no sign of your fire or your smoke or your ashes. Logan’s heart hammered in his chest as he continued to find no sign of you in the house. Logan stammered out of the house to hear more screaming and gunshots. He saw his duplicate self killing the men who turned off the water. There was a military grade truck past his duplicate. Logan noticed Laura on the ground but when he his moved, his breath caught in his throat. 
They had you in a glass box, like Snow White or a doll. There was blood on you and Logan could tell from where he was standing that you weren’t breathing.
“Charles!” Logan exclaimed quietly. He went back over and pressed on the wounds. “Hold this down, right now, tight!”
“Save them,” Charles whispered. “I’m… sorry…”
“What?”
“Go…” Then Charles heart stopped.
“No.” 
Rage grew inside Logan. How dare they create a duplicate version of him and have him kill you and Charles? He had to get to you before they did anything. Suddenly, the military truck blew up, throwing the glass case you were in forward, crashing next to Laura. The glass broke. Logan needed to move fast. He knew that if you went up in flames and your ashes were separated, there would be no coming back for you. He wouldn’t be able to continue on the rest of his short life without you.
Logan snuck up on his duplicate as the duplicate marched towards you and Laura. With each grunt, he plunged his claws into the duplicate. But his copy made no move to fight back, just walking backwards with each hit. Logan plunged both sets of claws into the copy.
“What the hell are you?” He grunted.
The duplicate stabbed Logan in the shoulder and tossed him over to the ground. Logan shielded himself with his claws before the duplicate could do it again. Every muscle and bone was straining with Logan, but he couldn’t stop. Not when you weren’t safe. Logan jumped back up and continued fighting, but the duplicate was better, stronger. The copy kept making hits, causing Logan to yell out in pain. 
Eventually, the duplicate had Logan pinned against a large tractor tire. Before it could make the final kill, Will’s truck rammed into the duplicate, pinning it against the fence. Will stumbled out of the truck with his gun, shooting into the duplicate multiple times. Once Will believed the duplicate to be dead, he turned his gun on Logan, but couldn’t do anything before he fell to the ground, dead. 
Laura’s shrieking continued as she laid bound beside your dead body. Logan stumbled over to the two of you, bloody and bruised. He knew that you needed to get someplace safe, but he also knew that you would never forgive him for leaving Laura. He grabbed Laura and carried her over to the truck, placing her into the seat next to his before turning to get you.
As he knelt beside you to pick you up, the tears fell. The three punctures over your heart was enough to tell him that his copy had done this to you. He groaned as he picked you up and cradled you against him.
“It wasn’t me,” he whispered, like him saying that would wake you. “It wasn’t me.”
He carried you to the truck and slipped you into the back seat. Laura turned around and saw Charles dead in the bed of the trunk and you dead in the back seat. Her shrieking got worse as she fought against her bindings. Logan turned on the truck and sped off into the fields. Laura thrashed around, trying to free herself. With a shaky hand, Logan released his claws.
“Hold still,” he told her, moving the claws over to her cuffs. “Hold still.”
He cut through the bindings and quickly put away his claws, focusing on driving through the field. Laura crawled into the back seat and placed your head on her lap. Logan glanced at her through the rearview mirror, not missing the tear that slipped down her cheek.
next chapter >
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kalinara · 2 days ago
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So as someone who immensely enjoys disliking Charles Xavier, I have to admit, I was utterly delighted when the X-Men Unlimited Infinity Comic (in Krakoa age, one of the rare times it did not involve Nature Girl murdering people) decided to do what is, essentially, an "It's a Wonderful Life" plot for the guy.
So if even if you've never seen the original movie that the plot comes from, you've undoubtedly seen a parody or homage, (at least if you're American). Sitcoms particularly like to use the idea, but occasionally even serious shows will do it too. A character goes through some shit, is dreadfully unhappy, and is shown what life would be like without him.
Now the thing about X-Men, is that we did see what the world would be like without Charles Xavier in the Age of Apocalypse storyline. And admittedly, it's pretty bad. Scott has long hair. Enough said.
And of course, the gist of this story is that Xavier ends up in the Age of Apocalypse world (or maybe just dreaming about it), and introduces them to the Krakoa concept and gets a big ego boost.
It is what it is. The part that amuses me is what drives Xavier to the point of needing this ego boost. And it is an AMAZING level of petty.
Since there are a lot of scans, I'm going to put them behind a cut. Enjoy! (These are all from X-Men Unlimited Infinity Comic #62, by the way.)
So we start off with Xavier's daily schedule:
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It's a pretty busy itinerary, admittedly. So now, let's see how Xavier's day actually goes.
We actually start off with Xavier waking up, disgruntled, at 6:00 AM. I'm not actually going to show this, because I am not a morning person either and can't make fun of him for it.
Also, he's shirtless, and not being named Max or Erik, I am not into that. Sorry.
But, let's look at the rest.
6:30's resurrection of Rusty Collins
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Xavier was apparently a bit slow, and Hope decided to resurrect the dude without him. That happens. You can hardly blame a teenager for leaping at the chance at grown-up responsibility.
Also, she's a Summers. So it's pretty much inevitable.
--
So then we get the 7:45 meet and greet.
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A small child adores Kitty. Kitty is a little meta here, but not wrong. After all, part of what the Marauders do, at this point, is rescue people.
Now, Xavier looks kind of neutral here, but given that this is part of the litany of disappointment, contextually, one must interpret this to mean he is disappointed.
But here's the thing, Chuck. You're not an "X-Man". You're the dude who sends them out from the shadows. You didn't even publicly admit to being a mutant for decades. And while, yes, you did have some physical issues that made being a field operative impossible, it's not like you're going out on rescue missions NOW.
Sorry, I shouldn't rant. There's more to mock.
--
So how does the 9:15 teaching session go? We don't actually know. Presumably it's not notable. Despite the fact that teaching is the one thing Xavier can claim he actually does.
Instead, we skip ahead to the 11:05 parole hearing:
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I mean, you can't actually be surprised by this. I'm not even sure that Sabretooth is still IN there. But he's busy torturing people, if he is. So no, he's not getting out.
You could let the kids out though. Poor Idie.
--
This bit makes me laugh:
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Got stood up by the guy whose mind you forcibly wiped. You can't be shocked by this, Chuck. That was a fucking dick move and you know it.
(Especially since you decide that Franklin isn't a mutant after all.)
--
How about the X-Corp Review?
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Huh, who'd have thought that multi-millionaire business people would have the business shit handled?
I mean, to be fair to Charles, he does seem to never lack money, so he likely has business sense himself. But meh. I can't blame Warren and Monet for wanting to go off and canoodle or whatever.
--
I admit to some sympathy here, just a bit:
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I've mentioned that I'm not a really a fan of the Arakko focus on Omega mutants, and how that kind of spoils my enjoyment of Storm basically being amazing up there. (I feel like it'd be more satisfying to have a non-Omega show them that sheer power isn't the only measure of awesome. I did like watching her use teamwork to kick Vulcan's ass though.)
That said, why did you not realize this would be a thing, Xavier? Arakkans make no secret of how their society works.
--
Now, sadly, we skip the legal conference about the X-Babies. Presumably it goes well and no one mocks Xavier, but I'm kind of fascinated by the idea.
But then we get the official Treehouse lighting ceremony:
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...are you really feeling left out because your two former child soldiers are getting honored as "mutantkind's greatest heroes".
Fucking REALLY?
Are you living among humans and saving them from various threats? Heck, are you sticking around to help hand out meals, as the mayor mentions? Because you're not down there, and your itinerary says you'll be having a meeting about Orchis with Beast in like an hour.
It presumably goes well, because we skip ahead to sparring with Logan.
This goes pretty straightforward. They have a heart to heart, which I appreciate, because I'm still utterly boggled by that bit in X Lives of Wolverine where he claims that, despite their respective ages, Logan sees Chuck as a father figure.
By the way, Logan doesn't act like a "son" in this scene at all. He does give some legitimately good advice though and asks the question that's the point of all this:
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And for FUCK'S SAKE, Xavier. The fact that this is apparently an armor piercing question, after a day where the WORST thing that happened to you was having a few appointments go on without you, getting stood up by a dude who's got every reason to dislike you, and seeing Kitty, Scott and Jean get SOME MEASURE of weak recognition.
THAT's what leads to the "It's a Wonderful Life" moment?
I mean, presumably, the interview with Trish Trilby which happens before the sparring match goes well. Meaning you're going to be on the fucking news as the face of Krakoa again. But that hardly matters because the Mayor of New York considers your SURROGATE CHILDREN to be the greatest heroes.
You couldn't even be HAPPY for them?!
(I also can't help but note that upon meeting AoA Cyclops, who assumes Xavier is an escaped clone and tries to kill him, we see no sign of the ACTUAL character's complexity or depth. He's just a random villain here. Because in the end, it's all about Xavier's ego.
He does refer to Scott as "the most pragmatic man I've ever known", which is a really interesting description that I'm not sure I agree with. But that's an analysis for another day.)
Anyway, as mentioned, the rest of the story is basically just fueling Xavier's ego. I mean, Age of Apocalypse IS a hellhole. (Though a friend of mine suggested once that possibly the only thing Age of Apocalypse proved that Xavier was necessary for is preventing Mr. Sinister from regaining control of Cyclops. I think I'd have to reread the story to see if I agree, but since I hate Xavier, I DO like that thought.) And he does bring them Krakoa and joy.
But I'm just going to bask in the fact that Xavier's deepest pain on Krakoa is that someone occasionally recognizes other people instead of him. I bet he hated Scott's Rolling Stone cover too. :-D
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bonezone44 · 2 days ago
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✨Pedro Stories Secret Santa✨
'Educational Benefits' (18+)
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Mr. Ben x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 4250
Tags: friends with benefits, secret relationship, oral (f receiving), protected p-in-v, sweet inexperienced!Ben, experienced Reader
for my PedroStories Secret Santa: @musings-of-a-rose 🙏 I hope you enjoy!
Summary: Within the first few months of teaching at St. Lawrence High School, you developed an arrangement with the Algebra teacher, Mr. Ben. And it was full of a lot more surprises than you had anticipated….
-----
It was Friday afternoon after a long, arduous semester at St. Lawrence High School. The students were always the most restless before winter break, anxious to be out enjoying the snow. You tried desperately to get some quiet time to grade their final exams by putting on a movie, but you spent most of your time shushing them. You had to use your free period to finish grading instead. When you really wanted to use that time to get organized for next semester. You sighed. ‘So much for that.’ 
By three o'clock, you had been staring at columns of numbers for so long, your brain started to twist in on itself. Your body ached, your stomach growled, the dim winter sun begged for you to wrap yourself in a soft, fluffy blanket. But much like the school children, you were too antsy for that. Too much time spent curled around your desk. Too much work-work-work. 
But unlike your students, you had no intention of spending your evening playing in the snow. You needed time away from the icy roads and flurried skies. You needed to stay warm. Quite warm. You needed to get laid.
You made your way down the main hall, the clack of your shoes echoing out. You passed your favorite coworker's classroom just as he was packing up. You had to grit your teeth at the sight of his broad shoulders moving beneath his black sweater as he loaded notebooks into his satchel. Your arms wanted to wrap around his middle and pull him close. Your hands wanted to slip beneath his waistband. Your tongue wanted to trace his scruffy jawline and your teeth wanted to playfully tug on his ear. 
It took a long deep breath to bring you out of your fantasy and into the present.
“Hey, Ben,” you called casually, as if you hadn't just fucked him three different ways in your mind.
He glanced over his shoulder with one questioning eyebrow raised. He brightened at the sight of you, a wide smile on his lips. “Hey! What's up?” He tossed another folder in his bag and zipped it closed. 
“Exhausted,” you groaned. “How are you?”
Ben laughed. “I'm about the same. I can't wait to get out of here.”
“Me, too.” You pressed your fingers to your eyelids. “My eyes are burning from submitting grades.”
“Oh yeah, I can't wait to get away from these screens.” He slipped the strap of his bag around his shoulder and headed in your direction.
You leaned back from the door to check the hallway–empty. You lowered your voice to be safe. “You going out to Tilly's tonight?”
“Absolutely,” he said with a smirk. Then with sudden concern, “Are you?”
“Of course!”
“Good.” He nodded, looking you up and down and biting his lip. “Good.” 
You giggled as he joined you at the door. “Also, I'm excited to see what Ms. Ladner's like with a few drinks in her.”
Ben stopped in his tracks, throwing his head back in laughter. “Oh, you're gonna love it. I promise you.” He turned off the light and closed the door to his classroom, still snickering to himself. 
“I'll see you there around seven?” You grinned.
“Don't worry,” he nodded. “I'll be there.”
—-
Three drinks in and Ms. Ladner, the school's biology teacher of thirty years, was on stage singing karaoke at the top of her lungs: an operatic version of “I'm Every Woman” by Chaka Khan. Her cheeks were bright pink. Gray curls stuck to the edges of her forehead with sweat. Her usual red lipstick was long gone and her dark blue eyeliner had started to smudge. 
You and Ben clapped and cheered from the crowd with the rest of the teachers and staff who chose to attend the celebration that evening. Two weeks. No school. No students. The bar, Tilly's, was the gang's regular choice. 
Back at the table, Jeff, the P.E. teacher, and Mr. Menendez, who taught history, began arguing over which fuel in their grills made for better steak. 
“The heat distribution is just as even with coal,” argued Jeff.
“Nononono,” Mr. Menendez shook his head fervently. “No it is not. You are a caveman!” He yelled down at the table, rocking back and forth in his chair.
Jeff turned to him in bright offense. “I'm not a caveman–”
“You are! You are a Neolithic peasant!” he spat. “You burn dirty rocks to char your sad little flanks of animal flesh you purchase for yourself at the Wal-Mart!” He scoffed, crossing his arms over his thick beige sweater vest. “Be a man of the future, you coward!” He slammed his fist down on the table. “Propane burns clean and pure!” 
Jeff pinched his fingers together. “What is more pure than tradition, Miguel? What is more pure than-than-than digging with my bare hands from the earth–”
Mr. Menendez burped and continued to shake his head.
Jeff's eyes grew wide. “--and discovering a-a-a rock that can hold fire, huh? What's more pure than that?”
“It is filthy! It is filth to cook with coal! God gave us propane to save us from the muck! To render us free from the dirty, dirty ground! Peasant!” He shouted, his gaze fixed on the sticky table. “You are a peasant!”
“This is getting weird,” Ben spoke to you out of the side of his mouth. 
“Oh, Ben? And what say you? Hmm?” Asked Mr. Menendez, his eyes suddenly pierced and focused at the man across the table. “How do you fuel the fire within?”
You covered your mouth as you laughed at Ben suddenly squirming in his seat next to you, fidgeting with the collar of his bright blue button-up. “Uhh… well, if we're still talking about grills, I don't –I don't have one.”
“What?!” Jeff jumped from his seat.
“How do you call yourself a man?!” Mr. Menendez cried with disdain.
Ben furrowed his brow. “Well, I live in an apartment aaand I don't have a balcony or anything.”
“Oh.” Jeff retreated. He adjusted the waistband of his track pants and sat back down.
Mr. Menendez was less assured. “A real man would find a way.” He raised his finger in the air. “A real man would use propane to find a way.”
Jeff scoffed loudly and rolled his eyes,  turning to the aging man at his side. “How is propane more manly than coal?!” 
You leaned over Ben's shoulder. “I don't know how much more I can take of this–” 
“Yeah, me, either,” he murmured, one of his fingers nudging your knee beneath the table.
Ms. Ladner joined the group, shoving herself into the booth seat next to you and in turn, shoving you into Ben. Fire burst through you to be so close to him in front of your co-workers. You had both been doing your best to keep a polite distance before scurrying away to his place at the end of the evening. 
“I'm so glad you came!” Ms. Ladner cheered, alcohol strong on her breath. “I love it when young new teachers join the good fight!” 
You laughed, feeling trapped. Should you move closer to Ben or closer to Ms. Ladner, who was yelling in your ear? “Well, I'm not that young–” you began. 
“Oh, you're all young to me!” Ms. Ladner giggled. “Young and fresh! Right, Menendez?” She turned to face him.
“Infants!” He threw his finger up. “All of you!”
Ms. Ladner cackled and kicked her feet. “Jeffrey!” She shouted and reached across the table with desperate fingers. “What do you think of her?”
Your stomach dropped. You barely knew Jeff at all. This was your first time socializing with him outside of school.
Jeff's eyes bugged and his mouth dropped. “I uhh… ummm….”
“It's–It's fine!” You offered a polite smile and waved your hand. “You don't have to answer!” 
“Oh come on!” Ms. Ladner pressed. “Feedback is important to the development of our new teachers!” 
You attempted to correct her. “Well, I'm not new to teaching–” 
Ben piped up. “I've been hearing good things from her students.”
“Really?” Ms. Ladner brought her hands to her chest with delight. “Oh that is so good to hear!” She rested her head on your shoulder. Her curls smelled like coconuts.
You laughed uncomfortably. “Uh… who is driving you home, Ms. Ladner?” 
“Mr. Johnson!” She popped up with cheer. 
“Yeah! Mr. Johnson!” Jeff raised his empty beer glass. 
“Mr. Johnson!” raved Mr. Menendez. 
“The… the principal?” You asked.
“Mhmm,” she nodded. “Mr. Johnson comes by every year at eleven o'clock and takes all us saps home,” she grinned and sighed wistfully. “And then he uses it as blackmail for the rest of the year to get us to do his bidding.” She giggled with evil glee. She grabbed your drink and raised it in the air. “To Mr. Johnson!”
Jeff, Mr. Menendez and Ben raised their glasses as well, cheering together. “To Mr. Johnson!”
Jeff drank from his empty glass. Mr. Menendez chewed on the remaining melting ice cubes in his drink. Ben sipped his soda. And Ms. Ladner finished the rest of your cocktail–which was mostly water at that point.
You rolled your eyes and dropped your face in your hands–more than done with the festivities and liquored-up bonding rituals. You wanted to spend time with Ben before you really got tired. “You know, it's getting kind of late–”
“No, don't go, yet!” Ms. Ladner pouted, her face contorting into that of a sad child. “Stay!” She cried out and wrapped her arms around your shoulders, the weight of her slamming you further into Ben. You grabbed his thigh to keep yourself upright.
Ben's warm fingers found your own. “Yeah, I think I might head out, too.” He said with his eyes on everyone but you. You felt fire burning through you all over again.
“Oh, but I'll miss you!” Said Ms. Ladner. “I'll miss you both so much!” She squeezed you tighter.
You were close enough to Ben that his laughter vibrated through you–sending sparks of excitement along your skin. But being constricted by Ms. Ladner nearly dulled the experience. And while you enjoyed her drunken fondness for you, you would much rather spend time with Ben. It had become more than necessary over the course of the evening–feeling overwhelmed by experiencing the somewhat unappealing side of your new work family. 
“I'll miss you, too, Ms. Ladner,” you pried her arms from around you. 
It took about twenty minutes for you and Ben to say your goodbyes to the crowded bar, declining offers for more drinks. One more teacher decided to leave, as well, which you were quietly grateful for. 
“Have a good night, Lisa!” You called out as you walked to your car.
“You, too!” She sang back. “See you next year!” 
“Night, Ben!” You waved across the parking lot.
“Good night!” He waved back just as casually.
—--
Your lips were on Ben's as soon as he opened his apartment door, only stopping to prevent yourself from stumbling.
“I have been waiting for this all day,” you murmured into his mouth. You stepped back with wide eyes. “I-I mean, it's just… been a while and stuff,” you let out a breathy laugh.
Ben grinned with sparkling eyes. “Yeah, I'm excited, too.” He circled his arm behind your waist and guided you in. 
His touch was more than welcome, but not enough. You shucked off your layers, tossing your coat, scarf, and hat on his kitchen counter. “I'm gonna freshen up real quick and try to get some of Ms. Ladner's sweat off of me,” you clapped your hands with a smile. “If you wanna meet me in the bedroom.” You walked backwards further into his home. “I have a surprise for you.”
He scratched the back of his neck, his lips curling up around the edges. “Yeah, yeah. Okay.” 
You scurried to the bathroom with your handbag in giddy excitement. You undressed and pulled out your feminine wipes to do a quick cleaning of the important areas. You rolled your favorite perfume on the back of your neck. You changed into the lingerie you packed and slipped on a silky black miniskirt. You felt sexy and confident when you looked in the mirror. You couldn't wait to show Ben.
When you peeked into his room, Ben was sitting at the end of his bed still fully clothed, bobbing his head to the music coming out of his stereo. He smiled brightly at the sight of you.
“What do you think?” You asked, fingertips moving along the strap of your blue mesh bra. “You like the surprise?”
“Yeah!” He nodded. “It's freaky! I'm into it!”
A laugh burst out of you before you could stop it. “Ben!” All the heat in the room escaping. “Oh my god!” You huffed.
“What?” He whined, his excited gaze never leaving your chest.
You put your hands on your hips, shaking your head with a warm smile. “If you think this bra is freaky, I don't know what you're gonna say about my crotchless underwear.”
“...what?” he asked again, only this time with doe eyes and a gaping mouth.
You covered your mouth and laughed. “You are so pure!” You stomped forward and wrapped your arms around his head, bringing his face to your bosom. His curls smelled like cologne and his thin beard scratched your exposed skin. “What kind if porn do you even watch?” God, he was so adorable.
“I… I don't watch porn.”
“Wait... what?” You pull away from him and grab his face in your hands–staring into his big brown eyes for clarity. 
“I don't watch porn,” he repeated.
“Why not?”
“W-Well…” He stuttered a moment trying to find the right words. “I-isnt that a good thing? Porn is like… degrading to women and wrong and stuff.”
You squeezed his cheeks together in the palms of your hands and pouted. “You are so freaking cute, Ben.”
“What?” He slurred through his bulging cheeks. He truly seemed lost. 
“Ben!” You dropped his face and put your hands on your hips again. “I know you were not a virgin when I met you.”
“Of course not, but–”
“So what did you do with your ex-girlfriends?”
“Well…” He straightened his posture. “That's private.”
You giggled. “I'm not asking for the juicy details. But like… what? Did you guys just do missionary the whole time? Have you even done it doggy-style?”
He pouted and shrugged. “I wanted to see their face.”
“Ben!” You were tickled to pieces. “You are so precious! Oh my god!” 
“I-I don't understand what's happening…”
You blinked and rubbed your hands together. “Oh my god, we have so much to cover.” 
“Cover?”
“I have so much I wanna show you!” You stared into his big eyes with devilish enthusiasm. “I mean, do you even know why the students call you Daddy?”
“I figured it's because I'm old,” he said, scratching the back of his neck. “Wait!” He looked at you in horror. “It's the sex thing?!”
“Noo!! Nonono!!” You braced his shoulders.
He dropped his head in his hands. “I don't know if I can have this conversation. I don't know if I can have sex anymore.”
“No! Listen listen listen.” You whined and tried to save yourself. You needed this. You really needed this. “Ben, you know, kids are kids and the students don't really understand what they're saying half the time and they just kinda repeat whatever they hear from adults and it's not really a sex thing to them.” You stared off. “Maybe it's more of a kink thing kind of–”
“What's the difference?!” He stared at you bewildered.
“Shit! No! It's not–it's not like that, okay? Kink isn't necessarily sexual!” You waved your palms at him as you kept digging yourself into a hole. “Let’s just–let’s start over, okay? We made this whole arrangement so we didn’t have to think about work and we could just be adults and have a-a-a good time.” You forced a smile, wringing your hands together. “We’re just two adults alone in your apartment and-and-and we’re gonna enjoy some time together, okay?”
He closed his eyes and released a heavy breath. He seemed stable when he opened them again. “Okay. Yes. You’re right. We can do this.”
“Yes!” You clapped your hands together. “We can do this.”
He reached forward, slowly, and patted your bare stomach with his palms.
“...what are you doing?” You looked down at him confused.
“I-I have no idea.” He shook his head dumbly. “I don’t know what to do now.”
You giggled, rolling your eyes. The students may call him ‘Daddy’, but he was not one for taking control. Something you should have picked up on from the beginning. You placed your hands on top of his. “How’s this?” you asked and guided his hands down your skirt and around to the back of your thighs. You stepped between his legs, nudging his knees further apart. He took the cue and began moving his big hands up and down your thighs. You ran your fingers across his scalp, through the light gel in his curls. “Is that better?”
He nodded, pressing a kiss near your belly button. His lips trailed down and he kissed your mound through your skirt. “Can I–” he coughed and cleared his throat. “Can I see what’s underneath?” 
You smirked and wrapped your fingers around the bottom of your skirt, slowly rolling it up to expose yourself. He looked up at you in shock, ears turning pink in the dim light of his room. The blue underwear was mesh like your bra with a satin ribbon edge. It covered your mound and split at the bottom exposing your labia. You lifted your leg and rested your foot next to his thigh on the bed. You nudged him with your toes. “Do you like it?”
He nodded speechless.
“Do you wanna taste it?” you asked. 
His eyes were locked to yours as he moved forward. The tip of his tongue leaving his mouth, probing into your folds. His hands moved up your thighs to your ass, fingers digging through the fabric of your panties and squeezing you closer. 
“Oh wow,” you breathed out. You’re not sure if it was his skill or your touch-starved pussy, but his mouth felt like wet heaven.
He closed his eyes, dug his tongue deeper into your folds, rolling it against your clit in steady passes. You ran your fingers across the back of his head and pet him with tender wonder. You had been the one to ask him out for coffee. You had been the one to start talking about old relationships. And after hearing his series of heartbreaks, you had been the one to propose the idea of a strictly physical relationship. You had a long line of heartbreaks, too. You knew you shouldn’t fool around with a co-worker, but he was too delicious and too open for you to say ‘no’ to.
A finger sliding against your entrance shook you from your thoughts. “Wait,” you gasped.
“What’s wrong?” Ben stopped touching you immediately, worry evident on his brow. “Are you okay?”
“I’m more than okay.” You leaned down and kissed his wet lips, licking into his mouth and tasting your own slick. “I need to lie down so I don’t fall over.”
“Yeah?” Ben’s face showed a boyish excitement.
You giggled. He was too sweet. You crawled into the bed and spread your legs and Ben crawled between them. He sucked two of his thick fingers into his mouth and pulled them back out glistening. He started with one finger, slowly pressing it into your entrance and twisting his hand around. 
“You’re soaked,” he murmured, biting his lip. He leaned back down, circling your clit with the tip of his tongue as his finger prodded you. 
You rolled your hips into his mouth. His other hand pressed you into the mattress, pinning you in place. A second finger joined his first and you breathed through the stretch. He sucked and laved at your clit, his fingers moving in and out of you slowly. You had been prepared to guide him through it, having some questions about his level of experience. But he worked his mouth on you like an expert. Tonguing and slurping all your nerve endings, sending your toes curling. Holding you in place like he had something to prove. And maybe he did. And you were more than willing to listen.
“Want me to grab a condom?” he asked, your slick covering the lower half of his face.
“Yes, please!” You grinned. “And if you’re willing…” You sat up and got on all fours.
Ben’s face turned red as he stood at his nightstand. He covered his face with his hand and sighed. “Okay, okay,” he laughed. He shucked off his clothes, nearly falling over as he tugged on the boxer briefs that caught on his foot. He kneeled behind you on the bed, rolling on the condom. “For the record, I’m only doing this because you asked,” he said. “I would rather be looking at your face.”
You laughed, looking at him over your shoulder. “I think you’ll enjoy this, Ben.” You smirked. “Maybe you’ll learn something new about yourself.”
“I–” he stopped and sighed. His skin was warm against your back as he propped himself up above you. “Maybe you’re right, actually,” he murmured and kissed your shoulder. He pressed his cock against your entrance, slowly thrusting in.
“Holy shit,” you sighed, his girth pressing against all your inner points of pleasure. The stretch of him was a release–weeks of tension throughout your body unfurling and sprawling outward. You had forgotten how it felt to be penetrated by him. The reminder was delectable.
“How’s that? Is that good?”
“Oh my god, yes.” You began pushing your hips back into his, wanting him deeper.
“Yeah? You like that?” He whispered.
You fell forward, hiding your smirk in his sheets. “More, please, Ben,” you said after turning your face to the side.
His hips rolled and flicked into you. “Shit,” he gasped, his hands gripping your hips. 
This really was new for him, you could feel the hesitancy in his thrusts and you moaned in encouragement–and also because it felt so so good. You reached back, squeezing his hand in yours and his thrusts grew stronger, harsher, shoving you downward just the way you liked. It was very different than the other two times you had sex. “Oh my god. Ben!” you cried, his hips loudly slapping against your ass. You groaned. “Please don't stop!”
“Yeah? You like that?” His voice still at half volume.
“Fuck yes,” you moaned, toes curling all over again. You can’t imagine how this must be for him. Someone so new, so adventurous. Fucking them through their panties. Maybe this was what you needed, too. Someone to guide and explore with instead of constantly performing for. Shit, you were thinking too much. You–
Ben’s hands groped harshly at your breasts. His sweaty chest heavy on your back. His breath in your ear. “Is this what you wanted, baby?”
You whimpered, one hand holding you up and one hand on his. 
“Oh fuck,” he moaned in your ear. “I’m gonna come. I’m gonna come, baby.”
“Pleasepleaseplease” You didn’t care that you hadn’t come, yet. The night wasn’t over. You felt it as he gasped, his cock pumping and throbbing into you–into the condom, really. 
“Shit, I’m so sorry,” he said. 
You turned around after he pulled out. The tip of the condom was full of his white load. 
“I’m so sorry. That wasn’t like me,” he said with his head in his hands.
“Ben! No!” Your heart collapsed. He looked so remorseful. You wrapped your arms around him. “That was wonderful! That was fantastic!”
“But I finished before you–”
“So what? That felt amazing!”
“I don’t know.” He squirmed.
“Look at me, Ben.”
He complied. His eyes were blurry and his brows were twisted.
“What are you worried about?” You softly pet his broad shoulders.
“I-I feel like I used you or something–”
“Well, that’s what sex is sometimes.”
“I don’t know.” He scratched the back of his neck.
“Look, Ben. I don’t want you to do anything you’re not comfortable doing, but you didn’t do anything wrong. We made this arrangement to have sex without all the emotional attachments.” Even as you said it, you could feel yourself anchoring your heart to his. “I encouraged you. You didn’t cross any of my boundaries. I want you to feel safe exploring a different way of having sex.”
“Okay, okay.” He took a deep breath, nodding. “I just don’t wanna disrespect you.” He grabbed your hand, kissing your knuckles.
“Ben…”  You melted. “Even if you do disrespect me, we’ll talk about it.”
His big brown eyes looked hopeful.
“We’ll do some conflict resolution and figure it out.” You shrugged. “The problem is if you keep disrespecting me again and again. Then, yeah.” You nodded. “That’s something to be upset about.”
“Yeah,” he smiled, seemingly appeased. “Okay.”
“Now… You do have to get your mouth back down there–” you pointed between your legs. “And make me come at least twice before I leave.”
Ben let go of your hand, laughing. “I can do that.”
“Good.” You grinned. “Now get to it, bucko!”
He spread your legs with the palms of his hands, kissing between your legs as if he was kissing you on the mouth. Deep, hungry, fervent.
—----------------------
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sukunas-wife · 1 day ago
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HAH BACK IN TIME FOR CHRISTMAS! I was working on a little Christmas piece but ran out of time it’s 11:55 so have a little foot ball Sukuna head canon 🤍🤍🎄🎄🌟 and-
MERRY CHRISTMAS
Sukuna is the kind of player who if you’re talking to him when he needs to go change in the locker room, will drop his helmet on your head and rip his jersey off and throw it over the helmet and guid your blind into the locker rooms and you’ll just stand there yapping and all his teammates are spilt between hating it, or smiling because “No way in hell Sukuna brought her in here”
On away games, it’s a given that for your boyfriend you make him a little care pack, and I don’t mean a blanket a pillow and lip gloss and all that stuff, he was confused at first when you said you wanted to give him something, he was ready to roll his eyes and say “No I don’t need your Hello Kitty keychain bullshit to remember you, I’ll literally be backing in the morning” he actually does hang your Sanrio keychain on his duffle bag and flexes it hard and flips off his teammates for trying to bully it, but some of them low key think it’s cute and kinda funny so some of them end up getting funny little plush keychains for their own bags- but that’s not what happens, he’s actually surprised when you give him a little bag with icy hot patches, Gatorade, little snack protein bars he carries around, candies he usually steals from you ZzzQuill, he actually cracks a small smile and laughs amused, nodding as he tied the bag taking it away with him
When it’s a long day, and he’s groaning in aches and pains, he’ll lay face down shirtless in bed, and just hand you a bottle of Icy Hot, Tiger Balm or Cortisone cream, he showed you how to wrap a gauze so you can rub him down and wrap up his achey parts, sure the room smells and your eyes water a bit, but he loves you all the more, he’ll hug you into his side and order takeout and let you choose a movie more often than not, he’ll fall asleep in the weirdest positions if he’s not crushing you with his weigh
Your purse, bag, book bag, pockets (if you have em) sometimes even your jacket hood will have one of his snacks stored away in it and you won’t even know, there you are talking to him and he casually pulls your purse from you opens it up and there’s a magically a protein bar he starts eating, he walking with you as you complain about your bag being heavy and he gives you a weird look and leans back to look ah your bag, “Oh, that’s where I left it” and he’ll pull out a blender bottle full of whatever drink he chose that morning, not his favorite as when you run up to hug him during the winter, he’ll wrap an arm around your shoulder, look down and use his free hand to drop something into the hood of your jacket and once again at the most unexpected time he’ll reach behind you, pull it out and offer you some as if he didn’t just shake you around by your hood just to get a snack out of you
Games: if he doesn’t see you immediately and it’s not play time yet, you can see him just yawning and looking around bored, but internally he’s looking for your face and mumbling “Where’s that woman at?” It’s a related process, as he stands and walks around, just looking, the same sentence reworded, “Woman, where are you?” Where’s my woman? “I can’t see her, where the hells she a- oh there she is”
People think he’s a flirt, and likes the attention, the truth is, he doesn’t care much for female or male attention, he’s doing it all for the chance to make it big and make big money, so when women are crying out for him, he just seems uninterested and says “let me introduce you too” and drags whoever is closest to him to deal with whoever was trying to touch him
When he’s making impressive plays, in the moment he doesn’t dare look at you, he says if he wants to see you smile it’s not going to be a sympathy smile because he fucked up, it better be a smile because you saw the complicated shit he just pulled
When he lands a touch down, he doesn’t gloat or look at cameras, he looks directly at you with a hard stare (it’s not intentional, he’s just in the zone) and he point at you, that’s it, no heart or air kiss, no you just need to know, that’s his way of saying ‘That’s for you short stack’
Winning games, go one of two ways, he loves to just go home and groan and lay on the bed or sofa and doesn’t even shower just stretches out all his sore muscles and just relaxes with you i til he decides you can get up and shower and order in whatever food, or he showers and changed in the locker room and takes you out to eat, he actually hates bars, he hates fast cheap drinks, even at expensive bars he feels like his drinking experience should end in 5 minutes, so he takes you out to dinner in a nice place, sit down and just celebrate his win slowly unwinding the day
Losing game, if he’s angry, it’s best to just sit in silence with him and let him think over it and process it. What went wrong, what did he do wrong. Where does he need to improve, sometimes he just needs to rant it out and figure it out himself so he can understand. If it’s a sad loss, there are just some times where you’ll go home in silence, he’ll walk straight to shower, you’ll have to fix his bed and get him clean clothes, turn on the ac and leave something running on the tv, he’ll come out the shower, quiet, staring down laps in whatever thought clouds his mind, lay down and let him play between your legs with his head on your chest, hold him and let him rest, run your hand through his hair gently and run your hand over his back, let him have his moments of peace and just be with him <3
I know nothing about American football but picturing college bf!sukuna all sweaty in an American football uniform makes me feel things
bonus if he gives you his college jersey to wear at his games for good luck, he likes to show off on purpose for you
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dazais-guardian-angel · 2 years ago
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we are never getting off of Bones’ Wild Ride, lads
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heartorbit · 8 months ago
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the star you've longed for
#PLEASE WATCH REVUE STARLIGHT!!!!!!💥💥💥💥💥#project sekai#revue starlight#pjsk#emu otori#nene kusanagi#emunene#prsk#proseka#yuri win. i make my fav pairing fight tothe death#HAPPY EMUNENE WEEK LOOOOOL#Can i be hinestni think this sucks it took way too long cause i forgot how to draw for a week#im seeing demons and stuff. i feel more normal now. Also you may recall emu has a big hammer for revstar#thats the bottom of it the gem thing all the weapons have hers is sharp#i remember seeing meta post abt how mahiru has a blunt weapon because she never actually aimed for the lead role#rather she only wanted to be by karen's side. so her weapon wasnt capable of cutting anything in the first place#Fastforward to the movie and well LOLLLLL#though i think its funny in the movie her mace is still mostly used for i timidation againstbhikari.. bc again shes not winning for a lead#revue starlight youre neat. maybe i like revstar.#<- has been insane for 4+ years#Needed their pose to be smth where nenes weapon isnt visible because I DONT KNOW WHAT WEAPON TO GIVE HER. OOMFS HELP. I NEED A NENE WEAPON.#i thought some sort of polearm/spear/halberd etc something with range but that can be ambitious#but i feel like smth with that much footwork needed doesnt suit her.. And she cant hsve a sniper i dont think thatwould fucking work#aruru gets pistols in the revue but aruru also is Ummm well shes uhhh. [screaming] [car crash]#throwing knives would be funny wouldnt it. Put that gamer aim to use#idk if the emunene week tag is on here but i'll donit anyways#emuneneweek2024#EDIT: i have decided nene gets a rapier. its awesome. thanks for coming#tsukasa has his giant flag and i dont want to budge on that. im thinking about giving rui the throwing knives since he juggles.#it would be funny. saki + rui knife juggling
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deoidesign · 4 months ago
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Thinks about my next series again... I drew the icon for it!
I'm planning to have it launched within a year! I'm hoping for summer 2025. I want to make a prelaunch page before Time and Time Again ends so people can subscribe if they're interested, but I'm worried the series return would be too early...
#SORRY HAHAHA REPOSTING IMMEDIATELY#i. it. IM SORRY okay the.#i had 'im not interested in the comic' as an option but it immediately made me feel bad#DONT FEEL BAD IF YOU PICKED IT i put it there#i just realized its not really a helpful metric to me at all!#im making the comic either way!#so i just want to gague interest. disinterest doesnt do much for me. you can come and go as you please!#just wanting to retain readers as much as possible but without losing them due to taking too long#ahhhh the balance of marketing. a beautiful beast she is.#anyways yeah hoping to launch like about as tta is ending#or like at LEAST a prelaunch page by then#im also not intending for the prelaunch page to be like. announced...#moreso just a link i append on art for the series!#just so when a drawing of zagan gets 500 notes#people who are interested in what hes from can. see that...#anyways. sorry i haven't been posting work is wild im going 70+ hours a week again i am so tired#not much time to draw non work stuff#im hanging on by a thread of having multiple projects i can bounce between again#and sometimes thats this one! so heres the results of some mental health work variety#we were legion#polls#sorry for the instant repost. in my defense. i am exhausted.#i can not wait until im making a different comic that i can do a fucking. normal ass schedule with#where im not every week gasping for breath in some kind of bad at swimming metaphor.#anyways if youre not interested dont tell me. it doesnt matter to me. no offense but i just dont wanna hear it.#i want to make the comic and my audience as much as i love you all is not going to have any control over what i do with my art#im gonna make this comic if i only get it done on weekends after getting home from the fuckin movie theater#i am not working for webtoon again wnd im not forcing myself into the dirt for comics again#but im also never gonna stop making them. just need to build a healthier relationship!#FUCK I MADE IT A ONE DAY POLL.
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luck-of-the-drawings · 9 months ago
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!!! FLASHING LIGHTS WARNING!!! [IM NOT FUCKIN AROUND!!]
REACHED THE CUSP OF 'THIS MAY NEVER BE ABSOLUTELY FINISHED N IF I DONT SHOW IT NOW, IT WILL NEVER SEE THE LIGHT OF DAY.' SO HERE, A PROJECT IVE BEEN ORBITING AROUND UHH SINCE 2021 OR SO.
#jrwi fanart#THE SQUIRMING IMAGE#jrwi riptide#gillion tidestrider#cw flashing lights#LOOORRD OF LIGHTNING SAAAAVE ME!!!!#RAAAHHHH I LOVETHIS SONG SO FUCKIN MUCH AND I LOVE GILLION SO FUCKIN MUCH RAAHHHH!! RAAHHHH!!!#BUT YES YES I HAD LIKE A WHOLE OTHER HALF TO THIS SKETCHED OUT BUT IT WONT FINISH COOKIN FOR A MILLION YEAARS!!!!#MAYBE SOMEDAY.....#ANYWAY. this is my first time actually syncing audio to my animations. normally i domnt know howww.#i animated it all in fire alpaca AND THEN i mixed everything in a pirated movie maker. it kinda uh. sucks. but its WHAT I GOT BAYBE!!#i relaly like how i animate swishy hair... i was inspird by eris from sinbad. i can only HOPE i got on that level w the watery flowyness#LIUGHTNING IS HARD TO ANIMATE TOO. I WATCHED ALOTTA VIDEOS ABSORBED MINIMAL TUTORIALS AND UHH I THINK I DID OKAY!!#better than bad!!! but i can still do better. eventually. ugh. FLASHING LIGHTS TOO HUH? U LIKE ANIMATINGB FLASHING LIGHT?#U LIKE MAKING THE BLACK N WHITE FLICKER RLY FAST UNTIL UR EYES BLEED OUT UR SKULL?? YEAAAHH YOU DO!!!#im also vry proud o the title cards i made at the beginning teheheheh. dependign on where riptide goes i MIGHT change it#BUT HEY THEORY TIME? I HOPE ONE OF THE GODDESSES COMES DOWN TO PILOT GILLIONS BODY SO THEY CAN BEAT THE FUCK OUT O THE OTHER GODDESS#WHO IS ALSO IN SOMEONE ELSES MORTAL BODY. GODS COMING DOWN TO WREAK HAVOC OVER PETTY DISAGREEMENTS OOOGH HOW FUN!!#GOOD ON YOU CHAMPION!! YOUR VESSEL HAS BEEN TRAINED TO BE STRONG AND HARDY. PERFECT FOR CHANNELING DIVINE ENERGY.#OHHHH WHAT A PERFECT WEAPON YOU ARE. NOW GO AND IMMANENTIZE A WATERY ESCHATON#PARAGON OF OCEANS WRATH I WANT TO SEE YOU DROWN THE LAND. DESTROY!!! EAT!!! BURN!!! RAAAGHH I NEED GILLION TO GET MORE POWER!!!!#ALSO in other news i uh. actually posted this onto twitter forever ago but forgot to post it here bc i can only post it from pc and BABY!!#IM NOT ON THE COMPUTER OFTEN! NOT ANYMORE!! NOT ANYMOREE!!! IM FREE BAYBE!! i used to be so miserable. sometimes i think abt that.#ANYWAY. pls enjoy. just this much took so long. i love makin the lil guys move.... ouh.... hava good day if u get the chance to.
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