#IM STILL STUCK THERE ISTFG.

[bisociallyawkwardandchad]

they are sharing a smoke <3

[mako-neexu]

going insane over dantes and ordeal call chapter 2 post #234098 the way he says his flames burn hotter/more poisonous than in his normal Saint Graph and you literally remember he made a new Spirit Origin for guda and his NPs are literally ABOUT guda, the color choice in the 3rd ascension with blue accents on his stars and eyes said to be the color of guda's SOUL time and time again,　

and he also literally looks like goetia because "MY DESTINY" (istfg im going CRAZY. im going crazy!!! my desiny??? MY DESTINY!!?!?!?!?) and both him and dantes had that one on one to guda, goetia also made a hilariously BAD set up against himself so like dantes and guda became partners in crime in prison tower like goetia unintentionally played MATCHMAKER and created the worst duo ever im shitting tears. the probable reason as well why he looks like that in the 3rd ascension is because dantes viewed goetia as "an ultimate enemy guda overcame" which he positioned himself in as well so he could be defeated which was his goal in the first place i think im going to break from so much info bro. theres also the fact that prison tower and pseudo-tokyo are basically the same (that also required huge amount of mana) -> guda was dropped into prison tower, (directly/indirectly) helped by gankutsuou, stuck in chateau d'lf/becoming an Avenger by giving into temptation->bad end || overcoming the trials each floor/understanding the Avenger class, overcoming the flames-> return to chaldea. dantes positioning himself once more as both that tiny light of hope and that enemy who has guda fall into a trap likei am so. n.lromnal. I think i hauve covid

and thinking about. "my destiny" "my radiant one" "my one good thing" "my star" like- to be loved is to be changed. man. to be loved is to be!!!changed!!! and the blue and pink-purple flames that symbolize GUDA having been so special to him in this life that it changed him, BECAME SO SPECIAL TO HIM!!! (you can literally see it in his EYES??? his 4th aascension art where his flame is BLUE AS WELL??????????)

that he is still Avenger, Count of Monte Cristo, he who enacted vengeance and the greatest seeker of it, he who continues to hate and burn eternally yet chooses to love!!!!!!!!!!!!! becoming that tiny light of hope to an innocent soul and now here they stand, that tiny light he continued to protect now shines more radiant than anything else, and because of that love, his flames burn much much more fiercely than his previous saint graph and like he has you stay away bc you might evaporate to nothing and he explicitly says theyre stronger in his Monte Cristo alt!! while hes also trying to distance himself from you again bc he must still hold guilt in his heart for making you go through the Avenger ordeal and as well as the fact that you literally need to leave the flames/Avengers behind due to their conflicting nature with the wall bc being attached would be sooo hard to let go and especially considering what you and dantes went through together like what is this?? its like a giant slap of I LOVE YOU SO MUCH against my face????????? theres literally nothihg left of my remains????????????

dantes is also basically so stupidly even more overpowered here have you seen his skills??? Count of Monte Cristo Mythologie became a skill along with the fourteen relics/14 jewels and he can jUST cassually!???? activate that!?!?!?????? meanwhile WHAT HE CONSIDER AS HIS NOBLE PHANTASM IN THIS SAINT GRAPH IS O STAR/O YOU WHO, CONQUER THAT BRILLIANT PATH??? THAT VERY ONE ABOUT GUDA???? IS THIS REAL????? his NP dmg and effects are so crazy too???? LITERALLY POWERED BY LOVE AND BACKED UP BY AGE OF GODS LEVEL FUCK YOU ENERGY ?? im plagued by dantes and OC2 thoughts since last month someone free me ajdkfgk

[jaxrants]

Istfg

I really wanna go to bed. Like I'm practically falling asleep while standing up, but I can't because my stupid fucking step dad, and mom like coming home at 11:45 PM and expect me to still be all happy go lucky. I have to take care of your children all fucking day, and all of a sudden I'm lazy because I'm taking advantage of the little time I do have to actually lay down and relax.

But nooo, because I didn't do the dishes (just looking at the counter overwhelms me) now I've gotta stay up for the next 1 or 2 hours washing dishes.

And I mentioned, under my breath mind you, that this is the very reason why I hate being awake and all she said in response? "Well then, don't wake up tomorrow." wtf? Who says that to their kid because they're tired.

And she wants to act like taking care of her kids isn't exhausting. I wake up in the morning, surprise suprise, she's not here.

I'm so fucking exhausted. I wake up exhausted, I go to sleep exhausted. It's just a never ending tidal wave of being tired.

She ain't gotta worry about me getting pregnant as a teenager. Why? Oh because I already damn near have 2 kids. Another reason? Oh, cause I have no social life cause I've been locked in a house for five fucking years, not going to school, not having company. Nothing. I'm probably gonna be stuck here for the next three years of my life too.

I'm missing out on all of my teenage years because my mother would prefer it if I'm trapped just like her. But she wants me to be better than her. How tf can I do that if I'm not allowed to go anywhere or do anything. The only friends I have are online and the chances of me actually meeting up with them one day are slim because of just how low in the poverty chain I am. Also, aren't you supposed to use school as an easy way to make friends? I'm gonna be in my twenty's with no friends that I can hang out with because my mom decided that she just doesn't care about my fucking future, or me having healthy relationships with things.

Anytime I try to talk to her about my unhealthy relationships with things, she calls me stupid and tells me to get over it.

Mom, I can't hold a knife without envisioning mutilating myself or killing someone. I can't look at a gun without wondering what my brains would look like splattered on a wall.

I don't have a healthy relationship with food or the way I look either. I either eat too much or nothing at all. I make myself sick because I feel guilty if I don't eat all of something. I hate how chubby I am, but everytime I bring it up to my mom, or make a joke about the way I look (and this mostly happens when I'm actually feeling good about myself for once) she asks me if I really think I look good. Like..? Well, no, not anymore.

At this point, I'm pretty sure the only reason she keeps me around is so I can take care of her kids.

@purpleeggyboi @meadows-the-puppet @blooming-skeleton @im-a-simp898 @evry1h8s-me @th3-r4t-48

[foreverxdaydreaming]

never realize how many useless notifications you get until you put your volume on.. all of these emails / scams / marketing have ruined the importance of calls/notifications entirely,,

[lordbib]

6,13,14 and 16 :D

thank u anon <33

6. 3 characters that inspire you

1. Hange Zoe (duh). Hange is really a character i reside with a lot mainly because if you ask my friends which aot character im most like its probablyy Hange. They show me its okay to have a weird and chaotic side and also be an overall good person in general.

2. Hermione Granger. Shes cool shes smart and as yall probs know i had a majorr harry potter phase (like 4 years JHDSGF) and ya she really stuck out to me and i love her

3. Luna Lovegood. Luna is genuinely so cool and i love her sm. in hp there werent that many ravenclaw characters who were in the main storyline. Mainly just luna and cho. She, like Hange show me its okay to have a weird side.

13. 3 classes you used to hate in middle school

1. Religion. My mid school was a christian school and OH BOY WAS RELIGION SOMETHING. it wasnt hard, it was just annoying fhgjs. I respect anyones religion and i genuinely think religion is a beautiful thing. But in Indonesia religion just plays such a big part in everything and you are basically required to have one and ppl mock u if ur atheist or agnostic. As a gay, agnostic bitch it just constantly pissed me off having religion shoved in my face. So ya religion. Also some of my classmates were vv religious and in turn sexist and homophobic. In Kartini day (Kartini is a historic figure in Indonesia known for pushing the right of education for women) one of my classmates said "Why do women still want more rights, they already have many. Women having rights is good but im scared they will have too much." his fragile ass masculinity was begging for me to crush it smh

2. PKN (civics education) tbh pkn isnt hard either its just the same thing every yearrr. We learn about the constitution, Pancasila (indonesias 5 basic rules) and etc just every time. I cant count how many times ive had to talk about the meaning of each sila in the pancasila smh.

3. POE (program of entrepreneurship) . tbh it was okay like it wasnt inherently bad. And its cool that we had that lesson. But i didnt feel like i got anything from it?? like i dont feel like i learned anything from it. we just did observations, essays about a certain company's history, exercises that were just annoying to do etc

14. 3 professions that you would like to try

1. Idk something in science? Ive always been inherently good and interested at science, and solving stuff using logic sooo i think it would be a really fun field.

2. Music. i lovee singing and just likeee songering jdgfshg (u filos are getting to me istfg) soo maybe in music? im learning guitar and i would love to start writing songs.

3. Something with travelling. i love finding out about new places and just travelling in general soo it would be super fun hihi

[doesrandomstuff]

It's been about 2 wks since school ended & im still fucking stressed about it, especially since I practically kinda sorta failed my AG Chemistry class— If I hadn't gone over to my moms place for the summer, I probably would've been stuck in summer school & having to deal with my stepmom get all mad at me for "being lazy" or shit like that—

Istfg, if I don't get beginning drama next school yr, then I'm probably gonna be stuck in a credit recovery class— Then I'd have to deal with my stepmom more often than before—

Fuck— I might've even gotten my electronics taken away, leaving me having to just... Try to keep myself together without my friends to help me...

I shouldn't be talking about this... Sorry—