#I've wanted to make this forever but was wracking my brain on a way to say this in actually sixteen syllables

[grunty-posting]

[richonnesbitch]

Hey everyone! Here's chapter 1 of a fanfic I wrote about what would have went down had we gotten a bridge wedding in season 9. It's been wracking my brain forever so I just had to write it. If everyone likes it, I'll post chapter 2!

Rick marveled at the ring in his hand. Not only was the ring itself perfect, but the timing itself was. There was about a week's time before the bridge was completed and Rick was hoping to marry her on that exact day. His dream was about to come true.

He placed a hand on Gabriel's shoulder, giving it squeeze. "Thank you, Gabriel."

Gabriel smiled. "Congratulations, Rick. When are you going to propose?"

"Soon. Tonight. As soon as possible."

"Well, good luck.", Gabriel replied earnestly.

Rick smiled and nodded. "I want us to have the wedding the day the bridge is completed."

"You're gonna plan a wedding in only a week?"

Rick let out a chuckle. "I've been planning this for months."

Gabriel chuckled with him. "Okay, Rick. Good luck."

Rick pocketed the ring as he walked home, plotting the entire way on how he should make his move. He'd been so focused on the wedding itself he didn't even think on how he'd propose. And now he only had a week to do it. Heat took over his body as the jitters started to kick in.

-----------------------------

As Michonne walked into her home the smell of candles, spaghetti, and garlic bread overtook the room. Surprise grew on her face as she looked around the room. "Rick?"

"Hey." He was standing at the kitchen table pouring two glasses of red wine. He had a huge smile on his face and his eyes were as bright as the sun.

She begin to smile as well. "What's all this about?"

"Just supper. Hope you're hungry."

"I am. Where's Judith?"

"Rosita offered her to stay the night. I thought me and you could have some time to ourselves." He pulled out a chair, gesturing for her to take a seat.

She knew he was up to something and she had a good idea of what it was but felt excited to see how this played out. She happily took her seat with Rick taking the chair next to her.

"This looks amazing.", she complimented the food, taking a bite of it. She nodded her head. "It is."

Rick was staring, still smiling at her. "Glad you like it." He grabbed her hand, using his thumb to rub her fingers. "How was your day?"

The two continued to talk as they ate. "Good. The garden is thriving, even more than last month. No one's sick in the infirmary right now. Alexandria's doing good."

Rick nodded his head. "Yeaaah. I knew you'd take good care of this place."

"We are taking care of place.", she firmly corrected him.

"Mmm... It's mostly you. I just wanted to say... you're doing an amazing job. And I really appreciate it. Thank you for everything that you do.", Rick complimented her sincerely. And he truly meant every word. He was so beyond grateful for this woman he felt like he couldn't find the words to express it. There were not words strong enough to show his appreciation for her. But he sure tried.

Every word hit her hard, sending tingles throughout her body. His voice did things to her when he spoke softly with his rough, southern drawl.

She decided to take the compliment. She had been working very hard lately and it was nice to feel appreciated. He always knew how to make her feel seen. "Thank you, Rick.", she responded with a hand squeeze. "What about you? How was your day?"

He still had that smile on his face, while also looking kind of sweaty. "Great. Really great. The bridge should be completed in about a week."

"Rick, that's amazing. We should do something to celebrate! Us, the rest of the communities."

Rick shook his head in agreement. "Yeah, I was thinking the same." That was the end of his sentence but it seemed like there was something else he wanted to say. Instead he said, "you don't like the wine?"

"Oh, sorry. I just... don't like the taste of wine and spaghetti."

"Let me get you some water then." He let go of her hand to get up but she tightened her grip.

"I can get it."

Rick laughed. "Let me.", he softly demanded. Michonne released his hand and he swiftly moved to fetch her a glass. "You want ice?"

"Sure."

She watched lovingly as he opened the freezer and grabbed a few cubes out the tray, dropping them into her water. He could feel her eyes on him. "So, this celebration thing... Kingdom will come, Hilltop will come. We can all bring some food. Maybe Eugene can be a DJ, you know since he's handy with that stuff. I'm sure he has all types of CD's, tapes, and whatnot. " He walked back to the table, setting her glass next to her plate and taking his seat again.

"You've got this all planned out, huh?"

He grinned. "Yeah, I guess."

"So when are we doing all this?"

"The night the bridge is complete."

"Have you talked to everyone else about this yet?"

"Well, a little bit. Not in detail. But I don't see why they wouldn't. This would be good for all of us."

"Well, you should talk to them as soon as possible since it's only a few days away."

"Yeah, I'll do that. But..." His voice became slightly shaky.

"But what?"

"I wanted to go over it with you first." He looked down, seemingly unable to meet her eyes. "Michonne... I've had this on my mind a while now. This bridge is the start of something new. It really feels like everything is finally coming together. All the communities coming together like this... this world was broken. And here you are putting the pieces back together. If anyone could do it, it's you." Suddenly he rose out of his chair and bent down on one knee pulling a ring out of the breast pocket of the plaid shirt he was wearing. "You are the love of my life. I love you so, so much. I'm yours till the day I die. Will you marry me?" Michonne could see his chest puffing up and down.

Her eyes begin to well up with tears. Slowly she joined him on his knees, taking both of his hands in hers. "If you would have told me all that time ago that we ended up here, I would have never believed you. I still can't believe it. I love you so much, Rick. You're my one true love. Of course I'll marry you."

Michonne felt Rick's cold wet tears trickle down his face as she pulled him in for a deep kiss. As they pulled away, the pair begin to laugh.

Quietly Rick stood up, taking Michonne's hand again. "Come on.", he whispered, guiding her upstairs to their bedroom. She continued to giggle.

The couple ravished one another as the night went on, just completely enjoying themselves together without a care in the world. They fought so long, so hard for simple moments like these and now their time had finally came. Nothing was gonna keep this from them ever again. Nothing and no one. To them, this was everything. They had the rest of their lives to spend together and not a single moment would go by unappreciated... least of all this one.

After a very long, very pleasureful night exhaustion started to consume them. As daylight slowly crept up on them, they decided it was time to finally get some rest.

"So. You're taking my last name, right?"

Michonne chuckled. "Yes, baby. I'm taking your last name."

Rick softly smiled, placing a tiny kiss on her shoulder as they laid cuddling in their bed. "Good."

[ugh-yoongi]

your hand is touching mine and i can't stop myself from taking it & Yoongi

thank you for the request! i've had this sitting in my drafts forever, so it gave me an excuse to finish it (and why it's so long dgkjd one day i will learn what a drabble is). i hope you enjoy it. <3

i call this yoongi's romantic comedy of errors.

pairing: yoongi x f. reader

genre: friends to lovers, miscommunication, fluff/comedy

warnings: reader is taehyung's sister, they're coworkers, yoongi is really bad at asking people out on dates someone pls help our boy, some swearing. this was long and i was too lazy to edit it, so if you see any mistakes no you didn't.

wordcount: 2100

taking valentine's day drabble requests here ♡

Yoongi reaches for his wallet, cheeks aching from hours spent laughing.

He’s glad he did this—took a chance, asked you out properly. There’s none of the usual awkwardness that comes along with nights out, none of the dread of having to turn someone down, none of the guilt. No, this had gone well. Better than he ever could’ve imagined, and instead of preparing his trademark I had a great time, but… speech, he’s trying to figure out how to ask you out again without being a floundering, incompetent mess.

But then you reach for your wallet, too, and Yoongi—

“What are you doing?” he laughs, aiming for casual.

It works. You laugh softly, quirking an eyebrow. “Getting my card so we can split the bill.”

The words are out of his mouth before his brain can catch up. “What? I can’t let you pay on a—”

Everything comes to a screeching halt. A record-scratch moment. Because he finally figures out what’s going on, sees the way your eyes widen in panic at Yoongi calling this a date. Surely, he’d been clear enough when he asked you to dinner. He had to have been. He distinctly remembers wearing his best shirt into the office that day. He’d even worn the expensive cologne—the one he’d carefully rationed because you’d complimented it before and he didn’t want it to run out before he got a chance to use it properly.

No, he couldn’t have been that dumb. Still—he wracks his brain, tries to remember how he’d worded it, except now he’s in survival mode and everything’s coming up blank. So he does the only thing he can think of—“I can’t let you pay for your birthday dinner.”—and lies.

What a fucking idiot.

“Yoongi,” you say slowly, like you’re talking to the idiot he most definitely is. “My birthday isn’t for another four months.”

The laugh he forces out can only be described as a hellish witch cackle. “I know that,” he insists, “but I just figured why not, you know! Who says you can’t take your friends to birthday dinners four months early?”

You’re nearly stunned into silence. “But this isn’t even our traditional birthday dinner restaurant.”

“I wanted to try something new,” he answers, even though it comes out more like a question. He had wanted to try something new, and look where that’s gotten him. “Hoseok said this place was nice.”

“Yeah, but Hoseok’s been with his partner for eighty years.”

Yoongi’s laugh is pained, now. No more witch cackle, just the dying wheezes of a man running out of excuses and time. One of his favorite things about you is how smart and unwilling to put up with bullshit you are. A week ago, he never would’ve entertained being on the receiving end of it, but now it’s all he can do to tread water. “Oh, really?” he asks, playing stupid. “I didn’t think this place had, like, partner vibes.”

“There’s a little candle on the table,” you deadpan. “There’s a woman in the corner playing a violin. It absolutely has partner vibes.”

“Maybe I just wanted to splurge?”

Your stare is pointed, gaze full of suspicion. “Did you, now.”

There’s a moment where the light breaks through the clouds. Clarity, and Yoongi doesn’t make the same mistake twice. You’re not buying anything he’s selling, so he’s not going to force it. This wasn’t a date for you. He’ll tuck his tail between his legs and take the loss, and it’ll hurt, sure, and it’ll be one of those things that keeps him up at night years into the future, the embarrassment agonizing, but keeping your friendship intact is more important.

So he just sighs. Hands your credit card back to you and ignores your protests. “Of course I did,” he answers. Tries handing the envelope with just his card inside to a passing waiter, but you throw your arm into the aisle to stop him.

“Quit playing with me and tell me what’s going on,” you snap. “You’re being weird and I don’t like it.”

The waiter side-steps your arm and says, “Please unhand me, ma’am.”

(God, Yoongi’s going to have to triple his tip.)

“Shut up, Taehyung, I’m not even touching you.”

(Quadruple it, by the looks of it.)

Taehyung just sighs. “Fuck you, dude. I didn’t bother you the entire time you were on your date, and now you wanna mess with me when I’m just trying to cash out and go home.”

Yoongi says—“Oh, do you know him?”

—at the same time you say, “He’s my broth—what do you mean my date?”

Taehyung looks at you the way you’d looked at Yoongi. “Do you know where you are right now?”

You snap your fingers. “Because it has partner vibes, right?”

“Definitely has partner vibes,” Taehyung agrees. “There’s little candles on the tables.”

You turn to Yoongi. “I told you!” All he can do is shrug. Candles aren’t really his thing, mostly just ambiance, so what does he know.

Taehyung looks between the two of you, clearly running numbers in his head. How to not lose his tip, probably, or maybe envisioning what Yoongi would be like as a brother-in-law. No, wait—

“Okay, I’m gonna go. This is really weird and you’re both very stupid. Bye.”

You roll your eyes. “Yoongi’s just—”

“I literally do not care who my sister is dating! It’s none of my business!” Taehyung calls over his shoulder, much to Yoongi’s horror and the dismay of the rest of the patrons.

Once he’s gone, the two of you sit in awkward silence. He’s surprised you’re sticking around. The night has turned into an absolute shitshow, and Yoongi wouldn’t blame you a bit for leaving, though the fact that you haven’t has him hesitantly optimistic. Maybe he can salvage this, figure out a way to explain the miscommunication in a way that doesn’t sound condescending, because I’m sorry I thought I asked you out properly makes you sound like a dunce who can’t comprehend when they’re being asked out properly.

What a mess.

It’s not until Taehyung returns with his card, he’s tipped 50%, and he’s moving to put on his jacket do you speak. “Was he right?”

“Your brother?” Yoongi asks reflexively. You nod and his palms get all sweaty. “Um. I’m not really sure how to answer that.”

You snort. “Honestly, for a start.”

“I—okay,” he acquiesces. “Maybe not here, though. People are still staring and it’s making me want to throw up.”

The two of you move to his car. He turns it on and lets it idle, turns on your seat warmer and the heat because it’s cold outside and he’s already sweating buckets so what difference does it make. He’s got the anxiety shakes, anyway. And it’s not lost on him that this is new, too. Before, the two of you always met up in the city. Separate cars, separate ways. He’d picked you up tonight. Right at seven, just like he’d said, so he can’t figure out where everything had gone sideways.

“Okay, I’m just gonna—I did think this was a date,” he says. Feels good to get it out there, he supposes, but the way your jaw drops doesn’t make him feel too great.

You snap it shut. “Oh. Okay.”

He picks at his dress pants. He knows the fabric is expensive but not what it is. The salesperson at the store said it was one of their best and the charge on his card confirmed it. He’d bought three-million won pants for a date and he’d managed to fuck it all up. “Yeah. Sorry.”

“For what?”

“Huh? What d’you mean for what. For thinking it was a date when it wasn’t.”

Friendships have survived worse, right? There’s a guy who works with both of you who divorced his wife of ten years and they still go on vacations together all the time, so the two of you are going to be fine. Shit, would Yoongi be able to go to Saint-Tropez with you after a divorce? That’s some heavy shit. That’s almost insane, he thinks. Does he have that kind of maturity? Is it maturity? The guy works in the communications department, so maybe he’s just… good at that? Maybe Yoongi should’ve asked him for some pointers.

“Can I just ask,” you start, and it’s the way you turn in your seat, angling your body towards him, that activates his fight-or-flight. Yoongi’s anxiety is not built for this kind of confrontation. Not at all. “What made you think it was a date?”

“My pants are three-million won,” he blurts out.

“You thought this was a date because… you’re wearing expensive pants?”

He groans. Bonks his head against the steering wheel and nearly has a heart attack when the horn beeps, far too loud for this parking garage. “No, it’s not just the pants. I thought I’d been very clear when I asked you to dinner that it was, like, a date. And then I almost said that and you looked really panicked, like you’d rather be buried alive, so I lied and said it was a birthday dinner even though it obviously wasn’t, and then your brother—and, yeah. I don’t know. Clearly I’m not as good at this as I thought I was.”

“Okay, first of all: yikes.” Yoongi nearly wails. “Secondly: Yoongi, you said you don’t date coworkers! Why the hell would I have thought this was a date?”

“In my defense, I said that a long time ago.”

“And never rescinded it!” you argue back. “Why would I think that’d changed?”

“Well—because!” Your stare is blank. “Because I picked you up—”

“I told you my car is in the shop three days ago—”

“And I’m pretty sure when I asked, I said, do you want to go to dinner with me—”

“Sure,” you concede, “as friends! We always go to dinner together!”

“But…” He sighs, runs his hands down his face. Might as well rip off the bandaid. “My pants.”

“Yoongi, all of your pants are expensive. You make an ungodly amount of money a year.”

“It’s Valentine’s Day?” he tries again.

You groan. “Yeah, and I’m supposed to give you a gift.” You run your hands over your face, and it’s really stupid, Yoongi thinks, because you’re wearing makeup. Did you always wear makeup when the two of you went to dinner? He can’t remember. He knows “no makeup” makeup is a thing, so he’s not all that confident he could tell what is and isn’t makeup, and it hits him for the millionth time this evening how bad he is at this.

“Look,” you continue, “let’s just… go somewhere else.”

“Maybe you should pick, since…” He gestures vaguely at himself.

You nod. “Yeah, good idea. That new ice cream place is close. We could go there.”

Yoongi glances out the window. It’s cold outside. A little gray, too, so it’s probably going to snow, considering it’s the middle of February and it’s been unseasonably cold, even for winter. But it’s not an outright rejection. It’s your idea, and if he dares to think it, the look you’re giving him is hopeful. He’s sure the wires in his brain will overheat and start crackling at the mere thought of you wanting to spend more time with him, so he’s agreeing before he can think twice. If his fucking pants are three-million won, they better keep him warm.

He doesn’t know what to do once you’re out of the car. Does he try to hold your hand? Does he loop his arm through yours? Throw an arm over your shoulders and pull you against his side? He’s already ten steps behind. He’s got a few centimeters on you, but your legs are longer, and it’s a little embarrassing, the hurried waddle he does to catch up. And he must sidle up too close, because your hand brushes against his.

Still warm, even though it’s going to snow. Even though you aren’t wearing gloves. All he can think is that the two of you are on your way to some new ice cream place because you wanted to go there, even though he’s put you through the ringer tonight, so he exchanges his stupidity for bravery. Closes in a little more, smiles when you look up at him and cock an eyebrow.

Because your hand is brushing against his, and he can’t stop himself from taking it.

For the first time all night, he knows it’s the right move when you smile.

[j-nope-not-today]

Don't cry

TMNT Donatello x reader

A/n: I wrote this while crying on the bathroom floor and so I hope someone out there can find the comfort I didn't have by reading this. Sorry if it's sucky i tried my best 🤧

I sit on my bed and it's as if my heart is breaking. I'm hurt. Every thing is going wrong for me. I just want to feel okay again, but instead I am sitting in my room as cold tears that I figured would be warm, slide down my cheeks. All of my problems seem to be consuming me today. And all of the stress I've felt has built and built and here I am. Crying. Even though I promised myself to be strong.

I'm so wrapped up in my emotions I don't take notice to the knock on my window and I startle when it opens.

Donnie pov:

My heart breaks as I spot y/n through the window. I peer into the room and see the tears and instantly begin to open the window. I step inside and y/n startles and looks up at me.

"Hey, what's wrong?" I make my way over to the bed and pull y/n into my arms and it seems that only makes her/him cry more.

I quickly begin to rub her/his arm and wrack my brain for a way to cheer y/n up. Before I can do anything she/he speaks up

"everything is wrong Donnie.."

"I don't know what to do to help, but I'm going to do what I can. I'm not going to pretend to understand your problem, but I'm going to do my best to help make you feel better." I kiss her/his head and decide to just hold y/n tightly to me.

"just know I love you and my heart is breaking for you.." I feel y/n wrap her/his arms around me and I feel bad I don't know how to help.

"we can do anything you want..we can watch movies, we can vandalize something, I can get your favorite snacks.. whatever you need."

I feel y/n's arms wrap tighter around me and I hold her/him impossibly closer to me as she/he whispers

"just hold me.." I nod despite y/n not being able to see and kiss her/his head again

"I'll hold you forever if that's what you need..I love you"

[rroaddkill]

Deja vu, a chucky fanfic told through the perspective of Tiffany Valentine, a reflection of how much her child looks like someone she used to really know well.

I wrote this for @stinkysstuff bc of a headcanon they have.

-

"Deja vu? What a strange feeling, I've never felt it before." Words I shouldn't say, because I have. It gives me anxiety every-time I do, wracks my brain with constant stress and pain. I remember too much, I live in the past. I live in a world where my son and his sister didn't exist and it was still us, he looks so much like you now it's almost like looking into a mirror of all my mistakes, it makes me sick. ill. And i hate being sick, I hate it with every fiber of my mind and body.

 I almost feel a sort of grief? It's like God's constant reminder of what I took away from myself years and years ago over something stupid, oh I remember it so vividly too..in full color, every sound made in that moment, every emotion, everything. My life changed forever…but it was for the better wasn't it? Was it not what gave us the life we have now? Even if we're apart, and I'm all alone with my thoughts. Knowing I can never fix it. I want you back so badly, but I'll never get any of that back. 

I grieve a lot about how much I fucked up, I FUCKED UP! I cheated the kids out of a present father, I cheated myself out of the best relationship and only relationship I've ever had..and for what? Because of something that happened and didn't cause me any physical harm at all? Fucking hell, I hate myself. I'm going to vomit everywhere, vomit my guts out, my blood, my tears can flow with it.

"Mom? You alright there?" A sweet and kind voice called out to me, breaking my intrusive thinking.. "yeah..ah..I'm fine, sorry honey." Glen smiled at me, his smile, his laugh, the way he looked and what he wore..everything brings me back. "I was asking if you liked my outfit, mummy?" The only thing that differs you from him is the slight accent, a slight British accent. I always found it cute, adorable that he holds onto it even though he's in a different body than his doll one, but..I digress, 

his outfit reminds me of you, fashionable like you were too, a black trenchcoat with a grey tweed material, I could've swore it was the exact one you had..a white sweater and dark purple plaid pants, his shoes being doc marten boots..oh he looks so much like you.. I miss you.

"Yeah, sweetface..you look great." I smiled lovingly at him, I knew that when him and Glenda left, whenever that'd be..I would end up going upstairs, reminiscing and sobbing my heart out, and god I hope I don't puke.

Come back to me, in a dream, or when I'm dead and decaying.

Come back to me, I won't rest comfortably until you do.

Even if it means death, I'll find my way back to you piece by piece.

Till death do us part, 

Remember?

[septembersghost]

what songs from present day would you want to hear elvis cover?

ANON!!! 🥰💕 i love this message an enormous amount, and then it tormented me for two days because i read it and instantly forgot every modern day song i've ever listened to somehow lol. the actual problem was, i felt like i didn't have a solid enough handle on today's genres that he might lean more towards or that would do him justice? i was sitting here frantically thinking of songs by pop girlies™ and i could hear him softly laughing over my shoulder. so i was going to give you a short answer.

then i ended up looking at my actual music library and came out with a novel.

first, i sent this to both my loves @joons and @headfullofpresley in my initial dilemma, looking for suggestions. sidenote: if anyone would like to add to this, you're welcome to!

chelsea gave me three that i think are simply marvelous and i will weep forever that we cannot have them: million reasons by lady gaga (the taste this has, the vision this has. I bow down to pray, I try to make the worst seem better, Lord, show me the way to cut through all this worn out leather. I've got a hundred million reasons to walk away, but baby, I just need one good one to stay. hello?!), praying by kesha (well, you almost had me fooled, told me that I was nothing without you, but after everything you've done, I can thank you for how strong I have become, 'cause you brought the flames and you put me through hell, I had to learn how to fight for myself, and we both know all the truth I could tell, I'll just say this is "I wish you farewell." I hope you're somewhere prayin'...I don't need you, I found a strength I've never known, I'll bring thunder, I'll bring rain, oh, when I'm finished, they won't even know your name...can you imagine how much i would cry?), and love on the brain by rihanna (baby, I'm fist fighting with fire just to get close to you, can we burn something, babe? and I run for miles just to get a taste. i NEED to hear how he would arrange this).

tam i know would say peace (there's robbers to the east, clowns to the west, I'd give you my sunshine, give you my best, but the rain is always gonna come, if you're standin' with me) by taylor. also slow dancing in a burning room (this is the deep and dying breath of this love that we've been working on. can't seem to hold you like I want to, so I can feel you in my arms, nobody's gonna come and save you, we pulled too many false alarms) and shadow days (did you know that you could be wrong, and swear you're right? some people been known to do it all their lives. but you find yourself alone, just like you found yourself before, like I found myself in pieces on the hotel floor. hard times help me see, I'm a good man with a good heart, had a tough time, got a rough start, but I finally learned to let it go...).

for my part, i feel like there is this endless list of songs i could mention from further back in time, but i wanted to pull from our modern era since you said present day, and i've been mulling some of my favorites in my mind. granted, elvis would play around with how these are crafted and produced, but in my head, i can hear these.

taylor is such an obvious go-to, and i wracked my brain trying to think of what would be right for him. something with her country flavor, or something with a bigger sound, a more rock-infused sound, like state of grace (PLEASE), like the story of us. but these jumped out - the original version of that's when. i love the duet with keith urban, but the original can be carried by one person. i can't explain, but it's very kentucky rain-coded to me. also just the story there, that idea that all these mistakes have been made, but the person you love is always welcome to come back. there's also an unreleased song of hers called just south of knowing why (drive all night) that is SO GOOD, and i hope it'll be on debut tv. for some reason i can connect it with him easily. "if I could drive all night, would I find my peace of mind? would it be a million miles of cold white lies and unfamiliar exit signs? I just drive on by, just south of knowing why. I don't have a plan, I don't have a map, I don't even know if I'm ever going back." lastly, and this is the biggest one, i toyed with a bunch of folklore choices (this is me trying...they told me all of my cages were mental...), but my brain just kept circling back to fearless, specifically to change. this is curious because i never used to like change, it's the re-recording that, well, changed it for me. the initial letdown of it (the final blow hits you, somebody else gets what you wanted again, and you know it's all the same, another time and place, repeating history and you're getting sick of it), and then the hopeful triumph overcoming it (but I believe in everything you do). the spirit of it - and we'll sing hallelujah! anyway i cried thinking about this so that tells you everything.

to the lady gaga connection, can i say that el would sound phenomenal singing any number of the songs from she and bradley's version of a star is born? always remember us this way. alibi. music to my eyes (i know it's a duet!). and especially maybe it's time.

harry's version of just a little bit of your heart where he made it rockier (I know I'm not your only, but at least I'm one, I heard a little love is better than none). canyon moon, you just have to trust me.

and it hit me, LITERALLY ANYTHING by lord huron?! there's an entire playlist of elvis-as-lord-huron songs that i could make, but if i can only choose one, i'm going to say the man who lives forever. (ends of the earth? time to run? love like ghosts? the night we met? louisa? wait by the river? love me like you used to?) also he'd make fool for love really fun.

miscellaneous choices i adore from my library that i know he'd transform amazingly: green eyes and a heart of gold by the lone bellow, in the light by the lumineers, let's be still by the head and the heart, morning comes by delta rae, ghost towns by radical face, the weight of love by snow patrol, all of me by john legend, river by josh groban, you and me by niall horan (time's never been on our side, so would you wait for me?). wait for it (death doesn't discriminate between the sinners and the saints, it takes and it takes and it takes, and we keep living anyway, we rise and we fall and we break and we make our mistakes, and if there's a reason I'm still alive...). breathe by la'porsha renae (I swear I pray every day, but still nothing's changing, feels like my life might need rearranging. you say that you're here and right now is a test of faith. so open up my heart and have your way, I'm sinkin' in my thoughts, so pull me from the waves, my head's above the water, you're my sweet escape. I need you just so I can breathe).

songs that are absolutely bonkers to choose, but i know how they could be re-worked somehow, i can HEAR it i just can't psychically share it with you: miley's never be me, aly & aj's symptom of your touch, hallelujah by alicia keys, someone new by hozier, graveyard (acoustic) by halsey (they say I may be making a mistake, I would've followed all the way, no matter how far. I know when you go down all your darkest roads, I would've followed all the way to the graveyard), golden by fall out boy (and I saw God cry in the reflection of my enemies, and all the lovers with no time for me...i like to cry idk), and simply because it tickles me as she is a huge fan, lana's get free. there are couple of lyrics in it that i question how he'd feel about, but this is modern elvis, i can open him up a little. here's why i couldn't help but choose this, in the end: there's no more chasing rainbows and hoping for an end to them, their arches are illusions, solid at first glance, but then you try to touch them, there's nothing to hold on to, the colors used to lure you in and put you in a trance. sometimes it feels like I've got a war in my mind, I wanna get off, but I keep riding the ride, I never really noticed that I had to decide to play someone's game, or live my own life. and now I do, I wanna move, out of the black, into the blue.

i could honestly go on forever, but have one last song, and it's an oldie (probably a cliche, but i do not care!), and that is landslide by fleetwood mac. considering how i feel about e's cover of bridge over troubled water, i think if i could hear him sing landslide i might be fixed forever (or shattered, but still healed somehow). picture this with me: I took my love, I took it down, climbed a mountain and I turned around, and I saw my reflection in the snow covered hills 'til the landslide brought me down. oh, mirror in the sky, what is love? can the child within my heart rise above? can I sail through the changin' ocean tides? can I handle the seasons of my life? well, I've been 'fraid of changin' 'cause I've built my life around you, but time makes you bolder, even children get older, and I'm gettin' older, too. it would be beyond beautiful.

honestly, for anyone reading, if you don't understand what i'm talking about in regards to the way he transformed and brought the incandescent soul out of songs, i just...please listen to this. my entire heart forever.

[fluffydavey]

Have you ever stagedoored and met the cast? Do you have any tips?

i've been really lucky to stagedoor a few times and get to meet some of the cast who are all very lovely!

i would say:

most importantly, respect the actors who don't want to stagedoor. some will be across the street talking to people they know, or some will run out so they can grab some food if it's after a matinee, or some will be rushing to get home after an evening show, and i think it's really important that we respect their boundaries? i understand feeling disappointed that someone you wanted to meet and talk to isn't stagedooring that day, but be mindful that they just may not be feeling it that particular day? it's a really demanding show, and i think we should be very grateful for the people who do come out and say hi!

also note - the last time i went a lot of the actors just walked straight past us because they were clearly on their way to do something, and i think it's very important to know it's nothing personal, and they probably would stop and talk to you if they could!

the cast are very sweet, they'll take time to speak with you and thank you for coming (especially matthew, who will have full-blown conversations with people at stagedoor and will take his time to talk to people, see how they liked the show, try make them feel comfortable. we love matthew so much)

i really understand the feelings of anxiety at the idea of stagedooring by yourself, but if that's the only thing stopping you, i think you should still try if you're feeling able to! i've made friends with other fans when trying to stagedoor by myself and we've helped each other with photos and chatted while waiting for others to come out! granted this doesn't happen all the time, but i think as a fandom newsies fans are pretty chill and i don't think i've ever made as many friends through a show than newsies and i'll forever be grateful for it, and the people it's brought into my life! newsies really are forever 😭❤️

have fun!! i know it's nerve-wracking seeing the people that you really admire, especially comfort characters, but it's an incredible experience!! and you can tell it means just as much to the cast when they see people repping the tshirtsies or listening to you talk about why their character/acting choices mean so much to you. i think it's a really special experience for everyone involved!

as much as i would love to have the artistic or creative skills to come up with presents for the cast, i'm very bad at arts and crafts and do not have the brain to come up with the amazing things i've seen others bring to the show. i am in awe of every single one of you. but!! if you’ve made presents for the entire cast, the actors who do go out are more than happy to collect the gifts that were made for people who don’t stagedoor and they’ll be able to receive them that way!

i’m repeating myself but most importantly have fun!! take lots of pictures, talk to as many cast members who are out stagedooring and try talk to other fans! make the most out of this amazing experience you’ll have! ❤️

[emeraldhazeart]

Thank you for the tag @friendofbats!

Sorry it's taken me so long - I really struggled to find 4 ships 😅

The Rules: Tag (9) people you want to know better and/or catch up with, then answer the following:

Four Ships

In no particular order

1. The Titanic (1912)

2. The Millennium Falcon (Star Wars)

3. The Ever Given (Suez Canal March 2021)

4. The USS Enterprise NCC-1701 (Star Trek)

...

...

...

OK, OK, not that kind of ship. Gotcha.

For real though, this was kinda hard because I'm not a big shipper. I tend to just go along with the default canon ships. Don't get me wrong, I like a lot of ships, but I had to really wrack my brain to find four I love.

1. Female Shepherd x Garrus Vakarian (Mass Effect trilogy)

I was not expecting to feel so strongly about this ship, but after recently replaying the ME trilogy and romancing Garrus this time, I was blown away by the chemistry between him and FemShep. The voice actors do a phenomenal job anyway, but they really brought their 'A' game to this relationship. It made the ending all the more bittersweet for me, knowing how ME3 closes out...I just want these 2 to be together forever, dangit!

NB: I know the player chooses Shepherd's appearance and how they respond to certain situations, but I still see Shepherd as a defined character, rather than an OC/self insert.

2. Nina x Galen (Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life)

Does it still count as a "ship" if they've already been married for decades when we meet them? Eh, I'm counting it.

When I think of OTPs, I think of characters I can't imagine with anyone else. That defines Nina/Galen for me. They clearly mean the world to each other.

3. Fox x Vixen (Animals of Farthing Wood)

I've spoken before about how the AoFW cartoon was my childhood. Well, these 2 were my OG ship. I can't think of Two characters more meant to be together.

Even the narrative (in the books, at least) calls out how unusual their bond is, with the two choosing, unlike other foxes, to stay together long after their cubs are grown up. I love the way they respect and admire each other, how there's never even any question of anyone else for either of them, and how, even when times are tough, they never turn their frustrations on each other.

4. Robin x Starfire (Teen Titans 2003)

I've always enjoyed 'Friends to Lovers' stories - Which makes a lot of sense since I realised I'm demisexual 😅 My favourites are the stories where they've been friends for a long time, before something shifts and they finally realise they see each other as more than friends.

I think that's part of the reason I resonate so much with this ship.

Last Song: Eyes Closed by Ed Sheeran

Currently Reading: Shadow by Michael Morpurgo

Last Movie:��um... I really can't remember what my last movie was. It's been that long since I consciously sat down to watch a film

Craving: it's a cliché, but: milk chocolate. 😅🍫

No pressure tags: @sneakyfox55 @lizzie-tempest @hannahcbrown @acustardduckling @harvestpokerune @devaneiosblues and anyone else who'd like to have a go 🙂

[fruitysalamander1398]

15, 17 and/or 29 for the fic writer's ask game :) ?

15. how do you come up with titles for your fics?

i usually use song titles or song lyrics and sometimes the title takes me 2 seconds to come up with while other times it takes forever to find something that feels fitting. i also use quotes or concepts from the source material for some of them.

17. what's something you've learned a lot about while researching for a fic?

the local flowers and birds from pennsylvania come up in almost every deer hunter fic i've written and as i do not live there i've tried to make sure they're accurate species or varieties to feature. i know a lot about flower language already so i try to incorporate my knowledge of flower language with the things i've learned while looking into this. that way, i can combine new knowledge with stuff i already know the find what i think are the perfect details to use in a scene.

29. share a bit from a fic you'll never post or a scene that got cut from an already posted fic

so like i wrote parts of a deer hunter western au awhile ago and i don't think it'll ever get posted bc i'm really not that knowledgeable about westerns and i probably got a ton of things wrong / there are people other than me who would do this better. but i will share a little here now:

Nick wracks his brain for any scraps from the past several days, coming up with almost nothing. He knew the whole time, and this is the one thing he is certain of, that Mike had always remained beside him. He had never forgotten that.

It’s after midnight when Nick turns to Mike, who is drifting off. He doesn't want to startle Mike from what must be one of the first times he’s really let himself rest in a while, but he has to say what's on his mind. “Hey,” he whispers. “I just wanna say. I do want to go home. I always did. I just didn't think I was good enough anymore.” Nick snuggles closer to him. “Like, like I was bad forever. Corrupted. Ruined.”

“I don't care if you are ruined. You're not, but I don't care if you are. I love you ruined. I love you every way.” Mike kisses him right on the lips, holding the back of his head. Nick eagerly responds and sinks into the soft touch.

“I promise I’ll tell you everything,” Nick says between kisses. “I promise when I can I will.” He lets Mike hold onto him fiercely and they kiss for a while longer until they're both too tired to do anything but lay in one another’s arms.

[poseidont-even]

I did @lurkinglurkerwholurks's fic writer questionnaire and i'm trying not to feel presumptuous about it!

THE BASICS

Name(s): JenicaKing on ao3

Where do you post fic? ao3

Primary/current fic writing fandom: uhhhhh the wip that's open is DC specifically Nightwing/Teen Titans

Secondary/past/rotating fic writing fandoms: Arcane, Dex Hamilton, Tintin, Star Wars, more general Batman stuff

Are there fandoms you write for but don’t read, or vice versa? no, but i'm not really reading anything fanwork wise atm

THE STATS

How long have you been writing fics? over a decade technically

How many have you written? i genuinely do not know.

How many have you posted (complete or incomplete)? 14 on ao3 and i had 4 on ff.net that i hope are lost to digital decay lowkey

What’s your word count by year? good gods i wouldn't know how to calculate that

What was your first posted fic? on ao3? Red-headed Orphans (A Tintin oneshot inspired by an old @edorazzi post -check out her Tintin stuffffff-), on ff.net i can't remember

If you write in more than one fandom, which is your most popular? My batman stuff that's all Nightwing focused.

What is your most popular fic by bookmark? Once More With Feeling (Batman/Teen Titans 03 Slade attempts a new apprenticeship deal, also Dick has psychosis)

What is your most popular fic by subscription? the same as above

What is your longest fic? Again, Once More With Feeling with 23,554

How long did it take you to write it? Well it's not finished so... I started it in April 2020 and I swear it isn't abandonded I swear

What is your shortest fic? Twin Suns Shine On Different Twins (Star Wars Twin-swap concept piece) with 392

How long did it take you to write it? Like an afternoon?

How many series do you have? Two though I have plans for a third if I ever publish any of it

Who’s your most commonly tagged character? Dick Grayson

What’s your most commonly tagged relationship (slash or &)? tied for first is Ekko & Viktor (lol) and Ekko & Jayce (lol) both with three

What’s your most commonly used other tag? Don't really have one that isn't just linking a series...

THE EMOTIONS

Was there a fic or writer who inspired you to start writing your own posted works? Beyond inspiring specific works? (endorazzi for Tintin and AplusIsRoman for my Dick-raised-by-Harley fic) not really

What do you remember about writing your first posted fic? (Again focussing on ao3) I Just really wanted edorazzi to see it lol

Is there a fic or fics you’re most proud of, and why? Unbelievable That We Made It Here (DickJoey fic where Dick is in a coma) because I just really like the way it flows even though it's the only thing i have from Joey's perspective

Is there a fic you would redo completely if you could? Eh, not completely. I might go into a couple and put Donna in because I love her but I didn't know that when I started them

Is there a specific detail (setting, interaction, quirk, dialogue) you stole from your own life to use in a fic? nah not really

Is there a line in your fic that makes you smile/snicker/chuckle every time you remember it? not really? No

Is there a line in your fic that makes you sad every time you remember it? yeah actually, this one from Unbelievable: "Would he be here forever, sitting next to the empty shell of his boyfriend wracking his brain to remember what he’d last said. Unable to move on while Dick was still breathing, trapped under the same curse."

Are there any story ideas you’ve considered but are too nervous/intimidated to attempt? What are they? not really, i've got probably half a dozen started fics that just aren't up to a quality where I'll post them but none i'm too nervous for

[claudiajcregg]

I love these! (Doing and asking :) 🙅‍♀️ 🤔 🏅☀️

Grrr. Tumblr ate the mostly written post because of course it did. Thank you for asking, Mia 💕 These were really fun to answer (and also hard). For someone who's really her worst critic, I do enjoy talking about my process and whatnot. I'm sorry in advance for all the rambling.

(If you want to ask me more, the questions are here ✨ )

🙅‍♀️ What is one trope you refuse to ever write?

I just don't see myself doing incest or bestiality. If we're talking more general things, I can't see myself writing cheating (with the asterisk of this being one member of the couple straying, and that there are possible situations where I wouldn't mind). Also, anything extremely violent, mostly because it's not something I often consume in media.

🤔 What’s one genre you’ve never written that you’d like to try?

Oh, maybe action and/or suspense? My writing style (intimate moments, conversations, just vibes) is not the most compatible, but if the situation arose... Sure! (I guess that, in a past life, I wrote around mysteries and crime and whatnot. I was too young then 😬 )

I also would love to be better at writing stories-within-stories. I absolutely do not have the talent to convincingly seem like the talented writers I'm doing. (Once again thinking of the fluffy memoir fic. And another one, which has a super fun premise, but my writing is failing it with this aspect, I fear.)

And not a genre specifically but collaboration? Again, I have super talented friends. I'd stick out like a sore thumb. I think it'd be fun!

🏅 What is the fic you’re most proud of?

I am my own worst critic but I would still probably say all of them, maybe? I saw something in them that I thought might connect with others and that's why they're out there. Even the ones that aren't (so many of them) and might never see the light of day. Writing isn't easy. It makes me nervous and makes me crave validation.

Anyway. The pageant answer is still true but as for actual ones, but using the way I would mentally refer to them, lol.

Big Block of Cheese 2008. I just saw it's at almost 100 kudos... excuse me what. I just felt it was something special from the moment I wrote it. I think I always would've posted it at some point, even if I hadn't made friends. None of my fics come close to it in terms of "love" and tbh, I'm fine with it.

St. Augustine. Just because it came to me so fast (I think it was mostly written in a morning?) and IDK, I love the scene. This one has broken out from most of my other purely CJD stories, whether it was timing or it getting recommended by the right people. It was nerve wracking writing something pre-canon but I think it went well! It was fun to write. I haven't read it in forever so I reserve the right to remove it from the list.

Obviously, star shine started it all but if I had a third spot... Portland. It's probably one of my flops (everything is, but this one especially) and yet. I recall being so proud right after I finished it and wanting people to read it. (It obviously grew since then because I can't shut up.) It's long, maybe unnecessarily so, but god does it get to me. I was in a writing rut (see next answer) and challenged myself to write 'canon' stories, and I think the two are good.

But... To be honest, the answer has to be my unposted multichapter. I always think it's bad until I read it, and it kinda hits, all imperfections aside. 150k words in 5-and-a-bit months (26/3 to 2/9?), 33 chapters. I wrote 2/3 of that in two months (with 19 being the last one I wrote before 19/5), until my muse decided she was done and I decided to actually change jobs. (I also wrote now-published fics like haunted by the notion or don't want you to go, as well as a bunch of other smaller ones, in between! WTF was I on in 2021? I think the mini reunion altered my brain chemistry.) I've considered just dropping a link to the unedited, unbetaed drive on the server one day, ngl.

ANYWAY. Too long-winded!

☀️ Has anyone ever left you a comment that made your day? What did it say?

UM. All of them? real talk here, I don't get many comments so I love them all. I write for a show that ended 17 years ago, for a small (and surprisingly divisive) ship (their loss - there's so much talent) so I should've known going in. It took me some time to internalize it. I'm also not that good a writer, so I'll take it. Comments mean the world to me, even if it's a "lovely" or "great job." Just taking a few seconds means a lot and writers aren't kidding when they say it's motivating. It's also how I've made friends in the fandom so yeah! comments!

To highlight some rather recent ones!

Haunted by the notion got so many from so different people, and they were all so incredibly nice when I was terrified. All of those broke me, and might be the reason why I've been struggling with a followup! (And why I've been wanting to post again soon, rather than wait.) From the other stories, I have two ~recent ones~ I actually bookmarked because they broke me.

miabicicletta's (💕 ) on St. Augustine. I woke up on a Saturday and I remember reading it from bed and crying. It was so incredibly kind and lovely and I couldn't remember the last time anyone had written anything as long. I still think about it all the time. 🥂 (I've now realized Steph also wrote another lovely one ♥️ That story and the love it got, man.)

krazykitkat's on all's well + her comment on St. Augustine because her stories are some of my favorites. I couldn't believe that someone whose work I adored and have read countless times since I finished the show six years ago had read one of my stories, but had liked it???? Didn't compute. Doesn't compute. She's read many since (see St. Augustine, the most recent one), commented and left kudos on a bunch, and it still... blows my mind. (This one happened while I was flying back from Stockholm and was the first thing I saw when I landed.)

But really - so many people have left so many kind messages over the last couple of years, and I've probably gotten emotional at all of them. That there are people out there who are reading the silly little stories that have come out of my brain... wonders never cease.

[strange-ghoul]

im... unwell. read tags

blood dripped down my body from my mouth. I couldn't identify where the pain was coming from, but it was somewhere.

I've thrown up multiple times by now. My body wracked with chills as I laid naked on the bathroom floor. I felt exposed, horrible, disgusting, but there I was. Alive. Somehow.

I crawled my way back to the toilet, throwing up again. The bile got onto my hair and stained my teeth, but I couldn't bring myself to take care of it. I had to get this... bug, out of my system.

The bug being something I didn't understand. It was a feeling in my chest, sinking into my stomach. It was something that began to take over my entire body, all the way to my brain. It made me feel deplorable, it made me feel like my body wasn't mine anymore. The urge to rip aspects of my body off were becoming more and more apparent, where soon I knew impulse control would fail.

Would it be so bad to take a knife to my chest, forever securing the feeling of steel and blood to me? Would it be so bad to take off what has hurt me?

I thought back to the bridge nearby. Maybe it's easier there. Maybe if I fall, I'll be okay. Maybe the darkness would hold me and coddle me, love me until even my memories became dust.

Nobody would be there, and it was night already; does a tree really make sound when it falls, even if nobody was there to hear it?

I crawled back to the side of the bathtub, tears already falling down my face again. Everything on my body felt like it was aching and burning.

How hard was it to be cared for? How hard was it for somebody to reach out to you and hold you? Even if it was metaphorically, even if it was just a writing, why was it so hard to be loved?

I can't feel love the same as others. I don't understand romance, I don't feel it. Neither do I understand human touch.

Was it because I was scarred from it? Was the abuse I endured just enough for me to swear it off wholly?

Or was it just me. Am I aromantic? Asexual? I think so. I have no desire for either, even if I acted that I did.

But did this mean I didn't deserve love?

It sure felt like it.

I took a shaky breath in, coughing out a sob. every tear hurt my head more and more, but I couldn't stop. The cold tiles below me now didn't give me any comfort, only resentment.

I wanted to be loved. I wanted to be held in some type of way. I wanted someone to hold me by the face and tell me they loved me unconditionally, even if I was stuck in a body that wasn't mine.

I need somebody to tell me that everything isn't for nothing. That I am smart, that I am okay, that I am worth more than what teachers, parents, and peers thought of me.

The work I produce from my hands- it's all a lie. I've convinced myself every comment was just a pity party. Who'd look at my creations and genuinely think anything good of it? They all had so many flaws which were irredeemable in my eyes. These people- They were my friends, my family- they just had to be being respectful, there was no way they could feel this way towards anything I wrote. It was wrong.

I don't deserve what I get from those works. I don't deserve the support I get. I don't deserve anything. I feel horrible getting it too- wasn't I supposed to feel prideful when my worked was commented on and loved? So why did I feel a stab of pang, why did I feel like I was never good enough to deserve those words?

Could it all trail back to my self-loathing that had already manifested itself within me?

... i don't know.

I don't feel right in this body of mine. It feels broken and unsustained. I look myself in the mirror and I don't believe it's mine. I can't recognize that face- I don't know who that is. I'm told over and over again it's mine, but it's like I can't compute that.

Perhaps that's why I couldn't understand anyone caring about me beyond the thin layer. Perhaps that's why I couldn't accept compliments about literally anything I've ever done.

... but I'm unsure if this is right.

I just wished I was loved, but I fear even then I'll think it's all pity. As I think everything is. Because, in essence,

Who'd give a shit about me?

My eye lids are heavy; even through the glaring lights of the bathroom was sleep slowly over taking me. I'll wake up tomorrow and regret everything I've ever said and done in regard to my mental health. I'll convince myself all over again that I don't need help and I am simply over dramatic. Tomorrow morning, I'll convince myself I am fine, and nothing will be wrong. And then I'll continue on pushing these thoughts, doubts, and self-hatred aside for another night similar to this one.

I place bets on myself occasionally- will this be the night I'm found dead, or will I hate myself for ever thinking I was anything but a fraud and nuisance?

[splintered-emotions]

Ok so, if you wanna - I've written two Mandis/Beedle ficlets, now so it's your turn. If you want, how about writing a little something from one of the hand holding scenes I sent you yesterday? (So taking one of those as your prompt)

i finally finished it! i hope you like it

He was back. A small part of her that had been worrying calmed at the sight of him looking at some of the arrows she had on display. As he grabbed a few bunches as well as two towels that she had made a few days ago, she wracked her brain, trying to remember the prices she had given him last month.

The ones for other customers were written down on a cheat sheet near her elbow, but for him, there were lowered prices. Not enough to be obvious, but enough for him to keep coming back as often as possible. After all, it wasn’t like there weren’t a dozen stores on the island that sold the things that Beedle needed.

As she watched him walk up to her with his handful of items, she finally recalled the price of the towels. Mandis was about to begin her normal script, when he said, “Did you know that apparently there’s a store on this island which sells marked down prices to certain customers?”

Oh no. He had figured it out. “No, where’d you hear that?” She asked as all thoughts of pricing went out of her head.

“Some of the townspeople were discussing a merchant and her paramour as well as how little he had to pay for goods from her. If I was the lover of a merchant, I would ask that they not decrease the price for me in order to continue their source of income, but I suppose that’s just me.”

She breathed out a sigh of relief before stating, “I’d be the same. I couldn’t let them lose money because of me.” Even if I was already doing that for you, she thought.

“Well then, in order for you to not lose any, what must I pay you today for your goods?”

“I believe your total is,” She stopped for a second, trying to wrack her brain for the price of the arrows, before continuing, “50 rupees.”

“That seems even lower than last time!” he exclaimed. “Is trade doing well around here? I can’t have my favorite merchant going out of business.”

His descriptor of her brought a flash of heat to her cheeks, and she quickly replied, “It’s fine,” before he could notice anything was off. “I think the prices are the same. Your memory may perhaps be the problem.”

She tried to find something to package it with, knowing that there was nothing behind the table beyond rupees of every color. The chance of making him stay for longer was far too tempting than forcing herself to find a nonexistent container.

But this moment was not meant to last forever. She stood up straight for the first time in a couple minutes, her back already complaining at the strain that she had put on it, before stating, “It seems that there’s nothing that I can give you to package your items with.”

There was a hint of reluctance as she collected the proffered rupees. It was unclear to Mandis whether it was just her wishful thinking or that perhaps Beedle may feel the same way about her. She brushed it off and quickly stashed the rupees. There was no use dwelling on this matter for now. After all, he had only come here for supplies before he set back out again.

As she gave him back his purchases, there was a moment, just a single moment, when their hands brushed past each other. It didn’t even properly register in her mind until he had taken the towels and arrows, but during that barely even a second action, it seemed as if time had stopped.

The slight warmth from his slightly calloused fingers, the roughness caused by weeks on end spent on his shop ship, and the possibly nonexistent spark of something that she felt were all that she could think about.

He stopped for a second after that simple touch, seemingly about to say something. There was a moment of tension, thick enough that even the sharpest of knifes wouldn’t have been able to make a dent in it, when he just took a breath before saying, “Have a wonderful day!” in that stereotypical customer service voice.

That knocked all of the wind and hope out of Mandis as she replied, “Thanks, you too!” It seems that this wouldn’t be the time that anything would happen. Perhaps it never would.

[remade-stopframevevo]

idk if i've asked you this before buuuut do you have any ocs you want to talk about? doesn't have to be a wc oc :0

okay ive been saving this ask for when i have a grasp on how i wanna answer it and who with and Now is the time. also i dont have any ocs other than my warriors ones and my fursona so this is all you get lawl

this is hopeheart (she/her molly, full name hopeheart marigold), shes a groveclan warrior(? shes probably a warrior +hunter because she likes hitting things but for context i have different roles for jobs that require physical labor eg hunting, den construction, battles. you get the idea). i deprived her of her signature groveclan flowers in this pic because ive been awake for a number of hours and just drew this pic for the sake of the ask

the rests under the read more cuz this got really long

she has two sisters, hickorybranch and leopardbelly. she’s also rainwatcher’s (groveclan deputy) adoptive sister in that she adopted rainwatcher when he was a baby (moreso that fawnstar passed rainkit onto hopes mother after banishing rains biological mother, noticed hopes mother didnt particularly care for him, adopted rainwatcher themself, but hopepaw decided to keep him much to the dismay of her mother and sisters).

hopeheart is actually half-floodclan (i havent thought about who the other parent is but its not particularly important anyways) which is very obvious to Everyone by how shes built. groveclan cats are commonly built like how windclan cats are in canon, while floodclan cats are built like fucking walls to compensate for their territory. her sisters got luckier than her and took after their groveclan mother but hopeheart got....herself...we still love her though its okay 💕.. hopeheart is literally built different

additionally, hopeheart was given her prefix by her mother in a “maybe this is a good thing. maybe this isnt so bad and maybe in fact this child will make things better” way wrt the floodclan thing. everyone thinks songbird caused some kind of curse by naming hopeheart like this, because since gaining sentience hopeheart has done the exact opposite. hopeheart is very snappy, very irritable, and very loud in a “everyone knows shes coming even when shes 20ft away” sense. shes not an angry person by any means and doesnt act out because she feels like it or wants to be mean or whatever, but moreso out of a strong dissatisfaction with clan life to a literally depressive extent. she cant understand why a bunch of rules made up by a bunch of stupid dead people years and years and years ago are so important. nonetheless, shes very headstrong about her opinions and views to an almost unintentionally irritating extent. she actually tried to run for deputy when the opportunity arose (more for a desperate want for a change of scenery than actual desire to become leader) but lost almost immediately.

she’s not necessarily unpopular in her clan, she’s well-liked and definitely not a bad person; she’s very loyal and cares VERY deeply about her loved ones - but her lack of respect for authority and the code, and her depressive states, can be frustating for others because of a lack of understanding of how to help her or how to “deal with” her.

speaking of a lack of respect for the code: she’s been indefinitely banned from gatherings for getting caught with her thornclan girlfriend, honeyblossom (they/she nonbinary, i already posted a pic of her like 3 days ago so i wont repost it). a good majority of groveclan residents were already aware of the situation (with mixed opinions; towards her and towards fawnstar for just actively letting it happen) although the relationship had been kept from thornclan as much as possible, with fawnstar going as far as to make excuses for them, because thornclan is a horrible fucking place to live and everyone who lives there wishes the punishment for breaking the code was just something normal and easy like public execution. that being said, at some point hopeheart and honeyblossom got a little TOO public about it during a gathering (which admittedly was likely hopehearts doing, honeyblossom is far too anxious and scared to ever initiate anything even if the only thing watching is a bird), catching the attention of swanstar, thornclans leader. fawnstar and hopeheart were able to effectively defuse the situation and brush it off as “oh theyre just friends. its fine dont worry” but the second the gathering was over fawnstar immediately barred hopeheart from attending a gathering for the foreseen future, for her own sake and honeyblossoms, in his words. feel like it goes without saying that this mixed with the “fuck the code” attitude she has, hopeheart is in fact not fawnstars biggest fan (not to imply fawnstar gives a shit about the code at all either, but theres like a specific level of feeling betrayed wrt that fact that hopeheart goes through)

and to use my “speaking of” transition again, speaking of fawnstar haters; shes close with one of the medicine cats of groveclan, marbleheart (they/them, nonbinary), who she has a vague adoptive familial relationship with. im also using this as an opportunity to show what i mean when i say “hopeheart looks very different from other groveclan cats”

quick marbleheart facts time: marbleheart hates fawnstar for reasons undisclosed, mostly in a “scared animal backed into a corner that chooses fight” way but also a years-long growing resentment way. marbleheart has virtually no family left (still deciding whether i want to keep their niece an existing character or not but anyway) given the brother that left years ago and the two dead mothers. hopeheart is the closest they have to a living family.

they arent particularly fond of hopehearts relationship with honey but theyre not confrontational about it, theyre more apathetic than a lot of other cats are. they’re also a lot more empathetic towards hopeheart’s state of mind than a lot of other groveclan residents, despite the completely different personalities and clashing views toward the code. although marbleheart accepts the code and almost enjoys it as a way of structure and guidance in life, they can very easily empathise with how hopeheart views it as a kind of cage and does their best to support her when she needs it.

oh also marbleheart and hopeheart having the same suffix was completely accidental but also i think its cute considering their relationship lol

..........................*deep heaving sigh* but anyway i think thats all i have on her right now. like i know theres more and i could expand on more about her and her other relationships but im kind of worn out talking about hopeheart, and marbleheart was the last thing i had in mind to talk about, and i dont really feel like wracking my brain trying to think of more things to bring up. like now i say it i am thinking of other things but ill save it for now. thank you for the ask i could talk forever but this post is already long lawl

oh also shes a trans lesbian lol

[averagedoctor]

heck I love the fact that you're gonna make a romance fic! but I can't think of any good ideas my only idea might not appeal to some of your followers, but I've been craving a fic where the reader and the doc have a relationship going on and the readers been kinda depressed lately cause of their identity and comes out to the doc as trans* and he says "I'll always love you no matter your gender" but idk if you'd be cool with that so it's your choice overall ps love your use of neutral pronouns!

I am so sorry for taking forever to get to this!!!!!! I hope you like it!!!

11th doctor x (trans)reader

Pronouns: gender neutral

Word count: 1,320

TWs: dysphoria

Tagging: @evyiione

Summary: You have been struggling more or less quietly with your identity for a while and it finally comes to fruition

A/N: Prefacing with that I’m trans so don’t come for me thanks

Identity

Sighing, you looked in the mirror, examining every part of your body. None of it looked right. Not your face, not your torso, or around your legs, and  the leist goes on. It all looked wrong. Constantly wrong. You’d done your research a long time ago so you knew you were transgender, but you never felt comfortable with coming out. You weren’t prepared for all the potential loss and things that could go wrong by you wanting to be who you really are. You especially didn’t want to lose him.

As if on cue, you heard his voice calling down the hall, getting louder the closer he got. Hastily, you pulled your clothes back on, straightening them out.

“Love?” He asked, voice muffled outside the door.

“Just a moment!” You responded, twisting your head towards the door to reply. You heard the Doctor stall for a moment before twisting the knob to come in. He smiled brightly at you, crossing over to where you were at the mirror. He wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you close. Your head tipped back to lean on his shoulder.

“Whatcha looking at?” He asked playfully, eyes dancing as he watched the two of you in the mirror.

“Trying on some new clothes I found. I just finished up putting them away.” You stroked his arm, smiling through your lie.

“Oooh,” his eyes sparkled, “you’ll have to show me sometime.” He winked, kissing your forehead.

“It’s only sweatshirts, nothing special.” You deflected, your cheeks heating up.

“I don’t care if it’s not special, I only care that you’re the one wearing it.” He quipped, giving you a grin. You simply shook your head in response and turned around in his arms, giving him a quick peck on the lips.

“Mmm, how sweet of you.” You murmured, basking in the warmth of his arms, and laid your head on his chest.

“What would you like to do today?” He asked, resting his head on top of yours.

“Could we stay in?” You brought up tentatively, knowing how strong his need for adventure was.

“I thought you loved going out.” He pouted, the both of you rearranging so you could look each other in the eyes.

“Just… not feeling it.” You confessed, shrugging. His eyes dimmed of their light, but softened. It was you, it wasn’t like he was going to be mad.

“Then staying in is just fine, dear.” He gave you a smile, placing a hand on your face. Leaning in, he kissed you softly before pulling away. “I better go check the console wires, she hasn’t been too happy about them recently.” He said cheerfully after a beat. “I’ll find you when I’m done.” You gave him a pressed smile and lifted a hand in goodbye as he closed the door.

As soon as that door closed, you looked back in the mirror and felt tears come to your eyes. Unceremoniously, you collapsed into a heap on the group, quiet sobs rolling through your body. You wished that you could tell him already. It would make things so much better if you weren’t too much of a wimp, but you couldn’t bring yourself to. Not yet at least.

You took a deep breath in through your nose and collected yourself as best you could. You rubbed at your eyes, checking how bad they were in that dreaded mirror. A little puffy around the edges, but if you waited for a short while it would go down soon. With weak limbs, you made your way to your bed and flopped down, staring at the wall as thoughts swirled through your mind of a toxic list of everything you despised about yourself and wished so badly you hadn’t born the way you had been. Everything would have been so much better if you were the right gender. God, why did the universe hate you so much as to put this fate upon you. Life wasn’t fair and it seemed supremely unfair to you, in your opinion. The world blurred before your eyes and soon enough you were lost in your mind.

Tools clanking in the background that could even drag you a tiny bit from your fugue state. That should have been the first red flag, but nothing outside mattered to you. The triumphant whoop of the Doctor completing his work should have been the next. Approaching footsteps a third. Turning doorknob a forth. His confused and concerned murmur from right by your bedside the biggest of them all. Yet, you couldn’t be moved.

“Y/N?” He whispered quietly, crouching down to see your face. You remained catatonic for a short minute before he came into focus. Letting out a yelp of surprise, you flinched back.

“Oh!” You gasped, rubbing your head. You hadn’t noticed how long or how deeply you had been thinking.

“I’m sorry.” He winced, rushing to clamber onto the bed next to you. The Doctor gently stroked your hand as you gave him a weak smile. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, you just spooked me.” You deflected, giving a joyless laugh. His eyes narrowed at your response. You were never good at hiding your feelings when truly confronted about them and your heart beat in worry. You pulled your hand away, nervously playing with your fingers.

“What’s wrong? I’m here for you, whatever you need.” He pleaded with you, eyes drifting to your yanked away hand, hurt pooling in his eyes. Your stomach was in your throat. You knew that you should but the words were stuck in your throat.

“I– um…” You swallowed, looking away from him. It was unfair how hard this was. He was your partner, you should be able to tell him everything. You mentally kicked yourself for being unable to get the words out of your mouth. It was like you had filled your mouth with concrete, a hard slab prompting your throat shut. Your mouth twitched to the side as you tried to pull in a deep breath from your nose.

“Please.” The Doctor begged with a simple word. His eyes bore into you, wanting so desperately to make everything alright.

I’m transgender.

The words whispered in your head. At least you thought they did

As you looked over, all you saw was stunned silence. The Doctor was still, deadly still, looking at you with different eyes. Confusion wracked your brain for a moment before you realized what you had said. Your eyes widened in fear and you backed up into the head of your bed. Oh god, oh god, oh god, what had you done? A hand fluttered to your mouth and tears welled in your eyes, a panic attack rising in your chest. Your mouth tried to form words but not even noises came out. You could tell that his mind was processing everything you had said. You knew it was a lot to take in but you still jumped to the worst possible conclusions so the words that ended up tumbling out of his mouth shocked you even further than your slip of the tongue.

“I’ll always love you, no matter what.” The Doctor stated with such genuineness that you felt your breath get taken away.

“But… but.” You gasped out, hands shaking. He pulled you towards him, both hands on your face, caressing you. His touch soothed you. It always did.

“But nothing. I will always love you. Nothing will change that.” He leaned forward so your foreheads were touching. “I will do everything I can to make you comfortable. We’ll find the best doctor in the universe to make you comfortable in your body. I am here for you every step of the way.” You gave him a watery smile, placing one of your own hands on his cheek.

“I love you.” You whispered quietly, just as much a promise as it was the truth.

“I love you, too.”

[hamsterclaw]

hii so i just discovered your writing last night and i've since been wracking my brain on how best to tell you how much i love and adore your writing style and your stories. you're one of the best writers i've come across and even though i've only read 3-4 stories so far i am FULLY convinced. the way you convey such unique and complex angsty story lines that somehow feel super relatable and like real life? Virtuoso in particular pulled at my heart strings at all the right places. i could re read that story forever. okay sorry for absolutely pouring my heart but i just want to tell you i'm your newest and biggest fan and i'm cheering you on your writing journey from here on! cannot wait to get to your other stories <3

Oh my word. How lovely is this? What an amazing message to read. I am so grateful that you've enjoyed reading my stories, and I need to tell you that hearing comments like this absolutely makes the fear of putting my writing out there worthwhile. You've made my day, and probably my week as well. Thank you for taking the time to tell me your thoughts, I can't say enough how appreciated it is ❤️. I feel like I have a lot to live up to!

Also, I love that you loved Virtuoso - I love that couple (and Yoongi!) so much.