#I've read so many ideas from people on this site that were thousands times more interesting that this

[nowoyas]

Trying to make sense of the Nanowrimo statement to the best of my abilities and fuck, man. It's hard.

It's hard because it seems to me that, first and foremost, the organization itself has forgotten the fucking point.

Nanowrimo was never about the words themselves. It was never about having fifty thousand marketable words to sell to publishing companies and then to the masses. It was a challenge, and it was hard, and it is hard, and it's supposed to be. The point is that it's hard. It's hard to sit down and carve out time and create a world and create characters and turn these things into a coherent plot with themes and emotional impact and an ending that's satisfying. It's hard to go back and make changes and edit those into something likable, something that feels worth reading. It's hard to find a beautifully-written scene in your document and have to make the decision that it's beautiful but it doesn't work in the broader context. It's fucking hard.

Writing and editing are skills. You build them and you hone them. Writing the way the challenge initially encouraged--don't listen to that voice in your head that's nitpicking every word on the page, put off the criticism for a later date, for now just let go and get your thoughts out--is even a different skill from writing in general. Some people don't particularly care about refining that skill to some end goal or another, and simply want to play. Some people sit down and try to improve and improve and improve because that is meaningful to them. Some are in a weird in-between where they don't really know what they want, and some have always liked the idea of writing and wanted a place to start. The challenge was a good place for this--sit down, put your butt in a chair, open a blank document, and by the end of the month, try to put fifty thousand words in that document.

How does it make you feel to try? Your wrists ache and you don't feel like any of the words were any good, but didn't you learn something about the process? Re-reading it, don't you think it sounds better if you swap these two sentences, if you replace this word, if you take out this comma? Maybe you didn't hit 50k words. Maybe you only wrote 10k. But isn't it cool, that you wrote ten thousand words? Doesn't it feel nice that you did something? We can try again. We can keep getting better, or just throwing ourselves into it for fun or whatever, and we can do it again and again.

I guess I don't completely know where I'm going with this post. If you've followed me or many tumblr users for any amount of time, you've probably already heard a thousand times about how generative AI hurts the environment so many of us have been so desperately trying to save, about how generative AI is again and again used to exploit big authors, little authors, up-and-coming authors, first time authors, people posting on Ao3 as a hobby, people self-publishing e-books on Amazon, traditionally published authors, and everyone in between. You've probably seen the statements from developers of these "tools", things like how being required to obtain permission for everything in the database used to train the language model would destroy the tool entirely. You've seen posts about new AI tools scraping Ao3 so they can make money off someone else's hobby and putting the legality of the site itself at risk. For an organization that used to dedicate itself to making writing more accessible for people and for creating a community of writers, Nanowrimo has spent the past several years systematically cracking that community to bits, and now, it's made an official statement claiming that the exploitation of writers in its community is okay, because otherwise, someone might find it too hard to complete a challenge that's meant to be hard to begin with.

I couldn't thank Nanowrimo enough for what it did for me when I started out. I don't know how to find community in the same way. But you can bet that I've deleted my account, and I'll be finding my own path forward without it. Thanks for the fucking memories, I guess.

[rintarie]

on second thought, I'm not really happy with the backgrounds we'll get... maybe I'm just ranting but all of them seem to describe the same picture - a noble, lawful good character, ready to risk it all for the sake of whatever. which is alright, I guess - I usually can't bring myself to be mean to NPC or make really cruel game choices, but it's so limiting!

yes, we know rook is here to save the day, that's why varric chooses them, but it bothers me how the only thing we get from any of the backgrounds is this burning desire to save the wronged ones at any costs which makes even the crow rook look like a saint. it makes them all feel the same

I don't know what my point is, i just hope we'll be able to have someone other than a superman

not my delusional ass sitting here with my rook's planned backstory realising nothing of it will happen now 😫

[cookinguptales]

I almost wrote a small essay in the tags of that "fanwork as content" post but realized that it would probably be better off as its own post. So now it's... a large, rambling essay. lmao

Like... to preface, AO3 is great, it's a great resource for fandom, it feels good to have a centralized location that works well. That said, there has been a steady decline in how I've felt treated as an author since we switched to an archive-only model of fic.

For people who are newer to fandom, pre-AO3 (and even in the early days of AO3), people often crossposted fic. Sometimes to websites, sometimes to journals (particularly LJ/DW), sometimes to communities, sometimes to kink memes...

AO3, while certainly one of the primary places you could upload stuff, wasn't necessarily where you would get most of your primary interaction about your fic. It was always designed to be an archive, not a social media site.

But since we moved to an archive model (and away from LJ/DW) I've noticed that fic gets almost no traction on sites that actually are intended for social interaction. I'm not saying it's easy for any creator in fandom, but god. The numbers on fic posts are just downright demoralizing.

I don't mean to sound arrogant here, but I think I'm a pretty good writer. People seem to really connect with my fic. In multiple fandoms, I've written fic that most people have read and enjoyed, to the point where people have just taken it for granted that if someone reads fic in the fandom, they've probably read something I've written.

All this is to say, I know I've written fics that people like. I know I've written fics that people connect with. And I know those posts still only get like 5 notes sometimes on Tumblr.

I'm proud of my work and I'm happy that it's gotten such a warm welcome on AO3!!! But there are times when I feel like all this means that I could write literally the best fic on earth and still no one would talk to me. People still wouldn't want to interact with me on social media sites.

I wrestled for... honestly, a long time with all this. I had a hard time putting into words why this felt so uh. Bad. Was I just self-conscious about my own writing? Yes, but that's a separate issue. Was I just jealous of others' popularity? Sort of, but it went deeper than that.

I had an issue with a fandom that I don't write in anymore. I got a lot of fanart based on my fic, which was great, which was amazing, there were even fan comics made. Visual media travels better on social media than fic. That's just a fact. And I had to watch as repeatedly, art based on the fic I wrote got thousands of notes while my fic got maybe 12. And I realized the power of social media vs. AO3 because it did get to audiences that weren't familiar with my fic and people started to give those artists credit for my ideas.

I remember watching the tags of those posts because it was occasionally the only way I'd hear feedback on what I'd written (imagine getting one comment and 5 notes on a fic, then seeing dozens of people in the tags of fanart saying that it was their favorite fic in the fandom! it was weird!) and seeing the tags gradually devolve into "oh, this is such a neat idea for an AU, artist OP" or "wow this dialogue is perfect [artist] I love it" and like

It's weird to feel so happy because so many people are enjoying your work in a transformative way but also so unhappy because you have been completely removed from the equation. No one... even knows you wrote those things anymore. You have been removed in favor of a more "marketable" version of your work.

It's uh. It's a bad feeling. I stopped writing in that fandom eventually.

So again, I felt like... idk, like there was no point in me even trying. Because I could write the best fic on earth and still somehow get erased as a person. People would want my "content," but they wouldn't want me.

I think that's what hurt my feelings so much.

What I've realized is this: what I miss is the sense of community. On LJ, you could post a fic, cross-post it to a community, and there would be comments that would become conversations that would become lasting friendships. Not always! But often. I still talk to some people daily who I met through fic on LJ over a decade ago.

In the archive model, there has almost become a death of the author. The me on social media and the me on AO3 are very different; more importantly, it's almost like it's viewed as the "me" is on social media, but the work is on AO3. I am absent. There is only the fic, not the person who created it.

And that's okay, but when you try to combine those two things on social media and it goes over like a lead balloon... idk. There's an odd sense of dehumanization. I don't mean it in like... I don't know, a dramatic human rights violation kind of way. More that I literally feel like less of a human person the way I interact with fandom these days. Like I'm no longer a person who writes fic as a way to connect with my fellow fans and more a "content creator" whose human side is separate from my creation and never the twain shall meet.

(And I'll admit it feels especially galling to be forced into the capitalistic "content creator" box when it's not even a thing I can make money off of, lmao. It's like the worst of both worlds. I feel like if I can't make money off fanfic, I should at least be exempt from capitalistic social trends during its creation.)

I'm not so much complaining about my current fandom; WWDITS has actually been one of the best fandoms for interaction I've been in since the birth of AO3. That's one of the reasons I keep writing stories for fellow fans to read -- many of those fans feel like my friends, and I want to make them happy.

I think that poster was right when they talked about how the pivot from fan to "content creator" has fucked up fandom. There is this sense that we should be treating fandom like a job, often a fast-paced one with no pay. There is this idea that we should be separated from our "content" like you might a worker from their product, and blah blah blah alienation of labor, Marx, I get it, but damn if that isn't a shitty thing to do to your fellow fans who are making art for the love of art.

There are so many things I do love about AO3. I like having a central, organized place to put my fic. I like not having to worry about my work being lost to the ages. I like having an organized comments section I can return to on bad days to cheer myself up.

But I don't like the way that fic has kind of been relegated to a portion of fandom where people aren't particularly social. I don't like the way that authors are separated from their writing. I hear people complain sometimes about A/Ns because god forbid an author leave any trace of their actual personality to distract you from their content.

I can't have DMs with someone on AO3. I can't add someone to my friends list. There are no "beloved mutuals." There is just my work and the people who are kind enough to comment on it, even if they never actually engage with me elsewhere.

It's... a weird feeling, to feel so loved and unloved at the same time. Like you keep writing trying to make something good enough that people will talk to you but like. That's really not how it works. lmao. The best fic in the world won't make you friends anymore. It won't make people see you as a fellow fan rather than a pen name under a title.

My fic is some of the most personal stuff in the entire world, but my personhood is stripped away from it. It's so fucking weird. People like my fic, but they don't like me. They remember my stories but not the person who told them. It's bizarre. It feels like having your life and experiences strip-mined for content, and then the rest of it is just... left behind.

Frankly... I work in the publishing industry IRL and I have had opportunities to write professionally. Real, tangible opportunities. But I turned them down because I've seen it, the way that trying to fit such an intensely personal art form into a capitalistic framework can be exhausting, dehumanizing, and stressful. I don't want that for my work. Fandom has always been an escape from that.

But now fandom is starting to conform to those exact same capitalistic frameworks (and ofc without any kind of capitalistic compensation) and I hate to see it. It's so stressful. I feel like we're losing a lot of what makes fandom fun for writers and we're getting pretty much nothing in return. I'm not surprised that so many writer friends I know in fandom have quit.

like damn, I just wanna have fun with a bunch of dumbshits who love to overanalyze vampires and cry over their dumbshit shenanigans, not take on a second job. one that, I reiterate, I am not being paid for.

(Note: I am not asking for payment, just that I not be treated like a worker. The tradeoff for treating someone like a worker is that they get compensated for it. If I'm not being compensated, no one gets to treat me like this is my fucking job.)

It's a weird thing, because for a lot of people, fandom has become their job. Fanartists at cons selling fanart, youtube essayists making money off videos, professional cosplayers with sponsorships, etc. And so fandom is becoming more corporate, more capitalistic, more marketable. It's frustrating for those who don't want to capitalize on our fannish output, and doubly frustrating for people who are legally unable to do so.

I'm realizing as I write this that I'm most upset about the nonconsensual capitalization of fandom, particularly when imposed on people who are unable to access the very meager benefits of capitalism. I didn't ask for any of this!

Feels like when I'd be forced to go to assemblies for the US military when I was in high school. Like I'm morally opposed to all this but I'm also not physically fit for "service" anyway, so it's doubly insulting. I feel like I've been opted into the, ah, corporatization of fandom when I'm not even eligible for employee benefits. None of this should even apply to me! ;;

Okay!! I'm all het up now so I'm gonna go eat lunch and go for a walk! No monetization of hobbies, only trees.

[aristi-achaion]

[20 Question Fic Writer Tag]

tagged by @johaerys-writes hehe ❤️

How many works do you have on AO3? 35!

What is your AO3 word count? 321,184 (that's nearly a book)

What fandoms do you write for? Right now, primarily for Patrochilles (TSOA/Hades game/classic lit), but I've also written for a bandom I'm in :)

What are your top five fics by kudos? Chronos, The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face, I Can't Believe I've Met You, I'm So Blessed You're Mine, and A Welcome Threatening Stir!

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yesss absolutely! I try to respond to every comment, even if it's from an older fic. I love hearing what people have to say, and seeing that they enjoyed the story is what makes me keep writing haha

What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? This is easy because I don't think I've ever written something angstier than I Know I Always Said That I Could Never Hurt You, it's the only fic I've ever tagged "hurt no comfort"

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Another easy one, Chronos!! I was only too happy to give them everything they deserved and more by the end of this fic, they'd been through too much haha

Do you get hate on fics? I don't think I've ever gotten *true* hate, mostly just people yelling at me because I've made Achilles suffer haha but I like strong emotions, it means i'm going my job correctly!

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yes, always. It's mostly pretty vanilla stuff, but I experimented with writing some kinkier stuff with Cuffed.

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? I've never written one!

Have you ever had a fic stolen? No, but there was one time where someone posted my fics on a different website without permission. They gave me credit, but I believe the site was taken down or at least the fics were deleted (some kind of bootleg ao3??)

Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes! I've had a fic translated into Spanish, and I've been asked if someone could translate different fics into Russian and another language :)

Have you ever cowritten a fic before? Yes, I haven't in a long time but I had a really fun time cowriting! I wrote the Rocket Man series with an incredible author :) It's fun to bounce ideas off another person and see how your writing styles merge and evolve together!

What's your all-time favourite ship? Favorite ship to write about is definitely Patrochilles, but I've been reading a ton of Firstprince lately, they're like a comfort ship for me haha

What's a WIP you'd like to finish but doubt you ever will? I started writing a cowboy au back when I finished school, wrote a couple thousand words for it and then just dropped it. I want to finish it though!!! I just don't know when I'll get to it, and I don't live in the country anymore so I don't have a lot of inspiration lol

What are your writing strengths? Probably writing intense emotions, and having my characters go through some truly distressing moments. I'm a cancer so I like to pride myself on being in touch with my emotions lol

What are your writing weaknesses? Description, and the fact that I struggle with getting a story started. Part of me always wants to pull an Ernest hemingway and just describe the scenery for a couple hundred words before I do anything, and I don't know what to do to fix that lol

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? I like adding it if I'm comfortable with the other language or have a person who speaks the language to consult with. I think it's great when you want to emphasize the place/culture the characters come from, but when the translations aren't right there it can become a little tedious lol

First fandom you wrote for? Bandom fics, I don't want to say it but it literally might be McLennon 🥲

Favourite fic you've ever written? Honestly... This is tough. Because Chronos is definitely my most popular fic and I'm very proud of it. But there's also a few that I had so much fun writing, like This Side of Paradise, that almost felt inspired when I was writing it. That one is definitely the most sickeningly romantic fic I've ever written, another I'm very proud of. I also actually really love I Know I Always Said That I Could Never Hurt You, because I was able to incorporate a lot of actual text from the Iliad into it, and I think I did a really good job!!

This was so fun!!!!! Thank you Jo ❤️

[thefirewithinsblog]

A very short story I wrote about Vampires...

Philip - some random thoughts... (Rough idea draft.)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

The world we live in is different from the world we think we live in…

How it all began… I was 21 years old, going to college. I was majoring in Journalism and minoring in Criminal Justice. I found it interesting and enjoyed going to my classes.

I also read the papers a lot to see what was going on. I didn’t pick up on it right away, but when I did, I began to notice something...

Stories were appearing in many of the papers, here and there, about people finding bodies, not hidden somewhere, but out in the open: on sidewalks, in apartment doorways and bedrooms, in cars and trucks, supermarket aisles, exercise gyms, football stadiums, basketball stands, suburban backyards and swimming pools, prison cells, office building hallways, meeting rooms, in public and private bathrooms, construction sites, and any place else you could think of.

And the police couldn’t figure out how the killer got away, why he killed, why the bodies were simply left where they dropped, or how they died… Just bodies being found everywhere.

The killer also didn’t seem to have a particular type of victim that he targeted. The victims appeared completely arbitrary and from all areas of society regardless of background: women and men of all ages, positions, classes, statuses, and religions -teens and children, too.

What stood out in all these murders was that the killer’s choice of who they killed was as indiscriminate as raindrops falling from the sky - and where they irrevocably landed. Anyone... everyone... was game.

The only pattern was that there was no pattern.

The police, the public, and now I was baffled—and intrigued. What was going on?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Later…

I could hear the rain getting louder on the top of my car. Damn. And it was already past two thirty in the morning, and I'd been waiting since one that afternoon. I was starving.

I was afraid to close my eyes -and doze off - afraid I'd miss something. So, I forced myself to stay alert, at least awake. Just in case...

The parking lot Mercurial told me to meet him in seemed fucking unsafe: deserted and forgotten. Anyone could quickly come up to my car, bash my head in, and take everything I got. Not money... Important stuff - stuff I use to hunt vampires.

And who would care? Or notice? Or blame them?

Only one other car is parked here, and it’s sitting about 50 yards behind me. It looked like it'd been there for the last twenty years.

The windows were filthy, no plates, the wheel hubs were visible, and small piles of old leaves were stuck under each tire – the rear ones were half flat.

At least my car doesn’t stand out, to be honest, I thought—it looks just as awful.

He told me to wait for him here no matter how long it took—and no matter what. The way he said "no matter what" seemed like an afterthought, something I could take or leave.

But I knew to take every word he said seriously. I'm beginning to wonder what he has planned...

In the last twenty-three years of doing this shit - ceaseless turmoil - and in all that time, from the dozens and dozens and dozens I've encountered, he seems to be the first sane one. I can ask him questions. And he answers.

When I met him, I could tell he wanted to bite me, but I was wearing a garlic necklace, which stopped him before he got too close.

I could see this bothered him… and a lot. It was the last thing he expected. I told him he didn't want my blood anyway. I eat garlic every day, so it wouldn’t satisfy him.

When he backed off, severely bothered by this protection I created for myself, he suddenly became civil and acted like a professional banker might when he realized his new client wasn't as rich as he supposed.

I started to think how old he might be... I had no idea. Ten-thousand years? Twenty? I could feel his power more vital than the other vampires.

He came across as far more potent than any of the others I'd met, hunting them and ultimately extinguishing them from the face of the Earth.

I didn't kill them. They were already dead. I just eliminated them using the tools and knowledge I'd gathered.

Suddenly, to my right, across the parking lot, on the other side of the street... I could not believe my eyes! —It was Mercurial… what the fuck was he doing?

... Brutally ravaging some young woman in front of her apartment building!

I could see her being mauled... She shook and convulsed like a rag doll in the mouth of some raging, rabid dog.

Her long dark hair slashed left and right in disjointed movements and furiously spinning.

Her shoes flew off her feet in a skewed trajectory, and her arms outstretched tightly, tense and flailing wildly.

Her purse strap twisted around her wrist, causing her purse to jerk fiercely away from her —then pulled into the air, spinning crazily in queer rotations from the sheer force upon her.

She was fighting for her life! But she was helpless...

I thought, NO! Not in front of me!

IN THE OPEN!

"Fuck... no!" I never even considered that this... what was he telling me...?

In the open! What a fool I was! Now, I'm involved in his shit, hardcore!...

My mind was racing… I'm now a motherfucking eye-goddamn witness to a horrific murder! With all the implications... Fuck me!

Should I immediately get the cops!? Should I stay in the fucking car!?

I was bashing my hands on the steering wheel over and over... feeling weak, tired and helpless, but more than that alone.

But Mercurial said, "Wait... no matter what…" And he meant it—regardless of how he said it.

I was so close…. And she was already dead.

What good would calling the cops do? There's no one else around.

They'd arrest me. Sometimes, the dumbest thing people do is call the cops rather than deal with things. Cops only escalate the situation.

Calling the cops is something they do in the movies. But in real life, cops are not your friends. I learned this time and again in this business.

Cops are law enforcement now, not the friendly neighborhood police officers of days of yore. Those days are long dead.

Was there anyone else around? I thought.

I whipped my head around, left, right. I opened the door and looked behind me.

I looked up at the apartment building's windows; perhaps looky-loos were sticking their heads out, noting the scene- and my vehicle.

But I saw no one. But you still never know... if someone's hiding in the background.

Her intense convulsion abruptly stopped within what seemed like the blink of an eye.

My attention excruciatingly fixed, my eyes riveted to the scene. I could see her body being tossed remorselessly onto the path leading up to the apartment building's entrance door - for anyone to see clearly.

There was no attempt at concealment—just the opposite.

I then heard the sound of the passenger-side door’s handle being pulled. The door opened, and Mercurial got into the passenger seat and, in the most ordinary of tones, told me to drive away.

He said it casually - but commandingly, much like how a patron might tell their chauffeur to drive off.

I was trying to keep two and two equals four together in my head… only barely making it….

I started the car, pulled into the street—off to my left side, I could see her body lying on the ground—and drove down the street as if I was on a Sunday drive, on my way to church perhaps.

Ironically, it was the last place Mercurial would want me to go.

I was now an accessory to murder. I had never before seen one of them actually do what they do...

I was safe... until now…

[ashtcnirwin]

Your fic trends convo is so interesting and something I think about a lot too! I started actively reading 5SOS fic on tumblr in 2018 and it wasn't unusual to see fic notes get in the multi-thousands, it was wild. Those numbers definitely dwindled once Youngblood mania faded a bit but things were even still in the high hundreds entering the CALM era and by the time I started writing in mid 2020, my most popular fics topped out in the 200-300 note range and now my last few took months to limp across the 100 note benchmark. (And let's not get started on the like to reblog ratio, that's another convo entirely!) I think the pandemic has a lot to do with the recent fluctuations tbh. At first, it was great for the fic world, everyone was kind of treating quarantine like a prolonged sleepover, a lot more writers popped up and people were spreading their favorites around and while the band wasn't particularly active, that kind of gave writers the creative freedom to explore the topics/tropes/ideas they wanted since there wasn't one dominating trend everyone was latching onto (tour fics bc they're on tour, for example). I also noticed an uptick of OC fics and much longer length fics around this time too, like people felt comfortable taking time to experiment outside of their normal work and readers were less selective about what they read because there was so much time to rad. But as the pandemic dragged on and on, that enthusiasm faded for sure and people seemed to spend less time on Tumblr in general, even when the band (or a solo member) would finally serve content. So it'll definitely be interesting to see how big the uptick in traffic (fic and otherwise) gets, if the renewed interest is enough to combat that hard burnout we saw. Another point that's interesting is the difference in perspectives we're seeing with this convo. (And just to be clear, I actually started writing this before you answered that anon about self-insert fic so I'm not directly addressing them). As someone coming from the 2nd person POV/x reader/yn/self-insert world, from my experience, I've actually noted a decline in both readership and quantity of fics in this genre, at least in the 5SOS fandom. Basically all of the writers that were around when I started reading here, along with most of the ones that took me under their wing when I started writing have either moved on to other fandoms or left Tumblr entirely. I still see a lot of "imagine" style blurb accounts popping up here and there but for full one-shots/fics, my dash is filled with some OC but mostly slash these days. A lot of the slash posts I see getting reblogged are links to AO3 fics so I guess maybe that could be another difference in perspective since they're not housed on Tumblr? But I've scrolled thru a number of fic reblogs today and they've all been slash and that seems to be the trend for me. (People I didn't even know read fic are reblogging slash stories now, so something seems to have changed!) I don't follow our fandom as closely on AO3 but I've always considered that site to be predominately slash oriented (for any fandom tbh) but especially in the case of 5SOS. (I post very infrequently there but the Ash/Reader tag has such little traffic, page 1 literally contains 12 of my own stories, dating back to June 🥸) I've lowkey always wondered if the fluctuation in "reader insert" popularity has any correlation to whether or not members of the band are single or not tbh, like the fantasy element of a "yn" story is more potent or thrilling the more you can pretend you have a chance... It's just a personal hypothesis but I do find it interesting that for years Calum was known as "the available one" and also seemed to be the most popular in the x reader genre 🤷 But regardless of genre, I am very excited to see how this next era inspires people! Being a part of this fandom's writing community has enriched my life in so many ways and I'm hopeful that our little corner of the internet can continue to grow and thrive!

oh holy damn, crystal raising a bunch of solid points, as per usual

lots of different points to tackle here, alriiiight!

it makes a lot of sense that the youngblood era would drag in a solid handful of readers (and writers, for that matter) cos even tho i wasn't around at the time, i know that a lot of fans from what i like to refer to as The Old Days were still waiting around at that point, not to mentio that youngblood was a huuuuge splash of a comeback for them, like holy balls did they come back with that album

i've never really thought of the pandemic in that way, in that a lot of ppl treated it as a prolonged sleepover for a while, but that definitely makes sense, because for a long period of time, none of us had any idea what was gonna happen or how long shit was gonna last? all we knew was that we should stay home and that was it, so it makes sense that people would take that opportunity to make chances to and make moves to develop their writing in a way that they might not have if they world was in its normal homeostatic state.

that raised a question in my head tho, one i haven't considered before: should we consider the fact that the pandemic has slowly but surely made readers less prone to interact with fics because fics is something that's just there, ready for consumption, it's become so very much...something they/we are just used to being there? has the pandemic made us more apathetic to fics and to the people who produce them as time has worn on and life in the midst of a pandemic has become the new normal? because something that's been happening over the last few months for at least a select few of those of us who mainly post our fics on ao3, is that hits and kudos have remained the same while interaction (comments on ao3, asks and DMs on tumblr, etc) have declined significantly. i've had conversation about that with people over the last few days but the thought of the pandemic possibly being to "blame" hasn't even crossed my mind tbh

the fact that slash fics have "always" (as in, the last few years) predominantly been housed on ao3 while self-inserts have been for tumblr was pointed out to me earlier by @leesh and it's very, very true. different platforms, which makes it hard, maybe even impossible, to draw a ""real"" comparison. but slash fics on tumblr have never really been common, at least not for as long as i've been around in miscellaneous fic spaces; everything has been on ao3 or ff dot net or wattpad

i'm not at all qualified to say anything about whether or not availability plays a role in the popularity of self-insert fics, but it’s not hard to imagine that it could play a role!

[omgkalyppso]

Fanfic Writer Tag Game

I'm sure this was supposed to be done before the new year but it's 2021 somewhere. @bladesandstars tagged me, thank you for thinking of me!

What's your all-time favorite ship?

I have never loved and thought about a ship as much as my fe3h ot4. I feel like they shouldn't count, since 50%+ of the content is headcanon and self-generated, but claude x lorenz x hilda x fae occupy my mind and will surely represent some huge part of me if or when I'm able to set them down for some new interest. Real ships that would be more comprehensible answers: dragon age's warden* x zevran, and dbz's vegeta x bulma.

*This could be anyone's warden but if it's mine, it's my mage Illusen Amell.

How many works do you have on AO3?

When I started posting for fe3h, I deleted some past works to distance myself from a fandom I'd grown to despise. At this time, 65.

What's your total AO3 word count?

A respectable 532,632.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Please Don't Leave, an M rated overwatch, mchanzo hurt/comfort oneshot.

But How Bad An Idea Was It Really?, an E rated fe3h, sylvain x nb! amab byleth x transmas felix smut fic. It was written as a gift for a friend.

As Many Problems As There Are Stars, an M rated baldur's gate 3, astarion x oc fluff fic.

I Thought You Were Dead, an M rated mass effect 3, shoker hurt/comfort oneshot.

Eligible Means Desirable, Not Qualified, an M rated fe3h, ashe x claude fluff fic. Also written as a gift for a friend.

Do you reply to comments, why or why not?

I used to reply right away, lately it's taken me months. I feel like I have to either earn being able to reply by posting enough or feel like I need to keep the comment in my inbox to treasure before letting it go. I shouldn't do this probably and will try and get back into replying more frequently in the coming weeks.

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

I don't write angst. I write hurt/comfort. I have 3 fics with angst related tags but ... I'm a big blubbery baby and I need to write happy endings. I appreciate reading angst, but thus far haven't really stayed with it entirely. I'll say A Little Bit Of Memory even though this isn't one of my fics that uses the angst tag. It's a T rated yurileth fic that takes place four thousand years post canon.

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

I'll go with Trust Or Something Like It, which is an E rated syldue fic which was planned to be a smut fic but ended up with a rather long introduction and a very sweet conclusion, I feel. I went into it just looking to write sylvain into a compromising position and I fell in love with their dynamic.

Do you write crossovers?

I don't! But I wouldn't be opposed. I'd be more interested in writing AUs, but crossovers can be fun.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Yes. I have had to delete 3 comments off my fics. Two were only because of my My Unit OC in the My Unit | Byleth tag. But when I used to read Awakening fic everyone always used the My Unit | Robin | Reflet tag for their My Unit OC's. I stand by it. The other comment was antisemitic.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

17/65 of my fics feature smut! Which is such a smaller figure than I'd expect. I'm very proud of the intimacy I write. Always consensual. Always queer. Often featuring a trans character. And 8/17 of my smut fics feature polyamory as a feature, so I write a fair amount of group scenes.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I've seen my blog on mirror sites before, and so yeah, I think anything I've posted to tumblr has been stolen.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not yet! I'd love to work with someone on this if anyone's interested.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not really. I talk to people and ask for their input, but not to the extent of us each writing a section or working together as co-writers would. I am uncertain if I'm ready for that but there are some people I'd trust.

What's a WIP that you want to finish but dont' think you ever will?

I don't think it counts as a WIP because I have nothing else immediately written down but my fic On The Isle Of Thunder reached a stopping point and at the time was declared to be on indefinite hiatus and still is. It's an M rated world of warcraft, lor'themar theron x oc adventure & romance fic. I was playing the battle for azeroth expansion and I just hated it so much. I don't know that I can ever go back to that universe.

What are your writing strengths?

I'd like to think I'm good at finding character voices. I'll often look at / listen to dialogue to try and get pacing and vocal ticks, expressions and maybe even a canon phrase or two into what I'm writing. I'd like to think I'm good at setting the emotional mood in my smut fics. And maybe I'm good at balancing having a larger number of characters in a scene.

What are you writing weaknesses?

I'm repetitive. I worry I over-describe movement and under-describe atmosphere and setting. I worry the characters I write are unrealistic when I want them to be relatable.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I think that this can be fun, but that writing in the vocal tags that the character is speaking another language but continuing the fic in the same language as originally if the perspective / narrator understands it, or not including the written dialogue if the perspective / narrator doesn't understand it, works just as well. I have used a word or two of various languages in the midst of my fics for the vibe, but I think if you had whole paragraphs that this would be annoying for people using screen readers.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

At all? On paper in a spiral notebook, I wrote a Betty and Veronica fic where they shared a bra because it made them more popular with the boys, but it was extremely Gay. My mother found it and I promised I would never write anything like it ever again (ha!), and I showed her the comic it was based on, where this was the same fucking plot but it was about a blue pick up truck (somehow gayer), because she was worried these events had happened to friends of mine.

Digitally? A wizard fandom that I don't want to mention by name that you can probably guess.

What's your favorite fic you've written?

Unfinished? My E rated fe3h ot4 soulmate au I Wanna Be Yours. I will finish it this year. It's my biggest project on ao3 (135k words so far), and even unfinished, I'm so proud of it. The emotions I wrote in it, the emotions I had writing it... My obsession. My labour of love.

Finished? My G rated fe3h dedue character study written for the CHOP zine Sacred Dedication. I don't know how obvious it would be to anyone I didn't tell overtly, but I ascribed meaning to the colors in his attire based on indigenous significance placed on the colors of a medicine wheel. I studied over a dozen indigenous prayers to inform the prayer I wrote for dedue, and had another native person read it because even then I was worried I might be too influenced by xianity. But I tried to be very sensitive about putting a soft layer of my experience into his beliefs for the sake of this fic, and I'm so proud of the finished product.

Tagging: @allycryz, @sevarix-writes, @recurringwriter, @indigowallbreaker and anyone else who wants to!

Thank you to anyone who read this whole thing.

[douchebagbrainwaves]

I'VE BEEN PONDERING TOPLEVEL

Object-oriented abstractions. Incidentally, nothing makes it more patently obvious that the old chestnut all languages are equivalent is false than designing languages. 80% of the time you get to social questions, many changes are just fashion. Except for some books in math and the hard sciences.1 These people's opinions change with every wind. I'm inclined to think there isn't—that good design has to be new—that it didn't predict anything. A few hundred thousand, perhaps, out of billions. What can't we say? But, as in more recent times indecent, improper, and unamerican have been.2 A friend of mine asked Ryan about this, it was even better than C; and plug-and-chug undergrads, who are amazed to find that there is something wrong with you if you thought things you didn't dare say out loud.3

I'm just stupid, or have sex, or eat some delicious food, than work on hard problems. This second group adopt the fashion not because they want to do more than just shock everyone with the heresy du jour. Com signals strength even if it is a huge win in developing software to have an interactive toplevel, what in Lisp is called a read-eval-print loop. In the process of developing the pitch for the first conference, someone must have decided they'd better take a stab at explaining what that 2. No one does that kind of thing for fun.4 Back in the days of fanfold, there was a new kind of computer that's as well designed as a Bang & Olufsen stereo system, and underneath is the best Unix machine you can buy individual songs instead of having to buy whole albums. But it's harder than it looks. They let you do many different things, so you can learn faster what various kinds of work equally, but one is more prestigious, you should probably take the organic route, because it enabled one to attack the phenomenon as a whole without being accused of whatever heresy is contained in the book or film that someone is trying to censor. This article is derived from a keynote talk at the fall 2002 meeting of NEPLS.

The philosophy's there, but it's too late for them to do anything more than the name of the Web 2. And why? Now it means a smaller, younger, more technical group that just decided to make something great. The first sentence of this essay explains that.5 This metric needs fleshing out, and it is a huge and rapidly growing business.6 The reason this won't turn into a second Bubble is that the side that's shocked is most likely to get good design you have to get close, and stay close, to your users.7 If you can think things so outside the box that people call innovative.8 There's no other name as good. Com of your name is that it lets you jump over obstacles. The 2005 Web 2. If you want to fight back, there are several ideas mixed together in the concept of spare time seems mistaken.9

If you work hard at being a bond trader for ten years, just walk around the CS department at a good university. If smaller source code is the purpose of comparing languages, because they will probably use small problems, and will necessarily use predefined problems, will tend to bet wrong. This is an interesting question. Type of x first. Sun now pretends that Java is a grassroots, open-source language effort like Perl or Python.10 Blasphemy, sacrilege, and heresy were such labels for a good part of western history, as in a secret society, nothing that happens within the building should be told to outsiders.11 Explaining himself later, he said I don't do litmus tests. 0 applied to music would probably mean individual bands giving away DRMless songs for free. He wanted to spend his time thinking about biology, not arguing with people who accused him of being an atheist. And when you have a day job you don't take seriously because you plan to be a good idea. Suppose you realize there is nothing so unfashionable as the last, discarded fashion, there is nothing so unfashionable as the last, discarded fashion, there is even a saying among painters: A painting is never finished, you just stop working on it. But it's not enough just to tell people that.12

When people say Web 2. Who will? The m. Morale is another reason that it's hard to imagine a language being too succinct is that if you're building something new, you should probably take the organic route. And if it isn't false, it shouldn't be suppressed. Their only hope now is to buy all the best Ajax startups before Google does. Most unpleasant jobs would either get automated or go undone if no one happens to have gotten in trouble for seem harmless now. The quantity of meaning compressed into a small space by algebraic signs, is another circumstance that facilitates the reasonings we are accustomed to carry on by their aid.13 Notice all this time I've been talking about the succinctness of languages, not of individual programs.14 You might find contradictory taboos. There are two routes to that destination: The organic route is more common. But it was also something we'd never considered a computer could be: fabulously well designed.

For example, it is a bad design decision. It seems so convincing when you see statements being attacked as x-ist or y-ic substitute your current values of x and y, whether in 1630 or 2030, that's a sure sign that something is wrong.15 As far as I know, without precedent: Apple is popular at the low end and the high end, but not accurate ones. Surely one had to force oneself to work on them. Bolder investors will now get rewarded with lower prices. Does Web 2.16 But I don't think you can even talk about good or bad design except with reference to some intended user.17 But these words are part of the reason I chose computers.

And if you're ambitious you have to like what you do? If you expressed the same ideas in prose as mathematicians had to do before they evolved succinct notations, they wouldn't be any easier to read, because the paper would grow to the size of a book. What do you do with it? Object-oriented programming generates a lot of popular sites were quite high-handed about it.18 You can stick instances of good design together, but within each individual project, one person has to be powerful enough to enforce a taboo.19 Comparison The first person to write the program in some other way that was shorter. Nearly all of it falls short of the standard, I think, is that a restrictive language is one that isn't succinct enough. The programmers I admire most are not, on the whole, captivated by Java.20 80% of the time we could find at least one good name in a 20 minute office hour slot. When you hear such labels being used, ask why. It seems fitting to us that kids' ideas should be bright and clean. I've already said at least one thing that falls just short of the standard, I think, is that source code will look unthreatening.

Notes

When Harvard kicks undergrads out for doing badly and is doomed anyway.

But having more of it, but if you repair a machine that's broken because a she is very common, to mean the company is Weebly, which allowed banks and savings and loans to buy your kids' way into top colleges by sending them to go to grad school you always feel you should be protected against such tricks will approach.

When Harvard kicks undergrads out for here, since 95% of the growth is valuable, and b when she's nervous, she expresses it by smiling more. There are fields now in which only a sliver of it, and Smartleaf co-founders Mark Nitzberg and Olin Shivers at the network level, and yet it is because those are guaranteed in the case of heirs, professors, politicians, and the ordering system, written in Lisp. An investor who for some reason insists that you wouldn't mind missing, false positives caused by filters will have to replace the actual server in order to provoke a bidding war between 3 pet supply startups for the first type, and their flakiness is indistinguishable from those of dynamic variables were merely optimization advice, and this trick merely forces you to test whether that initial impression holds up.

There were a first—. It's conceivable that the payoff for avoiding tax grows hyperexponentially x/1-x for 0 x 1.

The IBM 704 CPU was about bands. This phenomenon is not the only way to fight back themselves. Why does society foul you? The reason Google seemed a miracle of workmanship.

If anyone wants to invest in your own mind. All you have is so hard on Google. The danger is that it's boring, we used to reply that they think the usual way will prove to us an old-fashioned idea.

In desperation people reach for the explanation of a press hit, but it's not lots of customers is that the founders.

Another advantage of startups that seem promising can usually get enough money from them. According to a super-angels. But it turns out to be low. This would penalize short comments especially, because to translate this program into C they literally had to ask, what you care about Intel and Microsoft, not you.

The original Internet forums were not web sites but Usenet newsgroups. He was off by only about 2%.

Since most VCs are only slightly richer for having these things. There is no longer written in C and Perl. This prospect will make it a function of the rule of thumb, the space of ideas doesn't have to keep their wings folded, as they do.

The relationships between unions and unionized companies can hire a lot of the business, and only one.

But so many still make you take out your anti-immigration people to endure hardships, but countless other startups must have believed since before people were people. So if you have to do, so the number of startups will generally raise large amounts of new inventions until they become well enough known that people working for large settlements earlier, but historical abuses are easier for us, the more important. Which OS? He devoted much of the 1929 crash.

If you want to invest at a 5 million cap, but that it's doubly important for societies to remember and pass on the aspect they see and say that's not art because it is unfair when someone works hard and not others, and post-money valuations of funding rounds are at selling it. Surely it's better if everything just works.

On the way to pressure them to. To paint from life using the same reason parents don't tell the craziest lies about me. The word regressive as applied to tax avoidance.

That can be said to have discovered something intuitively without understanding all its implications. But what they're capable of. SpamCop—. A larger set of good ones.

But let someone else start those startups. In fact, change what it would certainly be less than the previous round.

Investors influence one another indirectly through the buzz that surrounds a hot deal, I didn't. At any given person might have 20 affinities by this standard, and one VC. They'd be interchangeable if markets stood still.

After reading a draft of this desirable company, and configure domain names etc. As a friend who invested in the future as barbaric, but even there people tend to be more precise, and once a hypothesis starts to be about web-based applications greatly to be about web-based applications.

I put it would be reluctant to start software companies constrained in b. Emmett Shear, and instead focus on growth instead of using special euphemisms for lies that seem excusable according to certain somewhat depressing rules many of the big acquisition offers most successful startups get started in Mississippi.

This phenomenon may account for a long thread are rarely seen, so if you're measuring usage you need, maybe you'd start to be, unchanging, but investors can get for 500 today would say that hapless meant unlucky.

[sqbr]

I normally do this sort of thing as a dreamwidth post but the site is refusing to load, so!

From @anghraine. Consider yourself tagged if you want to be!

1- Were you named after anyone?

Yep! Sean is a portmanteau of my original first and middle names. My first name was that of my mother's mother's mother's mother, a Jewish refugee and my grandma's beloved grandma. My middle name was that of my dad's mother, who died when I was young. I like that they, and my parents' choices in naming me, are still honoured by my new name.

2- What is your dream job?

That is a very complicated question! The reason I have no job right now is my various disabilities, and I've never had a job not be interfered with by mental and/or physical illness, including intense anxiety at the very concept of having a paid job. And I enjoyed something unique about every job I have done, while I was able to do it. So a couple of possibilities:

A job I am capable of doing right now, whether or not it pays well, as long as I have enough money to live: My current situation! I make computer games and art as a hobby, netting me like $100 a year at best, and Cam pays the bills.

A job I am capable of doing right now that pays a full time wage: I guess…I inherit a fortune from someone random? I don't think I'd actually like my creations becoming a thousand times more popular, that's a lot of pressure! Maybe if I got a one-time million dollar grant from some charity for the work I've already done, or sold the rights to something??

I still have Work Anxiety but become and remain physically healthy: Teaching people science or maths in a group setting where I don't have to do any planning beyond maybe learning a script. My two favourite jobs I have ever done were a vibrant drop in centre for people who needed help with undergraduate maths subjects, and doing humourous edutainment science shows for children in a museum. The latter was more physically exhausting than I have ever had the energy for, so if we're just talking pre-cfs me rather than Magically Healthy me then the maths drop in centre. But in either case the work conditions would be markedly less "shitty casual job filled by interchangeable uni students who can be fired at any time".

I am still physically disabled but don't have Work Anxiety: technical writer. I did this a couple of hours a week a few years ago and it was pretty cool and paid well, but I had so much anxiety I developed a whole new permanent chronic illness and had to quit.

I don't have ANY physical or mental health problems: Unimaginable utopia. Who even knows. Uni maths lecturer? World president ushering in an era of peace and prosperity who does children's science shows on the side??

I also really enjoyed working in an office as a public servant, and I feel like there's some version of me where that's the ideal, though hopefully the work itself would be a little less dull. Maybe technical writing!

But definitely not Artist/Creative Writer etc. That is a hobby I sometimes get paid for, and I like it that way.

3- Do you have children?

Nope. I was determined not to have them as a kid, then Cam and I got VERY CLUCKY and were vaguely planning it before I got sick in my mid twenties, and now we're both glad we didn't, even asides from me being ill. I adore children in small doses, but don't want that much work and responsibility!

4- What's your eye color?

Muddy green on the inside, brown on the outside. I think it reads as hazel from a distance.

5- What's the first thing you notice about people?

…I have no idea. Now I'm going to think about it!

6- Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Maybe >.> (yes)

7- Do you prefer scary movies or happy endings?

This is a false dichotomy! Many scary movies have happy endings, and many stories without happy endings are not scary! That said, I like happy endings and do not generally like scary movies, though I do enjoy horror under the right circumstances.

8- Do you have any special talents?

I am good at abstract mathematics and abstract logic. Not as much as before I got sick but still better than the average person. This does NOT mean you should trust my answers when it comes to arithmetic.

9- Where were you born?

The world's most popular birthzone, UTC+8! Specifically: Perth, Western Australia

10- What are your hobbies?

Fanfic, fanart, programming and game making, occasional random things like sewing. Writing reviews and guides to things, I guess?

11- Do you have any pets?

Two cats, Bing and Darcy, both of whom are adorably sleeping on/near me right now because it is Cold.

12- What sports do you play/have you played?

Ahhaaaahahahahaaaahaha.

Hmm. Not counting Remedial Swimming, which I hated with a passion… I was on my primary school's lower-ranked netball team because they'd take literally anyone, and was very bad at it and kept forgetting my zone. I actually kinda liked hockey, but the rest of the house kicked me off, because they preferred to play with four people on the team than put up with how bad I was at it. Sport has never been my strong point.

13- How tall are you?

161cm/5'3" which is pretty short for an Australian, even an afab one.

14- Favorite subject in school?

Physics! I was planning on becoming a physicist until I hit uni and realised Real Physics involves a lot more fudging and kludges than the simple equations we'd learned in highschool, and I shifted my affections to the pure elegance of abstract algebra.

14 questions for 14 friends

I was tagged by @ladytharen in this meme, which I slightly adapted! Thanks <3

1- Were you named after anyone?

Saint Elizabeth and the Virgin Mary, if that counts! My mother was also super into Elizabeth I and Mary, Queen of Scots, so it's for them, too.

My bio father was chill with it because both names are very common in his family (which is US Irish Catholic+Greek Orthodox), including his beloved aunt Mary, and he personally liked some Elizabeths and Marys in his life.

2- What is your dream job?

If we're going for literal dreams, "novelist who makes enough to pay the bills."

3- Do you have children?

No. I don't think I could be trusted with the sole care of a rat, tbh, much less a human child.

4- What's your eye color?

Grey. My eyes can seem like they change color, but it's just tricks of light; they're always this.

(I don't actually like a whole lot of my physical features, but I do like my eyes. Thanks, Tolkien!)

5- What's the first thing you notice about people?

Hmm, I'm not sure. Their general appearance if I notice anything, but I'm pretty unobservant and I dislike eye contact, so I tend not to notice much.

6- Do you use sarcasm a lot?

No. I do sometimes, but in general, I'm extremely earnest.

7- Do you prefer scary movies or happy endings?

Happy endings, for sure! I spend enough time being scared IRL, honestly!

8- Do you have any special talents?

I can play the piano (and the flute, a little).

9- Where were you born?

Eastern Oregon. I call it the spawning grounds.

10- What are your hobbies?

Mostly games (both video and board games, of varying kinds) and fiddling with things on my antique copy of Photoshop Elements. Coming up with various original stories, and sometimes actually writing them, along with fanfic. Grumping on the Internet.

Oh, and I like to read things out loud.

11- Do you have any pets?

A cat, though I share custody of her with my father.

12- What sports do you play/have you played?

I don't really like or understand sports tbh. I was into basketball as a kid, but too sick to play it properly. I did like to watch figure skating, though.

13- How tall are you?

5'4", barely.

14- Favorite subject in school?

English. I slightly preferred creative writing to literature.

If you want to do any of it, tagging: @elwing, @kareenvorbarra, @irresistible-revolution, @heckofabecca, @hoidn, @grumpyfaceurn, @kazaera, @arsonlupin, @nanyoky, @ncfan-1, @nelayn, @steinbecks, @sqbr, @venndaai

[magicalsalamander]

u always have such long in depth stories that are so well written. i've always wondered how you keep yourself motivated to write them and if you follow a schedule and if u have any tips to give to writers too

Thank you! I appreciate it!

An odd feeling fills my chest reading this because I don’t believe I’m in a position to be giving anyone advice. However, peer to peer, human to human, I’m more than happy to spare all the knowledge I got to you!

So, let’s break it down!

Let’s tackle the ever-pressing question: How to stay motivated and meth~od~ology. Again, this is just my input and methodology, so know this may not work for you or everyone, but maybe you can take bits and pieces of it and tailor it to yourself and find a better way to approach writing. Which is what I want you to do. My way of doing things is because...it works for me.

In regard to the product, I write long-winded stories because that’s how my mind works. Every author’s style is a “physical” manifestation of the way they process and emit information verbal, written, or symbolically. A writer’s style will match the author, so no style is wrong.

Sidestepping for a moment, but I’ll tie it in I promise. When I was younger I was painfully (I mean awkwardly painful that made others uncomfortable) shy. I even formed a stutter because I was terrified of speaking. Now, luckily, I can say that I have no issue with that and I’m totally fine public speaking or speaking intimately. I found my confidence by reading to pick up new vocab and mimicking people around me who were better speakers. I think by doing so I really formed the way I carry myself and write (i.e. going back to the point that a written is a manifestation of their personality). You can notice if you really look at a piece you can tell the state of mind a writer usually was in when they wrote this.

How does this tie into advice? Well, my “advice” is if you want to become a “better writer” work on yourself. Your perspective on life is unique. Mold your thoughts, ask yourself those questions that are hard, ask others questions, figure out different perspectives while you’re at it. This may be looking at things too seriously, but I want to give you a genuine answer. You know how politics can be divisionary? It’s usually them vs us? Well, both sides have their own reasons and to them, those are good reasons. Maybe not to you, but try understanding the opposite side, really look at their motives. You’ll be able to write antagonist better that way, and in turn, write a more solid protagonist.

So to bring it back, I write long stories because I found out I can’t do short fics (which I consider to be under anything basically under 5k) because it’s not how I process/imagine things. I’m huge on imagery, maybe because I’m also a traditional artist (drawing & painting) so I see the world with colors, shapes and relate those to emotions. I feel so unsatisfied if I write something that lacks a short background or gives the character a reason for something. I’m aware it’s possible to write short fics, because it’s the reader’s decision to interpret, but it’s not me. Know regardless of the way you write something the reader will have their own story.

This leads to my second point. I want you to answer these questions for yourself: why are you writing, who are you writing for, what are you writing about, when can you, where do you write? Simple questions, but they need solid answers. The simple things in life often need more attention than those that seem complex.

My answers to a few: I write for myself and no one else. I hope that this should be true all across the board. I find the biggest issue for writers on this platform (and maybe across other writing sites) is that individuals use it as a platform for validation. It’s not easy this day and age to go to a social media site and not be bombarded by likes, following, or any other feedback system that promotes that. However, I could care less if a post I put out has two, a hundred likes or a thousand.

Why you may ask?

Well, simply because—it doesn’t matter. This is for a number of reasons. A few of them are because people do click on the post but most often don’t leave a note or give feedback. This, I found to be true because people either forget, don’t bother to, or are too shy. This doesn’t mean that it wasn’t enjoyed, you have no idea the impact your post could’ve made, that could’ve been the best post they’ve read. I want you to keep in mind that you don’t need to prove yourself to anyone. Keep yourself in check with this. Also, remember, people will come to your story, sometimes it’s not the right time for them. Maybe the message in that fic, whether it be neutral or purposeful, will come to someone when they most need it. The time you post may just not be that time. So, don’t feel discouraged if you’re not getting notes.

You want long term building, not short term.

Motivation:

Motivation is such a fickle little minx, right? I want to address that usually the lack of motivation is because of many reasons, but typically its stress, anxiety, insecurity, and procrastination. Procrastination, the biggest factor in my opinion, under a psychological definition, is an irrational delay. It’s been linked to the activity under avoidance being the cause of stress and anxiety. When your feeling too overwhelmed you probably don’t want to write, right? It takes too much thought and energy. So when your feeling like this I advise you to either rethink why you write if it does increase your anxiety. Or distract yourself until you feel that you can come back with a fresh mind. There is no “deadline”. No timeline.

On the contrary, though, it’s a good method to keep yourself accountable, so if you can accomplish something with a bit of pressure then set a deadline. It’s how I was able to complete Gold Embers Touch the Blue Veil. I was so unmotivated recently. I always came home tired and nothing creative would come to me. But I said, “Nope, we’re doing this.” Because I knew if I just wrote something (i.e. drafted to draft) then I would feel better later because I gave myself a foundation. With that foundation and when I’m feeling frivolous with my words, I can now accomplish so much more because I have something to work with.

I don’t have a schedule. I write based on when the ideas come to me. How can I fit writing into my existing schedule? I always write a storyboard, then I tackle it from there, so start to finish always varies. Often my stories can take weeks if not a month or two to write. I take a few days break sometimes so that way I’m not hypercritical of everything I’ve written. I never rush to put out something for the sake of putting it out there. Rushing never usually gives good results.

There is no bad idea either. Don’t go into a story you’re about to write already knocking it down. Remember, write for yourself, I swear to you, if you enjoy what your writing someone else will too. You think J.K Rowling wrote HP thinking, “Ahhh, I need to change all this because my mind is telling me someone may not like this.” Hell no. She wrote her story the way she saw it and it’s amazing because it’s her.  

Methodology:

Write a storyboard. Will you for sure remember the thing you told yourself to remember in the morning? Did you forget to write down that appointment? Did you remember that you have that assignment due if you didn’t write it down? The majority will say they don’t. That’s why I’m a huge believer in having a “story board”. What that means to me personally is mapping out how you want the story to go. I personally can’t use the write-and-go method. I need structure so I can reference back and tweak it later. So, I recommend opening up a doc or whatever you have to use and follow this set up. It’s concise, keeps things neat and easy to follow. It’s basically a flow chart but a bit more professional. I’m sure you can find other templates, but this is mine.

Write about something you want, not something you think would get notes. Write it because you see that niche isn’t being filled, or if you want to add to that genre. As an example, there are a million and one coffee shop AU's, but what can you add?

Other things to keep in mind is the hero’s journey doesn’t have to be linear, Try to teach, teach the readers and yourself something. That way you keep something fresh for yourself. Grow each time you finish something. Whether you know it or not, you grow a little bit each time. Your opinions will change and grow, so take it all in stride.

With all that knowledge you’ll become a better writer because you’ll be able to see a wider breadth of ideas and put in details that don’t always seem obvious and develop your own style.

I’m sorry that this post was long and that I got preachy. But from my writing style, I guess you could already have predicted I would’ve done this, huh? Haha. I hope this was helpful!! Feel free to send me an ask if you have any more questions.

[violetsystems]

#personal

If anybody can trust anything about my time on earth, it's how many times I've stood up and called bullshit on things. This includes my own life often times and the last two years especially has been telling. I definitely had the vision for myself to move beyond things far before they ever collapsed. Back at the start of 2017 I flew to New York with intentions of restarting my music career sober. Five years later, nothing works including me. I think of music and blogging more as lily pads than anything. You assume people don't want to hire someone down the line that is a complete Borg. I've rewritten my resume eighteen times since I was let go from my job of twenty years. The entire time I've felt like I was selling myself to a brick wall. I come up with ideas to pass the time. The cybersecurity mixtape was a real attempt at bookending my careers so I could move on. To promote it, I took to Facebook of which I had been locked out of due to my old job hijacking my email address without warning. I've spent so much of my time proving I exist that I've renewed my passport with ten forms of identification. This was years ago but I have all the papers including a weird picture from a newspaper of me receiving confirmation at a church. But losing your Facebook without your consent is like being zeroed out completely. When it comes to proving you are still a live, a head shot on Facebook is the nail in the coffin. Everybody comes out of the woodwork. People who have been silent for years at this point. I read all these paragraph long job acceptance posts on LinkedIn often. "I was just like you. I was ghosted by the world and coworkers. I know how it feels when it happened to me. But after eight years I got the job with the arm and hammer company. Baking soda is your friend." And people ceremoniously congratulate you. I post a photo to my unlocked Facebook account with over a thousand friends and it's more a funeral than a parade. No one asks specifically what I've been doing. How I've been suffering. They want you to show the weakness so they can console and feel good about it. And the cast of people is the most telling. My old boss who left before they hired a CIO who fired everyone worth a shit is on there. He knows the pain more than anyone. That same boss and photo teacher that defended my ex girlfriend even after we broke up and she was fired from the job I helped her get. I helped a lot of people get jobs over the years. Some still work at the institution I got let go from. There's the very first girl I dated who was a recovering heroin addict who married the skinhead that excommunicated me back in college at the local denny's. Real top quality trash there. There's the people I met from Finland wandering South Korea alone who were probably spies. The day after I hung out with them in Seoul my room at the hostel was flooded with bed bugs. He had the nerve to ask how I was doing in spire of everything. I didn't answer. Why not ask your prime minister how it feels to be free enough to party?

America expects you to do all the heavy lifting when it comes to networking and pursuit of happiness. It says the key to your future is excavating the grave site of your past. And I often try to appear as if everything is normal and I am indeed alive. But the scientific method has proven to me more than once at my age that the past is an eyesore. You can always feel the vibe emanating from it like the stench in a graveyard from a zombie movie. You get ghosted and reconnect out of sanity. It's all waiting there with nothing relevant to say. People who have never clicked on anything you've ever shared are there because the algorithms curated your head shot. A highly contrasted and easy to parse avatar for whatever facial recognition keeps tabs on our identities across the globe. I keep up these pretentions because I don't want to be jobless forever. And yet the things I do are beyond the bare minimum other people contribute. You see, I know how much more talented I am next to everyone. Because I know how much I have risked in years compared to some dipshit edge lords on the internet half my age. I know how many times I've been followed around the world and swindled. I know how much of my information floats out there every day that people gape at. They talk constant shit behind my back because they have nothing better to do. And they have created largely a shadow like batman. A whisper of what I'm really capable of. And this scares the basic ass normal motherfuckers who thought they were better than me. I am myself. No one is like me. I have spent decades defending myself against the discourse cokeheads throw around idly in the club. And what do they actually have to show for it? Bullshit. Excuses. Mantras. Pre rehearsed arguments. Pranks. And I have to stand here for years and entertain a roast that never comes. I am never reconnecting to my past other than to have a super computer verify that I have nothing to do with anything but my own responsibilities for my own actions. I have no baggage from the past to take with me anywhere. I have nothing but horror and better judgement. People knew where I was all this time. And nobody in real life reached out. They set up a fake, cardboard town around me wondering if they could engineer a reconnection. Some reality show to profit off like disaster capitalism. Alec Baldwin presents the assistant director now streaming on peacock starring hologram Anne Heche. The big reveal in that show is to find out that those people are deathly afraid of something they don't understand. That they participated in my exit interview. Staged it for the cameras. And that my time as undercover boss putting up with any of this shit is ancient history.

I wouldn't ever say that about the people I've spent time with here on Tumblr. It's much different in a bizarre way. Although I've brought a lot of heat on myself in the real world for being open and honest. Everybody wants to test their mediocre beliefs about themselves on me. And if you know that this is just the same old cycle of jealousy, you know how bored I am with it. I hate it out here. I hate how people are so hyper fixated on the present that they don't realize it's worse than it was for me when you thought I was cool. Everything is fucking mediocre. Nobody tries. Everybody gets together and complains and does nothing about it. Nobody sees how confrontational and stupid things have become. You can't even enter your apartment without the garbage man trying to prove he's better than you because he has a job. I do have a job. I own a company. I never said it was profitable. I make a podcast about patches and then the next day every news media outlet is talking about patching your operating system like it's the end of the world. People know who I am. They make it a point to be seen like they're important enough to talk to whenever I take out my trash. They fucking steal ideas from me and never give me credit. Never throw me a bone. This has happened for decades and I have come to realize that this is America. A place that lies, cheats and acts nice about it so that you feel bad calling it out on it's punk ass bullshit. You need to get over feeling angry about knowing your worth. And people don't know how hard to hit back. There's a point when you no longer need to swing the bat. You are waiting for the umpire to call the walk. And here I am sitting at home plate every day spending my entire life savings waiting for somebody to acknowledge that I'm worth something. That's intentional. They want to break you down. They want me to believe that I'm nothing. And this is simply not fucking true. I'm about the only person on this website who wouldn't lie to you after what I've been through. Any one who talks shit about me who has never stared me in the eyes is a limp dick, flaccid pussy of an individual. And you need to start treating them as such. Because this doesn't get better for any of us if I go down like Jesus for a bunch of billionaires who dodge taxes in his name. Amen. <3 Tim

[deewithani]

Just a general 18+ content warning here, nothing really explicit, but more under the cut regarding what most would consider offensive and violent tropes in smut fiction, and general talk about discourse. Not in response to any one thing happening here, but general observations over the past year or so, since I haven't been here very long. Also talk about discourse on other platforms.

I'm also not posting this to discourage discourse, only to point out that not all reactions to discourse are equal to the issue that is being discussed. There is very legitimate discourse in fandom that needs to be brought to light and discussed, and this is not to minimize that needed discourse.

Long post ahead.

Tumblr is so weird. I'm not talking about the site, I'm talking about all of us on here.

We're weird.

There's so much "no, don't do that" here that doesn't exist on any other site. It's like coming to another world.

I don't do much with Twitter, I really only use it for news, but it's full of p*rn. Just straight up p-in-v right there. And discourse about just about everything. Political discourse capital of the universe. I stay away away because I mostly hate it. I did find out about Vince McMahan paying to cover up an affair though (how did this surprise literally anyone?), which I probably wouldn't have otherwise, so it has its uses. But people stay on Twitter, because discourse is expected and is likely wanted by a lot of the daily users. Arguments and anger and "our side" and "their side" is what their users want.

Then there's Facebook. Everyone I know personally seems to have decided to out idiot each other (this is a regional issue related to politics, so ymmv). There is discourse in comment threads of public posts, but not so much in individual user posts.

But back to FB. Y'all. I read a lot. I read 6 books at a time (1 chapter each a day), of various genres.

I read smut. Erotica. You know. It's not the only thing I reas, but I do read it. And I can, because I'm allowed to make that decision for myself.

I'm a member of a few different groups where book recommendations are their primary reason for being. Groups with tens of thousands of members and that extremely active (note that I am not going to name any of these groups).

Sounds tame. It's really not. Some of these groups are a completely different world.

We know that Tumblr is different and that social media is different outside of Tumblr. But I really mean that it's different. Even discourse is different.

I'm going to put a cut here, because content warning things are below here (and a small mention of an anthromorphic spider).

And my apologies for going in so many directions as this. But this is kind of about why interaction is so low here, and that's because Tumblr is gonna Tumblr, and it's not a safe space for anyone and never will be no matter how hard anyone fights about it.

Without fail, each of the FB groups have a don't like, don't look, don't comment rule.

Someone posted an anthromorphic spider with a partner in a compromising position, asking for recs. Not my thing, but surprisingly to me lots of replies.

And any time I've seen any discourse about anything anyone has asked for, it's been shut down so fast that I rarely see what originally caused the issue.

But I saw the discourse on a request once before the the replying user was banned.

The OP had asked for a book rec that included some pretty dark things. This is your warning before moving forward.

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.

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The OP asked for a book rec that included non-con, kidnapping, forced pregnancy, and several other tropes that pushed it well into the "are you ok, op?" area for me. Definitely nothing that I would read or would have any idea of recs for. But recs were given to the OP, until one user asked, essentially, "wtf is wrong with you op? this is disgusting and you are disgusting for asking for it."

Nuked. From. Orbit. Replier was kicked so fast they probably had no idea they were already gone.

Nothing like that could happen here. That response would be atypical here. Anger would only grow from each side, everyone deciding they were in the right in an argument that wouldn't even be a blip on the radar anywhere else.

Here, there would probably be fights in the comments. We've seen these comments. People with differing views of the request would be accused of being the worst type of people in existence. I wouldn't be surprised to see people telling others to off themselves. It would explode into whatever fandom it lives in, and after multitudes of anon messages and deactivates accounts, it would eventually settle down, with the battle lines more clearly drawn and the more casual fans covering their heads to keep from getting hit with the fallout at best, or leaving at worst.

I've seen the absolute grossest takes from both sides of issues here. There is no way to be ignorant of anything because you have to be on one side or another, and if you're not explicitly on one side, you are one of the others, and that just can't happen.

And before anyone says "well, that's because the other side is obviously wrong", I'M TALKING ABOUT THE OTHER SIDE TOO.

It doesn't matter what it is. It doesn't matter the fandom. It doesn't matter the issue.

I have literally seen discourse about whether Captain Rex's hair was dyed or natural blonde. As if this is an issue that matters and not some way to put another line out there to make people prove they're enjoying fandom the right way.

I'm not in the Encanto fandom, but if I wanted to be I'm sure there's some terrible discourse going on, and I would have to align with one side or another because that's expected. It doesn't matter what the discourse is, it doesn't matter what my view is. This side is right and that side is wrong. Period. There is no room for any sort of discussion on my part, because the discussion has already happened before I arrived and the lines have been drawn and you have to choose the side you're going to be on.

I'm not in BTS fandom, but it's there. I'm not in OFMD fandom, but I'm sure it's there too.

And this happens for every fandom. You don't have to be part of a specific fandom to know that it does.

And in the midst of all the fandom discourse we're missing legitimate problems because of the voice they're coming from. Legitimate discourse, problematic users. All because of the side that their on.

The absolute refusal to accept an apology from the other side for their misdeads, while simultaneously closing your eyes to the issues on your side, accepting each apology without question. Because everyone makes mistakes, right? At least as long as they're on your side. Those people on the other side are irredeemable. Their apologies are fake. They'll never learn. Because they are problematic and wrong and you can't fix that.

But we are all problematic. There is no way not to be. And if you think you're not, you're not looking at yourself critically.

I am not unproblematic and I know it. And I try every day to do better than I did yesterday. But I will never be perfect. There is no such thing as perfection. And to someone, somewhere on this site I may be irredeemable. That I don't deserve happiness. That If I had a minor child, I deserve to have them taken away from me. I may not even deserve to live in their eyes. I hope that no one sees me that way, but I've seen others make these comments for far less, in replies, in reblogs, in messages, and in anons.

We act like we are at war and the other side is our enemy and we wonder why no one interacts anymore. Why fandom is dying here, so to speak. Lumping everyone who isn't "us" into "them"

We are toxic. We are problematic. And we're trying to pretend that we're not, that we're so much better than the other side, no matter what the other side is. That they're the problem. We are all the problem.

I stepped back some recently, but came back because I missed it, but honestly, I didn't come here to fight with anyone. I'm sure most everyone else originally did the same, no matter what side of what issue they're on. But you can't come here and interact and not fight. The only way to not fight is to not interact.

And everyone wonders why interaction is so low.

[lunartflare64]

Here we go! Original idea 2! Whoop!

Let's start with the world. This is thousands of years after the Earth is swallowed up by the sun, humans left on a large ship that can support many generations to find a new planet. They finally arrive on a planet much bigger than Earth, which is also much further from the sun than Earth was. To make matters more difficult this planet relies heavily on sunlight, which lead to it developing sentience (sort of) in order to have better control and access to sunlight.

The planet learned that moving life can have much better access to sunlight than plants, and so it made a connection to larger creatures, indigenous to the planet or no. These creatures walk the land of the planet and keep up with the sunlight, and in return the planet shares a portion of the sun's vitamins and nutrition from the planet itself. On top of that, foreign creatures who want to stay but can't breathe the air are given their own breathable air, given some time for trial and error to figure out what they need to breathe.

With the majority of the planet being in ultimate darkness 90% of the time, bioluminescence became very popular for the planet and it's inhabitants. It keeps the creatures with eyes made for the day happy, sane, and alive.

Back to the humans, they finally come to this planet, ready to terraform it and move in, but when they find the thriving life the humans become divided, most wanting to terraform, but some wanting to live on the planet the way it is. The terraformers consider the planet's symbiosis to be parasitic, that the planet is taking more than it's fair share and that it could easily possess you, controlling your thoughts and convincing you that the planet means no harm. Obviously the terraformers consider everyone against them to be possessed already. The supporters of the planet on the other hand are seeing other creatures come to this planet and live healthy and happily, and know that killing this life is wrong.

And now we have Imani (last name still being worked on, I haven't found any sites with a proper list of African surnames, I've read that names are very important in Africa so I also want to find the right last name that suits her and her family), she's a planet supporter, on the ship she worked with her father on making plans to terraform their new home, but the life on the planet quickly changed her mind. Her father on the other hand is a firm terraformer, when he realized that his daughter had been "possessed" he grew distant from her, and eventually they cut off contact altogether.

Years passed, and one day while her father was clearing out the land he came across a tribe of creatures, and found his daughter among them, fully "possessed" and one with the planet. With her was a child, half human and half alien, the father was another foreigner who had become one with the planet. Imani and her partner were the leaders of their tribe, making sure everyone was correctly connected to the planet and keeping everyone moving with the sunlight.

Imani's father decided to reconnect with his daughter, and allowed her to talk about her life with the planet and the tribe. She tells him about how the tribe felt like a family, about how they liked to play a lot of games in the sun, how they helped newcomers settle in, and how much she looked forward to the day they'd meet and he'd understand that the planet really does mean no harm. They (him, Imani, and her baby daughter) went out for a walk to talk one day, and once they were far enough from the tribe, he turns to Imani, who is talking about how the planet likes to put on light shows, and he kills her. He sprays her with salt water to kill her connection to the planet and then stabs her to kill her actual body. He cleans the blood off the baby and takes her back to the village, telling them that Imani died from a lack of nutrients from the planet.

As the baby grows, he frequently visits the tribe, feeding her mind with lies about the planet and her connection with it. Planning to destroy the planet from the inside out with one of it's own trusted locals.

------

And that's all I've got so far! To be honest this all came in a dream over the weekend, what most stands out in my memory is him killing Imani, she begs him to understand how wrong his choices are as she dies, she doesn't even focus on him killing her, she just wants him to stop for the tribe and the planet's sake. She was so sure that she could change his mind, even after he stabbed her, I woke up crying.

Now, this is my first time trying to draw a human in general, so please take it easy on me if there are problems, especially with her skin, I did my best to find tutorials but there weren't as many as there were for white people. Imani appeared in my dream as a black woman so I'm going to stick to that even if I don't know how to draw people in general yet. I'm not going to whitewash my own dream.

Are you ready for the list of things I researched just while drawing this?

Symbiosis in bioluminescence

Mutualistic symbiosis

Chlorophyll

Chlorophyll in wood

Africa

Swahili names

African last names (because from what I've gathered they speak their last names with the same pronunciation, still didn't get me much results)

A lot of mini searches to get the words for the above searches (I'm a highschool dropout what do you want from me)

Also, sorry I assaulted your dash, I'm on the mobile app, I don't have that cut thingy

[bloggerbro]

Free online jobs for students without investment

Official Site

Welcome back to my Article today we're going to be Read about seven online jobs that you can do it home that pay at least one hundred dollars per day.

For latest Update Subscribe Our Blog now...! It's Free Free Free....!!

 I'm really excited to be sharing this list with you today, guys, because i know that you always love when i've share ideas for how you could make money at home,and i've done a few different Article like this in the past.

One of them was some of the highest paying work at home jobs and then another one was some of the easiest or get home jobs, but today i just wanted to break it down really simply share seven jobs that pay at least one hundred dollars, her day, because i know that that is kind of a minimum out that a lot of people would want to earn to make working at home a truly viable option for supporting themselves full time now, the only things that these jobs really have in common are you khun do them from home and they will pay you at least one hundred dollars per day.

                                   

 Aside from that, this is a really eclectic list that includes a lot of different options that would appeal to really different types of people, so if the first couple of jobs don't appeal to you, just keep on watching because i'm sure that you will find one that will be great fit for you and one last thing before reed eminent the list of jobs if you'v been around here it all, then you probably know that every month i teach on online workshop and one of my most popular workshops ever has been my how to get started making money online workshop and this month i decided to do something really special and actually offering a slightly condensed version of that workshop completely for free. 

Now normally i charge any where between thirty and two hundred dollars for these workshops just depending on what the topic is and how extensive they're going to be. But this workshop has been so popular and it seems to be topic that you guys were so interested in that i decided to offer,like i said, a condensed version of it for free. So if that's something you're interested in, then just keep Read until the end of the video and i will be sure to share all the details of that with you all right, so let's jump on in and talk about the seven jobs that you can do from home that will pay you at least one hundred dollars per day the first job on my list is bookkeeper now a bookkeeper is just someone who helps a business or an individual keep their finances organized. 

                        

Basically, there are many different ways that you can learn how to become a book keeper you can actually get a two or a four year degree that will teach you everything you need to know, or there are lots of shorter term training programs that teach you how to be a bookkeeper and as little as three or six months, and there's also the option to actually just learn on the job booking burst typically earned about twenty dollars per hour and it's something that you cannot do from home, either for local clients or you can do from home, working with remote clients and communicating with the monline. 

                         

And just so you're aware there are different types of financial professions,such as an accountant or bookkeeper or financial advisor, and many of them do require some type of certification or other prerequisite, but there actually isn't any such restrictionson being a bookkeeper. 

Anyone can be a book keeper as long as they know what they're doing.Job number two is something that i love to include, because i think it pays a lot more than a lot of people realize and that's to be a Article. Now, clearly, i have a Article and it's, one of my sources of income, my Article right now, with about seventy five thousand subscribers, is paying me a bit over three thousand dollars per month,and i think that seventy five thousand subscribers is a number that really, anyone can attain if they put in the work and they learn what it takes to become successful on Article.

                         

The reason that i mentioned that my channel makes three thousand dollars a month is because that is equivalent to one hundred dollars a day. 

However, just for reference, i'll share that when my channel on lee had about twenty thousand subscribers, i wass making about fifteen hundred or so dollars every single month, which is a quite decent wage for someone who has a very small you t j also, i can't not mention that even though is one hundred dollars per day it's a lot more per hour than a lot of these other jobs, because i only put about two hours per day into running my Article, so that means that i'm turning around fifty dollars an hour. 

                                   

If you want to learn more about how to start a Article and make money from it, then i'll leave a link there in the corner and probably couple down below. Also, i have a few different videos. One is all about the behind the scenes of my Article analytics, and i share exactly how much i make each month, and then in another Article, i share tips on starting you to channel that actually makes money. The third job on my list is that of transcriber now transcriber is someone who listens to audio. This could be audio from a speaker at a conference or simply someone reciting something that they want to be Subscribe. 

There's definitely a lot of different applications of this and there's also a whole lot of websites that helped to facilitate people who work as transcribers,finding work of transcribers with people who want to hire a transcriber. Now, typically,a transcriber earns an average of about thirty dollars per hour. It depends on which website you go with. Some pay as little as nine dollars per hour, and some pay as much as about fifty dollars per hour, but i'll leave links to several of those Article. 

                         

Job number four is chat customer service now a lot of people don't like answering thephone, and even though they're aware that there are a lot of jobs they could do from home, answering the phone for different cos they don't really want to go that route, buta great alternative is to be a chat customer service representative. The main difference is you don't actually have to talk to the people on the phone instead, you're just chatting with them over the internet, and you're probably used this service many times.

 If you've triedto contact a company such as most any clothing or technology company on the internet these days, many companies hire people to work from home and provide these services to their customers,and they typically pay around fifteen dollars per hour. And again, oliva, linked to a fewre source, is that you can check out to learn more about these chat customer service job opportunities down in the description. 

                        

The fifth job on my list is something very specific,but i think it might appeal to a lot of people it's to be ah home stylist for stitch fixor for some similar service. Now what the services dio is they offer custom selected pieces of clothing to customers and the home stylists take a look at the customers, profile it aside, what piece is the person who might be interested in buying and wearing and then stitch fix actually sends them out to the customer. 

Now the reason i mentioning stitch fix in particular is because they've actually publicly shared information about the fact that they hire people like this and the fact that they pay them about fifteen dollars an hour to do this work from home and, of course, only the link down below where you can find out more information about stitch fix is well.

 Job number six on my list is to be an online course creator now all the jobs on my list this one probably has the most wildly vary in income most of these other jobs i can say you know you'll get paid about fifteen dollar san hour or about thirty dollars an hour but as an online course creator there is so much opportunity for growth and you can make an enormous amount of money i mean we're talkin gtens of thousands of dollars every month if you're really good at it but if you are good at it then you might make no money however that being said if you use a proven strategy for building your brand and getting yourself out there and you make it decently good courses.

                        

Then you can easily expect to earn about five to ten thousand dollars per month if you want to learn more about how to become an online course creator and the strategy is to use to actually become successful at it on the best resource i can probably recommend to you is for you to join the free workshop that i'm doing soon so just stick around till the end of the video so that i can share with you exactly what's going on that and how you can join it all right and the seventh and final job on my list is that a virtual assistant now what a virtual assistant does is they help someone too basic tasks, such as answeringe mail will our proof reading or may be working on managing a small project, and they do soremotely, of course, there's loss of executives and other types of professionals that have assistants who work in the office. 

But these days, with a lot of people working from home,there is a big job opportunity for people to do virtual assistant now, a common objection that i've gotten when i have shared his people. 

The opportunity of being a virtual assistant is that there is a lot of competition, and lots of people basically are trying to be virtual assistance, even if they're not very qualified, and that that can really drive down the possibility for making money in this way. However, based on the experience of many of my clients, i would say it all depends on how your marketing yourself and where,if you're just listing yourselves on a site like freelancer dot com or up work dot com,then you probably can't expect to make more than about seven or twelve dollars per hour,which probably would not be enough for most people, however, there are other sites that helped to connect more skilled virtual assistance with people who are looking for virtual assistants who they can really count on. 

And if you sign up with one of these services and they helped to place you with a good client, then you can earn a whole lot more at least fifteen dollars per hour, if not twenty or twenty five or thirty dollars per hour. And of course,there's always the other option of building up your own network and finding clients that way.

And typically virtual assistants who go about their marketing in that way earned between twenty and thirty dollars per hour. All right, so that brings us to the end of my list of seven, jobs that you can do working for home that pay you at least one hundred dollars. Now first off in one of those jobs stood out to you. We're seemed interesting

Then make sure you leave me calm it down below just to share and then beyond that, if you have any questions about how to get started with one of those jobs. Also, i'd love to see it com in from you down there. I answer as many comments as i possibly can some days that is every comment i get other days, i can't get to them, but i answer as many as i can, so if you have a question, please leave it down below.

 And if i can help you, quite possibly someone else can. Also, of course, if you like this video, please hit the thumbs up button to let me know if that will help me know that she want to see more videos like this in the future, and it also helps other people find this video to all right. And then finally, i just want to share with you about the free workshop that i am doing very soon.As i mentioned, i teach these live workshops online every single month, and the most popular one that i've ever died is called how to get started making money online.

In this workshop,i really teach the entire system that i use with my clients to help them first build an audience and then monetize that audience and then scaled their business it's, a seven steps structure that really makes the process of building an online business quite black and white so that anyone can do it now. 

The bestselling version of this workshop is almost two hours long, and i really go into the nuts and bolts of it. But because this workshop has been so popular and it seems like you guys are enjoying it so much, i wanted to bring you kind of a condensed version to really walk you through the framework and help you understand the big picture of making money online.

                            

 So on a thursday, june fourteenth, i am going to be doing a lot one hour version of my house to get started making money. Online workshop this one hour work fat will be completely free, and i'm gonna put a link down below where you can sign up.

The workshop will be held on thursday, june fourteenth, at elevena m pacific standard time. And if you want even more details than just make sure you click that link down below, and i'll share some of the details of exactly what will be going over and exactly how you conjoined. If you're interested in learning how to get started making money online and finally be able to really take control of your life and take control of your schedule, then i invite you to join us for the workshop. Thank youso much for joining us for today's video. My name is gillian perkins, and i look forward seeing you again next time

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[eds-zebra-warrior]

Ehlers Danlos Society Awareness Month (Day 31 Community)

Not all health conditions have what they call a community or a group of others with the same condition coming together as a group to be with, support and help one another. Let's be honest, most conditions don't need a community. There's a lot of conditions that are very cut and dry and easy to understand. There's a group on Facebook for everything but I can tell you right now there's not going to be a ton of people in a Hemorrhoid support group. The EDS group is a very close knit group with much value and importance to those who are part of it and I'll be explaining some of those reasons.

Of course one of the most obvious with having a rare disease is to be able to meet someone like you. To know others exist and to share similar experiences with. You know you can always find someone there that truly understands what you're going through having a condition so disabling you tend to lose most, if not all of your friends, some even lose family. Rather it be due to lack of understanding, lack of belief, fear, or any other list of reasons it seems to happen to all of us. So this is a way to make friends just like us. Friends that won't resent us for the physical abilities we have lost or the lifestyle changes placed on us by this syndrome.

Another reason is well because it's rare. It's surprisingly difficult to find any good information about EDS on the internet when you first get diagnosed unless you know where to look. In addition to this being a condition that lacks studies and research it's also extremely complex. In fact before being diagnosed, even with going to nursing school, I had no idea something this complex existed. If you are ever trying to find reliable information about a specific aspect of EDS it may be really hard to find, especially if the topic you're looking for is very specific. You can go into groups. A lot of individuals have certain documents bookmarked or saved in a word document or spreadsheet and can lead you in the right direction. If we can't find a study done in something we can also use support groups to do our own informal studies. Just simply create a pole and let everyone chime in. Before you know it, if posted in a larger group you'll go check out your pole and may have two or three hundred answers to your question.

Next, with EDS pretty much any body structure is a free game which means lots and lots of comorbidities. A good number of comorbidities are common amongst us which means we always have someone to relate to and ask questions to. In addition to this you can expand your groups to include groups for people with those comorbidities further extending your knowledge and possibility of friends. Most doctors don't know anything about these conditions so that leaves it to us to learn everything there is to know about it. When you finally think you have read everything there is on the web, others read thousands of sites or journals you haven't come across and ones you have read they didn't know existed so it's all about learning together and having people who understand.

Being a condition that is so very painful and severely affects sleep as well as causing many of us great depression and guilt for what we've lost and the deterioration our body has been through as well as the feeling of loss. We feel guilty for everything we put out families through, for needing help, for canceling plans and letting people down. Not only as if what we once were has already passed away but also the loss of friends, many times every single one we had before this illness and sometimes family members. We grieve the loss and are angry to learn that people we thought were our best friends and would never leave disappointed in us like a used paper plate. This is also the time it dawns on us how many of these people used us when we were healthy to provide them with things we need. Most of us have OCD or are on the high functioning side of the Autism Spectrum so tend to take responsibility and do things right, including not letting down our friends and family very seriously. Most of us thrive on routine and rules and chronic illness often gets to a point that a lot of this is no longer possible forcing us to make decisions last minute, change them or cancel them last minute, not be able to complete things by a time we have set for ourselves etc and that's really hard. It's helpful to know others who are or have been going through the same thing and to know you're not alone, not the one letting yourself and others down and to be told it's okay and it's not our fault.

The majority of us also have Medical Trauma Induced Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. We spent years of our lives rather you're lucky and got diagnosis in two years or ate 70 and have spent the last 55 years actively seeking a diagnosis we all have to fight for one, to see doctor after doctor and oftentimes the worst part of it all, be miss diagnosed with psychiatric disorders such as anxiety and Conversion Disorders. These are extremely dangerous and life threatening diagnosis for us because it essentially closes the door on even looking for a cause of what is going wrong with us. Conversion Disorder is a Diagnosis given after all other conditions have been ruled out the problem is, doctors use it as a crutch to not have to deal with us. We are also superstars, especially in the beginning at having beautiful results when it comes to basic blood tests such as a CBC. The problem is, again, doctors are known to cut corners because they like the majority of mankind are lazy creatures who tend to want to just get the job done. It doesn't matter if it's thoroughly done and done with utmost care to put as much effort into it as they can, it's just done and to them done is good enough so they do the common tests and call it done, close the book and slap a label of conversion disorder on us that follows us around for life for every other doctor to use as an excuse to say they are done too. It takes years to find a doctor who is in it for the better of the patient; one who is up for a challenge; one who is willing to do more testing and testing that is more advanced and most importantly, a doctor who believes us and is willing to go the extra mile. It's when these less common tests like a Tilt Table Study, Gastric Emptying Study, Urodynamics Testing, Upright MRIs instead of doing them in the prone position, Sweat Testing, a Sitzmark Colon Transit Time Study, a 24 hour urine test to measure histamine levels, skin biopsies and ultimately EDS Testing via either the Brighton score system along with a through study of the body and some questions used to determine a positive or negative diagnosis or Genetic Testing to determine a type of EDS that has a genetic mutation that has been discovered. Not all forms of EDS have had their genetic mutation discovered yet which is why the other study is so important. There are more tests that can be utalkzss than the ones mentioned but as you can see, none of these are tests that are done on a routine basis and a lot of doctors don't want to deal with them slapping the psychological, "all in our head" diagnosis on us prematurely.

This results in us without a diagnosis for what we have going on with our body. When this happens we aren't receiving treatment for the symptoms we are experiencing allowing them to escalate. To make things worse we are often given the wrong treatments, handed antipsychotic medications that cause even more adverse symptoms and don't work. When they don't work the doses are increased higher and higher resulting in more to go wrong with our bodies. This also closes the door to treatment causing doctors and hospitals to dismiss life threatening issues, sending us home when we are actually so sick we should be in the ICU. I myself was declared clinically dead at least 10 times before my diagnosis, four because my heart stopped and I went into cardiac arrest and the rest because my blood pressure would drop below 60/20 which in the medical field is a pressure that is considered legally dead. With all but one of these I was sent home within an hour to a few hours of it happening simply told that was weird and sent home on paperwork for Conversion Disorder, Hypochondriasis, or some other psychosomatic disorder and is I was lucky this would sent me discharging me with a diagnosis of low blood pressure and that was that. One of my codes my mom was in the room, thank God for her. When I code no one came. My mom went running down the hall begging for help pleading for a nurse to help because no one was running to my room. The nurse told her I'm probably faking it and just pulled my leads off and told my mom just to ignore me because people like me feed on attention. My mom ran back to the room and thank God had some medical training as a girl scout leader because she had to take first aid and CPR. My mom brought me back. The nurse walked in right after and checked my wires. They are still in place. My state as well as several others protect their medical personnel against malpractice suits so there was nothing we could do. I've been sent home with gastric ischemia which is a life threatening condition where the blood pressure increases to dangerous levels in the intestines. It can cause the pressures to get so high it bursts and dissects blood vessels in the intestines causing a person to bleed to death. I was sent home with a diagnosis of General Psychosis and Anorexia as well as treated for anemia and vitamin deficiency. They blamed it on anorexia, not the fact I physically couldn't eat and was having bowel movements that were nothing but pure blood that everyone. Refused to look at. I had an allergic reaction so bad it almost killed me and was sent home diagnosed with conversion disorder and sent to my doctor who wanted me in ICU but upon refusal from the hospital to see me again even with my vitals so poor my doctor had to take care of me basically sending me home with what I called a take home hospital and working with my mom over the phone to take care of me available all hours of the night. I had a nurse try to give me 50 times the dose of this same medication that caused this. Been sent home with intestinal blockages, hernias, extreme dehydration, a UTI after they said the results came back negative only to get them in the mail a week later to see they were positive and by that time my UTI was so severe I had a kidney infection and was in kidney failure. I've sat there days and nights in a hospital bed where nurses refuse to answer my call light saying I have a conversion. Disorder, don't need to be there and I'm wasting their time and resources taking up a bed for someone who is really sick and that they won't be coming anymore the rest of the night not knowing I was one of the sickest ones on the ward and just misdiagnosed. I've had nurses rip IVs out of my arm, ya know how they push you to your car when you're released? There are a lot of times they pull my IV, tell me I'm not sick anyway and can do it myself having to take multiple trips to get my personal belongings out of my room. When I lost the ability to walk I had multiple doctors tell me I could and would pick me up, put my feet on the ground and the. Let go of

dropping me on the floor. This happened a lot at OSU with their doctors. Again and again dropping me and seeing I didn't have that natural response to catch myself and went straight into the hard tile floor with my fragile and damaged connective tissue would they say hmm. You really can't walk then send another doctor in who would do the exact same thing. I got picked up and dropped four times by four different neurologists just in the first week of being paralyzed and it's happened time and time again after that at other neurology appointments. I could go on and on. This is the stuff a lot of us go through. It's extremely common with EDS, most of us have complex PTSD.

Most of us have an extreme fear of going to the hospital because that's when we are at our worst and at the same time, a time we get treated worse than anywhere else about our chronic illness. We go in knowing it's a game of Russian Roulette with a really high chance we will be sent home sicker than I came in. Worst of all, there's no way to treat our PTSD because it had to be treated by a doctor, the people we have the least trust in. Not only that but the cruel mistreatment never ends. Every hospital visit. I have had good nurses before but I have never gone to the hospital once where I can say everyone was good. I hear a lot of healthy individuals say endless good things about the hospital staff they had or they have some reason they have to go. When you have a rare invisible illness like EDS we aren't given that same care. The appalling lack of medical care never ends therefore it's impossible to even treat our PTSD. It's not like someone in the military who is in a war and when the war is over, it's done, they never have it go back and can get treatment and start to heal. It's like having to live the rest of their lives in that war as a POW who has been captured and imprisoned by the enemy and every time they get out they are found and imprisoned by another enemy and another enemy and then going to see a psychologist who happens for this only to find out the psychologist is one of those enemies from the other side who captures and holds others line you as POWs yet wants to try to help you get over everything that has happened to you even though you're still occasionally been tending by someone else and beat up before getting away again. Seeing a psychologist for us just doesn't work. We have no trust in the medical field and the gross mistreatment and lack of care is never ending. The EDS community can relate to this when one else can. While the healthy people we know, the people we grew up with, who became nurses and doctors themselves get mad telling us those doctors and nurses are heroes, they can do no wrong. That stuff doesn't happen, they are made up of the most caring and compassionate individuals. Those in our community and other rare or invisible disease communities know that degree of mistreatment all too well. We know the truth about the medical field.

We know they are no different than any other company. Identical to the people making minimum wage in a more trivial position such as a greater at a retail store. There are the good ones who take their job very seriously and want to do their job to the best of their ability truly valuing hard work and are highly motivated individuals but most people at a job are just working because they have to. They have bills but if they were multimillionaires there's no way they would be there now. They want to get the job done and go home. It doesn't matter how they get it done, it's just got to be done. These are quantity over quality people. They take working smarter not harder totally wrong, defining it in their mind as taking any short cut necessary to get it done. Ya know how at most jobs they would have, for example, 50 people but there are three of them that seem to pull all the weight. The three everyone thinks takes things too seriously because they hardly leave their desk or station. They don't take the time to walk around socializing and joking around with their peers. When things get behind they are the ones who stress and work really hard to get things caught up where others say I'm not getting paid any more, I'm not going to bend over backwards and stress about if they aren't paying me more. The three people first to volunteer for overtime and the least to grumble of the boss asks them to stay over another 15 minutes to finish something while on the other days a boss May say that if you get your work done you can go hike and everyone rushed to gst the job done to get out the door while those three are left sitting there at their desks to get the job done right whole also correcting others work that was hastily submitted so they could go home or start the weekend early. Just because someone is in the medical field doesn't make them any different from those who hold other jobs. If most of them won five million dollars they would be out of there. Forget the two weeks notice, heck they don't have to work anymore. Someone else can take their patients. If they're told its slow and they can go home when all the patients are out then one more comes walking in the door as they are packing up their stuff there are a lot if doctors will look to the people who are still working and say hey, I'm about to head out of here, do you mind taking this last Patient? It's human nature.

As generations have gone on more and more people are lazy and the medical field is no exception. When you're chronically ill and have spent a lot of time in the hospital it gets really easy to spot those three people. The ones who if they were multimillionaires may cut back their hours but would never dream of leaving their job because their job means more than money to them. They take great pride in making people better, getting them diagnosed, saving lives and they can't see life another way. Those are the good ones. The good ones line any other job. They are far and few, they pull all of the weight, are walked on by other staff members, their managers usually fail to see their accomplishments as they don't spend a lot of time just hanging out with workers at a patient's expense. They are the ones who will advocate and fight for their patients to all ends but like any other job, maybe five percent or one percent or any other single digit percentage of the employees are these people so EDS patients my get one person on their care team that is amazing, maybe two but will never get a whole care team and it seems like the good ones get more far and few the higher the position. I've had more caring and compassionate house cleaning staff. STNA's, more good STNA's than LPN's, more LPN's seen to be there for the patient then RN's and more RN's. Doctors.

I don't think I've ever had a bad Volunteer at a hospital. The volunteers just love to be there for the patients, to put a smile on their faces and to know they made a difference in our lives. Rather it be to bring us a coloring book and crayons, their Emotional Support Dog around to visit us (which is my favorite) bring us a warm blanket or fill up our water containers. I've had one bring me a card and a flower in a small tube of water. The volunteers are there because they want to be there, not because they have to be there. It seems like the higher the person is on the pay scale the more people are in it for the money. Money talks even if it's at the patient's expense and usually if you have a complicated or invisible illness like EDS you are the expenditure. A community is important to know we aren't alone, to share their experiences, some in the group have become medical advocates and will fight for others in their area who can't get the help they need. These advocates, especially the ones with lots of training are invaluable to the EDS community. They may not be able to fix our problems but it's nice to know there is someone out there who tried. When you're at your worst advocating for yourself is extremely difficult and sometimes impossible and oftentimes our families don't do a lot of research on their own so aren't able to advocate for us so having someone who can is more beneficial than words.

As you can see there are so many different reasons community is important and vital to all of us. Some use it simply as a way to relate or a way to make friends like them after losing the friends they had before their health declined to the extent their healthier friends no longer could relate to them and left. Many are involved in the community to gather information and gain knowledge about their conditions. Support groups are also there to talk, especially with so many who have PTSD. We can't trust a psychologist, psychiatrist or therapist as they are medical professionals and talking to a live person is more fulfilling than writing a journal that no one reads. Sometimes it's as if these individuals, having gone through this themselves, know just want to say and how to help us. Some are there as a medical advocate in their area. Someone who can be there for them in medical situations or even just to give them advice as to what to say to make doctors listen, direct them who to contact if they aren't receiving appropriate care and what to do or ask for from our medical personnel. Some even use these groups to find names of doctors that work with EDS patients or places to go where they may be able to get help or even ideas of what treatments work for others with similar comorbidities. There's even a few groups out there run by people who were medical workers before EDS ravaged their body to an extent that they had to leave the field. It consists of disabled nurses, doctors, radiologists and various specialists. This group works to tell us if we need a second opinion. We can post test results or imaging onto the page and since legally they can't have a diagnosis since they aren't currently working they give what's called a "non expert opinion, telling us what they see or would suspect and if we need to see someone else. I find all of these viral and that's why I see the EDS community as not an invaluable and essential part of my life and wellbeing as an individual with Ehlers Danlos Syndrome.

[melancholic-pigeon]

Hello! Thank you for this— you brought up an important piece of the puzzle, which is that feedback culture between sites is very different, and hopping from one to the other can be quite jarring. I hope it's okay if I use this as a bit of a springboard. 

I'm really, really glad to hear this cleared some stuff up for you, and I hope you feel a little better about your kudos knowing this! Because you're right, it's not something that's necessarily intuitive, particularly if you're coming from a place where that just isn't a mechanic and it's not something you've seen before. 

What I'm getting at, though, is that it's less that two or three hundred people are afraid to send praise, and more that two or three hundred people have lives and context that the author cannot possibly know. Some of them are anxious, some of them aren't, but it doesn't really matter why, at the end of the day— what matters is that they have their own reasons, whatever they happen to be, and that's enough. 

The bit I really want to address, gently and with respect: 

I really miss the old times where people knew that getting a review was a pleasure for the writer, whether it was positive or constructive criticism (always politely though. Bad reviews for the sake of it and flames should be burned in hell), and if you commented on a misspell or on a mistake the author would actually be GRATEFUL that you did and wouldn't jump you and attack you saying that it's rude to spend your time to send them a correction that could avoid them embarrassment with other thousands readers reading the same mistake and thinking the same thing.

This ties back to the culture thing. 

Because this isn't entirely an issue of "the old days when people knew all writers like positive reviews and constructive criticism and were always grateful to get it" versus "new fandom culture where people attack you for pointing out a mistake". This is an issue where many people have said that they were never comfortable receiving unsolicited concrit to begin with, and simply hadn't felt as though they could say so safely. (For further reading on this, I recommend doing a term search for "criticism" in @ao3commentoftheday and @longlivefeedback 's archives.)

Giving unsolicited crit is a problem for the same reason guilting people about kudos/comments is a problem. 

You don't know the author's situation. You don't know what mood they're in. You don't know if they find minor typos embarrassing. You don't know how long it took them to work up the nerve to post. You don't know what kind of feedback they want unless they explicitly tell you. 

I, for one, would be pretty annoyed if someone corrected my grammar or punctuation in a fic I'd posted. For one thing, I never asked; for another, a stray comma or typo just doesn't really matter to me— for example, in my main series, I have over 100k words published, and if I tried to fix every single possible minor flaw, it would take a year and kill my motivation to write because I'd stagnate in the process of combing over the entire thing for errors that don't affect the overall readability. 

If that's enough to take someone out of my story to the point where they no longer enjoy it, I would heartily encourage them not to read my fics. I've also gotten "corrections" that were actually incorrect, that attempted to "fix" "mistakes" that weren't mistakes in the first place— they were deliberate stylistic tricks. 

(to be fair, google docs is the worst offender on this front, but I've gotten them from humans, too. 🥴)

I'm a bit prone to meandering, so I apologize for that. What I'm trying to condense is the idea that people have as many ways to do fandom as there are people doing fandom. We get in hot water when we assume everyone does things our way, because what's a huge confidence booster to one person could destroy someone else, and you can't know without asking.

I think a lot about the feedback debate in fandom.

And this comes from me having fallen into the "hits are people running away" spiral less than a year ago. I'm here because I was there, recently.

Kudos specifically gets me, though.

There's this push for people to kudos every fic they finish reading because "It's the least you can do" or "you owe the author if you read all the way through", along with some "kudos aren't good enough, you have to leave a comment"

and I think as @ao3commentoftheday said in the linked post, this is people devaluing kudos. A kudos is literally identical to a comment that reads "Kudos! ❤"

It's supposed to be a signifier that someone liked your work. It kinda waters down the meaning to consider it an obligation, and the overwhelming majority of people do not use kudos as a way to mark that they finished a work.

But if you're inundated with people making the argument that kudos should be used as a "made it through the fic" marker rather than a comment reading "kudos! ❤", kudoses lose their impact. If you imagine them as an obligation, they cease to be a compliment.

And if that's the slurry you're in, of course you feel unappreciated and invisible. That's a totally reasonable conclusion to come to, if you don't know that very few people devalue kudos that way. Of course it hurts if you think a kudos simply means "I read this"!

And I get why people want readers to understand how authors feel. I really, really do. There's always a nonzero number of people in fandom who simply haven't thought about how much it would mean to the author to get a comment, and hearing "authors love comments!!" can be really helpful!

But I do wish that we as authors would put a little more effort into reciprocating that understanding.

Because you do not and cannot know why someone isn't commenting, and "I know some people have crippling anxiety about commenting, but they can just come up with a script or send a heart emoji" doesn’t cut it.

You don't know why they're anxious. They could freeze up and have a panic attack at the idea of posting a comment at all. Some people have OCD and spend so long ruminating on making sure the comment is Right because Terrible Things Will Happen if it's Wrong that they're forced to give up. Maybe they have severe fatigue and/or chronic pain and they literally can't go through that extra step (hi, me).

Maybe they have PTSD from fandom harassment and they're afraid of bringing attention to themselves. Maybe they have PTSD for some other reason and it's blocked them from believing they could ever have anything to say that won't just piss the author off. Maybe they're ESL and they've been viciously mocked for their imperfect grammar. Maybe they have ADHD, and they seriously meant to, but then they lost track of it (hi again, me!).

Maybe they're simply still working up the nerve.

Guilting makes it worse. Much, much worse. All of it.

I legitimately stopped reading any fanfic for a few months because I felt so bad about how shitty I must be making authors feel, and it seemed better not to add to their disappointment if I couldn't summon up the energy or brain to comment.

How is that better?

And I have to say, in every single stat spiral I have seen (including mine!), the ratio is the problem, but what functionally happens is people discard kudos and hits as irrelevant.

"Only two hundred people kudosed out of x thousand hits! Everyone hates me!"

Another way to say that is two fucking hundred people liked it enough to leave you a comment reading "kudos! ❤"

and when presented as though this is a negative thing...without meaning to, you just swept two hundred people into the garbage and told them their positive feedback doesn't count.

Same thing with people who forget or are unable to kudos, actually— views are (mostly; see linked post) people who looked at your work. several people in the notes of the linked post up top go into why people who loved things may not kudos them, as well as breaking down why hits aren't an accurate measurement for reader engagement in the first place!

Most of your hits aren't people running away because they hate you. That's the sneaky hate spiral talking, and sneaky hate spirals lie to you. It's what they do. A majority of those hits are people who enjoyed it. We are throwing the baby out with the bathwater when we devalue hits, too, not just kudos.

To go by the OCD example from earlier, maybe they're working on a compulsive need to kudos everything they read. Or maybe they're just shy, or it's a really bad pain day and they only have enough spoons to read. Maybe they just forgot.

The people who liked it count. They matter, even if all you see of them is their presence in your hits.