#I've often tweaked my back

[forceuseralona]

my lower back is killing me AND I I must confess... THIS IS THE WORST PAIN I'VE EVER FELT EVEN WORSE THAN CHILDBIRTH WTF SOMEBODY SEDATE ME

[antisocialxconstruct]

outfit I bought myself for my birthday :v

[almadelsur]

💋 The Secrets One Keeps

summary: You're in love with jj but he's with kie, so in moments of pure desperation you often find yourself turning to the person he hates the most...rafe

warnings: some good old angsty pining, very very slight smut if you squint, fem!reader, one or two uses of y/n, plz let me know if I missed anything

a/n: SHE'S BACKKKK, so I've decided to completely reformat and re-post this fic with a few tweaks and editing considering i first wrote this like 3 years ago, and yes for those of you who have been asking, I fully intend to finallly continue this fic....more info on that later ;)

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・

JJ’s eyes change the moment Kiara steps into any room. Immediately his presence is ripped away from your immediate atmosphere, popping the little bubble you'd spent all afternoon crafting as he sprung up to greet the olive-skinned enigma that captured his affections.

“Kie!” The joy in his tone was incomparable to anything he’d directed at anybody else. Nothing could draw out such happiness from the blonde. You hated that about her.

In an attempt at self-defense, your brain shut itself off. Shielding you from processing the scene in front of you, your emotions ran cold like cement pouring down and across your neurons. It was the only way you could survive such a beating to your heart.

You figured that by distancing yourself mentally, you wouldn’t have to raise suspicion and distance yourself physically. In reality, you knew the real reasoning was your inability to stay away from JJ but the facade helped you cope.

“Hey J” she embraced him and his body relaxed around her as if she was the only source of his happiness. The only way he’d find alleviation from what he perceived as a shitty life being through her. “Sorry I’m late my parents had me running like crazy at the wreck today.”

Scattered greetings filled the air from the rest of the pogues, yet you could only focus on the way his eyes fixated on her like she was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

“Here come sit baby” he offered her the seat he had just previously been place holding. What you thought had been quality time with your best friend, presented itself to you now as momentary attention to pass the time until his actual desire arrived.

Settling herself down and offering you a wide smile, her shoulder bumped against yours gently as a sign of acknowledgment.

“Hey dude” she directed at you, but you didn’t reply. You just couldn’t bring yourself to pretend. Not today anyway. Instead, you offered her a small smile, it was minimal but it was the best you could do under the circumstances.

“Yo" A crumpled tissue paper flew at your head, jj attempting to refocus your attention on him, "didn’t you say you were gonna get some water or something?” He spoke up, the scheme evident in his tone.

“um yeah I guess” You lifted yourself up and took a few steps before jj used the opportunity to slump himself down where you had been sat and sprawled his arms across his girlfriend’s shoulders.

“snooze ya loose sucker” he joked as he turned to Kiara to start up some mindless conversation. Leaving you behind in the dust.

Your teeth gritted as you focused on making your way to the kitchen hoping the distance from the scene unfolding would lift the iron grip on your heart.

You made the fatal mistake of glancing back and you were met with the image of jj nuzzling up to kiara in a picturesque display of love. The lump building at the base of your throat indicated that it was your time to get the hell out of there before you broke down in front of everyone. 

“Shit guys, y’know what I just realized I gotta go” You spoke quickly, your tone matching your pace as you rushed to the exit of the chateau. 

“You’re still coming to the party later though right?” John B asked, not tearing his eyes away from the screen in front of him. 

“Mhm yeah sure” you opened the door ready to depart. 

“Shit I forgot about that! Me and jj are gonna be late, we got dinner at the wreck tonight.” kiara added as you stepped out, unable to control the escape of a rogue tear.

“Date night babyyyy” You heard JJ cheer before you slammed the door behind you. 

“Is Y/N okay? She seemed a bit off.” Kie nudged JJ as she questioned. 

JJ furrowed his eyebrows momentarily. Glancing out the window, he saw you jog away from the house, and a brief flash of worry flashed through his mind. As quick as it came, it dissipated. He shook his head figuring that if there had been something wrong, he’d have been the first to know. 

“Nah she’s okay don't worry.” he offered to kie.

Boy was he mistaken. 

——————————————————————

“Fuuuck me” you moaned out, sinking into him one last time. You were hot, sweaty, and heaving as you pulled him out of you.

“I thought I just did” Rafe taunted leaning back to lie down, arms crossed behind his head causing his taut abdomen to flex.

You scrambled off the bed, picking up your garments and shoving them back on your body forcefully.

“What, no pillow talk?” He tried again.

“Rafe..” you trailed off. Whenever you’d finish fucking, you’d struggle to even look at him. The self-hatred flooded your body as soon as the orgasm poured out.

“Hey you called me” he eyed you intently but you knew he didn’t actually care. To rafe cameron everything was just a game. At this point it was pretty much common knowledge. “In fact” he moved closer to you so that he could speak directly into your ear “It’s always you that calls me.”

“Don’t be a dick” you stood up and eyed your heels contemplating whether you could face the walk back in them. “You know it makes me feel like shit.” It might have sounded brutal but that’s how things were with rafe.

“Yeah, it’s like you punctuate your orgasms with self-hate.”

“I'm a pogue, rafe.” You argued back as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“So? Kooks and pogues can fuck you know.” You couldn’t comprehend why you were even having this conversation. Why now, why tonight.

“Yeah maybe, not you though.” You didn’t want to tell him the reason explicitly.

“I fuck pogues.”

“You fuck anyone.” The words came out almost instantly and without thinking, yet rafe took no offense.

“Exactly so what’s the issue?”

“The issue is, rafe.” You paused trying to find the words without actually having to say the words. “The issue is that if my friends found out they’d hate me, probably more than I already hate myself.”

He just chuckled, the look in his eyes changing as he figured you out.

“What's funny?” You challenged.

“You don’t have to bullshit me princess.” He looked up at you with a devilish glint in his eye. “You just don’t want jj knowing about your little escapades huh?” Bingo.

“He’s with Kiara.” You shrugged him off.

“Uh huh, you like him but you can’t have him.” Every word he spoke striking a nerve deep within you. “So you’re fucking me to fuck him over.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” You grabbed your heels and shoved them on, wincing as you buckled them up.

“Don’t I?” He threw his joggers on lazily as he stood, the level dynamics changing significantly. The older boy towered over you. “Where are they tonight?”

“Back at John B’s, we had a little get-together.” You crossed your arms. More often than not you usually called rafe after a few drinks left you feeling lonely. “Sorry, your invite must have gotten lost in the mail.” You attempted to jab at him with sarcasm yet he clearly held the upper hand with his line of questioning. 

“So all of them are there now?” He stepped towards you.

“Mhm,” You lied.

“Even jj?” Moving closer until your neck was craned upwards to meet his eyes.

Taking your silence as an answer, he reached up and ran his palms across your upper arms, prompting you to uncross them.

“He was uh- him and kie should be getting there soon” You mumbled.

“So would i be wrong in guessing, that might have prompted your call then?” You let yourself be guided by his movements leaning your neck further back as his hand trailed up to your jawbone.

“rafe…” you called out insignificantly.

He leaned in and pressed his lips against your neck, right over where he could feel your pulse, and pressed down.

You couldn’t help the gasp that left your mouth. Because as much as your heart belonged to jj, rafe was just so fucking good at raising your temperature.

“Round two?” He mumbled against your neck.

“Yeah..” you attempted yet it came out as a whisper. He grabbed you swiftly and lifted you, moving you across the room and throwing you down onto his bed, crawling on top of you in a predatory manner as he did so. As your back hit the bed, the ringing of your phone brought you back from the haze he had you under. 

“Wait rafe stop stop” you pushed him off and grabbed the screeching mobile, pressing it up to your ear. “Hello?”

“Dude, where are you?” The sound of jj’s voice came through over the pumping sound of music and party chatter. “Me and Kie just got back and John B says no one’s seen you for like over an hour.”

“Oh I’m uh, I had to go do something for my mom” The lie pouring out of your mouth caused rafe to chuckle which was of course met by a slap from you signaling for him to be quiet.

“Oh well, when are you getting back? I have to tell you about this date. You’re gonna be so proud of me I actually think I’m ready to tell Kie I love her” you screwed your eyes shut as he spoke.

“Yeah I- you know what I can’t make it back my mom needs me to stay and help out but uh I’ll see you tomorrow or something.” You hung up before he could even reply, throwing your phone down uncaring of its state.

“What’s wrong? They getting hitched?” Rafe spoke up from behind you.

You turned to Rafe, the fire in your veins pushing your arms to grab him, roughly pulling him back onto you.

“Just shut up and fuck me rafe.”

And fuck you he did.

——————————————————————

The next morning you woke up to the sight of rafe’s bare back. Not much of a cuddler, you figured.

Quietly you pushed the covers off and began to dress yourself back up. As you got to your shoes you sighed and shook your head, as if there was any way in hell you were going to walk home in heels. You scooped up your shoes and your now-cracked phone shaking your head, slightly ashamed at your outburst.

Without even a second glance at the sleeping body you were leaving behind, you made your way over to the door. As you turned the knob and stepped out to leave, a husky voice spoke up.

“I’ll keep my ringer on for you babe.”

You rolled your eyes looking back at him, “Fuck you rafe.”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m counting on.” He didn’t even open his eyes as he answered, instead just rustling around in the bed and turning to the other side, once again facing his back to you.

You scoffed as you exited. Your internal rant clouded your vision, body on autopilot with an excellent self-navigation of the Cameron house from the countless times you’d made this exit.

“Y/N?” The gentle voice wiped your thoughts clean as the shock stilled you dead in your tracks, slowly turning to come face to face with none other than Sarah.

“Sarah” you drawled out. “What are you doing here?”

“It’s my house?” Her head was cocked to the side, equally shocked to see you.

“No I just mean- I thought you were spending the night at John B’s.” You forced the small talk, avoiding the topic of why you were here, sneaking out at 8 in the morning.

“He had to work today, did you spend the night here?” She glanced up at the door of rafe’s bedroom.

“Umm-“ There had only been two other instances where you had been at a complete loss for words. The day jj told you he and Kiara were dating, the morning after your first sexual encounter with rafe, and now this.

“Are you sleeping with my brother?!” She whisper-shouted, eyes wide as the realization hit her. Busted.

“No?”

“Oh my god!” She grabbed you by the wrist and dragged you to her room, slamming the door as soon as you were both inside. “How long has this been going on?!” Her tone was loud and her hands wild as she interrogated you.

“Just a little under a year.” You sat on her bed and looked at your lap as you spoke. Reminiscent of a child being scolded.

“A year?! Oh my god!” She repeated. “Who knows about this?!”

With that, you looked up at her desperately. “No one. No one knows so please don’t tell them.” You didn’t have to name names for her to know who you were referring to.

“Are you two like” she paused “together?” She scrunched her nose up, disgusted at the thought of her bully of an older brother dating anyone.

“No god no. It’s just sex” you were just as uncomfortable as Sarah was, having to tell her about boning her older brother.

“Disgusting.” She turned away from you with her arms crossed, looking out the window.

“Look I’m not proud of it okay? Just-“ You sighed “Just please don’t tell anyone” pleading again.

Sarah let out a long sigh and uncrossed her arms. She walked over to you and joined you on the bed, her eyes showing concern mixed with something you couldn’t quite place your finger on.

“I thought you were into jj” she spoke softly, there it was. Pity.

“Yeah well, jj is with kie and instead of sitting around wallowing in self-pity, I decided to do something about it.” As the words left your mouth, you realized how weak the explanation was.

“So you just use rafe to bang the jj out of you.”

“It’s not like Rafe cares, if anything he’s also using me.” You tried to reason.

“I don’t doubt that. But I mean, that’s- It’s not healthy, you’ll never move on if you don’t actually process your emotio-“

“Look Sarah, I don’t need to do any of that shit okay? What I have here works, when I fu- when I’m with rafe, I don’t think about jj.” Tears began to swell in your eyes “Sleeping with rafe helps me forget about everything, even if it’s only for a little while he uh- he makes me feel good.” To an extent, there was truth behind your words, while you and rafe fucked the rest of the world went away. It was only after, that the crippling self-hatred hit you along with the return of your immense feelings for jj. 

Sarah shuffled over and threw her arm around you. “That’s not good for you, it’s just momentary. It’s easy and it's a cycle, you’re never going to get better going down this path. Especially not with rafe.”

“Rafe he’s- he’s not that bad.”

“Yes he is. But i bet it gives you satisfaction fucking him knowing jj hates him. Feels like revenge right?” She’d always been so perceptive your Sarah, you hated how she could see right through you.

Tears ran down your cheek silently. “You’re not gonna tell anyone right?” You sniffled.

She gave you one of those classic salt-of-the-earth Sarah Cameron smiles, the kinda smile that would light up any room she walked into. “Takin' it to the grave babe.”

A loud beeping caused both your heads to whip towards the window. “Shit, I completely forgot I was supposed to go on the HMS with pope and jj, we were gonna chill there until John B and Kie finished work.” She rose to her feet and extended an arm towards you. “Wanna come? Or we could drop you home if you’re not up for it.”

With a sigh you took her hand and pulled yourself up, walking beside her as you mentally prepped yourself to face the blonde you desperately pined for.

“Well rise and shine campers.” jj yelled out of the window of the drivers seat.

“Y/N! Where you been dude? you totally bailed last night.” Pope was next to speak as you and Sarah filed into the Twinkie. As JJ began to drive you avoided any form of eye contact in his general direction.

“I had to go help my mom out, blackout at mine again.” You didn’t even look at pope either, instead focusing your attention on the blur of trees and houses pacing by the window as JJ sped down the winding roads.

“Isn’t that what you were wearing last night?” pope, observant as always, pointed out.

“Uh yeah, I didn’t really get any time to change cause…”

“I called her last night when I got home, I was so drunk I don’t think I was ready to stop the party.” Sarah covered for you.

“Yeah I wrapped up helping my mom out and then this one calls me talkin bout a sleepover or something so I didn’t exactly have much time to change.” 

Thankfully pope had lost interest as soon as he had asked the question, otherwise, your overcompensating ass would have been caught out straight away. You always had to add to the lie until you felt like you had sold it completely.

Keeping your eyes trained on the outside meant that jj’s frown directed at you through the windscreen mirror went completely undetected. He always knew whenever there was something up with you and right there and then he knew something definitely was.

“Hey, you okay?” He didn’t need to address you explicitly for you to know he was talking to you.

“Yeah just tired.” You shrugged him off in an attempt to distance yourself from him yet again.

He knew you were lying but he didn’t understand why, you never lied to each other. Apart from John B, the pair of you were closer to each other than with anybody else in the group. You’d been best friends since kindergarten, and since then you’d sworn 3 things to each other.

1- You’d always share your snacks.

2-You’d always be best friends even if you argued.

 3- You would never ever lie or keep secrets from each other.

Of course, as the both of you grew older the rules became more and more lax. The snack sharing was limited only to when you felt nice enough and sometimes you’d go for days without making up if you had argued particularly badly. Having kept two friendship-breaking secrets from him, the childhood rules seemed pretty insignificant by now.

“Mhm,” he responded, flickering his eyes between you and the road. “Are we taking you home to change first?”

“Yeah, I don’t know if I’ll join you guys afterward though.” You chewed down on your nail anxiously as the tension from being in the same space as jj paired with the guilt from having fucked rafe prior, suffocated you.

JJ made a face as he focused on the road, something was wrong with you and he’d be dammed if he wasn’t going to put his everything into finding out what that was.

[gguk-n]

Jokes In The Cloud (Carlos Sainz x Comedian!Reader)

No Face Claim. All the pictures are from Pinterest.

CONGRATULATIONS TO CARLOS ON WINNING HIS SECOND GP THIS SEASON!!

punchlineprincess

Liked by y/bff/user and 2,389 others

punchlineprincess Vacationing with the people who get on my nerve the most

y/bff/user you forgot to take me😔😔 punchlineprincess y/bff/user sorry bbg, next trip with you alone😘😘 y/cousin/user you annoy us more🙂 y/mum/user not a nice thing to say Y/N punchlineprincess y/mum/user I was joking😅😅 user1 if someone saw her IG they would think she's a model😍😍 user2 God I've seen what you've done for others, when is it my turn🥲🥲 user3 pretty and funny. I want her!!❤️❤️

{Reader's POV}

The gears in my head my turning, I didn't know what I was supposed to do. I still had to refine my script; I was sure I could do it if I have a few hours. "Sweetheart, dinner's ready" my dad called out from the bedroom door. "Dad, I have to leave" I stated. "To where?" my dad asked, walking in. "You know that Netflix special I was gonna film" I began, he nodded along, "well, they want to film it on Monday" I finished. "That's in a day" he stated. "2, since it's in New York" I explained. "Cassidy will send me my tickets, but I think I'll be leaving now" I spoke. "Sorry about ditching the family trip. I know how important it was for you" I mumbled. "It's okay, darling. This is bigger. This will catapult you to fame like you always wanted, I mean I'm already so proud of you but this is still bigger" he explained trying to calm me. "Me and your mum will help you pack, come on" he said and called my mum.

The two of them helped me pack my bags. He explained how my Netflix special would be filmed soon and I would be leaving soon to everyone. All my younger cousins and nieces and nephews were so excited. Cassidy sent me the tickets. I made sure to pack everything while my mum fed me, it was chaos in the best way possible. "I'll be leaving now" I hugged my parents good bye. "Can't wait to watch it" my aunt spoke patting my back. "Mention us" one of my younger cousin's spoke. "I'll try" I laughed. My niece kissed my cheek wishing me good bye. My nephew wasn't ready to let me go yet, my brother had to pull him off me.

I waved good bye as the taxi left the resort, my family waving back as I disappeared. The ride to the airport was short, I was too busy going through my material to notice when I reached the airport. I paid the taxi driver and hauled my luggage to the check-in desk. The person behind it, checked me in and I was headed to immigration. This was the first time I noticed that I was sitting first class. When did my manager have this kind of money to book first class. I'd have to bring it up with her once I had the time.

I got done with all the formality and headed to the waiting area, where I spent my time going through my script and tweaking it ever so often. I downed a RedBull to try to align myself to New York time, so that I can combat the jet lag.

As the speaker's announced the boarding for my flight, I grabbed all my stuff with the plan to finish it up on the plane. The air-host lead me to my seat. I noticed a man sat on the seat next to mine, he looked an awful lot familiar, until it hit me that it was Carlos Sainz; my heart started pounding. I walked up to my seat, put my luggage away and sat down. My hands were shaking by the time I sat down, pulling my laptop out. I started typing away with shaky hands. "Is that a script?" a voice came from beside me. I turned around to find Carlos with his head turned, trying to figure out what's written. "Yeah, I'm a comedian, this is a script for my show" I tried to speak as confidently and calmly as possible. "That's cool. I'm Carlos, Carlos Sainz" he introduced himself. "I'm Y/N, Y/N Y/L/N" I shook his hand. "I'm a Formula One driver, maybe you'e heard about me" he further elaborated. I know, I've been obsessed with you for years, my poor brother has to listen to me talk about you for hours after every race, analysing the whole race. I have a fan account called carloslover, were the thoughts running through my head. "Yeah, I must've heard about Formula One some where" I said tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. "Well it's nice to meet you" Carlos said. "It's nice to meet you too" I said with a smile. "I'll let you get back to your work" Carlos said pointing at my laptop.

I spent a couple more minutes working on it before I was disturbed by Carlos, not like I was complaining; "I'm sorry but I'm kind of curious about what the script your working on is about" Carlos spoke slowly. "I'm filming a Netflix special in New York. So, I'm fine tuning my script" I chuckled. "Oh, sorry for disturbing you" Carlos replied sheepishly. Damn, he looked so cute, I caught myself fawning at him. "Ah, it's nothing." I quickly looked away, "I love when people are interested in what I do" I smiled. "Then, I will continue to annoy you a bit" he laughed. "Be my guest" I smiled back.

A few more tweaks and a good hour later, I was able to close the laptop, happy with the script I had at hand. "I'm guessing you're done" Carlos chimed in. "I am" I said stretching a little. "Maybe you could practice a bit with me" Carlos suggested. "I do want to practice my crowd work" I thought out loud.

"So, Carlos are you really a full time driver or a model? I can't really tell" I said. Carlos's face turned red, "Is this how you do crowd work?" he trailed. "I, no, can't let the opportunity to flirt with a man as handsome as you go" I smirked. Carlos's blush only deepened, "So, I'm special" he laughed. "Obviously" I shrugged. "If it's anything, I thought you were a model and not a comedian" he retorted. "I get that a lot. But doesn't work in my profession when people don't think pretty people tell good jokes" I retorted back. "I've never heard any of your jokes, but I'm sure you're funny since Netflix wants you" Carlos said. "Hope so" I said holding up my hands with crossed fingers.

I felt like the time flew by, as Carlos kept me company. Just as the flight was about to land; "Will I see you again?' Carlos asked hopefully. "You could, if I had your number" I remarked. Carlos pulled his phone out and handed it to me. I put my number in and called myself. "I'll see you soon." I winked as I saved Carlos's number. "Can't wait" Carlos replied, smiling at me as we grabbed our luggage to leave.

Cassidy was waiting for me as I exited the airport. "I'm so sorry, I should've checked my emails" she apologised grabbing my bag. "It's fine, let's go. I'm exhausted" I replied grabbing my bag back. We caught an uber back to the hotel. I rehearsed my script with Cassidy for the next few hours, trying not to memorise it so it would sound genuine.

punchlineprincess

Liked by y/bff/user and 2,378 others

punchlineprincess Done filming my first special, can't wait for it to air🥹🥹

y/bff/user I'M SO EXCITED🤭🤭 user4 I'll watch it just to see that outfit😍 user5 so pretty😍😍 y/mum/user so proud of my baby💖 y/dad/user my baby's all grown up😭❤️

punchlineprincess

Liked by y/bff/user, carlossainz55 and 3,289 others

punchlineprincess Joked my way into his life🫣🫣

y/bff/user ooohhhh who is this??👀👀 y/dad/user what is this behaviour y/n??? user6 OMG!!! I love this❤️❤️ user7 the best couple ever and idek the guy😅😅 user9 y/n being sporty wasn't in my bingo card🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ user10 the golf date!!!❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 user11 I want to go to an art museum with my lover and imitate art like that😏😏 user12 this is so Carlos coded plus he's in the likes😣😣

punchlineprincess

Liked by y/bff/user and 5,378 others

punchlineprincess I may have gone overboard for the premier at home🥲😅

y/bff/user I'M SCREAMING WHILE WATCHING IT🥹🥹 y/mum/user my baby❤️ carlossainz55 so proud of you ❤️Liked by Author user13 what does Carlos mean by that, like he knows her🙂👀 user14 the funniest shit i've watched in a while🤣🤣 user15 loved this so much!!!❤️🤣 user16 finally the real comedian that's getting the recognition she deserves😂😂

punchlineprincess

Liked by carlossainz55, y/bff/user and 1278,340 others Tagged carlossainz55

punchlineprincess Sorry I'm not normal about my boyfriend winning his second race this season😭😭

carlossainz55 I think having you there was my lucky charm🍀❤️ punchlineprincess carlossainz55 aww!! but it was your big brain and hard work❤️❤️🥹 y/bff/user aww!! watching both my babies win respectively 😭😭Liked by carlossainz55 and punchlineprincess y/dad/user good job Carlos👍 Liked by carlossainz55 user12 I should've known after those dates🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ user20 seeing her hug his mom when he won was so cute😭😭 user21 the most unlikely couple🥹🥹 user22 I get it Carlos, I get it😍😍 user23 Vamos Carlos!!👍👍 user24 I want a full timeline how everything went down😩 user25 I'm so happy I got to witness this race😭😭 user26 she was so sweet to all the fans and even took pictures with us!!😭🥹

After the race win celebrations on the podium and the team, after the interviews when I finally got him all to myself; "I'm so proud of you baby" I whispered as I pressed a kiss on his lips. "I'm so happy you got to see me win" Carlos mumbled not letting go. "I can't believe instead of watching you on TV I got to watch you in real life" I said pulling away. "I don't know why you lied to me when we met" Carlos laughed. "Well I couldn't tell you I'm @ carloslover on Instagram and Twitter and I've been in love with you since you debuted" I laughed. "I think I wouldn't have paid much attention since you're so pretty" Carlos smiled running his hands down my sides to rest on my waist. "Well I'm a Carlos lover and I am Carlos's lover. It's a win win" I smiled, "You and I both, princessa, you and I both" Carlos captured my lips in another, yet steamy kiss pulling me closer so my body was touching his, "You are all sticky and smell of champagne", I mumbled against his lips trying to pull away but Carlos pulled me closer, "No" he muttered and continued kissing me. He walked back to sit on the couch pulling me down with him, straddling his lap. He pulled me closer, our bodies touching, his hands roaming mine before they found home on my ass. We pulled away slightly breathless but Carlos than started his assault on my neck, sucking on my sweet spot near my collar bone while pushing me down on his lap. I could feel him grow under me. I pushed him away, "Nope" I said firmly. "No?" he asked cocking his head to the right with his big brown puppy eyes, "We're not doing it here. Let's get back to the hotel, maybe after you smell a little less like alcohol, I'll think about it" I said getting up. "Y/N" he whined holding my hands as I stood in front of him. "Not even for today's race winner" he pouted. "No. Baby, this is your work place. I will do anything and everything you want but out of the paddock" I said. "The car?" Carlos perked up. "Carlos, darling, we'll be on the headline tomorrow reading Carlos Sainz Jr knows how to celebrate his win in Mexico with girlfriend in his black Ferrari" I said. "Fine, Let's go back soon. I can't wait" he humphed before going to change out of his race suit. "I love you" I called out. "También te amo" he called back.

[joaniscruzing]

reuniting with jinx <3

everyone... that was quite the rollercoaster. but, i choose to believe that jinx is alive. i'm not ready to let go of arcane for a good while, and I'll do my best to upload fics more often, especially with the holiday breaks coming up too, so reel in whatever arcane requests you have! i write for vi, caitlyn, and jinx. i do take smut requests for these characters too if you guys would like to request some...

obviously though, jinx wouldn't leave without finding her amazing gf though... right??

summary: jinx surprises you while you're grieving, and you both escape and go elsewhere.

warnings: angst at the beginning, season 2 act 3 spoilers, kissing, emotional, lots and lots of fluff, I PROMISED A HAPPY ENDING AND DELIVERED

you couldn't believe it. your whole body crumbled to the ground as vi told you the devastating news.

"I'll tell you one thing," vi tried to quip, a small smile on her face, "she went out with a bang."

vi explained that she heard an explosion sound when jinx fell down the vent, and how she guessed she had set off one more bomb. you take vi close to you, hugging her tightly.

"she really did love you, you know." vi admitted, "i think she's just had a lot come her way. and i can't say I'm the most innocent in that realm myself."

you left vi to continue staring at the fireplace, about to leave and go to jinx's workshop, hoping to take a few things to remember her by. you see caitlyn looking at the vent diagram, studying it closely. how could she possibly studying the place where your beloved girlfriend died? you knew that caitlyn had grown to not hate jinx anymore, so you decided to just leave it at that.

after leaving the kiramann mansion, you traversed back to zaun, thoughts racing through your head. had you not done enough? loved her enough? given her a reason to live? you wanted to scream as loudly as you could, and let whatever you were feeling out.

you finally made it to where jinx had her things, and you took a deep breath before entering. this was it.

the once lit-up place was darker and worn-out in her eyes. the once neon, bright-colored place seemed to be dark and empty now. like you without jinx. a tear rolled down your face as you picked up small tools and things, even parts of a flower she was making for you out of scraps. you sat on the floor, looking up at the ceiling, trying to make sense in your head of what you should do next.

"did you really think i was gone, hun?" jinx questions, right behind you. your entire body leaps at the sound of her voice. it can't be.

"jinx?" you ask, shooting your head up and turning around.

"did you really think i was gonna die that easily? now stop moping. we have to get on the hot air balloon."

shocked, you hug jinx quickly before shoving one thing you collected in your pocket. you both start running. hand in hand, you make a beeline in order to get on the next hot air balloon.

"you know what i realized? things aren't so great here, so why don't i just go somewhere else to do my thing? but, i knew i couldn't leave without you." jinx explains while running.

"how did you even get out?" is the only thing you manage to say.

"my shimmer, silly! i got the hell out and escaped through the air vents."

"and how did you get back to zaun?"

"simple hacking and tweaking of the hexgates. nothing special."

you both finally make it onto the airship, jinx holding your hand as you get on so you don't fall. she closes the door behind you.

"so. this is it. any last wishes before we leave forever?"

"my biggest one has been granted," you answer before pulling in jinx for a sweet kiss. you had missed her, as you hadn't seen her for a week or two with everything going on. jinx pulls away, explaining that you two had to go.

"you know, i've always wanted to drive one of these," jinx admits, steering the ship, "i have since i was very young." you notice a new sense of peace in her eyes as she drives the ship. she doesn't seem so... tortured anymore. in fact, she seems free of any past issues.

her newly cut hair blows in the wind, as you go up behind her and hug her waist, your head resting on her shoulder. no matter what the future held, you knew you were going to be happy. as long as jinx was there, you would be at peace.

"i love you," jinx says softly, taking one hand off the wheel to rest on top of yours.

"i love you too."

[evie-sturns]

𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐞 - 𝐂𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬 𝐒𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐨

summary: you and chris have a major argument, which results in you storming out of you and chris's house. he regrets everything, but it results in him saying 'i love you' for the first time.

warnings: angst, swearing, argument, crying, fluff, happy ending!

-----------------*＊✿❀○❀✿＊*--------------------

me and chris have been dating for two months, we've never fought, i mean we've bickered, but never a real argument. we've done alot together, we have a house together, 2 cats, we've hooked up tens of times, but never said those 3 words.

'i love you'.

i think both of us are just terrified of scaring the other person away.

-

"chris! i'm home!" i say, walking through the front door as i put my purse down.

no response.

chris is sitting on the couch, my phone on his lap.

"why do you have my phone baby?" I say, jumping down next to him.

"i think we both know." his voice is filled with emotion, he clenched the pepsi can in his right hand tighter.

i reach out a hand, placing it gently on his thigh, he grabs my wrist and throws my hand towards me, my shoulder is tweaked slightly.

"don't fucking touch me!" he says, looking at me in disgust, raising his voice as he stands up.

my eyebrows furrow from pure confusion as i follow him, standing up and facing him.

"tell me whats happening christopher." i say sternly, my shoulder pulses from the sudden jolt.

chris knows when i use his full name i mean it, i don't just throw it around because of how formal it is.

chris glares down at me before slamming the pepsi can to the floor.

"all these fucking months, all these hookups, all these deep talks, everything meant nothing to you?!" he yells, my heart sinks, ive never liked people yelling at me.

i've always had an attitude, chris knows how to deal with it.

"look, if you dont open your fucking mouth instead of flaming me for something i don't even know, i'm out of here yeah?" i snap back, folding my arms.

"you're so pathetic." he mutters, pushing my shoulder back.

"stop touching me chris!" i scream. squeezing my eyes shut and clenching my fists like a toddler.

he scoffs.

a silence grows before i flop down on the couch, clutching my shoulder. i pat the spot next to me, signalling for him to sit down, hoping we can talk it out.

he takes a step back before yelling, "go call mark, cause he clearly loves you so much!" his voice cracking.

my eyes widen.

"so fuck you!" he yells, i stand up.

his cheeks are flushed his eyes are glossy, chris's bottom lip is quivering.

my gaze softens, but instantly flicks back to a harsh one as chris starts again.

"im done with you're shit y/n, go home! for once in your life just leave. me. alone." he says, his tone cold.

i've never cried in front of chris, i don't cry often and if i do, im always alone. but the way he was looking at me broke something in me.

several tears fall down my cheek as i look up at chris. the tears increase as i just stare at him, his mouth gapes slightly. his eyebrows tilt up above his nose.

i push past him, grabbing my purse and running out the door, chris is speed-walking after me, before i slam the door shut, i yell out.

"by the way chris. mark is my fucking dad." my voice shakes as the tears don't slow.

an audible gasp escapes from chris's lips right before the door shuts.

-

two days ago i stormed through the door to my best friends house, sobbing as she comforted me.

i haven’t texted chris in those two days, but he’s been spamming my phone nonstop.

I sigh, sitting my head up off my best friend, amelia’s chest. “you okay?” she asks, pausing the movie which is playing on her macbook.

“did you not hear?” i ask, adjusting my sweater

“hear what..?” she asks, her eyebrowints furrowing in confusion

“you’re doorbell just rang, i’ll go get it okay?” i say, giving amelia a warm smile as i run downstairs.

i open the door, my heart sinks.

“chris?” i say, taking a nervous step back

his hand is clutched onto a stuffed animal, and a hand picked flower, which is dropping to the side slightly now. chris’s eyes are swollen, his nose red.

“i- uh.. um.” he stammers looking around

i stay silent, waiting for him to start,

he holds a hand out “can we go sit in my car i uh..” he says, his voice cracking

chris has always said his car is his comfort place, the area he feels safest, so i don’t shut him down yet.

i take his hand “amelia! i’ll be back in a few minutes” i yell as i close the front door behind me.

the walk down the driveway is silent, i can feel chris’s hand growing more sweaty by the second. he opens the door for me, the passenger seat has a blanket on it, with a packet of painkillers resting in the middle.

“what’s the pills for?” i ask, looking over my shoulder at chris.

“your shoulder..” he says, a guilty expression plastered across his face.

i nod understandably, sitting down in the car seat.

chris walks over to the driver side, climbing inside.

he lets out an audible swallow before opening his mouth to speak, nothing comes out.

“shit.. sorry ‘m really nervous..” chris says, holding onto a pepsi can.

“i’m so sorry, for even assuming the worst. i feel like an absolute goof for thinking your dad was another person..” he pauses for a second, quickly rubbing his under eyes

“and i was just hurt, i don’t even know why i thought mark was someone else, i should’ve never touched you i feel like shit about that too, and i’ve never seen you cry, so seeing what i had done to effect you just shattered my heart, i just don’t want to loose you and i.. i” he takes in a deep breath

“i love you.”

the rest of his words don’t get through to me, my heart is fluttering, i look over at him, chris’s cheeks are flushed red as his mouth moves quicker than his brain, i lean over the centre console, shutting him up with a kiss.

after a few seconds i pull away, “i love you too christopher.”

-

i run back inside, thanking amelia and telling her everything chris said, amelia is practically crying tears of joy as she hugs me, “go go! go back to his house i love you y/n!” she says, a smile spread ear to ear on her face.

i run back outside to chris, climbing inside his car.

the rest of the conversations go like this.

“are you sure your shoulders okay?”

“chris you barely touched me.”

“no but i made you cry y/n.”

“yeah, not because of the shoulder sweetheart.”

“well i told matt and nick what happened and then ordered a private doctor to come assess you..”

“chris.”

——————————————————————————

ayeee hope y’all like!!

[xamag-draws]

BBR thoughts 2024

Since I mentioned that I finally dusted off an old project of mine and was ruminating on how I'd remake it, I thought I'd elaborate a little, now that I've solidified some concepts. For funsies

This is gonna be a bit of a long and unfocused one, but I don't share my personal thoughts here often, especially the stuff about my projects I always marinate in. And for once it's something that people have existing context for, so hey why not

So for anyone who hasn't been following me for a gajillion years, The Black Brick Road of OZ was a webcomic that I posted around 2013-2015, back when I was in highschool going on college (which is kinda crazy to think about). It was sort of a darker twist on The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, although I definitely leaned a lot more into dark humor more than anything in those first few chapters

I don't think it's available to read anywhere anymore, and I know people have been asking me about it. So here's the full proper archive of BBR, as full as it can be with deceased Flash

I totally used it as an excuse to shamelessly and self-indulgently experiment. It had interactive pages and GIFs and was wayyy too overproduced for what I could handle or what was necessary, but I did have great fun making it while it lasted

Unfortunately, that excess and the fact that I've changed too much as a person by the time I was in college is what ultimately killed it. The direction I wanted to go in was practically unrecognizable from the original idea started back in 2011, so there were many old hold-ups that I felt ruined it

At the time I kinda wished I could start/rewrite it all over, but considering that I pretty much had the entire script done at that point, it felt like a pointless sisyphean task. So I just put it on a shelf and didn't look back for about 8 years, because I didn't know what else to do

Now to be fair, the nature of my art has always been iterative and cyclical; when I feel like my creative juices have run dry I prefer to leave a project to marinate and move on to something else; cycle through other old things and bring in new skills and perspectives into the mix when I'm ready again. Not very productive, but it is what makes me happy to work on my OCs; I'm doomed to hit a wall with them eventually and I need some time to be able to find a new direction

So that said, I'm glad that BBR was left to marinate for that long. I don't think I was prepared, emotionally or intellectually, to tackle it again until now. The Wizard of Oz book (and the entire series of them, really) has always been near and dear to my heart, but there's a lot of context around it that I'm only unpacking now that I'm older

I think I always inherently feel negatively about the stuff I've made in the past, like its faults always jump out to me more than the positives, especially the more time passes. I've never liked that, and I do really appreciate the kind things people have to say about BBR to this day. The fact that it still can be recognized and remembered is very sweet

When I left it, I already found it "kinda cringe", and that feeling only deepened with years. When I took my first look back at it, asking the question "how would I rewrite it now?", at first I took a very cynical approach, as in "everything would have to be torn down"

But the more I sat on it, the more I found that I still see some merit and charm in the ideas I was putting out; I just didn't know how to execute them at the time (not to pretend that I know what I'm doing now, but I certainly know more at least). Turns out a lot of my old concepts could be changed substantially with just a few small tweaks. So I'd say that's a nicer way to think about my previous work

If you haven't seen yet, I posted a first draft of my new designs for some of the characters (the main group, the Goods and the Wickeds). Definitely subject to change, but more or less how I see them now

I'm just playing with these concepts; by no means would I attempt to remake BBR right this moment. Call it a pipe dream among my other ones. But just for fun, this is the direction I'd like to take:

Nowadays I'd probably make it a visual novel, with more emphasis on the visual part than the novel because I'm no English prose writer by any means. It'd still let me play a little with the interactivity while helping cut some corners on the drawing part (only some, I imagine I'd go hog wild anyway)

I've always intended for some events inspired by the sequel books to take place in BBR's past. Stuff like Jinjur's revolt or Ozma's rule preceeds the main events here. So I think it would be fun to follow the past of a few key characters alongside the main story. One chapter focusing on the present quest to see the Wizard, then one focusing on the past events (that are maybe reflective thematically); rinse and repeat

I'm also sticking a little closer to the original text in some regards. Not everything that I enjoy from the books would be translated here, it's still just a very loose fantasy on the material; but I'd like to be closer in spirit at least

I like mature, wise and powerful Glinda, I like kind and vulnerable Tin Man, I like the Wizard being a pathetic yet loveable liar, so I'm sprinkling in more of that for example

I'd like to keep some whimsy, but make it more grounded and a bit more serious to be coherent in tone. I think the original TWWOOZ book was a more realistic fantasy in some ways, even for the standards of the time; I like its simple but vivid tactile descriptions and details like bringing attention that Dorothy needed to eat and sleep

I find it funny that Baum specifically was averse to making his books scary or unpleasant, finding that unnecessary for telling a compelling kids story, but they still can get pretty dark and disturbing, at least for our modern sensibilities. Let's just say that I intend to use the Evoldo and Chopfyt storylines for my purposes. In that way, I feel like a "darker" Wizard of Oz retelling can still mostly be tonally in line with the original and balance it with enough heart and occasional humor

I slowly grew to appreciate the quaint old-timey quality of the original series, as well. The first book is both timeless and very much a product of the 1900s. Originally I tried to give it a little modern or at least anachronistic spin, but it was moreso because it's what I knew best, so these days I'd rather intentionally lean into the time period. Still not fully historically accurate by any means, but at least directly acknowledging the influence

The events of the story span across 40 years of these characters' lives, so I'm drawing inspiration from the entire so-called La Belle Epoque: the time period around 1880s-1920s. Basically I'm cooking, and my soup is old Victorian fashion morphing into Edwardian fashion and slowly inching towards flappers

Some new Dolly outfits

Lots of crazy things, political changes and innovations were happening at the turn of the century, which I think is noted and reflected by Baum in the books as well; the character of Tik-Tok might not blow any minds now, but he was one of the first robot characters in literature at that point; and don't even get me started on Jinjur, etc. Plenty of really interesting stuff one could lightly ponder in an Oz adaptation these days

Aesthetically, art nouveau has always been a big artistic influence for me, and it'd definitely be its time to shine here. John R. Neill's illustrations of the Oz books often keep me company as well. Nouveau architecture in particular fits that fairytale whimsy extremely well imo

I'd allow myself a little bit of art deco here and there, but ultimately its intimidating geometrical splendor is an antithetical to the flowery nature of nouveau and I associate it with a completely different era. Definitely fitting some characters like my Wicked Witch of the West, but shouldn't be overused

One of my main problems with the original BBR was that eventually I lost track of what it was even about; and the original ending felt too mean and unfulfilling to be worth it. Now I'd like to stick to the theme of home and family as my main theme, but in a different, more bittersweet way than in the book

An interesting connection I made is that a lot of my aforementioned older key characters (the Witches, Jinjur, the Nome King, etc) all came from the same reformatory as kids, that's how they know each other. In my recent research I learned that in those reformatories it was usually frowned upon to release the children back to the families, which were seen as the original corrupting influence regardless of the circumstance. The reformatory did everything in its power to cut that connection and make itself the only family those wayward kids were supposed to know and love. That's an unexpected tie into the theme of home that I'd like to explore as well

So yeah that's the current state of it. I have a bunch of outfit concepts I'm slowly cooking, although I'm now sure whether I'd post them... But I do miss these funny guys, and I'm glad some people still do as well :)

[nhlclover]

𝖥𝖠𝖪𝖨𝖭𝖦 𝖨𝖳 𝖲𝖤𝖳𝖧 𝖩𝖠𝖱𝖵𝖨𝖲

summary seth always visits the training room in hopes of getting your attention until one day it backfires. warnings flirting + teasing, simply fluff! word count 1.26k notes first seth piece!! i literally love this man so much so i hope y'all enjoy. i've also had this plot for ages and i finally decided to write it.

Seth entered the team’s training room for what felt like the hundredth time since the start of the season, and his eyes immediately searched for you. He carried the same easygoing grin that he always did, the one that made it seem like nothing could bother him. It was one that was starting to become all too familiar to the other Hurricanes players and staff — a grin that usually meant Seth was up to something.

He spotted you by the cabinets, organizing boxes of splints and unrolling new lengths of tape with a focused intensity that made him pause. He couldn't help but admire how dedicated you were, how you seemed to move effortlessly despite the chaos that usually surrounded you. The first time he saw you, he thought it was just a fleeting attraction—something he’d forget about by the next practice. But as the days passed, he kept noticing more about you: the way you bit your lip when you were deep in concentration, the soft hum of a tune you’d sing under your breath when you thought no one was listening, and the bright way you laughed, like you weren’t weighed down by anything.

The training room started to feel a little brighter when you were there, and he found himself coming up with excuses to swing by more often. A slight tweak of his ankle, a vague soreness in his leg—any reason to have you check him out, even if he didn’t need it.

Over time, his visits became less about any actual injuries and more about getting to see you and getting to talk to you. He tried to be subtle, but his teammates noticed, throwing teasing comments his way when you weren’t looking. They’d tease him, elbowing him in the ribs, telling him to “stop pretending to be hurt just because he liked the company.” Seth would laugh it off, but he knew they were right. Every time he walked through those doors, it was just another chance to see you.

“Hey, y/n,” Seth greeted, a playful tone dancing in his voice. “Got a minute? I think something's up with my shoulder today.”

You turned, eyes meeting his with an amused glimmer that always seemed to make his pulse quicken. “Your shoulder this time, huh?” you asked, crossing your arms over your chest. “You know, Seth, you might just set a record for the most visits to the training room,” you said.

“What can I say?” he shrugged, still grinning. “I’m a delicate guy.”

“Uh-huh, sure,” you replied, but the corner of your mouth twitched like you were fighting back a smile. You pointed to the table. “Sit. Let’s take a look at this ‘injury’ of yours.”

Seth hopped up on the table, swinging his legs like a kid. “I don’t know,” he said, voice dripping with dramatic flair. “It’s feeling pretty tight today. Might be serious.”

You rolled your eyes, stepping over to him. “Shirt off.”

He didn’t hesitate, stripping off his shirt in one smooth motion, revealing the lean, athletic muscles that came from years of hard work on the ice. You tried to keep your expression neutral, tried not to react to the way his skin gleamed under the fluorescent lights. But Seth saw the flicker of your eyes, the quick dart to his chest before you composed yourself. It sent a thrill through him—he liked that he could get a reaction out of you, even if you tried to hide it.

You stepped closer, fingers already tingling with the familiar sensation of checking injuries, but this time, you felt something different. Maybe it was the way he was watching you, eyes locked on your face like you were the most interesting thing in the room. Or maybe it was the way his skin felt warm beneath your touch, the slow rise and fall of his breathing under your fingertips.

“Any pain here?” you asked, pressing lightly on his shoulder.

“Maybe a little,” he said, though the slight smile tugging at his lips betrayed him. “I think you should keep checking, just to be sure.”

You sighed, a little exasperated, but you kept your focus. There was clearly nothing wrong with his shoulder, the lack of wincing or tension in his movements betraying his lie.

“Well,” you said, pulling your hands away from his shoulder, leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake. “I think you’ll live. But just to be sure, maybe I should recommend you take a game off. Can’t be too careful, right?”

Seth’s eyes widened, panic flashing across his face. “Whoa, whoa, hold on—no need to get drastic here!”

“Why not? You keep showing up here all the time. It seems like you need the rest.”

He swallowed, trying to keep his cool, but you were so close now, and it was making his heart race in a way that had nothing to do with nerves. “Because,” he said, a bit too quickly, “I’m not actually hurt.”

You blinked, tilting your head. “You’re not?”

He let out a long, exasperated sigh, pulling his compression shirt back over his head. “No. I just… I just wanted an excuse to see you, okay? The shoulder’s fine. I’ve always been fine.” He rubbed the back of his neck, his cheeks burning with embarrassment. “I know it’s stupid, but I didn’t know how else to get your attention.”

You bit back a smile, trying to keep your composure. “You mean to tell me, all these times you’ve come to see me claiming your knee hurt, or you twinged your back… all those times you were faking it just to talk to me?”

Seth groaned, dropping his head into his hands. “Yeah, yeah, I know. It’s pathetic. But you make it really hard to think straight, okay? And I’m not great with this stuff. I figured if I came in here enough, maybe you’d notice me.”

“I did notice you,” you said, and there was something softer in your tone now. “I noticed you every time you limped in here, pretending to be all tough. And believe me, I knew you were faking it.”

Seth’s head shot up, his eyes wide with disbelief. “You did?”

You nodded, biting back a smile. “Yep. Since, like, the second time you came in saying your elbow felt ‘off.’ You’re not exactly subtle, you know.”

“Well, that’s… that’s just great,” Seth muttered, feeling heat flood his face. “So I’ve been making a complete idiot of myself this whole time?”

“A little bit, yeah,” you admitted, stepping closer, “but it was kind of cute.” You reached out, gently tapping his shoulder. “You know, you could’ve just asked me out, Seth. It would’ve saved you a lot of time and fake injuries.”

“So… does that mean you might be interested?”

You rolled your eyes playfully. “Yes, Seth. It means I’m interested. Now, are you finally going to ask me out, or do you need to pretend to break a leg first?”

Seth’s grin spread across his face, genuine and full of relief. “Alright, alright. Would you… maybe want to go out with me sometime? For real, this time?”

You smiled back, nodding. “I’d like that.”

His heart soared, and he couldn't help the goofy grin that spread across his face. “Really?”

“Really,” you confirmed, stepping back and giving him a gentle pat on the shoulder. “Now, go stretch that ‘injured’ shoulder of yours before I change my mind.”

He laughed, shaking his head in disbelief. “You’ve got it.” And as he left the training room, Seth couldn’t help but feel like he was walking on air.

[aakaneeee]

ROUND 7 THEORY.

Till is going to lose: and Hyuna won't be there to save him.

this is insanely long, hug yourselves

I. Hyuna won't be part of the rescue mission.

I'm going to start with the obvious: today's alien stage friday content that opened my third eye.

obviously, hyuna is.. suffering is an understatement right now, she appears in a lot of pain, having to lean on mizi to walk. not only this, but mizi is distressed too. she is looking back, and the warning:intruder sign is reflecting in her eyes. interesting detail I've seen: the screen behind hyuna I'd light, and I personally think it's Luka's promotional photoshoot we've seen in All-In. maybe a slight reach, and not a good point to base a whole theory I genuinely believe in on, but trust me, it all ties togheter: Hyuna is looking directly forward, towards a 'light', while Mizi is looking back, at a warning sign. So, Hyuna will go to their base, and Mizi will do the rescuing mission alone. This might sound stupid, but the AMOUNT of content I found that holds this theory is insane.

Speaking about All-In..

This is a promotional video for All-In. (Might be the teaser but I'm tweaking) Mizi is only shown in the car scene, where she's togheter with Hyuna. In the other parts, Hyuna is completely alone. This might not mean a lot, except that we have this official art:

Unlike the frame in the video, Hyuna is alone here, leaving dust on the on the other cars. Does this mean that she'll go alone? Perhaps leave alone? And there's even more I consider as 'evidence'.

In the cover of hyuna ver. of ROMH, she seems to be laying down, something that I don't think she would be able to do while still being in the ALNST building, and the splash on her face seems to be similar to the character's that have died.

As happy as this looks, again, Mizi isn't here. The rest of the rebellion is, and she's wearing the outfit she had on in All-In when making that video with the others. She's making a gun sign, something usual for her, she's done it multiple times all over. Is this foreshadowing of her being shot?

But this.. even though the backround is Hyuna, it's obvious that the hands are not hers because of the light skin. So is this Mizi that's trying to learn from Hyuna? Maybe because she has to do a mission without her? Back to the All-In teaser, we don't see who's holding the gun that flashes between the frames of Hyuna's hand making a gun sign. I personally think it's Mizi instead, since now she's learned how to fire. Afterall, in All-In, even Hyuna is surprised at her sudden fierceness.

Here, it seems like Hyuna is being announced something, while sitting down. But what could be so important that she is told with such secrecy? The only thing I can imagine is a rescue mission, but she isn't there herself.

In this art, Mizi is looking down, while Hyuna is looking up, with a stern face, almost monitoring. But where could Mizi be, so high up she has to look down, and so bright she has to shadow her eyes? This takes me to the next part of my theory:

II. Till is going to lose.

The light from above the stage in the Round 7 teaser is dark blue, but a specific shade that has been often associated with Mizi. Is she there, so that's why she's looking down? Also from the teaser, we have this (which I think was pointed out before):

The little gun aim light is pointed towards the stage from an alien that seems to have a guard helmet, and then a light covers Till. I think it's enough proof that something will happen to him, but I have more. So much more.. And yet, I think the other ones fit more into another category. III. Even though he'll lose, Till won't die. But he won't live well, either. I am not delusional, I genuinely think Mizi's rescue mission will go well.

Here, Till is holding a strand of Mizi's long hair, the hair we know is long gone. In relationship with the first category, Hyuna is the only one missing from this art.

I initially thought it was Till protecting Mizi from something, but no. I think it's Till protecting the image of Mizi he remembers from something he finds terrifying: and I think that scary thing is the real Mizi, the Mizi that exists now. It's a common theme that Till is only inlove with the image of Mizi, so what if that dissapears? I imagine he'd be terrified of that.

Here, the wire of Till's collar (that we've seen him wearing in round 7, too) seems to be blending with Mizi's hair, as if he is bound to the image of past her. (Since we know her hair is short now.)

In this, the tape is similar to the one that covered his mouth in Top 3, but here, his mouth is wide opened, the tape instead covering his name, as if his freedom, his own voice was given back to him, rather covering his branding whom is proof of ownership.

Here, the characters that are behind have died, and the ones that are holding flowers are the ones who love Mizi. But again, it's the long haired old Mizi.

III. Hallucinations

Alien Stage is about romance, and hallucinating your loved one isn't new in it. Mizi hallucinated Sua in Round 5, and Till hallucinated Mizi (again, her old version) after... we all know what I mean. Hallucinating has led to losing, but is this going to be the case in Round 7?

Well, yes and no. Yes for Till, no for Luka, and I think this aspect is the one that makes the most difference between them.

Let's talk about Till first. I feel like Luka won't genuinely see Till as a threat, especially after Round 6. I do not think that he will do the ROMH technique. And yet, I think Till will hallucinate Ivan in him anyways. Looking at Luka's stage smile and Ivan's default expression, they look very similar (atleast to me), and the white outfits might do it, too.

This particular image makes me feel like that. His fingers aren't purple, which, I don't know what to make out of it, but it's about the neck holding. Ivan always seemed to have something with Till's neck, and there's a lot of art to prove it. This is undoubtedly something that Ivan would do, and I can imagine Till hallucinating Ivan, or atleast, a warped version of him, in situations like this. Till is already in a bad place mentally, so I feel like such a thing would destroy him, even though he won't go down without a fight.

Onto Luka. I think hallucinating Hyuna in Till is inevitable: their energy is just incredibly similar. But unlike Till, Hyuna is Luka's motivation to sing.

In this comic, we find out that Luka doesn't truly like singing: his only reason for singing is (or atleast, was) the fact that Hyuna likes it. And again, unlike Till, Luka is obsessed with the stage. It's canon that he has low self-esteem, and that winning is his way of raising it up. I don't see him having a mentality like Till, but rather, one that sounds more like "Only I get to kill you.", so a competition against Hyuna would only make him more motivated. And so, I think that hallucinating Hyuna gets him even closer to a win.

IV. Till will escape: but at what cost?

Till knows that the last time he turned down escaping, it didn't go well. So, even now, with the new image of Mizi, even now, with Ivan dead, even now, when he's still holding onto an image long gone of someone he loves, he will accept, but without getting implicated into whatever the resistance does too much. Why? Because he thinks he has nothing left except his hallucinations.

V. Conclusion

I'm sorry for how long this is!! I've been thinking for sooo long... I really like how I've made this though, in the end. extra: In this official art, the characters that are slightly smiling are now dead (sua, ivan).. it doesn't really mean anything to what I said (I think), but I found it interesting :)

[yanderes-galore]

Heyy, can I could request a romantic yandere Hazbin Hotel Alastor x darling who is a demon who wants to redeem herself but has a deal with alastor so, she has her soul but being in the hotel cannot do her any harm or yeah? ����

Sure! Made some tweaks to fit this into canon, Alastor's intention are still unknown towards you. Defaulted to concept as I wasn't sure how you wanted this. Originally didn't read that darling HAD her soul, so this got a bit difficult but I think I've got it.

Yandere! Alastor with Sinner! Darling

Pairing: Romantic/Platonic (Dubious)

Possible Trigger Warnings: Female Darling, Obsession, Manipulation, Ownership, Possessive behavior, Violence, Mentions of being a pet, Forced/Toxic partnership.

The only demons who can redeem themselves are known as Sinners.

Power is an important thing in Hell, that's primarily what deals are about here.

Power is what makes the hierarchy and makes other demons, like Overlords, powerful.

Alastor is one of these many Overlords.

He's actually... one of the most feared Overlords.

Based on what we can see in the show, demons would do anything to not go near him.

Alastor has made many deals with demons before.

Which is probably why he's so powerful.

You just so happen to be yet another Sinner he has under his belt.

Be it through gambling or some other desperate reason... you managed to come face to face with Alastor.

"Poor girl... all alone with no one to help you, hm~?"

The Overlord is pleased when he sees you, a desperate soul who needs his help.

Before he helps to pick you up, he offers you a deal.

A deal he's made countless times before.

He'll help you as long as you are indebted in some way to him.

Perhaps he doesn't have your soul, like you said.

Making any sort of deal with an Overlord is bad news.

In this case, instead of your soul, Alastor can settle for something else.

Perhaps he'll find a way to swindle it from you later....

At the time, well, you took it.

When he offered you that deal, you had no other option.

Such a deal made you a pet for the radio demon, one he can call whenever he wishes.

That's the deal... you'll be tied to him one way or another even if he doesn't have your soul.

Unless you want him to cast you out to the Hellhounds and Sharks again, hm~?

Y'know what's worse?

You happen to be his favorite.

"Hey there, darling dear~ We'll be great partners, you'll see!"

That was a long time ago, now.

You aren't sure why Alastor helped you... or why he allowed you to keep your soul for now.

At the time it took some begging.

You had to grovel to get Alastor to let you keep your soul.

Instead he ordered a... partnership instead of your soul.

You were often asked to help him out for tasks, you have for years.

You consider yourself one of the lucky ones.

Lucky because Alastor liked you enough to not leash your soul.

Something about you intrigued him.

One of the tasks you were summoned to help with was Charlie's hotel.

The girl needs STAFF and Alastor is willing to provide.

It unnerved you when Alastor came back to you after being gone for years.

"Darling~! Did you miss me~? We still have a deal, y'know... hope you didn't forget all about me~?"

Alastor's presence always left you uneasy.

Like most other demons, whenever he was in sight you felt your heart nearly stop.

However, Alastor was the closest demon you had to a friend.

So the feeling was usually easy to smother.

"Why are you here?"

"Once again I have a little job for you, sweetheart. Surely you know to listen, right?"

You knew you had to.

This partnership was the only thing keeping Alastor from taking your soul.

You had to help him... if you didn't, he could take your soul as collateral.

"State your order."

"A dear old friend of mine needs help running a certain hotel. She has no STAFF...! So I need you to come and help, my dear girl..."

His voice is a condescending purr, red eyes holding mischief.

He knows you can't refuse.

So with a heavy sigh, you listen to your dear partner....

This is what brings you to the hotel.

Honestly... you don't regret coming here.

Through Alastor you meet Charlie and the others, pitying Husk's position and trying your best to get along.

In your eyes, you originally were unsure on how to feel on demon rehabilitation.

Could... Sinners really be redeemed?

... Could you be redeemed?

You were unsure until Charlie seemed so adamant.

She looks so happy about it... enough to give you hope.

Although hope is a hard thing to keep when Alastor watches your every move.

The Overlord has to keep an extra eye on you for two reasons.

First of all, you're his favorite to toy with.

Second of all... he doesn't have your soul to pull when you 'misbehave'.

Alastor is clever, he knows what you think.

If he's known you for years, he picks up on your little thoughts.

Alastor can probably tell you get along with Charlie.

A little too well, actually.

At first he allows it, it's just some talk between girls....

However, when he realizes you want to be redeemed...

Alastor feels himself twitch a bit.

He curses himself for not taking your soul earlier.

A partnership won't allow him to pull you.

He has to own you completely.

You can notice the deer demon looking on edge.

His eyes keep glaring into you as you work, the grip on his staff unrelenting.

You sense you're walking on thin ice.

You want to be redeemed, theoretically you can.

But a voice nags you from the back of your mind.

Wouldn't that break your deal?

The thought makes you shudder.

You don't doubt Alastor knows about this.

You can tell once he stops looking as stressed as he was... no... in fact he's smug.

You have a feeling you aren't leaving so easily.

Despite this, you're determined, carefully listening to Charlie and participating in every activity.

Unfortunately... Alastor will step in before you can get anywhere.

"Darling~"

Alastor's voice is in its usual purr, entering your hotel room with a grin.

You fear what's coming.

"What is it you want?"

"Oh you know damn well...."

His voice distorts into static, making you freeze.

You've struck a nerve it seems.

Alastor steps closer, leaning on his staff with a glare.

"You think you're a clever girl, don't you?"

"I'm keeping to our deal, Alastor."

You try to lie, but you can't lie to him.

"You know you aren't, darling. I understand if you want to play along with Charlie's little game..."

He grabs your chin, his hold a painful vice.

"But you'll never be redeemed, girl. Not while I'm here. In fact..."

Alastor's other hand taps your chest, grin turning to a scowl for a moment.

"Call me petty... but I own your soul now."

Your jaw drops.

"What!? No, you can't-"

"I can..."

Alastor hums, manifesting a green chain around your neck.

"And I will..."

The moment your partnership breaks off, Alastor is able to claim your soul.

He feels you broke the deal...

Which means you're his now.

"You had a good run, dear... unfortunately you need to learn your place."

You feel yourself collapse on the floor, Alastor yanking the chain with a newfound grin.

"I've been waiting for this, girl..."

He kneels down, his voice an eager whisper.

"I should've taken your soul long ago, then I wouldn't have to deal with all this stress...!"

He pulls you onto your knees, watching you grovel like you did all those years ago.

"Perfect~" He hums, "This is exactly where you belong..."

You go to retort, but Alastor uses your newfound chain to choke you.

"It's best you be a good girl and listen to me now..."

Alastor hisses, pulling you so you look him in the eyes.

"I happen to hate misbehaving pets."

It was inevitable that he'd claim you... now you're rightfully his and will be for years to come... won't you?

[applestruda]

Ok so i've gotten a couple of people asking me how i color,, so i thought i might like, drop a mini tutorial for how i draw in general. I will explain to the best of my ability, but im not super good at this kind of thing (also this is gonna be a long post)

I will say that usually I go into a drawing with a general idea of what I want to draw, the vibe I want to give, and the colors I want to work with. Of course these can change throughout the process though.

(and side tip is to flip the canvas often, that way it's easy to catch mistakes and tweak them)

So I always start with a sketch, it's not clean or pretty, just meant to give me a good base. And from there I color in the flats

Next I take some darker colors and just throw it on top of the flats, erasing where I want there to be highlights

I then specifically take the brush called stickman (on procreate), and do a wash over the art. I find that it creates a variety of interesting colors and adds some texture.

From there, I take my usual brush (chalk) and I grab the colors created by the previous step, rendering out the form with them

Next is just the highlights, where i pretty much make a good base to start adding details and messing with layer types.

Details! I use a variety of brushes, layer types, and colors, just messing around and seeing what I like. I often stumble across something I like through this method, completely unplanned.

(also to create the wispy effect like what's around the stars, I just grab a color, use whatever layer type I think looks cool, and then go in with my eraser to add more shape to it)

The final couple of steps is still me just messing around with layer types and colors, but usual to the whole drawing instead of specific spots, possibly unifying colors and or trying to push contrasts a little further (it depends on what I'm going for). And then i finish it off with another stickman layer to add more texture back!

And erm,, Yeah! That's kinda it.. In total this took 1 h 11 min.. and honestly most of it is just me messing with things until I like it..

Hope this helps,

[ribbonprincess]

confiscating rafe's drugs, but it's a little bit more comedic

i think he'd start tweaking idk man

(may you write it though, i dont know how to make good prompts so im really trying here)

warnings: drugs (ofc),slight choking,just Rafe being a lil scary.

🍭࿐ ࿔*:･ﾟ

Rafe is pacing in his room when you enter,you can see his shirt clinging to his back due to his sweat as he looks frantic "rafey? what's wrong?" your boyfriend turns around immediately, looking at you with a hard glare that makes you freeze in your spot "I can't find my coke- have you taken it? I know you did,where is it?" he asks,pointing a finger at you as he comes closer with long strides.

"what- I don't know what you are talking about... why would I have your drugs anyway?" "cause you've been complaining about how I've been doing them too often,so I know you have them. Give them to me, right now." You furrow your eyebrows before shaking your head at him "no,I won't. I don't like when you take it, you've been doing it too much and you become all angry and...weird-"

Your words are cut off due to a pair of rough hands clasping your throat "you will go and take what's mine and give it back,Is that clear?" you let a small whimper escape,gripping on his wrists as tears start to gather on your lashline "don't want to... I've,I've thrown them down the toilet" you lie,knowing them well they're hiding in your room in one of your drawers under a bunch of clothes.

A small scoff escapes Rafe's mouth making you even more scared as his grip tightens on you before releasing you completely to walk over the window,showcasing a view of the whole tannyhill. "Are they at your house,in your room? hm,tell me- baby please...I need them,you know I do,they make me calm" his hands all over the place,before he harshly dug the heel of his palm in his eyes "hey- no,no...okay I'll give them back,I'm sorry." You're quick to be at his side,pulling his hands away from his face as you wipe at his eyes. "I'll give them to you,I didn't flush them down the toilet- I lied. But you gotta promise me to take a little less at least,for me?"

He looks at you through a blurry gaze before nodding "okay...yeah,okay I'll cut down some dosage. Didn't mean to lose control,I'm sorry" he says,rubbing his thumb over the red spots on your neck sure they'll bruise overnight. It's rare for Rafe to apologize especially multiple times so you just nod and bring him into a hug "it's okay,let's lay down and then we'll go to my house later,okay?" He nods at your words,pressing his forehead against your collarbone "okay...I love you doll"

[truelovepolinator]

The Chaos of the "Friends to Lovers" Quote & the Alleged Antonia Xmas Photos

I honestly have so many thoughts about Nicola and Luke that I usually don't even know where to start. As a result, I often end up saying nothing. Other folks are already talking about things so eloquently, and even when I don't entirely agree, I agree enough that I like it, move on, and wonder whether it's worth chiming in with my takes.

But today I do feel like tackling yesterday's craziness - the newly discovered article (and those hot photos) and the weirdness that erupted with the alleged family photo(s?) with Antonia.

This was a lot of chaos and excitement for one day and I found myself drowning a bit in the swell of it all.

Part of me was as thrilled as everyone to read those words that Luke said about friends to lovers, and also what Nic said about Luke making everything better. This story seemed to just confirm and crystallize everything I ever thought, that all of us true believers have thought. He said it. He said it right out loud.

But then there was the part of me that couldn't help but question it. Was it taken slightly out of a context that might have softened the meaning had it been included? Had the translation from English (Luke's original words) to Spanish back to English slightly tweaked the thought or expression of the thought in a way that implied slightly more than he originally intended?

Also, why would he/they just admit everything fully out in the open for this one random interview with a Chilean reporter, then retreat and go back to pretending to be just friends everywhere else (even if they never said "just" friends).

Then again, a point both for and against the accuracy of the implication of this quote is the fact that he came very close to saying this several other times. About how appropriate it felt that Polin was friends to lovers that they were friends... and he'd just sort of trail off or not quite continue the thought. So that seemed to make it both more probable that he might have inadvertently finished the thought one time, and also less probable that he would have said it so explicitly this one time when he never did any other time. Could the original translation have taken liberties in finishing the thought?

Bottom line, who knows? And I found myself wondering WHY I was wondering when, at the end of the day, I still totally believe they're together. So why question this quote so hard?

Perhaps there's just something inherently dangerous about allowing myself to believe they (even inadvertently) confirmed it. I already believe. I really do. So why does the thought of him having actually said it out loud feel so chaotic? Why was everyone whipped into a frenzy by this line when we could already see it? And why is this story just now making its way into our collective consciousness?

There's so much about this ship that doesn't make a lot of sense. I've had a few fictional ships I've loved, but I have never felt this much attachment to a celebrity couple before. Not even close. I'm sure I never will again. They are so special, and their connection is so unusual and obvious that it's hypnotic and magical. It feels like a privilege to witness such a magical and precious thing.

But perhaps it is precisely because their connection feels so magical and precious that it feels more elusive. For Luke to explicitly confirm what we all saw feels like very nearly stepping onto the solid ground of a previously misty, distant shore. But then, they took it back with every subsequent (and prior) interview, leaving us wobbly and unmoored.

And then the rumor of the Christmas photos with Antonia hit. I never saw these photos and only heard everything after the fact, so it's hard for me to draw conclusions. It sounds like the photos were inappropriately taken from a memorial page and not new, so not only were they disrespectful, but potentially also not remotely relevant to Luke's current relationship and life.

And even if she was with his family last year, there seem to be at least half a dozen explanations for that (just a friend or casual date with nowhere to go? Friend of his sister's? there at Christmas time, but for a different occasion and not actually "Christmas with the Newtons").

I also found myself confused by people insisting she was in the Maldives for work while others insisted she and her father were in a trailer somewhere? So which is it? Trailer Christmas with dad? Or dance gig in the Maldives? And perhaps most importantly, why does anyone know any of this because why is anyone following her, let alone her father, this closely?

I confess all of this chaos did drive me to check her stories and I saw the (apparently) Maldives videos. But I don't know what any of this proves.

I wrote extensively about my belief that Nic and Luke are together (see my blog: Nicola and Luke Are Absolutely Together and Have Been All Along and Here's How I Know), and that the relationship with Antonia has been a fake PR strategy to distract us all along. But I'd be lying if I said these little flare-ups don't make me wobble slightly in that boat as I continue trying to set foot on dry land. I don't feel like I know enough about how L & A met, how/if she's friends with his sister, what the deal is with that friend group, etc. And all those questions leave a tiny space for uncertainty.

Still, what's with the timing of that photo? The same day this story spreads like wildfire where Luke says OUT LOUD the very thing we've been wanting to hear and they've been trying to distract from? Seems to me a good PR agent who was paid to keep eyes off the real relationship might identify that as a moment to drop some confusing content and muddy the waters again. Don't want folks getting too close to the truth, after all.

The truth is, none of us can know the truth definitively because we don't know them. But again and again, when I look at the actual facts and the extensive evidence and crumbs, the only crumbs that fit together into a whole that makes sense are the Nic and Luke crumbs.

For the record, I have not a doubt in my mind that Nicola is *not* dating Jake. That one is crystal clear because after allowing some uncertainty to linger (part of the distraction strategy), they have all collectively shown us the truth.

Remember, Nicola has NEVER shared her love life publicly. All these photos with Jake are actually proof of a negative, that he is NOT her bf. Thinking that her photos with him are proof of their romantic relationship represents a fundamental lack of understanding of who Nicola is, let alone Jake and their shared friend group.

I do believe that she and Luke will go public eventually for two reasons. The least of these is for the fans. The fans want it so bad that one day they will relent and show us. But the more important reason is that when you find the one, and you love them with all your heart, you don't want to hide it forever. Live privately, yes, but not hide. When they feel settled and confident enough, and perhaps when the glare of the spotlight has died down enough, they will finally share. That's what I believe.

Could I be wrong? Of course. Could this hypothetical relationship with Antonia be real? I suppose. But if it is, it's the weirdest damn thing I ever saw. I will never get over the strangeness of the InStyle LA photos, and in particular, that one at the cafe with the white truck. There's something just inherently fake and fishy about the way their hypothetical relationship manifests. And since their pap photos, implied togetherness photos, and weird "likes" patterns all follow a classic PR fake relationship playbook, I have a hard time believing it.

Also, I feel much better about him with Nic than with Antonia, for a variety of reasons I won't go into because I don't want to spread hate.

If I am wrong, I will be heartbroken. I admit it. I believe in NicLuke. Lukola is my endgame. And I don't just think “someday.” I absolutely believe it's happening now. I made my case extensively in my prior blog. People seem to want to read the signs a million different ways, but all the signs I've seen point directly to Nicola and Luke being together now. So that's where I'm sticking.

Let the ship wobble. I'm not going anywhere.

[urautismdiagnosis]

Captain Barnacles my beloved (click for higher quality)

<reblogs appreciated :>

My glorious man, my most wonderful guy ever

random thoughts about him under the cut

Sob I'm so many years behind in octonauts episodes I'm barely scratching the iceberg lmso but my general vibe of octonauts above and beyond so far is that "Holy Sht Global Warming" and also My tiny Friends Have Grown!! Like dude I'm so proud of them all lol

Honestly to me the captain is just in his 30s, somewhere in there, idk what his role is in the found family (father figure?? big brother???) but honestly I adore his relationships with each of the octonauts (esp with dashi ahahhagugugh!!!! and peso too augdhbf Theyre so precious he's so proud of them) I love how he and tweak just get eachother and kwazii is just like His Favorite Little Guy??? and shellington, my god-

Like this guy just adopts everything in sight istg- <3

Im starting to realize that either my autism is blinding me or maybe he's autistic too and like??? Theater kid ahhh playing the accordion and bursting into song?? Mr "I am so full of obsession and love for all of this and all of you", Mr " I got my gup struck by lightning, my arm crushed by a clam, stung by a jellyfish, nearly attacked by barracadas, thrown around violently on the back of a wall, crashed into a sunken ship, and then nearly drowned and Hahaha Yes Im Fine did you all need anything?" LIKE SIR???

Also you just know he went out and got his whole nautical fit, with the hat and everything, and just went "oh crap I cant be the only one uhhhh" and then gave EVERYONE THE CUTEST FREAKING MATCHING HATS!!!

this guy had dreams and they're coming true and all his dreams are BEAUTIFUL-

also my partner was helping me figure out his design and went "omg am I just helping u make him a dilf" and I went "nah we making him a papi" and like damn cuz- sobbing can you tell the conversation happened at A Late Hour At Night.

i gave him a single lower lash this sticks out stylishly and totally didn't give him natural polar bear eyeshadow, I also like to think that he's somewhere on the aro ace spectrum but that might just be me projecting lol

ignore the pic of a compass I stole btw that doesn't matter

i think the design might still have some room for improvement so if I've made it this far lmk if u think it could use any fun touches

(also this guys body type KILLED ME it took me sooo many tries)

ᵃˡˢᵒ ᶦᵏ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ᵇᵃʳⁿᵃᶜˡᵉˢ ⁿᵃᵐᵉ ᶦˢ ᵏᶦⁿᵈᵃ ʳᶦᵈᶦᶜᵘˡᵒᵘˢ ᵗᵒ ᵃˡᵒᵗ ᵒᶠ ᵖᵉᵒᵖˡᵉ, ᵇᵘᵗ ᶦᶠ ᵘ ᵗʰᶦⁿᵏ ᵃᵇᵒᵘᵗ ᶦᵗ, ᵇʸ ᵖᶦʳᵃᵗᵉ ˢᵗᵃⁿᵈᵃʳᵈˢ ᶦᵗ ʷᵒᵘˡᵈ ᵇᵉ ᵃ ᵛᵉʳʸ ˢᶦᶜᵏ ᵃⁿᵈ ᶦⁿᵗᶦᵐᶦᵈᵃᵗᶦⁿᵍ ᵃⁿᵈ ᵖᵒʷᵉʳᶠᵘˡ ⁿᵃᵐᵉ. ᶜᵘᶻ ʸᵏ, ᵏᵉᵉˡʰᵃᵘˡᶦⁿᵍ…

i bet he misses bianca alot poor guy,

also here's my most cursed head canon: he's a polar bear and is often in very warm environments, so y'all think he just like.... cuts and thins his fur?

Im so sorry y'all but I can just imagine him at 2 am just crying next to a pile of his own fur because oh God this is so hard, I imagine the whole process of doing that to ur whole body routinely with tools that break is probably similar to the process of undoing protecting braids for folks who have afro textured hair, but I wouldn know personally I've just heard how much the process can be time consuming and be kinda tiring 0-0

Also I cant believe I haven't mentioned this yet but I think he's like 8 feet tall, which compared to most of his crew being at smallest 4.7 to 5.8 he's just huge compared to them XD. I tried to make like conversions based on irl animals and etc, but the captain is like literally The Tallest A Person Can Be. Like y'all know polar bears are The Largest and Tallest pawed mammals to exist??? like 13 feet tall irl

im just so proud of him he is so compassionate and supportive and cares so much about everyone and everything-

fanny pouch ahh belt

[fallout-lou-begas]

Not sure if you’ve been asked this before, but what are your favorite/essential mods for new vegas? I’ve only ever played it unmodded so I’m curious

Good question! I definitely have answered this before, but that was so many years ago. It's only now that I've taken the opportunity to overhaul and modernize my own mod set-up that I've been figuring out the answer to this question myself. But I can definitely talk you through the most important parts of my new load order.

First, however, every single person modding this game in this day and age absolutely needs to start with the Viva New Vegas modding guide, and follow every step to the letter. The recommendations are air-tight and the instructions are written and presented as if you, the reader, have never even seen so much as a computer before. It's amazing. The "Base" of VNV contains nothing but bugfixes, lightweight unofficial patches, performance optimizations, and other under-the-hood stuff designed to remedy FNV's infamous stability issues while maintaining a completely "vanilla" feel. This makes it absolutely necessary, in my opinion, even for people who don't actually want to play with any (other) mods. Especially crucial to this guide is its mandate to use Mod Organizer 2; if you're using Nexus Mod Manager, Vortex, or Fallout Mod Manager any time since Biden got elected, you are shooting yourself in the foot plain and simple. The best endorsement that I can give of Mod Organizer 2 is that it mods you game completely virtually, meaning that if you fuck your mods up beyond repair, you can just go to your actual FNV launcher in your root folder and boot up the vanilla game like nothing ever happened.

And the "Extended" section of Viva New Vegas consists of more modding tools, quality of life tweaks, content restorations, and a curated list of strongly recommended gameplay modifications that nevertheless all come down to your personal preference (though deviating from their provided list may make you use your brain a little bit when choosing the right compatibility patches, and so on).

This isn't going to cover every single thing that I play with, but here's everything that I would think to suggest to anybody who asked. With that said, here's Fallout "Lou" Begas's Mod Recommendations, 2024 Edition:

Viva New Vegas Extended: Lou's Preferences

VNV Extended recommends several gameplay modifications that come down to personal preference. I installed just about all of them, with a few exceptions (I don't care at all for B42 Optics, for example). Here's some specific details:

Just Assorted Mods has a hell of a lot of features but I actually enable are breath-holding, the vanilla sprint, and the loot menu (though I flip-flop often on using JAM's Bullet Time in place of V.A.T.S.). If you install VNV and boot up the game and wonder "what is all this fucking shit on my HUD," it's probably some of Just Assorted Mods's components. Just disable the ones you don't want in the in-game Mod Configuration Menu, which you will also have available if you followed the instructions for VNV Base.

Vigor is a modernized fork of JSawyer, the mod that was originally created by FNV's own director after the game's release that tweaked a lot of under-the-hood game settings and statistical balance to his personal preferences. JSawyer Ultimate Edition a more faithful modernization of the original JSawyer whereas Vigor is "a more lightweight alternative" that dials back some of the more drastic features of JSUE. Your choice of these, or none of them, is purely personal preference, and my preference is for Vigor. Any form of JSawyer is strongly recommended if you play in Hardcore Mode.

Simple Vigor Config is used in conjuncton with Vigor and is an intuitive and easy way to overwrite Vigor's gamesetting changes with your own preference. I use the config to adjust carry weight to a much more punishing (25 + 5*STR) formula that incentivizes the use of backpacks, mindful inventory management, and companion inventory space; and to increase the starvation, thirst, and sleep Hardcore Mode rates to 10, 5, and 14 respectively.

Desert Natural Weathers is the weather mod to end all weather mods, in my view, and it includes configuration for customizing the darkness and visibility of nighttime. This effectively obsoletes former dinosaurs like Darker Nights Ultimate Edition. Refer to the post that I made on DNUE's Nexus page here for a copy of my settings to darken those dang nights with DNW.

In AIStewie's Tweaks's nvse_stewie_tweaks.ini file, I set bCustomSpecialPoints = 1 and iNumPointsToAllocate = 35. This slightly reduced starting stat spread forces you to make tradeoffs in your character creation, because it starts with a perfect middle 5 in every stat. Every addition above average will require a subtraction below average. The "Essentials" INI included with VNV Base is all that most players will ever need, so this is my one specific personal tweak that'll keep you from scrolling through every single option in the whole damn thing (though I also recommend enabling the tweaks that hide all of your skill check tags in dialogue for more immersive and less gamified roleplaying in conversation: set bNoSkillTags, bRemoveFailedSuccessText, bRemoveRedOutline, and iRemoveTags to all = 1. )

Lou's Personally Valuable or Sentimental Tweaks and Fixes

Better Pause Menu Screen (Simple Blur). I play with an ultrawide resolution and the vanilla pause menu filter doesn't actually extend past 1920x1080. So this is really vital, lol.

Vanilla Animations Weapon Scale Fix. This mod will fix a common issue with custom weapons and animation mods where your weapon will become invisible because its scale has gotten stuck at 0.

Companion Carry Weight Fix. All companions in the game have an invisible attribute called "companion suite" that, among other things, halves their carrying capacity based on their actual stats. If you play with a super low carry weight formula like I do, you can see how this is a problem. Here's the solution.

Miscellaneous Tweaks Collection includes a few files that I get great use out of: No DLC Recipes Early (great unless you integrate DLC crafting ingredients into your base game somehow) and Vendors Have Throwables (why the fuck are throwing weapons so hard to find in vanilla!). There are others that I use as well but I recommend these two the most generally.

Lucky 38 Suite Upgrade Terminal Tweak is a very cute little mod that removes the ugly wall-mounted terminal and makes you purchase your suite upgrades from the actual computer on the desk in the master bedroom instead.

I Fought the Law - Simple NCR Start finally gives you a good reason to check out NCRCF if you're not siding with the Powder Gangers.

Hire Cass Early was my "dream mod" for the longest time, and thanks to some help, it's finally a reality. Simply pick up the letter that this mod adds to the Mojave Express office in Primm and you can recruit Cass right away (through the usual persuasive requirements) without ever stepping off the road from Goodsprings to the Mojave Outpost. Part of my ongoing "make @ikroah real" project.

Harder Strip Access. Getting into Vegas to finally confront Benny should feel like a tremendous accomplishment. This mod makes it so. Better pony up the caps or call in one hell of a favor, kid! With any kind of tougher economy mods, especially, this mod makes it wonderfully Herculean to just buy your way onto the Strip.

Balance Tweaks

Pseudo-Realistic Carry Weight - No Weightless Item Overhaul and Realistic Bottle Cap Weight. The former is actually an optional file; the main file just implements the the carry weight formula that I was coincidentally already using. The latter just forces you to think strategically about how much money you're walking around with. Can you tell that I love inventory management? Note that if you give bottlecaps weight, you should definitely let yourself drop them when necessary by editing Stewie's Tweaks (bShowCurrencyInContainers = 1).

Carry Weight Affects Speed, Med-Tek Trauma Kit (Lou's Version), and More Conditions to Fast Travel. The first appearance of my own mods on this list! These three mods in conjunction tie your encumbrance and your overall health to your mobility far more strictly. I love the balancing act of packing enough supplies for an excursion while leaving enough room for loot that I can still fast travel with, and the choice to get greedy with more loot than I can comfortably carry and just hope to not run into danger on my slow walk back toward a merchant. My tweaks to the classic Med-Tek Trauma Kit mod apply this level of emergent gameplay and resource management to your limb health, though it makes the game much more difficult unless your character specializes in Medicine. I haven't tried it myself, but Simple Healing System is fully configurable, modern mod that I've had my eyes on and that might be better for most general playstyles, and it might even be compatible in conjunction with my Med-Tek mod for extra intensity!

Better Charisma (Charisma Affects Dialogue Skill Checks) and/or Charisma Affects Reputation. I've always been very frustrated with how much of a meaningless dump stat Charisma is, and the phenomenon of the 1 CHA 100 Speech player character in general. These two mods, which you can use just one of or both together, give Charisma much more meaningful and palpable functionality.

Terrifying Presence (Lou's Version), speaking of Charisma, changes the requirement for this perk from Level 6 and 70 Speech to Level 2 and 6 CHA, making it much more accessible to more types of intimidating characters. This same mod includes alternate options to take it as a trait instead, with the drawback(s) of either tanking your Speech and Barter and/or increasing your addiction chance. See also: Less Snarky Terrifying Presence.

New Vegas Karma Rebalance is a great under-the-hood mod that makes FNV's nearly vestigial karma system less nonsensical without removing it or its effects on the player entirely. Thanks to this and Mass Ownership Tweaks, which is already included in VNV Extended's recommendation of Essential Vanilla Enhancements Merged, Cass won't hate your guts just for stealing a few things from Caesar's Legion at Cottonwood Cove, especially not after you've already killed them all.

Damage Multiplier solves the sluggish damage sponge problem that plagues Bethesda engine combat by simply multiplying all damage dealt globally, both by and to the player, by a factor of your choosing. I use 2.5x, which is usually enough to kill any level-appropriate human being with a single shot to the head. 2x should be the minimum. Combine with Combat Enhancer NVSE and NPCs Use Ammo for overall faster but much more ferocious and intense combat engagements.

Visuals and Animations

Third Person Camera Overhaul. Though I'm still getting used to its extremely specific configuration settings, this is vital for a third-person enjoyer like myself. It obsoletes any and all "dynamic camera" or "shoulder swap" mods of the past. Once you figure out how it works and what you like, you're set for life.

Realistic Movement and Dramatic Inertia. Although a little goofy, it has never felt better for me to physically move around in the game than it has before. I like the weight and get-up-and-go that this mod has for me as a player, but it's especially significant in firefights and other combat situations where, now, your targets can't dodge bullets by shifting direction instantly or stopping and turning on perfect dimes. For a single, less heavyweight alternative, try 360 Movement and Diagonal Movement together instead. Each pair of these mods is incompatible with the other pair, however.

B42 Loot, B42 Interact, and B42 Inject. I recommend a lot of the B42 family of animation overhauls in general (except B42 Optics, lol) because I just love seeing my character actually do the things they're doing. For B42 Loot, I use the included config file to disable the "force pull" effect, and for B42 Interact, there exists compatibility patches between it and its more third-person oriented counterpart Animated Ingestibles, but I'd only look into that if you know what you're doing (though, I do).

Character Kit Remake is a mod that I was turned onto recently. For a long time I have scoffed at character appearance overhauls out of nostalgia for those classic gamebryo engine potato-faces and what I thought was, to be blunt, the tasteless ineptitude of the actual overhauling. But I do really like this one, even if the showcase of screenshots do a really bad job of selling it. It looks a lot better in motion and in game, I promise. i think that these people are just not good digital photographers.

Height Randomizer. It's funny how much you can get attached to a minor character when they are, for whatever reason, especially tall or short. This lightweight mod just adds some height variance to all NPCs in the game that don't already have a non-normal 1.00 height setting in vanilla.

The Strip Groove. Dance on command. Endorsed.

Items, Economy, Crafting, Survival, Repair, Etc.

Gloves Galore (Lou's Version), Power Armor Gloves, Combat Armor Gloves, and White Glove Society Wear Gloves. Anyone who has followed me long enough on here should know that I have strong, totally normal feelings about gloves.

Armed to the Teeth Redux and literally any backpack mod. I've used this duffel bag forever, for example. I love these ones because I personally love when you can physically, literally see the things that a character is supposed to be carrying.

Flashlight NVSE. Another piece of Agnes Sands's arsenal, this is the one "old" mod that I can't quit. Even if it is a little janky, I've yet to find a better directional flashlight mod. Only install this is you think you can handle wrestling with it a little, and make sure your "Exterior" flashlight settings are all on the lowest quality regardless of computer specs (or else it causes flickering). It's a must-have for darker nights, too.

Famine is the last "loot scarcity" mod you'll ever need. Combine it with Harder, Barter, Faster, Stronger from the VNV Extended recommendations list for a really tough time affording even basic necessities without tailoring your build for mercantile success... which is just how I like it.

Cheaper Repair Costs. The vanilla formula for determining the cost of weapon and armor repairs at merchants is, in a word, fucked, where it literally costs twice the weapon's base value to repair it from broken. This mod lets you adjust that proportion so that you won't be better off literally selling and buying another gun in every single case. I play with a rate of 67% (which means that paying a merchant to repair a completely broken weapon from 0% health to 100% health will cost 67% of the weapon's base value).

Alternative Repairing does too much cool, practical shit to the base repairing system to even get into here. To keep it short, it intuitively incentivizes actually scrounging for all kinds of formerly useless junk that you can now scrap for spare parts. Check it out.

Water Overhaul. Ever play with a Universal Water Bottling mod and find things suddenly far too easy? Water Overhaul combines all the convenience and sense-making of bottling water anywhere with the much-needed tradeoff of truly purified water being much rarer. All that convenient H2O is now just radioactive enough to keep Goodsprings Source from singlehandedly breaking the survival economy of the game (not to mention the literal economy).

Cowboy Coffee and Coffee Grounds, my own mod that adds brewable coffee to the wasteland. While mostly just created because it's cute, it's really nice to have a reliable and palpable source of sleep deprivation relief when playing in Hardcore Mode.

Gun Oil From Animal Fat, another mod of mine that provides a cheaper, craftable, and less demanding but less effective repair option to complement Weapon Repair Kits. I patched this one recently to fix some old issues, and it's great for incentivizing emergent gameplay (since you need to hunt for meat, and cook the meat for fat, and combine the fat with loot to make the gun oil).

Sound

Less Constant Music and Passive Combat Music Tweaked do exactly what they say on the tin and are perfect for people who like to get immersed in the natural sound of their environment, especially if you're a chronically stealthy player like me and you've trained yourself to constantly listen for enemy footsteps. I do recommend keeping Less Constant Music disabled when you first start a game, though, because until I can figure out how to add an exception to it myself, it will remove the background music from character creation at Doc Mitchell's house more often than not, and I really like that music.

SPEAKING of Doc Mitchell's music, Try Not To Get Killed Anymore is one of the first mods I ever made and it has never left my load order. It simply replaces the musical sting that plays when you die with an emphatic, tolling bell and the refrain from Doc Mitchell's theme, plus an optional version that includes his ghostly voice telling you to try not to get killed anymore. Two of my other personal sound replacers are the Mysterious Stranger Level-up Theme, Simple Snap Sound Effects for Quest Updates, and Mechanical Camera VATS.

[alexanderwales]

My juniper bonsai died. I had gotten it at a bonsai class, where I pruned and repotted and trained it, and had it for about a year. I was so happy that it lived through the winter, and I kept it watered, looking at the new growth and seeing where I would eventually make it take shape into something a little more interesting. But it's dead now. I had noticed the tips getting brown, and that meant it wasn't getting enough water, so I watered it more often, making sure the soil was moist. The tips got more brown, and then over the course of two days, some critical process inside the miniature tree failed, and the whole thing went brown and dead. I'm not entirely sure what went wrong, which is frustrating, because it means that if I make a second bonsai from a cheap little Home Depot juniper, there's a good chance that it, too, will die.

As time goes on, the thing I enjoy more and more about video games is how legible everything is. You press a button and something predictable happens. You screw up and you understand why, and how to fix it. Even a hard game, like Dark Souls, lets you understand why you died to the boss and what you can do better next time. You can say to yourself "okay, shield for the first two attacks, dodge for the heavy attack at the end, then punish with a heavy attack and back off".

I've been editing the first book of my webnovel, Thresholder, and I am just mired in an inability to understand whether the changes I'm making are actually improving it. Everything is done by feel and rules of thumb. I'm trying to be bold, but I'm charging off into the fog, unable to see where I'm going. I've always hated editing, not necessarily the line edit stuff to remove clunky phrasing (which is fine) but the larger scale stuff, trying to hammer a good story into a great one, removing unnecessary characters and winnowing down a scene until it's just the exposed heart.

If I could have a minor superpower, it would be to see, in real time, the audience average score for a piece of writing before it was released. I could tweak a line and get some feedback on whether it was better or worse. I could change a character's name and see whether people liked it better. I could do A/B testing.

But writing in real life has very long feedback cycles, even if you're posting things online, and it's difficult to know whether you've made something good until after it's out in the world.