#I've never had anyone get angry with me about how I dress/look in public which I appreciate a lot

[solradguy]

Spending a lot of time and money to make a custom bright red leather jacket just to be the specialist man in the bakery section of the grocery store was such a great investment. I love my red jacket. Everyone should make their own special jacket

[swan-orpheus]

finale:

noun

noun: finale; plural noun: finales

the last part of a piece of music, a performance, or a public event, especially when particularly dramatic or exciting."the festival ends with a grand finale"

Did it feel like that to anyone? Because I feel like they were unclear on the concept. It was not devoid of excitement, but it was far from being "particularly dramatic or exciting". It took a rather safe course with a bit of lackluster window dressing and one or two gut punches that end abruptly before we can properly process them or respond emotionally, to get the characters to the confrontation with the villain which winds down in much the way that you'd expect, and all of that after swiftly and perfunctorily solving various problems/tying up some loose ends that were pieces of story to be told rather than distractions to be sorted and discarded without pause or a second thought.

Hemlock doesn't even try to prolong things by talking or justifying his attitudes and behavior in a way that might have made him more compelling. He just tosses out the empty-ish threat of taking Omega down with him (as desperate villains often do in this situation) and Omega , who at all times need to be in control in this ep, cheekily retorts. They make the shot, they go home. And there is some perfunctory dialogue in there about making amends or finding one's path etc. I would even go so far as to say that a bit of the dialogue in the finale felt akin to small talk-underwhelming and space filling. I was waiting for someone to Say The Thing or to Go There and it rarely winds up happening, that moment where you punch the air and go, "Yes!".

There is not very much emotional payoff and when we did get any, I felt kind of numb, usure how to react. We don't get to see Crosshair react to having his hand amputated, we don't get to see Emerie get angry because she's been a victim, or Hemlock lose his all pervasive cool as he's about to die. Jax doesn't start to freak out as they are climbing or seize up because one motivational sentence is enough to allow him to climb an absurd amount of rungs up a vertiginous shaft.

As somone who is terrified of heights, I can tell you, that is not what happens. I tried walking across the Golden Gate Bridge as a child and I started to panic. I still cannot do it as an adult. I feel weird all over and "bad" and my legs stop working.

I would have liked it if Omega and company had had to help him there and they all had had a chance to acknowledge being afraid rather than tossing in a joke about the baby sleeping through the Zillo. It would have made the danger feel more immediate. As it was, I did not for one moment feel afraid for the kids. In fact, I rarely felt afraid for anyone in the finale. It felt rather devoid of stakes for the issue that I think I've outlined of the tone being off. I ought to have been afraid for Wrecker but he keeps getting hit over and over again and gets up every time which signaled to me that they were not serious about making good on their threat to kill him. The same thing occurs with Crosshair when Hemlock threatens to recondition him for good. We pan away and then it is never even brought up again which felt like part of the scene was missing. (Not that I would have wanted the cliché scene of Crosshair fighting his brothers and struggling against it after he's already completed an entire arc where he defeats his demons so to speak...) Was this supposed to be the followup to Rampart's remark doubting that Crosshair has changed? Do not even get me going on that dropped thread.

We speed past logistical issues in a way that is incongruous in order to arrive at the happy ending, and then once we get back to Pabu, it feels like a relief but also oddly underwhelming. Echo looks over at Omega but they do not exchange words after their mutual ordeal or so much as hug. He's been stabbed in the back/shoulder but barely flinches.

I was so caught up in what never got explained or addressed or commented on that I was having a hard time connecting with Omega and Hunter in the epilogue, which also had my brain going, "Okay, but where is everyone else? And what about this thing and that thing and...."

If something resonates emotionally and you get recognition of and closure on the urgent bits, then you are not left in a muddle by the conclusion or wondering how certain things were apparently magically solved or why they are glossed over.

The happy ending actually feels earned in that case.

[sexatoxbridge]

Isn't Jason the villan for scaring the nanny in the first place?

I know I've been focusing on the nanny especially with the NDA question, but I should make it clear that I don't think either Olivia or Jason are good people based on several factors and both of them, if we're to believe those texts, appear to have treated someone who works for them terribly.

That being said, there is no way for anyone to know what's happened based on the information we have. And it certainly doesn't help that it's from the Daily Mail, which is on par with Deux Moi for credibility.

It's entireply possible that the nanny is telling the truth and Jason was emotionally abusing her while Olivia refused to "engage" or step in to help this woman in any way and instead sent Jason the nanny's texts knowing he was already drunk and angry. In pretty much every scenario it does seem like Jason was completely out of line. Which is why it's strange that despite the text messages the apparent quotes from this nanny seem to show a lot of empathy for Jason.

The entire narrative formed around those texts seem to focus on one thing and that's how Olivia was definitely dating Harry. It seems like an incredibly far-fetched idea that she would let this article get out given how terribly it makes her and Jason look (her abandoning her children for a pop star who won't even publicly confirm they're together and him acting in a violent and manipulative manner). However, the fact that the article was taken down once everyone had a chance to read and screenshot it and that there was an almost immediate response from both Olivia and Jason together is giving me major side eye because you're telling me that a couple who couldn't even exchange custody papers amicably are suddenly going to have a joint statement in less than six hours?

What is kind of becoming a distinct possibility to me is that while these texts are probably real, the entire story written around it is not. The things being said are all over the place. Olivia is suddenly in love with Harry and ditching her family for him but she's also still sleeping with Jason and skinny dipping in their pool? Like what? And now both Olivia and Jason are saying the nanny is lying about the conditions of her employment and her departure, but at the end of all this you have a story out there that heavily details her involvement with Harry, conveniently at a time where breakup rumours are high and in a situation where a large portion of people who are cursed with the knowledge of anything to do with all this think it's a PR stunt.

The film sucked, but what's become clear is that their is no lack of interest in the drama and gossip surrounding it, so since Olivia is clearly never going to get the award buzz she anticipated from this car crash of a film (which she very well may have if she'd stuck to the fuckin story instead of rewriting the shit out of it to give herself more screentime) she's getting publicity the most effective and proven way...with more gossip. Her, Jason, fuckin salad dressing, and Harry have all been trending since yesterday and it's becomoe abundantly clear this woman has no shame when it comes to self-promotion so I wouldn't be surprised if this story was allowed to be released by her just so she could come out hours later with Jason to say these are all lies.

I dunno it all seems weird and I feel really bad for their children being used as the central narrative for so much of this.

[sons-of-the-morning-star]

DISCLAIMER FOR ANY SENSITIVE READERS: This series is going to deal with heavy topics like abandonment, death, guilt, grief, and a lot of other stuff; this first chapter in particular is probably going to be pretty heavy for the same reason.

I will be writing this is present tense and will be constantly be saying, "if this was a show, this would happen or this is what we see," both because I originally thought of it as a show and because this is a screenplay, but more narratively cohesive.

Got that? GREAT!!!

Let's dive in!!!!!!!!!

Chapter/Episode 1: Union- Part 1

We start off in darkness with the sound of crackling fire in the background. One by one, a red light shines and silhouettes five figures, all standing in a circle as they face each other. If this was a show, the camera would be behind one of these figures as he and the other figures eye each other.

He starts a fire in his hand and two figures bristle while the other two back away-

An alarm clock blares out and we cut to a dark bedroom in a hotel suite, like the sound of the alarm woke US up, along with the character sleeping, who groans as his alarm keeps blaring.

After MAYBE the fifth chime, he sighs and slaps the alarm clock off, his arm slipping down his nightstand and droppong to the side of his bed.

His hand curls into a fist as the door is knocked on.

"Mr. Wagner? Are you awake yet?"

Yes! We start with our boy Lucius Wagner!

Lucius loudly humms, "Mm-hm" and sits up.

"You have an interview at nine', a meeting at a quarter to noon, and a conference at five'. Looks like another busy day."

He hears the person- man, woman, it doesn't matter- walk away and stands up from his bed to pull the curtain to his room back only to wince when the light hits his face.

It's too early for the sun to be so bright.

Despite being tired and not wanting to write to people because he can't talk, Lucius gets ready for his day.

Back to what we'd see if this was a show: the camera would be on Lucius as he stares out at the city before he takes a deep breath and turns away. Jump cut to the camera behind and away from Lucius as he turns and walks to the bathroom, turning on the TV before he starts getting ready, more specifically the news.

The camera stays on the TV as we learn Lucius, despite his young age of 22, is running for senator just like his human father did, but he is more successful because not only has crime rate already decreased, but any political opponents he goes against stepped down within minutes of the debate or conference he's in. With no evidence of bribery or any other scandal involved, as criminals are being found dead, one being brought up in todays broadcadt, Lucius is on his way to becoming Sentator of not only Massachusetts, but of the United States as a whole.

We do a transition from Lucius's room to the scene where the camera zooms in on the TV screen as it shows a body under a blanket and we hear the click of a camera and the lens shutters close and open.

On the streets, we now follow Damien Thorn as he gets as close as he can to the scene and the body. He has been investigating these 'accidents' since the arrival of everyone's favorite new politician, who has never spoken a word on camera, never said anything to or against his opponents, and never spoke during interviews. And somehow he's running for senator. Since it seems fishy to him, and because he keeps getting a sick feeling in his stomach when he sees Lucius on the news, he decided to start digging by tracing the criminals who have died and anyone who stepped down from conferences.

The body he is investigating today is a fisher from the town Lucius grew up in, who was charged for numerous cases of assault and fraud.

He is stopped by a police officer when he tries to cross the police tape.

"Sorry, that's close enough."

"It's for the paper. People want to know what's going on."

"They don't need to see this."

Damien scowls as his eyes go black, uttering a "sorry" as he stares the officer down.

The officer's face goes expressionless and just as he lifts the tape, the announcer gets a breaking report.

"This just in! An earthquake near the United Kingdoms has caused the south western quarter of England and Wales to be flooded and taken out to sea!"

Cut back to Lucius in his room as he chokes and gags on his toothbrush; if you've ever hit the back of your tongue while brushing your teeth, you'll get why he gags. He walks out, mouth kind of full of toothpaste and his toothbrush in his teeth, and sees an over head view of the map, showing just how much of England has been wiped out.

For context, here is what was taken out, circled in red⬇️⬇️

Lucius's eyes widen as he takes out his toothbrush.

I'm not good with fractions, but a third or fifth of England is now gone. And-

"While it is right now unknown how many are injured or missing, authorities have reported countless victims were lost in the catastrophe."

Lucius turns off the TV and finishes getting ready, a time jump/transition of Lucius going to the bathroom to spit out the toothpaste and then transitioning to him looking up from washing his face, like he leans down to spit out the toothpaste wearing no shirt and with some shower head, but when he leans back up, he's in a black dress shirt, about to tie his tie, his hair is tidy, and he is rubbing his face dry with a towel.

Part of England gone. Just like that.

It's a pretty shocking thing to imagine, with possibly hundreds or thousands of people being wiped out in the blink of an eye and the cause somehow being an earthquake.

Seems sort of fishy, if you ask me.

Lucius tries shrugging it off as he leaves his room, dressed to impress, and heads out for breakfast and his interview.

Cut to a pair of men walking on the sidewalk, the white-blonde haired one panicked and finicky while his red haired partner is swaggering beside him with a briefcase. The more brightly dressed man keeps "oh"-ing and whimpering , which is driving his more darkly attired kind of insane.

An angel and a demon.

If you've seen Good Omens, you KNOW who there two are

"Angel, stop muttering. You sound like you're summoning Satan himself."

"What if we can't find him? And what if he says 'no?'"

"We'll make him say 'yes.'"

Aziraphale looks down at the briefcase and then nods.

"And just how are we going to find him?"

"We found the antichrist once. We can find him again."

Aziraphale stops and gives him a withering look.

"Another one. We can find another one."

SPEAKING OF THE DEVIL'S SON!!!

Just as the two continue, they bump into a certain photographer that makes Aziraphale shudder like he's just gotten into an ice bath and Crowley smell either blood or smoke.

This wasn't what Crowley had in mind, but it's a start.

"Oi! 'Scuse me!"

Damien turns as he keeps walking. "Sorry, I have to hurry to..."

Aziraphale now starts trembling and Damien gets a sick feeling in his stomach, not like with seeing Lucius, like he has an air bubble in his stomach or really bad period cramps.

Crowley narrows his eyes behind his sunglasses and steps closer.

"Where you off to so quickly?"

Damien fights a gag as he continues to back away. "I-Interview. Wagner's see-seeing someone. Im-Important for the news."

Crowley steps closer and pulls Damien close by his color, making Damien pale and fall to his knees.

"Lucius Wagner?"

Damien nods.

Aziraphale and Crowley exchange glances before looking back at Damien, Aziraphale taking the briefcase away so Damien can recompose himself.

Cut to Lucius in the middle of his interview, which is being recorded on the news. So far he has been asked the basic political questions and he gave the correct answers to get people to love him. Then comes in ANOTHER breaking news report.

Part of California, Arizona, and New Mexico has also been flooded, but there aren't as many people missing as England.

"Mr. Wagner? How do you see yourself helping the families that are now broken by this tragedy?"

Before Lucius can answer, two people catch his eye.

Like when Damien saw him, Lucius gets a sick feeling in his stomach until he sees two young men, one scowling with wavy blond hair and the other with brown hair and the giddiest smile on a boy.

Suddenly, a member of the crowd pulls a gun out and shoots at Lucius, who throws himself and the woman he's interviewing with to the ground.

The blond smirks and the brunette grows angry.

The shooter gets a look of pure despair on his face as he drops to his knees letting the police drag him away.

Lucius is escorted away instead gets a call.

His schedule has changed completely. He must now go a military base, where a private jet is waiting for him to take him home; his address is classified to the public, so no one knows where he lives.

Cut to Lucius walking through a crowd as he tries to get to his jet, trying his best to wave at the paparazzi and camera people.

"Mr. Wagner, if you'll let me ask you-"

The man who asked grabs Lucius's arm and the two meet eyes. You know that part of the forst Lucius game where time freezes and you see your target with the screen tinted red? Lucius and Damien met eyes and time freezes entirely as they stare at each other and feel the growing urge to kill each other.

They don't hear anyone or anything. They only see each other.

Both are wide eyed as they realize who or what the other is and glare at each other.

Luckily, a body guard punches Damien away and helps Lucius to the jet, where he takes his seat and lets out a breath as he loosens his tie and tips his head back.

"So sorry for all that, Mr. Wagner, sir."

Lucius looks over to see someone like an air flight attendant and writes them a message.

'Don't worry about it. I've had worse happen.'

"Well, at least you're headong home, after all this."

Lucius nods and leans back once more, getting comfortable for his flight to home sweet home.

It's a relatively short flight, mostly because we'd see a timelapse of the sky and Lucius napping in his seat before we cut to him in his house.

Being a senator in the running, Lucius is on a very nice house, one he keeps clean and well furnished. Think Lucifer's penthouse in the shiw Licifer, but it's an actual house and doesn't have a wall of alcohol, just a small cabinet in his parlor and shelf in his fridge.

He turns on a light and nearly jumps out of his skin when he sees Crowley sitting in his living room.

"Hello, Me. Wagner. Nice flight?"

Lucius recomposes himself and raises an eyebrow as he holds a hand out. 'How did you get in here?'

"Just a bit of miracle work from a demon. Takes one to know one, right?"

Lucius takes a seat as he writes a message, showing it to Crowley with narrow eyes.

'I don't exactly know who you are, but you don't have the right to make an accusation like that.'

"You're one of the sons of Satan, I'm pretty sure I do."

'My father was Charles Wagner.'

"Ah, yes, the loon that killed your mother and his own staff while you were sent to the nut house."

'He tried to kill me.'

"Eye for an eye, you prat."

Lucius's eye twitches as he snaps his pen in half, eyes going red.

Crowley only smirks and removes his sunglasses, revealing his snake eyes, befire putting them back on; the lights Lucius has are bright.

Lucius settles and grabs another pen from the coffee table and writes a new message.

'Antony J. Crowley? It's about time London's famed has paid the US a visit.'

"You would think." Crowley leans forward until his elbiws are on his knees. "Look, you're not going to like this, but there's something we need your help with."

Lucius gets up and shakes his head before leaving a messge on the table, and to go the the kitchen to get a drink; like hell he's dealing with CROWLEY sober.

'I don't know if you've noticed, but I have a country I'll be running soon. I don't exactly have time to help you or your pet angel.'

Crowley snarls and follows Lucius to see the young man about to take a sip of a drink.

"Don't you think it's weird that parts of England and America are just gone? That the ocean just took them away and an earthquake was the cause?"

Lucius pauses and lowers his drink slightly, eyes on Crowley as he nods and gestures for the snake eyed demon to continue.

'I'm listening.'

And that will be it for part 1 of Chapter/Episode 1!!!! Man, was this fun to write!!!! Like I said, this is just part 1 and I will be continuing with Chapter/Episode 1 Part 2, I promise!

Sorry for all the yelling, I'm really excited!!

Thank you all so much for reading this and I hope you all have a happy and safe holiday season!!!

[michaelneedssomefics]

Haloween

Pairing: Peter Parker x reader

Word count: 2k+

Warnings: Smut, cursing, tiny bit of angst.

A/N: This is the first fic I've ever written, so please leave your opinion! Also you're more than welcome to send asks and requests :) I kinda want to try head cannons aswell.

You and Peter have been dating for the past couple of months, and you've went as far as sex before, both of you took each other's virginity and kept the sex pretty much vanilla.

It's October and Halloween parties are happening almost every night, both you and Peter knew about them and were invited to them, but Peter isn't really into the whole "partiying" idea and you'd rather spend the night with him if you were already free.

You were shopping for your costume for the Halloween dance when your eye suddenly cought a bright red on one of the racks. You walked towards it and saw it was a Victoria Secret angel costume. It had red stockings, attached to a full body red silk lingerie, a matching robe and white wings. 'Why not just try it on?' You thought to yourself. You took your size and went to the dressing room, tried it on (boy was it hard to get everything into the right holes) you looked at yourself in the mirror and damn you looked stunning. Your boobs were so complemented by this outfit, same goes for your ass. The robe ended barely after your ass, not really trying to hide it.

You would never even think about going like this out in public though, let alone a school dance. But then this idea popped in your head... you've been seeing these youtube videos of girls pranking their boyfriends, wearing scandalous costumes and telling them they’re heading out to a party, to see their boyfriends reaction. A smirk appeared on your face at the thought. You took the costume off, went ahead and paid for it and headed back to you place, too excited about the idea to wait.

When you got home you texted Peter, 'Hey, wanna see u, come over pls? xx'. A few minutes later you heard your phone ping, and saw a message from Peter saying 'sure angel, I'll be there in about 10'. You giggled at the irony of the nickname. 'Oh I'll show you angel' you thought.

After Peter arrived you two watched a horror movie, cuddling each other with a blanket wrapped around the both of you. You both didn't really watch the movie, more talking with each other, and you subtly changed the subject to Halloween, to try and bring up the party subject. "Oh, I was invited to this party tonight and I think I'm gonna go, do you want to come with me?" You asked him, knowing he's not into the whole party idea. "No, I don't really want to, but you have fun". Goody goody.

It was now around 6pm so you excused yourself, saying you need to go get ready. Peter followed you to you bedroom, and laid on the bed, scrolling through his phone while talking with you through your attached bathroom while you were styling your hair and doing your make up. You decided to go with simple waves, leaving your hair down. You did some of your make up as light as you could, so the attention would be all on the outfit. You closed the bathroom door so Peter won't see the outfit before it's on you, the action making him a bit confused since it's nothing he hasn't seen before, but he pushed the thought away, thinking nothing of it.

You were standing in front of the mirror with the full outfit, wings and everything, the robe closed. 'Pete would know I would never go out with something like this' you thought. 'Well, there goes nothing' . You open the bathroom door, walking casually to the full length mirror, as if everything is normal.

Peter was just... staring. 'Wtf?' He thought. Is this really what you're gonna wear to the party? You went over to your shoe rack, picking black high heels. You went over to sit next to peter on the end of the bed, putting on your shoes.

Peter was immediately standing, looking at you suspiciously. You put on the most innocent face you could, looking at him through your eyelashes, "What's wrong?" You asked. He open and closed his mouth, not knowing what to say. Is this ok of him to not want you to go out like this? Since when do you even go out like this? Let alone buy outfits like that one? "You're... you're pranking me or something right? You'd never go out like this". Shit. You knew he knows you too well. "What do you mean 'like this'?" You tried to sound irritated. "I, I mean wearing next to nothing. Are you really going to a party wearing lingerie??" He said in disbelief. Were you really that oblivious? " uh, yea. I'm a Victoria Secret angel, it's the outfit." You said bluntly.

Peter shook his head. "You're, you're not going like that! Are your parents really allowing this??". "My parents are out of town until tomorrow night, they don't need to worry about what I'm wearing. What, were you gonna nark on me or something? Who are you to decide what I wear and to where I wear it?" You said, both of you knew your parents would never allow this, putting aside the fact you would never go out like this. "(Y/N), just thinking about all the guys that would stare at you makes me worried sick! What if one of them tries touching you? I'm not letting that happen!" He says. "Then come with me if you're so worried about a guy staring!" You said, knowing fully well how he hates parties. "No, you know I'm uncomfortable with going to these kind of things (Y/N)" he says quietly. "Then it's your problem, not mine." You copy his tone. "(Y/N) how could you possibly think going out in fucking underwear to a party is ok?!" He half yells, "it's the same as going to the beach in a bathing suit Peter! Besides, I'm wearing a robe, no one will see anything!". "Come on a napkin would cover more then that robe! (Y/N) don't you get me?? I'm gonna be worried to death if you go out like this! No way am I letting any guy a chance to eye fuck you and those fuckers might do more than just looking at you!" He was yelling a lot at this point, and you've never seen Peter this angry and frustrated, and this would also technically be your first big fight, so you decided to stop before things get out of hand.

"Okay okay babe, I was just messing around, I'm not really going anywhere, no one's going to eye fuck me". You said calmly, cupping his cheeks with your hands and looking into his eyes trying to get him to relax. You could see Peter's disbelief at first, eyebrows shooting up, lips lightly parted, and a second later his eyebrows furrowed, his jaw clenched. "Pete-" he didnt let you finish, crashing his lips on yours, kissing you roughly, you gasped in surprise which gave him the chance to slip his tongue into your mouth, you kissing him back immediately after, you tongues fighting for dominance, you lost.

After a few minutes of one of the most passionate kisses you've shared with Peter, you both parted in need of air but peter quickly took off his shirt, then your whole outfit at the same speed, almost ripping your costume in the process, leaving you in nothing.

He picked you up and threw you on the bed, his eyes were so dark, and all you could do was stare at his bare abdomen, never failing to mesmorise you, but your focus was brought back to Peter's eyes as he started talking, "no one gets to see you wearing something like that other than me." He said while taking off his pants, leaving himself in nothing but boxers who left nothing to the imagination, his cock strained against the fabric. You felt yourself getting wet, he was so sexy when he was angry with you. You crawled towards him slowly, reaching up to rub his length through the boxers, pulling out a groan from him.

"Yes, right, no one gets to see me like this other than you baby. Let me make it up to you, make you feel real good", you said, slowly taking off his boxers. Finally, he steps out of his boxers, leaving you face to face with his fully erect cock, his tip a red as angry as he was, a tiny bit of pre cum leaking. You kissed the base, lightly biting and then soothing with your tongue. You then licked excruciatingly slow from the base to the tip, Peter moaning, you start sucking hus tip, each time you bring in you mouth more and more, swirling your tongue around. "Fuck" Peter says breathlessly. He reaches up to your hair, tugging it making you moan, the vibration sending more pleasure to him. You stop your movements suddenly, his cock still halfway inside you mouth, looking up at him, blinking innocently. He's confused at first, then realizing what you're implying he hold your head in place with both of his hands, and slowly starts thrusting into your mouth. He then speeds up, thrusting a little deeper, his head thrown back, moans and curses coming out of his mouth. "Fuck, feels so good, you're never going out like that, fuck, that ass is mine" you hum in agreement, the vibration almost sending him over the edge so he pulls out immediately, a string a saliva hanging from his tip to your tongue.

"Please tell me you're on the pill". He says, pushing you on your back, starting to circle your clit with his thumb while leaning over you with his other arm, "yes, yes, I am, shit" you moan, "good because I wanna cum inside you". He kisses you roughly, spreading your lips with his fingers, "you're so wet, just for me, tell me, would anyone else be able to get you this wet by just sucking their dick?" He asks, kissing your jaw, then your neck right where your sweet spot is. "N-no pete only y-you make me feel like this" you choke out, moaning so loud, you just want him inside you already. "That's right, only I can." He says suddenly flipping you on your stomach making you squeal. He grabs your hips pulling you up, kneading your ass with one hand and the other guiding his cock to your entrance. He slowly fills you up, both of you moaning loudly. Once he's fully in he let's you stretch out a bit, leaning over leaving marks on your shoulders.

Once you're stretched enough you wiggle your ass a bit, looking at him over your shoulder, saying seductively, "please, fuck me". And that's it for him. He pulls almost all the way out, thrusting back in quickly, he kept going like that, making you moan so loud you grabbed a pillow and buried you face in it to muffle your moans. After a while he snakes an arm around your waist pulling you up so his chest is to your back, while still thrusting faster and deeper he circles your clit with his other hands' finger, and you were screaming his name. "fuck (Y/N), gonna cum, gonna cum in that tight pussy, because it's mine, no one else's. Cum with me babe, come on". And that was it, your eyes rolling so far you saw stars, you were tightening around his cock, making him cum too, his thrusts sloppy as you both road out your highs, and you felt his cum dripping down your thighs.

He pulled out, you dropped on your stomach, breathless, and turned on your back to see peter walking over to the bathroom, coming back with a warm cloth, he gently cleaned you up, then him self, then threw the cloth on the floor and plopped down beside you on his back, and you snuggled up to him, his arm pulling you closer by your waist.

Damn. Peter has a whole other side of him you need to explore.

"You didn't... you wouldn't..." Peter tried to say, not finding the right words, "no Pete, I wouldn't, only you get to see these parts of me.", you said and he chuckled lightly, kissing your temple and pulling you closer, both of you exhausted, falling asleep almost immediately wrapped in each other's arms.

[the-mykie-show]

After your night with Negan you have to make an important decision, meanwhile your ex struggles to accept that your relationship is over and after he takes things too far Negan comes up with a plan to teach him a lesson once and for all. 

*rating* explicit 

*warnings* rough sex, multiple sex positions, semi public fingering, blow jobs, unprotected sex, dirty talk, kind of stalking. 

In your dazed, half asleep state you almost mistake Negan's arm still wrapped around your waist for your ex's, before memories of last night flood back into your consciousness. You let out a contented sigh, remembering how Negan touched you, the way his tongue felt between your legs, how his cock filled you.

“You awake, darlin’?” he asks, his fingers brush your hair off your neck for him to press a soft kiss under your ear.

“Yeah.” you whisper, rolling over on the plush pillows to face him.

You're both still naked, and you feel the unmistakable ache that only really good sex could leave between your legs.

“You sleep alright?” he asks.

“Like a rock.” you replied.

“Yeah, couple of good orgasms will do that for you” his signature cocky smirk lights up his face.

You smack his shoulder playfully.

“You want to shower before you go?” he asks.

“That would actually be great. You joining?”

“Nah I got some shit to take care of.” Negan shows you to his personal bathroom, it's just as lavish as his bedroom, a large tub sits in one corner, a glass shower stall in the other, with plush black rugs,and matching fluffy towels. You could almost forget the apocalypse even happened in here.

He gives you some shampoo and soap, and leaves you to it.

You notice in the floor length mirror that you have several hickeys on your neck and inner thighs, and a bruise shaped like Negan's fingers on your hip. You don't mind them though.

Once you've showered and wrapped yourself in a towel you leave the bathroom to go find your clothes wherever they were scattered last night. You expect Negan to be long gone, off attending to whatever the Sanctuary needed today, but instead he's waiting for you by the bed. He's already gathered your clothes and put them into a neat pile on end of the bed, next to them however is nice set of lingerie accompanied by a short black dress.

“What's this?” you ask looking between Negan and the dress.

“It's a proposal of sorts. If you want to say no you can, no questions asked, but I was hoping you would be my wife.” you're stunned by him yet again, you thought last night was a one time hookup, you weren't expecting him to ask you to join the six other girls he called his wives, you'd never given if you're opposed to the idea or not any thought. You'd never had reason to having been what you thought was a happy relationship.

“I don't know. Can I think about it?” you ask sheepishly.

“Yeah, of course. Regardless of what you decide, I'd fucking love to have a repeat of last night.” he says, pulling to him and planting a kiss on your lips. It starts to heat up right as someone knocks urgently on his door.

“What the fuck do you want?” he breaks the kiss to shout at the person on the other side of the door.

“We have a problem, sir.” Negan rolls his eyes.

“If you'll excuse me I have some clusterfuck to fix.” he leaves you to make your choice on your own. In the end you decide to keep the back dress but wear your own clothes for now.

You make your way down to the cafeteria for breakfast, loading your plate with your favorites, shooting the grumpy lady in a hairnet who always serves your morning meal a friendly smile which quickly fades once you remember that you no longer have a boyfriend to eat breakfast with.

Your steamy fling with Negan was enough to make you forget all about your lying scumbag of an ex for one night, but now in the cold light of day you're forced to confront the fact that you're alone now.

The little black dress laying upstairs in your room begins to look better and better as you find an empty table and settle in for your morning meal alone. You watch Negan's wives as you eat, they've always intimidated you since you arrived at the Sanctuary, but watching them now they seem nice enough. You watch as a pretty redhead throws a rolled up napkin at a tall dark skinned women sitting across from her and all the girls laughed together.

You're snapped out of your thoughts by an unfortunately familiar voice “Y/N! I've been looking all over for you all night. Where were you?” your ex stands in front of you.

“None of your business.” you snap.

“Come on, don't do this babe. I made a mistake, and I'm so sorry. Can you please give me another chance?” he pleads.

“No. You can go fuck yourself.” you take an angry bite of your breakfast not even bothering to look at him.

“Are those hickeys? Are you already fucking someone else?” he's angry now, he grabs your arm yanking you to face him suddenly.

“Who the fuck is he? You little whore getting with another guy the night you break up with me!” his grip on your arm gets bruising tight on your arm.

“I broke up with you because you cheated on me you stupid prick!” you try to jerk your arm away from him but he won't let you go. You start to get a little scared.

“You're hurting me, let me go.” he does, but you're certain it's only because people are starting to stare.

You feel sick to your stomach, you don't even want your breakfast anymore.

You managed to make it through the rest of the day without another run-in with your ex, you do run into Negan a few times but he doesn't ask if you've made a decision yet, just shoots you a knowing smirk and winks at you on his way by.

That night when you go back to your room you notice a small wicker basket by your door, it's filled with fresh wild flowers, a stuffed animal, and a bottle of wine that someone had to have spent a shit ton of their points on. At first it makes you smile, you think it must be from Negan, an attempt to win you over and get to say yes to being his wife no doubt. Then you see the card attached to the basket and realize it's from your ex.

“I'm so sorry, please forgive me. I need you. I love you.”

You stuff the stupid note back into the basket and shove it aside.

You don't care if he spent all his points on this apology basket, you don't care how much he wants you back, it isn't gonna happen.

The next morning there is yet another basket outside your door, this time with chocolates, a heart shaped necklace, and a bottle of whiskey.

After lunch another one arrives. At this point you start to fear that your ex is turning into a stalker, and people on your hall are starting to notice the heap of gifts outside your door, you hope someone will steal them so that you don't have to deal with them, but Negan has rules against such things that he enforces harshly when necessary so no one dares to.

That night when you returned to your room your door is unlocked. You know you locked it, your heart beats violently with fear, but you open the door anyway, your hand wrapping the knife at your hip.

You recognize the figure standing at the end of your bed seconds before you stab him. It's your ex.

“What are you doing in my room you psycho?!” you yell at him, flipping on the light, still branching your knife. You notice that he's spread rose petals around the room, as if a sappy romantic gesture was enough to win you back.

“I came to prepare a romantic evening for us.” he says, turning around slowly “Instead I found this.” he holds up the black dress Negan gave you.

“So you fucked Negan huh? And he asked you to join his little whore house. Can't say I'm surprised, that is his MO. Just like he did to Dwight. You gonna have him burn my face off too?” he laughs bitterly. “Just at least answer me this. Did you sleep with him when we were together?”

“No of course not. I was loyal to you, even though you cheated on me, lied to me, ignored me, treated me like shit. I was loyal. That night was the first time I've slept with anyone that wasn't you in years. In fact it'd been so long I'd forgotten sex is actually supposed to feel good until Negan.” you know you're playing with fire but you just can't help yourself.

“Come on Y/N you can't possibly mean that. We had good sex, you loved me. It's not too late, we can still get it all back.” he's pleading with you again, desperation in his eyes.

“I don't want it back. I don't want you back.” you say matter of factly.

“Please don't say that Y/N! I love you, I need you back.” you shake your head gesturing to the open door.

“I said no, now take your shit and get out of my room.”

“It's our room. Please just let me make it up to you. I could fuck you so much better than him.”

“No you really can't, not that it would matter if you could because we're over, and tonight I'm saying yes to Negan.” you hadn't even completely made up your mind about Negan's proposal until that moment but you know you're making the right decision.

“No! You can't, you belong to me, you're my girl.”

“I don't belong to anyone, I'm a person you shit head! Not a piece of property. But tonight I will be a married woman and you're going to have to accept that.” his eyes burn bright with anger, and for a moment you fear you're going to have to use your knife, lucky for you your neighbor across the hall, a sweet older lady who works in the gardens, comes home at the right moment.

“Are you okay, dear?” she asks, poking her head into your room. Your ex shoots you a dirty look and throws the black dress at you on his way out with a growl of “This isn't over.”.

“I'm fine, thank you.” you assure your neighbor before closing the door and going to work cleaning up the rose petals all over your room.

It takes forever to get them put into a pile on the floor, and before you can finish you hear a knock on the door. You freeze, you fear its your ex back to harass you more, but then Negan's voice speaks from the other side of the door.

“You in there babygirl?” you open the door, he sees you're wearing the little black dress and grins from ear to ear.

“You're saying yes?” he asks.

“Yes.” you returned his grin and he yanks you into a tight hug and presses his lips against yours in deep kiss. When you both come up for air he sees the mess of petals and gifts spread around your room.

“What's all this shit?” he gestures to the room with a leather clad hand.

“What do you think?” you sigh “my ex wants me back. He's trying very hard.”

“Of fucking course he does, you're a goddamn catch.” he smirks, playfully slapping you on the ass.

“Yeah, well he should have thought about how much he loved me before he did what he did.” you shake your head with disappointment.

“Yeah, he sure as shit should have. Do you want me to talk to him?” Negan offers, picking up the bottle of wine the idiot had left and examining it.

“I think that might make it worse, he thinks I belong to him.” Negan places the bottle down with the rest of the unwanted gifts and pulls you to him, his gloved hand sweeping your hair back to press his lips against your ear.

“Well then, maybe we just need to show that little prick who you really belong to.” he nips your ear lobe and your knees go weak.

Negan explains the rest of his plan, all while letting his hands wander all over your body, gently kneading your breasts, and eventually working your dress up over your ass, feeling you up and admiring the way your ass looks in the lingerie he gave you all the while.

You're unsure about his plan, you worry it will make the situation worse, not to mention it's a little intrusive and awkward, but in the end you decide to trust Negan.

You wait in Negan's office with him while he sends a Savior to find your ex, “you look nervous. Don't be,” he reassures you “it's not like this is anything either of us hasn't seen before.”

“I know, it's just I feel weird about this.” you admit.

“You don't have to do this if you don't want to, we can call it off.” you knew Negan would let you stop this whole thing on a moment's notice with no questions asked, that was a big part of why you trusted him with this. If anyone else had suggested this idea to you, you would have laughed in their face and told them to go fuck themselves. But this was Negan.

“No, let's do it.” you say.

Negan lifts you onto his desk, standing between your legs, he pulls you into a kiss that starts soft but soon turns rough, his tongue slipping into your mouth, the ache between your legs already stirring up again.

His lips move to your neck, “You sure you're good with this? You feel a little tense.”he says against your skin.

“Yeah, I'm just nervous, what he reacts violently?” he keeps kissing your neck, softly sucking in the sensitive spots, and pulls you closer to the edge of the desk.

“Do you realize who you're talking to?” he asks “He wouldn't dare. Now spread your legs for me, baby.” you do as he asks, opening your legs to reveal your bare sex, this plan requiring you to take off the lace panties.

He presses two fingers to your lips, “Get em nice and wet,”

you take them in your mouth and suck on them softly, wetting them so they'll slide inside you easier.

“Damn I can't wait to feel that mouth around my cock.” he groans pulling his fingers from between your lips and sliding them between your thighs, you feel them press against your already wet entrance.

“You ready?” he asks, and you nod. His fingers fill you all at once in one smooth flick of his wrist, your thighs clamping around his hand.

He easily finds your sweet spot and slowly drags the pads of his fingers against it, your body clenching around him. Footsteps approach outside the door and his fingers still inside you, giving you the chance to change your mind. But you shake your head.

“Good girl, let me feel that tight little pussy come.” you can't hold in the moan when the heel of his hand rubs against your clit at the same time his fingers rub something deep inside you.

The Savior Negan had sent to get your ex knocked on his office door, you fidget nervously as Negan orders them to come in, his fingers still buried deep inside you.

You feel your ex’s shocked stare as realizes what Negan is doing to you. Negan holds up his unoccupied hand, signaling him to wait.

“C'mon baby, I know you like it when I fuck you real slow, but I got business to attend to.” his fingers feel so good inside you it isn't even awkward, you hands involuntarily grip his shoulders, moans falling from your lips as he makes you come. Your core tightening around him as you come, a warm wet rush coating his fingers in the evidence of just how good he made you feel.

You lean back on your elbows on his desk, feeling drunk on pleasure despite your ex standing there dumbfounded by what he'd just witnessed.

Negan turns to face him, licking the arousal and come from his fingers.

“Sorry about that, man.” he says with a smirk “gotta keep my girl satisfied, not that you'd probably know anything about pleasuring a woman” he laughed.

“What the hell is this?” your ex says. “I thought you wanted to talk to me?” he's pushing his luck with Negan.

“I sure as shit do. You got any ideas why that might be?”

“Not really, but is guess it has something to do with her?” he looks at you with disdain in his eyes, maybe even disgust.

“Well looks like you're not as big of a dumbass as I thought, because you are right. My wife here tells me you won't accept that she's over your ass and leave her alone.” his eyes dance between you and Negan, looking rather afraid now.  He knows he should be nervous, even if you weren't Negan's newest wife he wouldn't take kindly to a man harassing, borderline stalking a women. He probably thinks Negan has a much more severe punishment in mind, like the iron or the cells, or maybe even the fence.

“It's not like that…” he stammers “it's just… I.. I wanted to apologize and ask for her back. I wasn't gonna hurt her!”

“The thing is you already did apologize and ask for her back. It became concerning after you grabbed her and screamed at her in the cafeteria, and it became creepy after you you broke into her room. I'm not going to ask you to justify your shit ass choices, but I am going to have to insist that you apologize to the lady and swear on your nutsack this shit won't happen again.” Negan explains.

“I did nothing wrong, in fact that little whore should be thankful someone even wants that used up cunt enough to fight for her at all.” his words feel like a slap in the face, how could he say that about you? You thought he cared about you at least a little even after everything he did to hurt you.

Negan's whole demeanor changes, his eyes becoming dark and cold, almost murderous.

“What the fuck did you just say?” he growls, and before you know what's happening your ex is thrown against the wall and Negan's hands are around his throat.

“You don't fucking talk about my woman like that, you hear me you little fucker?” your ex struggles to breath, trying to push Negan off him. Negan doesn't budge until his face turns blue, finally letting him go and throwing him to the floor.

“Okay, okay, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for everything Y/N! ”

“And?” Negan growls.

“And it won't happen again, I'll leave you alone.” he looks almost in tears.

“Good, now get your ass out of my sight.” he scrambles to his feet and hurries from Negan's office.

“You okay babygirl?” he asks once the office door slams behind your ex.

“Yeah, I just feel like an idiot.” you stare down at your feet in shame.

“You're not an idiot, baby.” he wraps his arms around you. “and you aren't a whore either. You can't let that shit get to you, he's just an asshole who didn't see what a beautiful, smart amazing woman he had, not to mention hot as fuck and awesome in bed.”

You smile a little at his words. “I'm pretty sure you don't hear this often enough, but you're a good guy, Negan.” you pull him down into a kiss, which he gladly reciprocates. “now why don't we finish what you started?”

“That's my dirty girl,” he smirks. “How about you get down on your knees for me?”

You gladly drop to your knees, reaching up to open his pants and pulling them down his legs with his boxers all at once, his manhood already hard. Staring up at him with the most innocent, doe eyed expression you can muster, you grip him by the hilt, you pop his tip in your mouth, sucking on it and curling your tongue around it, maintaining eye contact the whole time.

“Damn baby!” he groans. You can already taste his precome, so you tongue his slit making his hips involuntarily twitch and slide his cock against the back of your throat. You gag a little, not expecting the sudden thrust.

“Sorry sweetheart, I just couldn't help myself. You don't gotta deep throat me if you don't want to, this feels fucking amazing on its own.” you respond by slowly swallowing him all the way until you feel his tip at the back of your throat, you somehow managed to swallow him almost all the way to his balls, not leaving much of his shaft for you to stroke so instead you cup his balls kneading them while you suck. You feel his cock twitch in your mouth, and he lets out a deep moan.

Slowly pulling off, you suck his tip a little harder this time and then swallow him “Shit baby,” he groans “keep sucking my cock like that and you're gonna be my fuckin’ favorite in no time.” his hand twists in your hair, pulling gently as you bob your head up and down on his shaft. “Oh fuck yeah, just like that.” you feel his balls tense in your hand before he even warns you that he's going to come. You heed his warning by sucking his tip while he comes with a load groan. You swallow as much as you can before letting his half soft member slip from between your lips.

“That's my good girl.” his hand strokes your hair “Now that I've made that pretty little mouth mine, why don't you go bend over my desk and let me take you from behind?”

You stand up, and bend over his desk like he asked, he comes up behind you, his hand pressing your top half down while the other pushes your dress over the curve of your ass exposing you to him.

“You loved coming on my fingers in front of that prick didn't you?” his hand dipped between your legs.

“Yes.” you moan, admitting the truth that you'd gotten off on Negan pleasuring you in front of your ex, showing him how a real man gave a woman pleasure.

His fingers find your core, easily sliding inside you.

“Oh darlin’ you're fucking soaked. Did sucking me off get you this wet?” you nod.

He's already hard again and lining himself up with your entrance, his tip pressing into you.

“Ready babygirl?” he asks.

“Yes.” you moan. Your voice is so full of lust you barely recognize it as your own.

He enters you with one hard but smooth thrust, your body spasming around him as he lets you adjust to his size. At this angle it's even more obvious that he's a lot bigger than you're used to, once you're adjusted to the feeling of being filled so deeply you push your ass against his hips, pressing his cock deeper inside you.

Once he knows you're ready you feel him withdraw slightly and snap his hips forward with enough force to shake the desk, the angle is perfect, each thrust hitting that little spot that made your eyes roll back in your head.

“You like that baby? You like my cock filling you up?” he thrusts roughly again. You'd never liked rough sex before Negan, but now it felt amazing, you figure maybe you'd just never had it done right before Negan.

“Harder.” you found yourself moaning the command after a few more rough thrusts, even Negan seems surprised by it, but he does it anyway. The force of his thrusts rattle the whole desk, knocking a lamp over and sending some books crashing to the floor.

You feel your core tightening with your building orgasm, each thrust increasing the intensity, and making your walls squeeze him.

“Damn you're so fucking tight.” he groaned.

“You gonna come for me��� again.” you can practically feel the smirk in his voice, and I want to say something snide back, but then his hand reaches around, his fingers finding you clit. He teases the sensitive bundle of nerves with a maddeningly light touch, the complete opposite of his rough, hard thrusts.

You feel your walls start to flutter and throb around him, your orgasm finally over taking you, he drags your pleasure out with slow but hard and deep thrusts, his fingers still working your over stimulated clit, while your toes curl in your shoes and your hands hang onto the edge of the desk for dear life.

Your core is still spasming with aftershocks of your orgasm when Negan finds his release, his body going rigid behind you as you feel him spill inside you. He keeps thrusting as hard as he can until he's spent himself completely and his cock starts to soften.

In one dizzying movement he pulls out and turns you around to face him.

“Fuck, I am a lucky man! I'm glad you said yes, babygirl.” he kisses you, this time it's soft and lazy. And you've never felt more content than you do in his arms, that somehow still pleasurable freshly fucked ache deep inside you and his come on your thighs.

[leoninapelliolovesconchitawurst]

ENGLISH TRANSLATION (by me)

WATSON.DE 22/10/19

https://www.watson.de/unterhaltung/interview/421417472-conchita-wurst-tom-neuwirth-rechnet-mit-esc-conchita-ab-hatte-keinen-spass?utm_source=main

Conchita Wurst gets rid of ESC-art figure: "I was unhappy"

Five years ago, Austrian Tom Neuwirth won the Eurovision Song Contest as Conchita Wurst. But the role of the eccentric diva with beard and wig did not fill him in the long run. Now he returns as a new art figure "Wurst" - with electric and brand new, male appearance. With ‘Watson’ he spoke about rebellion, crisis of meaning, thinking in drawers and finding and seeking personal freedom.

Watson: Tom, we know you as a conchita with a wavy wig and a floor-length dress. Why did you choose to show the public a "Wurst" page that we did not know before?

Conchita Wurst: I felt the need to evolve. Before that I moved too long in the same world for my circumstances. And by that I mean that I locked myself into a set of rules that reduced me to a color of my being. And I call this color the "President's wife".

President's wife?

A president's wife has a certain protocol and can not do many things. And through this years-long reduction of myself, I became unhappy. I understood that I need a challenge, something new. For years I was in the songwriting camp and I thank my record company that I was able to find out to be completely talent free in songwriting (laughs). And then I thought: why don’t I just do the music that I hear privately? And I love electronic music, I love Robyn and Björk. I have found a great team for the new album that understands me, my story and my vision. And although I did not write or compose the songs myself, it has become so much more authentic than much of what I've done before. Or closer to my life.

Did you have any concerns about taking a new path or did you care less about the opinions of others?

When it suddenly became clear what the details should look like, how each mosaic fits into the other, I no longer had the feeling that I had to think about it. I was really very egocentric (laughs). Of course, I'm happy about everyone who likes my music. But I understand that I just have to do more things for myself. Because it's my life - and that's so beautiful. And my manager always says: Only then is it better than perfect. So I'll just do it and throw one dart at a time. We will see which one gets stuck.

Is there a song that has a lot of heart and soul?

I can not commit myself to one. Many songs deal with a specific time in my life. I deliberately refrained from explaining the meaning of each in detail. For the people who hear the music, I do not want to force a picture on them. It's like having read a book and then watching the movie. Then your own world is suddenly gone. That's why I hold myself back and do not say that's what it's about and the other's about that. Because once the child is born, it's not just me anymore and I accept that. But let's put it this way: Every song is intense.

What is the basic message of your songs, like the very striking "hit me"? Do not let anyone restrict you?

Absolutely. Nobody has the right to decide about your life. And that's the point. And yes, many messages are similar to those that were important to me five years ago. By now it may have become a bit more concrete and I am spreading it with more self-confidence.

Were you uncertain in places?

Everyone doubts. But I've stopped apologizing, in public and with my friends. With one caveat: I would apologize if I make mistakes, absolutely. And I do that too. But this album and this whole process has brought me so much closer to myself.

"I was in a situation where I realized I'm not feeling well anymore, I'm not enjoying what I'm doing."

And there is only one way out.

Which one did you choose?

I've worked hard with myself, started therapy, talked to my family and friends, and worked things that were years back and were never properly pronounced. And of course you do not just hear nice things.

And then to take that, to apologize, try to do better, but also to accept that you can not do everything well - that was very liberating.

In what way?

I always try my best - but in some ways I'm just a bit too brisk. And sometimes I'm just a bit too nice. And to realize that as a whole, has given me a whole new sense of security. Because I suddenly knew better where my range of motion lies - what am I sure of and what is not. And knowing that means incredible freedom and that helped me to be more confident. Not only in terms of the music, but also my appearance.

"I stopped wearing wigs, some said it was just marketing, so I just say, F ... you all, I'm still me."

And even if the name changes - at the end of the day it's always wurst (not important). Whether I am more feminine or masculine now, always this kind of thinking - I've stopped thinking about it.

An easy process?

Not at all. Because when I finished the album and it went to the videos, I have even operated drawer thinking. I was so anxious to be masculine. Now I think: There are no rules anymore.

What has changed since your first album five years ago - and what has remained the same?

Of course, the sound has changed and also that I am now much more personal stories in my songs. The fire remained the same. Or let's put it this way: the fire has come back.

Was the flame extinguished?

I knew as a child: I'm a star. I did not care if anyone wants to hear that. And then I lost this self-evidence, I was uncertain for a long time. Now I know again: I am a star. But that's the only thing I can do (laughs). So I focus on it. And to have such a clear positioning and to say: I love myself incredibly, I think I'm gorgeous, I'm funny, I'm talented - to be able to say, but at the same time to say - you are incredibly beautiful and it is so inspiring to listen to you. There is room for everything and everyone. I had to learn that first. This has nothing to do with arrogance, if you think yourself great. I find myself incredibly great - but I also find others incredibly great!

Did you arrive at the end of your journey to self-fulfillment?

No, that's not over yet. There are enough situations in which I manipulate myself and discover: I'm not myself, I'm not relaxed. But jealous, angry, impatient.

Are you pondering a lot?

No, but hello! I think I've improved, just living for the moment. Just after the song contest things came one after the other. And now just sitting here to tell you about me, I can enjoy that. I do not do anything better than talk about myself (laughs). But now I'm anchored here right now and have no stress at all. I could not have done that a few years ago.

What about your plans to film your autobiography?

Of course they are still standing. I also really want to do a musical. I mean, my story: The little boy from the mountains goes to the song contest with a wig - that's a story (laughs)! But the near future also brings a lot of great things. For example, I'm really looking forward to my performance on 2 November at "WUK" in Vienna. Only the cool kids are playing and I'm so happy to be allowed to perform with my band. I'm very curious what people say about "Wurst". And of course I am happy to go on tour again, also in Germany. And if all goes well, I'm still traveling a bit in Europe, that could be very exciting. And then comes a small TV show. So I have a lot to do.

Speaking of which, "Queen of Drag" will start on ProSieben on November 14th. Why did you want to be there?

These kind of requests came very early in my career. But the parameters never were for me. But in that case I could not refuse. I mean, Germany's biggest private station, Prime-Time, 8:15 pm. And the format will both entertain and touch. And I have never seen this range of entertainment, talent, humanity. We laughed and cried while filming. We had such a great time. And of course, I hope that's what the audience sees. And even if not - that was such a beautiful experience for me, nobody can take that from me.

What wishes do you have for you this year as Conchita, Wurst and Tom?

I wish I had at least as much fun as last year. I wish that I spend enough time with my family and friends and also have enough time with me. I want to be challenged and creative and just keep going like before. That would be great. No such bold wishes, or (laughs)?

Conchita or Tom? Wurst!

New album "Truth over Magnitude"

Tom Neuwirth released his debut album "Conchita" in 2015, which took first place in the Austrian album charts and was awarded Platinum. Also his second studio album "From Vienna With Love" achieved gold status in the release week. On October 25, the 30-year-old will be releasing an electric album for the first time with "Truth over Magnitude". From the 14th of November he will be looking for the "Queen of Drags" again as Conchita Wurst, alongside Heidi Klum and Bill Kaulitz on ProSieben.

[leoninapelliolovesconchitawurst]

ENGLISH TRANSLATION (by me)

WATSON.DE 22/10/19

https://www.watson.de/unterhaltung/interview/421417472-conchita-wurst-tom-neuwirth-rechnet-mit-esc-conchita-ab-hatte-keinen-spass?utm_source=main

Conchita Wurst gets rid of ESC-art figure: "I was unhappy"

Five years ago, Austrian Tom Neuwirth won the Eurovision Song Contest as Conchita Wurst. But the role of the eccentric diva with beard and wig did not fill him in the long run. Now he returns as a new art figure "Wurst" - with electric and brand new, male appearance. With ‘Watson’ he spoke about rebellion, crisis of meaning, thinking in drawers and finding and seeking personal freedom.

Watson: Tom, we know you as a conchita with a wavy wig and a floor-length dress. Why did you choose to show the public a "Wurst" page that we did not know before?

Conchita Wurst: I felt the need to evolve. Before that I moved too long in the same world for my circumstances. And by that I mean that I locked myself into a set of rules that reduced me to a color of my being. And I call this color the "President's wife".

President's wife?

A president's wife has a certain protocol and can not do many things. And through this years-long reduction of myself, I became unhappy. I understood that I need a challenge, something new. For years I was in the songwriting camp and I thank my record company that I was able to find out to be completely talent free in songwriting (laughs). And then I thought: why don’t I just do the music that I hear privately? And I love electronic music, I love Robyn and Björk. I have found a great team for the new album that understands me, my story and my vision. And although I did not write or compose the songs myself, it has become so much more authentic than much of what I've done before. Or closer to my life.

Did you have any concerns about taking a new path or did you care less about the opinions of others?

When it suddenly became clear what the details should look like, how each mosaic fits into the other, I no longer had the feeling that I had to think about it. I was really very egocentric (laughs). Of course, I'm happy about everyone who likes my music. But I understand that I just have to do more things for myself. Because it's my life - and that's so beautiful. And my manager always says: Only then is it better than perfect. So I'll just do it and throw one dart at a time. We will see which one gets stuck.

Is there a song that has a lot of heart and soul?

I can not commit myself to one. Many songs deal with a specific time in my life. I deliberately refrained from explaining the meaning of each in detail. For the people who hear the music, I do not want to force a picture on them. It's like having read a book and then watching the movie. Then your own world is suddenly gone. That's why I hold myself back and do not say that's what it's about and the other's about that. Because once the child is born, it's not just me anymore and I accept that. But let's put it this way: Every song is intense.

What is the basic message of your songs, like the very striking "hit me"? Do not let anyone restrict you?

Absolutely. Nobody has the right to decide about your life. And that's the point. And yes, many messages are similar to those that were important to me five years ago. By now it may have become a bit more concrete and I am spreading it with more self-confidence.

Were you uncertain in places?

Everyone doubts. But I've stopped apologizing, in public and with my friends. With one caveat: I would apologize if I make mistakes, absolutely. And I do that too. But this album and this whole process has brought me so much closer to myself.

"I was in a situation where I realized I'm not feeling well anymore, I'm not enjoying what I'm doing."

And there is only one way out.

Which one did you choose?

I've worked hard with myself, started therapy, talked to my family and friends, and worked things that were years back and were never properly pronounced. And of course you do not just hear nice things.

And then to take that, to apologize, try to do better, but also to accept that you can not do everything well - that was very liberating.

In what way?

I always try my best - but in some ways I'm just a bit too brisk. And sometimes I'm just a bit too nice. And to realize that as a whole, has given me a whole new sense of security. Because I suddenly knew better where my range of motion lies - what am I sure of and what is not. And knowing that means incredible freedom and that helped me to be more confident. Not only in terms of the music, but also my appearance.

"I stopped wearing wigs, some said it was just marketing, so I just say, F ... you all, I'm still me."

And even if the name changes - at the end of the day it's always wurst (not important). Whether I am more feminine or masculine now, always this kind of thinking - I've stopped thinking about it.

An easy process?

Not at all. Because when I finished the album and it went to the videos, I have even operated drawer thinking. I was so anxious to be masculine. Now I think: There are no rules anymore.What has changed since your first album five years ago - and what has remained the same?

Of course, the sound has changed and also that I am now much more personal stories in my songs. The fire remained the same. Or let's put it this way: the fire has come back.

Was the flame extinguished?

I knew as a child: I'm a star. I did not care if anyone wants to hear that. And then I lost this self-evidence, I was uncertain for a long time. Now I know again: I am a star. But that's the only thing I can do (laughs). So I focus on it. And to have such a clear positioning and to say: I love myself incredibly, I think I'm gorgeous, I'm funny, I'm talented - to be able to say, but at the same time to say - you are incredibly beautiful and it is so inspiring to listen to you. There is room for everything and everyone. I had to learn that first. This has nothing to do with arrogance, if you think yourself great. I find myself incredibly great - but I also find others incredibly great!

Did you arrive at the end of your journey to self-fulfillment?

No, that's not over yet. There are enough situations in which I manipulate myself and discover: I'm not myself, I'm not relaxed. But jealous, angry, impatient.

Are you pondering a lot?

No, but hello! I think I've improved, just living for the moment. Just after the song contest things came one after the other. And now just sitting here to tell you about me, I can enjoy that. I do not do anything better than talk about myself (laughs). But now I'm anchored here right now and have no stress at all. I could not have done that a few years ago.

What about your plans to film your autobiography?

Of course they are still standing. I also really want to do a musical. I mean, my story: The little boy from the mountains goes to the song contest with a wig - that's a story (laughs)! But the near future also brings a lot of great things. For example, I'm really looking forward to my performance on 2 November at "WUK" in Vienna. Only the cool kids are playing and I'm so happy to be allowed to perform with my band. I'm very curious what people say about "Wurst". And of course I am happy to go on tour again, also in Germany. And if all goes well, I'm still traveling a bit in Europe, that could be very exciting. And then comes a small TV show. So I have a lot to do.

Speaking of which, "Queen of Drag" will start on ProSieben on November 14th. Why did you want to be there?

These kind of requests came very early in my career. But the parameters never were for me. But in that case I could not refuse. I mean, Germany's biggest private station, Prime-Time, 8:15 pm. And the format will both entertain and touch. And I have never seen this range of entertainment, talent, humanity. We laughed and cried while filming. We had such a great time. And of course, I hope that's what the audience sees. And even if not - that was such a beautiful experience for me, nobody can take that from me.

What wishes do you have for you this year as Conchita, Wurst and Tom?

I wish I had at least as much fun as last year. I wish that I spend enough time with my family and friends and also have enough time with me. I want to be challenged and creative and just keep going like before. That would be great. No such bold wishes, or (laughs)?

Conchita or Tom? Wurst!

New album "Truth over Magnitude"

Tom Neuwirth released his debut album "Conchita" in 2015, which took first place in the Austrian album charts and was awarded Platinum. Also his second studio album "From Vienna With Love" achieved gold status in the release week. On October 25, the 30-year-old will be releasing an electric album for the first time with "Truth over Magnitude". From the 14th of November he will be looking for the "Queen of Drags" again as Conchita Wurst, alongside Heidi Klum and Bill Kaulitz on ProSieben.