#I've had bouts of spending in the past

[thoughtvoid]

I spent so much money during the holiday season (half on myself, half on family), but. While I am slightly ashamed (being unemployed most of the year, and spending pretty much everything I was getting while working holiday immediately), my satisfaction with what I've been getting feels pretty good.

Like. I had a small bit of reasoning in that I was only guaranteed to be working holiday, so I wanted to heavily use my worker's discount (retail) while also taking advantage of good holiday sales. Got a healthy mix of 'things I will need in the future/improve my quality of life immediately' and 'I don't need this but I like it so now it's mine'. I will probably lose most of my shame of spending money in a month or so, when cards are paid off and I start actually accumulating money again, since I was kept on after holiday. I'd like to be able to stop looking at my balance and worrying about maintaining a certain amount and just vibe again.

[lvlyghost]

Hello do you take requests cause I had this idea in my mind but I suck in writing

how bout a ghost x reader where he had a bad day and takes it out on his beloved reader who he's been in a really long relationship with, by starting an argument and maybe saying some really mean and bad things that break the reader. Like the reader is only a shell of herself and completely ruined by ghosts words and just crying or sitting completely still staring off the wall or just staring at nothing just being numb.

What would be interesting is Simons reaction when he realizes the damage that he's done, maybe he would cry/break down idk when he sees the usually happy reader being so dull and almost lifeless yk

But Pleasee don't do this to our hearts and write some comfort and a happy ending please I couldn't handle too much angst❤️😭

The Weight of the World

PAIRINGS: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x F!Reader

SUMMARY: You promised to always lean on each other but sometimes love isn't enough.

WORD COUNT: 1.5k

TW: heavy angst, literally got some mid anxiety writing this🥴 swearing, self-doubt, hurt-comfort and slight fluff towards the end. lmk if i missed any.

A/N: finished this in one sitting lol, also not proofread and poorly edited, i've been having a shitty week so expect more angst lol. meet me in therapy. Enjoy anon!🤍🌟🫶🏻💕

Masterlist✨

You hesitate right outside Simon's studio, the place where he secludes himself from everything and everyone. Ever since he came from his last mission he seemed to be on the edge constantly. The usual softness that he reserved specifically for you was... absent.

Still you wouldn't let that stop you from approaching; having dating him for a few years now let you know so much of that. You knew when he was hurting. When he was sad, angry, jealous or even happy. Little to no people could say that.

Somehow this was different. He wasn't even letting you in, constantly keeping you at arms length and that hurt. How were you supposed to get to him this time? Get him to talk to you?

To look at you again with that same glint in his eyes, the spark that you ignited in him and that won't fade away even years after.

The sound of a chair creaking startles you, the same time the timer in the kitchen goes off. You walk back, turning the oven off, and sticking out the apple pie you so happily baked for both with hopes that you'll get him loosen a bit that dark cloud that's been looming over Simon these past few days.

The door of his studio is yanked open the heavy stomp of his boots resonating across the small apartment you two share, then his bulky frame appears just to grab the keys to his black motorcycle.

"Simon!" You call him, burning your hand in the process. He stills halfway through the living room, waiting for you to say something else. Wetting a cloth hurriedly and wrapping it around the burnt skin.

"I made something for us... maybe," standing behind him you leave a reasonable space between the two. You swallow down hard. "Thought we could have it together and just, you know spend...-"

"I don't have time for that now." His voice is cold and monotone. "Don't wait for me."

"But Si-" he turns on his heels, eyes hard and unyielding. He approaches slowly, making you gulp. "What's gotten into you, Simon?" You fight back the tears, this was the man you loved so dearly, the man you knew loved you back; there was a reason for the golden engagement ring on your left hand. "I..-"

"Fucking hell would you stop that? Please just..." he notices the wetness in your eyes. "I can't do this. Not anymore."

"Whatever it is I promise we can work it out together!" your lips quivered. "Just talk to me!"

"I don't need to talk about anything girl!" He seethes, one finger pointing at you. "Think some cheap counseling with you will make things right? Bloody hell no. Neither some homemade bread, this isn't fucking working and it won't until you learn how the bloody world works."

It breaks your heart into a tiny million pieces, breathing becomes a challenge and the injury in your hand can no longer be felt. Simon's words were worse than any physical pain. Where was the man you loved? The man who used to lift you up and kiss you on the forehead? The man whose hands couldn't stop roaming your body late at night? The man who'd helped you reach out for things he probably put away in the highest shelf so you'd ask for help. That same man that had proposed to you no long ago, right before he was deployed to a special op God knows where. The fabric of his mask moves when he keeps talking but you don't listen. You can't. Just like you can't stop the tears dribbling down your cheeks and the tremble of your hands. Simon's jaw clenched, brows furrowed as he takes a step back and leaves.

You walk sluggishly to where the dessert awaits. It's when your knees buckle that you finally let out a loud cry.

-

Simon knows he isn't a good man. He's done quite questionable things that he could never say out loud. He knows he's fucked in so many ways. But he also knows that there's one thing that kept him from spiraling further down into an abyss of death and self-loathing.

You.

The woman he decided he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. The girl that didn't care about his past, the bad moments and his complicated persona. You who would selflessly love him without asking for something in return. What had you seen in him in first place? Even now after three years he can't wrap his head around the fact that he has someone who waits for him.

Simon knows how much he loves you, but what he doesn't know is how—or in what earth—he deserves every part of you.

You've been avoiding him ever since that horrible night. Words he can't take back. Looks that haunt him every time he closed his eyes. He hears you cry when you go to sleep or when you're taking a shower. Muffled sobs and wails that will come for him until the day he dies.

You avoid him like a plague, when he walks in. After all he's the one to blame. He wanted to ask you to tear him apart maybe that'd feel less painful.

The last remaining of sanity that was left in him came crashing down when he began to notice how you stared off in a haze, numbly looking at the window. He was losing you. Destroyed the one good thing he had. So, a few days later, despite his own demons. Despite the things that broke him all irreparably during the last mission in Moscow, he comes to find you. Sucking in a sharp breath as his eyes set on your left hand.

The engagement ring was gone, forgotten someplace unknown. Simon felt the panic wrenching his guts.

It's all on him.

He whispers your name, calls you softly. Slowly sitting in front of you, the coffee table creaks under his weight. Words get caught in his throat.

"May I take your hand?" He pleads, not getting an answer. Simon sighs, lowering his head as silent reigns yet again. "I don't deserve you." He murmurs, eyes bored into the floor. "I... I ruin everything I touch. Just never thought I'd ruin my girl."

Your eyes flutter shut, wet tears clinging to your eyelashes. Simon watches as you stand and leave without a word, he follows close behind to your shared room.

"Love..."

"Don't call me that!" the hurt in your voice... the resentment in your eyes, he's earned it.

Simon reaches out for your arm, grabbing you firmly but gently, mindful not to harm you.

"Right I deserve that." If there's one thing Simon regrets it's being the reason that your eyes no longer shine. "What I said... what happened I...-"

Shaking your head and biting down your lip.

"You never gave me the chance, I thought we said we'd always find a way."

"I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry baby." in an instant he's pulling you close, although you want to push him away, scream at him, slap him for the calvary he made you go through. "I'm not good with words, and I'm no good person." You feel his body shaking with anxiety as your eyes widen in shock. "I tried... I can't forgive myself for my mistakes."

"Simon..." he hushed you, cradling your head with his big hand. "I can't sleep knowing I can't protect you from what's out there, couldn't bloody protect that kid in Moscow, or my family."

You guide him to the bed, sitting down side by side and holding onto each other.

"Said I would always be with you Simon, why the hell did you push me away?! Have I not given my everything to you? We promised to always make it work!" He grabs your face staring intently into your eyes. "What happened there?"

He blinks, deciding how much to say. There was no need for you to know the entirety of it. He wanted to shield you from the horrors of this world, and he would as long as he lived.

"A young lad whose life's was cut short because I wasn't there on time. How can I come back to you, be happy when someone else just lost their kid..."

"That wasn't on you! Simon Riley you stop that now." He inhales, cinnamon and vanilla flooding his senses. It's you all of you. "Stop carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. We do that together, yeah?" Your chest hurts from how hard it's beating. "You've done far so much. You won't lose me."

A rumble in the sky and cars passing by outside your home is all you hear. Brown eyes like honey stare back into your soul.

"You took it off..."

"I burnt my hand, it wasn't healing properly. And you know what?" He quirks a brow. "It wasn't homemade bread. It was an apple pie, you silly."

"You'll never forgive me for that one won't you?" He doesn't chuckle but the air feels lighter.

"No. Probably won't." Simon takes your burnt hand bringing it to his lips, they're soft against the marred skin.

"But we're still getting married, yeah?" He asks.

You smile fondly, humming when he kisses your forehead, tears have now dried.

"Yeah. We're still getting married."

[lambtotheslaughterr]

Something Wicked This Way Comes

A Rafe Cameron Oneshot

[THIS STORY WILL CONTAIN THEMES OF NON-CON/DUB-CON, MENTAL-EMOTIONAL-PHYSICAL ABUSE, ETC. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. 18+. MINORS DO NOT INTERACT]

WC: 13.3k

Dividers provided by @firefly-graphics

OONA'S MASTERLIST

request for @namelesslosers

requests are currently CLOSED

all AI images are created from prompts i wrote. they are not real images.

Summary: Five years after escaping the cluthes of her violent ex, reader is preparing to spend Halloween night alongside her son, but she wakes that morning feeling something amiss...

it's Halloween, after all, & things are bound to give her a fright, even if it is her past catching up for a bite.

READERS, PREPARE YOURSELVES. I GIVE YOU...THE DARKEST FIC I'VE EVER WRITTEN.

            It was like any other day. Except it wasn’t. From the moment you woke up, something was off. You couldn’t put your finger on it, but there was a tense sensation in the air around you. It left you feeling on edge all day, but you had summed it up to be your paranoia & anxiety kicking in because it was Halloween night. After all, it was a night of spooky scares.

            What didn’t help relieve your unsettled nerves, was the fact that you had woken up late. It was a little past 7:30 in the morning when you finally rolled over to see the time. The red lights flashing at you on your alarm clock shocked you awake, causing you to stumble out of bed.

            “Shit!” You hissed as you raced to your closet to pull out your outfit for the day.

            “Louie!” You yelled from your bedroom, listening for any sign of your son being awake. When you didn’t get a response you tripped into the hallway as you struggled to throw your dress on over your head. You were relieved you showered before bed, otherwise you would have dreaded going to work without one.

            “Lou?!” You hollered again as you stumbled into his bedroom.

            His bed was empty & unmade. You cursed again, knowing exactly where you’d find him next. Leaving his room, you succeeded in getting your dress on & tying the bow in the back before entering the living room. As expected, your son was on his stomach, his bent arms holding his head up as he watched cartoons. You spotted the bag of opened candy on the floor before him.

            “Lou…” You sped-walk towards him as he kicked his feet.

            He smiled up at you, that sweet innocent smile of his you loved so much.

            “You overslept again, Mommy.” He pointed out.

            You feigned surprise, “You don’t say. Maybe someone should have woken me up."

            Bending at the waist, you picked your son up, cradling him on your hip as you searched for the remote to shut off the TV. Lou rested his on your shoulder, his fingers tangling into your hair as he rubbed the strands between his fingers.

            “You were crying in your sleep again last night.” Lou revealed, making your heart stop. “I didn’t want to wake you up since you weren’t crying anymore.”

            “Oh, hon.” You paused in the hallway to placed him on the ground, kneeling down to be eye-level with him, “I’m sorry you had to hear that again.”

            Ever since you left your hometown, or rather ran away from there, you had the same nightmare. In the beginning they happened every single night, but now, almost six years later, they were few & far between. But it was Louie who suffered the most from them. You didn’t realize you were still having him until he was older & started talking. You remembered when he lied next to you in bed one morning, asking why you cried in your sleep. You never had any memories of the nightmares. But Louie remembered them for you.

            “Was the bad man in your dream trying to hurt you again?” Lou bit his lip, a small bout of fear appearing in his eyes.

            You tugged him into you, holding him tight against your chest as you hugged him, “All that matters is that it was just a dream.”

            Lou wrapped his tiny arms over your shoulders, his hands never leaving your hair. That had been a comfort mechanism of his ever since he was an infant.

            “I wish he would visit my dreams.” Lou shared softly, to which you gently pulled him away from you to stare at him bewildered.

            “Baby, why would you want that?”

            He lowered his eyes, “So you could sleep.”

            Releasing a saddened sigh, you ran your fingers through his hair, “Mommy is fine, okay? You keep dreaming your excellent, beautiful dreams. One of us has to, right?”

            Lou nodded at that but he wasn’t smiling.

            Wanting to lighten the mood, you gathered his hands in yours, “I tell you what, you hurry up & go get dressed while Mommy finishes getting ready & we’ll take the long way to school so you can see the kitties, yeah?”

            Louie beamed at that, “Really?!”

            “Yes, really.” You kissed his forehead before standing up, “Now, hurry! We’re late as it is.”

            Lou took off for his bedroom, cheers of joy left in his wake. You smiled after him before re-entering your bedroom. You closed the door behind you, resting against it momentarily as an old memory flashed before you.

            You couldn’t breathe, one of his hands wrapped securely around your throat as he fucked himself into you. His pleased groans filled your ears, forcing more tears from your eyes. A chilled shiver shot up your spin when you felt his lips kiss the tops of your breasts where his teeth marks remained. The weight of his body crushed against yours & you had never felt more trapped.

            “Mom!” Lou yelled from down the hallway, making you jump, “Can I wear my costume to school?!”

            “Yes, baby!” You hollered back, hearing the unevenness in your voice. Shaking away the awful sensations of that memory, you finished getting ready for work.

            Lou skipped ahead of you as you walked down the main street of your small town. You had moved here shortly after Louie was born, wanting him to live in a family town that had a good school system. More importantly, it was a close-knit community. Almost everyone knew everyone. That worked in your favor & made you feel safe. It meant that if anyone new ever moved to town you would know about it. Your neighbors were your last line of defense against the man you escaped from over five years ago.

            “Look, Mommy, look!” Lou paused in front of the display window the cat adoption café. He had his face pressed against the glass, his ghoul makeup smearing as he did so. You laughed to yourself, knowing you would just have to re-do his makeup again before going into class with all the other ghosts & witches.

            “Wow.” You mused along with your son as he meowed at the cats chasing his finger on the other side of the glass. Lou had been asking for a cat for his birthday ever since he was three years old. Whenever he saw one on the street or in a neighbor’s window, he would race towards it at lay on the ground with it as the feline in question would rub along his face & body, making him as one of their own.

            But you always had to say no. A cat, or pet of any kind, would slow you down in the event you had to run again. There had never been a peep or warning from your few trusted friends back home, but you couldn’t risk it. You couldn’t live with yourself if you had to escape from your home with Lou at a moment’s notice, him crying over your shoulder as he begged for you to get his pet.

            And that made you furious. That you couldn’t give your son something he truly wanted & loved because you had to be ready for when your past caught up to you.

            As Lou continued aweing at the kittens behind the glass, you raised your head to peer inside the café. The elderly woman that was always there waved at you through the glass & you waved back. But as you did, you spotted another in the glass. Only they weren’t on the other side, but in the reflection. And they looked a lot like…

            A panicked gasp escaped you as you spun around, staring wide-eyed across the street. But no one was there. Your heart was racing as you looked down the street every which way. But all you saw were other townspeople going about their Friday morning.

            It’s in your head, _____. You calmed yourself. He’s not here. It wasn’t him. It’s just your paranoia.       

            Inhaling sharply, you stole Lou’s attention, grabbing his wrist softly, “C’mon, honey, we gotta go.”

            Louie allowed you to drag him away from the kitty café, his arm outstretched in longing.

            You saw Lou off to his kindergarten classroom before speed-walking down the hallway to the main office. It was a massive relief to you that you managed to land a job in an administrative position at Lou’s school before he even started. Before that you were waitressing while taking online classes at the local community college, & once you got your degree in business administration, you scored a front office desk job at the only elementary school in town. All you needed was to be close to Lou because you never knew when you’d have to snatch him & run.

            “Hey, Miriam.” You greeted breathlessly as you raced into the office, tossing your purse on the floor under your desk.

            “Hey, you.” She eyed you mischievously.

            Miriam was well beyond her retirement period, but Principle Bentley couldn’t get rid of her if he tried. And tried he had. But it was all in good fun. Miriam was a staple of the school & the town itself. She was known as a hard ass but also a gossip queen. She always had all the tea o what was happening in the sleepy Northeastern town. It made your mostly mundane days more enjoyable.

            “Overslept again, I see.”

            “Yeah.” You sighed as you turned your computer on, “Don’t know what’s going on lately.”

            “Something’s in the air.” She commented, echoing your silent thoughts from earlier that morning. “You should relax, though, hon. You’re always wound so tight.”

            You raised your brows in agreement as you pulled up your morning duties, “Easier said than done.”

            Miriam chuckled at that. The door behind your respective desks opened & Principle Bentley stepped out.

            “Morning, ladies.” He greeted as he approached the coffee maker in the corner of the office.

            “Morning, Nicholas.” Miriam didn’t care for referring to him by his career name, after all, she did babysit him when he was only a child.

            “Morning, Principle Bentley.” You greeted him, to which he smirked sweetly.

            “How many times do I gotta tell you, _____, call me Nick.”

            Principle Bentley was young for his job. Thirty one, to be exact, & he was a well-known bachelor in the community. He was easy on the eyes, with dark brown eyes reminiscent of a puppy, & dimples that only added to his boyish charm. But he was your boss. And despite his mild flirtatious advances, you only treated him as such.

            If you couldn’t indulge your son by getting him a cat, you sure as shit couldn’t indulge yourself with a romantic partner. It was out of the question. Perhaps one day, when Louie was older & out of the house, but until then, you kept your mind distraction free.

            “And how many times do I have to tell you, you’re my boss.” You reminded him back, though your tone was friendly.

            Principle Bentley chuckled at that before pouring himself a mug of coffee, “What’s on the agenda for today?”

            You glanced back at your computer, knowing Miriam really only showed up to get paid & gabber with the mom’s & dad’s that came in to pick up their children.

            “There’s an assembly just before lunch, the usual ‘stay safe out there on Halloween night’ spiel followed by some games the teachers put together. And then during final hour the kids will be going from class to class as a precursor to their trick-or-treating.”

            He nodded in response, “Sounds like a normal day.”

            You smiled, “Pretty much.”

            “Alright, well, I trust you two to hold down the fort out here while I make some calls.” He began walking towards his office before stopping in the doorway, “_____?”

            “Yes?” You spun around in your chair to face him.

            “Before the assembly, I’d like to speak with you.”

            “O-okay.” You fumbled, your fingers clenching together.

            “It’s nothing bad. Just something I wanted to run past you.”

            “Of course.” You nodded sheepishly. Then he closed his door.

            Turning back to your computer, you rolled your shoulders, having felt them stiffen at his proposal to talk one-on-one.

            “Why is it they always say, ‘it’s nothing bad’, when it is indeed something bad?” You murmured out loud, not truly expecting an answer.

            “Nick?” Miriam chuckled, “Boy couldn’t hurt a fly even if he tried. You’re not in trouble dear. If I had to guess…”

            You rolled your eyes, recognizing that suggestive tone of your voice very well.

            “Nick is finally going to put his big boy pants on & ask you on a date.”

            You scoffed at that, facing her wide-eyed, “Miriam! He is not going to ask me on a date. He’s my boss!”

            “Oh, pish, posh.” Miriam waved your dismissal away, “I met my husband working for him. It still happens.”

            “No.” You chuckled, focusing on your computer as you read emails, “Not that. Besides, I already have a man in my life.”

            “Your son, as cute as he is, doesn’t count.” Miriam told you bluntly.

            “Yeah, yeah.” You waved her away before sarcastically responding, “Now, shut up. I have very important emails to get back to.”

            Miriam left twenty minutes early for the assembly, leaving you to finish off your morning duties alone in the office. There was still five minutes to spare before the assembly started so you put your computer in sleep mode then stood up to head to Principle Bentley’s office.

            Knocking gently, you waited until you heard the familiar sound of his voice, telling you to come in.

            “_____!” He grinned, rising from his chair, “Please, take a seat.”

            Despite what Miriam teased you about earlier, you still felt nervous. Though she was right about Principle Bentley being a good guy, you still felt like you had done something wrong.

            “So, is this about my being late?” You questioned, your brows creasing.

            “You were late?” He replied, clearly only hearing about it now.

            “Oh…yeah.” You sighed, “I’m sorry about that. It won’t happen again, I prom—”

            “_____, it’s okay. You’re not in trouble. Miriam bails on her duties all the time & have I spoken to her about it?”

            “Well, no, but it’s Miriam. No one really wants to cross her.” You joked, trying to lighten the anxiety bubbling in your chest.

            “Sure, sure.” He nodded in agreement, “Look, I don’t mind if you’re late. You could be two hours late & it’d be fine. I mean, what are you gonna miss, signing kids in & out? It’s fine, really.”

            “Okay.” You felt yourself relax, “If you say so.”

            “I do.” He chuckled.

            “So, what is that you wanted to discuss?”

            Principle Bentley sucked his teeth in awkwardly before finally leaning forward on his desk, his elbows resting there with his hands raised, “I know it’s a long shot, but I was wondering if you’d be interested in getting lunch together today.”

            “Oh.” You felt your smile drop. Oh. Miriam had been right.

            “No pressure, either!” He rushed out, “I know how weird it’s gotta be having your boss ask you out but I don’t know, figured I’d at least try.”

            “Yeah.” You chuckled awkwardly before gathering your thoughts, “The offer is nice, Nick. But—”

            “Nick?” He asked incredulously but was smiling nonetheless, “Using my name? I know what that means.”

            He was letting you let him down easily & you were grateful towards him for it.

            “But I’m going to have to decline.”

            “I understand.” He nodded, never losing his boyish smile.

            “Ya know, in a perfect world, I—” You stopped yourself, unsure if you really wanted to say what you were about to say, but the look on Nick’s face encouraged you to keep going.

            “In a perfect world, I’d say yes.” You admitted. Nick was a good guy. He always took care of you & Miriam. Plus he enjoyed working with the kids & all parents sung his praises. Nick Bentley was a good guy, & he’d be an excellent father. Truly, that was something you wish you could have given Lou, a father, but with your past still terrorizing you in your sleep, it just wasn’t possible.

            “And what is a perfect world?” Nick asked, his voice soft.

            You sighed, biting your lower lip in thought. “I love being a mother. I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.”

            For some odd reason, you were ready to tell someone your life story, or at least the nicer parts about it. Something indeed was in the air.

            “But I had Lou when I was young, too young. I was nineteen. I wasn’t ready… & ya know, Lou’s father…” You inhaled sharply as those startling blue eyes of your ex flashed through your mind. “Let’s just say he wasn’t a good guy. I’m just not ready for another relationship. Or dating, even. I just want to focus on being a good mother to Lou.”

            Nick eyed you with admiration in his eyes. He nodded in understanding, “Your son is very lucky to have you. I hope you know that.”

            The praise made your heart falter with elation. Because you ran away from your hometown, & couldn’t risk your ex finding you, you were forced to cut off all communication with friends & family. No one had even met your son. Not your parents, not your best friend, no one. It was another aspect of your life that you were furious about. That Lou was forced to only call you family when he had so many more people out there who would love him just as much as you did. But to protect him most of all, you had to stay hidden. So, hearing those words from Nick made your heart swell.

            “Thank you for saying that.” You replied almost inaudibly.

            “Thank you for being transparent.” Nick responded in kind, “I can’t imagine it was easy to share.”

            “No.” You chuckled openly, “It wasn’t. At all.”

            “Well,” Nick stood from his chair, gesturing towards the door, “walk with me to the assembly?”

            You laughed & clapped your hands as kids all over the gymnasium ran amok, your ghoulish son among them. After the usual ‘stay safe’ portion of the assembly, the kids were free to go around to booths the teachers had put together in the spirit of Halloween night. You took to the wall, your eyes following your son as he ran around with his friends, chasing one of the 3rd grade teachers dressed a ghost, playing a game they called ‘ghost hunters’.

            Nick was in the midst of it all, getting tangled up with the kids as they either wrapped themselves around his legs or tried climbing his black. You hid your smile behind your hand as you watched on.

            On the bleachers to your right was Miriam & a few other female staff members. They all appeared to be reacting in shock to something Miriam was saying. You were curious to what tea she was spilling so you found yourself joining them.

            “Why the shocked faces?” You asked. One of the first grade teachers, Isabella, handed you a Styrofoam cup of hot apple cider. You accepted it gratefully.

            “You haven’t heard?!” Sophia, one of the student teacher’s, turned to you in shock, “Someone broke into George Acosta’s barn last night & stole that ancient Chevy truck he’s been working on for ages.”

            You frowned at that. You knew the truck well, everyone did. But only because it made these awful metal, grinding sound as it ambled down the roads throughout town. You could hear it from two blocks away most times as it backfired, alerting anyone in the vicinity that good old Mr. Acosta was out & about.

            “I’m telling ya.” Isabella commented, “Whoever stole it has to be from out of town. No one is idiotic enough to steal from George. Remember when he threatened Sheriff Kaufman with a loaded shot gun just for pulling over a reckless driving teen on his property last year? Even the Sheriff was apologizing profusely to him.”

            The women cackled amongst themselves but you weren’t laughing. The strange occurrence & Isabella’s theory about it being an out of towner made your stomach shift into knots.

            It not him. It can’t be. Someone would’ve contacted you if he got wind of where you were. It was just a random crime, _____. It’s not him. You’re okay. Lou is okay. Calm down. Breathe. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Ex—

            “_____? My god, are you alright? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Isabella placed a hand on your upper back in comfort.

            You nodded shakily but stood up, “I’m alright. Just feeling sick all of a sudden.”

            “You don’t look good, hon.” Miriam added, peering at you with concern.

            “I’ll be fine.” You assured them, “I just need to use the restroom really quick.”

            Everything was okay. It was just your paranoia, you knew that, but you couldn’t deny how ever since this morning you felt like something awful was coming. But you reminded yourself that it wouldn’t be the first time you felt that way & ended up realizing eventually that it was just your nerves & traumatic responses acting up.

            “Nick.” You approached him as he assisted with the gym teacher in replacing a skeleton pinata with a pumpkin one.

            “Hey!” He greeted jovially but frowned when he took in your state, “Whoa, you alright?”

            “I’m not feeling well, all of a sudden. I don’t know what’s happening but—”

            “It’s okay, it’s okay.” He clambered down the ladder he had been on to gently grip your upper arms, “What do you need?”

            “I know I was late this morning but would it be alright if I went home for the day? I just, I don’t want to get the kids sick if it’s something contagious.”

            You were lying through your teeth, something you had gotten really good at, but it was for the right reason.

            “Yeah, of course, of course. Is there anything I can do?”

            Your eyes searched out Lou as he gathered around one of the teachers dressed as a warlock, listening intently to a story he was reading from a book.

            “Yes, but it’s too much to ask for.”

            “Hey.” Nick smiled kindly at you, “There’s no such thing, what is it?”

            “Would you mind bringing Lou home after school? Normally I’d take him with me but he’s having too much fun & I don’t want to ruin his day. Plus, I have no car to pick him up & I don’t want him walking home from school alone.”

            “Of course, yeah, I can do that, it’ll be no problem.” He nodded.

            It took a long time getting comfortable about Lou being alone with anyone who wasn’t you, but after living in the close-knit community as long as you did, you knew that Louie would be in safe hands with whomever you left him with.

            “Thank you, seriously, thank you.”

            “Yeah, yeah.” He stood up straight but remained watching you with concern, “What about you though? Do you need a ride home?”

            “No.” You mustered a grateful smile, waving away his offer, “I’ll be okay. I just need to get home & take a cold shower or something.”

            “Okay, yeah. Will you call me when you get there? Let me know you’re alive & what not.”

            The two of you shared a laugh but you nodded, “Of course.”

            “Alright. I’ll bring him back straight after school. You focus on feeling better.”

            “Thank you, Nick.”

            He gripped your shoulder in comfort before you parted from him to approach Louie. He was still listening to the warlock’s story when you appeared behind him.

            “Hey, baby. Mommy’s not feeling well so I’m going home. Principle Bentley said he’d bring you home after school, okay?”

            He spun around towards you, his youthful face frowning as he peered up at you, “Are you okay, Mommy?”

            “Yeah, I’m okay, I just feel sick, that’s all.”

            “Is it your dreams?”

            “No.” You shook your head rapidly, cupping his cheek, “I just need to lie down for a while.”

            “Okay.” He gave you that soft smile of his you adored so much.

            “Mommy loves you.” You hugged him, kissing him three times on the crown of his head, “I’ll see you later, alright?”

            “Bye, Mommy.”

            “Bye, baby.”

            After seeking out Lou’s teacher & asking her to walk him to the office at the end of the school day so Nick could drive him home, you were finally able to leave work. Fortunately, you only lived five blocks away, so you would be home in no time to get your head together. You hated lying to your coworkers, more so, your son, but you needed to get home to ensure that everything was still ready to go in case you & Lou had to run. Never in the five years that you had lived in your town had you ever had a nasty feeling like you did today. And although you knew it was likely just the eeriness of Halloween mixed with your paranoia, you chose to be safe rather than sorry.

            But as you strolled home, your cardigan wrapped snugly around your front, you couldn’t help as your mind strayed to the past.

            You were in love, maddeningly so. He was everything you could have dreamed of. And the way he looked at you always had you feeling like a schoolgirl with a silly crush. You could never have imagined that you would have found your prince. And that’s just what he was. He was your prince charming & you were his darling princess.

            The two of you were inseparable. The honeymoon phase meant something new with the two of you. Your relationship was filled with laughter, friendship, trust, & most importantly, love. So much love. You never knew you could love anyone as deeply as you loved him, & you knew he felt the same.

            And for the first year of your relationship it was pure bliss. Until it wasn’t.

            Everything changed after you turned 18. You were ready to take your relationship to the next level. He had been ecstatic that you were ready to become intimate & finally have sex. It was how you knew he was one of the good ones, that he never pressured you or tried anything himself. He was respectful & kind & patient. Everything you dreamt about. But once you two did have sex, something changed in him. A darker energy you never knew he had emerged.

            It started out small. He would become touchier. You had reasoned to yourself it was just because now that you two were having sex he was antsy for it all the time. But when the times came that you wouldn’t want, whether it was because you weren’t in the mood or weren’t feeling well, he would make snarky remarks under his breath. And then it shifted again.

            He started to not want you going out with him, even if it was just to a friend’s house to watch a movie. He would text you the whole time, blow up your phone, leave you voicemails accusing you of not being where you said you were. Your friends pointed out to you that his behavior was problematic & that you should discuss it with. And so you did. Why wouldn’t you of? After all, you two had never had serious issues before. But you couldn’t have been more wrong.

            The night you told him that he was beginning to make you feel suffocated would be a night you never forgot. He has lost his mind. You had never heard him yell before, let alone raise his voice, especially at you, but he had done it all that night. When he got to a point where you felt scared to be alone with him you had tried leaving but he wouldn’t have any that.

            It was the first time he raped you. It wouldn’t be the last.

            After the first time though, he had apologized profusely, swearing it would never happen again. He confessed to you that he was just scared of losing you & that you were giving him mixed signals lately. You didn’t understand that, knowing that in your own mind you were definitely not doing that, but he looked so scared, so terrified of losing you, that it had convinced you to stay with him.

            You would live to regret it. His behavior didn’t change, it only got worse. But it eventually go to a point where you were practically chained to him. You stopped hanging out with your friends, quit coming out of your room to visit with your family, stopped posting about your life on social media. You became a scared little girl, & it was all because of him.

            Then when you thought he couldn’t get worse, he proved you wrong.

            The two of you had been attending a beach party. It was with his friends so you weren’t anticipating seeing any of your own, but one had been there. You had known Donovon your whole life, longer than any of your friends. Other than your closest girlfriend, Donovon was your next closest friend. So, when you saw him at that party, you were ecstatic to see a face you were forbidden to see.

            It was your mistake putting Donovon in the devil’s path. Had you known what your boyfriend was capable of, you would have never taken him back. But that didn’t matter. When Donovon saw you, he snuck up behind you, capturing you by your waist & lifting you into the air. You had squealed in fear at first, genuinely scared due to your ex’s mental, emotional, & physical torment, but when you realized who it was, you only felt relief.

            So, you hugged Donovon. Your oldest friend.

            And it would be the last time you, that anyone did.

            The devil had heard your screams of fear & came rushing forward furiously. You had no time to react or stop him as he tackled Donovon to the ground before beating him to a pulp. Donovon didn’t have a chance to defend himself as the devil knocked his head every which way. Others at the party managed to separate the two but the damage had been done.

            Donovon was in the hospital for two weeks before his family took him off life support. Your boyfriend had murdered your oldest friend. And he got away with it, too. Witnesses at the party protected the devil, saying that Donovon had started it. That it was just a fight that got out of hand. No one knew that it would come to that. And most of all, your boyfriend’s father used his influence to ensure his son would never see a sentence. Not even for manslaughter.

            Your boyfriend swore to you that he didn’t mean to lose it like he did but you saw that dark fury behind his eyes. He had. He had meant every single fist brought down onto your friend’s skull, & he would do it again.

            You weren’t safe with him. That much you knew, but you didn’t know how to get away from him. At the time, you were preparing yourself to be one of the women you had seen in those domestic violence movies who couldn’t find their voice to tell anyone the truth. But that all changed when you took a pregnancy test & it came back positive.

            That pink plus sign was all you needed to kick your flight instinct into gear. It took a couple weeks to get everything prepared, but you made it happen. They were the scariest weeks of your life because you were required to sneak behind the devil’s back to get the plan into place. After what he did to Donovon, it took little convincing from old friends & your parents to help you get out.

            But you didn’t want them to get hurt in the process. So, once you had the funds, the drive, & a bus ticket out of town, you told all of those who helped you that you wouldn’t be in contact with them, too scared that if they knew where you were that your ex would do to them as he did to Donovon just to find out where you were. You couldn’t allow that, not again.

            And so you ran, & you didn’t stop running until you reached the New England states. Throughout your relationship, you had revealed to your boyfriend many times how you dreamed of living in the Pacific Northwest. It would be the first place he looked for you. And he had the funds & means to do just that. So you went to the other end of the country, counting your days until he found you again.

            The backfiring of a nearby engine shocked you out of your reverie. You blinked away your memories, realizing you were then only a block away from your house. The backfiring of a nearby engine sounded near the end of the street you were on & you froze, remembering what your coworkers at work had just told you about Georga Acosta.

            You felt safe enough standing there on Main Street, surrounded by townsfolk as they went about their business, but you felt a chill roll up your spine. As if eyes were watching you. As if he was watching you.

            Your flight instinct from long ago kicked in & you rushed into the nearest storefront. It was a Halloween store. The man behind the counter smiled politely at you as he continued helping a customer. You backed yourself up until you couldn’t be seen from the street but could still see the street yourself. As you did, the engine grew closer. You stood behind a shelf at the end of an aisle as you waited for Acosta’s truck to appear. For him to be behind the wheel.

            But when the truck finally appeared, you felt a heavy weight lift from your shoulders. It was Chevy, much like Mr. Acosta’s, but not his. Instead, the truck that ambled down the street was filled to the brim with teenagers hooting & hollering as they wore Halloween masks, playing the iconic Halloween theme song on a boombox from the bed.

            You fluttered your eyes closed, your hand on your chest.

            “Miss, are you alright?”

            Your eyes flew open at the nearby voice. It was the man behind the counter, the customer he had been helping gone.

            “Yes, sorry.” You breathed out, a relieved smile on your face.

            “Did you need to purchase something?” You could tell he was curious about you but didn’t push.

            Your arm brushed against the shelves you had been hiding behind. On the display shelf was a witches hat. You quickly grabbed it.

            “Just this.”

            After paying, you felt safe enough to leave the store, now knowing your imagination was just that. Then you finished your walk home.

            Someone was calling your name. It was like a whisper, close but far away at the same time. Your name was said again, over & over, & every single time it repeated it grew closer, louder. Until nothing. Then it was quiet.

            Then a pair of lips touched your cheek.

            You shot forward in bed, your face coated in sweat, your chest heaving. Your mouth & throat was dry. Holding your head in your hands, you focused on calming down your breathing. You touched your cheek where you had felt the kiss. It was warm to touch.

            It was just a dream. You had fallen asleep, not meaning to, just wanting to lie down for five minutes but it seems your body had other plans. Once you gathered yourself, shaking away the nerves, you stood from your bed, your muscles aching. But as you did you halted immediately.

            The door to your bedroom was open. Not all the way, just cracked open. You frowned. You were sure you had shut it. But ever since getting home, your mind had been a mess. All the anxiety & paranoia you were feeling was eating you away. You were losing it!

            Brushing the concern for you door away, you exited your room, heading down to your kitchen. The clock on the stove read 2:32. School would have just gotten out, Nick would be here any moment with Louie. You chugged a glass of water & opened the fridge, peering inside to get a snack ready for Lou, though you imagined he would be bringing home plenty of candy from the trick-or-treat at school.

            Just as you fingered a package of sliced ham, the doorbell rang. You felt your brows crease, checking the clock once more. 2:33.

            They must have left school early. You thought mindlessly, knowing it was Nick with your son at the door.

            Tossing the ham onto the counter, you rounded the kitchen to the front door. You unlatched the lock & swung it open.

            “That was qui—” Your words died on your tongue.

            There was no one. You frowned, stepping out onto your porch. Looking into your front yard & the neighbors, you saw no one in sight. Your street was quiet & bare of any life.

            So, who rang the doorbell?

            The question only left you reeling. Turning back to go inside, you stopped when something in the corner of your eye stole your attention. On the bottom step of the stairs leading to your porch was a few pumpkins you & Lou hard carved out together earlier that week. They appeared relatively normal except for one.

            Warily descending the stairs, you gripped the banister when you finally realized what was wrong with the single pumpkin. The handle of a knife glinted under the autumn sun as it stuck out from the top of the pumpkin. You covered your mouth with your hand, whipping around to check your surroundings once more. There was no one in sight, not even Eugenia May—the town recluse—was peeking out from her window.

            Your heart was hammering in your chest. You turned back to the pumpkin, kneeling down to inspect further. From what you could make out thanks to the cut-outs of the pumpkin, the knife was long, nearly piercing the other side.

            Why would someone—

            “Boo!”

            A scream tore from your throat at the booming voice behind you.

            Spinning around, you nearly toppled over before Nick managed to catch you by the elbow.

            “What the fu—” Your son looked up at you with wide eyes, “—dge?!”

            “Sorry.” Nick smiled uncomfortably, “It was your son’s idea.”

            Your eyes danced between the two of them as your heart began to settle down. You hadn’t even heard the hum of an engine, let alone their footsteps as they came up the walkway.

            “What are you doing outside, Mommy?” Louie asked, watching you curiously.

            It was then that you remembered, too, why you were outside. You stepped in front of the pumpkin with the knife sticking out, grateful Lou had yet to see it.

            “I was excited to you, baby.” You told him, ruffling his hair. He slapped your hands away playfully.

            “Hey, why don’t you go inside & get a fruit snack, I’ll be in in a moment, I just need to talk to Principle Bentley.”

            Louie charged forward. You smiled wryly, watching his small legs amble up the stairs & into the house.

            “Sorry ‘bout that. Your kid is hard to say no to.” Nick apologized.

            “No, that’s okay.” You waved it away, “I’m just relieved it was you & not someone else.”

            “Who else would it be?” Nick asked, not realizing the dangerous ground he was treading.

            “Maybe the person who stabbed my pumpkin.” You said, stepping out of the way to reveal the petty crime.

            “Oh, shit.” Nick eyed the pumpkin on the bottom step, “Who’d you piss off?”

            Of course you knew it was a joke but you didn’t laugh. In fact, it did the opposite. You frowned, staring at the deadly weapon.

            “Oh, hey, I’m sorry, I was only kidding.” Nick reached for you but you stepped away.

            “It’s—it’s fine. Forget about it.” Bending over, you snatched the knife by its handle before yanking it out. “Just me being fucking paranoid again.” You mumbled but Nick had heard you.

            You were climbing back up to porch when he caught up to you, blocking the way to your door with a concerned look on his face, “_____, I’m sorry, truly I am.”

            You stared at him, unsure of his words.

            “Are you really thinking someone did this to you on purpose?”

            His question unsettled you. You shifted from foot to foot as you avoided his eyes. You could feel your breathing begin to quicken, on the edge of hyperventilating.

            “Hey, hey.” Nick closed the distance between the two of you, placing his hands on your shoulders gently, “Talk to me. If you’re really concerned then we should call someone about it.”

            “No!” You rushed out, “No. It’s nothing. It’s just me being paranoid, it wouldn’t be the first time.”

            You tried to go around him but Nick blocked you once more.

            “I’ll get out of your way, I promise, but…I’ve never seen you like this before. This…scared. If something is happening, I want to help.”

            “You can’t help.” You sighed defeatedly. You were just so tired, so tired of looking over your shoulder, of worrying about if & when he would find you. You just wanted to live a happy, normal life with your son.

            “I can try.” Nick captured your eyes, “If you let me.”

            As you stared back at him, seeing the genuine care for you, the same look you had seen once before in the last man you trusted, you felt yourself soften. Nick wasn’t him. Nick was a good person. Unlike your past, he wanted to help you. And so, for the first time in five years, you let someone in.

            It was nearly 5’o’clock when Lou took off from the dinner table to go wash his hands. Nick helped you clear the table of dirty dishes. You thanked him for his help before placing the last of the dishes in the dishwasher.

            “So, this ex of yours.” Nick began, “You think he’s found you?”

            “I don’t know.” You shook your head, peering out a window over your kitchen sink, “I’ve been living in fear of him finding us for so long that anything remotely out of the ordinary makes me think it’s him.”

            “Well, I can almost assure you that it’s not.” Nick kept his voice low as Lou entered the main room.

            “Go ahead & watch some cartoons.” You told him, to which Lou very happily obliged. Once the TV sounded from the living room, you turned to Nick.

            “How can you assure me that?”

            After Nick made his claim to want to help you, you had told him everything. Everything. Not a detail spared. You weren’t explicit in reciting your history with your dreaded ex, but you detailed enough to get the point across.

            “I called down to the station.” Nick revealed.

            Your eyes widened, immediately questioning if you were wrong to trust him, but Nick raised his hand in reassurance, already predicting your reaction, “I didn’t give any names, I promise. I just asked if they had gotten any complaints about pumpkins or the like being vandalized. You know Brenden Brennen?”

            You did. No one forgot an unfortunate name like that. He was a local teenager, known to be trouble.

            “Apparently Brenden & some of his friends have been going around scaring people. Throwing poppers into driveways, jumping out of bushes, prank calling. I guess even Stephanie Romero’s garage got tagged with fake blood.”

            You nodded, understanding where he was going with it all.

            “It’s Halloween. It’s a spooky night. Kids are just getting up to no good, that’s all. Things are bound to go bump in the night.”

            It did little relieve you but you accepted the likelihood that it was Brenden who stabbed your pumpkin.

            “But what about Mr. Acosta’s truck? I mean, Isabella’s right. No one in town, not even Brenden Brennen, would be stupid enough to mess with him, let alone that truck he holds near & dear to his heart.”

            Nick chuckled at that but shrugged, “Nothing so far as far as I know. But Mr. Acosta is getting up there. Way, waaaay up there. I hear his daughter complain every now & then that she swears he’s got Alzheimer’s, says he’s been losing track of things a lot lately.”

            “A truck is quite a big thing to lose track of.” You muttered.

            “Yeah, it is.” Nick nodded in agreement, “But think of it this way. From the sounds of it, your ex has money, & lots of it. If he were here, he wouldn’t be breaking into a barn to steal a beat-up old truck. He’d probably be driving through town in one of those nice sports cars that rarely come through here. And I say ‘rarely’ because folk like that stick out like a sore thumb. So, if he were here, someone would’ve noticed him by now.”

            Everything he was saying was making sense, & you knew it to be true. You sighed, smiling, feeling like a fool.

            “I just want it to end.” You admitted, your voice soft as you stared at Lou on the other end of the room, “I don’t want to live in fear for the rest of my life. I want Louie to have a normal childhood, not one that he looks back on wondering why his mom was always crying in her sleep or looking over her shoulder every day.”

            “Hey.” Nick approached you, his hand on your lower back in comfort, “You have done so much for him. He knows how much you love him, he sees that. And he loves you, too. It may not be the childhood you want for him but it’s better than the one he could’ve had if you hadn’t run away, isn’t it?”

            “Oh, god.” You marveled horrifically at the thought. You never thought too long, if ever, about what it would have been like raising Lou back home, with him always around.

            “See?” Nick consoled you, “You’re giving him the childhood he deserves. As long as that kid there has you, he’ll be alright.”

            You nodded, peering up Nick, “Thank you. For everything.”

            He grinned sheepishly at that, shrugging, “I’m here for you, _____. For as long as you need me.”

            It had been a long time since you felt like you found someone you could trust. You were happy Nick was the first.

            Surprising even yourself, you raised onto your tiptoes & placed a kiss on his cheek. You watched as Nick blushed at the affection. When you pulled away, you two stared at one another before laughing lightly.

            “Are you going to be my Dad, now?”

            Both of you jumped apart as Lou stared at the two of you from the other side of the kitchen.

            “What was that, buddy?” Nick played off your sons question as you tucked your smile into your teeth.

            “No, baby, Principle Bentley was just helping Mommy.”

            Lou made a questionable face but moved on, “When are we going trick-or-treating?”

            “Oh, um.” You eyed the clock on the stove. It was nearly 6. “Any moment! Go get a jacket on & we’ll head out.”’

            Lou began to run down the hallway before he stopped to stare at Nick, “Are you coming with us, Principle Bentley?”

            “Oh, I, uh, we haven’t discussed—”

            “Yes.” You answered for him, watching as Lou broke out into a smile in response, “Now go get a jacket, mister!”

            Once Lou was out of sight, you turned towards Nick, “It’s probably not the date you had in mind but if you’d like, Lou & I would love to have you join us.”

            Nick grinned that dimpled boyish grin of his, “Then I’d love to.”

            Kids ran amok throughout the neighborhood as you & Nick walked side by side on the sidewalk, watching as Lou raced from house to house, filling his plastic pumpkin candy bowl to the brim. Every now & then, a candy or two would spill out as your son ran happily between yards.

            Lou had wanted you to dress up but you had forgotten to actually get yourself a costume. So, the witches hat you had purchased earlier that day was all you had for a costume. It was enough to satisfy Lou, though the same couldn’t be said for Nick. You ended up having to use some of your own makeup to draw a clown look onto your boss’s face. He looked ridiculous, but you supposed that was fitting.

            “He’s pretty great.” Nick commented, watching your son compliment another ghoul’s costume.

            “Yeah, he is.” You felt pride.

            “Ya know,” Nick began, his hands stuffed into his pockets, “I obviously don’t know anything about your ex except from what you’ve told me—which is all bad, bad stuff—but I hope you know that your son is yours. He’s not his. Even if he’s made up of half of him. Who he grows up to be, that’ll be all you.”

            The thought warmed you. That was all you could really ask for.

            The two of you watched as Lou ran down the stairs of another house before running up to you, practically slamming into your legs.

            “Oof, careful, babe.” You giggled. Lou grinned up at you, holding out a piece of candy.

            “Your favorite.” A Smartie was perched between his fingers.

            You accepted the candy, smiling down at you son, “Thank you, Louie.”

            Then he was off again, more candy spilling out behind him.

            “He has his eyes.” You shared. Nick peered at you as you continued. “At first, that terrified me, ya know, when he grew into them. So much of his father there. So much of…”

            You still couldn’t say his name.

            “But you’re right.” You sniffled, the chilly autumn air beginning to make your nose run, “Louie will be nothing like him, even if he resembles him. He’ll be soft, gentle, kind, so full of life & wonder & happiness. All the things he is now. All the things his father isn’t.”

            The three of you crossed the street once Lou finished up at the last house on the corner.

            “You’re a really good mom, _____.” Nick commented, “Louie is in good hands, your hands.”

            “Yeah.” You nodded, sharing a smile with him, though his smile appeared wider thanks to the red lipstick stretched across his lips & cheeks. You giggled openly, unable to take him seriously.

            “What?” Nick widened his eyes in feigned offense, “It’s not my fault you don’t know how to draw a decent clown face.”

            As you two laughed amongst yourselves, someone suddenly shouldered you, practically taking you off your feet.

            “Hey, watch it!” Nick caught you as you stumbled into a neighbor’s yard.

            You followed his line of sight, staring at the back of what you assumed to be a grown man as he stalked down the sidewalk, his hood pulled over his head. Nick grumbled in annoyance as he pulled you upright but you only remained staring after the man. But he never looked back & before you knew it, he had turned a corner & disappeared from sight.

            “What is it?” Nick asked.

            “N-nothing.” You faked a smile, shaking your head as you turned your attention back to him.

            “Prick should watch where he’s going. Had we been one of these kids we’d’ve been flattened.”

            Nick continued walking down the sidewalk, following behind as Lou continued his night of trick-or-treating. You looked over your shoulder once more & were startled by what you saw.

            At the end of the block, where the man had disappeared off to, there he stood. At least, you assumed it was the same man, standing eerily still just staring at you. But you weren’t sure if it was you he was staring at. He was wearing a mask resembling a hockey mask, his face completely covered. There was no way to tell just exactly where he was looking but you felt it… you felt his eyes staring right back into your own.

            “_____!” Nick hollered your name. You spun back around, realizing they had moved a couple houses down, “Coming?”

            Looking back to the man, you were disheartened to find him gone, the corner barren of anyone taller than five feet.

            Frowning, you caught up to Nick.

            “Everything okay?”

            You weren’t sure, but you reminded yourself of everything Nick had said earlier. If he was here, you would’ve known by now. And like he also said, it was Halloween, there was bound to be scares in the night.

            Lou was slouched against Nick’s chest as he carried him back to your house. He was already half-way asleep, the excitement & running around having finally caught up to him. You carried his pumpkin basket full of candy, leading the way back. Once you reached the steps leading up the pathway to your porch, you peered up at you house, ensuring that nothing looked amiss.

            “He’s gonna have one hell of a candy hangover.” Nick joked softly.

            You smiled back him, “Thank you again for carrying him all this way.”

            “It’s no problem.” He assured you, carrying your nearly asleep son up the stairs to your porch. You unlocked the door to your house, swinging it open so Nick could bring Louie inside.

            “Where’s his bedroom?” Nick whispered. You pointed to your hallway, “Last door on the left.”

            Locking the door behind you, you placed your keys & Louie’s basket of candy onto a counter in the kitchen before trailing down the hallway to his room. Inside, you found Nick gently tucking your son into bed. He was well asleep at that point. You smiled elatedly at the sight. It was a sight you had never seen before: a grown man putting your Lou to bed. It brought you more comfort than you thought possible.

            Nick tiptoed out of the room & you pulled Lou’s door closed until only a crack was left.

            Following Nick back into the main room, you grinned up at him, “You’re my hero.”

            “Oh?” Nick raised a single brow, “Why’s that?”

            “He adores you.” You nodded, “I remember after his first day of school he talked about how the principle came to his class to play games with the kids & get to know them. Of course, he doesn’t understand yet that you’re my boss, so he spoke about you like I had never met you before. You’ve made an impression on him ever since.”

            “I could say the same thing about him.” Nick returned.

            “Thank you again, for everything.”

            Nick approached you, smiling down at you, “This better mean you’ll stop referring to me as Principle Bentley at work.”

            You rolled your eyes playfully at that, “We’ll see.”

            He narrowed his eyes at you suspiciously but chuckled nonetheless, “Well, I better get outta your hair, let you get some rest.”

            You nodded, seeing him to the door. When you unlocked it, Nick stepped out, but before either of you could verbalize a parting, he turned back to you, “And thanks for the date. I enjoyed it.”

            “Me, too.” You admitted, unable to hide your smile.

            Then Nick crossed back to you, leaning down slightly to kiss your cheek, returning your affection from earlier, “I’ll see you Monday.”

            “See you.”

            Closing the door as he descended your stairs, you relocked the door before finally kicking your shoes off. It had been a long day. You were looking forward to winding down in bed with your recent Kindle purchase before dozing off. Turning off the lights in the front room, you grabbed a couple pieces of candy from Lou’s basket before retreating to your room, sure to leave the door cracked this time now that Lou was home. Unlike when you closed the door for your nap earlier, you never kept your door closed as Lou slept, always wanting to hear if any sounds came from his room.

            Getting undressed & into pj’s, you slipped under the covers of your bed, pulling your Kindle out from your nightstand. Settling against your pillow, you began reading the text but it wasn’t long before you felt your eyelids begin to droop. Then, before you knew it, you slipped into slumber.

            A floorboard creaking somewhere in your house woke you with a start. It was dark in your bedroom as you wiped the sleep from your eyes. You moaned at your stiff muscles, having fallen asleep in an uncomfortable position for your neck. Your eyes flashed to your nightstand. The clock flashed 2:24 a.m.

            Your mouth was dry again, & you had forgotten to bring a glass of water to bed. Slipping out of bed, you exited your room. You stopped in the hallway to peek into Louie’s room. He slept soundlessly still in his bed. Closing his door most of the way once more, you trailed quietly down your hallway to the kitchen.

            Once in the kitchen, you approached the cabinets by the sink. You had pulled one open, preparing to reach for a glass, but a sight outside the window above your sink caught your eye. And when you realized what you were looking at, your breath caught in your throat. Nick’s car. It was still parked out front. But more horrifying than that was what lied just beyond it. Across the street, parked in front of your neighbor’s house, was Mr. Acosta’s beloved Chevy.

Before you had time to react, a hand fisting itself in your hair yanked you backwards. A scream about ripped from your throat, but a gloved hand quickly clamped over your mouth before it could.

            Panicked tears erupted from your eyes as you felt yourself being dragged backwards, the soles of your slippers failing to catch themselves on the hardwood. You struggled against the strong grasp of the arm that was wrapped around your middle as they yanked you back down the hallway towards your bedroom.

            You didn’t need to see them to know who it was. All day, your paranoia had been trying to warn you but you didn’t listen, & then when you did start to listen to it, Nick had reasoned it out of you.

            The force threw you onto your bed & you bounced haphazardly atop it before the room flooded with light.

            All of the nightmares you had had in the last five years were occurring before your very eyes. And the man that caused them was glaring at you through the slits of a hockey mask. The same eyes your son had.

            “Boo.” If the eyes of your ex wasn’t enough of a give away as to who wore the spooky mask, the hollowed out voice behind it was.

            He was here.

            Rafe had found you.

            It took all off your strength & will to not scream in that very instance. Lou was sleeping safe & sound less than twenty feet away from you, totally unaware of the dangers in his home, you wanted it to remain that way. But damn it all to hell if you didn’t fear for your life at that very second.

            Fear racked your body & panic ensnared your heart as Rafe Cameron, the ex you had ran out on with his unborn child in your tummy, stood before you.

            Tense silence filled the room, save for the sound of your shuddering breaths. Tears blurred your vision as you stared wide-eyed in horror.

            Rafe was breathing heavily, his chest moving almost in perfect time with your own. Your eyes fell to his hand, the glint of a familiar looking knife catching in the light.

            He had been here all along. From the beginning. The cat store, Mr. Acosta’s truck, Lou’s stabbed pumpkin, & the man in the mask who stared at you on the street. All of it Rafe. All of it your past finally catching up to you.

            “Rafe…” You shakily cried.

            He cocked his head, the mask only adding more fuel to your nightmare. And though the mask kept his face hidden, you knew well enough that the man behind the mask was carrying a face full of fury. It was a face you never forgot.

            He raised a single gloved finger then, wiggling it slowly at you. Then he brought that same finger to the mouth of the mask. Shh, he was telling you.

            Tears burst from your eyes as you bit your lip to keep from whimpering out loud.

            Don’t make him angry, do as he says. Lou is depending on you.

            But images of Lou sleeping in his bed just down the hallway flooded your mind. Rafe was blocking the door. You wouldn’t have a chance to slip by him & race down there, & even if you did, you’d lead him right to your son. If you did that, there was no saying what he would do next, but you knew Rafe Cameron was capable of deadly things, & you were determined to keep your son ignorant to that.

            It took every amount of restraint you could muster up not to run for your son, to shield him from the devil that snuck into your home. You kept a baseball bat hidden beneath your pillows. It had always been there, & only on rare occasions in the past did you feel the need to bring it out when something went bump in the night. But those bumps always turned out to be nothing. This wasn’t nothing. It was time to really use it.

            Rafe only remained standing before you, his tall & solid frame filling the space of your room like a sleep paralysis dream. Though he wore a thick jacket to keep warm, you could see that he had grown over the years. He had always been tall, towering over you, but he was slender as well. Not anymore, though. It was obvious that he had gotten into the habit of working, adding muscles to his already destructive strength.

            Swallowing the scream that desperately wanted to erupt from you, you kept your voice hush as you spoke, needing to distract him with your words as you very slowly, very subtly inched your fingers towards your pillows.

            “What are you doing here?” It was a stupid question, you, especially as well as he, both knew why he was there. But you didn’t care. Just keep his mind distracted.

            But he said nothing, just shook his head once.

            You breathed heavily & sharply, your fingers managing to have slid under your pillow without drawing his attention, desperately seeking out the cool, metal touch of the bat.

            “You shouldn’t have come here.” Your voice shook as you spoke, “You should’ve let me go.”

            But Rafe exhaled heavily at that.

            A relieved, quiet gasp parted your lips when your fingers finally found the bat, fiercely gripping the handle of the weapon.

            Dropping your eyes to the open door behind him, you frowned, “Lou?”

            Rafe turned around at that, expecting to see your son standing in the doorway, but it was only a fake-out.

            Gritting your teeth, you yanked the baseball bat & raised it above you, quickly rushing to your feet to stand atop your bed.

            You let out a war cry as you swung the bat downwards, aiming straight for Rafe’s skull. But he spun around in time to duck. The full weight of your swing made you stumble & one of your feet slipped off the bed. You clambered harshly to the wooden floor, your grip on the bat still tight, but Rafe snatched you by the back of your neck, ripping you upwards. You blindly swung the bat a second time but you felt a force catch the other end before tearing it from your grasp.

            “No!” You cried out as Rafe threw against your dresser, a picture of you & Lou toppling over in the impact.

            You threw yourself back, crab-crawling backwards as Rafe marched towards you, now your bat in one hand, his knife in the other.

            “Rafe, don’t!” You screeched once you felt the wall against your back. But he only continued moving towards you. As he did, he tucked his knife away & raised the bat.

            Fear choked you as you watched your own weapon of defense prepared to be used on you. You raised your arms, readying yourself to protect your face & head from the blow. Your eyes were squeezed shut, waiting for the whisper of air as the bat swung before reaching you…but it never came.

            Breathing fearfully, you fluttered your eyes open.

            The room was empty. Rafe was nowhere in sight.

            “Lou.” Your voice shook with the realization.

            You threw yourself forward onto your feet, getting ready to race after Rafe, but just before you reached the doorway, Rafe appeared again filling the space with his large frame. But he wasn’t alone.

            To your horror, he had another before him, on their knees.

            Duct tape was wrapped securely around Nick’s face, his mouth & most of his nose covered to suppress his grunts. His forehead was swollen & bleeding, evident of him having been attacked by a deadly force. Nick was unable to fight back, as his hands too were securely taped before him.

            A shocked gasp left you as you backed up, taking in the nightmarish sight.

            Rafe entered the room, pushing Nick forward until he fell face-down onto your floor. Nick groaned on impact before struggling to roll himself over onto his back. It was then that you noticed his legs were taped at the ankle.

            Fresh tears breached your eyes as you peered at one of your only friends in the neighborhood. You made to move closer, to shield Nick from Rafe but as you did, you felt the cool touch of your bat catch the underside of your chin. Your eyes trailed the length of it until it led you to Rafe’s hand & arm, thus his face.

            He shook his head once.

            Shaking, you backed away as Rafe stepped closer.

            Nick, the whole time, trying to speak but his words were unable to be made out behind the tape. His flashing between you & your ex with a mixture of fear & anger.

            “Don’t hurt him.” You begged, “He has nothing to do with this. Please, just let him go, I’ll do whatever you ask.”

            Rafe sighed at that, his head cocking at your plea.

            “Please, Rafe.” You whimpered, snot running from your nose, “I’ll do anything.”

            His silence only added to your terror. He wanted you to suffer.

            “You’ll watch.” Was all he said. And before you could absorb what he had said, Rafe moved to stand over Nick & raised the bat.

            “No!” But your scream died in your throat as Rafe brought the bat down on Nick’s skull.

            Cries & choked sobs erupted from you as you watched on in horror as Rafe repeatedly bashed Nick’s face & skull in. You were forced to look away when blood spurted across your face & chest as Nick quickly became unrecognizable.

            You covered your mouth as hot tears fell from your eyes & over your hands. Your room was filled with the gruesome sounds of the bat repeatedly making impact with what was once Nick. Squelching of brain matter & the crushing of bones filled your years & you felt bile rise in your throat. A pool of blood threatened to cake the soles of your feet as it grew bigger, forcing you to pull your knees to your chest.

            The ghastly sounds stopped after another minute & by then you were numb to everything that was happening. Your body still shook, your mouth hung open in a silent scream, but you were no longer crying. Just staring dizzily at your headboard.

            A metallic thud sounded & your eyes betrayed you as you sought the sound out. Your bat rolled towards you, all of it covered in a deep, thick red color, chunks of brain, flesh, & bone texturizing it.

            A gag forced it’s way from your mouth & you crawled away from the monstrous sight, unable to look at what Rafe had done. But as you did, you felt Rafe eyeing you from the opposite side of your room. Before you could react, Rafe climbed on top of your, ensnaring you by the back of your head as he dragged you back over the bed. You thought he would’ve stopped there, but your horrors were only reignited when you dropped to the floor & were dragged into the hallway. Towards Louie’s room.

            “No!” You yelped but Rafe quickly swung you around to his front, covering your mouth. You smelled the scent of blood on his glove as he kept you quiet, knowing good & well that Nick’s blood was now caking your face.

            You fought against Rafe as he yanked you closer to your sons room, terrified that he would do to him what he had just done to Nick. At this point, you didn’t care if Louie woke up, if he woke to the sight & sound of you crying & screaming & fighting against the man from your dreams, thus shattering his childhood. You just needed him to run. Run as far as he could as you once did.

            Once in the room, Rafe forced you to face your sleeping son, none the wiser to the danger approaching. You whimpered & thrashed against Rafe, trying every which way to elbow him or knock your head back into his but his strength greatly outmatched yours. It always had.

            Rafe paused in the center of the room, crushing your back against your front as he secured you around the waist. He removed his hand from your mouth, but before you could scream a blood-curdling cry to alert your son, Rafe had swiftly produced the knife he carried & pressed the briny edge of it to your throat.

            The plastic of the mask moved against your ear, “Don’t scream. Or he’ll scream.”

            The threat was apparent. Your horrors were coming true. Everything you had fought for for so long were crumbling around you.

            “Don’t.” You gasped, desperately reaching to cling to Rafe’s arm.

            Your plea only forced the Rafe to press the knife harsher against your throat. Even you could feel your heartbeat pulsing against it. One swipe & Rafe would end your life before surely ending that of your sons. In a last ditch effort to save your sons life, you revealed the truth that Rafe needed to know.

            “He’s your son.” Sobs racked your body as the words parted your lips. “Our son.”

            Rafe stiffened behind you.

            “Are you going to tell him?” Your mother asked you as she helped you pack one of your go-bags for the great escape.

            “No.” You responded despondently, “If he knows I’m on the run with his unborn kid, he’ll stop at nothing, he’ll hurt anyone I love just to get to me.” You knew good & well that he would still do that, but he wouldn’t be in as such a rush otherwise.

            Your mother nodded in understanding. But her hands shook fearfully as she folded your clothes before handing them to you.

            “Are you going to go through with the pregnancy?” It was a question you asked yourself every day. “I love you, baby, I only want you safe. A kid will slow you down.”

            “I know.” You muttered in agreement, “I haven’t decided yet. I just need to get away first before I do anything.”

            “You’d deliver the baby alone.” She commented. Another thought that kept you awake at night. “We wouldn’t be there to hold your hand.”

            You nodded, tears threatening to fall. Though you were still on the fence about whether or not you’d fulfill the pregnancy, you were leaning towards terminating it. Being on the run was no life for a child. And, your mother was right, the kid would only slow you down if Rafe ever caught up to you.

            Your mother’s quiet sobs drew your attention. She had a hand over her mouth in an attempt to hide her cries.

            “I’m so sorry, baby.” She peered at you through her tears, “We never wanted this life for you.”

            You hugged your mother, & she you. Tightly, lovingly. You burrowed your face into her neck, savoring the form of affection. You didn’t know how long it would be until you ever felt it again, if ever.

            “There’s always adoption.”

            Rafe had tucked the knife away, but kept you quiet by grasping the column of your throat, your air restricted. He continued holding you just like that as he slowly approached your son, his son. He stood just beside Louie’s bed, his knees pressed against the bedframe as he leaned over to peer at the child’s serene, sleeping face.

            You felt as Rafe shuddered before you, his arm outstretched with you on the other end as he kept you at distance from your son.

            “My son…” Rafe’s voice was filled with wonder.

            Tears continued to fall from your eyes, dripping onto Rafe’s wrist where the skin was exposed between the glove & sleeve of his jacket.

            “Our son.” He whispered, but as he did, the grip on your throat tightened. Black dots filled your vision. Rafe turned away from Lou then, facing you head on, his eyes blazing behind the mask.

            You kept him from me.

            His fury was palpable. You tried to breathe, to speak, but Rafe only continued to claw his fingers into your throat.

            Then he began to back you out of the room fast. Your were unable to catch your grounding as your feet tangled beneath you. Before you knew it, you were back in the hallway, your back pressed harshly against a wall as Rafe used the wall to lift you off the floor, your toes wiggling.

            You latched your hands onto his arm, using every bit of strength you had left to try & fight him off.

            Rafe glared at you hard through the slits of his mask, his eyes red, watering, filled with betrayal, contempt, & murderous intent.

            “We could have been a family.” Rafe breathed out harshly, his grip tightening more than you thought possible. Your vision swayed.

            “You took that from me.” Rafe spit from behind the mask.

            “Plea—” You choked, the lining of your vision beginning to darken. Your muscles were loosening. Death awaited you. But Lou needed you.

            Then Rafe brought his other hand to your throat & squeezed. You thrashed weakly until you felt your consciousness begin to slip. Rafe’s hands around your neck were the last thing you felt before you stopped fighting, your body going limp.

            “He’s my family now.”

            A cry tore from your throat as doctors & nurses alike rushed around you. A stinging, hot pain shot up your spine as you felt your insides contort & cramp within you. Your legs were splayed open, blood staining the white sheets that kept you from seeing what happening down below.

            “She’s losing blood!” A voice yelled.

            “Get the baby out!” Another responded.

            “We’re gonna lose both!”

            Tears erupted from your eyes, blurring your vision as you clung to the sheets of the hospital bed, your throat raw from screaming.

            Another pinch & you screamed again, sweat coating your face.

            And then cries filled the room, Lively cries of a baby having been born. You collapsed against the mattress, your body weak.

            “Baby’s out, we got him, he’s okay!”

            You felt your vision go in & out, but you reached your hand out blindly in search of your child.

            “It’s a boy.” A soft voice neared you. Cries continued to fill the room, but they grew closer to you.

            “It’s your boy.” A nurse appeared in your vision as it swayed.

            In her arms, she held something small as it wriggled about in her arms. A single hand stuck out in search of something.

            Then your fingers touched, & the small yet mighty grip of the child clung to your index finger.

            A weak smile crossed your lips, “Louie.”

            But your hand fell as you felt your heart rate slow.

            “We’re losing her!”

            “Louie.” You whispered, his name like a dream on your tongue.

            A gasp choked you awake & you shot forward. Tears coated your cheeks & you were breathing heavily. You winced at the burning, raw sensation within your throat.

            The room, your room, was filled with morning sunlight. Your eyes flashed fearfully around the room. You were still in your home.

            Lou!

            Launching yourself forward, you halted to peer at the floor near the foot of your bed. It was empty. No body, no blood, no bat.

            You frowned. It wasn’t a dream, though. You touched your fingers to your neck, the skin tender as you did.

            He had been here, he had!

            Racing out of your room, you stumbled down the hallway to your son’s room, “Louie!” You screeched, despite the pain it caused you as you did, your throat burning in response.

            But your fears were instilled as you charged into your son’s room to find his bed empty.

            “Louie, baby!” You cried, retreating from his room & tumbling down the hallway, “Baby, where are you?!”

            At the mouth of the hallway, you halted, eyeing your son at the counter bar. His back was to you as he ate pieces of candy from his pumpkin basket.

            “Louie!” You released a relieved cry & approached him. But before you could reach him, another figure appeared in the corner of your eye.

            Rafe rested against a counter opposite your son, a mug of coffee in his hands. He was barren of any mask or clothes from the night prior. He grinned wryly at you, challenging you to attempt anything.

            You eyed him warily, furiously as you continued moving slowly towards your son.

            Lou looked back at you then, a chocolatey smile gracing his youthful features.

            “Morning, Mommy!” He greeted in his cheerful tune.

            Dropping your gaze from Rafe, you peered at your son. Closing the distance, you hugged him to your chest, crying into his hair as you kissed him repeatedly.

            “Don’t be mad. Daddy said I could have candy for breakfast.”

            You shook against your son as you raised your eyes to that of your ex’s.

            “That’s right.” Rafe smirked, crossing the kitchen to where the two of you were. You pressed Lou closer against you, your hands gripping him tightly, ready to shield him from Rafe.

            “And you can have it for lunch & dinner & dessert.” Rafe grinned down at your son, his son.

            “What the fuck do you want?” You sneered, uncaring if Lou heard the fear in your voice.

            Rafe eyed you then, “What we all should want.”

            He peered at your son then, “To be a family.”

            The thought unnerved you.

            “If you don’t get out of my house, I’ll—”

            “Careful.” Rafe cut you off firmly, before casting his eyes to an object on the counter only inches away from his fingers. The knife.

            “Sorry, buddy. Mommy had a bad night.”

            You felt as Louie stared up at you then, “Was it the bad man from your dreams again?”

            Rafe’s eyes stared coldly into your own.

            “Yes, baby.” You replied, your voice shaky.

            “But you’re okay now.” Louie attempting to soothe you as he fingered your hair, “Daddy is here to protect you.”

            His innocence, still intact as grateful as you were, only made you fearful of when Rafe would surely snuff it out.

            “That’s right, Louie.” Rafe peered between the two of you, “Daddy’s home, & we have a lot of catching up to do.”

this is 7/10 requests from my 500 followers celebration request opening!

fuck. that's all i have to say.

big thank you to @namelesslosers for making this fucking AWESOME request, i hope you enjoy it as much as i did writing it, please be sure to share your thoughts w me.

as always! drop a comment, reblog w reviews, or talk to me in my ask box. this is one doozy of a dark fic that has me on edge just waiting for your feedback. so please provide some.

thank you for reading!

oona<3

Read this post on why doing more than liking a tumblr writers work is essential to our content creation.

[my love language is words of affirmation, it would make my day if you could comment your thoughts, reblog with tags, or drop an ask that shows your support. thank you for reading tumblr writers, we appreciate you]

taglist: @jsrafesgirl @bunnycvnts @ditzyzombiesblog

to be added to a taglist read rule 11 here. requests will be dismissed otherwise.

[sansaorgana]

Ok but Buck getting jealous or riled up from a British Air Force trying to get at his gal 👀

EDIT: I've just realized I totally misread this and didn't notice it's about BRITISH Air Force sdfghjkl; I hope you forgive me 🤣 I'm an idiot, I swear to God. feel free to send it again so I'll write another one!!!

hi, babe 🧸 thank you for your request 💗 Buck and reader are in America while this short fic takes place. let's say he got a few weeks off to spend at home 🏡

i currently have 2 more requests in my inbox but i was busy watching the bear today and now i have a slight migraine so i'll deal with them tomorrow, sorry xx

my inbox is open for blurb/short fic requests for major cleven 🤗

"What are you thinking of, doll?" his deep voice made you look up and blink a few times like you couldn't believe that he was there; back in your arms, so close and so warm. You were slow dancing together with Buck for the past half an hour but you couldn't focus on the moment even though you knew you should. He wasn't back for good. Not yet.

"You've only a few missions left," you bit on your lower lip and he chuckled before leaning in to look deep into your eyes.

"Aw, don't think 'bout it, babe. I left it behind for a few weeks, yes?" he pecked your lips and you tried to smile. "Come on, why the long face?"

"I'm sorry," you sniffled back the tears forming in the corners of your eyes and shook your head.

"Makes me think you're not happy to see me back in town," he teased and spun you around gently before pressing you close to him again. "What? Won't be able to see a loverboy for a while?"

"Don't be stupid, Buck. There ain't no loverboy but you," you chuckled finally and pushed him softly.

"There better not be 'cause I'd have to fix his face right."

"Sure thing, big man," you gave him a wide smile and cupped his face to caress his cheeks. You loved seeing your hands on him. You especially loved seeing your engagment ring on your finger. "You look so handsome in that suit, Cleven."

"That's Major Cleven for you, big mouth," he winked at you and you pulled a face to make him laugh.

"Fetch me something to drink, will you, Major Cleven?" you leaned in to kiss his cheek and asked. "All that dancing made me thirsty."

"Yes, ma'am," he nodded and walked you back to the table that had been occupied by you two before. He grabbed his cap to put it back on his head and approached the bar.

In the meantime, you opened your purse and tried to find a compact mirror with the powder to fix your shining nose and forehead. You didn't notice that some man stood above you. When you were done with your looks, you closed the mirror with a loud pop sound and you almost jumped in your seat at the sound of a tall dark-haired guy that kept staring at you.

"Excuse me?" you asked and looked him up and down. He was wearing a suit like your Buck but he was no Major.

"Um, I'm sorry, I've just noticed a beautiful girl sitting here all by herself and… I thought that, well, uh, I'mma fix that, perhaps…?" he took his cap off and squeezed it nervously with one of his hands as his other one went behind his head to scratch it awkwardly.

"And you are…?" you tried not to laugh at him. He was kind of adorable in that.

"Um… Sergeant… Sergeant Tommy Smith, miss," he introduced himself.

"Sergeant?" you raised an eyebrow. "Have you been to Europe already?"

"No, miss, no, I… I am going soon… It's my last few weeks before I go," he explained and you could see sweat forming upon his forehead. "Can I… Can I perhaps sit down?" he proposed, probably not realizing how bold it was. But he looked like he was about to faint any given moment.

"Sure thing, honey," you moved a little to give him a spot next to you but you tried to find Buck amongst the crowd. You couldn't see him, though, which was no surprise because the place was full of people – airmen, soldiers and their sweethearts... or girls hoping to become sweethearts soon.

"You're so… So kind, miss," Tommy nodded his head at you as he sat next to you. "What are you doing here all alone?"

"Who said I was alone?" you smiled at him and he blushed. "Oh, don't worry, he's not the beating up kind, my man."

Tommy seemed to sigh with relief but then his eyes widened at the sight of someone standing behind you.

"Is… Is that him?"

"Oh, honey, he's not scary at all, my man, he's…" you started with a chuckle but then you turned around and you saw the man that Tommy had been referring to.

It wasn't Buck. He was huge, enormous even. You've never seen an uniform so tight on the muscles like that. And he was tall as well. Wearing sunglasses inside at night type of guy. He was handsome, oh yes, he was. But he had this aura around him as if he had thought that the whole wolrd revolved around him. He was also an airman and he was chewing gum arrogantly.

"Is that kid bothering you, love?" he asked.

"Um… No," you shook your head and tried to find Buck desperately with your eyes but there was still no sight of him. "Not at all," you added.

"I'll g-go now…" Tommy stood up to leave quietly.

"No, don't leave me…" you tried to plead in a whisper but he put his cap back on and disappeared as quickly as he appeared.

So, now you were left with the big guy.

"Finally. These new ones are like pests," he sighed and sat next to you without asking for permission.

"Excuse me…?" you squealed but he only laughed and took his sunglasses off to take a better look at you.

"Why so scared, gorgeous?" he grinned showing off a set of pearly white teeth.

"Care to at least give me your name?" you asked, trying to move as far away as possible while staying discreet.

"Let's say you're about to find out later that night when you're gonna scream it, sugar," he winked at you and you almost gagged.

"Oh, I do believe I already have a name to scream," you stated, deciding that perhaps being as vulgar as him would make him finally get the message. But that was not the case.

"That guy's?" he laughed. "That kid's?"

"No," you shook your head and looked around but Buck wasn't coming.

"Something tells me you're bluffing me, little one," he leaned in and you took a deep breath in, trying to calm yourself down.

"Why would I?" you raised your hand to show him your ring. He hummed and whistled at it.

"Nice piece, baby. But it can mean anything," he insisted. "I think you're just playing hard to get, am I right, sweetheart?"

"Please, I am not interested," you shook your head as he was trying to put his arm around you.

"Why not? You seemed to be interested in the other guy and he was a fucking nobody."

"He was kind… And he wasn't pushy," you tried to get away as he was moving closer and closer.

"What's your name, by the way, sugar?" the man asked.

"Her name is Mrs. Gale Cleven," Buck's familiar, deep and warm voice made you look up as you smiled through the tears of humiliation.

He was standing above you with a drink in his hand and he looked oh-so-pissed like you've never seen him before.

"Shit, man, you mean she's married to that Major Cleven?" the big man let go of you and stood up immediately, grabbing his sunglasses from the table. "Thanks for the heads up, dude. And you are…?"

"Major Gale Cleven, dude," Buck answered angrily and you watched how the creep's smile dropped instantly.

"Oh, there's… There's been some misunderstanding, Major, I… There was a young Sergeant bothering your wife and I…" he started to stutter.

Buck looked at you now and you knew that he wasn't angry at you but his intense bright eyes still caused a chill go down your spine.

"Is that true?" he asked.

"There was a young Sergeant talking to me, I invited him to sit with me. He was friendly," you nodded. "I did not require saving as far as I am concerned… You, on the other hand," you looked at the scared big guy, "you were far from polite and you didn't treat me like a lady at all."

Buck put the glass down loudly in front of you and stared at the guy with contempt as the muscles of his jaw twitched.

"Let's take it outside," he proposed as your eyes widened. Buck was never the type to start a bar fight or anything of that sort. And as much as you believed in your brave Major, you didn't want him to fight that huge man.

"Buck, honey," you stood up to put a hand on his chest, "let him go, he's just drunk. He's not worth getting in trouble."

"I'm sorry Major, I didn't mean to be rude to your wife, sir," the man saluted.

"You only apologize because you know she's my wife. Otherwise you'd keep bothering her," Buck squinted his eyes.

"No, sir."

"Yes, Lieutenant, now get the fuck out of here."

"Sir, yes, sir!" the man saluted for the last time before walking away as fast as possible.

"Buck!" you pushed him gently as your jaw dropped. "Where did you learn such language?"

He didn't answer, however. He sat down, took his cap off and ran his fingers through his hair. You could see his hands shaking from restraining himself. You decided to give him a moment so you just sat down as well and sipped on your drink.

"Thanks for the coke, baby," you whispered eventually.

"You're welcome. The queue was long, sorry 'bout that."

"Oh, no need to be sorry," you caressed his tense arm. "Buck, you're okay?"

"Yeah, um, no," he looked up to meet your gaze and you furrowed your brow. He took your left hand and caressed your knuckles. "We should get married for real."

"I know, baby," you smiled widely, "when you come back to me for good, yes?"

"No, now," he insited all of sudden in a serious tone. "What if I don't come back for good?"

"Oh, don't say that! You've only a few missions left and… And this is supposed to ensure that you come back! God won't let you die when he knows you've a marriage to look forward to!"

"I want you to be safe if I don't come back," he didn't listen to you. "You'll have more privileges as a widow."

"Why are you bringing this up?!" you could feel tears forming in your eyes. "You were the one to tell me to stop thinking about it."

"But that jerk made me realize a thing or two, alright? Shh… Shh…" he cupped your face and kissed you. "Don't you want to be Mrs. Gale Cleven for real, sweetheart?"

"I… I do," you chuckled and nodded.

"God," he sighed and pecked your lips one more time, "thinking of you wearing my surname makes me dizzy more than any turbulence I've ever had to deal with."

"Just you wait and see, Major," you laughed through the tears, "being married to me will be the worst turbulence you'll ever experience."

"I hope that's a promise, doll."

MASTERLIST || BUCK MASTERLIST

[coopswhxre]

Word's Mean Nothin'

Boyd Crowder x (Fem)Reader

Word Count: 3,224

Warnings: Smut, unprotected sex, p in v, unprotected sex, creampie

Synopsis: Boyd confesses his feelings for you and things get a little heated.

This is my first time writing anything for tumblr, so please be nice XD

It had been three weeks since your sister Ava allowed Boyd Crowder to stay in the attic of the home you both shared. He had kept to himself, spending his days reading the Bible and listening to the radio. Frankly, you preferred it that way; seeing his smug face was the last thing you wanted after all the trouble he'd brought upon Ava.

On a quiet Sunday afternoon, you decided to enjoy your coffee on the porch, relishing the crisp air, only to be startled by Boyd sitting on the bench by the door, his expression one of deep thought.

With a sigh, you considered him for a moment before turning to go back inside.

"Y/N," his voice was low as he called out your name, his gaze fixed on the woods beyond your property. "Would you sit with me?"

You paused, your foot hovering over the threshold. "Why should I?"

"Please…" His eyes met yours—wide, hazel, and piercing. To your surprise, they seemed to shimmer with what looked like genuine remorse.

"You've got two minutes, Crowder," you conceded, walking over to take the rocking chair opposite him.

You raised an eyebrow, arms crossed defensively as you leaned back. "Well, I ain't got all night, Boyd."

"I've been thinkin' 'bout these past few weeks, what my daddy did to your sister… to you." He gestured towards your shoulder, where a bullet from his father, Bo, had grazed you, sending a chill of remembered pain through you. "I know I can't undo what happened or clear away the bad blood between us, but I need you to know, I'm sorry."

Your gaze hardened, not quite ready to accept his apology, yet you couldn't help but notice the earnestness in his tone—something you hadn't expected from Boyd Crowder. The silence lingered for a moment, punctuated only by the distant calls of evening birds and the soft creak of the rocking chair beneath you.

"Why now, Boyd?" you finally asked, your voice a mix of curiosity and skepticism. "What's changed?"

Boyd sighed, looking down at his hands before meeting your eyes again. "I've had a lot of time to think, up there in that attic. 'Bout my life, the choices I've made, the folks I've hurt." He paused, his voice faltering slightly. "I've realized if I keep goin' down this path, I'll end up all alone. I don't want that. Not anymore."

You watched him, trying to decipher if this was another one of his manipulations. Boyd was known for his silver tongue, and trust was not something easily given, especially to a man like him. Yet, there was something different this time, a vulnerability you hadn't seen before.

"And what 'bout Ava?" you pressed, the concern for your sister surfacing. "What assurances do I have that you won’t put her—or me—in danger again?"

Boyd nodded, understanding the weight of your question. "I can't give you guarantees, Y/N. All I can offer is my word to do better. I wanna protect Ava, not cause her more pain. I hope, in time, you'll see that."

You remained silent, mulling over his words. The evening chill began to seep through your clothes, reminding you of the fading light.

"Time'll tell, Boyd," you finally said, standing up from the rocking chair. "Words mean nothin' without action. You better prove yourself, or you're out."

As you lay in bed that night, the conversation with Boyd replayed endlessly in your mind. His voice, earnest and somber, seemed genuinely filled with regret—a side of him you hadn't seen before. But deep down, you suspected Ava was his true motivation. Boyd had always harbored a soft spot for her, even during her marriage to his brother.

Your thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the radio playing upstairs, its volume carrying through the quiet house. With a muttered curse, you threw off the covers and made your way to the attic to tell Boyd to turn it down.

Reaching the attic door, you knocked sharply before entering. The sight that greeted you made you gasp—Boyd, just out of the shower, clad only in a towel around his waist, his skin damp and his hair slicked back. For a moment, you faltered, taken aback by the stark contrast between his usual rugged demeanor and the vulnerability he now displayed.

"Boyd, the music—it’s too loud," you said, striving to keep your voice steady despite the distraction.

"Oh, sorry bout that," Boyd replied, his tone apologetic as he reached for the radio, turning it down immediately. "Didn’t realize it was carrying through the house."

You nodded, your eyes inadvertently scanning the sparse, dimly lit attic. It was clear he lived simply here, with just a few personal items. The vulnerability of his living situation, combined with the unexpected intimacy of the moment, softened your stance just slightly.

"Thanks," you added, pausing at the doorway. "And Boyd—about earlier… I’m thinking about what you said."

Boyd’s eyes met yours, hopeful yet cautious. "I appreciate that, Y/N. Really, I do."

You were already halfway out the door when Boyd's voice halted your steps. "Wait, Y/N," he called, his tone hesitant yet earnest. You paused, your hand on the door frame, and turned back to face him.

"I just… If you've got a minute, I'd like to say a bit more," he said, stepping closer but keeping a respectful distance. The soft light from the single bulb overhead cast shadows that played across his features.

You sighed, your initial irritation fading into a cautious curiosity. "Alright, Boyd. What is it?" you asked, leaning against the door frame.

He took a deep breath, searching for his words - eyes searching the dimly lit attic before settling back on you. The air was thick with tension, his usual confident demeanor replaced by something more tentative. "I know this ain't the time or place, and maybe it's not my place to say, but…" His voice trailed off as he took a cautious step closer, his expression earnest.

You raised an eyebrow, crossing your arms defensively. "Boyd, if you've got something to say, just say it."

He took a deep breath, his gaze fixed on you. "It's just… these past weeks, being here, seeing how you handle everything… it’s made me realize a lot more than just my mistakes." He paused, swallowing hard. "I’ve come to… care for you, Y/N. More than I should, given everything."

The confession hung between you, startling in its sincerity. Boyd looked vulnerable, almost afraid of how you might respond. "I know I don't deserve a chance, not with my history… but if you'd ever think it possible—"

"Boyd, I—" You started, your mind racing with conflicting emotions.

He stepped forward, closing the gap slightly, his presence overwhelming. "I know it's a lot to ask. I don't even know what I’m asking for. Just… don’t shut me out. Please."

The intensity in his eyes, the raw honesty in his voice, it broke through your defenses in a way you hadn't anticipated. You were about to speak, to chastise him or perhaps to dismiss his words, when impulsively, Boyd leaned in, his hesitation melting away in the moment.

His lips met yours, and for a brief second, the world seemed to stop. The kiss was tentative at first, questioning, as if he was still seeking permission. But as you stood frozen, surprised by your own stillness, something shifted. Maybe it was the isolation of the attic, the soft hum of the now-quiet radio, or the genuine remorse he had shown earlier; whatever it was, you found yourself not pulling away.

The kiss deepened slightly, Boyd's lips firm yet cautious. His hand, tentative at first, found its way to the small of your back, pulling you slightly closer. The warmth of his body contrasted sharply with the cool air of the attic, and you could feel the dampness of his hair, the remnants of his shower, as his fingers gently brushed against your cheek.

The softness of the moment, the gentle pressure of his lips against yours, was disarming. It wasn't rushed or fraught with the intensity of passion often depicted in stories; rather, it was a slow burn, a flicker of something new.

As Boyd finally pulled away, the slight catch in his breath was audible in the quiet of the attic. His eyes searched yours, looking for any sign of regret or rejection. What he found instead was confusion.

Boyd's gaze was unwavering, his brow furrowed slightly as if he was trying to read your thoughts.

"I… I'm sorry if that was too much," he whispered. "I just needed you to know, to really know, how I feel."

The weight of his confession, the unexpected intimacy of the kiss, left you silent for a moment. You were still processing, still trying to align this new Boyd with the one you had known, always calculating, always a step ahead.

His eyes held yours, searching for a sign of how you might react next. The tension was palpable, a mix of anticipation and fear. You took a moment, your own confusion swirling with the unexpected emotions stirred by the kiss.

After what felt like an eternity, you made your decision. Stepping forward, closing the gap Boyd had just created, you reached up to touch his face gently, the touch sent a shiver down your spine. Boyd looked at you, his eyes wide.

Without saying a word, you leaned in and pressed your lips to his again. This time, there was a certainty in your movement, a decision made. Boyd responded almost immediately, his hands moving to your waist as you wrapped your arms around his neck. The kiss deepened, and you invited him further, parting your lips.

Boyd's response was immediate and intense. His tongue met yours, exploring softly, cautiously at first, then with growing confidence as you responded in kind. His fingers pressed into your waist, pulling you flush against his warm chest. The heat from his body enveloped you.

The world outside seemed to fade away as the kiss grew more passionate. You could feel Boyd's heart racing just as fast as yours, his breath mingling with yours, creating a rhythm that felt both exhilarating and terrifying. The soft hum of the radio now seemed like a distant memory, replaced by the sound of your joint breathing and the occasional creak of the attic floor beneath you.

As the kiss finally broke, you both stood there, forehead against forehead, trying to catch your breath. Boyd's hands remained on your waist, not willing to let go just yet, and you made no move to step back.

Boyd finally spoke, his voice husky and low. "Y/N, I—"

"Shh," you whispered, placing a finger on his lips. "Don't. We don’t need words right now."

As the tension in the room shifted from apprehensive to charged, you took Boyd's hand. The air in the attic felt thick, almost tangible with the turn of emotions. Leading him to his bed, you were acutely aware of every sound—the slight creak of the floorboards, the distant call of the night, and the rustle of the towel as it shifted against Boyd's form.

You sat down on the edge of the bed, the mattress dipping slightly under your weight. The soft light from the single bulb cast shadows that danced on the walls, adding to the intimacy of the moment. You could see the outline of Boyd's form under the towel, the tension in his body, and the undeniable evidence of his desire.

Boyd stood before you, his breathing deep and uneven.

You reached up, your fingers gently touching the edge of the towel at his waist. Your eyes met, and there was a silent question in yours, a pause as you gave him a moment to decide.

Boyd's hand covered yours, his grip firm yet gentle. He nodded slightly, a wordless agreement, a surrender to the moment and to whatever it might bring. You pulled gently, and the towel fell away, leaving Boyd exposed.

You let out a soft gasp, your eyes widening in both surprise and desire as you took in the sight of him. His swollen tip, coated in glistening precum, called out to you and you couldn't resist. Your mouth watered with anticipation as you enveloped his length with your lips, savoring the velvety texture against your tongue. He groaned and grasped tightly onto your hair as he pushed himself deeper into your mouth, never taking his piercing gaze off of yours.

You moaned as his hand guided your movements, taking him in deeper and savoring the feeling of being completely filled by him. The sound of your moans vibrating around him was like a symphony to his ears until he suddenly let go, creating a soft popping noise as your lips released his member.

"Damn, Y/N," he gasped. "If you keep that up, I won't be able to return the favor." He laughed hoarsely, that toothy grin of his shining in the dim light before his expression turned dark. "Lie back, baby." The intense heat between your legs threatened to consume you at his words, and you couldn't help but melt at the way the word ‘baby’ rolled off his tongue.

You followed his instructions, shifting towards the head of the bed and easing yourself onto the soft pillows. He moved over you, taking in the sight of your body spread out beneath him, his arousal pressing against your thigh through the thin fabric of your pajama shorts.

His lips trailed down your neck, his warm breath sending shivers across your skin as he pressed himself against your thigh. You let out a gasp as he tugged at the neckline of your singlet, exposing one of your erect nipples. His tongue darted out to flick at the sensitive peak before taking it into his mouth, gently sucking and nibbling.

"Boyd…" you moaned, overwhelmed. "please, more."

Sitting up on his knees between your open legs, Boyd’s fingers gripped the waistline of your shorts, slowly pulling them down. Your heart raced as you felt the cool air against your bare skin. He tossed you shorts aside, eyes filled with desire, as he took in the sight of your glistening cunt.

You clenched your hands in the sheets, your breath hitched as you eagerly awaited his next move. The anticipation was almost unbearable.

Boyd leaned in closer, his face just above your quivering core. You felt his breath against your most sensitive spot, making you squirm. His finger traced your outer lips, teasing the entrance of your heat.

And then, finally, he slipped a finger inside, pushing gently against your tight walls. The sensation sent a jolt of pleasure through your entire body that left you gasping for breath.

"Fuck, Y/N," His voice a mix of lust and awe. "You're so tight."

His fingers delved deeper into your core, twisting and curling to ignite a firestorm of sensations that sent shockwaves through your entire body. Your hips eagerly moved in rhythm with his movements, yearning for the release that felt so tantalizingly close.

As he worked his fingers, his lips met yours in a fiery kiss. His tongue matched the rhythm of his skilled digits inside of you.

Just when you thought you couldn't handle any more pleasure, he withdrew his fingers, leaving you longing for more.

He spat into his hand and slicked it over his pulsing member, preparing himself for you.

Your heart raced as he slowly positioned himself at your entrance, pausing to meet your eyes.

You wrapped your legs around him, pulling him closer, your body begging for the connection that was moments away. And then, with a single, powerful thrust, he entered you, filling you completely.

A gasp escaped your lips, and a wave of pleasure washed over you as you held onto him tightly. Your inner muscles contracted around his length, drawing him in deeper.

Boyd let out a loud grunt, his teeth gritted and eyes squeezed shut as he adjusted to the tightness of your walls. His hands fisted the sheet on either side of your head as he paused for a moment, collecting himself.

Slowly, he began to move, setting a rhythm that sent jolts of pleasure coursing through both of you. You met his thrusts eagerly, your hips moving in tandem with his.

Your breaths became heavier, your bodies glistening with perspiration as the room filled with the sounds of flesh slapping against flesh and the occasional curse from Boyd.

Your hands gripped his back, nails digging deeply into his skin as you pulled him closer. The friction was exquisite, and you could feel the aching need building within you.

Boyd's eyes were locked onto yours, his face a mask of raw emotion. He leaned down, his lips capturing yours in a fervent kiss as he thrust deeper. You moaned into his mouth, your body responding to his every move.

Your climax was building, the pressure growing with each thrust. You could feel it, the tightening coil of pleasure, threatening to unravel. You dug your nails into his back, arching your hips to meet his. The sensation was too much, and you cried out as you peaked, your orgasm washing over you in waves.

Boyd watched you in awe as he continued to thrust into you. The sight of you in the throes of orgasm was more than he could take, and he quickly joined you, his body shuddering as he released deep within you, ropes of hot cum painting your walls white.

Your legs shook with the aftershocks of your orgasm as you melted into the bed. Boyd's weight rested on top of you, his face buried in your neck as he caught his breath.

You ran your hands through his hair, feeling the soft strands between your fingers. "That was…" you began, the words barely escaping your lips.

“Somethin’.” Boyd finished your sentence, his words muffled against your skin when a knock at the door made you both jump.

Boyd quickly rolled off you, grabbing the towel from the floor and wrapping it around his waist. You straightened yourself on the bed, pulling the sheets around you, heart still pounding.

Dear god, you'd forgotten all about your sister downstairs!

Boyd cracked open the door just enough to peek through, and Ava's voice floated in, laced with a hint of amusement. "Y'all planning on making that racket all night? Some of us have a busy day tomorrow," she teased, her tone light but carrying a knowing edge.

A sheepish grin spread across Boyd’s features. "Sorry, Ava," he called back through the slightly ajar door, his voice a mix of embarrassment and mirth. "We'll keep it down."

"Better," Ava replied, her voice now softened with laughter. "Just remember, thin walls in this old house."

[loulouwrites]

HELLISH . AFLIE SOLOMONS

summary: alfie's secretary makes the decision to marry, it's a shame her prospective husbands seem to disappear after one meeting warnings: angst, violence, swearing, jealousy, threats, borderline stalking honestly, muderous thoughts, unedited, unrequited love word count: 3.5k a/n: i've been away for a while bc life is hard. i wanted to write a little alfie story not related to the 'home series' and came up with whatever this is so i hope you enjoy. i'm working on a taglist, so if you would like to be included, lmk <3 also lmk if you'd like a part 2 to this, i've already cooked something up!

She had known Alfie Solomons for about three years, and they had been friends since they had met.

Two years into their strange friendship, she had been sacked from her job as a secretary for an Italian businessman, he didn't say why he suddenly decided he didn't require her services, but they both knew. Tensions were rising between the Jewish quarter and Italian quarter in Camden, and everybody was sticking to their own side of town.

When she had told Alfie about it, he had offered her a job immediately - the rising tensions were partly his fault anyways.

Her mother had not been happy when her daughter came home with news she would be working for Alfie Solomons, but when she saw the stack of notes Mr Solomons had given as a 'pay advance', she warmed to the idea.

It was easy work. He had his men for the nitty-gritty stuff, she merely typed up Alfie's ramblings and sent threatening telegrams to people - it was easier than any legitimate job she had ever had, and it paid better, too.

She would often have lunch with Ollie, Alfie's second in command if you wanted to call him that. She was allowed a longer lunch than he was, Ollie wasn't supposed to have a lunch break at all, but if she were talking to him, it was rare they would be interrupted, unless there was an urgent matter to attend to.

Ollie was a good gossip, better than any of the other men in the bakery, Alfie excluded. But, unlike Alfie, Ollie had no interest in her, sexually or romantically, so she enjoyed the time she could spend talking to him, discussing rumours or chatting about their lives outside of work without it turning into something else within minutes.

"Do you think he'll let me leave an hour early?" She asked from where she was perched on the man's desk, swinging her feet back and forth.

"He'd let you leave now if you asked," Ollie replied, rolling his eyes at the girl. It was true, Alfie would probably still pay her if she didn't show up, he'd let her release a group of pigs in his office if she wanted to.

"He's in a mood, though."

"He's always in a mood."

"Not as bad as this," she pointed to their boss' office, where the blinds were pulled up, showing his figure stomping around the small room, throwing pieces of paper and trinkets onto the ground.

"Fuck," she sighed as a loud crash was heard, though they couldn't see what had bared the brunt of the man's rage from their seats.

"Maybe reschedule?" Ollie offered, his eyes not leaving the glass window of Alfie's office.

"I'm just going to ask him," she planted her feet on the ground, ignoring Ollie's protests. "The worst he can do is say no," she shrugged, walking towards the office door.

"That is not the worst he can do," he called after her in an urgent whisper.

She didn't knock when she entered, she never had, and she wasn't about to start now.

A book flew past her face when she stepped inside, and she quickly stepped to the side, it hitting the wall behind her and falling to the floor.

"What did...that Russian book ever do to you?" She asked, and his head snapped up to look at her, his eyes wide.

"Shit, sorry 'bout that, love," he sighed, wiping a hand over his face but she waved him off, moving to sit in one of the chairs at his desk.

"Bad day?"

"Better now," he winked at her, and she rolled her eyes playfully. "What do you want?"

"I want to leave an hour early," she offered him a wary smile, clasping her hands together pleadingly.

"You fuckin' what?"

"Please, Alfie-" she started, but he was up from his seat before she could finish her sentence, pacing up and down the cramped office with his hands on his hips. "It's only an hour, and I'm not doing anything anyway."

"You're not doing anything?" his eyebrows raised as he turned to face her. "You're really admitting that to your boss?"

"Please, Alfie," she stood up, taking a few steps towards him. "I never ask you for anything."

She scowled at the obnoxious laugh he let out in response.

"Never ask me for anything?" his voice raised an octave to mock her. "A pay advance that you still haven't paid back," he help up a finger as he counted. "A weekday off so you can go shopping when it's less crowded, a bonus so you can get your mum a birthday present, a day off when your fucking cat died," he stepped towards her. "Asking me to come to it's fucking funeral."

"You said it was a lovely service," she placed a hand on her chest in offense.

"You know what?" he sighed, rubbing a hand up and down his face. "Just fuck off, yeah?"

"Really?" She smiled, clapping her hands.

"But you will come in an hour early tomorrow to make up for it, or so help me God, I will come to your house and drag you here myself."

It was an empty threat, and they both knew it.

"Thank you, Alfie." She reached to place a kiss on his cheek, not taking offense when he reached to wipe his cheek when she pulled away, already opening the door to leave. "I'll see you bright an early tomorrow."

She couldn't make out what he grumbled after her.

Alfie waited until she had left the bakery to slink out of his office, approaching Ollie's desk, and tapping on it with his knuckles.

"Why'd she want to leave early?" he asked his assistant, not missing the way the younger man sunk down in his seat.

"I don't want to tell you," Ollie replied, sheepishly.

"Ollie," Alfie warned.

"She's meeting up with someone?"

"Ollie."

"A man. She's meeting up with a man, her mum's friend's son or something. Think she's looking to settle down, you know?"

Alfie hummed, a hand coming up to rub his beard. "Interesting," he mumbled, walking back to his office, landing a smack to Ollie's head as he passed.

Her suitor had been a perfect gentleman. Jacob had taken her to a fancy club in a nicer part of London, had bought her dinner and drinks without grumbling about the prices, and had dropped her off at home with a kiss on the cheek and a promise to take her out again the following weekend.

She hadn't thought a man her mother had set her up with would be particularly charming, but she had been proven wrong, the stupid smile she wore on her face all week being proof of that.

She had been thinking of settling down for a while. All of her childhood friends were married with several children at this point, and she didn't miss the sympathetic looks they would give her when she told them she was still unmarried, still childless, and still working.

Marriage was always something she thought would come naturally -as it seemed to do with everyone else around her - but years rolled by and she was still no closer to the life that had seemed so easily achievable when she was young. So, she had decided to take matters in her own hands, informing her mother and everyone else she could that she was ready to marry, and asking them to let her know if they knew a boy they thought would be a good match.

And, she thought she had found the good match on her first try, but when the week after her date rolled on, and there was no word from Jacob, she realised how stupid she had been.

She had been moodier than ever that week, stomping around the bakery with a scowl on her face, smacking the keys of her typewriter harder than necessary, and barely speaking two words to whoever approached her.

She was not dealing with the rejection well.

So, when a handsome worker - who she recalled was named James -- passed her desk, offering a confident smile as he did, she wasted no time.

She wandered into Alfie's office with her hands clasped behind her back, swaying slightly as she waited for him to look up from the papers on his desk.

"What?" He asked, still reading the scribbles on the page.

"Didn't know you'd taken new people on," she shrugged nonchalantly, keeping her tone light and unbothered.

"And? What about it?"

"I don't know," she shrugged again, stepping further into his office. "Just a lot of new faces around here,"

Alfie groaned, dropping the papers from his hand and removing the glasses he wore from his face. "Since when do you care about new faces?"

"I don't," she laughed defensively. "I was just wondering about one of them, is all."

"You were just wondering about one of them," Alfie's eyebrows rose, and he leaned back in his seat, crossing his arms. "What were you wondering about?"

"I mean...maybe some background..."

"Like what? His favourite fucking book? The fuck you expect me to know?"

"I was just wondering, that's all," she held her hands up in defense, and her boss' eyes squinted at her words.

"I thought you were already seein' someone, that is why you left early a couple weeks ago, ain't it?"

"Who the fuck told you that?"

"Don't matter," Alfie offered her a smile. "Didn't work out or something..."

"No, it didn't," she huffed. "So...about James..." she trailed off, waiting for Alfie to step in, but he merely offered her a blank look. "Alfie," she whined, stomping her foot against the floor."

"Don't know 'im. Sorry, love," he waved a hand dismissively.

"Fine," she spun on her heel, storming out of his office. "I'll find out myself."

James was lovely. She had 'bumped' into him when she was leaving, and it hadn't taken him long to offer to take her out for drinks when he finished his shift, which she had accepted with a grateful smile.

He had met her outside of the local pub near the 'bakery', it wasn't a particularly nice establishment, but the lager was cheap, and she supposed he didn't have the money to spend in a fancy club like Jacob had - not with the pittance she was sure Alfie was paying him.

He was funny, and quite respectful in comparison with some of his colleagues. He had asked her questions about her interests, had shared his own, and she was delighted that they seemed to have quite a bit in common.

They had ended the night at her door, with chaste kiss, and another promise to go out again the following week, and she had closed the door with a grin on her face.

"See you at work tomorrow," he had said as he walked away.

When she arrived to work the next morning, the same grin still on her face, she couldn't stop her eyes scanning the floor as she walked to her desk, desperately trying to seek out James, but, when she couldn't find him, she had shrugged it off.

Maybe he was ill or something.

It was now Thursday. Her date with James had been on Monday, and there had been no sign of him ever since.

It was hard not wonder, had something bad happed to him? Had he been hiding every time he saw her walking through the distillery? Had he been so repulsed by her that he had quit his job just to avoid seeing her again?

The thoughts had consumed her all week, and they had affected her mood significantly. Unlike with Jacob, where she had been an angry force at work, she was now forlorn, barely speaking to anybody, and zoning out of conversations with a vacant look on her face.

It was starting to worry her boss, who spent longer than appropriate watching her from his office window.

He had called her into the office that afternoon, watching as she walked seemingly in a daze, her eyes were duller, and he face appeared more sunken.

She didn't say anything when she took a seat at his desk, nor did she meet his eyes when he said her name.

"You alright?" he had asked, his tone more concerned than he wanted it to be.

"Wonderful," she replied, her voice flat, fiddling with a thread on her skirt.

"You've been wandering 'round like a ghost for the past week, love. What's goin' on with ya? Please don't tell me another fucking cat died."

She huffed a laugh that was clearly fake, still fiddling with the thread when she responded. "I think I'm unmarriable, Alfie."

Alfie's shoulder's straightened at her words, leaning his arms on his desk, he studied her face, watching as she blinked away the tears that were beginning to pool in her eyes. "The fuck are you talking about?"

"Two men in two weeks, Alfie. I have gone out with two men in two weeks and they have both disappeared...literally disappeared, I haven't seen them since."

Her eyes lifted from her dress to meet his, and Alfie was struck by how sad she looked. He had never thought she would be this upset by a couple of boys not getting back to her after one night.

"That's silly, love," he sighed. "It don't mean nothin'"

"Yeah," she scoffed, "it does."

He considered telling her in that moment, he truly did. A better man would have, would have confessed right then and there.

A better man would have told her that they had cornered Jacob after he had dropped her off at her door. How he had almost certainly broken the young man's nose before he had a chance to blink, how he had had his men hold the boy by the shoulders while he whispered a warning in his ear.

"Stay away from her."

He really should have told her that he had turned up at James' shitty flat on Monday night, waiting for the man to return from his date with her. That his worker's body had began to shake when he saw his boss leaning against his front door, his arms crossed against his chest and a cold look in his eye.

"Have to let you go, son," Alfie had said. "A worker that is more concerned about fucking my secretary isn't one I want workin' with me."

James had begun to splutter a reply, but Alfie was already heading for the stairs.

"Best you stay away from her, yeah?"

It hadn't been a question.

He really should have told her, but he didn't. Instead, he had sighed and rose from his seat, moving into the empty chair beside her.

"You ain't unmarriable, woman," he told her, patting her shoulder. "You just chose two fuckin' idiots."

"Whatever you say, Alfie," she said, standing up and walking out of the office without another word.

He should have confessed, but he didn't. He did, however, promise himself he would not get involved in her personal life anymore. The next man she met, would not have to face a threat from Alfie Solomons.

She had been leaving her home to go to work when she had ran into Elijah on the street. He had chased after her, holding an envelope in his hands, waving it frantically when she finally turned around when she heard the stranger's voice calling after her.

"I think you dropped this," he handed her the envelope, and she breathed a sigh of relief when she took it from his hands.

"Oh, thank you," she laughed. "My boss would have murdered me if I lost it."

He had laughed at her words, not realising she wasn't exactly joking about her boss.

"I'm Elijah," he held out a hand, which she took with a smile.

"He's really nice, Ollie," her words were muffled as they travelled into Alfie's office, and he had to press his ear closer to the door to be able to hear her clearly. "A real gentleman."

'A real gentleman.'

Alfie rolled his eyes, 'gentleman' was just another word for a soft prick.

"We're going out again tonight," she told her friend. "Said he has a surprise for me."

"What do you think it is?" Ollie asked her, and Alfie rolled his eyes again. Ollie was worse than a fucking twelve year old girl.

"I mean we've been seeing each other for a while, he's met my family, I've met his..." she trailed off, and Ollie's gasp was clear as day from where Alfie was standing.

"You think he's going to propose?"

And just like that, Alfie's heart dropped to his stomach. He tore his ear from the wall, storming back to his desk, dropping to the seat with a heavy thud.

Of course Elijah was going to propose, of fucking course. She had been seeing him for the better part of four months, and she spent every waking minute talking about the nice doctor, it was natural that his was how it was going to progress.

He regretted not cornering Elijah on is way to work the moment she had mentioned his name, regretted not giving him the same treatment he gave the two men that came before him. He should have, should have twisted the man's arm behind his back until he was crying like a little girl, should have had his men hold him down while he kicked him in his ribs until blood came out of his mouth, he should have put the barrel of his gun to his head an pulled the trigger.

But to what end?

She was a good girl. She wanted to get married, have a few children and take care of the house while her husband was at work.

Alfie couldn't offer her that.

Everything he could offer her, he already had. He had given her protection, a stable income, and some form of friendship. He could never give her what she truly craved. He knew that, no matter his feelings for her - feelings he didn't understand himself - he couldn't give her the life she deserved.

And that thought made him sick.

The room was too hot for him to sit in any longer. Alfie pushed through the crowd of people, shoving them harder than necessary until he reached the door, the sound of music and laughter fading as the heavy door closed behind him.

He took a seat on a damp wooden bench, his head dropping in his hands.

It had been a lovely ceremony, a bit small, and a bit cheap for his tastes, but she had managed to make it lovely anyways.

He stood when she entered, her parents on either side of her, walking her to the end of the aisle.

She didn't spare Alfie a glance, too busy looking ahead - looking at him. The bitterness twisted in his stomach and it took all the self control he possessed to keep a neutral look on his face.

Elijah met her at the end of the aisle, taking her hand and helping her up the little steps, a sickening smile on his face.

Alfie didn't miss the sympathetic glance Ollie, who was beside him, threw him.

"Not enjoying the party?" her voice was as sweet as anything, full of happiness.

"Weddings ain't really my thing, love," he offered her a smile, it dropping as quickly as it came.

"But this isn't just any wedding, Alfie," she said, taking a seat next to him. "It's mine, you should be happy."

"Why is that?"

"You've finally gotten rid of me," she laughed, nudging his shoulder with hers. "You don't have to pay me to sit around and do nothing all day, should save you a bit of money."

Alfie didn't laugh with her, a bitter smile on his face as he looked down at his hands.

"Oh don't tell me you're sad about me leaving?" her voice held nothing but humour and Alfie wanted to scream at her.

How can you be so blind?

Can't you see I love you?

"Nah, I'm just upset it took this long," he said eventually, rising from his seat, patting her on the shoulder as did. "I'm gonna head out, but congratulations, love. You look very beautiful."

Her eyes softened at his words, her smile widening from where she was sat, looking up at him, her eyes sparkling.

He didn't have time to react when she shot up from her seat, throwing her arms around his shoulders and pulling him closer to her.

"You're the best friend I could have asked for, Alfie," she whispered, placing a kiss on his cheek.

"Yeah, well," he cleared his throat, pulling her arms away from his shoulders and taking a step back. "Fuck off, now. You're missing your own wedding you stupid woman."

She laughed, nodding her head and disappearing back into the building before Alfie could blink, leaving him frozen in place, the bitterness that once consumed him being replaced by what felt like an all-encompassing sadness.

'The best friend I could have asked for."

What a fucking joke that was.

[cyxnidx]

MY ADDICTION !

character: sukuna x curvy!black reader

genre: a little bit of everything - some headcanons + scenarios of a teensy bit of fluff, brainrot, & some smut

a/n: decided to start makin' some black fics.

sukuna, who absolutely adores you, he might not show it, but he does. wholeheartedly.

sukuna, who often has his own way of showing you his affection.

you feel a pluck on the top of your head, looking over and seeing sukuna looking down at you, a smile on his face despite being met with confusion. "why?" "why not."

sukuna, who adores your earthy style with your coconut and vanilla scents.

sukuna watches as you finish rubbing lotion into your arms, smiling when you walk past him for your gel and he gets hit by a fresh coconut and vanilla scent. "you smell delicious." he compliments, watching as you sit in your chair in front of your vanity. still focused on your edges, you let a small smirk appear. "thank you." he hums before responding, letting his chin rest on his palm. "do you taste the same, too?" and with that, your smirk grows. "come find out."

sukuna, who finds the most peace with his hands against your hips and his face stuffed into the side of your neck.

"what the fuck." you say with a sigh. you've been in the kitchen with your boyfriends head in the crook of your neck, his hands rubbing soft circles into your waist while you cook. except, the foods done - and sukuna has yet to move. "what is it?" he asks as he feigns innocence. you look at him when he raises his face to look at you. "do you wanna eat or not nigga?" after your words register in his mind, a knowing smirk crosses his face.

whether that be while he's hugging you, or hitting it from the back.

"where all that attitude go? hmm?" sukuna questions behind you, face still buried in the crook of your neck, except the sensation of him massaging shapes into your waist was replaced with his cock pounding into your cunt from your mouth. "had all that mouth .. where it go, huh?" he prompts again, thrusts getting sloppier.

sukuna, who doesn't mind spending a couple hundred to help you keep your hair under control.

"go ahead, princess." sukuna says, twisting a curl of your hair around his finger after handing you $500. he leans down, mouth right by your ear. "go get somethin' pretty done so i can fuck it up again."

sukuna, who loves to see you dressed in white, and the way the color radiates off your skin almost perfectly.

sukuna, who can't ever get over your cooking.

"eating good, ain't you baby?" you ask sweetly, watching sukuna scarf down a thanksgiving meal you'd made for the holiday. the sight of him eating, as if it were his very last or very first meal, put a smile on your face. finishing his plate, he placed his utensils down, a toothy grin painting his face. "best i've ever had mamas."

sukuna, who loves watching you do your hair while it's out, watching mindlessly while you style your curls & lay your edges with precision.

sukuna, who loves your occasional attitude every once in a while.

"oh, and what's the matter?" sukuna asks, watching you roll your eyes once again. "you actin' like you don't got no sense 'bout what i'm saying sukuna." you say, damn near starting to yell at the man in front of you. though, he had a knowing smirk on his face. not because he found this amusing, but because you're the only person with enough guts to so much as breathe near him with any attitude.

sukuna, who commonly calls you an addiction, simply because once he got a hit?.. he couldn't help but want more.

[regressionschool]

It's Sunday night, and as I sit here, thinking 'bout the week that just went away at the regression school, I'm feeling all sorts of happy and excited. My name is Emma, and I've been living in this special place for quite a while.

The week usually starts the same way for me – I wake up with a soggy diaper. It's the norm around here, and no girl in this school starts the day dry. The feeling of the wetness is comfy, a sign that I'm part of this special community where diapers are just a way of life.

As the day goes on, like most girls here, I get to wear diapers. It's something I'm really proud of, a sign that I belong. The caregiver helps me get into them, and then I'm all ready for the day. Potty training is a thing of the past, and I really don't care about it. Why bother with potty breaks when diapers and caregivers are here to help with everything?

Naptime is another part of my day, and it usually ends with me waking up in a soggy and messy diaper. It's a reminder that, in this world, even our dreams are wrapped in a layer of softness. Unlike my friend Lisa, who often wakes up dry. Lisa spends so much time with the potty, and I can't help but wonder why. Pottying always seems to be on her mind, takin' away from the enjoyment of the games and activities. For me, that's what diapers and caregivers are there for – no need to worry 'bout findin' a potty when you're havin' fun.

Thursday brought a curious challenge. Lisa, all excited about somethin', asked if I wanted to try using the potty for a poopy. Mr. Anderson looked surprised and asked if I was sure. Curiosity got the better of me, and I decided to give it a try. After all, it seemed like somethin' big girls do. So, there I was, tryin' to be a big girl, goin' poopy in the potty. It was a bit strange, not as comfortin' as a diaper, but it was an experience.

However, there was a trade-off. Wakin' up clean (well, only soggy) from my nap meant no "cummies" after the nap. So, with that in mind, I made sure to mess my diaper on Friday before fallin' asleep during naptime.

Today brought a pleasant surprise – Lisa, my friend from the school, was back in pull-ups instead of panties. It's a step back toward the comfort we all cherish. I couldn't help but notice that Lisa had a few accidents during the day, a sign that she's gettin' accustomed to the rhythm of this place.

It's funny how things work here at the regression school. Pull-ups seem like a temporary stop before the inevitable embrace of diapers. I've seen it happen to many girls, and Lisa's journey seems to be followin' a familiar path. The caregivers, with their gentle guidance, have a way of nudgin' us toward the comforting embrace of diapers.

[katiapostsss]

DRABBLE:

hayden christensen and books

enjoy!

〰️

"i'm thinkin' about reading this new book," you spoke, your hands absentmindedly running through hayden's ruffled hair in the way that you knew he loved. "mia told me it was good. my coworker, remember?"

you really didn't want to bother him much whenever he seemed on the brink of sleep, but hayden always insisted that he loved it whenever you talked while he was tired. he claimed it helped him fall asleep, which you couldn't deprive him of, so, late at night, propped up against your headboard with his head on your torso and his arms wrapped around your middle, you rattled off meaningless details about your day, from how the price of gas went up at your local gas station or that there was an ache in your left leg. sometimes, he responded, other times, he didn't, and you never pushed him to, either.

"the one who keeps holding you back at work for reshootings?" he muttered, and you huffed a laugh. since you had been shooting a new movie as the lead, your coworker—who you'd worked with in the past and loved dearly—had been the reason for your late arrivals home. hayden loved complaining about it, too, claiming he now understood what you felt like when he often had to leave for his own work while shooting star wars, you, spending most of the time home alone.

"yea." a soft smile tugged at your lips. "it's called 'the book thief'. from what i've heard, it sounds pretty good."

much to your surprise, hayden seemed to wake himself up, drawing his head from your torso and instead, lightly resting his chin there. you peered down at him, a question in your eyes, but he spoke before you could.

"what's it about?" he asked, his eyes darkened in the dull light of the lamp on your bedside table. you breathed a laugh, skepticism creeping across your face.

"since when have you ever shown interest in what i read?" you inquired in return. often, you told your boyfriend about the books you were reading, and though he avidly listened, he never really asked about it much. below you, hayden pursed his lips, face scrunching in what you couldn't guess the meaning of.

"since mia started giving you recommendations," came his reply after a bit of thinking. "why are you asking anyways? are you implying that i'm dumb 'cause i don't read a lot?" he sent you a sarcastically skeptical face, to which your mouth fell open to in mock surprise.

"i would never," you scoffed as if he was crazy for even thinking it. he kept that same look on his face for what felt like eternities until your hands reached out to tug the corners of his mouth into a smile. though he let you, each time you retracted your fingers, his mouth would drop back into that frown. "so difficult," you muttered with a laugh. hayden tilted his head to the side.

"so?"

giving up, you dropped your hands at your sides and looked away, thinking back on your earlier interaction with your coworker and what she had said about the book. "i'm pretty sure it's about this german girl... something about her moving to a foster home 'cause her mom's on the run. takes place during the holocaust." your eyes strayed back to his own, which were intently looking at your face. you grinned. "why do you care, seriously?"

hayden propped himself on his elbows, leaning up to kiss your lips. "can't care 'bout my girlfriend's life anymore, huh?" you giggled when he peppered your face with tender pecks, his lips soft and warm on your skin.

"answer the question, hay." you poked his side, turning your head to the left so he could no longer kiss you. he sighed through his nose, leaning back again and shrugging as best as he could in his position.

"i dunno. i wanna talk to you," he uttered, and your laughter died, your smile blooming even further. you couldn't help but love him even more in those moments, your heart so full you felt it might've exploded inside your chest. "be part of your life more."

"you already are," you reassured, tilting your head to the side and reaching a hand out to run your fingers through his hair once more. he hummed his approval, resting his head on your torso the way he had before you had interrupted his sleepiness.

"okay. continue, please," hayden stated against your clothed skin, hands gripping the hem of your shirt. you smiled.

"alright."

two weeks later.

〰️

the first thing you felt when you woke up was a chaste kiss against the skin of your forehead, shifting, and cold air. you struggled to open your eyes, still weak under the weight of sleep. hayden's voice pulled you out a bit.

"got called into work, love. i'll be back soon," he said. you hummed a small acknowledgment, not bothering to say anything more before you shifted below the sheets and faintly heard the door click open and closed.

an hour later, and you were sitting up against the headboard, yawning and stretching and rubbing the sleep from your eyes. the clock on your bedside table told you it was 8:03 am. still too early, but breakfast was calling to your empty stomach. you looked to the side, upset that hayden was gone and expecting the sheets to be completely empty. they weren't.

a few inches from your thigh, was a thin, rectangular box. a present. it was wrapped up in a sort of newspaper design, tied with a red ribbon. calling to be opened. tentatively, you twisted your body, tucked your legs underneath you, and picked up the gift. it was cold and stark in your hands. not wanting to ruin the intricate paper design, you carefully unwrapped it, mind whirling to a bunch of different thoughts. today wasn't anything special. you couldn't think of a reason hayden would gift you something, but then again, he did love buying you things without you even asking. was it even from hayden?

your breath caught in your throat once it was all opened, a smile blooming on your lips. a copy of the book thief. it was— he even went with the color scheme to simply wrap it up. faded newspaper and red. you huffed a laugh, opening it up, and what was on the inside surprised you more.

'turns out mia has good book taste.' he had read it? there was 525 pages in the book, and he read all of it. for you. flipping open the pages, what you found baffled you even further. he had left notes, as well, little annotations across the pages, with words like 'this made me think of you', or, 'we should do this together'.

mia had good taste, indeed.

.

another drabble because im getting writer's block 🤭

please send any suggestions in! im willing to write anything for anyone rn cause i want to be active on this page

anyways, reblogging is much appreciated! i hope you enjoyed ❤️

[starryschoolgirl]

An Honest Woman Chapter 1

Summary -> Spending your youth as the neglected wife of a rich merchant wasn't what you had dreamed about as a girl. Had it not been for Elvis, the man who maintains the stable house, you could very well have died an early death from loneliness. You were lucky to have a friend as you sat in the big manor like one of the many pretty vases your much older husband owned, but the lines of fond friendship and something else soon begin to intermingle.

Warnings will vary for each chapter, please always read them.

Warnings -> Set in the late 1800s, classic trope of the inexperienced woman with an experienced man, a woman sold to a man for hefty bride-dowry toward her family, unlikely love, swearing, silent pining, neglectful husband, being a child bride in past, age difference, (lots of) eventual smut

WC -> 4.7k

A/N: This is the introduction chapter, as such it will kind of just be showing the dynamics set in the story, some of the rather spicy stuff will occur in the upcoming chapters, so look forward to those!

"Madam?"

You stared up from your palms with a look of alertness, having forgotten you were amidst others in a conversation. The boys that surrounded you, or rather, the two boys and one man who surrounded you stared at you incredulously, the man stepping forward and kneeling down in front of you as you sat on a dusty old crate that he had turned for you to sit down on. 

He pointed at your head and asked with a crooked smile,

"What's goin' on in there Honey?"

You flushed with embarrassment at your rudeness and turned away from the man's gaze, opting to stare at the discarded half-eaten apple in the corner of the stable house, probably the work of one of the boys.

"Nothing Elvis, I was just-"

He laughed softly and shook his head,

"Well that ain't good now is it?"

You stared back at him for a moment and then realized your words, before you could correct yourself he spoke again,

"And what did I tell ya 'bout callin' me that? Gonna get me in trouble with that husband of yours"

You smiled softly and remarked,

"The only thing that will get you into trouble is you calling me 'Honey', now you know he wouldn't like that, and I've told you to stop"

He shook his head and looked to the side, mumbling something under his breath before hovering his dust-covered hand above yours, not touching it, no, never that... But he hovered as closely as possible as he mumbled,

"Now don't you worry about little ole me, Honey."

You tilted your head as you stared down at the man kneeling before you, with a smile tugging at your lips you murmured,

"Who said I was?"

The two boys who worked the stables alongside their mentor, Elvis, began boredly kicking up some dust behind the man as the conversation had died down. One of the boys, Oliver accidentally made his kick too deep as it swung up and hit Elvis in the ass, making his body jump up slightly.

You and the boys began laughing as Elvis stood up and faced Oliver with a stone face. Suddenly it was just you and the other boy, Charles, laughing as Elvis chased Oliver around the stable. Eventually he'd caught up with the boy and lifted him by the back of his shirt.

"Kickin' me like I'm some steed, why I oughta..."

His teeth grit while Oliver yelped for help from you or Charles, being granted none because well, Oliver had it coming.

Elvis walked over to the wooden gates of one of the many horse stalls and hung the boy onto the corner of it by the back of his shirt. The boy yelped and hollered as Elvis stood next to him,

"Those two ain't gonna help ya till ya 'pologize, now whaddaya got to say?"

You stood up from the crate and shook your head with a smile as you made your way over, well aware that the head-strong 13-year-old Oliver wasn't going to apologize. As you reached up to attempt to grab him, Elvis eventually gave in and batted your small hands away,

"Now, now, you couldn't lift a canary out it's cage, I'll get 'im"

You smiled as the boy was lifted down, Oliver immediately ran to your arms, hugging you as you huffed out happily, "Oh poor baby"

As Elvis glared at the smug boy the sound of a creaky gate could be heard from afar. Elvis turned his head to the door leading out to the field and pointed to the boys,

"Oliver, Charles, go check on that, don't need another great escape of the horses"

The boys quickly ran out the door, Charles had started running before yelling back to Oliver, "Bet I'll beat ya to it" to which the younger boy whined as he chased him, "Hey no fair! No fair!!"

You laughed softly and shook your head, turning it to see Elvis' unimpressed stare. You shrugged and asked, "What?" as you made your way back over to your makeshift seat. He followed and lectured,

"Ya know you're too easy on 'em"

As you picked up the jacket that he had laid down for you to sit on so that your dress wouldn't get dust on it, you said pointedly,

"I'm not"

"Yeah ya are"

You turned to him with his now folded jacket in your arms and stared up at him as you replied,

"Am not"

He took a step forward, now staring down at you from almost straight above as he remarked,

"Are too"

As you stared directly up at him, and he down at you, the laughter of the boys outside and the sounds of nature had dulled into sweet background noise as you took in a familiar sound. Elvis' puffed style of breathing through his nose, like sweeps of waves in and out, heavy and heaving. You could almost feel the air leaving him dance along your nose and cheeks as the two of you stood so close.

With a gentle force, you pushed his folded jacket into his stomach and whispered,

"Am not"

As soon as the words left your lips you dropped the fabric into his grasp and quickly ran out the stables as fast as your heeled feet would let you. You could hear his playful huff for possibly one or two seconds, giving you time to just barely make your way out of the oak stable house until finally his vengeful arms caught you.

You squealed at a large pair of hands that wrapped around your waist just as your feet hit the grass.

Suddenly you were like a fairy, your feet lifted from the ground as you continued on your path, Elvis running forward a few feet more before spinning you in a circle while in his grasp.

You couldn't help the laugh that left your lips, and below it all you could hear, or rather feel Elvis laugh into the fabric of your dress that covered your stomach, you deemed the fabric too thin as you felt his huffs of laughter somehow spill through, a warm feeling covering the skin of your stomach as an equally warm feeling filled it.

It was wrong. Granted feeling this way with any man other than your husband was wrong, but with Elvis, it was on a different level. Because it felt so right. Much more right than it ever felt with your husband.

As you stared down at him, his arms still wrapped around you holding you up to a height taller than him, his head was angled in a way that made his chin poke into your stomach with how closely he held you. His eyes just barely poked out to look at you from below your breasts. 

Any other man would take a glimpse, a look. But not Elvis, and that fled you with a feeling worse than one you would've felt if he were like any other man. You weren't a woman in his eyes, you were simply a girl, neglected by her aging husband, wasting her days playing out in the field with the two boys or braiding the hair of the maid's daughters.

What a silly girl you must be to think a man like him would want you. When even your own husband wouldn't go near you.

He let out a breath as he set you back to the ground, you were quick to smooth out the pillowy skirt of your dress. As you turned to the loud joyous laughs of the two young boys you couldn’t help your smile as you watched them chase one of the horses that managed to escape after the latch on the field's gate had popped open.

You’d already been scolded twice by Alexander, your husband, for letting some of his best racing horses get loose.

You bit the back of your knuckle, noting to yourself that you’d need to approach the butler about that troublesome latch. As if he read your mind, he soothed without even sparing your worried gaze a glance, “I’ll get that fixed, a little ashamed I let it sit around ‘til now…”

You looked over to him and replied with earnest,

“Oh but you shouldn’t feel that way. I’m,”

You cleared your throat and held your head much higher as if that would help you feel more confident in your statement,

“I’m the lady of the manor, it is my duty to tend to that. I’ll approach the butler promptly”

Now he looked down at you with a smirk tugging at half of his mouth and a quirked eyebrow, he questioned with amusement,

“Aren’tcha scared of the butler?”

Whatever false confidence you attempted to instill in yourself, was now out the window as you visibly shrank in on yourself and mumbled a quiet, “yeah…”

He only laughed softly and put a hand on your back, assuring,

“I’ll fix it Honey, don’t worry”

You smiled up at him, and gave a sincere, “Thank you Elvis”

“Madam! Madam!”

The both of you turned your heads to Charles who was running quicker than a bolt of lightning, of course followed by the slower, smaller bolt of lighting named Oliver. As soon as Charles had gotten close he slowed to a stop, bending over to catch his breath with his hands on his hips, you would’ve laughed if he hadn’t said,

“The Mister is home, saw his carriage”

Your smile stalled and fell to a much smaller one. You sighed softly and walked forward petting Charles’ hair back before mumbling a quiet ‘thank you’. With that small gesture and one last bidding glance to your little group that made this manor feel like home, you departed, making the long trek back to the manor to greet your husband.

As Elvis watched you go, his hand that had previously rested on your back fell to his side, the warmth in it that came from your body heat which bled through the fabric of your dress now engulfed into a tight fist. Knuckles white and all as he looked down at the grass below him.

He only allowed himself one moment of silence before he tipped the rim of his hat and ordered,

“C’mon boys, got some racks to clean, then I’ll take y’all out for supper in town”

~~~~~

“Oh dear Madam! Where have you been? Goodness is this dust?! Have you been fooling around in the dirt once more?!”

You grimaced as Mary the head maid fussed over your appearance and began to attempt to beat the dust out of your dress’ skirt, in the way a school professor would beat the chalk out of a rag at the end of his lesson. It didn’t hurt much as she attempted to whack it out of your skirt, what filled you was not pain but rather shame. You were still treated as if you were a child, but that could be because you proved to act like one.

“Oh dear, this will have to do”

She then ushered you toward the manor’s great hall, connecting 3 wings of the manor to the main entrance, and as if it were a perfectly staged play, as soon as your feet landed in front of the door where the wife should always be when her husband comes home, your husband had entered the door on cue.

You bent your head slightly and cupped your hands in front of you as his familiar voice filled your ears. You felt a tinge of hope, today was a special day after all. 

It was your anniversary. The big anniversary! Five long years, you hoped that this would be the year. You’d finally be able to show your worth as a woman, to give your husband the greatest gift of all, and show him that buying- no, that marrying you wasn’t a mistake. 

He married you. He didn’t buy you. If he did then all those nights you spent fretting over him, telling your dear friends at boarding school about him, and writing lists and lists of letters to send to him just to remain unanswered, it would all have been a waste.

Your love would have been a waste.

No, stop thinking like that, it was different. And today all your hopes and dreams of the perfect life with your husband would come to fruition. They had to.

He first greeted the butler, tossing the man his coat and asking the man to bring some cigars to his office. He then turned to Mary and asked her if she could fix him a bath. And finally there was you.

As he placed a hand on your shoulder you lifted your head, hoping to find his stare, instead you only saw him pass by, the hand on your shoulder only remained long enough for him to say, “I trust you’ve stayed out of trouble”, and walk right on through the house.

Leaving you alone in the entrance. 

You swallowed thickly and suddenly you were taken back to your first time greeting him, having only reached the marriable age of 16 just a few days prior before you were rushed into a marriage with him, all because your parents had been offered a hefty sum of money as a Bridal Token.

You remember that day, you’d been dressed in your best, and as soon as he got in the door, he passed you by. The maids at the time who stood in the hall gave hushed murmurs to each other consisting of, “Seems she isn’t quite suitable for a man’s taste yet.”, and, “She still has some filling out to do”, and of course the occasional, “Poor, pitiful thing…”

It only made matters worse that after only a month of your time here, you’d practically been fired from your job as lady of the house. You mixed up all the documentation of the servants and their time they’d spent working here, your first social event hosted as the lady of the house went down in flames, literally. 

You thought candlelight would add a tender ambience to your teaparty, and beforehand you’d made handkerchiefs for all the ladies who would be in attendance. So as you were handing them out you accidentally hovered the fabric of one just a little too close to the candle and it caught flames, you dropped it to the table, but then the tablecloth caught flames and it just continued to spread and spread.

Thankfully your life saver, and the man who in the future would be one of your only friends, had come to your rescue. He quickly put the fire out and offered you along with the other aristocratic ladies his greetings.

That would be the last time you’d see him for the next two years however, as your husband deemed it a wise choice to ship you off to an overseas boarding school. Leaving all of the town to gossip about what a horrid wife you must’ve made. Some rumors even spread that he’d had you killed on the way to the docks.

Of course that wasn’t quite the case. As you now stood to inform everyone who deemed you a dead woman that while you were away you had accidentally caused a few more fires. But those are stories for another time.

“Oh Dear,”

You lifted your head at the soft voice you recognized, it was Josephine, a maid who you’d become close friends with. She quickly marched over and pulled you into her arms, and in that gesture you felt secure enough to fall apart in her arms, your tears streaming down your cheeks as you rested your chin on her shoulder. 

“Oh now, it’s alright… What does he matter anyway?”

You pulled back and stared at her wide-eyed putting firm hands on her shoulders as you warned frantically,

“J-Josie, if somebody hears you say that they would throw you out!”

Josephine continued on firmly,

“So what if they do? At least I’ll have remained true to my character, much unlike the rest of these living corpses”

She said the last part with a bit more volume as if to get her message across to the said corpses, but no one was in the room to listen. You shook your head as more tears tracked down your cheek, smiling fondly before tucking your head into her neck for comfort, mumbling a cherishing, “Oh Josie…”

After she held you for a few moments, she mumbled encouragingly,

“He’s bound to call you to his bedroom tonight to go over what’s happened in the manor within the last fortnite he’s been gone… Why don’t we gussy you up, and show him what a woman you are..?”

You held your breath as if it were hope you were desperately clinging onto. Then you asked, with a tinge of excitement,

“You think so?”

She pulled back to look you in the eye,

“I know so!! Goodness, we’ll need lots of time, I’ve gotta get you in the bath now Honey!!”

She clasped your hand in hers as she led you up the stairs, the two of you giggling girlishly with each click of your heels.

~~~~~

After hours of scraping off any sort of scent on your body, you’d been plunged into a bath filled with rose petals and goat’s milk, soaking for only a rest of 10 minutes before being pulled out. Josie roughly rubbed in all sorts of smelling oils that your husband had traded from a merchant from the East. 

Your hair was let down to grace your figure as you slipped into a long silk nightgown, with sheer lace accents in all the special places, of course to maintain your dignity you wore a long silk robe over it all as you walked through the hallways.

As the doors opened you met eyes with your husband, he sat on the bed in his own robe, reading glasses on and a few documents in hand. He noticed you linger shyly at the door, so with a beckoning hand he offered,

“Come in”

You nodded and quietly clicked the door shut behind you, pulling your robe close to you as to not reveal the surprise, only when you sat at the edge of his bed staring up at him, did you let the shoulders of the robe fall, revealing the thin straps of your nightgown that revealed much of your collarbones.

You stuttered his name,

“A-Alex”

He stared down at his documents as he asked a disinterested, “Yes?”

You bit your lower lip nervously before asking shakily,

“Do you know what tonight is?”

He hummed for a moment and offered plainly,

“It’s the 22nd my Dear”

You looked down at your fidgety hands, did he not remember? You scooted closer to him, sitting on the edge of his bed by his thighs now. He only bothered to notice you as you placed a hand on his thigh. You mumbled quietly,

“It’s our anniversary Alex…”

He stared at you as if you were a foreign sight, then his lips pursed before he said uncaringly,

“Oh, why I suppose it is…”

While you held his gaze you shrugged the robe off, leaving you only in your risqué nightgown. He looked back down at his documents and continued,

“Well, happy anniversary then Darling, what did you get- I mean, did you like what you got?”

You felt tears well up in your eyes, you knew he never personally got you anything, it was always up to his aides to buy you things for your anniversary, but it still hurt being faced with that ugly truth so directly. You sniffled softly.

“Mhm, t-the jewels were absolutely stunning Alex, I- I really loved them…”

He smiled softly up at you, placing a gentle hand on your cheek as he hummed,

“I’m glad”

He pressed a gentle peck to your cheek, but before he could pull back you put an eager hand at the back of his head, fingers buried into his brown hair with strings of gray beginning to form within it.

You maneuvered your lips onto his and leaned forward with him as his head fell back on the pillow. Your hand that rested on his thigh lifted to a new resting point which was his chest. 

For a moment you felt a sensation entirely new, his mouth had opened just slightly just enough for him to let out a gasp of surprise, but as soon as that was over his tongue had dipped between your lips.

He only allowed himself that for a moment before pulling completely away and keeping a tamed hand on your chest to keep you back.

“Darling this-”

You said his name with dire need,

“Alex..!”

“No!”

Your movements came to a halt as he raised his voice, your body had stiffened. You hated when he yelled. He stared at you and sighed as he noticed the change in your composure. Alexander brought a hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose.

You stood up and backed away, keeping your eyes trained on him for a reaction, he only waved you away, “Just..! Leave, Darling, please leave… Now.”

You sniffled one final time and ran out the room, as you slammed the doors open in your leaving you saw your dear friend Josephine who must’ve been listening at the door holding her nose. You were too flustered, sad, and embarrassed to regard her as you went running down through the halls of the manor and to your room, slamming the door shut behind you.

The night was long as you’d cried your heart out onto your pillow, Josephine was at your side as a faithful friend (and you made sure to apologize to her numerous times for hitting her nose with the door). And when morning finally did come, Josephine informed you that Alexander would be out on business for the next few days, as apparently something went wrong with a transaction he’d made when he was in the South.

But the days would continue on, as they had in the time he was gone. And for a while you could pretend that you didn’t have a husband, that you were just a rich, happy woman, entertaining her friends which consisted of a maid, a stable-man, and two stable-boys.

One of which had a weird way of showing his worry the next day:

“Jesus you look like one of  ‘em big-eyed bugs-”

Before Charles could continue his critique on your swollen eyes, Elvis had hit him in the back of the head and muttered, “Don’t take his name in vain you fool… And quit commentin’ on a lady’s appearance. Got a lot to say for someone missin’ a whole tooth up front there”

You smiled at Elvis which he returned back to you before continuing to carry a few wood planks over to the other side of the stable, some of the wood had begun to rot from the rainy season, which meant a tune up was needed.

You rubbed your eyes gently, murmuring more to yourself than anybody, “Do they look that bad?”

Sure you spent a large portion of the night crying, mainly from your own embarrassment rather than feeling sad that you didn’t lose your virginity, though that was a negative too.

You sighed softly as all the memories of the night before had replayed in your mind.

“Alright, are ya ready?”

You looked up at the familiar voice that seemed pointed toward you, and there stood Elvis, a flowy white blouse tucked completely back into his black trousers, it looked like he made some sort of attempt to dust off the dirt that had once been on it. In his hand he held a lead tied to the horse's bit ring.

You stared at him plainly and tilted your head in confusion, he scoffed and gently tapped the crate you sat on with his foot, “You’ve been mopin’ around all day. Really bringin’ the morale down for us workers ya know? So I’m doin’ us all a favor, I’m takin’ ya to town.”

Your eyes lit up, you hadn’t been to town in almost a year, the last time you went was to go shopping for the holidays. It’s not that you weren’t allowed to go, it’s only you never had someone to go with. Josephine worked long hours and when she wasn’t working she needed to tend to her mother, ah right you needed to send her mother something…

“...pie…”

The boys looked at you like you were crazy, and it was clear they’d been spending too much time with Elvis as he had the exact same, eyebrow-quirking expression slapped on his face as well.

You asked wide-eyed,

“Can we get pie while we’re in town? Josie’s mother has been under the weather and I’ve been wanting to send her something”

Elvis smiled fondly at you and walked around the horse, which was actually his personal horse, Rising Sun, to tie the lead around the other bit ring. 

“Sure Honey, we’ll go get pie, in fact let’s get three pies, one for Ms. Josephine’s mother, one for you, and one for me”

Charles chirped in pointedly,

“Ahem”

Elvis looked down at the rascal with a glare, you of course gave in and gently ruffled the boy’s hair, cooing softly, 

“And of course we won’t forget you two, what kind of pie would the two of you like?”

Oliver piped up with a mischievous smile,

“One for each right?”

Elvis sent the kid a look and mumbled,

“Don’t push it kid, we’re getting the two of ya whatever pie is on sale”

Charles elbowed Oliver and Oliver whined at the action, you laughed softly with a shake of your head as you reached to stroke Rising Sun’s mane. Elvis hollered to the boys as he finished settling the saddle,

“Now y’all keep an eye on the stables or there will be hell to pay and no pies”

You looked at Elvis with a fond smile, “You’re too hard on them”

“Nah, you’re just too easy”

With that he knelt down by the horse, resting his palms flat open on his knee for you to step on. You stared with an unsure gaze. “I’m wearing heels Elvis…”

He processed that for a moment, unsure of the difference it would make.

“And I’m wearin’ trousers? What difference does it make now?”

You sighed softly and reasoned,

“I don’t want to hurt your hand”

Elvis gruffed out, “What’s hurting right now is my other knee cause there’s a damn rock digging further into it as you dilly-dally. I’m not a piece a glass Doll, now c’mon”

You still looked hesitant. 

“Y’all sure are takin’ a while!!”

The both of you turned your heads to mischievous Oliver, Elvis hollered his way, “Now you hush up!”

He stood up abruptly and said, “You asked for it princess”, before picking you up, arms wrapped around where your thighs would be under your dress, you were practically slung over his shoulder, like he were some ogre kidnapping a princess.

You abruptly felt a change in angle and the feel of the saddle below you, Elvis crawled out from the layers of your dress and kept a steady hand on your waist as you tried to settle in. It’s been a while since you rode a horse, yes, but something seems different this time… Oh yes, now you remembered.

“Elvis, where’s the side saddle?”

The side saddle, it made it easy and was the couth way for women in dresses to ride a horse. Though now it seems the fashion of heavily layered dresses was going out the window, it was still helpful.

Elvis shook his head and informed, “Those things ain’t safe, they’re a thing of the past now Honey”

“W-Well how am I supposed to ride this?”

With a huff Elvis had mounted the horse, and you could feel his entire front against your backside. You tried to remind yourself it’s just casual. It’s just horse-back riding into town with a friend.

“It’s simple,”

As he settled in behind you, the two of you felt impossibly close. His mouth just happened to be inches away from your ear as he mumbled,

“All ya gotta do,”

One of Elvis’ arms wrapped around your waist to rest at your thigh, and the other barely had to reach over to rest at your other thigh, both of them connected as your legs dangled off the left side of Rising Sun.

You could feel the stubble of his cheek grace your own cheek as he peeked around to see his hands and the way you were positioned,

“Is spread ya legs”

This is more of a passion project that came to me, and I'm having so much fun with it so far! Plus, it's my first series so I'm very excited in general!!

[nqmonarch]

hihi! I want to say that I really LOVE the way you write Blade <33 and also what do you think about Blade with a reader who was part of the hcq in the past being reincarnated and joining the stellaron hunters in the present timeline but they don't remember anything from their past such as being Yingxing's lover

Yeah! Of course :) Didn't know if you wanted Yandere Blade or normal Blade assuming the former because it's the only Blade, it's not anything hardcore tho, I've written so far but let me know if this doesn't suit you, and I'll try again :)

Warning: High Cloud Quintet Spoilers,

TW: Kidnapping, Yandere

Note: Reader is a vidyadhara (think that makes the most sense in terms of reincarnation)

You knew everyone fairly well but you knew Yingxing the best. The two of you spending evenings next to each other in the same bed and days by each other's side. You weren't much of a fighter but he made you a weapon nonetheless and you carried it everywhere.

You would laugh as you saw Jing Yuan and Yingxing train while Jingliu would make them run laps every time they messed up their stance. You would stare at the skies with Baiheng and speak about worlds you'd only heard of in stories. Dan Feng was the one you knew the least but as everyone else became rowdy the two of you would stand in silence, both of you smiling with equal understanding of each other.

Then Shuhu, an emanator of abundance, attacked and those happy moments drifted off as dandelion seeds in the wind. You focused on evacuating citizens, fighting off mara struck with the knowledge you'd gained from watching Yingxing train. Your eyes were always on his body. Jing Yuan had been with you initially, the two of you had been talking about what to do for Yingxing's birthday. Beneath Jing Yuan's aloof exterior there was still a child, he was young after all.

You weren't sure where everyone else was but you only hoped they'd be okay.

Baiheng died. Dan Feng and Yingxing committed a sin, which would lead to both of them being banished. Jingliu returned but was struggling with mara. Jing Yuan was left to deal with the consequences as you left. You couldn't leave your lover on your own could you?

So you followed the mess that Yingxing was, making sure he never got hurt too much, trying to keep him safe. He didn't look the same, white hair turned to a blueish black and cool gray eyes turned a burning hot red. You still loved him, he didn't remember you, and whenever he did it was followed by a bout of pain. Part of you didn't want him to remember, if it was that terrible.

For the majority of the time you stayed by his side he was in and out of it, struggling to even move at points. You weren't around to see when he was able to fight time and again, when he went and hunted after Dan Heng, and how every time he was slain he came back stronger anew.

You had to leave, otherwise you likely would've died. You did it while he slept, otherwise he would've realized and maybe you would've felt too guilty to leave. But you had to go through the rebirth process. You left behind a journal for yourself to read and so you would go back to Yingxing but you never got the chance. After all if anyone else read it, why would they want a Vidyadhara leaving and risking their life, when population numbers already dwindled? Especially if they were risking their life for someone who almost ruined everything.

You were told you took a hundred extra years to hatch. You learned everything anew, deciding to pick up a weapon, it felt comfortable in your hands. Sometimes you'd dream of fighting mara struck off with it, sometimes the weapon was idly by your side as you felt joy course through dream you's body as you spoke to a friendly white haired male.

The thing was throughout a hundred years of living you'd never found a reason to live. The only thing you longed for were your dreams. You'd heard of a land called Penacony, where you could live in your dreams, and you'd smuggled your way in but it wasn't what you thought. You wanted to live in your memories, not some idealistic world. So you wandered planet from planet in search of something, anything. Your only purpose became finding a reason to live.

Everything changed when a woman called Kafka recruited you, she was all smiles and charm, and promised you the thing you were looking for. You'd been skeptical and challenged her but when she elaborated that you'd be able to live within your memories, you decided to join her. Whether Elio's plan worked out or not mattered naught to you, so long as you were able to live in your memories again.

Your dreams got fuzzier harder to reach with time, as if your past life was slipping away from you. This wasn't supposed to happen. But things improved slightly when a man with long navy blue hair eagerly joined the Stellaron Hunters. He looked at you with a strange longing gaze, it was honestly rather pathetic. Pathetic looked good on him though, well he looked good in general.

"Blade," Your voice held no extra emotion to it as he walked over to you, he felt strangely familiar, as if existing by his side wouldn't be that bad.

So you hung around him often, you weren't sure why he hung around you but he didn't speak much to you. It wasn't that there was nothing to say but too much to say, to the point he couldn't say anything. Instead he often clung onto you like you were his lifeline, in bouts of mara, his grip hurt but it wasn't the worst pain you'd experienced. Being a Stellaron Hunter meant you'd faced your fair share of fights. Now that Blade was here, you got hurt less and less, he'd tank blows for you and annihilate whoever you were against. There were always large stains of blood left in the place of your battles but you never got dirty.

You wondered what he would do if you died, go insane? From the little sanity he had left, "What would you do if I died?" You asked a slight smile on your face before returning to your usual silence.

You didn't have a moment to speak before you felt your back crash against the cold, hard floor knocking the air out of you. Normally you'd be able to keep up with Blade while sparring, although you doubted he had the heart to go all out against you. Now he gripped your biceps with no regard for your feelings, yet, it only lasted a few seconds as he loosened his hold to remove the pain yet keep you still. His knees rested next to your hips, and you could feel the heat of his skin through your clothes.

"...You don't like that question?" You spoke with a grin on your face, was he really so attached to you?

Hot red eyes glared at you, as if you'd just committed a sin, "No. You... don't understand anything now. You... you've done far more than you should've." He forced himself to let go of your arms, standing up and walking away as stiff as a board. It was as if the very process was agonizing.

You stared at his back in puzzlement, "...Blade did you know me?"

He didn't answer.

Which led to your turn to chase Blade, always a step behind. When you weren't following him, you knew he was nearby, somewhere you couldn't see him. You could feel his gaze rest on your head, it felt very unique. You'd beg Blade for any clue about your past but he would remain quiet, as if ignoring you. He'd still step into all of your fights, blade itching to be used.

You only made progress on the mission where you'd been ordered to go to the Xianzhou Luofu, as someone who'd been raised there you happily snuck along even if it wasn't your mission. You were sure Elio knew anyway. Blade was on his own mission and for once you were alone. On the Luofu you met a man that gave you the same familiar feeling as Blade, a young fellow by the name of Dan Heng. He didn't recognize you at all though, so you assumed you didn't know him. He was the only one to catch a glimpse of your face without your cloak.

You traveled with him, Luocha, and Sushang for fun before dashing off to the streets, cloak covering any distinguishable part of your body, to buy some snacks. You ran into a short dragon girl, who felt somewhat familiar, but you doubted you knew her too. But then there was the general of the Luofu, a well spoken man, who put on the appearance of a slacker.

Did he sleep because he could no longer stand life? He felt familiar as well but you also empathized with him and that was why you went up to talk him. Putting on the act of a fortune teller, you saw a hint of recognition when he heard your voice. He agreed to let his fortune be read, and you did so staring at him for any other hint of your past. He looked at you very sorrowfully.

You weren't sure what compelled you to say it but you shared some thoughts with him, "I sleep a lot too," you suddenly remarked, uncaring that it gave away you having watched over him for a while, "Less now. But in the past the only place I could live was my dreams, memories of my past life. I yearn for them, dearly."

The general looked at you his smile waning, "Then perhaps one day we can discuss them." So he did know you. Who... exactly were you in the past? How did you find so much happiness, in the simplest things? How could you do that now?

But the two of you were never able to discuss that as the final act of Blade and Kafka's plan came into fruition you found yourself between a mournful Jing Yuan and Blade, who'd reappeared. You didn't mind Blade's company, he just got in the way sometimes.

Especially when he was holding the blade of his sword to the only person who'd been willing to help you recover your past. Jing Yuan didn't put up a fight, it was rather strange, instead he spoke in a wistful tone, "The two of you found each other again." Perhaps you'd been closer to Blade in your past life than you thought.

You'd unceremoniously been brought back to the ship the Stellaron Hunters were currently using. It was not by choice. Blade held you in his arms as you kicked and bit and scratched. He didn't mind in the slightest. He may have even liked it which dissuaded you a bit from continuing. You didn't scream, he'd probably kill any bystanders who cared anyway.

It was annoying. Even once you were back on the ship he was always by your side, literally. One part of his body had to be touching yours at all times, otherwise he'd begin to panic.

"...Tell me about my past." You demanded, glaring at him, concerningly more upset over this matter than him kidnapping you and his constant clinginess.

"Of six people, three must pay the price... why did you waste your time caring for someone like me? You love me..." then in a pitiful voice, seeking for confirmation he asked, "right?"

You looked at the mess of the man before you, had you loved him in your previous life? If so, then wasn't he part of your happiness... So you'd have to learn to love him again, "Right," You lied with a smile, resting a hand on his back as he embraced you burying his face in your neck.

The moment Blade couldn't see your face the smile dropped from it.

Imo Blade would hide his own sinful past and actions from the reader and not want them to have to embark down the road of pain, since he knows how terrible it is.

Reader is also lowkey a two faced person, don't know how much you guys noticed, but they put on one of those facades but inside they're like i'm dying inside yay... ._. i like two faced characters :) they're so fun to read in stories, haven't really written one before though

I honestly think reader is more unhealthy than Blade like yeah he's kind of obsessed with you but at the same time reader just concerning like highly fucking concerning. Did not mean for reader to be so concerning just happened.

Anyway as much as I love like that I waited 800 years for you troupe! I'm not a big fan of it, personally, with Blade's character just because he's a very big red flag for a relationship even as a non yandere. Being in love with someone from the past can turn out good but I feel like with Blade it would turn out so horribly and he would just see a memory as opposed to the past, present, and future of the reader.

I like the idea of him falling in love with someone while he's Blade because Blade feels like a very different person from Yingxing.

That being said the idea of reincarnated lovers always has its own kind of charm :)

[cheolaholic]

ring of love; csc (02)

summary; agreeing to join vernon spectate an underground boxing match wasn't how you'd expect to spend your friday night. you also didn't expect to see seungcheol, someone you've lost contact with for years, become a part of the ring.

modern! au • boxer! au • hhu focused • multiple kinds of tropes • fluff, angst, smut

a/n; smol update regarding taglist, unfortunately i can only tag up to 50 people in the post and i've reached the limits and is unable to tag the remaining people that signed up om the taglist which is such a shame bcs ik a lot of yall were looking forward to be on the taglist ㅠㅠ

however, i do still want to voice out my thank yous to the immense amount of support you've all given towards this fic 😭 🫶🏻

taglist at the end !

you sat in the crowd, stunned as you watched the match progress.

gone was the unsettling and/or overwhelming feeling of being at the event. instead, you felt a surge of mixed emotions.

how did seungcheol end up being a part of the match?

how did he know vernon?

had he always been in seoul?

why hadn’t he tried to reach out to you?

a loud gasp from the crowd pulled you out from your train of thoughts. as you looked at the ring, you saw seungcheol lying on the ground, a hand over his stomach - you felt a sinking feeling in your guts.

as the crowd chanted ‘get up!’, you clasped your hands together, silently chanting along with them. ‘get up..! please, get up..! choi seungcheol, get up..!’

it seems as though he’s heard you, or possibly from the chanting from the crowd that was supporting him, as he slowly got up, the crowd starting to cheer once again. you could feel your anxiety rise as seungcheol got into his stance, preparing for another round with his opponent.

“first timer, eh?”

turning your head to the side, an older man who seems to be in his 40s gave you a gentle smile.

“pardon?” you responded.

"it's your first time experiencing this, ain't it?" he repeated. nodding your head, you turned to face seungcheol who threw an uppercut towards JK, causing him to stumble back a little.

"don't worry about scoups. he always gets back on his feet. that's why he's been the champion for the past year!"

past year…? he's been doing this for a year?

before you had a chance to ask the old man any further questions, the announcer's voice boomed through the speakers.

"and the winner is - scoups!"

the crowd erupted in cheers, accompanied with a loud applause as scoups and JK were escorted out of the ring, a text from vernon lit up your screen.

vrrnonie: come on back

vrrnonie: i'll introduce you ;D

when you got to the back, it took you ten minutes to argue with the bouncers before vernon showed up to vouch for you.

"she's with me boys, don't worry 'bout it!"

walking beside vernon as you both walked towards the waiting rooms, your nose scrunched up at the smell of sweat and body odor invading your nostrils.

"vernon, how long have you known these people?" you asked, the statement the old man made still lingering at the back of your mind.

if seungcheol had been doing underground for the past year, that meant he either knew vernon before or after he got in.

at least that's what you assumed.

"hmm, i knew mingyu first since we're in the same major!" he answered, "though, he's a year older than me, but we share a few classes together. then, he asked me if i've ever been to underground boxing matches and that's how i came to know wonwoo and coups hyung."

nodding your head, he stops in front of a door with a hanging sign that wrote "SCOUPS". just as vernon was about to open the door, whoever was on the other side decided to open it first, startling you.

standing in front of you was a tall muscular male - his skin was a nice tan and reminds you of a puppy with his curled locks.

you blink once. then twice.

what the hell is pledis' top model, kim mingyu, doing here?

it took you a few minutes to put two and two together - top model kim mingyu, is friends and in the same major as vernon.

"where’d you disappear off to, bro?" mingyu asked, sounding worried.

"sorry, man. went to pick up a friend," pointing to you, it was then mingyu noticed your presence.

"oh, hi!" he greeted, stepping aside and motioned you to enter the waiting room, "come on in, girlie~"

taking a step into the waiting room, you look around, hoping to find seungcheol but to no avail. as if he had read your mind, vernon asked where he was.

"he went to the toilet to freshen up," mingyu answered, "wonwoo hyung went with him. so, who's your pretty friend?"

reaching out a hand to the model, who gladly shook it, you introduced yourself.

"i'm lee ___, vernon's frie-"

"-bestie," said boy corrected, giving you a goofy smile when you side-eyed him, "the day you accepted my coke and made that comment on my outfit, you've signed an invisible contract to be my bestie for life!"

"ah, so you're the poor girl who has to deal with his ass when he isn't with us," mingyu commented, earning a laugh from you as vernon whined.

30 minutes go by and you find yourself enjoying the conversation you're exchanging with mingyu. you found out his father owns a famous art gallery while his mother works as a model (you've seen her a few magazines and it amazes you how she doesn't look like she's aged one bit). his parents want him to follow in a similar career choice as they do, which is why he took up art as a college major; and took modeling as a part time job.

you were extremely invested in conversing with mingyu, you don't realise two other people entering the room until-

"...pup?"

whipping your head around at the nickname, you felt your heart in your throat as the air got knocked out of your lungs.

there he stood, right in the flesh.

it felt like a fever dream.

"pup, is that you?" seungcheol asked, taking cautious steps towards you; his eyes full of hope.

when he's finally stood right in front of you, his body towering over yours, your breathing quickened and your heart thumping so loud you could hear it. seungcheol cups your face in his shaking hands, as if he couldn't believe what his eyes were seeing; as if they were deceiving him (and honestly, so did you).

"...cheollie..?"

your voice came out quieter than you expected, but he heard it.

a wide grin spread across his face as he heard that oh-so-familiar nickname, pulling you into a bone crushing hug.

"it really is you! oh my god, i can't believe you're here!"

you were stunned, frozen in place. thankfully, you weren't the only one as you noticed vernon, mingyu and a male who's wearing glasses, which you assumed to be wonwoo, watching you and seungcheol with both amusement and confusion evident on their face.

"you two… know each other?" vernon asks.

"ah-" pulling away from the hug, seungcheol steps aside as he wraps an arm around your waist, the action that has your heart thump harder against your ribcage, "boys, this is ___. she and i go way back."

vrrnonie: i can't believe you knew coups hyung

vrrnonie: and didn't tell me

vrrnonie: i feel so betrayed

vrrnonie: i thought we were besties

traitor 💔: BITCH

traitor 💔: I DIDN'T KNOW CHEOL WAS SCOUPS

traitor 💔: HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW

vrrnonie: …

vrrnonie: okay, fair enough

vrrnonie: but how come you've never mentioned him tho?

vrrnonie: he said you both went way back

vrrnonie: yet i never heard you talk about him

traitor 💔: you never mentioned about him before too asshole

traitor 💔: you only brought him up TODAY

traitor 💔: technically yesterday

traitor 💔: yea, the stage name sounded familiar

traitor 💔: but how was i supposed to know it was the same cheol

vrrnonie: you should've majored in law instead lmao

vrrnonie: but yea, fair point

vrrnonie: but still tho

vrrnonie: when he said way back

vrrnonie: how far back did he mean?

traitor 💔: can we not talk abt this

traitor 💔: i'll tell you when i feel like it

traitor 💔: but really, i just don't want to think abt it

vrrnonie: yes ma'am

vrrnonie: you must be tired after that tho

vrrnonie: get some rest, bbg &lt;3

traitor 💔: vernon wtf

vrrnonie: hehe

vrrnonie: but fr tho, get some rest

vrrnonie: tonight definitely exhausted you

vrrnonie: see ya on monday

letting out a sigh you set your phone down, staring up at the ceiling of your bedroom - replaying the encounter repeatedly in your mind.

how long has it been since that day? the day your teenage love-struck heart got shattered into pieces?

you don't even remember.

you were about to close your eyes, a not so brilliant plan into trying to sleep the feelings away and deal with it in the morning, when your phone chimed.

unknown number: hey, pup

unknown number: i got your number from vernon

unknown number: it's me, cheol

you stared at the texts, unsure of what to reply.

you do, however, hit up the boy who gave out your number.

ma bestie 💅🏻: YOU GAVE HIM MY NUMBER???

vrrnonie: yea?

vrrnonie: oh shit

vrrnonie: was i not supposed to?

ma bestie 💅🏻: nono

ma bestie 💅🏻: it's just

ma bestie 💅🏻: i'd appreciate it if you'd let me know you gave him my number

vrrnonie: ah-

vrrninie: sorry bout that

ma bestie 💅🏻: it's okay

you received a few more texts from seungcheol, but you've decided to leave it up to morning or future you to deal with. part of you felt bad for ignoring his texts, mainly because you haven't seen him in years; and as he's currently making an effort to reconnect, your plan is to ghost him (at least until you're ready to face him).

another part of you felt as though he deserved the treatment. it may seem childish and petty, but you kept trying to justify it by telling yourself that he went on for years without talking to you; surely he’s able to handle a few hours of the same situation.

but as minutes go by of tossing and turning, the blinking notification light of your phone eventually gets the best of you.

cheollie: i know it’s been years since we last saw each other

cheollie: i was wondering if you wanted to meet up this weekend?

cheollie: for lunch, dinner, anything?

cheollie: to catch up and well, explain myself

sweet pup: hey

sweet pup: uhm, it’s currently 2am

sweet pup: so i don’t think lunch is an option

sweet pup: dinner sounds good tho!

cheollie: ah yea, sorry for texting quite late

cheollie: but i couldn’t help myself and you know how i am

cheollie: dinner it is!

cheollie: we’ll figure more of this out later in the morning, okay?

sweet pup: sure thing, cheollie

cheollie: get some rest, pup

cheollie: wouldn’t want you falling sick or be too tired for tomorrow <;/3

sweet pup: i could say the same for you

sweet pup: you must be tired from the match

cheollie: goodnight pup

sweet pup: goodnight cheol

you set your phone aside, rolling onto your side as you made another attempt to fall asleep. but with the anxious feeling pooling in your gut as your heart was beating rapidly in your chest, that was proven to be giving you a hard time.

that’s how you ended up on the floor of your living room, back leaning against the couch as a random netlfix series played while you drank your third bottle of soju.

sure, it was a bad idea and you knew you’d wake up with a killer hangover.

but, in the end, you managed to finally sleep - albeit it being on your couch.

taglist (unable to tag a few ㅠㅠ)

@yoonclip @1004luvangel @catjunhui @mystikha @spk93 @tinkerbell460 @yoozuku @dnylwoo @christinewithluv @limbomoon @plutoxxxworld @i-give-up-1234 @m1ngyuc0re @yunloyal @leclercloverbot @bettybeako @billboard-singer @ocyeanicc @krupyadoorrahe @seobinnieshi @xcynthiaaa @k411z @disneyprincesshuri @sunnyapp @khxsh @staygenezy @loufi8iepuff @ursweetener @noisypapergalaxy @wonwootakemyheart @sugainpinksweater @leah-rose03 @thisisnotthelastofus @yearnoclock @kwonhoeshi @minhui896 @ohmygodwhyareallusernamestaken @ru-lin @deobiforever @belladaises @cheoliekkuma @duskunt1ldawn @hyneyedfiz @marshmallowshouse @ak6ko @chwevernonlover @jejuboo-s @tsukinluv @atinytinaa @gyros-cum-sock @soupbinlily @jungwoos-luvr @ener-energy @watermelon-sugars-things @cyberpunkhwx @ddaengpotate @nightwingsrobbinhoods @chaerrylov3r @joshuaahong @wonussmile @uliceeeeeeee @wonwoo24 @shinetogether17 @simplejihoon @luvkpopp

[siredtosturniolos]

https://www.tumblr.com/siredtosturniolos/749200097735213056/first-of-all-im-sorry-if-this-is-the-wrong-place

I just read this and omg it’s so fucking good like ????

way you’re wording it 😩😩 I’ve an idea for part 2 (if u make one) since the age gap is 18 and 23 u should make it a „forbidden“ love like I mean that reader and Chris are scared to tell Matt and nick (or anyone) about their relationship because of the age gap and they keep teasing each other in front of their friends and siblings maybe have sex and almost get caught. Something similar to that yk. For part 2 u should definitely let the relationship be a secret. Love uuuu

forbidden

Paring: Chris Sturniolo x Reader

Part 1: enemies

Summary: part 2 (part 1 is enemies!) A few months later, you and Chris had finally put a label on what the two of you were. Nick and Matt had made several comments about the age gap being weird, so Chris wanted to hide the fact you guys were dating. So you also had to keep it off social media. You both stick to teasing each other, gentle touches when no one is paying attention, but Chris has had enough. He want's to come clean, but do you?

Warnings: Brief smut, almost getting caught, lots of teasing 🤭

Authors note: thank you for the idea for part 2! Hope you enjoy it <3 (also going to start part 3 tomorrow! ;)

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

My eyes meet Chris’ in the slightly crowded room, and I suck in a deep breath when he lowers one of his eyes into a wink. He looked so good tonight, wearing a new zip up hoodie with grey, blue, and red graphic designs I hadn’t seen before. He paired it with dark grey jeans and had a black shirt underneath, his silver chain catching the lighting just right.

I’m shaken from my thoughts as Sam and Colby approach me, Sam holding a drink out towards me. “Thank you!” I smile up at him, giving them each a quick side hug.

I could feel Chris’ eyes burning into the side of my face as I listen to Colby’s newest paranormal experience, and I can’t help but smirk slightly. I knew Chris was jealous Colby had my attention, even if there wasn’t anything more to it than two friends talking.

“Hey guys.” I’m startled as Chris suddenly appeared next to me, throwing his arm over my shoulders.

“Hey man! Good to see you.” Sam grinned at Chris, dapping him up. Colby followed suit, “Whatcha’ talking ‘bout?” Chris asked, turning to look down at me.

I suppress a knowing smile as Colby restarts his story. Half way through I manage to sneak my arm around Chris’ waist, and I almost laugh feeling him tense up.

“That must’ve been so scary.” I tell Colby, letting him know I was still present in the conversation as Chris had went radio silent. Colby nods in agreement, and Sam chimes in with what he had also witnessed that night.

I let my fingers slip underneath the fabric of his sweater, then under his shirt and I can feel the goosebumps rise on his skin. I lean my head on his shoulder, ignoring Chris' eyes as he whips his head in my direction.

Sam gets interrupted by Jake calling him over, as Corey had just shown up and they both excuse themselves. The second their backs are turned to us, Chris immediately pulls my hand from his waist.

"The fuck do you think you're doing?" He asks me darkly, staring down at me in the way I've come to love.

I shrug, looking up at him innocently, "Nothing." I manage to see past him and find Nick and Matt staring at us, questioning looks on their faces, and I take that as my cue. "Nick and Matt are looking, we should probably split up for a bit." I sigh, knowing I'd much rather follow Chris around all night.

Chris lets out a groan, "Damn. I wish we could just tell them so we could actually spend some decent time together." He rolls his eyes before squeezing my shoulder gently, and walking away to talk to Tara and Larray.

I walk over to the fridge and grab a can of lemonade, just having it cracked open when someone clears their throat behind me. I turn around mid sip to find Matt, crossing his arms over his chest with a disappointed look on his face.

"You look like a dad right now." I tease him, and I can tell he was fighting for his life to not crack a smile.

He shakes his head, "I may as well be. What's going on with you and Chris?" He asks me, lowering his arms as he maneuvers around me to also get a lemonade.

I put on my best poker face, "Nothing? We're just friends." I reply, shrugging my shoulders slightly.

Matt raises an eyebrow in reply, "Then why were you two just holding each other like that?" He asks, taking a sip of his drink.

"Our love langue is touch, Matt. You know how Chris is, you've only known him for all of your life but 2 minutes." I joke, making his face settle back into it's natural resting position.

"Well, then how 'bout we stand like that? Since you guys are just friends he won't mind." He grins at me, acting like he just caught me in a lie. He underestimates how far I would go to prove something, even if I am lying.

I set my can down and open my arms for him, "Lets do this." He's clearly surprised, but shuffles towards me anyways. He wraps an arm around my shoulder, and mine goes around his waist. I tickle him slightly and he nearly folds in half, causing me to laugh.

"Stop!"

We stand like this for a minute, before Johnnie walks over to get a drink. He starts talking to Matt about some band Johnnie had put him on, and I decide to look around and see what Chris is up to.

I find him still standing with Larray and Tara, but he’s looking at me. His face is scrunched up in anger, and I instantly begin to worry. He notices I’m looking back, and lets his eyes trail to Matt with a “What the fuck?” look on his face.

I glance at Matt, who’s still talking to Johnnie, “Hey, I’ll be right back.” I tell him, making him barely nod before he resumes his conversation with Johnnie. I walk towards the bathroom, hoping Chris would follow me.

I close the door and rest against the sink, biting my lip nervously. I hope Chris isn’t mad. There’s a soft knock on the door before it opens, revealing Chris. I take a step back so he can enter.

“The fuck was going on out there?” He impatiently asks.

“Matt was suspicious of us so I told him we’re just friends and friends stand like that together.” I tell him, grabbing both of his hands and giving them a reassuring squeeze, “You know you’re it for me.”

“Damn straight.” He grins at me, before lifting a hand to my jaw and tilting it upwards so he could kiss me. I let go of his other hand so I could wrap them around the back of his neck, tugging him closer to me.

The kiss gross sloppy, teeth clashing and Chris’ hands slipping down to my waist. He lifts me on top of the sink with no warning, making me gasp into his mouth. His tongue makes its way past mine, exploring my mouth. I left out a soft moan, and Chris groans in response.

“We should just tell them.” Chris whines as he pulls away, placing kisses down my neck.

“They’re gonna be mad.” I reply, tilting my head back so he has easier access. "Clearly they think the age gap is weird or something." I sigh as Chris leans away from me.

"At this point, they're going to be mad we've been hiding it from them for over a month." Chris points out, making me frown, "All that matters is that we're good with it."

I nod, "And we are. We can tell them soon but tonight with everyone here probably isn't the best idea." I reply, watching as Chris begins to smirk at me.

"We'll tell them tomorrow," He mutters, lifting his hand to toy with the band of my skirt, "But we can have some fun right now." With that, his hands guide my skirt down my legs and I can feel my heart pounding.

"Chris, your brothers are like 5 feet away from us!" I gasp, making him roll his eyes.

He lowers himself onto his knees, "Yet you aren't stopping me, angel." He begins to plant kisses up my thighs, making my legs spread for him on instinct. I can't ever say no to Chris when he wants to go down on me.

"Chris." I whine out as he presses a harsh kiss against my clit through my underwear. He meets my eyes and lowers one in a wink, making my center throb with need.

"Please touch me." I beg quietly, threading my fingers through his hair.

He hummed against my inner thigh, "Since you asked nicely like a good girl." He teases me, swiftly removing my underwear and stuffing them into his pocket. He gives me no time to protest as he quickly runs his tongue through my folds, letting it circle my clit.

I let out a breathy moan, instantly lifting my hand to my mouth to silence myself. I can't be loud considering there's a whole ass party on the other side of the door. Chris lifts my legs so they're resting against his back, and pulls me closer to him.

"Fuck!" I whine, rolling my hips into his face to which he lets out a moan, sending pleasurable vibrations up my spine. His large hands grip and squeeze at the sensitive skin of my thighs, almost distracting me from the fact he had just sucked my clit into his mouth.

I feel the coil begin to form and I squirm slightly, "Fuck Chris," I quietly groan, "Feels so good." Chris hums a reply, making my back arch and the coil gets even tighter, "So close." I whine, looking down at him.

I hold eye contact with Chris, "Please can I come?" I ask, knowing if I'm not looking at him when I ask he'll deny me. Kinky fucker has a thing for eye contact, which I've grown to love.

He nods against me, letting his tongue flick circles on my clit, and I finally feel the coil within me start to snap. My mouth is dropped open in a silent moan when suddenly there's knocking at the door.

"Y/N? You good?" Matt calls through the door, making my heart drop. I try to shove Chris off me so I could answer but he won't budge.

"Y-Yeah, be out in a s-sec!" I yell back, praying he didn't pick up on anything weird as I finally release all over Chris' tongue. My legs begin to shake as I'm over stimulated from Chris' tongue lapping up my release, pressing a gentle kiss to my clit before he pulls away.

Chris shakes his head in disappointment, "Was gonna ask you to return the favor but I guess I'll wait." He huffs out playfully, sliding my skirt back on.

"How the fuck are we gonna leave the bathroom without getting caught?"

"Shit."

[shoku-and-awe]

Finally screwed up the courage to check out this tiny hole-in-the-wall mostly-locals place I've been eyeing for months, and not only was the food WONDERFUL, they were super nonchalant about my foreign intrusion AND, when I left and had to squeeze past this very gruff very butch older lady at the end of the counter, and I was doing that apologetic little sorry-bout-these-close-quarters bow, she just looked into my eyes (and at my haircut and my flannel probably) and went:

Oh MAN! I could spend all night trying to express how often I am read as straight and how sad it makes me and how often I need delicious gyoza and could maybe even make some kinda graph about these factors but! Suffice to say.

Ma'am... Thank you! I think am gonna live at least three years longer than I otherwise would've. Thank you for seeing me!

[lenathekiller]

Hi there!! I love your last Buggy fic and I was wondering if you could come up with something where Buggy has never slept with anyone before??? I love the thought of him being so cocky and scary with people but is secretly terrified because he’s so self conscious of his image?! Thank you in advance!!

Oooh I like this idea, sorry it's taken me a while to write it.

A/N: obviously this will be smut and I've decided to do afab!reader but if there's an interest I could write an amab!reader version at a later point.

Excuse any mistakes btw Im too tired proof read this time.

You sat in a small pub enjoying a few drinks before you'd set off on you next adventure. Admittedly the pub was rather dingy and had hardly any other patrons in it besides yourself. Honestly you were debating whether it'd be better to pay for your few drinks you'd had and go to a different pub to finish your drinking.

You'd been somewhat hoping to find someone at least somewhat attractive that you could drunkenly sleep with but it seemed like the longer you said in this shit hole of a place the less likely you were to be able to achieve that. Standing to leave you heard someone approach and speak to you.

"What's a flashy lil thing like yourself doing in a dumb of a place like this?" Standing there was a tall pirate in clown makeup, and man was he attractive. Sure he looked a little messed up, ya know like a man who's life was a little fucked up, but it made him all the more hot.

"I was just about to leave actually, considering you and me are the only 2 good looking people here, I'd say it's gonna be hard to find my next drunken fling if I stay here any longer." You finished off the remainder of your drink, moving past him to close out your tab.

He moved to follow you. "Aw, but I just got here. How bout you stay a few more minutes and I'll treat you to a few more drinks, my treat. After all it'd be such a shame for you to leave so soon sweetheart."

You eyed him up a bit, a smirk forming on your lips. "Alright but it better be worth my while or else you'll be leaving here with less bones intact."

"Oh trust me babe, no leaves my presence unsatisfied by The Great Buggy the Clown." He places a hand on your hip and guides you back to a secluded booth in the back, both of you sliding into the same booth.

After some introductions of yourselves to each other and you each other, you decided to just get to the main point already. "So what are you doing here handsome? I mean I've already basically admitted I'm here only to find someone to spend my last night here with, but what about you?"

"I just came for the booze, but then I saw you looking so lonely by yourself and I thought I should fix that. It's merely a benefit that you're looking for someone to occupy your time with." He says placing an arm around your shoulder.

"What makes you think I'd want to fuck you though? perhaps I'm just using you for free liquor before I go find someone to satisfy my desires and needs." Leaning into his side and up so your face was intimately close to his.

His free hand came up to cradle your chin as he moved his face closer till your lips barely touched. "You'd be an absolute idiot if you chose anyone other than me to satisfy you tonight."

Honestly his cocky confidence, the alcohol that was now hitting your system and all those past lonely months at sea with the desire to just find someone good-looking to fuck was all adding up to being fully ready to give yourself to this clown. You closed the miniscule distance and kissed him, he of course confidently kissed you back, a hand of his detaching to squeeze your upper thigh.

Before you two could get to caught up in anything you cut your kiss short, pulling back a bit to speak. "Let get out of here, this place is too gross for us to continue this here."

A small flash of panic flooded his eyes for a moment though he nodded, moving out of the booth helping you do the same. Guiding you towards the door with his arm somewhat around you, a hand resting on your ass, he threw some money on the counter to pay as you two walked out. Luckily you had been staying at a quaint little hotel a block down so the pair of you headed there, his hand still on your ass seeming to be kneading it somewhat with excitement.

As soon as you were in your room he'd pressed you to the closest wall, lips instantly on your neck with hands gripping your hips as he grinded his own against yours. He'd already grown quite the bulge in that short span of time from you leaving the pub till now. His movements were a little messy but you'd figured it was the alcohol and he was earning some moans from you regardless so what did it matter.

Taking your own hands you began to undress him as much as you could in that moment, throwing his hat and bandana to the side, undoing the shirt that was more like a vest he wore and sliding it and his large coat off his arms. Damn we're his arms toned, and his hair that now fell down his back in the loose braid he'd kept it in under the bandana was so soft as you tugged it a bit.

"God you really know how to rile a man up don't you sweetheart? You like pulling on my hair like that?" He groaned into your ear, making you shiver a bit.

"Just trying to encourage you to get to get on with the show mr. Clown." You teased, it obviously having an affect on him as he picked you up and laid you on the bed.

His hands were quick to undo your pants and slide them down your thighs, and since you'd been expecting to get some today you had opted out of wearing anything under them. Of course he teased you for it briefly before getting back to work. Planting a few lite bites and kisses on your thigh, before running his tongue along your folds.

He paused for far too long for your liking, though when you'd look to see what the hell was taking so long you'd seen his face twisted up a bit in an expression you really couldn't read right.

"oh God don't tell me I taste bad, or God maybe I smell bad." You'd panicked a bit, suddenly self-conscious at the state your nether region might be in. "I mean I bathed today but maybe i-"

He cut you off with a gentle hand running along your thigh comfortingly. "No, No! From that little bit I got you taste divine, it's just uh..." His face was turning red and he looked away embarrassed, it only fueling your thoughts to start running rampant again till he'd spoken again. "I've actually never been with anyone before. I don't want to fuck this up."

After the few seconds of shock wore off you started to laugh a bit. "You mean the great Buggy, who said it'd be an idiot if I slept with anyone besides you, has no experience at all?"

He looked somewhat hurt and defeated as he nodded. Clearly he was beyond embarrassed and nervous in this moment and you'd found it a bit cute. This tough looking pirate that talked a big game about his skills, and had a bounty on his head as well as all the rumors you'd heard of the damage he'd do to any town he'd dock in, was now kneeling inches away from your cunt admitting he had absolutely no experience at all.. Honestly it was making him look a bit pathetic, but damn did that turn you on.

You sat up a bit and cupped his cheek, a few tears had formed in his eyes as a result of his own mind worrying you'd laugh him out the room and tell everyone just how pathetic he was. He worked so hard to get himself this far and honestly it terrified him to have it all ruined by one bad encounter, or even worse he put on a bad performance when it counted the most right now.

"Buggy, please look at me." Breaking out of his thoughts and obeying your request he turned to meet your gaze, much more tender then he'd expected it to be. You rubbed your thumb along his cheek as you began to speak again. "I'm sorry I teased you. It's okay, honestly everyone is beyond nervous they're first time. I'm not bothered by you not having any experience, In fact I'm a little honored I'll be your first."

His eyes lit up at that. "Really?"

You smiled warmly at him. "Yea I can show you how best to please someone. Plus I'll have the satisfaction of knowing I was the first to sleep with The Fantastically Flash Buggy."

He laughed a bit at that and thanked you.

"Here give me your hand Bug." You guided his fingers to your clit, showing him the best way to stimulate it. "Mm rub gentle circle like this. Always remember it's a bundle of nerves not a door knob your trying to polish."

After guiding his fingers for a minute you'd let I'm try for himself, and damn he was learning quick. You had to fight moans as you began instructing him on how to finger next. Telling him it's not all about in and out movements or speed but more so about finding the spots that bring your partner the most pleasure.

"Sorry if I'm a little eager but can I try using my mouth more on you, I cant get that flavor of you I sampled earlier out my head." He had asked and you had to restrain yourself from practically shouting yes before he'd even finished speaking.

If he was already learning and figuring out all you'd taught him already was any kind of sign of what's to come, that what's to come would surely be you. You gave him a few tips but ultimately let him somewhat learn through experimenting.

He started out giving slow licks over your clit, swirling his tongue a bit over it, before moving down to tease your entrance. Earning plenty of moans and whimper in approval of his actions his tongue slowly slid into as far as it could go then back out. Buggy built up a rhythm of movements with his mouth, he was really starting to feel he was getting the hang of it till he had heard you mumble something bout his nose.

Halting his feasting he looked up at you. "What's wrong? Am I doing something wrong, is my nose bothering you?"

You should your head, panting a bit. "No, you're doing great, your nose was just starting to run against me and it was driving me crazy.. in a good way though!"

Buggy smiled and made a comment about how his big nose was good for something before he returned to feasting on you once more. He was dangerously good at this despite never having done this before, and he was quickly bringing you to the edge. Your hands tangled into his long blue locks, gently pushing and encouraging him to not stop his current actions.

"Mmm, Buggy~ don't stop please, I'm so close~" Your pleading moans only served to encourage him more, his nose rubbing against you a bit quicker as he ate you out with seemingly more hunger.

You came undone against his face, gripping tightly on his hair. Of course being the gentleman he was he licked you clean, savoring your taste and storing the memory of it away for later. Standing up, he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand as his other hand undid his pants.

"Would you like me to return the favor babe?" You asked, sitting up to help him free himself from his pants.

"No need, I desperately need to be inside you right now." He sat down on the bed, motioning you to straddle him.

Your own desperation to feel him fueling you to quickly hop on his lap facing him. You pressed your folds against his member grinding against it as you began to kiss him. Groans spilled from his mouth and into yours as you teased him, his hands gripping your waist with enough force that you were sure would leave bruised later.

Breaking away from the kiss you guided the head of his cock to your hole, slowly sliding down on it till his whole length was buried inside you. "Let me get us started, you just take notes and enjoy for a while."

He nodded, a groan rumbling from his throat as you began to move. You started with a slow pace so he could get use to the feeling of your walks around his dick without overwhelming him or causing him to bust too soon. He whined a bit, begging you to move faster, you obliged bouncing on him at a quicker pace that earned plenty of noises from both of you.

God was his dick good, sure you were doing the work but honestly you didn't mind if it meant being able to feel him inside you. He was hitting all the right spots and thanks to your pace he was hitting them with perfect timing.

He halted your hips with his hands, causing you to look confused at him. "Sorry I just can't hold back anymore, this feels too good." With that he flipped the pair of you over. Now you were on your back with him pressing your legs up to your chest with him kneeling between them. " I just really need to pound you into the mattress right now."

With that he started thrusting himself into you at a dangerously pleasureful pace. You couldn't help but practically scream out his name and strings of curses as he seamlessly hit your gspot with perfect precision and force.

"Fuck you feel so much better than anything I could have imagined. God your gonna practically milk the cum outta me sweetheart." Buggy groaned giving a few harsher thrusts as he spoke, never breaking the rhythm he had though.

It was growing increasingly clear that neither of you would be able to last must longer, though Buggy was determined to make you finish first as his hand slipped down play with your clit the exact way you'd taught him too earlier.

"Damn you learn quick Buggy." Your words brought a shit eating grin to his face. "I'm gonna~"

He silenced you with a passionate kiss, moans spilling between your mouths as you came undone, the feeling of you cumming around him caused him to follow you soon after.

After his hips had stopped and you'd both come down from your respective highs, Buggy laid down beside you quickly pulling you into his arms.

"I'm only gonna say this once, Thank you for not only being my first but also somewhat teaching me." Some embarrassment was evident in his tone but you figured it wasn't worth it to tease him about it after all he'd just done.

"Bit of a shame to know you'll use that knowledge to pleasure other people besides me now." You closed your eyes, growing tired from the day as well as the alcohol still running in your system.

You heard him choke a small bit. "Are you implying you're jealous at the thought of me being with anyone else now?"

"..night.." Sleep was taking you now and there was nothing that could be done about it.

"How dare you fall asleep without answering me!" He knew there was nothing he could do to stop it though as he heard you softly snoring against his chest. He sighed in defeat. "Good night sweetheart."

[world-of-aus]

All I'll Ever Need

Pairing: Bull Rider!Bucky x Reader

Warnings: None.

Author's Note: I've been in my cowboy, bullrider funk and I needed this out! I hope you all enjoy this piece, as always happy reading! Now back to my dark cave, I go.

It’s a high live event tonight, the grounds large enough for not only the main attraction bull riding, but the other rodeo sports being held this evening. You work your way through the crowd, the boy on your hip wiggling around in hopes to get higher to spot his father over the large crowd. You hike the brown haired, grey-eyed boy higher on your hip, the excitement coursing through his tiny body as you cross the arena grounds. Natasha and Wanda had texted you minutes prior after having parked the truck that they had just barely managed to secure the four of you good seats in the stands overlooking the ground.

Squeezing your way through the masses your feet meet the stands wooden stairs, you climb them carefully till your standing on the landing looking left then right as you look for your group. “Look!” Your attention is directed by the six-year-old over to the farthest corner on the right, Wanda and Natasha waving at the two of you wildly with their hats, Bucky standing tall behind them on the iron gates.

Grant snatches the hat that matches his dad’s off his head, waving it around just as wildly as his aunts. A sharp whistle pierces the air the boy’s eyes snapping past the awaiting women to the matching pair of cerulean blue waiting for him, how he hadn’t seen his father yet surprises you, but the boy becomes a bucking bronco in your hold till you’re releasing him from your grip. His form slips from your body as he runs through the stands to where his father awaits perched.

You chase after him, excusing yourself past the other patrons already in their seats. Natasha waits for the tiny brunette who is feet ahead of you with open arms, his body falling into his aunts hold as she hoists him high, his hat surpassing the both of them as he lets out a squeal of joy. He reaches for his father next, who takes him in even stronger arms squeezing his son to his broad chest.

You nearly falter in your steps at the sight, your heart racing, body warming at the sight before you. The bond the two shared was unlike any other you had experienced. Bucky Barnes had a hard time believing he could be the father his son needed when his mother just up and left two months into Grants first year of life, but he had proven himself wrong time and time again. There’s amazement in Grants eyes and love in Buckys as he explains to his son all about the ongoing events.

You close the distance saddling up next to Natasha as you hear Bucky’s promise to Grant to take him riding for the first time this week that he had off. “I’m all your’s bud, whaddya say? Uncle Steve and Sam can help too, aunt Wanda and Natasha can bring your favorite snacks.”

“Can y/n come too daddy, can she!” Bucky’s eyes find yours, pink lips curling into a breathtaking smile. “Of course she can bud,” he replies eyes never leaving yours, “that’s of course if she wants, think she might need a break from us boys bud, you’ve get her chasing you all day.”

Your lips curl in return, “I haven’t missed one of his firsts yet Barnes, don’t plan on doing so anytime soon. You can count me in, besides there’s no one I love to chase more.” A squeal of joy erupts from the smaller long-haired brunette and you’re just barely moving forward to catch his form as he jumps at you, his hat knocking yours clean off your head. Small but mighty arms wrap around your neck, his round cheeks smushing against yours as he thanks you profusely, promising you bouts of fun. Bouts of fun that you knew no matter what would be delivered. You’d spend the rest of your days with the Barnes boys if life itself allowed it.

The world melts away in the hug, your focus solely on the boy in your arms as you squeeze him just as tightly to you. “You going to show your dad how it’s done, how the real cowboys ride?” you question in a teasing tone as you pull back to look at the boy. The excitement he lets out draws a laugh from your group, “he’s going to be a hell of a lot better than I am that’s for sure.” Bucky chuckles, your eyes find his, “If he is, it’s only because he has a pretty awesome father to thank, give yourself credit B, you’re doing an amazing job with little man here.”

You don’t think you’ll ever tire catching the moments Bucky goes bashful under your gaze, the only sign that the man before you could feel the same, well as for what your friend's turned family all say. The brunette goes to reply but Steve is calling for him over his shoulder; his turn was coming around. You wave at the bearded dirty-blonde, grant following suit the hat coming too as he waves it around. You move forward into Bucky’s space to say your goodbye’s, grants arms going around his father as he gives him a tight squeeze. When the two pull away you fall in next, your arm that isn’t holding grant going around Bucky’s back, “you better be safe out there B,” you murmur into his ear, “you’ve got a little one that’s going to be watching your every move.” His chuckle rumbles deep within his chest, fingers curling tighter into your skin as he squeezes you much like his son, “is he the only one that’s going to be watching me ride tonight?”

The pinch you deliver to Bucky’s back has the broad-shouldered brunette pulling back that same chuckle bubbling out of his chest this time. “don’t be a smart-ass B, I’m being serious be safe out there.” His hand finds yours fingers curling with your own, lips meeting your intertwined fingers, “riding bulls is in my blood sweetheart you know I’ll be careful.”

“James Buchanan Barnes I’m being serious.”

His grin is heart melting as he pulls you and Grant back in, squeezing the two of you before placing a kiss to the side of your head. “I promise, I’m coming out of those gates to you.” His words stall your heart, but you tell yourself he’s not coming for you, he’s coming for the son you hold, his boy, his whole world. You let him go with Grant yelling for his dad to be careful, Bucky sends him a wave over his shoulder as he moves over to the gates Steve and Sam wait for him by. You take your seat between Natasha and Wanda settling Grant on your legs as you let him watch the current rider burst through the farthest Gate. Grant is lost in the show, his eyes bright as he watches the rider hold strong to the bull.

“Don’t know how much more proof you need.” Your eyes flit over to the blonde sitting next to you, “proof?” you question. A smile pulls at the corners of her mouth, “yeah, proof to see that that man by those gates is just as taken with you as you are with him.” You snort eyes gliding over to said man that stands at the farthest bucking chute awaiting his turn. There’s a snorting angry bull just below him, but his eyes are on you, your retort gets stuck on your tongue. Steve’s passing him his protective headgear an exchange for the hat he wore on his head. He sends you a final wink before placing the helmet on and falling over the bull who only bucks harder with his added weight.

Your heart races away in your chest as you watch him get into position, one hand going just above his head as the other laces its way around the rope tied to the bull. A buzzer goes off somewhere in the air, the gate slams open the bull racing out. Grants high on his feet as he watches his dad, fingers curled around the railing as he watches. You didn’t even notice the boy crawl off your lap your own breath caught in your throat as you watch that bull buck for his life to get Bucky off of him. Just 8 seconds you think as you push to your feet standing behind grant, just 8 seconds, hold on, hold on, hold on....

The air is electric as the buzzer goes off, patrons flying from seats to cheer Bucky on just as he falls from the bull, the clowns running in to get him out. Grant can hardly wait to get to his father once he’s getting out of the main arena. He’s grabbing your hand pulling, barely giving you a chance to tell the girls where you’re going, though they already know.

You follow the brown-haired boy as he tugs your through the stands, getting you two down on the ground before racing his way to where he knows he’ll find his dad and uncles. The crowd on the dirt ground clears, Grant seeing Bucky ways ahead laughing with his uncles. His hand falls away from yours the boy barreling with all his might towards the three men his fathers names falling from his lips to grab his attention. The three men turn to the barreling boy, Bucky moving forward to meet his boy halfway.

You slow your steps watching the two reunite Bucky lifting Grant in the air as he pulls his son in. Natasha and Wanda catch up to you, linking their arms with yours as they pull you forward. Steve and Sam move also, your group, your family moving closer as you close the distance. Hugs are shared as you finally greet Sam and Steve, “good to see you sweetheart!” Steve greets as he pulls you in for a hug

You pinch Steve in the ribs as if you hadn’t seen him earlier in the morning when you went to help Bucky with a still sleeping Grant. “You saw me this morning Steve,” you laugh, “it’s good to see you too though.”

“Move it over Rogers, favorite coming through,” Sam says as he pulls the bearded blonde coming in for a hug of his own. A wet kiss is pressed to your cheek, “Sammy,” you breathe squeezing the man just as tight, “always so good to see you!” Sam's grinning, "see," he tells the group, "favorite." Wanda moves in when you pull away her lips finding Sam's, "everyone knows Grant is y/n's favorite," she laughs as she pulls away, "but you're mine." Your group coo's at the two, Steve holding Nat under his arm, Sam holding Wanda, "Grant's not the only Barnes that y/n favors," Natasha grins.

You want to roll your eyes at her attempt, but the strong arm falling over your shoulder has you biting your tongue. You look over at the bearded brunette who's already looking right back at you, holding the bright boy who holds your heart, "good thing she's our favorite too." You could out yourself now to the man holding you protectively under his arm but you bite your tongue instead leaning further into his touch. His lips find the side of your head, "we should go catch the rest of the rides," Steve mentions, "we've gotta go check the trailers locked though," Bucky answers.

"Why don't you and y/n go check," Natasha offers, already moving forward to grab Grant, "we'll stop at the concessions first, save y’all a seat." They leave you no space for argument as Natasha urges your group to go, "see you in a bit," she calls over her shoulder, "take all the time you need!"

You inwardly groan at their antics, Bucky chuckles pulling you with him, "C'mon sweetheart, let's go check that trailer." You let him whisk you along the arena grounds, the feeling of being under his arm all consuming, it felt right, it felt like the two of you belonged, though there was never a moment in the years that you've know Bucky that being with him didn't feel right.

Then why couldn't it have been you?

Why her?

"You know," Bucky starts suddenly as he turns you towards the lot that holds the trailers, "you really are our favorite." You glance up at him smile on your lips as you continue to walk further into the lot, "that so B?"

He nods, the corner of his mouth ticking up in a smile, "how could you not be," he answers, "know you almost my whole life, you've stuck with me through it all even those moments you didn't need to, seen me at my worst and never thought to hell with this and walked away from me because nothing was tying you to me. If anything you grabbed my hand held tight and dragged me from the fire and Grant, god with Grant - I - I could never express how grateful I am for you, you took up a responsibility you didn't ask for, helped me raise a boy that wasn't yours. You never gave up on us."

You're glad you've come up to his trailer because his words have you halting in your step, your body stopping his from going any further. You turn to face him, "And I would do it all over if I had to," you respond with conviction, "you, Grant, you both mean the world to me. There's nothing you could ask of me that I wouldn't do for you. For either of you. You've been my best friend for years, stood with me as well when I needed you." He shakes his head the two of you knowing that statement isn't all true especially when Dolores had been in the picture, but you couldn't bring yourself to blame him, not now, not then. He was in love, and he thought she was too. He thought she was the one, you all did.

"I could have been better to you, after all you've done for me, for us."

You're shaking your head in return, your hand coming up to rest against his stubbled cheek. An act you've done before that feels so different now. "You were what I needed when I needed you to be B, I was in no position to ask more of you. All I knew was that when the time came I wanted to return that favor, I wanted to be what you needed." It falls silent between the two of you, eyes locked on one another in a gaze that you aren't sure you'd ever say Bucky Barnes would look at you with.

Strong warm hands come up to cup your cheeks, your breath is stolen in a moment. "Sweetheart - you're all I ever needed, I just didn't think I deserved someone like you, but the more time I spend with you, the more time I see you with Grant - I want to be that someone, I don't want to waste anymore time just being your friend."

You've lost count of how often Bucky has left you speechless, so you do what you've only ever dreamed of doing. Curling your fingers into the lapels of his shirt, you tug him closer, your lips finding his in an all-consuming kiss.

You didn't want to waste any more time either.