#I've got like 30 wips and I've only finished ONE

[clownbutlerdotcom]

Me: Procrastinating my current fic by scrolling through pinterest

Me: finds new fanfic inspo

Brain: we should work on that

Me: no we're supposed to be working on this fic

Brain: but what if we started a new one tho...

Me: no we need to be smart, we won't finish it just like all our other w.i.p's

Brain: but what if tho

Me: no

Brain:........but what if

Me: inconsolable screaming

[celestie0]

gojo satoru x reader | oneshot angst [18+]

title. let me be free of you

He would live in this lifetime of hell over and over again if it meant that in some other one, there exists a world where he never hurts you.

ᰔ pairing. friends to strangers au - best friend!gojo x reader (f)

ᰔ summary. gojo satoru, your love of a lifetime, tells you he’s engaged to another woman. inspired by the novel & netflix series “one day” created by david nicholls

ᰔ warnings/tags. 18+, fem!reader, angst, mentions of sex/explicit content, coming of age themes, reader & gojo are in their 30s, mentions of pregnancy, mentions of alcohol, cheating, lots of mutual pining & longing, bittersweet ending

ᰔ word count. 4.8k

a/n. hellooo! i've had this finished in my wips folder for a long time but never got around to posting it sooo just wanted to let it see the light of day haha. hope you enjoyyy <33

➸ masterlist

“I’m engaged.”

The words leave Gojo’s lips as much less of a confession and more like a blabber, like a toddler desperate to keep conversation going in the face of a disinterested adult. Wasn’t how he expected to share the news of a lifetime to the love of his lifetime, but he hopes it breaks your heart to hear it. 

He watches your eyebrows flatten from the crease that was bothering them before, and then slowly raise into soft arches above your eyes–those damn beautiful eyes that, even when they twinkle with hurt, still make his heart skip a beat in his chest.

He recalls for a moment the night the two of you met, drunk and dizzy from drinking out of a shared bottle of Prosecco, which only had half of the liquor left in it to start when he had first found it bleeding out to dry on the grassy lawn at the front of your university. It was graduation night, the last day to celebrate finishing four years of hell, and he had nothing to his name other than a rolled up diploma shoved in the pocket of his suit pants and the charm left in the youth of his smile. He wanted to spend the night with Aiko Rei, which was not a unique desire as most men on campus did, and he had a fair shot of getting into bed with her just like all those times before. But instead he was sitting at the top of a staircase inside the campus’s English literature building, making history in the crisp year of 1986 by being the first man of the robust age of twenty-three to pass up sex with the school’s lady heartthrob for–well, conversation with a sort of ditsy girl that he just met a half hour ago.

“What do you plan to do with your life?” he heard you ask him, a hard enough question to stomach when one is sober, and an impossible question to stomach when one is already trying not to puke flat Prosecco.

“Pardon?” he asked, in hopes to dissuade you from the question. In hopes that you’d get the hint. But you don’t. And he’d soon learn throughout the years of your friendship to come that you never did.

“Your life!” you exclaim, “we’re graduates now! What do you want to do with it?” You pat harshly at his thigh, closer to his groin than to his pocket, most likely because you’re tipsy too, but he realizes you’re referring to the rolled up paper protruding at the pocket. 

Truthfully, Gojo had never thought much about what he wanted to do after graduation. Hell, he didn’t even think he’d make it this far. Not once since he got here, not once since he flunked out of first-year history, not once since his father passed away during his third-year final examinations, and most certainly not after he got caught having “unethical affairs” with his communications professor just two months ago. And yet the esteemed board of scholars decided he was fit for a diploma anyway, and now he’s answering to, effectively, a stranger what he plans to do with said piece of paper.

“I don’t know,” he says to you, “I’ll do whatever.” 

Gojo Satoru could get by with doing whatever. He was good at everything he did. But his teachers and mentors and his own father would always warn him– son, it’s better to be an expert at one than a half-assed show-off in all. Well, they wouldn’t use the expletives, but that’s what it had sounded like in his head.

His dad would’ve liked you. He was always telling him to find a girl that challenges him, asks him the right questions, and pushes him to become a better man, the kind of woman his mother was to his father. Much opposed to the airheaded girls of Gojo’s college campus he would sneak into the house and forget to shoo off before sunrise, an occurrence that happened enough times for the respect in his father’s eyes to dwindle with each woman he’d watch his son dispel from their residence. Until eventually, Gojo started paying rent as punishment.

So, twenty-three year old Gojo, what do you plan to do with your life? Or do you have no idea of anything that extends beyond where you are right now, sitting across this strange girl you’ve just met on the death of your educational youth, at the top of a stairwell lined with passed out, drunk newly grads at nearly 4 in the morning? Right now, he’s eyeing the hem of your dress, the way it’s ridden up slightly but the mesh overskirt still tickles the skin of your thigh. He’s certainly able to picture what’s beyond that fabric, and maybe imagine the color of your panties, but what’s to come for his life? No. As previously mentioned, he never thought he’d get this far.

Gojo is thirty-four now, eleven years since that night the two of you met. And he sits next to you on a garden bench under a pitch black sky with stars speckled across, but only dimly visible. 

It’s been years since he’s seen you. You two had a “falling out” at the cusp of thirty, almost a decade of friendship fizzled away, because of his selfish actions. He couldn’t let you go, but he couldn’t want you the way you wanted him either. He didn’t feel like he deserved to have you. You were too good for him, and he knew it. So he wasted a decade chasing after other women, and in return, he lost the one he knew he was supposed to spend the rest of his life with.

It’s the night of your college roommate‘s wedding, all gathered here today to celebrate their love, and he knew he’d run into you here. You were the bride’s maiden of honor, and you looked beautiful. With your hair half tied up, a pretty clip twinkling with every movement of your head, and with strands falling down over the smooth curve of your neck, bare skin of your chest tightly covered by the nude fabric of your dress. He was fully lusting after you, and he has been all night, the picture of beauty and grace, and it was wrong. Because, again, he’s–

“You’re engaged?” you finally break through his thoughts, break through the trance that he was lost in by the sea of your eyes. Forever pulling him in like you were a wicked siren for his soul, when all you’ve ever wanted from him was his love.

He shifts a little, the thick fabric of his navy blue suit stretching with the movement as he fidgets with his hands in his lap. He’s sitting close to you, his shoulder brushing against yours, the contrast of his broad masculinity so evident against the feminine curve of your bare arm, the thin strap holding up your dress threatening to fall down the hill. His thumb twitches, because he wants to pull it back up into place for you like a gentleman, but he’s not sure if that’s what his hand would actually do. Because all he really wants to do is peel the dress off of you. 

“Yes,” he says, still tantalized by the glow of your skin under pale moonlight, “engaged.”

“To be married?”

“Well, what other kind of engaged is there?”

“You’re not allowed to get married.”

He snorts. “Says who?”

“Says me!” you exclaim, sitting up straighter, "I turn my back for one moment, and you've gone an got engaged? You're awful!" The strap of your dress falls down over your shoulder, his eyes immediately darting to it. He sees you pull the strap up back into place, and a flit of his eyes to your face reveals to him the slight dusting of an embarrassed pink to your cheeks. 

There’s a silence that settles between the two of you. Distant commotion is heard, likely from the wedding venue as people engage in reception activities and dances and cheers, while the two of you remain in this garden escape, the wall of primly trimmed bushes sheltering you two from having to pretend to be people you’re not amongst a crowd.

“Aiko…” he hears you say beside him, and although the name of the woman that has rolled off your tongue is the name of the woman he’s supposed to love, it only makes him feel sick to his stomach to hear you say her name. “She seems lovely.”

“She is,” is all he can manage to say. And he also knows this seemingly lovely woman is probably drunk off her face back at the reception hall, giggling at all the men that approach her from the sight of her flushed face, and he should feel some sort of jealousy or possessiveness over that, but he can’t seem to muster any. Unlike the grit he had to his jaw an hour ago when he saw you dancing with a man he heard you introduce to your friends as just an “old friend” of yours from college. He felt more anger in that moment than he’d ever felt watching his soon-to-be-wife getting talked up to by the sleazy men twice her age. 

“She must be very rich,” you say. “She looks it.”

“Oh. Yeah. Her family’s very well off,” Gojo says.

“So will you become rich too?” you ask him, “when you marry her.”

His eyes flit to the sky briefly. “Doubt it.”

“How come?”

“The old man doesn’t like me very much. I imagine he’ll cut ties after the wedding.”

“Her father?”

“Yes.”

“And why is that?”

“Well. I guess it’s not every father’s dream to find out his prim and proper daughter’s been knocked up by the good-for-nothing boyfriend he’s been threatening her to say good riddance to for months now.”

The silence finds the two of you again, but this time haunting and gutting. That was a blabber, if anything. So nonchalantly said, with no emotion or spirit, to the one person in this world who he’s always felt like he can be himself around.

“She’s pregnant?” you say beside him, voice breaking slightly at the end, and he can’t bear to look at you for some reason. Some sort of admission of guilt, but what for? What exactly was he repenting for?

He lets out a small laugh, like the absurdity of the situation finds him all the same. “Yeah.” 

“That–” you start, stiff next to him, before he feels the tension relax but only rigidly, “that’s wonderful, Satoru. I’m–...I’m really happy for you.” You turn your torso to wrap your arms around him, and his lips brush the sweet skin on your forehead as you bury your face in the crook of his neck. He wraps one arm around you, a sort of friendly hug as he rubs the skin of your arm soothingly, and his heart aches from the emptiness when you release him. 

“Wow…” you say, looking up at him with pretty eyes, eyelashes fluttering as you blink rapidly to process the information, and he wonders if you really are happy for him. He doesn’t want you to be. He wants you to be furious, to tell him off for getting another woman pregnant after leading you on for so many years, maybe he wants you to slap him, or grab him by the collar of his shirt and shake him until all he sees is a million of you through dizzy vision like some paradise. He wants you to be mad, because it’d mean that you still care. It’d mean that you still think there’s something here to salvage between the two of you. 

But he’s engaged. And he’s having a baby. What was more final than that?

“So…are you marrying her because of–”

“The wedding is in four weeks,” he cuts you off, but he knows the statement answers your question regardless.

“Satoru…”

He leans off to the side a little to reach into the pocket of his suit pants, and he pulls out what is now a slightly bent envelope and he hands it to you. You take it from him gently, holding it weakly like it was something beyond you. Like something distant and foreign and strange. When all it was, is a wedding invitation. 

“Listen…” he starts.

He sees your eyes dazed as you stare at the lettering on the outside of the envelope.

“We’ve been friends for a long time, y/n. And I know the last time we saw each other was–” Hostile. Angry. Disappointing. Ended with you cussing him out on the street and then saying you never want to see him again. “...not ideal, but I still care a lot about you, and, uh, so, it would mean a lot to me if you came to the wedding.” For fucks sake, even on the brink of losing you forever, he still can’t find the right words to say. “Aiko, she–” He tastes bitter in his mouth, “well, I’ve told her a lot about you, and she’d really love it if you came as well.”

You’re silent as you gently peel back the opening of the letter and then pull out the small card stock invitation. The gold printed letters shine as you inspect it, fingers tracing the patterns of words that profess the Rei family’s intent to wed their daughter to Gojo Satoru. Your Gojo Satoru. Your best friend in this whole wide world. He watches your eyes carefully, but he can’t discern what he finds in them.

“Gojo Satoru…” you drone off, “to be wed. And to be a father.” Years of late night talks of the future, of kids and Christmas and love, with reality seemingly sly on the horizon only to have crept up so abruptly. It was pinched between your fingers right now. That reality.

His shoulders sulk slightly. And when you look up at him again, there’s a sheen of tears in your eyes.

“I can’t come to this,” you whisper, “and you know that, Satoru.”

His heart breaks. A physical pain that twists in his chest so tight at just the sight of seeing you sad. Sad again over the actions of his own. They say you always hurt the one you love, and he had always wondered what sort of evil person would do such a thing, only to find out he’s only ever hurt you this entire time. 

He should’ve kissed you that night the two of you met at graduation. Should’ve shut you up and all your existential questions by pinning you to a wall and pressing his lips against yours. He should’ve taken you to bed and fucked you, and then held you in his arms until you woke up in the morning. Should’ve listened to you talk his ear off about how he’s just like all the other guys, who pretend to care, but only want to have sex and then never to speak to the girl ever again. And he should’ve laid there in bed, nose nuzzled in your hair, taking all the scolding despite having no intent to ever leave you.

Instead, he wasted so much time. Sure, he had your friendship. His best friend for years, but the two of you could’ve been something more. Could’ve spent the years together, instead of writing stained letters or leaving messages on answering machines while the two of you were miles away. He could’ve been waking up with you every morning with the scent of your shampoo on his sheets, instead of clinging to pillows in foreign motel rooms. He could’ve been engaged to you, and he could be whispering sweet nothings in your ear of how much he wishes the baby will have your eyes. 

But his thoughts are lost in fantasy. He is what he’s done, nothing more and nothing less. His eyes fall to your lap, the invitation still held loosely in your hand, and then a droplet of water falls onto it.

“I–” you stutter, wiping at the tears spilling down your cheeks with a hesitant swipe of your hand, “I need to go.”

You stand up off the bench and he quickly stands up with you, grabbing your wrist to keep you here with him, and you halt but only with you facing away from him. He yanks at your wrist harshly, pulling you into him so his chest is flush to your back, his arms wrapping strongly around you and his nose nuzzling into your hair, breathing you in greedily like it’s the last time he’ll ever get the chance.

“Satoru–” you gasp, your hands immediately grabbing at his forearms that are tightly crossed across your collarbone. “What are you doing–” 

“Say it,” he whispers, gruff and impatient, “tell me to do it, and I will.”

“T-Tell you to do what?” you stutter, struggling a little in his hold but he only holds you tighter.

“Tell me to leave her, and I will,” he says, his lips brushing at your ear now, the scent of your perfume maddening to his senses, and one of his hands slowly trails down and the knuckle of his thumb presses into the softness of your breast.

You squirm, a small and soft moan leaving your lips.

“T–” you breathe in harshly, “this is wrong.” 

“I don’t care,” he growls, arms sliding lower to hold you under your breasts, so tightly that your heels lift off the ground. “Just say the word, and I’ll leave everything behind for you. I promise,” he breathes in deep, the desperation making his head hazy, “that I’ll do things right this time. Just you and me–” 

“You’re going to be a father,” you remind him, and he shuts his eyes closed tightly, the responsibility of the word bearing on his shoulders but his desire for you overshadows every shred of sense or dignity or integrity he has left in him, because he felt like he was losing his mind after wanting you for years just to never have you. 

He turns you around in his hold so that you face him, and he crashes his lips to yours, muffling the surprised mmf! that dies in your throat in surprise as his hands hold your waist, relishing in the feeling of satin fabric pulled taut over your curves.

Forbidden, yet a taste that he’ll risk because there was no curse that was worse than the fate of having to pine after you for years.

Ah.

But.

But it was all fantasy, this moment in his head, where he takes you on the freshly cut grass of this garden. 

Something that only briefly flashes through his mind as his warm hand wraps around your wrist, from where he was still seated on the stone bench, and not on his feet holding you like he dreamed for. Like he longed for.

He feels the weight of his arm so heavily, as if it weren’t his own, and he slowly lets go of your wrist.

When he looks up at you, there’s longing in your eyes. A hurt that he didn’t even know he was capable of causing, just for him to realize that you’ve always looked at him that way, and he’s never been keen enough to know it until now. He grew up too late. He took too long.

His phone starts buzzing in his pocket, and he reaches in for it, then flips it open and sees his soon-to-be-wife’s name on it. He feels nothing at the sight.

“Hello?” he speaks into the device when he holds it to his ear, and he sees you take a couple steps away, rubbing anxiously at your elbow as you pretend to busy yourself with the study of the lamp. “Yes, I’ll be there soon. I, uh, I’m just with a friend. A couple of friends, actually. We’re having drinks by the pond. Mhm. Yes. I will. Okay, see you soon. I—…I love you too. Bye.” And then he snaps the phone shut. 

“Heading back?” he hears you ask.

He stands. “I’ve got to.”

“Okay.” 

You two walk down the shrubbery of the garden that was arranged like a maze, him a few paces behind you, and he watches the delicate line of your posture as your hand brushes against the green walls of foliage that encase the two of you, the feeling of wanting to touch you and hold you almost suffocating. 

“Hey,” he calls out to you, and he shoves his hands in his suit pockets. You turn around immediately to face him, like his voice was permission to do so.

“Yes?” you ask.

He blinks up at the starry sky, and then looks at you again. The soft cast of distant warm lighting falls over your face, making you appear like a renaissance painting, similar to those that you would point out to him at museums when you two would see each other on holiday back in your early twenties. He could never understand the charm of those paintings, no matter how many times you tried to explain it to him, but seeing you in this light right now, he finally understands the beauty that you saw. 

“I’m, uh,” he rubs at the back of his neck, and then scoffs out a small laugh, “I’m a little drunk right now, but–” He stops himself. What was he trying to say? And was it of conscious mind? “I just need to tell you that…I really regret…not speaking to you. I mean, for letting the silence drag on for years. You’re my–...my best friend. We’re a pair, you know? The two of us. For years, people would ask me where you were. And why they haven’t seen us together at all recently. And it was hard to admit that we hadn’t spoken in years.”

You take the smallest of steps towards him, and look up at him with empty eyes. 

“What I’m trying to say is, is that, well,” he finds himself tripping over his words, “I miss you. And I miss our friendship. And–...I miss having you around.” He glances down at his shoes, polished and reflecting off the moonlight directly above him. He rocks back and forth on his heels ever so slightly. “I know you said that I piss you off to lengths unimaginable to my tiny pea-sized brain, but I can’t help myself, y/n,” he admits, “I think you and I, we’re just meant to always be. In some how, or some way…”

You purse your lips together, gaze shifting lower to eye at the silk of his tie. 

“Can we be friends again?” he asks, the words feeling juvenile on his tongue. Like whispered apologies between children on a playground after shoving one another onto wooden chips, except the wounds he’s left on you run much deeper than a superficial scrape. 

You blink slowly, tilting your head up at him. “Friends?”

“Friends.”

You wipe your palm off on the satin of your dress. “I missed you too, you know.”

His eyes widened slightly.

Your hand finds its way up your arm, until you weakly cup your elbow with your palm and look off to the side, avoiding eye contact with him. “There were so many years where I thought that there was something between us. And maybe I was foolish for thinking that way, that you would ever see me that way–”

“y/n,” he tries to interrupt you. 

“But…the pain of not having you the way I wanted to was much less worse than the pain of not having you at all,” you say, your gaze finally shifting towards him. “But, the thing is, I needed to feel that pain to get over you. I had to.”

His heart stills at those words.

You glance down at the ground now. “I missed being able to tell you things. To laugh, and cry, and argue. I miss humbling your stupid ego. I miss being able to call you at any time, knowing you’d pick up when I needed you.”

His heart aches so much he wants to reach into his chest and hold it.

“The thing is,” you continue, “you would’ve been the first person I would’ve run to to tell them that I lost my best friend.” There were tears shining in your eyes. “But what could I do when you were the one that I had lost? Who could I have turned to then?”

He lets out a shaky breath, and in a swift motion, his arm wraps around your waist and he pulls you to him in an embrace.

You’re stiff in his hold, mechanical and rigid, so contrary to the soft tears you leave behind on the fabric of his sleeve, but slowly and surely, you warm and thaw. Your hands slide up past his shoulders, linking behind his neck. And his head drops to the curve of your neck, swaying you with him slowly as if it were a first dance.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, “for hurting you.”

You breathe out slowly. “Just let me go, Satoru. Let me be free. Let me be free of you.”

He feels the air knock out of his lungs, and the two of you slowly pull your heads away from the embrace to look at one another, although your hands still find a place on his shoulders, and he still holds you close to him by a delicate hold of your waist. 

He wonders if in another life, you two were happy. He wonders if he could ever take back all the decisions he made, and start all over again. On that day the two of you met on that staircase in the west wing of the literature building, he would make a different choice. If he could, he would live in this lifetime of hell over and over again if it meant that in some other one, there exists a world where he never hurts you. 

“It’s time for me to go,” you whisper, eyes darting across the features of his face, studying them but with a familiarity that only you know, because you held his entire life in your palm. Your gaze meets his again, faces just inches apart, and the sweet curl of your eyelashes makes him weak in the knees. “It’s time.”

He nods slowly, his own eyes studying your face as well, except it looks foreign to him now. 

It’s all been said and done. There was nothing he could do to right the wrongs, or undo all the pain. He was to be a father now, and his duties were now towards his wife and unborn child. And no longer to the woman he holds in his arms, one he’s sure he will never stop loving for as long as he lives. 

It’s a sweet moment, the two of you gazing at one another. You look so pretty from this angle, looking up at him with the smallest tilt to your head and round searching eyes. His head subconsciously dips down towards yours in the second that he glances at your lips, but he stops himself. And when you make no move to create distance, he finds himself closing it again, until his lips brush against yours ever so softly. And then he captures them in a kiss, firm and unmistaken, finding solace in the way your lips move against his too, unsure yet passionately at the same time. Your fingers ever so slightly dig into his shoulders while his thumbs soothe at the skin of your waist, the two of you savoring the last moments of a kiss that’ll be the sweetest one you’ll ever know.

You pull away first, a small puff of air leaving your lips as you glance downwards. He rests his forehead against yours, never once looking away from your face. And you both breathe slowly, the soul of the chaste kiss entirely vanishing into the air along with all the hope that the two of you had left to make anything of the way you feel about one another. It was a kiss that almost disqualified any level of sin or guilt or wrong, because it was like one you two owed each other, after years of familiarity and longing. It was the goodbye that the two of you deserved.

His hands slowly let go of your waist, and he takes a step back away from you, softly clearing his throat. The distance feels like a galaxy away, and he briefly runs his thumb along his bottom lip, because the ghostly feeling of your lips on his still remains. 

“Shall we head back?” you ask him, prim and proper in posture and eyes widened in a formal gaze.

His lips are parted, and he finds that he’s panting slightly. And then he slowly nods his head. “Yes.”

.

.

.

[the end] 

a/n. i am sooooo freaking obsessed w "one day" by david nicholls and really wanted to write something inspired by it!! the book literally ripped my heart out and stomped on it like there were so many scenes where i just longingly stared out the window because of how shattering it was but dear god i really enjoyed it, and the show was also so dfkjhsfkhs i had sm feels watching it. so yea this was fun to write!! i hope you enjoyedd n thanks so much for reading :)

➸ masterlist

[bamsara]

A03 Questions Tag Game

I got tagged by: @kagedbird I tag: @onethirdofimpossible, @coffincrows, (first two that come to mind) and anyone else who wants to do the game

1 – How many works do you have on AO3?

At the time of writing this post, currently 30 fics. (Not including any fics or written works that are not posted to AO3)

2 – What's your total AO3 word count?

1,066,633

3 – What fandoms do you write for?

Formerly: Don't Starve, FNAF, Dragons Dogma, Invader Zim

Currently: Cult of the Lamb

4 – What are your top five fics by kudos?

Solar Lunacy, Celestial Omens, Bytes of Lunacy, The Rehabilitation of Death, Saturday Insomnia

5 – Do you respond to comments?

I try to but I also get very nervous responding because I often don't know what to say back and I feel like it's almost rude or disrespectful to respond to a comment, esp the very nice ones that are long and in-deph with just a keysmash or a bunch of emojis, but I do read every single one since I have email notifications on for them

I'd like to sit down and respond to many but I really don't want to make it awkward so pls dear god readers forgive me

6 – What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't like unhappy endings. I enjoy angsty stories but I like when it's at least ending happy to me

7 – What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Not posted? Solar Lunacy

Ongoing? TROD

8 – Do you get hate on fics?

Not really? Most adults (in my experience) know the 'don't like don't read' rule and know basic online etiquette. I've gotten some for discontinuing a fic or switching fandoms though

9 – Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I don't write or draw NSFW! I like to make some suggestive themes sometimes, but I'm a very ace person, it's not something I do often. (I do have a current running goal that if my friend reaches their donation goal for their medical bills that I would give NSFW a shot, but again its not really my cup of tea)

10 – Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Nah I haven't written any cross overs, but I do draw them sometimes. Recently I've been spinning a Alice in Wonderland x COTL crossover in my head.

11 – Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yep. I've had people copy and paste my work, go in with a thesaurus to change a few words (like changing 'angry' to mad, 'upset' to 'sad', and so forth) to try and avoid detection and re-posted my written work under a different title name. AO3 staff took them down for violating their policy against plagiarism though

12 – Have you ever had a fic translated?

No. I wouldn't mind it so as long as I'm asked before hand, though not on anon so I can actually work with the person to prevent any mistranslations or mishandling, and that I don't want my work posted to other websites

13 – Have you ever co-written a fic?

I think I did when I was a teen but I cannot remember now

14 – What's your all-time favorite ship?

Eh I don't have any favorites, just ones I really focus on for a long while

15 – What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Pass.

16 – What are your writing strengths?

I can sit down for hours or several days and work on a writing wip completely in the zone. I cant do it on command but its at least something I can do

17 – What are your writing weaknesses?

Spelling and grammar, and sometimes long running sentences. I just kinda write, theres not really a goal for it to be perfect though so as long as the story gist and vibe is right, im fine with it

18 – Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I've done it before but only minor, had a friend help me with it (one or two lines of dialogue) Aside from that, I'm not comfortably fluent enough in anything to do it again without assistance

19 – First fandom you wrote for?

Soul Eater, when I was wayyy too young to be posting anything on the internet. My fanfics I wrote are still on fanfic.net to this day

20 – Favorite fic you've written?

It's inbetween TROD and EE&E right now

[novemberthewriter]

WRITEBLR INTRO xx

hey, all! i’m n.k. :-)

i'm not new to tumblr (have had a few diff accounts since 2011/2012), but i'm new to interacting with writeblr proper. 

ABOUT ME

late 20s

black & queer & disabled 

lifelong writer/musician/creative (in both professional and hobbyist capacities)

finally finishing my degree in creative writing & english! 

ARTISTIC/THEMATIC INTERESTS 

literary fiction, horror, camp, kitsch, diversity, introspection, family/friend bonds (especially nontraditional ones), romance, art rock, nostalgia, technology, diy ethos 

GOALS

connect with the tumblr writing community at large! for a while i was unable to get excited about my non-work, non-fanfic related writing projects. over the past year or so, my passion’s been renewed, and i just wanna chatter with like-minded folks about my longform WIPs, my short stories, etc – and geek over other people’s work here too <3

WIPS 

Dagmar

there’s always something going down in dagmar, an insular coastal community straddling the delaware bay. pragmatic tech geek zeke omezie-fumudoh, 18, prefers to keep her head in her books and projects – deaths and disappearances were common in her parents’ home country, too, after all. when her best friend dodie dies, however, zeke has no choice but to start trying to connect the dots & face the potential supernatural forces at play. 

[this is finna be dark fantasy/horror, romance, mystery, and queer as hell! i got a lot of worldbuilding to do, but a few months ago the twist popped into my head 1st and i’ve been working backwards. i'm sooo excited abt figuring out the narrative path(s) i gotta take]

Dave & The Family Davenport

20-year-old twin musicians dorian & daria davenport are a little s club 7, a little sly stone, & a whole lotta spitfire. as the very first act signed to holliday records, 30-something producer & label founder dave levine considers it his duty to take the family davenport under his wing. they become his pet project – and eventually something more to him. 

[i’m taking this one in a literary/drama direction! thinking found family and music industry commentary vibes. idea came from revisiting big time rush and thinking ‘what would happen if you mix btr + the carpenters + prince + mtv’s making the band??’ (for the record, dave is 100% NOT meant to be a p. d*ddy analogue re: making the band, i'm mainly thinking of the aesthetics of the young artists of color featured on the show)]

Several fun essays about my personal fandom/shipping history (one is about all the diff sites i've used over 17+ years of reading/writing fanfic, another is an old-school livejournal-style ship manifesto that i plan to make into a video! etc etc)

SHORT FICTION 

blank [literary/drama, 300 wds]

fortune teller [literary/drama, 300 wds]

hothouse [horror, 500 wds]

a certain standard of care [horror-comedy/surreal/gross-out, 1k wds]

good bones (or, an exercise in letting go) [literary/dramedy, 1.3k wds]

[writing tag: scorpio the scribe]

hmu if you think we'd get along <3 i need more ppl to follow!

[ETA: i prefer to follow/be mutuals w/ ppl 18+ only, ty!]

[dokidokiliteraturegirls]

Progress Update: September 2024

Hello everyone! Yui Wrong here, to give you an update regarding the progress that's been made towards bringing Feel Less back from hiatus 💖

So! Soon it'll be 2 months since Feel Less went on hiatus. And on the one hand that kinda pisses me off bc I really really like publishing this webcomic and not doing it feels like I'm missing something important from my life 😭 on the other hand, I'm satisfied with the progress that's been made! Development of updates #37 and #38 has been steady, so I don't feel like I've wasted time. However, although I've been consistently making progress towards Feel Less's return, I feel like there's been some radio silence here in the blog, so I wanted to give you all an update about how things have been going ^^

For starters, lemme start with what I've been doing. Before doing any illustrations for the new updates, I decided to take a small break to practice my art style, as I was really unsatisfied with how my drawings were coming out. I focused on head shapes, as those felt inconsistent in my art. Here's a couple doodles I did in August for practice

I want to keep practicing, but I decided figuring out a consistent head shape was enough for now and got to work on the updates. And I'm glad I did! I do believe there's been some noticeable improvement in some pieces~ Like for example, take this old MG illustration compared to a WIP for update #38

I like both, but I'm especially happy with the 2nd one~

After practicing for a couple of weeks I went straight into planning out the next updates and got to work on the artwork. And the result was that... 29 illustrations in total would be needed for updates #37 and #38!!

That's. Too many. So while drawing I've also been cutting the plan down and deleting some superfluous panels. After trimming the excess, I ended up with a much more realistic... 27 panels!! There, now that's doable 🥰

I jest of course, but my point is that a lot of work needs to be done and I've been consistently going at it for the past 2 months. As of now, 9 of the illustrations have been fully completed. I also have 2 WIPS I'm currently working on, so that number will go up soon.

Does this mean it'll take 4 more months to get this done? Of course not! ...hopefully. Listen, I make no promises, but I'll try not to take too long. I value your time and am really grateful for your patience. Besides, I don't want people getting bored because I took too long to return from a cliffhanger. I'm not Andrew Hussie. My full time job and real life chores usually mean that I only have about an hour a day to work on art, but I have a couple plans to make production faster, such as cutting down some more planned panels and buying a keyboard that doesn't make noise. Why would a keyboard's noise be relevant? Well, it's not. I mean, I guess if I had that, I'd be able to draw while taking calls from work without my bosses noticing, as it wouldnt be picked my the microphone, and that'd give me an extra 10 hours a day to draw. But I won't do that, because that'd be irresponsible and unprofessional. So therefore, the keyboard is irrelevant. Forget I mentioned it.

Also, a point I imagine some people might be wondering: Why make it so long anyway? There's no one forcing me to have complicated scenes or almost 30 illustrations. It's my webcomic, I can do whatever I want. And taking a long break where I'm not even on break might sound like a dumb idea. However, for me, Feel Less is not just a webcomic I publish on my free time. I'd like it to be a showcase of the very best I can do at the point in time when an update is posted. From that perspective, it'd be dumb not to put effort into it. To compromise the quality of my works for the sake of following a schedule has never been something I've been a fan of. Now, I do want to be realistic, but also I don't want to feel like I'm giving up and just putting out whatever I can finish by my imaginary deadline. It's a delicate balance, but for these two updates in specific, I think quality should take precedence for a bit. My goal is for you guys to read them and go "oh, no wonder it took a while". At least for those 2, then we can go back to schedule.

Overall, my point is: progress is being made! It's currently all being done behind closed doors, so it might not be noticeable for you guys. But I promise, I haven't been twiddling my thumbs for these past 2 months! Maybe I should've, because my hands are quite cramped tbh. But no matter, art must be made! In the meantime, I'll leave you with a couple panels I've finished so you guys can see some of the work that's been done~

I'll continue updating you guys as time goes on~ If you want consistent updates, I've been dropping the number of finished panels on the discord server every time I'm done with one! Also, if you'd like to help me get to the point where I can work only 5 hours a day and put more time into the comic, you can support me on Patreon and get some goodies and custom drawings while you're there ^^

Thank you all once again for your patience, I'll keep working hard for you all 💖

[arenabreadandbiscuits]

Gosh I HATE X.

Rant below about small artists and not getting much of a chance to actually grow in social media.

Not only do they not tell me what the problem is when the report something so I can't fix it but I get on or try to get on and apparently I can't? My account was deleted? It won't log me in on my art one??? I'm annoyed by it.. I can only be glad I have a following here on Tumblr and Tumblr helps push certain things out compared to X.

I'm honestly mad because I was using X as another way to reach out to people who want commissions but also for fandom interactions. I'm also mad because like I've said for like the hundredth time, you can literally find people fcking on X and their videos and things get to stay up but I draw FanArt and write stories and MINE gets taken down??? Smh especially as someone doing commissions because my mom is in the hospital rn and I genuinely need the funds for a while..

I'm working on one commission right now. I'll take three right now for cheap prices because I understand people don't find value in art all the time but I'll have to bring prices up or either continuously work for the cheaper ones and save up.

Actually let me ask this now.

Some this picture contains four characters, a window with extra background, objects and background, and various expressions and poses. The time on it hit 13 hours on ibis. In my mind of course I want money to help my situations.

With this picture as an example I count people and characters as $10 each, little accessories and such are $1 each and there's at least 12 in here up front from the beer cans to the dresser. The picture took 13 hours so $40 × 13 equals $520. It took me at least a week to get this piece done. Considering the hospital issues, the at home issues, pet situations, food issues, and little transportation I have when I need something important done I think for pieces like this the price is fair.

Idk, people who commission others can you tell me what you think? I'm down to do cheap prices too it just depends of what's being asked like the current commission I'm doing which is this one:

Is $30 dollars for the commissioner considering they just want the lineart which I'm more than happy to do. If anyone knows any discord groups or websites that give artist commissions please let me know. I just can't believe X rn... Also matter of fact this was the wip I posted before my account was taken down... Doesn't like like anything against Twitter guidelines to me but fck us small artists that NEED exposure I guess.

How I'm pricing after finishing this commission and two others perhaps because I literally can't afford to not price it like I'm thinking of doing.

So:

$10 dollars per person/character

$1 for each background object/accessories - cups, glasses, trash cans, ash trays, etc etc

And after all that is set I'll multiply those numbers by the amount of hours I finish which is where the majority of the money goes and after that's it, I get paid and you get your piece. (Of course check ins are allowed and changes as long as changes art completely different from their original idea. I'm always okay drawing at least three sketches for customers to pick from if they don't like the first sketch.)

I've made a post already on my current visit at the hospital for my mom. She majorly deals with everything in the home so her being sick will mean we'll need extra funds. I don't work right now because I myself got sick last year with GBS and I'm still healing, not just that but there's only one car for the household which is my mom's so with everything happening I couldn't possibly get a job now. My grandma has dementia and there's three other people in the house though two of them hardly do much to keep bills paid. It's just a lot and really anything would help us right now. So to any commissioners if you are commissioning me whether it's little or big I very much appreciate you with all my heart.

And even if you can't commission reblogging and liking is just fine as well since it helps boost posts.

[prettyboybuckley]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

tagged by @saybiwithme @bi-buckrights @zainclaw

How many works do you have on ao3?

160

What's your total ao3 word count?

1,070,239

What fandoms do you write for?

I've mostly written for 9-1-1, though I started off with Shameless (6 fics) and I have written some for Teen Wolf (5 fics). There's one 9-1-1 crossover with Schitt's Creek.

Top five fics by kudos:

parents always yelling (telling us to get our acts together)

i just want something to hold on to (and a little of that human touch)

I will come to you (even in my sleep)

open up again (i believe in second chances)

exes and the oh's

Do you respond to comments?

Always, even if it takes me months. I actually just caught up again (there's still a bunch to go, but right now the oldest is 17 days ago instead of 250 days...). It's just a rule I have for myself, and even with the backlog I've kept it up so far, so I'm not going to stop doing it now.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I'm not a big fan of angsty endings, I generally try to at least make it a hopeful ending or, in the case of the college au, use an epilogue to fix things.

But I guess sunny skies & summer highs qualifies as an angsty ending simply because of the cliffhanger (and yes, there is still going to be a continuation, I'm working on it 🙈).

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Choosing one out of 160 is really hard, but I think tell me, will you stay or will you run away is definitely one that deserves a mention here, because it already has a happy ending and then the epilogue just makes it even better 🥰

Do you get hate on fics?

Not commented on the fic itself, no. I've had some people talk shit about my fics on twitter, though, and not even vaguely but calling me by (user)name.

Do you write smut?

Is grass green? Yeah, I write smut 🤭 Thanks to two times kinktober, I have 95 explicit fics, by far the most used rating for my fics.

Craziest crossover:

let's have some fun tonight is my 9-1-1/Schitt's Creek crossover fic for 9-1-1 Rarepair Week, and my only crossover fic

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

My head over feet Buddie valentine's two-parter got posted as one chapter in Wattpad work with over 30 fics once. Filed a DMCA and Wattpad took it down within two hours.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Two of my fics have been translated into Russian afaik, one on ao3 and one on Ficbook

Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Nope. It may be a nice challenge for the future? Not sure who I'd do it with.

All time favourite ship?

Gotta go for Buddie on that one, lol. Especially if you look at my writing history. But I often tend to hyperfixate on one ship at a time (current reading obsession is McDanno)

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Buck's POV of if love is art then you might be my masterpiece. I really want to, but at this point it's been two years since the original so I don't know if it'd be worth it either. (I know not everyone was happy about how I ended it, but I doubt any of them are still waiting for more). Writing a different POV of the same fic takes an amount of planning that my brain just really struggles with. And I could pick up where the last chapter (before the epilogue) picks up, but I think that way there would be some crucial information about Buck missing.

What are your writing strengths?

I've been told quite a lot of times that I am good at keeping characters, well, in character, even when putting them in partial or complete AU's. Of course, what is in character or not is subjective, but I do always challenge myself to work as much of the canon backstory and personality into who they are in the AU as possible.

And I like to think I'm pretty good at writing smut.

What are your writing weaknesses?

I'm terrible at pacing, which multiple of my long fics prove. It'll be drawn out first and then suddenly rushing. And being ESL I do struggle with things like sentence structure and grammar pretty regularly still.

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

As long as there is some kind of translation provided somewhere I like it, but I'm not so quick to use it myself. Not beyond a few Spanish words here and there (generally pet names between Eddie and his family we've seen on the show or the occasional curse word when I feel it fits better than an English one, but I usually need to employ help from Spanish-speaking friends for those).

First fandom you wrote in?

Shameless! I binged that right before I started 9-1-1 and combined with the creative writing minor I was doing, it was actually what got me back into writing in general and what made me write my first ever fic.

Favorite fic you've written?

My in your arms i feel safe-series (which I always lovingly refer to as the ace kink fic) is definitely one of my favorites simply because of how personal it is to me and for the reason behind me writing it in the first place.

Other strong contenders are i would've loved you forever (it's never enough but i wanted it to be) and i'm begging you, come home to me (Teen Wolf, Thiam)

tagging @monsterrae1 @rogerzsteven @loserdiaz @watchyourbuck

[tellmegoodbye]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you @sznofthesticks for the tag!

How many works do you have on ao3?

10. I used to have around 30, but I orphaned a bunch of my old stuff recently.

What's your total ao3 word count?

112,750

What fandoms do you write for?

Shameless, 911 Lone Star, and hopefully 911 in the future? I really want to but I don't have any ideas atm.

Top five fics by kudos:

I excluded fics that I cowrote, so this is all completely my own writing. These are all more recent too, so this is much more representative of my current writing style.

shut the door and let go

lover, please stay

when all is said and done

our love will guide us home

will the pain stop (if we go deeper)

Do you respond to comments?

I try to respond to as many as I can! Sometimes I run out of words to say (communication has never been my strong suit) but I read every single one and they always make me smile.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

will the pain stop (if we go deeper)

This is the most I have ever projected my personal experience onto a fic. I was going through a breakup at the time and not handling it very well, and writing a breakup fic really helped me cope with it at the time.

I'm doing much better now, and my ex and I are on good terms. Even though the ending to the fic itself was angsty, I'd like to imagine that the characters are doing better now as well.

What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of my fics tend to have happy endings, but if I had to pick the most satisfying happy ending it would be lover, please stay.

Most of this fic is pretty angsty, but the ending makes it all worth it I think!

Do you get hate on fics?

Thankfully I haven't received any nasty comments. I did receive a kind of weird comment once, but I completely forget what it even was.

Do you write smut?

I never did before I got into the shameless fandom, and then I kind of went crazy with it after that.

Craziest crossover:

I've never written a crossover before. It's not something I've ever considered or even know if I would want to do.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Hopefully not!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Many times with my ex, back when we were still dating. It was a lot of fun and definitely something I'd like to try again in the future! I've always enjoyed collaborating with other people.

All time favorite ship:

Favorite ship I've written for? Tarlos. Favorite ship I've never written for? Tiva, aka Tony and Ziva from ncis. I also love Densi (Deeks and Kensi) from ncis la.

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I have not written a chaptered fic in years and it is something I would really like to do. I have several ideas including a detective au that I've floated between two separate fandoms, but I still haven't been able to make any progress regarding those wips.

What are your writing strengths?

Angst and introspection! I love getting into a character's head and psychoanalyzing them (I am a psych student, after all 😂) and I also love writing sad shit. I'm a sucker for pain, it seems.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Transitions. We all know them, we all loathe them.

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

If it makes sense for the situation/characters, of course! I wouldn't go overboard with it though, since I don't actually speak any other languages myself.

First fandom you wrote in:

Minecraft youtube, but like the old school kind. Around 2014-2015ish. And I physically wrote everything down in little journals. Fanfic was only something that existed in my head at the time until I discovered the likes of ff.net.

Favorite fic you've written:

My most recent fic always becomes my favorite, and that holds true today too!

My push coda, my baby, our love will guide us home.

This is something I'm incredibly proud of, and it's also my longest fic to date and something I wasn't sure I would ever be able to finish. I'm still kind of in disbelief that it's finally real.

Tagging (with no pressure ofc) @strandnreyes @carlos-in-glasses @freneticfloetry @welcometololaland and @lemonlyman-dotcom

I do remember this tag going around a few months ago so if you've already done this, you can either do it again if you want to or just accept this virtual hug from me. 🫂

[gingerlegacy07]

Writer Interview Game

Thank you @morelikeravenbore for the tag! Everyone please check out her blog! She's a great writer with a beautiful MC!

When did you start writing? I was around 12/13 when I first wrote an actual little story. I loved doing it once for an assignment at school and from there on I kept writing. Mostly it was little love stories I made up, but when I was 15 I really got into Cinema Bizarre and wrote a (very bad, very cringey) chaptered story about them. I also wrote a pretty big Supernatural story in Dutch, but I never continued it after about 30 chapters. I stopped writing for a few years after that. I always loved reading fanfiction though and once I got into Kpop when I was 20, I started writing a little bit again. Mostly oneshots and all. After that I didn't write in over 8 years. Well, at one point I did try my hand on an orginal story, but I'm not even two chapters in so... Anyway, when HL came out I really got obsessed with it. And I started reading fanfiction about it. Before I knew it I was writing again and this time actually finished every story I started haha. Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write? The only trope rather than genre that I enjoy reading, but haven't written (yet lol) is enemies-to-lovers. I absolutely love that trope, but only if it's done well. And I have not yet dared to try it because I feel like I wouldn't make it good. But one day I do really want to try writing it. Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often? No. I'd rather have my own style and so far I haven't been compared to someone. Though I do admit that since I read most books in English, I've gotten some ideas of describing certain scenes or use certain wording in my writing. Can you tell me a bit about your writing space? Simple; on my bed, on my couch or sitting at my dinner table haha. I'll admit I've even wrote a bit at work lol. I don't really care for the space around me. All I need is my laptop and the inspiration/want to write and the words will come to me.

What's your most effective way to muster up a muse? Listening to music, reading or watching a movie. Basically seeing or hearing anything that tells a story. A lot of times it either brings me ideas on how to proceed or it creates a vague outline for me which I want to expand and write a oneshot. I have a few stories written that are heavily based on a song. But sometimes I want to progress my WIP and want something to happen, just that I don't know what. Music, video's or book can help with that. Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you? Absolutely. Heartbreak, fluffiness, happy family life. With nsfw fics it's the aftercare scene and there's almost always some form of trauma. It doesn't surprise me as those themes are the ones I love to write and feel comfortable writing. Happy family life and aftercare is something I enjoy writing a lot and fluff is something I write because I'm a huge empath and need some fluff (especially after writing a very angsty scene or oneshot) to heal me. Heartbreak can make for the most delicious and soulcrushing angst and trauma does that too. They also help with character development; your character goes through something terrible and you'll need to write them dealing with it and moving on (or not) from it in their own way. What is your reason for writing? Because I want to read something that I haven't seen before or is hard to find and then I decide, well I can just write it myself. For example: with HL, I stuck to reading fanfiction until I started shipping Ominis and Poppy together. There were hardly any fics out there and the very few that were, only had them as a minor side couple. So I decided I wanted to write something with them, where they develop a friendship that turns into a relationship overtime. Very slowburn. At the same time I wanted people to read it or at least get interested and since I was sure just writing them as a main couple might not work (and honestly, I do love me some good SebastianxMC), I decided to make the main characters SebastianxReader (so whoever read it could insert either themselves, their own MC or someone they made up on the spot) with Ominis and Poppy as a pretty big side couple. So yeah, my main reason for writing is because I always got ideas in my head that I would love to read, but is hard to find. Thus I try writing it myself. Is their any specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating? Honestly, any kind of positive comment is already motivating to me. But whenever someone takes their time to give a bit more details to their thoughts about my writing, it is extremely motivating for me to write more. It always helps to know someone likes it enough to leave a long comment and with giving their thoughts, I can get a bit of perspective on what my readers like/do not like. How do you want to be thought about by your readers? Good question. I don't necessarily want them to have a particular opinion about me, but I'd be flattered if, whenever they see my name besides a title, they think along the lines of: Oh I do like her stories. I dunno. It's always nice to know people enjoy your work, but as far as having an opinion about me, it doesn't matter really. What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer? I think understanding the characters I write and sticking to that while I develop their growth in my stories. How do you feel about your own writing? Not gonna lie, I always thought it was trash, but ever since I started writing for HL I actually like it now. Still, the first few chapters of my trilogy are a bit... icky to me, but overall I think I do a decent job at writing and it's pretty good. Most importantly; I love it!

That was fun! Thank you for whoever made this :D NP tags: @writingannyred @polarisgreenley @zetadraconis11 @sallowslove @mspegasus17

[theartofdreaming1]

Fanfic Tagging Game

I got tagged by the lovely @wurzelbertzwerg - thank you! 💕

1. How many works do you have on AO3? - 30

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

111,591 words (at the moment)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently, I'm writing for The Quarry and the Batfam fandom (primarily DickBabs and BatCat)... I have posted fics for The Flash TV series and Brooklyn 99 on AO3 in the past... plus, some other stuff that is only on my old fanfiction.net account (although I've been considering updating my old Young Justice fics, so I may post them on AO3 some day)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Um, Rush Hour, Partners, Knight in Shining Armor, Loveable Nerds and Superheroes and Thank You, Becky Cooper - except for Partners, these are all Flash fics, which is wild, because aside from Rush Hour and Loveable Nerds and Superheroes, both of which I'm still quite proud of, I don't necessarily think that my Flash fics are my best works, but okay ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

5. Do you respond to comments?

Sometimes? I often don't know what to say in response 😅- but I appreciate every single one of them sooo much! 💕

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Okay... so this question prompted me to do some re-reading of my older fics... and honestly? Nothing on my AO3 account had an angsty ending to begin with ^^; So I had to go waaaay back, to my old ff.net account - and I think my Young Justice fic "Pain" had the angstiest ending (and even then, it's pretty moderate... even 17-year-old me was fairly mellow ;)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hmmh... Maybe my Flash fic "Coming Home"? It certainly has a very warm and fuzzy ending ☺️

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not that I can recall, no...

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Nope; smut is not for me

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

No, I don't really write crossovers (only multiple fandoms that already share a universe, i.e. Batfam-comic fandom)

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of...

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope - since I'm a very slow writer, I wouldn't want to punish any potential co-writer of mine with that curse either...

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

To write? Hmmh... BatCat and DickBabs for sure! (Plus, LauraMax are getting there, too... I just need to give them some time to cement their position ;)

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Oh boy, there are plenty of fics I'm worried I'll never finish... but I choose to stay optimistic enough to think that I will, someday, finish all the WIPs that I want to finish... (please, writing Gods, please help me accomplish this task!!!!)

16. What are your writing strengths?

Umm... I like to think that my writing is quite, um, pleasant? What I mean is, that it's pretty accessible (not too convoluted or complex, but also not boring) and while I sometimes write angsty/tense/sad moments, my stories generally have happy endings... And even though my writing isn't exactly groundbreaking, I still stand by all the ideas/concepts behind every story I've written so far, so... yeah...

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

The process of writing itself (I have to fight for every single word I commit onto the page... I swear, me and writing are engaged in the most tedious wrestling match nobody ever wants to see... ever). I get excited for a particular story, start to jot down some basic ideas, maybe even put in some research for a few points that need to get tackled beforehand - and then psyche myself out of being able to write down that dang story 😩 (Doesn't help that I have a hard time making decisions and get super intimidated when faced with all the possible directions a story could go)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Depends on the context - if we're talking about two foreigners (e.g. Germans) that are talking to each other in their native tongue and maybe don't want to be understood by the people around them (who, for the sake of this argument, are all English speakers) - then, maybe I would give it a whirl, because it would fit the idea behind the conversation (especially if it's a short exchange that people, who would be interested in learning what the Germans said, could look up via Google translate) - but, imo, this only works in very specific circumstances and for short exchanges - otherwise it can get tedious real quick... and personally, I don't like writing in German and don't feel confident enough in my Spanish skills to attempt it for that language, so writing English all the way is it for me

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Um... a quick look at my old, old fanfiction.net account tells me that my first posted fanfic was for the "Sonny With A Chance" fandom when I was 14 years old - the writing is a little... rough, for sure 😅 (although, to be fair, this was written at a point when I had only had, like, 3-4 years of proper English class... all things considered, it's not that bad)

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

Don't make me choose, I can't pick just one!

I very, very much love my BatCat fic "The Chase" - it just feels like pure Selina, the pacing of it is great and I think it portrays Bruce/Selina's relationship dynamic so very well (plus, it has some of my favorite sentences I've ever written in there!)

I also love Partners for being the longest, most ambitious story I've written so far (yes, despite the fact that I still need to add that epiogue!) and On the Reciprocal Attraction of Heavenly Bodies has the potential to become my best fic of them all, with the Austen-esque writing style and all the historical and literary research I plan on putting into it... I'm certainly very fond of the two chapters that already exist.

And This Is Not Over, But Just the Beginning is so fun and challenging in a different way; being a Quarry fic, with the whole werewolf element, it's darker and more angsty than anything I've written in a long time - but that's what makes it so fascinating for me to write (and read)

I'll tag @queenofbaws @thychesters @rosegardeninwinter @icequeen-07 @clearbluewaters and @mollywog - only if they want to, of course! :)

[little-peril-stories]

nano 2023 let's gooo

Well, friends, it's that time of year again. Why I have once again decided to leap straight from Whumptober to Nanowrimo, no one knows, but here we go.

The difference from 2022 to 2023: last year, for both Whumptober and Nano, I was "playing to win" (so to speak —playing against myself, of course), while this year I wasn't/will not be. Like, if I end up writing 50,000 words this November, great!

But. I have an issue with being competitive (again, only against myself; I hate competing against others in most contexts) and I know I will get obsessive about 1667 words every day and getting every single badge, etc., etc.

So I'm just...not.

I don't have a word count goal. The goal is simply to finish the first draft of angsty heist wip. If I can, great. If not, great. I started it in April, got distracted by TQOL and life, and the poor story's been languishing around the midpoint since I put it aside. I think if I can push beyond the midpoint, I'll be all right. But even if that turns out not to be true—oh well!

I'm still going to work on TQOL, and since I've fallen into editing TPOT and have been looooooving that process, I'm going to keep doing that, too. So this Nano is really just going to be about doing the writing things I want to do and that make me happy, and if angsty heist wip gets finished as part of that journey, well, bonus.

Is this more a #CalmWriMo as coined by @winterandwords? Why, I suppose it is. Thanks for putting forth the idea and the hashtag. 😊

Anyway. Happy November, happy Nanowrimo, happy Calmwrimo, happy another day of being alive, and happy writing!

Bonus lines for anyone who made it to the bottom of this ramble lolololol.

From The Queen of Lies chapter whatever-the-hell-it-is-now-this-one-used-to-be-chapter-7:

In the faintest reaches of her heart, she allowed herself to grieve ever so little, and to wonder if she would ever see him again.

I made it to Chapter 30 in editing The Prince of Thieves, oh god oh god:

“I don’t know anything else,” she says, her voice shaking. She’s half off the floor, frozen now, breath coming in little bursts. I know, whether I live beyond today or not, I will never be able to forget this moment—her terrified gasping, her wide eyes, the way her chest rises and falls so fast it’s hard to follow. My hand tingles, fuzzy and warm in memory of how it clung to hers all night, and I am struck with how much the idea of Hatchett ending Bree Cooper’s life threatens to rip me apart from the inside.

nothing for angsty heist wip lol I'm sure those will be forthcoming throughout the month

[valkeakuulas]

Fic Writer 20 Questions

@blirzy thank you for the tag~ I think I've done this before but eh, can always do it again!

1.) How many works do you have on ao3? 65! I'm hoping to post at least 3-4 fics more before the year ends

2.) What’s your ao3 word count? 406,207 (only???)

3.) What fandoms do you write for? Okay, here's the thing. When I'm in a fandom, I mostly write for that fandom alone. Not to other fandoms. First it was Naruto (good ol' J & Fanfiction.net), then it was Transformers (with a dash of Shippu! Iron Leaguer) and now it's Star Wars: The Clone Wars.

I was most productive with the first and last fandom.

4.) What are your top five fics by kudos? Lol, I already know what #1 is

The Most Unexpected Courting (Transformers but with details from several 'verses, Sunstreaker/Ratchet/Sideswipe)

suffer in pleasure, forever and ever (SW: The Clone Wars, rotating between 4 solid ships and 1 fluid ship)

30 Days of Jazz and Prowl (Transformers, what is says in the tin)

Cake Galore (SW: The Clone Wars, Fives/numerous clones)

31 Days of Clone Wars Fictober (SW: The Clone Wars, numerous ships)

5.) Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?! I do! At one point when didn't really post anything, I didn't and it bothers me now a bit.

6.) What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? ... idk? Have I written angsty stuff? I think I have? EDIT: NO WAIT I HAVE! IN MY LATEST MERMAY! There was a few angsty chapters there, one with ended with a dead character!

7.) What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Nearly all of my fics have happy endings because I don't like angst unless there's a happy ending in sight in the tags.

8.) Do you get hate on fics? Nope. Don't think I ever have.

9.) Do you write smut? If so what kind? Okay, see, this question here is the one that reminded me that I've done this before.

The short answer to this question is yes, I write smut. A lot of smut. Maybe a little too much smut. But I like to think that I write happy smut, not sad smut. Also, I'm very vanilla kind of smut writer.

10.) Do you write cross overs? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? Does Cody getting railed by a droid called Meister-who's-definitely-not-Jazz count as a cross-over?

11.) Have you ever had a fic stolen? Why would anyone want to steal my fic? While these days I've got a proofreader (as I did back in my TF & IL days, thank you @gaogaigar-the-king ) I know more than a few of them should be proofread again and so on. My fics are good, but they aren't that good.

12.) Have you ever had a fic translated? Not that I know of.

13.) Have you ever cowritten a fic before? No, not really. I've done fic & art collab before but wouldn't mind trying my hand with cowriting if anyone were interested.

14.) What’s your all time favourite ship? ... OK, if we go with the true origin OP, it's Hatake Kakashi/Umino Iruka (Naruto) but! if I have to name my favorite character that I enjoyed shipping with pretty much anyone, that would be Ratchet (Transformers). Ratchet/ironhide, Ratchet/Wheeljack, Ratchet/Twins, Ratchet/Optimus just to name a few.

15.) What’s a WIP you’d like to finish, but doubt you ever will? That godsdamned fantasy AU...

16.) What are your writing strengths? I didn't know this before but apparently I have a habit where a short fic starts in one way but ends in a completely different but surprising way. Often seen in fics I write as replies to prompts here in Tumblr.

17.) What are your writing weaknesses? This is not my grammar. These are not my prepositions. My fic tag's called "valkeakuulas writes AKA butchers English grammar".

And that I write mainly one shots with no true plot. They be so thin, not a layer in sight. 😭

18.) Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? I like dropping Finnish words in my current fics as names and whatnots. I used to drop Japanese words when wrote KakaIru (yes, I was one of those writers)

But a whole dialogue? Uncertain.

19.) First fandom you wrote for? A true Narutard reporting for duty.

20.) Favourite fic you’ve ever written? I can't really say.

Nearly all the fics I've written are favorite of mine on some levels. Sure, there are ones I'd like to rewrite in some parts but ultimate favorite? I've got no memory what answered here the last time but think it was something similar.

NP tagging @trudemaethien @sharky857

[maaikeatthefullmoon]

This week I have mostly been reading...

May 27th – Jun 2nd, 2024

This week has mostly been taken up by reading the behemoth that is Rough Enough…AND I finished my WIP – all details below. It’s been a week.

Completed works I've read this week:

Rough Enough For Love by Nekhen Rated E – A GO Human AU classic. It’s *extremely* E rated, so pass it up if that’s not your thing – the NSFW isn’t skippable. It’s an absolute BEAST at 403,339 words over 42 chapters and took me most of the week to read but I was HOOKED. It’s a D/s themed story, but atypical and beautifully written. There is so much beautiful vulnerability and the most achingly gorgeous CARE ever written. Also major, hardcore Pining™️ & ©️Yearning. I’ve got some experience in D/s spheres and thought I had my preferences iron-clad in my head and this story has managed to turn EVERYTHING on its head, or at least it's given me a lot to think about. This is one of those fics which will stick with me. As someone with family-related trauma, I’d add a content warning for family judgement/feelings of severe inferiority due to family trauma.

Terminus by @emotional-support-demon-crowley Rated T – This was on my WIP list but has now been completed - *sniffle*. Astronaut A is guided back to Earth by controller C after 92 years in space. There are many difficulties both of them have to face and they develop an amazing rapport. Ch 17/17 posted this week.

WIPs which have updated this week (which I devour as soon as I get the update!)

There Is A Light And It Never Goes Out by @phoen1xr0se Rated M - A is a researcher (puffins!), C is a lighthouse keeper on the island where A has run away to to escape his problems and do his research. The author has recently spent a week studying puffins - which is the ultimate dedication, if you ask me. Ch 9/26 posted this week

Find The Light by @klikandtuna Rated E - Headmaster A and Rockstar C. The story teases out a fraught history between them whilst keeping a tension between them in the modern day. Ch 8/? posted this week.

Oddity by @tsyvia48 Rated E - Actor C is contracted by (useless) Gabriel to guest curate an exhibition at the museum where A works. After getting off on the wrong foot, can they work together to pull off this show? Ch 24/26 posted this week

Under The Summer Stars by @pannotbread Rated E - This wonderful fic has taught me more about physics than school ever did (mostly because I never did any physics, but...well). A & C have to share their time at an observatory because there is Only One Telescope. Not only will you learn about astrophysics, astrobiology, and astroecology, you'll also read some of the most poetically, beautifully written masturbation scenes I've ever seen. *ahem* Ch 8/13 posted this week.

Exodus_2 by @tismrot Rated E – Human AU set in a dystopian future. The summary says it best, really: Ezra studies programming at the University of ha-Gan. He’s as determined as he is damaged, as fastidious as he is precise, and likes to believe he'll stop at nothing to achieve his goals. His beliefs are challenged when a new student appears late to the first Ethics module lecture - and his life is changed forever. It's the future, it's dystopian, it's cyber and it's punk. It's political, grimy and slick with tears, lube and chemical snot. TW: Sex, drugs, trauma. Ch 30/35 posted this week.

Free by well, me: imposterssyndrome Rated E - A & C meet (again?) in an acute mental health ward after both having had mental health crises. A runs a bookshop but is very much under his parents' control. C has been homeless since childhood and has struggled his entire life. They do not trust each other when they first meet, but feel strangely drawn to one another all the same. Where will this lead them? This is a passion piece for me. There is a lot of lived experience in it, and extensive research from both professionals and peers. It has been a real journey for me to write it, and as I'm coming closer to the end it's becoming very emotional for me. Ch 48/56 posted this week – I officially finished writing this this week! I’m updating more frequently now, although I still have to proof & edit each chapter before I publish it.

Want more recommendations? This is last week's list.

[pyroweasel]

Gonna Give @thepromptfoundry OC-Tober Prompt list a try!

I'm pretty behind and can't promise I'll catch up, or even post every day seeing as I've got a few wips in the works.

But what I do finish, I'm just going to post here. I'm using this prompt list to help me further develop Tammy as a character, so most writes will be short and very much to the point.

Prompt 1 - Getting Up In The Morning

Tammy goes to bed at 10:30 pm sharp.

This is a hard and fast rule - obeyed at every turn.

Unless, of course, Tammy is otherwise distracted. If it is putting paint to canvas or programming a new code or carefully mixing ingredients together in the kitchen - when it creates, it blocks out the world entirely, and sometimes it even misses its bedtime.

But otherwise, it always goes to bed at 10:30 pm. Where it falls asleep immediately - bundled beneath soft, warm blankets and supported by cushioned pillows - without even a second given to any thoughts at all.

Sometimes it dreams, sometimes it doesn't - but it never remembers, because it simply doesn't care to. If its dreams are anything like its art, then it's confident they're mostly comprised of its progenitors and their proclivities.

Tammy wakes up at exactly 6:00 am, every single morning.

It doesn't use an alarm - it doesn't need one - waking up exactly on the hour is hard-wired into its brain. Even on those nights when it is too focused to sleep and works through the night, six a.m. always rouses it from its stupor.

Usually, though, it stirs awake in its bed. Asleep, and then awake, with no grogginess to work through. Still, it never rushes from the covers - it takes its time to stretch and move, limbering up its body and letting the blood flow.

Then it tucks its sleep mask securely away, rips open the curtains, and begins getting ready for the day.

It showers - a cold, brisk thing that's only as long as it takes Tammy to shampoo its hair and soap its body. Then it dries, and spends much longer working lotion into every inch of skin, clipping its nails to the perfect length, and working its hair to its usual soft, clean neatness.

Then it digs in its dresser drawers for the least wrinkled clothing it can find, dresses, and heads for the kitchen.

Some days it makes an extravagent meal - French toast and homemade sausage and almost more eggs than it can stomach. Other days it keeps it much more simple - just eggs, or a couple of pieces of toast, or oatmeal. It prefers juice as its morning drink - but sometimes it will suck down a bitter black coffee instead.

And then, it decides what to do that day.

Every once in awhile - very rarely - it wanders from its home and mingles among the humans below. Sometimes out of boredom, but more often because it requires the nourishment it can only get from human souls.

Most of the time, though, it sets itself in front of a canvas or the computer or a book or even the stove - and spends the rest of its day in a creative fugue state.

[sourrind]

Thanks @celinou & @momochizoey for tagging me 🤍

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

I've got 4 works total.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

73,030 words.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Seeing as how I only have 4 works, I'll just mention the fic with the most kudos - my Wenclair fic "At the End of One's Woe" with 760 kudos.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do! I love it when writers respond to my comments (as inane as they are), so I thought I should do the same.

Not only that, but sometimes I'll reply to a comment when there's a new chapter of that work just to kind of nudge them to read it.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

"To Know Yourself."

It's a Chasefield fic and it's the first thing I started writing when I got back into the fanfic space. It's currently sitting at 6 chapters unfinished, but where I left it off is probably the angstiest thing I've explored publicly on my account.

32,000 words, and the poor girls don't even like each other yet.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Either the aforementioned Wenclair fic or my Chasefield smutfic "One and Then the Other." I mean, what's a happier ending then getting to bang the girl you like?

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I've not.

9. Do you write smut?

Yes!

I was very nervous to publish that first smutfic, but I wasn't a stranger to writing things of an explicit nature.

I used to ERP on Gaia ALL THE TIME when I was younger, but it definitely was a different thing to write stuff like that and know it would be going out for everyone to see.

But I had a blast writing it and I don't see myself straying away from smut anytime soon. The only thing I don't like is how I find it very difficult to write smut without tons of preamble beforehand, so that's kind of the one thing holding me back.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've ever written?

I've not.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I've not, though I wouldn't be against it.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I've not, just the casual headcanon talks with friends and mutuals.

14. What's your all time favorite ship?

I love all the Life is Strange ships, but Chasefield holds a very special place in my heart for getting me back into fandom/fanfic as a whole.

Wenclair is also up there - it was very fun to write for an active/ongoing fandom and it was kind of crazy to see how different the response was in that.

For ships that I love, but haven't written for, I'm enamored with Ava/Beatrice from Warrior Nun and Kara/Lena from CW's Supergirl.

I do think a lot of that is that those characters and stories are closer to where I am in age/place in life, while Life is Strange/Wednesday occupies a place where I reminisce on highschool didn'ts and wish-I-would'ves.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

There's a part of me where I see myself never finishing "To Know Yourself." I had originally planned it to be this 30+ chapter thing that takes place over the entire school year, and though I do have an outline of that, it's a huge prospect - especially seeing as how I do have other stories outlined in the LiS world that are significantly shorter.

I do think about it and go back to it, but it's a reality that's possible for sure.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

It's cool if it works. It's all relative on the perspective of the story and whether we are supposed to know what's being said and stuff.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

My first fandom was Inu-yasha and I was writing Sesshomaru/Miroku slashfics on fanfiction.net.

So yeah. I'm old.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

"A Common Cold."

I wrote this fic for a mutual who was sick at the time and it was because of this that we became friends. She's actually one of the people that tagged me to do this, so here's to you Zoey!!

I'll tag @dmmeeble, @fazedlight, and @daisychainsandbowties for this, but if you're scrolling down, see this, and hankering to do this as well, go for it!

[eyes-inthe-dark]

Hi Hello I actually make things sometimes

I don't know if anyone who follows me is interested in this stuff bc I very rarely post things from my own life, but I decided to be a little more active on here besides reblogging funny shit regarding my current hyperfixation.

So, here is the (incomplete) crafting diary of a neurodivergent trans person surviving christmas with the family and the dark and dreadful times (winter) in general by making shit! with my hands!

First: fiber stuff

I picked up tablet weaving over the last few months of 2023 and made my first pair of somewhat mistake-free shoelaces over the holidays! Only got the pattern completely right on the second try with the red but both laces now get to add a fun little detail to my shoes.

Next I tried a more complicated pattern and experimented a lot, hence the irregular pattern and troubleshooting at the start of the band. I'm now repurposing it as a camera strap and I learned a lot from it tho.

My current setup is basic cardboard tablets (I had to make extra ones so I had enough for the last band with 30 cards), tying the warp to something sturdy like a bookshelf, and sitting down with a backstrap belt on the other side of the room. I used thin wool yarn for this, which stuck to itself quite a lot, but not too much to be unmanagable, and I really like how the finished product feels.

If anyone's interested, I could make a longer post on how I made the shoelaces, I think it's a very beginner friendly project.

I managed to get my hands on a drop spindle and gave that a try, but I ran out of wool after making a very small amount of very chunky yarn and am currently working out where to best get sth local. It was fun tho!

I also finally finished the knitted scarf that has been in my wip pile for... approximately three years? I started it when I was still in school, feels like an eternity ago. It's just a simple (although very long) red wool scarf, but it keeps me nice and warm in this cold, harsh- *checks weather* ...5°C and neverending rain.

Next up: woodworking!

Noodled around with my grandpa's old dremel that we still had lying around, which resulted in this truly terrifying weapon:

Behold! I named it Toothling. It's great for poking friends and family when they least expect it.

This was more of a test run to see if it all still works and to try out doing small scale work with wood, now I gotta think of something fun to make. (I say, as if I didn't already have 50 different ideas)

Before that fuckery, I made this magnetic dice box/rolling tray for my lovely partner's birthday.

Though I don't feel like I can take credit for working the CNC magic on this, I did all the hands-on work with the sanding, assembling the magnets, shellac coating, and whatnot. I'm pretty sure wood is some sort of fruit tree, since it smells strongly of what I suspect might be plum or cherry.

Last but sure as fuck not least: embroidery

This I actually get professional instruction for at uni. I've kinda lost patience for it atm, but mostly because I cannot resist making unnecessarily complicated pieces with tiny little stitches and then am forced to finish it because I do actually kinda need to pass this class. My lecturer keeps telling me not to go so detailed, yet I have proven resistant to her good advice. But, I figured if I have to make two full pieces of embroidery to be graded on and put hours of work into, I might as well choose designs that I can turn into patches for my jacket:

Catha and Ruidus! I love me some big moon little moon imagery. The prompt was to incorporate most of the techniques/stitches we've learned so far. Added the little gold chain stitch around ruidus for the arcane latticework. It came out a little wonky shape wise, but I love it nonetheless.

And my most recent wip, a stained glass window design with the Ninth House skull and Gideon's sword behind it, to feed my current Locked Tomb obsession.

And that's it!