#I've been delving into Super after not wanting to deal with it but I'm actually enjoying it a lot

[shannonsketches]

Terrible news gang after the passing of Toriyama sensei my DBZ brainrot is back

[egg-emperor]

Sorry not sorry to be dark and sadistic as usual lol but like I so badly wish there were proper Eggman and Whisper interactions where they actually exchange words and it was just so fucked up. I've been interested since Whisper first appeared and seemed uncomfortable just seeing Eggman's logo before we even knew her deal. I like how she was ready to snipe him and how violent she was towards him when he was threatening to blow Tangle's brains out with his gun. Someone who has that type of trauma connected to him is a subject that needs to be explored more because I'm insane

There's been too much focus on Whisper and Mimic specifically for my liking when there's so much they could do with Eggman but still haven't yet. Yeah Mimic was the one to lure the Diamond Cutters to their demise but he was a hired gun. Eggman was the one who made the call and had his Shadow androids ready to tear them apart. And man do I fucking adore the underutilized Shadow androids too so that was super up my alley, along with Eggman ordering for people to be killed for him and the job being done successfully and them genuinely being dead because of him

With Eggman's tendency to mock those that he hurts, I can imagine how he'd tease and mock Whisper for the demise of her teammates and be a horrible smug sadistic bastard. Telling her how much of a pain they were during the war and needed to die. How he watched it happen on camera, how satisfying it was to see them go down at the hands of his androids in his locked down base, and how pathetic they looked in their last moments. How he wanted to assure every one of them was dead, having them counted one by one, but then finding that just one of the members was missing. Her.

And that dampened the good mood and left him with so much more to be desired! Because he won't be fully satisfied until she's dead too. His only regret was not hiring the right mercenary that would assure that they wouldn't miss a target and let them go so easily. Then he tries to hit her where it hurts by digging into that guilt that's still deep down in her. He's like "what kind of protector, guardian angel, and beacon of hope are you if you weren't able to protect them and save them from their demise?" and asks her if she really thinks she even deserves to live after she just let them die like that

His disturbing sickening grin only widens when she finally cracks and he sees the pain on her face and revels in it. Then he says that if Mimic couldn't be competent and man enough to finish the job himself then he'll do it himself with his own hands or guns and asks she's ready to finally join her friends in the afterlife! :) And all of this would have to be happening when Whisper doesn't have her Wispon at hand and is restrained otherwise he wouldn't get the chance to say all that otherwise she wouldn't have held back and would've just leapt at him and murdered him in seconds lol

Anyway yeah that's the kind of further angst with Whisper that I'm actually interested in seeing personally. I wish they'd delve into it with him instead of only Mimic please please please

[bbygirl-aemond]

Hi Bella's bf!

You've written a lot of different perspectives in SB, so I was wondering if you've had a favourite character to write, or a character that you've found more difficult to get their voice how you wanted.

Personally, Daemon seems like he wouldn't be the easiest to write, but I think you've portrayed him in a really authentic way.

(he says hello haha)

i'm so happy that you've enjoyed my daemon characterization! he's definitely complex to write, particularly when observed through other characters' perspectives. he's a highly reaction person and keeps his emotions so close to his chest it's often hard to figure out what's actually motivating him. he's also very good at projecting his own issues onto what goes on around him, so often his behavior seems out of place or extreme until you get the context of what's going on internally. think of the contrast in readers' reactions to him in chapter 8 vs chapter 9, for example. that being said, his actions are very directly tied to his emotions, so writing his povs isn't super tricky.

my favorite povs to write are usually the ones where i can delve more into the eerie/uncanny aspect of religion, mysticism, and magic. it adds another layer of complexity and intrigue to the writing and lets me play around more with dramatic language and metaphors. helaena's povs are always just steeped in that kind of stuff since she perceives space-time very differently, so she's always a joy to write. aemond also has his moments here, in scenes like those in chapters 10, 19, or the upcoming chapter 24.

the character that i have to be the most careful with, by far, is rhaenyra. part of this is just due to her position within the power dynamics, as she is ultimately the one in charge and so is the default "bad guy" when something happens that aemond doesn't like. she's also the one who's forced to make all of the tough decisions where there's no answer that will make everyone happy- the decisions that no one else wants to make, but which do have to be made. another part of this is the trick i pulled on y'all at the beginning, where i made her seem super unsympathetic through aemond's pov so you would empathize with his suspicion and hostility even though objectively she was consistently choosing the lesser of two evils.

but even after that i've found that her character's decisions (in stormbreak) get a somewhat disproportionate amount of criticism compared to characters on team green, but also compared to other male characters on team black. i really expected daemon to be much less popular than rhaenyra in this fic, because he stands by all of her unpopular decisions and was equally awful at dealing with the problematic power dynamics with aemond. and he has so many additional red flags that rhaenyra doesn't: his violent outbursts, his bloodthirstiness and ambivalence towards the other greens, his very transparent valyrian supremacy, etc. but people have been very sympathetic to his character, so i actually don't have to be nearly as careful with him as i'd anticipated given reactions to rhaenyra. i have to be a lot more explicit in making rhaenyra sympathetic than the other members of the main trio in order to have the same effect on readers overall, so writing her character (both within her own pov and in other characters' povs) takes a loooong time! it's an interesting challenge for sure.

[brassknucklespeirs]

I love your writing! May I be bestowed with the knowledge of little facts about your wips while we wait? There's no rush and your readers know that you have a life outside of this hellsite.

oh wow i cant even begin to explain how good this kind of comment makes me feel, thank you so much for your support oh my gosh

And why yes of course you can, let me delve into the random world that is my drafts... (this definitely turned into more than just little facts but...oh well)

Trust Me I Know | Ronald Speirs x fem!reader

This one is kinda definitely one of my favourite drafts I have atm, there's not a lot actually written down for it but a lot of stuff in my head. It's a pining!speirs fic where he has no bloody clue how to deal with his feelings for the reader so he just kinda pretends he doesn't have any but it doesn't work the way he thinks it does. The reader, being too observant of him for her own good (because she too is quite interested in the lad), notices all the little looks he tries not to give her and the way he hovers in a weird places between too close to be just officer and soldier but too far away for it to be considered anything else. One day one of the men notices the way his gaze lingers on the woman and says to her "You know, I think Speirs might have a little thing for you Y/N. He seems to be trying to burn a hole through my skull with the way he's glaring at me." And she just kinda chuckles in amusement and looks Speirs dead in the eye before saying to the one who she's speaking to "Trust me, I know."

Forever | George Luz x fem!reader

This one is the big sad. Like it's going to tear peoples hearts out and it does not have a happy ending at all. It's framed around the song 'Forever' by Lewis Capaldi, especially the lyrics "nobody said that we would last forever, that doesn't mean we didn't try to get there" the first half to three quarters is going to be super sweet fluff and showing different stages of their relationship and then the end is just....it's gonna hurt i'm sorry to say

Big Spoon, Little Spoon | Joe Liebgott x fem!reader

Ahhhhh this one is going to be fun. It's a comedic fluffy fic to lighten the mood since pretty much every other fic i've written somehow involves trauma in detail. This one is definitely going to be a bit more lighthearted like my 'He Definitely Doesn't Hate Me' Speirs fic. Short and sweet likely. It's based on a night out where the reader and Joe's relationship is shown to be very fun and full of teasing. At the end of the night, Joe asks the reader if she's ready to head to bed and she turns to him in front of a table full of the other men and says "Can I be the little spoon for once?". He pretends to brush it off like it's one big joke and says to her "You're lucky I fucking love you, you pain in the ass." So that all the men can hear, before leaning down to whisper in her ear "but yes, just this once"

Glorious Basterds | Ron Speirs

EE this one has been imprinted in my brain since before i even started writing but i just know i have to get it right or it's going to drive me insane. It's a Band of Brothers/Inglorious Basterds crossover that i'm quite excited for. I'm still unsure at this point whether or not i'm making it a reader insert or a OC because as i said in a post the other day, this one is detailed and descriptive of many not nice things such as the main character being a bit nuts and very aggressively murdering nazis and it is going to be very descriptive of gorey subjects (as they do in the movie). Pretty much she's had her entire family killed and is very much in the middle of her revenge era. It takes place around Bastogne and onwards. The current main part of the first part of the fic (which at this point is going to be several parts i think) is the basterds helping with the capture of Foy. After this, there is an interrogation of some Nazi officers that had been running from the basterds as they know they have information they want. The main character is known as Azrael which is the name of the angel of death, and most people don't realise she's a woman until they see her in person. She's got impeccable aim and is known for being pretty creative with the way she kills people. In this one specific part she is the one doing the interrogation of the three officers and she kinda picks them off one by one in different ways while easy company kinda watches in complete awe. The story will follow mostly her but will include a relationship with speirs as it progresses

Hide and Seek | Joe Toye x fem!reader

This one is pretty cute ngl. It's set in the pub in england after they've come back from D-Day. Joe doesn't talk about his wife much to anyone because he likes to keep the idea of her to himself because she is just the most beautiful being on earth to him. It's just another fun little fic where she surprises him in the pub as she joined the new female trooper squad and it's gonna be a lot of fluff and a lot of fun as she gets introduced to all the boys who are super confused at this random stunning woman who's somehow made joe smile nonstop since she's arrived

See You Later | Ron Speirs x fem!reader

This is a mix of sad and fluffy. So the reader and Ron were not necessarily together but very much in love all throughout the war. Once it gets to the end and he says he wants to stay, she fights the feeling of wanting to beg him to come home with her and lets him go. They decide its for the best they don't keep in touch or anything because it would just be too hard. Now this one is gonna be an interesting one for me ngl cause i often write my fic based during the war and not after so it's gonna be a goodie. I've made it where after the war, the reader ends up becoming a famous performer and she gets a surprise birthday party thrown for her and all of the company are there except ron it would seem. But she gets a few very big surprises as the night goes on. One part of this fic includes the reader breaking down to her mother on the floor of their living room and says to her "I lost him mommy, and i don't think i'm ever going to get him back." As you can tell, it's def gonna be a good mix of the big sad but it ends on a good note i promise.

Weirdly, this one came to me while listening to the Moulin Rouge soundtrack, obviously something about Ewan McGregor singing love songs gets the cogs in my brain moving.

It's In The Way You Move | Dick Winters x fem!reader

Idk what's gonna go on in this one quite yet but i know it's going to be sweet. It's like the story of someone who's pretty emotionally unavalible but finds comfort in her friend and fellow officer Dick Winters. Things progress weirdly and they know they both love each other and he's said it several times but she hasn't. It's kinda just a story of how you come to realise that you don't always have to say the words 'i love you' to show that you love someone wholeheartedly.

Sometimes It's Not Enough | Lipton x fem!reader

This fic is going to be one expressing the story of someone who's fallen in love but has little to no level of physical touch as a love language just because they've never really known that kind of love before. It follows reader and Lip through a long relationship that they both have to grow through as it's quite hard for each of them having different ways of showing their love. One day the reader kinda loses it and just crawls into Lip's lap for a cuddle. It's def fluffy, and shows how love doesn't always have to include PDA and excessive touching for it to be deep and real.

I also have more but they are barely developed at all and there's really not much to mention about them quite yet.

[defiantbird]

Aight I finished Azure Gleam. Here are some disorganized thoughts.

TL;DR it was ok. Best part was the character interactions, gameplay and storyline were meh.

It wasn't terrible. I was glad to find that it was more "what if this other stuff happened instead?" instead of "what if they never met Byleth?"

I don't love the gameplay. It's alright but it got pretty tedious, though admittedly I think I leveled too fast and things got too easy or something.

The story was underwhelming. As much as it was nice to see everyone get good things, it just wasn't compelling. It's great that Dimitri got revenge and never had a feral stage, but it didn't actually feel resolved at all. What made AM compelling was how he had to learn that revenge wasn't going to heal him, and that he would be wrestling with his mental illness forever. The moment at the end where he tells Byleth that he's going to visit his loved ones graves for the first time in years? So good! It's him saying that recovery is a process and he can grieve his loved ones instead of being terrified of their judgement! So like...great that he got answers in Hopes but I don't feel like he actually got better?

Shez was equally meh. She felt like a generic protagonist, almost annoyingly plucky. I just didn't get attached to her at all.

As mentioned, the character interactions were the best. It was nice to see the Faerghus 4 really addressing their trauma together, along with Dedue. It was awesome seeing Duscur soldiers in camp and being able to talk to them and get their perspective a little.

I was expecting more of Sothis. She was there for a bit and seemed to have strong feelings on things, but we never got more of an explanation of her knowledge of Epimenides. Also, when you defeat Thales, Rhea speaks about cleansing the world herself...I'm guessing she has similar beef with humans but plans to fix it more through control than through destruction? Or is she talking specifically about Agarthans? Idk still a lot of questions on all of that.

I'm interpreting Edelgard's behavior as like...having reverted to her child-self. It was really interesting but I wish they delved more into it. It honestly seemed strange that when she seemed to remember Dimitri, he just decided to walk away and not deal with it. I feel like he's cared about that a lot and he gave up on it really quick in the name of forgetting the past.

Other thoughts aside from things I've already expressed elsewhere-

- Byleth my beloved. Her interactions with Jeralt were my fave part of the game.

- Jeralt just being like "Yeah Byleth's weird. She's my world tho. If I die try to be her friend aight?"

- So much Faerghus lore, with the more casual stuff being most enjoyable, like Rodrigue talking about how people get super competitive in snowball fights.

- More Glenn characterization ❤️ His letter was everything I've wanted about him.

- Child: Did you see that big funny knight who's carrying entire carts of stuff?

Yuri:...oh my fucking god Dimitri are you serious

- Felix has a cat now it's canon

- Also canonized: Dimitri falling asleep facedown on his paperwork and people having heart attacks thinking he's dead

- Shez: Let's relax in the woods!

Dimitri: Haha someone could easily jump out and stab me in the back 😬

Anyway, idk if I'm gonna play the other routes after a break or just watch them at some point.

- Are we serious with Jeralt being like "you might have been a student or Garreg Mach...cause it's not like you're qualified to be a teacher lol" and Byleth like "hmmm"

- Ngl, I felt like Sylvain was stripped of a lot of his character. Again, this was long the lines of "glad everyone is happy but now there's no conflict"

[cryotome]

Some thoughts on the first 4 routes of Olympia Soirée

Ok, I've finally finished the first 4 routes, good and bad endings (though I have yet to check all the memoirs) and I figured I'd do a little review before I move onto Himuka and Akaza.

My play order wasn't the recommended one since I just wanted to start with the boy I vibed with in the common route (Kuroba!), so I ended up doing Kuroba - Riku - Yosuga - Tokisada. I wouldn't say it ruined my experience - if anything I liked doing Tokisada's route last as it delved deeper into some of the games' antagonists arcs.

For people who want to go from the least to most emotionally heavy routes, the recommended Riku-Tokisada-Yosuga-Kuroba order is the best option. It should be said that all routes so far deal with some heavy topics of discrimination, fantasy racism/classism, rigid traditional gender roles and so on, and some routes feature dubcon and SA, so that's something to be aware of if you're thinking of picking this up.

With that said, here's some opinions!

The common route was surprisingly lengthy and didn't have any choices, however I really enjoyed it and thought it was well paced. I enjoyed just experiencing the story without stressing out about which guy I would end up with. The journey of Olympia from "a doll" to a person capable of making friends, learning about the world and relating to others was great and she got more development in the common route than Steam Prison's Cyrus got in the entire game (I can't help but compare these games as the premise is similar) Like everyone else I did get annoyed by repetitive flashbacks - they weren't quite as common in character routes but happened enough to be irritating. I'm also not super keen on the sidekick (sorry Daifuku) but I realise Olympia needed someone to talk at. Plus, their backstory was quite cute.

I did find Olympia's personality a little inconsistent at times, as she went from being forward and assertive (and fun) in Riku's and Tokisada's route to a typical timid MC with Kuroba and Yosuga.

As for LIs, I'm gonna discuss spoilers in all 4 initial routes, so don't click if you haven't played them all :)

Ok, here we go.

Riku

PRECIOUS BABY.

Seems like many enjoyed Riku's route, I did too. In a classical tsundere fashion he made a terrible first impression, but after seeing his softer side in Kuroba's route I was intrigued and wanted to learn more about him. (on that note, can we talk about how he's almost absent in everyone's routes? I guess unlike someone like Kuroba he doesn't make for a fun quirky side character, but still..would've been nice) I feel like the story lingered for ages on Olympia trying to figure out his identity but once Riku became an actual character in his story things really picked up.

I loved his backstory, loved his chemistry with Olympia and loved seeing him grow as a person. That final conflict resolution was extremely random (RANDOM WAVE just washed the bad guy away? alright), but I'm starting to think none of the writers actually know how to conclude a story because it just seems to be a Thing that happens with everyone.

Tokisada

I left Tokisada for last because I really couldn't get myself to play a route with a guy that looks 12. In the end, I did like his route - I loved the moment he accepted his role as a professinal wifeguy. Go you, Tokisada :') His CGs were really nice and steamy but they definitely aged him up (he even sounded different) during those moments for things to be less weird, which makes me wonder...why make him look and sound like a little kid in the first place? I know he's on his coming of age arc, but still.

One of the things I found most fascinating in this route was Kanan and Kaina's relationship and Kanan's revelation that a certain bodypart fell off from haku?? And i was like..no...it can't be..and then I got to the bad ending. And apparently there's more on that in the memoir which I've not read. As expected, the conflict was kinda poorly resolved with Kanan never really getting the punishment he deserves. This game really doesn't like killing people in good endings (unless they don't have sprites i guess)

I would like to nominate Bad Ending with Kanan here as the most fucked up one in the entire game 8) I love a bad ending that isn't just sad, but also kinda twisted and makes you go "wait what...HOW?? WHY???" and that one was definitely it.

Yosuga

Ah, Yosuga. I wanted to like you so much. You were so fun in everyone else's routes. Alas I'm afraid Yosuga works better as a wingman for me.

I mean, I suspected he has a dark backstory and I actually liked the actual resolution with The Baddies not actualy being The Baddies. And I liked his connection to Olympia through Tsukuyomi.

But the incident on Tennyu island, and then him holding an actual grudge over women of the white killing some purple guy seemed so illogical and gross and not consistent with the rest of his personality. I could understand him having a deathwish and being depressed and traumatised, but it could have been handled better - maybe if Olympia actually stood up to him? This is also where Olympia's "hair colour change for yes, murder for no" as a replacement for concent became pretty tiresome.

There were some touching moments later but I never quite pieced together what he's like as a person in the end.

Weirdly enough I really liked one of the bad endings. It was..probably one of the spiciest scenes in the entire game so far?? I swear to god, Olympia actually voices her wishes for once and then they fuck and I guess she kills him off-camera which doesn't seem like her, but also. It was hot, so I'll allow it. Sorry, Yosuga.

Kuroba

Favourite Boy in a Non-Favourite Route.

Like I said, I loved Kuroba since his very first appearance. I'm in the minority in that I like his design the most (idk i like his short hair, makes him stand out? and his expressions are so cute? and he's handsome more than he's cute?? also The Voice) and i like flirty characters as long as being flirty isn't the only thing I've got going for them. In Kuroba's case the flirtiness was definitely just a superficial trait and he was funny and smart and capable. His first half of the route was a lot of fun with all their little courtship and dates, and then... it kinda got ruined.

I still don't know why Kuroba had to dramatically proclaim how he's using Olympia. I thought he was roped into it but I don't think he was? And after the whole Nagusa thing happened he was really inappropriately posessive/aggressive which pissed me off a bit. He definitely redeemed himself later and that CG with him kneeling in front of Olympia was adorable. As always the story did not resolve in a 100% satisfying way with Nagusa not getting what he deserves - it made me pretty angry.

I would be ok with Nagusa living if he got Tokijikutan Ne treatment for his haku. Surviving and yet losing every stupid superficial thing he cared about? That'd be amazing. But no, I guess we can't have that. (I actually forgot exactly what happened with him towards the end...guess I should've been taking notes)

Looking back at it, Kuroba's bad ends are my least favourites too, I guess I just don't find getting murdered very sexy, but i guess some people might be into it. I JUST THINK HE DESERVED BETTER.

I should also mention that since Douma was very much positioned as the Big Bad in the common route and Kuroba was my first, I did believe Olympia when she didn't want to trust him. I fully expected Douma to have some kind of diabolical plan when he asked Kuroba to murder Nagusa and I was excited to see what it was when I did the bad ends. Of course, no such plan existed, and now that I've played through other routes I know that Douma's just a grumpy ol' dad who gives no fucks. (Unless we're gonna learn more about him in the remaining 2 routes) Anyway, this just makes that whole resolution so much dumber in retrospect. I feel like Kuroba's best ending never really came to fruition and instead we just got an ok one.

I can only hope for a fandisk to give me more Kuroba content v_v

And now, to finish the last remaining routes. Not looking forward to Himuka as he's just way too young and feminine looking for my tastes, and I just can't imagine CGs fixing that the way they did with Tokisada. But I hope the Plot will make up for it. Akaza on the other hand...I have high hopes for him :D Fingers crossed!

[chrfaith]

template credit: X

*waves* bonjour & bon jovi everyone! i'm really stoked to be here, as i've been eyeing the premise of this group for quite some time, and finally found the courage to bring a muse in! and what a messy lovely muse she is. no but seriously i have a soft spot for her and am super excited to write her with you all! so if you'd like to read more about this rebel with a cause who's still struggling with loving herself in some complex ways, pls do click the cut below for some quick info and important links that will delve more into detail! as always, if any plots interest you, or if you'd just like to plot something based on chemistry / muse personality, feel free to ♡ this post, and i'll im you to chat! ( oriewortireo unfortunately i'm a boomer trapped in a 23 yo's body who doesn't use discord 🤡 )

tw: child abuse / abandonment, drug & alcohol use

so faith's full biography can be found here, you can view some stats over here, and finally, there's some wanted plots on this page right here! below is a slightly condensed version of her backstory so you can get the gist of everything! :)

faith had a very abusive upbringing at the hands of her mother, who was a rather famous actress who'd made the transition from thailand to south korea, and become a huge star in their film and drama industry.

despite the woman's fame and success, she had a horrible reputation among her peers due to the underhanded and downright cruel things she'd do to others in the profession to get herself ahead.

after faith's father was discovered having an affair with the family's maid, he left the home behind as well as his daughter. faith's mother's anger only got more intense, at having her perfect family image destroyed in the public eye.

her daughter bore the brunt of this anger, of course, as she was the only target the woman had left. she'd found a way to blame faith for the separation and eventual divorce, as it seemed to easiest way for someone so vitriolic to deal with rejection.

faith eventually came to believe the vile things her mother told her, developing an unhealthy dislike for herself and an appetite for self destruction as she entered her teens and began attending hannam.

she'd go to parties she was too young for; drinking, inhaling or swallowing any hallucinogen anyone would offer her, just wanting to feel anything but her mother's tight, painful grip on her wrist. wanting to hear something other than morbid threats, teardowns and insults was essentially the only thing keeping her going. chasing the next high to cope with the crushing lows.

on one particular weekend, she and a couple of friends from hannam high school snuck into a nightclub. after some illegitimately attained cocktails and a dare, the group took over the dj booth while the dj was in the bathroom.

this was the night faith fell in love with the idea of being a dj. the crowd, the music; sounds filling her ears besides her mother's shrill voice? it was the escapism she'd always been searching for.

it was through her journey to learn the craft that she met the person who'd have a huge impact on her life, for better and for worse.

he was the lead singer of a fairly popular band, even though faith wasn't overly familiar. he seemed sweet and nice; like another escape to her. he was helpful with her musical aspirations, making her feel like she really mattered. she eventually was even able to book paid jobs at clubs thanks to his influence.

and there were a couple of happy years out of it, during which faith thought she'd finally found a light beacon in the storm she'd been navigating since she was a child. the only thing that seemed strange was his insistence on keeping things a secret.

there turned out to be a reason for it; he had a penchant for keeping a whole slew of girls in the wings to satiate his desires. one of them happened to be an actress, and things had gone public on a gossip news site; this is precisely where faith had the privilege of learning the news.

after breaking things off, it was all faith could do to pour herself into her deejaying and become a fvcking badass who put herself first (sometimes). she became something of a local celebrity in seoul on the club circuit, and even took to making original music rather than just remixing the works of others.

her diligence earned her some local airplay on a small electronica radio station, and hearing her own original song emanating from an actual, real radio station was the most awash in true confidence she'd ever felt.

sadly just moments later, she had the wind knocked out of her when she stumbled upon another song while changing the dials; one by her ex's band. the song was very clearly about her, with the euphemistic title 'i had faith', and it was full of intimate references to her and the things they did together. it also contained allusions to some of the darkest secrets she'd told him, and taunts about how he'd made her everything she is. she was disgusted.

it destroyed faith and rebuilt her at the same time. she decided she now existed solely to prove that she could achieve any and everything on her own; that she didn't need some fuckboy's influence to see her dreams come true.

she now has a pretty nice apartment, not too far from her old stomping grounds at hannam high school. she still struggles with believing she deserves love, or anything, really but she's a great deal closer to that goal than she was at the start!

[shinahbee]

October Favorites 2020!

Hello!

i'm going to start bringing these favorites of the month from my deviantart to here on tumblr. Hopefully you will find something good out of the things that I have been liking recently, please leave in the comments anything that you have been liking this month ( books, manga, anime, tv shows...etc) I have been a little uninspired for a while, but I'm still working on a few new digital art pieces as well as continuing my painting hobby, so there's a lot of content on the way!

okay so on to the things that I've been liking this month.

So if you've seen my latest digital art " who's baby is it?" I have been delving into web toons which I have not read other than mo dao zu shi since I watched the anime and It just suddenly stopped after season 2. I thought reading the web toon would answer some of those questions  i had. It lead me to reading a bunch of webtoons all in the shounen ai category for some reason...lol. and I've been really liking some of the stories, Until this point web toons never really interested me since I've been reading manga since I was younger , so i've been used to just seeing the black and white pages of art, since web toons have coloured pages, it makes me appreciate the effort they used to colour every panel, so a lot of work went into these so i appreciate it for what it is even if the story inst great.

let me preface by saying that even though i'm delving into BL, i've been exposed to yaoi ever since I was in high school by one of my best friends, she lent me her favorite anime which was " gravitation" and all remember was wanting a man that was like yuki...lol. don't we all?

since then I have been reading some yaoi manga...only ones that are NOT predicated on sexual violence and abuse, which I know is prevalent in this category, I just don't like it and the message it sends, so i avoid that all together.

unless of course it has a particular message it wants to convey, not glorifying it. if that makes sense.

okay so here are my recommendations, i'll give a very brief summary of each of them

Manga/Manhwa:

----------------------------------------------

Who's baby is it? 

- “a man named yi yun wanted to be an actor and is part of an acting company for several years and still was not successful, apparently it was because he was born with really bad luck, so to change his life perspective he decided that he wanted to be a surrogate father and donate his sperm to a surrogate mother in order to have a child that is his blood. So he and his child were living happily together through yi yuns work periods and suddenly there is a man that claims he is the child's actual blood related father and wanted to take the child into his custody.”

please read the summary I have in my fan art, I've wrote my thoughts on this manhwa.

To be or not to be

-  “A company president diagnosed with cancer and died has been transmigrated into his favorite novel, where he was reborn as the antagonistic emperor that the main character defeats in the end, on top of which the main lead is currently the captive of said emperor, so in order to survive he will do anything to protect the protagonist and make sure he stays alive inside the novels universe.”

oh to be or not to be that is the question...lol. it really is. currently is is one of my favorites, I like how modern day people  can look at the acts of history and modify certain things so that it would less likey repeat itself for the worse, we need this sort of mentality at this moment...

Social temperature

- “Song Yuan is indifferent when dealing with people he is an elite student at T- university as a science major, one day his friend started to question his sexuality and set him up with a month trial dating app as a joke, as soon as he went to delete the app on his phone, he was suddenly matched with a boy named "Mu", who turns out to be his classmate/ rival in his science program, his named is Xaio Mu , he is an exchange student abroad and got into this elite science program, hoping to meet new friends he approached song yuan and proceed to converse with him only to be ridiculed by him saying that he wears too much perfume and it made him sick so then he became the class social outcast.But after using the app to converse with "Mu"...song yuan became curious as to what he is actually like...using the fake name and bio of " Andrew " they start to get to know each other more.”

omg , this is triggering for me, since Mu is basically me a few years ago when I was also in a medical science program minus the talking on tinder thing lol, I felt as though everyone in that program was in it for themselves and I didn't not like the how people think they are entitled to everything...that's why i'm not in it no more.lol. there are a few plot holes in the story that I don't really get but other than that I really like this story I read the chapters that are out so far like 3 times cause I'm waiting for the rest to be translated. I also actually read the Novel by the same author of the manhua called " social outcast" so if you just want to read it in text format please read that novel instead, I like the novel up to a point and then it didn't really make sense after wards..lol.

so i can't say that i recommended it completely. Also Mu's character design I really like, thus i'm going to make a fan art of him soon...omg he's so beautiful, i'm in love lol.

Salad Days  ( tang liu zang) 

- “This is the story between a young innocent ballet boy and a passionate, determined boxing boy. The two met at the children’s palace, and since then, they have grown up together supporting each other. May there be hardships, may there be obstacles, yet they never stopped pursuing their dreams. The beauty of the salad days is the sweat from the hard work and the bonding of friendship. Although they have completely different paths set up for them, what never changes is their beautiful friendship.”

wow this story so far is really beautiful, I was in ballet for 3  years so it was slightly relatable to me, I feel like the over all message is that people sacrifice a lot for their dreams and if you are very passionate about it, there's no on that can really stop you, the only one that can stop you is you. I can't wait to see this story progress further  

K-dramas:

------------------------------------------

it okay to not be okay - this probably has been mentioned as everyone's favorite, but rightfully so, I really like ko mun young's character as a person who seems like an assertive and powerful woman, but is suffering from a social disorder. and how moon gang tae has to not only deal with mental patients at his job but also his older brother being autistic, he himself is suffering from mental illness. this drama is  something not a lot of dramas portray in dealing with mental illness and how the patients/ loved ones  are feeling when watching them go through it all. I liked the story and the message  and it made me cry in every episode, so fair warning...have tissues beside you as you watch.

itaewon class- I was not going to watch this because of the mixed reviews but I did any ways, and it was really good, a really good depiction of how money and power isn't the end all be all , and being happy  is really the best revenge you can get, it also addresses racism and prejudice on one character and sexism on a trans-gendered woman. I also think this is a story that protrays something that really hasn't been exposed to in k-dramas specifically. It depends on your morals and what you understand so far in your life wether you would like this drama or not, so i understand the mixed reviews that it gets, but for me it was a really good story.

Anime/ TV shows:

---------------------------------------------

I don't have any anime recommendations this month mainly cause I have not been watching any, but there are some that i might watch soon  so I will list those below, let mew know if any of you have seen them and should I be watching them.

- Nobelese

-yasha hime ( inuyasha  new series)

-Haikyuu  new season

-heavens official blessing ( same author of mo dao zushi) - just started watching

-scum bag saving system- just started watching

Music :

----------------------------------

so I have just been listening to a lot of OSTs,

I really recommend the itaewon class soundtrack, all the songs are so good!

my favorite on is " crush- No words "

also my friend has been sending me NCT  and super M practice  videos so I've been listening to their music as well, please listen to make a wish by NCT U, it has been stuck in my head and I cant get it out...lol.

------------------------------

that's all for this October faves summary. please comment below if anything interested you for the month of October, I would also like to read your recommendations as well, please also take care of yourselves especially now with all that's escalating in the world.

take care!

sheena

[petekaos]

Hello! I just spent the last hour reading all your fics and, while this is something I've always wanted to do, it gave me a sudden burst of motivation to start writing my own fics but I'm staring at my word document and I'm so?? I don't have any experience writing things apart from essays for school and I was wondering if you had any tips for a complete beginner? How do you plan out your own fics? How long does it take you?

hi hi nonnie!! i don’t know when you sent this (probably when i was asleep / offline) but i’m so so glad you enjoyed my fics enough for it to motivate you, that’s so sweet! :’)

honestly my tips would be to write about things you like. this seems so obvious, but if you’re writing fic, it’s important to first realise that you’re writing it for yourself and not for an audience, and as long as it makes you happy, that’s all that matters. if you write about what you think an audience would like... then there’s no passion! your enthusiasm can and will draw people in more than a 5k coffee shop au you didn’t really have much interest in writing. there are certain aspects of a character or situations you want to see them in or plot holes you want to explore, and those are the things you should focus on. the way i write my fics is that i hone in on one part i want to explore, and expand upon that, thinking of meaningful scenes that document growth and progress to get across my point. so -- in my fics there has to be a general red thread that ties the fic together, a point, a feeling i want the reader to be left with at the end. for example, in there’s an art to honesty, my petekao fic / kao character study, the red thread is about kao tackling intimacy and pda as well as finding his own strength after coming out to his friends. i deep dived into his character and how he feels along the course of the fic, and how it changes naturally. points of conflict are necessary to keep the reader hooked and move the plot along in my opinion (unless you’re writing like a couple of thousand words of fluff), whether it be internal or external. most of my conflicts are internal because i write a lot of character studies, but you get my point! the best balance is when you have both -- going back to that fic, the internal conflict is kao still feeling as though he has to hide in front of his friends, and the external conflict is his mother not knowing he’s gay and in a relationship and therefore making comments to suggest the opposite, as minor as this conflict is.

if you’re a plotter, i suggest writing down all your ideas you would like to write at some point, and seeing how they tie in together. i’m gonna keep my petekao fic as an example here as it’s fresh in my mind, but i wanted to write about kao dealing with being open, about pete being a supportive boyfriend, about kao and pete’s dad having a talk, about the cool gang being the Best, and about kao coming out to his mother and sister in a way that’s different from dark blue kiss. now, i had a couple of other ideas that eventually ended up being scrapped for this fic at least. so it’s all about figuring out what your point is and how you wanna get that across, before delving into the actual writing. that’s tricky -- what works for me may not work for you. i usually have a loose idea of the scenes i want to write and then just sort of let the characters take me away and get in the zone. there are certain pieces of dialogue i want to include that i also write down to get to.

the way i plan my fics and certain scenes out is by having what’s called a leitmotif. basically, it’s a recurring theme or metaphor that pops up during the entire piece of work that ties everything back together. sticking with the petekao fic, something that keeps it all together is the metaphor of the closed doors and kao not knowing what to do with his hands, where to put them. i mention the closed doors as a symbol that turns into open doors at the end. so, when i loosely plan my fic out, i keep that in mind and mention it again and again so the reader is unconsciously drawn back into the original plotline. normally, for oneshots and fics like that and the others i’ve got on my ao3, i don’t plan... all too much. it’s only for multichaptered ones, where i need more callbacks and threads to tie the plot together, that i really go through the scenes in detail. 

as for how long it takes me... hm. it depends! there’s an art to honesty took me... around a week, when i really got down to writing it, but keep in mind i’ve been super busy for the past week. my feet are drawn to you, my ramking fic / ram character study, took me i think around 5-6 days? i bulk wrote the last 5k of that one. everyone’s looking for someone to hold, my manboss fic, took me like 2 days because i had free time and just conked it all out. and he got fight stories to tell, my sarawat character study / sarawatine fic, took me i think around 3-4 days too. so on average, i tend to write pretty fast once i stop procrastinating and getting distracted and in the zone, especially when it’s a oneshot. i tend to get bored and focused on other things pretty quickly (thanks adhd) but the point is: it doesn’t matter how long it takes you, as long as you enjoy it!

my most important piece of advice? don’t overthink it. figure out what aspects you want to explore, what characters you love, find something to tie it all together and start writing! plot it out if you’re a plotter. but writing is all about practice, and it takes a while before you figure out what’s right for you and what works for you. i still don’t know it myself! anyone can write, and i’m looking forward to seeing your fics, and i hope this helped! feel free to send me another ask or dm me if you need anything or if you want me to look over your fic or writing, i’d be glad to!

[jpat82]

Secret World

Chapter 9

     "Hey Echo!" He called out, waving his hand in the air even though I had already seen him. I sped up a bit, throwing a casual glance over my shoulder toward the car only to see Happy shaking his head as he pulled away.

    "Hey Peter." I smiled back and stopped as I got closer. "How was school?"

    "Meh, it was school. You know how that goes." He shrugged as I followed him away from the building down the street. "How was the rest your of night?"

    "Actually, that was the most sleep I've gotten in a couple years." I chuckled softly, looking down at the ground.

    "Seriously?" He asked taken back as the both we walked on the sidewalk, the exhaust from cars passing us lingering in the air.

    "Yeah, I've been on my own for a while." I admitted, I could feel my heart slowly started to speed up. I crossed my arms in front of my chest out of instinct.

     "Really? Like what did you do?" He asked, looking over at me. I bit my bottom lip, trying even think of where to start. "You know what?"

    Suddenly he darted in front of me, causing me to abruptly stop so I didn't walk into him. I stared at him as he grinned at me, he had his thumbs under the straps of his backpack giving him almost a comical look.

     "Let's go have fun, we can go an arcade or movie.. or we can just walk around. Whatever you want." He beamed, I couldn't help but smile back.

    "Peter, I don't have any money. And the idea of movie where it's dark doesn't exactly thrill me." I replied with a sigh, he gave a small shake of his head as he pull one hand away from his backpack and held it up.

     "I have some money, and as I said I know an arcade. We can play some games, and just hang out." He told me. "So what do you say?"

    I bit on my lip trying not to grin, it had been years since I had had a care free day. One that wasn't interrupted by the thought of the shadow creatures or running from people. At least here nobody knew me, here I had someone that maybe I could rely on. I nodded my head to him and watched his smile grow.

     "Arcade it is." He hooked his head and stepped off to the side.

    We wound through the streets, Peter talked about the various studies he was going through. The kid was smart, hella smart. Making me feel kind of left out on the things I missed having been pulled out of school when I was. The fact I never actually made it to high school.

Peter was very animated as he talked, his face always so full expression.

"So, I have a question." I spoke up, his eyes wide as he walked backwards in front me.

"What's up?" He replied.

"So that first day, the one where you found me in the street." I started, braving myself to put myself out there a bit more.

"You mean the one where you called me Spiderling." He nodded.

"I looked up the snap, as I'm sure you could tell. Are you the guy they called Spider-Man in the news reports?" I asked, I could see the neon sign behind him that shouted movies and arcade.

"Don't tell anybody." He quickly stated, stopping in his tracts.

"Peter, who exactly am I going to tell? The people I stayed with last night? I'm sure they know, am I right?" I replied.

"Okay, maybe you have a point. But, I mean, if you run into anybody you know." He winked and gave me a nudge as we crossed the street.

    "Ha ha, web boy." I shot back, following him inside.

     "So, all joking aside, what was your world like?" He asked, we walked around the arcade, kids loitered about, the dings and music of the games played over the music coming out of the speakers. The lights were slightly dimmer but it wasn't dark inside.

     "Depressing. There was war everywhere for the most part, I guess not to much different from here. Besides there isn't any aliens or robots to blame it on. Super hero's don't exist, I wish they did." I shook my head as he dropped some change into a pin ball machine, he offered to let me play first by motioning. "Let me see how it works."

     "You don't know how to play pin ball?" He asked, his eyes widening again and he purposely dropped his jar lower.

     "Never had a chance. I've been on the run for the last four years." I shrugged.

     "Alright, you watch me, and tell me more about your world. Then you try? Deal?" He stuck his hand out, I took and shook it.

    "Deal." I replied, watching as the ball rolled into place.

    "So can I ask though why you've been on the run the last four years?" He asked, his eyes glued downward as he pulled a leveler back and let go causing the ball to shoot forward.

     "Well, it’s cause I can see things. Like I told you, but also.. I see creatures, these things in the shadows. My mom couldn't raise me because she didn't know how to deal with it so after sending me to mental institutions she sent me to live with my Aunt and Uncle." I told him, watching as he hit the buttons on the side, causing the little paddles inside the machine to flip any time the ball came near. "She was awesome, she was the one to give me the name Echo. Unfortunately late one night, someone shot her, the P.D. said it was a mugging gone wrong but I just couldn't deal with it."

     "I'm sorry Echo, the same kind of thing happened to my uncle." Peter replied, his words were sincere, as he continued to watched what he was doing.

    "It was about that time word got around school, and the some guys from the government showed up at our apartment. They talked my Uncle into me going with them, and they ran a bunch of tests on me. Late one night, I had just about had it." I tried to explain, trying not delve to far into the past where it hurt. "I had been screaming in the metal room they locked me in, and went to test the door knob and it was unlocked. It was weird, the entire hall was empty and dark, it's the only time I didn't the shadow creatures but I didn't wait around."

     By this point Peters game had stopped and he was leaning his hip against the machine and just listened to me. Nodding while I spoke.

    "I took off, got a prepaid debt card, panhandled, did some illegal stuff, like opening cards in others peoples names. Did everything I could to stay alive. I was squatting in a house for a bit, but.." I shrugged, I took a deep breath as I looked around. He stepped to the side, grabbing my arm and pulled me toward the machine.

“Let me just say, if aliens wind up implanting eggs in my chest or something and I eat one of you, I'm sorry." I heard his voice crystal clear even though his lips weren’t moving. Peter raised his eye brow as I must’ve made a face.

“I don't want another single pop culture reference out of you for the rest of the trip. You understand?" I recognized the voice as the one that said Spiderling before.

“I'm trying to say that something is coming.”

“Seriously, you made a reference to Aliens?” I asked chuckling as I stared at him.

“What?” He asked genuinely confused.

“You were talking about eggs implanting in your chest.” I giggled even harder. “I gotta know what brought that on.”

“Oh, when I was on a spaceship in space.” He replied dead serious as he moved behind me to the other side. “Me and Mr Stark and a bunch of other guys were fighting aliens on their ship or donut, whatever it was.”

“That must of been intense.” I replied looking at him wide eyed.

“Dude, this alien kind of looked like Squidard, and he could make these crystal like knife things and move things with his mind. We ended up cutting a hole in the side of the ship like in that movie and sucked him out.” He told me excitedly, I just stared in wide eyed confusion.

Permanent tag-

@kitkatkl @octobermermaid @ajosieface @instantnoodlese @crystlblu @coffeebooksandfandom @thisismysecrethappyplace e @the-wayward-robot @lokilvrr @shynara51 @fourtyninekirbygamzeegirl @loislp @savedbyimagination @bubblycypres87 @ifyousayyouloveme @courtmr @blue-cat-1989 @saharzek @lokiodinsoninwriting

Secret World tag-

@devilbat @no-regrets-just-confusion @neverseenaspaceshipbefore @silverhart93

[mooncakesnake]

2020 Vision

Wow. This year -- well, technically, we're not even halfway through it, but -- it's been wild. Super surreal in my personal life and worldwide current events.

A breakdown thus far...

Start the year off with #WWIII trending, everyone worrying that the U.S. will be going to war with Iran.

All this, while Australia is on fire. Politicians and billionaires do next to nothing, but a sex worker admirably raises funds by selling nudes.

Couple weeks into January, I get a message from my former close friend, who had cheated with my ex. A little backstory: she and I met through my then-boyfriend, because she was the girlfriend of his friend. We all worked together and were buddies. She and my ex cheated with each other, leading to the implosion of all relationships involved. For years after the respective splits, even after she and my ex broke up, she continued harassing me and her former boyfriend (my friend), spread rumours amongst our mutuals, told people I made up the abuse I went through at the hands of my ex, and created all kinds of drama. Anyway, she hits me up to apologize for everything, takes full responsibility for her actions, admitted that my ex was also abusive/controlling toward her and she was sorry for diminishing my experience. Having the validation and hearing her take accountability was actually really cathartic. Finally, I got to say my piece and let go of the anger I had harboured toward her (not for the cheating, as that initiated my escape, but for her cruel behaviour afterward). I never would've imagined we'd be on decent terms with one another, again.

In February, a couple of my fiance's family members really showed themselves for how selfish they could be and how low they could go. I won't delve too far into details, but it has forever affected the way we both view them and we will steer clear of them, as much as possible.

The biggest hit of the year happened in March... COVID-19. I'm high-risk, due to permanent lung damage I suffered from an illness in my late teens. I'm extremely susceptible to even the slightest cold turning into bronchitis and then pneumonia. So, life has changed a bit. I mean, we primarily stayed home the vast majority of the time. We both work from home and are not social people. It has affected our ability to grocery shop, though. We've been using a grocery delivery service. It's an added expense I didn't anticipate, but I can't risk exposure and Starling can't, because it would absolutely spread to me. It's been impossible to stick to eating keto, due to the meat package restrictions they have in place. I'm worried about how people are pushing to open back up. I don't know how I fit into the world anymore. I am afraid. I am afraid of the medical cost associated with catching this. I'm afraid of dying.

During the start of the pandemic, I went through a health scare. I've had a herniated disc, since October of last year. I work from home, sitting at a desk for hours on end, so it never had a chance to heal. Well, that progressed into sciatica and I'd been dealing with the nerve pain for a while. We had a trip to visit my parents, which is a 5 hour round-trip drive. From that trip, due to the prolonged sitting, my back was destroyed. I could barely walk or move in general. It was excruciating. I was making my way to the bathroom sink, when the pain overwhelmed me. I overheated, felt like I was going to vomit, the room was spinning, my eyes rolled back in my head, and my legs went out completely. I fell like a sack of bricks to the tile floor. Hard. I couldn't move my legs or open my eyes. Roman had to come help me. I was terrified that I had caused irreversible damage and might end up paralyzed. Apparently, that is a risk associated with prolonged disc and nerve damage. Unfortunately, I couldn't go to the hospital, because I couldn't risk getting the Coronavirus. We just waited it out and I went on bed-rest for a few days, taking off work and  hoping it would resolve itself. While I do still have the nerve pain and my disc is not healed, I can walk and get around pretty normally.

Since then, April has been a whirlwind of people losing their minds about being cooped up, imbeciles protesting lockdown by parading about with assault rifles to show their displeasure with the governor, family members not taking the risks seriously and acting like I'm ridiculous for wanting to protect myself.

It's May, and now we have murder hornets, so it's a lot going on.

I wonder what the second half of 2020 holds.