#I've been collecting them again throughout the year

[dragon-tamer-1]

Does anyone want to see some of my Pokémon card collection? Mainly just the ones in a binder and the few oversized cards I have.

[astrxealis]

okay rambles but i started creatively writing in like ... 5th grade? and. oh god just a little encouragement to anyone looking to get into writing or insecure or whatnot, but HELLS, maybe it's to he expected with my (obviously) very young age and inexperience with writing then, but my writing was really. yeah. Yeah. but then i'm what... a lot older now, obviously, and my writing has gotten leagues better. i'm probably not a good example for this bcs childhood years development stuff are different etc etc BUT practicing writing more and whatnot really does go a long way :]

[evermore-fashion]

Did I make a mistake?

As you're all well aware of I said goodbye to my blogs and Tumblr thinking my decision was final. However after reading all your wonderful messages I started to have doubts about my decision. So for the last few weeks I've been trying to pinpoint why I thought I had fallen out of love with high end fashion as well as Tumblr itself and the answer has been in front of my face for the best part of four years. A broken down friendship that has been plaguing my mental health… until recently and I'm going to finally explain why. I had a best friend for the best part of 15 years that went downhill both slowly and unexpectedly. We met on a forum back in 2005 and hit it off instantly. We then met up and went on various holidays, attended concerts together, did mini weekend breaks away and got to know each other's families really well. More importantly they were the only person in my life who knew about this blog and shared my love for high end fashion. Like most friendships though it had its ups and downs but no matter what we always gravitated back towards one another, until March 2020. A week or so before COVID and lockdown took hold of our lives they told me they had met someone. I was genuinely happy for them, except for the fact they had let slip that I was the last person to know. This broke my heart and their trust as they continued to let slip more details that indicated that I was being pushed out in favour of a new crowd (aka university friends who they had told me they disliked a few months beforehand) alongside their new partner. They stayed with their partner on and off throughout COVID and I was either pushed out the door or let back in depending on their relationship status. The relationship came to an end for good towards the end of 2022 and as always I was let back into their life with plans for 2023 being made. However I held back knowing the hurt it would cause me if things suddenly changed again. This was also my breaking point with them as I wanted to protect my heart from anymore hurt, and I believe this is where my love for creativity began to faulter. Whilst I found my love for gaming I felt this mental block around Evermore-Fashion and Evermore-Grimoire which I thought was down to my passions changing. I was clearly wrong. The friendship was up and down for another six months, until last summer. They had got back in contact with me despite the fact they had started acting cold towards me which manifested in a crap Christmas and Birthday. Yet I was still willing to hear their side of the story, but it never came as they ghosted me and I haven't spoken to them since which hasn't been fun to deal with both mentally and emotionally. Although I now fully believe this is what was killing my spirit and everything I had loved for so long. Anyway fast forward to January 2024, I've said goodbye to my blogs and Tumblr when lo and behold I come across a social media post that changed everything. The ex friend had written something personal that contradicted everything they had told me (over their relationship break up) which not only angered me but it lit a fire under my butt to stop stewing in the "what ifs?" as well as holding on to a small bit of hope that they'd finally apologise for treating me like a piece of shit on the back of their shoe for so long. Not only that but I started to miss why I enjoyed being online in the first place. I checked out Vogue to see what was occurring during Paris Fashion Week and I yearned to share the Spring 2024 Couture collections on Tumblr (even though I still think it's still a toxic cesspit). Yes I could easily start this up on Wordpress or Instagram but let's face it, Tumblr is still the easiest place to start blogging creatively. So here I am. The fog surrounding my love for fashion has lifted alongside the mental and emotional baggage I've been holding on to for far too long. There's just one thing I'm still wondering though… do you guys forgive me (as I feel like I've messed you all around ) and is it okay to come back? 🥹

[sungiescheotluv]

champagne supernova ⭑.ᐟ park jisung

pairing: park jisung x gender neutral reader

word count: 4.2k

tags/warnings: fluff, friends to lovers, emo(ish) jisung, non-idol au.

summary: making friends as an adult is difficult. luckily for you, the rock/alternative online community welcomes you with open arms, one person in particular catching your interest.

notes: hi thereee! 😁 back again with another jisung fic, one that i actually came up with myself lmao. since getting back into the dreamies, i've been a bit surprised by (but absolutely loving) jisung's taste in music. hence this silly fic, which i do hope you enjoy! thank you so much for all your recent support, it makes my heart smile whenever you like or comment on a post! anyways, happy reading! much loveeeee! <3

The concept of internet safety is lost on you. How else could you explain sharing a hotel room with someone you’d never met before in real life? 

Perhaps, you should retrace your steps. See how you’ve managed to find yourself in such a dangerous position, the front door locked and your body pinned to the bed.

Making friends as an adult is difficult. On par with counting every grain of rice in a field, you’d say.

You underestimated how easy maintaining friendship was when younger, third places like school, daycares, extra-curricular activities demanding your presence, inadvertently strengthening your social life. Not that you were the most social, you had a hard time approaching people actually, but maybe that was a part of your charm. Bringing you out of your shell, like all your friends did before your bond was cemented in tree trunks or sandy beaches. University is the last place you take this ease for granted, exposed to all different kinds of people and relationships, some platonic and not-so much. Either way, despite the barge of assignments and countless nights out, you’d make it into adulthood relatively unscathed.

Adulthood, however, doesn’t turn out as you expect. You’d been sold a dream, one eight-year old you envisioned dabbling with the stars accompanied by a lavish life and all the ice-cream you could get your hands on. Unfortunately, no star would be rubbing shoulders with you anytime soon and any that would, you’d have to pay a large sum of money to even see. A large sum you did not have. So, yeah. Just that, toxic work culture, endless bills and a whole host of other obligations linger above your head like a grey cloud.

What helps is finding the small joys in life. Slow mornings when the city is asleep, the scent of coffee at the crack of dawn, the sunshine against your skin, friends who despite their busy schedules carve out time to see you. All pieces of your life that make it worth living. Music is in there too, the art of melodies and lyrics strung together having the strange ability to carry you throughout even your worst days.

Your moods refuse to stick to a certain genre and in the midst of dark afternoons and frost covered roads, you find yourself gravitating towards alternative music. Slow, steady and aching. Like how your life moves with the severe lack of sun. It’s not a genre your circle of friends dabble in as much as you do. It’s to be expected, anyone who deviates from a standard of ‘normalcy’ was outcasted, one too many examples found in your high school days where kids got called weird and satanic for wearing a Green Day t-shirt to school. The thought makes you laugh now, but back then, when all that matters is fitting in, it was sad and suffocating. Seeing a part of yourself denied before your very eyes. Sometimes you’d hang out with those kids, bond over your collection of CDs and even go to a few gigs together. However, when Monday came around and they’d approach you and your friends, raving about the concert - you froze. Confronted into either owning yourself and being outcasted like the rest of the emo kids or ignoring them, deny yourself for the sake of social standing. 

You pretend like they’ve grown two heads, feigned confusion knitting your eyebrows together while your friends laugh and hurl insults at someone who you considered a friend - a better one than the ones at your side. And yet, you let the laughter continue, a coward with its tail between its legs as you depart, the taste of iron on your tongue.

Maybe this is payback for those poor decisions. A dead-end job, a successful but shitting ex and enough inner turmoil to make a therapist clutch their pearls. 

You abandon those friends when you get to university, getting better ones that wouldn’t make someone feel small due to their own insecurities. You make amends with the emo kids, your apology marking the true end of your friendship. You search online spaces for like-minded people, showing up as yourself and being embraced as. Everyone in the Reddit community is unbelievably sweet, sharing their music recommendations, concert wishlists and pictures of their cats. Some members, including yourself, form a closer bond, taking your conversation to a Discord server that becomes your escape in a way. A channel for heartfelt discussion that extends past your love for music. You’re not as active due to work obligations, but whenever you pop up, one member in particular always greets you with a warmth like no other. 

Linkin.parkjisung is his user, his icon the rock and roll hand sign over his face. Likes Blur, Green Day, Oasis and of course, Linkin Park. He’s like you, dips in and out, types a few responses before he’s gone again. It’s a scenario where other members grow closer, and your anxiety around speaking in the group begins. They’re already close, it seems almost futile to interrupt, right? 

What if you’re ignored? What if you’ve missed your window of opportunity? 

It’s a line of thinking that crosses your mind when you send in an apology for being inactive, moments later your phone pinging with a notification.

Linkin.parkjisung: no need to apologize! life gets busy for everyone, myself included. hope you’re doing ok (˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶) .ᐟ.ᐟ

Other group members echo his message, sending in their own real-life obligations that the group ends up bonding over, complaining of rising car insurance and overly demanding bosses. 

It’s the start of it all, really. That one message, a hand extended to yours that breaks you out of your shell and kick starts your friendship with Jisung. From that day onwards, you move more freely throughout the server, making good friends with everyone but better friends with Jisung. Somewhere down the line, you end up privately messaging each other. What starts out as simply giving each other music recommendations (since he apparently always loves the songs/artists you send into the server) becomes sneaking into the bathroom during a busy family reunion to call Jisung about how your grandmother wore a catsuit to impress her ex, your grandfather. You grow that close, no details spared on life events. How else is there space for secrecy when you’re video calling drunk, watching festival performances of Fontaines D.C.?

In any case, you’re close. You text everyday and call every week like clockwork, namely because you live some hours away from each other. During your calls, he’s shrouded in a low darkness, self conscious of the way he looks, he says. You’re unconvinced, slivers of his features in photos he sends you with his roommates’ three cats or on call saying otherwise. Regardless, you let it slide because Jisung becomes more than his face - he becomes a source of comfort, someone who makes you laugh as much as brings you calm, someone you slowly can’t imagine your days without. In hindsight, this is where your romantic feelings develop. And with convenient timing too because one of the bands you recommended to Jisung, Wunderhorse are on tour, set to perform in a city two hours from the both of you.

“Tickets are going onsale at 10 am on Thursday,” Jisung murmurs, the clicks of his cursor coming through your laptop speaker. “Remember to set your alarm.”

“Will do. Lemme set a remin-” opening up your calendar, you see an unwelcome surprise. “Fuck.”

“What’s up?” Jisung’s voice echoes with sincere concern.

“I forgot I have a shift that day,” you groan, already knowing by the time your lunch break came, the event would be sold out. “We’re understaffed as is, so there’s no way I can get someone to cover for me.”

A deep hum vibrates from Jisung’s chest, a few more clicks of his cursor sounding before he asks in a small voice. “Well, I could just get the tickets for us both.”

“You would?”

“Yeah, I’m meant to be working from home that day anyways. And not to flex, but my internet’s pretty decent.”

You laugh. “Is that for your job or your crippling gaming addiction?”

“A bit of both,” he chuckles back, the sound blooming a warmth of happiness in your chest. “Working in CompSci has its perks.”

“So, I’m finding out,” you smile, an underlying layer of discomfort shifting you against your desk chair. “Are you sure, though?”

“Of course. I’d hate if you lost out on this knowing I could’ve done something to help,” Jisung explains. “You were the one to introduce me to them anyways. Plus we’d have a better chance of sticking together in the pit if we get them together, right?”

You swallow a lump in your throat, something taking flight in your airy chest. “Yeah, you’re right. Just send me your bank details so I can transfer you the day of.”

“Coming right up!” he jokes, and you laugh, however lame he claims himself to be.

On Thursday, he sends you a photo of his solid black high-tech set-up, a PC he’s constructed himself with more monitors than you can count. The side of his face is included in the picture, silky black hair, a brown eye and a beauty mark on his cheekbone you dream of kissing later that night. You find out he secures the tickets on your lunch break, your debt towards him being booking the hotel you’d be staying at. Due to the limited funds you’re working with, you end up getting a shared room, an option that gives him pause before he agrees in a tremored voice. You’re a bit apprehensive yourself, but you booked for two beds, so it should be fine. If worst comes to worst, and something happens between you two – like him turning out to be a sexist neckbeard loser he couldn’t take no for an answer - you’d sleep in your car (or kick him out, actually). At any rate, you had options (and a friend tracking your live location).

In no time, weeks fly by and Wunderhorse drops their latest album. It’s the best thing you’ve experienced since sliced bread, an opinion Jisung shares as you two listen to it over call late one Friday night, speaking about your favourite songs amongst other things. You don’t know how it starts, perhaps it’s a lyric that sticks out to him that he mentions or something else entirely, but suddenly, you’re reminded of high school you. How deeply you wanted to be accepted by others, and how that satisfaction depended on the person you got it from. That you preferred conformity instead of individuality, because being seen with popular shallow kids meant something to you.

“I wasn’t a good person in high school,” you find yourself admitting, your body hollowed out with guilt. Regret like ash on your tongue. “I hurt people because I valued other people’s opinions over my own. I know I was young, but-”

“You said it yourself: you were young,” Jisung comments, the serious intent in his voice catching you off guard. “The fact you recognise your behaviour and feel remorse for it shows how much you’ve grown. I mean, high school can be very unforgiving because nobody really knows who they are or what the fuck they’re doing, so it’s only reasonably to make choices you may regret. What’s important, I think, is how you’ve chosen to move forward,”

“You said it yourself, you’ve apologised to those you hurt. Not many, if any person in your position, would do the same, which shows how much you genuinely care to make things right,” you sniff, vision blurring with tears of relief and sadness. “So, if you ask me, I think you’re being a bit hard on yourself. It’s all a learning curve, you were doing what was best to protect yourself then. And now, you’re a better and kinder person because of it.”

Another time you should’ve known you’d fallen for him. Yet, you remain none the wiser. All the way until concert day, getting off work early that Friday afternoon and making the journey down to the bright city lights of Seoul. Everything twinkles and dazzles, a 180 from your modest living in your hometown. You suppose your excitement for the concert has some role in this too, but considering the lack of vibrancy in your life, you allow yourself to sink your teeth into this. Feel the goosebumps against your skin, the lightness in your limbs and the uptake in your heartbeat.

You check into the hotel first since Jisung has a last-minute team meeting at work, setting yourself up on your side of the cosy room of wooden and white hues. As you slip on your Hello Kitty headband to do skincare, a knock rasps against the door, audible above the sound of your music.

With furrowed eyebrows, you approach the door, revealing a sight that stops your heart in its tracks.

On the other side of the door is who you should’ve expected: Jisung. What you don’t expect, however, is his sharp features, black smooth hair with matching formal clothing to contrast so beautifully with his porcelain skin. The dark, ocean blue contacts he wears with a pretty pink lip tint. Not to mention that beauty mark you’ve been thirsting over for the past few months? Yeah, that’s all in eye-view now, close enough to touch and it’s this fact that sends your brain into overdrive.

While you malfunction, Jisung dips his head, a large fist curled to his lips to hide his sheepish smile. Chuckles in a bit of an awkward and embarrassed way. 

Oh my god?!

“Nice to finally meet you,” he greets, black leather overnight bag clutched to his side. A fluffy blue and pink keychain of Little Twin Stars hangs off the zip, a cute juxtaposition to his intimidating outfit. And height. God, he really wasn’t lying when he said he was nearly 6 ft. 

“I texted you I’d arrived, but you hadn’t read them,”

A forceful blink out of your trance brings you back to reality, one where you’re not openly drooling over how handsome your internet best friend is. “Yeah, sorry. I was busy getting ready.”

“I figured so,” his eyes scan your clothes - your ripped baggy jeans, leather platform shoes amongst what you have on - and his lips curve, admiration in his eyes. “You look great.”

If there weren’t societal ideals of an inappropriate reaction to that compliment, you would’ve tattooed it to your forehead, or on your lower back. Maybe ripped off your shirt and kissed him before combusting because what do you mean, this very handsome man, thinks you look great?!

“Thank you,” you blush, your body running hot like a furnace. Even so, you decide to take advantage of the situation, leaning in for an embrace that he reciprocates as you mumble into his shoulder. “Nice to finally meet you too.”

The rest of the afternoon blurs, the few moments of scattered glances and awkward silence incomparable with the ease of conversation that flows between you once his favourite song, Poppy, comes on. Catching up to speed with each other’s day as you two get ready, it’s not lost on you how domestic the scene is - how familiar, or right it feels. Jisung, in all aspects of the word, is endearing - flustered by the compliments you send his way, brightening up at the new additions to the setlist and best of you, timid with pink cheeks when he hands over a ‘first meeting’ gift - an assortment of snacks, a Hello Kitty plushie and a card that makes you coo. It takes everything in you not to sink your teeth into him, overwhelmed by the sweetness that laces his actions and words, riding the high he and the music gives you as you make your way to the venue after you’re both finished.

Long lines snake around the arena, grey clouds permeating the area as rainfall clatters to the pavement. Jisung, ever so prepared, brings along an umbrella that you share, squeezing underneath so much you feel the warmth of Jisung through his bare, very defined bicep. How someone looks so good in a silver sequin top under a tattered sleeveless black vest is beyond you. Then again, him being single is beyond your comprehension too. Considering his calm and thoughtful demeanour, coupled with his good looks, you would’ve expected people lining up by the thousands to plead their case. However, whenever you two talked about this, he’d simply say his go-to phrase and change the topic, his phrase being:

“I’ve got my eye on someone. Just working up the courage to ask them out.”

Whoever managed to catch his eye, you’d thought to be lucky. Maybe they’d saved a small village in their past life because as people push when the doors open, Jisung shields you from any damage, reminding you how good of a romantic partner he could be. Especially so when you’re inside and he snaps all your photos, accompanying you to the bar and merch table where you get matching t-shirts before he keeps them with him so you’re free throughout the concert. Dimmed red lights and chatter fill the spacious hall, a flood of warm bodies surrounding you as you peer at the stage, the band all set up and ready to go come showtime. You sing along to the host of songs the venue plays beforehand, enough nudges in the shoulder to get Jisung to sing along and of course - of course - he has a beautiful voice too. At this point, you were convinced he either had a missing toe or had weird opinions about the order of cereal because the more you spent time with him, the more he shines in your eyes.

Eventually, the chatter dies down and all lights go off, screams rising through the crowd as Wunderhorse comes onto the stage. Buzzing at a frequency unheard of, you bounce off the balls of your feet, hand holding Jisung as you exclaim, “It’s them! It’s really them!”

Missing how flushed Jisung becomes at the contact, you sing with all your heart - offkey and all - to their opening song, Midas. The energy is through the roof, a dizzying world of flashing lights and music that retches the lyrics straight out of you. In a moment’s chance, Jisung and you turn to each other mid-song, smiles bright as the stage lights outline your damp faces, chest heaving with a mouthful of lyrics in their wake. It’s the happiest you’ve been, holding his hand like this, and as the night winds to simmer, you sway to slow songs and thank your lucky stars for finding your way back to this.

After the show, you two chatter with other adoring fans before trekking to your nearby hotel, stomachs growling for food. Jisung finds a great Chinese place that delivers until 2 am, a gesture you simper at, unaware he’d even remembered you’d liked the cuisine. At this point, you’re drained in the best possible way, a dull ache in your feet but riding a high of something you’ll remember forever. 

Now, you’re all up to speed. Great. Let’s get back to your current dilemma.

Somehow, someway, your unlaced and stubborn platform shoes cause a stumble, one that Jisung tries to save you from but ends up caught in the mix. How, you might ask? Well, you’re not entirely sure but what you definitely know is that you’ve fallen on one of the beds, Jisung’s body caging yours as he braces his own fall. Face-to-face. With you.

Ok.

You’re close enough to share a breath, within reach to see his long lashes and shaky pupils that dart from your eyes to your lips, back to your eyes again. Suddenly, the room temperature dials to an unprecedented heat, walls closing in on you two as you lie in waiting. Waiting for the other to make their move. To lean in or pull away, heads or tails on a coin.

His phone rings, cutting through the tension-filled air with a knife. The moment, gone. 

“You okay?” he rasps, a knit in his eyebrows as if he’s holding himself back. You blink wordlessly, your answer in an absent nod. “I’ll, uhm…get the food.”

It’s not a suggestion, nothing that you can object to, particularly when he’s long gone and you’re clutching at your chest, months of infatuation knocking the breath out of you.

When Jisung returns minutes later, you’ve turned the TV on, preparing to fill the silence if need be. It proves necessary, only groans of pleasure and compliments to the chef shared between you two as you eat your weight in noodles. Not much is said when you’re getting ready for bed either, brushing your teeth together as if you're a couple and settling into separate beds, all the lights turned off.

Still reeling for the fall, and convinced his shallow breaths allude to his slumber, you’re startled by the call of your name, head turning towards Jisung beside you.

“Yes?”

“You sure you’re ok?” he asks before clearing his throat. “That was…some fall.”

You can say that again.

“I’m ok,” you lie. You’re on high alert, frazzled at every end with a heart you’ve just realised longs for the man not even two metres away from you. “Are you?”

Silence. The only feedback you hear is the crinkle of his duvet as he shuffles in his bed.

“Ask me another question.”

You turn to him, shrouded in darkness. “Like what?”

He doesn’t speak again, lets the silence devour the space between you before he says. “Ask me about the person I’m interested in.”

Water that rivals the arctic pours down your back, a harsh call to reality as you remember. Right, he has someone he’s interested in. Someone who he’ll devout his time to, listen to their music recommendations and hold their hands at concerts. And you? Well, you’ll still be friends, just not as close. Maybe not even friends at all.

The thought closes an iron fist around your heart.

“Why haven’t you asked them out?” is what you manage, because it’s on your mind - what time and place he’ll find himself in when he confesses his feelings.

“Because I’m scared,” he admits, small and in a whisper. “Considering we met online, it’s kind of hard to gauge their interest or read any signs. You don’t give me much to work with,”

You still. “I don’t?’

“I mean, I haven’t been too obvious, but I’m crazy about you,” he confesses. “I love the light in your eyes and the kindness in your heart. You’re so deeply human and live life like it’s your first and last. There’s no one like you and I think the idea of knowing how special you are triggered my fear of rejection. Because what would my life be without watching festival performances drunk with you? What would it be if you didn’t laugh at my lame jokes and didn’t command my every thought?”

Jisung shuffles again, a flicker of dim light in between you two at a lamp source as he stares over at you, wholehearted and vulnerable. “It’d be an empty one - not worth living.”

Slowly, your body brings you upwards, the two of you hanging off the edges of your bed. So close if you’d reach out, your hands would touch. 

“When?” you croak, unable to meet his eyes. “When did you…start feeling this way?”

His eyes lower, a slight curve to the corner of his lips. “Around November?”

Electricity zaps your back straight. Five months ago? “When we joined the server?”

“Shortly after that,” he admits, a coy grin breaking out against his flushed features. “I was having a really hard day and you’d recommend a song in the chat, Favourite by Fontaines DC, and said how nostalgic and hopeful it felt to you. I gave it a listen and…it was like a battery in my back. I cried, but I also smiled too because I understood what you meant by it all,”

He threads his fingers together, peering up with shining eyes as he adds, “it felt like a peak into your soul, and mine too….I think that’s where it started.”

Your hand finally reaches out, overlaying his as tears fill your sight. “You know you’re my favourite, right?”

“No one stood a chance after that drunk video of you singing along to Champagne Supernova,” you share a laugh, reminiscing of the video he accidentally sent into the server one December night. A die-hard Oasis fan till the end. “I mean it. There’s no one I’d want to spend my days with, listen to music with and discover all there is to life. No one but you.”

His bottom lip gives a wobble, hands unearthing from yours as his thumb grazes your knuckles, bringing the hand up in a searing kiss. One he looks you right in the eyes for as he says, “Can we push the beds together please?”

You bark out an unexpected laugh, fondness shaping your smile as you speak with all of your heart. “I would love nothing more.”

[galacticlarry]

🌟2024 FIC RECS🌟

Here's a list of fics I read in loved in 2024. I read 208 fics this year, and, although I really struggle with choosing favourites, these are a few of them. I tried to limit it to one fic (or series) per author to avoid this list being the same people over and over.

🌟 Nest To You by Neondiamond / @neondiamond (T, 14.9k)

Everybody knows it’s in an Omega’s nature to nest, and Harry is no different. From the very first nest he builds to comfort himself when feeling homesick to the nest he one day brings his new pups home to, his Alpha Louis is there to witness it all.

Or: Ten different nests Harry builds throughout his relationship with Louis.

This one was adorable. Truly one of the cutest fics I've read.

🌟 Heels Over Head by kingsofeverything / @kingsofeverything (E, 3.4k)

Louis Tomlinson returns from tour to find that his new next door neighbor doesn't realize his backyard is not completely private.

This one was so funny and I kept giggling the entire time I was reading it.

🌟 Just Another Card Again by tippitytap / @tippitytap (G, 3.7k)

Dear reader,

this is a story of Harry and Louis falling in love through greeting cards and being neighbours.

With love,

Clifford

This one is so so so cute! I love the concept, and the links to all of the cards they used is such a perfect detail. I am absolutely obsessed!

🌟 When the idea of someone is often wrong, write fanfiction to fix-it by INnenaHeart / @thechavier (M, 2.2k)

"Haz? Are you… are you writing porn?"

Harry typed for a while longer, and when he put the last comma, he raised his head and looked Louis in the eyes, as serious as Louis had ever seen him.

"No Lou, I'm writing August Moon fanfiction."

"Which is basically porn."

"No, it's f-a-n-f-i-c-t-i-on."

"You say fanfiction babe, and all I hear is p-o-r-n."

Harry sighed.

"Yeah, ok, it's porn. It got plot though… and feelings!"

or Harry can't do much about movies being made about him or the idea people have of him, so he writes fanfictions in his spare time.

This one is really funny and surprisingly sweet.

🌟 Larry Holiday Series by Specksofgold (E, 13.8k)

A collection of five fics, all taking place during different holidays.

This was such a cool concept and I admire the dedication to the theme. I also loved getting to see their relationship evolve as time passed.

🌟 Hiding Green Smiles by HoldingOnToChaos / @holdingontochaos (E, 45k)

Louis’ heart is racing in his chest. The idea of temporary bonding—letting Harry bite down right on that spot without it being a real bond—makes his mouth go dry. He didn’t even know something like this existed! His mind fills with all the possibilities and questions. What’s it going to feel like? How will it affect his orgasms? How will it affect Harry’s knot? What parts of a bond does it simulate?

When Louis goes with Liam to a hidden sex shop, he discovers a new sex toy, the BiteMat, and he can't believe his luck. He loves being bitten, has a biting kink, even, and now he can be bitten over his bonding spot without the fear of anything permanent.

He hastily buys it to try with Harry, his friend and roommate, and his regular heat/rut partner for the last eighteen months. They've been friends-with-benefits outside heat or rut for eight months now, and Louis' been desperately in love with Harry for at least five of those months.

--

Or the BiteMat fic

Everything Lora has posted this year has been absolutely phenomenal and choosing one was REALLY difficult, but I ended up going with this one, because it was the first one I read and I'm kind of attached to it. I love how cute and caring they are, but MY GOD are they stupid! I could genuinely talk about this fic for hours (I'm sure I have) but I have to keep this somewhat short. And, again, the urge to include all of Lora's fics in this list is strong, but I shall resist it (go read them anyway).

🌟 I’ll tell you something (I hope you’ll understand) by yeah_alright / @uhoh-but-yeah-alright (E, 2.7k)

Louis insists that Harry stay off her phone and in the safety of Louis' room rather than risk moping in her own, texting her ex-boyfriend. When Harry agrees on one condition, Louis' safe night in could become something else entirely.

This one is so good, and cute, and sweet, and I just love it! I'm a sucker for a bit of yearning.

🌟 the "Falling" series by we_are_the_same / @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed (T, 4k)

A collection of two fics taking place after Harry and Louis break up.

These are painful and beautiful and everything in between and I love them a lot.

🌟 The Coach Tommo Universe by enchantedlandcoffee / @enchantedlandcoffee (E, 9k)

A collection of seven fics where Harry is a single parent to his twin girls Megsie and Becky, and Louis is the little league coach of the team Becky plays for.

These are so so sweet. I love their dynamic and their cute little family.

🌟 Colorful Hearts by Larrysmomfics / @larrysmomfics (M, 20k)

In a world where orgasmic emissions change color depending on the person’s mood, Louis Tomlinson’s semen has only ever been blue. At the recommendation of his doctor he attends a support group for people with similar conditions. The leader of Colorful Hearts, a therapist named Harry, is positively swoonworthy and sets Louis at ease right away. Needless to say that Louis isn’t aware yet that so much more than the color of his spunk is about to change.

OR

The Rainbow jizz fic, a mood ring orgasms AU

This one is so incredibly silly (which I'm sure anyone could guess from the summary alone), but it's also so soft and sweet and I just love it a lot!

🌟 put a little love on me by CuckooTrooke / @larrydoinglaundry (E, 29k)

Two people who are always taking care of someone else’s needs while ignoring their own, just happen to cross paths.

Such a sweet fic!

🌟 Not the Desperate Type by lululawrence / @lululawrence (NR, 6.3k)

“First of all, I’d like to tell you how disturbing it is that you’re this familiar with your neighbor’s sex life,” Liam said, amusement lacing his tone.

“Fuck off,” Louis said, laughing.

“Second, that is really very sad. How bad is the stomping? Are you sure your neighbor doesn’t like it fast like that?”

“With the amount of cleaning the guy does, I think he’s taking out his sexual frustration on the cleanliness of his apartment. I can’t imagine the guy makes enough mess to require daily vacuuming.”

It sounded like the guy was actually moving furniture above him as he was sweeping now. Damn. Did Louis miss the seven minutes in heaven or was the guy angry because he didn’t even get that much pleasure today?

“I’m kinda afraid with the amount of noise he produces while cleaning that one day I’m gonna look up through my ceiling and be able to see him.”

“Tell him we wish him a better sex life and that we’re rooting for him if you do.”

Or the one where Louis' neighbor has a series of unfortunately short sexual experiences and Louis can hear every. Single. One.

This one was so silly and funny. I loved it!

🌟 Eyes so blue, Shorts so red by nonsensedarling / @absoloutenonsense (G, 2.6k)

Harry isn't like any roommate Louis has had before. For one, he doesn't know what a poem is (or skee-ball, for that matter), but luckily for him, Louis doesn't mind answering any and all of his questions.

*

Or Alien Harry discovers poetry.

Such a lovely fic! They're just so so so cute!

🌟 speak now or forever hold your peace by wildestdreams / @thelavendrhaze (E, 23k)

“So, Louis is getting married.”

Zayn just blinked at him and gave a single nod in response to Harry’s sudden topic change.

“That’s all?” Harry asked. “That’s all you’ve got to say about it? Louis is getting married and all you do is nod your head?”

“What do you want me to say?” Zayn burst out laughing. “I didn’t realize that Louis was someone we still talked about.”

“He’s not,” Harry said firmly. “But right now --.” Harry let out a shaky breath and ran a hand through his hair. “Louis is getting married, okay? And he sent everyone an invitation -- he let everyone know -- but me.”

or the one where Harry crashes Louis’ wedding. (A Love, Rosie AU)

This one was frustrating but also very cute and funny. I really enjoyed it!

🌟 The Moon Cradles All by galastyles / @disneydimples (G, 7.1k)

When Louis was a child, his mother told him about Christmas Fairies, magical beings that would assist the Christmas efforts in the North Pole by watching every child and helping to make the final decision to whether they would be on the Nice or Naughty list. When he had a daughter of his own, he told her the same tale. At least, he always thought it was a tale.

This one is so cute and wholesome and I'm absolutely obsessed with it!

🌟 A Frail Farewell by Rearviewdreamer / @all-these-larrythings (M, 44k)

Louis can’t believe his luck when he is offered one of the easiest jobs he has had as a long-term house-sitter for the wealthy. He loves the money, and the peace and quiet of the empty mansions he looks after. Most of all he likes that there are no surprises until he gets the shock of his life from ex-pop star Harry Styles who isn’t supposed to be home.

I read this as a wip and I was always looking forward to those updates. They're just so sweet and gentle with each other and I loved every second of reading this!

🌟 When the Lights Go Out by thelarenttrap / @antidotetogo (E, 79k)

“Louis, what do you have to say about how last week ended?” the reporter asks.

There’s a moment of silence. Harry is looking at the reporter, but eventually gives in and looks down the table at Louis.

He’s looking straight ahead, as if Harry isn’t even in the room.

“If you can’t take the heat, then get out of the kitchen.”

Harry leans forwards, placing his arms on the table and leaning onto them to get as close to his microphone as he can while looking at Louis.

“And what’s that supposed to mean?”

Louis turns to him, his icy blue eyes meeting Harry's. “Driving is your fuckin’ job, act like it.”

In its near eighty years of existence, Formula 1 has never had an out gay driver. In 2017, Harry Styles signs a contract with Scuderia AlphaTauri alongside his childhood friend and competitor, Louis Tomlinson. The next decade of their careers is some of the most tumultuous press--on and off the track--Formula 1 has ever seen.

aka the one where Louis and Harry are childhood friends to enemies to lovers over the course of 15 ish years.

This one was so captivating from beginning to end, I genuinely couldn't put it down. It also managed to make me have any kind of interest in sports, so that has to count for something, right?

🌟 Cabin on the Bluff by juliusschmidt / @juliusschmidt (E, 6.7k)

A collection of three fics depicting different moments in Harry and Louis' summer romance.

These are so so so good! There's just something about getting tiny glimpses of this universe that makes it so intriguing and I want to know more.

🌟 All You Want's Under Your Nose by Wishingforloushair / @wishingforloushair (E, 3.5k)

Louis decides to treat himself to a new sex toy, but is perplexed when he sees a man in the shop placing each vibrator against the tip of his nose and sneezing. Curiosity gets the better of him, and it turns out the man, Harry, is a sex-god who knows far too much about sex toys and promises Louis that if a vibrator makes him sneeze it will definitely make him come. Of course there's only one way to find out for sure…

“Oh,” the man furrowed his brow. “It’s to test whether or not the vibrations will get me off.”

Louis stared at him. “That’s not a thing, is it?”

“Oh, yeah,” the man nodded, emphatically. “The nerves responsible for making you sneeze are the same ones responsible for making you orgasm. So when you’re buying sex toys it's always a good idea to test it to see if it will make you sneeze. Or your girlfriend. Whoever you’re using the toy on.”

“I don’t have a girlfriend,” Louis found himself saying.

The man’s eyebrows raised for a split second. “Me either. I’m Harry,” he said, holding his hand out for Louis to take.

“Louis,” he said, taking it firmly. “I don’t think that’s real though.”

This one is really funny and the smut is great too. Loved it!

🌟 Someone You Couldn’t Lose by InsightfulInsomniac / @insightfulinsomniac (E, 19.2k)

For the past three years of university, Harry worked hard to push his romantic feelings for his best friend aside. Now that they’re in their final year of uni, his omega has other plans that slip through the hairpin cracks in his restraint.

Thankfully, Louis readily indulges his incessant and rather out of control nesting behavior. While their closeness doesn’t help Harry with his unrequited feelings, he at least knows that he’s not revealing his deepest secret to the alpha unintentionally. Louis’ genetic lack of a sense of smell allows Harry’s feelings to fly under the radar.

For now.

A uni AU where nesting behavior and a little body oil sparks a much-too-affectionate friends with benefits relationship that has some very unexpected outcomes.

This one was truly adorable.

🌟 everything of mine is yours by blueskiesrry / @blueskiesrry (E, 33k)

"Did you two have a good time?”

Harry in his bathroom, brushing his teeth with frizzy hair and tired eyes. Harry on the couch cuddled up with Posy, cradling her in the crook of his elbow, humming a soft song. Harry laughing with his friends in a pub on a Friday night, a flower field in his eyes. Harry in his bed tucked under the covers, naked against fresh sheets like a shock of moonlight cutting through a storm.

“Yeah,” he says. “We did.”

or: With Harry in New York finishing up his PhD and Louis in London working as a solicitor, they try to navigate their eight year situationship including almost-daily phone calls, the occasional indulgence of casual phone sex, and endless gossip sessions as the feelings they have for each other get harder to ignore.

This one was heartbreaking and painful and so so so beautiful! I loved every second of it and never wanted it to end.

🌟 Scarred by allwaswell16 / @allwaswell16 (E, 23k)

As a male omega, Louis has learned to live with disappointment and rejection, but he dreams of the day he finds his soulmate. When Harry inadvertently rejects him as his soulmate, Harry has no idea he's doomed Louis to a slow, painful death.

Pride doesn't keep Louis from telling Harry the truth. But love does.

This one broke my heart and then put it back together. The angst, their relationship, the friendship between all of them, just all of it really. Truly an amazing read!

🌟 we could be enough by HelloLovers13 / @hellolovers13 (M, 5k)

“You know I am flirting with you, right?”

Louis freezes mid-bite. Just manages not to choke on his steak.

Harry laughs a bit too loudly, almost like he’s nervous. “Yeah, should’ve known you weren’t the observant kind. You think I get this dressed up for a random dinner with a mate on a Tuesday night?”

or

Louis never imagined anyone could love him for who he truly is.

Then he meets Harry.

I can't get over how sweet this one is. I love that Harry is so supportive and so willing to make Louis feel comfortable and accepted. Truly, a beautiful story.

🌟 It's Not That I Don't Want You by parmahamlarrie / @parmahamlarrie (E, 12.5k)

It begins with a benign comment during a night in watching a show with his lovely boyfriend, Louis, and leads Harry to a months long journey to understand himself better. Will Harry figure out what makes him feel so different from everyone else? And will he find the courage to tell his boyfriend?

Or a character study into Ace Harry with the most supportive boyfriend, Louis.

This one was so emotional and sweet. I loved Louis' willingness to understand Harry and support him the best he can.

🌟 So perfect for me by reallynotmemoi / @reallynotmemoi (NR, 580)

Louis surprises Harry by giving him flowers.

This one was short and sweet. I loved it!

🌟 Just a taste of your lips by grapejuice_babe (E, 13.3k)

"I'm a firm believer in love at first sight, babe. You didn't have to walk by five times."

"Oh, hush."

"I'm going to politely request for you to make me."

-

Or, the five times Louis knew Harry was his soulmate and the one time it was confirmed.

Such a wonderfully written, sweet and funny fic. I couldn't stop smiling. Rest in peace, Addy.

🌟 Always Come Back To You by whoknows / @crazyupsetter (E, 28k)

“I’ll do it,” Harry offers brightly. No one even blinks. “I’ll do it?”

Louis sighs irritably. “Shut up,” he orders, tossing a pillow in the general direction of Harry’s face. This is a terrible time for jokes, especially Harry’s lame, old people ones.

Not that it was an old people joke. Just that most of the time Harry’s jokes consist of knock-knocks or terrible puns. The type of jokes old people like, Louis’ pretty sure. His nan always finds them hilarious when Harry tells her one.

Harry bats the pillow out of the air without even blinking. “Be reasonable, Lou,” he says in his most reasonable voice.

Louis is perfectly reasonable, thank you very much, and he’s also frustrated and upset and tired and he really wants to punch something. Maybe he should have held on to that pillow a little longer.

“You’re not gonna fucking do it,” he snaps. “That’s the last thing I need.”

This one was very cute and at times quite silly. They're both complete and total idiots, but I love them, even though I want to yell at them just a little bit.

🌟 When I Think About You by phdmama / @phdmama (E, 4.6k)

Harry is beautiful, inexperienced, and curious. Louis is smart, seasoned, and comfortable in her own body. When Harry has questions, just maybe, Louis has the answers she’s looking for.

And… they’re roommates.

This one is so soft and sweet, and the little "twist" towards the end is everything to me.

🌟 Blue Nights by SilverStuff50 / @silverstuff50 (E, 55k)

Louis does what he needs to do to make ends meet, and if that means showing his body to make money, so be it, he'll use the gifts he's been given to keep him and his dad safe.

When a mysterious benefactor starts to make demands on him, Louis has to question whether its the money or the man he's most tempted by.

This one was so so so good! I'm truly obsessed with how perfect they are for each other and how much they care about each other. Such a well written fic!

🌟 Suddenly They're Right by sapphichug (E, 22k)

Helene smiled, the wrinkles by her eyes and mouth flattering her face. “That sounds lovely. And you didn’t even fool around? Isn’t that the whole point of spending the night with a friend with benefits?”

“We’re not that, we’re just…we’re just friends.”

“Who sleep together. Literally and figuratively.”

“Yes.”

“How is that not being friends with benefits?”

Louis huffed. “Keep your voice down, please. I do have a class going on, if you didn’t notice. And I don’t know, but that sounds so…immature and sleazy, and that’s not what we have.”

Helene leaned closer and aggressively whispered at him, “Because you also have romance and meaningful feelings for each other and everything a real relationship has, sans the label.”

✶ ✶

Louis is a painting professor with an art block the size of Texas and a global superstar for a non-boyfriend, who he wants to keep.

a fic about feeling stuck and learning to free oneself

This one was so moving and so emotional. I wish I could come up with something that would be good enough to describe it, but I'm not very good with these things. I'll just say that I almost cried reading the comments on this fic, because all of them were so beautiful and I'm so glad that this beautiful story received so many beautiful comments.

🌟 'tis the damn season by YesIsAWorld / @louandhazaf (E, 17.9k)

Harry returns to her small hometown over the holiday season and starts to think about the road not taken.

This was painful but so incredibly sweet, my face started to hurt form how much I was smiling.

and a bit of sameless self-promo for good measure

🌟 Enough To Wish For More by galactic_larry (M, 33k)

Louis Tomlinson just wants a few days of peace and quiet while his family are out of state. But when he meets the lead singer of a band he’s never heard of, his life and everything he thought he knew about it changes forever.

Harry Styles just wants to get his new guitar and then he’s leaving Haverhill, Massachusetts as fast as he can. But when he gets lost and asks someone for directions, he finds a lot more than the street he was initially looking for.

A long, complicated, painful, fucked up story about love.

Choosing one of my babies was difficult, but it had to be done since I did it for everyone else. This is genuinely the best thing I have ever written, probably the best thing I'll ever write too, and I'm immensely proud of it.

[hihomeghere]

Hello my new favorite creator! I just saw your response to my last request (the soft y/n dom one) and I'm deffo going to formally request you turn it into a story (if you're not doing that already) I've been reading more of your content and it's quickly becoming an addiction 😅 any way I'll be a big supporter from the shadows <333 -🧛 anon (Naming myself lol)

Routine | Five Hargreeves / F!Reader

Part of the Tesoro series (Can be read as a one shot)

Word Count : 2.3k Summary : After the confession, Five and reader head back to a hotel room. Soft dom y/n. Aged up!Five Warnings/Tags : Smut, handjob, masturbation, piv, cursing, fluff at the end, this is filth enjoy <3 ( I do not own the umbrella academy or any of it's characters )

If Five was anything, he was a creature of habit. His father had ingrained that in him from a young age. Chores, training, studies, hell even his meal times were scheduled. His entire life was based on routine. 

Then he was stuck in the apocalypse, and even though there were millions of things Five could be mad at his father about, he had to appreciate his sense for routine. It kept him alive, he still had a set time to eat (if he had anything to eat), but instead of training he was scavenging. Picking through a wasteland for anything edible, along with trying to find a sustainable source of clean water. While picking through for food, he would also collect anything to help conserve his energy. Things like his bike or wagon, etc. His definition of ‘resting’ was mainly anytime he could sit down. During those periods he would work on equations, trying to find a way out of there and back to his family. And although it wasn’t strictly in his routine, mental breakdowns always seemed to weasel their way into his day. 

Thankfully, both of those routines were a thing of the past. Now his routine consisted of reading up on case files before going into the field. He’d kill whoever he had to and afterwards he’d reward himself with fucking his fist until he fell asleep. Did it make him feel a bit disgusted with himself, yes, but masturbation had been the only stress relief he’d ever had. Again, just another one of his constants throughout the years. What he hadn’t accounted for was you. At first he had marked you off as a nuisance. Like the cockroaches that somehow managed to survive alongside Five, although you were much nicer to look at. 

Five knew he was in trouble when he started subconsciously adding your routines into his. You would start getting hungry around 11:30 every day, like clockwork. So he had started planning his lunches for around 11:30, not because the thought of you eating alone made his heart seize in his chest, just to make his work more efficient. It aggravated him to have to wait for you to be finished with your lunch, only for him to get hungry once you returned. So out of convenience, he started eating lunch with you. Little things like that.

He couldn’t exactly say he was surprised. You were always one to throw wrenches in the works. Although he didn’t account for a deviation of this size into his plan. When he kissed you, a silent confession on his feelings, he knew there would be no going back. You were it for him. He loved you and you seemed to share those feelings. Your lips crashed against his as he fumbled with the key to the hotel room. You giggled into the kiss, something so sickly sweet. His hands were back on you as soon as the door swung open. Pulling the key out of the lock and throwing it onto a side table as he kicked the door close behind you. His hands were everywhere, touching and squeezing. Your breasts, oh god, your tits. He couldn’t get enough of them, his hand flew under your blouse, pinching your nipple through your  bra. You gasped softly, your hands threading through his hair. He stopped, admiring your flushed face as he kicked off his shoes. Your lips parted slightly, hot breath fanning across his face, a light splattering of blood across your cheek. 

You pulled away, and he almost whined at the loss of contact. What was happening to him? Did you really have such a hold on him? He was taken back to his younger years, when his father would read from Homer’s Odyssey. He had never paid much attention to the sirens, that was more of Diegos and Luthers interest. He wished he had listened to Circe’s warnings like Odysseus, now he was sure he had met a siren in person. He was bewitched by you, drawn to you like iron to a magnet. Five was sure you were more beautiful than Helen of Troy, hell even Aphrodite would be jealous of your beauty. 

“I’m going to take a shower.” You smiled, pushing him back onto the bed before kissing his cheek. Another one of your routines, always showering after a mission. You made a show of undressing yourself, slowly unbuttoning your blouse. Then shimmying out of your trousers. You hooked your fingers under your bra strap, pulling them down at an agonizing pace. You unhooked your bra, throwing it onto the chair. Five’s eyes never left your body until you were behind the bathroom door. He gulped, his cock painfully pressed against the crotch of his slacks. He hurried to pull himself free, the buckle of his belt clinking metal against metal. He started to get frantic in his movements, unzipping his pants and kicking them off along with his underwear. His cock sprung up against his stomach. He let out a sigh, spitting into his hand. He grabbed himself, lubricating his dick with his spit. At times like this he wondered if was seriously fucked in the head. But normally once he ran his thumb over the slit on his head any negative thoughts would be tucked away. He arched his neck, letting out a shaky breath as he started to stroke himself. His mind wandering to you, always you. “Fuck,” he sighed squeezing the base of his cock. Your flushed face, a blush painting your cheeks. That slutty fucking skirt you wore, tight around your hips, he didn’t know how you got that little thing over your ass. He groaned, his eyes rolling back as he picked up the pace. How your lips felt against his throat as you ordered him to cum, your tits bouncing with each of his thrusts. His hips jolted up into his hand, he craved more, his other hand gently cupped his balls. He was close, his breath getting caught in his throat. “Y/n.” He whined, his eyes fluttering close.

“Starting without me?” You asked leaning on the doorway to the bathroom. Clad in only a towel, tightly wrapped around your body. He froze, caught red handed with his pants down. Fuck he was so close. He tugged on himself, chasing after his high as it slowly slipped away. You stopped him, swatting his hand away from his dick. “Excuse me?” You scoffed, your arms crossed above him. You stared down at him, his chest rising and falling rapidly. 

“What?” He asked, his eyebrows knitting together. You grabbed his face, your fingers pressing his lips together, his skin dimpling under your grip. His breath hitched, his eyes going wide. “Y/n, what are you doing?” He said through squished lips.

“You started without me.” You repeated, a wolfish grin spreading across your face. He scoffed, rolling his eyes. You turned his face so he was looking at you, his green eyes wide. He let out a surprised sound, “Now, would you like to finish?” You asked with a commanding voice. His eyes flicked all over your face. 

“Y-yes.” He stuttered, his adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed. You let go of his face, walking backwards until the back of your knees hit the plush chair. You sank down onto the chair, slowly undoing your towel, letting it pool around your body. 

He stared at you, his eyebrows still furrowed. You chuckled to yourself, his expression taking you back to the first night you spent together. So unsure of himself, his hands twitched against the sheets. His dick stood at attention, brushing against his white shirt. His angry red tip made a wet spot on his shirt. 

“Take off your shirt first,” you said, leaning back in the chair, spreading your legs. It was like he had been frozen until your command. His eager fingers moved to his shirt, unbuttoning the buttons quickly. He tore it off of him, throwing it onto the floor. He turned to you for his next instructions, a newfound glint in his eye. “You can touch yourself.” You cooed, immediately his hand wrapped around his cock. Stroking himself with fever, he wet his bottom lip, his hips jolting against his fist. Five was so pretty like this, not that he wasn’t a gorgeous man, but he was so vulnerable. Pride bloomed in your chest knowing that you were the only one allowed to see Five like this. His head fell back, giving you a gorgeous view of his neck. He let out a strangled whine, his lips parting. You sat up, unable to help yourself. You stalked towards him, your hands holding his shoulders. Your lips attacked his neck, nipping and sucking on his neck. Dark spots adorning his pale skin.

“Fuck,” he moaned, leaning into your touch. You reached down, pulling his hand away. He let out a frustrated whine, biting his lip as he stared into your eyes. You smiled sweetly, kissing his cheek over his two freckles, before squeezing his shaft. You began to pump him harshly, sucking a deep mark on his collarbone. His hands flew to your hips, holding them with a vice like grip. “I’m gonna cum.” He said through his gritted teeth, “please let me cum.” He squeezed your hips, his fingers digging into your soft skin.

“You can cum baby,” You chuckled, licking a stripe up his neck. He cried out his hips jolting against your hand as ropes of cum shot out onto your fist. You grinned, working him through his orgasm. A pained expression painting his features. As he came down from his high, he softly rubbed circles onto your hips. 

“That was…” He trailed off clearing his throat, his hands drifting upwards on his body. You giggled, wrapping your arms around his shoulders, pulling him flush against your body.

“Never would have guessed Mr. Five Hargreeves would be so obedient.” You laughed, kissing him. He pulled away from the kiss.

“Are you trying to get a rise out of me y/n?” He said, cocking his head slightly. A smug smile spread across his face, his eyes darkened. You felt like the prey instead of the predator under his gaze.

“I would never dream of it.” You smirked, feeling him get hard against your stomach. “Already?” You chuckled, rolling your eyes. 

“I can’t help that I have the most gorgeous girl in front of me, naked.” He mused, raising his eyebrows. You pushed him back, his back hitting the mattress with a soft thud. He smirked, propping himself up on his elbows. You crawled on top of him, setting yourself over his waist. He leaned his head forward, his lips covering your right breast. You lowered yourself onto him, moaning as he pushed through your opening. He let out a pained cry against your breast. 

“Are you alright?” You asked, stalling your movement.

“Mmm,” he hummed, his eyes shut tight, his hands gripping your hips, stilling any movements you would make. “Just sensitive, tesoro.” He chuckled looking up at you through his heavy eyelashes. You grinned, you wanted nothing more than to have Five under you a blubbering mess. And you were gonna have it. 

You rolled your hips against him, his fingers digging into the soft skin of your hips. He let out a choked gasp, his head falling back against the bed.

“You like that baby?” You asked, dragging your hips up and down against him. 

“Fuck yes.” He whined, arching his back off the bed, wrapping his arms around your waist and burying his head into your chest. You rocked back and forth, Five’s fingernails dragging down your back. You moaned, pushing him back against the bed. You leaned back, propping yourself up on his thighs as you jutted your hips forward again and again. That familiar coil tightening in your stomach. “F-fuck.” He cried, his hips jolting against your pelvis, his pubic hair rubbing at your clit. His eyes shone with unshed tears as he bit his lip, his hands gripping the sheets beneath you. 

“You feel so good, you make me feel so good Five.” You huffed, struggling to keep up your pace. He whimpered a tear falling down his cheek. Suddenly his body jolted, his hands gripping your waist holding you down onto his hips as he came with a cry. You grinned against him, reaching your own orgasm. You moaned, high pitched and breathy as his cock twitched inside you. His cum painting your walls as you clenched down on him

“Christ woman.” He sighed, his arm covering his eyes. You pulled away his arm, wiping away a stray tear.

“Glad to be of service.” You asked sweetly, kissing his cheek before pecking his lips. You slowly got off of his lap, his softened cock slipping out of you. You laid down beside him, lightly trailing your fingers over his chest. He wraps his arm around you, pulling you closer. Your head laying on his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart against your ear. 

“I love you.” He says, breaking the comfortable silence.

“Are you thinking of someone else?” You tease, staring up at him through your lashes. 

“No.” He says, rolling his eyes feigning annoyance. He sits up, you prop yourself up on your arm. “I’m serious,” he cups your face, “I love you so goddamn much.” He says kissing you. You were sure you had died and gone to heaven. His hand against your face, with his soft slightly bruised lips against yours. You sighed into the kiss, feeling like a love sick teenager.

“I love you.” You giggled wrapping your arms around his neck, “I love you, I love you.” You kissed the corner of his lips, his cheek, his forehead. He chuckled softly, as you met his eyes. “I love you Five Hargreeves.” You whispered, resting your forehead against his.

“And I you.” He smiled. Five would happily add anything pertaining to you into his routine any day. 

[radioisntdead]

Is there a possibility for a sequel to "The Radio Man's Wife" ?

Good evening my dear! Indeed there is I've had quite a few folks request it! Originally the radio man's wife was supposed to be a one and done deal but now it's progressed into a two and done deal! Hope you enjoy!

The radio demon's wife

Alastor x female reader

Warnings!!

Cannibalism, murder, there's slightly more Alastor in this, still victim blaming the dead people, this is a little messy

This is a part two to this fic here

Alastor's death was a weak spot for him, a shameful death in his opinion, he, the charming radio host Alastor was mistaken for a deer of all things and shot, bullet through his head and bitten by dogs.

Not only was the title of being a radio host ripped away, the job he had worked so hard for, that he had clawed his way up too, that he had killed competitors for, that he genuinely enjoyed, it was gone just like that! Now he'd have to start all over again, not to mention he had left his dear wife behind.

She'd join him eventually, she was just as messed up as he was, but still! It was such an inconvenience.

She died quicker then he would've thought, not even giving him a chance to properly prepare for it,

she'd always been resourceful, one of her traits he was fond of, perhaps the heartbreak had gotten to her? How flattering.

She had managed to hunt down find Mimzy and well, knowing Mimzy she just HAD to reunite the lovebirds, or deers in this case.

She was in Mimzy's speakeasy, sat at the bar sipping on some type of alcoholic drink as she watched the performer on stage sing, she looked different, with deer ears much like his own, they twitched ever-so-slightly, her skin was a more unnatural color, candy shaped markings could be seen from just beneath the hems of her dress.

She was just as lovely as when he saw her last.

Static filled the air as he walked in, and Mimzy called him over, he saw as his wife's face change at the mention of his name, twirling around her face lit up at the sight of him.

Shouting his name she stumbled out of her seat, drink hastily placed on the bar counter as she rushed over, eyes bright and filled with pure adoration as she linked her arm with his.

She'd tut at the state of the home her dear Alastor stayed at, drenched in red, a deer head hung on the wall and there were a concerning amount of radios, she worried her Alastor was becoming a hoarder, she added her touches in rather quickly, banishing the radios to their own room much to Alastor's displeasure, but compromise was expected in marriage.

Now that the two were reunited nothing could tear them apart, as Alastor climbed the ranks she did too, taking down overlords and collecting souls on their own merits.

She would grimace at his new found fondness for cannibalism, making him brush his teeth several times before she would give him a kiss or his weird haircut, much preferring his hair from when he was alive but much like the cannibalism, it for whatever reason wasn't a deal breaker, after all if sinners didn't want to be eaten they shouldn't have pissed off Alastor, or ended up in cannibal Town!

She encouraged Alastor as he aimed for power, power he would've never been able to attain in life for multiple reasons, and he encouraged her to rise the ranks with him.

She kept the sickly sweet persona even if it wasn't needed, it came in handy with taking souls.

She became friends with Rosie, she was involved with the friendship between Vox and Alastor, at least until Vox got weird and tried to seduce Alastor, and when that didn't work tried to seduce his wife too, trying to get both of them thinking that was the issue.

The married ace deer man, and the also married ace deer woman, very smart of him to try to seduce them.

She was near Alastor throughout the years, it wasn't odd to see the pride ring's sweetheart and the radio demon walking around side by side.

But it was odd when she was often seen alone, repeatedly for the seven years Alastor had vanished.

She didn't need Alastor to survive but she did prefer him around, especially as others took his absence as a chance to woo her.

It did not end well for them, either perishing in a painful way, souls stolen, given to Rosie as a gift or another way she had thought of.

It was their fault for trying to take Alastor's place in her heart afterall!

As the years dragged on painfully slow, she built on her territory, gaining influence and power.

The night Alastor returned she was fast asleep, arms wrapped around the feral catlike creature that resembled him.

Alastor slid in a key to the door of their home, quietly entering and closing the door behind him.

Not much of their little ol' home had changed in his absence, the same decorations hung on the walls, the mounted deer that his [name] disliked was still there in the living room, although now with a tacky top hat on it for whatever reason, the couches were the same, there was a vintage TV set Infront of the couch that he frowned at, he would have to dispose of that later.

He walked through the room and into the halls, hooves tapping against the floors as he traveled,

His grin widened as he opened the bedroom door creeping in and standing above his sleeping wife, watching.

He shook his head at cat creature, making a motion for it to move, it refused, resulting in Alastor picking the lil' guy up and tossing him to the side of the bed before looking down at his now awaking wife.

She screamed at the glowing red eyes staring at her in the dark, grabbing a pillow and launching it at Alastor before she reached for the lamp.

Alastor had another pillow thrown at him after the light was turned on and she recognized him.

While Alastor had proclaimed the position of being the Facility manager of the Hazbin Hotel She had called dibs on promoting the hotel via different means, newspaper, social media, [much to Alastor's disapproval but he couldn't do much about it, sucks to be him]

Did she completely believe in the whole redemption idea? Not really but watching things progress in the hotel as time went on was fun!

She was known as a sweetheart, a saint when she was alive, she was known for being charming and being married to the equally charming radio man.

she was known for luring people in with her sweet venom coated words, for being ruthless when the situation called for it.

She was now known by her friends at the hotel as the cheerful publicist that for whatever reason married the creepy smile guy even though she could do better, she was known for being somewhat supportive of Charlie's aspirations.

She eventually would stand back and watch as Alastor aimed to take advantage, more then likely betraying them in the end, trying to undo his deal that not even she knew the details of, but for now she would sit comfortably at the bar, sipping on some type of sweet drink watching as Charlie organized another exercise with Angel dust cracking an inappropriate joke, with Vaggie giving him a disapproving look, with Husk taking a swig of his drink, with Niffty doing Niffty things, with Sir Pentious and his eggs listening intently, and with Alastor standing by with that neverending smile of his.

Good evening folks! This isn't my best work, I didn't know how to really make a part two to the Radio man's wife but hopefully y'all enjoyed! Assuming everything goes to plan a platonic Rosie fic should drop tomorrow! So tune on in to that, until we meet again folks!

[stellocchia]

Extended Chromatic Crew Gyftmas headcanons, one day late because I've been busy as Hell:

Killer made everyone some holiday-themed sweaters with them as cats on the front, aside from Delta. He made Delta a neon orange sweater with "Delta" written in black on the front in the plainest font you can imagine.

Delta got everyone colorful or funny socks aside from Killer. He got him a box of the most basic white socks he could find.

Everyone else initially assumed that this was them yet again antagonizing each other but no. They actually discussed beforehand what they wanted because they didn't want to ruin Gyftmas for everyone else by bickering. Delta thought his sweater was hilarious and Killer, knowing Epic was gonna gift him some clothing dyes, couldn't wait to personalize his socks. It's sweet for once.

Color made personalized photo diaries for everyone with all the pictures of them he collected throughout the past year. He added a date and a small explanation of the picture and why it was so important to him next to each photo.

Cross ugly cried after going through his photo diary. It was what made him realize that he truly has a family again. Of course, he knew he belonged with them even before, but it was an important moment for him.

Dust pretended not to care about his diary, but he actually stashed it under his pillow because he knew he'd love to revisit it on bad days.

Talking about Dust, he didn't prepare any presents for anyone. He thought nobody would have given him one and he didn't want to come off as if he cared about them more than they cared about him. He felt like shit after everyone handed him a present (even if Color assured him that his company was enough of a gift), so he spent the whole evening making everyone fun non-alcoholic cocktails to make up for it.

Horror was unsure of what to do and what would be appropriate since he hadn't been celebrating since well before getting kidnapped by Nightmare, so, in the end, he hand-carved and hand-painted some tree ornaments for everyone (he vaguely remembered people sticking ornaments to the beast in the woods for Gyftmas and he figured it would work out well enough).

Epic got a wooden replica of his favorite rubber chicken and he was absolutely delighted. He kept playing with it the whole evening and ended up not even putting it on the tree. He also insisted that it was a pity that skeletons don't have ears because he would have totally used it as an earring.

Cross got everyone gift cards to their favorite shops. He wanted to do something more personal, but the anxiety of his gifts not being good enough got the better of him. The fear froze him in place any time he tried to think about something different. Epic offered to go with him next year, and hopefully, that will ease some of his anxiety.

Epic's gifts were the most varied. He got Killer clothing dyes, he got Delta a new and sturdier mannequin for his training, Cross a body pillow with his favorite character on it, Dust a bartender manual, specifically for alcohol-free stuff (Dust is doing his best to kick his addictions and everyone else is very supportive of this), he got Color a cool new camera, and Horror a phone that he created himself that works for interdimensional calls, so he can contact his brother whenever he wants even when he's with them, and them when he's with him.

Delta and Cross managed to break Delta's present that very day by getting into a dumb context on who could punch it the hardest. Delta won and Cross was still salty about it even the day after.

Killer somehow found out what everyone's presents for him would be well before Gyftmas, but he had the decency to feign surprise regardless.

Undoubtedly, the most genuine shocked reactions came from Dust. He woke up that morning telling himself he'd get through the miserable day by breaking his vow not to drink and getting shitfaced only to see a huge pile of presents under the tree and breaking into a cold sweat.

Color took a million pictures throughout the day and told everyone to expect a family photo diary soon.

Horror prepared the entire meal by himself despite Color's many offers because he just cannot bring himself to eat anything if he doesn't know 100% what's in it (specifically if he doesn't see every single step of the preparation). He also locked the door to the kitchen the whole day and day prior so he was sure that nobody could tamper with the food.

To try and help him with this fear, they spent the a couple of hours the day before making cookies together out in the living room, all positioned in a way he could see their movements, and he actually managed to eat a couple of those, which was a big win for him.

[genderqueerdykes]

it’s unbelievably comforting to know that you’re therian/otherkin as a younger person who’s identified that way for years as well. people like you are ones i look up to for being my most authentic self and you remind me that it’s not a phase and i’m ALLOWED to be who and what i am ^_^

aww thank you! and hey of course, that's why i try to talk about it so often. i've identified as nonhuman since i was a child, but i've been a part of the online nonhuman community since 2010. i first joined the furry community as someone who genuinely identified as their sona, then the otherkin/therian/etc. communities when someone i followed on here came out as a dragon otherkin.

over the years we've realized a few nonhuman identities. we're not all one person so some of these will only apply to some, but we state that we collectively identify as a wolf, coyote, dog, & horse therian, and we have a lot of elf and dragon otherkin in our system, as well as other identities that are less common but important to the individuals who have them! many of us are undead, some are angels and demons.

i instantly became very involved in the community! i became staff on many different forums over the years and tried to help out when and where i could. i was very active under a lot of different usernames due to our DID, but i've tried to interact with others and help people understand that identifying as nonhuman isn't a bad, scary, or dangerous thing. it's not a problem. it's just how that person experiences their life and how they see themselves!

you're not doing anything wrong by identifying as a nonhuman. this belief is held across many cultures, all throughout human history. it's been well documented and recorded over the course of human history on every continent we've lived on and it's not going away any time soon. we are meant to be in nature. we are meant to be around other animals. humans ARE a species of animal- we are not above the animal kingdom, we are a part of it. it's only natural to relate to other animals.

you're perfectly fine being your authentic nonhuman self! i'm glad i can help you feel more comfortable in that. you are genuinely not harming anyone, that is a them problem if they have any issues with it. you are just being yourself! :) take care, stay safe, feel free to stop by again!

[httpiastri]

paul aron's hair throughout the 2024 season 💁‍♂️

(also known as pt2 of jack being obsessed with a certain blonde curly-haired boy)

hello everyone and happy new year! i hope your 2024 has been lovely and that 2025 provides you with tons of joy and love. 💗

i'm back again with yet another paul hair appreciation post! i loved making it last year and so ive been thinking about it all year and collecting pics 🥰 last year i remember having to search really hard fo some of the pics – two weekends i even had only three pics 😭 but this year i've really had to kill my darlings because i've deleted so so many pics that i like just bcs i didn't want to make this too overwhelming... and i still ended up over 300 pictures..... 😶

last two things before we get started: the wind is my best friend nowadays because of how it affects his hair. so many pics here of his hair in all kinds of directions (and esp the gifs).... anD if you see any pic here that you want in it's original form, lmk and i'll post it for you!! i will keep the pics saved on my phone for a few days before i delete them to make space lol.

soooo hope you enjoy!! and check out last year's edition hereee if you want. 💗

‎‎ ‎

bahrain

some pics from before the season started (testing & media days) and some from the first weekend! very messy at times, esp after sessions, but very cute. feels like maybe this was before he started caring a lot abt his hair and how it looks even during the race weekends? if you get what i mean? like some weekends it looks a bit too perfect that it feels like he made sure it looked like that… maybe? anyways very cute!

‎‎ ‎

jeddah

pretty long hair? very cute!! also looked pretty light despite how dark it was there when they drove during the evening etc. the middle row from the prema lap from when he was talking to ollie 🫶

‎

melbourne

shorter than in jeddah so a little haircut? looks pretty thin also?? hmm but very curly 🥰 love the middle and most right pics in the top row also lmao, love mid-workout expressions 😁

‎

formula e

pics both from his tests and his race round in fe! his hair looks so fried in the top left pic eye 😭 it was very fly-y this weekend? wanted to escape everywhere all the time so i had tons of pics of little strands everywhere! curls go crazy 🥹

‎

imola

looks very dark here actually!! and kinda short also? love the little tips of the curls like that too aaaaa 😭 and the ways some certain individual curls are so spirally and just……. aaaaaa cute

‎

monaco

love the sight of his hair poking out of his cap/balaclava etc (first three pics) aaaaaa !!!! and his hair in the belvita pic 😭 looks like he has little horns :(( so messy and cute. and the post-race interview? it was high at the back that it looked like one of those old hairstyles??? idk what its called but i think you understand

‎

barcelona

also very dark despite the sun! 😯 and not super fluffy or cute etc but still yk very good hair. 😌

‎

spielberg

TOP LEFT PIC. THE LITTLE 🌱. I CANNOT TAKE THIS GUYS I JUST CANT. his hair after the sprint race was truly something new also…. i mean yes it was very warm so obvs very sweaty but damn it looks so crazy 😭 (stupidly enough i didnt put them together, but it's the top four pics on the right side and bottom two on the left side)

‎

silverstone

bad weekend race-wise but amaaazinnggggg weekend hair-wise. so so long curls, so curly, so poofy!! actually probably my favorite hair weekend. just so adorable. never needed to brush my fingers through his locks this much before….

‎

hungaroring

pole aron >>> everything 🥰 dont have a lot to say, i just adore the post-race messiness and esp in combination with his pink cute cheeks? also maybe i shouldnt comment his looks since this is a hair post buttt the middle pic on the left side? baby baby baby???? (and the middle middle pic still gives me nightmares ngl)

‎

spa

probably my second fave hair weekend? so so light!!! actually managed to sneak a pic i took of him into this 🥺 (the quality is terrible BUT i took it!! yay!!!!) i actually never watched this episode of "chasing the dream" until last night (was heartbroken bcs of the feature 🥲) and oh my goD it was such a good paul episode? so so many amazing paul shots?? of his hair yes but just him in general and his cute face and his smile?? his pretty baby blue eyes?!?!?!!!??!!!!! insane. will be watching it every night to have happy sweet dreams 🥰

‎

summer break

cowboy paul 🤠 hair looked a lot lighter after his italy visit but idk how much time he actually spent in the sun? considering his fair northern european skin? (like im also northern european so i know it's hard to keep your hair in the sun to bleach it and still keep your skin safe 🥲) it was SO hard to make this collage without spending five hours just staring at his abs, ngl.

‎

monza

why do the top four pics give me like… golf vibes? like he's sitting there trying to see if the ball went into the hole?? ANYWAYS. kinda dark considering how light it looked during the summer break?? but very defined curls. *chefs kiss*

‎

baku

not as curly as sometimes, just… very messy? kinda flat at times, pretty light and fluffy other times. very cute nonetheless <33 (also speaking of him and his hairline… some pics here are ruthless in that way aaaa)

‎

qatar

looove the way the hair curls around the cap he's wearing when he's out in the wind!! like he has some kind of fluffy padding in it yk?? b a b y. the pics of him right after the feature race are crazy, the hair is everywhere but i understand that he had other things to care about 😭

‎

abu dhabi

the pics on the far right are from a vid on the f2 story from that weekend and i was kinda heartbroken that i chose the collage format to only include his hair and not his facial expressions, because he was SO babyboy in that video. (it's still available in their story highlights! check it out if you havent seen it yet!!!) the curls are so defined and curly but so so pretty, like not very messy just !!! feels like maybe he properly styled them very well this weekend? because the curls look so perfect at times that im like "yeah he didnt just wake up like that". (and that's more than okay!!! 🥰) except for when he just got out of the car lmao like the bottom left pic. insane

‎

other breaks/postseason

mixed pics from random breaks, and pics from after the season (like his seat fitting with alpine)! some of the pics from the parc ferme photoshoot are also very very 🌱, like the top two on the column row! adorableeeee!! the curls also look definitely styled from the family's trip to rome? and the bottom two pics of the second and third column from some forest visit with karl, the hair was adorable :(

‎

gifs !!!

just some random gifs of his hair movement 🫶 as ive already said, i love the wind! thank you mother nature for your hard work!!! also paul running and his hair flopping up and down like a dog's ears will NEVER get old, just saying

if anyone made it this far, thank you for looking & reading!! hope you enjoyed and hope you're maybe at least somewhat near as obsessed as me <33

[kuwdora]

Saturday Morning Vid Recs - FEELINGS & THAT DYNAMIC

Alright, here is yet another post for @poetikat of vids from days gone by and the recent past. I love and adore the vids. I think people should watch them for a much-needed boost to the heart and soul.

I’m calling this collection of recs FEELINGS & THAT DYNAMIC (capital letters!) because of how big and immersive the emotional experience is while watching them.

❤️❤️❤️❤️

I Gotta Feeling by CountessMary. The Muppets (The Muppet Movie, The Great Muppet Caper, Muppets Take Manhattan, and Muppets in Space). A throwback to the dance club party Club Vivid 2010. Tonight’s gonna be a good night!!!

Uptown Funk by @revolutionarygirlshati (Legend of Korra). An incredible addition to the uptown funk canon of vids!! Korra is so damn expressive!

C’mon by rhoboat. Inside Out (2015). C’mon, c’mon with everything falling down around me, I’d like to believe in all the possibilities. Perfect song and lyrics for this film. ❤️❤️❤️❤️ So many big feelings.

You Told the Drunks I Knew Karate by @settiai. Doctor Who. Amy/Rory. This is the first vid I think of when I think of this pairing, I can’t get enough of it!

For Your Entertainment by such_heights Legends of Tomorrow. Again there is something exquisite about using this song for this source. Legends of Tomorrow is so cracky and bizarre. This vid made in the earliest seasons of the show while it was airing and fucking nails it. The legends truly are here for our entertainment, bwah.

Groove is in the Heart by giandujakiss. Doctor Who/Torchwood up through 2007. This is an oldie for sure but it’s so firmly embedded in my brain that this song now exists because of this vid. The vibes of the song is really wonderful and fun. Nine and Ten, Rose and Martha and Jack Harkness and Torchwood and friends and lovers. I love how it transitions from Nine to Ten and Torchwood and back again to Doctor Who.

True Love by @findmeinthealps. Cobra Kai OT4!! This vid is such a treat because it is a tapestry of slash and Johnny and Daniel’s love for their partners throughout and and and. They all just fit together, okay. One big karate family. Each section of this vid is more delightful and full of LOVE than the next.

Take On Me Doctor Who by @trelkez. Doctor Who, classic and New Who through 2010. I heartily rec all of trelkez vids, and especially all the Doctor Who vids. Picking this one out for this list was a no brainer. There’s just something wonderful about A-Ha being used for the partnership and adventure in this show. The part at 2:01 always makes me grin because trelkez has a great sense of musicality and humor.

Garden of Your Mind by @sandalwoodbox. Critical Role, Dungeons and Dragons. This is about storytelling and imagination. AND it utilizes a really cool remix of Mr. Roger’s voice. It’s so beautiful and I cry lots about it because I’m a sap and it’s really that powerful.

Life Less Ordinary by di_br / @why-the-face. Doctor Who. Nine/Rose. Di’s vids were my go-to when I started vidding back in 2007 and I was obsessed with all her Doctor Who vids. It turns out I still am obsessed. This vid makes my heart so warm and fuzzy and I absolutely have to rec this one after all these years because the Nine/Rose feelings are off the chart and span space and time.

I Do Adore by @kiki-miserychic. Adventure Time. Princess Bubblegum/Marceline. This is another oldie, and also for a show I've never seen but always been a fandom-in-law. This vid is so, so so sweet and sapphic and shows me exactly why Bubbline was so beloved.

Carries On by @monkeyswithjetpacks. Jim Henson and The Muppets. This vid brings the big cry about, too. It’s a wonderful tribute to Jim Henson and his work. I really love the music choice here which is The Magnetic Zeroes and there’s such a wide array of different sources from behind the scenes and the muppet shows. It is so beautiful.

Previous Saturday Morning Vid Recs:

Video Games

Women!

Space and Robots

Animals

Follow the tags to keep up with recs this fall:

#saturday morning vid recs

#kuwdora vid recs

#kuwdora recs

A guide I wrote for commenting on fanvids:

How to Leave Feedback on Fanvids

[mary-laib]

OKAY WRITING ABOUT JWCT SHIPS TIME:

Sammy x Yasmina

10/10

I love their relationship and how they have come so far throughout cc and ct. Also less to do with the ship but I especially loved how Yasmina was shown in ct to have worked towards facing her fears and has gotten so much further than Sammy, who has been ignoring her problems. There's like nothing to hate about this ship. Everyone agrees they're perfect.

Kenji x Brooklyn

3/10

I've been waiting for them to break up since they got together. She was great for him in the beginning of their relationship, helping him become his own person and becoming less egotistical, but she has refused to change with him, which has made their relationship stagnant. I thing their relationship was good for Kenji and I'm glad they got together if only so that she could help him figure out how to be his own man, but past that, their relationship was pointless and I hope it never gets rejuvenated.

Ben x Darius

8/10

I love them as bros and honestly, despite their obvious closeness and the fact that I would like to see more of their interactions, I see them as more platonic, especially with what Darius said about his crush on Brooklyn. Not because of him liking Brooklyn or girls in general and you'll see why in a minute. But I also wouldn't be mad to see them get together. They're both nerds and I love them.

Darius x Brooklyn

2/10

Honestly, I feel like the same things that caused a rift in Brooklyn's relationship with Kenji would also tear apart her relationship with Darius. And it's stated in the show that it's unrequited. They're good friends, but while he'd probably rate her as his top friend and vice versa, I feel like we can collectively agree that there are other friendships he has that are less toxic. Also the love triangle thing feels so weird when the girl cares less about both the guys combined than either one feels about her.

Darius x Nobody

9/10 The dots have been connected

Now hear me out: I don't feel like his crush has ruined things between him and Ben or Kenji, but some things about what he said regarding his crush and his reactions have made me feel like he is very aroace coded. Which has put a lot of things in perspective for me. Since the beginning of cc, he's been a "power of friendship" guy and rewatching his interactions with everyone, they seem a lot stronger and meaningful as just platonic, rather than romantic. And while everyone around him has been dealing with romance, he's just kind of indifferent to it all until Brooklyn. And his reaction to his crush on Brooklyn just screams repressed aroace with him saying that he never thought he could feel like that (has he never had a crush on anybody before) and how he has completely panicked regarding their relationship. Idk to me, it's giving aroace with a "fake" crush or demi aroace person who has taken way too long to fall for a girl that anybody else would have fallen for after the original bout of mortal danger. He had to be friends with her for YEARS before he could catch a semblance of a crush on her. And it also sounds to me like she was pretty absent in his life before popping in to stay with him for a week, which could also explain why he might he having a "fake" crush (if that is what it is). ALSO: when I say "fake" crush, I'm not trying to downplay his feelings, I'm just referring to something a lot of aroace people experience where you get really close to someone and mistake those feelings for love. And when it happens, these feelings are very intense(speaking from experience). Like how if he's suddenly frequently interacting with Brooklyn again and it's just them, I feel like that kind of situation could lead to an aroace crush. It's all just giving aroace person experiencing their first crush in the most traumatic way possible.

Brooklyn x Nobody

10/10 We love to see a gal feeling herself

I feel like at this point in the story, she has nothing to gain or give by being in a relationship with anybody in the show. Her and Kenji had a decent run while they had it, but it's time to let go at this point. If she does end up with someone, it has to be someone outside the main cast and personally, I'd like to see her with a gal pal. She has bi energy, especially with the new haircut.

Kenji x Darius

7/10

Honestly, I definitely shipped them mid-cc, but at the beginning of ct, I decided I did not want to see them get together. But by the end, I kind of changed my mind. I still think their relationship would be best platonic, but I also wouldn't be mad if they got together. It'd probably be a bit stranger than if Darius was with Ben, but they've also got a strong connection.

Ben x Kenji

0/10

I feel like they've hardly gotten any relationship building in either cc or ct and it needs to happen pronto. There has to be something they can bond over

Sammy x Yasmina and Ben

10/10

I'd like to see the lesbians in a qpr with their hypeman. Ben is just so cute with them and he loves them so much (platonically) and vice versa. It doesn't need to be anything official, but just more of Ben being their third wheel/adopted son would make the show more perfect than it already is.

Ben x His European GF

2/10

I think she's fake, either that he's lying about her so he doesn't lose street cred or that she is lying to him and is a catfish. Maybe we'll see a plot twist relating to the gf, but I'm not holding out hope. She could be redeemed if she was a real girl who was a total kickass and saved the whole group (maybe they meet her at the end of their stowaway boat mission) but otherwise I don't really care about her. Also don't lose hope, people who hc him as gay or aro, there's always the chance that he's bi, lying, or having a "fake" crush like Darius. I know I, as an aroace person have had more online than irl relationships and I'm p sure that's a sign of not being allo, especially when the person you're dating is far away and you have no plans of ever seeing them irl.

Anyways thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.

[clarisse0o]

Camp Wiegman-Part 65

Lucy Bronze x Ona Batlle

Alternative Universe : Military School

Words : 5k

Masterlist

———————————————————————

Tuesday, March 2nd; 4:50 p.m. - in Class  

I tap my foot while staring at my watch. The end is near. Like most days, we finish with Management, with Mr. Johnson. There's not a single day we don't see him anyway. Today, our two hours were interesting. For once, I more or less understood what we were working on. We even ended with exercises that I finished before most of my classmates. He announced that we would correct them in the next class, and they would count as homework if we hadn't finished. That's good news. I've already completed my other assignments, so besides having my exercises checked in this class, I won't have anything to do. There are still a few minutes left, so I wait, tapping my foot impatiently. It’s dragging on. Only five minutes have passed, and ten remain before the bell rings.

"Have you already finished?" Alessia murmurs.

"Mm-hmm."

"You're starting to outdo me," she jokes.

I giggle softly, shrugging. I'm lucky to understand things easily. Lucy definitely had something to do with it because, before, Management and I were not on good terms.

"Could you stop tapping your foot?"

"Sorry."

I stop immediately. In truth, I’m eager because I plan to meet Lucy after this last class. I’ve noticed that toward the end of the year, people are much calmer, so it’s the perfect time to spend time with her. She doesn't have to look after as many students anymore. Of course, she has spent a lot of time focusing on me, but I know she’s been responsible for several first-year students. When I asked her about it again on Sunday, she said she’d released many after two months since they weren’t rebels—like me. As for the others, she explained that Wiegman reassigned the toughest cases to Ingrid when I arrived so Lucy could prioritize me. She was right to do that, and I’m grateful. I admit that I must have been quite a handful when I arrived. I often regret being so cold and difficult. Mr. Johnson interrupts my thoughts by standing up from his chair, catching the attention of several students, including Alessia, who was still working on the exercises. It’s surprising because, according to my watch, there are still five minutes left. I doubt he’s going to let us go early.

"Alright, we’ll stop for today. You can pack your things, and as I mentioned earlier, the rest is due tomorrow. I’ll check that everything’s been done."

"Are you letting us out early?" a student asks.

"No, I have something to discuss with you."

Several groans echo throughout the room at this news.

"Yes, yes, I know. It’s so boring being stuck here with me," he mocks. "If I finish what I have to say quickly, we can renegotiate," he adds.

Strangely, everyone quickly starts packing up. He waits until they’re done to get everyone’s attention.

"Alright. I wanted to let you know that your class has been granted a field trip. We’ll be visiting a nearby industrial company to show you how it operates."

He begins distributing papers to everyone.

"Obviously, I expect this exercise to benefit you, so attached, you’ll find a company profile of the place we’ll visit. Some details are missing, so it’ll be up to you to find them."

"How are we supposed to do that without access to computers?" one student asks.

"I know you're allowed to have computers in your rooms," he replies. "And if you don't have one, there are computers available in the library."

The student grimaces slightly. I imagine he’s one of those who don’t have one. I haven’t had many chances to go to the library since I spend a lot of time in Lucy’s office, but I know it’s not a popular place. Few people like going there. They’d much rather spend time in their rooms or the common room.

"Do we have to fill out the second sheet too?" another student asks.

"No, that one is for the field trip. I expect you to take notes and complete this small questionnaire. I’ll collect the sheets to ensure you’ve done the work, and then we’ll go over them in the next class after the trip."

"Will it just be you supervising?"

A small laugh escapes him. His news has managed to excite everyone. Outings must not be granted often here. Usually, we’re confined within the school’s walls.

"In addition to me, your Management teacher and two instructors will accompany you. You’ll be divided into four groups to keep you focused and well-supervised."

"Can we choose who to go with?"

"Definitely not. The groups are already assigned, and no changes will be possible. I expect you to respect my choices. The supervisors will have a list of students in their group, so you won’t be able to cheat. All you’ll achieve by trying is wasting everyone's time and earning yourself a punishment."

He says this as he walks past me. He looks at me intensely. I feel like he has an issue with me ever since he started seeing me in Lucy’s office. If only he knew what I was thinking… I smile to provoke him. We both know I’ll be with Lucy, and he doesn’t seem to like the idea. I had noticed his displeasure when Lucy made the request. He ignores me and walks down my row to return to his desk. The bell rings just then.

"Alright, I’ll let you go. Don’t lose the papers, please. I’ll inform you of the trip date in the next class. Have a great rest of your day."

Having already packed our bags, most of us head straight for the door. Alessia and I follow calmly. Leah and Alba, on the other hand, have already rushed out with the first group.

"Did you know about this?" Alessia asks. "You were one of the few who didn’t react."

"I did, yeah. He suggested it to L—uh, Bronze when I was in her office," I catch myself.

"Oh. So, she’s the one accompanying us?"

"Yeah, along with Engen."

I have to think before I speak. It’s so complicated to use their titles when I know their first names and spend time with them outside of class.

"I see… Well-informed, huh?" she teases softly. "Do you know which group you’re in?"

"I only know I’ll be with Bronze," I shrug. "She used her position to make that happen," I admit with a small smile. "But I can’t tell you yet if we’ll be together."

"Well, I guess I’ll just have to wait."

"I’ll try to find out if we’re in the same group once she has her list. I can’t guarantee anything. She can be pretty unpredictable sometimes. And for all I know, she might not get it until the day of the trip."

"Thanks, that’s nice of you. Are you going to meet her now?"

"Yep. I’ve done my homework, but I’d like to review, and it’s the only place where I know I’ll have some peace and quiet outside of my room. Except in my room, I tend to get a bit too distracted…"

"Yeah, I totally get that," she laughs. "You don’t have to explain yourself, you know."

"No, but… You get it. I don’t want you thinking I’m ditching you for her or anything like that. I’m just really focused on exams. I can’t afford to fail this year."

"I understand. She’s doing a great job. I’ve noticed that you’ve been following classes better lately. It’s different from the beginning of the semester," she teases.

I laugh, nodding. It’s true; things were different back then. Since I didn’t understand anything, I would zone out easily. I’ve made a lot of progress since I returned. Lucy advised me to ask my teachers for summaries of previous years’ classes. Of course, they gave them to me, and I plan to start studying them today. I hope Lucy will have time for me. I never know what she has planned for the day.

"Alright, see you later."

"Yes, have a good afternoon."

We part ways at the bottom of the stairs in the hall. I knock on the slightly closed office door and enter. I’m surprised to find another student in my usual spot in front of Lucy. She doesn’t seem to have noticed me yet, as she’s filling out a form with him. So, I turn to Ingrid and wave hello.

"Hey Ona," she greets me with a smile. "How are you? »

"—Good, and you?"

"—Great."

Since classes resumed, we haven't had many opportunities to see each other. It's a shame because I really like her.

"—What are you doing here?" my girlfriend asks me.

"—Hey... Uh... Well, I finished classes. I have some reviewing to do, but I can come back later if you're busy."

The guy sitting across from her looks at me strangely. To him, I must look like an alien. I must be the only one who willingly comes to my supervisor's office. His face doesn't ring a bell, but judging by his appearance, I'd say he's younger than me. He must be a first-year student under Lucy's supervision. To get my attention, my girlfriend clears her throat.

"—I'll be a little while. He just got here. Can you go over this with her, Engen? Or do you have something else to do?" she asks her friend.

"—No, it's fine," she replies, gesturing for me to sit with her. "But I can't guarantee I'll be as good as your supervisor," she teases me.

"—I'll make do with what I have, what can I say."

She laughs at my joke before ordering me to take out my things. I quickly realize that she intends to be as serious as Lucy, which suits me perfectly. I need that authority to make sure I stay focused.

"—Is that Ona Batlle?" murmurs the student facing Lucy.

I turn around amused to watch them. I immediately meet Lucy's threatening gaze. I quickly understand that I should stay out of it.

"—We have something to do, don't you think?" suggests Lucy.

"—I've never seen her before," he continues.

"—Do you want me to let you go? I can always change my mind, you know."

"—Come on, let's get to work," Ingrid pulls me toward her.

"—Um..."

"—What do you want to work on?"

"—Management and accounting."

"—Wonderful," she murmurs. "All my favorites... She owes me for this."

I chuckle softly. First, I put away the sheets my teacher just handed out. Since we'd already packed everything, no one had bothered to put them in their bags, myself included. Then I take out my famous summary notes.

"—These are the courses from previous years. I need to work on them," I explain to her.

"—Let me see."

It wasn't Ingrid who asked me, but Lucy. I look up to see her behind me. I hand her my notes without thinking.

"—You finally took my advice. It was about time. Here, have her do some exercises; I have a site you'll love," she tells Ingrid as she passes behind her desk.

She types something on the keyboard, and I take the opportunity to glance at the student. He was just looking at me. He immediately turns back to his work. He's working on a worksheet, from what I can see. I wonder what it could be.

"—Ona," my girlfriend calls me.

"—Yes?" I say, turning back to her.

I then notice some sheets in front of me and the printer running. I feel like I'm going to have a blast... Especially given the number of worksheets that are coming out.

"—What's this site?"

"—I found it when I had some free time. There are lots of practice exercises; I thought it would be cool for you."

"—Awesome, and there are even answer keys for us," Ingrid rejoices.

I roll my eyes with a small smile. Unlike Lucy, this must not be her area of expertise if she's reacting like that. She seems to dislike it. I wonder what she studied, actually. Will she stay here her whole life? That's also a question I won't hesitate to ask Lucy, or even Ingrid directly.

"—Alright, get to work. I'll take over once Kyle leaves."

She pats my shoulder before returning to her desk.

"—So, back to us. Are you almost done?"

I stop listening to them and focus on the sheets to see what they are. They're exercises from chapters I didn't study in the first two years. The number of them makes me lose motivation. It's not really something I enjoy either, but well, I have no choice but to work now. Ingrid mocks my expression as she brings me the rest of the stack. I feel like crying seeing the whole pile.

"—Do I have to do all of this?" I complain desperately.

"—Of course not. We just printed everything at once. Do the ones you feel like, but it would be best to work on as many as possible in the coming months."

I relax a bit. She's right; I still have a few months to do everything. I nod and take the small stack before starting the first worksheet. The exercise seems short and simple, so I might as well start with easy things. I'll vary gradually until tonight with other, more difficult exercises. I start calmly, not rushing. I have barely finished one exercise that I've given to Ingrid when Kyle gets up from his chair.

"—Don't make me regret my choice, alright?"

"—Yes, I'll try."

"—No, you'll make sure you don't end up here again."

He doesn't respond, but I know he does when she says:

"—Go on, off you go."

I hear papers being gathered and a chair creaking. I'm forced to turn around to look at them again.

"—Thank you, Bronze..."

Our eyes meet for a moment as he heads toward the exit. He stops in front of the door to give me a gentle smile. I return it out of politeness.

"—You're famous here. I'm glad to have seen you at least once. I'm almost a fan of yours."

His comment earns him a smack on the head from Lucy. I laugh discreetly. That wasn't very smart of him.

"—I haven't signed the form yet, so you'd better leave before I change my mind."

That was all it took for the poor kid to flee the office. Lucy sighs while scribbling on the paper in front of her.

"—Well, you've started quite a movement too," comments Ingrid as I return to my exercises.

"—I didn't ask for anything," I reply, shrugging. "As long as it's in a good way, I don't care."

"—It's not especially in a good way," grumbles Lucy from her corner. "This one gave me quite a bit of work to set him straight, if you know what I mean."

"—Well, you just released him, didn't you?"

"—Lucy usually releases her students around December, or even January for the more headstrong ones," Ingrid tells me in a whisper.

"—Oh..."

I don't know what else to say. It's not like I encouraged these young people to act rebellious. I was too busy with myself to be concerned with others' behavior. I wasn't surprised that the young man who just left was one of the last rebels. He had an angelic face that I would describe as popular. That's certainly what he was before coming here. I jump when the office door slams. Lucy comes toward us and, with a hand gesture, asks me to push back my chair. I barely have time to do so before she sits on my lap. With her hand, she grabs my neck, and her lips capture mine firmly. I respond without flinching. I don't know why she's doing this, but I'm not going to complain. She's offering me more and more private contact, whereas she insisted at the beginning that we keep our distance. She finally sighs and settles against me so that her head rests against my shoulder.

"—Seems like someone had a long day."

"—Mm-hmm," she sighs. "I just released my last student."

"—No. You still have me."

She laughs softly, placing a kiss on my exposed neck. I've given up on my exercises since it's impossible to do anything in this position. I'm forced to hold Lucy to prevent her from slipping off my lap.

"—Naturally. You'll remain an exception until the end," she says.

"—That's for sure," I giggle. "Have you already told Wiegman that you won't be here next year?"

"—No," she murmurs. "I'm going to wait a bit before requesting a meeting."

"—No kidding. She's going to fall into depression when you go," Ingrid mocks. "You were her favorite. »

Lucy shrugs indifferently in response.

"You have to know what you want in life. Right?" she asks, sliding her hand under my sweater.

"Yeah," I murmur. "And what about you? Are you planning to stay here much longer?" I ask Ingrid.

"I don't know. Definitely next year, then we'll see."

"What did you study, if it's not too personal?"

"Social work," she replies. "I plan to seriously look for a job next year."

"I already told you, if you do your degree in sports, we could hire you with Jenni," Lucy says to her.

"I know, I know," she rolls her eyes. "I'll wait to see if your thing works before I commit," she teases.

"There’s no reason it won’t work," I defend.

She smiles mischievously but says nothing more. Lucy finally grabs the exercise I was working on.

"How's it going? Are you managing?"

"Not really," I mumble. "I'm feeling overwhelmed seeing all I have to review. I’m never going to make it."

"Don’t say that. I've never seen a student as hardworking as you," she says with a touch of amusement.

"It's only because you motivate me. Otherwise, trust me, I would've given up already."

"But you won’t give up. Otherwise, I’ll go on strike with kisses and cuddles," she threatens me. "That’d be silly, right before our one-month anniversary," she adds quietly.

I smile, knowing full well that our one-month anniversary is tomorrow. I've been thinking about it and planning our weekend since Monday with Mapi. She’s also celebrating her one-month anniversary with Ingrid. We have the upper hand, being in Barcelona.

"Seriously? Using that as leverage? That’s blackmail!"

"Is it working?" she asks with a mischievous grin.

"Of course. You're such a brat."

"Careful what you say. I can still use my rank to make you run laps outside."

She pinches my belly, which she had been caressing, making me squeal. I pout to show her I don't like it, even though I understand her reasons.

"No need to pull that face," she laughs, getting up.

She stretches in front of me. The position probably wasn’t very comfortable. Still, I would've liked her to stay a little longer. The warmth she created by cuddling against me is already fading. Unfortunately, she can't stay in that position forever, considering where we are.

"Grab your stuff and come with me."

"Now that I was so comfortably settled," I complain.

"You can stay here, but you’ll be all alone," Ingrid teases as she gets up too.

"Are you leaving?"

"Yep, I'm going for a walk to keep the peace," she says with a wink. "Don’t use it as an excuse to fool around."

I laugh, shaking my head. She hands my first paper back to Lucy, then leaves. Meanwhile, I switch positions. Lucy is already checking my work.

"I think we have some work to do," Lucy teases.

"Why do you say that?"

"Your exercises are far from correct," she laughs.

I groan in frustration, not even bothering to continue the previous exercise. I already know she’ll want to rework that part before moving on to the rest, and she’s right.

Tuesday, March 2nd; 8:30 PM – Ona and Alexia’s room.

"We haven’t seen much of you since the break ended."

Alexia throws this comment as we return to our room after dinner. To be honest, I would’ve preferred she bring it up another time. I’m exhausted. I could fall asleep right here. The pace is hard to get back into, and the revision sessions don’t help much with resting, as that’s all I’ve been doing.

"I know, sorry," I sigh, collapsing onto the bed.

"I overheard Alessia talking to her sister when she came back from class without you this afternoon. They think you’d rather spend time with your supervisor than with us, if you know what I mean."

Her tone is somewhat amused. I deduce she doesn’t think the same, thankfully. If even she starts judging me, I’m in trouble.

"I regret that they saw us at that convenience store. Now that they know, they think I prefer staying with Lucy. I told them it’s for study sessions. I even have proof if they need it."

My binder is full of exercises I do during evening sessions. If it were up to me, they’d all be in the trash.

"Well, apparently they think differently," she shrugs. "Don’t worry about it, let them talk. I just wanted to let you know."

"I doubt they’ll dare say anything to my face."

"I don’t think so either," she admits. "But who knows. At least now you’re prepared if it happens."

She closes the doors of her wardrobe, where she had been searching for her pajamas. Then, she turns and offers me a small, sympathetic smile. I wonder if she’s ever dealt with similar comments. Honestly, I’ve never asked her if anyone knows about her relationship with Jenni. Since I’ve been here, she mostly hangs out with me.

"I just think it might be a good idea to slow things down between you two here. You know how fast rumors spread."

"We’re not doing anything wrong," I sigh. "These study sessions were in place long before we got together. If they can’t understand that I want to pass my exam, that’s not my problem."

She nods, deciding to drop the subject. Instead, she heads to the shower. Meanwhile, I check in with Mapi about the weekend. Everything should be set now. We had already discussed it last week, just before she left. I still send her a message to make sure she’s booked everything. We have different plans, which is better. One-month anniversaries are meant to be enjoyed as a couple, after all. Now, I just need to make sure Lucy hasn’t planned anything. I’ll ask her tomorrow. Knowing her, she’s probably already planned something, but what? As for tomorrow, I’m pretty stuck. I don’t even have anything to give her, and I can’t really prepare something. My movements are being watched. The only thing I have to offer is a drawing that’s been lying at the bottom of my closet since Monday night. I feel almost foolish, considering this woman deserves all the love in the world. I just hope she’ll like the gesture... Anyway, it’s too late to plan anything else. When the shower stops running, I search for my things.

"It’s your turn," Ale says as she steps out of the bathroom, towel in one hand drying her hair, the hairdryer in the other.

"Thanks."

I grab a random pair of pajamas and some fresh underwear, then head to the bathroom. An idea sparks as I place my clothes on the counter next to the sink. I turn around and call out to Ale before she turns on the hairdryer.

"You’ve been in a long-term relationship—any ideas on what I could give Lucy for our one-month anniversary tomorrow?"

"Is that already tomorrow?" she asks in surprise.

"Mm-hmm... I did make her a drawing, but I feel silly only giving her that."

"Well, in your situation, it’s a bit tricky. Jenni always managed to plan things because she had more freedom than I did, but I have to admit I never gave her anything while we were here. I always made up for it when we saw each other outside."

I sigh and nod, a bit disappointed. I should’ve thought about it this weekend, though even then it would’ve been hard since we were at Lucy’s place.

"One month already," Ale whispers. "Time flies!"

"Yeah, no kidding," I giggle.

"When exactly was it? The night Korbin jumped on you?"

I wince but nod. I hate remembering that event. It feels so far away now and yet not that distant at all.

"Sorry," she grimaces, sensing it bothers me. "I didn’t mean to bring up bad memories."

"It’s okay, don’t worry. I’ll hop in the shower. Maybe the water will help me come up with ideas for tomorrow."

"Good luck," she teases softly.

I return to the bathroom as Ale starts drying her hair. I was hoping this moment would help me brainstorm ideas, but it didn’t. I sigh, giving up on planning anything. I’ll make it up to her this weekend.

[softspace-fics]

hey I’m sick and I was wondering if you could make one of either Steve Rogers or spiderman (Tom holland) taking care of a sick little

Sickie

Masterlist - All my work!

A/N - I know this is kind of a short one, I had to have dental work done today and I've also just been super busy today and in alot of pain but I hope that this helps you feel even a little bit better. I know you said one or the other, but I had an idea and could include both! Hope you like it!

Warnings⚠️: Sick little, PLATONIC RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN STEVE, PETER AND YOU, mainly fluff!!

---------------

Peter got worried when he heard your little coughs throughout the night. He had the room right next to your room, and had been doing some work on his suit when he first heard it. This meant that he had stayed up the whole night incase you woke up and needed a caregiver.

When you came out as a little, you had first been getting taken care of by Steve, seeing as he was the person who helped you to tell the rest of the team and was the first to find out. Soon after Steve started going on missions again, Peter helped to take care of you. It started more as he was a babysitter, but after a fe years, he’s taken on being a second caregiver.

When Steve got back from his 5am run, he was met by a worried peter sitting on the couch in the living room, waiting for the elder. 

“Steve they’ve been coughing all night. I think I heard them sneeze like 10 times too. I’m worried.” Peter stands up abruptly, almost starling Steve.

Steve looks at Peter concerned before quickly but quietly going over to your room and softly opening the door. He walks over to the edge of your bed before softly feeling your forehead. His eyes widen and he turns around to look at Peter who's standing there awkwardly with his hands in his pockets and anxiety written all over his face.

“They're like a furnace. Can you go get them a damp cloth and some meds? I'm gonna wake them up and see if I can get them into some cooler clothes.” Steve calmly whispers to Peter, who then speeds off to go collect the items requested.

Steve wakes you up gently,kissing your forehead and trying to softly help you out of dreamland. You softly whine, rubbing your eyes until Steve gently takes your hand from your face. 

“Hey sweetheart how're you feeling?” He asks gently.

All he can get out of you is a whine, you curl into him, feeling absolutely awful.

He softly coos before he gently picks you up and helps you to get more comfortable.

Peter comes back in the room a few minutes later with the items that steve sent him on a quest to find, and sees you laying with a thinner blanket stolen from his room, and one of steve's shirt on you. 

The rest of the day is spent with Steve and Peter each taking their time with you, getting you water, meds when you need them, and just ultimately making sure your comfortable and safe. That's the most important thing to them. 

[sandorsubs]

wiring your brain to control shifting

i was playing a video game but level was extremely hard. i shed blood and sweat, thinking "maybe this game is for pros and i'm not a good gamer" i was this close to give up but i wanted to see rest of the game so badly i kept trying. finally i passed it thinking it's just luck.

years later i played the game again. i hesitated at first but passed the same level in my first try. mind you i didn't become pro gamer or anything in all these years. it was just my brain wiring in the background, collecting data to find out what to do exactly but i've never realized this until i have to do it again.

if you ever said "i have never been able to do this throughout my life" for anything wait for a second and admit this is just a mental block you put between you and your desire. when you are wiring your brain, you don't realize it's happening, looks like nothing is changing or only little changes happening. because you don't see what's happening in background. it actually becomes easier but we don't care because if it's easier we are too focused on moving forward and achieving the desire.

then a random day it feels natural being able to do that. almost like you were born with this.

i've said this in my previous post, shifting isn't a skill/talent/sth related to luck or genetics. if you still think shifting is just one big change happens rarely and miraculously, please try to change that.

because shifting is just like water. it can be a drop or big ass ocean(depending on the changes in the realities). just because you've never seen an ocean, it doesn't mean you can't look at rain and say guess there has to be more.

you won't wire your brain to shift but to control it. if you aren't new to shifting, at least couple months passed since you've started your journey, your wiring has already started.

how wiring works for shifting?

i'll call this wiring path. you either stick to one thing you like or feel comfortable with, even a little interest is more than enough. or find an existing wiring path. the times you felt close to shifting for example. maybe a little voice keeps telling you this is your method. you probably have more than one wiring paths for shifting, but they are like unfinished projects. one of them must be more prominent, like at least 50% finished project.

after you've decided on your wiring path, it's not any different from achieving anything. you are not a monk, you won't be spending eternity if you are actively learning. do you know those clicking moments? you can meditate for thirty hours straight but a feeling or realization in one of your attempts takes wiring process further. and i gotta admit, maybe you needed those thirty hours meditation to realize this. that's what i love about wiring. nothing goes is in vain.

everything you do takes your wiring further.

if it feels like literally nothing is changing, you either work on more than one wiring paths or the process slowed down.

when you are not aware of this wiring, it's like pushing all the buttons and hope for best. that's what they mean by lock in. because trying everything at the same time or having backup methods is working on more than one wiring paths.

it's like learning ten languages at the same time but you are barely a1 in all of them.

like i said you have more than one wiring paths and they are unfinished projects, they all have potential. don't give them powers thinking one of them is better than the other. you make them work better with yourself. you have power to choose.

wiring from loa perspective

before loa folks come and say "so what you are saying is, you have to actually do sth to shift? stop planting assumptions in people's minds! i don't have to do anything to shift!"

baby, i'm gonna hold your hand while saying this, you assumption is also a work. you assumed you don't need 46 step method to shift or you have already shifted, right? good, i'm happy for you but see that's also a work. you still do something. you wire your brain this is how you'll control shifting. seriously, what do you consider as "work"? i'm not telling you to do 30 push-ups everyday. (i'm not being sarcastic btw, i love loa. but some of y'all doesn't like to see anything out of assumption-core. this isn't progressive and if my opinions are shaking the foundation of your assumption, sorry but maybe it's not much of an assumption because it shouldn't matter even the whole world is against you when it comes to loa -sandor goddard). whatever get on the ship loa gang, we are sailing

why "tried it all" shifters couldn't complete their wiring process then?

so i remember a person in my dm saying "i've tried a particular method for long period of time. i've tried it all and gave time."

i picture a student when i see "tried it all" shifters. this student thinks if they study math and score high marks in exams they'll be a perfect student. so they start working hard, ignoring the fact they hate math or find it hard to understand.

maybe they're interested in sports or literature but this student is obsessed with having perfect student image. they are not actively wiring, they are bargaining which only slows down and takes extra effort even to reach a milestone. they'll still have hard time to wire their brain even in subjects they do like. they study for 9 hours straight but the friend of them sniffs the textbook and scores higher.

then we have to let go of desire? it depends, i think there are two kinds of desire: first, a desire that helps you, reminds you of what you want to have and the second, desire that reminds you, what's lack. if your desire feels like a liability or its leeching you it's the second one. atp what your desire is unimportant. it's about how you see this unaccomplished desire.

plus if you are actively wiring your brain, you won't even have time to think about this desire obsessively. because you are too focused on what to do, desire is just a fuel and collectively helping you.

so people whose shifted in first attempt didn't wire any shit?

when you bumped into a "i shifted in my first attempt" person next rime, know that they are not shifting gods or prophets. they just figured out in instant what makes their brain easier to wire for controlling shifts. let's be fr some people are gifted with focusing or visualizing. they have useful existing wiring paths for shifting. plus i want to remind you something:

don't underestimate the power of a blank page. neutrality has higher frequency than courage, do you know why? because you don't have any fears or worries, when you are neutral you don't need a reason be courageous. i know if i erease your shifting attempts from your memory right now, you'd be shifting in your "first" attempt either. because most of the time you deal with your fears and worries instead of actively wiring.

how to actively wire?

people are trembling, throwing up and procrastinating when it comes to "attempt". i don't even want to call it attempt because you are actively learning. and no it's not "dw we learn from every attempt 🌺🌻✨" kinda motivation, it's literally how your brain is getting wired.

let's assume you find your wiring path, it's more prominent than other paths you have. for example its raven method + visualizing and falling asleep. you felt close to shifting with this method before. be aware of your every attempt and observe closely because by the time you'll get better at each part of your method. active wiring is not doing the same thing everyday robotically.

maybe normally you count to 100 but one day you feel you are already focused when you reached 40. or your focusing skills improved so much, you need to discard counting part, because you already wired that part in your brain. or you were visualizing yourself in your dr bed but suddenly you felt like you want to visualize one of your dr memories. your brain will be more invested in something they find interested. in previous student example i gave you, bargaining person misses these moments, they stubbornly do the same thing and rarely progress.

don't be scared of working on your wiring path. if you feel like you are waiting or pending, your wiring only slowed down. it doesn't always mean you need to do something, maybe you need to observe what you are doing and make simple changes. even if it means taking a break.

active wiring is not waiting for the day you'll achieve it. when you are learning a new skill you do your thing and expect it to be successful every single time even if it's your first time. you can almost see yourself achieving it. this expectation doesn't come from bargaining tho, it's your desire, the healthy kind.

in next posts i'll be sharing my way to wire my brain to control shifting and the terms i came up with. this is how i observed and decided to use wiring for myself. please take care and don't consume everything you read if it feels wrong or doesn't sit with you, or you don't even want to accept it true. spit it out. same for this post.

[thefirstknife]

sorry if this is an obvious question. but I've seen lots of people theorising that "The Conductor" is maya. Why are people saying this? I don't really know much of her lore or the stuff surrounding her (veil etc.) so any sort of explanation or lore on maya would be nice.

No problem! Honestly the whole thing with Maya started last year when they did a lot of extra little bits and pieces about her throughout Lightfall. Maya Sundaresh was one of the Ishtar Collective scientists from the Golden Age and heavily involved with various science, a lot of it connected to the Vex.

Probably the most relevant is the Vex simulations of Ishtar scientists; the Vex simulated 227 copies of Maya, her wife Chioma Esi and two others (Dr. Shim and Duane-McNiadh). The group decided to let the copies free into the Vex network to explore and see what happens. We didn't really know anything about this until Season of Undying (Shadowkeep) when the lore book Aspect released which details a lot about what the copies were doing there and then their plans to escape, with the help of Praedyth. We never found out if they made it out.

In Season of the Wish, last season before TFS, there was the exotic mission Starcrossed which ended with a secret room inside a Vex Citadel that appeared out of nowhere in the Black Garden. Inside that room, we found the symbol of the Ishtar Collective. The running theory is that this shows that the copies have finally escaped or there's some other connection to the whole story of the Ishtar team and the Vex shenanigans they've been through. My post about some extra details in regards to the whole Vex stuff during Wish. We initially also speculated about a possibility that there would be Venus stuff in Echoes, as well as possibly Nessus (or even Mercury or Io); turns out it was Nessus!

Anyway, this stuff with Ishtar and the Vex is a pretty direct link to the fact that Maya could have some influence and connections with the Vex. But why Maya specifically? This is where we go to Lightfall stuff and primarily the Veil Logs. In the Veil Logs, Chioma revealed that Maya was affected by the Veil quite a lot and more or less went mad experimenting with it. In her experiments, she constructed the whole thing to work like an "orchestra" with a "conductor." That word is the biggest clue honestly!

It was further also noted by Osiris when he analysed it all that this all seems similar to what the Witness' species did; some sort of a ritual with a "chorus" and a "conductor." This is also interesting because a lot of what's going on this season is showing us the Vex with references to music and specifically a "chorus:" they're called "choral" Vex. My post about these music references (there's been more since writing this). In one of the Veil Logs towards the end, Chioma explained that she one day found Maya dead in the "conductor's chair." Maya has been connecting to the Veil as a conductor for a very long time and did a lot of experiments with it, primarily attempting to "fabricate consciousness." She succeeded in this by creating Lakshmi-2: she used a dead Exo to essentially fuse minds into it and create something new.

One more of the Veil Logs also mentions that someone called "MSund12" was trying to access them in present time. This is Maya's 12th copy from the network. I went into this in the linked post; MSund12 accessed the OXA through the Vex systems at some point. This is interesting because this was brought up again in TFS in one of the Lost Ghosts quest which also name drops Maya Sundaresh directly and confirms that there are interferences from her going on here.

This set of exotics from the season pass with lore tabs also seems to be giving out hints that it's Maya. It requires some assumptions to be made but Maya fits pretty much all of it really nicely. There are also a lot of little curious details in the activity Enigma Protocol. After each section cleared when you get to the chest, there's three Vex confluxes which can be scanned. They reveal "queries," as if someone is using the Vex network to go through information and data on stuff. It's mostly related to very small personal stuff, Golden Age information, the Collapse and current stuff about the City or Lightbearers: as if someone is trying to connect to their personal things and learn about what the world is like now. For example, one of the queries is "port wine" - this was once mentioned by Chioma in one of the Veil Logs; she opened a bottle of port for her date with Maya.

With all of this combined, there's very little room for the Conductor to be anyone other than Maya, who is now able to control the Vex with those collars. We just don't know which Maya. Is it one of her copies? Is it multiple copies combined into something else? Is there anything of the real Maya in there? It would be interesting if it's just copies because then her teasing Saint as being a copy would be a neat reflection of her own insecurities. Either way, we'll have to wait a bit to find out about the details, but there's no doubt that all of this is setup for the reveal that it's Maya.