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ballad-of-birdy-lamb · 1 year ago

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hi!! i thought i'd send in a request for lucy gray baird! i was thinking maybe hurt/comfort set in the arena, where reader gets injured and either lucy helps them or has to leave them alone for a bit for whatever reason? gn reader preferred but i don't mind too much!

can't wait to read your writing in the future! no pressure to write this specifically though, of course <3

— @aubeystawby

I'm so excited to write about Lucy Gray, she is such a cool character. And thank you for reposting my requirements list! Also, I'm sorry if she's OOC, I've never written for her and haven't read the book in a couple of months.

Lucy Gray Baird x Gender neutral! Reader (hurt/comfort)

Warning: mention of murder, blood, description of wounds, spoilers for The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes, and hand-holding!

Keep in mind: the story can be taken in a platonic or romantic way. There are no kissing or romantic gestures but the way it is written can be taken either way.

Gliding one hand along the arena wall, you covered your eyes from the sun. The sun beamed down onto your skin, bathing you in warmth, but it wasn't pleasant. The midsummer heat and the humidity in the arena made it unbearable. It felt disgusting being in the sun from how little you had eaten in the past couple of hours.

When was the last time you had eaten a full meal? Maybe the night before reaping day. You couldn't have eaten anything the actual day from nerves. Your mentor barely gave you food from the days in the monkey house. The closest semblance of food you had received was from Capital citizens, which was minute and didn't help your appetite. You just had to hope your mentor pitied you enough to feed you now.

Hunger pains washed over your body, climbing through your body in waves. You wrapped your arms around your stomach, hoping the pains wouldn't last as long as the last time. Your prayers weren't answered, rather, the pains lasted nearly twice as long. Loud and deep breaths were heard coming from you as you keeled over.

When the hunger pains had left, you glanced around the dirt-covered arena, wanting to find any semblance of food. Perhaps another tribute willing to trade food for something. But what would you give? The only thing you had was a roll of bandages and a small knife. You could always threaten them. But it probably wouldn't have worked, the other tributes presumably had more than you. No point in that option.

You reminded yourself to stay focused, being in your head was not somewhere you wanted to be, especially in this place.

Your eyes glide over the surrounding area. The walls looked the same, a beige and dirty tone, it seemed to suck life from the already lifeless building. But the vibrancy of the six flags of Panem hung on the walls brought it back. Or rather five flags. One was gone and laid over several bodies in a large area of the arena.

Reaper’s graveyard. It brought a sense of disgust to you. The idea that they will always have Panem over them, even in death, made you pity them.

You didn't feel to count the bodies, rather, your eyes were drawn to a body in a small corner of the arena. It was a male tribute's body, several water bottles lay next to his body. You gave up discerning the identity of the tribute at the sight of a handkerchief over its face.

Buzzing sounds filled the silence as you looked up at a drone slowly flying toward you. It held a bread roll in its metal claw. A grin crossed your face as you reached your hand for the drone. At the sight of the bread in its metal hand, your mouth watered. Thank god your mentor had mercy on you. You held your hand out before it dropped the roll into your hand. It left as quickly as it had come but you didn't pay any mind to it.

You were swift as you took large bites out of brown bread. The stale, crumbly bread fell apart in your mouth but you kept eating. It didn't matter that the food wasn't the greatest, it was good you were even given food at all. Your fingers tore the bread apart rapidly. The feeling of hunger made the bread taste twice as good.

You were barely three-quarters through the bread when the small sound of metal hitting concrete filled the air. Your body stiffened. Silence filled the emptiness as you looked around quickly.

Your eyes trailed over the walls of the arena, then to the tunnel entrances. Your grasp on your knife tightened as you listened for anything else.

You were expecting one of the tributes to come running at you with a blade or an axe. Hell, you were expecting Reaper.

But the idea of someone getting their hand on a trident wasn't something that crossed your mind.

Heavy footsteps overtook the quiet and they grew closer. You didn't take a chance to look at who was running after you as you run for the channel entrance. A boy's voice yelled for another tribute, the boy calling for Coral. It must have been Mizzen. He was the only tribute that was allied with the girl tribute. And he was the only other tribute with a trident.

It took barely a second for the trident to be thrown through the air and hit your leg. Your body hit the ground roughly as you cried out. Pain flowed through your body as you reached back for the weapon. You peek at the boy running for you, and you were correct. It was Mizzen. You pull the trident from your leg harshly.

The pain grew worse as the air touched delicately at your bleeding wound. You got up and threw the weapon in another direction. It wouldn't be smart to take the trident with you. The situation was already bad but it would be worse being hunted for taking someone's stuff.

The trident hit the dirt-covered ground loudly. Mizzen was quick to rush for the skewer. It gave you little time to run since it seemed he wasn't willing to leave you alive.

Your footsteps were heavy as you dash through the flickering tunnels. Reaching down to hold your wound, you turned corners swiftly and continued running.

Agony crept up your leg and sprouted in your nerves as you ran from the boy. Mizzen’s shouts filled the flickering channel as you rush past corners. It took everything in you not to scream and wail from pain.

Hot pain wafted through your body as you limped through the tunnels. You took swift turns around the corners, wanting to get rid of your attacker. Heavy gasps left your lungs, not only from running but also from agony in your leg.

The lights shine down onto your blood-covered limb. Your face contorted in agony as you held your leg with one hand. Mizzen’s footsteps slowly quieted as you ran deeper into the dark tunnels.

When you were sure Mizzen and Coral had given up their chase, you finally stop running and slow to a walk, a slow and painful walk. You ground your teeth as you took in deep breaths. Think happy thoughts, think happy thoughts. You reminded yourself.

You ultimately looked down at your wound, taking in the damage done to your limb. It was far more disgusting than you had thought. Blood ran down your leg, soaking your socks in reddish-pink tones. The trident had torn the muscles in your leg and putting any pressure proved painful.

Blood ran down your ankle and gradually covered the dark cement floor. Your breathing was heavy as you tried to unroll the gauze from your pocket. Tears cascade down your face as you hurriedly wipe dust and dirt from your wound, pain welling from the scratchiness of your clothes and the dirt.

You take deep breaths, trying to think happy thoughts so you can continue. You knew you couldn't be in the same spot for long. Another tribute would find you fast, and they wouldn't have mercy on you.

You looked at the remnants of the bread roll in your hand. The deep brown crust had become maroon from the blood it soaked up. Its insides were a pinkish hue. You cursed to yourself and threw the bread angrily at the wall, it hit with a soft ‘splat’.

You rigidly reached back into your pocket, withdrawing a small hunter's knife. Reaching for a piece of clothing, you cut at the fabric quickly. Threads came undone as you slash hastily but it didn't matter. You needed to make a tourniquet.

The soft clicking could barely be made clear. The tapping of shoes. Looking around the dingy hall, you're quick to grab your knife. Your breath is rigid as you give your best effort to stand. The pain in your leg seemed to claw at your body and nerves. You whined in pain but kept standing. Your good leg held most of your balance, while you kept your free hand against the curved wall. Your exhalation came as a pant.

You glared at the figure, guiding your knife to the woman in the dark. “Stay back!” You screeched, jutting the knife at the girl. She held her hands up, as though she was getting caught for something. You were still on guard when you started to piece together who the girl was. Her dress was vibrant, contrasting her tan skin. Oh, you knew who this was.

Lucy Gray.

It was obvious the arena warmth and stress had affected her. Her dark hair was tangled, and her forehead was sweaty, though her dress stayed vivid. You were slightly surprised she hadn't been killed yet, her dress could have given her away. But it must have been her sneakiness that kept her alive.

Even if she was a nice person, you knew not to back down. No matter how nice she was, you knew her survival was always number one for her. No matter how sweetly she spoke, you didn't want to look away from her out of worry she would attack.

Lucy Gray stepped into the light, showing herself fully. There were no noticeable weapons on her. The only thing pointing out that she had something on her would be one side of her rainbow ruffles hanging lower than the other. Something was in her pocket.

“(Y/n), I know how scared you must be. I saw your interaction with Mizzen, it didn't look too pretty,” Lucy Gray spoke, acknowledging the gaping wound on your leg with worry. “Yeah, no shit,” You retort, keeping a hard expression as you exhale through your teeth.

“I can help you, I have water to clean your wound. Plus, I want you to be my ally for the rest of the Games. I lost my District partner and you're just as alone as I am,” Lucy Gray seemed saddened at the mention of her District partner. Wasn't it Jessup? You couldn't remember properly. You stared daggers into her wordlessly. The only sound that could be heard was your loud breathing.

Your brain gradually shifted from her hurting you to the idea of partnering with her. Lucy Gray was popular in the Capital, everyone knew that. Partnering with her would have a lot of benefits since she has a lot of sponsors. Which meant food, lots of it.

Blood dripped onto the floor in large droplets, but you didn't pay attention to it. The only thing you were worried about was Lucy Gray. “(Y/n), if you don't let me help you, you're gonna bleed out,” she muttered and took a step closer. At the small action, you slashed at the air in front of her. You blinked lazily. Your breathing grew staggered as you slowly became lightheaded. You swallow thickly as you fall over onto the hard concrete.

Your body hits the ground with a thud. Silence follows as Lucy Gray peered down at you. She is quick to get closer, reaching into her rainbow ruffles to grab something. As you recover sluggishly, you immediately swing your knife at the closeness between you and the girl. Seeing her reach into her pocket, you sliced at the air near her with more intent.

You pointed the knife at Lucy Gray, giving her an angry yet weak stare. “Get away! Stay back!” You exclaimed as you used your free hand to trudge your body along the dirt floor. The dirt gradually covered your clothes as you tried to move away from the girl. You groan as the skin near your cut got dragged along the cement flooring. Tears ran down your face from the pain but you kept going. Pushing yourself farther from Lucy Gray, even if it was only a couple of inches.

Your body grew weak as the soreness in your body grew. Lucy Gray watched you closely, acting as though you were a hurt animal. You used your free hand to wipe the tears

Yet, she didn't try to hurt you. She simply gave you a saddened look as she tried stepping closer. “I'm not going to hurt you,” Lucy Gray spoke in a soft tone.

“How... How should I know you won't?” You bellow, your words coming out slowly from the pain of your wound.

Lucy Gray expressed her tenderness with a slight smile. She calmly reached into the ruffles of her rainbow dress. Your eyes stay fixed on Lucy Gray, the knife never pointing away from her. She didn't mind the knife and your angry gaze. She must have understood your fear, this was the Hunger Games after all, and you couldn't trust anyone. She finally pulled her hand out of the ruffles, attaining a clear bottle of water and a dark compact. She shook her colorful skirt, hoping to prove she had nothing else.

“I don't have anything else, see?” Lucy Gray smiled graciously, putting the compact back in her pocket. Her movements were slow and steady. She kneeled, laying the clear bottle on its side, and rolled it to you.

You eye the bottle and Lucy Gray, looking between the two swiftly. Your body grew weak as your arm holding the blade faltered. “(Y/n), I don't plan on hurting you. I know you don't trust me and I respect that, this isn't the place to trust anyone,” Lucy Gray took a step closer.

The lights in the tunnels flickered as you gaze up at her. Each second gave the impression of hours. Each time you blinked, it felt like a day. You lowered the blade bit by bit until it rested at your side. You placed yourself against the wall and grabbed the water bottle, acting as though you were reluctant. Lucy Gray looked pleased by you wordlessly accepting her offer, so she sat down next to you.

Some part of you wanted to push her away, maybe even point the knife at her but you were too weak. Instead, you held the bottle to Lucy Gray, letting her take it from you. She took it from you carefully, as though the small action of taking it too fast would hurt you.

You kept your focus on her, even if your vision was dazed and a bit blurry. The girl poured water onto her dirt-covered fingers, washing the soot off before turning the bottle to your wound. You braced yourself as you felt the lukewarm water run against your injury. Waves of discomfort washed through your body but you didn't try to stop Lucy Gray from helping you.

Her touch was gentle, her fingers caressing the skin around the bloody injury. The blood stains on her fingers greatly contrasted with her tan skin.

Every touch on the sensitive skin and flesh was painful. Lucy Gray was careful, her touch was only uncomfortable. She took the knife from your grasp and brought it to finish cutting the clothing you had started. But she didn't use it immediately. She set the cloth onto her vibrantly covered lap, reaching for the roll of bandages.

You were somewhat faster to grab the knife from her, not wanting her to change her mind about helping you. Light glinted off the dirty blade, shining a small light onto the floor. It brought a small ounce of happiness to you. It was childish but it was nonetheless fun to move the reflected light. You twisted the handle and the reflected shine glided over the cement. Even if the blood loss was causing your change in mood, a smile crossed your lips as you moved it again.

Lucy Gray looked between taking care of your injury and at your complexion. The smile brought a small sense of comfort to her. Knowing that you were able to keep your mind off the wound, even if it was childlike, brought Lucy Gray a kind of reassurance. She didn't stress to take the blade from you too.

She instead focused on your leg. She wrapped the bandages tightly around the bloody wound, which caused you to wince. Lucy Gray shushed you calmly. “Take deep breaths, think happy thoughts,” she muttered as she kept up with her care. You nodded. Instead of going back to distracting yourself, you took in the details of her corset.

It was beautiful, the corsets design drew you in. Two snakes tied as a bow, a beautiful primrose in the center, and katniss flowers painted around it. A lovely primrose protected by katniss, ain't that sweet?

When your attention was led back to your leg, Lucy Gray had already finished. Your leg was covered in stained bandages, your thigh tightly wrapped with a tourniquet made from a part of your clothes.

Lucy Gray held the bottle of water to your mouth. You didn't reach for it but accepted her help with drinking from it. There was little left for you but you needed it, your mouth dry from drinking nothing for days.

When the bottle was finished, Lucy Gray smiled and set it to the side. She took your hand and encouraged you to move when she wanted you to. Lucy Gray wanted to move you like a puppet but you obliged. Her hands moved to your shoulder then your back, pulling you gently to face away from her.

The small action made you worry but you were too weak to ask her what she was doing. But your thoughts were answered fast when Lucy Gray pulled your head into her lap. The rainbow ruffles that decorated her skirt tickled the back of your neck.

You could feel Lucy Gray holding you close, yet her arms loose. You watched her as she smiled down at you, your head in her lap. The lively shades of red and purple made you feel as though you were in a flower bed. Lucy Gray’s voice came out quietly, it seemed she still thought you were weak. You were but you wouldn't admit that to her.

“I can get us food when we go into the arena again, but not now. I want you to rest, ok?” Lucy Gray said softly. Her hands were gentle as she touched you, her fingers gliding over your skin.

Your eyes fluttered as you stared up from her lap. The want to show that you didn't want to rest was prevalent in your head, you knew it couldn't be seen on your face. You wanted to grab your knife and force her to take you to get food but you realize it was a bad idea. Lucy Gray has the power in this situation. She could kill you if she wanted.

Your thoughts came to a stop as Lucy Gray started to sing, murmuring the words. The words were difficult for you to hear but it nonetheless brought comfort. She kept your head propped up on her lap. Her fingers traced an indiscernible pattern on the back of your hand. It was calming. And Lucy Gray was so sweet. As you had thought before, she could have murdered you with your weak stare, yet she took care of you.

Lucy Gray kept serenading you in a soft voice. The sound of her voice didn't carry far, it only carried to you and her. Lucy Gray sang for comfort, not only for you but for herself. Lucy Gray’s fear and stress were distinct. Her voice was slightly shaky and so were her hands. They kept grazing your skin, trailing her fingers along your arm. At her evident stress, you shifted your hand to intertwine with hers.

Lucy Gray’s voice somewhat faltered, not expecting your touch. But she didn't pull her hand away. She squeezed your hand and continued to sing. Her voice is stronger now.

Each touch comforted you, it almost made you feel like you were in an entirely different place. You weren't in the arena, you were in her comforting arms. You didn't feel the pain in your legs or the fear of the other tributes. You only felt Lucy Gray’s warmth.

Your eyes fluttered shut as the hymn made your fatigue grow. Your body loosened in Lucy Gray’s arms. She kept you close as the song she sang ended but continued to another. She belted out the tune with sympathy and kindness. Her voice brought so much comfort, the meaning of the song wouldn't have mattered to you. Lucy Gray could have sung about murdering people but it still would have carried a sweetness.

Exhaust filled your body but Lucy Gray spoke again.

“Good night, (Y/n). Sleep well,” Lucy Gray’s voice whispered with the evident sound of a smile. The words conveyed something to your mind, permission to sleep. Her words gave you acceptance to be weak (or weaker than before) with her.

And you finally slept. You slept in her arms, your head against her rainbow ruffles. You imagined you were in a field of beautiful flowers, rainbow flowers. Some part of you hoped that is where you would be when the Games are over.

Feel free to request any TBOSAS content if you liked this!

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ato-catto · 2 years ago

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omg hiiiii. could i request a trunks x reader where it’s inspired by the song “dark red” by steve lacy? for some reason it seems so fitting. THANK U SM I LOVE YOUR WRITING :D

Thankyou 😭 I wasn't sure which Trunks you wanted so I went with the hottest one- Future Trunks.

When Trunks looked at you he saw Hope. He saw what he was fighting for in this messed up version of his existence.

Trunks said a prayer at night. He didn't know to what god- if any- but he said a prayer begging whoever was out there that you looked at him the same way he looked at you.

Death was always around the corner for the two of you, a shadow looming in your wake of the Grim Reaper wielding a lengthy scythe. Sometimes, he saw the hope drain from your eyes when you became tired, and quiet.

He would give you a big smile and tell you to get back up and keep going, and assure you he was at your side.

But he wanted more than to just be at your side. He wanted to curl around your sleeping form at night and kiss your neck, hold your waist. He wanted YOU.

You sat beside him in the bunker, a little metal barrell infront of you both with burning paper licking out of the air holes. You both warmed your fingers and spoke about your journey, your survival so far.

His blue eyes flickered in the dull orange glow of the fire, as he watched your face as you spoke.

"Trunks-?" You frowned. He was totally lost in your eyes, just staring with an empty expression. When you said his name, he seemed to whir to life, blinking and glancing away.

"Sorry i-" he began, but he didn't have a good enough excuse. He had been wondering what it would be like to just.. kiss you.

"Are you alright?" You pressed, leaning forward to put your hand on his sympathetically. "You look a little lost there."

He glanced down at his enveloped hand- although it was barely enveloped because against his, your hands were almost pathetically small. It made him blush, and turn his hand over so he could link his fingers with yours.

"I was just thinking." He said, still looking at your entwined hands.

"About what?" You gave his hand a little squeeze. The tips of his fingers were cold against your knuckles.

He couldn't look you in the eye, for fear of giving his heart away too soon. "Us, mostly." His gently but gravelly voice seemed to waiver slightly, as he squeezed your hand back.

"Us?" Something in your chest moved heat to your cheeks. There was an 'us'?

"I.. I have feelings for you. Its kinda getting hard to ignore it." Trunks' eyes finally flicked up to meet yours. They were brimming with unspoken emotion, and his pupils seemed to widen once they fell upon you. Your heart kicked up, and started thrumming in your ears.

"What?" You couldn't quite believe your ears.

He sighed and closed his eyes, gathering whatever bravado confidence he may have inherited from his late father. "I'm in love with you."

You weren't sure what you said or how he moved so fast, but very suddenly, his arms were rapped around you, his familiar dusky smell surrounding your senses. He pressed his mouth to yours in a gentle, inexperienced kiss. Your hands came up to touch his hair, running your fingers through the coloured locks.

You had been too busy just surviving that you had forgotten to live. And you hadn't even noticed how much you loved Trunks.

How much you needed him.

#trunksxreader #future trunks #trunks #thanks for the request!#ato requests

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artsofmetamoor · 2 months ago

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ARE YOU KIDDING??! never apologize girl this is so AMAZING!! 😍😍😍❤️❤️❤️ I'm so honored that my drawing inspired you for this! It's so good thank you so much for writing it!! 🥰🥰

This seems like the start of an epic adventure already the way he arrives with a whole fleet to some new land! And your writing definitely shows Caleb's natural talent as a leader taking care of everyone, making sure everything is set to camp and even being the last one leaving the ship to check if everything is in order.

And just by his exchange of words with Drake, one can notice how much in sync he is with the men following him! The little details, like them discussing the arrangements of the shelter in the cave, makes the writing so much more immersive! Also I just love to read about the gang in a different scenario it's so cool ✨✨

And Caleb being like the Odysseus of Meridian once again! With his reputation preceding him as the man blessed by the Gods! And yet it's also clear he never really felt that comfortable being the "chosen one" in the way he attempts to playfully dismiss it while his talents are undeniable (even tho his inner lad also loves the praises 😆)

And you even managed to fit Diego here being so worried for Caleb's safety as usua! And understandable since the crazy cheesy man must have dragged them into the most insane adventures already while brushing the Grimm reaper many times, which drives poor Diego crazy! Especially in this scenario where his visions leave him so paranoid! The fact that he often makes back up plans for his visions really points out to this! Tho his interpretation of signs from the Gods is interesting especially when connected with certain special Gods he will meet as well 😆

But adventurous Caleb just can't help it and must go explore the area on his own hahaha oh interesting description of the bird of prey with the fish as a good omen! I wonder if that was also Dilla accompanying them or just some bird of the area 👀 I love the detail of Diego kissing the amulet as a prayer for Caleb and for his safety, it's so sweet ❤️ And him wishing he could see him in his vision just to make sure everything will be alright (tho maybe he would not like what he would see 😆). And Caleb is assuring him that someone is keeping an eye him as if he can feel his Goddess already hehe

Once again the little details are so interesting! The way he drinks from the squash and uses salt to clean his hands before his prayer! His sigh when hearing the thunder and realizing he must stay put for a while! This is such a great interpretation of the drawing girl, my idea for him camping on the open in the rain was so ambiguous, yet you manage to write a scenario that makes perfect sense for it and that's so awesome ✨✨ and somehow the detail that he doesn't mind the rain is charming! He finds it soothing even if he could get a cold sleeping like a cowboy 😆

Aww and here she comes!! Our wise Goddess 👀❤️❤️ And she's already so drawn to him since the very start! I love it how his spirit and kindness calls out to her so much! To be inspired like this and to be eager to learn from him must feel like something really special for an immortal being who lived so long and known so many! ❤️ And I really love how pure she is following her urge to protect him! To guard him even from simple rain! ❤️ And yet by her observation it's clear she finds this man so handsome as well 🤭❤️ I really like the idea of her eyes being her expression in her bird form, I tried portraying this as well! And gosh for a goddess to use her own body and cape to protect you from getting wet must feel like the biggest honor hehe

Oh my gosh girl!! The fact that you managed to fit my random short text into this 😭❤️❤️ I'm dead! ❤️❤️

Caleb's dialog as he wakes up and sees her is everything 😂❤️❤️ he couldn't help himself he just had to say it!! Probably didn't even notice he said it out loud because he was too sleepy and twitterpated at the same time! And Dilla's heart probably stopped for a moment before racing 🤣 Just like that the powerful immortal Goddess was captured just as much as she captured him! 😂❤️ Somewhere close Eros (or his equivalent in this universe) is VERY proud of himself, that was his best shot yet!! 😂

Aww and he actually asks her if she's dreaming he's too adorable and cheesy in EVERY universe! And her blush!! She can't take so many hits to the heart hahaha his hand on her cheek is already making her feel like flying higher than when she's a bird! ❤️

On the other hand Caleb doesn't want to leave, silly lover boy 😂 he will certainly make it his mission to see her again! The final note is great! It leaves it open with the possibility of what might happen next now that he's finally certain she's close to him! I wonder if he will tell this story to his comrades or keep it to himself!! They might think that sleeping in the rain made him a bit delirious with fever tho 😂

Thank you so much for making my day dear, this was wonderful 🥰🥰🥰🌹🌹 I'm compelled to make a short comic inspired by this now!! ✨✨

More Mythology AU✨ Caleb sleeps as Goddess Dilla (shifting between her bird and human form) shelters him from the rain. ❤️

As he stirs awake his eyes widen in wonder, captivated by the ethereal being before him. Without thinking his hand reaches out to touch her, desperate to know if she’s real.

In that tender, fleeting moment, Dilla's heart races. This mortal, with his simple gesture, awakens a feeling deep within her, something she has never known in her long, lonely existence.

#Guys read the previous reblog ☝️☝️ it's amazing ❤️❤️#mythology au #calebxdilla #caleb #dilla #diego #drake #chronicles of metamoor #collab with katerinaaqu #meridian #metamoor

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malevichism · 3 years ago

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Draga Ajna

It’s been 1 year, 8 months and 11 days since our brigade left Prijedor.

People don’t count the days in Sarajevo because every day is the same. What difference would it make? Putting a number on it would make them seem terribly long, or even worse; like counting the bulleted pimples that pollute our buildings. You'd be there forever.

But I do.

I’m not sure what hope means, if it means anything these days. And if I am one that carries the notion of ‘hope’ by numbering my days, I simply think of it as the ‘banality of hope’—survival.

But 1 year, 8 Months and 11 days ago, a little boy tugged on my sleeve, stuck a daffodil in my hand, and waved a scrap piece of paper in my face.

* * * *

We are situated in the eastern part of the city, where the lost souls of ancient books are taken by the breath of the reaper and bled back into the river. Back in Prijedor, my commander praised me for being good on my feet. An unfortunate skill in this neck of the woods. Sarajevo needed ground troops. Sarajevo had decided my fate.

A swarm of angry birds land on stone remains of the old wall that separates me from the Milijacka. They’re unruly, unrelenting and unforgiving for the fact that the only meal up for grabs in this city is a decomposing arm with maggot dressing. In its course, the Milijacka will carry the occasional corpse down its stream. Eventually, it will form a curve that travels in a south-easterly direction and trail on out of the city towards Pale, where our letters become Cyrillic. It is a triumph to leave Sarajevo. Every man and his wife's dream. Congratulations you’re safe! But you'll be too dead to see it.

There is a windless hollow in my chest where my heart used to be. If you look down, it’s lying at my feet, tethered to a ball and a chain. I've become accustomed to the sour, metallic stench of blood that pours out the eyes of windowless buildings. It suffocates me as though it were the first time. It's stone-cold hand takes me by the neck and wrings it like a wet cloth as I begin to read hope-filled words through tear-filled eyes. The only difference is, that they're not mine.

‘Draga Ajna’. Written in a childlike script.

‘How are you and you famili? Majka say that our countri become dangerus. No food and water. People are hungri.’ There is a pause broken by a scribble of a sad face and a tear that hangs too far from its dotted eye. ‘I miss you, Amina and you famili. I hope you are OK in Sarajevo. It is not good there. I hope you will write back soon. Your friend, Besim’. His letter is short, sweet and signed with a year-old Smurf sticker that ambers at the edges.

Cracks of sniper fire pierce through holes in the sky—pierce through the holes of unanswered questions in my mind. Slugs that feed the parasite of why?. The hair is standing still on my back. The hand that spares my throat leaves its mark as stiffness in the neck. My jaw had been clenched the whole time. It’s my cue to pick my sunken heart up from the floor. The dried up daffodil, still burning a hole in my pocket.

I am scared. Fearful of failure. Haunted by the echoes of childlike cries and childlike dreams. ‘Please, please take this to my friend in Sarajevo!’. More than anything, I am intimidated by the unwavering act of hope. The plea in his eyes, the urge of his word and the adamant tugging on my uniform, as though his world would surely crumble if I don’t answer his call.

I am the most important man in the world. I am the most important courier in the world. I am the God that he utters to at the end of his prayers.

Most of all, I am his emblem of hope. The eyes that he sees in his dreams, and the ones that I see in my nightmares. I'm on my hands and knees, begging Mr Mladić, 'don’t shoot the messenger!'. Repeating it between staggered breaths as I wave Besim's holy script before the man who plays God. As I look up, his beefy face melts away into the blackness of a cold sweat. My nightmare doesn't end in the morning. Because if the boys’ hope dies, it must die with me.

#Malevichism #DženanŠehić #bosnianwar #yugoslavianwars #yugoslav wars #sarajevo #sniperalley #writing #writing community #amwriting #untitled #entries

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kingudiamundo · 5 years ago

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Music Review 01 W.A.S.P. Sister Sadie, and the PMRC

Hey, my name is KinguDiamundo, you can call me whatever you want really, if there’s thing I enjoy it’s music. I’m passionate about it, and I want to share my passion with others, don’t get me wrong I am not the first person or the last or even the best, but ya know I just want to get better at writing and sharing my love for music. So today I have decided to post my fist song review/recommendation. Obviously there will be biases, this is my own interpretation of the song and that doesn’t mean it’s the correct interpretation, and I’m writing this on a whim so let’s just do this.

The fist song I would like to discuss is the 2004 W.A.S.P. classic Sister Sadie (And the Black Habbits.). Now most of you are probably wondering who the fuck is W.A.S.P. I understand and some of you are probably thinking wait you mean the guys behind Animal(f**k like a beast.) Yes that W.A.S.P.

A bit of a history lesson for those out of the loop in 1985 a group known as the PMRC was founded by four women concerned with the ever increasing depiction of explicit material in music. As the story goes Tipper Gore wife of Senator and later Vice President and presidential candidate Al Gore purchased the album Purple Rain and upon hearing the song Darling Nikki she became upset at the song’s sexual nature.(Ignoring the fact that it was an album to an R rated film and the lyrics were on the back.) She along with 3 other concerned mothers decided to form a group known as the Parents Music Resource Center (PMRC) they originally wanted a set warning labels to label specific content within music with different potentially offensive categories including S for Sexual, V for Violence, L for Language, D for Drugs and Alcohol use, and the strangest of all O for Occult. (This was mid Satanic Panic which will probably come up in other reviews.) They compiled a list of songs to specifically target as examples of the moral degradation of music the infamous Filthy Fifteen, safe to say the only time when a Cindy Lauper song is in the same list as a Venom song. https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLN2mqx4KJHLyYTHhD0K885u5iNJQci6vE I was able to find a YouTube playlist for the Filthy 15 if you want to checkout an important part of music history. One of those songs is W.A.S.P.’s cheesy 1984 glam metal classic Animal(Fuck like a Beast). It’s fun, catchy has a great hook and generally a song I listen too when working out.

Unfortunately a lot of people only focus on W.A.S.P.’s early career with the self titled album, Animal(Fuck like a Beast), and The Last Command. Which is good but admittedly trashy like McDonald’s chicken nuggets if you will. Not exactly a healthy or well balanced or super deep meal. However with the release of the 1989 album the Headless Children things start to change and the band begins to become more mature, but the big album that means a lot to me and is probably my favorite album is the 1992 classic concept album The Crimson Idol. An album I promise to review when the time comes. (When I have more experience.) But the song I want to talk about is off the 2004 concept album The Neon God: part 1 -The Rise, a story of an orphan boy named Jesse who’s mother abandoned him at the age of eight, and is now cared for at The Sisters of Mercy Boys Home This information is covered in the first three songs all of which are good on their own but with the song Sister Sadie it sets up the dark tone for the rest of the album. Now warning to those faint of heart you should probably just go now, mostly because of the depictions of sexual abuse in the song.

The song starts off as a slow burn with the guitar and drums and for a 7 minute song the lyrics don’t start till about a minute in, starting to build a sense of dread within the listener knowing that the energy is going to get intense. However this subverted with a more consistent drum track and guitar work that extends to the first two verses. Almost as if Jesse is trying his hardest not to let show that it affects almost as if that if he doesn’t acknowledge what’s happening he can live with it.

[Sister Sadie to Jesse]

Strip off your things

And bow to your queen

And cleanse the sins of your life

Get on your knees

Gonna beg and bleed

No one hears you - you belong to me

Reaper of your sorrow's seed

Black habits tonight

Your only sin

Was coming into Sadie's life

[Jesse to Sister Sadie]

Sister of No Mercy please

I'm praying to die

Can I cleanse my orphan sins

And save my soul tonight - when

But ultimately the pain will make Jesse desperate and the emotions are released wth the chorus and the music.

[Chorus]

I don't believe

In a God of love

I won't deceive

I don't conceive at all

I don't believe

In a God above

I don't believe

I won't receive no more

Desperation and fear are what are characterized by almost all of Jesse’s verses wanting the pain and suffering to end, praying for death begging and pleading for Sadie to stop so his sins may be cleansed. Eventually becoming almost hopeless when it comes to the chorus realizing his prayers are not being answered. Almost making it seem as though god condones what Sadie is doing, while as Sadie’s verses are either commands, justification, or taunts. The mos the most sickening verse for me is Sadie using her own abuse as an excuse to abuse Jesse. Which is a common example in the cycle of abuse.

[Sister Sadie to Jessie]

What I do to thee

Is what was done to me

Sins of the fathers lives

And do you feel

There's a God for real

Ooh your only God is me

[Jesse to Sister Sadie]

Reaper of my sorrow's seed

And my screams in the night

My only sin was coming into Sadie's life

Sister of No Mercy please

I'm praying to die

Can I cleanse my orphan sins

And save my soul tonight - when

[Chorus]

I don't believe

In a God of love

I won't deceive

I don't conceive at all

I don't believe

In a God above

I don't believe

I won't receive no more

[Chorus II]

I'm fucked for life

Blind and tied nobody sees

I'm fucked for life

I'm the child no mother needs

I'm fucked for life

The cries of night for all Sadie's needs

I'm fucked for life

I'm the child nobody sees

Jesse now begins to have feelings of worthlessness abandonment. Like he is invisible and underserving of attention which breeds anger and resentment justifiably, but his torment is not over.

[Sister Sadie to Jesse]

Oh you, I'll make you think you're dying

This room cleansing time again

I'll take you to this House of Sorrows

I'll break your Neon Heart of sin

After this verse it’s a minute and seven seconds guitar solo that express a torrent of emotion followed by chanting to gain the attention of the listener leading to the final verse.

[Jesse to Sister Sadie]

Oh are you mad

I'm going fast

Habits in black

No coming back

No Mercy me

This Hell is real

Why me ya see

She's here killing me

This is for the fist time Jesse begins to accept his persona as the Neon God as a way to get others to notice him so that he can never be used by Sadie or anyone like Sadie ever again and the songs ends on a repeat of the first chorus and the intro riff of the song to symbolize the cycle of abuse.

I genuinely think W.A.S.P. does not get enough credit for the genius of their work lyrics as well as the guitarmenship and genral catchy ness. Like this song is genuinely amazing and I wish more people would listen to W.A.S.P.’s later material.

https://youtu.be/JU17IwZz6Io

youtube

#w.a.s.p.#heavy metal #music review #pmrc

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fatalelity · 5 years ago

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DEAREST ADDISON, #1: 23 MAY

I hope that you are well when you see this. I wish for nothing more than your health, and your happiness. I hope that my passing leaves little pernicious influence, and I hope the next few letters would aid that process. Maybe this is a bad idea, but I know that there is nothing more that I can leave you than good memories, and a small pick me up every day that you may need it. I wish I had more time to be with you, truly.

This is the first of many letters, for as long as I can hold a pen to paper, I will be in here to remind you that you are as incredible as you are beautiful. I want you to also know how thankful I am for your devotion, for however long I can accept and for however long you may provide. These past few years with you have been nothing short of amazing.

I’m happy, finally.

There are constellations in your eyes, Addison Montgomery. I saw them again this morning when you drew the curtains to wake me up for breakfast. I hope that whoever you’re with sees them too. Thank them for me. I'm sorry I can’t take care of you anymore, but I hope you’ve found someone else who can. I hope that you forgive me for any hurt I may have caused in the meantime. I know how hard it is, my mother was like this too: in a fucked up way, I understand her now. I’m sorry if I ever embarrass you or yell at you. know that it doesn’t mean that I’ve stopped loving you.

Of course you’d know, I remember you slaving over genetics books for me. I remember how much love and adoration I held for you that night when you promised to just live life with me, without the disease in the backs of our minds. I hope that it still continues, beyond this time of writing. I never thought I would find you in this life. I am immeasurably lucky to have found you. I love you. See you in the next letter.

Forever yours, 13; Remy Hadley.

she’s known love and she’s lost love. the brunt of lost love and the devastation accompanied by it is no stranger to addison forbes montgomery. yet with each word etched onto the pages beneath her fingertips, the dull ache in her heart only grows with each passing moment that lingers above her. heavy is her soul that bears the weight of loss. perhaps she once did naively believe that any loss or grievance would be remedied by the fact that she’s known a great love and she’s lost a great love. after all, despite everything he’s put her through derek shepherd was still the best man she’s ever met. her eyes labour over each word, over and over again – as if she could hear her speak. as if she should vividly recall each moment remy hadley took to detail. fingers trace over the loops and strokes.

remy hadley is dead. otherwise she would’ve never seen this. otherwise, she would’ve not been in her room, opening this box that apparently she had kept from her all these years. gregory house was kind enough to give her a moment of silence, just her and remy’s words : the last words that were so meticulously crafted as if they were a cliche that was from a movie. as if the last words of any human being was supposed to be deeply profound and yet – she knows and was aware of her mortality. perhaps not at the same acute levels that remy felt it with each tremble, with each tremor, with each unrestrained anger that overcame her.

her lips tremble, her breath hitches. it had been an arduous journey, a journey of prayers to a deity she did not believe in, a journey of blind hope in an ex-husband who had hurt her beyond measures… and it was a journey of tumultuous emotions : the vacillation betwixt joys and sorrows – as if the grim reaper’s scythe was ready at any moment to rip her away from her arms. she is thankful that she is privileged to see her one last time. she is thankful that she could hold her hand and tell her she loves – no, loved her before she faded. and yet, it does not change the fact that grief washes over her.

grief comes in waves. the tightening of her chest, the breath she refuse to intake – her glassy eyes labouring over each words as if they are the curves of remy’s body that she could barely recall the shape of. it pains her to feel her already fading from the crevasses of her memory. she remembered when she could still memorize where each scar, each tattoo, each edge of her body was. when it rains, it pours. the grief laden emotions escapes the brims of her eyes. first, a drop slipping and sliding down her cheeks… then, it pours like a storm.

she loves her. she LOVES her. —– LOVED her.

tear stained eyes glance heavenwards, as if praying to the deity that she had long disavowed that they would let her see her, or perhaps, be in her presence… even if they are realms apart or whatever they preached in the churches. gingerly, she folds the letter and tucks it into the pocket by her heart – holding it close and dear to her. leaning her back against the walls, with her eyes closed, she could almost hear her calling out to her.

she could almost remembered the first time they met when she was just like this. tears stained, mascara streaking down her visage – a mourning of love lost. except, now she is truly alone. love isn’t lost, but rather, she lost a loved one. it is different. mark died, derek died… and now remy was gone.

she was truly alone.

#prxdigaldaughter #death tw /#hey you come into my house and attack me like this???#submission #* 𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐓 : drabbles #* 𝐑𝐄𝐋 : i wish we had more time ― addison & remy

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demonmary · 2 years ago

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ok here goes nothin also please ask me about any of these if they interest u at all <3 my faves are bolded <3

when we drive - real dirtybackroad stans know this one it was briefly posted as a first chapter but then I abandoned it and took it down while I rework it <3 it's rockstar dean is forced into hiring a chauffeur (cas). featuring way too much car information for a writer without their license. slowburn. cas has to drive dean and his various conquests around while they bang in the back seat. he's soooo oblivious to dean's flirting.

(s)he loves me au - tentatively titled lonely hearts club - dean and cas two person love triangle(ish) coworkers enemies to lovers while they're both in a secret relationship with a secret penpal <3

mechanic dean / artist cas au - they work across the street from each other idk it's probably just gonna be a oneshot I really like the beginning scene I wrote

you'll think of someone (cas pov ) - cas cannot get dean to see that he's so obviously trying to court him with handmade gifts and dean keeps being like. i am worth nothing . especially this beautiful thing you have created. mayhaps sam would like it. i am dirt.

I spend my days - college au , drunk dean flashing his ass out the window at what happens to be cas's dorm it's based on mooning from grease and nothing else

ghost cas au - I HAD posts about this on my old account. dean is hired to get a ghost to move the fuck on by a reaper with an otherwise perfect record. cas is a fully formed apparition who works in the antique shop that holds the item he's tied to and dean falls in love

uniformed - dean has a uniform kink and stole cas's car. initially cas was a sheriff but . i don't want to write about cops for the copaganda show so I might switch up the plot entirely or drop this one <3 regardless it was just gonna be a smut vehicle anyway maybe I'll drop it as a snippet or something

an untitled exploration of prayer and grace and the "cas feels longing" situation.

forcing forget - dean gets gay with cas and then immediately runs away and bangs a girl at a bar to prove he's still straight

hitman dean meets serial killer cas - they meet up over the body of the man they both want dead. it's fucked up it's dark it's cute dean meets a cat and cas adopts it . featuring dean asking siri the definition of hitman while on a stakeout

healing rituals - an exploration of dean and cas and grace and healing and gay

fanning the flame - chapter two of my waxplay-fic-with-no-waxplay that actually has the waxplay in it. it's a few months later, just established relationship smut lmao

we go together - also a previously posted dirtybackroad original lmao that has been taken down! grease au, high school. i just. don't like writing about high school students it gives me the ick I'm so sorry it's a me problem. i might completely rework it as an adult au because i like so much about it and it has dean and bobby bits and charlie is there and it has lovely relationship building stuff. i think it could be cute as adult love too but maybe i need to tackle my issues with writing completely g rated high school stuff lmao idk what my PROBLem is yes i do its trauma

undercovers chapter two - I've been thinking about coming back to this one and i had a little more written that i cut off to post it where i left it so . who knows.

dean spy au, fake dating for the bit but they fall in love. cas weird rich family ar(ms)t dealers

a poem about home that is actually basically finished and i need to edit and format and post

it's a ruff life - my destiel au that i love more than anything. actor dean, animal handler cas, miracle is the star of a movie franchise about a talking dog. claire is there and like. 11 and so cool. i really love this au but i need to work the plot out soooooooo hard so so so hard i just have vibes here

dean is in two casts and cannot shave his face and he's soooo scruffy and he hates it and cas has to help <3 gay <3

deanlee stanford era smokin weed blowin smoke rings

cas steals baby. dean goes rogue to get her back.

you'll think of someone (dean pov) - dean cannot be clear enough with his requests to ask cas out and cas keeps being like ! idk dean ! maybe a nice country girl would like to hold your hand!

barista dean and really predictable cas. dean shows his interest through nicer and nicer pastries. cas is on a schedule and does not notice these tiny gestures.

big ol armed cas - my baby i love u i love this one. it's just dean sweating over cas starting to wear different clothes around the bunker. cas borrows deans clothes. they go on a little breakfast date. cas has huge arms and dean wants to grab em and bite em

marytoni men of letters rewrite - mary joins the men of letters but consensually. no ketch because i hate him. toni and mary bang.

mark of cain cure rewrite - i'm stealing the lucifer tv show cure . it's gonna be great. featuring my biggest cas pov undertaking. a lot of world building. talk about angels and stuff in the little intro i have. then it's just. angry dean like a feral kitten hissing every time cas gets too close for something like 15 chapters

catholic school girl claire smoking weed and thinking about how she was literally an angel once that fucks a girl up doesnt it

evil marynatural. an exploration of the lucifer bloodline. what if azazel didn't wait to start getting sam his demon blood supplements and went right in from the beginning. pregnant mary demon blood addict. it's i'm its'. i'm . i'm sorry . i want more than anything to discuss this au. it's soooo dark and wonderful and horrible in my head.

anna takes the role of cupid to force mary and john into heavenlove. gay.

gay teenage mary and a genderweird girl she teaches how to shoot in the woods

annamary . poetic bullshit about falling angels and lobotomies and memory and grace and free will and choice and gay mary and angelf*ckin

i have. thirty active wips. i just put em all on a lil tracking list. thirty. active. wips.

#zo.txt

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dramayeoja · 6 years ago

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Goblin ❣︎ 도깨비

Kim Shin, an undefeated war general, is ultimately killed by a jealous young king named Wang Yeo. After death, Shin is revived by the gods—but his revival is by no means miraculous. He becomes a 도깨비 (dokkaebi, goblin), and is cursed. He will have to pay for all the lives he took in battle by living alone in immortality, witnessing everyone he's ever loved, die. Remaining lodged in his chest is the very sword that killed him. There is only person who can see that sword, and draw from his heart so that he can finally rest in peace: his bride... whom he's yet to meet.

Things get spoilery under the cut—you've been warned! ;)

Chipper, yeah? Haha so, right off the bat, the premises of Goblin remind me of like, a much more morbid version of the legend of King Arthur. You know, a man draws a sword from stone to prove himself the greatest king in all of Britain? Yeah. Just to be clear: this is a good thing (imo). Like, I personally think this is just such a cool idea for a drama 😍

Let's jump right in. I'm gonna be honest and say that, at first, I felt a little turned off at the female lead, Eun Tak, being nineteen (in the beginning of the show), meanwhile the male lead, Shin, is 900+ years old (but physically looks to be in his thirties). It just... rubbed me weird. But hey, the Twilight series (both the books and the movies) is exactly the same—high school girl, century-old man, bananas yet somehow romantic storyline... And I loved me some Twilight as a young adult. So I mean, I have no right to judge, really. Plus, Eun Tak soon turns twenty anyway. So that's an improvement I guess 🤷🏻‍♀️ We follow her character into her late twenties, nearly thirty. So things are definitely fine by then haha! 👍

Don't let that previous bit make you think I didn't enjoy Goblin—I LOVED it. That detail is just a lil funky to me, is all. Back during my Twilight obsession days, I was nearly twenty myself, and the thought of being pursued by an older man was exciting. Hell, I mean, it still is! But now that I'm two years shy of my 30th Birthday, I feel differently sometimes. I think, LAWD get that girl away from that man, she too young for him LOL. I am definitely getting old... Enough about Twilight now, apologies! I'm only using it for the sake of conveying similarities seen in Goblin 🙏 Let's talk cast!

Kim Go Eun as Ji Eun Tak and Gong Yoo as Kim Shin

Eun Tak is a bubbly young woman with limitless energy! While still in her mother's womb, Mama Ji was involved in a hit-and-run incident which, sadly, took her life. During Mama Ji's dying moments, she prayed to anyone above that her child's life be spared. Sat on a rooftop from afar, beer in hand (lol), Shin hears her prayers, as he is a god of sorts. He appears before Mama Ji, and shows mercy to her unborn baby. Eun Tak grows up with the ability to see/speak to ghosts. Said ghosts tell her constantly that she is the goblin's bride. How do they know? A strange birthmark on the back of Eun Tak's neck tips them off. Eun Tak unfortunately was taken in by her abusive bitch of an aunt, who jabs Eun Tak every chance she gets. Her cousins are assholes. Eun Tak's aunt really only keeps her around in hopes of collecting Mama Ji's savings (intended for Eun Tak) one day. Sad, right? I mean, isn't Eun Tak being born without her mother enough as it is? Life can be so cruel 😔

Lee Dong Wook as Grim Reaper/Reaper/Wang Yeo

This is Grim Reaper (or Reaper for short), portrayed by the handsome Lee Dong Wook. His character is just this strange, not at all tech-savvy man with a constant deadpan facial expression. Said facial expression provokes so many giggles during funny moments, and drives home the longing and desperation during sad times. We learn quite a ways in that he, in his previous life (again, just in case: spoiler), was Wang Yeo G A S P ! The young king that is essentially responsible for Shin's death, as well as all the misdeeds that were done to Shin's family. Again, this is something I don't want to spoil. Well, more, anyway 😆 You gotta see it!

Yoo In Na as Kim Sun/Sunny

Kim Sun, or simply, Sunny (she loves to spell her name for people lol, S-U-N-N-Y!) is the second female lead. Yoo In Na is so gorgeous that one look at her makes you feel like such a potato hahhah. 🥔 This fact about her beauty bleeds over into the show itself—every time another character meets Sunny, the camera does this slow motion pan into her lmao. She really is that pretty! Sunny's personality comes across so odd at first... Having watched all of the episodes now, I feel the intention of Goblin's creators was to make her seem like a soul searching for something it has lost in a previous life. idk if that makes sense, but yeah. She has this way about her, like she's disconnected from others, and is sifting through the haziness to find this thing she feels she's lost.

Yook Sungjae (my BtoB bias 😍) as Yoo Deok Hwa

Sungjaeeee ahhhh 💘💘💘 I had to gush, sorry! Hehe. Meet Deok Hwa: unofficial nephew of Shin. Deok Hwa is a third-generation chaebol (heir to a family-owned corporation) and spoiled man-child, always seeking his credit card hahaha 🤣 But I love him so much. Between Gong Yoo, Lee Dong Wook, and BtoB Sungjae? Man, I'm dying over here! Deok Hwa's true identity is revealed later in the show, which if you haven't seen it yet, I won't spoil it. Just watch. But his ending sucked. Like where did he go? Everyone else's endings got tied up neatly except for his. What gives, man? 🤔 Edit: I was actually reading an online conversation about what happened to Deok Hwa online—someone jokingly said he was reincarnated as BtoB Sungjae LOL 💯

Other various comments

AMAZING OST 😍😍😍

Good pace, episodes drag at times. A little confusing in the beginning, but you get there eventually. Maybe this is just me though, viewers who are a little more keen than I will likely catch on sooner ;) My mom was a little confused as well, and actually said at one point, "This should be called the 'what-the-hell-is-going-on' show," hahaha. Like I said though, we quickly moved on from this, and loved all the things. There are actually, I think, three (?) specials that were made to aid viewers in making sure they understand the complex events and relationships clearly. I haven't watched them yet, but want to!

Quite repetitive tbh, as there are unnecessary flashbacks often. Probably for two reasons: the obvious of reminding you what's what, but also to create suspense. Typical duration of most tvN dramas seems to be about 16 episodes, so it's possible these flashbacks and things are, for lack of a better word, filler. I don't know how rigid or lax tvN is about having a drama set at 16 eps, but I get the idea this is their preference. Seeing as so many of their programs on average last that long, I feel this must be what they want. Such has the potential to affect the writing, either positively or negatively.

A continuation of the previous bullet: I think Goblin's creators oversimplified the plot at times. I'm unsure if this is due to possible pressures to meet a specific requirement(s), or what. I'd rather forgo ALL restrictions and let creativity flow, let the story be told without pressure to fill a specific amount of time, etc. but TV production is weird. And contracts are weird. tvN might not to blame for these issues, could simply be that storytelling isn't always easy, man. I'm a writer myself, it's hard! I'M being redundant now lmfao! Anyway, yeah ~

Absolutely LOVED all the scenes that were filmed on location in beautiful Québec City, Canada 🍁 Tall, romantic trees, the fall foliage, historic buildings... sigh. Now all I need is Gong Yoo chasing me and we're all set! ;D

In addition to Shin being revived, my crush on Gong Yoo has been revived as well LOL. He fine 🔥 A classic K drama crush, can't go wrong with GY👌

Gong Yoo is always stellar at doing kiseu (kiss) scenes, and in Goblin, he does not disappoint. He really goes at it 🙈 which is preferred vs. the typical person kissing a stone statue that you see so often. He even did a lift kiss with Kim Go Eun that was reminiscent of THEE Coffee Prince kiss he did with actress Yoon Eun Hye! 😍

I never saw it coming, how the sword would wind up being removed from Shin's chest. I worried what the writers were going to do, how would they approach this, and just wow. The way things turned out is such a relief. It also told me that Shin's love for Eun Tak is true. I mean, I didn't need that scene to occur for me to know that, rather it just adds extra oomph that yes, Shin really does love Eun Tak. He didn't want her to suffer knowing she was responsible for his "death," so he thought quick and used her hands WITH his hands asdfghjkl. How dumb (bc noooo now you're gonna die) and amazing he is at the same time 💜

I love how Shin made his way back to Eun Tak after passing away, it was such a powerful scene. I could really feel his struggle, and kept yelling at my TV for him to stand up lol!

Devastated that Eun Tak died 😭 I really thought as many times as she'd cheated death before, she would somehow continue cheating death again and again for the rest of her days. But no... What a selfless person, Ji Eun Tak. Her being reincarnated as Park So Min gave me some closure. Not the closure I wanted, but closure.

The relationship between Shin and Reaper is ADORABLE. Whenever they interact with each other, they just have this great dialogue. Shin pings, Reaper pongs, Reaper pings, Shin pongs. It's great 😄 I still laugh about the slow-mo scene of them returning from the market with green onions HAHAHA 😂

I love Sunny & Reaper ~ However, their history as Kim Sun & Wang Yeo in their past lives is so very sad. I don't even know where to start RE: my feelings on this 💔 imo, their ending kinda sucked. I just wasn't satisfied with them having had this complicated, tragic story, only to be reincarnated in this fashion that I ultimately found to be just... idk, disappointing 😩 Again, closure, but not the closure I wanted.

I thought Reaper, the other grim reapers, the name cards, the depiction of what happens immediately following death with the brewing of the tea, the afterlife, etc. was all very creative. We really don't know what awaits us when our time comes—it's interesting to wonder if it's anything like it is in Goblin 🍵

Can't stop thinking about Goblin, even though I'm now watching Thirty but Seventeen & Mr. Sunshine! I'm emotionally cheating lol halp.

Photo credits: tvN & AsianWiki

Yo yo! I'm sorry I took so long to watch + write up this review! It's been a long couple of weeks for me, I wasn't always able to watch when I wanted. It was maddening 😆 But I have finally watched, and feel like the most accomplished person on the planet hahaha. xoxo 💜

#goblin #도깨비 #asian dramas #korean dramas #tvn

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motherfricker · 3 years ago

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I posted 663 times in 2021

224 posts created (34%)

439 posts reblogged (66%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 2.0 posts.

I added 467 tags in 2021

#nini - 96 posts

#writeblr - 54 posts

#kyles.writing - 50 posts

#writers on tumblr - 48 posts

#writing - 43 posts

#hero x villain - 42 posts

#my writing - 41 posts

#not my writing - 34 posts

#heroes and villains - 30 posts

#maits - 29 posts

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#i have problems wow anyways beautiful showstopping amazing fantastic never the same completely different unafraid to reference or not refere

My Top Posts in 2021

prompt number i don't fucking know so let's call this hero Mildly Flirting with villain enough to confuse the bastard shall we

The hero blinked once they felt the villain's fangs press against their jugular. "Are you gonna kill me? 'Cause this is kinda gay."

The villain took their lips off their neck. "What."

The hero shrugged. "I'm just saying. I know you're doing that to scare me or kill me, because, y'know—" jazz hands "—jugular veins. Am I right?"

The villain tilted their head. "Your point?"

"It's just that you know I said I found them intimate. And you're doing it to either kill me or scare me. But it's still intimate, you're still making my heart race, fangs or not."

The villain stared at them.

"You might as well just buy me a croissant, you know."

"You're an idiot."

82 notes • Posted 2021-04-07 17:58:14 GMT

prompt number ??? idk but hey we have a sexy hero here

"Is that a..." villain trailed off, staring wide-eyed at the new weapon hero was holding, "is that a fucking scythe?"

Hero grinned, eyes practically twinkling. They brandished their new weapon. "Sick, isn't it? Makes me look like the grim reaper, only I'm more badass."

Villain scoffed, leaning on their own weapon. "Don't you think it's a little too big for you?"

Hero hummed, and all of a sudden the handle of the scythe extended into something that resembled the clip of a gun. "It's pretty light, actually, despite having strong recoil." They braced the scythe behind them. They grinned even wider. "Speaking of recoil, check this out."

A gunshot sounded through the rooftop, and suddenly villain was pinned to the wall, wind knocked out of their lungs. Hero laughed, tilting their head. "Surprise!"

"You're the single most morally corrupt hero I've ever met," villain wheezed out.

"Aw, but I'm the most fun, wouldn't you agree?"

89 notes • Posted 2021-04-09 09:40:33 GMT

i hate you

—

note: first part here except uhh theyre both shorter than my lifespan so ?? this can be read as a standalone so that’s sexy

—

Hero didn't...they weren't expecting to hungrily kiss villan in the darkness of a walk-in closet like this just because they'd been dared to play seven minutes in heaven. But they were, and God, they wanted so much more. They clung onto villain like a prayer and they were a sinner, fingers tangling into their hair and lips molding together and into each other so smoothly and easily it was completely and utterly ridiculous.

It was when they had separated, gasping for air, that hero had realised they'd kissed more than once or twice, like how they'd agreed on. And they despised just how much they liked it. Wanted it to never end. They hated that kissing villain felt like they're uttered a forbidden prayer to save themself from damnation.

Damn villain. Damn them.

"I hate you." It came out too weak, too breathy, but villain still sneered back.

"I hate you, too."

And then they roughly pulled each other into another kiss.

They were still going by the time seven minutes were up.

92 notes • Posted 2021-04-05 13:05:50 GMT

prompt #7

"Love is blind."

"Not for me, though!" The hero pushed the villain into the rehabilitation center. "I would rather not have a serial killer as a partner. You stay safe though."

101 notes • Posted 2021-07-30 09:02:22 GMT

friends

It was a nice night. A pleasant wind flew through the crack of the open window, calming the hero with its chill. He could hear the muffled sounds of the party two floors down. The music coming from there was loud, but at least the walls were thick enough for it to not be too much of a nuisance. He leaned against the cushioned walls of the bay window, staring at his dark room in silence.

Hero didn't know what to call nights like these, when his sibling threw parties and almost her entire grade was invited when their parents went on another business trip. Hero had stopped participating months ago, not having enough energy, especially after fighting crime every other week—even during exam season. It was completely petty on the villain's part, honestly.

A sliver of golden light peeked into the room from the hall. Hero didn't really bother closing his door entirely; he was comfortable like this, he didn't want to get up. Just then, a shadow obstructed the light. Hero straightened up, propping himself on his hands on the cushioned seat of the bay window, knees pulling closer to his chest.

The door opened, revealing villain standing there in his civilian clothes. He was smiling, but it was nothing like the smiles he'd give hero when they'd throw debris and magic at each other, calling each other curses. It was just a gentle thing, like they were old friends meeting again.

They were old friends.

"Hey," villain greeted, still standing in the doorway.

"Hey." Hero didn't make a move to attack, nor did he feel the need to sneer. Needless, he still wanted to make sure villain wasn't dangerous. "Are you gonna bomb this place up?" He knew it sounded like a joke, but he was serious.

Villain let out a little laugh, looking at the ground for a brief moment. It wasn't vicious. Or rude. It felt different. Too different. He'd been different for a while now. They both had been. Or maybe hero was overthinking it. "No, your sister's too nice for me to do that. Can I come in?"

Hero nodded, humming. He watched villain close the door and make his way over to where hero was sitting. Hero pulled over a few pillows he'd previously moved to his side so villain could sit down. He didn't really know what to say for a moment, and he figured villain didn't either. A tense silence took over them.

"Why are you here?" hero asked, "not a party person?"

"Too tired for one." Hero huffed. Of course he was, they'd fought earlier that day. "Fighting you's a lot more exhausting than one would think."

Hero laughed involuntarily. He wasn't expecting villain to allude to them being being hero, even if he'd known for a long time. Fights when they were in their civilian identities was off-limits, and they'd maintained that deal for almost three years, after all. But hero didn't trust villain enough to let his guard down.

Nonetheless, he put his hand over villain's wrist. "Come here," he said, tugging. Villain gave him a puzzled look.

"Putting the moves on your sister's classmate?"

Hero didn't laugh on purpose. He tugged a little harder. "We're the same age."

"Then why am I a grade above you?" villain asked, following his pull, letting hero take his other wrist too. Hero leaned back and put his hands on villain's back, letting him rest on his chest.

Hero leaned his head against the cushioned wall, looking out the window. "Because you stole IQ points to jump up a grade. You barely passed math tests in third grade."

Villain snorted, adjusting himself so his arms wrapped around hero's torso, looking at the door. "Is that so? I just thought I was smarter than you."

"Roasts, he has."

Villain laughed, pressing his face closer to hero's chest. He didn't say anything else next. Hero didn't mind, hands going down villain's back, roaming around mindlessly.

"Are you gonna kill me?" hero asked out of the blue. He looked down at villain's head, catching the way he blinked a few times. "You can kill me. I'm healing from that wound you gave me. It's shallow, but you can kill me right now."

"Is that an invitation or a question?"

Hero huffed, finally letting a little smile take over his face as he looked at the window again. He played with some things in his hands. "A question. Are you gonna kill me?"

"No."

Hero looked at the wall. "Really?" He threw villain's switchblade. It penetrated the wall with a metallic sound. Villain perked his head up. Hero threw the other switchblade along with it, and it penetrated right next to the first one. Villain didn't say anything for a few moments, going still on top of hero.

"You—"

"You were gonna break the deal."

Villain stayed quiet. He slowly got off hero, letting him straighten up against the wall. He didn't make eye contact throughout the whole thing. Hero thought his stare was probably making him uncomfortable. He wasn't sure.

"I was going to. But you didn't have a weapon."

"You were expecting to fight a wounded person."

"You're capable."

Hero furrowed his eyebrows. He was capable, yes, but was that it?

"You're not..." Villain looked up, not quite meeting his eye. "We don't meet often. Nowadays. I didn't have someone to spend time with."

"So you tried to spend time by trying to kill me—"

"Fight," villain cut off. He looked a little guilty. "Trying to fight you."

Hero looked at the way villain's fingers fidgeted. Villain used to have a habit of wringing his hands whenever he felt guilty. Hero wondered if he still had the habit. Villain liked looking at the night sky and the streets, too. After he'd done something that made him feel guilty.

"Fight me," hero repeated, looking at the slightly ajar window opening beside him. He opened it all the way, having to lean over villain so the window didn't obstruct their view too much. "Why?"

"It's the only thing I know to do with you."

Hero swallowed down a wave of sadness. They used to do more than just fight. Before the unspoken hero-villain rivalry started. They'd look at the night sky sometimes. He didn't want fighting to be the only thing they knew how to do with each other when there was more than just that.

He put his hand over villain's, slipping his fingers under his palm. "Let's look at the street."

"You could kill me, too."

Hero stared at the lampposts dotting the street, lights shining onto the dark asphalt from hero's house. "You could too. I'm lighter. You can just swing me over the window."

Villain snorted. "I could, but I'd rather not inciminate myself. My fingerprints are here. People can act as witness to testify against me and say they saw me come up. The investigation can be over in just three days."

"Not unless you run away and steal someone's identity."

"Too much work."

"And yet robbing a bank isn't?"

A few moments passed. Villain and hero looked at each other. And then they laughed. Villain didn't sound malicious, and hero knew he himself was laughing genuinely. Villain rested his head against the window, grinning.

The laughter died down eventually. Hero and villain continued looking at each other, and villain's eyes seemed to twinkle in the night.

Hero felt stupid for what he was going to ask, but he didn't want to chicken out before it was too late. "Can I—"

"Can I kiss you?"

Hero's face felt warm. Villain had beaten him to it, huh? He nodded. It was stupid. Villain was probably going to swing him off the window. He didn't care much.

Villain looked a little hesitant. He moved closer, cupping hero's face gently. Hero wondered if he could feel how warm his face had gotten. Villain brought their faces closer, and hero hesitated on closing his eyes, but shut them when villain did. He felt their foreheads touch, and then warm breath on his lips. He felt his breath hitch and his throat go dry, and he felt silly for it. Their noses touched, and villain nudged them together.

Villain exhaled. "I think I'll give you two for tonight."

Hero opened his eyes, surprised, before villain placed a chaste kiss on the corner of his mouth before drawing back.

Hero swallowed. Was this a trick? "That's it?"

Villain smiled cheekily, but his eyes were warm. "Bunny kisses, love. That's what I meant"

Hero swallowed harder. Villain would call him darling, even if it was only in his villain identity. But never love. That was when they were close. Only when they were close.

"So you won't give me the other kiss?"

"You decide," villain said. He sat up, standing in front of hero. "During your sister's next party."

"Won't you get punished?"

Villain laughed. He scratched hero's scalp, looking at him gently. It made hero feel a little warm. "I'm retiring soon. Decided I'd rather be a normal 16 year old."

Hero widened his eyes briefly. Oh.

Villain dropped his hand. He walked out of the room, turning to look at hero one last time. Hero felt unbelievably giddy.

"Next week, love. Hopefully."

Next week.

Hero was a patient person. But that statement made him the most impatient he'd ever been.

146 notes • Posted 2021-04-05 11:56:01 GMT

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