#I'm worthless
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Yeah, officially convinced that I will never be able to get close with someone again. I get too wrapped up in my own head and my anxiety makes me spiral.
I don't deserve anything good. I just don't. I deserve all the bad things that life throws my way and I don't deserve happiness.
I'll always be too much for people and that's fine. It's fitting that I end up alone and miserable in life.
#probably better off fucking dead#no one wants me around#I'm worthless#i wish i would just die from some freak accident#jonah's ramblings
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Aren't we meant to have one good feature.
Smart or pretty or healthy or wealthy or funny or talented in some way.
Why do I have no good features.
How have I failed so hard at life.
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I was trying my best, giving my best.
And now I can't even try anything. I can't even wake up and get out of bed lol
#i was trying my best#i try#feelings#depressing shit#i can't get it out of my head#i can't wake up#i'm worthless#I'm exhausted#I'm tired#im pathetic#i tried#vent post#vent
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I just push everyone away.. I should've died a long time ago.
#push everyone away#personal#better off dead#depressed#i don't want to be here anymore#kill me#i wanna die#i don't wanna live anymore#i hate this#i wish everyone away#i'm worthless
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I'm such a terrible awful ugly disgusting person and this world is better without me in it, I'll always be a fucking monster.
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I don't think I can be selfless anymore
I think I need to die
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#maybe it's the depression speaking#but#i mean nothing#I'm worthless#it's like im transparent#i have no one bc it's like i don't even exist#I'm so scared ending up alone#but the people in my life don't respect my identity#and i don't know which is worse#i haven't eaten properly in weeks#I'm so burned outi can't even make me a sandwich#I'm not hungry either 90% of the time
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I saw a couple things today talking about knowing your worth.... I definitely do agree with it but they never talk about how some of us just aren't worth much. Some of us don't bring any value. Some of us don't have anything good to offer. I realized this years ago. My worth is way low. Too low for anyone else to want. Not wanted anywhere.
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we arent going to laugh, at least, everyone here that matters isnt. we care about you. im sorry that we couldn't overpower the soot-eaters, but once we lose hope, theres nothing left. dont give up, please :(? for me? -馃
YEAH! we're not haters, we love you! we don't know what the story would be without you! you're important!
#you're just saying that#once i finally believe youre going to punch me in the gut or something#there is no happy ending for me#nobody loves me#I'm worthless
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I wish ppl love black trans girls and women, I feel like no one loves me and I'm just an ugly abomination 馃槩馃槩
trans boys of color I love you all so much. You鈥檙e not a freak or an aggressive monster or a mistake. I鈥檓 so sorry you have to deal with so much bullshit from people in your communities but you鈥檙e perfect and whole and you鈥檙e gonna be just fine.
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Thoughts are troubled and full of doubts and awful feelings and I feel incapable of speaking them... I want my razors...
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I despise my lack of intelligence so damned much!! *punches a wall* I can't even properly colour in a picture someone else drew!! I hate being so utterly incompetent!!
#alex's thoughts#alex is incapable of doing anything correctly#i can't do anything right#i can鈥檛 do anything#i'm useless#i'm worthless#i hate myself#i have no intelligence#my brain is broken#my brain#is pathetic#i'm pathetic#i can't#do anything#draw#drawing#drawing a picture#colouring in a picture#colouring#incompetence
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Genuinely asking, does it get better? I'm almost 26 and it feels like my entire life has been spent wishing I was dead or never born... Just curious when that ends cuz I can't take it anymore I wanna die and release everyone in my life from the burden of knowing me... Just seems unfair to myself but everyone I know, you know? Like, if I just disappeared right now, everyone would be better off. Nobody would have to deal with me being so emotional and angry, how I say toxic shitty things all the time, how I'm lazy and stupid and just generally a drain... When do these feelings stop?? I want them to stop
#just kill me#I'm worthless#i ruin everything i touch#im garbage#my most toxic quality is that i wont kill myself#help me
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my new thing whenever an embarrassing memory jumps up out of some backwater neuron to t-bone my present-day thought process is to declare a statute of limitations. like i can burn down an entire building in the state where i live and the law deems it both unfair and illegal to prosecute me after six years have passed, i think that thing i said in high school can be expunged from my record.
#ohhhhh so twelve years ago i was really rude to someone at the mall and now i'm worthless forever? let's see it hold up in court#containment breach
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No one has ever checked on me when I disappeared. No one has ever given af if i disappeared or wasn't here or even noticed I was gone, no one thinks I'm beautiful inside or out, so why should my existence here matter at all why be surrounded by humans when humans just show me everyday how ugly we are anyway, why be here to make everything worse for everyone by being a burden when it never mattered anyway.
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馃ぁ
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