#I'm still very much a newbie at this ok

[etherati]

An au fic that is near and dear to my heart, and one that spawned hundreds of thousands of words of follow-up, companion pieces, aus, and so on. AKA the one where I fixed canon by turning a major character into a zombie.

Lot of firsts on this bind -- first time using a guillotine for the edges, first time including a bookmark, and first time using heat transfer vinyl, for the lettering and bloodstains on the cover. For a first attempt, not awful; the letters came out a little raggedy but I decided to just roll with it since this is, thematically, supposed to be a bloodied and ratty relic of an apocalypse. And I FUCKING LOVE how the blood splattered page edges turned out.

Technical details under the cut.

Body text is Kozuka Mincho Pro R on French fleece white parchtone; titles are Haettenschweiler; chapter headers are Traveling Typewriter; chapter caps and Tshirt text are You Murderer BB. Blood splatters from a font called simply "splatter".

End papers are some kind of scrapbook paper from a "blood splatter" pack I found online somewhere. Bookcloth is generic BbH. Vinyl is Siser Metal HTV, cut with cricut, that I jacked up by using an iron instead of a proper heat press. Edge splatter with mix of liquitex naphol red light and FW Pearlescent black acrylic inks.

I think that's everything. Most ambitious bind I've done and one of the ones I'm happiest with in terms of overall presentation.

[rheiple]

Attention Seeker

-OneShot

▪︎SUMMARY↦ Why is he following and helping you around with every chance he gets?

▪︎WARNING/s↦ None

▪︎CHARACTER/s↦ Eclipse, Reader

▪︎AUTHOR'S NOTE↦ Gago ang tagal ko nang hindi nagsusulat,, well anyways this the Eclipse wanting reader's attention, the first thing I needed to do at the poll.

I'm not really satisfied with the out come, but I wanted to post it not instead of letting it rot in my notes, and also I might not do the other fics I've planned at the poll, if i did write them then its gonna be for a long time

I've noticed that whenever i write, when I'm passionate about something I noticed that my writing looks good(?)

But when I force myself to write its basically shit, and this Fic is probably one of the few sjit fics I've written

So yea I hope you don't mind

“…It’s really dark in here.. Mind if you shine your eye lights over here bud?”

The sound of metal clinking represents the movement of your very tall and lanky companion.  With it’s big bright eyes, you’re able to be see the injured Helpy trying to move it’s way towards a vent.

Here in the storage room, it’s very hard to move and see with how many piled stuff are stored in this small room. You’re surprised that He managed to cramp himself inside here.

Eclipse, your ‘new' friend has been tagging along with you ever since your shift has started.

You don’t really know why- or maybe you do. Perhaps it’s because he’s still new with his surroundings in this Pizza Plex. Couldn’t really blame him, and it’s not like you mind his company anyways. You just found it a little strange.. and maybe cute.

You went to carry the small bear in your arms, you heard a little hiss coming from the taller one. You eyed him as you put Helpy on a table.

Noticing you making eye contact with him, he grinned from ear to ear, he lets out a creepy glitchy giggle. It’s like he’s drunk on something.

Honestly though, you want to have a taste with whatever he’s drunk with. It’d be a good stress reliever for at the moment. But oh well, no matter, you have at least 30 minutes until it’s your break time. You could pull this through.

Just like what you keep saying to yourself for the previous days.

Holding the hammer up high, you gave Helpy a little warning. Knowing he’s been given the ability to feel pain and all. It’s creepy and sad knowing this bot's cursed ability is used to train newbies. You also wondered how on earth are they able to program that.

“All right Helpy, I’m not gonna sugarcoat this and tell you it’s gonna hurt just a little. It’s actually gonna hurt really bad but I need you to be brave for me ok?”

He's shaking, but he nodded his head.

“…Ok, on the count of one… two…”

You aimed the hammer a little close to his knee.

“And…Three-"

Eclipse hold the back of the hammer.

“Wha- Eclipse? What’s wrong?”

He gently took the hammer out of your hand. His other hand softly patting your head.

And immediately slammed it on baby bear bear's knee.

“OH MY GOD!”

While Helpy screamed because of the sudden pain, you screamed in fright because of how loud and painful Helpy's scream is. Eclipse took care of the situation by putting some kind of mask that emits special smoke to calm him down, and put a bandaid on his knee.

His other hand went to give him a lollipop.

You only looked at him flabbergasted. And he only smiled at you.

“Work is over.. Break now..”

One of his hands took yours and led you to the cafeteria.

.

.

.

Well this is humiliating.

You ignore the stares of your co-workers, glaring at them if they ever so much as chuckled at your current predicament.

He held the spoon filled with fried rice and chicken, the lunch you packed for yourself and tried to feed you. He’s making you look like a baby god dammit! You glared right up at him and gently smacked away the spoon. “Eclipse, you’re kinda making me look like a fool here…”

The celestial robotic tilted its head, he slowly brought back the spoon close to your mouth. His other hand  holding your chin, trying to pry your mouth open. “…ahh”

You took a grip on his hand and lowered it down where he couldn’t reach your chin once again. He didn’t seem to mind, as he gladly took your hand and intertwined it with his slim fingers instead. He began to rub your hand with his thumb as best as he could.

With a sigh, you took the spoon and placed it on your lunch box. You look at Eclipse and hold his other hand. His rays slowly started moving at the initiated contact. “Look man..” You start off, letting out your thoughts and feelings was really hard for you. You’ve never thought you’d even do it to someone like Eclipse, considering he probably doesn’t know the most of what your saying unless you explained it but.. At least he had sympathy, you wouldn’t be able to find that in most people nowadays. That’s probably why you feel safe sharing your thoughts and feelings to him.

“Eclipse…You know I really really appreciate you helping me around stuff n all but. I kind of feel like you’re just… Babying me at this point.”

He emits a low mechanical whine, you could feel the slight tightness of his hands. “…Not intentional.. wanted to help you… get work done…”

“Awwe, thanks buddy.” You gently squeezed his hands and did the same thing Eclipse did with your hand earlier. “…But are you sure that’s the only reason? I noticed that.. You’ve been a little passive aggressive with the other bots.. Whenever I focus on them instead of you.”

With your confrontation, he looks to the side and whistled out some playful toons.

You confirmed that being rough with Helpy earlier was intentional on his part.

You let go of his hands to put yours on your hips. Giving him the all knowing stare, you called to him in a accusing manner. He only grinned widely at the mention of his name. You guessed that scaring a robot wouldn’t really work considering with looks alone, he’s the scary one than you.

“…Are you jealous?”

“…no..”

“You’re lying.”

“Not lying… only fibbing.”

You scratched your head and raised a brow. “But why? Why are you jealous?”

The tall robot leaned in to hug you. You went to sit on his lap. His faceplate rotated from left to right. “…love your eyes. Better on me.. than on them..”

You snickered and brought a hand up to your face. “Oh my god.. you wanted my attention?” You  seem to get the memo as he purred in delight at your question. “..Oh Eclipse.”

You pry yourself off to stand and look at him, cupping his face with your small hands. As expected he leaned in to your touch. “You didn’t have to go through all that way just to get my attention you know that?” Seriously, he really shouldn’t have.

He caused hell to the other bots, he’s scary when he’s jealous.

“If you wanted my attention, you could’ve just asked! You know I wouldn’t say no..”

He took a hold of your hand with his, and looked at you with bright purple eyes.

“May I… have your eyes on me?” You grinned and kissed his teeth. “Of course..”

He began to stand up, surprising you by picking you up. You didn’t know where your going, but you assumed in one of the dark places where no one could find you. You’re glad you play a vital role at your job, or else you would’ve been fired with the amount of time you’ve went missing during your working hours.

You didn’t noticed, but Eclipse surely did, of a certain robot hanging from the ceiling observing him with envy.

The moon themed animatronic crossed his arms. “…So this is what our star has been wasting their time on..”

‘No fair, no fair! Why spend time with a bootleg version of us?!'

It’s as if Eclipse heard their thoughts, one of his hands gave them the rude gesture from behind.

Moon clicked his tongue. “So…that’s how you want to play…”

He’s been playing unfair for the past few days! Always sabotaging their plans so he could have you in his arms! They tried so, so many times to get your attention. Like making so many messes in the Daycare for you to help them clean it, they made gifts so they could see your flustered face, and they even broke themselves for you to fix them.

Not only did the metal prick cleaned the Daycare, fixed them instead of you- which they much rather prefer,  he stole their gifts, lying to you that he was the one who made it instead of them! He is such a big fat liar! A phoney!!

He could imagine his Sunny counter part walking around and huffing in annoyance. ‘Oh the nerve of him to do that! When I get my hands on our star once again he’ll be begging us to let him see her! And even then it’d be over my shut downed body if he ever thought I’d agree!'

The lunar jester is pretty sure the Eclipse would just control their minds to scrap themselves up, before they could even think of hiding away their star.. As much as he wanted to, he and Sun knew it’d just make you sad if you found out they’re not on good terms.

So they’re the ones who tried to give them the time he needed with you but, they’re just abusing their kindness at this point. They need to hatch up a plan to have you back in their arms sooner of later.

The moon slowly backed away by crawling. “…Hoping to see that soon…” He went back to his patrols for now.

[ashleyloob]

Hi!

From someone who is disorganized and discouraged, I would love advice on weight-lifting/building muscle. Would you share your understanding of building muscle and the breakdown of diet?

If possible, could you share how you apply what you know to yourself? If you use any tools to help you?

Struggled with working out, gaining weight, and eating my whole life. Thanks!

prefacing this with some important info for fellow disorganized scatterbrains!!!!

the main reason why ppl have trouble sticking to a lifestyle change is because they try to make very drastic changes too quick, and you get overwhelmed and it becomes unsustainable. this is especially an issue for neurodivergent folks, and since it's Tumblr I assume a good chunk of y'all are (me too dw)

DON'T immediately overhaul ur diet and hit the gym 5x a week from day 1!!! hitting tiny goals consistently is also more rewarding than working towards one very large arbitrary goal that you might not reach, esp when it comes to working out. start veeery small if u need to, such as only 10 bodyweight squats per day like i did and go from there. you wanna program ur brain into feeling accomplished to keep you motivated. patience is key!!!!

ok!! now onto the more detailed info below

Disclaimer: I'm still a newbie myself!! only consistently lifting heavy for about 3 months as of this post. I did a good deal of excessive info diving on lifting using the power of Sheer Autism, and my main gym buddy is very experienced & taught me a good chunk of this shit so shout-out to my pal for making all this possible xoxo

so good news!! "building muscle" is very easy for beginners starting from zero. newbie gainz are absolutely real. at this stage you can do just about anything at the gym and get stronger bc u can only go up. BUT!! if you structure it, you can make the process enjoyable and much more efficient. if you're goal oriented (lookin at u ADHD menaces), you'll love the concept progressive overload.

PROGRESSIVE OVERLOAD & SETS/REPS

wikipedia defines progressive overload as: a method of strength training and hypertrophy training that advocates for the gradual increase of the stress placed upon the musculoskeletal and nervous system. in layman's terms, it just means gradually adding more weight as you work out to increase the difficulty as you get stronger. progress is VERY easy to track because of this, and you'll be hitting PRs pretty much every week for the first couple of months and that shit feels fantastic because you physically feel yourself getting stronger so rapidly. I use the app Strong to track my workouts. so, how do we structure progressive overload? that's through sets/reps. A rep is a single execution of an exercise. 1 squat is one rep. 2 squat is 2 reps. and so on. A set is a collection of reps. The format is Sets x Reps, for example: 3x5 means 3 sets of 5 reps. You will rest between sets, and it's typically anywhere from 1 minute all the way up to 5 minutes depending on the level of exertion/type of training you are doing. Heavier weights mean longer rest periods and vice versa.

WHERE DO I EVEN START??

For those interested in barbell training: the r/fitness beginner routine is pretty good! I also recommend 5x5 stronglifts. both are very straightforward, but also note the typical olympic barbell is 45lbs. If this is a weight you struggle with, you can begin with bodyweight exercises, dumbbells, or machines at the gym which are all very BEGINNER beginner friendly. especially when it comes to legs you're probably much stronger than you think. Most people can squat 45lbs first try. don't be afraid -- you're standing on those things all day, they can support hella weight. Like I mentioned earlier, don't be afraid to start veeeery small and work your way up from there. I started at home with doing only bodyweight squats without the barbell, then added on benching with light 7lb dumbbells after a week, then impulse signed up for a gym membership a month later and began to go there to use equipment and now i'm deadlifting over 100lbs as a tiny girl that previously was too weak to even lift a 40lb dog. it snowballs quicker than you think once you gain confidence in your own body and its abilities!

WOAH I DON'T KNOW HOW TO SQUAT/DEADLIFT/BENCH/THIS IS SCARY AND IM FUCKING UP

If you can, i highly recommend getting a personal trainer to assist you, or tag along with a gymrat pal to show you the ropes. This page is also a good resource to learn specific lifts. otherwise, youtube is your best friend. you can record your sets and compare your form to form tutorials on youtube, and actively take notes on what to change the next time you work out. Be an active learner!!! be aware of what muscles are engaged when you lift and how your body feels. almost NOBODY gets it right the first time, esp with barbells. we've all made fools out of ourselves at the gym as beginners it's chill. i find people at the gym are very nice and willing to help you out if you're struggling, and people don't judge at all-- it's very easy to get in your own head in these spaces but most humans there are supportive and want you to succeed, especially since it's a hobby they are also passionate about. the more you do it, the less anxious you get. exposure therapy is very effective!! Also, almost all the barbell exercises can be replaced with smaller dumbbells, and you can do them at home if you get your own set + a workout bench (pretty cheap if u get secondhand, check facebook marketplace/craigslist). i got mad social anxiety myself so i understand sometimes you just can't, and this is an option for those that find public spaces overwhelming.

DIET

I personally don't think specialized diets/precise macro tracking is super duper important for newbies/casuals, only moderately important (spicy take for some but whatever). but you probably naturally will take an interest in diet once you realize it'll help you perform significantly better in the gym. the only macro i track is protein. You can use a TDEE (total daily energy expenditure) calculator to roughly estimate the amount of protein you need for maximum gainz. it's usually around .7-1g of protein for every pound of lean body mass (weight that isn't fat mass). Imma be real it's pretty hard for me to hit the recommended protein goal and most days I don't because my appetite just can't kick in for the amount it demands, and protein is super filling. I found that if i decreased the amount of carbs i eat, i am able to consume more protein bc i guess there's more room in my stomach lol. i eat a fuck ton of greek yogurt, chicken, fish, and tofu. when i started working out, i begin cooking a lot more and found i naturally craved less processed junk foods and snacks because the protein was keeping me full all day which is a plus! Even when im not regularly hitting my protein goal my gym progress is still going well and I think it's simply because my diet is A LOT better than what it used to be in my gremlin days. I also eat a lot more now that i've gained a bit of muscle, so do be prepared for food costs to go up as your metabolism increases and demands more energy to upkeep your gainz.

HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE FOR ME TO LOOK LIKE A MUSCLE MOMMY????

a whileeee. over a year, probably, unless if you're on anabolic steroids (dont ever do that u will quite literally die). and physique is mostly from diet since it's dependent on your body fat percentage, the saying "abs are made in the kitchen" is true. its why you see hyper skinny terminally indoors gamer dudes with abs, even if they'd snap in half if you farted in their general direction. those mfs barely eat they too busy being gamers i am no longer interested in lifting for aesthetics personally since i get more joy from hitting PRs and i'm pretty content with my body image, but ik physique is the reason why most people get into lifting so i'll touch on it. Weightlifting on its own will not make you lose weight or fat. Again, it needs to be supplemented with a healthy sustainable diet (DO NOT DO CRASH DIETS THAT SHIT IS GARBAGE) and a form of cardio. I actually gained 8lbs since I began lifting from water retention & new muscle mass (muscle is more dense than fat, your body retains water when repairing muscle after a gym sesh) but my measurements and pants size have remained the same. I'm short, so something as small as a 5lb increase usually bumped me up a pants size but it didn't this time bc im gettin swole :') if you want to track physique changes, measuring your waistline & progress pics is a better way to do so than the scale. If you want bigger muscles, look into hypertrophy training. it's a tad different from strength training, mainly because you do higher reps at a lower weight.

[lilac-den]

Ok. So... You know that the fandom exist an au call Actor AU right? If the TSR ROs are all actors, how would they be?

A...Actor AU...? 😶 I'm not gonna lie, I am so clueless on this part. But from what I looked up, it tells of characters actually being actors who play in a movie, series, etc...?

So if u mean how the ROs are like if they were actors of TSR... 🤔 I'll answer, but I can imagine the casts all becoming pretty good friends cuz of how well the chemistry is.

Maverick: Still pretty stone-faced/hard to read but by then, his fellow cast members (mainly Rydigan, Ittania, Enid and MC) would have catch hints of how to read him. His parents r still horrible, but in the Actor AU, they're probably separated and he has already cut ties from them.

In his romance tho, he would probably stare at MC a lot, side-eying and taking glances. The crew would probs comment how Maverick is a lot more intense and focused when its scenes between just him and MC...

Rydigan: Even off screen, he's the life of the party and the one who remembers each and every crew members' names. If it isn't his charming smile people fawn for, it's his cheery personality. Wouldn't surprise me if he got the acting gig cuz he was scouted randomly on the street. He's also the one who would probs suggest hanging out together, cementing the bond between the little group.

In his romance, he would try to chat with MC and the crew would note how Rydigan just instinctively knew which direction MC comes from or when MC would arrive on set.

Ittania: She's the one most excited about the role - it's her first big role, but she has done a lot of voice acting and cameo/background roles. Lots of people sees her as a cool, big sister type while others can't help but notice her due to the energy she radiates. Some of the crew and her agency are a little protective tho, given her naive and oblivious nature.

In her romance, she'd be the first one putting an arm around MC's shoulder and greeting her really casually and closely. She'd want to hang out with MC and even ask them if they're down to practice their lines together to better prepare the scenes they have together. Might ask MC if they want to do some voice acting with her too, like a collab.

Enid: She's a very high-demand actress. The crew are surprised the directors and producers even managed to get her to accept the role offer. She's very diligent and doesn't like to make mistakes. She's a bit tough to befriend, but Maverick, Rydigan and Ittania got through her icy exterior. With MC, she'd thought MC might just be a newbie who got lucky until she had a scene with them or she saw how they acted out the scene of the Prologue (the one with the apartment). She's impressed by how much anguish MC managed to act and thus, her opinion of them improved (she refuses to admit that this was the moment she started being their fan).

In her romance, she'd be pretty tough on MC but not out of malice. She has seen how rough the acting world can be and while the gang provides helpful advice, she brings out the harsher criticism. Like how MC's body language isn't portraying right or how they're too casual instead of awkward for a scene about discomfort, little stuff like that. But on rough days, like if MC mess up big time, she'd stay near them and just be that comforting presence before passing a coffee can to MC, a silent way of cheering them up.

Bonus

Sylphina: MC's manager who got roped into the role because the director saw how she behaves with MC and just went "You'll do!" She didn't want to at first, but ended up relenting at MC's request.

Ben: One of the most well-known actors in the industry, a very A-list actor. Is probably the one who dragged recruited MC into the acting business, especially having them join the same agency as zim.

Thank you for the ask, anon!

[tgrailwar-zero]

Checking the time, you realize that you've spent a long time chatting. You felt the evening beginning to wind down. You do feel that you've grown a bit closer to DURYODHANA after choosing to spend time with him.

You hear a few pings on MUSASHI's Flame Pad.

MUSASHI: "Ooh, we're popular. Guess that makes sense, being new blood and all."

☠︎︎ {MNSLYR} - 1 New Message! (ok, i'm free…) 🗲 {THUNDR} - 1 New Message! (It's seems like…) ✩ {3STAR} - 1 New Message! (Imagine it, Saber…) ❀ {JERAN} - 1 New Message! (You're really rough…) ✘ {BLADE} - 1 New Message! (You won ☻…) ✴{JAGUAR} - 1 New Message! (Hey, newbie!…)

Recent Messages: ♛ {JISHNU} - Fighter: JISHNU ⟡ {ADAMAS} - Fighter: ADAMANT ☀︎ {CITT} - Fighter: SUN SOLDIER

-

☕︎ {CHAJIN} - Fighter: CHAJIN ✴ {EAGLE} - Fighter: CUAUHTLI 🗡{STRONG} - Fighter: STRONG MASK ➶ {KARASU} - Fighter: CROW PRIEST ༄ {MOBYDK} - Fighter: MOBY DICK 𓆟 {WTRREV} - Fighter: WATERSIDE REVENANT 𖦹 {TWISTR} - Fighter: FLESH-TWISTER † {FATHER} - Admin: FATHER KOTOMINE

--

-{MNSLYR} -- [ ok, i'm free. up for drinks? same place as last night? should be fine as long as we don't skip the curfew. though i never really cared much about that, they aren't super strict with checking as far as i remember. lemme know if you're comin. we can hit the bar, maybe a few casinos, and i can sneak us back in if the priest and the jaguar come sniffin for us. ez. ]

--

-{THUNDR} -- [ It seems like I've lost my match. It seems like the opponents this cycle are rather strong. Still, I have no intention of losing and hope to push my way through the 'loser's bracket' for another chance at victory. I also heard that you won your match, and pass along my congratulations. With that being said, would you be willing to spar? I would like to try and hone my blade against yours. ]

--

-{3STAR} -- [ Imagine it, Saber. You. Me. Nothing but the stars above us… romance in the air… aaaand your managers don't read these messages, do they? If they do, then this was a joke. Anyways, wanna go gamble? Make some moolah even if you don't win, you know? That's why I love this city. ]

--

-{JERAN} -- [ You're really rough, you know that? I'm still suuuuper sore. Faerie's are delicate, you know? Anyways, I'll be happy to provide my services if you want information on other fighters! And also, I don't know if this interests you, but I've got some pretty sweet intel on Red Saber and his little posse. ]

--

-{BLADE} -- [ You won ☻. I am very pleased to hear that. I am continuing to fight my best as well. I was very intrigued to hear that you found yourselves as part of this Bout as well. Saber. Or 'Samurai', rather. It has been quite some time, and if you are here, then that must mean that my orders have changed. I would like to meet with you and our Masters, unless they wish otherwise for me to remain in the wings. I, as always, am their obedient Servant. ]

--

✴{JAGUAR} - [ Hey, kid! I said I'd message you and invite you out once the day was over. So… are you free? I wanna talk shop with you, and also… like I said before… I really wanna try that new cafe. It'll be fun, I promise (..◜ᴗ◝..)! ]

[callofdudes]

He's been on my mind ❤️ just some little ideas for Rodolfo (Alejandro gets thrown in too let's be honest.)

I love the headcanon I have for Rodolfo (other people also might think this I'm not sure.) But he's small and quiet and doesn't do a lot to make himself known. Personally, Alejandro and him are a fucking UNIT on the field. In any sense.

But my all time headcanon for Rodolfo is when he gets pissed, he gets downright demonic. Like this little man is so calm but if you hurt Alejandro or someone very close to him everyone is going to be questioning what possessed him.

I think if would be funny if instead of going into hiding, when Rudy heard Alejandro was kidnapped he just went off. Screaming Graves out in Spanish from the safehouse. He'd throw things and get absolutely pissed off.

And I know he's more passive aggressive too. Like of they're in a bar and someone is hitting on Alejandro he'd just casually lean over like, "I know you think you're doing good. But you should probably stop." And said other person is all chill because who the fuck is this tiny little thing? "It's ok, I'm not afraid of him."

Alejandro's just chuckling like, "I'm not the one threatening you hermano." (Saw the dialogue on another post and thought it fit them.)

Rodolfo is a family man 100%. He cooks for guests and although Alejandro can also cook he'd much rather kick him out to hang with his friends.

Being a family man, like I said, if you touch, threaten or do anything in-between to his family (close friends, Alejandro etc.) He'll rip your spine out before you know what's happening.

As the smallest of their group he can 100% sneak up on you. Alejandro is much bigger so when they go on covert missions Rodolfo is the ideal man for the job. And just because he's small and a bit shy doesn't me he can't rip you a new one. (Look at König, he's got more height but is also very shy and just as brutal.)

I wouldn't call if social anxiety, but he's very shy and when Alejandro teases him in public, Spanish or not, he gets flustered. He won't admit that sometimes he likes it though. Getting pushed against the wall and whispered things whole their friends are right there on the other side. It scares him right into submission which excites both him and Alejandro.

Can dance.

If you manage to see him dance or he opens up and dances around you he will refuse to elaborate why he can dance.

Designated driver most of the time. But there was one time Price offered to drive to let Rodolfo get shit-faced drunk. At this point he just started throwing it down on the dancefloor with Alejandro. He will dance anything I'd he's drunk.

I just want to see art or writing about Alejandro and Rudy dancing. (Slow, fast, sex- I don't care)

Anyway.

I think that after Rodolfo gets to know Ghost they actually become friends. Ghost is stoic and a bit scary even still to Rodolfo, but he's seen the man under the mask and gotten to know him enough to not shiver in his boots. And I think Ghost finds Rudy's soft-spoken personality a nice break from Johnny.

Alejandro is a simp.

This isn't about him but I can see Rodolfo coming back from an undercover mission with blood all over him and callouses from crawling in the dirt of something. Alejandro wants to make sure he's ok but he also thinks it's SO HOT.

Unlike probably some of the recruits back at the main base for 141 Los Vaqueros don't try to piss the colonel or his sergeant off. They have a very high respect for both and I can only see a few newbies trying anything beyond typical Mexican humor.

If you've played the game, there is this one move where if a person from the opposing team is laying down, you can get behind them and sneak your hands around their throat. You then proceed to jerk your knife back into the jugular. Yeah.

Rodolfo is more about stealth I feel. Although he can go loud, it's much easier for him to focus taking out targets one by one rather than frantically shooting bullets everywhere.

Rodolfo observes everything, therefore has more intel on Alejandro, his team and everyone else combined. He will use this to his advantage in small ways. If he notices Alejandro gets "excited" about a certain thing he does he will make a point to do it more often. Subtly though.

Absolutely will not big spoon. You either hold him close like he's you're whole world or you get the couch. Alejandro thankfully has not had the displeasure of having this interaction.

Both Rudy and Alejandro run warm so they often end up sleeping with whatever little clothing they can. In the winter they bundle up like two peas of the same pod.

Alejandro can handle more alcohol than could kill a man. Rudy gets maybe seven drinks in before he can't figure out what's the ceiling and the floor.

Dutch blitz. He will win.

Unlike with Ghost, Rodolfo gets used to being around Johnny easily. He's like a happier version of Alejandro. So Johnny is a bit more tolerant.

I don't know if he was an only child or not but I'd like to think he was in charge of a lot of stuff in his house, (fucked up or not) so stuff like piling paperwork barely bothers him.

Can sit still for hours. Might need something like a pen to bounce between his fingers though. If it's a meeting he will not move until if is over.

Well, that's all I have for now. But this was me feeding myself more Rodolfo. He's been on my mind and while I like shy Rodolfo I can't help but want more badassery out of this boy. If Alejandro got kidnapped and Rudy lost his cool and started out on a killing spree of Graves' men I would have taken that too.

[fiannalover]

Ok no one ever talks about Atelier Games in this Website so I'm gonna drop my unscheduled unplanned unscripted ramblings and screenshots about the Yumia trailer:

Short Version: Yumia seems to be Very different from every prior Atelier Game, going towards a more Actiony, Traditional RPG and Linear Story Driven focus than even the Iris Series and Ryza, alongside maybe doing so to gameplay elements too. However, the vibes and themes are Excellent, so although this will likely be inevitably a controversial (and potentially newbie boom inducing) title, I'm ready to love it.

Trailer Screenshot rambling under read more

YGGDRASIL, THE WORLD TREE! That's how you know it's a Traditional RPG (disclaimer: this tree has no name or given story relevancy yet, I'm joking around).

We get to see some movement and world design moments alongside the initial narration, and in this regard, Yumia fully follows in the footsteps of Ryza 3, but More. Zipline segments from there are back, and I wouldn't be surprised if Yumia was Fully open world 90% after Ryza got about 85% of the way to being an open-world game.

We get a sneak peek of the verse's Alchemy System here! We can't really say much about it: the Alchemy Core may just be an item a la the supplements of games past or a full game mechanic. If the latter, my immediate thought is that it would be again following up on Ryza 3, this time the key system, maybe on reverse, even: if they keys were an optional feature on the end of synthesis, the core could be the mandatory first step affecting Synthesis Results. We have to wait to get more info, but it's fun to think of.

Here we have the part I feel has the most potential for controversy: Battle System. Very early on, we see Yumia shoot down a fox? Cow? Foxcow hybrid? With a crossbow in real time. No UI Elements were shown in the rest of the trailer, leaving us the question: after Ryza swapped the traditional turn base for ATB, is Yumia going to change it to Real Time Action RPG?

I actually don't think we can say for sure. Again, no UI Elements means that the ambiguous identity animal could just be a non hostile mob you can kill for materials, while actual enemies are fought in turns/ATB. I don't mind which one they go with (Atelier's cousin, Tales, shows Namco does great ARPG), but one way or another, I am GREATLY looking forward to seeing the Turn Based RPG Discourse join the already lovely Bad Takes On Atelier Landscape!

With those rambles on gameplay out of the way, let's talk about the OTHER very different element: the plot.

DWAGON! Always an important Atelier Staple!

Someone get Vayne in here.

If we are to understand these screenshots as happening in chronological order, Yumia already starts the game in a commander position of a village that is preparing against something, and is promptly wiped off the face of the map. Even the most story/drama heavy Atelier games (that I played) (I'll get to you someday, Iris series) kept a generally light hearted and war crimes free atmosphere. We still don't know how it will work out in game, but it is already a very big tone shift.

This part with the wolf man enemy stands ou too for Yumia's capacity as an action protagonist. I'd say this is the most unambiguous show of strength a series character has shown. like yes, Ryza is described as a capable fighter from Ryza 2 onwards, Vayne clearly knows how to fight, but most of their actions are gameplay land. Ryza 2 ALSO leaves it clear that, story wise, Lent is the group's Actual Trained Powerhouse Fighter.

In contrast, both story and gameplay parts of the trailer leave it clear Yumia is physically capable of holding her own, another evidence of how the game is set to be tonally different from predecessors, doubly so as you realize Yumia has no companions with her on this trailer. I even to get to wonder if she'll make her journey fully solo, which would be something COMPLETELY new for the series.

But what is similar?

This part of the trailer, alongside the title's focus on memories, gave me wonderful Ayesha and Ryza 2 memories, my favorite games in the series.

Both Ayesha and Ryza 2 put a big focus on ruins and the memories of yesteryear they hold. Ayesha is set in a dying world filled with buildings left behind by those who killed it. Ryza 2 has you scouring each and every inch of the ruins in search of the memories of people who lived there, their lives, their stories, how they connected to each other.

Yumia seems like it will be focused on that: holding on to the memories that others have entrusted to you, and using them to find what if your right future, your envisioned land. Truth and Ideals, in a way.

Yumia is going to do a lot of things likely radically different. But I'm sure it will keep the core parts right: the alchemy, the light, slice-of-life elements amidst the action, the somber, atmospheric ambience of Dusk and much, much of what the Ryza Trilogy constructed.

And I can't wait to see more.

[apopcornkernel]

i dont know if there's even a ppop presence on tumblr but i do also want to promote ALAMAT, a 6-member idol boy group from the Philippines. Its members comprise of Taneo, Mo, Jao, Tomas, R-ji, and Alas. They debuted in 2021, and their creative direction centers on championing the Filipino identity and culture through their music.

sorry that ^ was a copypaste but it's a very useful and concise copypaste LOL but onto my own promo:

(note: also most of these videos have english subs!!)

(extra note bc this issue always pops up whenever locals encounter alamat: mo is always wearing black hairstyes bc he is blasian and not bc he is appropriating from black culture hdfjhdf)

KASMALA, the inverted Tagalog word for "strong" (malakas), is the MV that really did numbers on social media iirc. The video direction focused on the "human zoo" in the St. Louis' World Fair of 1904 (which included Filipinos specifically Igorots), and a general theme of anti-Filipino racism by white people (who are represented as ominous figures literally dressed in all white)

personal opinion: the music video is great but i personally think they have better songs, music-wise. and i'm going to give you an example of that by introducing you to my ALL-TIME FAVORITE ALAMAT SONG!!!

ILY ILY, a transliteration of "Ili-Ili Tulog Anay", incorporates the melody and lyrics of the Ilonggo lullaby it derives its title from. The MV and lyrics both work together to portray the experience of being an OFW/having an OFW parent. OFWs, or overseas Filipino workers, refer to Filipinos who go abroad in search of jobs that have better pay, so that they can remit money back to their families in the Philippines.

personal opinion: this is their best song THIS IS THEIR BEST SONG EVER OF ALL TIME and lyca gairanod is such a perfect singer for this. her ethereal crooning really gave me chills the first time i heard it UGH

DAYANG, the term for the wife of a Datu, is one of their most earworming songs ever. It's a gorgeous love song and what I would recommend to newbies if they want to get into alamat <3

personal opinion: The MV is kinda ass because it's just a super long extended ad for DITO PH (in terms of story and also bc they really missed out on doing a vid that drew more on culture esp bc dayang is a historical noble title and they used tausug words and designs for the graphics an the dance itself already incorporated pangasik dance which is also from the tausug people LIKEEE?? they've always promoted other cultures of the philippines i know they can do it but because of CAPITALISM--). But the song bangs so severely, as a pop enjoyer this is peak pop for me.

OH I ALMOST FORGOT DAGUNDONG

DAGUNDONG, a song basically recounting the colonial history of the Philippines from Spain to America, is just so fucking good you should watch/listen to it rn. There's EN subs don't worry you won't miss out on the context. This is colonial rage it's so satisfying I still remember where I was when they dropped this.

personal opinion: FOREVER OBSESSED WITH HOW THEY SAY "dahil puso mandirigma di papakutsa di papapugon" you guys have no idea how much i sing that line to myself sooo satisfying. Instant earworm this song i swear.

OK ONE LAST one last and i'm done. okay.

MAHARANI, a Sanskrit term for the wife of a Maharaja (translated as "great queen"), heavily features singkil, a Maranao dance which uses bamboo poles like tinikling does. The song also uses SEAsian instruments like kanun, gamelan, and gangsa. Also BINI's Jhoanna plays one of the main characters here!!!

personal opinion: this is their most pop-sounding song, which i think is slightly carried by the video i'm sorryyy. it's catchy though!! and i looove the part somewhere halfway where alas starts his verse, singing it in a more spoken-word way

___

okay 5 songs is. probably enough. this post is already kinda long shdfjskdff but yeah. pls check them out if you can hehe <3

also ppop idols are just really funny. there's no concept of an idol image so they just tweet shit. alamat jao gave out his genshin UID after a fan tweeted about having co-oped with him in genshin, and then after that he started answering questions with the hashtag "#canceljao" making a lot of magiliws (alamat fans) confused, and then he posted a classic iphone notes apology like this 😭

i'll do a bini version after this my girls deserve more international hype. they occupy a more girlcrush pop genre but they're just as chaotic as alamat if not even more 😭 there are entire THREADS on twitter of them just being hilarious jdhfkshgf i love them so much

thanks for reading <3

[taxes-evasion]

OMG HIII im so excited for a creepypasta writer :3 may i please request you write for hoodie nd masky, reader also being a proxy!!!! it could be general hcs or whatevs, up to you!! if you dont want to do this req, its ok, if u want me to req smthn else u can always pm me

HIII and thank you so much! I hope I complied with your request (sorry if I didn't).

Characters included: Reader (as proxy), Slenderman (named sometimes as Boss), Masky and Hoodie + mention of other proxies.

Small Warnings: mention of kidnapping, mention of dizziness, actions of light bullying, mention of broken bones, deep cuts, bruises, killing and curse words. Proxies are not kind toward newbie at all :(

⚠️Writer's Notices⚠️: I think I expanded the request without intending to? I'm not sure about that. I just like to give a lot of informations about the characters, so I also put a very light backstory of the Reader. I hope this doesn't bother you and, of course, if you wish, you can skip everything and go to the part that interests you the most. I'm not judging. Please enjoy!

𝑀𝐴𝑆𝐾𝑌 𝐴𝑁𝐷 𝐻𝑂𝑂𝐷𝐼𝐸 𝑊𝐼𝑇𝐻 𝐴 𝑃𝑅𝑂𝑋𝑌 𝑅𝐸𝐴𝐷𝐸𝑅

HOW DID YOU BECOME A PROXY?

You are probably in contact with kids/young adults who saw Slenderman;

Maybe a babysitter or a psychiatrist;

The fact is that you will never encounter proxies initially;

It is very important for Slenderman to decide for himself his servants;

Toby had once brought a girl into the mansion unbeknownst to Boss... Let's say she stayed for a short time;

Of course, Toby doesn't remember her anymore;

One day someone tells you about this strange, tall and thin man who appears in their dreams and in the woods;

However, one day you were normally on your way home when you started to feel dizzy;

And... surprise! Shortly afterwards you were in a dark office without any kind of light, forced to listen to a faceless man;

You don't remember much about how you get there but your attention, of course, is not centered on that small detail;

BUT WHY WERE YOU RECRUITED BY SLENDERMAN?

Most likely because you have a very good intellect and you reason efficiently;

The Big Boss really needs proxies like that;

Not an athletic person? DON'T WORRY! Slenderman already knows everything about you and what type of training you need, he already comes up with a training program just for you!

(Be grateful and don't try to run away, this tired old man ain't got no time to come and haunt you) :(

WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?

One surprise after another, apparently! (actually, you could easily imagine what is about to happen);

You are entrusted to some proxies who will take you under their "protective" wing;

These proxies are: Masky, Hoodie, and Toby!

But mainly Masky and Hoodie since they are the only ones who have actually done any training when they arrived at the mansion;

Toby isn't very present because he doesn't care much and would still struggle to have an initial relationship given his Antisocial Personality Disorder;

But don't worry! He'll get used to you soon!

HOW DO MASKY AND HOODIE BEHAVE TOWARDS YOU?

They are slightly heartless bitches :(

(they're actually "somehow" nice to you but not too much);

I mean they would help you with training but make fun of you whenever they can;

This mainly Masky;

Hoodie simply giggles meanly and nods;

DON'T LET THESE "INSTRUCTORS" OF YOURS FIND OUT THAT YOU'RE SENSITIVE OR THAT YOU CRY EASILY!

(This is honestly me);

I say this for your own good, really;

If Masky notices a sniffling or shining eyes from tears that would like to fall... you will find out what hell is;

You will no longer know what dignity is...

"Awwww, don't tell me our little newbie is going to cry, right?" it may be the phrase you'll hear the most;

Masky will basically yell it in the presence of ALL the residents of the mansion just to give you a reason to cry more;

"Come on Masky, can't you see that the frail little thing here is shaking? Give them some personal space."

Another reality revealed, but this time it's Hoodie's fault;

He probably won't yell it like Masky, but he'll still say it in a higher-than-average tone of voice;

BUT WHAT IF YOU'RE ACTUALLY VERY BADASS?

If they notice that you are actually very neutral and don't care about their nasty comments, they will simply stop;

After all, it's no fun if there are no reactions;

Basically, they will just give you the advice you need to improve;

However, you may also have a short fuse!

Maybe you shouldn't point it out, you might unintentionally push yourself further, and since Masky also has a short fuse, you could start a fight with him;

If there's Hoodie nearby he'll stop Masky before killing you (but you'll have some deep cuts, bruises and, at worst, broken bones);

However, in the absence of Hoodie/other proxies, you will be killed without much scruples;

Butttt... consider yourself lucky because usually Hoodie and Masky are together all the time, either for tasks and because they have established a good relationship and don't spend much time with the other residents;

Above all they are good instructors;

They know when you've reached your limit and will stop you if they see you're going too far;

They will give you advice and plan a diet if they see that it is necessary;

It could have been worse, couldn't it?

WHAT DO THEY LOOK LIKE DURING TRAINING?

As said before, they would certainly help you a lot;

Both with advice and by encouraging you to keep going;

(they will become more and more familiar with this as time goes on);

However, I like to imagine that Hoodie does the exercises with you, both to keep fit and to be an example for you;

Masky observes the two of you, smoking his cigarettes;

In some cases he will join you;

(he made a bet on who does the most running laps with Hoodie);

"You know, Y/N, Masky has never been able to beat me in a running challenge", Hoodie usually makes fun of Masky;

"For fuck's sake, just shut up!" and Masky responds in a bad way;

While they may seem quite calm while training you, don't forget that they are professional assassins;

You don't really want to see them when they have to torture/kill someone;

But one day, for sure, you're going to see that because, ops!, from now on you are a proxy;

Good luck with that!

Okay, that's all about our two favorite proxies!

I really have to write headcanons about their backstories because I've honestly always wanted to do that.

I hope you enjoyed this!

♡

[thiniceofeternalyouth]

MISLEADIN' ME SERIES: CHAPTER TWELVE

THIEF OF THREE DESTINIES

⊳ Gojo Satoru x f!reader

series masterlist

Genre: angst, fluff, sci-fi, cosmology.

Words count: ~13k

⊲ previous

[July 1, 2020; 02:17am; hunters' hq]

[02:01] You: Megumi's back, he's fine

Delivered.

Unread.

[02:11] You: u ok?

Delivered.

Unread.

Gojo wasn't answering your calls either. You were drowning in an abyss of intrusive thoughts, each one worse than the last. Was he okay? If he was all right, why was he silent? Such silence was like the silence of a dead man - just as endlessly cold.

You stirred, pushing the images away from you and setting the phone aside. Maybe that was your lesson to learn. Wasn't that what he meant by loneliness?

There was nothing left of Kyle, not even his cold corpse was honored to rest deep underground. His image along with the vague tracings of his voice seemed to beg you not to forget him, but you knew that every image and every melancholy has a year later. Eventually, a wave of new memories would erase his still-green eyes. 

The moral compass had been broken, trampled, torn to pieces. In which direction should the lost traveler go now? This entire time traveler had been walking along the dark side of the moon towards the calling sun - towards something bright and warm. Where would the road lead if the sun was stolen?

"Meg," you called out detachedly. "Asleep?"

"No," replied the mechanical voice.

"I have a riddle."

"I'm listening."

"There are two hunters," you began, staring blankly at the black monitor screen. "One is experienced, the other is a newbie. They were surrounded by demons, the experienced one was killed, and the newbie survived. What kinda a case is this?"

"The newbie was with the demons," Meg replied without hesitation or questioning intonation.

"Think again," you said, admonishing more yourself than the artificial intelligence.

Meg was silent, but it was as if you could hear her digging through the informational bowels of universal human knowledge, and she was doing it so fast that it would take you a lifetime to absorb that much information. "Hmm...," Meg drawled. "The messengers don't get killed?"

"The messengers don't get killed," you confirmed in a whisper, watching in the extinguished monitor as your eyes went black.

You didn't even notice that you had chewed your own thumb to a bloody pulp. Those devils knew everything. From start to finish. They knew you'd broken into a settlement, knew which one, knew that Kyle would be going instead of you that day. So where was the rat lurking? Was it one of the people in the void? Or was it one of the people who lived in the house?

Knock-knock.

Your only task was to keep your head down. You knew exactly what they were after, and they seemed to be getting close. Every day it became harder for you to control the turns of the invisible blades embedded in your body. You wiped the moisture from your dark eyes with a sharp movement, and making sure you looked like anyone else, you walked to the door.

A pair of sad, frightened child's eyes greeted you. "Why ya still awake?" you asked Yuuji tiredly, trying to maintain a neutral, if not positive, attitude. The boy looked down at first, before peeking over your shoulder. "Okay, come in," you surrendered, throwing up your hands.

He walked hesitantly over to your bed and sat down on the very edge. It looked like he was about to fall to the floor. "I... I brought something," Itadori began in a shaky voice and reached into his pocket with the same hands. "I think...," he stammered, and you could see him literally chewing the inside of his cheeks. "I'm sorry, but I don't think you should have thrown it away," he stated in an already firm voice, looking you dead in the eye. In his outstretched hand lay a silver bracelet, mockingly sparkling. "Especially in the trash can," boy added more quietly, trying to hide from you again. "It's a memory."  

"I've never complained about my memory," you said, shrugging.

"That's not the point!" he protested, and the bracelet almost fell out of his hand. Itadori immediately pressed it to his chest. "Don't you wanna have a piece of him always near you? It's very precious," he whispered, pressing the jewelry harder against his chest.

"This thing's worth 20 bucks."

"Don't you dare say that," Itadori hissed. His fear faded away, making way for anger at the words you had said. "Take it!" he ordered, holding out the jewelry to you again. "Take it, now!"

It was the one shining thing that didn't make you want to take it or steal it. You walked over to the bed and sat down next to the boy, and you had no time for inner cries and agonizing - you couldn't show weakness in front of anyone. As soon as you took the bracelet in your hands, you felt like the ultimate fool. Why did you throw it away in the first place? It had never been a soulless piece of metal, at least not since you'd put it on your brother's arm.

You glanced around the workroom. Kyle wasn't here anymore, and he never would be. Maybe you'd never see him again, or maybe he'd see you in hell.

Along with everyone else.

"Thank ya," you smiled weakly but sincerely at Itadori. Maybe he sensed it, maybe he heard it in your voice, but he fidgeted restlessly, dropping his gaze to the floor again.

"What are you thanking me for...? I yelled at you. I'm sorry," he mumbled, and the swollen red face was drawn again with sorrow. Where is the artist who painted such things on children's faces? Maybe if you ripped their heart out, you'd feel a little better.

You wrapped your fingers around Yuji's chin, making him look up at you. "For being more mature than me today," you tried to wipe away the tears that had started streaming down his cheeks before you'd even finished speaking. He snuggled into your shoulder, muffling the tearing sobs. You didn't pay attention to how wet your sweatshirt was from his tears and snot, only gently stroking his back. "It's gonna be okay," you repeated the words like a mantra straight into the pink top of his head.

His body was clearly exhausted, and he collapsed in your arms. Yuji seemed to have cried for so long that all the water had gone out of his organism. "Try to get some sleep, 'kay?" you said, adjusting the pillow on the bed with your hand. At his exhausted questioning look, you shrugged. "Ya can go to your room if ya want. It's just that I remember ya saying it's quieter at my place."

You patted him on the top of his head and got up from the bed, heading back to the computer chair. A murmur behind you made you chuckle quietly - apparently Itadori had made his choice. "Y/N?" he addressed you quietly, covering himself with a blanket. You hummed questioningly. "You didn't call sensei?"

You didn't want to disturb an already wounded young heart. "He's busy right now, so I didn't bother him with the news," you said evasively. "Just texted him to say that Megumi is fine. Now go back to sleep."

A fresh morning breeze wandered through the room, taking all the memories with it as it made its way back through the window into the freedom of the bay. There really wasn't much stuff - you only needed three boxes to pack all of Kyle's clothes. Was it always this black and gray, or had you stopped perceiving colors?

You folded another T-shirt carefully, deliberately slow. After all, this was the last day you'd ever been this close to him. As you put the folded T-shirt in the box, you glanced at the unopened men's perfume on the bedside table. Would anyone need it now?

When you picked up the black sweatshirt, the door clicked open. The fresh air in the room was instantly freezing, chilling to the bone. Rachel was like the walking dead, even the large eyes on her gaunt face showed no signs of life. She stood on the other side of the bed, across from you, staring blankly at the sweatshirt you were holding.

You tentatively held it out to Rachel, and she took the sweatshirt in her hands after a few more seconds of staring blankly at the space. "Um...," you began quietly, watching her go through the clothes in her hands. "I packed everything here, so... When ya go to Hopetown, bring it with ya, 'kay?"  

Rachel covered her eyes for a moment, her nose buried in the sweater as if she hadn't heard you at all. You looked away awkwardly and headed for the exit. "Ya're going too," she demanded in a strangled voice.

You sighed convulsively and turned around - Rachel was still standing with her back to you. "Rach, I don't have time to stand by a tombstone that doesn't even have a body underneath it." 

Everything froze. Your ears heard nothing, your eyes saw nothing. Your skin felt neither wind nor touch. Even your memory stopped - all the images melted away, spreading out into the obscurity.

You came to your senses from the impact of your head hitting the floor. Rachel was on top of you, clutching your throat with both hands - she must have been doing it for a long time because your chest was already cramping helplessly. Certain places on your body were aching desperately, especially your ribs and cheekbones. "Rach," you wheezed, grasping weakly at her wrists.

She held it all in not making a sound, and you could have sworn you could see the muscles in her face tense behind the shroud of rage. You tried to reach out to her again, but another pathetic croak escaped your lips, and Rachel let go of your neck, whimpering suppressedly. "Ya're going," she hissed, getting up from the floor.

You pulled yourself up, coughing and rubbing your neck. "Rachel," your voice became an order of magnitude rougher as if your sister's hands were still clutching your throat. "I understand ya feel bad," you watched as she walked back to the bed, looking down at the same sweatshirt and wiping silent tears from her face. "But why ya so angry with me?"

She turned around sharply, meeting your uncomprehending gaze. "Because it's ya who should bear that burden, not me!" she shouted out desperately. "It's-," her own sobbing interrupted her, and she tried to push it away, hiding her face in hands. "It's all your fault, so why am I theone in tears right now?"   

"I didn't ask anyone to follow me-"

"Shut your fucking mouth!" the perfume flew just an inch from your face. When it hit the wall, it left nothing behind but shards that crumbled to the floor. "Shut up!" Rachel gasped and agonized with her own emotions. Despite the fact that she let them out, it didn't get any easier in the slightest. "Ya just an ungrateful bitch," she hissed weakly. "Ya'll go to the funeral. Otherwise your white-haired weirdo will find out-"

"He knows," you cut it off.

"That's how it is," Rachel said, naively slamming her eyes shut. "Then it's strange that he's still with ya. I can barely stand ya, even though I've been around since I was a kid."

"Rachel," you sighed tiredly. "Let's just not fight, 'kay? This isn't really a good time for that."

Wiping the nearly dried paths of tears from her face, your sister straightened to her full height and headed for the exit. "Ya're going or ya don't have a sister anymore either," she mumbled absently, shoving you with her shoulder.

It was definitely her favorite.

"We are gathered here today to honor the memory of our beloved son, brother, friend..."

The weather was clearly mocking. The midday sun brightly illuminated the growing greenery, the black-clad people, and the names on the tombstones. There wasn't a cloud in the sky, just a vast blue. Nature didn't seem to want to grieve with the people. She didn't care about all of you.

You stood away from everyone else, leaning against a tree. There was no place to hide in this cemetery field, and the tree seemed to be your only refuge. You pressed your shoulder against it as hard as you could, smoking your third cigarette.

"Words cannot express the full horror of this tragedy that has touched us all..." 

Tragedy.

Megumi and Danielle stood in the front rows, huddled together as if trying to become one. Both were pale and lifeless, but Dany still had the strength to cry. She stood with her face buried in his neck, unable to look at the closed coffin, and the boy stroked her head inconsolably, unable to take his eyes off of it. It was unclear which of them had it worse, but they decided to deal with it together.

It brought some people together.

Rachel stood beside them, holding Mike in her arms. She kept her hand on the redhead's head, pulling her son closer to her chest as if ordering him not to look. You could see his little body flinch and twitch. Rachel never spoke to you after that fight. She didn't even look in your direction.

Someone was distanced by it.

Frank's skin was the color of his hair and beard, but he struggled to keep that same good-natured expression, though it was completely drenched in sadness. He stared blankly at the empty coffin. How could you look him in the eye now that you couldn't even bring the body?

The people from the void who had come to the funeral were frightened. This man had saved them, fought for them, but if he was suddenly mortal, didn't that mean the rest of you were too?

Tragedy inevitably befalls everyone. For some it prepares them, for others it comes completely unexpectedly. It leaves behind either a hardened spirit or a broken heart - a person must choose for themselves.

"Wherever he goes, I believe he will end up in the arms of God..."

If God didn't have time to keep track of everything going on here, who's to say he had time to keep track of the other side? Did it even exist? You looked around the cemetery helplessly. There was a whole universe under each tombstone, but what would be under your brother's one?

"Y/N," greeted the woman who came up behind you.

"Camila," you said, taking another drag on your cigarette. The woman leveled herself at you and stared through her dark glasses at the spectacle in front of you. "I didn't think anyone from the old generation would come here."

"Can we be judged for that?" asked Camila plaintively. "Kyle's death hardly our business."

"He's Frank's son," you reminded her. "To Frank ya owe a lot."

"I didn't come here to bicker," the woman said sternly, nervously smoothing her already perfectly bunched hair. "I want you to give me my sons back."

"Did that one death scare ya like that?" you raised your eyebrows in surprise.

"One?" barked Camila, but immediately lowered her voice so as not to draw attention to herself. "Whatever. Anyway, I'm expecting Axel and Ryan home tomorrow. If not, we'll come pick them up ourselves," she gave you a meaningful look as if she wanted you to feel like you were nothing.

"Will mom's skirt save them in battle, too?"

There was a resounding smack. You bit your lip and put a hand to your aching cheek.

"It's called concern," she hissed, leaning over you. "You don't know of such a thing, do you? You don't care who you let go to waste."

"Concern?" you chuckled. "It didn't keep your hubby safe," when she tried to hit you again, you intercepted her arm, digging your nails into her skinny wrist. The hiss of bubbling blood eclipsed all sound, so you didn't immediately notice that there was no noise at all. No voices, no stomping. "Hit me again and I'll rip your heart out. Just like everyone else who will come to our house," you had barely finished grinning when a ringing silence that you hadn't sensed earlier hit your ears. Stunned by this, you turned towards the people gathered here to pay their honor. All of them were looking at you.

Shoving the frightened Camila's hand away from you, you strode away from the cemetery to the taunts of the midday sun.

Gojo thought he was doing the right thing. At least for the first couple days. Wasn't it fair to feed you the same pill you kept giving him? If you didn't give it a taste, how else would you know how bitter it was? That's how he reassured himself when he saw another missed call. If on the first day it made him smile stupidly, after a while he grew more and more anxious - maybe you've forgotten him already? He had to hand it to you - in all this time you called only four times, the last call was dated last night. It wasn't enough for him. He didn't want you to miss him only at night, he wanted to be in your thoughts every morning and evening, whether you were eating or fighting.

Gojo didn't miss your messages either. Megumi did well, how could he not? It couldn't have happened to any of his students otherwise.

He muffled the panic rising in his chest by poking curse's eye out with his heel. The eye burst with a squelching sound. He couldn't count how many times it had been these days because he had personally volunteered for mission after mission. "God, that's a lot of yelling," he muttered, tucking his hands into his pockets and pressing down on the ugly head even harder. Whether there was a brain inside the curse head or something else, Gojo's shoes were immediately stained with purple goo.

Gojo didn't hear the phone ring because of the ultrasound, but he pulled it out when he felt it vibrate in his pocket. Biting his lip in frustration, he stared at the caller's name for a while longer before answering. "Hey," Gojo chirped.  

"Jesus, what's that sound in the background?" hissed Megumi. The boy was heard to pull away from the phone.

"Oh, wait a second," Gojo rambled apologetically. He squatted down, and leaning over the curse, grabbed it by something that resembled a throat. When the covers crunched, when the curse froze, opening its mouth in an already silent scream, a mad chuckle escaped Gojo's lips. Clenching his hand even tighter, he ripped the creature's head off with a single tug. Tossing it away from him, Gojo leaned the phone to his ear again. "Better?" he asked carelessly.  

A long sigh sounded from the other side. "Are you really that busy or are you really just an unscrupulous asshole?"

"Hey!" he resented. "It's been so long since we've seen each other, and you don't have a warm word to say?"

"You should come. Anyway, the ceremony's already over, but I think it would be respectful to at least show up here," Megumi muttered moodily, and what was even more surprising to Gojo was the weakness hiding behind the usual scowl.

"Ceremony?" wondered Gojo, feeling his palms begin to sweat. "What did you guys do in there without me?" he asked, trying to suppress a nervous grin. 

"Uh," Megumi began uncertainly. "Didn't Y/N tell you?"

"Told me about what?" he inquired, smiling forcefully. There was silence on the other end, and the longer it lasted, the harder his heart began to pound. It pounded loudly and painfully, breaking all his arrogance and confidence in his own actions. "Megumi, told me about what?" 

Before his heart could stop, there was a rustling sound as if Megumi had pulled the phone as close to him as possible. "Kyle's dead."

They'd never been close. A few insults and promises to kick each other's asses were all they had in common. However, Gojo wasn't hurting for himself right now.

That's why you called him last night. You had called him twice in a row, and while Gojo had hesitated to answer the first call, the second one had made him throw the phone away. He'd been told that many times, directly or veiledly, jokingly or seriously, but as soon as he waved his hand, the words evaporated before they reached his soul. He couldn't even look up now, though. For the first time he felt like nothing.  

Sitting at the empty dining room table, Rachel stared out the window as if there were something more mesmerizing than the everyday sunset. Whether she prayed, pleaded, or argued, the inhabitants of heaven were adamant or deaf. The angels and their arrows did not care about human suffering.

Gojo was sure she heard the front door slam, so why didn't she turn around? The only thing that moved was her fingers, which scrabbled against the tabletop, occasionally touching the crystal ashtray that held at least twenty or so cigarette butts. The ashes smeared awkwardly against the table were like feelings - neither reversed nor returned, only wiped away with a damp cloth. "Hey," Gojo sounded muffled in spite of his ringing voice. "Sorry for your loss," Rachel never turned around. No nod of her head, no greeting. "Um... You know where Y/N is? Is she still in town?"  

"Why would I know where your monster is," she mumbled. Despite her slurred words, there was no bottle or glass on the table in front of her. Apparently, her father's influence was taking its toll.

"Uh? You're her sister," he said with a perplexed shrug.

Rachel clicked her tongue lazily, not taking her eyes off the window. "I wish I wasn't."

"Oh, I see," he drawled, an arrogant smirk in his voice. "So you're the poor unfortunate girl. The only one who lost someone, huh?" he tilted his head sideways, looking at your sister. There was no child sitting in front of him, so where did such childish behavior come from? "Grow up already."

Rachel sat still for a few seconds, then slowly turned her body and stared at Gojo with empty eyes. He'd come to her house, to her family, hung around her sister, failed to show up at her brother's funeral, and dared to mock her.

"Tranquillity."   

Gojo remained standing as he was. He realized that something had happened; even though he wasn't shackled, he felt strange as if the chain did exist and it was beginning to be slowly pulled around his neck. "Is that all you got?" he asked excitedly. There was only one desire burning in him now - to test the limits of his own abilities. 

If she'd had the strength to smile, her face would have contorted into a mad grimace, but right now Rachel just kept watching him. Nothing reflected in her glassy eyes. No surprise, no satisfaction. "What were ya saying about your infinity?" she asked blankly, not expecting an answer. It was not enough for her. If he couldn't feel the mental pain, let him feel the physical.

"Tranquillity."

She was ready to tear him and his equanimity. Thin black strips crawled along her fingers, wrapping around every inch of tanned skin.

It was hard for him to breathe, but the reverse technique was doing its job - it broke the chains time after time, but they were put back on, each one thicker than the last. His hand flew involuntarily to his throat.

"Rachel, that's enough!" shouted Frank, rushing down from the second floor. He hadn't even had time to change - he was still wearing his black suit. "I said STOP!" he howled, and Rachel's head popped up. When the chains of dark energy stopped restraining Gojo, he began gasping for air.

Frank walked over to him, and taking him by the shoulder, looked him over anxiously. "Son, ya okay?" Gojo nodded, rubbing his throat. "And ya," he turned angrily to his daughter. "What the hell ya doing?"  

Rachel showed an emotion other than total absence for the first time in a day. She laughed bitterly. "I'm just wondering why everyone is defending her."

"I don't know who exactly ya talking about," the man hissed. "But we have a duty to protect her because she's our family."

Rachel laughed even harder, and the louder her laugh was, the crazier it sounded. "Mom never carried her under her heart! She's here because you're a hearty idiot! You just felt sorry-"

"Shut your mouth!" snapped Frank sharply.

"I won't!" she yelled, jumping up from her chair. "None of this would have happened if it wasn't for her! I just want to come home and know that Kyle will meet me! Alive!" she gasped, muffling her own sobs. "And now he's gone. All because ya took pity on her once! You should have just left her to them," she whimpered weakly, her head collapsing onto her chest.

"You don't feel well. Go to your room," Frank ordered softly.

She glared sharply at him, for ire gave her strength. "Ya can't tell me what to do!"

"I am your father. Sure I can," he replied firmly, and though he kept his voice low, it sounded much louder than his daughter's screams. 

"Obedience."

Rachel groaned painfully and tried to keep her legs in place, but they were trying to get off the floor against her will. "Fuck you," she spat out, and then she went up the stairs and disappeared to the second floor.

Gojo watched Frank anxiously. The man was breathing heavily, staring after his daughter and rubbing his chest as if his heart were painfully throbbing. His arm was covered in dark, wriggling stripes, and when Frank's legs started to wobble, Gojo picked him up immediately. "Hey, hey, oldman," he gibbered worriedly. "What's the matter?" he dragged Frank to the couch, and sitting him down, poured him some water. 

"Thanks, son," the man took the glass with a shaky hand and took a couple sips. "Sorry for no warm welcome today. We're all on edge right now," setting the water aside, Frank pulled back the collar of his shirt. The dark lines wrapping around his collarbones almost reached his heart. "Shit...and here I thought I can live to fight another day," he grinned grimly.

Frank wasn't a fool. He may not have been the smartest man, but he had a lot of experience under his belt. He saw no anger or irritation on Gojo's face at what had happened, just the faded blue eyes. "Lost someone?" the man asked.

Gojo nodded briefly without looking up. "Yeah," he said quietly. 

"She's in the church now," Frank prompted politely. "She went to give some things away, so... You'll find her there."

"Do you really think I'd leave an old man with a heart attack?" clinging to the remnants of his temper, Gojo glanced slyly at Frank.

He got a fatherly slap, not hard enough to hurt him, but hard enough to set him straight. "Go already," Frank growled, and Gojo didn't bother to argue or bicker with him. Rubbing his aching heart, Frank barely waited for the door to slam shut. "Ya left too soon, Kyle," he sobbed, digging his fingernails into the blackened skin. "They still need your care."   

You dragged the boxes to the far corner hidden behind the columns and unlit by hundreds of candles. You did it as quietly as possible, trying not to disturb the praying parishioners. On days like this, the church came alive. The hall filled with light from the fire was crowded with people, and those who did not have enough room in the pews reverently said their prayers on the floor, on their knees. Everyone was silent, all those present turned only to God. Paradoxically, it only took one dead person to do this. On other days, the place was not gloomy, but rather empty - all the voices of those who came here echoed off the walls.

You could barely lift the boxes as if each one weighed a ton. When you would sneak quietly into a corner with a box, your forearms would ache terribly and you would want to drop everything or carry it back home. Were clothes always this heavy? Or was it the weight of parting?

When you reached the last box, you took your time putting it down. You held it tightly to you as if you were hugging it, and sat down on the floor next to the rest of the things. Watching the people in the gap between the columns, you wondered - perhaps you should have done the same. No one had ever explained what silent prayers could do. It was something intimate, something that remained only between man and the creature from above.

Man is all-powerful. Man is fragile. A person can move mountains or they can break their heel jumping off the bench. Person loves and hates, misses and has fun, makes mistakes and feats, but they forget that all this exists only because of them. Without them there would be neither conquered mountains, nor love nor hate.

And then the man dies.

"Y/N," a soft voice addressed you. "Don't sit on the cold floor. You'll catch a cold," you looked up and saw the Holy Father holding out his hand to you.

Setting the box aside with the rest of Kyle's belongings, you took his palm and stood up, shaking off your feet. "Kalev," you awkwardly tried to shove the boxes away so they wouldn't get in the way. "Um... Thank ya for performing the ceremony."

"What are you talking about?" wondered the Holy Father quietly. He was still dressed in his ceremonial robes, and unlike the others, it was completely white except for the wide collar - it was embroidered with silver threads. "Of course, I agreed to it. I don't care about the rumors. We're all human, and we deserve to go to the other world accompanied by a God."

"Yeah," you muttered, faltering and not looking up. "I guess ya're right."

"What's troubling you?" he asked worriedly, barely touching your hand. "We can always talk," seeing your gaze flicker around the church, he squeezed your palm harder, trying to reassure you.

You knew what awaited you behind those columns, away from the congregation. A small, cramped room that separated the speakers by a mesh partition. "There's no way I'm going to the confessional," you grinned nervously, feeling the back of your neck sweat.

"I didn't say anything about confession," the Holy Father smiled modestly. "I was talking about ordinary human interaction," the man spoke the most ordinary words, but the aura around him radiated a light-winged warmth as if he really was protected by a god. "I will always be happy to talk to you, Y/N," he continued to hold your hand in his, wrinkled and cognizant of the years that carried not only his joys and sorrows, but others' as well. "But it seems to me that someone else wants to talk to you now."

His kind gaze didn't change a bit as he looked over your shoulder. When he let go of your hand, he nodded softly, ordering you to go. As if it were a command from above, you turned around.

You couldn't see his face in the shadow of the columns, but you knew who it was. You walked past Gojo and sat down on the step without even looking at him. Since it was the will of the shadows, let the expression on his face remain a mystery to you forever. "I'm sorry," came the husky voice that had always been ringing and cheerful.

"Me too," you replied detachedly, watching the deserted town.

He carefully sat down beside you, keeping his distance. "Why didn't you tell me what happened?"

"So ya didn't see the calls and texts after all."

"I saw, but...," the heated tiles beneath his feet began to crumble. Gojo had heard once of that feeling of the ground leaving beneath one's feet, but no one had warned him that it would do so slowly. "If you only texted me about what happened, I would be here right away."

"Why," you couldn't even catch the sarcasm in the impersonality of your voice. "Did something like this really have to happen for ya to finally pick up the phone and say ya 'kay?"

So that was it. You didn't ask for help or pity. You just wanted to be reassured that he was okay. "I really am an asshole," there was none of his usual sass in his voice. Just the realization crashing down on him like a slab of granite, crushing all arrogance and carelessness. "I'm sorry. I'm not- I'm just- God," he buried his face in his palms. "I can't even find the right words."

"Whatever," you said, and your alienation did not catch his despair. "I still have more to think about besides another person being disappointed in me."

"No, no, no. It's not like that at all," he mumbled in a weak voice. He cupped your face. To his surprise, you gave in effortlessly as if you were a rag doll. "Only a brainless idiot would be disappointed in you," he leaned his forehead against yours. "And I'm an idiot, but I have brains. Right?" he asked you, and noticing the faintly familiar wrinkles in the corners of your eyes, he smiled, even though his eyes were glistening treacherously.

"If you had brains, you'd run away," you didn't realize that both his mind and his heart had been screaming to the contrary for a long time. That's why he was here now, in front of you and with you, all broken with naked soul. 

Gojo pressed you tighter against him and even pushed you back a little, so as not to disturb the exiting parishioners, but you didn't notice anything. On the other hand, he noticed everything, right down to the way you burrowed harder into his neck when someone walked past you. "Mochi," he rubbed his nose softly against the top of your head. "Is anyone home?"

"No," you replied without raising your head. "All here in Hopetown."

Not to a grieving Rachel, not to a worried Frank, not to a maelstrom of hissing hunters - he didn't want to give you to anyone. Gojo hoped you would understand his selfish desire. "Let's go home then, 'kay?" he whispered and, stunned by the church bells and the beating of his own heart, he kissed you shyly on the temple - your very first kiss. 

You washed away today - all the water running down the drain, taking the dust, sweat, anger, and pain with it. You tried not to disturb your mental equilibrium, and one way to maintain it was with a routine. After smearing moisturizers on your body and applying balm to your hair, you wrapped yourself in a robe and stood in front of the dresser with your clothes. Gojo wanted you to open up - it was time to start somewhere. 

You had no idea what was waiting for you on the floor above. You'd agreed to just watch something, but Gojo was running around the kitchen trying to make a quick meal. He's already gotten it into his head that you're an omnivore. Maybe there were some exceptions like boiled carrots or something, but he didn't like those things too, which meant you'd find something to your liking from all the things he'd quickly cooked and panic-bought at an unknown store - in his state of chaos, Gojo didn't even realize where he'd teleported to. Garlic croutons, mozzarella cheese balls, baked shrimp in bacon, nachos with chili sauce, a few chocolate bars - cholesterol plaques. Everything just the way you liked it. "Well... Acceptable," he muttered, eyeing the edibles.

"What is it?" you asked, peering out from behind his forearm. Gojo didn't even jump - he was used to living in this house with the thought that you could be behind him at any moment. He was ready for anything. Or he thought so until he turned around. 

You were wearing regular pajama pants. Avocado, kitten, funny writing, or solid colors - he'd seen them all. But instead of the usual closed shirt, you were wearing a top. A little stretched and faded, but it hid almost nothing. "Uh," you drawled uncertainly, noticing the lost expression on Gojo's face. "Is something wrong?" you took a step back.  

Gojo had long suspected what was under your clothes, and his suspicions were confirmed. Scars of all kinds - sunken, bumpy, torn, and stretched - adorned your skin, layered on top of each other. The whitish-pink indentations on your wrists were like bracelets, and your throat was covered with many thin tightened cuts, like a dried bloody necklace.  

That wasn't what Gojo was interested in. He knew that if he gave it a single thought, he would be consumed by rage, which was good only in battle and only if it was cold. However, in helpless rage one could only find the road to self-defeat. Anyway, a trigger clicked quietly in his head.   

Kill them all.

"N-no, it's okay," Gojo mumbled, averting his eyes in embarrassment. Your naked arms, shoulders, collarbones, and neck - it made it seem as if you'd exposed more than just a part of your body. "Y-you just- uh," he panted quietly and tried to brush away the unruly white strands that tickled his burning face with his hands. "You took me by surprise," he mumbled awkwardly, raising his eyes to you again.

"Well, I just wish I could wear something like that sometimes too. At least in your workroom," you shrugged. "When I told ya ya could sleep over sometimes, I didn't think ya'd end up living there," you chuckled, not noticing how the man in front of you was being pulled further and further into the abyss by the shame.

"Sorry, I- Uh, I-I just...," Gojo kept stammering like a flustered teenager, and his hands couldn't find their place - he was trying to shove them into his pockets, then cross them over his chest, then fix his hair again. "I'm sorry, I didn't even think of that," he admitted timidly. 

"Nothing, it's fine," you smiled, seeing his condition. "If it bothered me too much, I'd tell ya about it, so... Let's just take it all to the TV," you suggested, pointing to the food. Gojo nodded, and you walked over to the dining table. Seeing several bars of chocolate, you looked dumbfounded. "God," you whimpered. "Wait here. I forgot something." 

You had no right to do that. He'd been through too much emotion that day, and this waiting during your sudden outburst only made him more anxious. He tried to rub his face with his hands to get the red paint off it or to cool it down a little, but it was in vain. Even his hands were burning.

Gojo was eager to get everything ready. He moved all the food to the coffee table, fluffed all the pillows on the couch, brought a couple of blankets, turned on the TV and searched for a movie, but nothing worked. He was still in a panic. 

"Here," you drawled uncertainly, rising from the workroom and walking over to him, sitting on the couch and tapping his foot against the floor. "It's hardly tasty, so...," you bit your lip, holding out the chocolate bar to him. "Just a souvenir from the void," you chirped, flopping onto the couch and tucking your legs under you.   

Gojo stared dumbly at the bar of chocolate in the weathered wrapper - it had been pink, but there was no lettering or logo. Did you think of him?  Was there really room in your head for him in the midst of the cold and the demons, the half-dead people and the unknown? When you were all alone and didn't know how to get out? "I won't eat it, I guess," he said weakly, though he tried to smile slyly.

"Prissy," you snorted, grabbing the nearest pillow and throwing it at him. "Crank up TV."

You've seen several movies, but Gojo didn't understand any of them. The plot, the acting, the locations - he couldn't remember any of it, even though he was staring straight at the screen. Thoughts were rushing around in his head, and his side vision was emphasizing you. You were eating with an envious appetite on whatever he'd cooked or bought, which made him bury his face harder into the pillow he was cradling against his chest. Was it fair that you were so comfortable around him? Was he the only one in this room with a heart that was out of place?    

"That's it," you sighed tiredly, stretching. "I'm full and I can't move," you said, throwing the pillow on the couch and flopping down on it, keeping your legs tucked in so you wouldn't disturb Gojo. 

Okay, it may have been unfair, but it was rarely otherwise in this world. He made that decision on his own. If you were knocked out and made to run away by his attempts to get closer to you, he was willing to back off, but just one step back. No further. Everything was fine as long as you let him stay by your side in this room, on the same couch, eating mozzarella cheese balls he'd made.

"Hey," you poked your foot gently into his thigh. "You're falling asleep," you said, watching his eyelids slip shut. "At least lie down." 

Gojo glanced sleepily at the door; he didn't want to go down to the workroom. He sighed tiredly and lay down behind you. In a strangely familiar habit, he put his arm around your waist - your back was pressed against his chest. "Mochi," Gojo whispered gently into your shoulder, realizing it was time for a risky endeavor. "Look, this might seem weird to you, but... Is it just me or are you and Rachel not getting along?" 

He furrowed his brows at his own insolence, though he hadn't been bothered by those devils pulling his tongue before. You remained silent, stroking the back of his hand with your thumb, an action that made him relax a little. "We fight with her a lot," you finally uttered. "Nothing out of the ordinary."

"I just heard something I wasn't supposed to hear," he admitted honestly. "She said things like, uh... It's not like a common fight."

"She rarely watches her tongue," a shaky exhale escaped you, and Gojo, burrowing deeper into your neck, tried with all his might to show he was there for you. "Rachel, she's... She's not the bad person. It was just a bad day, that's all," he felt you squeeze his hand harder as if you were trying to hold him in place. "Besides... She has a right to be mad at me." 

He squeezed your hand in response. "Why?"

"I killed her husband."

You sat in the huge wooden barn, surrounded by sleeping cattle. The thin hay stung your skin even through your clothes, but you didn't dare move; you sat obediently as you had been told. The strong wind made the barn door wobble as if it were about to swing open. Nothing could be heard outside, only the long whistle of the night air through the cracks.

You tried irritably to wipe the dried blood off your hands, your skin itching and aching in places as you tried so hard to get rid of the scarlet liquid. With the quiet sleepy snorting of the animals and the shoving of another straw away from you, you wondered angrily. What had gone wrong? Where had you miscalculated? And where the fuck did Frank go?

No matter how fast or slow the time dragged on, he was already late. Did he really think that if he told you to sit still and keep your nose clean, he could disappear as long as he wanted?  

As irritation began to turn to frustration, the barn door swung open, banging loudly against the wall. "Shit," mumbled Frank to the howling wind that blew in. He examined the door, and making sure it was still on its hinges, closed it back with force.

You immediately jumped to your feet, approaching him. "Well? How bad is it?" you worried.

He put his arm around your shoulders, forcing you back into the haystack and sat down beside you. The stack immediately sagged, nearly flattening to the floor. "I'm not gonna lie. It's pretty bad," Frank admitted on an exhale.

"Hunters?"

"There's less than half of them left."

"And the people?" you asked hopefully.

"Everyone was slaughtered," Frank reported grimly, patting you comfortingly on the knee.

"Wonderful," you said desolately. "They were the first people we brought out of the void, and for what? So that a couple weeks later they could just be killed?"

"It's okay," the man put his arm around you, and noticing the deep cut on your eyebrow, touched it - dark lines immediately began to tighten it. "The important thing is that we're still alive."

"What... What's up with the plantation?" you asked through force, expecting the worst.

Your expectations were confirmed. "Burned down along with the village," Frank said threateningly quietly. "We don't have the black orchid anymore."

You jumped to your feet again, and even Frank's heavy hand couldn't hold you in place. You started pacing from side to side, wringing your hands nervously. "That's fucking bullshit," you bellowed. "Hunters have lived there for centuries, has anyone ever attacked?" at your rhetorical question Frank still shook his head. "Then what the hell? Did someone turn us in?"

"I have no clue," the man shook his head contritely. "We'll have to think about it on a fresh head. Right now it's better to rest."

Because of your worries and the excitement of the elements of nature, you did not hear someone knocking shyly on the barn door. The guest, not waiting to be answered, opened the door themselves.

You turned around, but Frank had already managed to step forward and covered you with his back. "Oh, Noah," he exhaled, and his body relaxed. "Thanks for bailing us out," Frank said, and he wasn't so hard at covering you anymore. Peeking out from behind his shoulder, you met the worried gaze of a man who was wrapping himself more tightly in a fur vest.

"It's nothing," Noah muttered, shivering from the cold. "But you can't stay here for long," he lowered his voice conspiratorially. "Don't think I'm chasing you out of here. It's just that they... They might find out through me that you're here."

"Don't worry. We'll wait out the night and leave at dawn," the insider nodded uncertainly at Frank's assurance and took a step backward, slamming his back into the wall. The clattering pitchfork made him jump up and he stormed out of the barn. "I dunno where to go, though," he admitted aloud.

"Then you'll come to our house," you said in a voice that didn't tolerate bickering.

"I doubt the hunters would agree," grinned Frank sadly.

"Let them go to motels then. I don't care," you waved it off, settling back on the haystack. "We ain't done with that settlement yet anyway. Those people need a place to live, and without hunters, there'll be more room in the house."

"Still... The house isn't rubber, after all," the man frowned.

"We have to rebuild the village," you tried to cheer Frank up. "Somewhere on the edge of the Earth. And this time we'll have to think seriously about how to protect it."   

***

Two months had passed since the bloody incident, and you were on tenterhooks again. It was comforting to know that you weren't the only one in that state. Kyle was sitting next to you on the couch in the hallway of the infirmary. He jumped up, walking to the closed door of the chamber, and then sat back down. Involuntarily watching his fidgeting, you began to get even more nervous. Doc had never taken so long to examine a patient before; had something terrible happened to Rachel?

Your brother wouldn't stop - he would pop his head up every now and then when there was a rustling and mumbling outside the door. "Ya're not helping. Sit down," you turned to him exhaustedly as he once again got up from the couch.

You shivered as the doc's replica rushed past you. The same white coat, the same hands that clutched the clipboard and pen, only the replica never had a face. A blank canvas with no eyes, no nose, no mouth. Doc was always good at optimization, but the implementation was sometimes horrifying.

You both rose from your seats as doc left the ward and closed the door behind him. Clutching the clipboard to his chest, he stared at you over his glasses. "Congratulations," he said glumly. "She's pregnant."

"What?" you both simultaneously blurted out, and were reflections of each other - both amazed, right down to your open mouths.

"I mean, it's...," began a panting Kyle. "That's great!"

"Go to her," Doc nodded, but as you took a step toward the room, he grabbed your arm. "Not you. In my office. Now," Doc hissed and immediately rushed off in the direction of his office. You and Kyle looked at each other dazedly, and after a little while, you headed after doc.

As you closed the office door, you saw doc fidgeting with his medical records, and when he found the right one, he began to flip through the pages. "Doc, what's the matter?" you worried, watching as he began to write something down. The pen was almost tearing the paper.

"Sit down," he called out without raising his eyes. You obediently took the chair and moving it closer to the desk, sat down. "I won't beat around the bush," he tossed the medical records aside and interlocking his fingers, stared at you again. "Rachel has uterine hypoplasia. Or rather, she had uterine hypoplasia."

"Uh," you began confusedly, digging around doc's desk with your eyes, not sure why. Maybe looking for answers. "Can we use human language?"

"Undeveloped uterus," doc chided. "Specifically in her case, no bigger than this thing here," he tossed a pencil eraser under your nose. "I examined her from top to bottom just a month and a half ago, everything was the same. And now she's pregnant," he said coldly.

"She never told me anything about her disease," you said wistfully, thoughtfully twirling a pencil eraser in your hands.

"She suspected her reproductive problems, but I never told her anything about her disease," doc explained glumly. "Rob wanted kids too much, and I wanted to find a solution to that problem before I told them everything," he grimaced as he watched you put the eraser back on the table. "But the problem seems to have been solved for me."

"Couldn't ya... Ya know, recover her or something?" you suggested weakly, crossing your arms.

"I can only replicate what is already available. Not create new things," doc shook his head, tapping his fingers restlessly on the table.

"So what ya getting at?" you asked, the corners of your lips involuntarily creeping upward, and there was no way you could stop that panicked nervous smile.

Was it because of this that a few months ago you all literally drowned in blood and lifeless bodies? Was the price of all this something ephemeral, something that had not yet come into this world? You didn't want to believe it, and you hoped that none of you would say it out loud.

Doc was of a different opinion. He was always satisfied only with truth and facts, and it didn't matter what they carried with them. "If you don't believe in God, I suggest you to start," he said, leaning back in his chair. "After all, if this isn't a miracle of God, I'll laugh in the face of anyone who says it's just a coincidence."  

***

Rachel didn't have any of those weird wants - no cucumbers with chocolate, no honey and chips, no chalk - but her appetite was growing by the day. Because of her cravings, you could go to the store several times a day, only to have her tell you afterwards that she didn't want it anymore. Just like that, you were shoving now unwanted strawberries into the fridge. The container crumpled from the force you exerted, and the walls of it turned scarlet - unable to withstand such violence, the poor strawberry simply burst.

When you heard your sister's mumbling from the couch again, you spread your arms out to the sides with all your fingers together, closed your eyes, and took a couple of deep breaths to catch the slipping calm. You weren't supposed to be angry, Rachel was pregnant. This behavior was normal.

"What the hell ya doing there?" whined Rachel, peering out from behind the back of the couch. "The show's already starting."

"I'm coming," you muttered, slamming the refrigerator door shut. As soon as you sat down on the couch, she immediately laid her head on your lap, not caring at all about the way your legs were going to cramp up. Sighing, you started stroking her red curls, realizing where this was going. "Ya can't sleep on the couch forever. It's bad for your back."

"Back off," she snorted, fidgeting and tugging the blanket over her. "What can I do? Rob stinks."

"What's that he smells like?" you laughed softly.

"How should I know?" she whined for the umpteenth time this week. "He just stinks. I get nauseous around him all the time."

"Ya sure it's about the smell?" you asked casually, smirking eagerly, for which you received a hard slap on the thigh. "Ouch!" Rachel only frowned more at your exclamation and squirmed harder into a ball, not taking her eyes off the TV. "Rach... How did ya even realize ya were pregnant?"

"Well...," she drawled thoughtfully. "I got my period first. When it first start when you're thirteen it's normal, but when you're in your early twenties... I had a real panic attack," she laughed merrily, remembering her flighty state. "I thought I had vaginal cancer or something."

"Rachel," you giggled quietly along with her.

After calming down a bit, she continued. "I went to the doc right away, and he calmed me down, saying I was just menstruating. Only he was looking unkindly at my medical records. Dunno, maybe I imagined it. Just a couple weeks later, I got so sick...," she whimpered, placing a hand on her still growing belly. "I thought I had poisoned myself with something, but Rob kept following me around and insisting to take a pregnancy test. So, it just happened," she pressed her palm harder against her lower abdomen, and she could have sworn she felt another heartbeat even though her common sense screamed that it was too early for that. "Ya think I'll be a good mom?" she asked muffled, almost bashfully.

"Uh...," you drawled surreptitiously, playing with a strand of her hair. "I guess so? Actually, it depends on the kid, too. It's a matter of luck," you shrugged, trying to choose your words. "If it's a gifted child - fine, but if it's not... Well, then ya'll be scrubbing shit off the walls," you giggled, which earned you another hard slap to the knee. "That hurts!" you squeaked.

The fact that she was unaware of it was neither comfort nor relief. The deeper you went into your thoughts, the more your hands shook as if your mind were a labyrinth, its icy walls stretching to the edge of heaven, leaving no way out. You didn't know if you had to do it or if you just wanted to, but it seemed like the best solution.

Toxicosis is a terrible thing. Either a woman eats a lot and then vomits, or she eats nothing at all and still vomits. After a few trips to the bathroom with Rachel, she finally fell asleep. You carefully put a pillow under her head instead of your lap and headed to the second floor.

You didn't spend more than a minute in there. All you had to do was walk as quietly as possible past the sleeping Rob, steal his phone, and carry it into the workroom. Trifling matter, but when you got to the desk, you couldn't bring yourself to plug the phone into the computer. You felt like you were shackled, and the more you resisted, the harder the shackles dug into your skin - a familiar feeling that made you collapse helplessly into the chair.

"Need help?" the suave mechanical voice was like a nudge or just a key to all the chains for you.

"Meg," you addressed the artificial intelligence, finally plugging the cable into the computer. "Find something," you sobbed raggedly, watching as his phone lit up, announcing that the connection had been successful. "Find something that says he had nothing to do with this."

***

Vito looked at you as if you were mentally unstable. Everyone else had left to celebrate the completion of Hopetown, and you were the only one sitting in the kitchen, in absolute silence and total darkness. No garland was lit. No crickets were chirping. No cold wind rushing in.

Doc probably only told you about it because he knew Rob was Kyle's best friend. He wouldn't have been able to judge impartially, and there was no telling which evil would show its face. A desperate attempt at vindication, or a brutal, agonizing murder. "Eh," Vito sighed, wrapping elastic bandages around his legs. "I was born to drink beer, not this stuff," he glanced at you sneakily. "And why aren't ya at the party?"

"I felt sorry for ya," you joked back.

"Come on," Vito said cheerfully. "I bet next year someone else will get a shift on those dates, and I'll make up for it then."

After waiting for him to lace up his boots and put on his mask, you got up and went to see him off. When you got to the training field, the same point from which every voidrunner departed, Vito nodded, and after telling you to drink a bottle of beer for him, disappeared in a purple flash.

You walked around the place where the man had been a few seconds ago, took a dozen steps toward the forest, and turned around, leaving footprints in the snow. The clammy anticipation of the inevitable made your palms sweat. The clouds of vapor coming out of your mouth were jagged, intermittent, but not from the cold, for all you felt was desolation.

You could feel his presence, but you couldn't sense his thoughts or his moods. You ran a hundred excuses in your head for him, but none of them fit. Your gut shook more and more as he approached. Before the purple flash was even born, you covered your eyes with your hand.

Rob didn't look hurt or tired, only frantically shaking something off his sides with his hands, unaware that there was someone standing ten paces behind him. Someone with obvious motives, someone with courage and no sympathy. Perhaps if he'd paid attention to the fresh footprints, he might have been able to do something about it.

"Relocate."

There was no longer a field beneath your feet - it was a scaffold. One of your hands rested on his shoulder, and the other, clutching the dagger, was between his shoulder blades. The dagger cut the flesh silently, so your conscience was silent, too. It was very quiet. No sobs, no whimpering. Only when you twisted the dagger and pulled it sharply from Rob's heart was there a gurgling wheeze.

The man tried to turn around, but he didn't have time - his legs gave up before he could. He fell to his knees, and only after a few long moments, collapsed face first into the ground.

You'd always loved the sight of blood running down a back - a sure sign that the reaper had gone unnoticed. You watched blankly as the scarlet puddle spread beneath Rob, desecrating the pure white color, and you never realized that this was the first murder you'd ever committed that didn't make your hands tremble.

Your world froze, but everything continued to live without your participation. To the songs of the white wind under the northern sky, winter was sweeping everything away. The ground, the cooling body, the sins of the living and the dead. The only thing left untouched and naked were your bloody hands.

There were two persons in the field. One was the best friend, the father, the husband. The other was the one who took it all away. 

It was a sudden revelation that was never meant to be spoken, and Gojo froze in place, trying not to scare you away. You took it in your own way, though you tried not to think about how badly you might have spoiled his attitude toward you by telling him about your past. It was better to keep your mouth shut as it had been, and though Gojo was sometimes angry at you for it, you'd never felt like he was about to leave for good before. "Rob never had time to figure out who killed him, and Rachel never found out what happened to him," you continued to drown yourself, forgetting your sense of self-preservation. "I just told her that he never came back from the void," you were disturbed to your shaking knees by this uncertainty - Gojo still had his arm around your waist but remained motionless, you couldn't even hear his breathing above your ear. "I used to reassure myself that it was best for her, that she'd never know what he'd done or how much Mike's life really cost, but... I guess those were just pathetic excuses for a coward like me. That's all."  

"Look at me," though there was nothing commanding in his tone, his hand tugged at your waist, forcing you to turn around. "A real coward wouldn't have done anything and let it go, but not you," Gojo said, stroking your cheek soothingly. He would have given anything for you to look at him now, to feel how sincere his words were, but you only squinted your eyes harder. "I killed Megumi's father," he admitted on an exhale, and you opened your eyelids. "I'm not seeking for attention, it's just...," Gojo mumbled embarrassedly, but didn't take his palm away from your face. "It would be fair of me to admit something in return. And... Uh, he doesn't know about it either." 

"How come?" 

"It's just happened," he grinned bitterly. "He had a person to kill and I was just in the way. To be honest, he kicked my ass pretty good, but it was that bastard that made me stronger," Gojo sighed wistfully at the recollection that seemed to have faded into oblivion. "I never got to protect that person, though," he added more quietly. 

"But ya've protected many others."

"Exactly!" he brightened, burying his nose in your cheek. "So do you. Don't ever forget that, 'kay?" you nodded your head weakly, but it was enough for him. If need be, he was willing to repeat it every day, and it didn't matter that there was a chance he'd pester you to the point where you'd ban him from the workroom forever. He could have come in through the window anyway.

The annoying feeling of worrying for someone had long ago turned to trepidation, and when Gojo felt you fidget once more, there was no way he could keep another question inside him. "How long ago did you stop sleeping?" your stunned stupor made him chuckle. "It's not like I'm a blind fool. You said you were gonna sleep in the other room, but when you're home, you don't leave the workroom at all." 

You climbed under the blanket and pressed your forehead against his chest. "Ya've reached your limit of questions for today," you muttered sullenly, pouting your lips.

The only reaction he had to your behavior was tenderness. You may not have remembered it, but he'd seen you asleep once. In this very same spot, on this very same couch, which was illuminated by the light from the TV. He remembered covering a restless you with a blanket and sitting next to you all night, pretending to watch cartoons. "Come here," Gojo whispered softly into the top of your head. "Come here," taking advantage of your lack of comprehension, he rolled over onto his back, wrapped both arms around your waist, and laid you on top of him with enviable ease. His arms closed around you in case you decided to run away, even though he realized that if you wanted to disappear, you would. But you remained motionless, leaning your head against his chest. "Try to get some sleep, 'kay?"   

The song of his heart was fast and feverish, but it wasn't annoying. In the timid embrace of such a rare guest as a dream, you heard another melody, unfamiliar one. The longer this melody was played, the more embrace became tender and stronger, but did an ordinary dream know how to embrace like that? 

Gojo hummed softly to himself, hardly saying any words. It was a muffled melody, and he doubted you could hear it. Either way, you began to fidget less and to raise your head less often, looking around the space with a blurred gaze. "Shh," he hushed quietly as you jumped up once more and gently returned your head back to his chest. "It turns out you're snuffling. You knew that?" after all, he had already kissed you once, would it make it worse if he did it again? Gojo didn't remember himself as his lips covered everything they could reach with tender kisses. "My baby," he whispered softly, touching with his lips the spreading black lines on your forehead. "You're so beautiful," he breathlessly babbled nonsense into your blackened hair and smiled foolishly, but his face changed immediately as if someone was trying hard to take you away from him. "I'll always be there for you. I promise."  

You were pushed from side to side as if you weighed nothing, but it wasn't anyone's fault. There were more people in the bar this time, but everyone was still as drunk and happy as ever. When you heard the threatening creak, you unconsciously bounced. An old wooden sign fell where you had just been standing. A cheeky hooting sounded, profanity was heard everywhere, and a bottle smashed against the wall a few feet away. You ducked as if you were in a battlefield and headed for the familiar staircase.

It was still the same fog of cigarette smoke, but it was a lot calmer. Maybe it was the quiet people who gathered here or maybe it was the influence of the sullen-looking bartender. He was still polishing the glasses.

No one was interested in anyone here. When you walked in, not a single head turned in your direction. The people here were happy in their own way, and they didn't care about anyone else. "Sunshine!" a joyful, familiar voice called out to you.

When you looked over, you saw Kyle sitting at a round table. He had a glass of light beer in front of him, and judging by his blissful look, it wasn't his first glass. He was surrounded by painfully familiar faces, but that pain carried with it only surprise. Vito was slyly pouring more alcohol into Kyle's glass, and your brother's shoulder was gripped tightly by a man's hand. Rob sat next to him, encouraging them both.

"Hey guys," you smiled, taking a seat across from them.

"Hey! Why ya sitting so far away?" whined Kyle drunkenly, holding out his arms to you. "Come here!" you looked at this picture through your fingers. Shifting your gaze to Rob, you saw him raise his eyebrows guiltily.  

"I see ya two are best friends again?" you asked snidely, pulling Kyle's beer glass to you. Kyle was drunk, but he was able to focus and send you a questioning look, even though you thought his eyes were about to drift apart.

"All right, lad, let's go bring ya to your senses," Vito announced businesslike, lifting Kyle by the shoulders in one jerk.

"Oh my," you said meaningfully, watching as Vito dragged Kyle's collapsed body on his back. "It's not even a day later, and he's already on a roll."

"He's been looking out for ya all his life," Rob reminded you, laughing. "He's long overdue for a rest," he sighed as the door to the restroom slammed shut behind the men. An awkward silence hung. You had a lot to say to each other, and only one of you needed the courage to start. "Ya mad?" asked Rob quietly, looking into your eyes.

"No," you replied simply, shaking your head and pressing your lips together. "I'm not."

"Ya didn't tell him?" he nodded his head in the direction of the restroom.

"Kyle's not stupid. I think he figured it all out on his own."

"I just...," he began tentatively, and all his movements seemed awkward, embarrassed. Rob scratched the back of his head thoughtfully before continuing. "I just want ya to know. I don't regret anything."

"Yep," you chirped, sipping from Kyle's glass and immediately grimaced. You sighed heavily, wanting as soon as possible to say goodbye forever to the feeling that made your soul clench into a helpless lump. "Me too."

"That's your style," Rob laughed and immediately relaxed. He leaned back in his chair, crossing his legs. "How's... How's my baby boy?"

"Mike is fine. He's nothing like ya," you stated, wrinkling your nose. "Not in looks, not in personality."

"It's for the best," he said, raising his glass as if his words were a toast. Taking a sip from the glass, Rob set it back on the table with a thud. "And how's my wife?"

"She is okay," you lied, shrugging indifferently. "Ya know her. She can handle anything."

"Oh yeah," he drawled meaningfully, stretching and putting his hands on the back of his head. "I never thanked ya," he started laughing softly again, and you realized what he was getting at.

"Kyle brought ya two together, not me," you tried unsuccessfully to remind him, but Rob was already flying in his memories.

"He just gave me her number and some idiotic advice," he waved it off carelessly. "And ya," he literally jabbed his finger at you. "Ya're the one who told me to bring a bouquet of garlic bread and dried squid instead of flowers on our first date," you clucked your tongue and involuntarily hid half your face in your palms, hoping he'd get your sign and not continue. "And how she chased it all with beer, mmm," he thought blissfully, closing his eyes. "I was all gone," he chuckled again. "Here comes our drunk," he announced, nodding toward a sobered Kyle.

He looked like he was being dragged to trial. His face was still wet and red, and he clutched his clenched hands to his chest with all his might. "I'm sorry," he said quietly to you, sitting down next to you. "I forgot myself a little," he stared guiltily at the table, not daring to look you in the eye.

"You deserve it," you reminded him, shoving him gently with your shoulder. Suddenly, on cue, a thought popped into your head as if your mind was a jewelry box and someone had just put a piece of jewelry in there. "By the way, Kyle," you chirped, reaching into your pocket with your hand. You didn't take it with you, you didn't even think about it, so why did you have it? "Ya left something," you said, holding out a silver bracelet to him.

"Oh shit!" worried Kyle, taking the jewelry from your hands and placing it on his wrist. "I thought it was gone forever..."

"Don't lose it anymore," you jokingly chastised him.

"Thank ya," he wrapped his arms around you and began kissing your face, and you wrinkled unhappily at the touch of wet black strands against your skin.

When he was done with his affection, you unceremoniously pushed the beer glass away from him. You decided to stay out of the men's conversations and musings - they'd been gone too long already. You'd heard stories about their first dates, their first fights, and there seemed to be some generational difference between Vito, Kyle and Rob.

Kyle wouldn't be himself if he hadn't noticed your state of mind even in the midst of a cheerful conversation. He could see your desperate gaze circling the bar, searching for someone. "Sunshine...," he began, taking your hand. "I'm sorry, but she's not coming tonight."

"I thought so."

You're just now noticing that there's been music playing in the bar the whole time. Quiet, but energetic. You only realized this because your brother looked playfully into your eyes. "Shall we dance?"

"Kyle, I can't dance," you protested weakly, flinching away.

"Just a twitch, then," he chuckled, taking you under the arm and pulling you from the table.

There wasn't a single person here dancing. Maybe they didn't know it was allowed or maybe they just didn't want to. Either way, no one paid any attention to you. Everything merged in your clumsy movements, and did so tightly that it ceased to exist at all. You forgot what happened yesterday and didn't know what would happen tomorrow, the only thing that mattered to you now was Kyle dancing and laughing right in front of you. He was alive and whole, and no one tore him apart. He still loved and supported you even when you failed.

The two of you, panting and red, Kyle from the exertion and you from the embarrassment, didn't notice as the bar began to empty. People lingered here for a long time, but they left quickly one by one, and now there were empty tables all around you. "Okay, that's it," he put his arm around your shoulders, trying to catch his breath. Kyle saw Rob and Vito already getting ready, slipping their jackets over their shoulders. "Sunshine," he whispered, looking into your eyes confused. "I'm sorry. But we really have to go."

"It's okay," you cheered him up. "I understand everything. Go."

He pulled you hard against him, but at this point, you couldn't feel how much love he actually put into it. "See ya," Kyle whispered into the top of your head, and he could barely pull away from you as if every inch between you was causing him a tremendous amount of pain.

"See ya," you said after him.

The same bartender was still sullenly going about his work as if he had an endless supply of dirty glasses under the bar. When all the door bells rang out, you looked around and realized you were alone in that corner bar again.

The crackle of burning wood in the fireplace and the smell of smoldering timber brought calmness, one of the few states of mind available to them. Not discerning day or night, sun or moon, love or hate, but only pretending to know everything around them, these creatures sat in corners, in shadows, trying to sort out their own affairs. "It's time to stir up the hornet's nest."

Rei reluctantly raised his head. "Hm?" he lazily uttered, examining the ceiling of the room as if the person speaking was sitting there. "If you meant kill them all, there's a different expression for that. You should be around people more often," Rei stuck back into the fashion magazine and slid the whiskey glass closer to him.

"Who has access to the repository with the artifact?" the creature asked, ignoring the barbed remarks.  

"Frank and his kids," Rei replied nonchalantly, admiring the model's sultry skin on one of the pages. He ran his finger across the page. Why instead of a soft smooth texture he didn't feel even a pitiful semblance?

"How fortunate you killed the lad," the creature hissed

"Do I hear sarcasm in your voice?" grinned Ray, looking up again. "Oh, come on," he laughed, grabbing a glass of whiskey, the ice rattling as if it were afraid. "You're the one who advised me to watch out for the redheaded girl. We didn't need the lad. He just got in the way."

"Any luck finding anything out?"

"Nope," Rei muttered, pouting his lips demonstratively. "Her only weaknesses are alcohol and sex. I like her, by the way," a smile slowly formed on his face, and he turned back to the model. Rather, to her sultry skin.

"You can't be entrusted with anything at all," the creature disappointed, and the glass the demon clutched in his hand crackled. The thin glass shattered into hundreds of small shards, but never broke. "We need someone with powers of observation."

Taking a couple deep breaths, Rei came to his senses. "Stop underestimating me. Even if we did have it, the town is protected by relics," he said irritably, carefully setting the glass aside. "They only protect it from demons and dark energy, though. No one said anything about the rest," the indignation was replaced by a mad chuckle so quiet and short it could penetrate anywhere. Under the skin, under the bones, into the heart.

"Is there someone in mind?"

"Yeah, kinda," Rei chirped, wiggling his leg flirtatiously. Maybe he should have done it for nothing because every movement of that body created an rage in him that he couldn't get rid of. The more he spat it out, the harder he let it out, the more it came back to him. There was only one thing that could do it all.

"You're still not happy about something."  

"Give me one good reason why I should stay in this body or I'll change it immediately," he bellowed, tugging on a shirt that was twice his size.

"Have you tried working out?" the voice suggested sincerely and courteously. "They say it builds muscle."

"Why don't I start eating fucking porridge in the morning too?" Rei clenched his teeth in anger, pitching forward.

"You can't change your body right now," the creature warned. The glass, already battered and hitherto standing peaceful on the table, burst. "Your date hasn't happened yet. She needs to see this," there was a huge upside to each creature seeing and hearing what the other creature saw and heard. At least, if it wasn't hiding. Rei moaned quietly, pitifully in pleasure as he saw your image through the prism of the one who spoke to him. "Calm down. It'll be a while yet, but until then... You need to stay in this body. If you hate it so much... I think you could change it a bit."

"That's right," he said cheerfully, taking off his glasses and breaking them in half. Only one small detail remained. Grabbing the shears from the table and going to the mirror, Rei cut off a long black braid in one motion.

next ⊳

[spacebread-7]

Thinking about the agents, more specifically how (almost) all of them are thoroughly traumatized in some way because of the Squidbreak Splatoon.

Spoilers and a very long HC post below the cut

Ok so obv Callie and Marie had the pressure of being idols since they were young, which couldn't have been healthy. Not to mention the entirety of splatoon 2 where Callie was taken and brainwashed by Octavio, Marie having to literally jfk her own cousin to save her, the amount of trauma these two have been through have been rough. S3 didn't help either with the whole "I just sent a 15 year old into space" thing going on, along with the stress of Gramps nearly fucking dying on them??? Their only calm after EVERYTHING that happened was finally winning a splatfest together, and that was grandfest. It took over a decade for them to finally be happy.

Craig didn't have it too great either. His whole gay beef with Octavio resulting in the Great Turf War and recruiting his (as far as we know) only family to help him fight??? That right there was a losing battle (3 v 100000+) and it only gets worse. Mf has firsthand dealt with so much in his lifespan, I'm shocked he's still hanging around. He trained Agent 3 and went with them to fight on multiple occasions, braced the Deepsea Metro with 8 and nearly got fucking blended in the process, got turned into a freeze-dried fruit loop after Mr Grizz got his paws on him after he met Neo 3 and hell, I'm sure he's had to help Agent 4 at some point, too. Bro has been through so much and he still managed to stay positive somehow???? He made amends with Octavio after the S3 storymode and they sit together at grandfest like old pals! Craig deserves the fucking world, even if he's a senile old man.

And the agents. Oh boy the agents. Cap'n 3 has seen it all. From fighting Octavio on multiple fronts, getting fucked up and sanitized by Tartar and forced to fight 8, taking Craig's place as Captain, watching the newbie go into FUCKING SPACE???? It's no wonder they don't talk in S3. And you can make the argument that it's because they were once the player character, but I view it as Cap'n 3 is so tired, they just don't want to talk most of the time. And I don't blame them one bit. They've grown up in the Squidbreak Splatoon only knowing to face danger head-on, and when the time came for them to take a seat, they had to get back up again immediately. I just wish after the S3 storymode, they finally got a nap or something.

Agent 4 is by far one of the most forgotten in the NSS. Only Marie really knows her, and even then, doesn't say much to her. 4 had to go on a whole expedition (in the height of the war, mind you) to go rescue Callie FROM BEHIND ENEMY LINES. And they fought rough. I don't doubt that 4 has some serious trauma from both being overlooked the entire time and from being a little kid forced to fight for their life. And they weren't even fighting for themselves. Their entire mission is just to save Callie. Homegirl probably didn't give a FUCK considering the most hyped group at the time was OTH. And the worst part is that we never hear about what happened to her after the mission! She's never brought up again! The closest we get is the enemy bosses in Side Order, and that's (once again) 4 being exploited, if that even is her!! Someone give this girl a hug!!

Agent 8 has truly seen better days. Girl is an ex-Octarian soldier who's seeking freedom and doesn't know not to trust the metro. All she knew was that her friends went that way and never came back, so it's logical to think that it was an escape route. To this day I have no fucking clue how gramps got onto the metro but I feel bad for 8 because if I was stuck in an empty train for an undetermined amount of time with some Eminem-wannabe-80-year-old, I'd believe Tartar too. Also CQ-Cumber was kind of a dick to 8 the entire time, pushing her to go through the ENTIRE metro just to find the "thangs", which she never got an explanation for until Tartar combined them and TRIED TO FUCKING BLEND HER ALIVE WITHOUT WARNING. The only reason she's still alive is because 3 came to help, and Tartar took her and turned her against 8 too! Girly can't catch a break! The only thing you get from beating that fight is a toothpick, by the way, so 8 is literally just being beat while she's down. On the other hand, after being rescued, she has to go with OTH and Gramps to not only save 3 but stop Tartar from NUKING THE EARTH?! THIS OCTO NEEDS SOME THERAPY AND SHE NEEDS IT NOW. But even after Octo Expansion, she can't even rest because of Side Order!!!! Give her a goddamn break, Nintendo! Damn!

And last but certainly not least, Neo 3 and Little Buddy. Yes I'm including Little Buddy, he's an agent in my heart. Anyway. This chick was literally minding her own business in Splatsville, having just moved there given by her clothes at the start of the game, and yoink! no time for having fun and, you know, living, when the NSS needs new agents! I love how unserious Neo is the entire time because she just Does. Not. Give. A Fuck. About anything Craig is yapping about! With the help of Little Buddy, she beats the SHIT out of Octavio, traverses the entirety of Alterna, whooping all of Deep Cut's asses in the process, dragging random garbage pieces back to base for Cap'n to figure out what to do with them. And the best part? The entire time they're doing this, she's just doing it to feed Little Buddy. Bro is hungry and only fuzzy ooze can suffice, and luckily Alterna is COVERED in that shit. He's fed and happy, Neo is slaying, life is good, but all that hits the fan when Mr Grizz reveals near-dead Grandpa and you what this absolute unit of an inkling does? She doesn't give a fuck, that's what! She just stands there like "bro deserved it for snatching me off the street"! An icon! She also looks excited to go to space! And seeing the people she beat up (Deep Cut, Octavio) turn around and help her??? That has gotta be huge for her. While she's up there in space, Little Buddy goes fucking Super Saiyan at the first three notes of Calamari Inkantation and turns into a FUCKING BEHEMOTH that absolutely DOGSHITS on Grizz and saves the world! They're both iconic and unbothered in the slightest and I love that for both of them.

To make a long post short, everyone in the NSS needs extensive therapy. Except Neo. She was too busy serving cunt the entire time to be traumatized.

[parmawiolets]

Fruit Salad

Eddie Munson x fem!reader

Summary: Eddie Munson's ex-not-quite-girlfriend Hannah Newby is pregnant. But it's not his. And she won't say whose it is. Very slow burn. Exes to friends to (eventual) lovers.

A/N: Chapter 2 of my first ever fic! Still not really sure why I decided to do such a big project for my first, but I'm enjoying it! Again, thank you soooo much to @shybunnie20 for being absolutely wonderful and helping me so much. Definitely go check out her work, she's amazing.

Contents: No upside down. Pregnancy. Fluff and angst. Reader is called Hannah because I didn't want to use Y/N but no physical description of reader (so maybe an OC? I don't know). Bob is her dad, because I love him. The Byers are still in Hawkins because I love them too.

Word count: 5.1K

Previous chapter

Chapter 2: Blueberry

Flashback to Hannah finding out she is pregnant. Lots of fluff, some angst.

July 4th, 1985 - 7 weeks pregnant

— 

Jules is worried about Hannah.

Hannah has been nauseous for over a month. And more irritable than usual. If Jules thinks back on it, it's also been a while since Hannah has complained of cramps. 

Jules thinks she knows what's going on. She just doesn't know how to broach it with Hannah.

—

Jules is standing in the feminine hygiene section of Melvad's, pretending to mull over two different boxes of tampons, waiting for the other woman in the aisle to just leave already. How long does it take to choose a deodorant?

The woman finally seems to decide and shuffles away to a different part of the store. In a flash, Jules is where she wants to be.

Shit.

Why are there so many different ones?

Does it make a difference?

Jules quickly looks around to check the coast is still clear, and opts for the second cheapest. She gets two. Just to be sure.

She struggles to hold the boxes conspicuously, so dashes back to where she had been standing and grabs a box of tampons to hold in front. No one's going to look too close at that.

Jules makes her way to the end of the aisle and peeks around the corner. Hannah's dad's girlfriend is working one of the tills. Jules knows Hannah likes her, and she seems to keep out of the small town gossip. Jules hasn't taken her driving test yet, so she can't get to the next town over on her own. This is her best bet at discretion.

"Hi Joyce." Jules puts down her purchases; tampon box on top, and reaches for a brown paper bag.

"Oh, hi sweetie." Joyce starts scanning. "How are-" Joyce's eyes snap to Jules' as she picks up the second item. Joyce clears her throat. "How are you doing?" She quickly scans the offending items and reaches over and drops them in the bag.

"Oh, um, yeah, you know." Jules grimaces at her stuttering.

"Mmhm." Joyce gives Jules her total, and takes the money offered.

"How about you?" Jules attempts a smile.

"I'm good, sweetie. Thank you." Joyce takes Jules' hand as she gives back the change and drops her voice. "You let me know if you need anything, ok?"

Jules nods her head quickly, giving a weak smile, and dashes out the door. "Bye, Joyce." 

She runs all the way to Hannah's house.

—

"I thought it would be fun!"

Hannah eyes Jules skeptically and deadpans, "You thought it would be fun."

"Yeah!" Jules grimaces, forcing out a laugh. "Who hasn't always wanted to pee on a stick, right?"

Hannah slowly raises her hand. "Uh… me?"

"Come on, it will be great!" Jules grabs her by the arm and starts pulling her towards the bathroom.

"Jules! What? No!" Hannah pulls her arm from her friend's grasp. "What's going on? Are you ok?" Her eyes widen. "Oh god, do you think you're-"

"No! I think you are!" Jules slaps her hand over her mouth. "Shit. I'm sorry. There was definitely a better way to do this, but I'm panicking now. You've been nauseous and more grumpy than usual and you haven't complained about cramps in ages."

Hannah is frozen. Staring straight ahead with a look of pure horror on her face.

"Han, please don't freak out." She reaches out and takes Hannah's hand. "Not yet anyway." She laughs weakly.

Five minutes later, the two girls are sat on the bathroom floor, shoulders pressed together, leaning against the bath. Hannah is hugging her legs with her forehead on her knees.

"How much longer?" 

"30 seconds."

Jules' hand is circled around Hannah's ankle in an attempt to comfort. She doesn't want to overwhelm her, but wants her to know she's not alone. She gives it a squeeze. "Times up." Jules is whispering. "Do you want me to look?" 

Hannah takes a deep breath and leans her head back. "No, I can do it." She picks up the stick, not looking at it. "What am I looking for again?"

"Two lines means pregnant."

Hannah scrunches her eyes closed and takes another deep, steadying breath. She opens her eyes and sees two lines staring back at her.

—

Jules is still worried about Hannah. She hasn't spoken in nearly half an hour. The pair are lying side by side on Hannah's bedroom floor, hands linked between them. 

Jules tests the waters by squeezing Hannah’s hand. Hannah crushes hers in response.

“Han, I need you to tell me what you need. Do you want to stay like this for a while, or do you want a hug? Or a cry, maybe? Food?”

Hannah lets out a shuddering breath and tears slip out down her temples. 

“Do you want me to call your dad? Or, um, Eddie?”

Hannah groans. “I’m supposed to go to the carnival with Eddie tonight. We were going to watch the fireworks from the ferris wheel.”

“That sounds nice.” Jules likes Eddie. Likes him for Hannah. She’s watched Hannah grow comfortable around him, which is rare for her. Hannah finds it difficult to let people in and let them see her vulnerable side. Jules has relished watching Hannah’s irritation at Eddie worming his way past her defences. She always worried that Hannah would push away anyone good for her, for fear of getting hurt. Eddie's determined though, and he’s good for her.

“Shit!” Hannah shoots up with a look of horror on her face. 

“Shit, what? Han, what?”

Hannah stares at her best friend, her eyes filling with more tears. “I don’t know whose it is.”

Jules freezes for half a second, then springs into action, scrambling to her feet. “Ok, we can definitely figure this out. We’re just talking about the two guys, right?”

Hannah nods, yes.

“Did they overlap at all?”

Hannah shakes her head, no.

“When was your last period? And any missed ones.”

Hannah rushes over to the calendar on her wall and flips through it, looking for the last time she drew a little star on a date. “I’ve missed two periods. A week and a half ago, and the month before that.”

“And how long have you been sleeping with Eddie?”

“Less than a month.” Hannah’s face falls. Tears spill from her eyes again. “Fuck,” she whispers. “Fuck, this just got so much worse.”

Jules pulls her into a tight hug. “No, hey, no we’re gonna figure this out, right? It’s all going to be fine. I’ve got you, ok?” Her own eyes are welling up now, the worry she was feeling earlier is nothing compared to now. “There’s options, right? You don’t need to do anything you don’t want to, but I will be here whatever you decide.” She pulls back and holds Hannah by her shoulders. “Ok?”

Hannah sniffs and wipes her cheeks. “I can’t think about any of that right now.”

Jules tucks a lock of hair behind Hannah’s ear. “You don’t have to.”

“I need to- Shit. I need…” Hannah buries her face in her hands and her voice comes out muffled. “I need to break it off with Eddie.”

Jules’ heart breaks for her best friend. “Are you sure? You can wait, if you want to. Since you don’t even know if you’re keeping it yet. I know how much you like him.”

Hannah shakes her head. “No, I don’t want him involved when he doesn’t have to be.” She rubs at her eyes. “I don’t want him to feel like the bad guy if he doesn't want anything to do with me; or, god, feel some weird obligation to be with me.” Hannah drops down onto the edge of her bed. “If I decide to… y’know, then I’ll talk to him about it. But not before I know what I’m doing.”

Jules sits next to her and takes her hand again.

Hannah sniffs. “And there’s no way I could avoid him until then if I don’t. The boy would just break down my door if I tried to dodge his calls.” She lets out a watery chuckle.

Jules smiles sadly. “You really like him, huh.”

“Yeah,” Hannah huffs. “It’s gross.”

—

Wayne Munson is getting himself ready to go to work when there’s a knock at his trailer door. He finishes tugging on his worn work boots and puts an unlit cigarette between his lips before stomping over and opening the door.

His gruff, furrowed face brightens immediately upon seeing Hannah standing nervously on the other side. “Hannah, darlin’. Come on in.” Wayne turns to the side and swaps places with her. “I was just heading out. Ed’s in his room, so just head on through.” 

Wayne lights his cigarette as he watches Hannah look warily into the trailer. She’s often quiet, and a little prickly sometimes; Wayne thinks she’s a little like him in that way. But right now, she just seems anxious.

“You alright darlin’?”

Hannah’s wide eyes turn to him. “Mmhm.”

“Well, like I said, you just head on back. Let Ed know I’ve left for work, will you?”

Hannah nods. “Yeah, sure.”

He eyes Hannah again, unconvinced. But he has to get to work. Wayne raises his cigarette in a wave and shuts the door behind him, leaving Hannah alone in the quiet room.

Hannah takes a moment to steady herself. She looks around the snug trailer. She loves this place. It’s always so homey and welcoming. The Munsons clearly take care of their home and their belongings. Everything is well loved and well kept. 

It’s at least a full minute before she moves again, toeing off her shoes and creeping down the small hallway towards Eddie’s bedroom door. She doesn’t want to alert him to her presence yet. She wants to delay what she came to do for as long as she can. Hannah knows she should do it, knows it’s the right thing to do. But she wants to be selfish. She wants to indulge in Eddie and live in denial for a little while longer.

“Eds?” Hannah’s voice is soft as she pushes the door open, peering into the dimly lit room.

The main light is switched off, the blinds closed. The only light in the room comes from the small lamp on the cluttered desk that Eddie is hunched over, headphones over his ears and Hannah can hear the deafening blast of whatever music he is listening to. Eddie’s hair is tucked behind his ears to allow for the foam pads from his walkman. Even from her angle, he looks adorable. She longs to run her hands through his hair; twirl a spiral of it around her finger; pull at it and hear him moan. A muscle by his shoulder blade twitches as he furiously scribbles at a drawing. Hannah is itching to run her hands over his sinewy back and drape herself over his shoulders. She wants to wrap herself around him. Surround herself with him and never leave.

But she can’t bring herself to.

Instead, Hannah shuffles towards him and walks two fingers across his shoulder before laying her palm on it when he jumps, whipping off his headphones and turning in his chair.

“Hi Eds,” she lets out in a breath.

“Sweetheart!”

Hannah winces at his shout.

“Shit,” Eddie looks around. “Am I late? Wait, did you walk here? I'm supposed to come and pick you up. Jesus Christ, how late am I?!"

Hannah turns Eddie's chair to fully face her and moves between his spread legs. She puts both hands on his shoulders and squeezes, digging her thumbs into the dips in his collarbones. "You're ok, I'm early." Her voice is still soft despite Eddie's volume.

Eddie's voice joins hers in a murmur. "Well, shit, sweetheart." He takes one of her hands from his shoulder and holds it to his chest, massaging his thumb into her palm. "You should have called, I would've picked you up early if you wanted." 

She shrugs. "I wanted to walk. It's still light out." 

Hannah turns her attention to his desk, eyeing the drawings splayed across the surface.

"Did you want to go early? The fireworks aren't for a few hours yet, but we can go and look around for a while if you want."

She shakes her head. 

Hannah’s hand moves from Eddie’s shoulder to drift over his drawings. A vicious, sharp-toothed mermaid; a snarling, fire breathing dragon; a grotesque zombie, flesh dripping from its bones. 

“These are really good, Eds.”

The tops of Eddie’s ear burn red and he grins bashfully. “Thanks Han.” He kisses her captive hand. “Got nothing on you though.”

Hannah frowns. “Don’t do that.” She pinches his bicep, causing Eddie to yelp.

Eddie studies her for a moment, she seems off. "You ok?" He reaches up and takes her chin between his forefinger and thumb, skimming her chin with the pad. 

This is when she should tell him. She should break it off now. It's the right thing to do.

Eddie can see that Hannah's eyes have glazed over; she's gone somewhere else in her mind. Eddie stands up and cups her shoulders, bringing her attention back to him.

"Listen, I know you really wanted to go to this thing tonight," He's lying, they both know it. It was him that suggested it. "But I'm pretty beat. Would it be ok if we stayed in and watched movies? We could order a pizza and just veg out."

She shouldn't. It’s selfish.

"Yeah, ok."

—

As Eddie opens the fridge to grab two sodas, he peers into the living room at Hannah settling on one end of the couch. He can tell something is up, but he knows better by now than to press. They’re still getting to know each other, but after hooking up for several weeks, Eddie knows he needs to warm her up when she gets like this. If he lays too much affection on her too quickly, she’ll freeze up and push him away. 

Hannah is squirming on the couch trying to get comfortable. She slouches in the seat, then sits up straight, then crosses her legs. She’s wriggled between at least five different positions by the time she looks up and realises Eddie is standing next to the couch and watching her with an amused expression. 

“Comfy?”

Her face flushes and she nods sheepishly. Hannah tucks her legs underneath her and sits still. 

Eddie puts the cans and some napkins down on the small table in front of them and sits down beside her. He leaves a small space between them, but takes one of her hands in both of his and holds it to his chest. He can see that Hannah is still stuck in her head. Eddie hums a soft melody and runs one calloused palm back and forth along her forearm, kneading with his fingertips. 

He watches Hannah’s face carefully for her reaction. She blinks a few times, coming back to herself, and looks over at Eddie, resting her head against the couch cushion. 

Eddie's voice is a murmur, "I ordered one plain, one pepperoni. Wayne can eat whatever we don't when he gets in tomorrow."

Hannah hums in acknowledgement and leans in slightly towards Eddie. "I'm sorry for making you miss the fireworks." 

Hannah is speaking so quietly, Eddie has to lean in too. But he copies her speech. "Nothing to apologise for, Han." He wants to say that it doesn't matter as long as he's with her, but instead he tempers his sentiment. "I'd rather do pizza and a movie anyway." 

She understands what Eddie isn't saying. "Me too." 

Eddie resumes his tune. Along with the drone of the AC unit in the window, and the buzz of Eddie's hand along her arm, Hannah is starting to relax. She decides to deal with real life tomorrow. Right now, she wants to stay in denial; stay in this moment with Eddie.

Eddie's ears perk up as he hears the crunch of tyres coming from outside. He doesn't want knocking to burst their peaceful bubble, so he squeezes Hannah's hand and places it in her lap, bounding off the couch and opening the door before the pizza guy is even up the porch steps. Eddie pays and thanks him before padding back to Hannah, placing the boxes on the table and flopping down next to her with a grunt. This causes Hannah to fall towards him, shoulder to shoulder. 

Eddie’s heart sinks when she immediately sits up and away from him again, but he smiles when he sees her shining eyes as she zeroes in on the pizza. Hannah pulls out two slices and passes one to him. When she settles back into the couch, she rests her back against his arm, and wiggles until he takes the hint and puts it around her. A small smile on her face, Hannah raises her pizza to Eddie. “Cheers.”

Eddie chuckles and taps his slice to hers. “Cheers, sweetheart.” He nudges his temple against hers and she turns to press her forehead to his.

—

Hours later, The Princess Bride is quietly playing on the TV across the room from the couch, where Hannah is now laying on top of Eddie; him flat on his back with her cheek to his chest, torsos pressed together and her hips between his raised knees. Eddie is running one hand up and down her back. His other is entwined with Hannah’s, hanging down to the floor as she plays with the rings on his fingers.

This is Eddie’s favourite version of Hannah: soft; warm; affectionate.

Eddie’s hand drifts further up Hannah’s back into her hair and scratches at her scalp. She hums and nuzzles into Eddie’s touch. She props her chin on his chest, gazing up at him. Her free hand reaches out and begins tracing aspects of him with her fingers, skimming over his soft cheeks and strong jawline. She presses her thumb into the dip in his chin and her fingertips whisper along the skin under his eye, admiring his faint crows feet and the light smattering of freckles. Hannah ventures further up, hungry for more of him; she pushes her fingers into his bangs and sweeps her thumb across his forehead, smoothing out the crinkles from his concentration on the movie.

Eddie turns away from the TV with a smirk. "Help you?"

Hannah's index finger ghosts over his plump, pink mouth and settles in his dimple. "Just looking." A fond expression on her face. "You're so pretty, Eds."

The tops of his cheeks bloom pink. Hannah's fingers dance across the blush, giggling at the effect her words have had.

Eddie cups the back of Hannah’s head. “Can’t compare to you, sweetheart.”

“Fuck off.” She’s beaming now.

Hannah shifts her weight back onto her knees and crawls forward, nestling into the crook of Eddie’s neck. She places a kiss behind his ear. Eddie makes a happy noise from the back of his throat and hugs her closer. Hannah pulls back slightly and dots kisses over his face, both of them giggling, their faces pink with affection. Her kisses follow the path of her fingers before finally pressing a soft kiss to his lips. She goes to pull away, but Eddie threads his fingers through her hair and pulls her back to kiss him again. 

She’s fully indulging herself now. Being greedy.

"You know,” Hannah’s lips brush Eddie’s as she speaks. “If we went outside, we could probably see the fireworks when they start."

"Yeah?” Eddie grins. “You want to?"

Hannah nods eagerly.

Immediately, Eddie rolls them both off the couch, Hannah screeches at the sudden fall. He jumps up, standing over her in a heap on the floor. 

“Jerk!” Hannah kicks out at Eddie and he catches her by the ankle. “Let me go!” She whines, grabbing at him as he laughs.

“C’mere.” Eddie captures Hannah’s hands and hauls her up into an embrace. He cups her face and smacks a kiss to her mouth. 

Eddie thinks for a moment. "Trust me?"

"Well that's never a good start to anything."

He cackles. "I'm taking that as a yes." 

Eddie pulls her to the front door. The pair of them scramble to put their shoes on, giddy at the prospect of doing something foolish. They stumble through the door and Eddie drags Hannah by the hand around the side of the trailer where he gets down on one knee under an open window. He taps his thigh and looks up at Hannah expectantly.

“I… don’t understand what’s happening right now.”

Eddie grins wickedly. “We’re going up, sweetheart.”

“Fuck that. No.”

“C’mon, we’ll have the best view from up there!” He pouts at her, using his best puppy dog eyes.

Hannah groans, but moves to step up onto his leg, mumbling about “those fucking eyes.” 

“Ok, now step onto the windowsill, and I’ll push you up onto the roof.”

Hannah grunts as she heaves herself up and clings onto the edge of the tin roof by her fingers. “If this is just an excuse to feel me up, I’m gonna kill you.”

Eddie gasps dramatically. “Me? I’m the picture of integrity, Han.” He grips her by the hips and encourages her upwards, giving her a tap on the ass as she wiggles over the edge into a heap on the roof.

“Perv!" 

Eddie appears a few moments later and collapses on top of her; forearms braced either side of her head. “You love it.” He buries his face in her neck, making her squeal as he blows raspberries against her skin.

They're interrupted by a loud boom echoing through the trailer park.

"Shit, it's starting! Get off me!"

They scramble up to face the fireworks exploding in the sky. Eddie sits with his legs spread out and pats the space between them for Hannah to sit. She settles with her back to his chest and he wraps his arms around her front, pulling her flush to him, his chin resting on her shoulder as she hugs one of his arms tightly.

The pair stay like that, watching the rest of the fireworks display, Eddie occasionally pressing kisses to Hannah's shoulder and neck. When the last bang rings out and the sparkles fade, they remain silent for a while, enjoying the quiet of the trailer park; all the other residents probably at the fair. 

Eddie burrows his face into Hannah's hair. "Do you want to stay up here for a bit longer or go back inside?"

Hannah turns her head to nuzzle him back. "Maybe we should go inside. I can't feel my butt." 

"Oh thank god, me neither!" 

Both of them fall to the side, giggling. Eddie manoeuvres them so that Hannah is laid out beneath him. He cradles the back of her head, weight braced on his forearm, with his other hand on her waist. He nudges his nose against hers and she lifts her chin to press a sweet kiss to his lips. 

Eddie draws back a little, his gaze flicking between her hazy, adoring eyes. "Do you want to talk about whatever is going on with you?"

Hannah stiffens and her eyes snap fully open.

"Shit." He fucked up. "Han, I-"

Hannah sits up, pushing Eddie back onto his heels. She presses her palms to her eyes and huffs. "I shouldn't… we should… fuck-" Hannah looks around. "Can we get down, please?"

“Yeah! Yeah, of course.”

Eddie scrambles to the edge of the roof and over, landing with a grunt, and then turns back and helps Hannah slide down. The second her feet touch the ground, Hannah rushes off around the trailer, up the porch steps, and through the front door. She stops in the threshold, hugging her arms to her chest. Eddie scurries after her.

Eddie steps up behind Hannah. “Hey, look, I’m sorry.” He coos, turning her around gently. “Let’s forget about it, ok? We can just finish the movie.” He desperately doesn’t want her to leave. He doesn’t want to lose that closeness, that loving version of Hannah he just had.

“You don’t need to be sorry, Eddie. It’s my fault, I know I’m being weird.”

“Do you wanna talk about it?”

Hannah stiffens again and whispers, “I can’t. Not right now.”

“Sweetheart… please?” Eddie pulls her to him by the waist, cradling her head with his other hand, pushing his thumb into her cheek. “You’re worrying me now.”

"Listen, I've just… I've got some stuff going on. And," she puts her palms flat on his chest and steps back from him. "It means I won't be able to see you. For a while, at least."

"What?"

"Eddie," she pleads, eyes darting around the room. "I can't explain right now, ok?" 

He steps closer to her again. "Han, look at me." He grips her hands in his and ducks his head to catch her gaze. “Please, talk to me. I just want to help.”

Hannah squirms. “I don’t need-”

“I know! I know you don’t need help, Hannah! But I want to.”

She looks up at Eddie, eyebrows furrowed. “Why?”

Eddie splutters. “Why?! Because we’re-” he gestures between them. “Because I like you! I really fucking like you!” He’s gesturing wildly now. 

Hannah buries her face in her palms, her voice muffled. “I know, Eddie and I really- I- FUCK!” She throws her hands out, her eyes glassy now. “Why do I find this so fucking hard!”

“Hey, it’s ok-”

“No! It’s not, Eddie!” Hannah swipes at her eyes. “I’m emotionally stunted. I’m grumpy and irritable and I can’t express my fucking feelings.” She takes a deep breath and shakes her head. “I just need some space, Eddie. I’m sorry I just can’t say why right now.”

“Sweetheart, you’re really worrying me.” Eddie goes to cradle Hannah’s face again, but she immediately pushes him back.

“Stop, Eddie. I don’t need you to worry about me.”

Eddie is having trouble tempering his emotions. He just wants to help. “Well, tough shit, Han! You can’t exactly stop me caring about you.”

"You're not my boyfriend!"

They both freeze. She shouldn't have said that. She didn't mean it like that.

"Shit. Eds-"

"No.” He cuts her off. “You're right. I'm not your boyfriend." Eddie's voice is quiet, but icy. His eyes hard. "I'm just some guy you’ve been fucking."

Hannah flinches at the venom in his words. "No, you’re not- I didn't- I can't… I just can't!"

"Right, my bad. The ice queen can't have a boyfriend. She'd need to have actual feelings for that."

Hurt flashes across Hannah's face and she blinks back the tears threatening to spill. Her voice is strained when she speaks. "I should-" she clears her throat. "I'm gonna go." 

“Fine.”

Hannah steps past Eddie to the door. He doesn’t move to stop her.

“Bye, Eds.”

Hannah closes the door behind her and trudges down the steps. She takes a shuddering breath and rubs at her eyes. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry.

“Son of a BITCH!” 

The exclamation is muffled from inside the trailer, but still makes Hannah jump. Seconds later, the door slams open and Eddie stomps after her with his keys in hand.

“If you think I’m letting you walk home in the dark, you’re a moron as well as an asshole.”

Hannah lets out a strangled noise halfway between a laugh and a sob, tears finally spilling over her cheeks. She rushes to Eddie and throws her arms around his waist, burying her face in his chest. The action knocks the wind out of him.

Eddie sighs, but doesn’t hesitate to hug her back.

“C’mon sweetheart. Let’s get you home.”

Hannah pulls back and nods, sniffing and wiping her eyes.

Eddie takes Hannah’s hand and leads her to the passenger side of the van. He helps her up and closes the door behind her before rounding the front and pulling himself into his seat. He starts up the van, but immediately shuts off the music, choosing to drive in silence in the hope that Hannah might start talking to him.

As the van pulls out of the trailer park, Hannah reaches over and takes his right hand, holding it in her lap. She knows she shouldn’t, but she can’t help it. She wants to indulge in little bits of him while she still can. Hannah twists the lone ring on this hand around his finger.

After a little while, Eddie breaks the silence.

“It’s my favourite, you know.” Eddie’s voice is low and he doesn’t look over at her.

Hannah doesn’t look at Eddie either, but continues to stare at his hand cradled in hers. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” He sighs. “This really amazing girl got it for me. You probably don’t know her.”

"No?"

"Nah, she was actually nice to me."

Hannah scoffs. "Well that's just not true."

Eddie grins, but there's a sadness in it. He parks the van outside Hannah's house and finally turns to look at her.

"Hannah?"

Hannah stares blindly straight ahead out the windshield. If she looks at Eddie, she’ll definitely cave.

"Hannah, please just talk to me. Tell me what's going on. What can I do?"

If she tells him now, he might hate her. He might be angry and not want anything to do with her; which would hurt. Or he might stay with her out of pity; which would hurt more.

"Nothing, Eddie. There's nothing you can do." Hannah resumes fiddling with Eddie's ring. "I need some time to get my shit sorted."

"Can you at least tell me if you're ok?"

"Yeah, I'm…" She rests her head back on the seat and sighs. "I don't know. But I think I will be." 

That didn't reassure Eddie at all. "Do you at least have someone helping you? If it can't be me."

"I've got Jules. And I'm gonna talk to my dad." 

She wants to tell him she doesn't want to do this. She wants to ask if he'll let her be self-centred, let her be greedy and keep him. She thinks he'd say yes.

But that wouldn't be fair.

"I'll see you around, Eds." She squeezes his hand and opens the door, but pauses before getting out.

One more moment of indulging herself.

Hannah turns back to Eddie and leans over the centre console, pulling him towards her with a hand on his cheek. She presses her lips against his in a lingering kiss. Eddie sighs and holds her hand to keep her there a little longer. 

Their foreheads stay pressed together as their lips part, neither of them wanting the moment to end. Hannah places another soft peck to the corner of his mouth and whispers, "Bye Eddie."

[ririnya7]

15 Day BL Challenge - The Sequel

here's the challenge if you want to do it!

Ok so I'm going to skip day 22 cause I'm too much of a newbie to know who's considered a rookie actor and who a veteran 😭

On to:

Day 23: Most disappointing ending to a series?

I gotta prefix this by saying that I don't think I was too disappointed by any BL show I've watched so far which is surprising to me as well!

But some of these shows could have wrapped up the show a bit better in my opinion.

Spoilers ahead for the following: The Sign, I Feel You Linger In The Air, Kinnporsche, Pit Babe

The Sign

I loved this show a great deal. And maybe this is part of the reason why I wanted the ending to have a bit more standing than what it had.

Now the show itself had a bit of a pacing problem trying to navigate between each case and the romance but I didn't mind until the very end. Tharn got separated from Phaya and it was very excruciating and heartbreaking watching Phaya grieving for his lost soulmate. Truly (my tears are proof).

But in the next five minutes or so Tharn comes back magically out of thin air. Nothing gets explained and the viewer stays perplexed at the heavy feelings that were just thrown at him like a boulder to hold. The whiplash was too severe to feel happy so I got disappointed instead.

I Feel You Linger In The Air

Just like the previous show this one had so much potential for a heartbreaking ending and to me it fell flat. Now I can't fault the screenwriters too much since it's based on the novel but I wish the ending was different. Again my tears were for naught when I realised Jom went back to the past again. I know they're supposed to be fated in every universe and all but I think it would make more impact if he hadn't. Still I want to see more so I'm not complaining!

Kinnporsche

For obvious reasons I once again can't fault the screenwriters.

Kinnporsche leading the family makes no sense to me. There I said it. Call me a minor family's lackey or worse slut (only affectionately plz) but if we want to accept that Vegas survives he would never accept that reality. That could create a season 2 but since we don't have anymore let me complain.

PitBabe

I felt a bit confused by the ending. It felt a bit rushed with lots of lore to explore and explain but this is why season 2 is happening?? Hopefully. Fingers crossed 🤞

All these BL shows suffer from a season2vitis so I'll forgive them 💗

[theshimadaslovers]

I wasn't planning in make other boys of Overwatch, but...I couldn't resist 👁👄👁

《《💀🖤💀》》

~CAKES FOR REAPER~

(REAPER X YOU FEM!READER)

Summary: It's Reaper's birthday and...well, only you remembered. Not only a bday but, became a little more tha that for Reaper.

Genre: Very cute and fluffy, a little dramatic, but we love drama, come on.

Warnings: Definitely none. It's cute!

*Talon just went back from a mission, you're a newbie so Reaper prefer to let you out of this one, for safety. Everyone went back to the rooms and Reaper was injured, so he lay down on his bed for rest*

*You knock his door*

Reaper- What?

You- Is me...I came to check on you.

Reaper- I'm fine, go away.

You- *Opens the door* Is unlocked, silly.

Reaper- *sighs in stress*

You- Moira told me...you almost died for real this time.

Reaper- *Chuckles* Good lucky with that.

You- You may be dead and alive at the same time, Gabriel, but you still can die...for real! *sits on the bed checking his bandages* Stop being crazy in some missions.

Reaper- Do you even know what happened, girl?

You- ...You went alone to a room full of omics...big ones.

Reaper- *sighs* I didn't knew...

You- You silly owl...*sighs* Careful next time, yeah?

Reaper- Why do you care so much?

You- Do you really wants to know the answer? *laughs* I guess not.

Reaper- ..... I do.

You- Because you're my friend.

Reaper- *looked away* I'm not your friend.

You- But I see you as a friend *gets up* You had dinner?

Reaper- Not hungry.

You- That was not my question, sunshine.

Reaper- *Sighs in stress again* No....!

You- I'll bring you something. I asked Moira if you still eat normally as a person, so... I'll make for you.

Reaper- *laugh* I'm not a person for you?

You- You're a dead alive person, it's different. *walks out the room*

Reaper- Mm...*heavy breath*

*At the principal room, you were checking out some informations about the last missions*

Widow- *coming back with a coffee*

You- *look at her* You went to a coffee shop?

Widow- Oui.

You- What? How?

Widow- Disguise.

Sombra- Hey! *Suddenly appears* You guys won't believe what I just found!

Widow- Depends.

Sombra- A hilarious Google research from Cole Cassidy!

You- Cole Cassidy?

Widow- Jesse McCree.

You- Oh yeah, he changed his name.

Sombra- "Cactus spines in butt, how get rid off?" HAHAAA! *Everybody laughing*

Widow- So pathetic...*laughs*

You- Where the HELL he get a cactus?! Poor thing.

Doom- Ladies...what is all that noise? *Enters the room*

Sombra- I'll show you later, boss! *still laughing* Overwatch is hilarious!

Doom- Well, you two has to come with me for some business trip and y/n will take care of Reaper. After his almost suicidal plan, he'll stay for rest.

You- Business trip? *laughs* Come on, boss, be honest.

Doom- Ok *laughs* We got some murders to make. Let's go, the plane is taking off in 20 minutes.

Sombra- And our stuff?

Doom- They put everything on the plane. Let's go.

Sombra- Alright, that was a five star service *look at you and smirked* Good lucky, chiquita. *Disappear*

Widow- I need some vacations...*rool eyes and walks out the room closing the door*

*You keep sitting on the chair and looks at Reapers room door, then the calendar*

*At Reapers room, after hours completely impatient and taking naps, his cells regenerated completely his superficial wounds. He sat on the bed and breath heavily feeling the pain on his left rib, taking his hand on the bandage around his body. Stands up almost losing balance and leans himself against the wall*

Reaper- Fucking hell...! *moan and look at the calendar on the wall looking at the date for a couple of minutes. Breath heavily and starts to walk to the door* No one cares, Reyes...

*He went out of his room looking the empty place*

Reaper- Finally alone... *sighs in content*

You- Not for so long *Appers and laughs* I made something for you at the kitchen, I was about to bring it for you.

Reaper- I'm not hungry.

You- I didn't ask... *smiles to him and stand in front of him* Go, you gonna like it.

Reaper-...it is...cookies?

You- Maybe *laughs* You're funny, good thing I like you. *tap his shoulders and went to your room*

Reaper- *sighs and walks towards the kitchen*

*Arriving the kitchen he come across with the most caring situation he could ever cross, a cake on the table, with candles lighted, a plate of cookies and a paper plaque written "Happy Birthday, Dark Knight♡"*

*He stands there for a while trying to process everything. First, how the hell you knew that he was Gabriel Reyes, second, how the hell you knew his birthday date? Well, he only sighs trying not to feel pleased under his mask and walks towards the table. He grab a cookie and chuckle*

Reaper- Cookie~

*He felt your presence behind him and turned around still holding the cookie*

You- *laughs* You like it?

Reaper- How did you know? All about that?

You- I have my secrets. *you smiled going towards him and hugs Reaper making his embarrassed* Happy birthday, Gab.

Reaper- Mmmm...! *Literally paralyzed*

You- *laughs and steps away* Not used to hugs, huh? Oh! I got you a gift too! Be right back! Don't! Run away! *points to him and ran out*

Reaper- A...gift? Birthday gift? *take off the mask revealing a grey skin full of scars* But I have cookie...*eats the cookie and felt a little bit of joy on his body wiggling little* Good cookie...~

You- Gab! *Tuns to the kitchen with a small box* Here! I made it for you! Is a decoration for your guys, I don't have any idea how and from where you pick up the guys, but...Yeah.

Reaper- You made it?

You- Yep. Open up! *excited*

*He grab the box and opens up without hesitation feeling surprised by seeing a little cute Reaper perfectly made by hand, it was a pendent for his shotguns*

Reaper- *Inhales* You...you made it with your own hands?

You- Yes, commander *smiles*

Reaper- For me?

You- *nodded*

Reaper- Mm...*put the mask on and smile inside of it* Ah...thanks...right. I...I like it. *blush and clears his throat*

You- That was the first present, I think you deserve more than one.

Reaper- *Looks at you for a while* One more?

You- Yep.

Reaper- Why? I'm a high functional psychopath and you're giving me gifts.

You- Yeah. *smiles*

Reaper- ....Why?

You- You're my friend, Gab. Talon is not the most supportive group but I am. You know... is good to put a smile in someone so hurted like you.

Reaper- I did not smiled...*blush inside the mask and looked away*

You- I know you did, Reyes, I know. *laughs and stand on your tiptoes to give him a kiss on his mask* Happy birthday, sir and enjoy the cake and cookies, are just for you~ *walks away from the kitchen* I'll be at my room!

Reaper- Mmmm....*look at the pendent and smiles again* Talon don't deserve you.... *look at the door and sighs*

*He sat down on the table and bring the plate of cookies to him, take off the mask again and enjoy every piece of each cookie. About to eat the cake all by himself, he stopped and think, sighs, stands up and grab a big knife cutting two slices*

*He walks through the hallways looking for you room holding to plates with cake. Finding he knock it with his foot and you immediately went to open up*

You- Oh...Hey! *smiles* Did you ate everything?

Reaper- I was thinking if we can enjoy the cake together...on my fucking birthday.

You- *laughs and blush* Sure, it would be a pleasure. Come in! *you gently pull him inside*

*Minutes later both was sitting on your bed talking like two normal people, he put the mask aside but not for too long, since the mask is what helps him breath. He put the mask back and chuckle at the conversation you both were talking*

Reaper- It was funny how Jack Morrison was such a needy guy for attention at the time...

You- Really? I tought that he was a little more mature *both laughed*

Reaper- After became Overwatch commander's, he went a little more mature...

You- Oh man... You pass trought some good shits with Overwatch.

*Reaper looked away and sighs loudly enough to have your attention and you get more worried*

You- You're ok?

Reaper- Why you're in Talon?

You- I...*Felt confused* I'm here because I was saved by you guys in Russia, remember?

Reaper- But why you stay? We're the bad guys...you're not bad. Talon don't deserve someone like you.

You- I know. *smiled making him surprised by your unexpected answer* But you're here, Reaper.

Reaper- *Takes his hand to his chest feeling his heart race*

You- And I believe there's goodness behind this dark owl mask.

Reaper- *chuckles* Goodness? I'm a high functional-

You- A high functional psychopath *roll eyes and laughs* But you're not.

Reaper- *groans*

You- If you were, I wouldn't be here. You wouldn't care. We wouldn't be eating cake and having a nice chat in my bed. This is what a high functional psychopath sounds like?

Reaper- *Speechless*

You- You have feelings and empathy, Reaper...You're Gabriel Reyes...and you're broken. Come on, you loved my cookies! *laughs*

Reaper- I'm not a...psychopath?

You- I'm not a doctor or psychiatrist...but...yeah, you're a not a psychopath, Gab. I don't know who you were, but...Talon is doing so bad shit with your head. This anger inside of you? This depression? You're broken and is so much worse.

*Reaper stand in silent and looked away thinking a about everything that already happened to him those last years. He never really enjoyed killing, he's just... angry*

You- *stand on your knees in front of him and open your arms* Come on.

Reaper-....No.

You- You hugged me earlier, come on, Rey!

Reaper- I don't like hu...!!! *You suddenly falls on him hugging*

You- You're just not used anymore...*Hug him tightly* You need to rest your head somewhere for a while.

Reaper- *Slowly starts to embrace you on his arms* I...I'm not good...with this.

You- *chuckle* You don't need to be good...

*Reaper let his emotions act for a second and hugged you tightly pulling you more close to him. You were surprised that he won't let it go of you anymore...at least, it's seems like not. You had to sit on his lap, because it looks like he wanted to pull you more closer to him, which was impossible... but he enjoyed feel that again. His head rested on your shoulder and both relaxed keeping the hug. You smiled feeling that you finally could try to help him and his poisoned soul*

Continue ....??

[lunion]

To be a writter is to drown in endless drafts and honestly, I can see now why finishing something is much harder than starting it.

I planned to write a multi chapter fic and built the skeleton for it. Ok. Turns out that I got a paid internship and I won't have as much time as I hoped I'd have for this, so instead I decided to just write a oneshot.

Now I'm having trouble finishing this oneshot and I can't seem to find a way to write the next scene and I started going over it to see what was wrong and why I couldn't get it to feel right.

Well, turns out I wrote my way out of the desired conclusion,

Context:

This chapter is set in a work place and they have a new hire who's failing spetacularly on every task they give her due to misaligned expectations. Basically, she has a unique skillset because of her abilities, but because they're putting her in "regular" job positions, she's not up to the task because these don't play to her strenghts.

I wanted the conclusion of the chapter to be of the characters realizing the unspoken qualities of new hire and having things improved after they stopped trying to get her to do her job like everyone else and instead using her strenghts to achieve what others couldn't do before.

The problem comes from how I structured the chapter. It was split in 4 scenes.

1: New hire being introduced to the work place 2: New hire shown to be struggling. Lazy colleagues see her failing and are later assigned by their boss to show the ropes to the new hire so she better adapts to the new place. 3: A week of problems later, the colleagues are complaining and discussing convincing the boss to fire the new hire. a third party listens to the conversation and brings attention to how despite the colleagues owns shortcomings, the boss still keeps them because they're resourceful and the boss trusts they can become better employees if given the chance (things which are true) and that they should probably give the benefit of the doubt to the new hire and actually help her better utilize her strenghts to everyone's advantage. 4: The boss and the third party are chatting and observe in the distance the new hire and the colleagues, now having a blast as they creatively solve their previous problems and are now bonding and becoming friends, content at the resolution and seeing everyone thriving.

nothing wrong until you factor in a few hardships I accidentally put myself through.

a) On scene 2, the boss, because they're meticulous and thorough in their work and words, explicitly tells the older employees to keep a close eye and help the new hire to learn the ropes. This causes a problem on scene 3 because then the only way of having the older colleagues still haven't noticed the new hire's qualities now would be willful neglect, be it out of actual disdain for the new hire, which makes the scene much more mean spirited than I'd like, or out of actively ignoring their task, when their laziness is closer to "I'd rather not have to do this" than "I'll ignore work given to me", because the boss would have certainly fired them at this point. The colleagues are meant to be capable, but somewhat uncommited workers, not actual burdens and especially not so self centered that they'd leave a newbie who they had the explicit task of helping to fend off for themselves.

b) On scene 3, they have this talk with the third party, which is meant to help the older employees to realize that they don't know the new hire's skills and that they should give her a chance. The problem is that the third party, at least based on the original draft of the multi chapter story, the third party cannot have (or at least would be weird) to have the insight of "different people can achieve things through different means", because one of the core personality traits of said third party is being very judgemental about their own shortcomings on more "traditional skills", their main character arc revolving around the fact that despite him not being skilled on the traditional skills other people have, his resourcefulness allows him to achieve what others don't.

The reason that's the case it's because this chapter was meant to foreshadow this third party's (who is the main character of the main arc of the story) journey about realizing that even if he isn't capable like the others, he's no less capable than others, because there are many ways to make a meaningful change in the world besides the more obvious, ableist ways. Having him tell other characters of the lesson he's supposed to learn at the end of his own journey sounds a bit weird to be.

So this whole situation leaves me in a conundrum. I like how my characters are characterized and the only way to make the draft work right now is by removing the boss's meticulousness, which breaks characterization, having the older employees be too lazy or mean, which also breaks characterization or having a character be way more insightful on a life lesson he has no business being this aware of.

Of course, technically, I could scrap this scene and start it from scratch to solve these problems so I'm not confined to the chapter planning I already made, but at this point, the reason I quit the multi chapter idea was not having enough time for that. if I had to start over, then I might just scrap it.

Not sure if I'm looking for solutions or venting, but I thought it'd be interesting to share.

[hybbart]

Okay, but as a crazy horse person who has spent WAY too many years drawing horses, they are actually pretty good. Like I can see the arabian/draft horse vibes. In short, I adore them and am happy you added horses. Maybe we can get a proper introduction of all their names? Unless you've already done that and I haven't seen lol

Thank you! I'm... I'm trying... Ok I'mma willingly embarrass myself and post the horrendous first draft just-trying-to-get-their-coat-and-vague-shape-down rough sketches of the horses below the cut and a little info about each. But all four are horses that at least one of the ranchers have owned.

First of all I simplified Adequate and Oreo's designs for the sake of drawing them easily, and gave Arrow and arrow-ish white face marking and hoof cause they seemed a bit plain compared to the others and was too much like Revy with the all dark colour.

All four are from Bdub's stables, and all of them are over 4 years old- well trained and beginner-safe personalities, since Tango's never even seen a horse in person before and Jimmy only has a bit of riding experience. Oreo and Bullseye are intended to be given to the hospital.

Adequate is, well, a very adequate horse. They're strong, sturdy, and pretty fast. Nothing spectacular but good enough for anything. They're very relaxed and the oldest of the horses, takes things easy and isn't easy to spook- though that's nearly gotten them bitten by stray zombies a few times. The moon could crash into the earth and they'd still be grazing. They got paired with complete newbie Tango during lessons cause of that. They'll eat anything put in front of him.

Oreo is the second oldest but much younger. They're a typical draft horse given with the intent to be used as one. They're used to lots of people and good with kids, but don't get along well with other animals, particularly dogs. Their favourite snack is sugar cubes and other sweet things.

Arrow is a small and fast horse, good for riding, and the youngest. they're very much fight over flight when startled and has kicked the life out of more than a few zombies. By far the most rowdy of the horses given to the ranchers, but still more than manageable. They like to play with Revy, which is always a bit startling to the inexperienced ranchers, but they haven't hurt each other yet. They like pumpkins the most, or maybe they just like tossing the bits around.

Bullseye is the most skittish of the horses. They're always going, having a lot of nervous energy. They also love to be given attention, being talked to, and being groomed. They go to the hospital, where it's a bit quieter and Scar can keep them company. Their favourite snack is yellow carrots and bananas, they just seem to like the colour more than anything.