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#I'm sorry I think bringing someone back to life is romantic
angel-bitch-boy · 10 months
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No One:
Me: No one knows I have OC's where it's Frankenstein but a dark romantic where Victor falls in love with another scientist in college but he passes from pneumonia only for him to go completely mad over losing the love of his life so he dedicates himself to bringing him back and digging up his old love only for his creation to be disgusted at what he's become while Victor still pines desperately over his lover.
"Then if this is the way it is, if this world has cursed me to be a monster, then God please let me be his, always his"
"He holds his face in his hands, pressed against the body that he had stitched together and created just for this. This is all he could ever want him to be."
I hate them. (I love them)
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satoruxx · 11 months
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pairing: gojo satoru x reader summary: bestfriend!satoru has returned, fluff, pining, slightly angsty bc of pining, simp satoru hehe, oblivious reader is back again, satoru loves you !! rheya's note: continuation to this drabble bc bestfriend!satoru is everything to me !!
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bestfriend!satoru who insists that you have him on speed dial because "he's the most important person in your life" but really it just satisfies him to know that he's the first one you'd call if you needed anything.
bestfriend!satoru who started off being a bit of an ass when you first met. not because he was trying to be but because he's got an ego and doesn't know how to control it, until you call him out for his shit and it sends his heartbeat all out of wack.
bestfriend!satoru who doesn't trust anyone else around you. it's not out of concern or anything, oh no. but in his expert opinion only him and the people he trusts (like suguru, shoko, or nanami) should ever get within six feet of you.
bestfriend!satoru who waits outside every class for you, leaning against the wall with a bag of your favorite snacks in his hand, glasses perched low on his nose. the smile that crawls onto his face as you walk out of the classroom and join him is practically blinding.
bestfriend!satoru who grows older thinking of nothing but you. the person most important to him, the person he would move galaxies for. and no, it's not romantic or anything. he's just your best friend.
bestfriend!satoru who realizes that he's not the only one in the world who knows that you're attractive, and has to clench his fists with a scowl as he sees other men noticing you. then he has to stop and check himself because, why on earth is he mad about it?
bestfriend!satoru who starts openly staring at you because he can't even control it anymore, eyes soft and overflowing affection as he watches you indulge in silly mundane tasks. and when you turn and catch him looking all he can do is give you a dreamy little smile. he's got no excuses but he's gonna play it off like it's something you shouldn't worry about anyway.
bestfriend!satoru who makes you his number one priority, who doesn't care about anyone else when you're in front of him. and even if you aren't around, he can't bring himself to look at anyone else. if someone comes up to him on the street, mumbling something about how he's their type and they'd like his contact info, all he does is give them a breezy wave, saying "sorry. i got someone waiting for me."
bestfriend!satoru who, when you're trying to explain something and someone speaks over you, gives you a resolute "no i'm listening." and doesn't take his eyes away from you until you've said all that you needed to. don't ever think that nobody is listening to you because you always have his attention.
bestfriend!satoru who grits his teeth as you tell him about another unsuccessful date with a man who didn't even know how to treat you right. and how could they, when they don't even know how you like your coffee or what side of the bed you prefer to sleep on? they don't know what your favorite movie snack is or about your obsession with plants or your most precious pair of fluffy socks. not the way he does.
bestfriend!satoru who has to hold himself back during your ranting, who has to keep himself from just letting go and spilling that you weren't going to find someone who loved you more than he did. to stop himself from leaning down and kissing you so hard it takes your breath away, because he's wanted to do it since he was sixteen. he was just too stupid to understand it back then.
bestfriend!satoru who chooses to wait instead, knowing that he'll be stuck with these feelings for the rest of his life, so he'd rather wait for you. because he'd hate himself if he made you uncomfortable, and if he lost the relationship he had with you now over his silly little heart. no instead, he'll keep proving himself, staying by your side and showing you even just of fraction of the devotion he knows he has for you, if it means that you'll be by his side. and hoping that one day, maybe, you'd tell him you feel the same.
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astonmartinii · 1 year
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into the arms of another part two | max verstappen social media au
pairing: max verstappen x reader
part two to this !! part three
yourusername
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liked by arthurleclerc, maxverstappen1 and 661,230 others
yourusername: winner winner chicken dinner !! congrats maxy i’m so proud of you always
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user1: i know charles’ head is hot right now
user2: i hope netflix are taking notes cause this tea is steaming hot
maxverstappen1: thank you baby, helps when i have the prettiest cheerleader in the world
yourusername: i am the sexiest sargent in all of the orange army
maxverstappen1: too right you are
user3: i miss when y/n was the head of the tifosi the red monochromatic fits ate so hard
user4: i need charles to pull his head out of his ass and apologise so we can reclaim her before monza
user5: do not even bring up the fact we may not have custody of her for monza
danielricciardo: leave some for the rest of us maxy
yourusername: no actually i think it’s illegal for max not to win sorry
danielricciardo: will that change if charlie apologises?
yourusername: considering that hasn’t happened and doesn’t look to be happening any time soon - no.
user6: CHARLES PLEASE DO SOMETHING
user7: he doesn’t have to do anything, she’s just bitter cause she’s always been the bridesmaid and never the bride. we ALL know she’s always loved charles and she can’t handle that she’s not the centre of his attention it’s kinda pathetic
maxverstappen1: what made you think you know any of us enough to comment something like this? what told you that you even had a right to talk about y/n like that? she’s everything you could ever wish to be and more and she will never ever deserve the things you people are saying about her. charles would be lucky to have y/n in his life platonically or romantically but it’s his loss
user8: boyf of the year right here
user9: charles take note ^^^ this is how you’re meant to defend your best friend
landonorris: i am once again asking for photo credits i’m not gonna be your personal photographer for free
maxverstappen1: i literally paid for your dinner
yourusername: you’re literally a millionaire
landonorris: i don’t care a man still likes to be wined and dined
yourusername: just to make it clear we are not looking for a third
user10: i promise i can change your mind give me a chance
f1tea
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liked by user11, user12 and 2,349 others
f1tea: charles leclerc caught liking this tweet about the situation between him and y/n. seems like he won’t back down on this. what do you think?
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user13: i need this mans head on a spike i’m so serious
user14: i want to play pinball with the single marble in his head
user15: i think ferrari have genuinely caused real head rot in him cause no way he thinks this is a serve
user16: let's be real charles' biggest rivals are ferrari and himself
user17: not this man at his BIG AGE is liking shady tweets about his best friend
user18: i think it's safe to say they're not best friends any more
user19: also "biggest rival" my ass max and charles are fucking friends now so this whole narrative is complete horse shit
user20: i'm so bored of charles playing the victim bro YOU ARE THE INSTIGATOR YOU ARE THE PROBLEM
user21: the way charles is liking shit like this but max is writing whole ass essays in the comments defending her
user22: and that''s why i'll always back that she ended up with the right man
user23: max is so far in the lead in the championship i need him to take charles out for the narrative
user24: are we in high school? like seriously this is so fucking petty i cannot wait for media day this weekend
user25: he's either gonna be the funniest man in the world or he's gonna bite someones fucking head off
user26: and i'll back it either way
user27: i know y/n is about to have her revenge dress moment in the paddock someone get kym illman ready STAT.
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f1wagsupdates
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liked by lilymunhe, carmenmundt and 4,530 others
tagged: yourusername
f1wagsupdates: REVENGE DRESS MOMENT !!! y/n y/ln enters the paddock in monza in this stunning black dress, showing the world what a catch she is, oh and that is max holding the umbrella for her, what a gentleman.
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user28: mother came to slay i cannot even
user29: this right after max came for charles in the press conference is PERFECTION + NO RED IN MONZA !!
user30: i see lily and carmen in the likes in knew they'd be on the right side
user31: girl i don't think anyone is on charles' side
user32: yall see the stink eye from the red bull garage when charles walked past they have y/n's back LOL
user33: the red bull garage been ride or dies for max so it defo makes sense that they would extend that to y/n
user34: christian was defo waiting for a question about it in the press conference
user35: someone on twitter got a clip of him putting his arm around fred going out of the paddock and telling him to get his driver under control
user36: yall are we on the kardashians what the fuck is going on
user37: people may hate christian but he defends his driver so much that he's inserting himself in the relationship drama
user38: i don't even follow f1 but whoever this is this serving oh my
user39: this is so exhausting like i need charles to just apologise so we can get cute y/n x max x charles content
user40: torturing myself thinking about how cute that dynamic could be
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f1
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liked by yourusername, maxverstappen1 and 1,203,457 others
f1: max verstappen clinches his tenth win of the season at monza, joined by sergio perez and oscar piastri. home heroes charles leclerc and carlos sainz came together at turn one, awful showing for ferrari in monza
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user41: this narrative is so so poetic
user42: i feel bad for the tifosi at this point y'all get your hopes up every season
user43: charles you aimed the wrong way if you wanted to take max out
user44: the way max kissed y/n after winning god they're so cute
user45: also the way christian got everyone to move so y/n could get to the front to see max
user46: even marko looked happy about it what is going on?
user47: y'all we knew it was gonna be bad for ferrari y/n wasn't wearing red, call me superstitious but every time she's worn red charles has either won or been on the podium
user48: well that's just what he gets for not appreciating her
user49: as fernando would say KARMA
user50: someone check charles' blood pressure please
maxverstappen1
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liked by christianhorner, yourusername and 1,304,662 others
tagged: yourusername
maxverstappen1: winning on and off the track, some of you can't relate.
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user51: parents omg
danielricciardo: fighting words maxy, not pulling your punches
maxverstappen1: i do my fighting on the track, not my fault people can't get past turn one to give me a real battle
danielricciardo: i need to be inside your brain
maxverstappen1: no there's images of y/n in my brain that no other man will ever see
danielricciardo: you crack me up maxy
yourusername: woah who's that fine ass piece of woman
maxverstappen1: she's taken sorry
yourusername: that's a shame, i hope that man is taking care of her
maxverstappen1: i don't believe she's got any complaints
yourusername: wow you sound like a gentleman, she's a lucky woman
maxverstappen1: believe me i am the lucky one.
yourusername: awwww maxy you're literally the sweetest person in the world
user52: if i was charles and i saw this after that race you'd have to restrain me i'm so serious
user53: i'm happy for y/n and max but i need them to stop being happy in my face
alexalbon: ur welcome for that first picture btw
yourusername: lily taught you well
alexalbon: so no thanks?
yourusername: i joke thank you very much sir albon
user54: so like all of the twitch quartet are on y/n's side? awkward.
yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, georgerussell63, 706,835 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
yourusername: charles and i have been best friends since i knew what the word meant and it really hurts that is has gotten to this point. when charles got his first girlfriend i chalked it up to the excitement of the experience, but when he routinely got in and out of relationships and falling back on our friendship once scorned, i started to question what he really felt about our friendship. i overlooked it every time even when it made me doubt my worth and hoped our friendship meant more. however, the cycle continued and after being left stranded at a beach in a country i do not know i decided it was the end. i have reached out to you so, so many times and want nothing more than our friendship to work and so we can be life-long friends that we can tell our kids about. but i guess it's not worth that much to you and that's something i'll have to reconcile with. the only positive coming from this the fact that it pushed me to the love of my life, so thank you for that.
comments are turned off.
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charles_leclerc
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liked by joristrouche, pierregasly and 1,305,783 others
charles_leclerc: i've already got my trophy, sorry not sorry.
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user56: WHAT THE FUCK
user57: my brain is actually scrambled
user58: charles' must be as well cause no way he thought this was a good idea
landonorris: so this is a low blow
charles_leclerc: since when were you the reference point for morals
landonorris: damn dude, you're in the wrong but go off i guess
user59: why do i actually want to cry for y/n right now? she did this whole ass heartfelt post with no comments so people wouldn't be able to speculate and he replies with a pic of his gf's ASS
danielricciardo: not cool dude
charles_leclerc: i see you all took her side and our friendships mean fuck all
danielricciardo: kinda ironic you bring up respecting friendships
charles_leclerc: spare me the lecture
maxverstappen1: you're a child. but this is the closure she needs. cheers to being an asshole.
charles_leclerc: so you managed to get some of my sloppy seconds, you're welcome
maxverstappen1: she's not sloppy seconds and i can't believe you'd refer to her as that. but if you wanna talk sloppy seconds you can hold the 100 point gap between us in the championship. and y/n will never say this so i'll say it for her GO FUCK YOURSELF
user60: SHOTS FIRED
user61: men are so confusing
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yourusername added to their story
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[caption: taking some time for myself. thank you for your kind words and know i have an amazing support system around me now]
f1wagsupdates
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liked by user65, user66 and 5,430 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
f1wagsupdates: charles leclerc spotted outside y/n y/ln's office with flowers this afternoon. idk at this point, any time i report on this man i lose more brain cells.
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user67: lol even wag page admins are done
f1wagsupdates: he gives me a lot of content but damn he needs to sort his head out
user68: lol this is gonna be an all time apology tour i can't wait
user69: i honestly don't want y/n to forgive him he doesn't deserve it.
user70: yeah max has proven ride or die for y/n so i know who she should stick with
user71: i need him to donate his brain to science cause in what world is a measly bouquet of flowers gonna cover all of this shit ?
user72: legit he's systematically ditched his best friend, let randomers on the internet drage her name through the mud and then liked it and then flaunted the fact that he didn't care about their friendship for everyone to see
maxverstappen1: lol nice try
user73: my petty king i love him so much
user74: i know y/n is taking a break from social media but i hope she knows how much love she's getting
user75: for real we're all on her side i hope she slammed that door in charles' face
user76: i hope that bouquet ended up in the bin
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maxverstappen1 added to their story
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[caption: special delivery for a special girl]
note: i know this was heavily requested so here it is!! i really like it and it's defo open for a third part if yall want charles and y/n to reconcile? thank you for reading xx
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hyunniesgirl · 11 months
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Another Love | part 1
Summary: you've been hopelessly in love with Han since you were children. One night you confess your feelings to him.
Words count: 8,539
Warnings for this part: lots of angst, drunk people, drunk Han is petty asf
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6
A/N: So I made that pool asking if I should post this fic in chapters or a 20,000+ words chapter and the long ass chapter won but at the time my mind told me I would be able to finish the whole fic before posting it... Jokes on me I need validation and feedback for me to write so yeah let's do this in chapters, sorry
A/N2: I had this idea for quite some time now but got suddenly inspired listening to the song another love.
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You're done. Really, you can't take it anymore. You've known Han Jisung since elementary school, you have been basically joined at the hip since then, your parents even became best friends because of you two.
You don't know exactly when you fell in love with him, was it on your second day at school when he invited you to play with him because he noticed you were all alone? Was it when someone made an awkward joke about your messed up hair cut in second grade and he picked a fight with them? Maybe it was the very first moment you laid eyes on him, joking around with everyone and being the most popular kid in the classroom. You really can't remember, but the thing you're sure of is: Han Jisung doesn't like you back.
You've always known that, but inside you there was a tiny bit of hope that one day he would wake up and suddenly love you back.
That didn't happen though. You are now 23 and he has never ever shown the smallest amount of romantic interest in you.
"That's fine", you thought to yourself, ever since you realized your feelings for him, "I'm going to stay with him his entire life, that doesn't sound so bad"
Until it started to sound really bad. What are you gonna do? See him getting a girlfriend, then getting engaged and eventually married? Would you always be there on the sidelines listening to his lovesick whines about the woman he loves so much? Would you be the godmother to his children? By then, would you have gotten over him already? Or would you keep this up forever, marrying someone just because you can't stay alone and being in love with your best friend for the rest of your life? That was the moment you knew you had to stop, you can't keep this up.
Coincidentally Han broke up with his last girlfriend a few months ago, you thought that would be a good opportunity for you to be his rebound, yeah, pretty dignified of you.
So you dress up really pretty, hair up, a dress that always made Han compliment you and to finish it off—the necklace he gave you on your 12th birthday.
You think this is it, this is the day you're going to tell him how much you love him and maybe, just maybe he will contemplate giving you a chance.
When he arrives at your shared apartment, with two cans of beer and fried chicken, you give him a cheerful greeting, setting the table and trying to gather courage to speak.
"So, how was practice?", you begin, maybe some small talk will help you relax.
"It was good, we are almost done with the album", he says, typing something on his phone. "How was your day?", he asks, putting the device on the table and looking at you.
"Good, I had class in the morning and tutoring in the afternoon", you take a sip of your beer, "one of the mothers actually recommended me to other parents and I'm gonna start tutoring more students next week"
He smiles, "that's good, you're really smart"
You blush, bringing the back of your hands to your face to try and lessen the hot skin of your cheeks with the cold of your hands.
"Actually, I want to talk to you", you start, it's now or never.
"Sure-", Jisung stops mid sentence when his phone buzzes. "Just a minute", he looks at the screen and smiles, your heart sinks at the sight. You know that smile too well, you have seen it dozens of times. You feel your insides turning over. It's the smile meant only for the person he likes.
"Hey, Lia. Yeah, totally, I can talk right now", he picks up the call and once again asks you for a minute lifting his index finger, he walks towards the balcony and closes the glass door after going through it.
He's laughing about something, is she even that funny or is he just trying to win her favor? She's pretty, you know it. All of his girlfriends looked like models. You sigh, looking at yourself and feeling awful, suddenly you don't feel pretty anymore, you actually feel ridiculous.
Why did you think things would change just because you got brave enough to speak up? Jisung sees you as a best friend and nothing more, you have to come to terms with that.
Your mind is rushing, thinking about what you're going to do now? Can you keep being friends with him? Yeah, of course, he's your best friend, you won't end your friendship because you can't control your feelings. But you'll need time, right? You won't be able to get over this unrequited love if you keep seeing him everyday, doing everything with him and sleeping in the same house.
"So, what do you want to talk about?", he asks, sitting again. You didn't even notice he had come back inside.
You sigh, you'll tell him about it all and then you'll find the strength in you to move on.
"I like you", you say so low you're not sure he heard you. But he did, he smiles and chuckles.
"I like you too, we're best friends for a reason", he stretches his arm to take a fried chicken.
"No, I like like you", you admit, hugging yourself, feeling cold suddenly, you look around and see Han left the door to the balcony open. "I've been in love with you since I can remember", you complete.
The look on his face would be funny if it wasn't tragic, his brows are furrowed in confusion and his eyes have a very familiar look: fear. Of course, he's afraid of losing his best friend, you already guessed that much.
"Y/N I-", you notice his breathing quickening. "I'm sorry, I never knew", he says, shoulders slumping, his arms dropping to the side of his body.
"Yeah, I know you didn't", you say. He's still staring at you with so much hurt in his eyes. Jisung knows he will have to turn you down and it's going to hurt him a lot, but not as much as it will hurt you and he never ever wanted to hurt you. 
"I'm sorry, I don't know what to say", he takes a deep breath, "I never thought about you in that way, I'm really sorry, I don't feel the same"
You're not going to cry, you decided that the moment you saw fear in his eyes. It's not his fault you like him, he can't fall in love with you just because you love him. You're not going to cry and make him feel worse than you can tell he's already feeling. But listening to those words it's worse than you could have expected, you feel like the world is crumbling around you.
"I know you don't", you smile sadly.
He looks more confused now.
"Then, why did you tell me?"
"It's just… I'm done with all this", you reply, getting up from your chair.
"Done with our friendship?" Han can feel all the air leaving his body while he waits for your answer.
You chuckle, fidgeting with your foot.
"No, I don't think I could ever be done with that", you smile trying to reassure him and he feels so relieved. "I can't keep doing this, I can't continue seeing you with other people and stay hurting alone"
"I can stop bringing people to the apartment and I'll never talk about them around you", he says trying to help and your stomach sinks a lot more. Why does he have to be so sweet?
"Actually, I'll need some time", you clear your throat, "I think I'm going to stay with Seungmin for the time being, he is looking for a roommate"
Han's eyes widen and he gets up, walking towards you.
"What are you talking about? Are you going to move out?"
"It's not something definitive, I'm going to stay there until he finds a new roommate and come back after that", you take a step back, noticing how close he is to you. "Luckily by then I'll be over you, I think I just need some personal space for now, where you're not there everytime I look, or your things aren't mixed with mine or your scent isn't around every room"
"Will you still speak to me?", he asks, he wants to hug you, to hold you in his arms and say how sorry he is for not feeling the same. But he knows he can't, the best thing he can do is to keep his distance from you right now.
"I think we should keep it restricted to apartment things for now, I'll keep paying my half of the rent since my things will still be here"
"You don't have to pay if you're not here"
Ever since Jisung started making good money he insisted that you didn't have to pay for rent since you only work part time as a tutor to pay for your living expenses but you always refused. Even though he earns a lot more than you it wouldn't be fair for him to be the only one paying and honestly, you felt that if he was the only one paying for it, you would feel too much like you were a couple.
"No, I'll pay you. This arrangement doesn't change the fact that we still share the apartment"
He nods, looking down, the awkward silence making you sick.
"I'm really sorry I hurt you", he whispers and all the crying you avoided over this whole conversation threatens to come out at that exact moment.
"It's not your fault", you say, "I'm sorry I made things awkward, just give me some time and we'll be back to how things were, okay?", you give him a reassuring smile even though you're not sure things will ever go back to the way it was.
You wake up feeling like shit, you cried your eyes out the moment you stepped into Seungmin's apartment. He was so sweet to you, staying awake until you calmed down and even offered you his room for you to sleep but you refused. He was already doing you a favor by letting you stay on his couch until he found a roommate.
You sit, stretching yourself, you slept pretty comfortably but all the stress from last night left your muscles sore.
"Are you feeling better?", you hear Seungmin's voice and look at the kitchen, he's making coffee. That reminds you of all the days you woke Han up with a nice and hot coffee so he wouldn't be in a bad mood waking up so early.
"I don't think so", you answer, shaking your head like that would make your thoughts disappear. "Can you get me some of that?", you ask and he smiles.
"Already on it", you start tidying up the blanket and the pillow you used.
"What are you going to do today?", Seungmin asks while you sit at the table.
"I have some tutoring to do and class in the afternoon, maybe I'll go shopping with Hannah later"
"That's good, try to keep yourself entertained at least for the next couple of days", he hands you the mug and you nod.
All your friends knew about your crush on Han and you made all of them swear they wouldn't tell him. You were afraid things would be awkward now, since Han was their friend before you met them, but they all showed you support now that you had confessed.
Hannah had offered you to stay with her, but she has a roommate that's really strict about everything in their apartment and you don't want to cause trouble to your friend by staying there. Luckily Seungmin's last roommate had moved a couple of weeks ago and he was looking for someone new, but by the way he's picky that's not going to happen so soon.
"Since I'll be staying here and you won't accept money because I won't be using a room, the groceries will be on me and I won't accept no for an answer", you say finishing your coffee and getting up. Seungmin sighs, rolling his eyes.
"I know you're going to buy it anyway, so I'll accept it"
"Then send me a list of whatever you need and I'll buy it tonight or tomorrow", you blow him a kiss, picking your bag from the floor and heading to the bathroom.
You take a long, hot, refreshing shower and pick some comfortable clothes to go to your tutoring session.
Seungmin's already gone when you go back to the kitchen, there's a message from him on your phone.
Minnie: I left some sliced fruit in the fridge for you, eat before going out.
Minnie: I'll send you the list later btw
You smile, having someone taking care of you is nice. For a second, it makes you forget the reason why you're there to begin with.
You feel like crying again, but you can't show up to your students house with red eyes and a puffy face.
The parents that are near each other usually ask you to teach their children together in longer sessions. That strengthens the bond the kids have while strengthening the connection between the families. That usually happens when the families are wealthy, they see an opportunity in their children's friendship to get on each other's good side.
Your parents started hanging out with Jisung's parents too, not because of connections but because you two were always in each other's houses. Once, you broke your arm falling from a tree you tried to climb following Han, his mother had to call yours and calm her down on the phone the entire time your mother was driving to the hospital to meet you. That day you got scolded by both and after they finished the lecture they looked at each other and smiled, bonding over the fear of something happening to their precious child.
When they went out to buy some coffee and talk, Jisung sat by the side of your hospital bed, lips pouting and tearing up.
"I'm sorry I dared you to follow me all the way up there", he says, taking the hand of your good arm and holding it.
"It's okay, now at least I have an exciting story to tell the others", you say and he smiles, whipping his eyes.
The noise of the gate opening wakes you up from your daydream, you have to stop thinking about Han if you want to get over him.
The kids come running in your direction the moment the housekeeper opens the door.
"Miss Y/N, look I got a 9.5 on my test", the girl smiles brightly showing you the paper with the grade marked in red.
"Woah, Misu, you're so smart, I don't think you even need me anymore", you bend to her height and she pouts, sometimes she acts like a little child when she's already 12.
"Of course I need you, you're the prettiest and smartest person I know", she says and you hear someone clear their throats by the stairs. It's Misu's mother.
"If I didn't agree with her I'd be hurt", she says and you smile.
"Good morning, Mrs. Kim, I only helped a little, Misu's really smart", you say and the girl shows you her white teeth, looking at her mother and waiting for some praise.
"Of course she is", she pats the girl's head. "Eun, aren't you going to say hi to Y/N?"
The boy is a few months younger than Misu but a lot more shy. You saw him coming with her when you arrived but got so engrossed in your conversation that forgot he was there in silence.
"Hello, miss Y/N", he says, polite as ever.
"Hi, Eun, did you get a good grade like Misu?"
He nods, showing you his test with 9.8 marked in red.
"He's smarter than me", Misu pouts.
"Congratulations, Eun", you say, patting his head, making him blush and you smile. "I think you are both really smart and I'm here to help you get even smarter"
Mrs. Kim tells you to go ahead and start the lesson and invites you to stay for lunch. You were pretty lucky with the parents you met till now, all of them were nice to you and cared a great deal about their children so it's a lighthearted job to do.
The kids are indeed smart, usually you don't have to explain the same thing more than twice and they always ask a lot of questions during your time with them.
A week goes by since you last saw Jisung, fortunately he didn't try contacting you. You're sure that if he did you'd break hearing his voice and would beg for him to like you back, giving up on any pride you still have left.
You arrive at school an hour before your classes begin, you're meeting Hannah at the cafe nearby so you can talk a bit.
You look at your phone, there's a message from her saying she's on the bus but the traffic is awful so she might be a little bit late.
You choose a table by the window, contemplating if you should order already or wait till Hannah arrives.
Looking outside, you remember the moment you heard the news that you got into this university. Yours and Jisung's family were at your parents house, you both were seated on the couch when you received the message saying the college entrance results came out. You couldn't type your information, you were trembling so much Han had to do it for you.
When you read your name and the word "accepted" you actually screamed, making your mother drop the plate she had in hands. Your father and Han's came running to see what happened when Jisung showed them the screen.
Your mother and father embraced you, telling how proud they were of you and Jisung's parents did the same, like you were their own daughter.
Jisung wrapped his arms around your waist and lifted you up, spinning you and making you burst out laughing. That moment was so good, you wanted to stay there forever.
"Earth to Y/N", you hear Hanna's voice and snap out of your thoughts, sighing. "Is everything okay?", she asks, worried.
"Yeah, I'm good", you say and she narrows her eyes, knowing you are not telling the truth.
Hannah left it at that though, you are going through a hard time and she doesn't want to push it.
Honestly, she don't expect you to be fine. Your lifelong crush had rejected you and to make things worse he is your best friend, so yeah, of course you are not okay.
"Then, I'm going to order", she drops her bag in the seat in front of you, "your usual?"
You nod, seeing her walk to the cashier. You met Hannah three years ago, when you started college. She's the total opposite of you, really outgoing and a total social butterfly, it seems those are the people you attract seeing how Han is the same.
She sat by your side on the first day, making a random joke and making you laugh, that's how she became your best friend. You didn't even have to tell her about your one sided love, she had to see only one interaction between you and Jisung to know exactly what was going on.
She is the one that urged you to tell him about your feelings and was very adamant about you moving on from him, she couldn't let you waste all your 20's being in love with someone that didn't like you back… or not the way you wanted to.
"So, I heard about a party", Hannah says, putting the pager on the table and sitting in front of you.
"There's like a hundred of those, you have to be more specific", you joke and she rolls her eyes.
"You know that guy from English literature? The one that dyed his hair pink last semester?"
"Yeah, it's kinda hard to forget about him", you laugh.
When Yunho came to school with pink hair a rumor of him becoming an idol started going around, everyone tried to be nice to him and all that shit but it turned out he just lost a bet.
"He's hosting this party in like a really big fancy place to celebrate his graduation", she finishes.
"That's nice", you say, fidgeting with your fingers under the table.
"Hmmm, are we going to go or what?", she asks and you glance at her.
"Were we invited?"
"Ahm, you're hot and I'm hot, why wouldn't we be invited?"
You laugh, knowing what she's doing. Hannah is more sensible than you give her credit for, you really thought she would ask about everything that happened on that night, but instead she has been trying to distract you for the past week and that is really nice of her.
She smiles, seeing you smile. Hannah knows you never give enough credit to yourself, you never think you're pretty enough, funny enough, cool enough or smart enough even though you're those things and much more. She approached you on your first day because there's just something about you, something bright and cheerful. When people are upset, mad or sad you always do your best to make them feel better, so Hannah felt this was her time to cheer you up.
The pager buzzes on the table and she gets up, going to the counter to get your orders.
You look at her coming back with a big grin in her lips, handing you the coffee with a note glued to the cup sleeve.
"To the girl with the yellow cardigan, I see you coming here often and I think you're cute, maybe we can hangout sometime? If you're up to it, text me: xxx xxxx-xxxx"
You blush, looking at the counter and seeing the cutest guy looking at you with flushed cheeks. He's so red you can see it from where you're seated. He smiles waving at you and you wave back.
Hannah has one eyebrow lifted looking at your interaction and you feel your cheeks even hotter.
"So, are you going to text him?", she asks, reading the note and you sigh.
"I don't think so", you say, sipping at your coffee.
"Why not?"
"I don't think it would be fair to someone if I start something with them when I'm still in love with someone else", you answer and Hannah sighs.
"Yeah, you have a point", she pouts, "but like, maybe messing around a little won't hurt? I mean, he's not in love with you or anything, you can talk with each other and see where things go"
Hannah's right and you know it. Even though it's still too soon, you should try meeting new people, you're not going to get over Han just by staying away from him.
This feelings, you have it with you for so long, it's hard to let it go. Loving Han is the only romantic feeling you have ever known, it's scary to walk off of this thing you know so well  to something completely new.
You have to, though. It's the only way for your friendship to keep existing. So you nod to Hannah, taking your phone out of your pocket and dialing the number written on the cup, seconds later you're typing a message.
You: Hey, it's the girl in the yellow cardigan, my name is Y/N btw
You send and hear a ping, you thought he would have his phone on silent mode and sudden embarrassment creeps up when you see him taking his phone out of the pocket of his apron.
Cute guy: Hey, I was afraid of making you uncomfortable, so let me apologize first. I just didn't know how to approach you
Cute guy: Ah, and I'm Heeseung
You change the name in his contact before replying.
You: it didn't make me uncomfortable and thank you for calling me cute.
Heeseung: you don't have to thank me for telling the truth.
You giggle, it's interesting to feel like this, even though you can tell it's something temporary.
You: lol, you're really smooth.
"Let's go?", Hannah says, smirking at you and you blush. You nod, picking your things up and getting up from the table, you wave goodbye to Heeseung before going out and he smiles brightly at you.
>><<
The morning after you went away, Han woke up feeling awful, all the things that happened the previous night coming back at him at the same time. He was sure the moment you walked out of the door, giving him your best smile and trying not to cry was the saddest he ever felt in his entire life. You were his best friend, you were everything to him, he felt like shit because he never noticed your feelings. He doesn't know what he would have done if he knew, but maybe he could have been better, talking less about his relationships and especially not bringing his hook ups to the apartment.
He got up, feeling like crying everytime he had to pass by your bedroom door, knowing you were not there and wouldn't be for far too long, all because of him. The bell rings and he runs to the door, hoping it's you, hoping you'll tell him everything was a joke and that you didn't actually like him. Even though he knows you wouldn't press the doorbell since you know the password and he knows the hurt in your eyes when he said he didn't feel the same as you was no joke.
So it was no surprise when he opened the door and found Chan and Changbin there. They did tell him they were going to stop by in the morning to pick him up but with all the things that happened he just forgot about it.
"Are you okay? You look like shit", Changbin says entering the house.
Chan looks at Han, worried.
"Are you sick?", he asks, "where's Y/N?" He knows you wouldn't leave Han alone if he were sick, but you would have shown up already by hearing Changbin's loud voice.
"She's gone", Han says, running his hands through his hair.
"What do you mean?", Chan asks with wide eyes.
"She- she confessed to me and I turned her down", he says, maybe he should have told you he could like you back, that way he wouldn't be feeling this way and you'd still be there with him.
"Shit", Changbin says, his lips pressed in a thin line.
Han looks at the both of them, why don't they look surprised?
"You guys knew about it?" He asks, a little louder than his usual voice and the boys exchange a look. "Woah, thanks for the heads up"
He shouldn't be mad at them, it's not their fault, but he's already too mad at himself so he doesn't know where else to put the blame.
"It was not our place to tell you", Chan says.
"Does everyone know?", Han asks and Changbin nods, "so I was the only one? Am I dumb or something?"
Chan sighs, "it's not really your fault for not knowing, you probably are used to the way Y/N looks and talks to you because you're best friends since you were children, but to the people outside it is pretty clear from the get go that she likes you"
"But where did she go? Are you not friends anymore?", Changbin asks the difficult questions and Chan glares at him.
"She said she will be staying with Seungmin till he finds a roommate and then she's going to come back"
"She probably just needs some time", Chan says, putting a hand on Han's shoulder trying to reassure him, and he really hopes that's the case.
>><<
You've been texting Heeseung for a few days now and he's pretty nice, he's a dance major and works part time at the cafe to pay for living expenses the same as you do with tutoring.
Hannah had convinced you to go to Yunho's party and get wasted, saying you need the college life experience the most now that you had your first heartbreak but you don't want to think about that, you want to forget that you ever loved Han Jisung.
So you drink a whole bottle of wine before leaving for the party, Seungmin's coming with you and Hannah will meet you there. You are looking good, or maybe it's the alcohol that makes you feel good, your hair is down, you're wearing a black lace cropped top you borrowed from Hannah, with a much lower neckline than you are used to, high waisted jeans and black boots.
The party is already crowded when you and Seungmin get there and it's really a fancy place like Hannah told you.
"Let's grab a drink", you yell to Seungmin.
"You should drink water, you're already drunk", he demands and you show your tongue to him.
"Nooooo, don't be a killjoy"
He sighs, it's hard to convince you of something when you're sober, it's even harder when you're drunk.
"You can have a drink after you drink a cup of water", he tells you and you nod, sounds like a win win for you.
After drinking a whole cup of water you show it to him, waiting for a praise and Seungmin rolls his eyes. What are you, a 10 year old?
"Good job, now you can drink", he gives you a cup with something mixed in it, "but you have to drink some water for each drink you take, okay?"
"Okay, dad", you joke, sipping your drink.
Seungmin knows a lot of people at the party and you feel left out every time someone approaches him so you're really happy when Hannah shows up, with a much taller boy accompanying her.
"Look who I found", she says pointing at him.
"Heeseung?", you scream, startling Seungmin who's close to you.
"Jesus, Y/N, calm down", he says putting his hand over his ear, "I'm a singer, I can't lose my hearing", he says and you pout, whining an apology even though you know he's not really mad.
"I didn't know you were gonna be here", Heeseung gets closer to you, side eyeing Seungmin.
"I didn't want to come, Hannah made me", you tell him, "this is Seungmin, he's my friend"
He nods at the boy by your side, relaxing to hear you call Seungmin a friend.
"Hey, Minnie, let's go dance?", Hannah says and Seungmin narrows his eyes suspiciously.
"I don't dance", he answers, crossing his arms and she sighs.
"For fucking sake, just come with me", she says and Seungmin follows her without more questions, he knows too well not to mess with her when she gets angry.
"You look really pretty", Heeseung says, bending a little to lessen the difference in your height. You blush even though it's not as good hearing him saying that as it was when Han complimented you, but you're trying to get over that, aren't you?
"Thanks, you look hot too", you hiccup, you don't have a filter when you're drunk. He smiles, turning around on the table and pouring you a cup of water.
"Drink this, it's going to help", he hands it to you.
"Thank you, you're so sweet and handsome", you yell again but he doesn't flinch like Seungmin did.
"You can't keep saying these kinds of things and not want me to kiss you", he says and you smile, sly.
"Who says I don't want that?", the moment he comprehends what you just said his face reddens, and he thought he was being bold.
"Once you sober up we can talk about that", he tells you and you pout. You wanted to kiss him now, maybe if you did all the hurt you were feeling would go away. Maybe you just needed someone to make you forget about Jisung.
"But I want it now", you cross your arms, behaving like a child that didn't get their way.
"Do you like dancing?", he changes the subject. Your face brightens with his question.
"I LOVE dancing", you show him the choreography to queencard that's playing on the dance floor and he laughs at your messy steps, he's sure you're much better at it while sober.
"Then drink this and let's dance", he hands you another cup of water.
"Seungmin told me I could have a drink after a cup of water, but this makes two cups of water and no drink", you point out and Heeseung can't help but find the drunk you really cute.
"This water will help you so you won't have a bad hangover tomorrow", he says and you nod, that's a good point.
Super by seventeen starts playing and you finish downing the water, grabbing Heeseung's hand and dragging him to the dance floor.
Being a dance major, of course he knows the steps and he's so good there are moments you just stop and watch him in a daze. Actually, he knows the steps to every song playing after that too, you dance so much you're all sweaty and your legs are tired. You're totally sober now, feeling ecstatic. It's so good being at a party having so much fun.
You're jumping and smiling until you see him.
You stop in your tracks seeing Han Jisung staring at you from the other side of the dance floor, your smile fades away as soon as your eyes lock with his.
He looks sick, he lost a lot of weight considering the short period of time you haven't seen each other and he wasn't smiling like he always did. He takes a step in your direction and you automatically step away, your stomach sinking.
You're feeling your heart beat so fast it's overlapping with the loud music, you gulp feeling your legs weaken, why the hell are you having this reaction? He's the same Han Jisung you've known since you were a child, the only difference now is that he knows how you feel about him.
You can't avoid him until you get over your feelings, that won't work and you know it, you have to get used to being near him feeling nothing other than friendship, but you can't see him at that moment, you just can't. You're having fun, there's a handsome guy with you and you want to like him and not Jisung.
You grab Heeseung's hand and pull him away from the dance floor, walking outside so you can breathe some fresh air.
"Did something happen?", he asks, looking confused and worried.
"It just felt stiff in there for a moment", you say and he nods.
You didn't want to explain to him why you were not speaking to your best friend and how messed up your relationship with Han is right now. You want to forget about it and your way of doing it is right by your side, handsome and available.
"So, about that thing you said we could do once I sobered up… I'm sober now", you say and he blushes, analyzing you for a moment to see if you are telling the truth.
The last drink you took was more than an hour ago and you drank so much water after that, it's a miracle you still don't have to use the toilet.
"I don't want to do something you'll regret later", he says and you appreciate how considerate he is. But right now you don't want someone considerate, you want someone that'll sweep you off your feet and help you forget what you so desperately want to. So you get closer, caging him against the wall and tiptoeing, trying to get closer to his face.
"If you don't want to, it's okay. But if you're holding back because you think I'm drunk, I'm not", that was his cue to kiss you. His lips crashing sloppily onto yours, hands cupping your face then moving down to your waist. You wrap your arms around his neck trying to get closer than you already are. He's good, you've kissed enough people in your life to know that, yet you feel sick.
You feel bad and like a horrible person because you just know he can't compare to Jisung even though you never kissed your best friend.
You feel bad thinking about someone else while kissing Heeseung, he's so nice and sweet and you know he's not fooling around, if you give him the chance he's going to truly like you and you're only using him.
You step away sighing, seeing his brows furrowed and the confusion in his eyes.
"Was it that bad?", he jokes but you can see he's feeling hurt. "I'm not trying to brag, but I never got a reaction like that after a kiss"
You smile apologetically, looking for words to explain yourself.
"It was great and you're great", you begin, "I think you're too sweet, that's why I can't lead you on"
"What are you talking about?" he asks, even more confused.
"I'm in love with someone else and I know it sounds awful, I did try to get over him with you but I feel like you'll really like me if we don't stop right now and I'm not sure if I'll be able to be that person for you", you look at him, seeing the disappointment in his face. "I'm sorry, I'm a terrible person and you can hate me if you want"
He stares at you for a few moments, sighing and giving you a reassuring smile after.
"I don't think you're terrible, I think you're truly brave for coming clean like that", you're relieved, you were afraid he would say something mean and even though you feel like you deserve it, you're really fragile right now. "Thank you for telling me before I got too deep into this and I don't know, maybe we can be friends?"
"Absolutely, I would love that"
"So, do you want to go back inside?", he asks and you shake your head.
"I don't think so, I should probably go home", you say, you don't want to go back there to see Han again.
"Do you want me to take you home?"
"It's okay, I'm going to text Seungmin and see where he's at but you can go inside, I'm going to stay here and get some more fresh air"
"Alright, I'll see you at the cafe"
You nod, seeing him walk away. Woah, you just let that masterpiece of a man go because you can't forget about a fucking unrequited love. You curse yourself, slapping your forehead.
After that, you text Seungmin telling where you are and asking where the hell he and Hannah went, sending the same message to her and waiting for their answer.
You sit on the grass, taking a deep breath. You feel a bit sick after seeing Jisung, you never thought you'd feel that way. Never in your worst nightmares did you think you would be afraid to talk to him, maybe you're scared of talking to him and feeling nothing, what if all of this was just in your head and you just needed some time apart to figure it out?
You hear steps close to you and pray it's not some horny couple trying to fuck near you, however, the moment you lay eyes on your best friend you actually wish it was a horny couple.
You get up in a jump, your stomach sinking and your head spinning. Why does it hurt so much suddenly? It feels like your chest is being torn apart and you can't do a thing to make it better.
Jisung looks worse up close, he has huge bags under his eyes and he's too pale.
You're worried about him, even though you can't have the luxury of that. Not when your insides are all messed up and you want to throw up. You walk past him without saying a word, you can't handle this right now, but he grabs your wrist holding you in place. You don't look at him, staring at the floor trying to get out of his grip.
"I miss you", he says and your heart drops to your stomach. Why is he doing this to you? It's not like being apart from your best friend is fun to you. "Can't you look at me?", he pleads but you can't find the courage to do that yet. "Please", but he sounds so desperate, you force yourself to do it.
You look at him, he's obviously drunk. Who the hell let him drink this much?
"What is it?", you sound more spiteful than you were planning and his eyes widen, releasing your arm from his grasp.
"Do you hate me now?", he asks and you sigh.
"Of course I don't hate you, you're my best friend", you say that but for some reason it doesn't feel right, it doesn't sound like the truth.
"Can't you come back home? I feel like shit everytime I wake up and you're not there"
"I told you I need time", you say, running your hands through your hair.
"Are you going to forget about me by fucking some random dude?", he asks and you glare at him, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
"I don't understand how that's any of your business"
"It is, because you told me you love me but you act like you never want to see my face again", he scoffs.
You feel mad, what's he trying to say? Should you keep hurting just because you love him?
"I can't sit around forever, waiting for you to look at me", you say and he steps closer to you.
"I'm looking at you right now, I- I'll be good to you, I'll like you back", the moment he finishes saying that, you can't control the tears running through your eyes.
Is that supposed to be good? He would be forced to date you so he could have you close to him?
"Why are you doing this to me?" You ask and he takes a step back startled with you tears, suddenly sobering up, "it's not easy for me to be away from you, you're my best friend, but I do have some bit of dignity left in me and I won't accept less than I deserve, even if that less is the man I love with me", you wipe your tears seeing him step closer, trying to reach your hand and you step away, "don't come close to me right now, I could never stay with you knowing you don't love me, you should know that"
You turn around trying to get away from him but stop on your tracks seeing Hannah, Seungmin, Chan and Changbin right there looking at you awkwardly. Of course, the humiliation is the cherry on the top. You pass through them feeling so embarrassed you want the earth to swallow you.
The ride home is awkward and silent. Hannah and Seungmin keep exchanging looks while you look out the window trying to figure how your life became this mess.
You really should have dated Jeongho when he asked you out in middle school, it was around that time that you realized you liked Han more than just a friend—when Haneul asked to be his date to the school festival and you wanted to punch her so hard. Maybe if you had dated that boy at that time you would have forgotten the feelings you had for your friend, maybe you would have brushed it off as some childhood crush, but no, you rejected Jeongho while Han went with Haneul to the school festival and you third wheeled the whole event earning nasty glances from her every time your best friend played two times the same game so he could win you a plush too.
Back then you still thought everything would be okay, if only you had him everything would be okay.
You start bawling without notice, crying so much you can't even breathe. Seungmin stops the car and Hannah gets to the back, hugging you and caressing your hair while whispering that everything will be fine and you really want to believe her.
You don't know how you got into Seungmin's apartment, you guess he carried you inside after dropping Hannah home but you're not sure. It's sunday so he's not up yet for you to ask and it doesn't actually matter, what matters is the absolutely pathetic scene you made at the party and in the car. You want to bury yourself into a hole and never come back, how the hell are you going to face your friends after they saw you being humiliated by Han like that?
You know he was drunk, of course he was. You know he didn't mean it, he was hurt and drunk and people act on feelings not reason when they are like that. But does he think you have no pride? Does he really think you would date him knowing he doesn't like you back?
It's different when you confessed to him, you knew he didn't like you that way. But if he told you that there was something there, that he was not going to promise you anything but someday he may like you back, that's all you needed to hear. However, that didn't happen. He told you with all the words that he doesn't like that way, that he doesn't feel the same way as you do, there was no room for interpretation, no room for what if's.
You get up, in need to distract yourself. This week is going to fly by, you have tutoring lessons using up all your free time so you just have to get through the day.
There are a lot of messages on your phone, you really don't want to read them because you know that other than Hannah's, it's awkward comforting words from your other friends.
Hannah: call me when you wake up
Hannah: let's go eat something delicious, what do you think? It's on me.
Hannah: are you still not up or are you ignoring me?
You: I just woke up, calm down girl
You: why would I ignore you though? I just have to brush my teeth and eat something then I'll call you.
Binnie: morning babes
Binnie: Hannie is such an asshole
Binnie: I'll date you if you want, you're hot it's a win win for me
You chuckle to Changbin texts, he's so sweet in the weirdest way.
You: I mean, you're hot too
You: I think we'd make an awesome couple
Chan: good morning, Y/N
Chan: we didn't hear anything last night, so please, don't be awkward or embarrassed around us.
You: good morning Channie, I know you heard
You: you should have matched your story with Changbin before texting me though
You: it's okay, alright? Of course I'll be embarrassed for the time being, but we're friends I won't be embarrassed forever.
You leave your phone on the couch and go to the bathroom. You look like shit, smeared makeup, hair disgusting and you're still wearing the same clothes. You turn on the hot water, taking your clothes off and entering the shower, the warmth embracing you as you feel more relaxed.
You put on something comfortable, it's Sunday, you're going to ask Hannah to come by and you're going to order takeout.
You call her number while eating because you know she's anxious.
"Hey babes, good morning", she picks up, cheerful as always.
"Good morning", you say, biting the toast you just made.
"So, what about going out and eating something really good?", she asks.
"Hm, I'm actually not in the mood to go out? Can't you come by, we order something and watch that movie you've been bugging me for the last month?"
"Yeah, sure. We can do that", she answers and you are happy she doesn't sound upset or disappointed. With all the shit you're pulling lately you're scared your friends are going to get tired of your bullshit and stop talking to you. You used to think no one wanted a friend that's always crying and whining, but they showed you that real friends help each other.
"So what time are you gonna come?"
"I will just take a shower and wait for the bus, so in maybe like an hour?", she guesses and you nod forgetting she can't see you.
"Okay, see you then"
You decide to clean the house while waiting, Seungmin is pretty organized and clean so there's nothing too difficult. You'll just wash the dishes and vacuum a little.
Hannah arrives later than she predicted, Seungmin is already up and cleaning his room. He scolded you because it's his day to do the dishes and you shouldn't have done it because it's not fair to you.
You think he's being extra nice to you because of what happened the night before and it's true, he was really scared when you cried in his car.
He has known you for almost five years and he never saw you cry like that, even on the night you came to his house after confessing to Han you didn't cry like that. This time was different, you had a soul crushing cry, he wanted to stop the car and go to the back to hug you the same as Hannah, but he knew you were already being comforted by the perfect person.
Han is his friend, he could never choose between you two. But he couldn't deny it, that was a dick move, how could he ever say that to someone that likes him? He basically told you that he could pretend to like you if you stayed with him.
And of course, Seungmin understands the fear of losing a friend, but doing what he did just increases the chances of you never wanting to see his face again.
You are seated on the couch, watching the movie Hannah is obsessed with at the moment. She already watched it five times alone and asks anyone she can find to watch it again with her, she even repeats some sentences together with the characters.
The pizza you ordered is almost gone, you didn't know you were so hungry until the smell hit your nose. Luckily or thanks to Seungmin and Heeseung, your hangover is not that bad and you want it to stay that way so you keep drinking lots of water.
You got through the day thanks to your friends, they kept you entertained the whole time so you wouldn't overthink or even think about Han.
You are doing that just now, looking at the ceiling in the dark room. You want it all to be a dream, maybe you would wake up tomorrow and still be in middle school, you'd take the opportunity and get over him at that time, that would have spared you of some big problems.
----------------
A/N: So, I don't know how many parts this fic will have. If you like what I write please reblog or let me know in the comments, feedback give me motivation to keep writing.
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6okuto · 1 year
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WEDDING MOMENTS
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gn!reader | kuroo, bokuto, akaashi, hinata, atsumu, osamu, ushijima
hello everyone i'm back 🫶 these are more reception moments than wedding but y'know. give me a break man...
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KUROO leans in and whispers in your ear as you dance, “is it bad i want to go home and just lie in bed with you now?” “why are you whispering as if someone can hear you?” you snicker back. tetsurou shoots you a cheeky smile. “so it looks like i’m saying something romantic.” you hit his shoulder, and he only laughs before pulling you into a tight hug. you wait for him to let go before replying. “idiot. but no, it isn’t. my back and feet hurt.” he hums, and you can feel his fingers tapping your back. “do you think it’s possible for newly weds to sneak out of their own wedding reception?”
BOKUTO is walking down the aisle again as everyone disperses to talk or get ready for the reception. you walk up to him, curiosity piqued as he bends down. “what are you doing?” “huh?” he drops a few petals that he was clutching. “crap—hi, baby. i’m just, uh, picking up some of the flowers to take with us. i saw someone do it online, and i thought we could press them or put them somewhere,” he explains softly, as if a little embarrassed. your heart flutters at the thought, and you smile before reaching down yourself. “we better get some flowers, then. and a ziploc bag or something.”
AKAASHI relaxes and rests his head against yours while you watch your guests mingling and dancing. you reach for his hand and intertwine fingers. “you okay?” he nods in response and presses a chaste kiss to your jaw. “yeah, i can finally calm down and not worry about something terrible happening.” “mm, something terrible could still happen.” “love of my life, can you please give your husband a break?” keiji blows air against your skin, eliciting a laugh from you. his tone is light, and you can feel him smiling even while you apologize.
HINATA takes one of the polaroid cameras that you got for the guests. you watch as he poses and takes a picture of himself before handing it to you. “do you want me to take a selfie?” he nods with a grin. “yeah! and also sign it so i can put it in my wallet, or maybe the back of my phone?” his sentence ends as a question to himself. you get your phone so you can check your appearance before mimicking your now husband’s pose. “sho, i swear if mine is bad i want a redo,” you say. he sputters as he looks at his forming photo. “well that’s good because i definitely screwed mine up. i’m like half in the frame.”
ATSUMU’s knee bounces as the video of your relationship the both of you got done nears its end. you shoot him a look, but he doesn’t seem to notice, gaze fixed on the scene. that’s when you hear a familiar voice, but unfamiliar clip start to play. “it’s, fuck, what day is it? november 13, and i’m pretty sure i need t’look for an engagement ring,” your now husband says into the camera. you gape, shock evident across your face. atsumu’s voice is soft as he says your name. “i love you, really. and if you’re seeing this then i didn’t fuck this up, and you decided to marry me, and i’m probably ‘bout to have a heart attack,” he nervously laughs. you turn to atsumu next to you, whose face is flushed red. “don’t look at me, the video isn’t done yet.”
OSAMU keeps holding your hand, and if he isn’t holding it he’s probably thinking of doing so. you don’t mind, finding comfort in the way he rubs the back of it. you’re sitting together when he silently reaches for it again. “i’m pretty sure you’ve held my hand more today than this entire week.” osamu rolls his eyes but smiles. you stare as he gently takes hold of your ring and fidgets with it. “sorry, can’t stop thinkin’ about how we’re actually married now.” you stare at each other, and he rests his chin in his palm. with his other hand, he brings yours up to press gentle kisses against the ring and your skin. “just another excuse to stay close t’you.”
USHIJIMA looks over when you poke his shoulder, and quickly realizes you’re trying to feed him some cake. “say ahh,” you sing song. it’s a half-joke, and you don’t fully expect him to accept, but he leans forward and opens his mouth, hand underneath the fork to catch any crumbs. despite his serious expression and stature, you can't help but think he looks cute. “i know we picked this flavour, but does it taste good?” you ask. wakatoshi nods. “it was a good choice.” he gets a forkful for who you assume is himself. but instead he lifts it toward you. “do you want to try now?”
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aphrogeneias · 8 months
Text
...right? — one-shot
pairing: eddie munson x fem!reader (modern!au)
summary: you're not sure of where you stand with eddie munson, but you're forced to confront your feelings after almost losing him.
word count: 3k
warnings: fluff and angst with a happy ending. jealous!reader. feelings of self-doubt. eddie munson is a sweetheart.
author's note: this one has been a long time in the making, and it may be a little melodramatic, but i'm doing a lot of self-projecting here, so be nice. thank you to @intrepidacious for reading it for me and giving me your approval <3 i'm sorry to all the girls named emma reading this, but i had to give that character a name.
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We're performing tonight, if you want to stop by.
You'd been staring at this message for a couple of minutes now, unsure of what to do. You seemed to be in this dilemma a lot, as of late — to answer or not to answer, to show or not to show.
Too scared to show how you felt, but too scared to lose him at the same time.
Zoned out, you caught Robin’s hand flying in your direction from your peripheral. “Stop looking at your phone!”
She snatched it from your hand, still open in your conversation with Eddie. Robin whistled when she took a look at your screen, “Oh, I see. How are things with Mr. Headbanger?”
“You're talking to Eddie?” Chrissy chimed in from her side of the bed, lifting herself on one elbow to see you better with Robin between you.
The three of you had been like this all night, spread out on Chrissy’s queen bed, a sequence of old romantic comedies playing on her TV. There was an empty pizza box on her fuzzy carpet, and a half finished bottle of wine next to it, the second of the night.
You groan, trying to get your phone back to no avail. “Things have been… well, I think. Too well. I guess I've just been waiting for the other shoe to drop.”
Then, it was their time to groan.
Your friends like calling you jaded, but you consider yourself a realist.
It's been a topic of conversation between you for years. Ever since your last relationship ended, after you'd been left for another woman, when you swore off love for good — at first, they thought you were just grieving, it would take time to heal, of course, but you never really did.
You don't think you've ever been anything other than an open wound, in that sense, even before your ex. The high walls that were meant to protect you eventually became a prison you couldn't get out of. A princess and a dragon, all in one.
That is until Eddie Munson came into your life.
No one's ever made you want to drop those walls as much as he does. You'd met him through Chrissy, who’d been his friend since high school, and at first you thought he wasn't really flirting with you. He seemed to always be flirting with everyone, always getting a little too close. Until he asked you out, and you were still not convinced.
It could be a friend date. He could be after one of other friends. Maybe he was just passing time until he found someone better.
That was a few months ago, and Eddie hasn't gone anywhere.
He had a few shirts on your place, merch from various bands which you were growing fond of listening to them in his car. Shirts you would wear to bed when he wasn't spending the night, curling into bed with his smell on you. He'd made friends with your cat, and fixed your coffee in the morning the way you liked it, and left strands of hair loose in your shower.
A brave knight, that Eddie is.
Despite your closeness, and the honesty you see in his eyes whenever you're near him, neither one of you has put a name on what you have. It keeps you up at night, thoughts about calling him your boyfriend and have him laughing at your face. How could you be so stupid?
The thought of it brings tears to your eyes.
“What if that's it, though?” Chrissy interjects, with a gentle voice. Her small hand reached for yours, and gives it a reassuring squeeze. “What if there's no other intentions, no other shoe to drop? You have no reason not to trust him.”
“You say that because he's your friend.”
“Chris is right, babe.” Robin says, sitting straighter on the bed. “He’s never given you any reason to think like that. You need to let yourself go, just this once.”
You sigh, and mumble something along the lines of “Easier said than done,” as you sit up and pull your knees to rest your chin on them.
“You should go, by the way.”
Robin reaches to you with your phone in hand, handling it back to you. Her blue eyes are kind, understanding. Chrissy smiles from her place between you.
“Our local rockstar is waiting for you.”
You respond Eddie with a short omw <3 before your friends are pushing you out of your stupor, and into the street.
They’ve already finished their set by the time you arrive at The Hideout.
You're dressed entirely inappropriate for a dive bar full of metalheads and middle-aged bikers, but you don't let yourself think too much about it because no one really notices you coming in, except for the bouncer who compliments you on your old college sweatshirt.
The night is well beyond starting. The bar is full, and it takes you a while to find Eddie, but when you do, he finds you immediately.
He's at the foot of the stage, talking to his friends. The rest of the band is around too, and you wave at them as Eddie makes his way towards you. The smile that pulls on your lips is uncontrollable when he, with an excited smile of his own, takes you in his arms, wrapping himself around you. “Hi! You just missed the show!”
“I'm sorry! I was at Chrissy’s.”
You take a second to look at him closely. His wild hair is a little damp, and his Accept shirt has the sleeves cut off, which shows more of his tattoos. There's a studded belt on his hips, and you don't think too much before pulling him closer by it.
Eddie kisses you on the forehead, and his lips linger a little bit before pulling away. “Did you tell her I said hi?”
“Forgot to. But next time I'll make sure to send your regards.”
When he's close like this, you almost forget your doubts. When his arm is around your shoulders and he's pulling you close, the smell of his cologne and the last cigarette he smoked before going on stage cling to you, and you cling to it in turn.
“Good, and make sure to arrive on time next time too because we played your favorite and you weren't here.” He pouts dramatically, putting one hand to his chest.
The gasp you let out matches it. “Metal Health? Eddie, no!”
“Eddie, yes!” He shakes you a little, turning you in the direction of the tables. “We played Quiet Riot, and you weren't here to see it. Have to say I'm a little disappointed, sweetheart.”
Walking along with him, you stop when you reach a vacant booth on the corner. Turning to face him fully, you leave a soft kiss on his stubbled chin. “I guess you'll just have to keep playing it, then.”
“Does that mean you'll come to every show?”
There's no space between the two of you, standing chest to chest with each other. The rest of the bar disappears. “I might, if you'll have me.”
“Baby, I'll…”
The bubble you find yourselves in shatters and breaks when Eddie stutters, and turns, because there is someone poking him on the back, disturbing your moment. It's a woman, asking to speak to him.
You don't really register what she's saying. All you know is that you've seen her around before, and you know she's friends with the guys. Eddie apologizes to you as he's being dragged away for a private conversation. “I'll be right back! Don't go far.”
Nodding, you remain frozen in place.
They don't go far, but you can't really tell what they're talking about, but her hand on his forearm, slowly rising to his bicep, tells you everything you need to know.
You don't realize it but you're shaking a little bit, cold sweat prickling through your suddenly frigid skin. There's a ringing in your ears, and a lump growing in your throat, but you can't stop yourself from looking.
He looks beautiful like this. The light from the now empty stage hits his figure from the back, making him look every bit like the rock god he's always aspired to be. The frizz on his hair creates a halo around his head, and you think you might faint.
To his credit, he doesn't get any closer to the girl. Doesn't flirt back. His smile is polite, and he maintains a sensible distance, but that's not enough to ease your mind.
He's only keeping a distance because you're here. Your mind says, always the traitor. You're holding him back. He could be making out with a different girl every night. Maybe he is. Maybe he is and you're none the wiser. Better walk away now. Go, before your heart breaks.
It's already breaking, and you're the culprit.
You almost don't notice Eddie return to you, as your vision’s gone blurry.
“Sorry, Emma wanted to invite me to an after party. Told her I was busy.” There it was, his easy smile again. From a first look, you wouldn't think Eddie Munson smiles so easily, but it's always there, pulling on his full lips and showing off his dimples.
You would smile back, as usual, but it's like your face can't move.
“Just you?” You ask, “Not the rest of the boys?”
He laughs, but there's not much humor behind it. “Just me.”
“Aren’t you gonna say anything?” He is still grinning, raising one eyebrow at you, as if taunting you to speak up. Something rotten spreads through your insides, stirring them, rising like bile right through your opened mouth.
“Say what? It's not like we're dating, Eddie."
If regret could kill, you would be dead the moment you saw his face fall. Eddie's expressiveness is a double-edged sword — his happiness was contagious, but when he’s upset, there is nothing that could distract you from the way his bambi eyes plead to you.
You double down anyway, already feeling like a fool, but too stubborn to take back what you said.
"...right?"
“Is that what you think?” He asks, a pout on his pretty lips. “Is that what you want?”
“I… I don't know.” Your mouth is moving, but it's like you don't have control over what you're saying anymore. Like you can't even hear yourself, too taken by the dread that has taken over your body. “I think… What do you think?”
You throw the question back at him because you can't be the first one to say it. Because if he backs out, if you say what you really want — and it's him, he's all you've ever wanted, and the realization hits you like a punch to the gut — and he says it's never been quite like that, that he doesn't want you the same way, that he's just been passing the time, you would break.
Eddie looks away from you, then. His fingers pinch the bridge of his nose, “You're not sure what you want, is that what you're telling me?”
“No! No, it's not like that.” You almost choke on your own spit, “I'm just…”
Scared. Of opening your heart, of rejection, of him leaving when he learns how much you want him, need him.
“If you're not sure of what you want, I think you should take some time to think about it.”
“But, Eddie, I…”
“Think about it, and call me when you know.”
One of his hands goes to your shoulder, squeezing it, and briefly running thumb over the fabric of your sweatshirt. He's turning around before you can stay anything, the lump in your throat too big to allow you to speak.
The room feels like it's turning upside down as you turn the other way, towards the door. It turns and turns on its axis, and you almost lose your balance as you're making your way out. You wave halfheartedly at the bouncer, who waves back at you in the middle of his conversation with a green haired girl.
Walking home, you have time to think of what you'd just done.
As the tears roll freely through your face, and you wipe them with the end of your sleeves, you think of Eddie’s sullen face, once full of life, now transpiring his disappointment in you. You'd let him down, and it was all your fault.
In an attempt to protect yourself, you pushed him away.
You imagine him back at the bar, with the boys. With Emma, ready to console him after what you just did to him. The thought of it just makes you cry harder, trying to control your breathing as you get closer to your apartment.
You did what you always do. Leave first, turn your back, clam up back into your shell. You just never thought you'd do that to him.
It doesn't take long until you spiral.
You did all you could after you got home. Tried to breathe, but it only made you cry harder. Curled up on the couch with your cat, a brown tabby that curled herself right back into you, and cried until there were no tears left. Ignored your friends’ messages on your phone, pretending everything was all right.
Tried to drink, but felt too sad to even open your fridge. Ran into one of Eddie’s hoodies hanging from the back of a chair in your room, and felt more tears coming, but no strength to cry.
Everything in your room reminded you of him — your unmade bed where he'd be lying on if you didn't screw up, the fantasy book he'd let you borrow on your bedside table, a polaroid of the two of you with your arms around each other serving as a bookmark.
You pick your phone, and it rings and rings. He doesn't answer. In a moment of panic, you leave a message instead, pacing through your room on your bare feet, still wearing the clothes you went out in. The cat on your bed follows your movements with her eyes.
“Hi, Eddie. I… You might not even want to hear from me right now, and I get that. Really, I do, but… You just need to know I know I fucked up. I didn't mean to do you like that, I didn't mean to say those things to you.”
Your voice trembles, just like the hand that's holding your phone to your mouth, but you keep going, “Of course we're dating, we've been dating for a while now. I was too scared to say anything because we never put a label on it and I thought you didn't want anything with me, I guess I just didn't want to be the first one to say it in case you decided this wasn't… that I wasn't… what you wanted.”
There's a few seconds pause as you take a deep breath, and release it in an anguished sigh. “What I'm trying to say is… that I like you. A lot. Have since the beginning. And I understand if you didn't want anything to do with me anymore because of what I just did, but… if you still want to talk, I'm… I'm still here, okay? I'm still here.”
When you're finished, you throw your phone back on your bed, and wait.
You're still pacing around the house, a mug full of tea in hand, when you hear your phone vibrating on your bed. You almost don't pick it up, but you do anyway.
Two notifications from Eddie.
Can I come over?
Are you still up?
Hands shaking, you answer with a simple Yeah. Key’s on the carpet.
The clock on your screen says it's 2:22 AM.
You hear your door opening not too long after that, the spare key turning on the lock, as you're sitting on the couch, writing like a kid that's to be scolded when their parents come home. The mug of tea is half empty at your feet, and now cold, just as your nervous hands as Eddie comes through the door.
Wearing a Metallica sweatshirt, an older one that you've borrowed before, one you know how soft it feels on the skin, he comes in and silently closes the door behind him, leaving the key on a small ceramic plate by it.
You cave in before he can say anything. “I'm sorry.”
Your chin is wobbling again, but you swallow it down, not wanting to make a scene. Eddie comes closer, and sits next to you, careful not to kick the mug that you left carelessly on the floor.
“No, I'm sorry. I should have said something, I should have told you what you meant to me sooner. You know… I've been calling you my girlfriend to everyone but to the person who matters the most.”
“Everyone?” You repeat, “Everyone who?”
“The guys. At work. Wayne…”
“You told your uncle I'm your girlfriend?” The word feels foreign in your tongue, but not unpleasant. Eddie looks sheepish, but the corner of his mouth twitches and lifts just a bit, one of those dimples you love making an appearance in your dimly lit living room.
“Yeah. Like I said, everyone but the one who matters the most.”
There it is. That earnestness, pouring through him, warming you up from the inside out.
“And I guess… Am I the person you mean?”
“Who else would it be?” He's tilting his head now, kind eyes aimed at you. You huff a weak laugh, them, relief hitting you in waves. Not thinking too much, you throw yourself at him, hugging him by the shoulders, and folding your legs under your thighs to be closer to him.
“I'm still sorry, though. Sorry that I made you think I had doubts, or that I…”
Eddie doesn't let you finish, shushing you with a hand on the back of your head, and another wrapping around your waist, keeping you in place. “It's okay, sweetheart. I'm sorry too.”
“Since we're both sorry, does anyone have to be sorry at all?” You mumble into his shoulder, taking in his smell through his clothes. It soothes you more than anything can, along with his voice vibrating through his chest, and the warmth of his body clinging to yours.
“I think we can discuss the details in the morning.”
He seals it with a kiss to your temple. You and your boyfriend sleep on that same couch, and in the morning, there is nothing left to say.
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moonydustx · 4 months
Note
Hi, I was wondering if you could do Zoro, Ace, Luffy, Law, Crocodile, King, and 2 Characters of your choice x Reader, where they and Reader are having a romantic moment and just when the moment is just right, something or someone interrupts the romantic scene?
ok, ok, I know, I'm really late with this one. But life is so chaotic that I won't even look for excuses hahah but I really liked your request. I think some came out a little less romantic? I don't know, I'll leave it for your evaluation. I hope you enjoy!
warnings were placed individually in each of the stories.
F!Reader x Zoro, Ace, Luffy, Law, Crocodile, King and Smoker (placed individually)
requests here | rules and guides | masterlist
Comments, reblogs and likes are greatly appreciated.
Zoro
warnings: mentions of previous fights/problems with an enemy pirate. Zoro is very direct with his feelings. Mentions of drinking (we have Zoro in this one, so it's kind of obligatory)
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Another victory, another time to rest in some bar.
Taking the opportunity to explore the new island after solving yet another series of problems, you and your companions chose to stuff their faces - and especially Luffy and Chopper, fill their bellies with food - in a bar they found there.
However, something still stirred you. The encounter with an enemy pirate that afternoon and the way he had spoken to you still affected you. It still made you see your position on the team as shallow, expendable, unnecessary. It still made you want to isolate yourself.
"A dose for whatever's going on in your head." Zoro placed three small glasses in front of you and three in front of him when he sat down.
"What do you mean by that?" you turned to him, only then realizing that what was a full table before was now just the two of you.
"Everyone was leaving, some asking you to come along, but you seemed stuck in your own head." he explained and drank the first shot of drink. "Like I said, one glass, one thought."
"And what are you thinking?"
"That you stayed here because you didn't want to go with the wire eyebrow, of course." he pointed out, eliciting a light laugh from you. Little did Zoro know that, out of all the options you could have, Sanji wasn't exactly the one you were looking for. "Now it's your turn."
You downed the drink and felt the strong alcohol burn your throat, but the words didn't want to come out. It was too difficult to bring into the world an insecurity that, in your eyes, would be so dispensable in the vision of someone as strong as Zoro.
"Me again." he pointed out, seeing that you had remained quiet. As soon as he downed another shot, he started. "You let that shit that guy said get into your head, didn't you?"
"Can you tell me where he went wrong?" you asked and only saw Zoro laugh in disbelief. "I'm weak, I'm just a linguist, I can't fight, I don't have a devil fruit. What am I but dead weight?"
"Much more than you imagine." Zoro responded as if it were obvious.
"Much more? Only if it's much more of a burden, much more of a responsibility. I don't want to cause problems for anyone, I don't want to become a responsibility. If it weren't for you today…"
"If it weren't for me, you would still be alive and well, no one would let that idiot hurt you." Zoro seemed to be stressing about the subject and that became clearer when you saw him downing his last dose and the two of yours that were left and then remaining in a brief silence.
"I'm sorry Zoro, I didn't mean to…"
"You're important, okay? To Luffy, to the crew, to me." Seeing you look away from him, without much refinement or kindness, Zoro turned your face back to him, holding you by the chin. "I would face him a thousand times over if I had to."
"Zoro, what does that mean?"
You could feel the adrenaline rush through your body as well as waves of goosebumps going through you from the point Zoro touched you and before he finished the path to your lips, a loud noise on the table separated the two of you.
"It means I don't want you talking about yourself like that again, please." the ending came out more like a whisper than anything else. "And it also means that whenever you need me, I will protect you. It's not everyone's responsibility, you're right, but please let it be mine."
"Here you go!" Luffy sat between the two of you, practically half on top of each of your bodies. In front, a plate full of different types of sweets: chocolates, lollipops, cotton candy. Chopper was along, already stealing some pieces. "Today we know it was a difficult day for you and we know you like sweets, so this is a good thing to cheer you up. What do you think?"
"I think it's amazing!" You took a piece of chocolate, enjoying it as it melted in your mouth. "Thank you, you're amazing." despite leaving in a loud voice, your eyes went to Zoro, who just nodded and adjusted himself on the bar stool, pleased to see you happy again.
Ace
warnings: Ace and F!Reader have a casual, no-strings-attached affair.
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The party and chaos accumulated on one side of the Moby Dick, it was a common image as there was no shortage - and often, barely needed - of reasons for the crew to get drunk and celebrate something. That didn't exempt you. With a good dose of beer in hand, you were sitting further back on the edge of the ship, just contemplating the mess a good few meters ahead, while the sea was choppy behind you, the cool breeze sending goosebumps against your skin.
"Hey, what's a pretty girl doing so isolated like that?" Ace leaned against the free space next to you.
"I just came to catch some wind, breathe a little." you explained, seeing him get even closer and stop almost glued to your side. "And you?"
"I just came to see a pretty girl." He placed his hand on your knee, caressing your skin, which was covered in goosebumps by the cool wind - and perhaps by his touch. "But seriously, is everything okay?"
"Of course, I really just came to enjoy the view for a bit." you explained, seeing him paying attention to every word. "I like to keep these happy moments in my memory, and besides, the night is beautiful."
"Yeah, I like it too." giving up the caress on your leg, he sat down next to you. "I like to think that one day it will be the two of us."
"What do you mean the two of us?"
"This celebration today. It's going to be about the two of us. About me putting you there in the middle, getting down on my knees and asking you to be mine and then, after a while, it's going to be the celebration about our marriage." he saw you laugh knowing he had surprised you with his brief proposal.
"And what else, fire fists?"
"The old man is going to celebrate our wedding, after all, he's the one who has to give the blessing. We're going to drink all night and then, after a while, maybe we'll be celebrating the arrival of our child, I don't know." he shrugged, chuckling at the very thought. "Maybe I went too far."
"For all of this, we need to stop being just hookups, don't you think?"
"You and I know that's not all we are." His tone of voice lowered, as if he was telling an intimate secret - which it wasn't - between you. "You know you mean so much more than just that to me."
"I know and I know you know it too." you turned around to try and steal a quick kiss from him, but were stopped by Ace placing his hat on you.
Gently, he hit the object on your head, removing your strands of hair that were a little messy and then, he helped the small hanging rope. His hand wandered from the object to your cheek, placing a quick caress.
"I love you, Ace." your voice came out as a brief whisper, a confession that was almost forbidden.
"I love you even more." he stole an almost chaste kiss from your lips, just to confirm the feeling.
"You should say that sober." you warned him and saw him walk away with a cynical laugh in him. Upon reaching the glass he had brought, Ace took another sip and offered it to you, who accepted. Water.
"I needed courage to come and talk to you about this today and I don't think drinking alcohol would help." he explained, placing quick kisses along your exposed skin. "So, no more hookups?"
"No more hookups." you confirmed, feeling his lips slide over your skin. "Keep doing that and I'm going to want you to get down on your knees and propose as soon as possible."
"For your information, I intend to kneel today." his kisses found the weak spot on your neck. "But you're the one who's going to be asking for something more."
"Stop that!" perhaps the distraction of his kisses prevented you from seeing Thatch and Marco approaching. "The two of them won't be isolated in this clump."
"Did he have the decency to ask you to be his girlfriend?" Marco asked you, who nodded, feeling his cheeks burn in shyness. "Finally!"
"Then there are no more excuses…" Thatch threw Ace over his shoulder and Marco did the same to you.
"Put me down." the fire fist asked, even if he wanted to, he would have let go of there.
"We need to celebrate. You finally got the courage." Marco pointed out while you didn't even make an effort to get off his shoulder.
It should have been a night for the two of you to celebrate the new agreement between you, but it was difficult to celebrate alone when everyone wanted to celebrate the fact that you were finally and officially together.
Luffy
warnings: Luffy is a cute fool, that's all. Ah, we have mentions of Luffy sinking into the water (poor dear and his inability to swim)
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Damn, a thousand times damn. Why was it almost impossible to get Luffy to listen to anything other than his crazy ideas?
Most of the time it had ended well, but it didn't seem to be the same as today. Praying to any god that could help you at that moment, you threw yourself against the cold, turbulent water of the sea. Shaking your arms the way you thought swimming was, you began to dive awkwardly. A few feet below, you could see Luffy sinking.
With some difficulty, you reached him and despite being weak, he still remained conscious for enough seconds to see that it was you there. Sticking to his vest and using the very little you knew, you managed to pull him back to the Sunny and now the fight that was taking place throughout the ship was being contained mainly by Zoro and Sanji, leaving you not much to worry about other than revive Luffy.
Not finding many plausible solutions, you stuck your mouth to his and tried to pull out all the water he had swallowed. When you repeated the gesture for the third time, you saw him wake up spitting, while you were kneeling next to him, relief washing over you.
"Thank you for saving me." he began, knowing you would probably be furious. "And apparently you learned to swim."
"Desperate times call for desperate measures." you allowed yourself to relax for a brief moment. In the end, he was fine.
"The only problem is, I've always thought about doing it, but not right after I drowned." upon seeing the question mark that was practically drawn on your forehead, Luffy continued. "I always thought about kissing you. You're pretty, nice…"
"Have you always thought about kissing me?" You looked indignant, but quickly corrected yourself, letting the little secret you carried for so long slip out there. "I've always thought that too Luffy, I think I like you, more than just as friends."
"Can we repeat the kiss…" before he finished proposing, his calm tone was replaced by a loud grumble as soon as he was hit by Nami.
"You idiot! How can you let yourself fall into the sea when there was only one person who doesn't know how to swim to save you." she insisted, the angry tone clear in her voice.
Some of your coughs caught the attention of both of them, as well as that of the ship's doctor.
"You might have swallowed a lot of water too!" Chopper pointed out, stethoscope in hand. "I need to run some tests."
"Don't worry about it, Chopper." You tried to push him away, but soon you felt him cover you with a cloth.
"Listen to Chopper." Luffy asked this time, already recovered and almost dry, which was a mystery to you how he managed to do it. "Chopper, take care of her and as soon as everything is okay, call me, please."
Luffy had no social constraints that would prevent him from doing that in front of everyone, but something told him that it had to be special. Then he just placed a chaste kiss on your cheek and left. Now everyone seemed as lost as you had been the first time.
Law
warnings: sweet boyfriend Law. This has to be a warning because this man is amazing.
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Before you even open your eyes, you can feel a pair of arms wrapping around you firmly, moist lips sliding along the contour of your neck. The warm quilting of the blanket against your skin also made you want to stay there even more. However, it had just been a break after lunch for the two of you to talk - and in fact, talk and without meaning to, or perhaps because of the way his fingers slid under the top of your head in a caress, you found yourself being dragged to the world of dreams.
"Looks like someone woke up from their nap." Law's huskier voice indicated that you weren't the only one to have closed your eyes that afternoon.
"Looks like I wasn't the only one who took a nap." you - even though you practically had to fight against his arms - turned around, just a few centimeters separating your face from his. "You look rested."
"And you look beautiful, even in your sleep." he stole a quick kiss from your lips. "Even snoring."
"Snoring?"
"Yes, the noise was certainly capable of driving away the sea kings that were circling around." he grunted when he felt the light, painless slap on his arm. "Okay, it was just a cute snore."
"A cute snore?" you pushed him in vain, feeling like you only gave him enough space to pull you onto his body. "Don't even think about it, Trafalgar, after that, you don't deserve it."
"Don't be so mean." his hands slid over your body in a gentle way, practically not malicious. "Don't I deserve anything?"
"Nothing." you leaned down, placing a kiss on his cheek.
"That kind of nothing seems interesting to me." he pointed to the other cheek. "Can I have a nothing here too?" As soon as your lips met his skin, the tattooed finger moved to another corner of his face. "And here, can I?"
"Since when did you become so sappy?" you continued following where he pointed, leaving soft trails of kisses against his skin. The last place he pointed was at his lips. "Do you think you haven't gotten enough kisses?"
"Not yet." He raised himself up on his elbows, just to reach your lips and take them for himself.
His hands soon tangled against your messy strands of hair, while almost slowly he allowed himself to explore every corner of the paradise that was hidden between your lips. There was no searching for contact, no mischievous squeezes or grumbling and moaning, just the two of you, tangled in a pile of sheets, exchanging kisses and caresses.
"Captain!" Bepo's voice reached the two of you before he had practically walked through the door. "I found you!"
"Would you mind knocking on the door before coming in!" Law's voice started low and ended almost furiously.
His hands, previously on your body, pulled the sheet to cover your body. Even though you were fully dressed and Bepo posed no threat, Law couldn't help the sense of protection that surrounded him when it came to you.
"What's up Bepo?" You said more sweetly, discreetly trying to get off your boyfriend.
"The captain is about an hour late for his task and Ikkaku has been looking for you for a while too." the bear explained. "And also, if we continue on the same route, we will come face to face with a giant sea king in a few minutes."
"And you just let me know now?" Law grunted, but the stress was short-lived when he heard your laugh, almost like an automatic tranquilizer for him. "I'll meet you in a minute."
Understanding the message, Bepo closed the door and left the room. Your boyfriend's face gave it all away: he wished he could stay there, but he couldn't. Duty called you both.
"I'm coming to sleep here with you today, what do you think?" you proposed and saw him stop fixing his shoes to look at you, a small smile lit against his lips.
"Please." He asked, making you nod. "Well, I warned you."
"What did you warn me?"
"Your snoring, now I have a king of the seas to take down." he laughed when he saw you mumble. The small pout on your lips was covered with a kiss from him. "I'll see you later love."
Crocodile
warnings: jealous crocodile, as always. Brief appearance of our favorite hawk eyes.
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Some things started to make sense when you entered the large hall. As an assistant, you knew that part of the ball was just an excuse to attract some enemies while the other part was to find allies, investors or anyone who could make a relevant contribution to the Cross Guild.
Even though you knew all the planning for the party, you still didn't understand why a long, sparkling dark green dress appeared on your table a few days ago. When you saw one of the evening's hosts, you noticed that - perhaps coincidentally - the two of you's outfits matched.
Waving to some infamous pirates - with rewards that you lost count of digits - little by little you got closer to whoever had provided such an outfit for you.
"I see you liked my gift." Crocodile said as you stopped in front of him. Without hesitating, he took one of your hands and made you do a little turn. "It served as if it was made for you."
"I suspect it was actually made for me, am I right?" you accepted the champagne and with an almost malicious smile you took a brief sip. The two of you lived in a cat and mouse hunt between all the years you had been working together, your feelings for him were clear and at least on one day, you expected to be reciprocated.
"I couldn't afford to let the most beautiful lady of the night go unnoticed, or unaccompanied." He said and for a brief minute, you realized he still hadn't let go of your hand. The awareness of the act seemed to reach him too and in a subtle way, he let his hand fall to his side. "And after so long…"
"After Alabasta, after Impel Down, here we are." you concluded his idea, a sideways smile took over Crocodile. "Everyone begging to be at your feet again."
"I know I'm a little cold, I won't deny that fact, but…" he approached, letting the words come out gently and quietly, as if nothing mattered other than the two of you there. "I'm grateful that all these years you've been by my side."
"And I'm grateful that all these years you allowed me to stay. For taking me out of that miserable life." you just said, reaching out to grab another glass and handing it to him. "Here's to business."
"I'm hoping this is the last toast to business." He tapped the glass against yours, seeing your expression remain in doubt. "I hope our next toast like this, you won't be my assistant anymore. I mean, just my assistant."
"And what do you expect, Sir Crocodile?" you gave him space to approach, stopping just a few inches away.
"Instead of green, maybe you'll wear white. And we sure as hell won't have that bunch of stupid pirates." he pointed out, seeing you smile widely. He raised the cup towards you again. "So, here's to our last night of business?"
"Sorry to interrupt." Mihawk's voice reached you as did his brief touch on your waist.
"I hope it's something important." Crocodile's mild expression faded as he analyzed his business partner and wondered why he was touching you.
"I need your help, miss." he pointed out, turning to you. "An idiot who refuses to take his eyes off you coincidentally owes me a few things. Would you be willing to serve as a little bait?" The groan that came from Crocodile upon hearing Mihawk's proposal to you didn't go unnoticed. "It's just a talk with him."
"Alright, I can help you with that." you agreed, much to your partner's chagrin. You handed your cup to Crocodile and taking advantage of the fact that Mihawk practically covered you from the others' view, you gave Crocodile a quick peck. "Last night of business, okay?" the man just nodded and watched you leave with the other man.
"Mihawk?" he called, seeing Mihawk and you turn towards him. "Let him lay a finger on my girl and I'll have his head and yours on my desk."
King
warnings: cute, very cute. Kind of like OC King, but I can't help but write him being cute. Sorry.
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Some companions respected him too much - you analyzed it as pure fear, but you preferred to keep the observation to yourself - however, King did not impose this "fear" on you, quite the opposite.
When you weren't carrying out any of the requested orders, you liked to take your time and observe him. How he seemed to have been sculpted by something that went beyond comparison, how he could be affable when no one was around - this Queen insisted amid acid comments that it was an affection directed only at you.
After a long battle and few scratches distributed throughout the crew, in a more private corner you can see him sitting, patching up a possible injury to his hand. Aside from the bandage and messy hair, he still looked the perfect vision.
"How can I help you?" the words spill out of you without giving you much time to think.
"Don't worry about that."
"That's kind of impossible." you moved even closer, assessing his hand. "It's a small cut, it should heal in a few days."
"It was a small oversight." He shrugged and smoothed the insistent strand of hair that fell into his face.
"Can I help you with this?" you asked and he just nodded, giving you space to work.
Agilely, your fingers reached the stubborn strand and began to adjust it back to where it belonged, that is, the braid that was almost part of it. As soon as you finished, you adjusted it so that it wouldn't fall into his face again.
What went unnoticed by you was how close the two of you were, about how when you looked down you could feel his eyes burning towards you, as they strayed from yours towards your lips.
"Thank you… I mean, how can I thank you for that?" his voice was no more than a brief whisper.
"It is not necessary…"
"I insist." he interrupted you, being graced with the smile he knew on your lips. What he wouldn’t give to let you know what that meant to him.
"A ride then." your answer sounded natural to him, as if the idea crossed your mind with a certain frequency. "I always wanted to see the world from above."
"A ride, sounds amazing to me."
"I knew." Queen's voice interrupted the two of you and you immediately moved away from his body. "I told you that this softie was only soft on you."
"Shut up." King simply said without even looking in the other's direction, his eyes following you to apologize and leave.
How did that idiot Queen feel free to interrupt - and even embarrass - someone so beautiful?
The sun was already setting when you finally finished your tasks for the day and out of everything you could have expected to find in front of you, on your bed, you didn't expect to find a small note.
This way, we cannot be interrupted. Neither on this note nor among the clouds.
I heard that especially tonight the moon and the view from above will be beautiful, not as beautiful as the girl reading this note. Would you like a ride?
Smoker
warnings: mentions of a previous incident, but we have no descriptions, just brief mention of it being traumatic. F!Reader is also in the Navy.
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Even without opening your colleague's door, it was almost as if you could see smoke coming through the gaps. Smoker was stressed and that was nothing new, especially when one of his missions went wrong.
"Commander Smoker?" your knocking on the door didn't seem to have caught his attention that much, so you opened a small gap, seeing him typically sitting with two cigars in his hands. "I can enter?"
"Yes." he simply responded, watching you close the door behind you and cross the small space that separated you from his desk.
"Here are some reports from today's mission."
You placed them on the table and you could see him still sulking. You had been working together for too long to know that if possible, Smoker would always let his frustration take over the entire environment - and sometimes it wasn't even in the form of smoke.
"I heard that some stupid pirates gave you a hard time today." you pointed out and saw him just respond with a look, he really wasn't interested in conversation.
A small idea, more like a memory than an idea, crossed your mind and you decided to put it into practice.
"You seem tense." you stated and saw him sigh deeply as you left your gloves on the armchair in front of him.
Without even asking permission - if he didn't want to, you would have at least gotten closer to him, you let your hands slide lightly from his shoulders to the back of his head. It only took a few squeezes for you to start to see him relax. Massaging all over his shoulder and neck, Smoker slowly began to become something more malleable and accessible under your hands.
"Those idiots, if I catch those little shits." he grunted, turning his neck a little to give you more room to work. "And you still ask if I'm tense."
"Some things are impossible to go unnoticed." you let the laughter escape you, a comfort to Smoker's ears. "But you know, sometimes you need to take some time off and relax."
"You say it like you take a lot of time to relax." he turned around, seeing you stick your tongue out. "Some things are impossible to go unnoticed." he repeated to you. "How many nights did you sleep well after that incident?"
"Well, I guess…" you thought for a moment, now your hands were just resting on his shoulders. "To be honest? I think it was only that night that I slept there." you pointed to the armchair on the opposite side. "And of course, in the infirmary. Their medicine is good."
"Don't say things like that." he pointed out, little did you know but the idea of ​​that night still gave him chills.
Letting the affection he had for you guide him, Smoker brought his hand to yours on his shoulder and pulled it, so that your face was level with his.
"I believe we both need to relax." he pointed out, his breathing practically mixing with yours.
"Yeah, we both need it."
You could almost taste Smoker's lips when the door ahead abruptly opened, revealing a panting Tashigi in front of you.
"Commander Smoker!" she started and then stopped, analyzing the situation in front of her eyes. "Do I interrupt something?"
"Don't worry honey, I'm leaving." you pointed out and you could hear Smoker practically grunting in front of you.
"What's so important Tashigi." he didn't bother to let go of your hand, even with the girl's presence, even with your body already standing behind him.
"The pirates from the last mission, someone attacked their ship and they sank, so the team that stayed behind managed to bring them in." Smoker jumped to his feet immediately, picking up the reports you had left on the table.
"You can go, I'll be waiting here." you warned without even waiting for him to ask. As soon as the room was empty, you occupied your favorite armchair and, as you rarely did, you allowed yourself to relax with the aroma of Smoker that still remained in the room.
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a-hazbin-reader · 7 months
Note
I would like to see how Alastor's mother meets the reader (when they were alive). I see almost nothing of Alastor's mother and I feel that she is a wonderful mother ヾ(≧▽≦*)o
Alastor lovers would be NOTHING without this woman, she should be WORSHIPPED
Alastor X Reader Headcanons
✅️Romantic
❌️Platonic
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TW: None I think???
Description: ☝️⬆️
Alastor's mother was his entire world, all the love and affection in his life came from her
The way he learned to love he learned from her
So you have her to thank for that
Which is why you're so fucking nervous to meet her, if she doesn't like you then you feel like your relationship is doomed
Not that Alastor would leave you at the drop of a hat but you just couldn't make him choose, you love him too much for that
You're fretting over everything, your hair, your clothes, your perfume-
E V E R Y T H I N G
It's not until you feel a strong hand on your shoulder and look into Alastor's eyes that you realize you were panicking
He's smiling at you, he's always smiling, but you can tell you worried him
"Sorry...it's just...I'm nervous..."
You're being pulled into his warm embrace before you can say anything more, familiar fingers pushing your chin up
You feel a pleasant shudder go through you as you meet Alastor's eyes, soaking up the affection that radiates from them
"Now now, a little dinner has you this worked up~?"
"What if she doesn't like me?"
He's leaning in closer, never breaking your gaze as his lips brush against your own, his canines glinting almost like fangs-
"Why wouldn't she like you? If I love you then she'll surely love you too..."
God, this woman raised such a good man
If Alastor was being honest with you, he's a bit nervous too but not in a bad way
He's excited for his two favorite people to meet, he's excited to show off each of you to the other so that you both understand his love for you two
He's just so ecstatic that this is finally happening
Coos and soothes you the entire walk to his mother's house, knowing that you're nervous but understanding that you have no reason to be
Alastor lets himself in and you're immediately welcomed with the scent of delicious food cooking
You can hear his mother in the kitchen, the table not yet fully set
Alastor leaves your side to hug his mother in greeting, laughing a little when he startles the old woman
She's beautiful even though she's no longer a young woman, you see a lot of her in her son
"Mother, I'd like you to meet my darling Y/N~"
Alastor's arm wraps around you in an attempt to calm your nerves and to present you proudly to his mother
When her kind eyes land on you, all sense of anxiety and fear melts away as she pulls you in for a hug
She's stronger than she looks, squeezing you as though you two have known each other for years
You realize that she hugs just like Alastor and melt into her arms as you hug her back
"It's so good to finally meet you..! I've been asking Alastor to bring you over ever since he first mentioned he was seeing someone!"
Now Alastor is blushing and mumbling something about her promising she wouldn't bring that up
You can't help but laugh and pat his cheek softly, it's adorable when he's embarrassed
Together the three of you finish up dinner, his mother sending him out of the kitchen to set the table
Leaving the two of you alone
It starts off smoothly, the two of you making polite conversation before falling into comfortable silence
And then it's uncomfortable
Oh shit you're nervous again
She stands next to you as the two of you work together to finish cooking, a soft smile on her face
"My son really loves you, my dear..."
Her voice is still soft, still warm, but there's a warning tone to it
Alastor did say his mother could be the sweetest woman or the scariest woman you've ever met
"I hope that love isn't misplaced."
Oh. Of course.
She's looking out for her son, like any good mother would do
You're careful with your next words, reaching out and taking the other woman's hand gently
You make sure to look into her eyes, wanting to convey your truth
"Ma'am, you son will have my heart and my soul in life and in death. I love him more than words can convey.."
And that's all it takes, the woman pulling you in for another hug and clutching you in relief
This woman is relieved that her son found someone who genuinely loves him and will continue to love him when she's gone
And if you love her son as she does then she has no choice but to love you as well
Things are easy going between you two after that, Alastor's mother loving you a little more with each thing she learns about you
She watches the two of you interact and gains a better understanding of the relationship
She understands why her son fell for you, you're more than just a pretty face that lured him in
You actually remind her a little bit of herself in her younger days
Mother, please don't say that
The two of you actually get along rather well, ganging up on Alastor several times throughout the night
"I'm only saying! The best way to enjoy tea is-"
"Alastor, honey, Y/N and I just told you that you're wrong."
"Why don't you let the two people who know what they're talking about carry the conversation, hm~?"
"I think it's about time we leave, don't you two agree?"
NO
Not Alastor's mother taking your hand and looking at her son with a shocked expression
"You would take away my darling Y/N? What cruel boy you've turned into!"
Oh she's good
Alastor pretends to be annoyed at the sight of you two clinging to each other and whining about not wanting to be separated
Before that fake annoyance melts away into fondness and he's joining in on the hug
Alastor takes care of cleaning up dinner, leaving the two of you alone again
Which means Alastor's mother gets to show you photos of Alastor when he was younger
And tell you all the embarrassing stories
You two are so busy giggling and cooing at the photos that you don't notice Alastor standing in the doorway, face flushed red with embarrassment
"Time to go, my dear!"
She sends you home with plenty of leftovers and fusses over you like you're one of her own
"Do you need a jacket, dear? A hat? I might have an extra one around here-"
Gives you the biggest hug and kiss on the forehead before you leave, telling you to visit her often
Oh just one more hug before you go
Before Alastor can pull away from his own hug, she pulls him back to whisper to him
"You picked a good one, my darling boy...~"
You three are a family after that, no matter what anyone says, no matter what happens
She loves you just as much as she loves her boy and she'll brag about you just as much as he does
Carries a photo of you two around in her purse so she can show everybody
Literally loves having you around and is worried that other men will try to take you for themselves
You don't have a ring on that finger
Not yet anyways
Alastor's mother just has to convince him that he wants to get married
Which probably won't be hard
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This is like the only photo of Alastor's mother I can find and I don't even know if it's canon or not-
She's gorgeous??
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This one wasn't originally what I was working on but it was too good to pass up
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yyokkki · 2 months
Note
Hiiii~ any headcannons on how we meet/court/rizz/woo malleus or kalim? Or even trey?
Hii!! You're my first writing request!! I'm sorry it took this long though, this trio in particular are hard to write for me,, 100000 character analyseseses later and I'm finally done TT Trey's is kinda mid cuz I'm actually so blank rn but I hope you don't mind!
---
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Your mere existence is enough-
Jk jk, to be totally honest with you, even though I love the Malleus Otome Game allegations I don’t think he’s even considered you like that-
For one, you are first friend and rather than romance he’s more focused on the platonic bond you have.
It’ll take some time for him to see you as a romantic interest, most likely after he manages to befriend others at NRC.
Once that hurdle is passed, we can get to the wooing phase >]
He’s someone who has a very limited knowledge on human customs beyond what he’s learned in Biology class so you’d have to make a trip to the library to read up on fae courting rituals.
Offerings. Lots and lots of offerings. Ice cream, precious jewels, pretty rocks, basically anything you think is nice.
He’ll be quick to catch on.
I do think it’ll take some time for him to accept your feelings. He doesn’t know what it’s like to be in love and he can’t tell if his heartbeat speeding up whenever you’re around is because you’re his best friend or the love of his life.
That’s where peepaw Lilia comes in!
The self-proclaimed master of love himself!
He probably got impatient and decided to just speed things up by having the love talk with Malleus 50 years ahead of the schedule.
(Lilia is really cheering you two on. He’s grown on you as an individual and sees the genuine care you two have for each other.)
Malleus dates to marry, (It was straight up marriage before so thank Lilia) so he brings up the topic of royalty and its duties and dangers. 
He understands if you back out but if you stay? Prepare yourself, for when a Draconia falls, they never climb back out.
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Now, making Kalim Al-Asim fall for you is no easy feat. It’s easy to have him like you, sure! But love?
He’s accepted that his future marriage will be arranged by his parents, and he plans to make the best out of it!
But if one day he discovered his smile got a tad brighter around you than anyone else?
Kalim is full of hope but he isn’t innocent or dumb. He knows how he feels and he knows what would happen if he were to act on said feelings. 
Your life would be in constant danger to the point that one day you might come to hate him and he dreaded that possibility.
So instead of running into your arms, he keeps his distance. It’s not obvious enough for you to notice but he keeps himself steadily behind a line.
To earn his love is to earn his trust.
Trust that you’d never make yourself unhappy just for him.
Trust that you won’t be burdened by his emotions.
Trust that you’d always appreciate his existence.
Trust that he doesn’t need to do anything grand to keep your love.
Trust that no matter what, you’d never be able to hate him.
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Trey hates conflict. So much of his life is based around avoiding it.
But after Riddle’s incident he’s come to realise that letting something stew for too long will make the pot boil over.
Thus, someone who balances him out, knowing when to act to stop a problem in its tracks would be a godsend.
Someone who despite his ‘normalcy’ loves him for him. Not the completely average student, the kind and caring vice dormleader of Heartslabyul or the dental obsessed freak. Just Trey Clover. For all that he is.
Besides that, he’s always had a longing for domestic bliss. Icing wiped onto noses, matching aprons and the like.
If you were willing to live that out with him it would be all he needed.
While he does enjoy the occasional flirt, wooing him is as simple as that. Calling him out, loving every part of him and savouring the treats he’d made with you in mind.
Next thing you know, you’re receiving ulterior motive cupcakes every week!
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nighttimeclassics · 4 months
Text
so im just thinking about the Orpheus and Eurydice metaphor in Dead Boy Detectives again...
so i really cant get over the symbolism in the show's comparison between Edwin and Charles and Orpheus and Eurydice. I'm sure someone else more succinct than me has already talked about it but man i just have to because as a classicist it has been consuming my brain since it happened... this is going to be a shitty ramble, but we vibe
so in the show, it is Edwin who first realises his feelings for Charles, and is the first to to truthful about them. Given that, in most translations of the tale of Orpheus and Eurydice, Orpheus' devotion to his wife is seen as the "stronger love" between the pair. highlighted in later adaptations such as Hadestown, as Eurydice makes the active choice to go to the underworld and leave her husband rather than their wedding being overshadowed by issues "worse than any omens". therefore, Edwin could initially be seen as the Orpheus parallel. particularly when you consider that Edwin 'guided Charles from the darkness' when he was dying of hypothermia with the lantern
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however, unsurprisingly, given that is it Edwin who escaped from Hell, and is returned to it, Charles appears as the Orpheus parallel, with Edwin being his Eurydice. this is obviously then made super explicit in the show with it being Charles rescuing/ leading Edwin out of Hell. but even then it is not that simple
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In Ovid's Metamorphoses, when pleading with Hades and Persephone, Orpheus states "my wife is the cause of my journey. A viper [...] robbed her of her best years. I longed to be able to accept it, and I do not say I have not tried: Love won." and obviously at the core of both of these relationships, is a deep deep love between them, regardless of how that manifests. Something i think is a massive parallel that i haven't seen anyone talk about yet is the willingness to remain in the Underworld/Hell for their respective partners.
going back to Metamorphoses, when Orpheus is requesting Eurydice's return to the mortal world, he gives Hades and Persephone an alternative solution of sorts. he says "if the fates refuse my wife this kindness [of returning to life], I am determined not to return {to the mortal realm]: you can delight in both our deaths." now is this not effectively the same thing Charles says to the Night Nurse when bargaining with her to open a door to Hell??? Charles says "then open up a door and I'll go get him, then we're stuck in Hell and you know where we are, or, I bring him back and we're all yours. It's a win-win." tell me that these aren't the same. you cant.
But i do think the most interesting parallel is when Charles and Edwin are running up the spiral staircase. i am not mentioning the times when escaping Hell, Edwin overtook Charles running, because let's be honest, we all know he is the faster sprinter of the two given the 70 years he spent practising. so I am disregarding that. but what I do find fascinating is this - and why I said it was more complicated earlier; in the metamorphoses Orpheus is obviously given the stipulation that he must not look at Eurydice when guiding her out of the underworld, or the agreement "would be null and void". and its here that we see another reversal. during the majority of the run up the staircase, Charles is behind Edwin, because like we have established, he's speedy. but in this key moment, Charles takes the lead in their escape, walking in front of Edwin whilst making it clear that they need to keep moving. just like in the tale, Charles, fulfilling Orpheus' role, "Afraid [they] was no longer there, and eager to see [them], the lover turned his eyes", turns to look back at Edwin, delivering the ridiculously romantic, 'sorry, no version of this where I didn't come get you is there?'. however, after this he refocuses on continuing up the staircase, which is where Edwin steps in:
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as you can see in the gif, currently, Edwin is in, what I'm going to call the 'Eurydice position', following the lover out of the afterlife. and it is Edwin, as Eurydice, who basically chooses to condemn himself to the underworld/ hell, allowing the demon to catch up with them just to 'see [his] lover' and ensure Charles knows that '[he] had been loved'. t
im just going to put the section where Orpheus looks back at Eurydice in here because I think its all relevant:
"Afraid she was no longer there, and eager to see her, the lover turned his eyes. In an instant she dropped back, and he, unhappy man, stretching out his arms to hold her and be held, clutched at nothing but the receding air. Dying a second time, now, there was no complaint to her husband (what, then, could she complain of, except that she had been loved?). She spoke a last ‘farewell’ that, now, scarcely reached his ears, and turned again towards that same place"
by forcing Charles to turn around and face him, Edwin is fulfilling the roles of both Eurydice and Orpheus. in this instance, he is the one 'stretching out his arms' to hold Charles, but he is also the one that could be sent/ dragged back to the afterlife for this, but he just had to make sure Charles was aware of his feelings for him, to know that he was 'loved'. and I think Edwin was potentially prepared to return to the Doll House, or at least believed he would be able to find it more bearable knowing that he had been able to bear his soul to Charles, eve if that meant Charles couldn't come back again and try to rescue him for a second time, which Orpheus tried to do in the Metamorphoses, "Orpheus wished and prayed, in vain, to cross the Styx again, but the ferryman fended him off" and I feel like we all know Charles would have also kept trying if he lost Edwin again.
i guess, what im trying to say, in the most long-winded way, is that Charles and Edwin don't fill binary roles of one of them being Orpheus and the other being Eurydice, they are both of those things to one another throughout the show and I think that's really beautiful and I have to give massive credit to whoever did episode seven because I really feel like they did their homework. even after all the ramble I have written I still feel like I haven't fully made the point I was trying to make, but I definitely got some of the way there I think
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(I didn’t find any info if your askbox is closed or not, if you are not taking up requests you can ignore this!)
But hi :) how are you? how you are doing well
this is a bit personal, but would you mind doing either a Headcanon or scenario with reader x turtles (romantic/crush stage) with a…Hopeless reader? Kinda someone who had to tell themselves that love isn’t on their life journey and that seriously bother them? Lol
this weekend I’m gonna attend a friends wedding, while meeting with some shared friends before the wedding, one of them quoted corpse bride’s scene “to Emily, always the bridesmaid, never the bride” for me (most of my friends are married or dating long term), usually I handle the lack of a love life fairly well (by not thinking about it or just making jokes about it lol) but tonight it kinda really bothered me, a lot.) a lot of my friends treat me being single as something I don’t out efforts in it? But holy shit I do, and it really hurts to see them saying or acting like I’m not doing enough? Anyways. I guess the request would be how the turtles would react to a reader who kinda just lost hope, who agrees with the quote even if it makes her very sad? Kinda trying to wing the night lowkey but turtles can sense it hurt her (maybe Vern said the quote lol, or something similar… that’s something stupid enough for the falcon to do 😅)
I hope makes sense, if not I apologize for the messy ask. Have a good day / night
I'm sorry that happened. Your friends definitely need to stfu about that lol dating and relationships are fun, but nobody NEEDS them. If they need a RELATIONSHIP to feel fulfilled, they have shit to figure out.
Definitely been there tho. And being single can be horrible. I see you
Scene: Your turtle has been secretly pining for you for a while now. Hasn't got the guts to say anything yet.
TMNT x Lonely Reader
Leo
- He could sense your reaction instantly, despite how well you hid it.
- Your micro expressions, the slight but sudden shift of your bodyweight away from Vern- Leo almost didn't catch that you had smiled and laughed at the comment.
- His own reaction was visceral and overwhelming, at least it was to him.
-He remained still by your side, but the urge to...he didn't even know. Hide you. Push hard at Verns shoulder- something.
-Geez. He hadn't felt like this since he was a child. Like he could protect his little brothers or you from judgment or cruelty.
-He couldn't.
-He sucked in a breath through his nose, scrambling for self-control; watching you handle the interaction like an adult. Forcing himself to as well.
-But it did satisfy him to see that Vern physically felt his animosity. The guy took once glance at Leo before he instantly stuttered an excuse to walk to another conversation.
-"Vern is an idiot." Leo scratched out, desperate to keep what he really wanted to say to you at a minimum. "There's absolutely nothing wrong with you."
-You seemed surprised at that, glancing up at him. But your quite, sincere smile made it it worth it.
Raph
- "Always the brides maid, never the bride, huh?"
- "What?" It was a reactive response. Before you could even register what he had said, or the sudden amount of hurt- or embarrassment you felt.
- Raph had turned wide, expectant eyes on Vern as well, something Vern noticed instantly.
- "Well, yunno." Vern stutteres, trying to stay focused on you. "I've seen ya at these events a lot but you never bring a guy around...or-"
-"See that girl over there?" Raph suddenly said, leaning down a little to point your gaze in the right direction.
- "Yeah." You said quietly.
-"Who's that girl, Vern?"
-Vern looked back at you guys, shrugging and putting his hands back in his pockets with an air of pride. "She's my girlfriend."
-Raph smirked, his voice somehow both condescending and unusually soft. "Vern met her a week ago. That makes her..." Raph trailed off, looming back into his full height, towering over Vern. "The sixth one this year, right. Makin' you real good at givin' advice to pretty girls, Falcon boy. Careful with that."
-"Jesus. I'm just- I'll be over there." Vern sighed, awkwardly stepping aside then walking out of sight.
- Raph said nothing, instead turning to you. "You alright?"
-You were desperate not to say everything you wanted to. "Much better." You said instead, looking up at him. Hoping the softness you saw there was a reflection of what you felt for him too.
Donnie
- Donnie couldn't even react or register the words before you were handling it. Shrugging and waving Vern off.
-He was horrified. His eyes were glued to Vern, completely confused that the guy had missed how rude of a statement that was.
-The conversation came and went, and while he had a wonderful time, he was entirety focused on you.
-While you didn't seem MISERABLE, you were different. Something had obviously changed. And it was Verns fault.
-You had no reason to feel pressure of that kind. You were perfect the way you were! No one should ever, ever, ever make you feel anything less.
-The thought that you did made him physically sick to his stomach.
-He might not have caught it in time to say anything in the moment.
-But Verns apartment locks, car, computer, and bathroom pipes all giving him a hard time all in the next 24 hours?
-A complete and utter mystery...
Mikey
-"Yeah you should listen to him." Mikey said.
-Shock coursed through you. "What?" You looked at him, wide eyed, heart in your throat- "W- I should-"
-"You should listen to him." Mikey repeated, noding solumley, starting to confidently strole around Vern. "This guy has fantastic dating advise. You don't even know, girl. Look at him!" Mikey's smile was as bright as the sun, gesturing to Vern as if he was a plater he was showing off to you.
-"He's been on this earth so long, his life experience exceeds our very comprehension, girl."
-Vern made a sudden puzzled expression while yours melted quickly into a smile.
-"He's got recipes too. Qualifications, evidence, the whole nine yards. Guy has like- twelve grand kids-"
-"I- C'mon, Mike-" Vern was catching on.
-"Ohhh.. yeah, that's right. No grandkids. But he does have a wife. They just had their fiftieth anniversary-!"
-"I'm not that o- He's joking with you." Vern tried to explain. "I'm not married."
-Mikey snapped his fingers as he had remembered something, suddenly getting much, MUCH closer in Verns personal space.
-"Oh yeah, that's right. You're not married. I forget that your on, like, your sixth girlfriend this month. Maybe actual advise sounds like..."
-Mikey stepped away from Vern, standing infront of you. "Keep those standards up, girl. Pretty face like yours? You could have anyone you want."
-You couldn't stop smiling.
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blingblong55 · 1 year
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Did you care? - König
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F!Reader, angst, no happy ending, cheating
For months since you met him he had made it known his job was his priority and like any fool you accepted that. If he couldn't make it to a date, he'd let you know something had come up on the job. Not once did he ever tell you what he did for a living, which raised alarms from your friends and family. All worried he would end up hurting you, leaving you in ruins. But you liked him too much to even dare question him or his actions. 
There were times when he'd never call, for months on end but you'd always update him on your life like he had made you promise months into the relationship and still he gave you nothing in return. You always thought he was just not the type to be romantic but that maybe deep down he was someone with emotions and vulnerable to the right person. You of course wanted to be that right person. Around you, he was able to talk more but it was never about who he was outside of the four walls where you two would share life stories no, it was just meant for you to hear. 
The day you found out he was cheating was glass shattered, your fragile heart in pieces. You had gently held that heart for him to take, the one you kept hidden from the rest of the world. The restaurant where he told you the news of his infidelity still was frequently visited by you from time to time. Wanted to stay there, wait for him just in case he came back for you. "R/N," that day was the time of death for the nicknames he once adorned you with. "I'm deeply sorry, I found someone new and she...well she is someone I see myself spending more time with." Maybe the way he broke the news to you was awful but it was better if you heard it from him than from the cheap whispers of so-called friends and family. 
You sat and stared out the window, watching as four memorable years went by as if they were just another bullet to the target. Maybe it was stupid to think he would've never cheated but all the signs and alarms were there. After all, they do say those in love are blinded. That was your case, the worst one to have as a hopeless romantic. The books of love you read, the movies and wishes you hopped for, all gone with one sentence. 
A day after the breakup, you were at that restaurant, people whispering about you, what a sad sight to witness. You sat in the same spot, light lingering on your face, dim and depressive. Autumn was awkward, scarf season, cardigans and watching the leaves fall to the mossy pavement of the park you two used to read at during spring. Winter was the worst, wanted to cuddle up to him after a snowy day. Spring came with sorrow, as you found out how happy and outgoing he was with his new partner. Summer and the Blues, what a bad time to be alive. Sleeping in, drowning in regret and memories of what once was. It all felt as if that pain he created with 20 words dug a deeper hole for it to stay warm during winter as you died of cold and sorrow, the heart of a winter soul. 
The floors of your parent's cabin creaking under your step, cat purring in your lap. Tears running down your shameful face. The memories of him holding you as you two watched a movie one blissful Christmas coming and making your brain palpitate as if it had more than sadness to work for. Two years after the breakup, he was there, holding the hand of a pregnant woman. Many times ago, he had told you he never wanted a family, that all he needed was you, the cat and the bedsheets that covered your bodies. Guess that was a lie too. You walk past them, yellow tulips in your hands and that is how he saw you. All along, he never meant to leave, the autumn breeze bringing him a beautiful time in his life. 
There you two ran, the taxi about to leave, your blue scarf waving in the wind, drunken words said, and there he was, holding your hand. "Liebling, where are we going!" his laughter warm. "It's a surprise!" you smile. Always so spontaneous, your soul and being making him bend his usual cold heart in two to gift you the best of him. Maybe he didn't do his best to give that but behind doors, where he felt safe, you were the one to make him try his best. And now, there you go, heart in hand once more as he watches you in woe. "Liebling." he whispers, the woman he was with turns to him, "What was that?" he had never called anyone else Liebling. That belonged to you and only you, the woman he wanted all of life with, the dreary days, the hand holding as you two carefully walked over the snow and now here he is, lost again. 
"Nothing, I...I twisted my English and German," he laughed. Maybe if he had been more patient with himself. At the time of the infidelity, all his mates and soldiers were getting married. You had expressed your marriage concerns, how the image of it was ruined by your parent's loveless marriage. But in between words that he never heard, you wanted to try for him. The cries of laughter, the warm embrace on the summer nights, the scarred face that was kissed over and over, happiness because of you, the weird combo you made with a vanilla ice cream cone and crisps, all that is gone. There were days he'd head down to the fast-food chain and order, "Some crisps and ice cream, please." Eating them by the corner you laughed at, stupid jokes said and all making him love your little laughs.  
Life is funny, maybe for not emotional little humans but for the gods that watch us. A mystery will stand for the rest of human time, did he care? Did he care that you adored him with your entire essence, body, mind and being? Or maybe it was your homemade baking, the burnt cake, biscuits and the random bruise you'd when walking around being careless. Maybe it was envy that you lived such a tranquil life and he didn't. Maybe. Did he care?
Part 2 is here
--
Tags: @warrior-of-justice
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glearyyyne · 5 months
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Deja Vu Part 2
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Part 1
Synopsis: Meeting you again was great for satoru as he began to sleep more just to meet you it began to be a problem in his real life, he tried to fix this problem but only ended up losing you.
Word Count: 6,025 Words
Warning: Angst, Sleeping pills, insomnia, mention of death, Imaginary friends (?)
Note: It's been a long time since I last posted I was just super duper busy with school and also because I got sick but thankfully I finished part 2 so enjoy!!!
_____________________________________________________________
 "Today's training was so hard, I’m not even exaggerating. What the heck is that strength in those puppets that Yaga-sensei owns?!" Satoru ventured out on you as you listened to him, with your back against the tree while he was laying on your lap as Tomorrow was sleeping soundly and curled up beside Satoru.
"That's why you shouldn't judge them based on their appearance," you told him, as Satoru whined because he expected you to side him up.
As a month passed since you and Satoru met again and he apologized for forgetting the promise, you reassured him that it's fine, though he continued apologizing whenever he got the chance.
You noticed how he appeared at the usual time as it means he started sleeping more just to meet you. 
His daily routine became a rhythm: waking up, showering, eating, school, training, returning home, eating again, and brushing his teeth before heading to bed, just to meet you at the same place on the hill.
One day, you asked him, "Don't you think that the phrase 'you come at four o'clock in the afternoon, then at three o'clock I shall begin to be happy' sounds romantic?”
"Why?" Satoru asked, his curiosity piqued by your comment.
You smiled softly, feeling warmth in your chest as you gazed into his eyes. 
"Because it shows the anticipation and joy of waiting for someone you care about. Just like how I eagerly await our time together every day, knowing that seeing you brings happiness to my heart.” You answered.
Satoru's smile widened, and he gently intertwined his hand with yours, his touch sending a comforting warmth through you. 
As he leaned in, he placed a soft kiss on the back of your hand, eliciting a delighted giggle from you.
Satoru's heart raced with anticipation as he leaned closer to you, feeling the moment swell with tenderness. 
Just as he was about to close the distance between you for a kiss, the sound of a table slamming jolted him awake. 
Confusion clouded his senses as he looked around, only to see Shoko and Geto trying to suppress their laughter, while Yaga glared at him with disappointment.
Satoru realized he had fallen asleep in class.
Oh…
"Satoru!" Yaga's voice boomed, filled with disappointment. 
"This is the third time this week you've fallen asleep in my class. Do you think becoming a sorcerer entails sleeping through your studies?" He added.
Satoru's cheeks flushed with embarrassment as he stammered out an apology. "I'm sorry, Sensei. It won't happen again."
Yaga sighed heavily, shaking his head. "You have potential, Satoru, but you need to apply yourself more. Don't let your laziness overshadow your talent."
Feeling chastised, Satoru nodded solemnly, determined to make amends for his lack of focus.
As the lecture finally came to an end, Satoru, Geto, and Shoko walked out of the classroom together. Satoru couldn't help but groan in frustration as the teasing from his friends began.
Geto chuckled, nudging Satoru playfully. "Looks like someone was having sweet dreams in class, huh?"
Shoko joined in, giggling teasingly. "I wonder who you were dreaming about, Satoru. Maybe a certain someone or a wet dream?"
Satoru rolled his eyes, trying to play it off coolly. "Ha ha, very funny, you two. Let's just focus on getting through the rest of the day without any more embarrassment, okay?”
But geto and shoko shared a look of concern that satoru didn't notice.
"Satoru, you know we're here for you, right?" Shoko's tone softened, her concern evident in her words.
Satoru stopped walking, his expression puzzled as he stared at his friends. "What?" he replied, unsure of what they were getting at.
Geto stepped forward, his voice gentle yet firm. "We're just worried about you, Satoru. You've been distant lately, and falling asleep in class isn't like you. Is everything okay?”
Satoru laughed nervously, trying to brush off their concern. "Come on, guys, no need to overthink things. I'm just tired from all the training."
But Shoko's serious expression stopped him in his tracks. "We're not joking, Satoru. We're genuinely worried about you."
Satoru's laughter faded as he paused, his mind racing as he tried to figure out what could be wrong.
Satoru stayed silent for a moment before finally speaking up, his voice strained. "I'm... fine," he said, his words lacking conviction. Shoko was about to respond when Satoru suddenly quickened his pace, leaving the two of them alone.
Shoko let out a heavy sigh, watching Satoru's retreating figure with concern etched on her face. Geto gently patted her shoulder, offering a comforting gesture. "He's maybe just handling some heir duty, you know?" he suggested.
"Yeah, but it feels unusual to not see the usual goofy Satoru we know," Shoko replied, her worry evident in her voice.
***
Satoru's chest heaved as he slammed the door to his dorm room, exhaustion weighing heavily on him after his impromptu marathon from school. 
Taking a moment to catch his breath, he went to the bathroom, the fatigue evident in every step.
Turning on the faucet, he splashed cool water onto his face, hoping to wash away some of the weariness that clung to him. 
As he looked up into the mirror, he couldn't help but notice the dark circles under his eyes, a stark reminder of his recent lack of sleep. 
Satoru sighed, realizing that his sunglasses wouldn't be enough to conceal the evidence of his exhaustion. 
Making a mental note to buy some concealer, he reached into a drawer and retrieved the sleeping pills he had been relying on for the past two weeks.
The weight of his actions hung heavy on him as he stared at the pills in his hand, a silent admission of his desperation to meet you again, even at the expense of his own well-being.
Satoru's gaze lingered on the sleeping pills, his mind filled with conflicting emotions. The memory of Shoko and Geto's concern weighed heavily on him, their worried expressions etched into his thoughts. 
He couldn't shake the guilt that gnawed at him, knowing that his actions were causing his friends unnecessary worry.
But then, a different image surfaced in his mind. 
It was you, smiling and waiting for him on the hill, your presence filling him with a warmth and comfort he couldn't find elsewhere. 
The thought of seeing you again, of basking in your company, pushed aside his doubts and fears.
With a heavy heart, Satoru tightened his grip on the pills, his resolve wavering. 
Ultimately, the longing to be with you won out. With a resigned sigh, he opened the bottle and retrieved a single pill, swallowing it down with a gulp of water.
As the pill slid down his throat, Satoru couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt. But at that moment, the promise of meeting you again was enough to silence his doubts, if only temporarily.
Satoru moved quickly, stashing the bottle of pills back into the drawer before making his way to the mini-fridge. 
Retrieving a bottle of water, he took a few gulps to help swallow the pill more easily, the cool liquid soothing his parched throat.
Once he finished drinking, he made his way to his bed, the exhaustion weighing heavily on him. 
As he lay down, he could feel the effects of the pill beginning to take hold, a gentle wave of drowsiness washing over him.
Closing his eyes, Satoru let himself succumb to the embrace of sleep, the promise of meeting you again lingering in his mind as he drifted off into dreams.
***
As Satoru slowly blinked his eyes open, he was met with the sight of you standing at the top of the hill, a warm smile gracing your lips. Tomorrow wagged their tail excitedly, adding to the joyous atmosphere.
Unconsciously, a smile spread across Satoru's face as he made his way toward you. 
Once he reached the top, you enveloped him in a tight hug, filling him with a sense of warmth and comfort.
With a mischievous smirk, Satoru scooped you up in his arms, twirling you around as you held tightly onto his shoulders. 
"Having fun yet?" he teased, reveling in the playful moment as you giggled and protested, urging him to put you down.
Gently, Satoru lowered you back to the ground, his hands tenderly cupping your cheeks as he gazed into your eyes with affection. 
Without a word, he leaned in, pressing his lips to yours in a tender, passionate kiss.
You responded eagerly, the kiss deepening as you lost yourself in the moment. 
But the sound of Tomorrow's whining broke the spell, causing you both to pull away, giggling at the interruption.
"Well, someone's feeling left out," you teased Tomorrow, kneeling to scoop them up into your arms. "Don't worry, Tomorrow, we won't forget about you."
Tomorrow's tail wagged furiously as they licked your face in excitement, their whines quickly turning into joyful barks as they enjoyed the attention. 
While laughing, you carried Tomorrow, feeling grateful for the joy they brought to your moments together.
Satoru smiled warmly at the sight of you and Tomorrow, feeling a sense of contentment wash over him. You two always had a way of making him smile, no matter what challenges he faced.
Before long, the three of you settled onto the grass, leaning against the sturdy trees as you engaged in a heartfelt conversation about life. 
Satoru shared his dreams and aspirations with you, opening up about his hopes for the future. 
You listened intently, offering words of encouragement and support, while Tomorrow nestled comfortably between you, their presence a comforting reminder of the bonds you shared.
As the peaceful moment enveloped you, Satoru's words cut through the atmosphere. 
"This moment feels so good, yet I feel scared about what will come next," he confessed, his tone tinged with uncertainty.
Concern etched across your face, “Why?” You asked him.
"I don't know," Satoru replied, his voice heavy with self-doubt. "I don't think I deserve to be here, all happy while ignoring the sins I've committed as a sorcerer."
His words hung in the air, laden with the weight of his conscience. You reached out, taking his hand in yours, offering silent support and understanding as he grappled with his inner demons.
"I promise, we'll navigate through this together, no matter what obstacles come our way," you reassure him, your voice filled with conviction. 
As you caress his hand with your thumb, you convey a sense of comfort and solidarity, silently promising to stand by his side through thick and thin, come what may, whether it be heaven or hell.
Satoru smiled softly at your words, but all good things must come to an end.
Satoru's smile faltered as Tomorrow abruptly woke up from their nap, their ears twitching in alarm as they searched for the source of the disturbance. 
Before anyone could react, Tomorrow bolted away, leaving you and Satoru speechless in their wake.
"Tomorrow!" you shouted, instinctively moving to follow them, but Satoru gently grasped your arm, stopping you in your tracks. 
"Hey, calm down," he urged, his voice steady despite the concern etched on his face.
But you were frantic, your mind racing with worry.
 "I can't calm down," you insisted, your voice trembling with anxiety. 
"It's been a while since Tomorrow acted like this. Something bad will happen, I just know it. That's why they ran away, to try and hide somewhere safe.” You explained. 
Satoru was about to ask you when you managed to slip off of Satoru's grip and chase after Tomorrow, leaving him standing there in confusion, a sense of regret began to gnaw at him. 
He hesitated for a moment, unsure whether to follow you or stay behind.
But as he watched you disappear into the distance, a sinking feeling settled in his chest. 
He knew deep down that he would regret not chasing after you at that moment.
Little did he know, that decision marked the beginning of a streak of bad luck that would haunt him in the days to come.
**
The following days unfolded like a nightmare for Satoru. 
With the passing of the Star Plasma Vessel and Geto's horrifying massacre of his hometown, additionally, with Geto being expelled from Jujutsu High, Satoru felt like he was drowning in despair. 
Each passing day seemed to weigh heavier on his soul, and he found himself struggling to cope with the harsh realities unfolding around him.
Unable to bear the crushing weight of the world on his shoulders, Satoru turned to sleeping pills more frequently, desperate to see you, even if only in his dreams. 
At first, he convinced himself that he was fine, that the pills were just a temporary escape from the harshness of reality.
But as time went on, he realized that he had become dependent on them, relying on their numbing effects to shield him from the pain of the world outside. 
And when he was caught, everything came crashing down around him.
Yaga's stern gaze bore into him as he slammed the bottle of sleeping pills onto the table, the harsh sound echoing through the room.
Satoru knelt before him, feeling a wave of shame and guilt wash over him as he realized the extent of his trouble.
Yaga sighed heavily, his hand rubbing his forehead in exasperation. "Satoru, I need you to explain to me why you're taking these medications when Shoko never prescribed them for you," he demanded, his tone stern.
Satoru cursed inwardly, cursing himself for leaving the door unlocked while he slept, which gave Shoko the advantage to sneak inside his dorm. 
‘If only I hadn't been so careless,’ he thought bitterly. He knew there was no escaping the truth now; he would be caught sooner or later.
Satoru met Yaga's gaze with a sigh, knowing he had no choice but to come clean.
"I just couldn't sleep at the right time with all of the mess happening these days, that's why I'm taking them," Satoru explained, carefully keeping the part about using the pills to see you.
Yaga sighed, his expression skeptical. "It feels like you're not telling the whole truth," he said, his voice tinged with disappointment.
"I am telling the truth," Satoru insisted, meeting Yaga's gaze with pleading eyes, hoping to convince him of his sincerity. 
Yaga sighed heavily, the weight of the decision evident in his expression. "I have no choice, Satoru, but to have you put on the monitor," he said regretfully. 
"We can't risk you obtaining more sleeping pills without our knowledge. You know how your clan behaves when they suspect something has happened to their heir. It's best to have Shoko come to your room periodically to prevent any conflict between your clan and Jujutsu High." Yaga explained.
Satoru sighed in defeat, knowing there was little he could do to argue against Yaga's reasoning. 
With a nod, he agreed to the arrangement, accepting the consequences of his actions.
Yaga dismissed him with a wave of his hand, and Satoru left the classroom with a heavy heart, walking through the hallway with an annoyed look, feeling the weight of his mistakes pressing down on him.
Satoru was feeling more stressed.
Shoko's heart raced as she watched Satoru emerge from the room, feeling relief and concern. Without hesitation, she hurried over to him, reaching out to grab his wrist and stop him in his tracks.
"What?" Satoru asked, annoyance evident in his tone as he turned abruptly to face her.
"Thank goodness," Shoko began, her words tumbling out in a rush of relief. "I was worried Yaga-sensei might expel you or something because of the pills-"
But before she could finish her sentence, Satoru cut her off, his frustration evident. "Why? Why did you come to my room last night?" he demanded, his voice tinged with irritation.
Caught off guard, Shoko nervously laughed, trying to diffuse the tension. "Well, I was just trying to check up on my friend. Isn't that wrong?" she asked, hoping to deflect his question.
Satoru scoffed at Shoko's response, his frustration bubbling over. "At night? Seriously? You could've come when it was daylight!" he raised his voice, his irritation palpable.
"It's not my fault that I was just worried about you, Satoru!" Shoko shouted back, her voice cracking with emotion. "I'm scared. I'm scared of what's happening to you after what happened to Geto. I-I didn't want to lose you now that Geto's gone," she explained, tears threatening to spill from her eyes.
"You could've died there, Satoru, if you'd taken more than one pill," Shoko added earnestly, her voice trembling with concern.
But Satoru seemed to dismiss her words, his frustration boiling over. "We wouldn't even be in this situation if you knew your place! This is my business, Ieri, and I don't need you to meddle in it!" he angrily expressed, his tone cutting and harsh.
Shoko flinched at the sudden intensity of his words, taken aback by the venom in his voice. It was the first time she had seen Satoru react with such anger, and it left her feeling shaken and hurt.
As Satoru walked away, leaving Shoko standing there alone, he felt a pang of guilt wash over him. 
He sighed heavily, realizing how his outburst had scared her, someone who had always been there for him. Despite his frustration, he knew he had crossed a line.
Rushing back to his dorm, he slammed the door loudly behind him, the sound echoing through the room. His hands trembled as he ruffled his hair in a disheveled state, his mind consumed by chaotic thoughts.
 The name of the sleeping pill echoed in his mind, tempting him with its false promises of escape.
With a sinking feeling, Satoru slowly began to realize the depths of his addiction to sleeping pills. It was a realization that filled him with both shame and dread, knowing that he was spiraling further into darkness with each passing day.
As Satoru struggled with his addiction to sleeping pills, he found himself haunted by memories of your sweet-drunk smile, a tantalizing allure that he couldn't shake. 
In moments of weakness, his hand would instinctively reach out as if trying to grasp onto your image, only to be met with empty air.
With a heavy sigh, Satoru covered his face with his hands, feeling the weight of his longing pressing down on him. He knew he needed to be patient, to wait for the night to come when he could hopefully find sleep without relying on the pills. 
But the knowledge that the pills had been confiscated only added to his anxiety, leaving him feeling helpless and vulnerable.
**
As Satoru found himself on the familiar hill, he couldn't shake off the feeling of unease that hung in the air.
The atmosphere, usually filled with joy and comfort, now seemed to give a gloomy vibe that unsettled him.
Searching for you, Satoru's eyes scanned the surroundings, hoping to catch a glimpse of your familiar figure. 
His heart sank when he spotted you, leaning against the tree with your back turned to him. Tomorrow was nowhere in sight, adding to the anxiety inside him.
With cautious steps, Satoru approached you, a knot of worry forming in his stomach. 
He couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong, and he feared what he might discover when he finally reached your side.
Satoru's heart sank as he knelt beside you, his concern growing as he took in the sight of your tear-streaked face. His eyes widened in shock as he noticed the swelling and blood on your cheek, his instincts kicking in as he gently wiped away the blood.
"What happened? Why are you crying? Where is Tomorrow?" Satoru's questions tumbled out in a rush, his mind racing with worry.
But as you slowly revealed what you were hiding, he was speechless. 
Satoru stared in disbelief as you slowly revealed Tomorrow's unconscious body, blood staining its fur. His breath caught in his throat as the truth sank in.
Tomorrow was dead.
As you gently placed Tomorrow's lifeless body on the ground and placed your hand on Satoru's shoulder, he tried to process the devastating turn of events. But his thoughts were interrupted by your words, leaving him in disbelief.
"Satoru, listen to me, okay?" you said, your voice trembling with emotion. "I know it's been fun to meet you here but promise me you'll stop coming here from now on."
The words hit Satoru like a knife, leaving him in shock. "Stop coming? No, no, you don't understand," he protested, desperation creeping into his voice. "You told me we could overcome this!"
Tears streamed down your face as you struggled to explain. 
"I'm... I'm sorry. I can't fulfill that promise to overcome this, not when Tomorrow's gone," you sobbed, your grief overwhelming.
"No, we- we can find some way-" Before Satoru could finish, you spoke again, your words cutting through the air like a knife. 
"No! You don't understand, Satoru! I'm nothing more than just your imagination! That's why your maids or your family can't see me back then! You... you just can't accept that I'm not real!" Your voice cracked with anguish, delivering a cold truth that left Satoru speechless.
"I... I can't stop because this is my only escape from the world that's turned its back against me," Satoru slowly explained, his voice choked with emotion as tears streamed down his face.
You reached out, gently removing his sunglasses, revealing his shining blue eyes brimming with tears of pain. Your heart ached at the sight, knowing the depth of his suffering.
"I know it's hard, but... Satoru, you need to let me go, please," you begged, your voice trembling with desperation. Despite the pain it caused you, you knew it was the only way for him to not hide away from reality.
Satoru's heart pounded in his chest as he shook his head, refusing to accept what you were saying. But you insisted, your voice filled with sorrow and resignation as you apologized for what you were about to do.
"I'm sorry for what I will do to you Satoru," you told him.
Before Satoru could protest, you pushed him with unexpected force. 
His eyes widened in shock as he stumbled backward, expecting to feel the grass beneath him. But instead, he was engulfed by darkness, falling into a black hole that seemed to swallow him whole.
Desperate to call out to you, Satoru opened his mouth to scream your name, but no sound came out. 
It was as if his voice had been stolen again, leaving him trapped in a silent void of despair.
**
Satoru's heart raced as he woke up abruptly, disoriented and gasping for breath. Panic surged through him as he tried to make sense of his surroundings, his eyes scanning the unfamiliar white ceiling above him.
"Oh god, you're finally awake," a voice exclaimed, and Satoru quickly turned to see Shoko standing beside him.
"Why am I here?" Satoru asked, his voice trembling with confusion as he attempted to sit up, but Shoko gently stopped him.
"Stop moving, you've been in a coma for like 3 days," Shoko explained, her voice tinged with concern.
Satoru's eyes widened in shock at the revelation, his mind struggling to comprehend what had happened during those lost days of unconsciousness.
As Satoru processed Shoko's words, flashes of memories flooded his mind, each one more painful than the last. 
He remembered the broken look on your face, the tears streaming down your cheeks as you pleaded with him to stop coming back, to let you go.
The image of you holding Tomorrow's lifeless body, your grief-stricken expression etched into his memory, haunted him. 
He felt a heavy weight settle in his chest as he stared at his hands, grappling with the realization that maybe he had caused you so much pain.
What has gone wrong?
Shoko observed how lost Satoru seemed in his thoughts, his expression clouded with confusion. With a sigh, she gently drew his attention back to the present.
"I think you were consuming too many of the pills," Shoko stated, her tone laced with concern. 
"It's left you malnourished. I never thought I'd see a day when you'd be malnourished... Were you not eating enough food after school?"
Satoru blinked, surprised by her observation. "I do eat," he replied, his voice tinged with defensiveness. 
"I just feel really sleepy after class, so I head to bed early." Despite his explanation, he couldn't shake the unease that settled in the pit of his stomach.
Shoko eyed Satoru suspiciously, her intuition telling her that there was more to the story. 
"But you still managed to fall asleep in Sensei's class, even though you got enough sleep after class?" she pressed her tone firm.
Caught off guard, Satoru choked on his saliva, feeling caught once again. 
"Sensei's class is boring!" he blurted out, attempting to defend himself with a weak excuse. 
But even as the words left his mouth, he knew that Shoko saw right through his feeble attempt to deflect the conversation.
She only sighed and continued to discuss his condition and the need for him to stay in the infirmary room for the time being, Satoru listened attentively, though his mind was elsewhere. 
His thoughts were consumed by you, by the desperate need to find a way to fix what had gone wrong between you two.
Even as Shoko left the room to give him some rest, Satoru couldn't shake the weight of his guilt and the ache of his longing for you.
He glanced down at his arm, confirming what Shoko said that he was indeed malnourished. 
He knew he should be eating, but the thought of food left him feeling nauseous, his appetite suppressed by his overwhelming emotions.
Closing his eyes, Satoru tried to sleep, hoping to find solace in the dream where he could see you again and make things right. But in his dream…
He never saw you at the top of the hill.
**
Satoru groggily muttered, "Fuck, what day is it?" as he rubbed his tired eyes. 
It had been a week since he started isolating himself in the infirmary room. 
Unable to accept the reality that every time he slept, he couldn't meet you, instead finding himself trapped in a dark void that haunted him, he struggled to find rest, battling with insomnia.
Whenever Shoko tried to check up on him, he would turn his infinity on, shutting himself off from the outside world.
He couldn't bear the thought of anyone touching him, not when he couldn't distinguish between reality and the fading memory of you.
Satoru's head swiveled softly towards the door at the sound of the knock, but he remained silent, refusing to acknowledge Yaga's presence.
"Satoru, I heard what happened. I placed some food by the door so you can open up and eat," Yaga's voice filtered through the door, a note of concern evident in his tone.
"I know it's hard, but please let Shoko check up on you. We need to find the problem you're facing right now."
But Satoru shook his head, his hand instinctively covering his ear, blocking out Yaga's words. He had no desire to hear from him anymore.
Anxiety rushed through Satoru, overwhelming him as he felt desperate to see you again. 
His thoughts raced, his heart pounding with the need to escape the suffocating darkness that surrounded him.
In a moment of desperation, he remembered the stash of sleeping pills hidden away in one of the drawers in the infirmary room. 
Without hesitation, he got out of bed, his movements frantic as he searched through every drawer, his hands trembling with anticipation.
Each drawer he opened revealed nothing but disappointment, sending a surge of frustration coursing through him. 
As Satoru frantically searched through the drawers, his agitation growing with each empty one he encountered, he muttered under his breath, "Where is it?"
His voice was tinged with desperation, his hands shaking as he rifled through the contents, his heart pounding with the need to find the sleeping pills.
As Satoru's hands finally closed around the container of sleeping pills, a sense of relief washed over him. 
Without hesitation, he opened the container and tipped the remaining pills into his hand. 
He knew he should only take one, but the overwhelming desperation to see you again clouded his judgment.
In a reckless act, he swallowed all the pills in one swift motion, ignoring the warning signs flashing in his mind.
The room spun around him, his vision growing dizzy as he collapsed to the ground, the effects of the pills taking hold with frightening speed.
**
Satoru woke up to find himself lying on the grass in an endless field, he stood up to dust off the dirt on his clothes before he proceeded to shout.
Satoru's voice echoed across the endless field as he shouted you and Tomorrow's name, his desperation showed in every word. "I'm sorry, please! Don't just push me away like that!" he pleaded, his voice tinged with anguish.
Before he could continue shouting, a magical sound filled the air, causing him to turn around. His heart skipped a beat as he saw a glowing figure standing before him, eerily identical to you.
"[Reader's Name]?" Satoru whispered, his voice barely above a breath. But before he could reach out to touch you, the glowing figure turned and ran, disappearing into the distance.
Driven by an overwhelming sense of longing, Satoru chased after the figure, his heart pounding in his chest as he searched desperately for a way to reach that glowing person.
As Satoru continued to chase the glowing figure across the endless field, time seemed to blur together, the passage of hours unnoticed in his desperate chase. 
It was only when he felt the sun beginning to set, casting a golden hue over the landscape, that he realized how much time had passed.
Finally, the glowing figure slowed to a stop, and Satoru halted as well, his chest heaving with exertion. "Is that you?" he gasped out, his voice barely a whisper as he stared at the radiant form before him.
But no matter how much he strained to see, the figure's face remained obscured by the intense light, leaving Satoru with more questions than answers. 
The frustration and longing welled up inside him, an ache in his heart that seemed impossible to soothe.
The glowing figure approached Satoru, their touch gentle as they caressed his cheek, a bittersweet warmth emanating from their hand. As they spoke, their words pierced through Satoru's heart like a knife, each syllable carrying the weight of undeniable truth.
"They're gone. They're just your imagination," the figure said softly, their voice echoing in the empty expanse of the field. "You need to let them go."
Tears threatened to spill from Satoru's eyes as he shook his head in denial. "No, no, it can't be," he protested, his voice trembling with anguish.
"They were created by your mind when you were a child, desperate for friends," the glowing figure continued, their tone filled with compassion. "Now that you're growing into adulthood, your mind is beginning to reject them, to erase them. But your heart clings to them, unwilling to let go. Please, forget them, or it will only hurt them more."
Satoru's heart felt heavy with grief as he grappled with the painful realization that you and Tomorrow may have only ever existed within the confines of his imagination. But even as he struggled to accept the truth, a part of him resisted, unwilling to relinquish the memories and the love he held for you both.
As the truth sank in, Satoru's heart clenched with sorrow, understanding now why Tomorrow had run away. 
Their instincts had sensed the impending rejection by his mind, prompting them to seek refuge in hiding.
"Will I ever meet them?" Satoru asked, his voice tinged with a mix of hope and resignation as he gazed at the glowing figure before him, though he already knew the answer.
"Unfortunately, I don't have the right to tell you that," the figure replied, their voice filled with a gentle sadness. "I only came here to see your determination to [reader's name]."
Satoru's heart sank at the confirmation of what he had feared. 
"They're in a better place for them now, don't worry," the glowing figure reassured Satoru, their words offering a glimmer of solace amid his anguish.
Satoru's lips curled into a soft smile at the thought of you and Tomorrow finding peace, but it was quickly overshadowed by the overwhelming flood of tears that spilled from his eyes. With a heavy heart, he sank to his knees, the weight of his grief pressing down on him like a crashing wave.
As he cried out in anguish, consumed by the pain of loss, he didn't even notice how the glowing figure slowly began to fade away, their presence fading into the darkness of the night. 
Alone in the dim light of the setting sun, Satoru whispered his apologies into the empty expanse of the field, his words lost to the vastness of the night sky.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry [reader's name]," he murmured, his voice filled with a raw, unspoken sorrow that echoed into the darkness.
I’ll never forget you [reader’s name]...
I’ll never ever forget you, I promise…
I’ll never… who am I not supposed to forget?
Satoru's head snapped up, a surge of panic coursing through him as he struggled to recall the name of the person he shouldn't be forgetting. 
"No—no, who— who was it?!" he exclaimed frantically, his mind racing in a desperate attempt to grasp onto the fading memory.
With trembling hands, he opened his palm and used his finger as an imaginary pen, trying to spell out the name of that person. 
But try as he might, all he could manage was to draw a line, his efforts futile as the name slipped further and further from his grasp.
Tears stung his eyes once more as the weight of his forgetfulness settled upon him, a crushing reminder of the fragments of his reality slipping away. In that moment of vulnerability, he felt utterly lost.
Satoru cried out in pain as his head throbbed, feeling like it might explode. He tried to stand up but stumbled and fell again. 
Everything spun around him, and he couldn't find his balance. Before he knew it, he was falling into the darkness once more, feeling helpless and scared he screamed, but his voice disappeared into the black hole. 
He felt like he was disappearing too, lost in the darkness and unable to find his way back.
***
"Satoru!" The voice called out urgently, pulling Satoru from the depths of unconsciousness. His eyes fluttered open, his vision blurry as he struggled to make out the figures hovering over him.
As his surroundings slowly came into focus, Satoru realized he was lying in an infirmary bed. Shoko and Yaga stood beside him, their expressions a mix of concern and relief.
"Satoru, thank goodness you're awake," Shoko exclaimed, her voice filled with worry. "We were so worried about you. You almost didn't make it. You overdosed on the sleeping pills, but thankfully, you survived."
Yaga nodded solemnly, his brow furrowed with concern. "You gave us quite a scare, Satoru," he added, his voice tinged with relief that Satoru had pulled through.
Satoru's heart clenched with guilt as he listened to their words, the realization of how close he had come to losing everything hitting him like a punch to the gut. 
“I’m sorry” Satoru's voice trembled as he muttered a heartfelt apology, tears welling up in his eyes once more. 
Shoko and Yaga moved closer to him, offering words of comfort and reassurance, their presence a source of solace in his moment of vulnerability.
Throughout the day, they spoke to him, their words a steady stream of support and encouragement. 
But despite their efforts to console him, Satoru's mind remained preoccupied with thoughts of the person he had been trying so desperately to remember.
Who are you?
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anonymouscheeses · 8 days
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Im sorry i have to say it..: Get Your Hands Dirty sounds like a love song.
HEAR. ME. OUTT!! (No i dont mean a love song between Chloe n Ella omg 😭)
What I'm implying here is that it sounds like one of those niche high school love stories when one of the lovers(most likely a goodie two-shoes) goes to their mentor/parent/even the person their loving/etc to ask for advice on relationships. Or more specifically, if this person is worth it or even a good person. From the top of my head: I Won't Say (I'm In Love) and the goodie and the wildchild dynamic is pretty similar to Gabriella and Troy from hs musical, which iws(iil) kinda inspired this post tbh but also ive been thinking about this ever since i first watched the movie. (You plop in ur own songs, i js KNOW this trope exists)
Now that we've established the well used niche trope existing in this niche song made by the niche king that is Disney.... why do i think that Get Your Hands Dirty is a love song, i hear?
Lets analyze THE LYRIICS 😈😈
"Right and wrong, cruel and kind, who's to say?" "There's a code that I believe in."
"Robin Hood" "yeah?" "Awesome guy" "yeah!"
"Every choice, you're gonna find there's shades of grey." "There are rules for a reason!"
"So you could then cross that line, theoretically."
"You'd agree?" "But he stole for the poor."
"The decision's always up to you. When there's only one thing left to do"
"I don't know you anymore.."
Okay, so i shortened and made it tiny for obvious reasons, that bein its too long 😭 so! AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO GETS A FEEELIN?? a feelin that this is SCREAMING denial?! Its giving...
Chloe: Ellaaaa.... this girl im talkn to is SOOO HHHOOOOTT and PRETTY and cool and stuff but ugh.... SHE EEEVILLL!!
Ella: oh my gosh.. STFU. Shes prolly not even that evil ill prove it smh..
*get ur hands dirty starts playing. No exaggeration. No cap.*
"Okay, but there's some universal truths you must recognize." "Like?"
"Valiant knights, pure and good, guaranteed" "That depends on what they're fighting for"
"Creepy witches selling potions for evil deeds" "She could have kids she's providing for"
"If your good-good things will come to you"
MORE denial, Chloe wants to be friends with Red SO bad she looks stupid, but she brings herself back by trying to prove to herself that she's evil and they SHOULDN'T be that close. Which also is a big sign of comphet and heteronormativity, i would know 🧍 (which is a post for another day i might make. Prolly 2 prove that Chloe is a lesbian in deep comphet)
"But just how far do you go? How much do you compromise? Oh, tell me, how do you know. Where do you draw the line?"
"There's nothing I wouldn't do. If my heart tells me it's right. If it's for someone I love. If it's to save a life."
"To save your life."
Further deepening the trope i mentioned. The first line could be interpreted as a double meaning since the song is kind of mostly about Chloe coming to terms with the fact Red isn't really evil or as bad as she thought, plus the argument of where the line between evil and good is. It could refer to Red or Ella, maybe both, but Ella changes the meaning with her own experiences so it drifts off the focus from Red because we cant have ANYTHING 🤧 but i still believe Chloe intended it to be for Red since the entire song is really just for the progress of their relationship n stuff.
Now this could definitely all be in my head, yes, Disney would most likely NEVER canonize or even imply heavily a queer relationship or anything lgbtq on a pre established franchise (cowards.). But there is always a chance.... deep inside the dark heart of the mouse..
Plus, with the subtle hints here and there of Red and Chloe's relationship growing, romantically or not, they are still super close and love eachother alot. Chloe is js (kinda) canonically a girl kisser who cant help but find a girl kissable (same)
And don't get me started on this movie and its obsession with love and proving how it is not "ain't it". Hello...? They set the tone of love, but i see NO person close enough to Red established for this message (other than Chloe) and if they introduce some random guy in the next movies, NO ONE would care nor would they want it unless somehow its 100x better than redcharming, but thats impossible cz wlw 4 life.
So, this entire thingy is me basically finding scraps and wanting to provr that charminghearts IS canon and WILL be established soon! (Im delulu)
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colectingstrz · 8 months
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INCOMPATIBLE HARMONY
⤿ a beautiful passion of hatred driving a narrow pathway for foreign emotions and surging familiar ones.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
𐙚 g: enimes to lovers, university au, fluff here and there, angst. wc: 10.6k w: one kiss and mentions of a parent passing p: Jay x f reader
𐙚 - like 70% proof read it’s so long I tried 😪
౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ
Your mother always said, “Either kill or be killed,” and you regrettably learned the hard way. Life is not easy, and it never will be. You must work for your goals and eliminate any potential distractions, even if they are those you care about. Everything that matters is success. Yet with more independence and freedom of choice u start to crack a little straying further and further away from the motto showing weakness and vulnerability. Success no longer being your priority as you found your focus on a particular someone.
you certainly would not mind eliminating a specific individual , a pest.. a loud, foul mouthed, vile, obnoxious, beastly, filthy inconvenience such as park.
It's not surprising to hear Jay harbours the same feelings as you; it's almost romantic when you think about it. Two people with a passionate desire hatred for one another.
౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹
Unfortunately, your Monday became more dreary when you met him waiting outside your professor's door, whom you had intended to meet.
“What are you doing here” Jay ignored you and continued typing stuff on his phone. The sound of his fingers aggressively tapping on his screen bothered you. “Hello? You know it's rude to ignore somebody while they're addressing you.”
Finally, he raises his deep, dismal eyes to meet yours. “I'm so sorry your majesty I didn't like your tone” he said with a grin “what's wrong with my tone? this is how I always talk why are your..so dramatic” You crossed your arms, your tolerance dwindling as you endured this discourse.
“No... today your tone seems more boooorish” you raised an eyebrow at his strange choice of words; you had no understanding what he had just said, which irritated you even more. You despised the way he used sophisticated vocabulary as if he were from 1985. “Do you want to purposefully mislead me? What do you think because you use fancy phrases, you're better than me, you antiquated freak”
Jay grinned. You despised it when he smiled because it felt like he was mocking you, it made you feel little, and you despised every moment of it. “Intentionally yes I'm glad to see it's working it brings me joy to see u distressed-and confused when I mess with ur little narrow minded brain maybe if u spent ur time reading rather than selling ur self out at party's every weekend you would actually know what im saying half the time”
You close your eyes sighing loudly as you try to compose your anger. He was wrong so wrong
Jay smirked as he recognised he had won. Picking up his bag, he approaches you and gently pats over your shoulder, “What's wrong? Can't bite back? Better luck next time, love.” Before you could respond, he walks away, descending down the corridor, leaving you to throw an internal fit as you accept your defeat.
౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹
“Are you coming to Jake's party tonight? It's at his beach mansion” you shrug as you begin to gather your belongings from your desk. “I'm not sure... with this approaching test, I need time to study.” Yujin rolls her eyes, grasping your arm in a plea “Pleaaaaaaaaaaseeee I don't wanna go by myself it's just one party it's not going to ruin your perfect 4.0 GDA!” you lightly break free from her grasp, “correction it's GPA.. and stop clinging onto me like a leech I know damm well u have plenty of other friends if I don't come it's not the end of the world” She groans.
“What if it is the end of the world! your my best freind I want to go with you w..what if I pass out ?? What if I.. uh.. get lost” she blurs out nonsense and you watch in disbelief shaking your head, preparing to turn and leave.
“Park Sunghoon is comming by the way”
You come to a halt in your tracks, slowly turning around. “Really?..Are you saying that only to get me to co- “yes! Really, he's back from France now; there's no way he'll miss Jake's party.” You sigh deeply, pondering whether a single male who is cute is more essential than your future. “I'll think about it.” Yujin smiles, grabbing you in an embrace and showering you with thank yous as if you answered yes (deep down you know it was a yes as well), before she swiftly leaves for her next class.
What you felt for Sunghoon was like a disease, slowly devouring you from the inside out. You've been pinning for him since your first year of university, and you thought it was just a crush until it wasn't. Now, a year later, your feelings have grown stronger. You would do anything to be in the same space as him-not to talk just to admire from afar You were a woman of many words, but in this instance, Sunghoon was different. It's as if you lost the basic mechanics of communication when talking to him; it's too embarrassing to go through again, so you avoid it at all costs and prefer to admire his features . Even in group setting with your friends you keep your conversations to a minimum.
And, of course, evil forces decided to flirt with and entice you once more by bringing not just Sunghoon but also his pest of a friend Jay into your presence as you make your way down the hall to your next class.
“Oh hey y/n it's been a while” Sunghoon smiles as he embraces you cheerfully. “Oh..h..hi umm how was France and the skating Ice- um, I mean ice skating,” you mentally leaped in front of a bus and ran yourself over 76 times because of the idiotic mistake you just made in front of him. “The ice skating competition was good I should hear back in about a week if I've qualified for the semi finals how have you been?” He looks at you intently and quietly, waiting for your response, while Jay silently notes every element of your expression. Both of their stares made you feel little uneasy, as if you were a vase on display in a museum, attracting a lot of attention. You felt your palms start to sweat.
“That's great to hear! Um.. I've been alright just p..preparing for exams right now.” You give him a constant smile, attempting to distract him from your inability to pronounce a simple basic ass word. “Yikes, midterms.. Hope you do well-Oh! Are you going to Jake's party? Or are you going to study? Parties weren't always your thing” Just as you open your mouth to speak, a rat joins in on the conversation despite the fact that he was not invited.
“Sunghoon it seems you've been gone a while she loves parties I see her at them all with that yujin girl I'm sure she won't miss this one will you y/n?” You glare at Jay, directing your focus to him, and imagine all the horrible ways you would torture him for ruining a moment with your crush. “I'm sure she can speak for herself, and trust me, Jay y/n is not a party girl... well, I have a class to go to, so maybe I'll see you at the party,” he smiles one final time before walking away, leaving you and Jay in solitude.
“Do you lack basic manners? Why are you entering into a conversation that has nothing to do with you? He was talking to meeee the last time I checked, and your not y/n.”He shrugged, “My manners are perfect, thank you very much, and I'm open to adding my two cents wherever I want to; all I did was state the facts.” You roll your eyes and reposition your back to hang over your shoulder.
“Facts? Stop acting like you know me Jay, you don't. You're not my friend, you're not my anything. Stay out of my business and my life.” You leave him as quickly as you spoke, bumping your shoulder against his as you storm down the hall.
Something you said right then must have touched a chord, since Jay's mood plummeted for the rest of the day.
౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹
Parties are just mobs of people, the perfect place for germs to hibernate and circulate like wildfire, with loud music that bursts your eardrums, piles of sweaty bodies, and excessive amounts of alcohol. You don't see what Yujin sees in this type of activity, but the show must go on, and it's too late to back out now.
Deeper within the mashion are Jay, Jake Sunghoon, and Jungwon, who are playing pool round after round. “Sunghoon, did you find any hot French girls or what?”Jake asks, peeking over to see Sunghoon as he effortlessly knocks down two of his targets into the hole. “Ice skating pre occupied me.. plus I still like her”
Now that Jay has disconnected from his talk with Jungwon, his ears immediately peek up at the sound of Sunghoon's crush, and he listens in curiously. He rarely discusses such topics, especially after his heartache with his ex Chaewon.
“Her? Omg bro it’s been monthhhhs” sunghoon sighs “I know.. but she’s just really pretty and kind I really want to get to know her more this year” Jake laughs placing a hand on his chest “ get to know her? Last year you barely held a conversation with the girl u need to work on your game if u wanna bag a girl like y/n”
Jay lifts his brow in disbelief and confusion. Sunghoon liked you. Considering the millions of girls he could have picked. Jay was completely baffled. Great distress surged over him. He became so outraged that he could no longer bear to listen to the discourse. Jay turns to the pool table, leaving a perplexed Jungwon in the middle of his sentence.
“Do you like y/n? Really, dude? Raise your standards.” Jake's mouth drops agape at his comment, and Sunghoon crosses his arms. “Yeah, I like her, and what about it? I think She's a great girl, what's it to you?” Sunghoon now turns to Jay, looking him down. The mood in the room shifts, and Jungwon, who is watching from a distance, becomes anxious about what is going on.
“It's nothing to do with me I'm just looking out for you as a freind she's not a good person” Sunghoon doesn't say anything for a time and simply stares at Jay. “Maybe u haven't had a good experience with her.. that's your opinion but I've had good with her and I'll stick to my opinion thanks for the concern bro” Sunghoon turns, grabs his drink, and leaves the room.
Jay gulped, grabbing the edge of the pool table firmly in rage. How could Sunghoon not realise what an awful person you were? All he wanted was to look out for him. Again, everything is always your fault. Jay groans as he steps outdoors, leaving the manshion.
He walks outdoors on the sidewalk, trailing his feet. He stares ahead to the shore, watching the clam ripples of water. He groans and walks on, but he comes to a halt when he notices you coaching against the wall with your head down.
He immediately becomes enraged again; it was your fault he was out here, and it was your reason he got into a fight with Sunghoon. He comes up to you talking this opportunity to throw a dig “so much for not being a party girl look at you here all drunk and wasted outside on the floor no self composure what so ever”
He waits, but your witty retort never arrives. He lifts his brow lightly, bending down to shove you, but is met once more with the presence of stillness. Jay feels an awful discomfort in his gut. He bends down to get a closer look, only to find your eyes closed and your hand grasping your chest while you breathe extensively.
“Y/n?… Hey y/n” he holds your shoulder trying to urge a response. “t..to many..” he moves his head closer angling his ear towards you “repeat that for me” you muster all the strength in your body to speak “c..claustrophobic..I’m..clau..” Jay hums in realisation.
He thinks quickly on his feet sitting down on the concrete, reaching for your hand and replacing the one on your chest with his own. “Listen to me right now. I need you to breathe in and out slowly, with 3 seconds in between, okay? Can u do that for me” you weakly nod, obeying his directions.
Each time you did, he would lightly sweeze your hand in encouragement, giving you reassuring “well done’s”and “your getting there's” the whole affair felt strange to you. He was really pleasant, calm, patient, and caring towards you. It was rare for Jay this came out of nowhere, but you didn't question it and accepted it with open arms because you needed it.
Shortly after you find your self calm. But the lingering feeling of jays eyes on you as the two of you sit in silence was uncomfortable. You find your self subconsciously looking down to your feet playing with your fingers. “So.. your claustrophobic I never knew that” you shrug still looking down “well yeah.. it’s not a big deal anyways” he hummus “seems like a pretty big deal if it weren’t for me you would have passed out”
You roll your eyes “no I would have been fine this isn’t the first time I topically do this alone no assistance needed park” Jay humms again his hand reaching to cup your chin forcing you to raise your head and look at him. You were shocked at the sudden contact and the way his hand felt so warm againt your cold skin. “Well..um are you okay now looking at your face you seem it” he then used his hand to turn your head slightly as he analyses your face. “I’m..I’m fine thank you”
A tingly feeling perks within him but he shuts it down nodding removing his hand from your skin. The absence of warmth had you feeling cold again but you brushed it off. Jay suddenly stands up dusting dirt off his back and reaches out his hand to you “come I’ll drive you home I’m assuming you woukd rather not go back in there” he raises a brow you nod hesitantly accepting his hand as he wraps it around your firmly.
“My car is about a 10 min walk are u fine with that? Well doesn’t matter if ur not we still have to walk regardless just letting you know anyway” you laugh a little feeling the sense of familiarity again this was more like jay. More like the jay you knew more like the jay you were used too. Yet that feeling in your stomach didn’t leave.
“Don’t do this again” you raise a brow “pardon?” Jay turns to you “going out in the dark at night in some alley by yourself something easily could have happened to you and no one would be there to save you” you roll your eyes “I know u don’t actually care about what happens to me stop acting like you do plus.. I was close to the beach house I would have been fine” jay sighs shaking his head “belive it all not im not a horrible human being your a girl and that make sure automatically vulnerable alone at night im just warning you love”
You humm “just save me next time then” you finnaly turn to look at him awaiting his reaction as he silently looks at you not saying a word. You quickly look away now feeling awkward regretting your exsistnce.
“Pay me I’m not playing superman for free”
Now at the car it’s mostly silent but a comfortable silence never in your life would you think you would be in jays car having him drive you to your dorm but life is full of surprises isn’t it. Soon you arrive home giving him a Short and firm bye before heading to your door.
Little to your knowledge even once you have entered your dorm Jay remains in his car watching you until he sees the lights shine in ur room confirming you have settled.
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Studying was supposed to be peaceful and quiet, but all of that was disrupted the moment you invited Jake to join you.
You wouldn't call him a nuisance, but he was more distracting than anything else. Every 4 minutes, he'd start chatting about strange stuff, and when he wasn't talking, he'd be toying with your hair or poking your check unless he was performing some random asmr with his pen. Sometimes you wish you could just duct wrap his mouth so he would stop talking.
“Jake... please I'm really trying to focus here you know I have an exam soon” he looks down as if you had just rejected or something it made you feel a little bad “Fine.. if you want me gone just say that!” He crosses his arms and looks away, and you sigh, rubbing his shoulder, “It's not that it’s just you talk too much, I need quiet... on second thought yeah, leave, we can hang out later.” You sigh and Jake's mouth opens wide at your unexpected change of direction, huffing silently as he turns to go.
Peace and quiet has made a comeback
You smile to yourself as you study, but as usual, your tranquilly is short-lived when you hear the loud smack of a book beside you. Looking up, there's no one but jay. You raise a curious eyebrow; hardly one visits this section of the library unless a friend tags along, and you've never seen Jay here.
“What brings you here you don't come here this is my space” Jay ignores you, bringing out his laptop, iPad, and any extra papers. “I've come here to study obviously your not the only one who has exams here and last time I checked your name isn't plastered anywhere here so this is everyone's space,” he smiles and returns to getting his stuff.
You groan, your gaze returning to your laptop to drown him out and remain focused. However, that was difficult to do given how fiercely he was looking at you.
“Um, is there a reason why you keep looking at me like that? It makes me uncomfortable.” Jay's eyes stay hanging on yours. “Looking at you? what is it a crime to look at another human being? Arrest me.” He rolls his eyes. You shake your head, closing your laptop and giving him your entire attention.
“Your looking at me like ur going to eat me alive I don't like it please direct your eyes Literally anywhere else” Jay chuckles, moving his head closer to the point your noses would almost just almost connect . “Maybe I should eat you so I don't have to hear your nagging every day. I'll devour you whole nice and slow..how does that sound?”
Unbeknownst to you, a flush rushed across your ears, to which Jay saw with a wide grin. “That's!..that's really inappropriate, Jay. You can't just say things like that to a woman.” He tilts his head, leaning closer. His hot breath stimulating your exposed skin.
“I didn't mean it in that way get your head out of the gutter you.. naughty girl tsk” he paused for a second before starting again “plus I don't really see you as a woman” you raise a brow in disbelief and offence.
“So you’re gay?”
He then abruptly moved back. “Gay? Don't make such a misleading statement; I'm really attracted to women.” You smile slightly, seeing this as an opportunity to twist him even further. “But if you do not view me as a woman, you must see me as a man? And you want to devour this man whole, don't you? Nice and slow Don't worry, your secret is safe with me,” you giggle, covering your mouth from laughing so hard as you watched the dread drown out his face, which turned pale.
“Shut up you’re always so loud and wrong you really think I like men?” You nod “this conversation is proof right here of the Jay is gay statement” Jay places his fingers gently squeezing his temple in vexation. He didn’t appreciate being accused of liking men when he clearly is straight and didn’t like that it was you out of all people.
But
Suddenly he felt the need-the urge to prove it to you he wanted to show you just how wrong you were he wanted to put you in your place and shut you up. So he did just that
Jay leans over in a matter of seconds, one hand behind your neck, the other yanking on your lanyard, forcing tight proximity as he slams his lips against yours. If someone walked in right now, they wouldn't believe their eyes. You didn’t belive it yourself.
His lips brushed against yours, softly and carefully, like you were fragile and he was scared to shatter or harm you. His lips graced yours like butterfly wings, just long enough for him to inhale your breath, feeling the warmth of your skin in his palm as he pulled you in deeper, and the flavour of your strawberry lipgloss lingered in his head, driving him insane.
As soon as it started it quickly ended as you somehow snapped back into reality and roughly pushed him for you. Not wanting to meet his gaze you turn hastily packing your things and leaving as quickly as possible. Leaving a stunned and confused Jay alone in the library.
You slide your back down the wall of an empty corridor, like a dramatic main lead In a teenage drama attempting to regain your calm and gain a grasp of what happened just a few seconds earlier. Were you crazy--or was he crazy? Why did he kiss you, and why was it so long? Most importantly, why did you like it? You loved it You smacked yourself to recover your focus. Choosing to disregard this portion of the day as if it never occurred so that you can sleep soundly tonight.
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After ten minutes of overthinking your life choices in the lounge area, the bell rings for lunch. You grab your phone and text Yunjin to come meet you as soon as possible. She soon appears and sits next to you. You had intentions of telling her but you couldn’t bring yourself too
“What's so urgent that you nee- you having a bad makeup day?” You lift your eyebrow “What?” “My makeup is fine, what do you mean?" she shakes her head, pointing to your lips. “Not your entire makeup, just your lip makeup, it's all smudged.” Flickers of the kiss swarm in your thoughts, making you nauseous.
You quickly get out your mirror attempting to fix it.
“Jay can I ask you something?” Jay nods as he takes a bite out of his sandwich “you smell unusual today” Jay raises an eyebrow, causing Jungwon and Sunghoon to focus on Jake's words: “Yeah, I noticed you smelled kinda fruity today, like... starberries” Jungwon continues, causing Jake to nod in agreement, “I don't smell like that; you're probably smelling something else.”
Unknowingly, while Jay continued to eat, seemingly a little concerned by the claims, Sunghoon discreetly watched Jay, his gaze fixed on the faint hint of lipgloss on his lips.
“Oh my gosh... look at his lips, there's lipgloss. You must have had some action before lunchtime,” Jake wriggles his brows, elbowing Jay. He gulps uneasily, caressing his lip and instantly recalling what he had done; he closes his eyes in regret. “Unless…ur gay? Or something I don’t discriminate ” Jake patted his shoulder
“I knew it I knew u were gay” jay now shoots his head up at that voice your voice as you and yunjin approach his table. You and yunjin were freinds with the rest of jays freinds and sometimes would eat with them though yunjin would limit interactions with jay as by her words “any enemy of my friends is an enemy of mine”
“Jay is gay?” Sunghoon laughs and finally joins the conversation, “Jay and gay, that rhymes!” Jake yelled earning some looks directed at your table Jay simply scowls, “Shut up, both of you.” Jay stands up and grabs his bag and sandwich before leaving. You sighed with relief as he went; sitting directly opposite him seemed wired after what had happened.
It appears that both of you failed to sleep well that night, so you spent it studying to pass the time, while Jay spent it twisting and turning in his bed, extremely upset and ashamed by his irresponsible behaviour. He wishes he could go back in time and prevent it from ever happening.
However, the burning sensation in his chest could not be ignored, and the taste of your strawberry lipgloss lingered on his tongue. He closed his eyes, remembering the taste and feel of your soft lips on his.
The next day was difficult, primarily because you had a council meeting, and of course the vice president had to be Jay, and you the head sadly had a private meeting every 15th, which left you two sitting in an office in silence
“Sooooo..” You spoke but no other words left your lips “should we reschedule this meeting at this rate we will make no progress if you can't even look me in the eye” you grimace a little
“Maybe if a certain somone didn’t just pull up and force themselves onto me I could look them in the eye” you whisper slightly folding your arms turning away. “Force? I didn’t force myself onto you it was mutual” you raise a brow “was it how?”
“You kissed me back and even added your tongue a little; you were clearly into it and wanted it- “shut up please” you placed your fingers on his lips, shushing him before he could humiliate you any further. “Can we change the subject I’m begging” Jay wanted to say more, but judging by your tone and look, he held back.
“Sorry” now, for the first time since this meeting began, you choose to look him in the eye “it was wrong of my to just kiss you out of nowhere I didn't respect your boundaries and I apologise” stunned, you remained silent for a moment before answering “thank you Jay” you smile a little for a split second before it fades away, not wanting to smile for too long because it's Jay after all.
He nods “can we like.. forget this ever happened” you don’t know what it is that you felt then but it was unsettling. You gulped it down agreeing with jays words. “Then let’s start this meeting then”
After a long 30-minute meeting, you and Jay split ways. You go to the library again because you have some free time and run into Sunghoon along the way. You consider many options for running. It's too late; he's already noticed you and invited you to come over.
“hi Sunghoon,” he smiles, waving, “hi y/n, so... do you have any free time right now?” You said, with a nod, “wanna come watch me practise at the rink?” You nodded again, but this time with too much enthusiasm, like a dog. You were embarrassed, but it was difficult to contain your excitement.
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It was chilly. Fortunately, Sunghoon, being the gentleman he is, offered you his puffer, and even though you declined it 15 times, he insisted on forcing you to put it on and zipping you up. The attention in this situation felt good.
You stared in admiration as he skated; he was truly in his element, doing what he does best. You were captivated by how beautifully he swirled and twirled. You hoped you could watch him every day if your schedule wasn't so busy. Interrupting your little display, Yujin texted you.
Yapper: me and the guys are comming over the the rink to ice skate do you wanna come with?
Me: I’m already there? I’m watching Sunghoon practice :)))
Yapper : ARE U LOT ON A ICEY SKATEY DATE? ARE WE INTERRUPTING
Me: NO. He just asked since I also had a free you guys can still come it would be fun I’ll let Sunghoon know
Yapper: if you say so 👀 and btw your bestie is comming
Me: shut up you know dam well he’s not my “bestie” call him that again and I’ll block you
Calling out to Sunghoon, you step down and stand at the edge so he can hear you. “The others are coming down to skate by the way." Sunghoon nods. “Is Jay coming?” You're confused as this was such an unusual and precise inquiry to ask; he should just assume he's coming. You wanted to question further.
“Why are you asking? Is there a reason he shouldn't come?" Sunghoon hastily shakes his head, “I was only wondering—“why? Did something happen?” Sunghoon shakes his head again, “no, I just want to know that's all,” you humm, not believing a word he says. It's times like these that your psychology major comes in handy it was obvious he was lying to you. “Jay is coming”
Soon after they arrived, as you had previously briefed Sunghoon, he prepared and distributed everyone's skates. Jake eagerly put on his skates, excited and ready to go and followed Sunghoon towards the rink. Even when Jungwon and Yujin joined, you still struggled to put on your left shoe.
You attempted to fit your foot in again but failed. You were ready to give up and just watch instead.
“Are you gonna cry over an ice skate?” He teased triggering your frown “No!..this is just really hard” you turn back and try to put it back on for the fifth time. Jay rises up and crouches down in front of you, keeping the shoe in place.
“What are you—“helping I'm helping you, dumbass I'm holding the shoe in place so you can put your foot in, go on.” You comply, pushing your foot in with ease. Before you could reach down to tie the lace, Jay beats you to it, tapping your foot lightly once he's finished. “Thanks” Jay hummed as he turned to leave. Realisation came over you immediately, and you grabbed the hem of his jeans. “Wait, I don't think I can walk on my own. Just help me to the entrance” Jay grumbled, carrying your body up with ease.
“I'll just hold your hand the whole way and bring you to Yujin alright” you agreed, and he now held your hand in his, and you felt the warmth again, just like that night. You didn’t want to let go. Though from afar a pair of flaming eyes watched the scene unfold
“Come on Sunghoon I'm showing you my spin!” Jake yelled as he dragged Sunghoon's arm, diverting his attention. Despite this, Sunghoon cast glances at you and Jay as you entered the rink hand in hand, like some corny couple, and clinched his teeth in anger.
“This is so scary!” Jay glances at you, “You haven't done this before?” You shake your head. “No... this is all new to me, which is why I couldn't do my other shoe properly.” Jay now turns to you, putting your other hand in his. “Do you want me to show you something? I won't let go; don't worry, I'm not the evil creature you see me to be” his comment makes you chuckle “you sooo are if there wasn't any witness I'm so confident you would let go and leave me to fall” Jay rolls his eyes and begins to skate backwards slowly. “w..woah there What are you doing!? What if you bumb into someone! And then boom I fall have an accident and crack my head open and blee-“shh..clam down love im a pro.. I know exactly what im doing now watch and learn newbie”
Jay effortlessly glides backwards, occasionally whirling the two of you in a circle, abruptly changing from fast to slow and slow to fast. It made you a little disoriented, but it was entertaining. Soon, your freinds took notice.
“ I never thought I would see jay and y/n that close to eacother with out any violence involved” jungwon said with a smile “same.. when i look at them now it's kinda cute don't you think ?” Yujin seems complexly clueless of Sunghoon's crush on you: “uh.. nahh, I don't see it”Jake rushes in and shuts off that particular issue, mindful of Sunghoon's facial expression. Jake quickly skates towards the two of you and splits you up.
“Hey guysss y/n I wanna show u somthing come” Jake takes your hands, replacing Jay's warm ones with his chilly ones and yanking you away from him. You felt empty again, and you weren't sure why.
After approximately an hour of ceaseless skating, the others left for ice cream, but you, Jay, and Sunghoon decided to go to study. It felt odd walking back to campus; you could sense the tension, as if you knew something had happened and wanted to know more.
Before u had the chance to bring it up Sunghoon departed calming “something came up” leaving you and Jay alone. It was silent but a comfortable silence you kept talking glances at Jay really only because he kept talking glances at you he seemed he wanted to say somthimg so you gave him the green light
“I know u have something to say don’t be a pussy” Jay chocked on air at the sudden directness “well.. if you say so then please just here here me out when I say this but I really need something form you it’s kinda last minute but your the only option I have” You nodd urging him to talk “my mom is hosting one of her business events but during it she wants to set me up with a daughter of one of her brand partners but shes..she’s I can’t stand her really and..I was wondering-hoping actually if you can step in just for tonight as my temporary date so my mom doesn’t set me with her…??” Jay closes his eyes expecting the worst yet you say nothing he opens your eyes to observe you
Your countenance gradually changes, and you burst out laughing, “Jay, I never took you for the funny type, oh my..” Jay doesn't find any of this funny and frowns “I'm being serious y/n” you glance at him and your face slowly lowers as you realise he is genuinely serious “ well first of all, I don't wanna be dragged into y'all's rich people drama before they assassinate me in my sleep or some shit” Jay throws his hands in the air “no!..no this is real life not some tv show bs your overthinking this nothing bad is going to happen its just one night stop being dramatic!”
“I am not finished. Second, you don't really like me, and I don't really like you, so it makes no sense that we act like a couple. Third, I'm sure someone else would be better for this... you're not all that dumb, so no way I'm a contender.” Jay sighs, recognising that convincing you will be more difficult than he expected. He lays his hands on both shoulders and shoots you with an expression of great desperation.
“I can't ask anyone else; it's this night, and I'm running out of time. You're the only person I think can handle or tolerate my mother. I really need this, please. I'll do everything, give you anything, just do me this one favour.” You place your finger on your chin and tap it, trying to prolong this moment enjoying every second of jays expression. You glance into his yearning stare. “Hmm, I don't know..” Jay holds your shoulder more tightly than previously. “Please y/n you owe me I've helped you 2 times now this is the least you can do for me” you let out a sigh giving in “sure give me 50k” Jay opens his mouth in surprise at the outrageous quantity.
“Oh that’s not..” you sigh “you said anything this classifies as anything your rich aren’t you? You’re basically a walking bank! this should be nothinggg” Jay sighs “fine..but only after you have gone I’ll send it to you understood” you nod “if this is what its like to have a sugar daddy..then I’ll gladly come to every event can you imagine? 50k per event I might as well drop out of uni and start travelling the world” Jay chuckles at your imagination he found you amusing.
“I think I'm a bit young to be a sugar daddy plus I would never willingly wanna spoil a brat like you someone like you needs discipline” your smile dimes kissing your teeth you pinch his arm earning a groan
“What makes you think I want you to be my sugar daddy!? I'm not a brat, and I don't deserve to be disciplined at all, especially by someone like you. Take your own advice.” Jay hums, “You want to discipline me? Didn’t know you were into that” He smirked, leading you to glance away. “Why are you saying it that way!..You're so weird Jay, this is why you don't get any girls because you're a fucking creep.” He laughs, wiping an imaginary tear from his eye.
“yet your going to a fancy event with this creep tonight aren’t you?”
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Another thing you didn't expect was Jay to be in your dorm room, just you and him. Jay had bursted in pushing some bags into your chest.
“What's this?” He rolls his eyes. “Are you blind?” It's obviously shopping bags full of clothes and shoes. Use your common sense...anyway, I chose this outfit out for you, so go and wear it; the party is in an hour.” You grumble in irritation, going to the bathroom to change.
You would have preferred that instead of parting ways after the conversation, he had informed you of the timing so you could have begun working on your hair and makeup instead of turning up to close to the time where you were in your lounge wear
After getting ready, you come out and present yourself to Jay. It was a long wine-colored green dress shoulder less showing your collarbone. The sleeves ended at your wrist, slightly flared. It embraced your curves, trailing down to the floor and encompassing your body--in a wonderful manner. Jay matched it with gold earrings that flowed down, a simple necklace with a diamond in the centre, and low heels. Jay hummed in fulfilment, looking down at you from top to bottom.
“How do I look?” Jay nods, “You look good, so good I'll turn straight for you.” You smile and laugh at his comment. It seemed he did have a sense of humour. You excuse yourself shortly rushing to do your hair and makeup while Jay is getting ready in your room. Shortly after, you emerge, stunned to discover his finished look.
He was dressed in an all-black suit with a black turtleneck, which wonderfully highlighted his features, particularly his jawline. You didn't want to acknowledge it, but he looked great. You subconsciously ogled at him, and Jay smiled proudly. “You like what you see love?” You shake your head, “Meh, it's fine I guess.” Jay grins to himself at how quickly you denied, as if your mouth didn't water at the sight of him. “Well then let's get going wouldn't want to be late now would we”
Soon you arrive. Jay comes out and opens your door, assisting you out of the vehicle and locking it behind him. He rests his hand on your waist, but he soon removes it. You turn to him “Can I put my hands there? Are you okay with that?” You nod gently, reassuring him. He places his hand back there, confirming to you the warmth you didn't realise you were missing. It made you feel at ease.
You both walk in while Jay greets all these people you don't recognise. To say you felt out of place is an understatement; you were dressed appropriately, but you didn't feel the part. Soon, a woman appeared, and from her appearance, you could tell she was Jay's "scary" mother, his words not yours.
“Hello, my lovely boy. Oh! And who could this be? Jay smiles and pulls you closer, “This is my date y/n.. and y/n this is my mother.” You bow and smile at her. “hello it's lovely to meet you Mrs park” His mother looks you over, looking for flaws to criticise you for. She stiffly smiles, but you know it's not genuine. “Hello there dear.. it's a pleasure to meet you. What do your parents do hmm?” You gulp.
Clearly, you and Jay did not think this through; you had not prepared anything, so you simply stated the truth. “My father was a senior clinical psychologist and my mother is a paralegal” she hums as she takes a sip of her drink. “So your parents aren't doing so well,” “ah.. what a same” you wrinkle a brow, “pardon? What do you mean by that, Mrs. Park,” she shrugs.
“A psychologist? Might as well have been a doctor, far more money, and a paralegal, was it not enough to not just be a lawyer, maybe she failed law school? I guess.. everyone has to find a means to get by."
Your rage must have been obvious. Jay gently squeezed your waist, rubbing it slightly. You couldn't tell if it was to calm you down or a warning not to overreact, but you moved on impulse. No one would speak about your parents, especially your father, who had passed away.
“Listen here..Mrs Park. I do not appreciate your comments regarding my parents' employment. As you seem to be unaware about, a psychologist is a very wonderful vocation. My father was the head of his own business and owned it; he worked in private health care. He earned a lot of money, more than enough to fucking survive…” you took a deep breath to gain composure “Oh! and for your information, I'm also studying psychology so that when I'm older, I can be as successful as my father-and just because my mother isn't in the spotlight of a law profession doesn't mean her work is any less important; she does all of the behind-the-scenes paperwork without the help of others like her , lawyers would have nothing to present in court. I’m sure you didn’t know that since your mindset is clearly limited”
Mrs park gasps and opens her mouth to inject but you cut her off “My mother makes a lot of money; she's not a billionaire, but she lives nicely and has raised me and my brothers comfortably, so do your research before you start talking down on jobs.” You handed Jay your drink and turned away to leave.
Jay's mother was taken aback because no one had ever spoken to her like that before. She was silent; you chewed and spat her out. As yunijin would say “you ate that girl” Jay was fairly pleased of how you stood up for yourself in the face of disagreements. One thing he liked about you was that no matter who it were, you held firm for what you believed in and never gave in to anyone else. “That insolent, arrogant brat! How could she!?” Jay turned to his mother. “She may be a brat at times, but she is not arrogant in general please stop from talking about my date in any unfavourable way, mother…” Jay quickly turned to walk after you.
You sigh as you step out onto a random balcony, embracing the chill. You lean on the edge, looking over the neighbourhood and gazing at the stars.
“The sky is beautiful isn't it?” You humm your eyes, not leaving what is in front of you. “Are you trying to flirt with me right now?” He rolls his eyes “maybe.. is it working love?” you smirk “if anything im turned off repulsed even disgusted it- “alright no need to over do it like I'm some creature who lacks in every ability to charm a woman” you look him in the eye “maybe you are? But one things for sure you certainly did not charm ms back there park. Neither your mother but that’s not the focus”
Jay's smile shrivels under the implications of your words, and he moves closer to you. “Listen.. my mother, like I said, she's scary, and it's hard to voice my opinions against her.” You cross your arms. “I get that, but she basically humiliated and billeted my parents. I know we're not close, but even if you said something or tried to stop her, I'd have appreciated feeling like im not on my own back there...you know? But I think I anticipated too much from you.”
Jay sighed. “What do you mean by that, and what are you trying to say? Trust me, I wanted to say something but couldn't bring myself to…” “ I'm sorry, I really wish I said something. I didn't like how she talked to you either, and I want to take accountability for that because she's my mother. I feel partly responsible, especially since I brought you here; it's my fault. I'm so sorry, y/n, and I completely understand if you just want to leave, you can I won't force you to stay.”
You turn and move approach him. You had no idea what possessed you to do such a thing, but before you realised it, you had placed a palm on his cheek, cupping it. “Honestly, everything is fine. I get where you're coming from. I don't know about your relationship with your mother, but if it's as difficult as you claim, I'll go with it. It's fine; I handled everything on my own rather well, didn't I?” You smile to yourself with pride. “I’m an independent woman after all”
Jay returned the same look, and if it hadn't been so dark, you would have noticed how bright his cheeks were at the contact of your cold hands “I like my women independent” he winked at you, causing you to quickly retreat your hand back using it to hit his chest “s..stop it” Jay smiles “would you believe me if I told you I stayed silent because I knew you were going to jump in so there was no need..haha” you flick him in the arm, making him yelp “don't make me change my mind park” jay quickly shook his head “just a jokey joke..” You smile as you move towards the door, “No worries then let's continue what we started”
The rest of the night went nicely; Jay's mother scowled at you the entire time, but never said anything, which you appreciated, and the meal was as good as you expected. “So this is what you affluent people do when you're bored?” he shrugs. “I suppose so.. I have these all the time” “How do you have time to prepare for midterms? Especially if it's 11 p.m. and no one appears ready to go home” you raise a brow awaiting his reaction “well... I make it work and quit interviewing me” you frown
“I am not interviewing you. I am only asking some inquiries. Can't a girl be curious?” he rolled his eyes, “you seem too curious for someone who doesn't like me”
“Well maybe I don't like you a little less than before” Jay raises an eyebrow, querying how you worded your sentence “Clearly, you visit the library, but not enough. Your sentence is grammatically incorrect nevertheless, I know how to decode the drivel you spew, therefore I understand you.” As usual, Jay had to find a way to irritate you. “If you understand me, you could have just said thank you and called it a night.” Jay laughs, looking at his watch.
“Like you said it's getting late we have class tommrow come on let's go I'll drive you home” you nod “loving the jays girlfriend experience it's a shame you have such as attitude for that I'll rate it a 7/10” Jay stands up with his hand against your back, guiding you through the crowd. “A 7/10? Come on, I treated you well tonight; I even gave you this lovely outfit and shoes, and I- “woah, woah, cool down, I was just kidding.. you've been so sweet to me today I’ve basically fallen in love with you at this point” you smile.
“Your in love with me?” You hum “I said basically doesn’t mean I actually am don’t get my words twisted I know how badly you want me and all..” you wait for his response yet all he does is stare at you with a look. A particular look you recognise, the look he gave you before he kissed you that day. Was he going to do it again? You secretly hoped he would.
“Y/n actually I- Jay! Is that you my favourite nephew I’ve been looking everywhere for you!”
Dispite the interruption Jay isn't sure what hit him, but he wanted to make you smile like that again and again, and he yearned for another time when he could be alone with you and do whatever he wanted.
౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹
From that day onwards You and Jay were near each other more from the start. You studied together, spent your spare time together, and even greeted each other in the hallway. While you still had some arguments and words flung back and forth, they were less frequent and less sour and bitter.
“Jay Jay Jay jaayyyyyyy” he hummed as you poked his cheek. He felt the sharp agony of your acrylics scraping his cheque, but not wanting to upset you, he took the pain silently, allowing you to do whatever you pleased. “I've been thinking we should go out,” he shoots his head up. “G..go out really ?” You agree, “Yeah, there's this cool bowling place that opened about 15 minutes away from campus; we should go together.” Jays smile dropped as glad as he was to go with you, he was hoping it was to “go out with you,” if you catch the drift
But Jay was happy that you were happy and that’s what matters now. Your closeness to eacother was somthing Your friends soon all picked up on yet no one questioned it too much because they were relieved that everyone in the group was now on good terms.
But was that really the case?
What was supposed to be a relaxed atmosphere transformed into an uneasy, uncomfortable quiet. Jay Jake Sunghoon and Jungwon are present, but despite the normal cheerful environment, today no one speaks.
“So.. what's up guys..” Jake sought to break the silence but received no response. He sighs and sinks into the chair, succumbing to defeat. “Actually Jake..” Sunghoon answers “I wanna know what's up too” he speaks addressing Jake, but his eyes are straight on Jays, and Jay understands precisely what he is talking about.
“If you have somthing to say just be straight with me Sunghoon” he clicks his tongue againt his check growing agitated “what I can’t seem to understand.. is how you wanted me to stay away from her so bad because she’s a “bad person” yet all of a sudden your associating yourself with you even hanging out with her privately which you never did before..”
“Honestly I wish I could give you a straight answer for that.. but I can't really explain how I feel and I'm sorry for how I acted back then towards you about it I shoukd have just been true with my intentions” he said “then what are your intentions” Jay gulped, little nervous beneath his gaze, “I like her too, Sunghoon, and I think I always have..maybe ”
The room fell silent as Sunghoon's eyes ramined on Jay's eyes, twitching fingernails digging into his skin as his skin redness became sore. “I feel like such a fool.. my best friend has been lying to me all this time I knew it that day with the smell it was y/n's I smelled the same when I invited her to ice skate with me.. you've been lying under my nose this whole time kissing her doing god knows what with he for all I know! when I expressed my fucking interest in her!” Jay felt terribly awful for how it all played out. He wished things had been different, he wished he had never liked you or that sunghoon had never liked you in the first place, but it was too late.
“Sunghoon, I-“save it” he stood up, grabbing his bag departing. Jay gazed down with regret. Jake sighed and hurriedly stood up to follow, while Jungwon remained behind to check on Jay.
Straight after class you proceed to the lounge and in the corner you find Jay and Jungown. You approach them ready to say high until you catch on to the vibes. As you gaze at their looks bewildered, you pry
“Guys? Is everything alright?” They both glance at you silently. Jay says nothing at first but mutters a brief “I'll talk to you later” as he collects his things and leaves. Jungwon tags along, giving you an apologetic look as he departs, leaving you perplexed and alone to ponder your feelings.
Jay has distanced himself since that day. Perhaps you would have preferred not to see his face back then, but the you now dreaded it. He became part of your routine, something you looked forward to, and now it's as if it never happened. You waved at him in the canteen one day, he looked away, (ouch) the next you asked him a question, he got up and left, the other at the store he made eye contact with you and went into another section , you called, he declined, you texted, he was online but left you on delivered.
It's almost pathetic how badly you wanted to talk to him despite the fact that he ignored you every time, but you didn't want to give up; you had some hope that he'd ultimately talk to you, but he didn't.
Yujin was becoming concerned about your state; you stopped hanging out with the others at lunch, you didn't respond to the group chat despite being the most active, you stayed in your dorm most of the time and stopped going out with everyone, and when you did, you looked tired and drained this wasn't like you at all.
“What could I have done wrong yujin.. I don’t understand we were so fine like 2 weeks ago then boom ghosted” yujin sighed as she pattered your back in attempts to comfort you she truely didn’t understand either “I really don’t know.. it seems you guys were fine from what I saw maybe it’s a him issue”
౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹
Now it's the 15th, the day you dreaded. You had no idea how you would deal with Jay, or if he would even show up, because he now appears to despise you. You felt your stomach churn, which was a restless sensation. Taking the deepest breath your body could bear, you opened the door to see Jay sitting with some papers and reading them. You silently step in, locking the door behind you and sitting a few seats away while bringing out your paperwork.
Silence. As you expected
But impulsively it felt like the one chance you had to receive answers and closure because there were no excuses for him to run away and ignore you. “Jay” he hummed, not looking up, “why are you ignoring me? Have I done something wrong?” Jay doesn't say anything for a moment but eventually says “no”
“Why am I getting silent treatment then? And look at me when I'm talking to you.” Jay sighs softly, looking up to meet your gaze, and immediately lowers in sorrow as he sees your expression. “I've been wondering for weeks what I must have done to irritate you.. but I can't put my finger on it. We were getting there, Jay and we were getting along..then you just cut me off out of nowhere. What was the point if you were just going to do this? You might as well have just let me live my life, but no you made things complicated.”
“I..I'm sorry” you scoff in incredulity. He's not sorry; if he was, he wouldn't have done this to you in the first place if he cared enough. “ If you were sorry, you would not treat me this way, or... is this the goal to make me like you so you can then mess with my emotions!? and make me feel like shit since you despise me so much? If so well done actor of the fucking year.. you fooled me for sure.” You shake your head standing up, Jay replicates your movement, reaching out quickly seizing your wrist.
“Hey... no, no, it's not like that at all! Please hear me out. I didn't want to handle things this way” you sharply, remove your hands from his grip. The warmth he once gave you feeling disgusting It's as if a switch went off in your head, erasing any developing feelings and replaced them with what you once knew.
“What? Want to mislead me again with your lies and restart the cycle? Cut it out, Jay, you've won! Are you pleased with your achievements? Are you satisfied? And to think I thought we could someday... well, it doesn't matter anymore, does it? I don't want anything to do with you, Jay.” Jay was frustrated and scared, and he didn't know what to do. He attempted to convince you, but you refused to listen.
You turn to leave, ignoring his pleads. “Jay, if you know what's good for you, stay away from me right now. You've been doing so well lately, I'm sure it won't be a problem for you. Keep up the good work goodbye Jay,” you turn away, slamming the door behind you, leaving Jay to linger in remorse.
In frustration, he smashed his fists against the table, turning red. He was extremely angry. Angry at himself for being so dumb and small-minded; if he had just been honest with you, maybe things would have been different. Jay wasn't sure what to call it, but it felt like heartbreak more than anything. A wave of anguish overtook him, robbing him of appetite. He felt intense pain in his midsection, like if a shard had sliced through his gut. It felt like death, like despair, choking his body's breath and shutting down his brain effecting his ability to think.
With each passing day, you take another step away from him leaving him in the dark as he once did to you , roles now reversed he feels the same pain you did. despite his constant request and pleas that you show some signs. Your eyes show him distrust, and an averted stare.
“She's leaving today she didn't even say goodbye” Jake frowns and looks down as Jay strides into the room, reading a brow. “Who's leaving?” Jake and Yujin froze. “Uh.. no body jay it's nothing” he crosses his arms “tell me” Yujin keeps her mouth shut to keep her world safe, whereas Jake blabbers your secret under even the slightest pressure.
“Y/n! She is travelling for Canada today- her flight is at 8:45” Jake hurriedly covers his lips while Yunjin slaps him harshly on the shoulder “your so... useless,” she sighs in annoyance now looks at Jay "if your thinking of going don't bother there is no way you will make it in an hour she will be gone and wants nothing to do with..”
Yunjin halts in her sentence in shock as Jay speeds out his room you could practically feel the gust of wind from the speed at which Jay ran to his car. This was his last chance he had to at least try maybe now maybe now you would be willing to talk to him and sourt things out he needed and has been yurning to be in your Presence for so long
You sighed as you waited in queue to board your flight. Was this a hasty decision? Perhaps would it would improve your mental health 100%, especially since it was only for the rest of the academic year you needed this time for yourself. As you go through your playlist, you select a song and discreetly hum along to it, closing your eyes and immersing yourself in the music.
“Y/n!”
You were so engrossed in your music that you missed Jay desperately calling out your name as you made your way to the front, scanning your passport and pulling your bags closer to the jet. Jay worried and tried to get closer to you, but the airport was packed with people "y/n!" He called for you again.
But it was too late your figure was gone.
You wonder occasionally if you and Jay were actually incompatible , and how two wrongs may function together so strangely. Was your perfect harmony a lie?. Was it only temporary, or was it even there at all?-Or simply a thought you deluded yourself into thinking since you craving his attention so much.
You guess you will never know and neither will he.
౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ ౨ৎ
ᝰ.ᐟ - note : after being gone for moths I’ve finnaly had the motivation to writeeee. This has taken me days hopefully you enjoyed and thank you for reading ૮₍ ˶•⤙•˶ ₎ა
@SOOTREEPEAR
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willowser · 1 year
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okay but imagine one day the little one goes up to his daddy and tells him you introduced a guy to him and how much he doesn’t like this man. It doesn’t even have to be a romantic partner it could just be an old friend but lil one and ex!husband bakugou instantly assume you have a new man in your life
omg. the heart attack bakugou is having.
your son is standing on his little step-stool in front of katsuki's bathroom mirror. meant to be brushing his little teeth, but he's mostly chewing on his toothbrush, poking around in his dad's cologne and aftershave and deodorant. at least he's put his pj's on by himself.
katsuki is finishing up his own shower, glancing at him every now and then as he washes the shampoo from his own hair, and when he's finally done, the little boy hasn't gotten any closer to having clean teeth; now he's drawing mindless little shapes through the steam that's built up on the glass.
"oi," he only has to say it once and then your son is letting out a little sigh before brushing the way he's meant to — even if katsuki knows the there's not a lick of toothpaste on that thing.
"dad," he says suddenly, distracted as he turns around to face him. "mommy doesn't let me take a shower."
katsuki moved on from bath time rather quick. in the very beginning, it was fine, because he washed his squirmy son and then wrapped him up in a towel and that was it, but in the last year or so it's turned into "how many toys can i bring with me this time, dad?" and then sitting in the water until it's run cold. it's much easier to get him in the shower at the same time, to shampoo his head and scrub his little butt and then kick him out.
"oh, yeah?" he murmurs, adjusting the towel on his waist. "s'cause mom's better at baths than me."
the little boy only shrugs, before continuing. he's in a small phase right now of 'dad? hey dad? um, dad?' every time he's got something to say, and katsuki finds it both cute and a little exhausting.
"hey dad?"
katsuki hums.
"mommy had a man in her shower."
the first image that comes to mind is of himself, in your shower; the many times you'd taken one together and hugged him beneath the warm water; how it clung to your eyelashes and sat in your cupid's bow. warm, made soft and tender in the steam, like he could mold you against his body forever.
— and then his stomach is swooping so hard, he thinks he might be sick.
"what?" katsuki asks, voice loud and affronted, snatching all his son's attention. "sorry, 'm sorry," and then because his son is still looking at him with wide eyes, he pulls him up close, rubbing his back once before setting him to stand on the counter — which he never gets to do.
guilt twists in his stomach for yelling, though his son seems unbothered now, at new heights. katsuki grabs him by his little tiny shoulders and tries to keep his face smooth and calm, his pending heartbreak hidden.
"who was in mom's shower?"
but your son is smarter than that, can read katsuki like an open book, somehow. as if you passed all your understanding down through the womb; he came out of there knowing exactly what dad was thinking with a single look.
your son only shrugs, averting his eyes to katsuki's shoulder as he lightly pinches his wet skin.
"'m sorry," he says again, shaking his little body around until the boy is laughing. "i'm not mad. i just..." katsuki sighs and tries not to pout. "wasn't expecting that."
"are you mad at mommy?"
the divorce isn't new, and katsuki's not stupid.
you've been on a handful of dates, been open about it, encouraged him to do the same. not that he's bothered, but anyone with eyes and half a brain would try to swoop in on someone like you, so — as much as it makes him want to knock some fucking teeth in — can't say he should be surprised.
he shouldn't be, at all.
still feels like shit, though.
"no," he finally says, tugging the little toothbrush from his tiny fist to put some actual toothpaste on it. "'m not mad at anybody."
"are you sad?"
maybe it's another purposeful distraction, to get out of doing what he's told, or maybe he's probing at nerves because he's too young and too curious, or maybe he just knows his dad too well.
katsuki frowns at his big eyes, staring back at him, before lightly patting his little hip. "brush your teeth, i ain't tellin' you again."
he tries not to think about it, but that just makes it worse. can't stop imagining you in the arms of some other asshole, what stupid shit they must be doing to flirt with you, how they're making you laugh; just the image of it alone — you, besides some fucking bozo, head thrown back the way you do, laughing louder than you ever did with him — makes his stomach hurt.
it makes him dread the hand-off, too. his house is gonna feel too quiet now, after a week with the little brat, and that's a big enough wound to leave him with nothing to say — but you always try to insist on katsuki finding someone every time you get back out there.
it makes him physically ill, just watching the side of your face as you buckle your son into his car seat, all grins because your house gets to be lively with him.
and when you close the door and turn to him and mutter out your little, "hey, by the way....", he has half a mind to just walk away, right then.
"your son," you start off, lightly punching him in the shoulder. "got into the dryer sheets last week and flushed a whole bunch of them down the toilet."
oh.
"oh," katsuki says, and then he narrows his eyes at his son through the window, even though he's not paying any attention.
(on the nights when the little boy can't sleep, is more emotional than usual, katsuki calls you because that's what your son really wants.)
(very relatable feeling, katsuki thinks.)
"yeah," you smile, "and my coworker's husband is a plumber, so i was able to get it all taken care of. just...thought i would let you know."
katsuki shrugs like he could care less, but you see right through it all, of course. the both of you, mother and son, too understanding for his own good.
almost like you were made for him, like you're supposed to still be his.
"yeah, good," he nods once, glancing over your shoulder to see your son finally sitting up a little bit, peering through the window with his big, sad eyes.
just watching the two of you. just knowing.
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