#I'm so willing to believe that when the time comes my faith will be rewarded

[mean-vampyre]

riverdale making jarchie longcon canon whilst being the last big teen show by the cw before it started dying and went bankrupt, would feel soooo celestial mystical karmic. the gay plot twist that was prophesized since the beginning of fandom, where so many other giants have failed and queerbaited, riverdale could stan victorious and proud by pulling the longest and bravest con. jarchie truthers stand strong

[spainkitty]

DAO has really helped me be more inspired to do creative stuff. I'm actually really disappointed by the idea that later games don't have the Origin stories! But since I'm here, I just really wanna brag about my girls.

Aleandria Cousland is my main storyline. I finished her story all the way through Witch Hunt (though I haven't done the GoA yet). She's a baby, just 19 when her world falls apart, and full of optimism and faith and love. She grew up with a silver spoon and she knows it, so she tries, with every choice and judgement she has to make, to pay that privilege forward. She is the epitome of Lawful Good, with just a little bit of veering off the path of annoying righteousness thanks to her grey-moralled biffies. She and Alistair fall in stupid goofy love, obviously, and he trains her to use Templar abilities (she becomes better at it than him🤣). In the end, she becomes Queen of Ferelden alongside her devoted King. She chooses to ally with the Architect, and, while she doesn't quite regret it, she is uneasy with her choice for the next decade. (Then, Witch Hunt made me sob because she spent all that time and effort just to find her friend, to tell her she trusts her and loves her, and Morrigan doesn't have to do this alone! But Morrigan leaves anyway and I fell down sobbing at Morrigan's last look over her shoulder. Spending the time to get up Morrigan's approval as high as possible in DAO was so so worth it for the scenes with Morrigan calling Aleandria her friend and sounding like she was about to cry)

Lanil Surana is my elf mage and she is also Babey. She's aroace spec and her story is unfinished. Thus far: She's been in the Circle so long she doesn't remember anything else, and honestly doesn't care. Why do people keep asking about her elf heritage?? It means nothing to her. She's a mage. She's not exactly smart, but she's bright and strong-willed and confident to the point of arrogance. She is talented at magic, very rarely struggles, and all she cares about is more magic. And (what leads her into trouble) wanting her friends to be happy. Jowan wants to be a farmer and get married and give up his magic? Gross, but okay. She'll help if it'll make him happy. Ofc he's not a blood mage, he wouldn't lie to HER. She knows her friend, there's no way he could hide something like that--oh. oh no. She's still unsure of how she feels about being a Warden; a part of her remains in the Circle, where she feels like she will always belong, even if it meant being made Tranquil for what she truly believes is her own mistake. Going out into the world, seeing something bigger than herself, will hopefully help her learn empathy and perspective. There is more to the world than the Circle, and not all apostates are evil or deserve punishment. Morrigan especially is a good influence on her. Going back to the Circle to save it was the most heartwrenching and terrifying experience of her life and she struggles between her trauma and her growth when it comes to blood magic and freedom. (Extra: everything with Cullen still lingers in the back of her mind. WtFUCK was that?? What was he... talking about? Did he love her or something? No way. Maybe?) In the future, maybe she'll even find a connection to a heritage she's never bothered to care about.

Danae Tabris is a city elf. And she's ANGRY. Her whole life has been about being made smaller, quieter, and scraping by for survival. She is pragmatic and cold to strangers (esp humans), but not unnecessarily cruel. When the Arl's son ruins her wedding day, a day she only half-begrudgingly accepted for her single father's sake, despite having zero interest in her would-be-husband (or any man), Danae's anger is unstoppable. Saving the young elf women around her, protecting them from the monsters masked in human skin, gives her, for a moment, power. True Power over her fate that leads to beheading the Arl's son while still dressed in her wedding finery. Being killed for it feels more like a reward than a punishment, there is true pride in her when she steps forward, it was worth it to save the other elves and end the life of even one oppressor. But then Duncan offers her a life in the Grey Wardens. While she can't truly trust him, she latches onto the idea of more power, the ability to be stronger, faster, and FREE. That freedom and power is all that matters to her, at first. Could Leliana be the one that shows her that she can forgive the world for letting her down? And that humans can, in the end, be good and true and... worth loving? She can not only save a few young elves, she can save the entire country and love wholeheartedly, unreservedly. She will be capable of wielding power, yes, but also capable of Greatness. (Though, she'll never be comfortable with the idea of being a "Hero" and definitely disappears so people will please forget her face.)

[mahamid110]

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[mcbex]

*TRUST*

Tell me something you know about trust. Tell me something you know about faith. Tell me about a time when trust and faith were all you had. Lord knows I need these examples.

Is this the life he intended for me? I reach into my heart to find conviction. I don't know what is missing for me to trust his timing. There are so many things I'm waiting for. I watch as I see loved ones go through times that are exciting, or difficult. I watch their transformation excitedly cheering them on and wonder what his plans are for me. Why do I wait for answers when other people actively seek it out. What is my next move?

You see trusting in God with all your heart through the highs and lows is actually quite difficult IF we reach for the kind of conviction it takes to completely trust. I find I have limits outline with barbed wire on my trust. However I need to give faith that is of real undeniable expectation that God is who he says he is, no electric fences included. I need the kind of trust that if it were ever broken I may never fully recover. I reach to my toes for this kind faith but I've been hurt so many times.

Trust. It's such a small word but it means so much. It's the difference between believing what I'm told and taking the time to research. It keeps me from riding anything at a carnival. It could be the difference in having surgery I might need or in telling someone I love them for the first time. Maybe it's even in my belief of what I can do, if I stop trusting that I'll fail. It's so small and intimate and honestly kind of consuming. It's also fragile. I have found my trust broken again and again by some, where others have never been able to earn it. The simplest thing can build or break it. So why do I struggle to risk all of my trust for the one who has promised me everything and given his life in place of mine? The risk involved in loving Christ only brings great reward. I want trust like that.

I'll never understand why hurting or longing can be such a tool for us to grow. I wish I could just solve my troubles with cerebral answers. Why do I have to take each step individually? Selfishly, it's frustrating when I think it's the Lord speaking into my life but the lesson is really for another. Why put us through that? I want to be a tool but on my terms I guess. What a selfish view of salvation.

I've been praying for my husband to find faith, to find conviction, to find Christ. I've been so frustrated and a little overwhelmed with it. I feel like someone like me ends up with a person yoked in the same way. I ache both for my hoggishness and that it seems like he may never find the joy I know in Christ.

Trust first and foremost is not selfish. I think it pulls us in and asks us to speak in a whisper. It says come close and be gentle with me. It says even if it hurts, I have you. Where is my belief like that? Not everything that happens is because God willed it but it is all God used. I trust that is a good compass for finding my way. Until then I must be patient.

Psalm 37:5 Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust him, and he will help you.

Isaiah 40:28-31 Have you never heard? Have you never understood?The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of all the earth. He never grows weak or weary. No one can measure the depths of his understanding. He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion.But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.

[electricbluebutterflies]

Hi!! Saw that promp list you reblogged, so I'm shooting my shot for Nina + Matthias with this one: 'Learning what the other person likes sexually' thank you 😊

(Also...idk if you'd accept 1 or 2 more requests for this otp? Loved the prompts but I dont wanna spam your inbox. 😜)

I kinda love them... obvious smut ahead and also on ao3.

She’s broken him. He’s not sure how much he minds.

Look, objectively the fact that he is stuck in the frozen middle of nowhere and owes his continued survival to a witch who will not shut up and seduced him more out of boredom than anything that seems like actual desire on her part is… almost all of his worst nightmares come true. But all of that established and ignored, Nina is not the worst possible person to be stuck with. She’s beautiful, occasionally funny in a way that breaks the cultural barriers between them, knows what she wants…

They’ve stopped for the night, no closer to civilization than they were when they woke up but not going around in circles yet – and he’s left subtle markings at each fishing hut they’ve temporarily occupied, he would know – and he knows what happens next, and this time he wants to do better.

Nina is, he has learned over the past few days, a very particular combination of insatiable and bossy. When she decides she wants, and apparently physical activities are how she deals with her everything, she makes herself very clear and pins him to whatever passes for a bed wherever they are. (Or, very briefly yesterday, a wall.) And while Matthias is a willing enough participant in his own corruption, he can’t push away the feeling that the power dynamic is the truly wrong thing here. A man is not supposed to be passive, even when faced with… all of that. But as it is, he’s not sure he’ll get the chance to change it up.

And sure enough, after an improvised meal of probably-undercooked fish, she reaches out. Puts her mouth on his and starts taking kisses, and he’s so powerless and so into it and-

“Stop,” he breathes, unsure if the word even comes out.

To his great surprise, she freezes. She’s still clinging to him, but not actively doing anything more. “You okay? Did I do something-“

“You need to rest,” he murmurs, adding a little endearment in his native language. Yep, she’s definitely corrupted him. “If you want, let me give.”

Nina rolls her eyes. “Are you sure?!”

“I need to learn how to do this… properly.”

The look on her face is the most amused horror he’s ever seen and oh he almost loves her for it. “I am not passive. You do realize that, right?”

“You don’t have to be. I don’t know… tell me what to do.”

She takes a step back. “Alright. How detailed instructions do you want?”

“Tell me how to make you happy.”

Nina takes another step back and shifts her body into an open position. “Alright. Undress me. You’ve seen how all of this works…”

He has, and he steps forward and tries. The buttons of her vest are so tiny, and of course she’d done up all of them, and it takes a frighteningly long time for his fingers to get them all undone. Then her shirt, also made challenging with the laces done up too tight and oh the sight of her curves underneath it is distracting and unfair and-

Somehow, he figures out all the knots and gets it off her, gets rewarded with the sight of her soft skin and pointy breasts. Even this would be enough, and he-

“Put your mouth… somewhere.”

If nothing else, Matthias is good at following orders. Even if they are given by a… no, at this point he doesn’t think she’s a witch. Not like he was taught to believe. Definitely not normal, but far more human than he expected.

Not that it matters, he reminds himself as he leans down and tries to kiss her breasts. She’s even paler there than she is elsewhere, and her body is warm and unfair. She squirms a little, but the noises she makes are happy enough and she hasn’t yelled at him so he’s hopefully not screwing this up too badly and-

On instinct, he puts his mouth around one of her nipples and licks, and her noises turn closer to what she apparently sounds like in bliss. He’s still learning how that works, but if this helps get her there…

“Okay, I was just going to have you straight-up fuck me but nevermind you’re actually good with your mouth,” she says, yanking on his hair to pull him up and off. “This still…?”

“Yes. Keep showing me.”

“I’m not showing you, I’m trying to un-repress you,” she laughs. “Undo my skirt and get me on the bed.”

He does, and without being told he knows what she wants next. Well, this may be the strangest experience yet with her, but…

The space between her thighs is beautiful, swollen pink instead of ivory, already shiny with her warmth. He pokes around with his fingers – this, at least, she has let him do before – and makes a plan. If he’s wrong then he’s wrong and he still expects she’ll get mad at him at some point during this, but until then he-

“Head. Down. Now.” From this angle she looks magnificent, and he can see her desperation in a different way. “Keep going unless I grab your ear, no matter what else I do.”

In the recent past, in the time before she happened to him, all of this was foreign to him. It was, and remains, improper for a man of his status to know too much about the sacred beauty of women before marrying one. In that way he is ruined now, and he cannot imagine any of this being so good with some equally innocent creature. This one is so much better. This one is-

She kicks his shoulder, more out of annoyance than wanting to hurt. “I know I’m cute but get on with it.”

He complies, pressing his mouth to her outer petals. He is well aware he has too much scruff right now, and that might hurt where she’s sensitive… no, might hurt some lesser woman, won’t make this one bat an eyelash. Nina is different and Nina is herself. And she is perfect, he thinks as instinct takes over and he starts to lick. Beautiful wet nightmare.

This is a first attempt, not perfection. His desire to make her happy counts for something, he hopes as he tries different things, because that’s about the only part of this in his favor. This act she’s suggested is so new, something he’s surprised she even wants, and to have his world reduced to her womanly parts is… perfect for him, honestly. He is aware of his own body responding to it, but she hasn’t asked for that yet and maybe she won’t tonight and-

As he is learning is normal for her, Nina falls apart with a few breathless noises. Apparently this also includes clenching her thighs tight enough his head hurts and more of her sweet warmth dripping onto his tongue. For a moment he’s not sure he can breathe either, and-

The pressure lessens and instead of grabbing his ear like she said, she pulls him up to her level by the shoulders.

“Did I… please you?”

She rolls over to cover his face in wet kisses. “You need to have more faith in your abilities. That was nice.”

“What… what now?”

“Do you still want to have me?” she asks, putting her hand between his legs.

As if that’s a question. Matthias has been able to ignore his own body until now, but the slightest touch makes him squirm and he’s still fully dressed and she is unfair and-

“Always,” he breathes. Might as well admit it. “Is that alright? You already…”

“Great thing about having the parts I do is I can fall apart multiple times,” she shrugs like that should be too obvious. “I am perfectly fine with it if you are.”

“Please.”

“Good. Undress for me and… I wanna see what you do.”

It no longer feels awkward to feel her eyes on him as he sheds his layers. Her expression is appreciative, and he’s never thought too much about what his body might look like to other people but clearly the only person who matters right now is into it. Years after her, he thinks, if there is an after her, he will always remember this as he looks at his skin. Impossible perfect woman almost making him happy.

And sure enough, as he’d both hoped and feared, his prick is in full form. And to think he’d expected it would hurt her the first time she wanted him. There’s no fear of that now, but a near-inevitability he won’t last long enough to give her what she wants and-

He looks at her, spread out for him and waiting, and he knows whatever he does will be enough.

Soft beautiful his, he repeats as he maneuvers his body over her. Perfect woman, as he lines up his prick. More than he had ever dreamed of, as he covers her.

She feels perfect around him, and he rolls his hips against hers and tries to find a pattern the way she does when she covers him and he is so sure he’s doing it wrong but she keeps taking kisses anyways so maybe not. Perfect, and he feels himself tense up and no too soon he hasn’t given her everything he hasn’t-

He falls apart anyways, best intentions be damned, boneless on top of her even as their bodies separate.

“I didn’t mean to-“

“Do I look like I’m complaining?”

No, he thinks as he maneuvers his body so most of his weight is off of her, no she does not. If anything, Nina looks the happiest he’s seen her, pink and glowing and content. “You look beautiful,” he says before he talks himself out of it.

“Good.” She shakes her head, her hair flying everywhere. “Are you… was all of that okay?”

She gets under his skin like no one else ever has, and he almost loves her for it and he is undone. “I don’t know if I did it right.”

“There is no right. Not with this. There’s only… what I like may be different from what some other person likes, and each time you’re with someone new you get to figure it all out again.”

“That’s not what I-“

“You made me feel good. As long as you felt good too… that’s the important part.”

And he did, he lets himself feel as they maneuver themselves into a comfortable position for sleep. Dangerous woman. He is ruined for anyone else now, and… maybe that’s alright.

[dog-day-morning]

The word of God tells us we shall suffer for the cause of Christ, he who seeks a greater reward must attain a greater faith. Unto whom much is given that much more is required. You wanna eat that whole caramel cake, you crave that sweet tea, you pursue that woman in a nightclub hoping to get her in a compromised position, face down tail up because face it, we're not willing to bow down to the will of God, but we’re so happy, and ready to give in to that round mound of doo doo brown. The 3 Hebrew boys Meshach, Shadrach, and Abednego went into the fiery furnace defying Nebuchadnezzar's declaration to worship him. These men had the inspiration, strength, and courage to say, even if He doesn't deliver us, we know that He can. That kind of faith is called perfected faith. We can be lazy because we refuse to work with what God gave us before the day of calamity comes to devour us. Tribulation is kicking into high gear, and many of God’s people are none the wiser. There are people who were working 3 jobs before, and after this pandemic became a global concern who know what is on the horizon. You don't need an Issachar spirit to discern the times; read the Bible. He also said to the crowds, “When you see a cloud rising in the west, you say at once, ‘A shower is coming.’ And so it happens. And when you see the south wind blowing, you say, ‘There will be scorching heat,’ and it happens. You hypocrites! You know how to interpret the appearance of earth and sky, but why do you not know how to interpret the present time? The gov't has pulled back on unemployment benefits forcing many to find a job. The 2 righteous servants in the parable of the 3 servants increased the wealth of their employer who trusted 3 men with different amounts of talents [money], and the 1 who didn't work diligently for his master inherited weeping, and gnashing of teeth. God invested in us, and He expected a greater return from this major investment. Jesus was the greatest financial venture ever made. The Father placed His faith in His Son who in turn gave Him many more sons that walk amongst us waiting for the Day of Judgment. This investment which supersedes all, but are intertwined will never decrease, and forever increase. The 144,000 isn't a spiritually inspired interpretation based on mine, and Mima getting the Holy Ghost or having an encounter with the Holy Spirit to speak in tongues. Sit down grandma, your Depends are leaking brown stuff that reeks of formaldehyde, and raw chitlins. God is looking for a righteous Nation to worship Him not themselves. These men, and boys who represent the 12 tribes of Israel have never been defiled by women, and hopefully not by men either. You lucky mother You can take the word literally or as a misinterpretation. Those who don't believe in the written word who believe that God's word isn't infallible aren't all to blame for this heresy. Those who originally interpreted the King James Bible added to, and took from are suffering for a misleading interpretation. The prophetic which God didn't let man corrupt altogether has pretty much played out verbatim. We may be dying to a world that is trying to kill our faith that God has no intention of doing until He finds His true worshippers, and He’ll never destroy one's faith in Him. Winter is coming and you and I must be prepared. We must live like today is our last without being caught up in fear. I'm suffering from a form of laziness called jackass. God shall supply all your needs, but faith without works is dead. The ant has the intuition to work throughout the Summer knowing that Winter is coming. A lot of these drones won't live to see the finished product. Ant mounds look like the Pyramids of Giza that secure the Queen, but where is the King? They serve the one who gives life that sustains the colony, she is their goddess, but what happens if the Queen dies? There's more than one Queen serving the colony who can breed an entire colony independent of one other. fulfilling their role while working together in unison with the others who all serve a greater purpose. This

is a major element that drives the Kingdome of heaven. Christ is just like His Father In the Kingdome that includes the Holy Spirit which they will pour upon all flesh again soon. There are no cowards or sinners in the Kingdome. The angels are not as drones, they are blessed warriors.

Revelation 21:8

8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.

1 Corinthians 6:8-10

8 Nay, ye do wrong, and defraud, and that your brethren.

9 Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind,

10 Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.

Alkebulan we need to wake up and get right. Black American's of the tribes of Judah, Gad, Reuben, and Issachar you need to aim at my forehead, and scatter my scatter brained grey matter all over the pavement. When Joe Biden told a radio podcaster if you don't vote for me you're not Black, he must be color blind. This vaccine that suspiciously looks like the Mark of Whodunnit. They can plant a microchip in your arm that can track your every move, financial transaction, and possibly your dreams while you sleep. Some Walmart stores are refusing to take cash when you check out; they only take debit, and credit cards. These are signs that we’re living in the End Times. The Last Days. I'm looking at this as a sign to get the hell outta this city, and decompose. What in God's name am I afraid of? Jesus took a beat down like a man on a mission.. You're not weak or simping if you gave your life for a people you fed, healed, gave sight to, preached to, taught them a new way to live, pray, love, told them about a Kingdome greater than Jerusalem, and you didn't kill anybody in the process knowing what they were going to do to your physical body in an almost retarded like bid to destroy their salvation. I've done none of that; my bad. Stop looking for men, especially zaddy to deliver us. “If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.” Some of us foolheartedly called Bill Clinton the first Black president when he's not, never can, or will be to me in any sense, Barack wasn't either. Thomas Jefferson, the third elected president, who served two terms between 1801 and 1809 was described as the “son of a half-breed Indian squaw (Black) and a Virginia mulatto father (Black).” Abraham Lincoln, the nation’s 16th president, served between 1861, and 1865. Lincoln had very dark skin, and coarse hair and his mother allegedly came from an Ethiopian tribe. His heritage fueled so much controversy that Lincoln was nicknamed “Abraham Africanus the First” by his presidential opponents and cartoons were drawn depicting him as a Negro. Warren Harding, Calvin Coolidge, Dwight David Eisenhower, and the scourge of the South Andrew Jackson were all n**gahs. I’ll see you come Hanukkah you self-hating black, Uncle Ruckus’s. I don't celebrate Thanksgiving, why should I be overjoyed about the genocide, and enslavement of God's people? Christmas is what it is. Hopefully you will celebrate this holiday season together fulfilling God's prophetic word. I can't unless you kill me. The Christmas holiday is as pagan as Joel Osteen is at scamming. David Duke, you might wanna go to ancestry.com, and take a DNA test. You might be 30% Swahili. By the looks of those big, gorilla nostrals you had before that rhinoplasty. You, and Bull Connor may be related to Idi Amin. Your biggest shame is your greatest blessing. Personally you can kiss the skid marks in the middle of my skid marks after I take a fresh dump. Conservative, political pundits, and wannabes whose names I won't mention, but one in particular who looks like he smoked 23 blunts in 15min. with no filter. Please keep him in California, and let him drown with his zaddy, and pancaked tail, bowed hipped women. Use your lips as a floatation device dude. These people are ashamed of the God who has blessed many, and plenty. These people suffer, hopefully not always, from the white savior or white zaddy complex. The truth isn't in any of them, that's why they're so adept at lying when making bold-faced statements before the public that opposes their previous opinion like people don’t have YouTube or google. I’ll Bing a factoid or Yahoo that mother to get the truth I may even pay for it, gimme a dollar. My inability to walk amongst men as a man has stagnated my propensity to live That's BS, my Apostle said something this past Sunday that's stuck on my forehead. YOU'RE LAZY!!! I am what I am, a pain in the rear end. This has gone on way too long. Sometimes

I feel as though God wants me to kill myself because the PO PO won’t. I would feel better if my natural family would stab me in the neck, not my back, with a piece of diseased, pork, spare rib from a boar hog, and let me die from a rare form of trichinosis. The people have spoken while I’m playing Jay, and Silent Bob. Father, get me outta here. Elohim, 9/16/2021

[dolliedarlin]

hello hello hello!

how are you doing? happy wednesday! i told myself i was gonna try to message as much as i can when i’m free so here i am :)

how has school been? are exams done? how did you do? have you been able to keep up with projects/ homework? i’m sure you have, i have so much faith in you and i believe you are always doing things to the best of your ability :)

where i live right now is under a huge snowstorm and they think we may get up to 23 inches of snow. it’s a little scary but they cancelled school and other things so i’m trying to see it as time to work on homework and do some things i haven’t had time to do in a while. i’ve finished all of my homework but one english assignment, but i’m feeling a little burnt out so i’ve decided to call it a night.

the last few days have been kind of interesting lately, especially in the romance department (👀). i have a science class and have caught a cute guy looking at me a few times and i’m curious to see if that shall turn into a friendship. i’ve also been working towards getting over feelings for someone else for the last few months. it is difficult to do when they’re still technically in your life, but you never received closure over what happened. i’m hoping that things are going well for them, and i’ve decided it’s time to move on and be happier myself as well. it was a more difficult decision than i’m willing to admit, but i just want everyone to get the chance to be happy.

i’ve been working towards building up my own confidence and i’ve been working on a journey of self love lately. it has been a lot more difficult than i thought it would be as i had to do a lot of inner work and processing over situations and things. i am a lot happier than i was, but it is still a difficult journey for me to travel on. nonetheless, i will keep pushing to be the best version of me i can be :)

i hope you’ve been doing well lately and i look forward to hearing from you once more.

lots of love,

liv <3

liv, my love! hello again!

you're so sweet, thank you for always messaging me, i always love seeing you in my inbox -^7^-

i've been doing alright, thank you! my exams are over for the previous semester/teaching block, which i believe i did okay on, i'm just glad it's finally over. but now i'm in the new semester and have an additional module on imaging with a portfolio to hand in for. it's daunting but is more fun than i originally thought, despite the extra work. all i need to do is just stay on top of the content so that i don't get overwhelmed when the time comes to hand in my portfolio for it

i can't believe you think so highly of me, that warms my heart, thank you so much! i think the same of you too! you're always so hardworking and kind and considerate and all the good everyone should be made of! i hope only good things come to you <3

good job on seeing the silver lining in things and making the most out of a bad situation, i'm so proud of you for doing so much! well done, dollface! i hope you got a good night's rest after all that hard work -^7^-

oooo~ romance you say?~ i hope that blossoms into something more for you soon, but not too quickly ;) and just in time for valentines day too~ oh la laaa~ ;)))

my god, can you be any more perfect of a person? you're so selfless and kind, i hope you know that all the people who know you are so incredibly blessed to have such a beautiful person in their life. not everything is about finding that special someone but i really hope that you get that fairy tale happy ending bc you're literally a modern day disney princess <333

im so so happy for you, oh my goodness, not everyone is brave enough or has the endurance for such an arduous endeavour but i applaud you for braving it out and taking those steps to take better care of yourself and yourself up to your true potential! it's a hard journey but it's certainly a very rewarding one. you're very inspiring, you're pushing me to take that step myself! lets see what i can do from this burst of inspiration you've given me!

i can't wait to hear back from you too, hopefully things keep looking up for you, dollface!

all my love,

dollie x

[thestupidhelmet]

What would you say are the core personalities of the six? I don't know if you've made a meta about this already since I'm fairly new here. Love your blog!

Thank you! 😊

I’ve written a few metas on the characters’ personalities or characterizations. But I’ll write up what I interpret their consistent core characterizations to be. First, a preamble.

Unfortunately, That ‘70s Show’s writers had a tendency to forget, ignore, or outright change the characters’ core characterizations, too often introducing new elements -- to serve plot -- that conflict with earlier established personality traits confirmed and reconfirmed by many episodes that followed. This is different than character development, which is grounded often in incremental changes over several / many episodes or even seasons. 

Most of these revisions of the characters’ core personalities are negative. Only one I can think of is positive: Hyde’s in “Prom Night” (1x19). The core of his character gets a complete overhaul once his role as Eric’s villainous foil and rival for Donna’s affection is over.

Because of the show’s inconsistent writing, one can pick and choose which consistently depicted attributes are the truly canon parts of a character’s personality. Later in the series, these consistently depicted attributes often conflict. When I write fanfic and @those70scomics​, I depicts the characters according to what I believe are their core personalities. Other people can reasonably view their core personalities differently. 

Now to answer your question.

Fez

He’s insecure about fitting in with his group of friends and among Americans in general. This insecurity sometimes manifests as neediness with friends and girlfriends alike.

He’s loyal to his friends and generally caring. He doesn’t like hurting their feelings. He’s in touch with his emotions and sensitive, which means he can be hurt rather easily by his friends’ or others’ thoughtless remarks toward him -- or hurt by what he misinterprets as an insult (e.g., Hyde telling Fez he needs to act aloof to attract women, and Fez believing Hyde is calling him “a loof,” which Fez apparently thinks is a put-down).

He’s not defenseless, however. He’s got a quick wit and comes back with cutting remarks of his own or simply cuts off his friends with his catchphrase and its varieties (i.e. “Good day. ... I said good day!”)

He’s passionate, but this passion variously paired with his insecurity, neediness, and sensitivity can cloud his judgement, which causes him to go too far in many areas: dirty jokes, masturbation, pursuit of unavailable girls, eating candy, etc. 

He suffers from Nice Guy syndrome with Jackie during seasons 2 and 3. This means he has a sense of entitlement to Jackie’s romantic and sexual affection, and his respectful treatment of her is predicated on the expectation of romantic and sexual reward. Once he realizes that she’ll never reciprocate his romantic feelings, his respectful treatment of her diminishes greatly. 

In season one, he’s depicted as insightful to other people’s feelings and motivations. In seasons 1-4, he’s also depicted as romantic and a romantic. He’s a serial monogamist, but he suffers somewhat from toxic masculinity (e.g., calling Jackie little girl when he believes she’s overstepped her bounds) and sexism (e.g., often calling girls whores; once this insult is prompted by a girl who does not put out sexually, which is the opposite of the meaning of whore). With Rhonda, though, this toxic masculinity and sexism seem not to be evident.

He longs for intimacy, whether platonic (men) or romantic (women). See this meta about how the show writes Fez and Kelso’s relationship as near-romantic in later seasons while also (re)affirming Fez and Kelso’s canonical straightness to keep T7S’s universe a heteronormative one.

Fez is obsessed with losing his virginity, but for the first four seasons of the show, the depiction of this obsession falls in line with that of many teenage boys his age. It’s not out of the ordinary. Eric is shown to have the same obsession until he and Donna finally have sex. Further, Fez’s obsession is not so all-encompassing that he can’t put it aside for love. He does so for his love of Rhonda -- until “Everybody Loves Casey” (4x26), where the best parts of his core characterization are destroyed. See my meta The Deterioration of Fez’s Character for details.

My Take: I prefer to write the insightful, loyal Fez who sometimes doesn’t know how far to push a joke. He can be insecure, but he’s also got a strong moral center and sense of what’s right and wrong -- or develops this sense more thoroughly during a given story. He’s flawed but very capable of growing and changing due to his ability to examine his own behavior and love for his friends.

Kelso

In season one, Kelso is a math and tech prodigy who has little common sense and or will power. He’s also loyal to Eric and Hyde and clearly loves them, but his impulsivity and addiction to sexual pleasure drive him to act thoughtlessly. He displays a sense of entitlement but not a pathological one. He’s capable of apologizing for his thoughtless and entitled behavior.  See this meta about “Ski Trip” (1x13) for an in depth analysis of Kelso’s behavior during that episode.

After season 1, his math and technology knowledge is gonet. His selfishness and sense of entitlement overshadow his loyalty to anyone (or anything) other than fulfilling  his own needs and desires. His lack of common sense becomes cartoonish. He acts maliciously when he feels slighted, which happens when he doesn’t get what he believes he’s entitled to. He relentlessly pesters Jackie verbally and physically for sex when she just wants to sleep. He’s pathologically narcissistic, vain, and dishonest.

During the end of season 3 and beginning of season 4, however, he begins to grow and change. He experiences and express remorse toward Jackie for treating her so badly -- without any expectation of return. His selfishness fades significantly, as does his lying, but neither attribute disappears completely. He’s capable of putting his own wants and desires aside for Jackie’s, but she sometimes has to assert herself more than once for him to do so.

During the end of season 4, unfortunately, he not only reverts back to type, he also becomes worse. He rescinds his remorse and gives Jackie the responsibility for his cheating. He speaks misogynistically about women and her, and is just generally awful. See my metas Jackie Kissing Todd “the Cheese Guy” and Kelso’s Reaction and False Equivalency: Kelso’s “Most Romantic Gesture” Toward Jackie for further analysis.

In season 5, Kelso reaches the peak of his self-entitled narcissism, selfishness, hypocrisy, and possessiveness over Jackie. He interprets Jackie dating Hyde as an act of betrayal and an attack on his pride and self-esteem. He seeks out revenge on both of them, even while trying to “win Jackie back” with the same kind of maliciousness he shows Jackie in season 2 when she doesn’t forgive his cheating within a week of her discovering it. 

Throughout the series, he makes unwanted sexual advances toward Donna. He tries to grope her breast repeatedly while she sleeps. He tries to sneak a glimpse of her breasts while she changes, and she’s so sick of his whining that she gives into what he wants (in “Class Picture” [4x20]). The writers intended this scene to be funny, but it’s actually horrific and parallels Jackie’s complaints about Kelso pawing at her and whining relentlessly for sex that she gives in so she can sleep.

He makes these numerous sexual advances on Donna when she’s in a relationship with Eric and when she and Eric are broken up. Yet he when he and Jackie are no longer together, he acts like Hyde has committed a crime against him for being in a consensual relationship with Jackie.

Without Ashton’s comedic timing and likability, Kelso would be unbearable to watch during seasons 1-5. Kelso is funny only because of Ashton’s performance.

But in season 6, Kelso gets another chance at a true character growth arc. He fights his selfish, cowardly tendencies to have a place in Brooke’s life and their child’s (whom hasn’t been born yet). He works hard to prove his ability to be a good father. and himself worthy of Brooke’s love. Even more, he makes an act of utter unselfishness and sacrifice by letting Brooke and their baby go  -- to live Chicago with Brooke’s mom -- because that’s what’s best for them, not him.

That being said, he still demonstrates an amount of selfishness toward his friends.

Season 7 again drops him back to status quo -- almost. Brooke is gone. He’s barely involved in his child’s life. He dates Hyde’s newfound sister, in part to burn Hyde. But at least he treats Angie with respect and is faithful to her, as far as we’re shown. So that part of his growth from season 6 stuck.

Throughout all the seasons, he’s shown to have a vast imagination. He fancies himself an inventor or an astronaut. He comes up with some wild -- and some might say insane -- ideas. He’s creative despite not being very skilled.

My Take: I generally write Kelso as a selfish, self-entitled narcissist because of when my T7S fics take place in the series. I also use his lack of common sense as comic relief. But I prefer the Kelso capable of growth and change, the one who is willing to put his own needs and desires aside for the benefit of other people. This latter characterization development has continued in @those70scomics​, and I’ve given him major growth arcs in my stories Reflections Through the Glass, Beneath a Shattered Sky, and Those Who Play with Demons (which I have yet to finish writing).

Eric

Eric has a compassionate heart. He cares about his family, his friends, and people in general. But he also suffers deep insecurities about his masculinity thanks to Red’s treatment of him. Eric is more in touch with his emotions, like his mother, and Red has trouble relating to him. Red also worries Eric might be too emotionally vulnerable to survive the real world, which is why he’s so hard on him (see “Hunting” [2x13]).

Because of modeling his dad gives him on masculinity, the clear messages that Eric isn’t masculine enough, and what he absorbs from observing how society expects men to behave, he suffers from bouts of chauvinism. Donna.is regularly the recipient of Eric’s insecurities about his manliness. He often feels threatened by her self-confidence, athletic ability, intelligence, etc. -- because she’s a woman and his best friend / girlfriend / fiancée. He falsely believes her strengths highlight his weaknesses as a man.

But he’s also patient and unselfish with Donna, putting aside his own sexual desires for her need to go slowly or for celibacy (in season 6). He’s supportive of her and all his family and friends, including Laurie and Jackie -- both of whom he has an antagonistic relationship with. He’s very loyal to his friends.

Eric uses sarcasm and his quick wit as defense mechanisms. Some might say he’s a little stunted in his growth due to his continued enjoyment of playing with action figures. He indulges at times in his mom’s infantilizing of him while also trying to assert his adulthood.

He has a specific vision for his future: marrying Donna and having a family with her. This vision, however, does not include a career. He doesn’t seem to be passionate about much else besides his relationship with Donna (and having sex with her) and Star Wars. This is a failing of the writers. Eric’s storylines are so Donna-focused that the show gives little space for what else he might be passionate about.

Eric is very much capable of recognizing, owning, and learning from his mistakes. He can be a total ass, but he eventually realizes his behavior and makes correction.

Donna

Donna is confident, athletic, intelligent, and a staunch defender of gender equality (when written consistently). She’s loyal to her friends. She often puts aside her own pride to protect Eric’s self-esteem. She gets angry at him almost only when he’s earned it. See In Defense of Donna (an essay in eight parts) for an in depth analysis on her relationship with Eric.

When she’s in severe emotional pain, she becomes self-destructive. Losing her relationship to Eric at the end of season 3 and her mom moving to California sends her into downward spiral. Earlier, we see this self-destructive trait in “Eric Gets Suspended” (2x09) when her parents pay little attention to her due to their obsession with the latest fads. 

Her parents’ lack of boundaries with her -- exposing her to their marital troubles and making her a pawn in them, as well as not hiding their sexcapades from her -- create a strong sense of boundaries within her.

The state of her parents’ relationship often influences her confidence in her relationship with Eric. She’s afraid sex will destroy her relationship with Eric; but once her parents renew their wedding vows, she has faith enough that romantic relationships can last that she finally feels safe enough to have sex.

She strongly values her independence. She doesn’t want her life and prospects dictated or limited by her romantic relationship with Eric. She witnesses how her dad’s controlling chauvinism stifles her mom’s own independence and dreams for herself, and she refuses to let Eric’s insecurity and chauvinism do that to her.

She’s passionate about writing, both journalistic and fiction, as well as music. She’s playful and forgiving. She doesn’t fit the gender norms of the 1970s. She’s as comfortable playing basketball with the guys as she is decorating a room or gymnasium for an event. She has a mixture of femininity and masculinity, which only Jackie seems to insult her about.

Jackie

At her core, Jackie is a compassionate, generous, and insightful person. She gives far more gifts to Kelso during their relationship than he does her -- despite her always stating how much she wants presents. She gives Donna lots of advice and support during Donna and Eric’s transition from friends to lovers. She continues to give Donna advice and support throughout the series about her love life.

But Jackie can also be very controlling, insulting, and selfish. She’s quite vain, but she’s also insecure about all she acts secure about. See Does Jackie Become Less Insecure about Her Physical Appearance when She Dates Hyde? If So, Why? 

Jackie has abandonment issues because of her parents. Her father isn’t home a lot and often shows his love for her through presents. The latter is why she wants / expects to get gifts from her boyfriend(s). She develops a marriage obsession out of wanting a guarantee she won’t be abandoned by her romantic partner, despite that marriage doesn’t actually guarantee this.

She also has a tendency toward self-delusion. She so needs Kelso to be whom she wants him to be that she goes into denial about his infidelity and all the negative qualities of his I described above. Eventually that delusion is broken, only to be replaced by delusions about Hyde. She transfers her feelings of (relationship-)safety from Kelso to Hyde.

Only when Kelso breaks her heart for the final time at the end of season 4 does she break out of this delusion cycle. She fantasizes about what her future with Hyde might be like, but that isn’t the same as deluding herself. Plus, Hyde consistently disabuses her of these unrealistic fantasies and offers her a much healthier and happier potential reality.

Once she’s with Hyde in season 5, she begins growing and changing significantly. Instead of complaining of her suffering as she does, for instance, during her S2-S3 break-up with Kelso, she hides the fact her mom has completely abandoned her after her dad goes to prison. She tells no one her mom hasn’t come home from Mexico.

This is not one of the healthier changes she makes in season 5, but fantasizing away her pain no longer works as a defense mechanism. Instead, she believes she has to face her struggles alone. Fortunately, Hyde discovers the truth and gives her a safe place and, in a very real way, becomes a literal safe place for her himself. (The writers screwed this up for the sake of a season-ending cliffhanger, but that’s beyond the scope of this meta.)

Jackie can be stubborn and determined. She wants what’s best for the people she loves, especially Hyde. She’s extremely forgiving. She doesn’t trust her ability to take care of herself, but she learns that she can (through getting a job, Hyde’s encouragement, her public access TV show, etc.)

She’s a complex character. When people don’t look beyond her surface, they find her easily dismissible. The writers too often wrote her this way during the series. But they also added many layers to her, as I’ve described in this meta.

Hyde

See the following metas I wrote about him:

Hyde’s Core Characterization Steven Hyde: Organic Character Development Steven Hyde: Inconsistent Characterization Hyde’s Character Shift from Season 4 to Season 5 Why Hyde Closes Himself Off More Emotionally in Season 5 Pathological Passive-Aggressiveness: A New Personality Trait Added to Hyde’s Character in Season 5 Hyde’s Potential Career

[automaticgiraffe]

Hi, I want to know: How do you deal with people stealing arts from you? That's what I'm afraid of if I post arts in my instagram or anywhere else.

I attempt to overwhelm their tactics with volume, like a tsunami that crushes those arrogant enough to build on the sand.  They may steal from me.  They may very well profit from me.  But if they are, they will never be able to get ahead of me.  Only I have the keys to what I make next. (Unless someone has commissioned me, then I’m morally, ethically and contractually bound to draw what they want).  

If they are looking to be known for being a great artist, they are failing because they are not actually learning to be an artist, only building a false empire on a powder keg of social ostracization waiting to be lit.  If they are looking to profit monetarily, they may be successful in the short term, but they will forever be capped by the webbed ceiling they have built out of bad faith.  The public tends not to take kindly to stealing from individuals.  There will always be people out to get them, and they will live their lives watching their backs.  That’s no victory in my eyes.  On top of that, if I become well known enough by simply doing what I enjoy in the first place (sharing my work and inspiring people), everyone that cares will be able to identify that someone is stealing from me and hopefully come to me first out of respect and decency.  They may also call out instances of theft that I’m unaware of, and inform more well meaning people.  Build bridges instead of walls and the community will take care of you by helping to fend of invaders with you.

Finally, I take it as a compliment and metric of my progress when people try to steal from me (I haven’t had any severe instances of it yet that I know of though)  If someone is willing to steal from me, it indicates a minimum quality level that secures me mindset moving forward and makes me more confident that I can deliver.  Even if I detest being stolen from in the short term, I feel devoting too much time and energy to directly dealing with it is wasted as I could have furthered my own journey instead.  Besides, the money I get from art is just to sustain myself so that I can continue the real goals of sharing my ideas, spreading good vibes, and hopefully inspiring and creating more artists and good people.  If I was always too worried to share things, then I probably wouldn’t be very good at that either.

tldr: I believe that ultimately you can’t stop thieves without hamstringing your own progress and momentum.  Put out a lot of your best work in good faith, and the universe will reward you in kind

[mittensmorgul]

I will always maintain that Dabb's finale's titles are incredibly meta and foreshadow the coming events. Given that this finale was titled Moriah (and I'm going back and forth on whether we got Jehovahjireh in the form of Sam), I can't help but speculate that S15 is going to be the transition from Old Testament to New Testament. There's a good reason why we never got a Christ figure before S13.

Hello from my inbox circa three weeks ago... >.>

(sorry I’m so far behind, but I’m still randomly spelunking through older messages and trying to reply as I can)

I had to google what Jehovahjireh meant, and I... don’t think that’s what we got in the literal sense of the term, but maybe something along these lines, from this article: https://www.gotquestions.org/Jehovah-Jireh.html:

The account of Abraham on Mt. Moriah thus becomes more than a dramatic illustration of faith and obedience. It is a presentation of the Lord’s eternal grace, continual provision, and all-encompassing wisdom. Jehovah-Jireh is not “The LORD Did Provide,” but “The LORD Will Provide.” In other words, the name does not simply memorialize a past event; it anticipates a future action.

With the highly ironic twist that God himself literally engineered this entire encounter in the first place. Which, again, is yet another nod to the spiral narrative, and this story that Chuck’s been telling and retelling literally forever. All of this has happened before, but Sam, Dean, and Cas have just leveled up and seen that bigger picture. And yay, I get to haul out one of the three gifs I’ve ever made, from 8.12:

Well, TFW just finally found a parking spot and stood their ground. Chuck did provide, and if they demonstrate faith in his instructions, he will provide all of this again-- all of this suffering, this horrific “I did what I had to do,” “I didn’t have a choice” moment where they must sacrifice everything to save the world again. And again and again and again...

Team Free Will, who have sacrificed so much over and over again in the name of preserving humanity and free will for everyone else, have never truly had it for themselves. Thanks, Chuck, for keeping them trapped in this narrative loop for the sake of drama, for the sake of watching his favorite characters reenact his favorite plot and never letting them enjoy any of the rewards for a job well done, you know?

That said, to me, Dabb’s season finale titles are more about pointing out this spiral narrative than they are about foreshadowing. Because seriously, what even is the point of foreshadowing within a cyclical narrative? Dabb didn’t NEED to foreshadow anything on the grand scale, because it’s all happened before, and it will all happen again... Let me explain.

Alpha and Omega. Dabb’s first season finale, in a season where he quietly took over the showrunner reins from Jeremy Carver somewhere shortly after midseason (and an argument can be made that he was already aware this shift was imminent when he wrote 11.10, even if it wasn’t official yet, seeing as how he began steering the narrative around this point...). This was arguably the culmination of one round of this Grand Narrative, hitting all the major plot points Chuck has included in every round-- sacrifice (Dean volunteering to “be the bomb,”), everyone working toward the common goal and all of them willing to make the ultimate sacrifice in the name of saving the universe again.

Alpha and Omega is “the beginning and the ending.” Or “the first and the last.” It’s referenced in the Book of Revelation. And 11.23 is an ending in many ways... the ending of that particular chapter in the mytharc of Supernatural, the ending of Chuck and Amara’s separation, the technical ending of the Carver Era, the end of s11 itself. But it’s also full of beginnings... the beginning of Dabb Era, the beginning of the next chapter in the mytharc of Supernatural (with the introduction of the BMoL and the unfridging of Mary Winchester that had begun the original era of Supernatural in 1.01, so in a sense Mary’s reappearance is both a Beginning AND an Ending... it’s spirals all the way down, my dudes). And it was narratively the beginning of TFW’s era serving as the “caretakers” of the Universe in Chuck’s supposed absence... that worked out great, right?

But this was always the story Dabb wanted to tell. His intent was always to point at the curtain, to draw our attention away from the Big Scary Glowing Head with all the smoke and mirrors and begin nudging us all to recognize the curtain over in the corner of the room where you could see some dude’s feet down at the bottom. He’s spent his entire tenure as showrunner effectively teaching us all how this entire story functions. More on this in a second, but first let’s look at 12.23:

All Along The Watchtower. There has been so much meta written about just this title alone, going back to even before the episode aired:

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/tagged/all%20along%20the%20watchtower/chrono

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/tagged/*all%20along%20the%20watchtower%20plays%20in%20the%20distance*/chrono

I’ve begun refiling all these posts under this tag:

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/tagged/it%27s-spirals-all-the-way-down/chrono

but I got derailed somewhere around 11.05, so there’s a gap... I need to get back to that retagging project someday >.>

I don’t know if you’ve ever watched Battlestar Galactica, but (spoiler alert), All Along The Watchtower was literally the magical key that unlocked the entire narrative, on pretty much every level-- in story, the notes of the song itself functioned as the “magic spell” that unlocked the Heroine’s Journey for the character of Kara Thrace, the narrative structure of the entire series which (surprise!) bore out to be a Grand Loop of a Spiral where the ending of the old story was simultaneously the same beginning of the same story, and the overarching structure of the divinity of that entire universe:

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/184126770915/justanotheridijiton

And I think that’s why Dabb chose this as his title here. He couldn’t possibly have chosen a more on-the-nose title, honestly... for an episode full of endings and beginnings, a window (or portal) onto a “failed world,” the birth of possibly either hope or destruction (or both simultaneously) with Jack, Castiel’s first True Death (wingprints and all!), and yet another revolution of the Same Story, the same song sung over again. Which brings us to 

Let The Good Times Roll: Heck my dudes, for whom did any good times actually roll in this episode? For Michael? Who defeated “his Lucifer” over in that “failed universe,” finally getting another chance to “do it right?” Wherein his idea of “doing it right” was simply to change a few elements like customizing Ikea cabinets with different drawer pulls and maybe the oak finish instead of the cherry? His goal was always still the same, you know? Even if his methods were different simply due to circumstance (no angel army in this world, so he picked monsters instead). For Dean? Who thought at the beginning of the episode that they might finally be getting ahead of the game and maybe were reaching a point where they didn’t have to shoulder the burdens of the world (talking about “toes in the sand” again at the beginning of the episode before Michael and Lucifer broke back into this world), and then by the end had finally lost everything that Cas had been fighting against since he first rebelled in 4.22, giving in and saying Yes to Michael, and then losing his free will entirely, completely overridden by Michael in a way that even Dean revoking his consent couldn’t evict him again? For Jack, who had his grace torn out by his father and was sent on a crash course in humanity, loss, sacrifice, love, and death? I mean, this was just a rolling around of the narrative again, forcing everyone to face this Worst Case Scenario of the apocalypse finally jumping back on the tracks again, even with Lucifer dead and Michael having killed him. Because Michael never wanted anything different than Lucifer did-- the end of the world, by whatever means necessary. There is no paradise on Earth, merely destruction and rebirth in an endless cycle that Michael wanted to bring to an end.

It’s spirals all the way down, and the archangels just... don’t even have the ability to recognize that, let alone consider defying it.

Hello, 7.21: DEAN: Oh, I don't know, man. What can I say? You've been chosen. And it sucks. Believe me. There's no use asking "why me?" 'Cause the angels – they don't care. I think maybe they just don't have the equipment to care. Seems like when they try, it just... breaks them apart.

Because in Dabb era, it’s kinda clear that that should’ve been the angels’ goal all along.

So instead of an ending (despite several things ending-- like Lucifer and Dean’s free will), we also have a fresh beginning. Welcome to Apocalypse Again.

Which finally brings us to

Moriah. More beginnings, more endings, but more importantly, the first actual transcendence of the narrative spiral by the characters themselves. TFW finally managed to throw back the curtain and see the weaselly lil dude standing behind it. And this has always, ALWAYS been Dabb’s endgame gambit. Every turn of the narrative up to this point has been leading up to this moment of syzygy where every character, every plot element, finally aligned for them to look through all the narrative loops and finally see the truth at the center of the story.

Here’s where I start detouring for the sake of clarity. Bear with me while this becomes murky as pea soup before finally coming back together. This post I wrote five days after 12.23 aired basically called this out:

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/160988290690/12-while-i-do-not-ask-this-to-be-negative-at

And used this graphic in that post to explain shifting the viewer’s perspective on the narrative structure in order to understand the bigger picture of what the show is telling us with the narrative:

And this is what I mean by narrative syzygy. TFW-- inside the story-- have finally found themselves standing at the correct angle where all the plot points have lined up, and they can now see the universe looking directly back at them, quite literally. They finally, in story, have the full picture of where they stand versus God and the Universe.

And it’s unsettling!

But back to the point I abandoned before this detour. If you’re thinking of Moriah only in relation to the Abraham/Isaac story, you are missing fully half the relevant reference. You only need to look back to the very beginning of Jack’s life, and 13.02, to recall the other specific biblical reference relevant to Moriah: Solomon’s temple. (yes, I recognize that David built an altar there, and other temples have been built there, but Solomon has specifically been connected to Jack from the start, so we’re gonna go with his construction of the temple... but it is relevant to bear in mind the cycle of sacrifice, death, destruction, rebirth, and rebuilding all associated with Mt. Moriah, too).

The Big Reveal in 14.20-- everything from Jack’s “stop lying” and the ensuing chaos to Chuck’s hand being forced when his guys threw down the gun and refused to act out this specific sacrifice in a graveyard-- literally a place filled with monuments to the dead, including a statue/fountain of Mary and a rusted fence surrounding a tomb that looks suspiciously temple-like:

Birth, Death, Sacrifice, Faith, all in a never ending cycle. The characters have been trapped in this loop since the beginning of time, or at least since 1.01, unwittingly living out the same story over and over again, but each time leveling up in some way, and gaining perspective on another element of the narrative on each go-around. Each time through the loop, they may have faced the same Big Picture-- the current iteration of the Big Bad, the family dynamics, the struggle for personal growth, and their understanding of the universe in general and their places in it specifically. This is the Grand Story of Supernatural, on every level.

But now, in this final spiral of the story, the circle has finally been broken, and our guys are now aware that that gif I used above from 8.12 is literally the story of their entire lives, and they have confronted the source of that fact and finally broken free from it.

Cue the zombies. Because heck Chuck is mad they broke his story, and it looks like he doesn’t accept defeat graciously...

TFW only has one more Big Bad to defeat-- the story itself.

[ad-sanandum]

Begin Again

I have always had the habit of journaling but somehow, I lost touch with it after secondary school. As a nerdy and awkward teenager, I would carry my journal around with me and write down thoughts as they flowed. I would literally write about everything that had happened at school, and my thoughts on the situation. However, as I grew older, I would only pen down my thoughts every once in a while, especially during significant life events, or when I simply felt the urge to.

I do want to get back into the regular habit of keeping a diary. I'm always filled with a deep sense of bittersweet nostalgia when I read my previous entries - they're like a portal that transports me back into the past. When I read the words that I had penned down, it's like I'm relieving those moments all over again, with all the emotions and feelings attached.

~~~

I will be starting Med school at Duke-NUS come July. It still feels surreal to me. I remember when I first got the news of the acceptance, I kept feeling like somehow they were going to call me and say that it was a mistake, that the spot had been offered to me by mistake and that it had meant to be given to someone else. That somehow there had been a mix-up involved, some administrative error, and that I hadn't managed to get it. In a way, I was afraid of letting myself become too happy as deep down, I thought that it was impossible that they wanted me.

Over time, I guess those feelings faded. If it was truly offered to me by mistake, they should've called me by now, right? I started telling more and more people of the good news. It slowly started to become a real possibility in my head. But it still feels so, so surreal. I still can't believe I'm going to be a doctor. Dr Nichole Tan, MD.

~~~

I started feeling a lot of emotions tonight. I think the act of telling others about my whole MCAT and pre-Med journey is in a way, me relieving the whole experience internally. And it was the toughest, but most rewarding journey so far (apart from my walk with God). The pre-Med journey is a very personal journey. Everyone comes from different places and has different reasons for wanting to me a Doctor. And we all had to overcome our own Goliath. I had never in my life, studied so much and so hard for something that had absolutely no guarantee. There was no guarantee that waking up at 430am before work to study was going to pay off. There was no guarantee that spending close to a thousand dollars on the exam was going to pay off. There was no guarantee that sacrificing my health, work, and relationships for 3 months was going to pay off. If I could describe my pre-Med journey in a single word, it would be faith. There was no certainty that everything would pay off, but I had faith that it would. But anyway, telling people about the whole process somehow made me want to reflect on this tonight.

I had been so, so blessed beyond measure. I was reading old messages from friends during the period of time when I was in the thick of studying for the MCAT. And it just became so clear how God has provided, taken care of, and loved me. I had known this all along, but seeing it with my own eyes made me even more certain of this fact. What were the odds that my colleague just so happened to have 2 weeks of annual leave that I so badly needed, right before the MCAT, and that she was willing to let me have it? What were the odds that I had been blessed with so much love and support from my friends? From buying me food, to asking about me, and to praying for me every step of the way - all these good things surely came from Someone above who loved me first.

~~~

So, I guess the point of making this blog is to document my feelings and thoughts over the next 4 years of Med school, in the hopes that these entries form some sort of repository, or time machine, so that I can relieve these moments in the future.

I don't know where I'll be in 4 years. What kind of person I'll become, what will I have, what will I have not. Who will be with me, who will I have lost. But I write these things in the hopes that someday, I will look back on them and see how far I have come :)

[scripture-pictures]

https://victorcarjan.blogspot.com/2018/11/bible-case-for-no-have-baby.html?m=1 Scripture to back up why I think its wrong to have babies!

Isaiah 13:8 And they shall be afraid: pangs and sorrows shall take hold of them;

they shall be in pain as a woman that travaileth:

they shall be amazed one at another; their faces shall be as flames.

1st: A horrible punishment from God is letting some guys know they will be in pain

like a woman giving birth!.....normally never have to think about this;

but if its so bad to me, why would I accept this precept of "nature" to put the girl I theoretically

would really love, in this sort of punishment!

Is it a punishment?

my answer is YES!!

Genesis 3:16

“Unto the woman he said,

I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and

thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children;

and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.”

2nd Definitely a punishment the amount of pain they go through!;

so one way to avoid this punishment would be to avoid having the babies right?

I perceive, that is what I would do and if one is truly a believer and has faith,

then they would be willing to wait until the after-life right?

ISAIAH 56:4 For thus saith the LORD unto the eunuchs

that keep my sabbaths, and choose the things that please me, and take hold of my covenant;

5 Even unto them will I give in mine house and within my walls a place

and a name better than of sons and of daughters:

I will give them an everlasting name, that shall not be cut off.

3rd point: Eunuchs, as far as I understand, means like a barren man;

a man that doesn't have babies, or can't have babies, or chooses not to have babies.

Sounds like God says he will reward them better than the sons and daughters!..

.so then its a reward?

Jesus in LUKE 23:29

28But Jesus turning unto them said, Daughters of Jerusalem,

weep not for me, but weep for yourselves, and for your children.

29For, behold, the days are coming, in the which they shall say,

Blessed are the barren,

and the wombs that never bare,

and the paps which never gave suck.

30Then shall they begin to say to the mountains, Fall on us; and to the hills,

Cover us. 31For if they do these things

in a green tree,

what shall be done in the dry?

ISAIAH Chapter 32

9 Rise up, ye women that are at ease; hear my voice,

ye careless daughters; give ear unto my speech.

10 Many days and years shall ye be troubled,

ye careless women: for the vintage shall fail, the gathering shall not come.

11 Tremble, ye women that are at ease; be troubled, ye careless ones:

strip you, and make you bare, and gird sackcloth upon your loins.

12 They shall lament for the teats,

for the pleasant fields, for the fruitful vine.

4th: who are they? I'm not sure!...but as I remember at this point, the context of his message

was that it was good to not have babies at least in those days for sure!..

but its a help to an argument using scripture as the sword and shield to state its better to

not have babies in this world presently in.

ISAIAH 54:1 Sing, O barren, thou that didst not bear;

break forth into singing, and cry aloud, thou that didst not travail

with child: for more are the children of the desolate

than the children of the married wife, saith the LORD.

5th: Clearly God, creator, is saying to woman to sing and be happy and rejoice

like she won something by not having babies!.. she avoided a major punishment

of woman by not having babies, I believe that is certainly true!...

Jeremiah 16:1-4

1The word of the LORD came also unto me, saying,

2Thou shalt not take thee a wife, neither shalt thou have sons

or daughters in this place.

3For thus saith the LORD concerning the sons and concerning the daughters

that are born in this place, and concerning their mothers that bare

them, and concerning their fathers that begat them in this land;

4They shall die of grievous deaths; they shall not be lamented;

neither shall they be buried; but they shall be as dung upon the face of the earth:

and they shall be consumed by the sword, and by famine; and

their carcases shall be meat for the fowls of heaven, and for the

beasts of the earth.

(sounds like the Feast of the fowls at the end of the days as mentioned in

Revelations and in the old testament of Ezekiel,

please fear God and pay the respects due to make full good of these warnings)

Jeremiah 4:31 For I have heard a voice as of a woman in travail,

and the anguish as of her that bringeth forth her first child,

the voice of the daughter of Zion, that bewaileth herself...

6th ahh, pain...the first child must be a lot worse than its true;

the first one hurts more and after that its been opened already and stretched out

so I guess it makes sense..but I just don't like it anymore at all. its too gruesome sounding..

Jeremiah 13:21 What wilt thou say when he shall punish thee?

for thou hast taught them to be captains,

and as chief over thee: shall not sorrows take thee,

as a woman in travail?

Jeremiah 22:23 O inhabitant of Lebanon, that makest thy nest in the cedars,

how gracious shalt thou be when pangs come upon thee,

the pain as of a woman in travail!

7th: Its not gracious and its a punishment; and its a warning from God to man,

that if you do wrong won't you get punished like a woman in travail or something?

HORRIBLE!! thus if I conclude its a horrible punishment how can I then justify

wanting to put someone through it?

Prayer; please God never let me have to go through pains

like a woman in travail or anything like it;

or like how Krillin from dragon ball z was depicted in those videos to help understand scripture;

please help me;

I do believe that before the punishment it was different having babies;

I don't know how exactly; but clearly different since it says greatly multiplying the pain..

8.24.18 2.34 A.M. update

Thoughts: Thus then, if we be towards the end of the world based on all the signs shown;

we may be in a similar scenario

ECCLESIASTES 3:5 a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

1 JOHN 3: 9 Whosoever is born of God doth not commit sin;

for his seed remaineth in him: and he cannot sin,

because he is born of God.

Leviticus 12 WHY SIN OFFERING FOR HAVING BABY?

1And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying, 2Speak unto the children of Israel, saying,

If a woman have conceived seed, and born a man child:

then she shall be unclean seven days; according to the days

of the separation for her infirmity shall she be unclean.

5But if she bear a maid child, then she shall be unclean

two weeks, as in her separation: and she shall continue in the blood of

her purifying threescore and six days.

6 And when the days of her purifying are fulfilled, for a son, or for a daughter,

she shall bring a lamb of the first year for a burnt offering, and a young pigeon,

or a turtledove, for a sin offering, unto the door of the tabernacle

of the congregation, unto the priest:

7 Who shall offer it before the LORD, and make an atonement for her; and

she shall be cleansed from the issue of her blood. This is the law for her that hath

born a male or a female.

8 And if she be not able to bring a lamb, then she shall bring two turtles,

or two young pigeons; the one for the burnt offering, and the

other for a sin offering: and the priest shall make an atonement for her,

and she shall be clean.

MISCELLANEOUS

Jesus said in MATTHEW 24:19

19 And woe unto them that are with child,

and to them that give suck in those days!

Jesus said in LUKE 21:22+23

22 For these be the days of vengeance, that all things which are written may be fulfilled.

23 But woe unto them that are with child, and to them that give suck, in those days!

for there shall be great distress in the land, and wrath upon this people.

Jesus said in MARK 13:17

17 But woe to them that are with child, and to them that give suck in those days!

This regarding HOSEA 9, I believe can be best understood when referencing the passage

in ECCLESIASTES where the preacher saw all the oppressions done under the sun and praised the

dead more than the living, and said that better than both the dead and the living was that which never

existed. We also have Jeremiah in the book of JEREMIAH wishing he was never born, and Jonah in

JONAH wishing for death, and even Elijah wanting to not live. So if the world is a painful place to exist,

to bring a child into that world wouldn’t be righteous, and thus,

God giving them a miscarrying womb could be a greatly misunderstood mercy!

Who would feel good about bringing a child into this world to have it

be treated like the woman in Gibeah from Judges 19?

HOSEA 9

9 They have deeply corrupted themselves, as in the days of Gibeah: therefore

he will remember their iniquity, he will visit their sins.

11 As for Ephraim, their glory shall fly away like a bird, from the birth, and from the womb, and from the conception.

12 Though they bring up their children, yet will I bereave them,

that there shall not be a man left: yea, woe also to them when I depart from them!

13 Ephraim, as I saw Tyrus, is planted in a pleasant place:

but Ephraim shall bring forth his children to the murderer.

14 Give them, O LORD: what wilt thou give? give them a miscarrying womb and dry breasts.

Only more recently did I see this prayer by Hosea as a prayer of Mercy and love.

I wonder if others had similar experiences searching for the kingdom of God and his righteousness.

Also remember Rachel died during giving birth to her 2nd Child,

Genesis 35:16 ...and Rachel travailed, and she had hard labour. 17And it came to pass, when she was in hard labour, that the midwife said unto her, Fear not; thou shalt have

this son also. 18And it came to pass, as her soul was in departing,

(for she died) that she called his name Benoni:

but his father called him Benjamin. 19And Rachel died...

Jeremiah 9:24 King James Version (KJV)

24 But let him that glorieth glory in this, that he understandeth and knoweth me, that I am the Lord which exercise lovingkindness, judgment, and righteousness, in the earth: for in these things I delight, saith the Lord.

[foresightofthelakes]

Do you answer asks? My fear of losing people makes me try to manipulate situations so I don't lose people, and the thing is I was never losing them to begin with it's just my BS mind telling me I am. This is scary to me, it snot of God. I'm scared of the judgement I'll face from it and I'm scared of the people who could be hurt by my overwhelming anxiety. I'm supposed to be a Christian. Why is this happening? It's not Christian so why? Am I just not there? I'm so afraid of it. It's poison.

I do answer asks, as best and as soon as I can! I had work last night/today, I apologize for not responding sooner.

I promise, you’re not alone in feeling fear/anxiety over losing the people closest to you– God built us for love and companionship, and especially with having something like separation anxiety, even the smaller things can quickly become an emotional blur. Having anxiety/ptsd myself, I know loneliness and isolation can be incredibly painful. But the number one thing I can assure you, in my experience, is that you’re going to be okay. God has you in His hands, and no force in Heaven or on Earth will ever take you away from Him. In the end, He holds tomorrow; In the end, you will always be okay.

There’s an inherent desire in us to protect the people we love and to preserve and heal the relationships we have. When you say manipulate, however, I might assume the manipulation primarily stems from lack of trust seeing as you haven’t had a lot of time to build trust with anyone (which is a main pillar in all relationships). Because trust is fundamental in every relationship and because we’re designed entirely for them, it’s easy to see why it’s one of the hardest things to build and work at in our lives. Trust demands courage, strength, and time.

You’re right in both seeking Christ to be the center of your friendships, and in knowing that the enemy will throw fiery darts at you to discourage and isolate you in any way possible. Before anything else, my first thought would be to build your trust with God. Know that He loves you, He created you, and that you are more than enough for Him. He called you to Him and knew all of your flaws before He stitched you together in the womb. You belong to Him and there’s nothing about you or your heart or your pain that He doesn’t know. He’s always with you, and He’ll never leave you or forsake you.

Second, we as Christians will stand before what’s called the bema seat of Christ. Here’s a quick excerpt from gotquestions.org:

The judgment seat of Christ does not determine salvation; that was determined by Christ’s sacrifice on our behalf (1 John 2:2) and our faith in Him (John 3:16). All of our sins are forgiven, and we will never be condemned for them (Romans 8:1). We should not look at the judgment seat of Christ as God judging our sins, but rather as God rewarding us for our lives. Yes, as the Bible says, we will have to give an account of ourselves. Part of this is surely answering for the sins we committed. However, that is not going to be the primary focus of the judgment seat of Christ.

At the judgment seat of Christ, believers are rewarded based on how faithfully they served Christ (1 Corinthians 9:4-27; 2 Timothy 2:5). Some of the things we might be judged on are how well we obeyed the Great Commission (Matthew 28:18-20), how victorious we were over sin (Romans 6:1-4), and how well we controlled our tongues (James 3:1-9). The Bible speaks of believers receiving crowns for different things based on how faithfully they served Christ (1 Corinthians 9:4-27; 2 Timothy 2:5). The various crowns are described in 2 Timothy 2:5, 2 Timothy 4:8, James 1:12, 1 Peter 5:4, and Revelation 2:10. James 1:12 is a good summary of how we should think about the judgment seat of Christ: “Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.”

Please bear in mind, the word bema in Greek was used as being the judge’s seat in the arena for Olympic games- it’s not where the judge sat to punish contestants, but presented awards to the victors. Christ payed the atonement for our sins and cleared our slate so we wouldn’t have to face punishment. Do not be afraid.

Last, I would suggest opening up to your friends about your separation anxiety and how this has been burdening your heart. Let them know that you’re trying to build trust and you want honest, healthy relationships with them- and perhaps even that you need time to work at it. The friends worth having will have understanding and be patient. They’ll want to learn with you and stick together through trying times. Remember, too, that it’s trying times that define people/relationships and that you shouldn’t worry about future trials. And even if somehow you do become distant from a friend, that’s okay. People grow and change, and sometimes distance is an inevitability. People come and go as a part of life and the human experience, but you’re never alone because you’ll always have Christ. You will always be enough for Him.

If you ever need someone to talk to, whether it be small talk or to not feel so alone, my inbox/messaging is always open. :) I know there’s a lot of great people in the Tumblr Christian community that I’m certain would be delighted to make friends with you, too! If you’d like, talk to anyone including @aubs-of-steel, @my–darling–dear, @professorlogan81, @hope-faith-love-abide, @penumbra369, @thescienceofapologetics … There’s a lot of friendly people here that are always willing to lend a listening ear. 

[aphrodicted]

Hello there!! How are you doing? I hope all is well with you. I'm HH, ♓☀️,♊🌕. Can I have a reading? So I have been manifesting few things in my life. And I always wonder if universe got my request. Even if I say thankyou, I think what if it didn't reach? So I just wanted a reading on that, what are the signs I should look for and what blessings are on my way?

Gracias ( that's the only Spanish word I know and I love it) ❤️❤️❤️✨✨ Have a good day.

¡Hola, cariño! You’re so cute and your spanish is really cute too. I’m really good! How are you, angel?

Depending on what you want to get manifested, you should look at one method or another. For example, for material things: a list written in blue and taking it with you may be the correct method. However, to manifest a specific person or relationship, a letter to the Universe you can hide and forget later would be a more satisfying method. Remember the detachment is essential in these cases and, on some occasions, not being able to detach yourself from the desire or the need to achieve that manifestation can become an obstacle.

What are the signs you should look for: Seven of Cups, The Hanged Man, Five of Wands, Six of Pentacles.

One of the first messages that has come to my head has been "dreams". Your dreams can be a great source of signs that you should be aware of. I don't know if you have a notebook where you can write down your dreams, but I recommend paying attention to your dreams from now on. Especially elements like animals, flowers, colors and numbers that you can see on them.

The cards ask to focus the signals from another point of view. It’s possible that you aren’t interpreting the signals correctly or you do not know how to see the signals that are around you. Don’t expect to see great things as signs, since strange things don’t always have to happen to think they are signs, but the Universe will contact you in a simple way that you understand. It’s important to work on your relationship with the Universe or the one you have previously asked. The relationship you have with the Universe is poorly focused and you are not getting the most out of it. Don’t get angry or confront anything, since the dispute will not bring that manifestation that you want so much.

Another method that you should try is meditation. During the meditation you will receive images as a message from the Universe to know when these manifestations will arrive. They may not give you an exact date, but those meditation sessions will help you notice how close you are to receiving those rewards from the Universe. However, you must fight against any negative thoughts you may have. Things will come to your life, everything you have asked for will come, but having negative thoughts and sticking to that need for everything to come quickly does not help anything to materialize. Even the opinions of other people who do not believe that you get what you want can be a problem, so do not let the negativity of you and others affect you.

Finally, don’t forget the generosity and unconditionality with the Universe. It isn’t just giving thanks, but having a grateful attitude and working in accordance with the Universe. Look for unconditional love in everything you do. That is one way to thank the Universe. Even sitting down once a week or once a month and making a list of things for which you are grateful to the Universe can be used as an offering so that those manifestations that you are waiting for are fulfilled.

You shouldn’t do great things, but be aware of your dreams and continue working in accordance with the Universe.

What blessings are on your way: Knight of Pentacles, Ace of Wands, The Hierophant, Knight of Cups.

Much love to you from the Universe, darling! A very positive love relationship for you is about to come into your life. It’s possible this person is an earth sign or a water sign like you, although they appear as someone who is very balanced, confident and eager to start something with you. A person very committed to their personal relationships. This person will fall deeply in love with you, so they won't waste time getting a special connection with you. Don’t be afraid to make decisions in your love life, as you will do the right thing.

However, you should keep in mind everything will not go as fast as you would like and, at least in the beginning, you will need to have a little patience. Even the Universe may be asking you for a little more time before this person shows up! Things are going slow, but steady. If you want everything to manifest, you will have to have a little more patience.

Finally, this person who appears in your life is described as someone faithful and loyal who will be willing to propose anything to you without fear. However, this person may be a bit "old" and want an old-fashioned love relationship. It may be a bit traditional and not willing to try certain things too modern for him or her.

¡Gracias, mi amor!

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