#I'm so sleepy sorry for the bad wording in Everything here

[solidwater05]

Here's a link: https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GFcyHDkW0AA_SFm?format=jpg&name=900x900

It's from NGL

Mandatory 'don't harass anyone in this story' disclaimer

[ID: An image with the header "send me anonymous messages!" and the text "do you know who this guy keter guy (@solidwater05) on Tumblr is? he's been shit talking you for some reason". /End ID]

Alright so. I talking about this with an acquaintance and she tracked down the tweet (link), so this is real

Now, I don't know this person, and I definitely didn't shit talk him or anyone else for that matter.

I have an idea of what's going on but I'm too tired to explain it. It's not really a big deal, just minor internet drama, so don't worry about it

[ilyrafe]

𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒍𝒚 𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈 ✧ 𝒓. 𝒄.

pairing: rafe cameron x f!reader

warnings: brief sexual innuendo, rafe being a softie!!!!

word count: 2.6k (i *might* have gotten carried away i'm so sorry lol)

a/n: this is a sequel to late night and also based on this, so thanks @keziahcore ! your mind is literally everything!

it’s almost like a sixth sense.

rafe feels your absence from the bed, and immediately becomes agitated. he turns on the lamp next to his bed and looks for any sign that you’re still there, and finds your small handbag on the armchair, which makes him just slightly relieved. 

when he looks at the clock, he sees that it is almost two in the morning. the bathroom door is ajar and the lights are off, which means you’re not there. before he can leave his room looking for you, you return, holding a glass of water, wearing only his shirt to cover yourself up.

“where were you? why did you leave me here?”

he can��t control this agony, this anguish that always catches him off guard when he finds himself alone. he can’t help feeling like a time bomb, ready to explode at any moment. the smallest things you do seem to trigger him massively, and he hates that. he hates that he ends up being rude and harsh to you, because you’re always so understanding and sweet.

even he knows he doesn’t deserve you.

“i was thirsty and went downstairs to drink some water.” your tone is sweet and calm, which makes him feel like shit.

his face changes, as he seems to calm down. you didn’t leave him, you just went to get some water. you’re there, your stuff is there, you’re not going anywhere.

“next time, leave a glass here. i don’t like it when you do that.” he says in a much softer tone, but he’s still upset that his sleep got interrupted.

“do what? get hydrated?” you joke, trying to lighten up his mood.

he rolls his eyes and huffs. don’t make him tell the truth.

“go back to bed. i’m tired, alright? i had a long day.”

“actually, i was going to read a book. i’m not sleepy and i don’t want to lie down right now.”

is it so hard to understand that he wants you to be close to him so that he feels safe enough to get a decent night’s sleep?

“you can read on the bed.”

“you won’t mind the lamp on?”

“no, just get the damn book and come back to bed.”

you laugh and nod, picking up the book from his desk and following him to his bed. rafe gets to his spot and as you sit down, he places one hand on your bare thigh and falls back to sleep almost immediately.

while he dives deep into his necessary rest, you start reading. it’s that book, in cold blood by truman capote. you don’t know if rafe is a reader, he never really talks about books with you.

every once in a while, you look down at your thighs to see his hand, firmly holding you, to make sure you won’t leave. this small gesture makes you feel stupid. stupid to believe he might feel something other than lust for you. rafe makes you question your beliefs and that itself makes you feel overwhelmed.

sometimes you want to leave, but you can’t bring yourself to do it. and you have tried countless times. he’s good for you in the same intensity he’s bad. to say you’re scared to ask him what you are would be an understatement, but you just would like some clarification, because you don’t beg the people you’re casually fucking to stay the night almost every night and throw a tantrum when they leave to get some water.

deep down, you know you’re more scared to hear you’re just an easy fuck. at this point, this would tear you apart.

being with rafe is a challenge. it’s like running a marathon you know you will not get to the finish line, and yet, you keep running.

when it’s almost four in the morning, you close the book and turn the lamp off. finally, sleep comes to you, and you settle into his bed, still holding rafe’s hand, which never left your thigh. with the touch, rafe wakes up, and this time he is no longer agitated.

“sorry, didn’t mean to wake you.” you say, as you snuggle into the mattress.

“you- what time is it?” he asks, adorably confused and sleepy.

“it’s almost four.”

“and you’re going to sleep now?”

“yeah. go back to sleep, it’s early.” you say softly, placing a hand on his cheek, and he complies, pulling you close.

(...)

rafe’s alarm clock rings promptly at seven in the morning. he turns it off and goes back to his previous position: hugging you.

your hair smells like coconut and your skin is always soft. he never wants to not be touching you. it’s like your body was made to be next to his. for some reason, just your presence is enough to make him feel calm and at peace.

he places the softest kiss on your shoulder, enjoying the quietness that only early mornings can give him. the sweet sound of birds chirping outside makes him forget about everything else. rafe only has you in his mind (and in his arms).

you wake up and soon turn to face him. rafe has the most adorable sleepy face, and you might never stop melting over him. seeing him up close will never not be amazing. he’s the most handsome man you’ve ever seen. he probably has the most beautiful shade of blue in his eyes.

“go back to sleep.” he whispers.

“‘m not sleepy anymore.” you mumble as you rub your eyes, which rafe finds captivating. “hi.”

“hi,” he smiles. “you only slept for three hours, sleep some more.” he insists, and you feel a tone of concern in his voice, but maybe it’s just your sleep giving you that impression.

“i’m okay, rafey.”

rafey. he hates that stupid nickname, but when it comes out of your mouth, he wants to legally change his name to it.

“you’re gonna be tired.”

“no, i’m not. i don’t normally sleep a lot.”

rafe frowns not because he’s confused - he obviously isn’t. he’s just not liking what you’re saying. he doesn’t like the idea of you struggling with whatever that may be. rafe knows damn well how bad it is to be sleep deprived, he doesn’t want you going through that.

“you have insomnia?”

“i guess i do,” you shrug. “i don’t really know. i just don’t sleep a lot. i wish i did, though. i get so jealous when i see you sleeping for hours on end.” you smile sweetly at him. “you’re so relaxed. must be nice…”

you let go of rafe after leaving a timid kiss on his lips, and stretch before getting up and going to his bathroom to start your morning routine.

after a quiet breakfast, rafe gives you a ride home, and he can’t hide his concern about what you said.

“i’ll see you around, yeah?” you tell him, with the sweetest smile you always have.

“of course. uh, about that sleep thing… if you need help with that… i’m here.”

“rafe, i think you might be a sex addict.” you joke, really not understanding what he meant. he isn’t talking about sex. the one time he isn’t talking about sex, you don’t get it.

“well, i’m just one call away.”

you chuckle and intend to kiss his cheek, but rafe is quick enough to turn his face and make you kiss his lips. you laugh at his antics.

silly rafe is your favorite. if only other people got to see this side of him.

he watches you leave his car and get inside your home. the strange feeling of loneliness comes back almost immediately, but it gets him thinking. it has to be some sort of irony that the person that quite literally helps him sleep isn’t sleeping.

(...)

only two days have passed and rafe already needs you to spend the night at his house again. he is so tired and exhausted. he takes out his phone and quickly types a message.

rafe: are u busy right now? can i pick u up?

you don’t tend to take long to respond to his texts, but this time, an hour goes by and nothing, so rafe starts to feel that unbearable anguish again, and starts to think that you left him and that you found someone better to spend you time with.

impulsively, rafe facetimes you, and you answer. from your face alone, he can see the tiredness in your eyes. or rather, in your dark circles. you’re in your bedroom, which makes him feel calmer.

“hi, rafey. sorry, i just got my phone.”

“what are you doing?”

“i’m studying for my exams.”

“i just wanted to know if i could pick you up.”

“i’d love to,” you smile. “but it’s not a good idea, i need to study and i have a mountain of books to read until tomorrow if i want a good grade, which i do.”

“you’re tired, you should rest.” he advises, visibly worried.

“nothing a can of red bull can’t fix.” you say showing him the can.

“y/n, please go to sleep.”

something about his request makes you angry. maybe it’s the stress, or the fact that this time rafe is right.

“rafe, you’re not my boss. i need to hang up, i got shit to do.”

before he can protest, you hang up the call, and surprisingly, rafe doesn’t get angry. this is what it’s like when he’s sleep deprived.

as always, rafe wants to take control of the situation, so he puts on a hoodie, grabs his car keys and leaves his house to go to yours. it’s late at night, and rafe knows your parents are probably asleep.

the path is short, and soon he arrives in front of your house and the light is on in your bedroom, which tells him that you are still up. carefully, rafe gets out of his car and walks to the back of your residence, and climbs the wall, always making sure he doesn’t get caught by anyone. finally, rafe gets on the small balcony of your room and sees you surrounded by papers, books and notebooks. it’s a mess.

he knocks on the glass door, which startles you, but you soon calm down when you see it’s him. you almost run to open the door, but your face isn’t the happiest.

“what are you doing here, rafe?”

“nice to see you, too.” he ironizes as he steps inside your bedroom. “i have a proposition for you.”

“i’m so not in the mood, rafe…”

“listen to me.” he says. “i’ll… i’ll help you out with this stuff, as long as you let me help you sleep.”

“i don’t wanna have sex.”

“i’m not talking about sex.”

oh.

“you mean… sleep? like, really sleep?”

“yeah. i don’t like that you sleep so little. you’re becoming cranky.”

you chuckle at the last bit. you can’t stay mad at him, can you?

“that’s a nice offer, rafe, but what do you know about biology?”

“i’ll have you know i was a good student.” he pouts and you laugh. “even if i don’t know what you’re studying, i’ll help you out.”

it takes you a few seconds, but it’s decided. your body is about to give out, you really need to rest. you can’t absorb any more information. a good sleep might even help you learn whatever you need.

“okay.”

rafe smiles and it might be the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen.

you begin to organize all your notes and books on your desk and rafe begins to undress down to his underwear, and gets comfortable on your bed. he realizes this is his first time sleeping on your bed, and he already likes the faint smell of rosemary that your bedroom exudes.

you have such a pretty bedroom. the walls are painted in the softest shade of blue, and you have books everywhere. no wonder you’re so smart, you read a lot.

the wooden furniture gives an earthy feel to your room, contrasting with the delicacy of the light blue walls. in the photos of the small mural on the wall, rafe realizes that he wanted to be there, present in the photos, and maybe, in a photo with you. you are always smiling and being hugged by someone, or hugging them. you are like that, you are magnetic.

you finish organizing your things and quickly change into a shirt of rafe’s that you hope he doesn’t recognize. it’s big and comfortable, and it makes you feel close to him when he’s far away.

the lamp next to your bed is on, so you turn off the main light in your room and go to your bed, meeting rafe, and he has the smallest smile on his lips. it’s ironic how having sex and being naked doesn’t feel as intimate as simply sleeping together does.

“are your parents home?” he asks.

“no, why?”

“so i could have come through the door, huh.”

“yeah.” you laugh.

a brief moment of silence sits between you two, as you’re staring at each other’s eyes. rafe is mesmerized and terrified at the same time. this - whatever this is - feels so nice and so foreign. he knows damn well he isn’t one to want to just sleep with someone, let alone climb up a wall to just sleep with someone.

rafe cameron is in love, and he is utterly terrified.

“what are you thinking?” you ask in a whisper.

your blinks are getting slower and slower. rafe begins to run his hand through your hair, combing them back, and touching the skin of your neck and shoulders ever so softly.

thinking about how much i want to be with you and how fucking scared i am.

“nothin’. close your eyes.”

you do, not because he told you to, but because you couldn’t keep them open any longer. 

why do you feel the safest with someone as dangerous as rafe cameron? someone who deals with the shadiest people around, that has anger issues and violent behavior.

that tried to drown his own sister.

why none of that matters when you’re in his arms? are you actually insane?

probably.

(...)

as soon as you wake up, you see your bed empty, and rafe’s clothes are no longer on the floor, where he had left them last night. it was to be expected, but you still feel disappointed. he was so sweet last night.

when you look at the clock, it’s already past nine in the morning, which means you’ve slept, surprisingly, eight hours straight. damn, you really were sleep deprived.

the sound of your stomach begging for food makes you get out of bed.

when you leave your bedroom, you hear the sound of the tv on and get scared. slowly, without making any noise, you go down the stairs, trying to find out if your house has been invaded, but it would be strange, as it is daytime. soon you see rafe walking around your house.

he didn’t leave?

it’s like you’re not even there. you get to watch rafe make himself comfortable in your kitchen, looking for stuff to put on the table. there are two delivery bags on the counter, which means he bought food, but the gesture warms your heart, which was merely shattered.

“the cutlery is in the second drawer next to the sink.” you say, startling him a bit.

“jesus. can you, i don’t know, announce you’re in the room? i almost dropped your coffee.”

you laugh.

“sorry, rafey. what are you doing, i thought you had left.”

“uh, i bought breakfast for y- us.” he says. you look inside the bags and you can tell he ordered possibly everything you have eaten from that place. “c’mon, i ordered that vegan shit you like, your coffee and even a pretzel.”

you follow him to the table and you both begin helping yourselves. this isn’t your first time having breakfast with him, but it does feel like it’s a first.

for the first time, you don’t want to leave him.

i love feedback! let me know your thoughts! <3

[bananayuyu]

Cabin Fever [part 2]

Pairing: Yunho x f reader

Genre: fluff and smut

Word count: 9.7k

Summary: The third day of your trip brings a storm, and even more cramps. You try to navigate the day the best you can, but really you just need to be taken care of, in the way it matters most.

Warnings: MDNI, smut, fingering, period sex, use of a condom, reader has really bad cramps again, some mxm (Seonghwa and Hongjoong)

A/n: I have had such a fun time writing this part, thank you all for the response on part 1! I am falling in love with this cozy world and wish I could live in it for real. Thank you so much to the anon who requested a part 2! I hope you all enjoy <3

Taglist: @pautiny27 @kierraperkins3 @yoonjikim @luvbit3z @pancake-freckle

I'm definitely planning on continuing the series for a while so if you want to be tagged for upcoming parts, let me know!

You can read part 3 here!

You stretch over to find your phone, unhooking it from its charging cable. The light is dim through the window, the room looks almost hazy. Squinting at the screen, you see a missed text from Seonghwa asking if you're doing okay, sent an hour ago.

"It's almost 11:30, we should really get up," you yawn, poking Yunho in the ribs to get his attention. He has once again wrapped himself around you tightly, face buried in your hair, and you're not sure if he's even awake.

"No," he groans, his voice low and gravely. It sends a shudder through you, and all of the feelings from last night surface again. You can already feel the pains starting in your lower abdomen, the muscles cramping. You wish it could be night already and he could be making you feel good again.

"We can't just stay in here all day," you say, much as you sort of want to. But you also don't want to waste a day of your time with all of your other friends. Yunho just groans, not wanting to agree with you but knowing you're right. He's just so asleep still, so in the haze of sleeping next to you. He really just wants to stay like this, forever.

"Okay, well, I really have to pee," you say, giggling, peeling yourself off of him. He lets out a small sound of disappointment but doesn't stop you. You turn around and see his tousled hair, his puffy, sleepy eyes. You lean down and place a quick kiss on his temple before making your way to the bathroom, another pad in hand.

The cramps hit you again when you're sat on the toilet, and you double over, feeling light-headed. It doesn't seem like you're bleeding quite as hard as yesterday but you still feel awful, despite all of the restful sleep you got. You gingerly clean yourself up, holding onto the counter as you stand, pausing for a moment so you don't pass out. You sigh, trying not to feel the frustration. But it's hard not to.

When you open the door you are met with Yunho, his messy hair now covered up by his hoodie, his eyes still very sleepy.

"Sorry for taking so long," you say, assuming he really needed to pee. You aren't paying attention, the cramps overwhelming you.

"Hey, look," he says as you start walking past. When you do finally look back you see that he's brought you pain meds and a glass of water. Your face softens immediately.

"Oh, thank you," you say, taking them immediately.

"Are they bad today?" he asks, a hand on your cheek. You just nod. "Go lay down then."

"I wanna hang out with everyone, though," you pout, looking at the floor.

"Well, go lay in the living room then," he suggests.

"Okay," you mumble, heading that way with your glass of water in hand. He watches you walk away, an obvious discomfort and weakness in your body, and it makes his chest hurt. When you were friends in high school he really only saw you on your good days, when you were feeling okay. It wasn't until living with you that he really saw the worst of everything, the truth of your health issues. You never spoke of them often, never truly explained it to him. Living together had forced you to, and when he showed himself to be genuinely good at caring for you, you'd let him in a bit more. He knew you didn't like the idea of people seeing you at your sickest. He never gave much thought to the idea when he was younger, that some people's bodies are wracked with issues from the start, that they never get to know what it's like to be able to rely on your body to carry you through everything. You were so young; though you were the same age as most of the rest of the friend group, you'd always been seen as the baby. He certainly always thought of you as small, in need of protection. He didn't want to tell you that, because he knew you'd hate the idea. It didn't help that you were smarter than most of them, when it came to the practical and academic aspects of life. You were far more mature in many ways. But they had the healthy bodies; they were the ones who were able to move out at eighteen, to become financially independent. It would take you many more years, and two very supportive friends to live with you, before you could move out.

When you make it to the living room you plop down next to Ari and San, snuggling under a blanket. The cabin was colder than you expected, the sky outside still dark.

"Has it been like that all morning?" you ask Ari, staring out the window.

"It was actually raining for a while earlier, it just stopped maybe thirty minutes ago."

"Oh really? No wonder I slept in so long," you reply, sighing into the warmth of your blanket.

"Are you doing okay?" she asks.

"Yeah, but I still feel like crap," you say, frowning. Sipping your water you try to relax, try to get your mind away from how terrible your lower abdomen feels.

"Do you need any pain meds?" she asks you, her face showing obvious concern. Even San is turned towards you and looking worried.

"No, no, I just took some. Thank you though," you respond, squeezing her hand. "I should probably eat something though, I'm starving."

"I think Seonghwa and Hongjoong are making some lunch, I'll go get you some," San replies, standing up.

"Oh, you don't have to," you start, taken aback by the kindness of this almost total stranger. But he walks that way anyway, not stopping at your words.

"He's so freaking nice, what the hell," you say to Ari.

"I know," she laughs, shaking her head. "I almost can't believe it's real sometimes."

"Men just aren't usually like that," you say, and right then Yunho crosses the room, making brief eye contact with you. He heads towards the kitchen, looking like his mind is set on something.

"The guys in our friend group are," she replies.

"Well, that's true. I guess I should say, straight men aren't usually like that, especially if they aren't romantically interested in you," you clarify. "At least not in my experience in the world, and I barely interact with men or go out in public."

"I know, the amount of horrifying behavior I saw at college is crazy. And even now still at my work. I know so many people tried to warn me to be careful around men when I was growing up, but I did not realize just how scary it would be to be in the adult world and have a uterus," she replies. She looks at you, earnestly; how nice it is to have another girl in your group, who understands what it is to exist in the world in your bodies.

"Uteruses should be banned," you say, placing a hand on your stomach. "This thing needs to get the hell out of my body."

Ari laughs, the bright sound raising your spirits. "I would have taken it out for you myself years ago, if I could," she laughs, resting her head on your shoulder.

"What just, reached up inside and like, pulled it out?" you laugh.

"Girl, your mind goes to the strangest places. Now I can't get that visual out of my head," she laughs, a hand coming to rest over her eyes.

"I wish I could do it myself," you reply, "just like-" you reach your hand down and spread your legs, miming the action; you both break into giggles.

"What was that?" Yunho asks as he sits down next to you, a cup of tea in hand. He holds it out towards you, careful to hand you the handle so you don't burn your hands.

"Y/n just being her usual self," Ari replied, still laughing. Yunho just looked confused, sipping at his own cup of coffee.

"I was showing her how I'd remove my uterus, if I could. I wish someone could just reach up in there and take it out," you clarify.

"You should make Yunho do it, he's got big hands," she says.

"Ari!" you shriek, crumpling into a heap of laughter with her. Yunho's ears go red, and he clears his throat to try to calm himself.

"You two are something else," he says, turning away, looking for anyone else to make conversation with.

"Wait, did Yunho make you that cup of tea?" Ari asked you, and at the mention of his name his attention stayed put.

"Yeah," you reply, not sure why she's interested. "He makes me and Hwa tea and coffee like all the time."

"That's sweet. See, we're so lucky to have these boys. He's the perfect example of a straight man who has no romantic interest in you, but still takes care of you."

You know she means it earnestly, from the way a small smile creeps onto her lips, making her eyes crinkle at the corners. But you and Yunho both stop dead in your tracks, your throats simultaneously going dry.

"Yeah, true," you say, trying to be normal. Like this morning, when Seonghwa found you in bed together. The words come out rough and you try to swallow, but it hurts and your eyes squeeze shut for a moment. You take another sip of your tea, trying to appear calm.

"What, Yunho, did I say something weird?" Ari asks, and you look over to see his stony face, his eyes looking almost distant. Something about it makes your heart drop for a moment, and you don't know why. Something in you begs for him to act normal too, but you realize there's no point. No point in pretending like nothing happened, even if you don't know what it means.

"I need to tell you something," you whisper to Ari, your face just inches from her ear. She leans even closer, clearly excited by your tone. You drop your volume even lower, putting your hand over your mouth to block the sound from going anywhere else. "Last night he like, fingered me."

"What?!" she asks in a whisper, her eyes going wide with excitement.

"Shh, please keep your face normal," you beg her, knowing that isn't possibly going to happen. But you don't want everyone to find out this very second, you'd like it to stay between the two of you. Ari does her best to still her face, knowing you don't want to draw attention. At least it's fairly normal, for the two of you to share secrets. The boys have always respected when you two say something is just for your ears.

"Yeah I was like, hurting last night and he like, made me feel better," you whisper, you both breaking out into giggles.

"Girl," she says, clearly wanting you to continue.

"I'll tell you everything once there's not like twenty people in the room with us," you say, a goofy smile not leaving your face.

"Aww," she says poking your cheek, and you swat her hand away, jokingly rolling your eyes. Ari keeps looking between the two of you, observing the way his body seems drawn towards you even as he sits a bit away, his legs stretching out to meet yours. She has so many questions, seeing as you'd never mentioned having a crush on him. His crush on you had been obvious to her for a while, but she'd never really mentioned it. It always seemed that people in the group had crushes from time to time, due to everyone's closeness. But sometimes they passed, sometimes they came to nothing; sometimes those crushes seemed like little more than someone mistaking their strong love and affection as something more. It was one of the reasons your group of friends had stayed close for so long; no one really forced closeness or forced information out of one another. Everyone let each other be, and let the cards fall where they may. Sometimes she felt like it made you less close than you could be. But she knew it also meant no one felt stepped on or smothered.

***

After lunch was served the weather had cleared a bit, and Jongho suggested that everyone play a game of basketball out on the small court to the south of the cabin. Not one of you had plans for the day, and with the way the weather was behaving that was definitely a good thing. You and Ari laid on the couch together, barely overhearing the conversation unfolding. You knew even if you wanted to you couldn't go and play, and the warmth of the couch was a lifesaver against the damp coolness in the air. The rain was not unusual for the time of year, but you swore it never had been this cold during your cabin trips.

"Will you stay inside with me?" you asked her.

"Of course. I wouldn't leave you alone in here. Also, I don't really feel like getting hurt today. You know how competitive they all get," she laughs, holding up her arm and showing you a large cut on the underside.

"My god, what's that from?" you ask.

"Wooyoung pushed me when we were playing waterpolo by the falls, and I scraped my arm on one of the rocks."

"Of course it was him," you chuckle, taking a closer look. "Did you wash it out yesterday?"

"It's not really that deep, but yeah. I'm sure it'll heal quick. I just really don't feel like playing basketball on a wet, slick court."

"And it's so cold, I don't know why they feel like going outside."

"It's not that cold," she says, looking at you confused.

"Wait, really?" you ask. She shakes her head. "Ok well for some reason, I'm freezing."

"One sec," she says, getting up and taking a blanket from the other side of the bed. "Y/n is cold," she says to the group, pointing to you all curled up in your one blanket. Everyone grabs their remaining blankets and one by one, layer them on you.

"This is too much," you whine, but you can't deny you like the attention. You really appreciate the way they all joke around with you; it always makes you feel better.

When all of the boys headed out to play, you finally got a chance to tell Ari everything.

"Your periods are still that bad?" Ari asks you when you tell her how you were feeling the previous night. "You hardly ever mention it anymore."

"It's just, so normal at this point. I guess. I don't know, you know it isn't fun to talk about. Plus this one really has been extra bad. I haven't had one this bad in a while," you respond.

"Well I'm glad he was there to comfort you. You know you could have told everyone how you were feeling yesterday. You didn't have to pretend like you were fine at dinner."

"I don't know, Wooyoung's cousins are here and so is San, I don't really know any of them," you say.

"Let me assure you, San would not care. And I doubt Woo's cousins would either, I mean we've been around them before, they seem very kind. He wouldn't bring them around you if he thought they'd be weird about something as simple as that. I know Woo acts like he doesn't give a shit about anything, but he really cares about you. I overheard him asking Seonghwa this morning how you've been doing," she replies. You look at her tenderly, thankful she shared it with you. As much as you wish Wooyoung would just ask you, you know it's not his way. It warms your heart to know he cares.

"So, how long have you liked Yunho then?" she asks you.

"Dude, I literally don't know. I don't even know what I feel right now," you sigh, shaking your head at her. "I mean, he was really just helping ease my cramps, cause I basically begged him too. And I get fucking horny on my period, I don't know." You put your head in your hands. "I don't even know what words were coming out of my mouth last night."

"So is it just a sexual thing then?" she asks.

"I'm assuming that's how he feels, I mean he's never said anything to the contrary."

"No, I mean for you," she clarifies.

"I.. I don't know. I don't hook up with people, and he's like, one of my best friends, I-" you cut yourself off with a groan, head spinning. "I'm gonna develop feeling for him and he's not gonna feel the same and we live together and it's gonna be a fucking mess," you blurt out, your mind racing out of control.

"Y/n, that man loves you," Ari says, squeezing your shoulder.

"I know Ari, I'm not saying he'd be an asshole about it. But it would still be so awkward for me, and if you love someone platonically that doesn't just change overni-"

"No, he's in love with you," she cuts you off.

"He's said those words to you?" you ask her, incredulous.

"No, but it's obvious to anyone with eyes," she says. You squint questioningly in her direction, feeling like she's just saying what she thinks you want to hear. "Dude I'm serious, Seonghwa has told me about it, the way he is around you. If he's not in love with you then I don't know what it could be."

"He's dated like multiple people since we've known him though, that doesn't make sense," you reply.

"Not since moving in with you," she says. "Has he ever brought any girls over to hang out with? Or to hook up?"

"No," you say, head still spinning.

"That's not because of like, a house rule or something, right?"

"No, we talked about it, we're all okay with bringing people over. Hwa brings over guys sometimes. Well he did when we first moved in, not really this past year."

"But Yunho never has?" she asks again.

You shake your head. "That doesn't mean anything, Ari. He's barely even spoken to me this morning, anyway. He doesn't seem like he's in love. Seems like normal Yunho to me."

"He brought you tea," she says, smirking.

"Oh my god, he always does that," you say, rolling your eyes and also smiling. "I- I don't know how to feel."

"Would you do it again?" she asks. You nod. "Do you like, really really want to do it again?" she continues, making you laugh.

"Yeah," you say, hiding your face in your hands.

"Well, at least you know that. Don't stress about it," she says. "It can just be a fun little thing, it doesn't have to be life changing."

You sigh, soaking in her words. You know what she's saying is absolutely right; it's the kind of advice you'd probably be giving her if the tables were turned. But something about your night with Yunho meaning so little doesn't sit right with you.

"Can you please not tell anyone, not even San? For right now, I don't know what Yunho wants to say," you plead.

"Of course, you don't have to worry about that. I don't share things with San just cause he's my boyfriend, I don't think that's fair to my friends," she responds, hugging you.

"I'm so thankful you're here," you say, sighing comfortingly into her embrace.

"Me too. I love them all but they can be a lot," she says, and you both chuckle. Tucked into your layers of blankets you feel warm and cozy, and your chest feels lighter having told someone about your previous night.

***

Close to 3pm, the storm rolls back in to the area; the winds pick up, the clouds darken, and suddenly rain is pouring down. It sounds like the roof of the cabin is being repeatedly pelted with golfballs, the dull sound surprisingly loud. Suddenly all of the boys are sprinting back inside, their wet shoes squeaking on the tile of the kitchen floor. All of them are thoroughly soaked, their hair sticking to their foreheads, clothes stuck to their bodies. They tumble in one after the other, Wooyoung the last to make it in, and you hear his scream all the way from outside. When they finally get inside they all start undressing, their clothes heavy and cold.

"Didn't realize we were staying at a strip club," Ari says, making you laugh. You know they're just uncomfortable, but you can't help but stare at Yunho as he disrobes, his light blue shirt dripping on him as he heaves it over his head. You don't really see him shirtless like this, even though you live together. He's not one for walking around like that. You'd forgotten how broad he really was, how strong his shoulders are. As he goes to ring out his shirt in the sink you see his tricep flex, and the smooth muscles of his back as well. He's tall and lanky, but you'd forgotten just how muscular he was too.

"You're kind of gawking, just so you know," Ari whispers in your ear, making you jump.

"Oh my god, I'm gross," you groan, burrowing your head in her shoulder.

"No not gross, not gross at all. Fuck, every time San is shirtless I want him to fuck me immediately." You glance over at Ari's boyfriend, already anticipating the muscles you're about to see. You could tell even when he was clothed how built he was.

"How often is at the gym?" you ask.

"Basically every day. He can like, easily pick me up and throw me around. And I'm not exactly the lightest person in the world."

"If that's not everyone's dream," you say, giggling.

"Can't Yunho carry you?" she asks.

"Yeah but I'm basically like a sickly little worm, it's not that hard. Even Hwa can lift me," you laugh,

"Okay, well, he can still lift you. And how big is your height difference?"

You just smile at her question, knowing you are blushing.

"God, if we aren't the most simple of women," she laughs.

"No no, I'll have you know I'm very full of logic and feminism and I do not care about muscles, or height, or anything of the sort. Never in my wildest dreams have I thought about how tall he is in comparison to me and gotten all hot and bothered about it," you joke, your blush having moved to your cheeks too.

"So you have thought about him like that!" she exclaims.

"Keep it down!" you chide, when you see Seonghwa shoot a look over at the two of you.

"Sorry, sorry," she laughs, pouting at you. "What are you looking at?" she says to Seonghwa, who rolls his eyes.

***

After the boys had changed and dried off, Wooyoung insisted that everyone watched a scary movie. You were all stuck inside, and everyone had already spent the morning talking and catching up.

"'It matches the vibe of the storm," he said. "It'll be so fun," he laughed, smirking in your direction. He knew how you couldn't handle jump scares and didn't like gore. He promised you the movie he'd selected didn't have either.

"It's more like, a psychological thriller, you know? It's really fun. Set in a cabin in the woods too."

"Okay, fine," you replied, hoping he was telling the truth.

He was, in fact, lying. You found that out about twenty minutes later.

The loud bang made you jump, causing you to launch sideways and grab onto the closest thing to you. It happened to be Yunho's arm.

When everyone sat down, Yunho sat himself right next to you, but didn't say a word. Everyone was chatting, the room filled with chaos as they came down from the adrenaline rush the storm had caused. Ari got up to sit with San and help him dry off, and when Yunho saw you sitting alone he was almost thankful. He didn't know why, but everything Ari had said earlier made him feel almost jumpy. He had seen the two of you giggling and whispering to each other, and felt like something was happening that he didn't understand. When he approached you your face looked distant, and he almost worried you didn't want him there, that you would have preferred her. He sat with his arm around the back of the couch behind you. But when you didn't lean into him at all, didn't seem comfortable with it, he pulled it back down to his side.

"Woo, you promised me!" you whisper yelled after you jumped, your grip on Yunho so strong it almost hurt. You felt so embarrassed at how easily scared you were.

"That wasn't even a jump scare, just a loud sound," Yunho said, and the room chuckled. You frowned, pulling yourself away from him. You weren't sure why you were so sensitive, but what he said made you feel small. And not in a good way.

Everyone else's attention was back on the movie in a second, but Yunho couldn't stop looking at you and your sullen face.

"Hey, I'm sorry," he whispered, leaning ever so slightly towards you. "Come here," he said, moving his arm around your shoulders this time, gently pulling you towards him. You stuffed your head into his chest, suddenly feeling overwhelmed. You weren't sure if you even wanted his comfort. You completely tuned out the movie, closing your eyes. You mind raced with thoughts from the day, and you suddenly realized you hadn't had a chance to talk to Seonghwa. You had wanted to assure him of what was happening, because he lived with you both. You didn't want him worried that you and Yunho had been keeping something from him, sneaking around behind his back. But as you peaked around the room to find his face, you didn't see him anywhere. You felt confused, and exhausted, and suddenly realized how cold you were again. You tried to tuck yourself into the blankets more but it just wasn't enough, so finally you decided to go grab Yunho's hoodie from the library. Maybe one more layer would help.

You slowly crawl your way out of the room, careful not to block anyone's view of the TV. When you finally stand up you're at the edge of the very short hallway that leads to the library. As you stand you notice how dark the sky looks. This window faces out towards the fire pit, and sits where the cabin is directly under a few trees and your view is limited. Still, the view is beautiful. The rain has become more gentle now, and the soft sound soothes you as you look out across the land splattered with greenery. The plants, the trees, they're the reason you really like being out here. You hope that today's the last day you'll have to spend inside, nursing your body. Some movement in your periferral vision catches your eye, and you sweep your gaze back towards the fire pit and the ring of trees that surrounds it. Suddenly you realize why you couldn't find Seonghwa earlier.

Outside, on a lounging chair just to the left of the fire pit, Seonghwa and Hongjoong are kissing. They must have snuck out while the rest of you were occupied with the movie, you realize. You aren't sure how you missed them at first, but in the darkness of the storm and shadow of the trees they almost blended into the landscape. Seonghwa is sat against he back of the chair and Hongjoong is over him, a hand on Seonghwa's thigh. You see him move that hand to pull on Seonghwa's silky black hair, the kiss clearly passionate, heated. The rain patters down around them, but in the cover of the trees they don't look soaked. They certainly don't look bothered. You can't tell, really, from this far away. You shouldn't be trying to look that hard, anyway. You try to tell yourself that. But you're mesmerized, stuck to the spot. You feel overcome with how beautiful they both are.

Soon they're tugging at each other's shirts, and you can tell now from the way they take them off that they must pretty damp. In the struggle you see Hongjoong's muscular back and arms; Seonghwa's face is the picture of lust, his hands moving down quickly to reach inside Hongjoong's pants and start stroking him. They're kissing again, Seonghwa's lean chest heaving, Hongjoong grabbing his legs to wrap them around himself. Tangled together they look like a perfectly choreographed ballet, like they both know exactly where the other is headed. You see Hongjoong's hips start to buck, his mouth moving down to Seonghwa's ear, then neck, his iron grip on Seonghwa's thigh leaving a mark you can see all the way from the window. Seeing the red mark brings a heat to your cheeks; the image of your porcelain doll of a friend being marked up by such a muscular man is not something you thought you'd ever witness. Now that you have, you can't help but think they're perfect together. Suddenly Hongjoong is sitting back, his hands pulling on the band of Seonghwa's shorts and throwing them aside, and you see how hard Seonghwa is, his movements showing how obviously needy he is.

Fuck, I really should stop watching them, you think. You'd seen them both naked before, it's not like your friend group was uncomfortable with much. But this was obviously different, and the way your body was feeling while you witnessed it made you feel a confused and a little guilty. Still, you could not pull yourself away, as you saw Hongjoong lean down over Seonghwa and say something, and Seonghwa's lips curl up in a smile, his head turning to the side as he grabbed onto Hongjoong's arm. They looked so, so in love. With Seonghwa's legs spread Hongjoong reached down, his hand moving between his cheeks, moving in a way you could not make out from your distance. Seonghwa's head fell back in obvious pleasure, and his back arched slightly showing off his lean abdomen. Hongjoong moved his head down to suck on one of his nipples, making Hwa's back arch even further and his mouth fall open. He looked so completely content in such a vulnerable state, and it made your heart ache with happiness. In all of the conversations you'd had with him over the years, you knew he always felt so self-conscious in these situations. It was always shocking to you, given just how beautiful he was. He got propositioned out in public more than anyone in your group, and had to continually turn people down given the industry he worked in. But all of that attention felt uncomfortable to him, usually, and you knew that. To see him so unabashedly open with someone was a rare sight.

Hongjoong's hand moves up and then you see, a tiny glint of something metal in his hand. It must have been a plug Seonghwa had inside himself already. When had he put that in? It must have been after the game, so before the movie? When did he even have the time? You can't stop watching the way Hongjoong lines himself up, stroking a hand through Seonghwa's hair again, finally pushing himself in ever so slowly. The plug sits next to them on the lounging chair, and you swear the gem on the end twinkles at you. He starts thrusting slowly, kissing Seonghwa's cheek, the rain starting to pick up again. It all feels so cinematic, like it couldn't have been more perf-

"What are you looking at?" Yunho whispers into your ear, sliding up behind you. You jump, spinning away from the window and covering your eyes, your elbow hitting him in the ribs.

"Oh god, ow," he says, grabbing his side.

"You scared me," you pout, your head feeling full of molasses from all of the feelings you are having.

"I whispered," he replied. "Why are you so jumpy, are you okay? Why did you you leave the couch?"

"I was cold, I was gonna grab your hoodie. But then, the window, you know, it was pretty outside with the storm and stuff," you reply, averting your eyes.

"Seems like my hoodie is in danger of being re-homed," he replies. He's trying to joke around to lighten your mood, which is obviously not good at the moment. Your eyes on the floor make him worried, and you really don't seem yourself. Or rather, you seem like how you are when you aren't feeling well.

"Here, why don't we look out the window together?" he offers, turning you around to face it again, wrapping his arms around you to try to help you feel warm.

"Oh god, Yunho, no," you mumble as he turns you, and you start stepping out of his reach, mortified at what he's about to see. You feel his arms stretch out and his body begin to move with you, but then he halts.

"Oh, that's what you were looking at," he laughs under his breath, making you cringe. You hope he leaves it at that, that he doesn't say anything else. But soon he opens his mouth again. "Oh god, that's crazy," he says, and you look back to see his eyes wide and mouth hanging open. He looks almost horrified, and you wonder for a moment if he's even seeing what you think he's seeing, or if it's something else entirely. With a confused look on your face you scoot towards the window again, to catch a glimpse of whatever has him so shocked.

As soon as your eye line reaches Seonghwa and Hongjoong you too feel a shock, at just how hard Hongjoong is thrusting into him now, his hand on Seonghwa's neck. No longer do the two look like a balletic couple; instead one has clearly submitted to the other. You know from conversations with him that Seonghwa likes being taken like this, or at least has always liked the idea of it. He'd told you many times how he'd never really had any partners he trusted enough to go there with, but that he wished he could. You feel strangely proud of him, as you realize he'd had to have a difficult conversation with Hongjoong to make this happen.

"Yunho, stop," you say, tugging on his arm to pull him into the library with you.

"You saw what I saw, right?" he asks, his voice still low but sounding mildly concerned.

"Yeah, why?" you ask, seeing his hoodie on the corner of the pull out couch and making a bee line for it.

"You just, don't seem concerned," he says.

"Why would I be concerned?" you ask, your eyebrows knitted together. You really don't know why he'd have a problem with the two of them being together, but suddenly you worry there's something about Yunho that you didn't know.

"Hongjoong was being so aggressive with him," he says, voice even softer.

"Oh, Yunho, he-" you cut yourself off, not wanting to overshare. You're so thankful he doesn't have a problem with them for any other reason. "It's not really my place to share but, let's just say I know he likes that. I'm sure he asked for it."

"Well, I guess that makes a lot of sense," he laughs, his relief palpable. You cock your head to the side, looking confused. "Oh you know what I mean," he continues. "Hwa is so professional, pretty, put together all the time. Of course he likes being taken like a whore."

"Yunho, what the fuck," you say, shoving your face in his hoodie to try to cover up your laugh. You can't help finding what he said hilarious, and his read of Seonghwa is completely spot on. But you can't believe the words actually left his lips. "How can you say that about him?"

"You're the one who was standing and watching them for what, five whole minutes? I waited a while to come and check on you," he says, staring you down as you finally put on his hoodie, your hair a mess under the hood.

"God, please don't tell anyone," you groan into your hands. "It's weird, I know, I'm sorry. I just, they seem very compatible, and I'm happy Hwa has found someone like that. I don't know."

"It's not weird, I know you like watching that kind of stuff," he replies.

"I do not, what are you talking about?" you reply, your cheeks feeling warm again.

"Ok I know it's only one example, but remember our school trip senior year? When those people in the hotel across the street were fucking and they left their curtains wide open? You couldn't stop staring."

"I'm never living that down," you sigh.

"There's nothing wrong with doing that, at least I don't think so. If people are fucking in public then they know someone might see. They probably even like the idea," he says, chuckling.

"I'm not a big pervert who reads smut all the time and likes watching people fuck," you pout, hitting him on the arm.

"I know," he murmurs, pulling you into a hug. "I'd still love you if you were, though."

Love. Your heart stops at the word for a moment, and you don't know why. You'd said it to each other thousands, probably tens of thousands of times in the ten years you'd known him. But now it's making you feel like your heart has fallen into your stomach, and you might puke it up. You sag against Yunho, pains wracking through you again. You almost feel relief, at realizing the feeling was just your cramps.

"I don't feel good," you groan into his chest.

"I know, I could tell," he says, rubbing a hand along your back.

"How?" you ask, tensing in anticipation of his answer.

"Cause you're being kind of weird with me today," he sighs out, hugging you even more tightly.

"I'm sorry," you say, having known it would be his answer. It was the thing him and Seonghwa had helped you realize; no matter how much you could hide the physical symptoms of anything, the changes in your personality were always there when you weren't feeling well. And those two, knowing you as well as they did, always picked up on it.

"Do you want to go back out there? Or stay in here?" he asks you.

"I just want to lay in here for a bit, by myself," you say, not wanting to expose him any longer to your sour mood. "I'll come out for dinner, can you let me know when everyone's eating?"

"Of course," he says, lifting you up and placing you on your bed. In the comfort of the library everything feels so intimate, and you tug him down to come lay with you too, for just a second. Wrapped around each other you both sigh, Yunho nuzzling his face into your neck and leaving a gentle kiss. He feels overcome with concern, his heart wanting to stay next to you like this, forever. But you'd said you wanted to lay by yourself. He pulls himself up, tightening the strings of his hoodie slightly and pulling your blanket over your shoulders. As he leaves he walks gently, trying not to make any sound. In the hallway he glances briefly out the window, to see Seonghwa smiling, him and Hongjoong cuddled up together in a gentle embrace.

***

Dinner passes in a blur, your entire body feeling achey and your head starting to hurt. You'd taken your pills, drank water; there was nothing else you could do. When Yunho came to get you you'd almost declined, almost asked him to bring you food in bed. Your bleeding was definitely slowing down, but your body was feeling weaker today, and your mind was all over the place. Throughout dinner you felt like you might start crying at the smallest thing, and you clung onto Seonghwa to keep yourself from doing so. Everyone could tell you weren't feeling well, Yunho and Seonghwa rubbing your back as you sat cross legged at the large coffee table in the living room, slowly sipping at your soup. When Wooyoung brought you the bowl he had leaned down to hug you, seeing just how out of it you were.

"You don't have to stay out here with us if you don't feel well," Seonghwa said, running his hand through your hair. You leaned against him, slowly blinking to try and calm yourself.

"I don't think I can walk right now," you said, your legs hurting terribly.

"I can carry you," Yunho piped up, downing his last bite of food. "Do you want to go lay down again?"

You nodded your head, the light in the room feeling too bright despite how dim it was. You bring your hands up to cover your eyes.

"Ok, let me clean up our dishes and I'll take you to your bed," he said, standing up with your bowl and his plate in hand. When he returned he gently grabbed your hands, moving them around to the back of his neck, and then moving your legs out in front of you, scooped you up in one fluid motion. You rest your head on his chest, burying your face into his hoodie that you're still wearing.

"Feel better, we love you," Ari said, a twinkle in her eye as she watched Yunho carrying you from the room.

"I love you too," you respond weakly. You feel yourself fading, but suddenly your teeth feel too gross to sleep. "Wait, I need to brush my teeth," you tell Yunho, groaning in frustration.

"Okay, no worries," he says, his voice gentle. He walks you to the bathroom and sets you down on the toilet seat, prepping your toothbrush for you, then helps you stand to spit everything out when you're done. "Wait, I need to pee," you say, holding onto his arm tightly. He helps you sit down again, helps take off your pants and panties. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry you have to help me like this," you say, your words nearly slurring together. You're really sounding out of it, and he feels himself in that space he gets in, when you're so broken down and he's the one there to comfort you.

"Shh, it's okay," he says, brushing a tear that fell down your cheek.

"No it's not, I'm a fucking mess," you continue, more tears starting to fall. "Why can't I figure out my damn body, why does it always catch me so off guard? It must be so weird living with me," you cry, everything tumbling out in waves.

"Y/n, listen to me. Everything is okay, I'm gonna get you to bed and you'll feel better tomorrow, I promise. You are not weird to live with, you're wonderful to live with. Are you hearing me?" he asks, moving your face up to make eye contact with him. "How did I get so lucky to know you?"

His kind words only make you cry harder, and you can't stop even as you get up from the toilet and try to steady yourself. He opens the door and picks you up again, carrying you finally to your bed to lay down. In bed your body feels heavy, like you're made of lead. You haven't felt this tired in a while, and you think sleep might envelop you immediately. But the pain radiating down your thighs and up through your stomach is too bad, and you toss and turn, unable to relax as Yunho readies himself for bed.

"Y/n, what do you need?" he asks, seeing your constant movements and pained expression.

"My legs to stop hurting," you mumble. Without even opening your eyes you raise your arms out to grab at him, even though he isn't right there. Your body is moving desperately again, and something about being with him in this room makes you loose all inhibitions. "Please make them stop hurting Yuyu," you plead.

"What would help, baby?" he asks, his body feeling electric. He moves over so you can grab him; he'll follow any request you have, do anything for you.

"Touch me, again, please," you beg, your thighs and pussy aching. Yunho again grabs a towel for you, gently placing it down on your bed and smoothing it out, lifting your hips to move you onto it. You keep making little sounds of desperation, unable to stop yourself. 'I know, I know, just relax baby,' he whispers to you, watching the way your face softens at the pet name. Soon your lower half is entirely naked, and he's massaging your legs, gently brushing past your cunt a few times, making you mewl from neediness. He wants to make you feel better but he also likes seeing you like this, likes hearing you beg for him. He wasn't prepared last night for what it did to him, and he thinks he's probably already addicted to that feeling.

Finally he slowly pushes a finger in, making you moan and sigh, the relief instant. Your reaching out to pull at his face, pulling him in to kiss him hard, your breath mixing as you open your mouth to slide your tongue across his. You moan at the feeling, his tongue wet and hot, making your clit throb. 'More,' you plead, your body feeling even more opened up than the previous night, even more ready to take everything he can give. He slowly adds a second digit, not wanting to hurt you, but he can tell your desperation is high and you're needing to be well and truly fucked. 'More, more,' you almost cry, your cunt clenching hard onto his long fingers, your hips rocking to match his movements. He inserts another finger, moving slowly again as to not hurt you. Desperately you claw at his back, hands reaching underneath his shirt, leaving marks in their wake. Yunho groans at the feeling, his own cock throbbing at how needy and wet you are. 'Faster, please,' you beg. The little sounds you let out are making him harder and harder; he starts rubbing himself against your leg as he fucks you with his fingers, his cock so hard it's starting to feel like torture.

"More, please Yuyu," you beg again, tears forming in your eyes from how good it all feels.

"More fingers? You feel so tight baby," he asks you, barely able to move his hand with how hard you're clenching down on him.

"No, need you inside me," you babble, feeling how hard he is against your leg. Yunho slows his movements a bit, propping himself up on his elbow to talk to you. He wants nothing more than to fuck you right then, but there's just one problem.

"Baby, I didn't bring any condoms with me," he huffs out, his frustration obvious.

"You should have," you whine, turning your face away from him but still moving your hips against his hand.

"How was I supposed to know this was gonna happen?" he asks, laughing.

You just whine again, eyes even more teary now at the thought that you might not get what you want, and you move your hands up to cover your face. Yunho stops his movements when he sees your disappointed face, sitting himself up to look down at you. He takes his free hand and gently brushes a hair out of your face.

"You really need me to fuck you right now?" he asks, earnestly. You nod your head, looking at him through the gaps between your fingers, your lips in a pout. Yunho groans and throws his head back, your sweet and needy face making him want to do every dirty thing he can think of. "Okay, I'll be right back," he says, slowly pulling out of you. You whine in disappointment, your pussy feeling devastatingly empty. "Just sit tight for a few minutes, I'll be right back," he says, kissing your forehead.

After cleaning off his hand Yunho walks through the cabin, trying hard to go unnoticed as he passes through the living room to the master bedroom. Everyone still seems to be awake except Hongjoong and Seonghwa who lay cuddled on a couch together; Wooyoung and his cousin Yeosang are playing what appears to be a very heated card game of some kind, while the other boys watch or scroll their phones, everyone clearly winding down for the night. He's thankful to not see Ari or San present; they must be in their bedroom as he'd hoped. His heart races from how potentially awkward this interaction could be, but he feels like he's on autopilot and there's no possibility of turning back. Not when you had begged him like that, and looked at him the way you did. There was no way he wouldn't find some sort of solution to his problem.

He knocks on the door gently, hoping he's not disturbing a private moment between the two.

"Yeah?" he hears Ari ask, sounding sleepy.

"It's Yunho, can I come in for just a sec?" he asks, trying to sound casual. He doesn't want to raise any alarm bells for them, or for any of the boys in the living room who might be overhearing. And if it had just been Ari, or one of the other friends he'd known for so long it might not feel too awkward. But there are three new people on the trip this year, and he isn't sure how comfortable they would be.

"Yeah, come in," she responds. Yunho turns the door handle slowly, hoping to avoid making any loud noise. Slowly pushing open the door, he spots San in the chair in the corner, reading over something on his laptop in front of him.

"Hey, sorry this is, well, random. Do you guys happen to have a, uh, condom I could borrow?" he spits it out, not wanting to waste a second.

"Oh, yeah, uh, let me see what I've got," San replies, closing his laptop and setting it on the bed before unzipping a small pocket in his suitcase. "Here just take this box, I brought two with me," he responds.

"Are you sure?" Yunho asks. He's frankly taken aback by how casual San is being about this, and by his generosity on top of it all.

"Yeah, of course. I've got plenty and I'm glad you're asking. It's always better to be safe," he responds, a genuine smile on his face.

"Be careful with her," Ari adds, unable to stop herself. "She's very fragile."

"I'm not going to hurt her, you know that," he replies, looking at her almost coldly. He feels slightly offended at the idea that she thinks it's a possibility, after all of the years she'd known him, seen him taking care of you.

"I know. I just had to say it, she needs all the protecting she can get," she says, remembering the state you were in during dinner. "I'm sorry if that was rude. I'm- I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to ask us," she finishes, hoping she didn't cross some sort of line with him.

"She's very capable of asking for what she needs," Yunho replies, wanting to stick up for you. But his face is soft, he isn't mad.

"Which is, that?" Ari gestures at the box of condoms in his hand, trying to hold back laughter.

"Okay, that's enough," Yunho laughs, looking away from her towards the door. "Thank you both, sorry if I made that weird."

Out the door he makes his way through the living room, trying to hide the box under the hem of his shirt. Mingi is the only one who glances up to see him, registering the shape of the box underneath the fabric. He's pretty sure he knows what it is, and he smirks to himself, too tired to say anything about it. But he's happy his friend is finally getting what he's wanted.

"I'm back," Yunho whispers when he reenters the room, your face and body awash in the gentle white light from the moon. He makes quick work of opening the box, removing one condom and throwing it on the bed. In a second he's on you, peppering your face with kisses, moving his hands underneath your shirt to pull it off.

"I'm so bloated," you say, breathless.

"I need to see you," he responds, not giving you any room to keep talking about yourself that way. You tug on his shirt as well and he reaches up, pulling it off and throwing it on the floor. In the moonlight he looks pale, his long torso perfectly shaped and beautifully lean. You bring a hand up to stroke along his stomach, feeling the strong muscles underneath his skin, brushing across a small happy trail going down from his belly button into his pants. You tug on his pants too, your neediness having only grown in the few minutes he was gone. The idea of laying stark naked in front of anyone, especially in your bloated, sickly state would normally make you shudder, but in this moment you feel free, ready to take anything. He moves down to kiss you again, passionately, his tongue forcing you to open your mouth wide, his hands possessively grabbing you. Him kissing down your neck has you moaning, nearly writhing underneath him. He moves up to whisper to you, biting your earlobe gently and making you moan louder.

"You're so perfect," he whispers, the words cascading down you like a soft warm rain, any worry you had completely melting away. You tug at his pants again, helping him move them down and finally, completely off. Quickly he rolls on the condom; carefully he lines himself up with your entrance, moving his stiff cock up and down your slit, already feeling how warm and wet and ready you are. Finally he presses in, achingly slowly, until he's fully seated inside of you, the muscles of your cunt being deliciously stretched in a way they never have before.

He's big to be sure, clearly just the perfect size, stretching you just the way your body needed. Slowly he pulls out, then soothingly pushes himself back in, his cock hitting every perfect place inside you. Your mouth falls open at the feeling; you've never felt so full, so complete. He moves a hand down to your hip, anchoring himself so he can start a slow rhythm, his head buzzing with how good it all feels.

"Baby, you're so tight, fuck," he says as he tries to find a consistent pace. "Does that feel good?" he asks, eyes not leaving your face.

"Yes, yes, fuck, Yunho," you mumble, not able to form a coherent sentence.

"Relax for me then, you're so tight I can barely move," he says, trying to find the perfect angle to make your body completely give in. Quickly he readjusts himself, moving his knee to lower his angle, adding more strength to his movement. You moan, clearly feeling even better than before, so he knows he needs to lower the angle even more. "Baby, lift your hips for me," he says, grabbing a pillow from beside you to move underneath your lower back. Once you're situated he kisses you again, acutely aware of just how surrendered you are to him, words no longer forming on your lips. Slowly he adjusts his knee again, his hand still on your hip anchoring you, and he begins fucking you again from his new angle.

The immense pleasure is immediate, your back arching and your head rolling back, your moans so loud you're probably being heard throughout the rest of the cabin. But Yunho doesn't care, he's not thinking about that. All he's thinking about is the way he feels your pussy pull him in even more, your hips and thighs finally relaxing some, your whole body reacting to his change in movement.

"Shit, there you go," he praises you, feeling your legs wrap around his back, pulling him in. He's been so careful with you, so focused on not hurting you, but he can tell you need more, so he starts fucking you harder, his face nuzzling in your hair to take in everything he loves about you. He can feel the muscles of your pussy start to clench again, but it's different this time; the flutter against his cock drives him crazy, making him thrust into you even harder. Soon he feels the muscles clenching hard, your moans reaching their peak, your hands a vice grip on his arm and back.

"Good girl, let yourself come," he coos, holding you as close to him as he can, kissing your cheek and nose. It's the most heated moment, he feels himself about to come undone too, but suddenly he's overcome with fondness, a warmth flowing through his chest, making him feel emotional.

"Fuck, I love you." The words tumble out of him without warning and your own chest warms, just as your orgasm starts blooming through you, your legs shaking as Yunho continues to fuck you. You're moaning and mewling, unable to say a single actual word, but you wish you could tell him just how perfect everything is, how you haven't came like that, ever. In the heat of the moment everything felt right, and to hear him say something so sweet just as you reached your climax made it all feel even better. His tight grip on you, the way he's nuzzled into your body, it makes you feel safe and grounded and so fucking horny.

Yunho comes just after you do, his thrusts becoming inconsistent, his body going taught and then absolutely limp on top of you. You both breath deeply, your chests heaving in the quiet coolness of the room. You wish you could bottle this feeling, the way your body is limp and buzzing with pleasure, his weight on top of you making your usually busy brain filled with nothing but the feeling of him. It feels peaceful, almost spiritual. You both rest for a few minutes, not moving a muscle, except when Yunho reaches over finally to kiss you again, making you giggle.

"How are you feeling?' he asks, still not daring to move.

"So good," you slur out, a dopey smile spreading across your face.

"Good," he replies, wrapping himself around you like he loves to do. "Can I pull out of you?" he asks.

"Mhmm," you respond, moving your legs to allow him to move. He cleans you up and helps you redress, stopping every few seconds to kiss you again, tickling you too when he realizes you're in the mood for it. It takes a while for you to come back to yourself, your mind so foggy from everything that had happened. But finally, once he'd gotten you both totally ready for sleep and wrapped himself up behind you, you found you could actually speak.

"I love you too," you whisper, squeezing his hand that rests on your belly. He just cuddles you closer, letting out a huge sigh of relief.

[catssluvr]

𝓭𝓻𝓾𝓷𝓴 𝓲𝓷 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮, emily prentiss

s16/17!emily prentiss x fem!reader

you drunk call emily

warnings: r being suggestive, r is wipped lol, so much fluff 🤍

·˚ ༘₊·꒰➳: ̗̀➛

Emily rubbed her temples with the pads of her fingers, the computer screen in front of her making her eyes sting from the brightness. Working for the FBI was never easy but being unit chef felt like an impossible task sometimes. She hadn´t even noticed everyone leave the office at some point and the way it was pitch black outside, the clock hitting midnight.

The sudden buzz of her phone made her let out a frustrated sigh, but soon her expression turned smiley as she saw the familiar picture of you snuggling sergio against your cheek pop up on her screen. You had went out for a girls night with Pen and JJ at the bar so she could imagine that by now you were probably tipsy - if not slightly more than that. She had been tempted to join you two, especially with you looking at her with puppy dog eyes while begging her to go but she didn´t have other choice but to decline it.

Picking up the device, she quickly answered the call with a sweet, "Hey angel, what's up?" Not missing the way your drunk giggles sounded immediately after.

"Ems, hi!" You said, making an effort to sound composed but failing miserably. "I miss you sooo much." You stated between giggles and Emily could hear Garcia´s voice teasing you for being so lovey.

"Yeah, love?" She mumbled softly, still trying to figure out the reason behind this random call but having a light guess.

"Mhm, so much 'Mily." Your words were slured and she had to hold the urge to chuckle at the state you were currently in.

"Well, i miss you too. Are you okay? Do you need anything?" She asked, pressing the phone against her ear and supporting it her shoulder as she closed her laptop.

"Uhmm.." Your voice showed confusion before JJ whispered something to you, what Emily assumed was her reminding you of the reason behind the call. "Oh- right! Could you please pick me up? I know you're working- i'm so sorry-"

"I'll be on my way, angel. Stay right where you are, kay?" She interrupted your rambling before you could continue, keeping her voice as soft as possible. She did have work to do, but truth is you were way more important than all that. And she already felt bad enough for turning you down earlier.

"Kay Ems.. love you." You whispered with a hiccup.

"I love you, now stay close to Garcia and JJ and i'll be there in no time." She said before hanging up and quickly gathering her things before leaving the office.

·˚ ༘₊·꒰➳: ̗̀➛

You huffed grumply, sleepines hitting you as you burried your face in Penelope's shoulder. Your mind was hazy, only thing in your mind being Emily as you waited for her outside the bar. Even if the alcohol in your blood was making everything feel more dramatic than it was, you did miss her.

"Don't worry peach, she'll be here soon." Pen comforted you, runing a hand through your hair with her colorful nails.

You sniffled softly, the booze and sleepiness making you overly emotional. But before the tears started breaming in your eyes, you catched the glimpse of the gray haired woman walking out of her car and walk towards you.

"Ems! You're heree-" You ran to hug her, fingers grabing her long coat and nose nuzzling her neck and collarbone. "You smell so so good, always do." You mumbled innocently, ignoring the two girls standing right there and focusing on the way Emily's chest moved as she chuckled at your clinginess.

"Hello to you too, angel. Ready to go?" Her hands gently tucked the strands of hair that fell on your face behind your ears, giving you a pleased smile when you nod. "You two need a ride home?" She asked the two girls standing in front of you.

"Nah we´re okay, just felt like a good idea to call you to come and get your lighthead girlfriend." JJ chuckled and Penelope soon followed, quickly sending you goodbyes before disappearing into the bar again.

"Weirdos." Emily snorted with a smile before her atention returned to you. You were currently pressed up against her, your arms had sneaked their way inside her coat in attempt to warm yourself up from the chilly weater of the night.

"C'mon sweetheart, let's get you inside the car so you can warm up." She pulled you with her as you both started walking towards the car, struggling slightly as you were holding onto her arm like a koala.

"You're so pretty Ems, did ya know?" You pressed pecks to her jaw as you spoke, cheeks pink from the booze. Your gestures were no suprise to her, you tended to get overly affectionate when drunk. "I love eyes and your cute lips..." You went on as you pressed kisses against her cheek and the corner of her lips.

"Yeah? What else?" She urged you to continue, her voice humurous as you approached the car.

"Oh- your hair, love your hair. Looks so good like this." Your fingers clumsly played with her silver hair, lovingly gazing at her. Emily knew exactly what you meant by this, she had been reluctant to embrace the natural color of it but now she wouldn't even think of painting it again, not after the way you looked at her.

She guided you inside the car, gently kissing your forehead as she buckled your seatbelt. "Ugh and your nose- so pretty- gorgeous. Dunno how you could ever not like it. It feels so good when you´re-"

"Okay love i think i got it, thank you." She interrupted before you could get any further with details, but you didn't fail to notice the way her cheeks reddened at your last unfinished phrase, giggling at her sudden shyness.

As soon as she got in the driver's seat, your hand was grabbing hers, playing with her fingers as an effort to stay awake. Your eyes droppy and your head slightly lulling to the side - which she couldn't help but chuckle at before her eyes focused on the road ahead.

·˚ ༘₊·꒰➳: ̗̀➛

Unlocking the door to her appartment, Emily turned on the lights before pulling you to her room. You jumped on her bed before she could try to stop you, snuggling up to the pillow she slept in. "Hey none of that, we have to change your clothes and take off that makeup." She grabbed your calves as gently as possible, pulling you to edge of the bed, giving you a look that you knew meant she wasn't gonna let you sleep before you did what she said.

"Ugh okay, mom." You sassed before dragging yourself to her closet, rummaging through her pyjamas. "But just so you know, i'm using your clothes." You mumbled out with a joking tone.

"I'll get you some water." She said as she exited the room.

When she got back she was not suprise to see you sitting on the bathroom counter, half asleep with an unused makeup wipe in you hand.

"Here, let me do that angel." She sighed and took the wipe from you, softly wiping your makeup with one hand as the other held your head so she could sucessfully clean your face.

"All done." She mumbled after a momet, tapping your thigh as she helped you out of the counter. Her hands softly rubbed your arms before leading you into the bedroom and inside the comfy covers of her bed.

After making you take a few sips of water, she joined you in the bed, puling you against her chest. Her arms wrapped around your hips, gently running her fingers up and down the fabric of her your pyjamas.

"Thank you for taking care of me, i love you Em." You whispered sleepily before falling into slumber, head nestled against her chest and finger lightly grabbing at her shirt.

"I love you, sweet girl." She smiled against your hair, her own eyes starting to feel heavy.

·˚ ༘₊·꒰➳: ̗̀➛

a/n: i wrote this when i was sick and i lowkey hate it 😭

anyway emily deserves some love and hapiness in these last few seasons so i had to 🫶🏻

love you,

cat 🤍

[thisisntmyrightera]

Together - CHO HYUN-JU x Fem Reader Part 3

Summary: Reader is scammed and abandoned by her boyfriend, leaving her alone in South Korea to her fate, so in desperate search of a solution to return to her home country she decides to join the squid games to get money, within the game she meets a couple of people who become her friends and could possibly be something more.

Warning: Violence, homophobia mention of attempted rape and sexist language

----------------------------------------------------------------

◻○△ Hyun-Ju POV △○◻

The lights had barely gone out when Y/N had fallen asleep using one of her arms as a pillow and even though I was lying on my side, the space she used was still tiny, I could cover her with my arms and make her disappear without any problem.

The strands of her hair fell carefully and perfectly arranged around her head, some on her face where her long eyelashes adorned her cheeks, it was so strange to see and even more difficult to understand.

Previously, before I began with my identity recognition, my appearance attracted too many girls, many of them interested in my position and the economic benefits that this could bring to their lives, but I never felt attracted to them, they were all the same and empty.

But then why did I feel like this now? She could be my little sister, the fragile and sweet girl that I could take care of but my heart didn't feel that way, my stomach turned when she took my hand with fear, taking care that the bond didn't break so she wouldn't get lost from my side, my heart beat a thousand times faster when her eyes narrowed every time she smiled, my head spun every time she told me those words of encouragement making me see that I never made a mistake and that being who I am is no problem, she was the reason now for wanting to get out of this game and it didn't matter if I won the money or not, she was the best thing I had ever won.

Aren't you sleepy?…- she whispered making me jump slightly but I remained silent looking at her - don't pretend you're asleep… I can feel your gaze I'm sorry, I'm not sleepy yet..- I smiled at nothing feeling embarrassed for being discovered You should rest, tomorrow we will need strength to continue playing - her eyes barely opened illuminated with the warm light of the piggy bank - what are you thinking so much about? Thinking? What do you mean? - I looked at her curiously trying to pretend that everything was fine If you can't sleep, it's because your head is busy, what's wrong? - Damn, how did she know me so well? Just 3 days were enough for her to read me like the palm of her hand I was thinking… that… that this would be the last game we could play and then we would vote to withdraw from the competition - I smiled barely arranging a lock of her hair that covered her eyes I see, I was thinking the same thing, I don't want to be here anymore, when I get out I'll look for a job, no matter how bad the pay is, I just want to get out and go home - she sighed tiredly

If you don't mind telling me, now I would like to know why you decided to come to these games, what's your story?

Well… -she sighed deeply biting the inside of her lip a little and with another sigh she looked at me again- a year ago I met a guy online, he fell in love with me and he promised me that we would have a long and happy relationship, we went out for a couple of months just through messages and calls and one day he proposed to come to Korea to meet him and if everything went well I would stay with him to live and we would start a family, so… I quit my job and bought a ticket to come here… I met him and everything was going well but a couple of months later he… took all my money and disappeared, he barely paid the last month's rent and luckily they didn't throw me out but… -her gaze lowered sadly feeling ashamed- it was a stupid thing, I should never have trusted someone I didn't know

Men are disgusting… well.. you.. you understand - she laughed a little wiping her wet eyes - then you need the money for?..

To go back home, buy a plane ticket and go back to my country, I'm not welcome here and people have let me know in many possible ways, I just want to go with my family and start over what I left behind

Oh… - my heart felt like it was breaking into a thousand pieces, a part of me thought that by leaving this game she and I could get to know each other a little more, but she just wanted to run away from here, like I wanted and never hear from anyone else again - then… you'll leave

Yes I think so, but don't worry, once we get out we'll continue being friends and when I have a job I'll pay for all the necessary trips to visit you in Thailand - her eyes narrowed with the smile that formed on her lips, it was so comforting but at the same time so painful to hear that.

I didn't understand why it hurt, I had never felt that feeling of pain and abandonment in that sense, the sense of being in love with her.

Is something wrong? - Her small hand slowly touched my cheek making me focus my attention back on her just shaking my head smiling a little

Everything is fine, it's just that… I will miss my best friend as long as she doesn't come to visit me… - I lied and lied again when I told her I was sleepy and we had to sleep, I spent the night awake, watching her sleep once sleep overcame her again

The next morning, at the sound of the loudspeaker, everyone got up, as if so many hours had passed without even feeling the passage of time.

She barely woke up and jumped out of bed as if she had regained all the energy she had lost in the previous days, put on her shoes and almost ran down to greet Jun-Hee and ask her if she had slept well and if her baby had moved during the night. Y/N had barely found out that 222 was pregnant she kept asking her questions, excitedly showing that she couldn't wait for her turn.

Her authentic happiness made me feel much worse, it made me feel selfish, I wanted her for myself but I couldn't give her anything she wanted, I wouldn't give her the happy life, nor the family she dreamed of, it was a martyrdom and I only thought that I had made the worst decision to be the way I am now.

That is your punishment - the shaman laughed leaning on the bedposts - for following the wrong path that the gods wrote for you, now you will suffer, you love her but you will not have her

I don't know what you are talking about ma'am - I looked at her closing my sweater and arranging my hair with my fingers

Oh no? We are not stupid, we all know what you think when you look at her, how much you want to kiss her and show her that you love her but you don't, because you know that she doesn't like people like you, she only talks to you out of pity and she will never like you - the woman laughed, knowing that she had broken the last thing that was left in a piece inside me, she knew my secret and could use it against me to make me weak at any moment

Shut your mouth you damn bitch, you only know how to say shit, why don't you pray to the gods to give you a new brain uh? Get out of here - Geum-Ja confronted her pushing her away with her hands making the shaman go away laughing while I sat on the steps with my insides destroyed - girl, don't listen to her, that woman attacks where she knows she will truly destroy, don't give her that pleasure

She's right… - I looked at her sadly while she sat next to me brushing my hair with her fingers

Is she right? About we all know you have feelings for that girl? Of course she's right, but she'll never be right in stating what she feels or doesn't feel for you and we won't know until she tells you, maybe she sees you as an older sister or maybe as her best friend… -she smiled at me taking my hand- or maybe, deep inside, where no one knows her secrets, she feels for you the same as you do for her and it doesn't matter if you think you're not enough for her, when you're the right person for someone, all dreams come true

Do you believe in that? - I looked at her again feeling my lungs fill with air once again with her loving motherly smile

Of course, it doesn't matter what you were before or what you are now or if you are both girls, if love is sincere then love can do everything and I know you will fight to save yourself but especially her and I promise you that once we leave you two will go to my house and we will eat the best kimchi you have ever tasted, do you understand? - She laughed patting my back making me smile

''Players, it's time for a new game, please line up and leave in order following the masked soldiers''

Hyun-Ju, let's go - Y/N called me making me look at her quickly while she smiled

Go with her, I'll go with my son - Geum-Ja patted me again standing up as we both went down

Don't leave my side okay? - I looked at her as she nodded smiling and stood in front of me in the line of players

◻○△◻○△◻○△◻○△◻○△◻○△◻○△◻○△

The instructions had been clear and one thing was clear to me, I should not separate myself from Y/N at any time, she would be my priority in this game and no matter how many players there were, she would be the one who would always be by my side.

The platform spun to that traumatizing childhood song, everyone silently looking at each other

''10'' - The speaker spoke making us freeze

There are 4 of us, we need 6 more - Yong-Sik shouted desperately pulling his hair

Y/N! Here, there are 5 of us - Dae-Ho shouted pulling Y/N's arm making her look at him

There are 4 of us - I pulled her other arm bringing her back to me looking at him annoyed - Run to a room I'll look for one more

No Hyun-Ju I won't leave, let's go together - Y/N looked at me scared shaking her head

Don't worry, run! - I took her hand giving it to Dae-Ho making him pull her while I screamed looking for person 10 taking whoever the first person I saw was pulling her into the room

''10..9..8..7.''.- the speaker spoke making me nervous when I was able to enter the room and close the door almost fainting without oxygen in my lungs and the countdown reached zero we all looked at each other, the shots could be heard leaving us stunned as we caught our breath

Everyone is alive thanks to me! - the shaman shouted looking at us one by one - ah… I see why I'm here, to save your little friend's life - she laughed pointing at me

Don't start you damn crazy - Geum-Ja looked at her annoyed

As soon as the lock was removed and the door opened, everything was a bloodbath, we all walked in fear looking around confused when I felt a warm hand take mine.

You said we wouldn't separate… don't do that again - Y/N looked at me with her wet eyes

I'm sorry..- I smiled barely squeezing her hand walking slowly together so as not to slip with the blood on the floor

Again the song began to play and the platform turned again, this time with fewer players on it

''4'' - the speaker rang as soon as the song stopped making us look at each other

Run! Run now - I squeezed her hand pulling her as Geum-Ja and Yong-Sik followed us into the room and I closed the door leaning my back against it so no one could open it

This is so tiring… it's torture - Yong-Sik sat on the floor with his head in his hands desperate

Are you okay? - I looked at Y/N who was breathing heavily looking at the floor

Yes.. - she barely answered catching her breath

Again the lock opened letting us out, there was more blood and fewer people, the floor was sticky making our steps difficult until we reached the platform, once again the game began, the lights came on and the song played loudly

''3'' - the speaker announced making us look at each other again

What do we do? - Y/N looked at me scared

Come with me, we're doing in pairs and we'll look for someone - I grabbed her hand tightly, running screaming looking for someone, being pushed by Yong-Sik into the room

What are you doing here? Where's your mother? - I looked at him scared as he caught his breath

What?…what are you talking about? - he looked at me adjusting his misplaced glasses

The teams are 3 Yong-Sik, where did you leave your mother? - Y/N looked at him screaming upset

What? I understood 4, damn it - Yong-Sik tried to leave stumbling and throwing his glasses on the floor

This time Y/N let go of my hand and left quickly, grabbing Geum-Ja by the clothes skillfully by the back pulling her into the room with such force making her almost fall when she hit the wall and then she takes the door and closing it, now she was outside

No…Y/N NO, COME IN! - she looked at me through the gap in the door, her bright eyes looked at mine for the last time and then she ran - no, please no - the sound of the lock on the door rang and no matter how hard I pulled on it, it was impossible to open it

'' 10..9..8..7 ''

NO, NOT LIKE THIS, NOT HER - I looked at Geum-Ja pulling on my hair, my knees became weak making me fall on the floor as my tears fell

''6…5…4…3''

PLEASE DON'T KILL HER, DON'T SEPARATE HER FROM ME!..

''2…1…''

◻○△◻○△◻○△◻○△◻○△◻○△◻○△◻○△

Can you guess what would happen in the next episode? Can you guess who have a crush with Y/N? Let me read you! :3

Thanks for reading, I'll be back soon!

Tag List!

@kuureii @sann1e @sunflowers-are-heaven @bridellashiper @etta-huracan @cupiid1 @alianacelinecolux @juliexz @duchcess

[angelicyoongie]

lovesick (XII)

— pairing: yandere ot7 x (f) reader — word count: 6.3k — warnings: yandere, obsessive behaviour, explicit sexual content (vaginal fingering), other content that may be triggering. — summary: You dreamed of the day you would get your very own soulmark. Though, you didn’t expect to wake up to a searing hurt in your arm, the phantom pain of your shoulder being dislocated and your forearm fractured. As if dealing with the worst possible soulmark ever wasn’t bad enough, you also have to come to terms with the fact that you’re being stalked. When the letters and gifts you receive begin to escalate and the police offers no help, you have no other option than to figure out who’s behind it yourself – and hopefully before it’s too late.

Previous – Next

You pad slowly into the common room, rubbing your eyes.

Yoongi was abruptly called into work a few minutes ago – something about missing files and a tight deadline – so he had to usher you out of bed with gentle touches and soft apologies, sending you to wake up on the couch with Namjoon. 

"Hi darling," Namjoon croons as you collapse next to him, picking up one of the thick blankets strewn about to bundle you up with.

You let yourself be tucked in, the extra warmth is more than welcome with how chilly the cabin gets in the early mornings. The fireplace is barely crackling, the flames struggling to take hold with how recently they've been lit.

You mumble something unintelligible in return, pulling the blanket up to your nose to fend off the cold. Namjoon lets out a fond laugh as he scoots closer on the couch. He puts an arm around your shoulder, guiding your head to rest on his chest as he mindlessly plays with your hair. The soothing touches make your already heavy eyes flutter shut immediately, your consciousness drifting further away with every rise and fall of Namjoon's chest. 

You drift off for a while, the sounds of Yoongi's rushed goodbye as he runs out the door and Namjoon turning the pages of his book muffled under your sleepiness. Sitting curled up against Namjoon allows your body to slowly wake up, and lets you forget about everything that awaits you while you're caught in the in-between of sleep and reality. 

It's the sound of cupboards slamming that finally wakes you up, a sheepish sorry! being called from the kitchen. Namjoon's fingers still in your hair as you huff, your eyebrows creasing with displeasure as you realize it's time to open your eyes. 

"Morning," Namjoon murmurs warmly, "Jungkook doesn't always remember how strong he is, especially not when he's tired, so he has a bad habit of slamming things shut. I'm sorry he disturbed you." 

"'S okay," You yawn, "I should probably get up anyway." 

"Hmm, you don't have to," Namjoon curls his arm around your waist, holding you securely against his chest. "We can just stay here and cuddle until breakfast is ready." 

I'm sure you'd like that, you–

You stifle the vicious voice inside your head as soon as it rears its head. Even though you have decided to accept the cards you have been dealt, or rather, the cards that were forced into your hands; it's not something that can happen overnight. They've terrorized you for over a year so rewiring your brain to follow the path your soulbond is trying to lead you isn't easy. But you are trying.

"Sure," You concede, snuggling closer to Namjoon's firm chest. 

You watch as he delicately turns another page in the book he's reading, your eyes growing wide as you recognize the poem that's printed on it in faded letters. Your breath hitches as you blink, dumbstruck, down at the same collection you asked him about that day you visited him at the library. 

"Aren't these the poems Jungkook used in his letters?"

Namjoon tenses as he notices where your attention has drifted. His fingers subconsciously splay across the page, almost as if he's trying to hide the words, as he says, "Yeah, it is." 

"Why did you bring it here?" You ask as you eye the book warily. It's not like the book carries any good memories for you and on top of that, Namjoon seemed rather perturbed by the sight of it all those months ago. 

"It... I guess you can say it holds sentimental value," Namjoon murmurs. 

"My mom passed away when I was young so I don't remember much of her. I just have a blurry memory of us visiting a garden somewhere, her blue dress fluttering in the wind. Her passing broke my dad's heart. They were soulmates, so I think a part of him died that day too," He heaves a heavy sigh.

"Grief made him do stupid things and one of those was throwing away most of her belongings. I think it just hurt too much, that her things were still there but she wasn't, you know?"

You give a silent nod, heart squeezing at the way Namjoon's voice turns slightly shaky. 

"He luckily donated most of her books to the library. I don't think he knew she had written one of them," He gently taps the collection in his lap. "It wasn't until a few years ago that I found some old papers he had missed, once that were drafts of half-written poems and random thoughts. It was just luck, fate maybe, that I  recognized her writing. I had read through most of the local donations by that point to do a little feature stand and hers was one of them." 

"I'm sorry, about your mom, I mean," You push aside the throw to curl an arm around Namjoon's waist, giving him a comforting squeeze. 

"It's okay, it happened a long time ago," He whispers in return, resting his cheek on top of your head. 

"Do you know what happened – why she passed so young?" 

"I'm not sure," Namjoon says, "Dad never told me the full extent of it. I just know she had a lot of health issues." 

The pit of your stomach feels heavy as you rub your cheek against Namjoon's chest, hugging him close. His mom's history must be why he's been so adamant on making sure you're healthy and taking care of yourself, why he even went as far as scheduling medical check-ups for you. It doesn't make it right and it does not excuse his behaviour, but it does explain things.

"Do you know how Jungkook found the book? I remember the section being pretty hidden away," You tentatively say, trying to steer the conversation over to something a little lighter.

"Hm, I showed him that aisle a long time ago. It's probably the section that needs the least work since so few people know about it, so it would be easy for him to use it and put it back without me even noticing. He probably copied them down in his letters whenever I  wasn't on shift – I guess he didn't want me to notice and ask about it." 

You suppose that makes sense. No one besides Taehyung and Yoongi was open about their newfound soulmate connection and letters, so it adds up that Jungkook would want it to be a secret too.

"It's weird that he ended up with that particular collection out of every book in the library though," You muse. 

Namjoon's breath fans across your hair, his voice equally as thoughtful as he says, "Maybe it was our bond that did it. Even if it's just connected through you, it's still strong enough to influence us. That could explain why he was drawn to it." 

"Right," You swallow thickly. 

You suppress the shudder that wants to travel down your spine. It's a truly terrifying thought that everything has fallen into place like it was supposed to happen, like the universe made it that way. Even if Namjoon said that your bond is rare, there have to be others out there who are dealing with the same thing. Or, at the very least, there has to be some sort of explanation as to why all seven of them are acting this way – it surely can't be that it's just because they're feeling the bond more intensely than you are. 

"Actually, do you think you could do me favour?" You pull back just enough to glance up at Namjoon, giving him the sweetest look you can muster as you say, "Could you bring me some books on soulbonds from the library the next time you're there? I think knowing more about it will make everything a little... easier for me, you know?" 

Namjoon stares at you in silence, the second dragging on for much too long before he breaks out into a pleased smile. "Of course, darling, anything for you." 

"Thank you," You press a fleeting kiss to his jaw, hating how the action makes your own heart pick up speed.

You catch a glimpse of Namjoon's bright grin, dimples indented on his cheeks, as you hurriedly settle back down against his chest. He puts his book aside in favour of wrapping you up in his arms, humming something under his breath as he holds you close. 

Perhaps not all luck has left you just yet. Namjoon practically runs the local library, so if there's anyone who can bring you all the books you could ever want on soulmates and soulbonds, he's the right guy for it. 

You're sure there is some information out there that can be useful for you – you just need to find it first. 

"He's not giving up." 

You halt at Jimin's low hiss, wiping off the last bit of moisture on your hands on your sweats. You're halfway between the bathroom and your old room, shrouded in darkness as you wait with bated breath for Jimin to continue. 

"This is the second time he's come by this week and he even brought his boyfriend along to 'act as a witness'. I barely managed to keep them from making a scene." 

You can hear the agitation in Jimin's voice, can easily picture how his lips must be pressed together with annoyance as he paces around the room. You keep to the shadows as you creep closer, making sure you can't be seen from the open door. 

"It's Heejin– no wait, Heejun right? Y/n's friend?" 

Your heart jumps to your throat as you catch Seokjin's low murmur, gripping the wall for support as you listen to them talk. 

"That's the one," Jimin lets out an exasperated sigh. "He refuses to accept the story we came up with even though there's no evidence to suggest foul play. He keeps prodding and poking and if he continues, something will eventually lead him back to me, hyung. I don't care if he thinks I'm an incompetent cop; but if he's starting to suspect me, we'll have to deal with it – one way or another." 

You press your hand to your mouth, muffling the broken noise that squeezes past your lips. You have accepted your faith, have decided to work with it instead of against it, but your best friend doesn't know that. He just knows that you were being stalked and then one day, you were suddenly gone. If the situation was flipped, you would've been beside yourself with concern. You know he cares too much to give up but you can't let Heejun get hurt because of you. You miss him and Jaemin so much your body aches with it, but their safety is all that matters. You won't be able to live with yourself if the boys harm them in any way. 

You stumble back, ears ringing as Seokjin says something in return. You feel along the wall as you hurry back to the bathroom, your breaths falling quicker and quicker. You close the door behind you with shaking hands, leaning on it as you sink to the floor.

You're not sure how long you sit there, mind racing with possibilities of what you can do to stop them until Seokjin knocks on the door. 

"Angel, are you doing okay?" 

"Yeah! Just a minute," You clear your throat, legs unsteady as you clamber to your feet. 

You glance at the mirror, wincing at how disheveled you look. You brush your hair back with your fingers as you take deep breaths, attempting to make yourself look more put together and not like you weren't just tethering on the edge of a full-blown panic attack. 

"There you are," Seokjin grins as you open the door. He doesn't seem to find anything amiss as he grabs your hand, leading you down the dark hallway toward Jimin's room. 

Should you ask Seokjin about what you heard? Should you beg him to stop Jimin from doing anything rash?

"Let me know if you need anything, angel, you know I'm right across the hall," Seokjin's long strides take you to Jimin's door before you can make up your mind. He pauses before he opens it, leaning down to deliver a lingering kiss to your cheek. 

Warmth blooms where he touched your skin, your burning face thankfully hidden by the low light. 

"Sleep well, Y/n," He whispers. He gives your hand a gentle squeeze before he pushes the door open, guiding you in by your shoulders. 

"Angel delivery!" Seokjin announces as he walks you into the room, snickering at the embarrassed noise you make in protest to the cheesy line. 

"About time!" Jimin whines, "I thought hyung had stolen you away for the night." 

He pulls you out of Seokjin's grasp and into his arms before the older can hog more of his time, shuffling backward towards the bed as he says, "Close the door on your way out." 

"Excuse me?" Seokjin splutters, "Is that any way to treat your hyung?"

"Oh right," Jimin has his chin hooked over your shoulder, flashing Seokjin a teasing smile as he says, "Please close the door on your way out." 

"The disrespect! I swear– " Seokjin's voice tapers off into irritated mumbles as he shows himself out, closing the door behind him as Jimin requested. 

Jimin waits until he hears Seokjin's footsteps recede and another door close before he pulls back, making sure he isn't going to pop back in to ruin the moment. The boyish smile Jimin is sporting after teasing Seokjin softens as he meets your gaze. 

"Hi baby," Jimin cradles your face in his palm, running his thumb soothingly over your cheek. "I missed you." 

"Hi," You murmur back, easily returning his smile.

He's only been gone for two days, but something in you settles as you feel Jimin's touch; like a weird itch you didn't even know was there has been scratched. Jimin's shifts at the station often force him to be away for multiple days at a time and while it's a bitter pill to swallow, you've actually started to miss him while he's gone. It's not even just Jimin – if any of the boys are gone for more than twenty-four hours, your chest starts to feel hollow, like an important piece is missing. 

You hate it.

Jimin looks at you like he's drinking you in, his eyes never settling on one spot for too long.

If you're feeling their absence this strongly already, you're sure it must be a much worse experience for them. You've grown accustomed to the boys being a little more clingy than normal when they return and the extra skinship always seems to soothe you too. Yet, your breath still hitches as Jimin moves his thumb down to your mouth, lightly grazing over your bottom lip. 

The way Jimin's gaze keeps flickering back to your mouth makes it very obvious what he wants – craves – but he doesn't act on it; none of them do. So far the boys have seemed content, though perhaps somewhat resigned, to limit their kisses to your cheeks and hair. They know that pushing you past your limits will only backfire, that they'll only get what they truly want once you're willing and want them just as much as they desire you. They've already spent over twelve months watching you from afar, so you suppose a few months more doesn't make much of a difference now that they already have you in their grasp. 

It's only a matter of time before you break and you all know it. 

"Let's go to bed, baby. I've had a long day." 

"Everything okay?" You grip Jimin's hand a little tighter than intended as he leads you to bed, his earlier conversation with Seokjin echoing in your head.

"There's been a string of minor burglaries that have been giving me a headache, but there's nothing you need to worry your pretty head about," Jimin pulls the covers back, throwing you a reassuring look over his shoulder as he adds, "You're safe here with us, Y/n."

"I know. Thank you," You murmur, swallowing around the knot in your throat. 

You couldn't care less about some random break-ins, not in a situation like this and with Heejun's safety in jeopardy. Why would you worry about the monsters that are out and about in the city when you're fighting your own demons right here in the cabin? Regardless, you know that Jimin is speaking the truth. You pity anyone who would ever think to come to this cabin when you got seven, frankly unhinged, soulmates that are willing to do anything to 'keep you safe'. 

You crawl into bed first, getting yourself situated on your side as Jimin slips into place behind you. You raise your arm just in time for Jimin to curl his own around your waist, your legs slotting together with practiced ease. 

Jimin hugs you close to his chest, letting out a content sigh as he breathes in the slightly woodsy scent that lingers on your skin. "Sleep well baby, we'll catch up tomorrow," He drawls, pressing a kiss to the back of your neck. 

"Good night," You whisper back.

You curl both hands beneath your chin, staring aimlessly out the dark window that's visible from the bed. The rapidly approaching winter has made the already dark nights almost pitch black, engulfing the trees despite the clinging snow that tries to brighten them. There are no stars out, nothing but endless darkness that stretches around the cabin like an all-consuming void. 

You find you can't quiet your mind, your thoughts racing much too fast for it to happen. You can't shake off the conversation you overheard earlier, of how annoyed Jimin sounded as he mentioned Heejun and Jaemin. The boys have already proven that they're willing to go to great lengths to ensure that they get what they want, so you don't doubt for a second that they'll hurt your friends if they deem them to be in their way. 

You can't let them harm them. You won't be able to live with yourself if they do. 

Jimin's breathing has almost evened out when you reach down to grab his hand, your mouth opening to blurt out a choked, "Please don't hurt them, Jimin." 

There's a second where you wonder if he's already asleep when there's no movement aside from the steady rise and fall of his chest. Maybe it would be better if he is asleep, at least that would give you time to come up with a plan, but you're too frazzled to think straight. All you know is that you need to convince Jimin to back off. 

"Jimin–" 

You're gently shushed as he intertwines your hands, resting them on your stomach. 

"I guess you heard us talking," Jimin mumbles drowsily. 

He rests his face against your shoulder, voice muffled against your skin as he asks, "Do you remember how I told you about the night I first felt the bond? That time your 'friends' ditched you at that club. Do you know how you got home that night, baby?" 

"What? Don't change the subject–" 

"Just indulge me," Jimin interrupts you with a squeeze to your hand.

"No, I... I don't remember. I don't know," You mumble, eyebrows creasing as you try to recall any details from that night. Everything is fractured into broken memories, blurred from the copious amounts of alcohol you had in your system. 

You can only picture the sneer one of your 'friends' was sporting behind your back, clearly not meant to be seen by you as you suddenly turned around to ask her something. The flashing lights on the dance floor. Your bleeding knee as you tripped outside the club. Dark, polished shoes barely visible through your tears.

"I didn't just see you that night you fell outside the club, baby. I was the one that brought you home." 

"You did?" You stare into the darkness, stomach twisting with emotions you can't quite place. 

"Yeah," Jimin confirms with a slight nod. "You were drunk as hell and all alone, it wasn't safe for you to attempt to find your way home on your own. I knew you were hurt so how could I just leave you there to fend for yourself?"

"I think you, or the bond maybe, recognized me right away. You were all over me as I was trying to walk you to my patrol car, touching my face and giggling about how handsome I was," Jimin lets out a breathy chuckle. "You're a touchy drunk, baby, I almost had to put you in handcuffs on the way over to your apartment." 

– handcuffs, but I'd rather not do that to you right now. Just keep your hands in your lap, alright Miss?

Baby, you hear your own voice sniffly grumble, not "miss" – that's so boring. 

You're not going to make this easy for me, hm? Okay then, baby it is. 

The memory comes out of nowhere, catching you off-guard. You were the one that permitted Jimin, no – practically begged him – to use such a nickname for you? 

"You weren't easy to handle, Y/n," Jimin snorts. "It took me way too long to wrangle you to your couch and you almost started crying again when I left the room to grab your first-aid kit. You kept stroking my hair as I patched up your knee, switching between acting pouty and cute as you tried to convince me to come to bed with you." 

"I didn't, by the way," He adds as he notes the tension in your body. "I just helped you into bed and made sure you fell asleep before I left. Nothing happened. I would never take advantage of you like that." 

You believe him. Jimin's letters were always so sexual, always so ready to describe the ways he would touch you as if he was picturing your first time together. If he had already done so, you can only imagine what kind of imagery he would've painted for you in his letters. 

"So that's how you know where I lived," You say, mind reeling with the new information. You just thought he had passed you by that night, just long enough to feel the bond. You had no idea that he was the one that safely got you home.  

Jimin hums. 

"If you knew, why didn't you tell me? All of this, everything, could've been avoided that way." 

You feel him pause and hold his breath, before he slowly releases it. "I don't know, baby. I was overwhelmed that I had finally found you – scared that you wouldn't like me when you were sober. It just felt easier to watch you from afar and try to build up the courage to approach you again." 

Your heart twists with the idea of what could have been.

Jimin was the first soulmate who felt your bond and who later sent you a letter. If he had just approached you normally the day after your night out, you're not so sure everything else would have transpired the way it did. Maybe you would have looked for your remaining soulmates with his help once you figured out there was more than one. Maybe you would've met the other boys through Jimin or perhaps they would've been more inclined to approach you normally once they realized you shared a bond with their friend. 

Perhaps everything would have been different if Jimin had tried.

"Why are you telling me this?" You whisper.

"I know I haven't given you a great first impression but I'm not a bad person, baby. I just.. wanted you to know that," Jimin says, lips moving against your skin. 

This new knowledge does paint him in a slightly better light. You're mortified over the way you acted that night and you clearly gave Jimin some signals as to how you felt about him, but it still doesn't excuse the way he has acted or the things he has said over the past year.

He lets out a small, sad sigh when he doesn't get a response. 

"You asked about your friend. What if we come to an agreement on how to deal with him?" 

"Yes," The word spills out before you can even consider the consequences. 

Jimin goes perfectly still behind you, his voice a low rumble as he says, "Do you even know what you just agreed to, baby? I haven't told you what I want in return yet." 

You swallow thickly, giving him a barely-there nod. He might not ask for what you're thinking about but when it comes to keeping your friends unharmed, you're willing to do anything. Giving Jimin what he's been craving for over a year should hopefully make him more inclined to listen to you, to trust you. 

Jimin's breath hitches as you slowly bring your intertwined hands up your body, not quite touching but still making the implications very clear. You untangle your fingers as you reach your chest, leaving his hand resting just shy of it. 

You bite your lip, heart racing, as you wait for Jimin to touch you. A beat passes, and another, but his hand stays frozen in place where you left it, not even a finger moving closer to your body. 

"Why aren’t you?–" 

"You're tense," Jimin murmurs, nudging his nose against your tight shoulder. "I’ll only touch you if you want it – want me." 

"Do you?" He asks.

The question hangs in the quiet air between you, pending, as you try to find your answer. Had Jimin asked you the same question a few months ago, you know what your response would have been. Your body would have curled up in disgust, you would have screamed and kicked and punched if he had so much as tried to put a finger on you. But now... You're not so sure anymore. While the thought of what he's put you through still sickens you, it's not repulsion you feel as you imagine him touching you. 

You want it. 

Whether it's the soulbond, the isolation or just your mind breaking apart, you don't know. But that doesn't change the fact that you don't mind the idea of Jimin touching you. You even brought it up first, not knowing if this is what he wanted out of your agreement or not. 

You want him.

You lick your lips, your mouth feeling dry as you whisper out a quiet, "Yes." 

"I need a full sentence, baby. I want to make sure."

"Jimin," You barely manage to raise your voice, but it sounds so loud, so damning, in the quiet night. "Please touch me." 

Jimin stifles a groan against your shoulder, sounding hoarse as he says, "Okay, baby, as you wish." 

He nudges your oversized shirt to the side with his nose, attaching his mouth to the revealed skin. You let out a soft mewl as you feel the slight sting of his teeth sink into your shoulder, the sensation soothed by his tongue as he licks over the bite, sucking the skin between his lips. 

Jimin moves his mouth from your shoulder to your neck, leaving behind a trail of kisses and slowly forming bruises. He reaches out to grope your chest, moaning at the resulting shiver that runs through you. 

"Gods," He groans as he massages your breast, rolling your nipple through the thin fabric of your shirt, "Been thinking about this for so long." 

"Jimin–" You arch your back, gasping, as he suddenly pinches the nub. Jimin pulls and rubs at it in a way that makes your core throb, wetness coating your folds. As you push your breast into his hand, you feel something hard poke against your lower back, Jimin's hips rolling forward on instinct as he feels some friction. 

After all you've been through you know you shouldn't enjoy it, but it feels like your soul preens at the contact. You never thought you would end up here, that you would ever want to be in a position like this, but there's no denying that your body is practically vibrating with excitement as Jimin touches you. Still, there's a small knot in your stomach that only feels heavier the more skin you let him explore. You don't know how much of this is actually you and how much of it is just the bond that ties you together. 

"My pretty baby," Jimin murmurs as he moves his hand over to your other breast, giving it the same treatment as the first as he slowly grinds his cock against your body. 

He gives your nipple one last mean tug, one that makes your cunt clench with need, before he slowly trails his hand down to your stomach. Your breath hitches as he moves his fingers under your shirt, the skin-on-skin contact causing you to let out a soft moan. Your body feels electrified as Jimin caresses your stomach and sides, his fingertips mapping out every inch of the area before he dips them down under the waistband of your sweats. 

"Please," The word barely has time to leave your mouth before Jimin obliges, hand sliding between your legs to cup your cunt. He glides his fingers between your folds, groaning as he feels how soaked the material of your underwear has become. 

"Fuck, you're dripping for me already, baby," Jimin curses as he continues to feel up your cunt, dragging the pad of his finger from your aching clit down to your slick hole, giving it just enough pressure to feel the tip of it dip in. 

The sensation makes you squirm with want, rolling your hips against Jimin's cock. He lets out a choked sound at the action, attaching his lips to your neck to give you another hickey. He hisses with frustration as he struggles to touch you properly, the angle awkward and your clothes restricting his hand. 

Jimin taps the inside of your thigh to make you spread your legs further. Heat floods your face as you feel just how wet you are as your legs part, hooking your foot over Jimin's calf to give him more room. 

"Good girl," He praises as he finally pushes your underwear aside. The first touch of his fingers against your aching cunt makes you both moan, your heart thumping harshly in your chest with anticipation. 

You know there's no going back after this. The knot in your belly, the lingering hostility, is practically overshadowed by your mounting pleasure. You can feel the part of you that's still angry quieting down more and more with each touch, the tight grip you've had on your resentment loosening. You know this is wrong, that you never should have let Jimin – your stalker – touch you like this regardless of how much your soul is yearning for him. But the horrible truth is that you're never getting away from them. And if this makes Jimin happy, then that means you should have it easier too, right? 

Gods, how could you sink so low–

Jimin doesn't waste much time teasing you, too impatient for it when you're already this dripping wet.

He drags his finger along your slit, coating it in your slick before he prods at your entrance. The digit slides into your wet heat easily, your walls fluttering around it as you try to get used to the feeling. He gently pumps his finger in and out at first, making sure you're relaxed before he adds another one. He thumbs at your clit as the second finger joins the first, the jolt of pleasure masking the slight discomfort as you're stretched out more. 

You can't quite believe how easily your body allows him in, how painless it feels compared to the previous times you've been with someone in the past. Maybe Jimin is just more skilled, but it feels like your body knows to relax in Jimin's hold, like it wants to be good for your soulmate.

"Shit," You whimper as Jimin's fingers curl against your walls, bumping into the spot that makes stars explode behind your eyelids. You clench down around him, trying to keep him in place and yet draw him in even deeper, desperate for that burst of pleasure again. 

"P-Please don't stop," You beg, your mind blissfully blank aside from the mounting pleasure in your core.

"I won't, baby, I won't," Jimin groans. He keeps up the steady motion of rolling his hips against your body, grunting as you work yourself on his fingers, pressing your ass harder against his cock. 

You bury your head into your pillow as Jimin's fingers begin pumping into you faster, stifling your increasing moans as he touches that sensitive spot over and over. Your leg trembles, toes curling, as Jimin angles his fingers, ceasing his thrusting in favour of rubbing your g-spot head-on. 

Desperate noises fall from your lips as your stomach begins to tighten, your release building so quickly that it leaves you gasping for air. You're almost there, your cunt clenching needily around Jimin's fingers. 

"Come for me, baby," Jimin rasps. The faintest brush of his slick thumb against your clit is all it takes for you to come undone. 

"Jimin!" You cry out his name as your pleasure unravels, your vision whitening out as your release hits you. You feel your slick gush around Jimin's fingers as he keeps brushing against your walls, prolonging your orgasm for as long as possible. 

The sound of you moaning his name with so much passion makes Jimin growl, his hips snapping forward. Your wetness coating his fingers and your warm body twitching underneath his is all it takes for Jimin to find his own release; he grinds his hard cock against you once, twice, before he explodes with a deep groan.

You lay in bed, panting, as you try to catch your breath. You let out a choked whine as Jimin carefully pulls out his fingers, everything feeling so sensitive after the intense orgasm you just had. 

"You're amazing, Y/n," Jimin croons as he presses a kiss to the nape of your neck. He slips his hand out from your clothes, rubbing your stomach contently as he says, "Just give me a second to find something to clean us up with, baby, I'll be right back." 

You let out a soft noise in return. 

You wait for the deep regret and anger to come rushing in as you hear Jimin swiftly exit the room, for the high in your veins to turn to disgust as he returns to carefully wipe you down with a damp cloth and whisper sweet nothings about how much he adores you. 

It doesn't happen. 

Everything in you feels thrilled at Jimin's attentiveness, at how closely he wraps you up in his arms when he's done. Your heart flutters with excitement as he tucks you close to his chest, arms wrapped around your body securely. 

Your soul feels so content that you struggle to grasp onto the hatred you feel for them, the feeling buried deep beneath the happy emotions your soulbond tries to overwhelm you with. 

Your resentment hasn't changed. Won't ever change. But how do you explain that you wanted Jimin to touch you – that you enjoyed it? You don't want this or them so why do you feel so content? It breaks your heart to realize that while you do hate them, some small part of your is starting to like them too. 

You squeeze your eyes shut, trying to block out Jimin's pleased hums as he runs his fingers up and down your arm. You know you won't get any answers tonight and letting your mind run around in circles won't do you much good either. You need the books Namjoon promised he would get for you, that's the only place you'll be able to find some answers. 

You let Jimin's repetitive motions soothe you towards sleep, your eyelids growing heavy. 

"Baby?" Jimin murmurs, the rhythmic fall and rise of his chest skipping a beat as he tenses up for a split second.

"Hmm?" You make an affirmative sound in return, brows furrowing at the sudden shift in Jimin's mood. 

"We've been pretending to be you on your phone, texting your friends and family to keep up appearances. Heejun doesn't buy it."

Your eyes snap open in the darkness, your breath catching in your throat. 

"He knows something is wrong since we can't pick up whenever he tries to call you. We won't hurt him or his boyfriend, I– we, know you'll never forgive us if something happens to them. But we need him to back off," Jimin grumbles.

You clutch at his tee, sleep washed away and voice bordering on frantic as you ask, "What do you need me to do?"

"Simple," Jimin sighs, pressing a fleeting kiss to the top of your head, "You just have to convince him that you don't want to talk to him anymore. That's the only way he'll leave us alone." 

The thought makes you want to laugh. There's no way Heejun would ever believe something like that. You've practically been attached at the hip ever since you were young, been through so many highs and lows that you taking a trip to the moon sounds more possible than ever growing bored of him. Heejun would never buy such a simple excuse, hell, he would probably only double down harder to figure out why you're so hellbent on ignoring him. 

"Right, simple," You echo, deflating in Jimin's arms.

It's never going to work. 

You'll have to come up with a much better idea if you want to protect your friends and keep them safe. 

a/n: hhh.... so that happened?? 🫣 we got a lot of new information in this chapter! we finally learned more about namjoon's backstory and his connection with the poems, the mc needs to figure out how to convince her friends she's okay and well... we have finally reached the smut!!

please leave a comment and reblog if you enjoyed the chapter and let's scream about what went down with jimin lol 💖

see you soon!

[ifimdreaming]

can i take you home?

luke hughes x reader || angst, fluff

request: “i like the idea of her best friend going to michigan/dating a former teammate of lukes so thats how luke and reader meet! i love angst and given that its lukes rookie year/she goes to college in another state, maybe they could be friends w benefits but both have strong feelings.”

author's note: i thought this request was so so cute so i kind of took it and ran. also kinda influenced by i miss you, im sorry by gracie abrams. this is also super long but i hope the ending is worth it. let me know if i should do more parts of this!

word count: 5.0k

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Waking up to the sound of your best friend pounding on the guest bedroom door at 7am was not exactly the best way to start your day. But since you are staying the weekend in her student house that she shares with 5 other people, there are definitely unluckier ways you could have been awoken. 

“Morning sleepy head!!! I'm so happy you're up!” your best friend Emma almost shouts as she barges in the room, after you very reluctantly told her she could come in. She immediately begins opening the curtains, and rummaging through her closet to find her outfit for the day.

In her haste she almost spills the two cups of coffee she had brought up from the kitchen as she sets them on the dresser beside the bed, her mug being almost completely empty anyway. You can tell by her enthusiasm and caffeine intake that she has been up for quite a long time before deciding to wake you up. 

You groggily roll over and face away from the wide open curtains, not ready to face the day yet and really disappointed in yourself for choosing to drive up so late last night in the first place.

Of course you were happy to be able to visit your best friend, the two of you going to different schools making it incredibly hard to spend much time together anymore. But being back here brought back so many memories of the last time you visited. Both good and bad. And to be honest, all you could think about was him. From the very moment Emma invited you, he has been on your mind nonstop. 

The way he made you feel so utterly adored when he brought you back to his room, how he spoke to you so gently and quietly the one morning when you were hungover, the time he spilled and called you ‘his’ while you were in bed together, and how much it seemed like it would last forever. It was all coming back so strongly.

“So, what are the plans for the day Little Miss Sunshine?” you sit up, reluctantly speaking your first words of the day after clearing your throat. 

“Well! First I thought we'd go get bagels for breakfast from down the street, and then I think one of us may need a quick shower before we officially start our day…” Emma says with a hand on the side of her mouth, pretending to be saying a secret as she is side-eyeing you, and you just stare at her offendedly, “Aaand we are doing something tonight so maybe we should go shopping..” she says quickly and excitedly, clearly brushing past what exactly it is that we are doing tonight.

“Alright then.” you say as you check your phone for probably the 20th time in the 10 minutes you've been awake. And you can see Emma staring at you from the corner of your eye so you decide to throw your phone to the other side of the bed, getting up and ready to go. You knew she wasn't oblivious, but you did not want to acknowledge the look she was giving you right now, and honestly it did not seem necessary to bring anything up.

Besides, this weekend isn't even about him. Dylan's surprise birthday party is tomorrow and your best friend was so excited to be planning it with your help. She hadn't done anything this extravagant for her boyfriend before and she wanted everything to be absolutely perfect.

Obviously the last thing you would want to do is ruin this weekend for her, and your stupid feelings and non-relationship are included in that.

-

The walk to the bagel shop seemed awkwardly long as you were both not acknowledging the fact that your mind is very very distracted. It wasn't intentional. But feelings and places have such strong connections and the fact that things felt so unresolved was not helping. Everywhere you are here reminds you of him.

“How's your bagel?” Emma speaks up, finally breaking the silence on your walk home, thankfully giving you an opportunity to get out of your thoughts.

“Oh it's good! Thanks! I was super hungry…” you say, trying to muster up a believable enough reason for why you've been so off today. 

You continue walking and shuffling your feet in silence and are about to return back to the house before Emma looks at you and sighs loudly.

So. Close. You are literally about to step onto the driveway of the house when she stops you. 

“Ok can we just talk about it please? Because there is no way we are going to get through this entire weekend just ignoring it.” she says, stepping in front of you and blocking any sort of way for you to get out of this conversation. 

“What are you talking about?” you say with a grumble and a sigh. Knowing she is going to get it out of you. Obviously she would.

“Luke.” Emma says deadpan, waiting for your response.

For some reason at this moment you wanted to cry just hearing his name. But you also wanted to yell. Your feelings were confusing and annoying and it upset you to even have to talk about it with someone, even though you knew you should.

“I don't know. I DON'T KNOW. I can't stop thinking about him, and everything is so confusing.” you whisper-yell at her in frustration. 

It pained you to admit that you couldn't get him off your mind. You didn't realise how much you even liked him until having to admit that.

“He visited me during christmas… I mean, he did in the fall, but this time felt different.” You continue,  “We slept together again. Everything felt like it was going so well…And now nothing.” you admit to her and wipe your face with your sleeves, angry at the tears that have fallen from your eyes. 

“Has he called?” She asks warily.

“Once? Last week. It was short… but he sounded sad. He said he misses me. And he told me he really wanted to visit me. And I've texted him since then and no response.” you look down at your feet as you speak. It really shouldn't be this embarrassing to admit. It's not like you were in a relationship with him anyway.

“He's going to be here...tomorrow? I didn't know if you knew..” Emma says as she grabs your arm and slowly brings you close to her as you begin walking inside together and you nod your head in her direction.

You knew he would be here. Dylan is one of his best friends, obviously he isnt going to miss his 21st birthday. But with how things were currently going, it honestly made you wonder if Luke would even want you here. And what do his friends even know about you two? Has Luke said anything? So many questions are going through your head that it is almost making you dizzy.

-

The rest of the day is so much lighter after your earlier conversation. Emma is exponentially good at cheering people up, and maybe even to a fault, will always be on your side no matter what. But you appreciated it regardless.

You are currently finishing up putting on your makeup and getting ready to go out tonight, still very unaware of what the plan even is. But you didn't have much of a choice in the matter as Emma has picked out every aspect of your outfit tonight - down to the shoes, makeup, and jewellery.

Suddenly Emma gets a call from Dylan and runs into her bathroom to answer the phone, the music cutting out that was playing from her phone as she heads off, and silence filling the room.

You weren't intending to be eavesdropping, but you are able to hear muffled voices from the other side of the door and very hushed arguing that you couldn't quite make out. Making you curious as to what could possibly be going on tonight.

Emma saunters back into the room with hesitancy, her expression is scared and concerned at the same time as she is approaching you almost in slow-motion, saying nothing.

“What is it? Just spit it out.” you say, already knowing you are either about to hear the worst news of all time or the worst news of all time.

“Ok surprise! We're going out for sushi! Yay!” Emma says, obviously starting with the good news and you stay silent.

“And…Luke is coming out with us.” she continues, flinching at her own words as she plops herself on the bed across from you. You sit at her desk, makeup in hand, and cannot help but have an absolutely astonished look on your face. 

Nothing is able to even leave your mouth as her words run through your mind again and again.

“I am so SO sorry.” She starts. “One of the guys accidentally told Dylan that Luke is in town and I didn’t want to ruin the surprise for tomorrow, so I told Dylan that Luke and I were trying to surprise him tonight for dinner. I didn't know what else to say. It was literally the first thing that came to my mind. I'm so sorry.” she continues, worried she has done irreparable damage on your friendship.

“You can kill me now.” Emma blurts out defeatedly, wanting to keep the surprise for tomorrow and not wanting all her efforts to be ruined the day before the party.

Obviously you love that girl, but very much did want to kill her in this moment.

“Does Luke know I'm going to be there?” you ask, brushing past everything else she has said.

“Dylan said he would tell him, yeah, but if you don't want to come please don't feel like you have to.” she says with a small smile, hoping you have some-what forgiven her.

“No, I'll still come.” you say quietly but matter-of-factly.

If Luke knew you were coming, it would be weird if you decided to stay home now because of it, and besides, what would you do here alone? Thinking of what he would be doing and wishing you could read his mind is all you can think of.

“OH? This is good! Ok! Dylan said he is picking us up in 20 minutes!” Emma states, suddenly very excitedly, hoping it will cheer you up to see that she is excited. And as you continue getting ready, nervous energy and anticipation fill your body.

- 

Dylan shows up right on time, unfortunately for you, not giving you any extra time to sit and wallow in your feelings.

It was inevitable that you would be seeing Luke this weekend, but this quickly and under these conditions was not exactly ideal. You were hoping to at least be able to have a one-on-one conversation with him before being thrown into random get togethers where things have no chance but to be awkward.

The drive to dinner is surprisingly happy. Dylan seems so excited to be seeing his best friend again. He can't stop talking about the last time they saw each other and how long it has been. And Emma's laughter and giddy energy is helping you calm down and distract you just a little bit.

“The reservation is for 7pm so we might have to wait in the car for a few minutes.” Emma says, checking her phone as Dylan pulls up to the restaurant a bit early. 

The dim lighting and intimate booths look extremely inviting as you peer inside the windows of the restaurant from the parking lot. You can't help but get distracted by watching people inside as Emma and Dylan talk from the front seats of the car and are cutely chatting to each other quietly.

“There's my boy!” Dylan yells out as he jumps out of the driver's seat, running up to give Luke a hug across the parking lot.

“Ready?” Emma looks back and asks you, reassuringly placing her hand on your knee and rubbing her thumb up and down a few times.

“Guess so…” you say with a fake smile as you grab your purse from beside you, and as you are about to leave the car, you see a tall figure standing right outside your door.

Only a little bit startled, you look up to see Luke as he opens your door for you and greets you with a tired smile. He is dressed nicely in black pants and a cream cable knit sweater, his hair curly and tousled up like always. 

As you step out of the car he brings you into a tight hug, like he just couldn't wait to hold you again.

“I missed you…” Luke whispers so quietly into your ear that you almost couldn't hear him. He swiftly leaves a gentle kiss to the side of your head as he brings his hands just a bit lower down your back, “I’m sorry” he says quietly as he releases you.

As much as you want to reciprocate, you are so caught off guard by his words that you just stare up at him without a word.

“Alright let's go! I'm so hungry!” Dylan says, unaware of the tension, as he pats Luke's back and wraps an arm around him, walking in front of you and Emma and into the restaurant. 

Emma is glancing at you as you walk together, waiting to hear from you what Luke said, but you decide to ignore it with a shrug and she looks away. 

-

Dinner is filled with laughter and catching up with one another. Surprisingly it wasn't even half as awkward as you built it up to be. Dylan chatting away with Luke as you and Emma giggle across from each other about all the drama at your respective schools. 

Having a couple of drinks throughout the night was definitely helping, but regardless of that, you felt good. Really good.

“Luke, how's the love life going for you? You got a girl in Jersey?” Dylan asks with a laugh as Emma had just bragged about her and Dylan going on 2 years of being together.

She shoots you a regretful look as she hits Dylan's side with her elbow, not as discreetly as she probably wanted to, and your face turns bright red.

Luke looks down at his lap and shakes his head with a chuckle, seemingly avoiding eye contact with you at all costs.

“No man, no girl in jersey.” Luke says lightly as he takes a drink of his beer before the two of you make eye contact and he glances down to your fidgety hands that are in your lap. 

“My bad, my bad…” Dylan says with a laugh as he clears his throat and starts back to finishing the food on his plate, Emma quietly shushing her clueless boyfriend beside her.

Your nervous hands continue to pick at your cuticles and you look over to see Luke inching his hand closer beside yours on the booth bench. Looking up from your lap, you see him glancing back at you as he waits for your reaction before discreetly taking your hand in his under the table.

The feeling of his hand in yours is so comforting and familiar and immediately eases your anxiousness. But you still feel so conflicted.

Luke always knew how to comfort you and distract you from your thoughts when they were out of control. Especially during busy school semesters and many nights spent together with him keeping you company while you anxiously wrote papers and prepped for exams. 

He seemed to be there for you when it felt like you had no one else. At least that's how it used to feel. Now things feel so complicated. Not knowing the status of your relationship surprisingly taking a much larger toll on your ability to act like friends than you would have ever thought.

“So! I've got the bill tonight guys. Happy birthday Dyl!” Emma blurts out as the waiter approaches the table, she leans over to give her boyfriend a loving kiss, comfortably filling the awkward silence that had just taken over the table not long before.

“Thank you baby! And hey! thanks guys for coming out tonight too.” Dylan smiles at the both of you as he lifts up his glass for a toast. You all clink your glasses, wishing him happy birthdays that follow big swigs of your almost empty alcoholic beverages.

Walking out of the restaurant, your mind fills with running thoughts. You wish you had spoken to Luke more tonight but it was hard to not make anything obvious. He seemed good, but still weirdly sad and you wanted to talk to him about it so badly. You wanted to talk to him about everything.

As you near Dylan's car you feel Luke's hand brush against yours and lightly hold your wrist, turning you around to face him.

“Can I take you home?” Luke shyly asks you as you all stand in the parking lot together. You mutter a “sure” under your breath with a nod, and he looks to Dylan and Emma for confirmation, both of them nodding in agreement before bringing you into tight hugs and saying goodbyes.

“Tell me everything that happens girly.” Emma runs back over to you and whispers into your ear as she hugs you goodbye once more, and all you can do is let out a small laugh in response to her teenage-esque behaviour.

-

After Dylan and Emma drive away, the short walk over to Luke’s car suddenly seems agonisingly long and your heart is racing in anticipation. Over anything else that happens tonight, you really wanted clarity. But of course, thoughts of the worst possible outcome ever sneak their way into your mind.

Luke opens the passenger side door for you and you climb into his car before he gently closes the door and walks to the other side. As he gets in, he begins to start the car before he looks over to you and pauses, the quiet becoming almost painful. 

You didn't know what to say, and you didn't want to say the wrong thing. So, waiting for him to break the silence seemed to be your best bet.

“I know I should have thought of something to say…” He starts, and shuffles in his seat, slightly bending his right leg so he is facing you a little more.

“I'm sorry. I shouldn't have stopped responding to you.” Luke continues, and you almost want to roll your eyes at his apology. It was so hard to be understanding when this felt like such a preventable situation on his part.

But you knew Luke. You knew when he was scared he got distant. You knew he was pulling back from you. You just didnt know why.

“Things have been so…weird…lately, and I just…I know I fucked up.” He confesses.

You didn't want to be reading between the lines anymore. You just wanted him to be honest with you about what he wants, and it frustrated you that he was being so vague.

“Luke, what do you want? Like, from me?” you ask innocently, but squint your eyes closed tightly as the words coming out of your mouth sound completely different from what you intended.

“Like, you told me we were friends. And obviously I was ok with that. But when you would visit me, we’d sleep together. And when you left it was like. I don't know…” you look down and pick at your fingers as you speak, looking up at him feeling like an almost impossible task.

“You told me you wanted to be friends.” Luke states, and gently grabs your hand. He holds it in his to stop you from destroying your fingers as you speak, which causes you to look up at him, thanking him silently, as he waits on your response.

“I said that because I knew how hard it would be for us to be so far away from each other.” you say strongly, feeling the sudden need to defend yourself.

“You know how important school is to me, and I know how important your career is to you. I don't want to distract you from what's important to you. I don't want to be the one that gets in the way of things, or be the reason why you're not as focused as you could be…as much as I want to be-” you begin to confess, but are quickly cut off.

“It's kinda too late for that…” Luke says with a chuckle as he tilts his head back against the headrest of his seat and looks out the front window, frustration still evidently seen on his face.

“What do you mean??” you ask, hoping he will elaborate a little more than he has been so far.

“You already distract me. I can't stop thinking about you. And it's obvious. In my game and everything too. Even Jack has noticed and he keeps asking me about you and I don't even know what to say. I can't shut him up. Cuz how am I supposed to tell him how I feel when I can't even tell you? Its actually really fuckin annoying.” he laughs as he explains, still looking ahead out the window instead of at you. 

Luke has always sought to use humour and jokes in difficult situations, especially when it comes to his own feelings. He's clearly frustrated at himself and it hurts you to see him having such a hard time expressing himself.

“So why have you been so distant lately?! I’ve been really worried about you.” you say, suddenly feeling more confident in confronting him as he opens up to you.

“Cuz im scared im gonna fuck things up even more than I already have…” he says honestly as he turns his head to look at you again.

“I knew I should've said something from the moment we slept together the first time. I feel like I fucked up by keeping my mouth shut. It's been ruining my life to not just be honest with you.” he adds with a growl deep in his voice, anger at himself seeping through his words.

As he continues, you can't help but feel entranced by him in his current state, and suddenly you are very aware of how late at night it is becoming. 

“It's my fault...” Luke says, and you desperately try to focus on his words and not his body. 

But you can't help but think about how good his hands would feel on your body and how badly you want him to kiss you right here and now. You didn't care that you were still in the parking lot of a sushi restaurant. You didn't care that things were still so confusing and that this probably wasn't exactly the most ideal time to be feeling this way. You just felt like you needed him so badly.

“I've been treating you like shit lately. Regardless of us sleeping together, that should not change how I treat you. I've been a shitty friend to you, and I'm really really sorry.” he continues, and you are brought out of your trance. 

His words hit you so hard. You both unknowingly made this relationship so complicated and weren't even aware of it. You knew Luke was not perfect, but for some reason you expected him to be able to read your mind, and vice versa. Even after being the one to say you should stay friends, you were silently upset that nothing was happening in the way you wanted.

“Luke, it's ok. Both of us have not been entirely honest with each other lately and it's made everything so… fucked up. We’re just… in a weird spot.” you say, hoping your words make any sense considering you zoned out for half of his apology.

“Can I just say that I want to be able to fix this?” Luke says as he places his hand on your thigh, his fingers mindlessly getting higher and higher as he rubs slowly back and forth. Trying his best to soothe you and unknowingly turning you on even more.

“It isn't just on you to fix.” you say as you place your hand softly over his, stopping his movement on your leg as to not let it overly distract you.

“Yes it is. I let you down. I fucked up by being so fucking…distant. I should've been more clear about what I want…that I want you..” Luke admits, giving into what he has wanted to say from the moment you got into the car together.

His eyes are fixed on yours and it makes your heart flutter in your chest. Hearing him so confidently confess how he is feeling after so long is such a relief. It makes you want to just tell him you love him right here and now.

“I know things are complicated…but, I really don't want to not have you in my life…” Luke adds as tears begin to well in his eyes, catching you both off guard.

“Oh Lukey.” you whisper as you hold his face in your hands, your heart melting at the sight of him. 

Luke places his hands on your wrists, pulling them away from his face as he finally leans into you. 

His lips hit yours with an intensity that you have never felt before from him. His hands move away from yours, and to the base of your neck, gently pulling you closer into him as he deepens the kiss. 

Your eyes are glued shut as you are entranced by his lips finally being connected with yours as his tongue dances around in your mouth. 

Needing to have your hands on him, you reach up to brush his face with your thumbs and then begin gently tugging at the curls at the nape of his neck, causing him to lustfully groan deep into your mouth. Your mind is filled with excitement and intensity as the moment grows in mutual desire.

“I needed you baby.” You say rushedly, disconnecting with him for only a moment.

Luke smiles against your lips as you connect again, and he places his left hand on your hip, massaging his fingers into your side. You lift yourself lightly onto the centre-console, desperate to be as close to him as you can get, and he lowers his hand just below your ass to help support you.

Although being in the close quarters of Luke's car while having such a monumental conversation about your relationship was not quite ideal, you were so thankful for it at this moment.

“I needed you too.” Luke says after coming up for air, and you just stare at him with a dizzy smile, your head reeling with arousal.

He pecks your lips a few times before lowering his head to your collarbone, gently kissing your neck and leaving red marks where he most definitely has before.

Your giggles fill the car as he continues expeditiously exploring your body, wanting to savour every moment of your presence and relishing in the way he is pleasing you.

Luke looks up at you with a smile before his eyebrows furrow and he is distracted by something behind you, causing you to whip your head around to look out your window, immensely alarmed at his expression. 

Luke lightly lets go of you, allowing you to sit properly in your seat and as your eyes focus on the window, the sight of a kind-looking restaurant hostess tapping on the glass outside of your door almost sends you reeling into a panic. 

Luke quickly reassures you with a laugh, placing his hand on your arm and starting the car before beginning to roll your window down for them to speak.

“I am so sorry if I startled you, but our restaurant has closed, which means we can no longer allow you to park here, as free parking ends at midnight.” the hostess explains politely while pointing to the sign posted on the brick wall just in front of Luke's car. 

“Thanks Ma’am. We’re so s-sorry.” Luke pauses to hide his face, clearly hiding that he is about to break into laughter.

“We’ll leave right aw-” Luke laughs out, hardly able to finish his sentence before being sent into a fit of silent laughter.

“We’re so sorry. Have a good night!” you say more seriously, trying to make up for the completely unserious boy beside you.

“Goodnight guys!” the hostess says as she walks away, leaving you completely embarrassed and also scared half to death.

Luke continues dying of laughter and is hunched over the steering wheel as you punch his arm repeatedly to get his attention.

“That was awful! Why are you laughing so hard!” you say unimpressed, but still unable to hold back laughter of your own after seeing him look up at you with tears in his eyes.

“Fuck. I can't get over your face.” Luke says as he begins to come down a little, wiping the tears from his eyes. You just shake your head and begin to buckle your seatbelt, not taking any chances of having to be asked to leave once more.

“Fuck.” he says once more with a sigh, relaxing in his seat and looking over to you with a genuine smile before patting your thigh reassuringly.

You look to Luke expectantly and he stares back at you with a smirk before kissing your lips passionately, catching you off guard. 

Your hands are drawn to his face as he nudges your chin with his, causing you to lean into him even further before he pulls away from you abruptly.

“Can I take you home?” Luke asks with lust in eyes as he brushes his thumb across your cheek, admiring every single feature on your face. His words having a different meaning to both of you than they have previously tonight.

“For real this time?? Because you know we cant sit in this parking lot any longer…” you say jokingly as Luke rolls his eyes at you and begins to put his seatbelt on.

“Yes, for real this time.” He retorts. His right hand eagerly finding yours as he interlocks your fingers with his, bringing your hand up to his lips to place a tender kiss before finally driving off.

-

-

[cryptidghostgirl]

*Shuffles in* HEWWWOO

I GOT ANOTHER (I'm so sorry) Alastor x Chubby!Reader 😔

(This might seem weird and so so strange but I swear it's not perverted and shouldn't be seen as such)

Magic is in hell, yeah??? SOOO what if Alastor tries to his dark voodoo sprinkle magic but IT BACKFIRES or something while he tries to fix that one wall in the show that keeps getting destroyed or helping charlie with something 🤔 and he turns into A KID BUT A HUMAN KID BACK WHEN HE WAS ALIVE and everyone kinda justs bombards him with questions and comments (not Husk in the background smirking because Alastor is an asshole to him so he's planning all the ways he can get his revenge, Charlie freaking out, Angel cooing at his cuteness, vaggie cursing up a storm, niffty sulking because he's no longer a bad boy) and I would imagine that child Alastor is kinda like '🥹who are all these weird creatures, where am I, where's momma' ...😭 chaos ensues, Alastor just wants his momma so he's crying as loud as he can because 'I'm lost' (HES A MOMMAS BOY AND I FEEL AS A KID HE WAS INNOCENT AND SWEET) the hazbin hotel residents immediately try to calm him down but he only gets louder THEN LIKE AN ACTUAL ANGEL here comes reader back from shopping or waking up and is welcomed to all the commotion, and after making her presence known Alastor just sniffles at her, tears streaming down his face 😢 reader immediately going to tiny Alastor to help and tiny Alastor who thinks reader is a fairy? Angel?? Goddess?? Some warm welcoming figure that he's gonna marry (like playground kids sometimes do??) so he's calming when she goes to help him,' he's been kidnapped' looking back at the hazbin gang, more tears coming, reader immediately going into caretaker mode and cares for him throughout the whole ordeal, while Alastor gushes about his momma or talkinging readers ear off about anything and everything (Charlie figures out it only lasts all day somehow) so Alastor sticks with reader and helps her with her duties at the hotel, never leaving her side, at the end of the day before he goes to bed

Angel teases tiny Alastor about reader being his mommy que reader blushing and sputtering from reader only for Alastor to turn to Angel with disgust and determination on his face to proudly announce to Angel that reader is gonna be HIS WIFE INSTEAD only for husk to scoff in the background and says something about Alastor being a smiley freak or something for Alastor to doubt that reader will marry him, that thats never gonna happen, only for reader to kiss Alastor on the forehead and declare that that doesn't change anything because Alastor has always owned her heart, something sweet???? To reassure kid Alastor then reader takes Alastor to his hotel room to sleep, to later on in the night to sneak into readers bed because 'momma cuddles with me till I fall asleep', sleepy cuddles, soothing humming for child Alastor to ask before he falls asleep if reader really will marry him when he's older and Reader half asleep herself and full of love for the man he'll grow to be says yes, but to take her out first or get her flowers ya know???

When reader wakes the next morning to flowers surrounding her bed and her favorite breakfast presented to her with a bashful adult Alastor saying he's kept his side of the deal now its readers turn, readers faces lights up and smiles big enough to hurt her cheeks and they date and get married ☺️😣

(I'm sorry it's a weird request and soooooo fucking long but .....please..)

A/N I literally love you and your requests. Hi. Also I am making her a rabbit again because I feel like that would be something that a kid would not find scary and would be very excited about as a demon form.

Mishap of Magic (Alastor x Chubby!Rabbit Demon!Reader)

Pairing: Alastor x Reader

Warnings: Nothing except that Alastor is a little kid for most of this fic.

Word Count: 3,463

Master Lists:

Master Lists 

Hazbin Hotel Master List

Click here and leave a comment if you want to be added to any taglists or send me an ask.

It wasn't the first time it had happened to Alastor but, it had certainly been a while since the last time he'd had to deal with such an issue. Magic was a fickle thing, obstinate at the best of times. He had found a certain agreement of sorts with the metaphysical but, it still backfired on occasion.

Alastor had been trying to fix the wall -- the fucking wall. Somehow, every time there was an issue with the hotel, this same exterior wall was involved. It was inconceivable and deeply irritating, especially now that it had been the trigger. Alastor could feel the world shifting, feel himself shrinking and then, nothing.

"Uh, what the fuck?" Vaggie broke the silence, stress seeping into her voice.

"Oh my gosh! Vaggie!" Charlie exclaimed, grabbing onto her girlfriend's arm and shaking it violently, a bright smile lighting up her face, "He looks like a little kid!"

"Damn," Angel laughed lightly, "who woulda guessed the strawberry pimp was actually a cute at one point in time."

Alastor looked around in confusion. A tangle of limbs, wild creatures and bright colors. Husk smirked, trying to hold a derisive laugh at bay as he placed a bottle on the shelf of the bar.

"Charlie," Vaggie sighed, turning to her overexcited partner who at the moment was cooing over how small Alastor had become, "you do realize we have to change him back."

All the joy fell from Charlie's face in an instant.

"Hey, uh, little guy?" Pentious began, awkwardly advancing towards Alastor, "You wouldn't happen to know how we can fix this? I-"

"Stay away!"

His voice was small and shrill, panicked as Alastor backed away from Pentious' advancement. Sir Pentious stopped in his tracks and Charlie let go of Vaggie, coming up beside him.

"It's okay, Alastor." she said in a tone of voice that was trying very hard to be everything except for panicked, which is what it actually was, "He's not going to attack you.''

It became evident almost immediately that that had in fact been the wrong thing for Charlie to say. Alastor's eyes filled with sudden tears.

"Where... stay away from me!" he exclaimed, "My momma told me not to talk to strangers."

Charlie and Vaggie exchanged a glance and Charlie sighed.

"We're not strangers, we're you're friends. I am Charlie, that is Vaggie, Husk is in the bar, this is Angel, and here is Sir Pentious. Remember?"

"I don't know any of you scary things!" Alastor exclaimed, tears beginning to drip from his wide, wet eyes and roll down his cheeks, "I... I want my mommy. Where is my mommy?"

"Oh! No no no!" Charlie exclaimed, trying to reach a comforting hand out to the child but he backed away again.

"Where is my mama!" he yelled, now absolutely sobbing, "I want... I want..."

He sniffled, trying to catch his breath as he looked frantically around the room. Charlie turned to Vaggie, pulling at her hair.

"What do we do!" she asked her girlfriend who shrugged, as much at a loss of how to handle the situation as her partner was.

"Man, if I 'da known he was this cute and... and frail under that whole persona all along." Angel sighed wistfully, crossing his lower set of arms.

This time Husk really couldn't stop the laugh that left him. Before anyone could ask what was so funny, if he knew anything about what was going on, the doors to the hotel opened and Y/n waltzed in. Her arms were laden with bags and she wore a bright, sunny smile.

"Al!" she called out, closing the door gently behind her, "You'll never guess what I found at the market!"

"Um, Y/n?" Sir Pentious tentatively began, taking a step towards her as she turned to the group.

"Fresh strawberries!"

As her eyes fell on the scene before her, the smile fell from her face, replaced with an expression of alarm. The bags fell from her grasp, spilling groceries across the floor as she rushed to the young Alastor's side. His mouth was slightly open, tears still falling openly from his eyes, as she crouched before him. The white skirt of her dress pooled gently on the floor around her feet as she raised a handkerchief to his face, gently patting his cheeks with its edge.

"What on earth is going on?" she asked softly, her voice laced delicately with concern.

"Well, Alastor was fixing the wall and then he just... poofed? I don't know! We don't know what happened and we don't know how to fix it and he keeps asking for his mom and... and... and..." Charlie trailed off, looking around helplessly at her companions.

Y/n's gentle gaze never once left Alastor's. She smiled softly at him.

"I see, are you lost?"

Alastor nodded weakly, sniffing once.

"And there are all these big scary monsters around!" he told her.

"Ah, I see." Y/n sagely replied, "Am I a big scary monster too?"

She didn't mean it in any way except as an attempt to assess the situation further. Alastor's cheeks flushed slightly pink as he shook his head, looking away bashfully. Y/n smiled softly, turning his face gently back to her.

"Would you like to stay with me until we can figure out what is going on?"

The tears had stopped now and Alastor nodded enthusiastically. Y/n dabbed the last remains of saltwater from his cheeks, slipping the handkerchief into her pocket. In a single, swift and practiced motion, Y/n lifted Alastor up, resting him on her hip. His hands immediately went to one of her floppy ears, running his little hands over it in awe.

"Bunny." he stated and Y/n nodded.

"Yeah, I am just like a bunny, okay?"

Alastor met her eyes.

"You're pretty like a bunny too!" he announced proudly and Y/n felt her cheeks grow slightly warm.

"Ah, what a little charmer." she noted, tapping his nose lightly and Alastor giggled.

"How are you so good with him?" Angel asked and Y/n turned towards him as Alastor continued to fiddle with her ear.

"What do you mean?"

"He just kept crying when we were trying to help."

Y/n shrugged slightly.

"I was the oldest growing up. I always had to take care of my baby cousins and stuff like that. Besides, little kids are the sweetest a this age!"

Angel's eyes flicked between Y/n and her enthusiasm and little Alastor who seemed absolutely awestruck in her arms.

"Yeah." he scoffed, "That is all it is."

"Now, Alastor." Y/n hummed, turning to face the boy who immediately met her gaze, his earnest air only endearing her to him further, "I have some work to get done, I cook here at the hotel. Do you want to come help me?"

"Uh-huh." he nodded vigorously and Y/n smiled.

"Well, that's a relief cause, you know, I could really use your help."

"Really?"

Alastor's eyes lit up at the notion, that she needed him, that it wasn't just an empty offer.

"Yeah I could." Y/n confirmed, "How else am I supposed to know if the fruit is ripe or the meal is good if you don't try it for me first?"

Alastor giggled and Y/n turned, glancing at her bags still splayed out on the floor.

"Pen, can you help me with these?"

Immediately, the snake demon agreed, grabbing the fallen produce and placing it back into the bags before hoisting them onto his shoulders. The trio had made it about halfway across the lobby to the service door that lead to the kitchen when Y/n paused, looking back at Charlie over her shoulder.

"Charls, I'd quiz Husk about this if I were you." she advised gently, "He seems far too pleased at the situation to not know exactly what is going on."

The day sped by in a whirl of something akin to unbound joy. It was a peaceful reminder of the person she had been to take care of Alastor like this. They had always been close, he didn't own her soul or anything but Y/n and Alastor had been friends for years. When he had asked her to come help out at the hotel, she had jumped at the opportunity to spend time with him after so many years.

Despite their closeness, neither knew all too much about the other. There was always an unspoken barrier of sorts in the way. For Y/n, it was a mild attraction to the man. He was a moralist at heart with a strict code completely of his own he always stuck to and Y/n admired him for that. She wasn't sure what the disconnect was on Alastor's side but, in the moment, she didn't care. She had learned more about the man through this strange experience than she had ever hoped to, it was a gift.

It was his capacity for love, she realized as she lead him into the lobby to say his goodnights. Y/n had never realized how deeply Alastor cared about the people in his life or the world around him, he hid it so well as an adult. Child Alastor had no pretenses, he was completely and entirely himself with nothing held back. In a weird way, it almost strengthened the feelings she had for him as an adult, being allowed to experience him like this.

All day, he had trailed after her, doing his absolute best to complete every task she assigned him and talking all the while about how much he loved his home and his mom. It was sweet, it was endearing, it was verging on dangerous. Y/n tried not to think about it as she held his small hand.

The pair came to a stop by the bar where the rest of the hotel's residents were sharing a drink. Charlie had found out earlier from Husk that this change in Alastor should only last a day and Y/n found herself nearly morose at the idea. She loved Alastor as a man, respected him, but he lost that openness he had had as a child, she realized. It was a shame that come sunrise, she wouldn't be able to have such open communication with the man again, a shame that the only open communication she would ever have with him was when he was a child incapable of adult though. Y/n squeezed his hand gently.

"Let's say goodnight, okay?"

Alastor looked doubtfully up at Y/n, still put off by the rest of the gang.

"They're your friends, I promise. Would I lie to you?"

Alastor thought it over before shaking his head slightly. He turned to face the group.

"Good night." he announced, his voice trembling just the slightest bit.

"Good job." Y/n hummed and Alastor smiled in pride.

"Damn, is this how you guys always are?" Angel laughed, taking a sip from his drink, evidently already intoxicated, "I mean, I knew you were friends before you came here, but are you always such a mom to him?"

"No!" Y/n indignantly replied, her cheeks flushing slightly pink, "We're just friends."

"Nah," Angel smirked after a moment, "you're totally his mom."

Y/n opened her mouth to reply when Alastor let go of her hand, stepping in front of her with his hands on his hips.

"Y/n is not my mom." he insisted to Angel who raised his eyebrows.

"Yeah, then what is she?" the spider demon asked and Y/n glared at him.

"Y/n is the prettiest ever and when I grow up she's gonna be my wife!" Alastor proudly announced, "She is nice and gives the best hugs."

Angel and Husk both broke out into peals of laughter.

"Like you could land a girl like her." Husk scoffed.

"What do you mean?" Alastor asked, his words slurring slightly together from exhaustion.

"Hate to break it to you kid, but when you grow up, your creepy ass could never."

Alastor frowned deeply at this remark. He looked back at Y/n, his eyes bleeding helplessness. She felt her heart crack and crouched down beside him. Tucking his hair behind his ears, Y/n placed a soft kiss on his forehead.

"Don't listen to Husk." she smiled gently at him, "You have always had a place in my heart."

Alastor's face lit up at this and he turned back to Husk. Taking Y/n's hand back in his, he stuck his tongue out at the cat demon who rolled his eyes in response.

Once up in Alastor's room, Y/n tucked him in to bed and told him a story. Alastor's sleepy eyes struggled to stay open and when she moved to leave, it took some convincing to make him let go of her arm. With promises she would see him first thing in the morning, Y/n let the door close gently behind her and let out a sigh. She had forgotten how much work kids could be, she was exhausted.

She had barley made it back to her room, barley crawled into bed, when there was a soft knock at her door. With a sigh, she threw the covers from her legs and walked to the door, opening it with an irritated expression which softened the moment she saw who stood on the other side.

"What's going on, honey?" she asked, crouching down to Alastor's level and cupping his cheek gently in her soft hand.

"I can't sleep." he bashfully replied, "Momma cuddles me until I fall asleep."

"I see." Y/n hummed, getting to her feet and stepping to the side so he could enter.

Alastor looked up at Y/n in doubt and she gave him a nod of encouragement. It was all he needed to rush into the room and jump up onto her bed, snuggling down into the pile of covers. Y/n watched him for a moment, smiling softly, before closing the door and joining him.

Immediately, Alastor wrapped himself in her arms, snuggling into her chest. Y/n was frozen for a moment in indecision, but tiredness prevailed and in her sleepy state, all that mattered was that it was Alastor. Her oldest friend, the one who had never failed her. She pulled him close, resting her chin on his head.

"You're so comfy." Alastor mumbled through a yawn and Y/n chuckled.

"Its because I know how to enjoy all that life and the afterlife has to offer." she hummed softly in response, her breath tickling the top of his head, "Most men would prefer someone who looks different than me but, luckily I am not existing for men."

The pair fell silent for a moment. Sleep pulled at the edges of Y/n's ears, dragging her eyelids down. She hummed a gentle tune, a lullaby she had long since forgotten the words to but that she could hear her own mother in.

"Well, those men are stupid." Alastor grumpily replied, maneuvering himself around in Y/n's grasp so he faced her, "You look like a fairy."

Y/n cracked her eyes open, ruffling Alastor's hair slightly.

"Why thank you, I do try." she smiled.

"And I meant it."

"Meant what?"

Her eyes were closed again, her voice dreamy.

"When I grow up, I am going to marry you."

"Oh, are you now."

"Yes." Alastor insisted, and in his insistence, through the shrillness of his childlike tone, Y/n could hear him as an adult, as the man she knew, "When I am grown up, I am going to ask you to marry me. Will... you would say yes, right?"

Who would have guessed, the feared and decisive Radio Demon could doubt. Y/n smiled.

"Well, you can't just ask a girl to marry you right off the bat."

"You can't?"

There was a genuine confusion in his voice, Y/n had expected nothing less from a child. Still, she couldn't help but view him through the lens of his adult self in this moment. Maybe it was the exhaustion, the proximity, the dark, how lovely he was when he had nothing to protect himself from, when he did not yet know of the filter he needed in order to conduct himself in the world and not get fucked over by it.

"Nope." Y/n shook her head slightly.

"Why not?"

"Well, you have to court her first."

"Court her?"

"You know, ask her on dates, buy her flowers: woo her."

"Well then I will do that too."

The last thing Y/n remembered before the world gave way to sleep was Alastor asking what her favorite flower was.

"Hyacinths." she had told him, "The purple ones. But don't you dare buy them for me unless you have something to apologize for because they ask for forgiveness. Instead, buy me peonies, they are for new love."

The heat of Hell's false sun was what woke her. Y/n grumbled, rolling over in bed, the course of the day before re-materializing in her head. She smiled softly at the memory, a certain sadness creeping in at the fact that she would probably never be that vulnerable with the man again.

A faint, almost peppery smell reached her nose and Y/n cracked her eyes open. Around her was a world of soft pinks and whites, cascading petals and the most beautiful display of protracted death. She gasped slightly, sitting up in bed. Looking around her small room, she realized it was filled to the brim with peonies in different stages of life. As her eyes traveled to the foot of the bed, she found Alastor standing there, his cheeks flushed and a tray in his hands. On the tray was a stack of pancakes, all cut into the shape of flowers to match. Y/n laughed lightly, smiling up at him from where she sat in bed.

"What's all this?" she asked and his cheeks grew brighter still.

Alastor looked away, clearing his throat.

"I'm keeping my side of the deal."

Y/n searched her mind, looking for any trace of what he could possibly mean.

"The deal... oh!" it suddenly hit her, the sleep riddled conversation they had had the night before.

Her cheeks flushed pink, mirroring his and picking up the colors of the flowers he had surrounded her with. She smiled brightly at Alastor, pulling herself from the bed. The hem of her nightgown rippled gently against her legs as she approached him. With grace, she plucked a strawberry from the plate and popped it in her mouth.

"Are you asking me out on a date?" she grinned coyly up at him.

Alastor rolled his eyes.

"I'm... doing the things so... just..."

"Alastor."

"What?"

His discomfort was palpable, unfamiliar. She reveled in it.

"Do you actually like me?"

"I thought I told you. You know, when-"

"I thought that was just mindless chatter." she interrupted, "Little kids are always saying stuff like that."

"Well, I wasn't."

Y/n laughed and Alastor placed the tray carefully on the edge of the bed, turning back to her.

"Did I misinterpret what you said?"

"Not at all." Y/n said, taking a step closer to him.

"So you will marry me?"

She laughed again, she couldn't help herself. Y/n could tell that if Alastor was able to do anything but smile, he would be scowling at her reaction to his sincere question.

"Ask me out on a date."

"Bu-"

"Ask me out on a date!" she insisted and Alastor sighed.

"Fine. Would you..." he took a deep breath, nerves running wild, "would you like to go out... with me..."

"Oh wow, so confident." Y/n teased.

"Y/n." Alastor warned and her smile widened even further.

"Yes, Al. Yes, Alastor, I would love to go out on a date with you."

"Wait, really?"

"Yes." Y/n nodded, her hands clasped behind her back as she swayed slightly on her feet, "I will."

Before she could register what was happening, Y/n was in Alastor's arms. He lifted her off her feet, spinning her around.

"Wait!" she shrieked, "Alastor, put me down! Aren't I too heavy?"

"Not at all, my dear." he hummed, holding her close now.

"Still, put me down!" she bashfully requested and at last he conceded, her feet finding the cool of the wood once again, "How long have you been... you know."

"That, my dear, is for me to know."

He tapped her nose gently and one of her ears shifted in response. Y/n crossed her arms.

"Not fair." she whined.

"Eat." Alastor commanded, unable to be moved on this point, "Meet me downstairs after. We're going out."

----

Tags:

@willowshadenox @i-love-jafar @elfyeet 

@reader3

[butchreg]

sleep troubles ( ~ 900 words )

requested by @f1shb0n3sz . sorry this took awhile. i've never really thought about cassandra honestly so this was a welcome challenge for me. i did my best to characterize her well but i'm not super familiar with her character so apologies if she is ooc. i don't really plan on doing a lot for her as i'm just not as familiar with her but here ya go : ) if any of the baby lore is inaccurate i apologize i'm not particularly familiar with babies (*_ _)人. i hope this is okay ! a little shorter than usual i apologize. arcane masterlist here , upcoming list here

summary : cassandra helps you , who struggles with insomnia , get to sleep. a cg ! cassandra kiramman fic.

tags / warnings : sfw agere , arcane agere , boyre , babyre , mommy ! cassandra , little ! masc reader , reader struggles with insomnia , fluff , minor hurt comfort — a bit of crying and anxious thoughts from baby but mommy calms you right down , arcane x reader , talk of baby ! caitlyn , bottle feeding , not proofread </3

Cassandra walks into your room, having heard your continuous babbles over the baby monitor. The councilor looks tired, dark circles beginning to form beneath her striking teal blue eyes. “Now now, my darling,” she begins to scold gently. “Look at the time, love. Time for little ones like you to be asleep.” You continue to babble, excited to see your mommy, reaching out your arms towards her. She sighs but comes over to your crib which she had specially made by commission for you. 

She scoops you up, sitting you on her lap in the rocking chair next to your crib. She bounces you on her lap, before giving you a bit of a stern look. “Why aren’t we asleep, hmm?” She’s concerned, it’s well past midnight by now, pushing one o’clock. She recalls that when Caitlyn was this small, barely a year and a half, she had slept nearly constantly. Like clockwork at 6:45 every evening she’d come sleepily toddling, half scooting by means of a coffee table or armchair, ready for a kiss and a cuddle from mommy, falling asleep almost the second she was placed in her crib. You, however, as she’s come to know, are a different story. 

You whine. It’s not that you don’t want to sleep. But you just can’t. “Use your words please. Can you do that for Mummy?” she prompts you. “A whine simply won’t do on its own.”You grumpily huff, wishing she could read your mind. Words are hard when you’re so small. She tuts at you, chuckling a bit. “Now now, let’s not get grumpy. Mummy can’t help you if you don’t speak up. Aren’t you feeling sleepy?” 

You shrug. You are feeling rather tired but sleep just won’t come! She waits patiently for you to speak. She’s quite no nonsense like that; you know you won’t be able to worm your way out of explaining the situation to her. “‘Somnia,” you mumble, a bit embarrassed. You squirm in Cassandra’s lap, mind straying to the possibility of her being ashamed, or embarrassed by you. Perhaps she’ll think you’re too difficult, or maybe even a bad boy. 

You begin to fuss at these thoughts. She’s surprised when you open your mouth, beginning to cry. She gasps quietly, alarmed by your cries. She brings you closer to you, rubbing your back soothingly. “Oh hush now, my little love. You’re okay, everything is okay,” she soothes softly. “You have insomnia, hmm? Is that correct?” 

You nod slowly, sniffling as you wipe your tired teary eyes. “Shhh, how about I help you get to sleep tonight, prince?  Would that be alright?” You nod, appreciatively, babbling a bit in response. 

“Mamamababa,” you say, and she chucks your chin, smiling. 

“There’s my sweet boy,” she says lovingly. She thinks for a moment. “How about I make you a bottle of some nice sleepytime tea? That would be quite nice, wouldn’t it now?” You cock your head, pondering that idea for a minute. Tea? You don’t drink a lot of that, it’s more for grownups like Mommy. You nod eagerly, clinging to Cassandra’s ruffled white undershirt so she has no choice but to stand up with you in her arms, placing you on her hip. 

Typically she’ll have the servants make your bottles, being far too busy with council activities during the day to make them herself. By now, though, everyone is asleep in their quarters aside from the two of you. She puts on the kettle, pacing the large kitchen as she bounces you on her hip waiting for the tea to be ready. 

She hums softly to you. She has a sweet but rusty singing voice, not having used it in years. She sticks to humming a soft tune that Caitlyn used to adore. The humming soothes you even further, and you begin to feel sleepier, closing your eyes while you wait for Mommy to get your bottle ready. 

A short while later she’s pouring the warm tea into a bottle, tightly fastening the top, smiling proudly to herself. She carries you back to your room, situating herself and you back in the rocking chair. You make grabby hands for the bottle and she experimentally tests it to make sure it’s a proper temperature. “Mmmm, it tastes nice. Perfect for my little love,” she comments, allowing you to taste your first sip of the warm liquid. 

You giggle, squirming with delight. It does taste good. She boops your nose and you smile around the bottle, suckling at it eagerly. Before it’s even half empty you feel your eyelids beginning to droop. “Someone’s pretty tired, hmm?” the councilor teases gently. You hum in response. “You all done, sweet boy?” 

“Mmmmm,” you hum, nodding slightly. She picks you back up, placing the bottle on top of your dresser and gently spinning the mobile above your crib. “Ababa…” you babble sleepily. She carefully places you in bed, tucking you in snuggly, giving both you and your lion stuffie a gentle kiss on the forehead. 

She sits back down on the rocking chair, rocking back and forth slowly, determined to stay with you until you’re fast asleep. She softly begins to sing you a lullaby, hearing you sleepily moving in your bed. She sings you the one about the mockingbird, Caitlyn always liked that one. Her voice is a bit husky but you don’t have any complaints, allowing yourself to drift off to the sound of your mommy’s lullaby.

[dontaskmemybias]

Nightmares and Wet Dreams

Pairing: Non Idol!Hwang Hyunjin x afab reader Request: Yes Theme: Friends/Roommates to Lovers, Sharing a Bed. Contains: Oral Sex (F&M receiving), marking, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it folks). Word Count: 2,049 words Note: MINORS DNI!!! This is a work of fiction and does not portray any of the members irl. Sorry this took so long, I loved the idea and I hope you enjoy it! Leave a comment if you liked it I like reading what y'all say 🥰

"Can't sleep?" Hyunjin mumbles sleepily when he sees you standing in his doorway before glancing at the clock that reads one a.m.

"Had a bad dream, can I stay with you for a while?" Hyunjin was used to this, you frequently had bad dreams that led you to coming to his room late at night so he just smiled at you sweetly and opened the covers for you. You got under the covers and he pulled your body close to his, stroking your hair to try and calm you down.

"It's okay sweetheart, I'm here, just try to relax and get some rest." You hummed in response and nuzzled your face into his chest.

"Thanks Jinnie, I don't know what I would do without you." He smiled and kept petting your head until you fell back asleep.

~✨~

You woke up again a few hours later, the nightmare had stopped but you could still feel the adrenaline running through your body. You and Hyunjin had moved a bit so that now he was spooning you from behind. You smiled at the familiar comfortable feeling of him wrapped around you and tried to let sleep come back to your body. You froze however when you heard a whimper come from your friend. You brought your hand up to his arm, stroking the skin comfortingly, worried he may be having a nightmare. Then you heard him let out a moan.

Definitely not a nightmare.

Hyunjin's grip on you tightened and you gasped when you felt his semi-hard dick rub against your ass. Your face heated up at the action.

"Y/N." Hyunjin moaned almost directly in your ear.

Your brain started running at full speed. Was your best friend having a wet dream about you? You rubbed your thighs together a bit, suddenly feeling very hot and bothered.

You felt Hyunjin's hand slide a bit further around your body and another small groan left his lips. Should you wake him up? If you did what should you do? Pretend you didn't hear anything or tell him what happened? It's not like you had never seen Hyunjin that way, he was the most beautiful man you'd ever laid eyes on and during certain lonely nights he was the only thing that could get you off.

But did he feel that way about you? I guess there was some hard evidence that he does share the feeling pressed against your ass right now. You finally decided that you would wake him and see what to do from there.

"Jinnie, wake up sleepyhead." You shuffled so that you were facing him and ran your fingers across his cheek. He mumbled some incoherent words and you moved your hand to run through his hair.

"Jinnie? Wake up." He grumbled and tightened his arms around you before slowly blinking open his eyes.

"Y/N? Is everything okay?" He grumbled, his low sleepy voice sending shivers down your spine.

"Yeah, you just, whimpered in your sleep. I was worried you were having a nightmare." You half-lied. Even in the dark you could see the flush spread across his cheeks.

"You're sweet, but I'm okay, I was having a really good dream actually. No need to worry." He smiled at you and started rubbing gentle circles on your back.

"What was the dream about?" He froze and cleared his throat before scooting his butt out a little bit, realizing he was now fully hard and trying to hide it from you.

"Oh... I-I don't really remember." He stammered out. Cute. He seemed a little flustered, although, you were as well. Still remembering the way he moaned out your name in that beautiful breathless whisper. You decided to prod a little further, wanting confirmation that what you had heard was correct.

"Really? I think I may have been in your dream, I heard you say my name. Is that ringing any bells?" You carded your hand through his hair. His body was tense. He had said your name? What could he do? It's not like he could just tell you that in his dream he was railing you on this very bed, marking you as his like he has wanted to do for ages. But the way you mischievously smirked at him made him think that there was more to it.

"Did I- did I say anything else?" He hoped that he hadn't, he didn't want to make you uncomfortable. But the way you were caressing his hair and you shuffled just the slightest bit closer to him made him think you were definitely not uncomfortable. But there was something about the way you were acting that made him think there was more to the story.

"No you didn't really say anything else." The emphasis you put on say made his stomach twist.

"Did I do something?" His voice was barely above a whisper now. You face was mere inches away from his own.

The way Hyunjin was now breathing heavily, his eyes semi-lidded while he looked at you gave you the confirmation you needed to be bold.

"You make the prettiest noises when you're all worked up Jinnie." You brought your hand down and caressed his cheek. He closed his eyes at the contact and sighed.

"Fuck don't tell me that angel." The nickname had you swooning. You closed your eyes and let out a content hum.

"Why not?" You all but whispered.

"You make me think I might actually have a chance with you." Your eyes shot open to find Hyunjin staring back into your own.

"You do."

At your words Hyunjin closed the distance and kissed you passionately. You let a small moan escape and he moved his hand from your back to your ass to pull you in closer to him. You put a leg around him and felt his hard-on pressing against your clothed core. Hyunjin let out a deep groan and deepened the kiss, tongue clashing with your own. Your hands roamed through his hair and down his back, caressing every part of him that you could reach.

He pulled away for a second to look into your eyes, he brought a hand up and cupped your jaw.

"You are so beautiful, if you'll allow me I'd like to show you what my dream was about." You clenched at his words and smiled.

"I'd love that."

Hyunjin smiled and laid you back on the bed, hovering over you he began planting kisses down your jaw and neck, sucking and biting, leaving his mark on you. Your breath was staggered, letting out small moans whenever he would hit your sensitive spots. He tugged off your shirt and tossed it on the ground behind you. He took his time kissing down your exposed chest and tummy until he reached the hem of your shorts.

He looked up at you with a teasing look in his eyes as he played with the hem of your shorts. You breathed heavily looking down at him with a smile on your face. He finally, slowly, began pulling your sleep shorts down revealing your cotton panties with a little wet spot on them.

"Fuck, I am the luckiest man on the planet right now." He threw your shorts away and started slowly moving his palms up your legs. You normally would've snapped at him for taking so long but something about the way he looked up at you with blown out pupils and a sexy smirk told you it would be worth the wait.

He finally after what felt like ages reached your clothed core. He used two fingers to rub up and down your soaked panties and you let out a breathy moan at the pressure. He smirked at you and after playing a bit he finally pulled off your underwear and threw them across the room.

"You have such a pretty pussy angel, I can't wait to taste you." Your breath hitched in your throat when Hyunjin brought himself to hover over your cunt, his warm breath on your entrance had you eager for more.

"I'm gonna make you cum so hard the only thing you'll remember is my name how does that sound angel?" You didn't have time to respond before his beautiful lips were on you. You always knew Hyunjin to be a passionate man but the way he was eating you out made you think that this is what he was really meant for. Moans and declarations of his name fell past your lips uncontrollably. You had never received head like this. Hyunjin was analyzing you the whole time, figuring out what made you shake and moan loader and abusing it constantly. You felt the band in your lower stomach tighten.

"FUCK Jinnie right there don't stop, I-I'm gonna cum!" He doubled down on his efforts, desperate to send you over the edge.

"J-JINNIE FUCKFUCK CUMMING!" You screamed as he sent you over the edge. Panting and shaking he didn't stop his assault until you had stopped writhing.

"Jesus baby that was so hot, I love when you call me Jinnie." He grinned, your juices coating the lower half of his face. You finally felt your breathing slow down as he made his way back up to kiss your lips. He moved so he could whisper in your ear.

"We aren't done yet though angel, I promised we would reenact my dream." He bit your earlobe gently before pulling back and stripping himself. Your eyes were raking over his figure, you'd seen him shirtless plenty of times over the years but never in this context. He kept his eyes on you as he pulled his sweats down and you could see how hard he was from the prominent tent in his boxers. You bit your lip as you sat up and grabbed the hem of his boxers.

"May I?" He smirked and nodded. You slowly pulled his boxers down and let his cock spring free from its confines. He smiled and cupped your jaw, bringing you in for a kiss. He followed you back down onto the bed and lined himself up with your entrance before he stopped for a second and looked at you, mildly panicked.

"I-I don't have a condom." You smiled and kissed him.

"It's okay, I'm clean and I have an IUD, if you're clean too we don't need one."

"Fuck." He whispered. Then he began to push into you. His forehead pressed to yours as you both moaned at the feeling of him inside you. Once he bottomed out he gave you a second to get used to the feeling before picking up the pace.

"Fuck I've wanted to do this for so long angel you are so perfect for me." He moaned out.

"R-really?" You asked, a little breathless from how good he was fucking you.

"Really." He looked into your eyes and bent down to kiss you, it was a sweet kiss given the circumstances but it quickly got heated as he started thrusting harder.

"Fuck angel I don't think I'll last much longer you feel so fucking good like this."

"I-I'm -fuck- close Jinnie." Hearing you were close he started fucking you harder. He brought one hand down to play with your clit and it sent you over the edge.

"FUCK cumming Ji-Jinnie!" You saw stars for the second time that night as your best friend-turned-lover fucked you through it. His hips started stuttering and you knew he was close too.

"Shit angel I'm gonna cum where do you want me?"

"Mouth Jinnie wanna taste you!" Hyunjin looked completely fucked out when you said that and pulled out. You sat up on your knees and took him into your mouth and began sucking.

"Fucking hell angel you're so good at that -shit- I'm gonna cum." You doubled down on your efforts and after a few sucks he came in your mouth. You swallowed and smiled up at him, fully satisfied.

You both laid back down and Hyunjin wrapped his arms around you to bring you close to him.

"So.." He seemed a little flustered and nervous. Cute.

"Do you um, would you want to be my girlfriend?" He said it quickly, afraid you'd react poorly. Instead you wrapped yourself tighter around him.

"I'd love that Jinnie."

[causenessus]

Nightmares. | Bungou Stray Dogs

inc: dazai, chuuya, tecchou

written in 2nd pov (female reader implied at least for chuuya)

song recc: roslyn by bon iver

word count: 1064 words

summary: "how do they take care of you when you have a nightmare?"

sorry if they all seem the same D: i tried to make them all unique and i can see the difference between each character in how they would treat u but i know it's small i'm sorry they're all just such green flags and would be the sweetest <3

dazai

has had so many nightmares himself he knows just how to take care of you

having someone with him at night helped reduce the stress and the number of ones he has <3

you’ll wake up from a nightmare, crying out as you shoot up and he’s there for you from the very start, sitting up as well and shushing you, pulling you to his chest

“it’s okay, it’s okay,” he kept repeating as he drew your head near to his chest. “deep breaths, bella,” he encouraged softly, holding your face so that you were looking directly into his eyes while he gave you a gentle smile. he ran his hands through your hair, smoothing it out until your breathing calmed down

is super patient with you throughout the whole process, will not act sleepy in the slightest so that you don’t feel bad for waking him up or anything else

“ ‘m sorry I woke you,” your voice shook as you tried to take a deep breath, wiping the tears away from your eyes.

he took your hands off your face, using his own to brush away your tears with all the care in the world. “don’t be sorry, I was half awake anyway. take your time, love.”

he’ll offer to listen if you want to talk about it, but he understands if you’re not ready yet

tries to coax you back to sleep soon after because he wants you to rest

but he knows from experience how hard it can be when your mind is racing

the reason it’s helped him so much to sleep with someone though is bc it can take your mind off the dream <3

he’ll position you against his chest and between his legs while he rests against the headboard of the bed. he’ll intertwine his arms with yours, rubbing circles on your wrists while he hums softly to distract you

if you’re feeling sensitive to noise, he’ll place his hands over your ears instead, using his thumbs to rub the sides of your head

he’s there for whatever you need him to do. during your first nightmare with him, he’ll still be figuring out how you react to them. after that, he'll remember exactly what you need and want from him. he wants to make sure you feel safe and comfortable no matter what <3

chuuya

wakes up first while you’re still tossing and turning in your dream

he’ll sit up and lean over, waking you as gently as he can. he’ll cup your face as you wake up, brushing anyway any tears with warm hands

“hey, hey, it’s okay. you’re okay. it’s just a bad dream. I’m right here. you’re safe,” he whispered softly as you woke up shaking, your breathing erratic

he kisses away the rest of your tears, touching you so gently and with so much love

asks if you want to talk about it and if you need anything else which he’ll be happy to get for you

afterward, he’ll pull you close to his chest, one hand on your head and the other around your waist, making you feel secure and protected

I think he’d be the type who would keep talking the whole time, distracting you from your thoughts. he’ll talk you through everything he’s doing, he’ll continue to comfort you, and will talk about any other random thing once you both have laid back down

probably tries to make some jokes a little bit before you head back to sleep as well to make you feel better

“sometimes, that stupid dazai shows up in my dreams and I just know it’s not a coincidence. there’s no way that scheming blockhead doesn’t have some mysterious way of communicating and entering people’s dreams. and he does it just to piss me off. ugh, just thinking about it makes me upset,” he ran a hand through his hair, smiling when you let out a small laugh, wiping away the last of your tears with the back of your hand.

he took your hand in his own and kissed it softly, “there’s my pretty girl. see? you’re safe, nothing bad is gonna happen.”

tecchou

does not wake up

you wake up from your nightmare, eyes bleary and heart racing. the only thing you want is to be in his arms so you wake him

once he sees your tears though he’s up immediately, hands on your face as he wipes them away, “oh angel, what’s wrong?”

you place your hand over his own, “just a nightmare…I’m sorry I didn’t know what else to do.”

“nothing to be sorry about,” he says softly, a smile on his face as if you had said something funny, “that’s what I’m here for. I’m glad you woke me up.”

he suggests making a warm drink to calm you down if you’re up for it 

in his experiences, he’s found it best to get up and change his surroundings in order to get his mind off a bad dream

if you say yes, he’ll make you something to drink before sitting next to you in the kitchen. he’ll be with you the whole time, telling you that he’s willing to listen if you want to talk about it or anything else if you don’t want to think about it

will have a hand on your thigh or back, rubbing it slowly to comfort you

when you both head back to bed, he’ll hold you close to him, one hand intertwined with yours to let you know he’s there while the other runs through your hair <3

if you don’t want to get up from the bed, that’s okay too, he’ll ask you what you want him to do and makes sure your every need is taken care of <3

kisses your forehead as you both lay back down, then draws patterns across your skin with one hand. the other one flat against your lower back to keep you pressed against him

if you’re still a little scared, he’ll continue to comfort you and reassure you that it’s okay. he’ll wipe away any more tears and stay awake the whole time. he tries to make sure he hears your breathing slow and that you’ve fallen back asleep before he closes his own eyes again to make sure that you get the rest you deserve <3

[number1mingyustan]

-Cuffing Season-

Your Call

boyfriend!mingyu x fem!reader

Warnings: established relationship, cursing, explicit smut, mutual masturbation (m+f), virtual sex, size kink, fingering (f.)

Summary: Even a thousand miles away you still have the same effects on him

Word Count: 1.8k

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(a/n: i'm baaaack!! im so sorry for going MIA I was busy with school and now that I'm on break I've had literally no motivation to write but I've got a few more drafts I'm working on so expect me to be more active!)

The hotel door swings open and Mingyu walks through it, hand already pulling at the navy blue tie draped around his neck.

He undoes it with one hand before dropping it onto the carpeted hotel floor. He lets out a sigh of pure exhaustion and leans his back against the wall as his briefcase meets the floor.

He’s been in meetings all day and tired can’t even describe what he’s feeling right now. He’s away from you in Tokyo on a business trip and he’s miserable. His days prior to this were light, a meeting here and there and a couple of conventions. But today?

Back-to-back meetings with potential investors and clients have worn him out. He hasn’t even gotten the chance to call you yet today.

For the two weeks, he’s called you at least three times and you’ve texted back and forth every day. Now it’s nearing 1am and he hasn’t spoken to you at all.

He strips himself down to his boxers and lays down on top of the bed. He scrambles for his phone and immediately dials your number.

You pick up on the first ring. “Gyu?”

“Hi baby,” He rasps.

"Was beginning to think you forgot about me," you pout.

"Never, I was just swamped. I knew it was gonna be a heavy day, but I had literally no time to myself. I just now got back to the hotel," he sighs.

"You work so hard babe," You say. "I'm proud of you, but take it easy."

He nods. "It'll only be this bad for the next few days. I think it'll be worth it though, seems like a lot of good can come out of this for the company."

You shift on the bed, making yourself more comfortable as you lie down. "That's good Gyu, I would hope so."

The call goes silent for a few moments. You can hear each other breathing lightly into the phone as you lay in comfortable silence.

"I really miss you," Mingyu says, finally breaking the silence.

"I know, I miss you too." You sigh. "I've been miserable without you. I'm so lonely here, we should've gotten like a cat or something."

Mingyu lets out a breathy chuckle. "Noted. It'll be the first thing I do when I come home next week."

"Ugh," You groan dramatically. "Don't remind me I have to wait a whole week to see you again."

You can practically hear him smiling into the phone. "A week can go by fast, don't worry. I'll be home in no time."

"Good," You smile. "Bed's cold without you here."

"Must be," He yawns.

"Yeah Gyu, I hate it. Need you here now," Your voice is just above a whisper.

"What are you wearing?" He asks.

"You want me to tell you or show you?" You ask.

"Fuck," he whispers. "Show me."

Before he can even finish his thought, his phone is already ringing with an incoming Facetime call. He presses on the green button and sees you adjusting the camera.

Your phone is leaning against something to hold it up and you're sitting crisis cross applesauce on the bed in front of him. "Hi Gyu."

"Hi pretty girl," He smirks.

He rises to his feet, holding his phone in hand as he makes his way over to the desk in his room. He sits down, angling the camera so you can see him.

"Really missed you today," You tell him.

"Missed you too," He licks his lips. "You wearing my shirt?"

You nod. "Yeah. Still smells like you and everything."

You pick up the phone, angling it down so he can see the black and white striped button-up you have on. It fits you big, coming down mid-thigh.

He rasps. "Looks good on you baby."

"It does, doesn't it?" You smirk. "Think it might look better off though, right?"

Suddenly Mingyu isn't sleepy anymore.

"Shit baby, don't do this to me. You know I'm going crazy cuz I can't touch you," He groans, tilting his head back.

"This is the next best thing, no?" You lick your lips, allowing your hand to undo the first button.

"Damn right, it is," He agrees, slipping his hand into his boxers. To no one's surprise, he's already sprouting a semi at the mere thought of having phone sex with you.

It was only a matter of time before this happened anyway. You and Mingyu would rarely go this long without being intimate with one another.

"You didn't seriously call me in nothing but your underwear and expect me not to want you Gyu," You breathe out.

"Didn't do it on purpose sweetheart," He grins.

You've already undone half the buttons of his shirt. He can see your bra peaking through the open material. His cock twitches in anticipation.

He watches like a hawk as you slide the shirt off your shoulders and let it fall off your body entirely. "Shit," he whispers.

You're kneeling in front of the camera in nothing but your bra and underwear. It's a matching lavender set that he bought you a while back.

His eyes are glued to his screen as he watches you. You play with your bra straps, sliding them off your shoulders slowly to expose your breasts to him. He lets out a low groan and feels his cock harden more in his boxers.

He's suddenly feeling suffocated by the material on his hips. He sits up, sliding his underwear off and exposing his leaking cock. He lets out a breath of relief as he wraps his hand around his length.

He swipes his thumb across the tip, using the bit of precum to lubricate his cock. He licks his lips slowly, watching you as you slide your soaked underwear off your body.

"You're so big," you whisper. You're practically drooling at the sight of his cock.

He spits on his hand and starts pumping himself slowly. "Touch yourself f'r me."

You sit back on the bed and slide your hand down between your thighs. He watches as you spread your legs, revealing just how soaked you were for him.

You let out a shaky breath as your finger circles your clit.

"Need you so bad Gyu," You whine.

'i'm here baby-fuck," he groans.

He pumps his length faster, gliding his hand along his hard cock as he watches you touch yourself. He strokes himself, swiping his hand across the sensitive tip every time he pumps himself.

"Inside me.. need you inside me," You whimper. You slip two fingers into yourself slowly. You spread your legs wider to give him a better look. You push your fingers deeper, curling your digits against your inner walls.

"Soon baby, 'm all yours." He breathes out.

"You're so big Gyu, want you to fuck me so bad-ah," You pump your fingers deeper inside of yourself, desperately trying to coax yourself toward an orgasm.

"F-fuck y/n... keep talking," He drops his head back and groans. His muscles are bulging and his grip on his cock is tightening. "Missed your voice."

Even through the low quality of your phone camera, Mingyu was still in awe of you. His eyes were hyperfixated on the way your fingers disappear deep inside of you. His hips jerk up into his fist, warm blood pumping through his veins and making his limbs grow hot with arousal.

You lean back, fingers tightening around his bedsheets clumped in your hand as you push your hips into your hand. "Hah- my fingers are hardly big enough. Need your cock baby–" You whine.

You curl your fingers the same way he does when he touches you, pressing your fingertips against your inner walls. The sensation has your toes curling with a familiar feeling building up inside of you.

His dick twitches in his hand. Fuck, he's so reactive when it comes to you. No one can make him feel the way you do. He lets out a low groan, squeezing the head of his cock to stop himself from cumming when he hears you.

You continue pushing your hips into your hand with erratic movements. You look at your screen, watching your boyfriend strokes his cock. You watch the way his large hand glide along the length of his cock.

"Gyu–fuck, I'm cumming," You warn him.

Mingyu stops holding back the second the words pass your lips. He speeds up his hand, loosening his grip every so slightly. You cum together, bodies shuddering with sloppy movements as you drive yourselves into a state of euphoric pleasure.

He fights to keep his eyes open. They remain half lidded as he refuses to rip his eyes way from the scene before him. He's fixaed on the way your fingers dip into your pussy, coating them with more of your slick arousal as your body spasms and jerks.

He can feel the way his load spills all over his hand and onto his lower abs, but he can't take his eyes off of you. He missed being able to see you fall apart. It's one of his favorite views. Even a thousand miles away, he was still going to see it for himself.

Your chest rises and falls rapidly as you come down. You draw your slick fingers out of your hole slowly, licking your lips as you tap back into all of your senses.

He blinks slowly as he comes down from his high. He grabs a tissue from the desk, cleaning up the mess on his skin. He discards it and slouches against the chair.

"Can't believe we just did that," He lets out a breathy chuckle.

"Thought it would've happened sooner. Been expecting it since your first night away," You smirk.

Mingyu yawns and decides to call it a night. He grabs his phone, plugging it into the charger and pulling his boxers back up onto his waist.

"Sleepy?" You ask.

"Exhausted," He turns off the lights and climbs under the hotel bedsheets. "I feel a lot better though."

"Good," You say.

You mirror his actions, redressing yourself, turning off the lights, and plugging your phone into the charger before climbing under the bedsheets. You're yawning too, snuggling in the sheets with your boyfriend on the phone.

The call goes quiet and it doesn't take long before both of you are fast asleep.

Mingyu can't wait to go back home and sleep next to you properly. For now, FaceTime calls will have to do. But once he can have you in his arms again, his home will feel complete again.

——————————————————————————

© number1mingyustan - Do not repost without permission.

[justagirlwholikesadam]

The American: A Storm is Coming

Remus Lupin x American! Fem! Reader

Summary: Sirius slips out a name that Harry has never heard of before. He wants to get to the bottom of it and wants to know who is this so called, Yankee.

A/n. I want to start off saying, I haven't read the books. I have seen the movies and I'm doing a bit of searching here and there but I'm making stuff up as we go so my plot can work. With that being said, don't come for me. Not sure how many chapters I'll be doing, really depends on the feedback. please read the tags before reading. Enjoy -L

Warning: mention of rape, ANGST, MAJOR ANGST, weapon, reader has it rough, threats being made, mention of killing bad people, new OC, Remus' jealously, Snape is Snape.

WORD COUNT: 18.k

Sirius's voice carried throughout the house as he called your nickname. You let out a groan, opening your eyes. You were met with the white ceiling of the bedroom and you remembered last night's events. You were about to move when you felt Remus’ weight on you. A sleepy smile appears on your face as you bring your hands to his head. His head rested on your chest and you ran your fingers through his messy hair while memories of last night played in your mind. Both of you had run up the stairs to the guest bedroom, Remus casted Silencio on the door as you dash on to the bed. 

Remus slept on top of you, his body heats just felt so good. You shut your eyes again feeling at peace. Sirius screams your name and Remus groans in his sleep. Your name is shouted again and Remus pushes himself up from your body. The half side of his face is red from sleeping on your chest the whole night. Wide awake now, you were worried something was wrong. Remus and you shared a look, Sirius was drunk last night and very sentimental. Both of you shot out of bed. Remus grabs his boxers from the ground while you grab the shirt he had on the night before. You cursed at yourself for leaving your clothes in the living room. You still had to bring your belongings, everything was left in the cottage. Rushing out the door behind Remus. He shouts for Sirius while passing by his room. He gives you a worried look when Sirius’ room is empty and you tell him to go downstairs. Finishing buttoning up the shirt, you almost bump into Remus. He stood still as he looked ahead in the living room. 

“What’s wrong?” You asked, finishing with the last bottom button of the shirt. Looking over Remus’ shoulder you were met with Miles who wore a big bright smile. 

“Howdy there, Mrs. Lupin!” Sirius and Remus look over at you.  

“Miles, what are you doing here?” You asked as you passed Remus who still stared at the cowboy. Remus held the railing of the staircase as you shook Miles’ hand, greeting him. Remus’ clenched his hand hard on the wooden railing when he noticed Miles looking up and down at you. All you had on was a dress shirt, it only covered the upper half of your legs. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes as Miles got closer to you. 

“Don’tcha remember. I'm here to deliver y'all payment.” You let out a sigh and nodded. 

“That’s right. I gave you the address of the cottage but I wasn’t there. Do you have it with you now?” Miles nodded then apparated. Sirius and Remus' gasped in shock. 

“He’s a wizard?!” Sirius asked. You cross your arms over your chest and nod letting out a small yawn. 

“Why were you yelling?” You asked Sirius. 

“We thought something bad happened.” Remus added looking over at his friend who muttered a sorry under his breath. Remus sighs before walking down the stairs to get near you. 

“What is Miles talking about?” He asked you. 

“Remember when I told you I was going to be a week late coming here?” Remus slowly nods. You grab one of his hands with a smile. Before you can say another word, Miles appeared again with 16 wooden crates in the living room. Sirius glances over at the both of you and Miles when he says a little ta daaa and waved his hands at the crates. 

“Now! Mister Carson said ya just let him know when you need more.” You nodded before looking at Remus. 

“Miles, this is my husband, Remus.” Remus saw the shocked expression on the cowboys face. He becomes insecure when he realizes he’s just in his boxers. He tries not to get flustered under Miles' gaze.

“Well butter my butt and call me a biscuit! Golly! How do you do, Remus?” Sirius covers his mouth to not laugh at Miles. The cowboy gets near and goes to shake Remus’ hand. 

Remus shakes his hand and gives him a nod. “I’m doing fine. You?” 

“It’s nice to finally meet the man that our-.” Before Miles can finish, you clapped your hands together and graciously thanked Miles before walking him to the front door. Trying to get him out as soon as possible. 

Shutting the door, you let out a sigh. Walking back Sirius and Remus stood together staring at the crates. 

“Howdy, love!” Sirius tried his best to mimic the southern accent but failed horribly when he started to laugh. 

“That’s amazing. You heard his voice, Moony.” Remus just nods as he crosses his arms over his scarred chest. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know he was coming.” Remus’ face remained still. 

“What job did you do? You didn’t tell me?” You walked towards the crates. 

“Honey, I was going to tell you soon. I just forgot. Before coming back here, there’s a client. He’s a muggle, filthy rich. I’m talking about, probably richer than Sirius. He owns this ranch that serves as a base for some of the aurors in the states. He got into deep trouble for gambling. That idiot didn’t realize that he owed money to a wizard. He wanted me to be his bodyguard for a week. I can show you.” Remus stays quiet while Sirius is over joy with your story. 

“Shit! Bodyguard Yankee!” You just gave Sirius a tight lipped smile. 

“What’s in the crates?” Remus asked. 

Waving your hands in front of the crates, the nails popped out falling onto the ground. The top of the crate opened. Remus and Sirius walk towards it.  Remus frowns when he brushes the hay off and notices a medium sized green glass bottle. 

He lets out a gasp when he reads the label on the bottle. 

“Wolfsbane Potion.” Is noted on a piece of parchment paper and glued onto the bottle with wax. Remus keeps looking further in the crate and he sees another bottle. 

“Bloody hell!” Sirius says when he noticed there are multiple bottles in the crate. Remus stares at you in disbelief.

“There’s enough for years.” You said with a smile at him, happy with the reaction he gave you. “He was really grateful and gave me a lot of money. We can relax now.” You mumbled to Remus knowing how he felt that all the money would be spent on his potions.  You walk towards Remus and he instantly drops the bottles into the crate to hug you, wrapping his arms around your shoulders pulling you into his chest. 

“This is amazing. Thank you.” Remus said, kissing your forehead before looking back at the crates. 

“No need for Snape then.” Sirius commented. Since Remus left Hogwarts, he felt horrible disturbing Severus for it knowing how the dark haired man despised him. You rubbed Remus bare back as he nodded at Sirius. Biting your bottom lip to not saying anything, not wanting to ruin this movement for Remus. 

You wanted to curse at Severus Snape for telling everyone that your husband was a werewolf. Remus had resigned his position, fearing the public wouldn’t be too kind of him being one. You knew it broke his heart leaving, he loved teaching. 

Sirius summoned Kercher and told him to put the crates away while he started on breakfast. One by one, the wooden crates lifted off the ground and floated upstairs to the closet near the guest bedroom. You were welcomed with another one of his bear hugs as you pressed your face against his chest. 

“Thank you. You didn-.” Remus was cut off by your head shaking. “I wanted to.” You told him while pushing his hair out of his face then wrapped your arms around his neck as he wrapped his around your waist pulling you close to him. 

“We can finally do what we wanted to do for years. Use the money we have saved up for the cottage. Use it to visit the world. Buy all the chocolate you want.” Remus laughs at the last part. 

“The job wasn't hard though, right?” Remus asked with a concerning tone. 

You shook your head. “No, it was probably the most easy job I had in years. He’s in this lovely ranch. The sunrise and sunset are so beautiful. I wish you could see it for yourself.” 

The three of you enjoyed breakfast afterwards as you both talked more about Miles. Sirius demanded for a cowboy hat and stated Remus would be a wonderful cowboy. 

Days turned into weeks and Sirius was fixing the house little by little. Remus and you would help him clean out the rooms after bringing your belongings from the cottage. Cleaning around the house and fucking Remus became a daily thing. You felt much closer to him than before. The time that was wasted on working and being away from him was made up. Sirius was so overjoyed seeing both of you in domestic bliss. Remus would be reading in the library and while you sat on the ground cleaning your guns. You showed Sirius how to hold and fire a weapon after he begged Remus to convince you. Some nights ended with you telling Sirius what he missed. You told him some of the missions you had done in the states. Some night ended with you crying telling him about the death of your fellow friends. Some nights Sirius cried about telling you and Remus about Azkaban. 

You held Remus when he confessed to both of you that he was so heartbroken when he left his teaching position in Hogwarts. 

“I didn’t think I would be good at first.” Remus said softly. “But seeing those kids and Harry. I knew my place was teaching but as always I ran away. I knew the parents would hate me when they found out the truth. I don’t think I would be able to handle it if the children hated me too.” 

You received letters from Harry every week. Remus and you would read them in bed holding each other. Remus was in tears when Harry wrote that he missed Remus in school. Telling you that no one had come close to Remus. Everyone asked about Professor Lupin and how they missed the music he would play while they worked. The younger children play the muggle games that were taught to them by him and the older children wanted to know more about muggle music. While their parents weren’t too fond when finding out he was a werewolf the students didn’t mind. 

Moody and Dumbledore announced that a meeting was due. Remus and you stood in the back as the members of Order of the Phoenix came walking in. Everyone greeted both of you and Sirius' shoulders tensed up when he saw Tonks walking into the kitchen. She had left soon after your arrival, to be exact, she left the moment she saw Remus and you kissing. 

“Hey, Remus.” You were speaking with Moody when you saw a young woman with pink hair walking towards the back. 

“Hello Tonks.” Remus greeted her, you felt his hand on your back and he looked down at you. 

“Dear, this is Tonks. Sirius’ cousin.” You smiled at her and greeted her wondering why didn’t Sirius say anything about having a family member so close by. You reached your hand out for her to shake it but she just looked at you then at Remus. 

“Tonks, this is my wife.” Remus introduced her to you. You dropped your hand and cleared your throat when she didn’t shake it. Stealing a quick glance at your husband, you can see how uncomfortable he was. 

“Remus never mentioned to me about you before.” Tonks said, looking at you with a raised brow. 

“I told you, Tonks. It was for Remus’ and her safety. Only close friends knew.” Sirius said standing behind her. Remus gave Sirius a ‘thank you’ look over Tonk’s shoulder. Shacklebolt had told Remus and Sirius that Tonks was a bit upset when she found out that Remus was married. Molly had even gotten far to apologize to Tonks, telling her she didn't know either. The Weasley mother was a bit embarrassed since she was the one to insinuate that Tonks should get with Remus. Hyping Tonks up that they would be good together. 

“It was nice meeting you.” You tell her while grabbing Remus’ arm and tugging him to sit down on the empty seats near Shacklebolt. Tonks leaves after that and sit away from you. You glance over at Remus and he offers you a smile. 

You weren't new to the looks that you got from Tonks. You were stared at the moment you came to Hogwarts. You have been looked at and ridiculed. Judged for anything you did and when Remus and you became a thing, the looks never did stop. You knew Tonks fancied Remus. You had to be a blind person to not see it and you didn't hate her for it. Remus was an attractive man. He had the eyes of an angel, he had a smile that could make a room light up. He was compassionate and understanding. You couldn’t help but feel a bit jealous. Tonks was much younger and she probably spent more time with Remus. As the meeting continued, Remus held your hand under the table. Dumbledore welcomed you into the group and introduced you to a few members you didn't know like Bill Weasley. Dumbledore was in the middle of a sentence when the floo was heard in the living room. 

“Must be Severus.” He said waiting for him to walk into the kitchen. You gave Sirius a small smile when he made eye contact with you. You haven't seen Severus in years. Taking a deep breath, you knew this would be interesting. You had a bone to pick with him but you knew you had to play nice. Severus being a double agent is risky, he was doing a dangerous job and you respected him a bit even after how he acted in school.

 “Dumbledore.” Severus greeted as he walked into the kitchen and gave a nod to everyone. His dark eyes glided over you and a noticeable frown appeared on his pale face. 

“Well. Well. If it isn’t Mrs. Lupin, in the flesh.” Severus said to you as he got closer to the table. 

“Yeah, it’s me. Don’t cream your pants, Snape.” You told him and his eyes looked over at Remus before looking at Dumbledore. 

“Are you positive you want someone like her in the group?” Severus asked, glaring back at you. 

“She is welcomed to this group-.” Remus was cut off by Severus. 

“Do you know what she is honestly capable of, Loony Lupin?” You rose up from your seat and Sirius joined you as well. Fuck, playing nice. You stared hard at Severus wanting to punch him right in the face and break that beak he calls a nose. Remus tried to get you to sit back down but you walked behind him and stared at Severus. 

“Watch your mouth, Snivellus.” Sirius warned Severus, eyeing him up and down.

“Doesn't your dog have a muzzle?” Severus sneered at you harshly after giving Sirius a glare.

“For someone who knows what I am capable of, you run your mouth a lot. Do tell, what do you know about me?” Dumbledore was about to speak when Severus spoke first as you walked closer to him. 

“You are called The American. Others say you’re the daughter of the devil. You have many enemies, Y/n. Many fear you while others can't wait to have their revenge on you. Even who shall not be named knows of you, he doesn't admit it loudly but he knows you are a problem especially after your little display a year ago.” 

Sirius knitted his brows together when Severus mentioned the name, The American. The prisoners of Azkaban whispered and spatted that name in disgust. Some of them were placed there because of you, he heard the stories through the bars of his cell. He thought they weren't real, simply just stories to pass the time especially when he heard that the prisoners had see you, The American two places at once. 

“Tell me, how is your friend, Mulciber doing?” You asked, crossing your arms over your chest. The tension in the room was high as everyone stared at Severus and you. Remus bites his tongue when he feels your magic stirring inside of you. Both of you can feel each other, it was something that came when being bonded with a werewolf. He feels you were about to lash out again. Remus wanted this to end, no fighting between any one.

Remus thought to himself, he was an idiot for believing they can have one meeting without fighting but Severus brings your anger out and see how far you can go especially when bringing him into the mix. Remus clenched his hands on his knees when Severus blurted out that nickname, it given to him in school. Remus glance over at you and he swore he saw you back in school with your fist bloodily, you had just hit someone who called him that. He looks over at Severus and his heart starts to pound out of his chest. The urge to fight was stirring deep inside his belly.

“You castrated him. Took his balls and dick, how do you think he's doing?” Severus said. Sirius looks over at Remus with a shocked expression. Remus still had his eyes at Severus. Sirius saw a glitter of anger in Remus’ eyes when Severus stepped closer to you.

For brief second, you remembered being this close to Severus years ago. He was seething at you, calling you a filthy mud blood who had no place in Hogwarts. 

"Y/n." You hear Remus in your head. His voice is deep and hard, in the corner of your eye you saw Remus staring at you.

"Please. Sit down." Remus pleads inside your mind.

“Doing well, then.” You answer Severus and walk back to Remus, who quickly grabbed your hand pulling you down to sit. 

“What did he did for you to do that?” Bill asked softly, looking between Severus and you. 

Remus looks over at Bill, “He came over the states with a group. Raping woman and men. Mulciber's last victim was a daughter of two aurors, Yankee knew them well.” 

Bill looked away with that information, most of them did. “Do you support her actions, killing them? Using such a barbaric method?” Severus asked Remus. 

Remus feels a laugh brewing in his chest but swallows it down.

“Absolutely." Remus stares hard at Severus as he answers.

"I was the one holding Mulciber down. He and the rest got what they deserved.” Remus said, still remembering the screams of the girl's parents when they found out their daughter didn't survive the attack. Remus said it so nonchalantly that it made Severus and the rest freeze. The quiet and polite, Remus changed for a brief second. Sirius couldn't recognize his dear friend as he slowly sat back down in his seat. 

“Is there even a spell for that?” Moody asked and Remus shook his head. 

“The things you can do with just a blade and a flame torch are endless.” You answered Moody glancing over at Severus who wore a scowl.

“Well, then.” Moody broke the silence before looking over at Dumbledore. Severus sat down and waited for Dumbledore to continue on with the meeting. The meeting ended with the need of two people for a mission. 

“The full moon is coming up, baby.” You mentioned to Remus who was thinking of volunteering. 

“I’ll go.” Sirius said and you made a face. “I should go. You can stay with Remus and help him plus they are still looking for you.”

Remus shook his head. “You just came back from working. It’s only been a few months.” 

“I know but none of you have been going on missions lately. I'm sorry, but you guys are probably rusty.” You said looking around knowing it was true. The Order of the Phoenix just started up again because of the news of the arrival of who shall not be named. 

“I just came from a mission. Not like the ones you have gone but I can be of some assistance to you.” Bill spoke out ignoring the worried look from his parents. 

“What do you do for work?” You asked him. 

“A curse-breaker for Gringotts Wizarding Bank.” Bill answered and you can sense the anger coming from Remus. He wanted you to relax and rest while coming back here for good. You loved the idea of Remus wanting you to relax but you couldn't not when there's a war coming.

“Have you killed anyone?” You asked him and Molly stood up from her seat. 

“He’s just a boy. This is a mission to look for recruiters not to fight.” Molly told you. 

“I know that but God forbid something comes up and we get attacked. How will your son defend himself?” You asked her. 

“This isn’t how we do things.” Molly added, she was scared from what she learned today from Severus. Many have looked at you with fear and thought you were heartless but you didn't care.

“Remus told me you guys cast a spell to just disarm them and such. What do you do when you are faced with someone who wants to kill you?” You asked around, looking at each of them. 

“You kill them before they kill you.” Moody answered and you nodded. 

“This won’t be like the first war. Times have changed, technology has advanced and even though it’s a muggle thing. Death Eaters from the States have used it to their advantage since who shall not be named was gone but now he has returned. I’m sure, they will be arriving as well and showing him these new weapons." You look around the table and you can see everyone faces were scared or shocked. Even the Headmaster looked a bit uneasy.

"Death Eaters from the states are more ruthless than the ones here. They won’t be casting just freezing spells. They will kill you and the most deranged of them will take their time doing it.” You told them.

“They don’t know you are here yet.” Severus said, looking over at you. Severus spoke how the Dark Lord, didn't know The American was back. Bellatrix didn't recognized you when you deflected her spell.

“Good, we will use that to our advantage.” Dumbledore added with a nod.

“The moment they find out The American is back. He would likely ask for all his followers to come and they will be after you.” Severus said making you feel uneasy not because they would be after you but the number of Voldemort's following. Looking around the table, there was not enough people.

“What about us? How many do we have on our side?” You asked them. 

“Not enough.” Moody replied. 

“We will get more people. Going on this mission will allow us that. You and Bill will be entering a small community of werewolves. Talk to them, tell them about this war. Persuade them to join us.” Dumbledore said, looking between you and Bill. Severus chuckles and you look over at him. 

“Something to say?” You asked him. Severus looks back at you. 

“Fucking say it.” You snapped at him when he was taking his sweet ass time to respond. 

You never were close with Severus. Not even when both of you were in school, he despised you and every opportunity he had he reminded you that you were nothing but a mudblood. No matter what you did. You had even tried to form a friendship with him, it ended badly. To this day you still didn’t know why he hated you so much. Part of you thought it was because you were with Remus, he was friends with the people that bullied him. Another part of you thought was because of your magic but Severus was powerful as well. 

“I have a hard time believing that you can just go somewhere and talk. You can’t go inside the community waving your gun around acting like the savage animal you are.” Severus said and you felt the table move so quickly that it made you flinch. There was a screeching sound as the table moved. In a flash, Remus apparated in front of Severus, standing face to face with him. Remus was breathing heavily as he stared at Severus. 

“Like husband and wife.” Severus said to Remus. You call out for your husband. 

“Severus, enough. Remus.” Dumbledore shouted but it was ignored.

“You say whatever you want about me.” Remus’ voice is strain as his shoulders rose up and down in anger. 

“But you will respect my wife, never speak ill about her or it will be the last time you have a tongue.” You walked towards Remus as he threated Severus. Shacklebolt was beside Moody standing up as well. Shacklebolt had his wand in hand incase of something.

“You should watch who you are speaking to. I am the one that prepares your potions for your furry problems.” Severus said tauntingly to him. 

“Your services are no longer needed.” Remus tells him as he feels your hand on his lower back. Sirius got up, following you when Remus’ jaw clenched. The full moon was approaching, the first staging was now showing. His temper was unwinding. 

Severus flinched when Remus lets out a growl, deep from his chest. It’s been years since Severus heard that very growl. He heard that growl when Sirius pranked him that night. He took a step back when he imagined Moony standing in front of him on his hind legs, and mouth open showing its sharp fangs. 

“You dare to gro-.” Severus was about explode.

“That is enough. This meeting is over.” Dumbledore shouts, cutting the tension between Severus and Remus. Dumbledore casted a look at you then at Bill. 

“Your mission will start in three weeks. It will give them enough time to recover from the full moon. That’s it everyone.” Molly and Arthur along with Bill rose up to say their goodbyes. 

Dumbledore waited for Severus to walk out first. Severus glares at you before walking out of the kitchen. Tonks follows him without a word.

“Lupin, sit down. Let’s have a drink.” Moody said, stomping his cane on the ground. Shacklebolt joins in as Sirius and he fixes the table.

“We should be going.” Arthur tells you and Bill walks towards you as Sirius grabs Remus by the arm to make him sit down with the rest of them. Remus doesn’t say a word, his jaw is still clenched. Eyes still hardened. 

“I will keep in touch with you.” You nod at Bill, shaking his hand. 

Arthur says your name after muttering something to Bill. Molly looks worried for a second but Bill places a hand over her shoulder to ease her worries and walks out with her. 

“Snape was wrong for saying that.” He said as Sirius came into the kitchen with a bottle of fire whiskey.

“You’re probably the best we have. Moody is good but I heard stories about you. The Ministry of Magic speaks highly of you. Do not let his words affect you.” You give him a smile before looking at Remus who was staring at you and Arthur over Moody’s shoulders. 

“Believe me, he’s the last person I will let bother me.” You said making him chuckle. 

“Do forgive Molly. She’s just worried for the kids and Harry. We think of him as a part of our family. He’s been through so much. She wants him to be a child as much as he can.” His voice held so much emotion that you looked away to control your own tears. You were glad Harry had the Wesley family. You shook his hand goodbye and you glanced over at Sirius and Remus when Arthur walked out. 

“You've been married for more than 12 years and you didn’t say a word.” Shacklebolt said before giving Remus a nod of a good job done before glancing back at you. His eyes looking up and down at you. 

“Did you just check out my wife?” Remus asked with a deadpan look. Moody and Sirius laugh at Shacklebolt’s worried face. 

“Don’t hog the fire whiskey.” You tell them, interrupting Shacklebolt who was stuttering an apology to Remus. Moody grabs an empty glass and pours a hearty amount for you. 

“Telling me more about these Death Eaters from the states.” Moody tells you after the second shot. Shacklebolt was also curious, so you did. They were shocked by how brutal they were. Remus remains quiet for the time they spend drinking. He stared at the glasses then at you. You had your hand on his thigh rubbing it up and down to get him to relax. 

At the end of drinking Moody and Shacklebolt welcomed you into the group. They bid goodbye to everyone and gave thanks to Sirius for the drinks. You retire to bed, wishing Sirius a goodnight. He hugged you before you left the kitchen. You touched Remus’ shoulder, passing him. You can hear Sirius and Remus whispering to themselves as you walk upstairs to the bedroom. 

Walking in, you let out a sigh. The room looked more like the bedroom in the cottage. It felt home, you missed it but you were happy being here with Sirius. You were unbuttoning your shirt when you heard Remus enter the bedroom. He shuts the door softly, looking ahead at the mirror of the dresser you saw him walking behind you. Remus sighs and leans against you. He bends down to rest his chin on your shoulder as his arms wrapped around your torso. Enjoying each other's presence in comfortable silence. 

“Severus. He’s a bitter man.” Remus said after a few moments. You agree with him, that’s Severus all right. 

“Tell me something, I don’t know. He’s always been like that. He’s been like that since the first time I met him.” You said recalling the first time you met him. You wouldn’t forget how cold his stare was.

“He’s upset because of Mulciber. They were close in school. I’m sure they were lovers and imagine finding out someone you love is a fucking rapist.” You said and Remus steps back. 

“Are you trying to defend his attitude he had today?” You shake your head at Remus. 

“No, like you said he’s just bitter. Especially after what I did, I might have some sort of reason why he’s acting more of an ass then he usually is.” You answered Remus turning around to face him.

“I’m sorry he called you that name.” You said grabbing Remus’ hand pulling him towards the bed. You sat beside him.

“Don’t be. I don’t care what people say about me. I have been called so many names in my youth. I only care what he said about you. I wanted to hurt him for saying that to you today. You are not a savage animal.” Remus said, pulling your hand on his lap. 

“You looked so hot, baby.” You mumble to him with a smile and Remus chuckles as he looks over at you. 

“Did I?” You nod at him. “You always look hot but mad Remus is just-.” 

Remus cuts you off with his lips. He pushes you down, laying on your back. You kiss him back, wrapping your arm around his neck. He pulls away and looks down at you, his hand creasing your cheek. 

“You think I’m hot when I’m mad but you should see yourself when you are. The small amount of time I see you in action.” Remus shakes his head as his scarred cheeks blushes at the thought. 

“I never want you to see me like that.” You whispered. 

“You have only seen a glimpse of The American. I don’t want you to see me like that. Never. I become something else. Somethi-.” he shakes his head cutting you off.

“If I ever see it, I would be proud of you. Such a powerful and strong woman you are, my wife. You’re the strongest person I know, Yank.” He tells you softly. You pull him down for a hug, shutting your eyes tightly. You knew he meant it but he has only seen a glimpse of it. He has only witnessed a fraction of the horror you can cause. The Death Eaters were right to call you the daughter of the devil. Your father was evil and you had his temper. You used that temper in the field and those who got in your way, never survived.

Remus helped you sit up and kissed your cheek before getting up to change his clothes. You were changing your pants when you looked over your shoulders at Remus, he was removing his shoes. Getting into your sleeping clothes, you remember the way Tonks looked at him. You weren’t mad like you said before Remus was an attractive guy and there would be people who would want him. You trusted Remus, he never once gave you any reason that he was a cheater or even made you believe something may happen but like any human being with feelings. There was that little nagging voice in your head telling you maybe Remus did like her. 

Tonks is young and beautiful. She’s not scarred like you or had a difficult job that made her leave her husband alone for weeks. Maybe she got mad because she and Remus had an affair and he said it was over because you returned. 

Rubbing your face with your hands, you calmed yourself. Taking deep breaths, you felt like a schoolgirl being nervous to ask her boyfriend a simple question. This is your husband. The man you love. You can ask Remus anything you want just as he can with you.

“So, what’s up with Tonks?” You asked Remus as you sat on the bed.

Remus looks over your shoulders at you. 

“What about her?” He asks and you shrug your shoulders at him. Remus turns around to face you when you wouldn't look at him in the face. 

When you don't respond, he speaks. “She’s just Sirius’ cousin. Molly tried to set her up with me but I kept refusing. Told her I’m old and I’m going to hurt her. Fucking kid, didn’t get the message that I don’t like her. She got pissed when she saw us kissing and at the news that we were married. Sirius told me that he had told her that it was for our safety that we didn't tell anyone.” 

“She’s young and beautiful.” Your voice was low and Remus got closer to you. 

“She works here, you know. I..wel..-.” You sighed when you weren't able to finish.

“What’s going on?” Remus asked and stated your name loudly when you’d started to get too much into your head. 

“I was just going to say. I wouldn’t be angry if you cheated on me with her. A part of me will get why you did. I’m barely here, I leave you alone all day, sometimes for weeks and months. You must get so lonely and she’s there. She’s pretty and young. Not me who’s fucking damaged.” Remus stands up from his side of the bed and walks towards you. You’re about to speak again and he hushes you to be quiet. 

Sitting on the bed, he grabs your hands looking at you. 

“Never. I never once thought or had cheated on you. Y/n. I love you so much to even cheat on you. I get lonely sometimes, yes but I read, I do gardening, I keep myself entertained by learning new stuff that I can do around the cottage so when you come home everything will be fine and fixed. Learned how to cook during those times, I kept myself busy with things but never with the company of a women.” He cups your face and makes you look at him. 

“You are not damaged. You are strong. You are beautiful. You are my wife. You are everything to me.” Remus kisses you passionately, he kisses away those thoughts you had in your head. You pull away from his lips as you cup his face, rubbing his cheeks. 

“You know I would never do that to you, right?”  Remus is quiet but nods at you. 

“I’m so happy I’m back. I was tired of not being able to hold you, kiss you and feel you. Remus Lupin, you are everything to me as well. Everything I do is for you, everything I have is yours. Every mission I did, I prayed to whoever was listening to me to help me survive and get back to you.” You jumped onto his lap and hugged him. Remus holds you, rubbing your back gently. 

Remus and you laid together in bed that night. Embracing each other and basking in each other's warmth.

The moon was going down and you had stayed up all night for it. You couldn’t sleep without him. Not now since you've been back. You missed Remus too much to sleep. Sitting on the bed, the house was quiet and dark. You rose up from the bed and grabbed your robe hanging on the post of the bed. Looking at the small digital clock on your night stand it was almost time. 

Remus was going to transform back. Stepping out of the room, tying the robe tightly around you. Your bare foot padded down the hallway, passing Sirius’ room downstairs then to the basement. The locks on the steel door unlocked itself and you heard a whine. 

In the dark room, you can hear Remus’ crying out as his bones cracked back into his human self. A growl came out of the dark and you stood by the door. Your eyes glisten with unshed tears. It hurt you that you couldn’t do much when he transformed back. You couldn’t ease his pain that very moment. All you can do is wait for it to be over, wait for Moony to leave and for your Remus to come back.

You heard a soft groan and you immediately walked inside, waving your hand in front of you. One by one the candles you set up around the room lit up. Bright light was too harsh for Remus after transforming, candles were much better.

You stared ahead at the large cage Sirius had set up, it took the entire room, enough room for Remus to walk around in his wolf form. A large mattress, that’s been charmed to not rip was laid out on the floor by the corner. Variety of blankets and pillows were on the mattress. Frowning, you didn’t see Remus on it. Walking further in you got closer to the cage and froze when you heard a soft growl coming from the corner of the cage. 

The soft light of the candles glowed around Remus. He was sitting on a small metal chair attached to the cage. His legs were spread open, his soft cock hung between his legs. His chest rose up and down with each breath he took. His hands rested on top of his knees, palms facing up. His hair was a mess and his eyes peeked behind the strands of hair. 

Another growl came from his mouth as his eyes stared at you. His eyes were golden, his iris were shining, glowing brighter than the candles around him. You haven’t seen Moony in so long. It’s been a while, last time you met him was - you let out a small gasp when the bite mark on your neck started to sting. He was calling you.

You unlocked the cage and untied the robe. A smirk appeared on Remus’ tired face when he saw the robe fall down, pooling around your feet. You wore a thin tank top and a pair of black underwear. The cool air made you shiver and your nipples grew hard. 

“Hey baby.” You said kneeling down by the entrance of the cage. You kept your head down as you began to crawl inside. You crawled towards him, Moony has told you himself that he liked it whenever you did it. He gives out a groan when you stop in front of him. You’re between his legs, your forehead touching his soft cock. You wince when you laid your hand on the concrete floor, your knees were getting a bit sore. 

You felt a heavy hand on the back of your head, his fingers grasping on your hair. You let out a yelp when he tugged it hard making you look up at him. 

Your cunt quivered by his action. He was making you look up at him. His golden eyes seemed to glowed down. Dawn was approaching, Remus was coming back. 

“Baby.” You whispered and Remus leans down, his hand still holding your hair. He bumped his nose with yours, he sniffed at you. You shut your eyes when he dragged his nose across your cheek down to your neck. He tugged harder on your hair and made you moan. 

“I remembered the first time I smelled you.” Your cheeks grew pink by his confession. 

“On the train. Your blood. It smelled so good.” Opening your eyes when you felt his hand under your chin, he was staring down at you. 

“I knew you were mine.” He whispered with a small groan. 

“Mine. Mine. All mine. Mine. Mine.”  His deep voice turns soft and his golden eyes turn into the shade of blue. 

“I’m so glad you’re here.” Remus whispered, making you smile. 

You helped him up when he started to go in and out of consciousness, something that happened very often. It has taken a toll on his body, you were happy that you didn’t see any serious injury. The potion did its job. You quickly got to work, not wanting to leave him down in the basement for a second longer. 

Remus watches you with heavy eyes when you help into the tub. He moans when his body hits the warm water. He feels a soft rag against his body, looking up. He sees you, staring at his chest as you rub the wash cloth against his skin. 

“Rest.” You whispered not wanting to agitate his headache. 

He falls asleep in the tub and you use magic to lift him up and place him on to the bed. Sirius quietly walks into the room and hands you a few vials for Remus to drink when he wakes up. Something for the body aches, something for the headache, something for his stomach and something for his joints. He comes back into the room with a thick blanket for Remus, charming it to be warm. Sirius felt like he was back in Hogwarts, taking care of Remus. Sirius waits for you as you dry Remus’ legs. You didn’t bother getting him dressed but you did apply lotion on his hands and feet. After rubbing lotion on his legs, you bring the thick blanket up to his chest. Pushing the hair out of his handsome face. 

Standing up from the bed, you laid out his robe in the chair next to him. You follow Sirius out of the door and leave it open incase he calls for you. Sirius cooked breakfast and both of you talked while Kercher cleaned around the house. Ignoring the little elf glaring at you. The day was quick after spending it with Sirius. He was still renovating the rooms. He decides to show Harry’s room.

You looked around the room and deemed it to be a great room for Harry. You try to push out the small cupboard room out of your head.  Harry asked you to not tell Sirius, you were going to keep your word. 

“I’m going to put a bed over there and a desk for him on the side. Maybe some shelves for his books.” Sirius said pointing at the empty corner and you smile at the look of seriousness on his face. 

“What color do you think he likes? God! I’m his godfather and I don’t know. Maybe he won’t like the room..blimey what if he regrets coming to stay with me if the color of the room isn’t to his liking?” You chuckle at Sirius as he walks around the room. 

“Si! Si! Stop!” You said grabbing your friend’s arm when he began to pace back and forth in the room. 

“I promise you, Harry would love it no matter what color it is.” You tell him. You meant it, Harry would like any room that had space and no bars on the window.

“I want it to be amazing for him.” Sirius said softly looking over at you with a smile. 

“I know and it will be.” You said squeezing his arm gently.

“We should definitely get some Quidditch posters and hang them around the wall.” You comment and Sirius smiles as he agrees with you. 

“Did you clean out all the other rooms?” You asked Sirius and he shakes his head. 

“Not yet, there’s two more bedrooms upstairs.” He says. 

“I’ll help out.” You told him while walking out of the room. Walking down the hallway to see the staircase. A chill ran through you when you began to walk up the stairs. 

You see a large wooden black door with the words Master Bedroom on it. Passing by it to get started on the last room at the end of the hall. You froze when you saw Regulus Black written on the door. 

“Reg.” You whispered as you stood in front of the door. 

You haven’t thought of him in years. With a shaky hand you grabbed the golden knob of the door and twisted it. The air was dusty and you grabbed your wand from your pocket and waved it in the room. The dust in the room disappeared as you walked inside. It was the size of the guest bedroom, with two large windows by the neatly made bed. Everything was green, the comforter of the bed, the color of the walls and curtains. You stared at the posters of astronomy on the walls. Walking to the bed, you sat down on the edge staring at the shelves of books that covered the entire wall. He was always reading, always had his nose in a book when he wasn’t playing Quidditch. 

Regulus Black was the first person to treat you with kindness in Hogwarts. You didn’t know why he stood up from his seat the first day you came into school and sat across from you. He was younger than you, he was tall for his age, a bit lanky. His hair was dark like the night, it came down in curls. He had a thin nose and a plushy pinky lips. You remember looking up at him when he introduced himself to you. You thought he was a model at first.

He looked like the models in the magazine. He had defined cheekbones, dark lashes that complimented his eyes. He ate dinner with you. He looked at you with interest. You had no idea who he was but he had to be popular because everyone stared at you when he sat down across from you. You thought he was weird at first when he didn’t know who Santa’s elves were.

Looking at the night stand, you opened the drawers. Parchment paper and quills were inside the first drawer. You were always jealous of his penmanship, you smiled as you traced a word, curving the delicate loops on the paper. You would spend hours trying to learn how to write with a quill. You would cried out in frustration in the library most days when you couldn’t write properly. You wish that they would just use regular pen and pencils but you remember you were in the wizardly world now. Your Charms professor made that clear to you when he called you out in front of the entire class.

Opening the second drawer, you froze when you saw an album. Grabbing it and flipping through it, you saw pictures of young Sirius with Regulus. Regulus had told you his side of the story of why he wasn’t talking with Sirius. Regulus had confined in you multiple times about how he missed his older brother. He missed Sirius’ hugs and missed their talks. At that time you didn’t know anything about the rivalry against the houses. You didn’t know what pure blood, muggle born and half blood were. He was your friend, your best friend during your first year of Hogwarts. That was until he changed completely and vanished. You stopped at the solo picture of Regulus.  He looked to the right then back at ahead, facing the camera smiling wide at the shot. He had his Slytherin uniform on in the picture. You missed him dearly, you wanted to tell him everything that happened to you. You wanted to tell him how you married Remus and your job in the states. You long for those hours of talks both of you had. Bringing your left hand to the picture, you traced the line of his face. You stopped when you saw your golden band on your finger. 

Remus and Regulus never met eye to eye. Sirius told you after Regulus went missing. He told you one night that Remus was jealous of his younger brother. Jealous that Regulus had a close connection with you. You just shook your head at Sirius. Not really believing it. Regulus was the first person that you mentioned about your life at home. He held you as you cried everyday you were bullied, talked to you into staying in Hogwarts. You met Remus when both of you were at the lowest point in life. You wouldn’t forget how you met him. Remus looked so beautiful as he cried. That’s how you met him, he was crying. You had seen him before in class and in the great hall. This was the first time you met him up close. You met his gaze and you felt your heart stop.  

You were surprised when he said your name, he knew who you were. Most of the students knew you as the mudblood in house Slytherin. 

You hear Sirius call out for you, quickly shutting it close. You made your way out of the room and shut the door behind you. Walking to your bedroom and carefully walking inside to not make sound. Remus is still sleeping, placing the photo album inside of your nightstand drawer. You wanted to reminisce about all the good times you had with your best friend, Regulus. He made your time in Hogwarts a bit better in the beginning. You always wondered where he went. 

You wished he had told you where he had gone. You refused to believe Sirius when he told you Regulus was a Death Eater, you didn’t want to believe him. He guessed that Regulus ran away and was hiding. 

You glance back at Remus and smile when you see how peaceful he looked. You walked out of the room and headed downstairs. Your eyes widened when you saw Harry staring in the middle of the living room with Sirius. 

“Hello, my sweet boy.” You said walking to Harry. He greets you with a hug and you kiss his forehead. Sirius smiles at the sight of Harry and you. 

“Is everything alright with you? You didn’t send a letter saying you were coming?” You asked, looking at Harry, cupping his face with a worried look. 

“I was telling Sirius. I wanted to check and see if Remus was doing okay since last night was the full moon.” Sirius and you smiled at Harry’ concern for Remus. 

“He’s doing fine, dear. Sleeping it off, he might sleep all day.” You told Harry. Sirius invites Harry for lunch. 

The three of you were eating when Harry looked over at Sirius. You glanced at Sirius, when Harry asked to speak with him about something. 

“I was wondering if I can stay this summer with you guys.” Harry asked Sirius. 

“Of course!” Sirius yelps with a gleeful laugh and stands up from his seat. 

“Your room will be finished by the time school ends. “ Harry’ brows raise up in surprise. 

“My room? I can stay on the couch.” Sirius shakes his head at Harry. Your chest tightens at his words. 

“You will have your own room. With your own bed and you will have your desk. Somewhere to put your books and clothes. It will be ready for you.” Harry's eyes glisten behind his rounded glasses as Sirius spoke. 

“You are still under age, have you spoken to your aunt and uncle about it?” He asks Harry. You immediately look at Harry to see his reaction. You hoped Petunia kept her word. You were ready to handle that fuck fat, she calls her husband, Vernon. 

“Surprisingly, they said yes to me staying somewhere else this coming summer.” You smile at his response. 

That fat fuck will live to see a another day. 

You frowned when you noticed a scar on Harry’s hand. You kept your eye on it. ‘I must not tell lies’ Your jaw clenched as you stared at it. It was a blood quill spell, you wanted to ask Harry about it but you didn’t want to interrupt him and Sirius talking. Harry looked so happy as Sirius asked him about the color he would want his room to be. 

Harry spent more time with Sirius while you tried to wake Remus up for dinner time. You wanted him to eat something, he had to eat something while he took his potions. 

Remus woke up feeling better than usual. He thanked you for bathing him. The warm bath helped his sore muscles. You were feeding him chicken soup, it was always best for something light to not upset his stomach. Remus told you he was able to feed himself but you didn’t allow him. 

You happily took care of him. He licked his lips, savoring the soup as you spoon fed him. He drank the potion and he felt better as the minutes passed. 

“Harry is downstairs. He came to see how his uncle Remus was doing.” You said softly not wanting to agitated him if he had a headache. 

Remus gives you a small smile. “You think he’s still downstairs?” 

“Yeah, Sirius wants to know everything Harry wants for his bedroom.” Remus wipes his lips with a napkin. 

“Good, I’m glad. He deserves it. He deserves a home, a room.” You agree with him. You told Remus, the little visit at the Dursleys worked. They were allowing Harry to stay over the upcoming summer. You helped Remus get dressed before Harry came upstairs to see him. Remus greets Harry with a smile. 

You were sitting with Remus leaning against the headboard while Harry sat by Remus’ legs. Sirius came up with tea and sat by your legs. Harry spoke to you three about classes and his friends. Sirius teased him by asking Harry if there was anyone he fancied. 

The three weeks were coming to an end and you have been communicating with Bill about the mission. You weren't worried about it, it was a simple mission. Speaking with the community to gain their support for the war.    Four hours tops, that was the limit. Even though the mission will be light work. You told Bill that there were certain protocols that you wanted to get by. Even the easiest mission still needed some rules. You missed the looks Bill gave you when you told him the rules before arriving at the site of the community. 

It was the night before the mission and you had spoken to Bill to meet you at Sirius’ place in the morning. You were walking upstairs to the bedroom when you saw Remus on your side of the bed. 

“Hey.” You said walking inside the room. Remus didn’t say anything. He kept looking down at the photo album on his lap. 

“Are you okay?” You said then froze when Remus still didn't answer you. 

“Why do you have his pictures?” Remus asked, looking at a picture of Regulus in disgust. He looked up and you were shocked by his expression. 

“I was cleaning up his room when I found it. He was my best friend, Rem. I wanted a picture.” You answered him. 

“This isn’t just a picture. It’s a photo album.” Remus said. 

“What’s wrong?” You asked him. 

“I do not want you having his pictures.” You frowned at his response. 

“Remus, I want to remember him. Like I said, he was my best friend.” Remus shakes his head. 

“He left you, remember.” Remus’ jealousy betrays him completely that he didn’t realize that he had shouted at you. 

“He disappeared.” You corrected him. You had to correct it because Regulus couldn’t have just left you without saying a word. 

“He left.” Remus snaps and you take a step back when Remus shuts the photo album harshly. He throws it on the bed and stands up to face you. 

“Remus, what’s going on?” You ask him not fully understanding what was going on in his head.

 “You have photos of him. Why?” You answered him back immediately, repeating what you told him before. 

“You wanted photos of the boy you were with?” You frowned at his words.

“He was a friend, Remus. Nothing more, you know that. I have only been with you.” Remus shakes his head at you. 

“You were the only boyfriend I had. Regulus and I were close friends. He knew that and I knew that.” You couldn’t comprehend why Remus was acting this way all of the sudden. 

“Oh please.” He said sarcastically and it makes you feel ill. 

“You're still telling me that same lie. This just proves that you had something with him before us. You still have feelings for him probably.” You waved your hand at Remus trying to get him to calm down. 

“What are you even talking about? Baby, do you hear yourself? Regulus and I have never been together. You were my first. You were and still is the only man I will ever love. Why are you acting this way?” You walk in front of him. 

“Please, don’t lie to me again. It will just get me more angry.” Remus warns. 

“I’m not lying.” You admit and he walks out of the room. You follow him, calling his name out. Sirius walks into the living when he hears you shouting. 

“What’s going on?” Sirius asks Remus who passed him without a glance. Sirius frowns when he sees you following Remus. 

“Yank, what happened?” He gets concerned when he sees your eyes are filled with tears and his blood gets cold when you tell him what happened. 

“You had pictures of my brother?” You tried to tell Sirius it wasn’t like that. You missed his younger brother, your friend. 

You pass Sirius who tried to grab your arm to stop you. 

“Remus, please stop this. Talk to me.” You said walking into the kitchen to see him standing by the sink, his back was towards you. 

Remus says your name and pleads with you to not come towards him. 

“Regulus -.” Remus slams his hands on the counter making you jump.  “Don’t say that name.” Sirius stands by the entrance of the door when Remus snaps. 

“You are being absolutely ridiculous.” Remus turns around by your words. 

“You think I am being ridiculous? Me? I’m not the one who has pictures of their ex, or someone I loved.” 

“I never loved him like I love you.” You repeat it until Remus gets red in the face. 

“How would you feel if you found photographs of Tonks on my nightstand?” His question makes you freeze. Why was he bringing her up into this conversation? This had nothing to do with Sirius’ cousin. 

“I might as well have some then. Something to feel when I’m all alone all fucking day.” He wanted to hurt you and he did. He was throwing your insecurities right at your face. You hear Sirius’ warning Remus to stop with his shenanigans. 

“What do you think?” Remus asked you. 

“Are you trying to tell me something? So you did something with her when I was gone?” The pit of your stomach aches. 

Remus breathes heavily, so upset. So in rage by that photo of Sirius’ little brother in your night stand. He couldn’t stop himself from remembering how he used to watch you walk down the halls with Regulus by your side. He grew even more mad as he remembered how Regulus hugged you. 

“I did.” Remus replied to you. He felt his heart dropped by the look on your face.

“Wait-pleas-YANK!” Sirius stutters as he calls out for you. You had turned around and walked out of the kitchen to the front door. 

“What is wrong with you? Why would you lie to her face? You never did anything with Tonks.” Sirius shouts as he walks back into the kitchen. 

“Right?” Sirius’ voice turned soft when he asked Remus to confirm. “Moony, please.” Remus shuts his eyes at his best friend pleads. 

“She will always choose your brother.” Remus spats out, looking over his shoulder. Sirius shakes his head, not understanding what’s happening to Remus. 

“She married you. She loves you.” Remus ignores Sirius and walks away leaving him in the kitchen. You didn’t return until the next morning. Sirius was waiting in the living room all night for your arrival. Remus stayed in the bedroom, locked up. 

“Sirius?” The dark haired man woke up, he fell asleep last night on the couch waiting for you. 

He frowns when he notices Bill in front of him. 

“Sorry to wake you up but I've been calling for Yankee. I believe no one is home.” Bill said, looking around then at his watch. 

“She should be coming back. Want a cuppa?” Bill nods at Sirius who stands up and tells him to follow him. 

Bill kept silent when he noticed Sirius in a quiet mood, it was odd. Sirius Black wasn’t himself. He usually cracked jokes and told stories. The front door was heard open and Sirius quickly placed the cup of tea in front of Bill and excused himself.  Bill looked over his shoulder when he heard your voice. Sirius is whispering. After a moment, Bill looks back again at the tea cup and takes a sip when he hears footsteps coming into the kitchen. 

“Good morning Bill.” You said walking inside with Sirius behind you. 

“Good morning, apologies if I arrived too early. Sirius told me you weren’t here.” You shook your head. 

“It’s good you’re here early. Give us a head start and go through the plan again.” Bill takes note of your blood shot eyes. You look like you haven’t slept. 

“Good morning Bill.” You tense up when you hear Remus’ voice. He ignores you and Sirius as he goes to the stove to make himself a cup of tea. Sirius glances over at you and his heart breaks when he notices you staring at the table. 

“Morning, Remus.” Bill greets with a smile. 

“How’s your parents? They alright?” Remus asked, looking over his shoulders. Bill nods. 

“They are fine, just a bit worried for today.” Sirius shakes his head at Bill. 

“They shouldn’t fear. You’re with the best auror.” Sirius said, making you look up at him with a small smile. He gives you a wink, trying to cheer you up. 

“Yank, before you leave. I’ll have Kercher make you something to eat. A cup of coffee at least.” You decline Sirius' offer stating it would be best to go early. Bill finishes his tea quickly. Remus still didn’t make eye contact with you. He kept making his tea with his back facing you. 

“Do you mind waiting for me by the door? I’ll be there in a second.” Bill nods and says his goodbye to Sirius and Remus. 

Bill leaves and you look at Remus. You call out his name softly. He doesn’t respond. Sirius is glaring at Remus now. You played with your fingers, looking down at them trying to come up with the words you were thinking. Your mind has been going circles and circles, the images of Remus and Tonks flooded your mind. So you just said what you felt. 

“Remus, I love you.” You were met with silence. You thought there weren't any more tears left in you but you were wrong. You hated a lot of stuff but Remus being mad at you was the worst. Sirius follows you after watching you leave the room when Remus didn’t answer back. 

“Yank.” Sirius grabs your hand and pulls you into his chest. You wrap your arms around his torso, hugging him tight. Sirius pulls away and cups your face. He wipes your tears. 

“He’ll talk when you come back, okay?” You sniff as you nod. 

“Be safe, I love you.” He kisses you on the cheek. 

“I love you too, Si.” You say it back. Bill doesn’t say anything when he sees you wiping your tears. He awkwardly stuff his hands in his pockets and follows you down the stairs. Sirius walks back into the kitchen and sees Remus on the table with his head between his hands. 

“You better talk to her when she comes back. You hear me, Moony? I’m serious. I don’t know what’s going on with you but that shit better stop. You have a good woman. Regulus was a friend to her when she had none. My brother may have loved her but she didn’t love him the way she loved you. Anyone can see how that much that woman fucking loves you!" Sirius walks out and Remus looks ahead. He let his jealousy get the best of him. He had pushed down that anger he had towards Regulus. He never told anyone about his confrontation with the younger Black's brother. 

He never told you how Regulus thought he was a better choice for you. Remus knows you loved Regulus only as a friend and nothing more. Regulus knew it as well but what he told Remus before his disappearance plagued him. 

“I’ll still be here, waiting for the day when she finally realizes that you aren’t good enough for her.” 

Remus slams his hands on the table when he recalls the last word he told you. He never cheated you with Tonks or even had the urge to do anything with her. He did it to hurt you and it worked. He didn’t get any pleasure from it. He cried himself to sleep last night, calling himself an ass for saying that. Remus finishes his cup of tea and feels more in despair when he realizes that you didn’t eat anything. You were still wearing the same clothes from yesterday. He had stolen a quick glance at you when he looked over at Bill. He hoped you at least had your gun on you. He walks to the living room and sits on the couch. You said the max was four hours for the mission. He will wait here for you and talk to you about it. He will tell you everything and hopes you find it in your heart to forgive him. Forgive him for being a complete ass. He was ashamed of himself after everything you’ve done for him. 

Remus leans back with a sigh and stares ahead at the clock above the fireplace. His eyes begin to drippy after a few minutes. 

It was dark and cold in the woods. Remus was absolutely terrified as he ran around. He didn’t know where he was going. He kept going forward, bumping himself into the branches of the trees. He let out a yelp when one of the branches scratched his face. 

He froze when he heard a scream, a woman’s scream.

He looks around trying to see where it came from. He was breathing heavily. It was freezing, so bad that he could see his own breath in the air. A cold sweat had appeared on his forehead. He’s been running for miles. 

There was a horrible howl that made him take a step back. Then a sound of thump, he looks over his shoulder and his eyes widen when he saw someone from his past. 

The person he called The Bloody Man was in front of him. He glared at Remus with his dark eyes, clothes were torn and his blood began to seep through the fabric. Remus felt chills run up and down his spine when the man lay out a bloody smile and grab something from the ground. 

Remus shouts your name when he sees the bloody man grab you by the neck and lifts you up. Only to be slammed by the nearest tree. You were kicking your legs as you began to choke. You are scratching the arms of the bloody man, trying to free yourself. 

“Remus! Remus!” 

Remus woke up with a jump when someone touched his chest. He looks up to see Molly standing over him with a concern look on her face. He sits up and notices Arthur sitting on the couch on the other side. 

“You poor thing, I think you were having a nightmare. I’ll make you some tea.” Molly mothered him then went to the kitchen. 

Sirius walks in, handling Arthur, a glass of fire whiskey. Sirius sits across from Arthur and takes a drink from his own glass. 

“What’s going on?” Remus asked, looking at them. 

“It’s been six hours, Remus. They aren’t back.” Arthur said in a shaky voice.

“They are probably still talking. The community probably liked them so much that they invited them for dinner or something.” Remus tries to reason with Arthur. Molly comes walking in with a hot tea. She gives it to Remus and sits by him. She looks ahead at the fireplace with tears in her eyes. 

“They have to be fine. If something were to happen, they would’ve contacted help immediately.” Sirius said, making Molly nod. 

“You’re right.” Molly's voice betrays her.

It was late now and eight hours had passed. Molly was in tears and Remus was frozen on the couch, his right leg shook frantically as he looked at the fireplace then at the front door. 

Moody and Shacklebolt came after it had been a total of 10 hours that Bill and you haven’t returned. They were trying their best to ease Molly and Arthur's worries. 

“We didn’t receive any call for help.” Remus sighs at Moody's words. 

“If something did happen, we cannot interfere; it will make matters worse.” Shacklebolt told them.

You were strong. You knew how to fight. Nothing bad happened to you, Remus repeated those words in his mind. Molly decided to make dinner for them as they waited. Calling them into the kitchen, they sat around staring at the stew Molly made, they ate quietly.

Then it happened in a second. The front door was slammed open and Bill shouts for Sirius. Molly and Arthur rose up when they heard their son. The others followed, Bill and you walked inside, practically tripping. The redhead boy has your arm over his shoulder as he helps you inside. 

Molly and Arthur rushed towards their son when they saw the state he was at. You pull away from him. Remus saw you tumbling further into the kitchen, making your way to the counter you slid down on the floor with your back against the cabinets. 

He calls out for you and Sirius follows. Remus was about to touch you when you raised your hand to stop him. You’re breathing heavily.

“What happen to you? What happened?” Molly shouted when she sat Bill down. He had a busted lip and his hair was tousled. Bill looks over at you. 

“I’m so sorry. I really am.” Bill says with tears running down his face. Arthur runs his son’s back and looks back at you. You were still sitting on the floor, breathing heavily. Your eyes were drifting into the distance. 

“What happened?” Moody shouts when Bill apologies once more but got no response from you. 

“Yank!” Sirius said, bending down to meet your eyes. You look completely out of it. Looking at you, you don’t look hurt like Bill. He frowns when he notices your fingers are slightly twitching. 

Bill sobs, hiding his face in his hands. Molly was consoling him when they heard knocking, it was the front door. Someone was trying to get in and Bill quickly rose up raising his wand alarming everyone. Your name was being shouted and everyone froze.

“I won’t let them get you. I swear.” Bill shouted as he aimed his wand at the door and everyone got into action. Remus' ears perked at the sound of the door bursting open and footsteps pacing around. Your name is shouted once more. Sirius looked down at you hoping you’ll talk but you showed no emotion. 

The door of the kitchen opens and Bill shouts stop but the person simply vanishes in mid air and Sirius yells when the person apparated in front of you. 

“Captain.” The man knelt beside you. He looked young and had thick blonde hair. It was tied in a low ponytail. He wore all black clothes along with a long black trench coat. 

The man frowns and looks at everyone. “What happened to her?” 

“Who are you?” Bill shouts and Remus aims his wand at the stranger. 

“State your name and purpose, boy.” Moody asks firmly. The man eyed Moody then at you. 

“Morris, is the name. I came because I received a patronus from my captain. I work with her in the states. I’m on her team.” The man said. 

“She sent it to you. I thought-” Bill asked, drawing down his wand then looking at Remus. Morris kneels down again and touches your face. Remus and Sirius frown when Morris pulls back and the palm of his hand is covered with blood. 

“Yank, take your glamor off.” Morris shouts and he cups your face, slightly shaking you. Your eyes don't meet his and Morris sighs. 

“What happened? She’s using the dissociative tactic spell.” Morris shouts at Bill.

“Captain, please come back. I won’t be able to break inside your mind and get you.” Morris pleads as he cups your face again, you don’t speak. Morris grunts before standing up, opening the cabinets like a mad man, looking inside. Sirius shouts as Morris made a mess looking through the spice cabinet. 

Morris grabs a bottle of spices and rips the cap off. He holds it under your nose. Nothing, it didn’t work. Morris throws the spice on the counter in anger. 

“What are you doing?” Remus shouts at him. 

“Trying to bring her back. It’s a tactic we use when being held hostage. We close our minds so no one can read it. We even do it when we are in serious pain.” Morris says looking again through the cabinets. Not finding what he was looking for. He was about to bend down to pick you up when Remus walked towards him. 

“Don’t touch her.” Morris frowns.

“And who the fuck are you?” The man ask Remus. 

“I’m her husband.” Morris’ eyes widen and look up and down at him. Remus flinches when Morris starts to unbutton Remus’ sweater. His fingers quickly worked and Remus shouted at him to not touch him. 

“Give this to me.” Morris shouts practically ripping the buttons of the sweater and pushes Remus out of the way. 

“Cap, smell this. Come on.” Morris kneels beside you and gently puts Remus’ sweater under your nose. Morris was sure it had to work, you would come back with your husband’s scent. When the soft fabric hit your nose, you started to blink. He smiles softly at you when you grab the sweater and cover your face with it. 

“Rem.” You whispered as you looked at your surroundings. “Morris?” You questioned when you looked up and saw the blonde man. 

“Take the glamor off. Let me see, you've been hit. That’s what you said.” You looked down at yourself then back at your surroundings. 

Not in front of them. Morris hears you speak to him in his mind and Morris looks at everyone. 

“Everyone out of this room now.” Remus shakes his head. 

“I’m not leaving her alone with you.” Remus said with Sirius standing behind him. 

Morris’ eyes harden for a second. He hears you again and kneels by you staring into your eyes. He frowns when you show him the events leading into the mission. He saw everything, Remus froze when he heard a growl. Bill was about to step towards you when Morris quickly got up and hissed at Bill.

Bill flinched when he saw Morris’ face change completely. His jaw unhinged and his teeth became large fangs. His blue eyes turned pitch black, the veins under his eyes became visible. He looked horrifying. Moody and Shacklebolt quickly had their wand aimed at Morris, ready to attack. Molly grabbed Bill and pushed him away from Morris. 

“You purebloods are all the fucking same. I swear to god.” He hissed at Bill, who was hiding behind his mother. 

“Easy there vampire.” Moody shouts. 

“I’m sure the world won’t miss one pureblood.” Morris said as the table and chairs in the kitchen began to shake. 

“Morris.” Your voice was harsh and loud.

It snapped him out of his angry haze and his face changed back to normal. Molly and Arthur gasped when they looked at you. The glamor you had on vanished. Bill and the rest was left shocked by your appearance. Remus calls your name soft as he kneels beside you. You were beaten badly, the side of your face was bruised up. Your clothes were soaked with blood, you held your stomach with one hand. Your body trembled horribly. 

“It’s not his fault.” You whispered before wincing loudly when you moved your leg. Remus and Sirius spring into action, grabbing the first aid kit. Moody and Shacklebolt were about to walk towards you to help when you asked for Morris. The vampire was quick and helped you up. You let out a few tears and look up at him. 

“My stomach.” You hissed as the kitchen table slid towards him. He helps you lean against it. 

“If you ain’t helping then get the fuck out.” Morris shouts at the audience looking at both of you. 

Bill sighs before leaning over to talk to you. “I’m so sorr-.” Bill doesn’t get to finish his sentence. Morris apparated behind Bill and grabs him by the neck. Slamming him against the kitchen wall. Bill shouts when Morris lifts up in the air, his long limbs dangled as he tries to break free. 

“You say you are sorry but you are the reason she’s beaten. You are the reason, you pretentious pureblood.” 

“Morris. Let him go.” You shouted with all your might, you cried out when you removed the hand from your stomach. Remus goes to help you but you shouts at him. 

“NO.” Remus freezes. Your voice is hard but your body is shaking. Your eyes are wide and glossy. 

 “Bill, go now and make a report while it’s still fresh in your mind, do it before you forget anything.” Morris released Bill from his grip and walked past the Wesley's parents. Moody had his eye on him as Morris walked towards you. 

Bill nods at you and his parents follow him out of the kitchen. Not before glancing over at the pair on the other side of the room, Remus and Sirius. 

“Moody. Shacklebolt. Please tell Dumbledore, they know I’m here. The Death Eaters know I’m back. It’s only a matter of time before the one in the states starts coming.” You said as Morris offered you his hand and you took it. Remus’ hands shook when you completely leaned against Morris' tall frame. 

They nod at you and leave the kitchen. You finally look at Remus and Sirius. 

“Leave. Morris will help me.” Remus shakes his head and Sirius grabs a hold of his arm when Remus begins to walk towards Morris and you. 

“Morris, please” You whimpered as he helped you get on the table. 

“Yank, let us take you to the St. Muggle.” Sirius begs. 

Morris grabs the kit from Remus’ hand. “She can’t go there. That’s the first place they would look for her.” Morris tells him. 

“Try to keep your eyes open .” Morris whispered to you but it didn’t even matter. The moment you laid your head down on the table you lost consciousness and the last thing you heard was Remus shouting your name. 

The morning came and you still haven’t woken up. Morris had spent all night tending to your wounds. You laid on the bed in the bedroom as Morris wiped the blood under your fingernail. You fought hard, he can see that. He cleaned you the best he could, it was the first time and he was sure it would be the last but this was the first time you lost consciousness with him. That didn’t sit well with him. You were so strong but now you looked like you were at the brink of death. Morris hears footsteps outside the bedroom and he rolls his eyes at the scent of a pureblood. 

“If you are a vampire, how can you handle the smell of blood right in front of you?” Sirius asked, walking back into the room with a bowl of clean water. Morris glances over his shoulder to see Remus standing by the doorway. Sirius hands him a clean rag and takes the dirty one. 

“I have self-control.” Morris responded. “I feed on animals and my enemies sometimes.” 

“She never told me about you.” Remus said as Morris wiped your hands. 

“She tells me everything.” Morris sighs at him. 

“Obviously she doesn’t.” He snaps at Remus, deciding your husband needs a wake up call after what Morris had seen. He was beginning to despise him just as he did with Sirius. 

“If you must know.” Morris drops the rag on the bowl on the nightstand and stands up from the bed. He covers your body with the blanket and takes the bowl in his hand. 

“She doesn’t want you to get hurt.” Remus frowns, he doesn't understand.

“The first time I’ve met her. She told me to never ask about you. All I know is that she was married to a werewolf. Most aurors do it to keep their partners hidden because they want them to stay safe. If anyone knows what you look like and what your name is. You would be taken and used for leverage. She has many enemies and they are dying to hurt her. Killing her husband will be the first thing they do.” 

Remus tries to keep his tears in bay as he glances over at you. He feels more of an asshole now than ever to have thought that you would love him less. He soon realized that might have been the reason he was treated the way he was when he came to the state after getting a call when you were rescued after that horrendous mission. 

“It’s funny.” Morris says and gives the bowl to Sirius. He looks back at Remus. 

“You are not what I expected. She was not in her right state of mind when she showed me her memories. She accidentally showed me her memories from the day before.” Remus looks away from Morris’ harsh gaze. 

“Remus Lupin, the husband of The American. The team and I thought too much of you. We were wrong to put you up on a pedestal. Thinking you are this amazing guy to capture her heart but what you really are is a piece of shit.” Sirius huffs and puts the bowl on top of the dresser. 

“That’s uncalled for.” He says looking at Morris who just stared at Remus. 

“All the times she could have cheated on you. The men and women that threw themselves onto her while on the job. I bet she never told you that as well.” Morris said with a grin trying to rile up Remus who remained silent. 

“I’ll watch over her. You both can leave now.” Morris said, walking away from Remus. 

“I’ll come later so you can rest.” Sirius said and Morris shakes his head. 

“No need.” Morris replied. “I don’t sleep. I’m a vampire.” 

“It was my fault the plan went horrible. I thought she was doing too much, planning too much. She wanted to check the perimeter around the community but I refused. I refused to follow her orders because I thought I knew better than her and because I wasn't the cruel person, she was.” Bill spoke out. 

“So I went to the entrance of the community and she followed me. If we would’ve checked the perimeter, we would have known that the community was overrun. The community was being held hostage by Death Eaters. They beat me first until one of them recognized her.” You took a deep breath as Bill continued on with the story. 

“They had me in a room and pulled her to another room next to me. They were beating her, screaming at her and taunting her. It went on for hours until I heard them screaming. She found me and helped me out. She fought bravely and as we found a way out. We saw the citizens of the community locked in cages.” The Order of the Phoenix held their breath at that last sentence. Everyone sat around the table, Morris stood behind you with his arms crossed over his chest. 

His jaw was clenched as he stared at Bill. Morris looked like a guard dog, behind you. You haven’t spoken to Remus or Sirius since you woke up. 

Morris told them, to let you breathe. One's body goes through tremendous pain when being crucio so many times. Sirius agreed with that, he had suffered from the hand of his mother. 

Your body shook every once and a while. Your eyes seemed to drift off into the wall then back at Bill who had apologized numerous times. You forgive the kid, what more can you do but you did tell him this. 

“Pull that shit again and I’ll leave you behind.” 

You look over at Dumbledore who arrived as soon as he heard the message and conducted a meeting to find out what occurred. His blue eyes softened whenever he saw your body shivered. Your face was healed but those shakes didn’t heal fast enough. 

“Morris and I think they are using mind control on them. Perhaps scaring them enough to make them fight in this war.” You spoke with a hoarse voice. 

“They are just normal people. They probably never fought, how can they be used as weapons?” Molly asked. 

“Werewolf isn't normal, Molly. They are stronger and quicker even without them in their wolf form. Plus, with a leader, leading them. They can cause trouble.” You answered her. 

“That man.” Billy started to speak as he looked over at you. 

“The man that took you. He had to be their leader.” You nod softly. You took another deep breath to control your emotions. You can still feel his hands on you. You can still remember how he sniffed you and licked your wound when he realized who you were and when he realized who you were bonded to. 

“What man?” Moody asked. 

“Fenrir Greyback.” You said, rubbing your hands under the table to control the shakes. 

“He did that to you?” Remus asked, looking over at you and you finally met his gaze. Remus’ face paled and you felt a rush of emotions fill you. 

“And how upset he is.” Severus said as he walked into the kitchen. He walks in and sets your dark eyes on you. 

“You killed 12 of his men.” Severus’ words make you look down at the table. You needed a second, you weren’t in the mood to deal with the double agent. He walked over toward you and Morris was quick to get in front of him. Both men stared down and Severus gets something from the pocket of his cloak. 

He sets it down on the wooden table. 

“For the shakes. From what I heard, you are lucky to be alive from the amount of crucio they did on you. They were gloating at the fact they caught you.” Severus slides the potion in front of you before walking back to the door frame of the kitchen. Remus drops his head in defeat. 

“Careful Severus, this animal here might think you have a heart.” You said looking over at him when you grabbed it with shaky hands. Severus doesn’t say anything, he lowers his gaze when he sees you were unable to open it. You had a frown on your face when your fingers shook frantically. Morris was quick to step in, opening it for you. 

“He’s your guard dog?” Severus asked, looking at the man behind you. Glancing over at Morris, you nodded at him. Telling him to continue with an introduction.

“Name is Morris. I am, a half blood and a vampire. I am second in command of Team Black of the ministry of magic of the states.” He said looking at everyone. 

“So that means you are?” Molly asked looking at you as you drank the potion in one gulp.

“Captain Lupin.” Morris answers her looking down at you.

"Team Black." Moody repeats before looking over at Shacklebolt, who's eyes widen. 

"You heard of us then?" You asked them. They nod.

"You're top three of the most dangerous team in the states." Moody said.

"Yet, you still got capture. how?" Severus asked, you sighed at him.

"It was my fault." Bill told him and he shakes his head. "You're telling me the most powerful witch was able to get capture by them."

Morris glares at him and you try to to ignore Remus' stares.

"Well, I was having an off day, Severus." You admit to him. All you can think was how much you failed Remus as a wife.

"Your so called off day, might of cost us our lives." Severus says.

"They are coming. He sent word for them." He adds making you look away.

“They were going to come whether or not they found her here. What do we do now?” Bill asked, looking around the room. 

“We look for other people to join.” Moody said, stomping his cane. 

“And the people in the community?” You asked him. 

“We can’t help them. We don’t have the people for it.” You shake your head at him. 

“Give me a two weeks to recover. I’ll break them free.” Everyone except Morris stares at you surprisingly. 

“You can’t. They were beasts. Those men almost killed you.” Bill shouts at you, not believing what you just said.

“They almost did but I'm alive. I refuse to leave those people in there. They were in cages, chained. Who knows what Greyback is doing to them.” Everyone glances at each other. 

“We can’t risk our life for that. We are only a few.” Moody told you.

“That’s why I said I will go. I’m not looking for permission. I am telling you what I am going to do. I'm going to free them.” Dumbledore looks at you with the smallest of smile. In his eyes, you really haven’t changed a bit.

“Bill said there were many, Yank.” Arthur commented looking at you with a concerned look. 

“She won’t be going alone.” Morris said. You look back at him. 

“I can’t ask you to do that, Mo. This isn’t your fight.” You said softly. 

Morris has been your second in command for about 9 years. You met the vampire when you were doing a mission. You found him wounded, a couple of pureblood folks who aren’t too keen on half blood wizards tried to kill him but they left him as one of them, a vampire. 

“I’m not leaving you alone. Plus, I can’t wait to sink my teeth in some pureblood dipshits.” Morris tells you as he glances over at Bill. You had forgiven Bill Wesley but Morris still hasn’t. He still had a tough time with pureblood wizards. 

“Are you sure about this?” Dumbledore asked you.

“I can’t risk other members.” The headmaster's voice was soft. 

“That’s fine but I don’t think I can live with myself, knowing those people and their children are in cages, suffering from the hands of that sick fuck. I will not ignore them, it's not right.” You spoke. 

“Very well, then.” Dumbledore said to you. The meeting ended after that and Molly went by your side, hugging you. She told you how Bill told her how you saved Bill many times when trying to escape. Morris kept his distance when The Wesley family stood by you. Sirius and Remus stayed in the back, listening to Molly. 

Remus froze in place when you called for Severus. The tall dark haired man was stunned for a second that you called for him. Excusing yourself from Molly, you asked Severus to walk with you to the living room. Severus nods before glancing back and seeing Remus staring back at him. 

“Relax.” Sirius whispers to his friend. 

“How am I supposed to relax when the man that turned me into a monster hurt my wife?” Remus snaps back at Sirius. His eyes shined with tears as he stared at Sirius. 

Everyone froze at Remus’ words and Sirius was quick to grab Remus from his arm pulling him further away from the table. Sirius was about to speak when they heard your voice. 

“Is everything okay?” Remus looks over his shoulder at you. Molly was the first to respond. 

“Yes, we were all just heading out. Right?” Molly asked, looking around, giving everyone a hard stare. Morris sighs then walks over towards you. Remus glares as the tall vampire leans over and whispers something in your ear. Morris then vanishes in thin air after you gave him a nod. 

When everyone left, Sirius and Remus along with you were the only ones left. Sirius looked between you and Remus. 

“I would like to speak with you, please.” You said looking at Remus, who nodded immediately and followed you out the room. Following you up the stairs to the guest room. 

Remus was glad the potion Severus given you worked, there was some color on your cheeks and you have not shaken. He didn’t like the awkwardness in the air and he knew it was his fault. It was his fault for being a complete idiot and being angry towards you.  He wanted to blame it on Mooney, but he knew he couldn’t. It was all his fault. This was all Remus. 

“Remus- I..” 

“I’m sorry.” Remus cuts you off as he shuts the door behind him. You look away from him when he repeats it. 

“I shouldn’t have gotten mad for some photos.” You shook his head before walking towards him. 

“Stop and let me speak.” Your tone was hard and sharp. His chest was feeling tight. Years being together, you have never spoken to him like that. 

“I know the cottage is under your name but I would like to spend some time there. I’ll heal there and when I’m ready I’m going to free those people.” Remus’ brows knitted together, confused.

“Afterwards, I’ll leave and go back to the states.” Remus’ heart starts to break and he starts to breathe heavily. 

“I’ll ask the ministry to get the paperwork started.” Remus shouts your name when he realized what you were getting at.

“What are you talking about?! Divorce?” Remus is grabbing your hand, he pulls you close. 

“Isn’t this what you wanted?” You asked him softly not understanding why he was getting emotional. 

“You can finally be with Tonks. You slept with her because I wasn’t here. I wasn’t a good wife. I left you alone for too long.” Remus grabs your face with his hands, pulling you in for a kiss but you pushed him away. Remus whines but doesn’t let you go.

“I didn’t sleep with her. I swear. I just said that to get back at you. I swear it, baby.” Remus says as tears began to run down his handsome face. 

“Remus..please.” He shakes his head as you try to pull away from him. 

“I’ll show you. You can look inside of my mind and see. I have nothing to hide.” Remus exclaimed when he saw how serious you were. 

“Please. Look. Look inside.” Remus sobs when he pulls you to sit on the bed. He faces you and your heart breaks seeing him like this. He’s crying and he pulls your face to lean his forehead against yours. 

“I was hurt.” He whispered against your lips. “Angry. I acted out like a child and hurt you. I lied.” 

“After all these years, I’m jealous of him.” You sighed at Remus and pull away from his face. 

“Why?” You snapped with your own tears running down your face. “Why are you jealous of him, Remus. I don’t understand.” 

You pull your hands from his hold and stand up from the bed, needing space from him. 

“Why can't you see that I have always been yours? I  was yours the moment you kissed me. The moment you told me you loved me.” You looked around the room for a moment before landing your eyes on Remus. 

“I was yours the moment you wanted nothing in return. Do you remember that day?”  Remus nods. 

He looks ahead at you. All he can do is curse at himself, how can he be so stupid? So blind at the fact that you love him and he thought otherwise. He couldn’t believe he was letting your friend from school who’s long gone get between both of you. 

“Can you ever forgive me?” Remus asked softly. 

You took a deep breath before wiping your tears from your face. Walking over towards him, you knelt down in front of him. You held on to his hands so he wouldn’t touch you. 

You knew the moment he touched you, you couldn’t pull away from him. Remus frowned when you looked up at him. Your eyes are searching deep into his. 

“Did you sleep with Tonks?” You asked him. 

“No, never.” Remus answered quickly. You didn’t need to look in his memory. Years being married, you knew when Remus was lying. 

“You lied to hurt me then?” You asked and he nodded. You gently squeezed his hands when you felt a pang of pain deep in your chest. Remus’ eyes widened when you pushed yourself up to stand.

“I've been hurt before. I’ve been lied to, tricked and betrayed. I suffered and learned how to deal with that pain.” Remus stood up when you walked to the door. You look over your shoulder and stare at him for a moment. 

“I would have never thought that you would be the one to hurt me. Lying to me just to hurt me because you were jealous of a friend. Who I should remind you that showed me kindness when I had none in the beginning. In a school where I was heavily and brutally bullied for simply being a muggle born, a American and a Slytherin.” You sobbed. 

“I would have been home sooner when we were captured but a part of me thought that I deserved the beating and all the crucio. The thought of failing you and failing as a wife hurt more than all the bullying I had endured in my youth .” Remus gave you a pained face. 

“I wanted to die then I heard Bill on the other side and I knew if I died. He was going to be next. I couldn’t let that happen not after what his parents did for Harry. Then Greyback..-.” You stopped in mid sentence for a second and looked at Remus. 

You were angry but you love him. Even now you still love him. Remus rose up from the bed. You took a step back when he reached for you. Your back hit the door and Remus held on to your arms. “Tell me., what happened?” Remus asked with a worried expression. 

“They wanted to rape me.” Remus' mouth dropped softly and his hold on you tightened. 

“But he smelled you on me.” A soft whine escaped from your mouth as you remember him bending you over. 

“How does he remember me after all these years?” Remus asked and all you can do is stare at him. Staring at his face as tears rolled down his slim cheeks. 

“You know?” He asked, your back hits the door and all you can do is look up at him with tears running down your face. 

“You’re his favorite.” You told him what Greyback told you after smelling you and finding your mark. The hair on the back of Remus’ neck stood up. Remus’ blinks his own tears away and cups your face with his hands. 

“He wants you.” You whisper. 

“The moment he said that I knew if I didn’t do anything and they broke me to the point they could search my mind. He would have found you and I couldn’t let that happen. Something snapped in me, something horrible came over me and I killed them but he escaped. That coward had shielded himself with a Death Eater.” 

“Forgive me for ever doubting your love for me. I am truly and wholeheartedly sorry. I feel so ashamed. Did they?” Remus asked and you knew what he meant. Shaking your head no, Remus looks relief and pulls you into his chest holding you tight, he kisses your forehead. 

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Remus repeats it. 

“I’m going to stay for a few nights at the cottage.” Remus freeze and looks down at you. 

“What?” He whispered not believing what he was hearing. 

You shake your head when he says your name.  “Please.” 

“Stop it.” You responded and stepped away. 

“I just need some time apart. Please, I need to clear my mind.” Remus’ heart was beating out of his chest. 

“Then I leave and you stay here. I'll move into a different room. I’ll move into a different house.” Remus said. 

“I need to speak with Sirius then I’m leaving.” Remus frantically shook his head as he walked in front of you trying to grab the door knob before you. 

“I love you. You can’t leave. You can’t divorce me. I don’t know what else to say. I’m sorry, baby.” Remus cries to you. His voice cracks as he looks down at you. As much as you walked to use magic on him to let you leave you couldn’t, you hugged him, surprising him but he welcomed it. Wrapping his own arms around you tightly. 

“I love you.” You whispered to Remus. 

“Let me go, if you love me too. Let me take my space for now.” He shakes his head. 

“Please.” You whisper against his lips. “Please.” 

Pressing your lips against him, you cup his face. Remus kisses you back as his arms drop to his sides. Pulling away from him he nods at you. 

“Take all the time you need but come back to me.” Remus says as you open the door. You nod at him and walk out the door, leaving him inside. 

Sirius was sitting by the kitchen. His elbow on the table as he chewed on his bottom lip. The tea in front of him was cold now, he was happy there was no screaming or crying. That must mean good news.

He hears footsteps coming down the stairs and he sees you walking toward the kitchen. His heart drops when he doesn’t see Remus behind you. 

“Hey.” Your voice is flat and you wouldn’t look him in the eye. He grows more worried by the second. 

“Hi.” Sirius answers you when you sit across from him. 

“I’m thinking of spending a few days in the cottage until I recover. I need some space and to get well before going on this mission.” You tell him.

“It’ll be lonely without you guys but if you have to go then that’s fine.” Sirius raised his brows when you shook your head. 

“Not us. Only me. Remus will be staying here.” You avoided his gaze. 

“Yankee, what’s going on?” Sirius asked. “Don’t you lie to me?” 

“I just need some time alone.” Sirius frowns. “Why?” 

You scuff at him and stood up. “Why, you ask? Maybe because I was just beaten, and almost raped by Death Eaters who have a community caged like animals. Maybe I want time alone because my husband lied about sleeping with some girl to get back at me. Lied to me because he was jealous of my friend. Maybe because I need time to practice on my magic so I can kill that motherfucker that hurt Remus when he was child. Kill him for hurting me.” You shouted and Sirius stood up when he saw you were crying. 

“Come here.” He whispered as he grabbed your hand and pulled you into a hug. You sobbed into Sirius’ chest, his chin under your head as he held you. 

“Yank, I know you want to leave but stay here at least. Stay in my study room but don’t leave. We have to stick together. Remus and you are in a tough patch, he’s an idiot but he loves you. I didn’t believe him when he said he slept with Tonks. Remus looks at you like you’re the only witch in the world.” Sirius grabs your hand and pulls you to walk with him, further downstairs where the study room is at. 

You followed him without hassle. Knowing Sirius, he wasn’t going to let you walk out of this house without a fight. Following him into the dark hallway. The door opens and you stand by the door frame. Sirius turns on the light and the atmosphere is warm. The scent of cigarette and lavender is in the air. 

“If you need the place bigger. I’m sure the mighty witch before me knows how to conjure a larger room.” You smile at his words and Sirius looks at you. Sirius never had a sister, Lily felt like a mother to him.

However, he felt like an older brother to you and you were his little sister. He even said it to you after a night of an entire bottle of fire whiskey during the last year of Hogwarts. He admired you and even more when you told the Order of the Phoenix that you were planning on rescuing those people. 

“I want to help, Yank.” Sirius said as you walked around the room, looking at the books on the shelves. 

“Help with what?” You asked him as you picked up a book from the table near you. 

“With rescuing those people. I want to help.” Sirius said, walking to the love seat. You sat next to him, looking over at him. 

“Hearing, you said that you don’t think you can live with the fact that they are caged. I can’t either, I've been in a cage for 12 years. I don’t want anyone to experience that. Let me help you, sis.” 

<- Chapter 2

Taglist: @callsignwidow , @avitute , @hermionelove, @wingedhallows , @ivet4

[loveesiren]

Doing It All For Us (Pt. 13)

Masterlist

Rafe Cameron x Reader

Summary: Y/n has a little scare but it's not as bad as what's to come...

Warnings: Fluff, braxton hicks

Word Count: 4.3k+

Rafe blinked awake, his vision blurred as his face was pressed deep into the pillow. He reached for his phone, low growl spilling from his throat as he tried to wake up. He rubbed his eyes and unlocked his screen. The clock read 12:15. "Shit..." He muttered.

"Good afternoon, sleepy head!" You cood from the bathroom door.

Rafe rolled on his side and took in the sight of you. "Beautiful girl..." He hummed. You looked flawless in a flowing white sundress, strappy wedges, and a tan sun hat sitting atop your head. You had neutral colors for your make up today which made your Y/E/C eyes pop. "How are you this perfect?"

You smirked at his compliment. "Get up, baby. Topper and Kelce want to meet at the club."

Rafe gathered his thoughts, still lost in the beauty that stood before him. Shit, he had to meet Courtney to pick out a ring. He got up and pulled on his jeans. "You go ahead, sweetheart. I have to help my dad with something."

"Are you sure?" You asked, putting your earrings in. "I can come with if you want."

"No, sweet girl," He said, kissing your temple. "Go. Eat. Have fun. I'll meet you back here later, yeah? Then we'll put on a movie and I'll rub your feet until you fall asleep."

You smiled up at him. "That sounds perfect."

He places a soft, tender kiss to your lips before crouching down to kiss your belly. "Later kid, be good for your momma!"

You chuckled as you watched Rafe leave the room, continuously glancing back to get one last look at you. You took one last look in the mirror before gathering your purse and making your way down stairs. You set the alarm and locked the door before heading to your Benz Truck. Your car. The car you've barely touched since you moved here. You've had the luxury of being chauffeured around by your fiance and friends all year.

You climbed in and noticed you'd need to adjust your seat as your baby bump pressed against the steering wheel. "Been a while," You laughed to yourself. You adjusted the seat to your comfort and checked all your mirrors. You felt really...independent. And you weren't sure if you liked it. You missed Rafe. You wondered what he and his dad were up to today. But, to be honest, you needed a break from everything going on and lunch with your friends sounded great. You started the car and took off.

-

Rafe stepped off the ferry and scanned the crowd, spotting Courtney pretty quickly. "Hey Court," He greeted.

"So you really proposed to my best friend on a whim? No plan, no ring? You're supposed to let me help you plan!" She scolded.

Rafe chuckled. "I'm sorry. I couldn't wait."

"So where'd you do it?" Courtney asked as they began walking towards the town.

"In my room at the Bahama house. She puked the whole plane ride there, poor thing. She was so tired when we got there we just went straight to my room." He said, purposely leaving out the part about the gold. He'd save that for another time. "She just looked so beautiful in the late sun, I couldn't wait."

"That girl could turn into an ogre and you'd still call her beautiful," Courtney laughed.

"Nothing could take away her beauty." Rafe said softly, picturing your face in his mind. God he missed you. It hadn't even been two hours.

Courtney grabbed Rafe's hand and dragged him towards the jewelry store. "Come on, lover boy. She deserves a proper proposal and a fat diamond!"

Rafe owned nice jewelry. Gold chains, nice watches, his signature signet ring. But he had never, ever bought jewelry for a girl until you walked into his life. The diamond R necklace he had gifted you was something he stumbled upon on a TikTok. Now obviously, that jewelry was cheap and he'd never let a $5 zinc necklace touch your perfect skin. So he had a necklace custom made for you. But this was different. This was huge. This was a symbol of the love he had for you. Something you'd wear proudly for the rest of your life making it known you were taken. Owned. A Cameron.

He was overwhelmed with all the gleaming rocks reflecting in the glass cases. He didn't know where to begin. He followed Courtney, looking where she looked, trying to take mental notes of things she pointed out on each ring.

"And who are we shopping for today?" The store clerk asked. "Ah, aren't you Ward Cameron's son? Rafe?"

"Uh, yes ma'am." Rafe replied, caught off guard.

"We're looking for the perfect engagement ring for my best friend!" Courtney squealed. "Uh, his girlfriend." Courtney gestured to Rafe.

"Fiance," Rafe corrected.

"Oh yeah, he proposed without a ring. Can you believe that?! Now I have to help him find the perfect one!"

"Well, congratulations! I'd love to help you find the right one. My name is Renee." The clerk said kindly. "Tell me about your fiance!"

"Oh no, here we go..." Courtney said under her breath but still smiling as she looked up at Rafe.

Rafe eyes were bright and he beamed with excitement. "She's immaculate. She's beautiful, like a goddess, especially when the sun hits her eyes, they shine like diamonds. Her voice is like honey, soft and sweet. I could listen to her talk all day. And her smile..wow..out of this world. She brightens up the whole room, no, the whole event! You can feel her presence when she's near. She's strong, like a lion. Vicious when she needs to be. Bat shit crazy and insanely fun. I've never been bored around her. She's resilient. She's like hypnotic when she moves her body and -"

"Okay, big guy!" Courtney says, patting him on the shoulder. "I'm gonna stop you right there."

Renee chuckles. "Absolutely smitten with her, I see."

"She's my everything." Rafe smiles softly.

"Follow me," Renee says, gesturing them over towards a case in the back of the store. "Now, I don't usually show these to our younger customers, this is our priciest collection, but it is also our nicest, and guaranteed to last a lifetime. Longer than a lifetime. If she is buried in this ring, it will still be perfect centuries from now."

Rafe winced at the thought of you buried in the dirt. He didn't like that image. But he knew he'd be right beside you if you were.

"But seeing as you are a Cameron, and absolutely over the moon for this woman, I thought I'd let you take a peek."

Rafe stared down at the absolute stunning 20-karat emerald cut diamond ring that sat before him. It was perfect. It was perfect like you.

"Now, I also have some lovely options over here, a bit smaller, but bold with personality-"

"I'll take it." Rafe said, cutting Renee off and stopping Courtney in her tracks.

"Son, this ring goes for one million dollars," Renee chuckles.

"Rafe, I know you're rich but shit dude you don't have to drop a milli on this ring. She'll be happy if you gave her a piece of string, dude." Courtney said.

Rafe smiled, thinking about all the money he now had. "This is the one. I'll take it."

-

"So Rafe really proposed? No ring or anything? And you said yes?" Topper asks once again.

You laugh as you swallow the last bite of your salmon. "Sure did! I don't need a ring. I just need him."

"He still has to get a ring though, I mean come on!" Kelce added.

"You know what's funny? Before I moved here, before I met Rafe, I was so materialistic. I suppose I still am with some things. But all the guys I dated in high school always got me expensive jewelry and bags and all that shit. I loved it. It made me feel loved and powerful. Like I was better than everyone else. But now? Now, I don't know. Rafe makes me feel loved in different ways...better ways. If we lost all our money tomorrow and had to live on the cut, I'd be okay with it. As long as I was with him."

Kelce and Topper smile. It took everything in them not to tell you Rafe was out looking for a ring right now.

"Well boys, this has been lovely. But a bitch is tired and I need a nap." You say with a smile as you begin to gather your things and stand up. The boys stand up with you, ready to walk you to your car.

You gasped loudly, falling back into your seat and clutching your stomach. "Fuck!" You screamed.

"Y/n? What's wrong?!" Kelce asked, both boys quickly by your side.

You took a few breaths. "I - ah! I don't know!" You had a sharp pain in your abdomen that you hadn't experienced before. "I-I think something's wrong - ow, fuck! - with the baby!"

"Okay, let's get you to the hospital now." Topper said, scooping you up in his arms and rushing towards the exit. Kelce grabbed your things and followed suit. Topper got you in the car, sliding in beside as Kelce drove as quickly as possible.

You were trying your best to breathe but you were terrified. You weren't even in your third trimester yet. You couldn't be in labor could you? "Call...Rafe..." You said between breaths.

"On it," Topper said as he took out his phone to call Rafe.

-

Rafe pulled out his phone, signing the last signature on the paperwork for your ring. "It's Top," he says to Courtney.

"He better not of squealed." She sighed as she took the bag from Renee's hand, thanking her for all her help.

"What's up, Top?" Rafe said as he answered the phone.

"Dude! Something is wrong with Y/n and the baby!"

"What?! What do you mean?!" Rafe stood up quickly and ran out of the store.

Courtney grabbed the ring and stored it safely in her backpack before running out after him.

"I don't know dude! Everything was fine and then she just like toppled over in pain. We're on our way to the hospital right now."

"Rafe, hurry!" He heard your pained voice cry out in the background.

"I-I'm on my way! I'll be there soon, baby, I promise!" Rafe said before the call disconnected.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" Rafe said, pacing back and forth.

"What's going on?!" Courtney asked.

"Y/n's in pain. Something with the baby. Fuck I need to get there now but the ferry is two fucking hours, I-"

"Dude! I took my dad's helicopter here! It's just a mile up the road, come on!" Courtney said.

Rafe breathed a slight sigh of relief before they both took off running.

"Renaldo!" Courtney called as she approached the helipad.

"Ms. Fields, are-"

"We have to go now! It's an emergency!" Courtney yelled.

"Okay, okay! Let's go!" Renaldo responded. "We'll be there in about 15 to 20 minutes, Ms. Fields."

Rafe's leg was shaking with anxiety as they flew over the water. Extremely grateful in this moment that he was friends with Courtney. Her dad was one of a handful of people on the island that owned a personal helicopter to use at their disposal. 15 minutes. He reminded himself, but it still felt like hours.

"We can land pretty close to the hospital. We'll be there soon!" Courtney reassured him.

Rafe chewed on his finger, a million thoughts going through his head. Was the baby okay? Were you okay? He felt guilty for not being by your side. The one time he leaves the island something horrible had to happen.

The second the helicopter touched the ground, Rafe hopped out and started running. Courtney thanked her pilot and took off after him. They made it to the hospital in record time and Rafe burst through the front doors, almost breaking them off their hinges.

"Y/n Y/l/n! My fiance! Wh-where is she?!" He asked the nurse at the front desk, causing a scene in the waiting room.

"Let's see here..." The nurse said as she grabbed her clipboard and looked over names.

"Now!" Rafe demanded.

"Sir, do not give me attitude. I'm trying -" She was quickly cut off by Topper's voice.

"Rafe! She's in here!"

Rafe discarded the nurse and ran to your room. There you sat, once again in a hospital bed for a horrifying reason. He never wanted to see you in a hospital again unless it was for the birth of your baby. But you were sitting up, smiling and talking to the nurse.

Rafe walked in slowly, chest heaving and sweat soaking through his shirt from the anxiety and running. "Baby...What's going on? Are you okay?" He asked, coming to your side and taking your hand.

You smiled at him. "I'm okay, baby. I promise. So is Wolfie."

Rafe was confused. He had prepared himself for the worst but nothing seemed to be wrong. Still, he checked over you for anything out of place which made you giggle.

"Braxton hicks," The nurse chimed in.

"Brax...what?" Rafe asked, as he leveled his breathing.

"Braxton hicks. They are essentially false contractions. Definitely scary if you aren't sure what they are, but they are harmless. All is okay. We gave her some medicine for the pain. I just have to finish up a bit of paperwork and she should be set to go home." The nurse smiled and excused herself from the room.

Rafe breathed a sigh of relief and pressed his forehead to yours, placing one hand on your swollen belly. "So you're okay? You're both okay?"

You laid your hand on top of Rafe's. "We're okay, baby. I promise. Just tired. I'm about ready for that foot rub." You teased which pulled a smile out of Rafe.

"Topper and Kelce went to get your car."

"Where's your truck?" You ask, wondering how he got here.

"Uh...it's at the dock."

You furrowed your brows. "The dock? Were you on the mainland?"

"I'll tell you later, baby. I promise. For now, let's get you home and keep you off your feet for a few days."

You wondered what exactly was going on, but everything had been so crazy lately and quite frankly, you were exhausted. All that mattered was that Rafe was here now.

-

Rafe drove your car home while you relaxed in the passenger seat, trailing your fingers over the sensitive skin of your stomach. Wolf was kicking ever so lightly, also tired from his big day.

Rafe hopped out of the car and quickly came to your side, as he always did. He helped you out of the car, grabbing all your things and walking you to the door.

"Are you hungry, sweet girl?" He asked as you entered the house.

"A little." You admitted. "Can we just order in and watch a movie?"

"Of course, baby. You go on upstairs, I'll be up in a minute, okay?"

"Okay," You agreed with a smile and headed up to your room. You worked on getting out of your clothes and taking off your make up before settling into bed and scrolling Netflix.

Rafe took out his phone to order food and call his dad.

W: Hello?

R: Dad, hey.

W: Hey, son. How's Y/n?

R: She's okay. The baby is okay.

W: Good. That's good.

R: Uh, hey dad? The gold is secured right?

W: Yes, son, it is. Why?

R: Ahah..Uhhh I kind of got Y/n a ring today.

W: That's great!

R: Yeah, I'm excited to give it to her, but uh...

W: But what, Rafe?

R: It was kind of....a million dollars.

W: Jesus Christ, Rafe, what the fuck!"

R: Hey a milli isn't that bad now that we have the gold right?!

W: *sigh* Atleast you're marrying rich.

R: I'm not marrying her for money, dad.

W: I know, son. I know. Just, uhh...Yeah. The gold is secured. Just go take care of your fiance and my grandson, okay?

R: On it, dad. I love you.

Rafe hung up the phone and smiled. He walked upstairs to find you in the bathroom, rubbing lotion on your swollen belly while your silky pink pajamas clung loosely to your skin. You were humming softly as you cradled your belly. He leaned his head against the doorframe of the bathroom and smiled as he soaked in your beauty.

"Hey, mamas," He said softly.

You turned to look at him and smiled. He'd never seen such glowing beauty before. Your face was bare, your hair pulled back, there you stood, swollen with his child. It was the most beautiful sight he'd ever laid eyes on. Like a thousand summer sunsets. This was all his. His family. He did everything for you.

"Hi, Rafey," You beamed. You smiled as Rafe stepped behind you and placed his hands on your belly, admiring how much you've grown. "It's funny to think how just a year ago I was the new girl on the island. And now we're about to be a family."

Rafe buried his face in your neck, inhaling your soft scent. "You're a dream come true." He whispered. He slowly removed one hand from your belly and reached into his back pocket. "Do you remember how I asked you to marry me in The Bahamas?"

"How could I forget being proposed to?" You giggled.

"Yeah, well, that's not how I planned to do it."

"Has anything we've ever done gone according to plan?" You chuckled.

"Nope. And I really haven't planned out the rest of our lives yet either."

"Planning isn't for everyone." You reassured him.

Rafe hesitated. He could give you the ring right now. He knew you'd be happy either way. But he paused and thought for a moment. "Are you free this Saturday, my love?"

"Hmmm, I'll have to check my schedule." You teased.

Rafe laughed and picked you up, carrying you to bed. He had ordered some Chinese food but by the time it got there, you were already out. He took out his phone and texted Courtney, Topper, and Kelce.

This Saturday, at the club. Plan a party. I'm going to really propose to her. On the beach. Please help me set it up.

Rafe waited a few minutes before he heard his phone buzz.

We got you.

-

Rafe had been so weird this week. But not in a bad way. Just very excited about Saturday and you couldn't figure out why.

Rafe was out and Courtney had come over, insisting on helping you get ready. They weren't very good at hiding things. Rafe obviously had a surprise date planned but you played along.

"I think this is the one!" Courtney squealed as she pulled out a deep navy blue, silk dress from your closet. It was a maxi dress that would definitely be blowing in the breeze. A low cut front and long lacey sleeves.

"I'm not sure Wolfie will fit in that." You teased.

"Oh sure he will! Come on!"

You let Courtney work her magic of getting you into the dress and doing your make up. This must be some date Rafe had planned. However, you were happy and excited to see what he had in store for you.

Courtney put the finishing touches on your outfit, including a small tiara that she laced through your hair. "Is all this really necessary?" You asked.

"Yes! You look beautiful!" She said. Her phone chimed and she quickly rushed to check it. "Your ride is here!"

She handed you your bag to match your dress and walked you downstairs. You continued to act oblivious, knowing that one of the guys were here to pick you up and take you to your special date. Once you stepped outside, you did your routine of locking the door and setting the alarm. Courtney walked you to the end of your driveway and you faltered when you took in the site before you.

A horse-drawn carriage sat in the street in front of your house and your fiance stepped out to greet you. "Care for a ride down the beach?" Rafe asked.

You were in awe at the gesture. His slicked back hair and dark navy suit had your knees weak. Courtney handed you off to Rafe and kissed your cheek. "I'll see you later! You two kids have fun!" She said before running off.

Rafe helped you into the carriage and you sat, speechless.

"Rafe..." You began. "Rafe what are we doing?"

Rafe wrapped an arm around you. "Oh, you know, just going on a casual date." He teased.

You didn't question it. You snuggled up to Rafe as the horses made their way to the beach. You listened to the waves crash against the shore and enjoyed the twinkling stars in the sky as you laid on Rafe's lap, enjoying the feeling of his palm against your belly.

Eventually, the horses stopped and you sat up. "Will you join me on the beach for a second?" Rafe asked. You agreed and let him help you out of the carriage. He held you close as you walked down the sand, standing slightly in the water as the waves washed over your feet.

"This is beautiful, Rafe." You told him. "Thank you."

"The night's far from over, my darling." He told you.

You turned to look at him, the moonlight illuminating his features perfectly and you could swear you were melting on the spot at the sight of him, ready for the ocean to take you away.

"I asked you to be my wife on a whim. I truly meant it. I did. But it wasn't what I planned." Rafe began.

You smiled but remained quiet.

"Before I met you, Y/n, I was falling apart. I-I didn't care about anything anymore. Then you came into my life and turned my world upside down. I've never met someone so...insane." He chuckled. "In a good way."

You frowned for a moment, looking back on all the pain you've caused.

"You're the only person I've ever felt true love for. You and our son," He said, placing his hand on your belly once again. "I want to give you the world and so much more."

You smiled up at him, enjoying the breeze in your hair and appreciating the way it messed up his. Rafe reached into his back pocket and slowly got down on one knee.

"I know I already asked..." He began. You took a step back. "But I wanted to do it right. You are God herself, Y/n. I can't live without you. I need you like I need air to breathe. I'm so grateful you chose me and I just want you to know...I'll always choose you. Will you marry me?"

He opened a small black box, revealing a huge diamond. You fought for air for a moment as you took in the sight of it. How did that thing even fit in that tiny box?

"R-Rafe..." You were at a loss for words. "Rafe...what?!"

"Please? Please marry me. I've never been so sure of anything in my life."

You stood speechless for yet another second. "Rafe, yes! Of course I'll marry you!"

The shine of his smile could be seen from outer space. He took your left hand and placed the rock on your finger. You'd never seen such a beautiful piece of jewelry.

"Rafe, you didn't have to-"

"Shut up," He said, standing up and pressing his lips firmly against yours. You kissed him back deeply. You had never been so happy in your life. You could even feel little Wolfie kicking.

You were over the moon about the little family you were creating. Nothing could take this from you.

"Come on, I have one more surprise." Rafe said, leading you back to the carriage and helping you inside. You weren't sure how this night could get more perfect.

You were all over Rafe as the horses took you to your next destination. When you pulled up to the club, you assumed you were about to sit down for a nice dinner. But as you stepped out of the carriage, the sound of cheering patrons led you to believe it was something much bigger.

Rafe helped you out of the carriage and held your left hand up. "She said yes!" He screamed and the whole crowd cheered.

Before you knew it, Courtney was running to you, wrapping you up in a bear hug. "You're getting married, bitch!" She squealed. She was in an entirely new outfit than she was from helping you get ready. You knew she had helped plan this. So did Kelce and Topper by the way they weren't surprised in the slightest, greeting you with warm hugs and praise.

You all walked into the club with smiles on your faces. You clung to Rafe's arm happily knowing that all the people here were supporting the two of you.

"Let me see the ring!" A swarm of women come up to you. You happily showed off the giant rock on your finger.

"Congratulations, you two." Ward said as him and Rose approached you. Rose gave you a hug, Wheezie soon following her as Ward patted Rafe on the back. "Y/n, there's someone here to see you." Ward said, motioning in the direction behind you.

You turned around and your jaw dropped. "D-Dad?"

"Hey, Sunflower," Your dad said softly.

You couldn't help the tears running down your face as you embraced your father in a hug. You hadn't seen him in months and here he was, standing in front of you.

"I can't believe you're here!" You said happily.

"Let's sit, for a second." Your dad said, helping you to an empty table nearby while other guests mingled amongst themselves. You sat back and relaxed, taking a deep breath as you rested your hands on your belly. You realized you hadn't had a moment to breathe in a while. "Look at you," Your dad started.

"Look at me!" You joked.

"A lot happened while I was away."

"Yeah," You sighed. "How do you feel?"

"About you and Rafe? About...this?" He asked, gesturing to your swollen belly. "It's every father's dream and nightmare." He chuckled. "But seeing you this happy...clean and happy. It's great. I see you've been taken care of and that's all I could ever want."

"Thanks, dad." You smiled. "So how was-"

"Rafe Cameron!" You were quickly cut off by Shoupe's voice as he entered the club with two other cops. "You're under arrest for the murder of Sheriff Peterkin!"

Let me know if you'd like to be tagged! :)

@outerbankspov @torturedtypewritersdept

[woozisguitar]

4:57am

warnings: mentions of anxiety, panic attacks and overthinking

word count: 853 (lowercase intended)

you sit in the stiff chair of your dining table, your laptop screen providing a soft glow in the otherwise dark room. the soft hum of the refrigerator and the shallow pants of your breath are the only noises in the dead of night. your otherwise loud neighborhood is relatively quiet today. you take in another deep breath, trying to calm your fast racing heart and even out your breathing. you know this is a tell of an impending anxiety attack, having had your fair share of those, but you don't even know what triggered this one. one minute you were quietly scrolling past the exciting lives of your friends on your phone, and the next you were in front of your computer for the past three hours, desperately trying to make some sense of your life.

“sweetheart, what are you doing?” a soft, sleepy voice rasps out from your bedroom door, causing you to look up from your computer.

a soft, tired jihoon stands in front of you, rubbing his eyes heavy with sleep. his hair is a mess, sticking out in all directions, and he opted to wear a soft sweater pajama set instead of his usual shorts. a small part of your heart seems to calm down at the sight in front of you.

jihoon walks over to where you are sitting and pulls a chair next to you. he peeks into your computer and sees various tabs open from post-grad programs of different universities, and he instantly knows what is happening. he then notices the soft tremor in your hands, your shallow breath, and the frantic, alert look in your tired eyes. he knows all too well what this means. he has witnessed a fair share of your panic attacks to know all the tells and signs like the back of his hand. he places his hands on yours, and you look up to meet his eyes. his eyes are so full of love and comfort, and for a second you forget about everything bad in your life.

“baby, what are you doing at this hour?” he tries again to coax you out of your bubble of panic. you sigh and look down at your intertwined hands.

“i'm just- i don't know, jihoon. i was watching all these people i know doing something with their lives, and i don't even know what to do anymore. i don't know what i'm doing with my life, and this is all so scary. i'm just-” you look up at him with tear-filled eyes. “what if i'm destined to fail in the end? what's the point of any of this then? it's been months since i graduated, with first honors too, but i just don't know what to do anymore. i feel so lost and useless and-” jihoon feels your anxiety increase, and as your breathing speeds up, he pulls you to his chest, softly cradling the back of your head as you quietly cry. he knows what you feel. you never talk about it, but all these feelings have been playing in your mind for a while now, and he knows exactly what you need to hear.

“you're not a disappointment, my love. you'll never be a disappointment to me. ever. and it's okay to not have things figured out right now. you have a plan, yeah? you have multiple plans, and right now you know it's not worth being anxious over it. trust me, my love, we just have to wait it out. i know you're not used to being so free, but maybe it was about time you took a break. everyone you know never worked so consistently for the past few years, whereas you didn't even take a break. i know it's hard, it's very, very hard, but you need to slow down and take a break. you've done so much already, you just have to wait it out now. we will apply to post-grad programs together like i promised, but we have to wait till they open up. there's no point being anxious before that.” jihoon feels your breathing slow down and slowly return to its normal rate at his words.

damn jihoon and his way with words.

you slowly lift your head up to look at him, and he wipes the tears from your face. he cups your cheek and kisses your forehead, a small promise that he's here and that he's not going anywhere.

“i'm sorry i woke you up,” you sniffle.

“never apologize, my love. i'm always here for you. now let's go to bed, hmm?” he says, closing your laptop and helping you out of your chair.

“jihoon, can you please sing for me?” you say softly after settling in your bed, your head on his chest and his arms secured around you.

“of course, my love. anything for you.”

and with that, you slowly drift off to sleep to the sound of your lover humming you to sleep. the world may be a hard and difficult place to deal with, but you know at the end of the day, you'll always have jihoon.

a/n: sorry its 5 am and i cant sleep

[heart-of-the-morningstar]

Corruption fic - Second Preview

Next preview is here! This is for all the night owls like me! I won't put a warning for this one either but there is one sentence that's very risqu��!

You started to bawl as you clung to Lucifer for support. Immediately, he rushed you over to the couch and sat you down next to him, letting you cry into the crook of his neck.

"Hey, hey, shh," Lucifer soothed. "It's alright. Alastor won't bother you anymore, I'll make sure of it."

"It's n-not him," you sniffled, "it's everything! Al-stor's right, there's no savin' me."

Lucifer pulled you away from him, placing a hand under your chin as he looked into your glassy eyes. "Now what makes you say that?"

Another tear rolled down your face. "Is like he said, what I was taught up there…nothing's true! Welllll, except…" you placed your hand over the one holding your face tenderly. "Theeeyyyyy did say that you, Luciferrrr, were heaven's prettiest angel. They def-liny didn't lie about that!"

You noticed a small blush creep across Lucifer's face at your words. He pulled his and away from your face to clear his throat, glancing away from you. "T-Thank you. That's umm, very kind of you."

You chuckled to yourself, scootching your body closer him. "Do you mind if I *hic*, lay down, jus' for a sec. Gettin' sleepy.

"Yeah, of course!" Lucifer smiled, but only for a moment. "W-Wait, hold on!"

But by the time he tried to warn you, your head had already fallen into his lap. You smiled up at the flustered man and chuckled, the heat returning to your face once more. "You got soft legs, hehe!"

Lucifer inhaled sharply. "Husk was right, you really are drunk. Wouldn't you feel more comfortable laying your head on a pillow?"

"Nnnnope!" you replied.

"Alright then," the king breathed and massaged the back of his neck, doing his best to hide how tense he'd become from your sudden closeness.

"H-Hey," you called up to him, "why'd youuu…why'd you protect me jus' now? From Al-stor. You *hic* didn't have to…"

He looked down at you softly, brushing away the hair that had fallen into your face. "I don't like bullies. You didn't deserve that, and Alastor knows that for his sake that he shouldn't get on my bad side."

"Never seen you so mad." you mumbled.

"I'm sorry you had to see that," he apologized, continuing to play with you hair. "I don't like bringing out that side of me. But Alastor really likes to push his luck for some bizarre reason."

"Awww," you pouted, "is too bad. I liked seeing that side of ya. It was HOT!"

Lucifer stopped his movements completely. “I-I’m sorry?”

“You heard me,” you responded poking at his chest. “What? Did ya think jus’ cuz I was a believer when I was alive that I’d be SCARED of ya? Maybe at first. Not anymore! I’m already in Hell soooo there’s no point in hidin’ it, is there?”

“Hiding what, exactly?” Lucifer gulped as if he was almost too afraid to ask.

You giggles and hid your face with your hands. “Noooo, you’re jus’ gonna laugh at meeee!”

Lucifer let out an amused hum. He gently took ahold of your wrists and lowered your hands away from your now completely beet-colored face. “I promise I won’t laugh at you, my dear. You’ve very much piqued my curiosity! And I’m very good at keeping secrets, you know! So please, let me keep yours.” He let go of your wrists, letting your hands fall onto your chest. You watched as he leaned closer to you, his half lidded eyes piercing your very soul. “Won’t you tell me, my sweet angel?”

"I…*hic* I umm…" you babbled. It was clear that you were struggling to answer.

"Mind if I take a guess?" Lucifer offered as he went back to playing with your loose locks of hair. "Is it possible that you have a little crush on-"

"I WAN' YOU TO FUCK ME STUPID TILL I CAN'T 'MEMBER MY NAME!" you blurted out without any reservations.

"-me…" Lucifer froze at your confession. You could hear the sound of a pin drop with the deafening silence that now filled the air. With a big inhale, he straightened his back fully, placing both of his hands under you in a flash, not daring to look down at you. "Well, I-I think it's about time we got you to bed!" he nearly shouted as he scooped you up in his arms and stood up faster than normal.

You let out a small squeak of surprise with his sudden motion. With a snap of his fingers, a portal appeared next to you and he quickly carried you across the threshold and into your dimly lit room. With a flick of his wrist, your bedsheets were undone and Lucifer was able to lay you down gently onto your mattress. He reached over you to grab your undone comforter and pulled it on top of you, covering everything but your head.

"Okay! Uhh, s-sleep well!" Lucifer went to run through the portal, but not before you were able to grab his sleeve.

"D-Did I upset you?" you asked nearly on the verge of tears again? Lucifer still hadn't looked at you.

"N-No! No, angel, you didn't upset me!" he tried to sooth you, but you weren't buying it. You couldn't stop more tears running down your face. When Lucifer heard your quiet cries, he finally turned towards you in a state of sheer panic. "Ahh, no!" He kneeled down next to you, wiping your tears away with his free hand. "Please don't cry! I promise I'm not upset!"

"Knew it was stupid…," you sobbed, "shouldn't have told you…"

"Don't say that," the fallen angel cooed. "Okay, okay, look…If uhh, we're admitting things right now, I might as well too. Would that make you feel better?"

You sniffled a bit. "M-Maybe…"

Lucifer shut his eyes and let out a deep sigh. "I've had…similar feelings…about you, that is. So…no more tears, okay?"

You stared at the man before you, completely and utterly baffled by what you had just heard. "R-Really?"

"Yes," he whispered. "But we can talk about this tomorrow, yeah? You need some sleep, it looks like you're about to pass out."

He was right. Your eyelids felt as though they could give out at any moment, and the warmth from your blanket wasn't helping you stay conscious either. As Lucifer stood up, you still clung to his sleeve like your life depended on it. "Stay?" you almost begged.

He smiled weakly, taking your hand from his sleeve and placing a small peck on the back of it. "Not tonight," he responded. "Sleep now, darling. I'll see you when you wake." You couldn't find the strength to respond, letting yourself drift off to sleep as Lucifer left you to dream.

Little did you know that he had disappeared to take a very cold shower.