#I'm probs gonna delete this
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You go to the racecourse and you see this, wyd?
Ft @littlepuppysj
#This is why I'm not allowed outside the house#frev#Is this technically?? Cosplay or reenactment? You tell me.#saint just#robespierre#Idk man prob gonna delete later#Pigeon irl
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gonna be more sporadic in posting from here on out, folks
#personal#blog stuff#we are taking some self-studies this year#so that's gonna gonna be fun for our terrible time management#on our way to get the worst burnout ever but#anyhow#yea a lot going on this year#i'm gonna try to figure out the doodle posting schedule#we're gonna aim for every week but it might be every other#we'll see#will prob delete this later#oh yea and fun fact our computer is being odd so we might have to find a new doodle app#anyways#(also on our way to get bullied possibly but that's just the way the cookie crumbles ig)
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Wait what do you mean I don't have to be nice to people I hate what do you mean people should get to want to know me have you met me? No I'm only good to compliment other people until they think I'm bearable company
❤️😢🥲💀
#im probs gonna delete this tmmw#what do you mean people should like me even if I'm not a people pleaser#irl drama#tech weeks making me feel like shit#the cast and crew are about to tear each other apart#also I feel like people treat me worse for being in the crew like… girl#I'm psychotic but that's okay
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the average wlw experience is never knowing if shit is platonic or not
#i am still screaming abt this. like i am on my period. i have to kick and complain abt things#like damn i really thought this woman was interested in me FUCKING DUMB FUCKING DUMB SJFUIFFKFJFKRKFJRIF#i am repeating she likeS A BOY IM NOT A BOY bc it's a bop. but also bc it lets all the shit out#frustrating shit#i guess i am into emotionally unavailable women#i'm prob deleting this one it's just too much lol#like i am so stupid i give up on reading people like. i cant read anyone for shit.#i def dont know how attraction works anymore like. absolutely forgotten#I AM ANGRY AT MYSELF SO ANGRY AT MYSELF IF YOU HAVENT NOTICED#god writing a fic tomorrow is gonna be so cathartic pls#boludeces y reclamos mios(?
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insane brain telling me to turn one of my oldest wip fics into an ask blog instead vs i dont wanna draw
#shut up luci#delete later#by one of my oldest i mean its a premise i've been playing with since middle school.#it is veryyyyyyy loosely a shimotsuma monogatari au for my bbygrls alice and sakura. loosely.#at this point the only real resemblance is the punk x lolita combo. entirely different plot and such#i've rewritten it so many times and even considered filing off the serial number to make it into an original story instead of fic#a couple scenes from my stageplay began their life as being part of this fic before i realized it matched my ocs better than iggypan#i havent touched this story in a while but i'm rereading some of it and i thought hm this would be a cute askblog premise also#however i dont feel like drawing all that but now im tormented with all the cute snippets i could show into their lives and the story#it might help me get the ball rolling on rewriting and polishing up to eventually publish#not to get anyones hopes up im prob gonna still take another decade on this fic#inb4 u can run an askblog without art. yeah i know that but art is my fave component of an askblog#inb4 no one sends asks anymore. i dont care i already know what asks i want to send to myself. but i would like to receive some others also
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was talking with a friend about it earlier, but man. i really haven't felt good about my writing as of late. i want to believe it's just writer's block fucking with me, but it's been just. extremely difficult to get words down that i think are any good. and then that bums me out even more and makes it even harder to write and. aghhhhh.
#marine blogs#will prob delete later but.#point is this is where i'm at atm and why i'm really struggling to get new fic stuff out.#my friend was like 'i hope it passes. i know how important this is to you.' and i wanted to weep about that a little gonna be real
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I alr kinda knew a Massive part of my family is lgbtphobic but it just pisses me off to know how easily they're willing to admit it to my face when I'm like . so visibly queer 💀💀💀 they KNOW I'm queer . like.....?
#kiln talks#non horror / slasher#personal posting lately which I'll probs delete later I'm just annoyed bc my sister refuses to fully side w me#like she knows my family targets me when it comes to that n she claims she loves me but the first thing she'll fucking do is#try and explain to me that that's just how their generation was raaaised n that they're fine with me blah blah blah#like yea I know I'm not stupid. do u believe them? do u think I deserve to live? do u think I should change? do u thunk.#whatever I'm gonna go eat bread
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i am filled with rage
#was gonna go to the beach tomorrow#but now i'm NOT#and i wasted so much time today getting ready#i'll get over it in a few hours so it's not a big deal really#but MAN#i wanted to go beach#i'll prob delete this later lol anway#rambles
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How many blogs do u have?
3
jeweled-blue-eyes: main blog
jeweled-green-eyes: art side blog (it's starting to collect cobwebs!)
sharper-than-a-serpents-tooth: sorta back up blog for wmmap related stuff in case this one gets deleted
#third blog is prob gonna get forgotten#I'm incapable of posting on multiple blogs#but a perfect summer storms self deletation made me fucking paranoid#better safe than sorry#answered asks#anon
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Taylor I downloaded Little Red Book and made an account for you 🤣🤣🤣
#rwrb rambles#taylor zakhar perez#alex claremont diaz#I'm never gonna use it myself#probs gonna deleted after he goes back to the states
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Sorry I'm aliveeeee. I spent too much time thinking and not enough drawing :')
#Today I wrote a concerning fic about Englsnd being in love with himself in science class#according to my friends the fic is '😟'#which to me that means it's really good :)#but I need it to be an 'are you ok? 😰'#We were lesrning about asexual reproduction. Guess what the fic I wrote was inspired by.........#Dw he just splits like a bacteria#Actually he just throws himself through a mirror#It did have a pretty sad ending though I didn't write it yet. Probs gonna be like 10 chapters long#and I'm deleting my fic on ao3 and reuploading when I make proper art about it. The way I uploaded it was a mess....#I'm also thinking those FrUK fics from a certain ao3 author and AAAA I love their work I want to draw fanart#There's too many things I want to draw#it's too overwhelming#rambles
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For some reason I feel like I don't belong in art spaces because I feel so untalented compared to everyone else. People will post beautiful art, while I'm just over here making a mundane art piece again.
#i know I'm good at art#but sometimes I look at other people's art compared to mine and think “Who would want to enjoy mine when everyone else is so much better?”#idk dude#vent#?#i guess#prob gonna delete later
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i gotta start making a portfolio of all of my protest/event posters bc shit's getting truly prolific at this point
#i'm gonna cry i need to step away from the computer for one fucking second i swear to god lmao#but fr i think the first one i did was 2 years ago and not counting like weekly news leaflets i def have at least 10 under my belt#and prob more#idk i can't remember -- i have them all saved tho cause i delete nothing eeehhhiii
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Gonna be honest, chat. I've been having the weirdest....idk, it's not exactly a mental breakdown? But Something is Happening, for like a month now. Do not know how to actually tell anyone this, so I'm just posting it on Tumblr I guess
#felix speaks#if you know me and you ask me about it there's like a 50/50 chance I'll panic and pretend nothing is happening#so idk man...this isn't even a cry for help I'm only in distress about it like half the time#idk how to talk about anythingggggg#I'm gonna be okay just....yea#will probs delete this later tho I might forget to do that idk#we shall see
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trying to calm down before telling my brother to please do the bare minimum and clean the toilet after he leaves it shit stained, but also fucking losing over the fact that i have to tell a 35 year old to not leave a toilet shit stained as if he was a fucking child
#and i can fucking assure you he's gonna be all ok 🙄 when i tell him#i'm not your fucking mother!!!!!! fuck!!!!!! act like the fucking adult you are for fucks sake!!!!!#i'm just sick and tired and shouldn't have to be dealing with this shit#and he's having people over on friday again like bare minimum you can do is clean the fucking bathroom your guests are gonna use#prob will delete this but i'm so tired#b.txt
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terrifying sound of the day: printer struggling to print a document and making long wheezing and groaning noises before abruptly falling silent with a shivering buzz as it slowly spits out the paper without another word
#personal#random#i thought it died for a second but the screen was still projecting a dim dying blue#anyways i'm gonna think about this for a little while uhh#i don't wanna use the other printer cuz it's too quiet#but i also can't stand the sound of a dying machine clinging onto the last of its reserves#anyways uhhh#will prob delete this later
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