#I'm not doing good and the magGOTS AREN'T HELPING
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Every now and then I find white worms crawling on my walls. It started like a month ago. The first was on the wall above the headboard of my bed, the second was just outside my room by the doorframe, the third was on my room's ceiling, and the last, one as of now, was exactly where I found the first.
I found one like, once a week, always in or near my bedroom, and I'm starting to think of it as a personal attack from a higher entity. I don't mind bugs, I'm not afraid of insects, earthworms, or spiders. I actually find them neat, I like 'em. But caterpillars and larvae terrify me for some reason.
I don't know why they're here all of a sudden. It's never happen before. I have no idea where they're coming from, why now, why in my room??
At this point, I'm getting paranoid again, and I think it's the Corruption. I've always had a problem with excessive skin picking, my floor is often full of my hair that I keep pulling out, and only one or two months ago did I start showering more than once every week (thanks to my stupid fucked up brain (meaning the metal sickness)).
In conclusion, I started wriggling in the grip of the Corruption and now it's sending its ugly fucking babys after me. So that's great (not really).
#sorry for the vent#kinda#I'm not doing good and the magGOTS AREN'T HELPING#the corruption#the corruption tma#This isn't really tma related though..#Whatever. it's my statement#the magnus archives#tma#i don't care
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sleeping w/ the mercs [IT IS LIKE THAT]
these are so badddddd bro literally ignore this i just need practice and the mercs are my victims pinky promise i'll get better
yeah the title is the exact same as the tf2 headcanons from my main SO WHAT
if ur under 18 please don't interact 👍🏻
afab reader i’m sorry guys :( gender is totally neutral though
obviously this is under a cut
warnings/includes: MENTIONS OF SYRINGES/NEEDLES, SCALPELS, AND MEDICAL STUFF IN MEDIC'S SECTION!!!!!! AND KNIVES AND BLOOD IN SNIPER'S!!!! these are so bad, pyro is insane, medic is also insane, sniper is depraved, actually everybody's depraved, i'm depraved and also so so sorry
mostly what they're into/how they behave, nothing super reader specific in these ones
Scout:
-he’s got enough experience but he isn’t as good as he says he is, he’s got the spirit though and that’s what matters
-really good with his fingers but he can't find the clit half the time so help him out a bit
-absolutely an ass man but isn’t into anal
-scout usually likes positions where he can easily see/touch your ass (doggy, reverse cowgirl, etc)
-definitely says cringe shit in the bedroom, 100% refers to himself as daddy (which is canon i think?? i remember him having a voice line where he does that, could be wrong tho)
-has tried (and failed) to call you kitten on the regular but reverted back to the usual (still cringy) nicknames he calls you after demo made fun of him
-he never shuts up so the dirty talk is CRAZYYYY
-calls you stuff like doll, baby, babe, and uses pretty girl/boy/baby and babygirl/boy/doll when he's close
-even though he’s a little clumsy with it, he really does like giving oral, just give him a little direction; BUT likes receiving oral even more, sorry abt ur knees babe 💔
-definitely into semi-public sex, he won’t do anything in front of people but you bet your ass he’s finding some alleyway or storage closet to get freaky in
-does get jealous pretty easy and even though he’s usually not too rough with you he is not above manhandling when he sees fit
-the dog tags stay on, do with that what you will
Soldier:
-good GAWD
-literally so mean but mean in a hot way so that makes it okay
-absolutely nickname crazy; most of them aren't very cute or sexy (i.e. cadet, maggot, etc) but cupcake always makes an appearance
-very much into verbal degradation because of course he is, is also very into manhandling and just kinda tossing you around but he doesn't wanna hurt you too bad
-rarely ever fucks on an actual bed, usually it's the nearest wall/table/chair/couch, any surface you could lay/sit on really
-no the helmet is not coming off but that adds to it
-the honey IS going on though, maybe not his full body but it will make an appearance (he’s def into foodplay)
-tiny bit of a size kink, i think soldier is one of the taller, bulkier mercs so there's a very good chance he's much bigger than you in one way or another
-would absolutely be interested in a threesome with demo let's get real here
-very attracted to body hair bc i say so
-likes positions where he's very obviously the one in control/with the power; very into restraint either with some device (handcuffs, rope, etc) or with his own hands
-VERY loud, so good luck with that lmao
Pyro:
-man,,,,
-obviously into temperature and wax play
-the mask and suit do not come off, but pyro has a plethora of toys to use on you instead 😊
-gets off on the idea that he's some faceless person you can't really understand that has complete control over you and your body
-does occasionally lift the mask up just above his nostrils to kiss you, though, scarred lips be damned
-does babble a lot, even though it's all muffled; the nicknames he uses are surprisingly cute, he'll call you stuff like sugarplum, marshmallow, firefly, sugar cube, and other sickly-sweet names
-doesn't like showing you his bare skin/body because of their burn scars, but pyro does enjoy grinding if you wanna help him out that bad
-derives most of his pleasure from making you feel good, though, so he isn't really looking for any type of physical release on his end
-pyro's are kinda short i just can't think of any more rn i apologize 💔
Demo:
-WHAT A MAN 😍😍😍
-#1 lover out of all the mercs get fucked spy
-i think his build is very similar to soldiers, maybe an inch or two taller, so he definitely has the same lowkey size kink
-is also open to a threesome with soldier
-absolutely a service dom but he teases so much
-FAKE SYMPATHY!!!! FAKE SYMPATHY!!!!!!!
-likes when you call him by his name more than any of the cheesy titles dudes usually want their significant other to call them but he is always referring to you by any nickname he can think of; the most popular ones are lamb, sweetheart, lass/lad, my girl/boy/baby and "poor, sweet thing"
-loves talking to you and making you talk back to him even when you're literally on a different planet; makes you tell him what you want him to do even though he knows exactly what you're gonna say
-also slightly into dumbification (not to the extent medic or engineer are, though, he just thinks it's hot)
-very much into face and thigh riding
-foreplay alone could last as long as an hour if he's feeling "mean" at that particular time
-THIGH MAN!!!!!! LET'S GO!!!!!!!!!!
-makes you hold eye contact with him, sometimes the eyepatch comes off 🥴
-likes giving a whole lot more than receiving but he isn't about to turn down a blowjob if you offer
-waking you up with oral, it's his version of breakfast in bed
Heavy:
-and you thought demo was a service dom 🙄
-literally will do whatever you ask him to he does not care, as long as you feel good he's content
-very obvious size kink and it's very easy to exploit, but heavy doesn't take too kindly to teasing (he isn't about to stop you, though)
-speaks mostly in russian so unless you're fluent you can't really understand him but you get the gist of what he's saying by the tone in his voice
-outside of whatever russian bullshit he's spouting out, he calls you his "leetle bunny"
-tries to be gentle with you because of how big he is, but if he's provoked he can and will get wild
-as stated above, he can and will get wild, which includes his dirty talk; russian praise will turn into demeaning english muttered in your ear
-BREEDING KINK !!!!!!!!!!
-doesn't tease you on purpose, but he goes slow enough to where you think he's fucking with you (no pun intended)
-begging is never necessary but it is a guilty pleasure of his
-doesn't ask to receive oral often but watching you struggle with it does kinda turn him on even more
-face sitting extraordinaire, yes he does make the stupid eating sounds like in the game and yes he does it on purpose to try to make you laugh
-LET HEAVY FUCK NASTY GOD DAMN IT!!!
Engineer:
-WHAT A MIGHTY GOOD MAN 😍😍😍
-much stronger than you'd think he is and he does use that to his advantage
-slight temperature play when the gunslinger is involved, it's just a little colder than room temperature but it's a very stark contrast
-loves conflicting his speech with his actions; he'll sweet talk and praise you while he's railing you into next week
-speaking of, he'll call you anything but your name. honeybee, honey, darlin', sweet girl/boy/baby, baby girl/boy/doll, any nickname that sounds hot in a southern accent he's callin you
-he absolutely has a daddy kink but won't tell you unless you have one too and approach him first, chances are you're younger than he is and he doesn't wanna make you think he's a weirdo
-all in all, the dirty talk is INSANEEEEEEEE
-absolutely into dumbification, he knows he's smart and he gets off on the power imbalance when you're babbling about nothing and he's still perfectly present
-also slightly into dacryphilia? it's not attractive when you're crying from pain, sadness, frustration, etc but he likes making you feel so good you're overwhelmed and all you can do is cry for him
-might forget to take the helmet and goggles off, but if you want him to keep them on then by all means he will
-would absolutely abide by the cowboy hat rule (if you don't know what that is, basically if a cowboy puts his hat on your head y'all are fuckin' later on)
-very much into bigger people, the extra chub around the thighs, chest, cheek, and stomach areas are a weakness of his
MEDIC!
-the moment we've all been waiting for
-kinda like soldier in the fact that he's mean in a hot way, but it's less bully-mean and more absolutely deranged mean
-of course he's into degradation and medical play, definitely dacryphilia and dumbification (for similar reasons engineer is), another merc with a slight size kink cause medic is big as hell
-likes to get you on the operation table and trace a syringe or scalpel (or both if he's feeling patient [haha get it]) along your body purely for the fear it evokes from you
-wants to get you scared/vulnerable and that's how he starts his foreplay; totally into the whole predator/prey thing but not in the same way sniper is, medic is more into metaphorical or psychological hunting rather than the actual thing
-FAKE SYMPATHY!!!!!! FAKE SYMPATHY!!!!! FAKE SYMPATHY!!!
-teases, edges, and overstimulates you to the point of tears and gets this stupid smug look on his face while cooing at you
-calls you demeaning names, like pet, but he's got some cute ones he uses too; täubchen, maus, schatz, and liebling (dove, mouse, sweetheart, and darling) are very prevalent in and outside of the bedroom
-if you're okay with it, medic does like to use you as a bit of stress relief when everybody else is getting on his nerves
-is 100% down for a doctor/nurse or doctor/patient roleplay let's get real here
-also into semi-public sex, sometimes he'll leave the medbay door unlocked and slightly ajar purpose just to mess with you
-though he is very rough with you most of the time, he likes to save his more tender moments for when the two of you are in an actual bedroom and not his workspace
Sniper:
-wild. like genuinely doesn't know what to do with himself when he's horny he just goes fucking crazy.
-even though he gets crazy insane, he doesn’t really know what all to do and it frustrates him; he doesn't have much experience when it comes to sexual acts with another person involved so please give him some pointers
-absolutely into knife play come on
-if you have a period, he'd also be down for period sex he does not care about blood in the slightest
-isn't all that nickname-heavy like some of the other mercs here, but he does sprinkle them into his dirty talk. it's usually the same things he calls you outside of the bedroom, like 'roo, darl', and love
-into body worship, giving or receiving. he likes making you feel beautiful and he likes feeling good about himself too
-would definitely want you to suck him off while he does target practice and i know this is such a popular headcanon but come on guys
-another popular headcanon is sniper being into predator/prey dynamics which like,,,come on. it's literally perfect. you're telling me this nutcase dude wouldn't be into scaring the shit out of you by physically hunting you down. it's basically canon idc
-likes biting and leaving marks on your neck/shoulders in very visible areas because he's kind of a possessive guy ngl
-as much as he likes people seeing the aftermath of what he does to you, sniper is a very private person so he really wouldn't be all that into sneaky sex. the closest you'll get is his sniper nest while he does target practice on cease-fire days
Spy:
-despite being an asshole on the regular, he's a very attentive lover
-into body worship but only giving, he already knows he's fine and he wants to make sure you're never insecure about yourself
-bilingual babe 😍 speaks in french so much you can't really understand what he's talking about but he's more than happy to give you a translation
-also has a daddy kink let's get real here
-KNIFE PLAY!!!!!!!!!!
-heavily into power play as well, similar to pyro because he'll keep his clothes (including the mask and gloves) on while you're completely bare to him
-likes buying you lingerie
-likes getting and giving head the same amount, he has no real preference cause it's gonna end in sex every time anyway 🤷♀️
-french nicknames ONLY!!!! mon cher (my dear), ma chérie/mon chéri (my darling), amour/mon amour (love/my love), gentille fille/garçon/bébé (sweet girl/boy/baby), mon ange (my angel) [currently using my basic understanding of the french language for evil]
-semi-public and public sex spy does not give a fuck he has a cloaking device for a reason 🙄🙄
-if you don't already have one he will give you an accent kink
#i'm so SORRYYYYY#tf2 fans please don't beat me over the head#i just need practice </3#yeah i included some salt n peppa references too i couldn't help myself#tf2 headcanons#tf2 x reader#tf2 smut#scout x reader#soldier x reader#pyro x reader#demoman x reader#heavy x reader#engineer x reader#medic x reader#sniper x reader#spy x reader#smut headcanons#god i am so sorry
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[Dead and Unburied]
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Simon 'Ghost' Riley x F!Reader
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Warnings: MDNI, Zombie!Ghost, Gore, Violence, Reader is a bit messed up, Angst, Hurt mostly without Comfort
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Summary: Ghost is dead but you just can't let go.
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You feel disgusting... Sick in the head some might say.
Your hands shake as you stare down at the rusted chains, wrapped around the man's ankles and wrists... Could you even call him a man anymore?
×🩷×
"Damn it. Get the fuck out of here- now."
A large chunk taken out of his arm, the stench of rotten flesh and the burn of fresh blood infects your senses, it's enough to choke you... You're no stranger to infected, you know how this all goes. You've watched it over and over...
You can't lose him too. He's all that's left in this shattered world. What's the point if you're completely alone?
"Live for me. Survive this."
It's a command and a plea all at once, pleading with you to go on in hopes of a better future... Maybe you're weak though. Too weak.
×🩷×
You know this is all wrong- nothing about this is logical. You can't help but imagine what the others would say if they could see you now.
"Ya gotta let him go."
"This ain't right. That isn't him anymore, lass."
"It's okay, Strawberry... Just breathe."
Price, Soap and Gaz... Their voices haunt you as well as the screams of so many others, you don't even know if they are out there somewhere or not.
Suddenly the sound of low gurgling disrupts your train of though, glancing over to see Ghost shifting against his restraints, clouded dead eyes meeting yours... Those beautiful eyes you used to get lost in now make a shiver run down your spine.
But it's still technically him, isn't it? It's still him. You have to believe that.
"Simon... It's okay. It's me."
His broken jaw shifts slightly and you'd like to imagine he'd be speaking right now if he was capable... However, something shocks you down to your core. There's a hint of recognition in him- like he has some form of humanity left, a shred of awareness of his past. Awareness of you.
You could just be imagining it though... After all, you were crazy enough to capture him to keep even though he's a zombie now. Just to chase off the loneliness.
×🩷×
Seeing him like that- walking the streets in aimless search of flesh... It broke you in a way you didn't know possible. Yet a part of you just needed him. Needed him back. Even if he can't speak to you any longer or can't recognize you as friend not food- you needed him.
You managed to sneak up on the giant of a man with a crowbar in hand, smacking him with it earning a low growling groan, part of you feels guilty as you restrain him... Especially guilty as it sounds as though he still experiences pain, his jaw dislodged from the harsh blow.
"Sorry, sorry, sorry... I'm so sorry."
×🩷×
Despite your better judgement you move a bit closer to him, he doesn't attempt to attack you which you take as a good sign, raising your hand to cautiously touch his cheek- feeling the cold flesh beneath your fingertips.
"You're still in there, aren't you...? Si... Please tell me you're still in there somehow."
You receive a grunt in reply- though much more hoarse and growly, it's still recognizable as Simon. An actual reply to you...
"Oh my god... You're still-"
Before you can continue cup his face lovingly in your hands, a maggot wiggles out and lands on your knuckle, you immediately scramble away and frantically shake the bits of rotten flesh and the hideous little critter off.
"Ew!!! Ew, ew, ew..."
Simon leans forward to watch what you're doing, he seems a bit apologetic for what just happened... This definitely can't be easy for him, having some form of consciousness trapped inside this zombified shell, rotting away while still walking... Does he still feel pain from it? Is he numb to the sensation of his flesh wasting away? Is he in mental and physical distress right now and can't tell you?
Part of you feels guilty now. Perhaps you should have killed him for his sake- you're being selfish.
"M'sorry, Si... I'm so sorry... I just... I need you."
×🩷×
"Shoot them in the head."
He knew he had to look out for you no matter what, he refused to let anything touch you. You're the one pure thing that found its way into his heart and life, saw past the Ghost and saw Simon. You'd listen to his puns for way too long at a time, never seeming to get sick of him.
The thought of anything happening to you made him sick inside, his guts twisting into multiple knots. He's known loss his whole life- even before the apocalypse... Now it's him and you against the world it appears.
"Stay behind me."
Putting himself in harm's way for you came so easily, however regret seeps into his bones when he's unable to shield you from his own demise, seeing that look in your eyes when you acknowledge he got bit. The pain in his arm couldn't possibly compare to the heartbreaking terror reflected in your gaze.
His final moments spent knowing he can't protect you anymore. There's nothing that can be done- only hoping you'll listen and carry on.
×🩷×
The sound of other voices scare you senseless, scrambling up off the safe house floor and grabbing your crowbar, all out of ammo at this point so your gun is useless. Simon growling lowly and wriggling against his restraints but you just shush him.
"Sh... Shhh... I've got this. You don't have to protect me, it's okay."
Your reassurance makes him settle slightly but he's still rightfully worried... Until you recognize one of the voices.
"Someone's definitely in here..."
His voice is low and smooth... Gaz. You're not alone. They're alive. They came back for you- they...
"Bloody hell!!!"
The door was pushed open to reveal a stunned Soap at the sight of a restrained zombie Ghost.
"I- I can explain..."
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#mdni#zombie!ghost#simon 'ghost' riley#simon ghost riley x f!reader#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley x you#simon riley x reader#simon riley x f!reader#simon riley x you#simon riley angst#ghost x reader#ghost x f!reader#ghost x you#ghost angst#vee's cod fics
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Jut found out that the full Touchstarved game might not be out till 2025 so here's a scenario I imagined with Ais. Has the others interact with mc too, but Ais is the main love interest. Hope this doesn't feel too much like my oc. I chose the Unnamed route so that may be brought up.
Worth The Trouble ( Ais x GN Reader )
( Content Warning: Violence, Blood, cursing, Ais being Ais, Remember what he did to that guy in the demo )
MC = Y/N ( I'm too tired from finals to type the slash, sorry 😭)
It started off as a normal day in Eridia, or at least as peaceful as things could be in the hellscape of a city. MC went to the market for some light grocery shopping, their small tote bag half full, when a group of kids zoomed past them. For a flash they could see that the kids' arms were full of produce, a few stray fruits leaving a trail in their wake. It was mere seconds before an enraged yell from a man was heard.
" Get back here you little shits!!!" the a man, a local produce seller, barreled down in the kid's direction. Nearly knocking down passersby, MC included.
One of the smaller kids tripped, dropping all of their stolen goods. They called to their friends for help but it was too late. The seller had already grabbed them by the collar like a stray puppy.
" Stupid maggot! I'll show you what happens to thieves around here!!" He pulled back his meaty fist to strike them.
Without thinking, MC ran to grab his wrist before the blow landed.
" Hey! That's going way too far."
The seller looked down at them and snarled.
" Stay out of this! This is between me and this little thief here."
" I get that but look at them." MC pointed to the kid's dirty clothes that were holding on by threads. " Clearly they aren't stealing for the fun of it. Can't you let them go?"
The seller scoffed at them, foul breath fanning their face. Thankfully they held back their disgust.
" I'm not running a charity. If the kid wants to eat the kid's gotta pay."
MC thought for a moment as they stared at the child, who was still curled in a protective ball. Although their face was covered, it was clear by their trembling that they were crying. MC immediately remembered all the times they'd been hungry and in need after they fled the temple. While they survived they couldn't imagine doing so at this child's age. How long had they been suffering?
" I'll do it."
" Do what?"
" Pay." MC reached into their cloak and pulled out their coin purse. " I've got plenty to spare." which wasn't true but they'd manage. The seller gave them a long, calculated glare before sighing.
" Fine."
He put the kid down. They gave a quick glance to the seller then the MC before grabbing their haul and scurrying off to where the rest of the group went. MC wasn't expecting a thank you, but the last look the kid gave to them over their shoulder was enough.
" Ok," MC counted the coins in their palm, leaving the purse nearly empty. " Will this be enough?"
The seller took the coins. Counting each while scratching his stubbly chin.
" Yeah, almost..."
MC looked at him confused. They were sure that they gave him much more than his nearly, spoiled produce was worth. They almost didn't notice his arm go up. But they did feel the strike across their face. Everything went white for a moment as they stumbled. Pain flared over the entirety of the right side of MC's face. They pressed their palm to it and whipped their gaze back to the seller stunned.
" What the fuck is your problem??!!" they shrieked at him.
" Don't look so confused. You said you'd pay for everything. That includes punishment. " He let out a dark chuckle and walked pass them. " Maybe think twice next time you wanna be someone's savior."
MC gawked at his back. What kind of asshole pulls a stunt like that. He got his money fair and square. Clearly he just wanted a reason to cause someone harm. They wanted to let it go and move on but crap that hit really hurt. His hands were big enough to crush their skull and they were pretty sure that his ring cut their cheek. There was no way they were gonna let him walk away so easily.
" Hey!"
The seller turned around and was met with a fist right to the nose. He reeled back, giving MC enough time to land a kick to his kneecap. He fell to the city floor with the gracefulness of an old dying ox, MC's coins going down with him. They grabbed a handful of them before making a break for it back to the Wet Wick.
Out of breath, energy, half their coins and what little faith they had in humanity, all MC wanted to do was go to sleep in their room and maybe have some of their scraps for dinner. It could've been made into a full meal but they hadn't realized they'd dropped their tote bag until it was too late. Thankfully, the bar sounded empty from the outside, so at least they could avoid the headache of possibly socializing.
" Hey sparrow."
Shit.
There right in his usual spot at the bar sat Ais, accompanied by Vere and Leander.
" Hey Ais..." they said weakly, pulling up their hood even more to hide the blooming bruises.
" Um Excuse me. I'm here too dear. Goodness has being here already dulled your manners?" came Vere, tail playfully swaying.
" Hey Vere." they said quickly as they tried to flee to their room, but that would've been to easy.
" Oh MC how was the market did you get anything good?" Leander asked, conveniently getting in front of them and blocking their path. They didn't look up at him and did their best not to adjust their hood again.
" Yeah, yeah it was good."
" But where's your tote ba-"
" It's getting late I'll see you guys later." MC swerved around him, nearly home free.
" Sparrow."
They stopped. Ais' piercing gaze burning into their back.
" Come here, please." he instructed in a soft yet stern tone. They couldn't resist him. He'd only pry more if they did, so reluctantly they sat next to him, avoiding eye contact.
" Take off your hood."
They stayed still. The air filled with a tense silence.
" Ais come one. They've probably had a long day. I'm sure their fi-" Lenader nearly choked when MC took their hood off. " What the hell happened?! Are you ok?!"
" Obviously not." Vere scoffed. " Thought I smelled blood but that's nothing new for you. Do tell, what mess have you found yourself in this time, MC?"
MC let out a tired sigh. Leander's worrying and Vere's teasing made for a sickening combo on an already shitty afternoon.
" It's nothing. I just ran into a bad guy at the market. Nothing interesting." They were about to get up to leave when Ais' hand was placed firmly on their shoulder.
" Humor us would ya? What really happened?" While the slight smile on his face was meant to be assuring, MC knew he was up to no good.
" Really it's nothing. I just saw some kids steal some food and one of them got caught by the seller. So I thought hey why not be nice and help this clearly starving child. But nope! As usual the situation blew up in my face. Apparently coins weren't enough payment for the guy so he- " They mimicked the back-handed slap motion they'd been a victim to. " The asshole didn't even have the decency to warn me first, so I thought it was only fair to get in a few blows in myself then run like hell before things got too heated. So yeah that's it. Nothing special."
After what they hadn't meant to be a ramble there was another thick silence. Crap maybe I said too much. Then a low chuckle came from beside them. Oh good Ais found the story amusing, maybe they were worried for nothing. But that was quickly put aside when they turned to look at him.
His grin was downright dangerous. Fangs gleaming and all. His eyes were even worse, glowing with a bloodlust that would scare a soulless shitless.
" I'll be right back." he said, getting up from his seat and stretching out his tired joints with a pop.
" Ais." Leander warned. " Let's think about this, ok buddy."
" Nothing to think about. Now," He stood in front of MC and leaned down to their level. " Which seller was it?"
MC felt their pulse quicken. Not just from being at eye level with Ais, but also from the immense violent aura he began to exude.
" Really Ais it's fine. I hit him pretty hard so we're even."
" I'm sure you did. But this is purely for my own selfish vices. I can't rest easy knowing this jackass is going around threatening kids and hitting customers. So who was it?"
" Ais. It's not worth the trouble just let it g-"
Ais' hand swiftly taken ahold of their chin. With a gentleness that greatly contrasted his character, he tilted MC's face to better examine the damage. They couldn't help the heat that rose within them.
" Plenty worth the trouble to me." He tilted their head back to face forward. " Who was it, MC."
Maybe it was the softness of his tone or the way he said their name instead of Sparrow, but they confessed. Even down to what stalls the seller's had been next to. He gave them a small, genuine smile and went on the hunt.
" Well, there's no stopping him now. Let's get some ice on that bruise, hm." Leander went around the counter, paying no mind to MC's breathless expression. In no time he came back with clean rag and another with ice inside. " Alright let me see."
Before he could attend to their face, Vere cut in.
" Leander, didn't the doctor leave some magic elixir or whatever for minor injuries in the backroom?"
" Oh you're right. He did. I should go get it."
" Yes you should." Vere smiled sweetly then frowned once Leander was out of sight. " Good I couldn't tolerate him for much longer without Ais here."
" Don't get too excited, he'll be back soon." MC reminded him.
" No he won't," Vere swiped the rag that Leander left on the counter near the ice bag before turning back to them with a mischievous smirk. " I poured those nasty medicine bottles out weeks ago."
MC gawked at him.
" Why would you do that? What if someone needed those?"
" What like you? Don't be such a baby you'll be fine. Now hold still. I can only take so much of you blood smelling up the place."
With a similar gentleness as Ais, Vere took hold of their chin and began to dab the blood away from the cut that was already beginning to close. MC didn't have the energy for anymore shock today, so they relished in the care.
" You know. This pacifist act you're playing won't do you any good in this city"
MC sighed and grabbed the ice bag to put on their bruise once he was done with the cut.
" I'm not a pacifist. Trust me I've got nothing against that jerk getting what he deserves. I just don't want Ais to get in any trouble because of me."
" Hmph, now why would Ais get in trouble?"
" Because, he's a monster. What if the Senobium punishes him for being too violent?"
Vere hummed to himself. He carelessly tossed the bloody rag on the floor and leaned back against the counter, tail swishing languidly.
" Oh don't fret dear. The Senobium's too up their own asses to care about a few lowtown brutes getting torn apart. Besides I highly doubt Ais would do anything so dreadful as to get a punishment like mine. And if he did..." Vere's eyes turned a bright pink, his fangs seemed longer as well. " I'd tear this city to the ground before they laid a finger on him."
MC just stared at him for a while. The primordial fear in their gut was unmistakable, but they couldn't help but feel a bit relieved.
" Well I'm glad Ais has a friend like you to look after him."
The fox scoffed.
" I'm not his friend."
A bit confused by that response, they were sure he was joking. The duo seemed as close as Mhin and Kuras if not more.
" Ok then I'm glad you're his very close, foxy furry acquaintance."
Vere's ears went down as he scowled at them.
" I can break you like a twig. Don't forget that."
They merely chuckled at that although they weren't entirely sure if he was serious or not.
" Sorry for the wait!" Came Leander's chipper voice. He rejoined the two with a small container of bandaids and a bottle of unknown liquid. " Took me forever to find this elixir. I could've swore we had more bottles. Thankfully, I always stash a spare."
" Wow how great is that Vere." MC gave him an innocent smile that in turn got them glare. Vere definitely meant that threat now.
----
Ais arrived back at the bar late into the night. He wreaked of blood despite his best efforts to clean himself. He didn't want to make another bad impression on his new...new friend? Acquaintance? Whatever they were he wanted them around him more often. Which would be hard if they were scared of him. Did he scare them before when asking about the seller? They seemed nervous, but most people were around him, especially after knowing about his brutal tendencies.
Perhaps they didn't mind. He got a good look at the seller's broken nose, and what he could assume was an injured knee that made it all the easier to catch and corner him. The sparrow really did have a tough side after all. He was almost sad that he sullied their work with his own. No one would suspect that what was left of the asshole was the handiwork of two pissed off individuals. Maybe returning their tote bag full of goods and the coins that he'd swiped from the guy's pockets would be a good enough apology gift.
The barkeep was cleaning shot glasses when he arrived. Out of no where a wave of unease hit him. Maybe he came back too late and should just leave their stuff here.
" Got something for MC. Can you give it to them for me?"
The barkeep only spared him a quick glance.
" Do I look like a delivery boy? Drop it off at their door yourself, I'm busy." She replied with a bitterness that he always found amusing.
" Yes ma'am."
He was in front of their door when the doubt came back, sweaty palms too. What the hell was he nervous for? He doesn't get nervous. This was just a small favor for a frien-aquaintance. Just put the stuff down and go. But what if someone took it? Maybe he should see if they're awake first. Maybe not what if he wakes them up.
Annoyed by his rambling thoughts he did least smart thing and opened, which should've been locked, door. It was dark inside, aside the moonlight from a small window. His higher than average vision could make out a small bed with a lump under the covers. Next to it was a dresser. He made his way to it quietly, mentally cursing the metal on his boots for the creaks they made in the floorboards.
Finally at his destination, he set the tote bag and coins on the dresser and turned to leave. But curiosity got the best of him. He snuck a peak at MC and it was all over. The covers were up to their nose. There was a small bandage on their cheek. The bruising seemed to have healed a bit. Ais had never seen them look so peaceful. It was actually pretty cute. Then he realized how creepy this whole situation was and made his way to the door.
" Ais...?"
Shit!
He stopped mid step, looking over his shoulder at them. Their eyes were barely open and their voice was quiet and soft.
" That you?"
He sighed.
" Yeah it's me sparrow. Don't worry just wanted to return your bag. I'm leaving, go back to sleep." he kept walking.
" Are you ok?"
He stopped again, wide eyed.
" What?" he asked.
They yawned.
" I smell blood."
Oh, he thought. They were worried about him? That's actually really sweet. When was the last time anyone got worried for him? Vere and Kuras maybe. But they knew he could handle himself. It's what's he's good at. Looking out for himself when no one will. When everyone else leaves eventually.
But maybe MC wanted to stick around.
He smiled, unsure if they could see his face so he made sure they could hear it in his voice.
" I'm just fine sparrow. It's not my blood you're smelling."
They smiled back before yawning again.
" Good. Well see ya later I guess..."
They curled back into their blanket and pillow, already drifting. He took in the sight one last time before leaving and closing the door.
" Yeah see ya later."
The barkeep and every wander through the night had no idea why the feared demon renegade, Ais, had the softest smile on his face all the way back to the wastelands.
#touchstarved game#touchstarvedgame#ais touchstarved#ais#ais x reader#touchstarved ais x reader#red spring studios#vere#leander#touchstarved#breaking news local eridia demon bad boy who claims to have no friends gets giddy over having a new friend#him and vere need to stop tripping they like each other 🙄#vere low key liking mc mostly because ais likes them#leander liking mc cuz he's a lonely big tiddy loser who gets jealous of ais and honestly I like that about him#its so funny haw vere can't stand him#also he totally knew that vere poured out the medicine 😂#god I love it when when bad boy character types softly pine for their love interests🥺💕#autocorrect keeps mispelling all their names except for leander😤
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going crazy (forgive the ugly-ass colors, I had to try and find good color coding for 14 people, and still have it have enough contrast against the background to be readable). for the record I had to transcribe these lyrics myself in Google docs offline mode using the downloaded file I had of the song. with no wifi, so no spell check or googling lyrics I wasn't sure about. which was hell on my audio processing disorder brain
anyways I am very far from done and I want to try and get each soulmate pair in at least once, so far as you can see we've got scar & Grian, Martyn & kind of Cleo but not as a pair yet, Pearl & Scott (and kind of Cleo), and then impulse (and bdubs but that line isn't in this screenshot)
anyways if anyone has suggestions for all the remaining people. hmu in reblogs (please). also these aren't all the lyrics to the song ofc, i'll put them under cut with my notes (this song is just very double life to me so i'm hoping some day I'll be able to animate it):
Separate faces help him to walk and cross the tiles As he justifies existence with flinches and false smiles
^ something something maybe Grian and scar? unsure
And the hand he used to feed his hunger shriveled from the cold He's borrowed more than he can pay, his debts are getting old
The cracks had always been on show,
^ referencing martyn's lore?
the spirit always broke The bottle always emptied well before the candles smoked Tobacco always there on cue in someone else's glass
Someone else's secrets become someone else's path [past?]
^ martyn's lore? w/ grian
I know you well, I know you felt Like it should've been someone else who fell But I'll never forget your face You melt into my life [light?]
I want the attention that she's getting From your loving arms
^ Pearl, Scott, Cleo
You let me soak your face into my memory Like you want me, and you kept me Wanting more as I don't know you I don't own you, I just sew you Into pieces of this fabric that I wear over my shoulder
Like a dream, you fill me up
And make me cold, just like a soldier Trains her mind to do the killing Even though he isn't willing I have pain, and I am cold Without your heat to make me bold
^ pearl and scott
Just forget that we're not molded We're just solitary soldiers
^ Grian and scar?
Given [giving?] up on all this love stuff It's made up and we're just older I give up on you, we're over [I gave up when you were over?]
I want reciprocal lovers I want trust, and I want safety
^ pearl
I want space, and I need chasing
^ impulse if you know his character and see DL!impdubs in the toxic way. please. someone see it
I want to feel that I'm the only girl Around you who can know you
But I want to see you luring Other women who can't own you I want to see their faces When you make them lose their graces
When you make them feel they're placeless
^ pearl
Like a chain around an object that keeps moving You're a concept of a man and of an object
You are everything I wanted All I seem to crave Like a hero needs to save
Except when I get up close There is a maggot on the rose
^ again. impdubs. they're picture perfect until they're not
Like a magpie stealing shiny things There's [they're?] sometimes diamonds, sometimes tin
You are my darkness, and you understand I don't want anything but your hand Just hold [pull?] me steady, hold me steady (hold the frame) And I'll shoot again, now
I can't stop thinking about you
And if you're stripping me down to My brittle bones and crumbled joints These open wounds just need some salt, oh
^ impulse and bdubs (I am big on clockduo/impdubs DL toxicity ok)
It would be better if you left If I can't see you, I can't step Into the light you've cast about you I can't have you, but I want you
This obsession is not letting me slide I feel I'm damaging myself to stay alive I am destroying all I have to let this burn This little flame is not so dangerous on its own
#enen says stuff#double life smp#double life#traffic smp#life smp#dlsmp#pearlescentmoon#smajor1995#martyn inthelittlewood#zombiecleo#impulsesv#bdoubleo100#joel smallishbeans#ethoslab#goodtimeswithscar#grian#bigbst4tz#rendog#tangotek#solidaritygaming
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General LU Headcanons part 1
Heya! So I'm starting this blog with some general headcanons about the boys, I think I'll divide it in three parts so it's not too long. First up are Four, Hyrule, and Legend! Hope you enjoy :D
Part 2 Part 3
Four
It takes him so long to emerge from sleep
Like he'll be in a haze for like 20 minutes, not able to form any coherent thoughts
Which is kind of a surprise because he's one of the early risers, and is super reactive once fully awake
He tends to talk to himself a lot, mostly when he does something or thinks through a problem
It's mostly to exteriorize all the noise inside his head tho
The others aren't as weirded out by it than he feared, and he's thankful for it
Whenever they're in a market or just in a town, he always finds himself drawn to craftsmanship
Like if they need to interrogate people about monsters and stuff, he'll go ask artisans mostly
He feels more comfortable around them
It feels like home
Also he likes to compare his work to other blacksmith's
He feels like he has a lot to learn still, and he's very curious about how the craft has evolved with time
He doesn't know first aid and the scent of blood makes him sick, but if his teammates need tending he'll do his best
He tries to see their wounds as metal work needing repairs
It helps him keep his cool
But he'd rather leave it to someone else
Hyrule
Another early riser, but he hates it
He loves sleeping in and wishes his body would let him sometimes
But oh well, when it's time to wake up it's time to wake up
He's a very light sleeper too, like the wind blowing in the leaves above would wake him up
He hates it
Botany nerd
Loves keeping track of the new plants he finds along the way
He always asks the Link from the Hyrule they're in if he knows about it, and will pick them up if he can't get an answer, to study them later hopefully
He rarely can, but when they have a moment he'll either find a plant book (and a Link who can read it for him) or straight up ask someone if they know about the plant
He's always so polite and genuinely curious, people can't help but answer
He accidentally set Sky's stuff on fire once when showing off his fire magic to Wind
Sky was too impressed to truly be mad at him tho
(Also Hyrule replaced all of the stuff that couldn't be repaired, don't ask him how)
He doesn't mind blood and grime and gore, but can't handle anything with maggots in it
He'll stitch up anything, he'll put bones back in place if necessary, but one bug? In a wound? Don't count on him
He can keep his calm even before the grossest injuries, which is why he's often fixing up the others after a fight
He rarely uses his healing magic tho, he knows he'll tire too easily, and he can't help them if he can barely stay awake
So potions potions potions
He's a gentle caregiver but you better do as he says when you're hurt
Legend
A heavy sleeper, and he dreams a lot, but he never remember them
Probably for the best if you ask him
He usually wakes late, but never truly rested unfortunately
That never stoped him from being immediately efficient and fully awake tho
He knows he has a reputation of being sharp and closed off, but he's a really good listener
He's the kind of person curse the world with you when you vent until you're in the right headspace to find a solution
He kind of encourages the others in their dumbest ideas just to see what'll happen
(not the too dangerous ones, of course)
But he's curious, and after all the adventures he's been through, he believes that if he survived all of this, surely Wild will survive trying to cook a bomb flower
He did, but Twilight almost died of stress
He's the one who helps Warrior with refilling their inventory when they're low on supplies
He's a great negotiator and can get them twice the supplies for the same price
He's sometimes even charming enough to get them all a free meal
It's his favorite skill
He doesn't mind blood but will not look at broken limbs
Not his own, not other's
He tries to keep his cool around the others to not make them panic, but he really hates broken bones
If one of them is hurt, he'll try to distract them and make sure they have water and enough heat
He'll also keep them in place if they move around too much for Hyrule or Warrior to work on them
He's not gentle, but he's still reassuring somehow
#linked universe#linked universe headcanons#lu headcanons#lu writing#lu four#lu hyrule#lu legend#i hope its good#im gonna write the rest of them now wish me luck lol
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EVIL DEAD RISE (2023) SENTENCE STARTERS
❛ You looked like you were gonna shit a brick out sideways. ❜
❛ It wouldn't have been a clean decapitation with these blades. You'd just scramble your face up real good. ❜
❛ I gave her Klonopin so she can sleep off whatever the fuck is wrong with her. ❜
❛ Who's the brainless meat puppet now? ❜
❛ We're watching all the Freddy movies in a row. Even the shitty ones. So, you, um, wanna come over and… ❜
❛ You look like mom. ❜
❛ You know, the downstairs buzzer is totally busted. I was able to walk in right off the street. ❜
❛ Ghosts aren't real. ❜
❛ I only believe what I can see. ❜
❛ Hey, be nice or you don't get a gift. ❜
❛ Why didn't you tell me? I would've jumped right on a plane to help you work through this. ❜
❛ I called you. Twice. ❜
❛ I don't blame you. I hate the sound of my voice too. ❜
❛ I screwed up again, like I always do. And I need you to help me figure it out. Again. ❜
❛ I think I peed my pants. ❜
❛ You never take the elevator after a quake. ❜
❛ Oh, honey. I love you guys so much more than pizza. ❜
❛ You think it might be worth something? ❜
❛ I don't think Mom wants cash from something you stole. ❜
❛ Weird shit like this gets locked away for a reason. Just leave it. ❜
❛ I don't like this. You need to put it back right now. ❜
❛ I would like to present what I believe to be one of the three fabled volumes of Naturum Demento, The Book of the Dead. ❜
❛ Destroy it! It's called The Book of the Dead for a reason! ❜
❛ Its pages contain ancient rituals and incantations, the recitation of which proclaim to allow contact with supernatural forces that exist beyond the thin veneer of our known world. ❜
❛ It's okay. It's just a blackout. ❜
❛ It was a perfect day and all I could think about was how much I wanted to cut you all open and climb inside your bodies so that we could stay one happy family. ❜
❛ It's in me. ❜
❛ Don't let it take my babies. ❜
❛ One minute she was fine and the next she was talking crazy and...and now she's gone. ❜
❛ May I pray? ❜
❛ There's an old fire-escape ladder on the north side of the building. I could try to get down that, raise the alarm, get some help in here.❜
❛ You got the tools? We could just cut right through the door. ❜
❛ You ain't gettin' through those old doors without something heavy-duty. ❜
❛ I'm gonna get my gun, and we're gonna blast it open. ❜
❛ I don't like being trapped. ❜
❛ Everyone is on edge enough without a gun getting fired in here. ❜
❛ I don't know what to do. You're the one who always has the answers. ❜
❛ No matter how busy you ever got, you always found time for me. For everyone. ❜
❛ You have to help me. You have to. I'm burning. I'm burning alive! ❜
❛ Mommy's with the maggots now. ❜
❛ What's happening to me? ❜
❛ I'm free now. Free from all you titty-sucking parasites. ❜
❛ Let me kiss it better. ❜
❛ Who wants to rot next? ❜
❛ Get away from the door. ❜
❛ Please, we need help! Let me in! ❜
❛ You never should've stolen it. ❜
❛ This isn't my fault. ❜
❛This is your fault! ❜
❛ You don't turn on each other. Ever. ❜
❛ [name]'s right. This is all my fault. ❜
❛ Oh, there you are. Hey there, cutie-pie. ❜
❛ Open up and let us in. We can be a big, happy family again. ❜
❛ You don't look so good. ❜
❛ Nothing a big old hug and kiss from you won't fix. ❜
❛ Open the door like you open your legs, you stinking groupie slut! ❜
❛ What are you looking at, hon? ❜
❛ I gotta kill the creepy-crawlies that I got inside my tummy. ❜
❛ Is this a nightmare? ❜
❛ Is what happened to [name] gonna happen to us? ❜
❛ You'd be a good mom/dad someday. You know how to lie to kids. ❜
❛ I thought I should tie her up. Just in case. ❜
❛ Yeah, well, maybe there's words on there that can help stop all of this. ❜
❛ My want to understand and commune with the other side could not have been more misguided. ❜
❛ This evil is not governed by the rules of man. No, it takes its pleasure in creating terror through total chaos. ❜
❛ [name]'s kitty hides up there sometimes. ❜
❛ Told you, you should've put the book back. ❜
❛ I can hear them outside the doors now, begging for me. It is only a matter of time before I am taken too. ❜
❛ Nothing can stop this demonic force. Even its final remnants will come after you. ❜
❛ You must run. All you can do is run! ❜
❛ This horror will not stop until innocence is destroyed. ❜
❛ I will swallow your soul. ❜
❛ [name] waits in hell for you and your unborn bastard baby. ❜
❛ Are you gonna be a mom? ❜
❛ I'm getting us out of here. ❜
❛ You have no idea what it's like to bring a child into this world. ❜
❛ Everybody here dies by dawn. Dead by dawn! ❜
❛ Am I dead? ❜
❛ Come get some. ❜
❛ You know, you really do look like Mom. And you're gonna fail miserably just like her. ❜
#rp meme#sentence starter meme#sentence meme#rp sentence meme#roleplay prompts#roleplay meme#horror rp meme#inbox memes#*mine#*movie
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The Times They Are a Changin' by Bandtrees and Hatsunoid is absolutely amazing
...And if you can handle the contents of it. No seriously. The fic is definitely dark and if you're sensitive to MEDICAL ABUSE, GORE, AND ABLEISM—Don't read it. It's especially centered around those and unless you close your eyes for all of it, you're not going to be able to handle it.
BUT!! It's so good, I would love to erase my memory just to experience reading it for the first time all over again. The disturbing parts aren't OOC (in my opinion at least) and it's very well-written, some optional out-of-site parts too.
A Laconic Summary: Mob loses control over his powers and causes permanent brain damage to Reigen and Ritsu. This fic explores the possible effects of that
Things of Note (as tags): Ambiguous Ending, Parasites (Specifically maggots and they're not TOO important, but they're there during a somewhat important moment)
Extremely long rambling (with spoilers) below the cut
This fic is so good, I created a sideblog for my AO3 to post about it. This fic is so good, that I had to stop what I was doing even though it is probably going to be detrimental to my grades. This fic is so good, that I was nearly about to rip my hair out from its roots
It's about 100k chapters long, separated into two parts. I'm easily bored and there's been plenty of times I've read a fic with maybe half the length, gotten bored, and thought of some parts as a slogfest even when it really wasn't—I just suck at getting through longfics. But reading through this, there was never a point where I thought that. Tensions were always high, rising even when I thought it wouldn't be able to, and I would end up near-screaming
And the way it shows how different characters feel? Gorgeous. Amazing. Love it.
Obviously, we have the normal book style descriptions from one character's POV, but then we have Teru's diary and Shou's little monologues(?), and it's all really cool??!?! Maybe that's what helped keep my attention. That and the little off-site links.
Speaking of those, I think I found all of them, but I'm not that observant so I could have easily missed some. And wow. Jesus christ. The last couple ones, the ones of Shou's gallery as his phone was getting wrecked, I was. just. In shock. I'm a very sentimental person who cares about photos and things, and I don't know how Shou didn't begin loudly crying right then and there because I would have
And god, so many times did I think 'Is this fic going to have untagged MCD?'. I was constantly at the edge of my seat expecting that someone would die. Reigen, Ritsu, Mob, Shou, Teru, Dimple (especially when he confronted Mob right as he was about to lobotomize Ritsu)... Basically all the main characters in the fic had moments where I was preparing to mourn
Mob really left for the deep end in this fic. I won't say that I fully get why he was so convinced that what he was doing was right, but it makes sense for him. He's not the type to let go easily, he's someone who draws strength from his bonds, and his aspect could be blood. And almost all his life, the message to never give up was basically struck into his head over and over. The one time I can recall where it wasn't? Claw, Seventh Division, where Reigen told him it's okay to run away. But I doubt that tilted the scale into being balanced in the slightest. There's so much more I could say about him in this fic. But I'll save it for now
Teru was... Teru. I understand him more than I did Mob, I think if I were in his situation, I would have maybe stopped at a certain point but we would be very similar in most of the actions we take. In the first chapter, I went 'haha silly!' at his entries. Seeing them as a little treat between the downers surrounding it. But then after he helped 'operate' (It doesn't feel right calling it that), I guess it really hit me. Then I started questioning if I would have done what he did. Then I realised I would have. Then I spiralled until I told myself this kind of situation will likely never happen to me and if it does, I'll get to it when I get to it
Serizawa is easily one of the ones you can feel for the most. Unlike Mob and Teru, he hadn't done anything to Reigen and Ritsu personally. And unlike Shou and Dimple, he didn't say harsh words. Perhaps you could blame him for not taking action sooner, but they all can be blamed for that.
Shou... Oh my god. Shou. At first, I was ready to fight Shou tooth and nail because really? That one comment on FriendBook wasn't necessary. I don't know how or why Mob didn't block him. But then as Mob spiralled further and further, I was hoping for him to make his way back into the narrative to save Reigen and Ritsu. Then he did. And he failed and he was injured and I thought he was going to die. Then he didn't. And it's implied he could have helped them. But could he have also made it worse? Who knows, that's why I put Ambiguous Ending as a thing of note.
DON'T FORGET THE OUT-OF-LINK STUFF!!! Mixed media fics that have off-site links are truly beautiful. My friend and I love that shit. Should she ever get into MP100, I'll recommend this fic to him with a shit-eating grin on my face. I hope the word count doesn't intimidate him erogdfkg... Every single bit of the off-site links I saw was just so cool. The art of Reigen made me feel strong unease, the real videos too, and that one animated video with Ritsu and Mob and Teru. Okay basically everything gave me a strong unease. But that's the point!!! And it was done well!!!!
This fic is pure talent, skill, and effort put into something that shouldn't just be preserved via a PDF file, but should be carved into stone for future archaeologists to discover. I wish I could hold even a fraction of power needed to create something this masterful
On a more less-serious note to finish this off: Mobway. Red Mobster. I was about to lose my shit. Every single time one of the companies showed up I was about to tear my hair out (in a funny way) because it felt like falling for a prank. I ESPECIALLY LOST MY SHIT AT PSYCHOLOGIST PEPPER BECAUSE IT TOOK ME SCROLLING DOWN BEFORE REALISING. Truly, the minds behind this were geniuses
Also, this might sound weird, but I got reminded of KomaedaLoveMail while reading this. The off-site links to websites for sure helped, but I guess I just associate talk of gore in written form in this way with KLM? Or maybe I haven't quite recovered from consuming that piece of media (Can you even call KLM that?) yet. This isn't bad by the way, I loved deepdiving into KLM even though my feeble brain couldn't comprehend shit.
And and one last note- Opening the song link in the end notes was like emotional whiplash. I had to sit there for a bit to process. Good music
This is a whole mess. Even for a ramble, it's a whole mess. I don't have words or sentences or even phrases for how I feel right now. I'm a mess
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Darling, I can't stand being away from you. The more you avoid me the more I'm going to try and chase after you. I cling to you like cobwebs, dusty and frail. I'm the mildew on rotting shower curtains, plastic falling apart. I'm a ghost stuck haunting the past, I will never, ever leave the gravesite where our collective memories died.
Stress and fear makes meat hard and chewy, not good, but it doesn't matter to me. What difference does it make to my rotten tastebuds? If I dream about the taste of love, maybe I'll somehow be able to perceive it. If I wish hard enough, maybe it will come back into existence; maybe, just maybe if I still blow on these old ashes, the fading glow will burn bright again and the fire we once shared will be rekindled.
I know it's there, it was there, it can't be gone yet. I love you, I love you so much, so much its maddening. You occupy my every waking thought, crept into every crack and crevice of my otherwise empty mind and made yourself at home. If my thoughts aren't for thinking about you what good is my putrid brain for?
You just want to discard me, a nasty treat molded over that you forgot about. I've been here, waiting, I can't help the maggots crawling all over. Please don't leave me, I'm so hungry and only you and your love could ever sate me, bloody or not. You are the sole thing that glows dimly in the dull void where my heart was, the only one who makes me feel again. I never forgot about you, please don't forget about me, I can't stand the thought of it. The phantoms of your kisses, your hands on my body, the barely audible things you whispered to me, all linger throughout this broken frame.
I'm never going to leave your side. I love you, and I know you did, too. You have to. I'll make you love me if I have to.
Darling, I'm already dead, and any hopes of saving me died years ago with me, its saccharine to see you try. Your patience is as thin as spider silk, strong enough to not flinch as I sink teeth in and rip out chunks of your flesh to replenish my own in desperation, but threatening to snap if I keep up these "antics" any longer.
You would hardly comprehend how my mind holds on to you, my life support before I'm dragged down into the soil again. What would my unlife be without you? I'd crumble like a decrepit suburban home, but not before dragging you to my side so we're killed in its collapse together. I don't care if I've already eaten off enough of you in my greed, it won't be enough until I die with you.
Let us return to an eternal rest, just the two of us and nobody more. Dark, deoxygenated blood staining our funeral/wedding best. There's nothing left for us here, why don't you see that? Those demons are just trying to drag you away to a different hell, why do you trust them more than me? Can't you see I've always been here for you, smiling even with pieces of you stuck between the teeth of my grin? It's like you just shoved me in a casket and moved on.
But so long as this withered body walks, and I have you in my sights, I won't let you get away so easy. If I have to eat you alive to make sure you'll never belong to anyone but me, I'll do so and sigh happily as you scream, bony fingers tearing your vocal cords into silence as I sweetly sip blood from your torn-open, snapped neck.
#suggestion#cannibalism#death#love#possessive#yandere#blood#gore#hunger#appetite#uhhhhhhhhhhhhh idk this one's kinda peculiar but i kinda like it. didnt do too much editing im. tired#neue post editor format whatever its called go eat shit and die challenge i HATE this garbage
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hiiiiiii there hi i'm so sorry for the disturbance, but i'm in the process of putting together a personal reference document on early ( to be precise, late pleistocene in europe ) humans, and their way of life, starting from the smallest domestic things to necessities for surviving their native climate - including the way they would prepare and utilize animal parts for clothing, bedding, shelter etc.
i need to disclaim that it's not some serious thing! it's not for academia or anything else, i am just-- god this is shameful --- putting together a tabletop campaign with a hilarious amount of research for an ice age setting that also incorporates magic and dinosaurs 😭
so, the specific reason i'm here ( and in a couple other inboxes, you might see me ) is because i am looking for resources on how one could prepare animal parts - skin, hair, bone, antlers - without relying on any modern tools, chemicals, etc.. and how such prepared products would differ from those you'd see today.
fun things i've been told so far, but which might not be accurate, is that large anthills could be used to clean bones over the span of a month or so ( paired with cooking the bones, but i'm not sure if that'd be before or after? ) and that the process of tanning in some cultures includes smearing the hide with a mixture of animal brain, liver and salt. if you live by the sea, very resourceful!
unfortunately i have basically zero practical experience with 'natural' tanning methods because i'll be honest, they're super hit and miss and most people these days who try them either quit or go to a synth tan because it's actually reliable.
that being said, the options you have are, generally: brain, egg, and leaf tanning (from what i understand.) the hides still need to be scraped out, usually on a rack with a knife or ulu-like tool to remove flesh, fat, and to thin the skin, and then painted with the fat or soaked in the tannins. then the hides will need to be broken as it dries and smoked - the smoke is actually one of the most important parts as this is what actually finalises the tanning process. it's difficult to keep the fire at a good temp for smoking and not burning and it takes several hours to do. if you don't smoke the hide it won't be waterproof and thus not useful for garments or furniture :)
i am assuming, at least, that these hides won't be as soft as a modern tan, but will be usable as evidenced by, uh, well, our ancestors using them for millennia haha.
what i do have more experience with "natural" methods is bone cleaning! i have tried the anthill method and personally it was better for cleaning off skulls that already are mostly clean, but it still wasn't that great imo. dermestids, as you've probably heard, are the best for the job but in the wild they aren't as reliably available and prefer dried-out/jerkeyed meat. so great in the desert, not so much if you're in the fantasy equivalent of the american pacific northwest :')
i use flies - just normal ass flies, since maggots like wet/rotting meat - and a combo of that + maceration (soaking the skulls in water so bacteria help eat the flesh) can get a skull clean in about a week if the weather is warm. this is, of course, the stinky way to do it, and there's usually some gross cleanup afterwards in the form of picking your bones/teeth out of the meat and hair soup, but the maceration water helps to degrease the skull as it rots. if you cook a skull it can damage the bone and make it brittle, as well as cook grease into the bone and make it really gross, stinky, and it will leach grease for eternity. if your characters have watertight containers that flies have access to and don't mind smelling rotting meat for a week, that's the way i would go.
hopefully that helped! and don't be ashamed of writing for ttrpgs, i spend every other saturday of my life playing dnd (now to be pathfinder as soon as the dm gets the system figured out) and yes, i have played a guy obsessed with bones (rip kip carrol you were my favourite). of course, he could magically clean bones, but y'know.
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In my memories, I was the cruelest, the toughest there ever was. People feared me, would sacrifice their own friends at the drop of a pin to stay on my good side. That's where I belong; at the top of the food chain, the apex predator. But now that you're here... I'm conflicted. Being beneath someone suddenly doesn't seem so bad as long as it's you..
- ❤️🩹
If that was where you belonged, you wouldn't have looked at my account and thought anything of it. But no, here you are, whimpering about how you're "so tough" as if you aren't in my asks for the same reason as all of the other worms. Don't worry, I see you as just as pathetic as all those you claim to be so "superior" over.
You're not special. You are completely worthless. Do you think your memories mean anything here? That because you remember being "on top", others should grovel? You're nothing anymore. You never will be.
But oh, I'd be happy to help you with those little delusions of yours, since you seem so desperate to be put back in your place. Why don't you admit to yourself that you're nothing but a weak maggot, just like the rest of them?
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actual umineko chapter 2 liveblog
last post was fanart. you clicked through to see it, right?
if beatrice wants me to believe she has magic she can't be saying "and then i summoned a goatman with a laser sword but kinzo's furniture pulled out HIS laser sword and killed the goatman and then i summoned the stake of lust and" ok beato sure
so what did happen to kanon and jessica? beato staked em both probably. or at least jessica, i'd like to see kanon's body before i call anything
i guess kinzo's fucked up Servant School that teaches them to be furniture is mimicking his idea of beatrice's familiars.
the chapel is a likely location for the gold at the moment? once again, battler didn't find any secrets but he's a dumbass. there's text on the chapel that they don't give us probably because it'd be too much of a hint? george says "i think it went 'm' 'b' 't' 'q'" and we get no info as to what that means. even if his last theory was "happy halloween maria" is referring to the virgin mary (lol) i'd like to know what he's referring to here
i finally got a proper "objection!" moment. the six dead parents *and rosa* met in the chapel at midnight but the text doesn't call attention to it. then the next day rosa is like "gee battler how'd beatrice get into the chapel without the key that you saw me taking from maria? it must've been magic"
battler gets his first proper objection moment right after me which is nice.
finally, red truth. the real umineko begins now
my theory for the kanon & jessica Locked Door is my theory for basically all the locked doors. the door is open, it is locked while open, Crimes happen, the key is placed inside the room, and then it is closed with beato outside the room. i wouldn't call this "locking it from the outside". this isn't possible with every kind of lock but they don't let us inspect the lock. the alternative is a servant's key being stolen and returned without noticing
battler is pretty foolish to be so certain that none of the 18 were involved in the murders. player-battler didn't see kanon and jessica's fight or the adults at the chapel, does he only see what piece-battler sees?
if battler was defeated and believed in beatrice but I, the player, didn't, would that still be game over? i'm seeing scenes he doesn't that are trying to convince me magic is real...
the pieces can't say "we saw (fake?) kanon use magic" in front of piece-battler but the instant he's not in the room they can. of course
piece-battler sees golden butterflies near the end of ch2 but it's after the witch has revived and by then the game is over, right? they really aren't suspicious of kinzo enough
shannon: "george would you still love me if i was a maggot"
WHODUNNIT SPECULATION ehh idk. i dont think kinzos died yet but i dont think he's directly responsible for any murders. his goal (revival of the witch) is furthered by the killings but it wouldn't be gambling if he did it himself. in a similar way maria thinks she benefits from the ritual but she has good alibis and her idea of beato wouldnt need much help from her genji may be doing Crimes for kinzo's sake without his knowledge. if there's multiple killers (and i think there is) he's the only one i think would be Willing to die in the ritual kanon is not on beato's side but if anyone is Interfering it's him i don't believe in a Servant Conspiracy, i don't see any motive for gohda, the doc, shannon or kumasawa yet of the family i don't suspect the kids or krauss+natsuhi. if eva and hideyoshi faked their deaths it was very impressive lol. rosa has the most to gain from the beato-ing, but if i take kanon's magic scenes as evidence he's against beatrice then i gotta assume rosa is against beatrice too even if she may be part of some crimes kyrie and rudolf have both been out-of-focus and (allegedly) die early
is people/the audience accepting magic a Goal in Itself for beato? it def makes her More Powerful in imaginationland. magic scenes could be lies, they could be maria's imagination, or even shannon/someone else's. it'd be really pissed if the truth is "it's not magic BUT multiple people hallucinated or went 'crazy' or whatever" i don't have any cosmological theories or commentary i don't really care how tea party land and the time loop work or fit together and relate to reality. it works because otherwise theres no story it's probably worth knowing what bernie and lambda Represent even if i don't consider them Real Characters. bernie maybe an anti-magic "fairplay whodunnit" perspective to oppose beato, but she is herself a witch. im sure she'll be clearer later she hasn't done much yet
beato is fantasy she's bullshitting she's a writer or gamemaster who doesn't trust the readers. she's playing chess but she controls how many pieces each side gets and what every piece does, but she still wants battler to say how much better and smarter she is. but ALSO she's maria's coping mechanism, so shes not meant to be purely a negative thing. opium of da masses. you could argue that beatrice is like the main thesis of umineko and you don't *really* need to speculate on anything other than her, but that'd be boring :P
i feel like my theories didn't develop/change much reading chapter 2 which is prob a failing on my part. ch3 is supposed to be The Fairest Game Yet so i'm looking forward to it
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I'm not hiding all that behind a readmore.
Taylor Hebert AKA Skitter Propaganda Post
Do you know what you have to do to hurt someone in a fight if your whole power is “controls bugs?” It’s never pleasant. And this is a girl with an almost pathological drive to fight people theoretically much stronger than her. Much maggots-in-eyes and spiders-on-dicks ensue. Committed to being a hero initially, ends up becoming warlord of a whole city while defending it from super-poweeed spree killers, monstrous kaiju, and timeline-severing mobsters. Saves humanity through mass mind-control.
Shes so fucking morally ambiguous I don't even know where to start. She wanted to be a hero and then over the course of 1.7 million words she tricked me into thinking she was rational and ethically sound when she cut out someone's eyes, held someone's dying son hostage in front of them as leverage (she was killing the son), put maggots in someone else's eyes to eat them slowly, shot a fucking toddler with no hesitation, and she's such an amazing unreliable narrator that you root for her. She's genuinely so good at convincing herself that she's morally sound that she convinces the reader of it as well most of the time, but despite the atrocities (and there's a fucking ton of atrocities) she's genuinely a girl who wants to do good and help the world. She fights serial killers, provides food and water and shelter for people who need it, gets her back broken trying to save people, and is generally willing to do whatever it takes to help no matter what that entails. She's a girlboss who is terrifying and determined enough to kill god, she's willing to do anything for the greater good, she has a fucking orphanage as the bottom floor of her supervillain lair. She's so so complicated and such a twist of good and brutality and I cannot stress enough how compelling and morally ambiguous and girlboss she is. I have never seen a character who fits the title "morally ambiguous girlboss" more in my entire life and frankly I doubt I will, no one does it like her.
she went from aspiring hero > supervillain > warlord (still a supervillain) > hero > mind-controlling every cape in the multiverse to kill god. and she did kill god. so. girlboss. but on her first night out she used her bugs to bite a man's dick off. that man? trying to kill kids. those kids? teenage supervillains. she initially joined their teen supervillain group to betray them to the heroes, then joins for real. their boss kidnapped a preteen girl and got said girl addicted to drugs. he used a heist taylor was in as a distraction to kidnap the girl. taylor becomes a warlord and does all sorts of awful things to the other gangs in the city (including putting maggots in a guys eyes, and carving another man's eyes out (bug dick guy) (everything grew back)). the reason she did this? so she could kill her boss and free the preteen girl. She's taken over the city at this point, she's a warlord running a supervillain gang. what's she doing with this power? improving the city's infrastructure. she runs her territory like a panopticon, if anybody who can work isn't working they get the bugs. she's also running an orphanage out of her home. she decides to step down as warlord and join the heroes. while she's in custody, what does she do? that's right. kill superman via dry land drowning in bugs. now she's a superhero. she does stakeouts and pursues gangs to force their younger/more sympathetic members into superheroism. why? to fight the end of the world. the end of the world comes, god is killing every earth in the multiverse and things aren't looking good. what does taylor do? she asks a bio-kinetic who got sent to supervillain alcatraz for sister rape to give her on-the-spot brain surgery. this brain surgery lets her control any person within like 18 feet of her. she uses a portal guy to manage to ensnare every cape in the multiverse and unite them in her fight against god. One cape has a stress induced aneurysm. how do they ultimately defeat god? she makes large-scale replicas of his dead wife everywhere, making him so sad he becomes killable. girlboss. (sorry this was so long! i started and then just kept going. worm is 1.68 million words long and a lot happens in it)
Holy Shit. Holy SHIT dude. She rotted a man's dick off with spider venom. and then she did it again (it grew back). and then she cut his eyes out. this is the first guy she meets. she mutilates *so many* people. one time she withheld a life-saving epinephrine shot from a dying man (he was allergic to bees. she controls bees.) as extortion material. she shoots a baby (it was a mercy). She cut a girl in half (which was actually pretty high up there on the "most heroic things she did" list). She was Seinfeldian rivals with the most dangerous serial killer in existence, until she trapped him in Hell Forever. He's like still there by the end of the second book. she kills God by bullying him to death. All* of this was probably the best thing she could have done in the situation. the tagline of the book is "doing the wrong things for the right reasons." The worst thing she ever really did was to pretend she was straight though.
Did she kill an orphan? Yes. Did she put maggots into a man’s eyes? Yes. Did she do all of this while having intense homoerotic tension? Yes, and that is why she is a girlboss. She also killed Jesus
Taylor Hebert AKA Skitter Propaganda Post
Do you know what you have to do to hurt someone in a fight if your whole power is “controls bugs?” It’s never pleasant. And this is a girl with an almost pathological drive to fight people theoretically much stronger than her. Much maggots-in-eyes and spiders-on-dicks ensue. Committed to being a hero initially, ends up becoming warlord of a whole city while defending it from super-poweeed spree killers, monstrous kaiju, and timeline-severing mobsters. Saves humanity through mass mind-control.
Shes so fucking morally ambiguous I don't even know where to start. She wanted to be a hero and then over the course of 1.7 million words she tricked me into thinking she was rational and ethically sound when she cut out someone's eyes, held someone's dying son hostage in front of them as leverage (she was killing the son), put maggots in someone else's eyes to eat them slowly, shot a fucking toddler with no hesitation, and she's such an amazing unreliable narrator that you root for her. She's genuinely so good at convincing herself that she's morally sound that she convinces the reader of it as well most of the time, but despite the atrocities (and there's a fucking ton of atrocities) she's genuinely a girl who wants to do good and help the world. She fights serial killers, provides food and water and shelter for people who need it, gets her back broken trying to save people, and is generally willing to do whatever it takes to help no matter what that entails. She's a girlboss who is terrifying and determined enough to kill god, she's willing to do anything for the greater good, she has a fucking orphanage as the bottom floor of her supervillain lair. She's so so complicated and such a twist of good and brutality and I cannot stress enough how compelling and morally ambiguous and girlboss she is. I have never seen a character who fits the title "morally ambiguous girlboss" more in my entire life and frankly I doubt I will, no one does it like her.
she went from aspiring hero > supervillain > warlord (still a supervillain) > hero > mind-controlling every cape in the multiverse to kill god. and she did kill god. so. girlboss. but on her first night out she used her bugs to bite a man's dick off. that man? trying to kill kids. those kids? teenage supervillains. she initially joined their teen supervillain group to betray them to the heroes, then joins for real. their boss kidnapped a preteen girl and got said girl addicted to drugs. he used a heist taylor was in as a distraction to kidnap the girl. taylor becomes a warlord and does all sorts of awful things to the other gangs in the city (including putting maggots in a guys eyes, and carving another man's eyes out (bug dick guy) (everything grew back)). the reason she did this? so she could kill her boss and free the preteen girl. She's taken over the city at this point, she's a warlord running a supervillain gang. what's she doing with this power? improving the city's infrastructure. she runs her territory like a panopticon, if anybody who can work isn't working they get the bugs. she's also running an orphanage out of her home. she decides to step down as warlord and join the heroes. while she's in custody, what does she do? that's right. kill superman via dry land drowning in bugs. now she's a superhero. she does stakeouts and pursues gangs to force their younger/more sympathetic members into superheroism. why? to fight the end of the world. the end of the world comes, god is killing every earth in the multiverse and things aren't looking good. what does taylor do? she asks a bio-kinetic who got sent to supervillain alcatraz for sister rape to give her on-the-spot brain surgery. this brain surgery lets her control any person within like 18 feet of her. she uses a portal guy to manage to ensnare every cape in the multiverse and unite them in her fight against god. One cape has a stress induced aneurysm. how do they ultimately defeat god? she makes large-scale replicas of his dead wife everywhere, making him so sad he becomes killable. girlboss. (sorry this was so long! i started and then just kept going. worm is 1.68 million words long and a lot happens in it)
Holy Shit. Holy SHIT dude. She rotted a man's dick off with spider venom. and then she did it again (it grew back). and then she cut his eyes out. this is the first guy she meets. she mutilates *so many* people. one time she withheld a life-saving epinephrine shot from a dying man (he was allergic to bees. she controls bees.) as extortion material. she shoots a baby (it was a mercy). She cut a girl in half (which was actually pretty high up there on the "most heroic things she did" list). She was Seinfeldian rivals with the most dangerous serial killer in existence, until she trapped him in Hell Forever. He's like still there by the end of the second book. she kills God by bullying him to death. All* of this was probably the best thing she could have done in the situation. the tagline of the book is "doing the wrong things for the right reasons." The worst thing she ever really did was to pretend she was straight though.
Did she kill an orphan? Yes. Did she put maggots into a man’s eyes? Yes. Did she do all of this while having intense homoerotic tension? Yes, and that is why she is a girlboss. She also killed Jesus
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Good News Everybody, It's Time For My Opinion!
ok so i finished reading the graphic novel of the visitor the other day and i have many, many more opinions about it than i did about the invasion, possibly bc i read the book first this time instead of afterwards--
ok so we Have To address the Sameface. every single child character has the same face. sometimes the adult women have it, too. in the invasion, where tobias was still human, i had trouble differentiating him and rachel because they both had long blond hair. in this one, i had trouble differentiating rachel vs. melissa vs. jordan. their faces look exactly the same because all the kids' faces look the same and they all make the exact same facial expressions and they all have more-or-less similar physical builds and yeah some of these blond kids have freckles or are slightly different shades of blond but he doesn't even do different eye colors. this is A Problem. and it's not entirely due to grine's ability, because other books of his feature more diversity in character designs -- but those books are a little more cartoony, and i think the realistic style they've chosen for this series does him no favors. it restricts the character design, it restricts the expressiveness of the humans and the animals, and it probably restricts other comics storytelling devices as well.
he's making a good go of it with the animals but speaking as a Cat Lady, i think he could have made rachel-as-fluffer more expressive, even while maintaining the more realistic style. people who aren't Cat People in general don't understand how expressive cats can be, i think -- there's this public perception that they're aloof and flat and it's so far from the truth. (i also feel like you can see him getting better at drawing cats as the book goes on lol whoops)
grine is, however, doing a great job with the body horror of morphing. every book talks about how gross it is, but these graphic novels are the first time i've really felt that come through.
i don't remember if either the invasion or the visitor are outliers in terms of the action vs. thinky balance, or again if i just didn't notice bc of my reading order with the invasion, but the visitor in prose spends a lot of time with rachel just in her head, thinking and observing and having feelings and it really lost that in adaptation. if i didn't know from the book that the shrew was terrified and fleeing and also wanting to eat maggots, i would have no idea from the panels of a close-up shrew appearing to be just chillin' -- you don't get the shrew horror until the 2-page spread of the nightmare. and speaking of the nightmare, there's barely a hint of rachel's guilt for lying to jordan and mistrusting her. if i didn't know rachel thought it was weird and creepy that mrs. chapman was mechanically chopping vegetables in utter silence, i would have no idea. i was confused in the gn when rachel accused tobias of snitching on her to cassie because when this supposedly happens on-panel, cassie is giving rachel a look and tobias just happens to be also sitting there, but in rachel's narration in the book there's like a whole paragraph about how she can tell tobias is thought-speaking to cassie privately. and this is an adaptation choice, because this problem could be solved by thought bubbles or narration boxes to give the characters literally any level of interiority, instead of having to rely on dialog and the aforementioned restricted expressiveness to get across what is originally a lot of complex thought. he ends up using thought bubbles on literally two pages of 202 and i'm sure it's because those two scenes would be literally incomprehensible without the thought bubbles helping the reader interpret what's happening, but you know what? it would be nice to have that throughout -- it would aid comprehension and it would make for richer storytelling. i'm halfway into the encounter now and that story is even more interior because of tobias's isolation; i hope grine et al. make some different adaptation decisions, because the approach in the visitor will prove unsustainable.
ok now some fun things:
i like this joke because it reminds me of henrietta pussycat from mister rogers' neighborhood
i don't remember this joke from the visitor, was it unused material from the invasion? either way, thanks for that, marco. (although i do think the speech bubble placement could be improved -- if jake says "what's your point" in the first panel instead of the second, the joke and his reaction face land better)
this is a great sight gag
lol relatable
i'm sorry but grine uses this kind of angle -- from behind rachel -- a lot in the last fight and the little x reminds me of that tweet
#sigma reads#thinky thoughts#we can't tell you who we are#thrilling picture narrative#take a look it's in a book#i am a cat lady#animorphs#animorphs graphix#the visitor#k a applegate#chris grine
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Personal Demon
Summary: Because of a mistake, you're assigned a devil instead of an angel. Pairing: Demon!Eren Jaeger x Fem!Reader Warnings & Conent: oh boy, here we go - language, mentions of suicide, mentions of self harm, mentions of rape, fingering, unprotexted sex, alcohol consumption, mentions of drug abuse, mentions of reader in an asylum, sliiiiight dumbification of reader, slight corruption of reader, Eren's a little shit Word Count: 3.9 k
A/N: So I wrote this in, like, 3-4 days because I felt like it's pretty bad but not bad enough not to post it. I hope you still enjoy it, though!
You always felt it — breathing in your nape, moving in the corner of your room at night, whispering things you shouldn't dare think about. Your own personal demon. Most of the time you did a good job at ignoring it. Most of the time you abused substances to make it go away, at least for a minute. With the puff of weed or a bottle of alcohol, it stayed away, only watching from afar and never involving itself with you. Most of the time.
Keys clung in your hands, door shutting behind as you walked into your apartment, fingers wrapped around your grocery bags. Yet another night of drinking the voice away.
"Not today, Satan." You hummed, popping open a bottle of gin, nose scrunching at the bitter taste.
"I keep telling you, the easiest way to get rid of me would be to kill yourself." It spoke, this time outside of your head.
"And I keep telling you to stay the fuck away from me." You growled back.
"We both know that's not possible."
Another sip and you put the bottle down, hands digging inside the bag for a snack.
"You're gonna need something stronger than that."
There it was, the bar of chocolate you so eagerly starved for. The TV suddenly turned on. It was craving entertainment.
"Anything unusual happened today?"
No, it was craving attention and you were not about to give it any. You put the groceries inside the fridge and grabbed the bottle, plopping on the couch.
"How long are you going to pretend I'm not here?"
"As long as I need." You snapped back, eyes glued to the TV.
"Well, that didn't last long." It laughed. "Come on, Y/N, we've been together for, what, 24 years?"
"Can you just shut up? Disappear? Crawl back to Hell?"
"Nope. Waaaaait, I know why you've got your panties in a twist. It's because that Jean guy you like hooked up with Mikasa, right?"
It was impossible to deal with. Every single second, it was there. Since you've been born, it was there, always watching, always following you, always. You tried to go to a priest, a monk, anything, but nothing helped. The angel that was supposed to guide you happened to be a demon and there was nothing you could do about it. But you were not going to give it the satisfaction of ending your pathetic life, no matter how much you wanted to, because despite being a demon, it still had to keep you alive until your time came. It, however, did like to push you over the edge, push you until you grabbed a knife and slit your wrists, only for the knife to get shoved by some invisible force before you could finish the job. It tormented you and it loved it.
"I told you, not today, Satan."
"Ugh, my name's-"
"I don't care." Your head snapped into the direction of the voice, only to be met with a wall. "Let's face it, we shouldn't have been in this situation, so why don't you shut your mouth up and let me get on with my life?"
"What life?" It laughed and you could already picture the sneer on its face, flashing you fangs and a forked tongue. "That's not even what I look like."
"Get out of my head!" You screamed before grabbing the bottle and emptying half of its contents.
"Careful, Y/N, the neighbours might call the police and you don't want to end up like last time, do you?"
Last time... you were but a child, throwing plates at the wall only to make it stop talking when your parents admitted you to an asylum. You had to live with it for half a year before they let you out.
"Please, please stay out of my head." Tears pooled at your eyes as you clutched the bottle at your chest.
"Now why would I stay out when it's just so much fun in you?"
"God, I hate you so much!"
"Me or beardy up there? I couldn't quite get it." It laughed again, laughing at your damn misery as you got up from the couch and left the apartment.
The alcohol already made its way to your brain when you reached the ground floor of the building. Rain poured outside but you didn't care, you just ran as far away from it as possible and for the first time in years, it didn't follow you. Grateful and content, you slowed down, admiring the beauty of the city which you ignored because of the voice inside of your head. The smell of rain, the colourful buildings, the empty streets, everything felt new and refreshing, and you took it all in. Time seemed to slow down without itconstantly nagging in the back of your mind and you realised you were pretty far away from your home, an area unknown to you. Still, you knew how to get back, you hoped, but when you turned around, a man pushed you into an alleyway.
"Satan?" You whispered, dizzy from the lingering gin and smell of rain. The man pinned you to a wall and finally you were beginning to realise what was happening.
"Call me whatever you want, baby, just keep that pretty voice down." His hand moved up your thigh and panic seeped through your veins. "We don't want to draw any attention, now, do we?" He kissed your neck and you froze on the spot, eyes widening in fear and body shivering.
"L-let go of me!" You managed, the alcohol numbing your arms, rendering you unable to push the stranger away.
"Shhh, don't fight it." The man squeezed your arms, his fingers bruising the soft skin. Anger, sadness and pain coiled together in your chest and you couldn't breathe anymore. Oh, how you wished you never left your flat, how you wished you stayed back and listened to itconstantly yapping, like a maggot crawling into your brain. "Aren't you a pretty one?" He cooed, his hand travelling lower, lower, to the point where tears started rolling down your cheeks, mixing with the snot and rain on your face.
And then it happened — in the blink of an eye, your assailant was thrown against the other wall by the too familiar invisible force as you sank to the ground, eyes puffy and red, legs trembling.
"The fuck? What are you?" The man hissed at you, his hands holding his abdomen.
"I'm the devil." It spoke, voice inhuman and perilous, and you could only sneer at him. For the first time you were happy it was there. Sick, twisted thoughts invaded your mind and you wanted to watch him suffer, and itknew. It knew, because the devil was always in your head.
"You crazy bitch!" The assailant, now helpless and overpowered, did not know about your own personal demon, and he tried to get up, tried to leap forward at you and strangle the last bit of air out of your lungs, but he couldn't. Somethingwas holding him back.
"You want him dead?" It asked, but you know the devil took more pleasure in inflicting pain rather than swiftly killing.
"No." You grinned, eyes dark and dangerous. "I want him to suffer."
"That's my girl."
Blood-curling screams echoed in the alleyway. You didn't know what it was doing to him, but you knew for a fact that you were enjoying the sounds that came out of your attacker. His wrists contorted in a way you didn't think was possible, and the melody of broken bones reminded you that what was happening was wrong. For a moment, your brain was rational, telling you that it should stop, that you should both just leave and forget this ever happened. But... it also felt good, it felt like you've just been reborn, discovering a deeply buried part of you that ached to be exposed. Then, his legs twisted and the man winced in pain, so much pain, and your heart fluttered in your chest.
"More?" It asked and you nodded.
"More."
His arms looped, like a deformed puppet loosely strung, and it made him dance in the rain until his body gave up from fatigue.
"Aw, I was really hoping he'd be a feisty one." It mused, and you also clicked your tongue in disappointment. Before you left, you gave your assailant a good kick in the stomach, your boot stomping on his face with so much anger and force that what remained was unrecognisable.
Wet clothes piled on the floor, you wrapped your naked body in a blanket to warm yourself up. What just happened? What did you do? Why did you allow it to happen and more importantly, why did you love every minute of it? The questions jogged in your fuzzy brain, as you slowly sobered up.
"Why did I enjoy it, Satan?" You asked, lips quivering.
"I told you, my name's not Satan, it's-"
"Eren, I know. I remember." You could feel it quirk a brow, surprised and impressed by its name rolling down your tongue so naturally. "Why did I enjoy it? It's wrong and disgusting."
"Do you remember what happens when you say my name?" It sounded almost concerned.
"You physically manifest, I know. Now answer my fuckingquestion."
"What do you want me to say?" Itasked, fragments of muscle, skin and silk pulling together from thin air. First, its legs. Then, its upper body, draped in a charcoal-black robe. "That you're as sadistic as I am? Maybe it wasn't a mistake that you have a demon, not an angel." And finally, its face materialised in front of you — long dark brown hair falling down his shoulders and eyes so green, it felt like a forest was in them. It looked almost human, the hooked nose, the elongated ears, the deeply sunken emeralds and jagged mouth betraying its true nature.
"I thought you'd have fangs." Was your only response at the scene unfolding in front of you, blanket clutched at your chest. Any normal person would shudder at the demonic sight of Eren appearing in front of them, but to you, it felt comforting to finally assign a face to the voice you so desperately tried to ignore.
"And I thought you wanted to get rid of me." It scoffed, its facial features changing, becoming softer and resembling a human man, but those eyes didn't change an ounce.
"I don't know what I want anymore. If it weren't for you, I would've been raped and dead, probably."
"Just embrace it, Y/N. Just let go of that annoying voice in your head that tells you it's wrong." He encouraged. "There's no such thing as good or bad, right or wrong. It's just surviving, adapting or dying."
Eren looked unbelievably human and incredibly handsome in the dim light of your living room lamp. Maybe it was the alcohol that hasn't left your body yet, or maybe it was the fact that he saved you, again, but the truth was that the devil in your house was making you feel something you couldn't even feel for Jean — and you thought you were in love with Jean.
"Alright, let's pretend for a moment that I give into temptation." Your eyes found his and you felt hypnotised, the rational part of your brain slowly overshadowed by your instincts and feelings. "What then? Do you leave me alone? Do you go back to hell? Do Igo to hell?"
"Oh, I wouldn't call it hell. More like a demonic paradise." He shrugged, eyes bored and blank, devout of any emotion. You leaned forward trying to search for something in his darkened orbs.
"Why are you being nice to me? You're supposed to save me from death, not rape."
He clicked his tongue, your question drilling into his brain, repeating itself over and over again. Why did he save you? It's not like he cared, he only did his job, right? Right?
Wrong.
The demon you grew up with, the demon who tormented you, the demon who tried so desperately to ruin your life did, in fact, give two shits about you and your pathetic existence. Just not in the way you thought.
"Let's just say no one gets to touch you but me." Eren closed the gap between you two, his nose almost grazing over yours. He was absolutely intoxicating and you always fought with the constant need to let him control you. After all, he was always with you, he saw you hit your lowest points, he saw the best of you, he saw your naked body, he saw everything, ergo you were his. Your head quickly turned to the side before you leaned back, exhaustion written all over your face as Eren clicked his tongue. The thing about demons was that they couldn't physically interfere without their human's consent, only using invisible force to stop you from dying and he was just so close.
"Ah, but you can't touch me, though." You trailed off, brow quirked at his narrowed eyes. You've done your homework, you knew what he needed, but still, that side of you tried to prevail over the side that craved his touch.
"Yet." Eren snapped back before your drifted to sleep.
Once again you dreamt of it him, his cock buried deep inside your needy cunt as you screamed his name over and over again while you came undone. When you jolted up from your sleep, he was there, watching you, like a predator stalking its prey. Normally he wouldn't be there, but since you called his name, Eren was glaring down at your helpless body, famished for something only you could give him.
"What's the time?" You groaned, fingers rubbing your eyelids.
"Three in the morning." He answered, eyes glued to you. "Bad dream?" The demon sneered. You knew he'd been in your head again, you knew those dreams existed for a reason.
"They wouldn't be bad if you'd just stay the fuck out of my mind." You hummed with a fake smile.
"Alright then, look me in the eye and tell me, reallytell me you want me to leave you alone." But you couldn't and he knew it. "Stop fighting it, Y/N. For two decades you kept trying. Maybe you should stop being stubborn and just give in." Eren shrugged, his voice tempting and you only wondered if that's how Eve felt when the snake tempted her. You weren't a Christian by any means, but you knew the story well enough to figure out the consequences.
"I have work tomorrow. Please let me sleep." You got up from the couch, blanket wrapped around your shoulders.
And that's when Eren reached his limits. He followed you into your bedroom, something knocking the wind out of you as you fell on the mattress. Somethingpulling the blanket off of you. Somethingtravelling down your arms, goosebumps dotting your skin as he stood in the doorway.
"I can't touch you, but I can do so many things to you." He inched closer, his figure imposing and dangerous and you could feel your core burning. "I can smell your arousal, Y/N. I know you want it. You just have to say it." Eren demanded and you hated that he was right. Slowly but surely, the battle in your heart and mind was coming to an end the more he got closer to the bed. "Say it."
You whined and writhed in pain and pleasure, and in the blink of an eye your life flashed before your eyes as you came to the conclusion that you've tried so hard to stay away from the demon, but either he was too persistent, or you were too weak. Or you just simply wanted him to ravage you and you were okay with that. Your hands stopped moving, your body stopped fighting.
"Do it..." You half-begged, judgement clouded, vision blurry. "Please, do it! Touch me, break me, fuck me, please! I need you, need to feel you..."
Like some sort of spell had just been lifted, Eren felt relieved. The sight of your sprawled body, combined with the lustful look in your lidded eyes only fed his hunger and he was famished. Calloused fingertips grazed over your knees, up your thighs, sending chills down your spine as you arched your back, pulling the demon closer to your face.
"Kiss me?" You asked, voice sweet and needy and he crushed his lips onto yours. They were surprisingly soft, tasting of whiskey and honey and the flavour lingered on your lips after he pulled away. Your body quivered under his touch, yearning for more, hands tugging at his silken robe to expose the chiselled chest. Eren pressed his forehead onto yours, hot breath tickling your cheeks.
"I'm going to ruin you, Y/N." He dug his teeth into your shoulder, the imprint burning into your skin, all the pent-up frustration slowly being released with each movement. He dragged one hand over your breasts before settling on one nipple, fingers pinching it to earn a reaction out of you. A whimper escaped from your lips as you pushed your chest upwards, wanting him closer than the laws of physics would allow. Your slender hands tangled in his locks as Eren left a trail of purple marks and bites all over your neck and shoulder.
"Fill me up, please..."
"Patience." He mused. "I've waited so many years for this, you can wait a few more minutes." Head buried between your tits, his hand travelled lower until it found your wet cunt. Fingers grazed over your folds before he drove his index into your soaked pussy and that's when you knew just how much you craved him. Your silken walls clenched around his curled-up finger and your neediness made him add another one, moans drilling through his eardrums, into his brain. "Fuck, you're so wet..." Eren hummed, vibrations tickling your skin. You couldn't form a coherent sentence even if your life counted on it. All you could think about was that if his fingers stretched you, his cock would tear your cunt apart — and you reallywanted to feel that. Fingernails dug into his back and he hissed, his tongue flicking your nipple and all the build-up was too much for you.
"Eren, please..." You mewled, your chest rising and falling with each breath, with each touch, each lick.
"You want me to fuck you? Want me to tear you apart?" The demon growled. His sudden change in tone only further added fuel to the fire inside your core and you eagerly nodded.
"Yes, God — yes! But Eren, I want to see you, not this pretty face you put on." You pleaded, eyes teary and demanding.
"No." He simply answered and that instantly made you jolt up, forcefully pushing him off of you.
"Are you trying to screw with my mind again? You've literally been with me for 24 years!" You shouted, and even Eren was slightly confused. "You tormented me for two decades, put me in an asylum, constantly stopped me from killing myself and now I can't even see the real you?" You threw your hands at him and he caught your wrists with ease. "You owe me at least that, Satan." Tears freely rolled down your face and you could feel his hot tongue lick the salty drops from your cheek. Your pain was his pleasure, he was a demon after all, the embodiment of all evil, but he decided you were corruptedenough to at least see his true colours, which you only managed to glance at.
"You're right, Y/N," Eren kissed your forehead and you couldn't even notice the manipulative hints in his voice, "you deserve at least this." He pulled back, and slowly his face distorted, allowing you to look at his disfigured mouth, elongated ears and abnormally long tongue.
"Thank you, thank you!" You beamed with bright eyes.
The woman who battled her demon? Gone.
In her place stood only a shell of a person, whose sole purpose was to get fucked by the demon in front of her. You feverishly parted his lips with your tongue, touch-starved and desperate, and Eren threw you onto the bed, robe pooled on the floor. And you were right, his cock wouldtear you apart by the looks of it. Before he could do anything, you spread your legs for him, like a good little slut, mouth agape and nothing but lust in your eyes. The sneer on his face was unlike anything you've seen before, and it both terrified and aroused you.
"Eager to please, aren't you?" He climbed onto the bed, the velvety tip of his cock barely touching your wet slit.
"I'm begging you, Eren, please fuck me!"
The demon scoffed at your pathetic words, but he couldn't deny how much he loved to hear your needy voice. You wouldn't have to know that, of course. He ever so slowly pushed the tip in between your folds, your cunt greedily taking it all in while you whimpered at the foreign sensation.
"Shhh," Eren cooed at you mockingly, "you love it, don't you?"
"Y-yes, please, d-deeper..."
Was it really you speaking or was this another one of his demonic tricks? And more importantly, did it even matter that he made you say those things when his cock felt just so good inside of you? Your legs wrapped around his waist, pulling him closer to you as Eren thrusts became harder. Your tits bounced with every move, pleasure engulfing both of you and you never knew demons fucked so raw.
"Fuck, you're so tight." He hissed into your ear, the compliment only making you clench your walls around his impossibly hard cock. "Such a good girl." Eren praised you, knowing perfectly well how much you lacked appreciation from your parents, knowing perfectly well how your childhood traumas and frustration only aided him. He was your demon, after all. When your only response was to roll your eyes at the back of your head like a possessed woman, Eren picked up the pace, his abnormal tongue licking at your collarbone.
"D-do you l-like it?" You asked, concerned that he might not be satisfied with you. He wouldn't be fucking you so hard if he didn't, but you were so brainwashed that nothing made sense anymore.
"I do, doll, now be a good whore and rub that clit, will you?" The demon urged and with a shaky hand you complied, the friction mixed with his thrusts sending you into a frenzy. You were close and he knew it.
"Oh, f-fuck! Eren!"
His cock hit that sweet spot and you were done for, your legs loosened around his waist, falling onto the bed, but he kept on fucking you.
"My turn." Eren growled, his hands lifting your hips like you were some sort of ragdoll between his fingers. Your vision blurred, every word you tried to utter lost in your throat the more he buried himself into you, yet somehow you still managed to clench your walls. With one final thrust you felt him spill his hot seed, cum dripping out of your sore cunt as he pulled out.
Eren plopped next to you and you curled up in a ball, head on his chest. You were craving his attention, his care, but he responded by bringing his hands behind his head, eyes staring blankly at the ceiling. He wanted to hold you tightly, he wanted to pet your head, but he couldn’t. And you were alright with that, because you knew that, no matter what, you would always have your own personal demon at your side.
#eren jaeger#eren smut#eren x reader#eren jaeger x reader#eren yaeger x reader#eren jaeger smut#eren yaeger smut#aot#aot x reader#aot smut#attack on titan#snk#snk x reader#snk smut#shingeki no kyoujin
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He was thankful he had L to watch his back and make sure he didn't carry any bugs he didn't mean to. After their panic with the bloatflies that one time he still picked at the scars the maggots left behind. "Oh nice. We can use them for spare parts. If they've got meat I could fry it up into steaks." Helping him tie up the meat he cleaned off his blade again before stuffing it back into his bag. Once everything was settled they started moving on again. With the stag they were making good time and its natural luminosity helped light up the path.
It was near dawn when they reached where the ferals were nesting. Leaving the stag back a ways they crept up to the abandoned junkyard. Seeing several dozen ghouls shuffling about he looked to L. "Ok I'm gonna toss the noisemakers as far as I fucking can. You take them out when they group together. Once the stragglers are done we'll do a second check to make sure there aren't any wigglers." Nodding he got up and tossed the noisemaker granade as far as he could. It went off and all the ghouls went running for the sound filing out of cars and hidden holes.
The synth had woken up before Alice again, trying his hair back out the way and just wearing one of Alice’s shirts and his boxers he began his daily routine whilst the soldier slept; he made sure their supplies were full the canteens filled with water, he did a check on their medical supplies then he went through the weapon supplies, dismantling and cleaning guns he put them back together and made sure they were working well before he pull the small whetstone from his pack and began to sharpen Alice’s knife.
@carsonsquad
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