#I'm never capable of liking things a normal amount never trust me when I say that

[skylerhyrule]

ngl I've been sitting on a lot of this for a while and now that the brainrot has come to consume me once again, I have to inflict them upon you too because this is all your fault <3

woe, htbf winter headcanosn be upon ye

They don't take as many jobs in the winter because traveling in bad weather sucks which leaves more room for lazy days where none of them have any plans other than eating together and enjoying their company

the other 3 use the time to teach touya more skills or practice old ones like knitting/sewing, smaller woodworking projects that can be done indoors (not that touya or akito mind being outside in cold weather), or touya reads his favorite mystery books out loud to them and he lives how they speculate the ending or the twist all the while he knows exactly whats going to happen since he's read it before

Touya makes himself a sweater and it's awkwardly shaped and definitely has some missing stitches in some places but he made it with materials he bought with money earned and it's all his and he's proud of it

An and Kohane cried

All of the years touya spent his winters looked up in the castle, he thought he didn't mind the cold weather when really he was just overall unable to feel the warmth that he was missing, that even now, when he had literal ice magic and is physically cold all the time due to his naturally lower body temperature, he's never felt warmer

Sobs. Anyways

Touya has seen snow and walked in it before but he's never been allowed to play in the snow

After the first big snow that sticks to the ground, akianhane plan a massive attack on their training field, they pretend theyre going to train touya during prime ice season but SIKE they have a snow fight: a full battle field built up with pre-built walls and snowballs ready to attack

They prepared ahead of time because they thought touya might have a natural advantage but he was too nervous to actually use his magic with intent to fight his family so he gets his ass kicked

they have so much fun and anhane get so cold that they get sick after and the boys have to nurse them back to health. idiots

speaking of training, touya has been using the colder temps to experiment more with what he can create and how he can create things to use to his advantage

On clearer days he tries to practice making snow the same way he did at his failed execution (insert processing trauma here) but he hasnt been able to do it. most of the time he accidentally shoots a bunch of chunks of ice in the sky or makes hail but not snow-like crystals

Somehow someone suggests trying to get touyas adrenaline running because hes only been capable of big moves like that when tensions were high (escaping guards and escaping death)

They figure if they can elicit (a healthy amount of) fear from him, he can learn how to better act on instinct and not overthink it

Out in the training field, the other 3 take turns “fighting” touya with their magic to see if that can get something out of him (insert cool fights and banter here)

When that doesn't work, they take a break lying in the snow and talk about what scares them (insert emotional connection and vulnerabilities here)

They figure out touyas most “normal” fear is heights, so naturally Kohane lifts them all however high in the air so that they can see above the surrounding treetops. Touya is CLINGING to akito but not quite fearing for his life, just scared enough because he's not actually afraid of Kohane dropping them and his trust in An and Akito to intervene if something goes wrong is too strong

But theyre like NO you have to trust YOURSELF

Kohane says "I'm gonna drop us if you dont make it snow right now and itll be all your fault

yeah right, that's a bluff, Touya's confident

She shakes the platform a bit so the edges start crumbling to the ground and he feels that fight flight or freeze instinct come in (an and akito are also freaked out now) shes not kidding (but she probably is) (but what if she isnt)

she drops the platform barely a few centimeters and touya reaches an arm out and tries

Ummm he tries a bit too well and he sends a burst of magic up high and it shimmers down as snow. He did it!

Kohane brings them down slowly and once on the ground he tries to remember what it felt like and does it again but he didn't realize how low he felt due to the adrenaline and feels faint

the other 3 walk him home and keep telling him how proud they and what a good job he did

important to note that they never make him feel like he's burdening them with having to carry him home once he starts feeling sleepy or taking so much time to train him gradually even though touya thinks that he should be somewhat sorry for passing out on them again, if he apologized they would just yell at him

he falls asleep on Akito's back and wakes up under five blankets and the fireplace burning with dry clothes on and Akito sleeping on top of him

he has just enough strength to reach for the water on their bedside table and then he passes out again

next time he wakes up, its the next morning and he is absolutely dying of too many blankets, they went overboard with trying to warm him up and now he's too warm

he rolls out of bed without disturbing the others and carries on his morning with coffee and reading until the others wake :)

So these werent actually hcs. I think I just accidentally wrote a fic in bullet form HAHA APRIL FOOLs

I have some questions also if thats okay, if you find the time

is touya able to manipulate snow and/or any frozen water or is he just able to create it and to what extent is he able to precisely create his ice?

I also have questions about the mechanics of Kohane's magic because the argument can be made that ice is technically a mineral and therefore a part of the earth? I don't mean to be annoying but I am genuinely interested in the limitations of their magic abilities.

As far as like, winter holidays go, is there something like a celebration where they could exchange gifts?

Assuming the vsingers are gods, would their “birthdays” or anniversaries be considered holidays? Like is August 31st the most holy day of the year

Another unrelated question, what is the situation of Akitos runaway sister? because in my head, I have the rough idea of a plot where Mizuki and Touya become unlikely bestest best friends for life and accidentally find her and attempt to reunite her with akito which I think adds another interesting and unique family dynamic to this series full of interesting and unique family dynamics

Okay thats all for now I have more probably but I need to write them down first thank you for your time

Ngl i don't even want to answer this so it will be in my inbox forever actually. Anyway!

YOU’RE SOBBING???? I’M SOBBING!!!! Ana… my god. These are all canon now okay. Thanks.

Touya giving prizes (food/wooden hampter DHJAH) to whoever guesses the killer/motive first… Fighting to get Touya his next favourite book…

I am also going to cry. I want to write Touya making a sweater now… don’t make me do it. I already have too many wips and now you're gonna make me want to write MORE??? Fuck you.

SHUT UP OUGHH GH You don’t know how bad it is until it’s no longer normal. When the baseline is cold, of course you’re going to think it’s perfectly fine. Until you find a fire and realise you’ve been shivering the whole time.

Touya you’re the only snow angel I need ;)

Touya’s scared he’s gonna accidentally throw a chunk of ice and kill someone.

Touya “never been sick in his life” Tenma: Why are you dying?

Akito is relegated to heater so Touya has to make soup alone and he’s freaking out but then Anhane cry when eating it and he’s like IS IT THAT BAD?? But no they’re just like… Wrow… Touya’s homemade soup… I’m cured.

Touya freezing the grass so bad it just snaps in half when they walk on it lmao. Making spiral/snowflake patterns across the grass and river. And of course. The promised ice skating.

You’re just making me want to write this entire section you know. Was this your evil plan. Bc it’s working. So well.

Touya: “I’m afraid of heights…” Akito: Your bedroom was like 20m above the ground. Touya: Do NOT remind me.

An: Can you pelt Akito with hail?

Ice shields ice shields ice shie-

Haha freeze instinct.

Thank you for the touya fainting scenarios it’s what I think about like 50% of the time. And why I want to write this. I can be trusted with fictional characters.

Ough god they love each other and have to make sure they all freaking know it.

On the couch, straight up “sleeping under it” and by “it”, haha, well, let’s just say. Blankito be upon ye

Touya not in the bed that morning and they’re all freaking out thinking he melted or smth in the night.

The best April fools prank ever actually thank u can I write this (eventually)

There appears to be a lost Victorian child asking me questions in my inbox. Of course, Victorian child, I have time.

is touya able to manipulate snow and/or any frozen water or is he just able to create it and to what extent is he able to precisely create his ice?

Later on once he has way more control he can shatter natural ice, or fling it in a direction, but he couldn’t force it into a shape or make it float in the air. He can’t do anything to snow. I suppose technically he could bc snow IS ice, but the laws of nature are irrelevant to the laws of ME. If he concentrates hard enough he could make almost anything out of his own ice, but sharper edges are easier than curves.

I also have questions about the mechanics of Kohane's magic because the argument can be made that ice is technically a mineral and therefore a part of the earth? I don't mean to be annoying but I am genuinely interested in the limitations of their magic abilities.

She can’t pick and choose btwn minerals and the components of the earth that she moves. It’s sort of just an all or nothing grab at whatever area she chooses. She can manipulate chunks of rock like a cliff face, but not in large areas. She can’t use ice. And bold of u to assume I thought these through while writing.

As far as like, winter holidays go, is there something like a celebration where they could exchange gifts? + Assuming the vsingers are gods, would their “birthdays” or anniversaries be considered holidays? Like is August 31st the most holy day of the year

I was just gonna say “generic Christmas replacement.” (Len died for your sins) But yes I like that too much. I’ll say there’s a small gift swapping at the end of the year, but Miku’s birthday is more important/the bigger celebration. HM okay wait:

The Kagamine’s birthday is actually a great replacement for Christmas. So 27/12 they do a minor gift swap in their name. Kaito 17/2 can be Day of Devotion (did not steal that from FEH. (Valentines)). Meiko 5/11 is Thanksgiving?? Harvest day??  Luka 30/1 I want to put as some Astral celebration. Like. Guaranteed star showers or smth. They eat octopus to celebrate DSJAHDHAKJ.

Another unrelated question, what is the situation of Akitos runaway sister? because in my head, I have the rough idea of a plot where Mizuki and Touya become unlikely bestest best friends for life and accidentally find her and attempt to reunite her with akito which I think adds another interesting and unique family dynamic to this series full of interesting and unique family dynamics

Ena met Kanade and Mafuyua few years after she left and lives with them. I have not thought of it beyond that tbh. I mainly just mentioned her bc I wasn’t going to pretend Akito DIDN’T have a sister. Smth smth Mafuyu is a spirit trapped/connected to a snow globe from a curse she doesn’t remember. (she was human tho) Kanade had been trying to free her. Ena accidentally stumbles upon them and sticks around bc Kanade liked her art. She doesn’t have magic. Idk if I mentioned that in the fic. Kanade can write sheet music in the air and it will just. Play. Mizutouya besties yippee. Yes please. They go to a clothing store and Touya is like. Mizuki this woman looks like Akito’s sister. “No way! Akito’s way too ugly to be related to her!” Ena whips around like did someone say AKITO?? Ruh roh. Mizuki would eventually join Ena and n25, dragging them into the connected hmds group.

Anyway you've killed me dead are you happy i'm sobbing thank you so much

[thievescanted]

cal-as-companion..... part the second

Story Specific

MY DOG ALMOST DELETED THIS........ anyway

How does your Tav advise the player character when it comes to the Dream Visitor?

"I don't trust them, but I trust that their interests are aligned with ours - only for the moment. And I'm trusting you to know when to cut and run - although we can't really run from them, can we...? Bit unsettling. But as long as they can work to our benefit, let's let them. Even if I really, really don't like it."

How do they advise the player character on Raphael?

"Oh, I don't trust that one any farther than I can throw him. Trust me, I know the type, and getting into bed with his like never ends well. ... Let's see where he's going with this, though."

How do they react to Astarion biting the Player Character?

THATS HER BEST FRIEND! i think when theyre both companions they feel theyre like, rivals for tavs protection at the start lmao but if one of them is in charge then that kind of neutralizes that. she would definitely come clean about her situation from the start because she knows he also has a Situation - she offers to keep his vampirism secret in exchange for his secrecy about her death (she doesnt really like people knowing, partially because she feels her employer makes her a liability, and partly because she hates the thought of anyone pitying her)

she also would let him drink her blood, mostly because she's curious about whether her blood would even be consumable (it is, it's quite normal actally, which is more confusing to her really) but also because like. to her it would feel kind of fucked up for her not to help him if shes perfectly capable of helping

i misunderstood this question im realizing now. im not deleting all that though. if he tries to bite her she will be surprised to see him, and push him off pretty harshly; however she'll tell him "you could have just asked, and i would have," and she will let him drink from her

How do they react to the Player Character letting Abdirak whip them?

before: Definitely not going to help with our particular situation, but I suppose it can't hurt. Or - actually, it literally can. Still, I say give it a try! during: (after the first hit) Shit, I wasn't looking. Can you do it again? after: Well. I think you have to get married now.

How do they react to the Player Character taking their first tadpole power?

she's fine with the player doing it! she figures any way they can make themself stronger is a better chance that they all stay alive. HOWEVER she would not want to do it herself - "I barely feel like I'm my own with this thing in my head. I'm certainly not going to feed the damn thing."

Will they stay with the Player Character regardless of siding with the goblins or the tieflings, or is it possible for them to leave the party permanently?

cal approves of helping the tieflings, and disapproves immensely of helping the cult. it won't cause her to leave, but it will set her approval almost as low as it can get without her leaving. if you side with the cult/the goblins she'll say that she trusts that you have your reasons, but she doesn't really want to know them

What can they be found doing at the tiefling/goblin party?

at the tiefling party: cal will confide that she stole a decent amount of whiskey from the goblin camp and invite you to have some with her. she thanks you for doing all you did to help the tieflings - she hadn't let herself believe she was someone who could do this kind of good. then she'll immediately start gossiping about rolan. she will invite a ftav/durge/origin character to join her for the night if they like (she will then skirt around defining your relationship for. a While. its a bit of an isabela situation) (this would be the players first time seeing her wound (you can see it later in-game if shes not romanced but since shes taking her shirt off to sleep with the character, Well). she feels Complicated about that). if not romanced at the party cal will hook up with shadowheart or lae'zel

at the goblin party: the player can find her pulling grass out of the ground by her tent and piling it up on a blanket. she'll say, "Do you mind? I'm kind of in the middle of something." she will make it very clear to you that to her you are a "convenient and capable meat-shield" and suggest that you keep it to just business. you can ask to join her for the night and she will say: "What, really? You don't want to look a little farther afield? Can't imagine you'd want to fuck someone who hates you. Unless - what, are you into that kind of thing?"

>On second thought, never mind. Cal: Grand. There's my evening free. Off you go, then, I've very important business to conduct here. > And if I am? Cal: Well, I suppose I can't say I haven't wondered. Let's get that out of our systems, then.

pursuing that will close off her romance entirely though lol.

Do they have comments on who the Player Character chooses to spend the night with?

if lae'zel: Soo... you and Lae'zel seem quite friendly tonight. Friendly as I've ever seen her, anyway. Just, uh, don't get too bruised up - busy day ahead of us tomorrow and all. if gale: So is Gale going to show you some magic tricks? Going to learn some useful applications of ray of frost? Are you two going to fuck, is what I'm asking. In case that wasn't clear. if shadowheart: You and Shadowheart seemed pretty cozy together just now. Leave some room for Shar, will you? I'm afraid her lady may smite you both. if astarion: Didn't think that one had the capacity to be interested in anyone that wasn't him - wonders never cease, eh? I'd make sure he's had something to eat before you get up to anything, though. Manslaughter does dampen the mood of a party. if wyll: Saw you talking to Wyll earlier. You left him looking rather more cheerful than he's been all night - good on you. I don't suppose you could lure him a little closer to the party? We're short a dance partner. (cares about him, is annoyed about it) if karlach: Karlach seems positively taken with you, you know. It really is a shame you can't really get to know each other. Still, you two have fun... talking all night, or whatever it is you can do. Sounds terribly romantic. Eugh.

Do they have unique dialogue if the Player Character lets them die when they steal the Blood of Lathander?

Cal: Hey, so, uh. Not to put too fine a point on it or anything, but remember when I told you about how I died? And how that was kind of a traumatizing thing for me? And then you killed me? No no, it's fine, I'm not mad. (note: shes mad but holding it together) I'm just disappointed. Next time - and I know there will be some kind of next time - maybe just... warn me? A little heads up?

How do they react if the PC licks the dead spider in the Gauntlet of Shar?

Cal: So... does it taste bad... or good...? I'm getting some mixed messages.

What do they say if the PC tries to force them to go up on stage with Dribbles the Clown?

Cal: I want you to know I've always hated you. And if he tries to do any close-up magic near me I'm killing him.

Is it possible for your Tav to be kidnapped and replaced by Orin? How is Orin's deception revealed? How do they react to the PC rescuing them in the Temple of Bhaal?

YEAH she can be. ive been toying with the idea that cal had been killed by bhaalists, so i think orin would like the idea of having her back

the pc will wake to find cal watching them. when they wake, cal will tell them that she's been thinking about what gortash said, about orin having infiltrated the camp. that she thinks she knows a way to prove that you're both yourselves - she'll show you a couple knives and suggest that making a shapechanger bleed might reveal its true form ("I'm only talking a gentle stabbing, nothing too bloody.") if you refuse she'll reveal herself as orin; if you go along with it she will in fact stab you pretty hard. orin will tell you that "Callie-girl is safe with me" and propose her whole deal to you, whereupon she'll add that "She's marked for us, so it might be difficult to let her go."

when you free cal, she tries to put on her usual unbothered facade but she will be pretty clearly shaken

Cal: Gods, it's you. It-it is you... right? Fuck. No, I'm alright, I just have about fifty more mental images about how I might die, courtesy of Orin. Let's get out of here? Please?

How do they react to the PC either allowing Astarion to ascend or convincing him to spare the 7000 spawn?

if astarion is ascended: Shit. He really did it. And we... let him. Helped him, even... I guess the choice is made and there's nothing for it. Still, I just hope he's still... you know, him. if astarion remains a spawn: I wasn't sure he would be able to turn down all that power. The guarantee that you'll be truly safe, that you won't have to die again... It's a lot to walk away from. ... Not that I've thought about it extensively or anything. Anyway I'm proud of him really, but don't tell him so.

How does Tav react to the PC becoming a mind flayer? Can they offer to become one themselves? Does their reaction change if they’re romanced?

cal will nottt take the astral tadpole ("I just don't think I have a face for tentacles") but she won't object to a PC that chooses to take it for themself. if romanced, she'll confess that she's a little uneasy about the prospect of you changing, but that she knows you'll stay you, and she trusts you

How do they react when the Dark Urge first reveals their amnesia and murderous thoughts to them?

Cal: Well that's, uh... Shit, you're telling the truth, aren't you? I mean, you did always kind of strike me as worryingly good at killing, so I guess that makes a weird sort of sense. Wait, you haven't thought about killing me, have you? (if playing a female character): I mean, it'd be fine if you have. Wouldn't hold it against you, like.

How do they react to the Dark Urge killing Alfira?

well she does not like it i can tell you that much! she will disapprove when you say you don't remember, but she'll take your word for it and compared to like, wyll or karlach shes less horrified Cal: Let's just... save the murderous intent for people we don't like, yeah?

If romanced, how do they react to the Dark Urge trying to kill them in Act 2?

well unfortunately. due to how she is as a person. i think she would be a little into it initially. when she wakes to durge holding a knife to her throat, her first instinct is to sit up and kiss them, at which point they can tell her shes in danger.

Cal: Shit, sorry. It's the, uh. Adrenaline. Wait, danger? Were you actually going to kill me?

she will tie durge and sit with them through the night, responding fondly to their threats ("Aww, promise?") and encouraging durge to come back to her ("I know you're in there, and I know you're more than this. When you fight your way back to the surface, I'll be here. That's love - you showed me that.")

[myristicisms]

@darckcarnival || ??? (Darck) says;;

❛  tell me what you need.  ❜

How filthy a job it was, when one first joins a career meant to help, they never quite think it would involve putting those who were sick in some form or another ( infected ) - he has to remind himself - out of their misery. It was rotten work, something that stained the tips of his fingers with an ichor that no amount of scrubbing could cleanse from his flesh and yet he continued on. Vaguely he recalls a familiar voice, one that belonged to someone long since gone and it's that that makes him jolt back into action. ' Don't get distracted on the field, Pup. '

How odd it was, to hear that nickname once again even if it was nothing more than a hallucination, an old haunting memory that made a pitiful wretched sound burst from his throat, the sound of a blunt edge crashing into the skull of one of the creatures ( not human, not anymore ) fully awakening the usual survival instincts Zack had spent years honing, had drilled into him since he was some starry eyed kid joining the U.B.C.S in some stupid attempt at being a hero because it'd been his dream to be a hero. God he was so dumb, had he just went into a normal career like being a fire fighter maybe he'd have had a chance at a normal life, a white picket fence home with a lovely spouse and a dog and cat, instead he was here, cleaning up the mess of another damned attack knowing damn well the B.S.A.A is likely going to find a way to make him feel like shit for not being efficient enough.

That'd been happening a lot lately, though perhaps it was just from loneliness, having to file all the paperwork once he came back from each mission taking up almost all of his time, the raven haired soldier was someone who needed to socialize, otherwise he'd grow intensely depressed and lately his form of socializing was trying to find survivors and keep them safe and calm until more help arrived. Lately he hadn't been too successful and that too wore on him. Signs of life often managed to cheer him up though, be it from a footstep that sounded too coordinated to be a B.O.W albeit nowadays even those left him antsy, especially after his run in with what the T-Abyss virus was capable of.

Ever alert, he'd take a guess that the slowly approaching footsteps were human enough, there was no sound to indicate otherwise and so he forces himself to ease up enough, allows himself to feel the bone chilling ache of over exertion seep into his muscles and realizes he'd finally made himself a safe spot to rest temporarily, perhaps even found a companion ( more like they found me, hopefully they're friendly. ) Aqua eyes fixate on the beginnings of shadows dancing upon the floor, once more further justifying that whoever was slowly approaching, likely from the sound of his prior scuffle with what lays dead at his feet now, was definitely not a B.O.W, or at least if they were, they were easy to mistake for being human.

Then he sees a woman, she's smaller than he is but that wasn't exactly a difficult feat to accomplish given how large Zack himself was, amusement creeps upon him for a moment at the fact that he's only bumped into a few people that managed to barely tower over him only to properly return his focus upon the stranger. He's about ready to speak before he hears her voice, her statement, and suddenly he's left confused; Looks damn near startled.

“ I think I'm the one who's supposed to be telling you that. ” A soft chuckle rests within his tired voice before he shrugs, tufts of raven spikes bouncing with the gesture as he slowly slides his sword back onto its holster attached to his back. “ I don't know if I need anything right now, though I think maybe an introduction might be the closest thing. I'm with the B.S.A.A- just call me Zack, please -I'm here to clean up whatever the hell happened here and evacuate any survivors. ” Far too trusting as always and yet a survivor was a survivor, it wasn't as though he was worried about being attacked given the stranger likely would have done so by now rather than demand to know what he might have been hurting for.

Really he'd already gotten exactly what he needed anyways; companionship, even if temporary or even something that led him to his own demise, at least he'd be less lonely and that in of itself was enough to drive him into willingly opening himself as he always did to those he attempted to help. “ Now then, is there anything you need? Rations, a weapon, a bodyguard or something? Not that you aren't capable given you look pretty okay to me right now but it doesn't hurt to ask, right? ”

[gameofsuperdead]

This is long, but I need to tell you this because I have noone else.  Noone else will understand and you are the most appropriate person to tell and I have to say it because when I sit alone with myself, my thoughts, it drowns me. I drown.

I hate myself.  I hate myself and I hate the prospect that I am going to be alone and lonely for the rest of whatever amount of life I have left. I genuinely do not understand why I can't have what seems to come so easily to so many other people but I also don't want to be the type of person that places any weight in who I am as a person, according to whether or not I am in a relationship - I hate that. 

I really felt very strongly that you were who I was going to spend the rest of my life with.  And when that didn't happen, it quite literally broke me.  It left me empty, hard, jaded.  I spent from 2019 to just over a week ago with another man that I was incapable of truly loving. I wasn't able to trust him, to open up to him, to rely on him, in any way.  And that relationship wasn't meant to last, he was a rebound. He was a way for me to try to stay away from you.  It was so nice in the beginning, because he said nice things.  That was literally it.  He just said nice things.  So I completely ignored all of the other red flags, things that I knew I was never going to be able to reconcile or come to terms with, but I still let him move in.  And I still chose to let him share my space with me and the boys.  And I never should have.  And because I did, it allowed that relationship to persist for much much longer than it should have.

But even after he finally left, I was sad.  I loved him like you love a person that has been in your life for 5 years, like another human being that you care for, but I wasn't in love with him.  I dont think I'm capable of that anymore.  But it still hurt after he was gone, even though I made him leave, I wanted him gone.  It made me sad.  Lonely.  Even more convinced that I'm not going to have what I want. Maybe if I could've loved him, could've trusted him, could've coddled him, he could've been better.  Been what I needed.  Not been so selfish, and immature, and entitled and wanted to learn how to be a father figure and have hopes and ambition and a desire to work towards things, to want and be better.  Or maybe he couldn't, because he was also damaged, or just a Narcissist. But I still internalize it and make it my fault.

Just like I internalize me and you, and make us my fault.  And everything that happened to the boys and everything that they continue to go through, spoils me.  Rots me. And its partly because I can't justify why as horrible as you became, I still loved you. Still have love for you.  And I cant make that make sense.  I still mourn for us, for what we could and should have been and should be.  And a normal person would've have moved on so fast and any time any memory of our time that may have crept up, it would've sent them into a rage with such a fire that it forged them into some new spectacular force of a human, a better most best version of themself and they never would have thought about you or us again and felt any sadness or remorse or loss.

But I'm not that person.  I stay sad.  And I stay longing. And I stay lost. And I shouldnt.  And it makes me feel like there is something terribly wrong with me.  Loving you makes me sad. And when I try to forget to love you, I try to remember all the awful things instead and use the fuel of how it affected the boys to burn all that love away. And sometimes it does.  But in the ash is always ALWAYS an ember that is more love than hate.  And it makes me feel like a terrible mother.  Just the worst.  And it makes me feel like I don't want to be in another relationship because it isnt us, and so I cant trust it because The One that was supposed to be My One, I couldn't trust and if I couldn't trust that, then I can't trust myself and if I can't trust myself then I can't trust anyone, or anything.  And then I circle back to just being me.  And I wish, I wish I could be happy with that.  I need to learn how to be happy with me and just me and not need the thing that I know I can't have.  Because I cant have you and I cant have us and I cant see any alternative.  I am irreparable.  And I'm trying not to be, but it is very very hard.

[post-finem]

Witch's Log 1

They said I should write. My conversations with the wood typically involve a bit more specificity, but this didn't feel like a request from the wood... it felt like advice. The wood speaks more with feeling than with sound and translating that is... complicated. With that being said, I get the sense that the wood was trying to help me.

Normally, I feel when the wood needs my help, and I do what I can to keep them safe and healthy — they are my home, after all. They help me all the time, too, but this is the first time I've gotten advice like this. When I'm hungry, they point me in the direction of food; when I'm struggling to handle a spell, they help me feel its edges; they help me find the ingredients I need for my potions; and somehow, I even manage to find exactly the right parts I need for my clocks washed up by the crick every couple weeks — no rust or anything!

Lately though, I've started to feel lonely. I haven't seen... anyone, in about 400 years. I spent the first 300 of those years happier than I had ever been before; thrilled to finally be alone. Eventually, though, I started feeling like maybe I wouldn't mind if somebody wandered in. That's not possible, of course; nothing this deep in the wood has been connected to the chronological realm for centuries, and the outer layers of the wood are all but impenetrable to mortals now.

It's for the best. Even when I lived as a mortal... it was different. I was different. I never knew why, but everyone else seemed to. It was as if an aura they all could feel surrounded me, whispering,

"This one's different. Not to be trusted. Useful, maybe, but certainly not one of us."

Luckily, I've long been a lover of solitude, but something strange happened recently. I was working on a new clock - the hardest I've built yet - and all of my attempts so far had been disastrous.

You see, my body may not age here, but my mind continues to accrue memories as though it were experiencing time normally, and I was attempting to build a clock capable of tracking the age of my consciousness.

Problem is, the crystal I need for the oscillator of such a clock takes about eight months to synthesize, and that synthesis process requires that I pour a potion containing an ounce of my own blood onto a rare stone every day until the stone starts to crack, at which point the deep red crystal can finally be harvested.

I'm sure you can imagine that losing that crystal to a temporal implosion thanks to a misaligned gear was... upsetting.

And then it happened again. Eight months and way too much blood later, another temporal implosion. Did I mention that I quite dislike bleeding? This was not an enjoyable process for me. I wish I could say there was some complex, mysterious issue I had understandably failed to consider, but in reality I had grabbed the wrong spring during final assembly and the extra tension... well, poof.

Third time's the charm, right? Another excruciating eight months later, with overhauled schematics, the most perfectly tuned gears I had ever produced, and even a semi-organized workbench, I sat in front of my creation with the blood-red crystal in my hand. Slowly, carefully, I slid the crystal into its housing in the oscillator, and, pushing with an amount of pressure that made my heart pound even harder than before, I snapped it into place and winced.

"Tick. Tick. Tick."

I let out a sigh of relief. It worked. I wasn't surprised to learn that I'm 984 years old, though I also wouldn't have been surprised if I had turned out to be a few centuries younger or older than that — I haven't exactly kept track.

My heart filled with pride looking at my creation. Hearing the satisfying Tick. Tick. Knowing that I had built this thing with my own hands. I stared at the dark oak frame, the patinaed brass gears, the electrum hands and workings, and in the center, the blood-red crystal that had given me so much grief. This was, truly, an object of beauty.

Then I felt something else. A heavy realization. I have built something truly beautiful, and no other human will ever know about it. I'm usually happy absorbing myself into my work, the joy of creation — the space and freedom to create was all I ever really wanted anyway. But, for the first time in a long time, I felt sad to be alone. Sad that there is nobody with whom I can share this beauty.

I could tell that this loneliness was the reason the wood told me to write, but I wasn't sure why before. See, the forest's feelings become clearer the further I follow them, and I can feel now that someone is going to read this. I don't know who, or why, or where, or how, but I can feel that what I write here will be read by others.

That's a lot to process. I didn't know the wood was capable of something like this, and I'm not quite sure how I feel about it yet. I did enjoy writing this, though. I think I need to get some sleep now.

Read Part 2 Here!

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

21 Elaine💜 no specific response I'm looking for, just a conversation

I often find myself asking the question

"What is my center?" "Who am I?" If I were to meet myself in a different body, would I recognize them or I guess me?

I've never really been quite sure of who I was or how I fit into my own life. As a kid I believed so intensely in magic and friendship and love, I'd watch movies and dream about going on adventures or just being kind. I even use to talk to the oak trees at school because I thought they were lonely like I was. As I grew older though it kind of stopped, or became dormant. That wonder.

I got dragged into life like everyone eventually does: school, family, media trends. Wanting to fit in and at the very least be liked. I wasn't always as kind or understanding or even good as I'd hoped I was and while I do regret those times, the feeling's passed because I recognize I was literally an average middle schooler.

But now I guess I just feel lost. From a young age I became involved in something just horrible where I was manipulated on a sexual, emotional, and really just general level. I'd perform and consider this part of my life as normal albeit "bad", but at the time I equated that "bad" with the same feeling of getting scolded as a child.

"Yes mom I know it's not nice to kick the seat."

And eventually you'd end up kicking the seat again. I wasn't aware of just how dangerous it all was because there was no immediate to reaction of catastrophe when I first did it.

I was around 10 when it started, I'm now an adult and still reeling from it all. As I grew older I made horrible decisions and some that genuinely horrify me. On one hand I can say "I was manipulated and sexually abused for x amount of years and majority of bad things I did were under their influence and threat." But it'd not only be a lie, it'd be downright bullshit. I was smart and capable and I was kind, yet still I allowed myself to play into this world that I knew I had no future in. I made those bad decisions and I hurt those people.

When I tell friends and family that I don't always feel good, it's met with immediate defiance. My own therapist has reassured me that I'm kind and that I am not as bad as I make myself out to seem. But still a part of me can't believe it, I've even asked myself if my therapist is the right person to analyze me because what if they're wrong? That's how unbelievable it seems.

I don't know who I am or where I stand. I just know I want to be good. I want to be kind and trusted and I want to love and recieve it without guilt. But do I deserve to? Will my peace one day break? Will my past come back to my present and future? What will I do?

I still don't really believe I deserve the best that life can offer, I even gave up on my dream right when I had the means to achieve it because I genuinely don't believe I should succeed in a "amazing way."

I've lied, I've stolen and manipulated. I've sold myself and allowed others to abuse me. I've hurt and I've lashed out at. I've been naive and ignorant and so many more. And I'm just scared of not knowing what will happen other than, it will or already did.

I want no career, no fame, nothing of my name in anything. I just want peace, a decent home, and a real true fresh start, to be left alone for the rest of ever. I've even fantasized of erasing myself from the memories of everyone on earth or having a time machine to go back knowing what I do now. But I guess that's the wonder in me that still chooses to believe.

Hi Elaine,

I'm so sorry about what you've been going through.

It sounds like you're going through a really tough time right now, and it's completely understandable to feel lost and unsure of who you are after experiencing such traumatic events. It's important to remember that you are not defined by your past actions or experiences, and that you deserve to have a good life and be happy.

It's also important to recognize that healing and self-discovery is a process, and it may take time to find your center and figure out who you are. It's okay to take things one day at a time and focus on small steps towards healing and self-improvement. It's great that you know you want to be good, kind, and trusted. That's a great starting point for working on yourself and building a better future. Remember that it's never too late to make positive changes and improve your life.

It's understandable to feel scared about the future and what might happen, but it's important to try to focus on the present moment and what you can do to take care of yourself right now. You deserve to have peace and a fresh start, and it's possible to work towards that goal.

If you're struggling with feelings of guilt or self-doubt, it may be helpful to continue working with your therapist or seek out additional support from a mental health professional. They can help you work through these difficult emotions and provide guidance and support as you navigate your healing journey.

Remember, you are not alone, and it's okay to ask for help when you need it. You deserve to have a happy and fulfilling life, and with time and effort, you can work towards building the life you want.

I hope I could help, and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[surely-galena]

Hey Galena!

Just a lil something i've been thinking about: How did Vincent meet Marius?

They're like the same age so they had to have met at presumably school or somewhere but to go from classmates to working for Marius? There's a story here and we're not getting it.

What are your thoughts on this? (back again with increasing Galena's Marius posts)

Hi hi Rose!

I'm so sorry for the delayed response, the combination of me being busy + the time it took to think about the ask (because it's really interesting!) meant that I took much longer to answer than I normally would.

[WC: 0.9K]

Actually for some reason I had assumed Vincent was a little older than Marius (thus following the pattern of Marius being the boss of people older than him), but I looked Vincent up in the ToT wiki and there is no canonical age. And it's true, Vincent does look really young! He could honestly pass off as 19 if he really wanted to!

But: to be able to work for the von Hagens, one thing is clear: you have to be exceptional. And since Vincent has been working for Marius for what seems like a fairly long time now (since he's trusted to do NXX work), I'm guessing he's probably around 20-ish by now.

So that brings us all back to what you said: he's probably super close in age to Marius.

We know that Payton has been working for the von Hagens since he was in his 20's (Blizzardous Threads of Red), and so there's no reason to think that it's not the same with Marius.

But let's follow the timeline: Marius only returns to Stellis after the Giann incident, which means we can probably surmise that Vincent only started working for him around then (the exception being: Vincent worked for Giann before and was just sorta... transferred). This isn't a long time at all, it's actually about the same amount of time Marius has known Vyn (which hey, means he got introduced to Vyn and Vincent, the two... uh.. Vin's).

So this is possibility #1.

Marius needs a P.A., Vincent wants an internship/job/work experience at a nice company so he can get some good things to put on his CV. For various reasons we'll brush over, he arrives at Pax and that's when Marius meets him (possibly through a series of interviews where Marius and/or Austin search for a good P.A.).

These are the Personal Assistant Trials, or PAT, if you will, where Vincent eventually comes out as candidate number one.

This feels to me like a fairly logical thing that could happen, but I also want to explore the other possibilities that could have occurred -- I mean canon hasn't said anything, so until then I have lots of space to play around with!

Possibility #2: Meet Cute (but platonic)

So let's say the whole PAT thing never actually happened, or that it did happen but Marius wasn't satisfied with the applicants (because they were all insincere or not the right fit or something).

Let's say Marius is still searching for the perfect assistant and Vincent, a fellow college student, is looking for a part time job to pay the bills. Maybe something happens where Vincent demonstrates his Highly Capable Skills and Marius decides to offer him an interview.

Like: it's 2 in the morning and Marius and Vincent end up being the only students left in the library, Marius because he really needs to finish an essay that was actually due at midnight and Vincent is there for... whatever.

Marius is absolutely exhausted, he's had a long day with classes and dealing with Pax and other people, and then he glances over at Vincent, who for some reason is still going strong. Like, he's typing on a computer with one hand and photocopying a textbook chapter in the other, and in the extra seconds where he doesn't need to hold down the textbook, he's crossing off various things on his to-do list.

Marius leans over and sees one of the things on the to-do list is a bit less easy to check off, like get a job or go to an interview, and his 2 am brain puts two and two together. He fumbles around for his business card and takes that leap of faith.

Possibility #3: They knew each other from the start

Okay, last scenario for now.

Actually, this one is where I try to explain why exactly Marius trusts Vincent so much, and it's if they had already met. Like, maybe Vincent was one of the good kids at school, like not just a good kid in the academic sense, but actually good to him. Maybe it went like this: Vincent never tried to take advantage of him, Vincent always smiled at him in the hallway, Vincent always offered him a juice box when he brought extra.

And so as they grow up and go their separate ways: with Marius taken out of school after the freezer incident and then later going off to Florence to pursue art, and Vincent doing... whatever Vincent does. (Accounting? Economics?) And when Marius returns to Stellis, now in need of someone he can count on, and he thinks of that one smart, quiet kid in class who had always been nice to him. He tracks him down eventually and they catch up, exchanging general how have you been's and what have you been up to's. Vincent admits that he's been looking for a job now, but hasn't had any luck since he's got virtually nothing on his CV. And something clicks in Marius' mind as he realizes there is a way they can both get what they want.

So yeah! I'm sure there are loads of other possibilities as to how they met, but this is what I have for now. Marius and Vincent's friendship is pretty subtle and lowkey in canon, but I genuinely think that they both care for each other in some way -- especially, again, if Marius trusts him enough with NXX work. Now that I think of it, we totally should have more Marius & Vincent content that isn't just "hey Vincent look at this database for me" / "okay cool be back in five".

Thanks for stopping by Rose!! I had a lot of fun with this ask :D

[celestiababie]

If you have time Uhm… dom hyuka? Including praise/degrading with the size kink stuff would be Uhm cool 👉👈. Also do you write omegaverse stuff? I like to write a little but it just never comes out how I want it.

D-dom Kai? Looks around- AM I EVEN CAPABLE TO WRITING SUCH A THING? THERE'S PEOPLE WHO SEE THAT GIANT PENGUIN BOY AS A DOM? Okay I'm gonna do some serious thinking. Also, I don't mind writing omegaverse stuff as long as there's no mpreg involved :D ALSO HE LOOKS FUCKING FIRE IN THESE PICS AHH

• Okay give me a few seconds to process that people actually think Kai is capable of domming

• The idea of Kai, your sweet, cuddly, loveable, boyfriend getting rough with you was one that crossed your mind often

• Often enough that you told Kai about it and had even asked him if there was anything he'd like to try

• Kai was taken aback- he never knew you saw him in that kind of light. He didn't know if he had it in him to be anything other than gentle with you

• Well- he supposed that wasn't entirely true

• There was always something he wanted to try but he was just too nervous to ask. He didn't want you to think he was weird, or a bad boyfriend for wanting such a thing

• Kai seemed to have this infatuation with your neck and he already knew how much you loved his hands- so it wasn't his fault that his mind would wonder and think about how pretty your neck would look with his fingers wrapped around it

• You noticed your boyfriend lost in thought and snapped your fingers in front of him to regain his attention. "Hyuka? I asked if there was anything you wanted to try..."

• He visibly contemplated telling you, he didn't want to seem like a sadistic weirdo but since you did say you fantasized about him being rough with you...it should be okay, right?

• You tried to hold back your surprise and arousal when your boyfriend said he wanted to try choking. But just the thought made your body flush with heat. You bit down on your bottom lip and subconsciously began to run your hands down his shoulders and arms.

• "Choke me? Or me choking you?"

•"I want to try choking you...if that's okay- I totally understand if it's not and we can just pretend like I didn't say anything haha...I'm sorry if I made you uncomf—"

• You quickly cut him off with a lustful kiss before he could continue his apology.

• " I want you to, please," you mumbled against his lips in need

• Even though Kai wanted to, there were a few things that needed to be discussed for safety reasons. He didn't actually want to hurt you and the two of you created a system that eased his mind.

• If you could speak, your safe word would be 'red'. If you couldn't speak, you'd tap him three times. If he felt like it was too dangerous and you were drifting off, he would stop all together

• The two of you spent a generous amount of time researching proper technique before you turned to Kai with a pout

• "Kai, I trust you more than anything and I really appreciate how cautious and careful you want to be, but it's getting kind of uncomfortable being this wet and not doing anything about it"

• Kai's eyes darkened considerably- something you definitely weren't used to seeing. "Can you really not wait, baby? I don't want to hurt you."

• With a hefty sigh, you plopped backwards, your back hitting the bed as you glared up at the ceiling. " You always baby me. I'm not made out of glass. Sometimes I want to be thrown around by you, you're so much bigger than me and I want you to take advantage of that."

• You weren't sure what you had expected when those words came out of your mouth- but if someone would have told you that your normally cute and docile boyfriend would have his fingers pressing against the sides of your neck as he rammed his cock into you so brutally until a noticable bulge could be seen from your stomach- you'd probably would have laughed in their face

• Kai cooed at the sight of your glossed over eyes and moved the hand that wasn't on your neck to wipe the tears leaking out the corner of your eyes

• "You shouldn't be crying, sweetheart. I always treat you so well, but you just want to be treated like a slut, hm? What happened to wanting me to manhandle you? Can't take it, baby?"

• Even Kai himself had no idea where his sinful words came from. It's as if your confession had unlocked a new side of himself he kept on a leash for your sake. But maybe he would let it out if it got you this wet with your eyes rolling back into your skull from pure pleasure

• You tapped his bicep three times when the pressure on your got too much and he immediately let go of your neck

• He pressed kisses to your forehead as he continued to fuck his cock into you, mumbling praises against your skin that made you tear up due to being so overwhelmed

• "You're so good for me, baby— I didn't expect you to last that long with my hand on your pretty neck. You're taking me so well, baby. So so well."

• Your hand shook as it grabbed ahold of his to place it back onto your neck. He knew what you wanted and could tell how close you were from the vice grip around his length. He began to roll his hips against you, the tip of his cock rubbing against your sweet spot continuously

• You couldn't hold it anymore, the pressure of his hand on your neck and the continuous stimulation was too much to handle. An unfamiliar pressure began to build in your stomach but before you could ask Kai to stop, your climax hit you harder than it ever had in your life

• Your body shook uncontrollably and your fingernails dragged down Kai's back as your orgasm gushed out of you

• When you finally came down from your overwhelming high, you couldn't help but notice the warm wet feeling from underneath you and the fact your boyfriend was staring at you with utter shock

• "D-did I make you do that?"

• You giggled to yourself and leaned up to kiss him on the lips.

• Only your boyfriend could be so adorable after fucking your brains out

[freakygirlie]

Hi. Itk here. Believe me, don't, doesn't matter. Thought I'd drop (after you summoned ha) by given the chaos and try to enlighten the ones who choose to believe me, as much as I'm capable of.

The first thing I wanna say is: stop trying to figure out their relationship. You most likely never will. Fans are stuck on both extremes, when the actuality of it is far more in the middle (perhaps even up or down and all around ha). It's complex and strange and not at all "normal" (as normal as they could be, anyways).

It's not as simple as "oh they're just a closeted couple who engage in bearding and have kids and behind closed doors they're just a regular, old married couple and a big, happy rainbow family".

Doesn't sound like itk info, believe me, I get that but observing the fandom I'd say it almost is because most fans simply hang on extreme simplistic ideas of what their relationship is.

Second thing I'd like to say and unfortunately seems like it's not at all obvious but: do not believe anything they share publicly. Not saying they're lying compulsively, but they are public figures and they have a lot at stake to just casually drop the actual truth of any given situation.

Just don't. The same salt you have regarding itks, have towards them. It'd do you some good...Believe me. Unless you are involved in the entertainment or political life, you cannot even begin to fathom what it's really like, the level of manipulation, falsehood and well, overall deviation of it. It's quite disturbing tbh. So just always take whatever's said and shown with a good amount of salt. With public people hardly anything is accidental or casual.

I think the most prominent question now is...Why? Why would they do something like that? Regardless if you have the ingenuity to believe the little scene they made or not...Still, the question lingers.

With my level of "in the knowness" I cannot for sure say the real reason, yet from the pieces I've collected so far, seems to be a multiple gain scheme. It was a high risk, they were well aware, and it paid out in the way they were expecting, minus small bumps here and there. But overall it seemed to have worked in their favor. How in the hell, one would ask?

Believe me, I used my best sneaky capabilities to find out exactly why but they were smart enough to keep this one locked tight, minus a few loose lips. And from those all I've heard was that "whatever the purpose was, it worked out".

As weird as it may sound to the innocent mind, it's actually not at all, given that even leaked nudes are not at all leaked or accidental, and those tend to (at least in the past) get immense amount of backlash. It's not the first time famous folks fake a fight, surely won't be the last.

A lot goes into public image, it's not black and white as "well but it looked bad on Jensen", "it looked bad on the prequel", etc. You'd be surprised as how little this truly matters given the level of manipulation they are able to pull on the public. And well, even with them...It happens all the time. Both made mistakes far worse than just "not telling my bestie about my new project" and fans would eventually let that go and put them back on the pedestal.

So just remember, always: not in the industry? then don't judge anything because you simply do not understand how it works.

Another piece of itk information I can give besides "this was planned and it worked" is: they are fine. From what I've heard they are not fighting over it or going through anything more dramatic than what they usually have been going through ever since they met haha.

So just sit back and chill out. Breathe, read fanfiction and remember that we will never truly get answers, because even what comes out of their mouths are most of the time carefully thought out and directed to have a specific meaning and effect (why do you think Jared mumbles and rambles so much?).

Another interesting piece of itk: you know how they always say they never fight? Even though that sounds insanely hard to believe even if they were just friends because who knows someone for that long and is constantly together and never fights? Unlikely, right? Yes, as obvious as that was. But unfortunately a lot of you seem to believe that, given the level of shock you had for this little twitter feud (as fake as it was). Yeah. They fight. A lot.

They fight as much as individuals in their situation would. Like I said, not at all what most people absentmindedly seem to think it is. They go through a lot. Way more than anyone who isn't in a similar situation would understand. It's messy, although they try their best to make it simpler in the ways they can.

On top of being in a very complex situation, they both have strong personalities and one of them is quite hard to "pin down". So altercations happen a lot, but they know how to deal, and they are exceptionally good at making sure that doesn't interfere in their work (oh well, at least not any work that doesn't benefit from intense emotional exchanges, anyways 😉...chemistry isn't something random, you know? haha).

I find it quite...interesting (to put it nicely) that a lot of hats easily believe they are a couple that lies constantly about almost every aspect of their lives, yet, they cannot believe they would fake a social media narrative. It makes no sense whatsoever.

It'd do you all good to be a little less tendentious and look at them as, you know...Humans? They are not what they seem to be, just as you guys also take in different versions of yourselves in different situations, they do too. And don't be so hopelessly naive to actually believe they see fans as "hashtag family". This is their work. And as grateful as they are for supporters, they certainly do not consider them family. To the point of never lying and trusting you with their life.

I'm sure they love their fans, but come on, saying they would never lie because that's mean to fans is just beyond naive. They've been doing it all along and oh, another interesting info? They don't think they're doing anything wrong.

Yeah, sounds weird, you'd think they'd feel guilty. But again, unless you were media trained, you'd never get it.

From years now if there's one consistent info I've gotten was this: they don't feel obligated to tell you anything. They believe they are doing "what they are supposed to do, the right thing for everyone involved".

So. Yeah. And hell, they are right about not being obligated to say anything about anything, I guess.

Well, I hope that was helpful or at least entertaining. It's hard to share info without accidentally making it obvious who I am for the lurkers (sure you guys were well aware that they lurk around the fandom). But it's safe because as long as I don't provide evidence, I'm fine. Just walking a thin line between sharing and not sharing something too specific that would be easy fir them to know who has that info and although they can't do anything against itks, they can manage to cut us off somehow and I enjoy having access lol, so that'd be a bummer.

Anyways, take itks and J2 themselves with a ton of salt haha! You are lovely, btw, you seem very kind and I enjoy your blog very much! much love!

itk anon everything you said was <333 and i agree with like almost all of it. very nice analysis and ask thank you ! i don't always believe everything j2 put out but the whole stunt being a false narrative just seems wrong so idk what to make of it. regardless i myself can sometimes get carried away in my star-struck love of j2. and i am a tinhat so well :) and now they look to be really good and taking a break from here was well worth it <3

''You are lovely, btw, you seem very kind and I enjoy your blog very much! much love!'' i love u so much hope u have a great day !

[lovethisletters]

The Bat & The Lantern || Batman x Reader

Hi, lovely! I had so much fun writing this (I'm not gonna lie, I was quite nervous at first, since I don't know that much about the whole green lantern universe, but guess it turned out...ok?) so I hope you enjoy it as much as I did and to be honest, I would like to revisit this story again in the future!

Little disclaimer: The reader is a Human green lantern but similar to star-lord she lived the majority of her life in space, that's why she's so oblivious as to whom Batman is, also this takes place during Dick Grayson early years as robin (12-13).

Word count: 2233!!!

Summary: Reader is a new member of the Justice League...but Batman doesn't seem too happy about it.

Keys: Y/S/N: Your Superhero Name | Y/N: Your (real) Name.

Hal Jordan was your friend since you joined the green lanterns (which it was barely 3 or 4 years ago)

Basically...you were "new"

But that didn't stop your fellow green lanterns (?) From seeing all your potential.

Everyone is convinced that with the right training and perseverance, you will become one of the greatest green lanterns of all time.

So, it didn't take long before you proved yourself to be capable enough to join the big leagues.

More specifically, The Justice League.

Hal was the one to introduce you to his companions.

The Amazonian, the human looking alien, the speedster, the other Alien not so human looking, the half robot; everyone was so nice to you since they met you.

Everyone except...The grumpy bat.

When you first introduced yourself, he didn't even bother to be as welcoming as the others.

He just stood there, looking all big and serious that you almost thought it was a statue or the poor guy had catatonic lapses or was way too shy or socially awkward to approach you.

You felt bad, so you approached him instead.

—Hi! I'm Y/S/N...—You said enthusiastically before being abruptly interrupted.

—I know, I heard your introduction already—His voice so devoid of any kind of emotion that you may as well had been talking to a machine.

"Scanning complete, Batman"

A voice inside his cowl informed him, it sounded like an older man with a British accent.

—Thank you, I'll check it later.

That’s when it hit you…the reason why he was watching you so intensely and standing so incredibly still: He was scanning you.

Fucking. Son. Of. A. Bitch.

You stayed there, your face paralyzed with surprise and anger, without knowing very well what to answer; you didn't want to cause a scene on your first day, but this man was just so rude; That is not an appropriate way to receive a new member. yes, it is normal to have suspicions, but you would appreciate if he had the decency to let his suspicions be known when you weren't present.

—she just introduced herself and already on with the paranoic behavior, Bats? seriously? —Hal stepped in your defense.

—this is a routine procedure; I'm just being cautious.

—He was like that at the beginning with all of us too, don’t worry he’ll warm up to you in no time—Wonder woman whispered in your ear after watching your uncomfortable expression.

Ultimatedly you decided to listen to the amazonian and let that one slide, “is normal to be wary of new things anyways” you repeated yourself.

As the months passed you have grown quite frustrated. Between all the missions and meetings even though you felt your relationship with the rest of the team grow closer and they began to trust you and respect you; your relationship with the Batman stayed pretty much the same.

Yes, there was a bit of progress….a bit.

He was bit more talkative to you, a bit more “friendly”, a bit more trusting.

But it was always just a bit never actually fully a teammate to you, your relationship felt more like distant coworkers.

At the beginning it didn’t worry you too much, until your lack of communication started to mess with your performance in the missions, sometimes something completely bizarre and unexpected would happen and because both of you didn’t know each other very well, the mission would take the double amount of time to resolve since you couldn’t coordinate at all.

One time he almost ran you over with his batwing…

The whole thing was kinda funny looking back on it but at the time you were furious (rightfully so)

In his defense, he didn’t knew you were there…I mean…you basically where standing in his parking spot (not that you knew there was such a thing, most members could fly or at least jump really high, so you kinda always forgot he couldn’t…and to be honest you didn’t know his exact powers)

—Sorry—was all he said as he got out of the strangely shaped flying vehicle and directed only one glance at you to make sure you where ok before entering the building, always maintaining that characteristic calm and cold demeanor.

One day you entered the hall of justice earlier than usual only to find an unexpected guest sitting in one of the empty chairs his gaze fixated on a book, he was wearing a rather colorful suit of some sort matching his green mask, then you realized when you were close enough…he was a C H I L D.

You panicked, why was a child here? Is he some sort of mini spy? How was he able to get through the security system?  Did he touch anything dangerous?

This and many more questions ran through your mind, the child noticed you were looking at him and only gave a polite nod as a greeting before returning his attention to his book.

Perhaps a school trip that you weren’t aware of was taking place and this kid strayed from his class? Perhaps he was looking for one of your teammates to ask for a photo and got lost and decided to wait here for his teacher? That will explain why everyone wasn’t here in the meetings room, perhaps they were busy giving the (hypothetical) group of children a tour?

—Hey kiddo! Are you lost? —you began the conversation in a friendly tone before kneeling down a little in order to appear less imposing…after all he was a child you didn’t wanna scare him.

He looked at you so incredulously.

You could almost hear him think “ma’am wtf are you doing???” through his expressions.

—What’s your name?

—Ummm…uh…Robin?­—He spoke like it was something obvious  while signaling the “R” symbol on his chest.

—Robin, uh? What a pretty name! tell me Robin…why are you here? Are you lost?

Poor boy he was so confused, you didn’t know who he was? Didn’t any of the members told you about him? And more importantly…Why where you talking to him like if he was a 5-year-old?

—No, ma’am…I’m just waiting for Batman.

“Batman? Was he a fan of Batman of all superheroes?”  It surprised you a bit, usually kids tend to like superman or wonder woman more since they are nicer and charismatic, and Batman was the opposite.

—Sorry Kiddo, I don’t think he’s one for photos, perhaps you could ask the others some other time! ­— you began explaining trying to dissuade the kid while guiding him towards the exit.

—He’s not here for photos—smooth as ever…the Bat was behind you.

—He’s my sidekick.

Your jaw dropped, a sidekick? He’s a CHILD! You knew superheroes had sidekicks, but you never knew they were that young!

Before you could even begin to protest, Batman ignored you, looking down at the child and instructing him to collect his things.

—Hurry, you’ll be late for class again. — He said before disappearing behind the door that led to his parking spot.

Robin quickly followed, hanging his backpack over his shoulder before stopping in his tracks directing an apologetic smile towards you and saying:

—Don’t worry miss, I can take care of myself! — He must have noticed the concern on your face before leaving.

Since that day your routine changed.

You would wake up earlier, many times you’ll be the first to arrive to the Hall of justice, and even have breakfast flying on your way there all for one thing: Robin.

Once you learned he was Batman’s sidekick you couldn’t help but worry over that poor child, “what if he gets hurt? Is he eating/sleeping/resting properly?” you just couldn’t help yourself.

At first it was just checking on the kid by just…seeing him in the morning and greeting him casually but there were times he wasn’t there, and you would panic internally and there was no other way to calm your anxiety until you would ask the Bat about the child.

He would always replay shortly: “He’s at home” “He’s at school” “He’s busy” and your conversations always would end there.

One day that Robin was there however, instead of your usual ‘greeting nod’ he started talking to you.

He asked you all sorts of things (that weren’t compromising to your real identity ofc) “What’s your favorite color?” “What music do you like?” “What’s your favorite movie?”

And it started from there.

The conversations with Robin grew not only more frequent but also more personal (as personal as someone with a superhero lifestyle can be), to the point it had become a routine for you to come early and talk to the boy, sometimes you had breakfast together or even helped him with his homework before the Bat would take him to school.

Perhaps it was because you didn’t have many acquittances here on earth, but Robin became family to you.

And family takes care of each other.

It had been a rather difficult and spontaneous mission; Lex Luthor was starting to act a little bit fishy (more than usual) using his connections and money Luthor had been acquiring/robbing very specifically concerning items all over the US, his next objectives: a Radion sample being investigated in a secret laboratory in Star city and a Dionesium sample...contained in the Wayne tower laboratories...

The team decided to split to put a stop to Luthor’s minions and his plan.

The Bat insisted the rest of the team should go to Star city, telling them that he and Robin could handle it, but everyone was immediately against it: Luthor had already collected relatively powerful items and being the intelligent motherfucker he is, probably transformed some of those items to give to his goon’s so they might have a chance in harming any of the members if they were to interfere.

Ultimately, the team agreed you and cyborg would accompany them to Wayne Tower.

Robin was stoked, he would get the opportunity to fight alongside you! But Batman…not so much…he kept trying to lose the two of you on the way there; fortunately, cyborg put a tracker on the batwing, he wasn’t going to get rid of you that easy.

Upon your arrival, you could spot several men (armed like if they were military but with a much more upgraded equipment) already leaving the building, carrying two tanks (presumably full of that substance Martian Manhunter had mentioned before) and heading to a truck without any plates.

Long story short: you organized a plan as quickly as you could but…something went wrong…Cyborg and Robin were supposed to create a distraction while the two of you recovered the tanks without damaging them, since the properties of the substance within remained unknown.

But something went wrong: You and Batman failed to coordinate and so you were spotted by the henchmen, they started aiming their weapons at the two of you, initially you thought a force field generated by the power of your ring would be enough...oh no, honey, you’re so wrong.

Sonic weapons were able to not only break your concentration quickly, but also made your ears bleed! One after another you kept re-making the fields, but the sonic waves so deathly and loud just kept coming.

You don’t know how but you were able to stand your ground long enough to make cover not only for Batman and allow him to get the tanks back safely but also for the rest of your team and give them a slight advantage to take down as many of Luthor’s minions as they could.

And then…you passed out.

You woke up at the infirmary in Justice Hall, your head a mess and wrapped in bandages, you had broken your arm because that shit inside a cast too for some reason…and…your ring was gone!

Panic!

No, never mind it was on the nightstand next to the chair in which batman was sitting on.

WAIT…next to the chair in which batman was sitting on?!?!?!

—How are you feeling? — you didn’t know if it was him suddenly talking or the genuine concern on his voice that startle you, so you just nodded slightly while he approached you.

—Can you hear me properly? —Surprisingly you could, but you still were a bit taken aback by his presence.

—I…­—Before responding your brain reminded you of the fact that you didn’t had your ring on, hence your secret identity was revealed to Batman. Your hands practically flew to your face in embarrassment. You didn’t know why but without your mask you felt naked and vulnerable.

He noticed.

His gaze studying your pained expression before he let out a small sigh.

—I came here…to thank you…and apologize— hesitantly his hands moved to the back of his cowl.

—You not only put yourself in danger for Cyborg and Robin, but you also concerned yourself with my safety even when it was probably my fault that we ended up in that situation —He admitted pressing a hidden button loosing up his cowl before finally taking it off and reviling the most gorgeous man you’ve had ever lay your eyes on.

—And for that I thank you and apologize…sincerely—Such sudden action left you speechless for a while, Batman not only had thanked you and apologized, but he had entrusted his identity to you.

—I think-…I think we started with the wrong foot; you know? —You finally were able to respond, breaking the silence that filled the room and surprising him slightly by your sudden declaration.

—Let’s start again…Hi! I’m Y/N—You imitated the same friendly voice tone you first used to talk to him.

The lips on the man in front of you curved forming a subtle almost imperceptive grin.

—Hello, Y/N, I’m Bruce…Bruce Wayne.

 ♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤

 WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! IT. TOOK. SO. LONG. Sorry :c

I had a bunch of ideas for this request but ended up going with this one since I wanted to expand on their beginning, I’m still trying to figure out a way to write Bruce and this was my first attempt, so…sorry if it was…bad :c I’ll try harder next time!!!

Any errors you might see, please let me know; English is not my first language so I’m trying to improve.

In the final scene I wanted Bruce to show he recognized the Reader as an equal so that’s why he took it off…still I felt like it could improve.

 ♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤

I will forever thank you if you go check out my other profile: @aileysmirnov​ where I post things about my OC: edits, one-shots, imagines, art, etc. If you like Greek mythology and the bat family maybe you would get to be a little bit fond of her as much as I am!

Anyway! Thank you for reading!

[just-messing-around]

How people seemingly view mukbangs: We come to watch attractive people consume very large amounts of unhealthy foods, sometimes we want them to eat very sloppily and messily.

Me: I thought that they originally where meant to be videos where the viewers watch a video of a person eating a meal and talking to the camera to simulate a social meal when they can't eat with their friends or family or something?!

If I had a 'mukbang' channel, it would just be normal meals. Like?

'I'm not gonna eat so much that my stomach hurts. The point of my videos is to encourage me to cook meals for the videos instead of grabbing quick, unhealthy things, to hopefully improve my health and eating habits, and to attempt to give people who can't eat meals with their friends or family a less...lonely experience? So let's talk and eat ❤'

Talking = me talking to the camera and people putting things they want to say in the comments or something.

I wouldn't want to watch myself messily consume large amounts of food that would be stretching my stomach to its limits, so why would I think other people would want to see me do that?

Idk, maybe I could make 2 meals and put one of them in front of the camera, but still in view of the camera, so it could be like a 'pov' thing where it can look like the viewers are sitting at the table with me?

Wasn't that what those videos where originally supposed to be? Like 'people can't sit down and eat with their friends and family as much, so maybe this can simulate a social meal situation until they're capable to eating with their loved ones' or something?

But I couldn't really call it 'mukbang', because people would be expecting me to eat so much that my stomach rips in half or something. So maybe? I'd title my videos as something like?

'Let's eat', then insert the topic I'd be talking about?

'Let's eat; my day', 'Let's eat; I've been going to the gym', 'Let's eat; I have art block', things like that?

Maybe I wouldn't get a lot of clicks or subscribers, therefore, not be able to make money, but if I was simply doing it as a hobby or something, it wouldn't matter, right?

Plus, when I die, my loved ones would be able to go to my old channel and watch them to feel somewhat close to me when I'm gone, right? O_O; 😬

But I'd probably never do it, because I most likely wouldn't want to put my face on the internet like that in fear that shít I did in the past would be brought up.

'Oh, my ex girlfriend is getting popular (if I became popular)? I have negative feelings for her now, so let me tell you about how she used to be several years ago.'

'Oh, this girl? Let me tell you about that one time when she kicked the shít out of her bully on the playground when she was about 8 or 9.'

'Oh, yeah, her. Wanna know about a crazy melt down she went through at school when she was younger?'

'Oh, hey, my ex. I'M GONNA POST NÜDES OF HER THAT I CONVINCED HER TO SEND ME BACK WHEN SHE TRUSTED ME!' JFC, those kinds of people are such DOÜCHBAGS and I hope I never experience that shít!!

Anyways-

I would constantly have anxiety that things I've done in the past, but learned and grew from would come back and be used against me and people would think that I was still the same person from the old stories. But it's not like I could give people the 'let's have a happy meal together' experience while wearing a mask or something, so what would I do?

Uhg, the idea of becoming popular or even famous is so fücking anxiety inducing. I don't understand how people could crave fame when literally everyone has done bad things in their past that could be used to get people to bully or harass them or something.

I just wish I could provide people with the feelings mukbangs where meant to provide without having to reveal my face and constantly fear drama, bullying, harassment, ect. Because I can't watch mukbangs without seeing huge amounts of food and getting nauseous from the thought of what it would feel like to put all of that in my stomach.

I have never finished a mukbang video because of that.

[starshiningsirius]

As fragile as a flower (Yandere Lilia x reader)

Thank you to @megan-is-mia for the scenario idea!

It stung so, so badly. The scream released expressed the pain from the person who had been hurt. The pain subsided somewhat, unlike the smell of burning flesh that never went away.

The fae chuckled in amusement at the girl's pain. Having warned her subtly, but not entirely of the effects the collar he placed on her would cause, every time she would try to escape.

"Dearest do be a good little one and stop trying, though I won't stop you it only hurts me far worse when you get hurt."

"You liar! if that was the truth then you wouldn't have placed this crap on me!" She yelled but it was shortly accompanied by coughs a great many like she was getting sicker and more frail by the moment.

Lilia walked over to her worry brought with his approach trying to use a spell that would temporarily heal her of her ailment. Since she didn't trust him with a potion or the medicine. As soon as he lifted his hand though she smacked it away.

"I'd rather die than be stuck here with an obsessive sadist." Was her response to the action she took causing the fae to sigh.

"Remind me again who was it that got herself here in the first place, you were so ignorant and without my help you wouldn't be here. It's not my fault your so delicate my dear. I only wish for your well being and in turn you could at least show a bit of gratitude." He said with a frown or maybe a pout. It actually made him look innocent as an angel.

What a goddamn lie.

* * *

Where had it all began?

Let's see all the way back at NRC it was just another normal day. Silver and Lilia were having tea with one another while discussing the day that had passed.

Silver happened to mention a girl he had saw in the infirmary. She was coughing very much like she was dying for air. He was about to get the school nurse but she stopped him.

"Wait, I'm fine they know already!" Was something along the lines of what she said.

Lilia was always curious and someone so weak and frail at this school just threw him for a loop. He wanted to go see the sickly one for himself.

He did find her back in the infirmary at lunchtime coughing yet again. He had scared the living daylights out of her when he teleported close.

"Sorry to startle you young one I can't help but wonder how someone like you could survive in a school like this?"

The question unnerved her to say the least as he pushed some of her hair behind her ear. The fae whipped out a charming smile as he had recalled to introduce himself.

"Ah, where are my manners? Lilia, Lilia Vanrouge. Pleasure to meet you my dear."

Though there first encounter was a bit unnerving they managed to get along for the most part. He'd scare her with his sudden appearances of course he found fun in seeing her scared. He'd also guide her to the infirmary during lunch to keep her on track to get some medcine.

They were good friends for the most part. Except for the fact that overtime Lilia just hadn't realized how much protection his friend had needed. How fragile she truly was until an incident had opened his eyes to what he had been missing.

That was when things really went south. She didn't arrive to their tea party after waiting 10 minutes. He knew for a fact her medicinal doses were at noon every day. This tea party was after class and she'd text him if she was going to be late. She didn't have any club activities either since Silver and Sebek both in the Equestrian club with her were with Malleus today. He already knows how Riddle gets when missing a member.

So where could she be?

It was nothing for him to teleport in the school and move about at visible incomprehensible speeds to find her. Of course he stopped when he heard laughter. The type of laughter of someone who had gotten away with a scheme. Peaking around the corner of the empty corridor he found the source of the laughter.

Savanaclaw students.

Someone was lying on the floor as well. He only just noticed them. When he finally realized who it was, it was like his soul left his body and consciousness slipped away.

He hated it, more than anything. He just had to take the anger he felt out on something. They were the cause of this and they would pay the price. Before he realized it they were dead, all of them. He had left their bodies there for someone else to find. It's not like the paintings saw him and there weren't any cameras in that hall anyway.

The thing no, person in his arms was who he was most worried about right now was far more important. Lilia couldn't even comprehend what he was feeling at the time. The sheer amount of worry and the increasing of his heartbeat, he didn't have time to think about it all.

He brought her back to the Diasomnia Lounge with a snap of his fingers leaving the violent, bloody, backdrop of the hallway behind. He placed her on the couch gently. Finally using his magic to the best of his ability to heal her.

He finally took a chance to breath after making sure her heart was still beating. She was still unconscious though. His heart was still pounding and he took a moment to reflect.

This wasn't like him at all. A lowly human protected by a powerful fae. As much anger as he showed but actually couldn't remember very well. He had lost it just after seeing her like that.

How ironic that someone as old and powerful as himself felt love toward someone so youthful and fragile as a flower. Her entire being in a school like this wasn't meant to be. He had come to wonder how she even got here.

Why someone as delicate and fragile as her would be placed in a school full of villainy?

* * *

That same event had flashed through his eyes at that moment in time. The bruised state she was in.

He couldn't help his sudden desire. To protect one of the few things he holds precious. This is different than Malleus, Silver, or Sebek. They're fully capable of protecting themselves. But her if he hadn't been there she would have probably died. It's only better if she stays in the castle where he can keep an eye on her.

He had a smirk on his face as he caressed the cheek of the girl he had fallen for. Eagerly casting the spell that would heal her momentarily.

He knew a spell that could heal her ailment completely but that would ruin the fragile image he had made of her in his head. After admiring the adorable glare she sent him for a second he finally opened his mouth to speak.

"Oh love as fragile as a flower you are. Certainly you don't belong at a school like that. I'll protect you from all the harm this world offers including yourself."

Masterlist

[namjooningelsewhere]

The Prince Charming!!

Pairing : Yoongi x reader

Genre: 18+

Warnings: Absolutely nothing!!!!

Summary- You are forced to attend a prestigious homecoming ball which you wanted to avoid but also which you couldn't, you didn't make in any plans on avoiding until you actually meet someone interesting and suddenly everything just seems perfect. Comfortably perfect!

The big thingies weren't quite your scene, specially when all you had to do was look like a freaking doll and stand in poise and behave and watch what you said. Naah please you were done with it.

And today happened to be exactly that kind of day. It was ball at the most affluent family of the city, The Mins. Seems like the so called prince charming had returned to his kingdom after a sabbatical and to celebrate the return his parents had hosted a ball, actually quite grand one at that.

You never wanted to go home because you knew your mother would be waiting with her battalion of stylists, beauticians to make you look like a diva, which obviously you were not. You had features that were standing out but you thought you needed to shine from within to shine on the outside.

You crept inside your own house like a thief tiptoeing to avoid any noise that would attract the attention of your mother. "Rebeca where you think you are going?" Your mothers voice boomed through the corridor. She was your mother alright.

"Give me one good reason why you haven't tried the dresses I've sent to your room? One good reason why you haven't pushed it for the fittings yet?" Umm maybe i came just now, Maybe i was busy trying to prepare for a interview that can get me something real?" You scoffed.

"Very funny, now go to your room and try the dresses and show it to me?" She said. I walked slowly to my room displaying ample amount of disinterest. "Faster now woman, The balls in the evening not tomorrow" you heard your voice once again. How does she know everything? You still couldn't uncover this mystery, You checked if hallways had cameras but nope nothing nada.

You try a lot of dresses but a red one catches your eyes. You try the red one it fit you beautifully amplifying every curve at your body and with a thigh high slits making it look picture perfect. Which also made you look perfect for the gram;).

You finished with a little bit of makeup and a shimmery nude gloss which made your lips look even prettier. You arrived at the ball with your parents and it looked it was more of a met gala type event.

As you walked to the hall you could see girls in all kinds of designers making it a high society designer store, looks like the so called prince charming had a lot of options to choose from.

You were greeted by a cheerful greeting and you grinned by the ear, you knew who it was. Hobi your bestfriend waving right back to him. You gave him a friendly hug, and he gasped for a second "Look at you gorgeous, looking enchanting!! He chimed.

Oh boy didn't have much of a choice you see! You exclaimed. The event turned out to be extremely boring with occasional dances here and there. All everyone was doing was to try finding the guy in question.

You moved to the hallway to use the powder room all you could hear was the gossips about the prince charming, "Where is he ?" I've heard he's hot!! Imagine how will he be?" You were absolutely disinterested in the prince charming and the only reason you had your ass in the room was your mother. That woman was capable of throwing you out of the window if you didn't do what she said. She was someone you would never mess with.

You scanned the room for Hobi, this guy was nowhere to be seen. And somehow you exactly knew where he would be at this moment. You fumbled for the phone but let him just be, At least he was having fun.

The ball was going in full swing yet there was no sign of the prince charming, wishing that man would appear somewhere and this ball would end, so you looked at the exit so that you could have a breath fresh air, you found a exit to a open space down towards the parking.

You moved ahead and went near the garden, and just spread your hands the air felt cold and specially it felt even cold with the strapless dress you had on. "Bored already?" You jumped at the voice behind you.

You turned behind to see a man, a magnificent man. Dark hair on his forehead dressed sharp a tux and those rings in the fingers was the highlight and his sly smile made me loose my breath for a second. Who was this you thought to yourself.

"A lot actually, but I don't seem to have a choice" You sighed. "And why would that be?" He asked. "You friends with the Mins?" You asked in a cautious tone. No he said. "Just that I find such events exhausting not to forget my mother bought me here all dolled up because she thinks I might find a good match and that's downright stupid. You exclaimed.

You could clearly say he was amused. He chuckled and that made you zone out to a parallel universe. "Oh I forgot I didn't get your name?" I didn't give it out yet you chuckled. Rebecca you replied stretching your hand in forward to a handshake.

"Lovely name" he said. Before you could say anything out heard footsteps approaching and next thing you knew he pulled you by the hand and started running towards what looked like a lake house.

I'm sorry people would have misinterpreted and this is a small group of the people here you know, they talk he explained awkwardness quite evident in his voice. "I can understand all these people do is talk. And I'm the last one to be involved. I have a quite fierce of a mother who will not tolerate any such nonsense of this sort" he laughed at my exasperated comment.

"Did someone tell you are dramatic?" He chuckled. "Yeah but then i told them not to mention it again" you laughed. "What are you doing here? Friend of the prince charming?" You asked curiosity taking over you.

"Prince charming?" He asked amused. " Yeah since he has a gazillion girls here who are here for him, must be a charmer I guess you say. He looks like he wanted to have a laughing fit, but didn't do so. "What if he was a charmer? I mean the guy has money, power, mostly looks and what if hes sexy too? Don't you find it appealing?"

"That's not what's all appealing, I mean i cant just doll up and compete for someone who i don't even know and besides my kind of love is more of a personality not the wallet or the pants or the looks. You argued.

"I'm starving!!" he says with a cute expression. Why don't you find something to eat inside I'm sure they have a plethora of options."I said "Nope food inside feels boring, Lets go out." You had your jaw open to the ground at his offer, How were you even supposed to leave this god damn place without your mother knowing.

You planned a hundred scenarios but nothing concrete came to your mind but some voice in your head asked you to throw caution to the wind and go with the tux guy. "Okay you said but there is one thing you have to do for me," You look at him innocently hoping he would agree. "Anything" He replied.

"Can you get me a pair of sneakers? I am going to have my feet cut off if i stay in these heels for one more min." He burst out laughing at your request, "This is the most unique thing someone has ever asked me to do", He chuckled.

He ushered you to the parking lot and opened a car boot to hand you over a pair of white sneakers and you unknowingly threw your heels in his boot. ?He closed it and pulled you towards his bike, You had your eyes out of your head for a minute. "Care for an adventure?" He smirked.

"Haven't you been noticing I'm wearing a gown all this time? You asked amused at this persons innocence. "Oh come on sneaker girl i know you can manage and for all you know this might be the most adventurous night of your life? Be a sport!"

You still could not believe you were doing this as you wore the helmet but it seemed thrilling and you thanked the designers to have kept the slit big enough to manage. The ride was filled with an adventure you have never tried before and most of it for the part that he was a complete stranger and still you felt the urge to trust him like it was inbuilt.

You decided to eat kimchi fried rice avoiding his amused looks for choosing something simple when you could have gone more for a gown and tux place but for what it was worth it turned out to be one of the best meals you and he had in a while. The time was passing by in mere fractions as you planned your last stop on a hilltop, starlit and quite a scenic view of the city.

The wind was blowing in your face calming all the excitement of the night it had really been an interesting one for sure. "did you dance at the ball?" He asked . "No why? You know its a shame that you are wearing such a beautiful dress meant to be to a ball but you didn't dance. I smiled at his thoughts believing that coming to this ball was a decision that was totally worth it. Even worth of getting myself killed by mother the moment i step inside the house. But it seemed worth it.

"Who said we cant change it?" he said. You were shocked when he played the song that was the most perfect fit for the night and pulled me in for a dance. You swayed in his arms like you belonged there and he danced as if you were some queen he was having a dance with. You moved as if it was just meant to be and in that moment strangely everything seemed perfect.

The ride back was just you and him discussing your and his interest and just normal things, just as normally as a night could have ended except he didn't let you go till you handed him your number. "Thanks for saving me from the ball and i had an amazing time really" you said unsure of his reaction.

"Likewise" He replied but with a peck on your cheek. He left you at the door bidding a goodbye. As you stood there in two minds, relishing your encounter of the stranger whose name you had forgotten to ask and second what was the lioness inside the house going to do with you?"

You Froze on your spot when you received a text message:

Sneaker girl, FYI I'm not a prince charming!!!

Something inside you told you this wasn't the last time you were meeting this prince charming.

[goldenmaybank]

meant to be

(not my gif)

pairing: jj maybank x reader

summary: y/n has been in love with her best friend, jj maybank, for years and now has to watch him fall in love with another girl, who is a kook.

warnings: swearing and slight angst (?)

word count: 4k (it’s a long one) 

a/n: hi! this is my first imagine and i hope you like it. i know it’s a long one i just got carried away :)

2 years. 730 days. 17520 hours. 1051200 minutes.

that's how long i've had to watch the guy i'm in love with be with another girl. two long years of seeing them kiss, hold hands, cuddle, go on dates and anniversaries. all because i was too scared to tell my best friend that i loved him.

two years ago

" yo, y/n ! y/n ! guess what just happened." my best friend since we were kids, jj, said as he ran up to me.

"what?"

"you remember that girl, shay, that i was telling you about? that kook that i met at the kegger last weekend with the long blonde hair, green eyes, slim waist, and fat as-"

"yes, yes. jj i remember." i said cutting him off from finishing his sentence.

"so, i just asked her out and guess what? she said yes!" he said with the biggest smile on his face.

"okay."

"okay? that's all i get? an okay? y/n, this is the hottest kook i’ve ever seen that we're talking about here."

"yeah and last week kate was the hottest kook and the week before that was penelope. this is nothing new j. it's just another pretty girl with big boobs and a nice ass that you'll mess around with for a few weeks maybe even days and then move onto the next girl."

"no y/n, this time is different. it feels different."

"mhm sure" i say not convinced

this is what jj does. he meets a cute kook girl or touron at one our parties, they hook up for a few days or weeks, and he moves onto to the next one. this was no different. however, in that moment, i didn't realize how serious he really was about her until it was too late.

few months after

jj and i were laying on john b’s couch watching movies like we always do every friday night. we've been doing this since we were little kids, usually the rest of the pogues would join us, but they’re all busy tonight. john b is with sarah, kie is working, and pope is helping out his dad. so that just leaves me and jj together.

"um, y/n?"

"hm?" i asked in response

"would you mind if i ended our movie night a little bit early?"

"why?"

"because shay just got off work early tonight and wants to hang out. she's been really busy lately, so we haven't gotten the chance to hang out as much. would you be okay if i left to go see her?”

"um, sure. i guess i can just rewatch friday the 13th again without you."

"really? you're the best! thanks." he said jumping up excitedly to put on his shoes and grab his hoodie, " i mean it's not like we haven't watched this a thousand times already, you'll be fine without me."

"i kinda wanted you here, but i guess she's more important" i mumbled under my breath

"huh?"

"n-nothing. uh, j can i ask you something before you go?"

"yeah sure, but it can't take too long shay is waiting for me."

"are you serious about her? like really serious?"

"yeah, i guess i am. i don't know i've never really felt this way about a girl before. she just makes me feel so happy and i always want to be around her and spend time with her. i usually just get bored with girls after a while and break up with them, but it's different with her. it's something about her i can't explain it." he said with admiration in his eyes.

that's when i knew it was too late. i could see the way his eyes lit up when i mentioned her and how he talked about her with such admiration. he was head over heels for this girl and who am i to step in and ruin it by telling him my feelings. he wouldn't reciprocate those feelings anyways she's the only girl he's felt like this about. i never had a chance against her. i will never be her.

after that day i didn’t see jj for three weeks. he cancelled every single one our plans because of her. “i cant go surfing today, shay wants to go get lunch” “can’t go fishing, shay needs me” “cant make it to the boneyard tonight, shay wants to have a movie night” he bailed on us, on me, all week because of her. the kook girl he just met a few months ago. 

finally, after countless begging and excuses jj came to hang out with us at john b’s house. we were all laying on the hammocks outside watching the sunset and for a minute it felt like everything was how it used to be even though i knew it wasn't. you could feel that everything was different especially between me and jj. he wasn't his usual flirty, touchy self with me and the tension in the air was thick. the rest of the pogues tried to act like everything was normal, but we all knew after today it would be another few weeks before we saw jj again. all he did was hang out with shay and he barely had any time for us anymore.

“so, jj since when did you start dating kooks?” john b snickered as jj punched his arm

“since when did you start dating at all?” pope replied

“i don’t know, man. it’s just different with her, i guess. i never thought i could be capable enough to have a relationship, but she changed that. she changed me.” 

kie looks at me with sympathy in her eyes. she was the only one who knew about my love for jj. i spent so many nights crying to her about my feelings for him and how i wish things could be different between us. it took a lot to get jj to open up to me, especially about his dad, and i always wanted to be the one he could go to for anything. i was the one who patched him up after a fight with rafe, i was the one who hugged him as he cried to me about his dad, i was the one who went along with his crazy ideas, i was one who did everything i could to get him to love me the way i love him. but i guess things don’t work out the way you want them to. i give kie and a nod and smile letting her know i’m okay. as long as jj is happy that’s all that matters to me. i would do anything to make him happy, even if it means i have to watch him fall in love with another girl.

present 

6 years. 2190 days. 52560 hours. 3153600 minutes.

that's how long the love of my life has been with his girlfriend. six long years of me trying to get over him and find someone else yet i could never get that boy with blonde hair and blue eyes out of my mind. he followed me everywhere i went even when i wasn't with him. he's everything i want in a guy yet i can't have him because he's not mine to have. he's someone else's and now i definitely can't do anything about it because they're getting married today.

today is their wedding and of course they invited me and the rest of the pogues. i debated even going and just letting kie give them my present with my pathetic excuse for why i wasn't there, but after talking to jj about the wedding the other day i couldn’t not go. "i could never have my wedding without you there, y/n. you're one of the most important people in my life." is what he told me. if i was strong i wouldn't care and still not go, but i'm not. all i had to do was look in his eyes when he told me that and i was puddy in his hands. there's no way i can't go and let him down like that. he means way too much to me to hurt him just to spare my own feelings. 

i walked into the venue looking around at the setup. of course the kook princess wanted a fairy-tale wedding. i sigh as i look at all the expensive decorations everywhere. i always imagined what my wedding with jj would be like. definitely wouldn’t look anything like this. even after years of all my hard work and schooling i still could never afford something like this. i always thought we’d have our ceremony by the beach since that’s where we first met when we were little kids and spent all our time together. it became our little safe space to get away from everyone and all our problems, and just be together. just me and jj. 

“gotta admit it looks beautiful.” pope says as kie hits his shoulder

“it’s okay, kie. he’s right, it is beautiful. more than i could've ever given him.”

“hey” kie says as she grabs my hand, “you sure you’re okay? because we can leave right now. trust me, i really don’t care to see the little princess wearing a dress that costs ten times the amount of my house.”

“it’s fine, kie. we have to be here for him. i’m just gonna go talk to jj quickly.”

“okay, i’ll save a seat for you.”

i went towards the back to find where jj is, so i could give him something before the ceremony started.

"knock knock." i say as i opened the door to jj’s room walking in to see him finishing getting ready.

"hey you. i almost thought you weren't gonna come."

"now why would i miss my best friend getting married to the girl of his dreams? i would never miss this no matter what"

"good because i know i would never be able to do this without you here."

"so.." i say as i sit down next to him, "how does it feel to finally be getting married?”

"it feels unreal. i never thought this day would come. and if it did, i honestly thought you would be the one standing at the end of the aisle"

"yeah, so did i" i say as i laugh weakly.

"i remember we had this whole thing planned out as kids. we were gonna get married on the beach, preferably the bahamas, but you know any beach would’ve worked for us. 

"and we were gonna have this huge reception and have our friends give sappy speeches talking about how we've been friends forever and despite the “no pogue on pogue macking” rule we still ended up together and got married." i added.

"and our honeymoon was gonna be in mykonos. we were gonna get a suite with a pool and relax all day and then turn up at night at the clubs there." he said as we both laughed.

"wow. we had a lot of plans when we were younger."

"we really did, but i guess none of them really worked out huh?"

"i guess not"

we sat in silence for a moment thoughts both roaming our minds about how we ended up here. best friends since we were little, spent all our time together, always acted like a couple, and yet here we are sitting in this room minutes before he gets married to a girl who isn't me, a kook nonetheless. it's now or never. do i let him know how i feel and finally have this weight lifted off my shoulders or just keep it to myself and let them be happy?

"uh, j? i- um, wrote this letter for you" i say as i take an envelope out of my purse, "it was the original speech that i wanted to tell you at the reception later but felt as though it wouldn't have been right to say, so i just wrote it for you to see. just, don't open it in front of shay, please."

"why can't you just tell me what's in the letter in your speech later?"

"because i would be a shit person if i say what's in that letter at your wedding reception in front of everyone."

"what's in the letter that's so bad?" he asked confusingly

"j-just read it when you're alone, okay?"

"no"

"no?"

"no. just tell me now what's in the letter."

"jj, i-i can't."

"yes you can. what's so bad that you can't tell me now?"

"i don't want to overstep my boundaries or ruin anything or make anything awkward, so just read it later when you're alone."

"no, y/n. tell me right now."

"jj, your wedding starts in a few minutes you need to finish getting ready. we don't have time for this."

"yes we do. i always have time for you."

"jj-"

"no. i'm not leaving this room until you tell me."

"j, don't be difficult."

"i'm not being difficult just read me the letter and this will all be done with"

i sighed, "oh my god fine. i'll read you the damn thing." i take a deep breath and begin to read the letter that might just change everything between us.

"dear jj, i'm not sure when exactly you'll be reading this, but i know when you do you'll be happily married to shay. so, congratulations best friend you're finally someone's husband. i honestly never thought this day would come; you were never one for relationships. always thought it was too much work to handle and you already had enough shit to deal with in your life. remember when we were little we made a promise that if neither of us were in a relationship by the time we were 30 we would get married. as silly as it was i always thought that would happen. that we would be the ones getting married and have our best friends write a speech for us. i'd always imagine kie writing mine and john b and pope would write yours, mainly pope though because we all know he’s way better with words than any of us ever were. but i never once in a million years would think i would be writing one for you and another girl. we've been through so many ups and downs and we still stuck together through it all. you're my best friend and i love you. words can't even describe how much i love you. jj, you've brought me so much happiness and never fail to put a smile on my face. even during my worst times you were always there to pick up the pieces and make me laugh. i never thought i would have someone in my life who means so much to me as much as you do. being around you immediately makes my day a hundred times better and i don't know what i would do without you in my life. my life would've probably been extremely boring and plain without you and your crazy adventures. your smile can make anyone's day better and you always make sure everyone else is happy even before yourself. and that's one of the many reasons why i'm in love with you. yes, i'm in love with you and have been for a while. this is more than a just as friends thing. i'm completely and utterly in love with you and that's never gonna change. and i know it took you a while to believe that someone could truly love and care for you, but i always have and always will. you so deserve so much than life has given you and i hope you know how amazing you really are. i’ve become such a better person because of you and you make me so incredibly happy. i'll never be able to repay you for everything you've done for me. i love you so much. i hope you're happy in your marriage and she treats you right, which i know she does. all i ever wanted was for you to be happy even if it wasn't with me. even though i just dropped this huge bomb on you, please don't let this affect our friendship. i will always be here for you no matter what. i love you, jj maybank."

there was complete silence. jj just sat there staring at the wall not saying a word.

"see this is exactly why i didn't want to tell you in person because i knew this would happen. i-"

"you love me?"

"yes, j i do."

"like actually love me?"

i sighed, "yes and i have for a while as i said in the letter"

"w-why didn't you tell me?"

"i don't know i was always so scared to and i thought you would never really find someone, so i had nothing to lose by not telling you. and then you started dating shay and i could tell you were really happy with her and by the time i realized you two were serious it was too late. i didn't want to step in and ruin anything or lose our friendship."

"you wouldn't have."

"what?"

"you wouldn't have ruined our friendship because i felt the same way. i still feel the same way." jj admitted

"you, what?"

"i love you y/n and as more than just friends. i have since freshmen year of high school when i first told you about my dad and you cleaned up all my cuts and held me in your arms all night. but i was just always too scared to say anything because i thought you were out of my league and i never really deserved you. the only reason i was with all those girls was to forget about you and get rid of my feelings for you, but they never did go away."

"i guess we're both stupid then. we always had these feelings for each other and just never said it."

"i guess so."

"so, what does this mean for us?"

"what do you mean?" jj asked

"i mean this obviously changes things, so what are we gonna do?"

"i don't see why things have to change. yeah we admitted we have these feelings, but that doesn't change anything."

"you're getting married, jj. in like twenty minutes there's gonna be another girl waiting at the end of that aisle for you to go there and give yourself completely to her. and i don't want to stand in the way of giving you and her that happiness you both deserve. me still being here is gonna change things because things are different now whether you want to believe it or not. these feelings are out there and they're still relevant. and i'm not gonna sit here and watch you two be happy and in love and be on the sidelines and feel like shit. i don't deserve that. i don't deserve to have my heart broken seeing you together knowing you have feelings for me and yet i can't do a damn thing about it. and it's not fair to her either to have another woman who you have feelings for sit there and get in the way of her happiness. i'm not gonna ruin this for her, jj. i won't. shay has been nothing but sweet to me and i'm not gonna do that to her. she doesn't deserve it and neither do i."

"so what do you want me to do then?"

"i want you to let me go."

"what? y/n, i love you. you can't tell me to do that"

"let me go, jj. as long as you sit here and tell me that you love me and have feelings for me, this will never end. and we will be going around in circles and i've been stepping on eggshells long enough for you and i'm done. you love her and she loves you, so be happy with her."

"but i love you too y/n and that's never gonna stop." he says with tears in his eyes.

"i know and i will always love you too, but i can't keep doing this. i can't watch you be with her and not be able to do anything. i can't be able to be alone with you knowing how you feel and not do anything to you. you don't know how badly i've just been wanting to kiss you after hearing you say those words to me. you don't know how bad i want this, but jj i can't do this" i say tears running down my face.

"i'll end it then. i'll cancel the wedding and we can be together."

"no. no, jj you can't do that. i'm not gonna ruin this. you've been with her for six years already, you've created this beautiful relationship and commitment to each other and i'm not just gonna ruin that. she's doesn't deserve that. you just need to let me go, jj. let me get over you because the more i'm around you the more the feelings grow. just let me find happiness within someone else.”

"so what? we're just gonna end our friendship? our years and years of friendship is over just like that? i don't want to lose you. if i cant have you in that way, even though i want to so badly, i still want you in my life as a friend."

"but i can't jj. i can't be around you. please, just let me go. let me get over you and find someone else. maybe one day if it's meant to be we'll find our way back to each other and maybe things can work out differently but for now just let me go." i say as my voice breaks

he sighed, "fine, i'll let you go, but only if you do one thing for me."

"what is it?"

"kiss me."

"w-what?"

"kiss me. i've been waiting years to tell you how i feel about you and finally be able to hold you and kiss you, so please just let me do it."

"jj, i don't know" i say hesitantly

"shay never has to know about this and once we kiss it's over. i'll let you go."

"if i kiss you, you'll let me go?"

"yes."

i sighed looking at jj. i actually got a good look of him right now in this moment. he looks so broken. dried tears streamed down his face, his eyes are puffy, and nose is red, but yet he still looks beautiful. no words can describe how jj looks. "cute" or "hot" never did this man justice. he was beautiful both inside and out and that's why i fell in love with him years ago. and as i started to lean it looking in his eyes all the memories we've made together came flashing through my mind all at once. this is really it. after this i'm actually leaving my best friend, who's the love of my life, to move on with my life.

moments later i felt his soft pink lips mold against mine. our lips moved in sync in such a way i have never felt with anyone else before. there was something about the way his lips moved against mine in such a passionate and loving way that i've never felt before. my stomach was immediately filled with butterflies and my mind went blank. all i could do was be in this moment with him. a few moments later it ended leaving both of us breathless. we stared at each other in awe not knowing a simple goodbye kiss would make us feel this way.

"wow. i've been waiting for this kiss for so long and i never knew it would feel like that." jj said

"neither did i.”

as much as i didn't want to, i knew what had to be done next. i stood up grabbing my bag and walked towards the door.

"so this is really it? you're just leaving now. after what we just felt in that kiss you're still gonna leave?" jj asked

"you know i have to."

"no, you don't have to. you want to, there's a difference. but it’s fine you’re just gonna leave just everyone else does, huh?”

don't turn back now. i know what he’s trying to do. he knows how the last thing i ever wanted to do was leave him like countless of other people in his life have done. but don’t let his words get to you. don't turn back now. the decision is already made. if i go back now i'll never leave and end up in the same cycle again.

i turn around one last time to look at my best friend, "i'm sorry. goodbye, jj."

that was the last time i saw jj.

after that i left the venue without saying anything to anyone. i got a ton of calls from kie, pope, and john b asking me where i was. i know they all eventually found out how i felt about him, which sometimes makes me wonder how he never knew, but then again i'm pretty sure they knew he had feelings for me too and i still never noticed. it's crazy how that happens. you could spend every moment of every day with someone and still be so oblivious to how they really feel about you. i guess i was just so caught up in my feelings for him i never noticed all the signs he showed of liking me back.

they always say what’s meant to be will be no matter how long it takes whether it's a day, a month, or a year. well i never really believed in that until now. years later after i walked out of that room, now stood face to face with the guy who was and still is my everything.

[thejustmaiden]

Jaken = Rin's Dad?

Okay, is this how a daughter treats their so-called father?

Most definitely not.

Rin and Jaken's relationship clearly screams of your typical sibling rivalry punctuated with cute and silly moments of playful bickering.

Yes, Jaken may technically be her main provider, but that doesn't necessarily equate to him being more of a father than Sesshomaru. If anything, he demonstrates more of a brotherly love towards her. As we all know, parents (which Sesshomaru embodies more based on real life patterns and parallels) will leave their older more capable children in charge of looking after their younger brothers and sisters. In this case, that would mean making Jaken responsible for watching over Rin and protecting her if need be. Ah-Un offers protection, too. Think of it as Jaken as the big brother and Ah-Un as the family dog who are babysitting while Sesshomaru as the parent of the household is away at work or taking care of business. I mean, they literally fit that description to a tee and I'm dying at the accuracy of it all! 🤣👌

[Quick! Someone write up a modern au where Sesshomaru finally gets out to have a nice date night but everything goes wrong in the most spectacular way. Like maybe Rin and Jaken catch a ride on Ah-Un to go spy!]

I recently revisited some episodes from The Final Act, and I couldn't believe how many moments like this there were where Rin got after Jaken or when she would "put him in his place" so to speak. Obviously, all of it is mostly harmless. I was only surprised by how often it occurred, not to mention how Jaken would just stand there and take it. Towards a supposed father figure, Rin's behavior is downright unacceptable. There's a certain level of respect a child is expected to show their parents/guardians, and that's just not what I'm witnessing here between them. Like at all.

Rather their dynamic has the nature of some sibling relationships like I mentioned above. So I really wish fans would stop pretending otherwise, because based on what we know of father-daughter relationships- healthy ones at least- they don't appear anything like what Jaken and Rin have. If you could please provide me other examples of where we've seen similar portrayals in fiction or in real life, then perhaps I can get on board.

Look, that doesn't have to mean that because Jaken isn't her father then Sesshomaru must be. They can both be her caretakers without necessarily filling that traditional father role. I'm just saying that if we're going to start assigning titles to characters, let's make sure we are accurate and truthful in our assessments. If you're going to label anyone Rin's dad, then it needs to be Sesshomaru. Jaken doesn't have precedence over him in terms of fatherly attributes, that just wouldn't make sense.

After all, this isn't about what you want to see, this is about what Rin very likely sees. It's safe to assume that she views Sesshomaru more like a father than she does Jaken. She knows she's safe with him (broadly speaking lol) and that he'll come for her no matter what. That sense of security and comfort is what a child seeks and what they should always feel in a parent's presence. She trusts and even idolizes him, just as a young and innocent child tends to do with their parents. At that age, parents are perfect and could do no wrong in their child's eyes. Idk about you, but this describes perfectly how Rin is around Sesshomaru.

Rin adores him and will follow him anywhere- yes, even into danger! That's what the innocence and unconditional love of a child will bring them to do if necessary. Fortunately, at the end of The Final Act we learn Sesshomaru takes Kaede's advice when he realizes that leaving Rin with her in the village is in her best interests. That way she'd be able to lead a more normal and safer life alongside other humans. Remember, Sessrin shippers, that doesn't mean he wasn't still a part of her life and didn't witness her become a young woman over the years right before his very eyes. Therefore, if they eventually do become romantically involved, then most if not all of those gifts had intimate and seductive intentions and it essentially constitutes as child grooming.

I understand from a Sessrin shipper's point of view why it'd be so much easier to claim Jaken as the father. In doing so, they diminish Sesshomaru's role in her upbringing. By refusing to acknowledge the real role he had in helping raise Rin (short periods can be crucial and impressionable too esp. in a child's early years so yes they did assist in raising her not only Kaede), these shippers are better able to justify how their filial-like relationship evolved into a romantic one. So yeah, I get it, if I were a Sessrin shipper I'd probably do the same. It's one of the more plausible arguments available to them, after all. "Let's pin Jaken as the father to fend off antis!" is the best chance they've got, but even so, it's still not good enough. But if you insist Jaken is indeed like a father to Rin, then Sesshomaru is most certainly one too. Who says she can't have two fathers anyway?

The thing is however much you want to deny or downplay what Sesshomaru truly means to Rin and vice versa, nothing will ever change or hide the truth of the matter. Please, stop acting like they're only traveling companions and nothing more. Some of y'all even go so far as to say that they're like strangers. Knowing potentially little about a person is not equal to a lack of love and affection. Making big assumptions such as this to defend your ship is actually doing you more harm than good. Let me elaborate.

According to your reasoning, if that's all Rin ever was to him was a companion and Sesshomaru had no real attachment to her, then what precisely is the basis of your ship? Recall that Adult!Rin doesn't exist yet, thus we have no real idea what she will be like or if she's even alive. So how can you make comments like that but then go on later to say "they have such a unique and unbreakable bond" or "only Rin can be the mother because she's the only human he ever cared for" if all that time spent traveling together didn't amount to much in the first place like you claimed to believe beforehand? Do you see how your rationalizing is confusing?

Contrary to what some of you may think, I'm not just saying all this because I'm an anti and I'm obligated to disagree with you, or whatever other excuse you want to tell yourself. Believe it or not, I'm attempting to give as unbiased and objective of an analysis I can based on widely accepted interpretations of family dynamics, development, and any history we know of.

Of course I respect that at times fans will perceive things differently since that's bound to happen. What's hard for me to wrap my head around however is the unwillingness of some fans- not exclusively Sessrin shippers- to apply basic common sense and sound judgment to their observations and deductions.

Looking at all our facts, then taking the small handful of scenes Sesshomaru and Rin do share together into account, one can logically conclude that their dynamic is akin to one found in a typical parent-child relationship. If you still fail to recognize Sesshomaru as a parent to Rin, then that's fine too. In the end, that won't really change the fact that he'd still take on a role resembling an adult figure overseeing a young child's care and protection. Be it as a vassal, guardian, what have you. Plus, nobody is saying here that Sesshomaru doesn't make mistakes regarding Rin's general well-being, but so do all parents. Overall, I think the majority of us agree that Rin is in good hands. Whether it's in his direct company or in his occasional supervision from his frequent visits to the village.

In other words, it doesn't really matter what exact title you assign him in relation to Rin, as the distribution of power is all inherently the same with any and all adult-child relationships. That bond never changes once you've established it either, seeing as it's a special kind of connection one can only form with a child and a child alone.

I was a teacher for a few years, and speaking from personal experience, you don't need to be a parent, per se, to take on a role of authority in a child's life. I know without a doubt that I could never and will never view any of those kids I taught in a sexual/romantic light later down the road; yes, not even once they become grown-ups who are independent and more than capable of making their own decisions. Those of you who disagree are usually missing the whole point though, because we're not trying to dictate what Adult!Rin can and cannot do like many tend to accuse of us doing. This isn't a question of taking away from her autonomy nor does it fall under "purity culture," which is why people shouldn't continue jumping to these outrageous conclusions and really listen for a change. You're deflecting from the real issue here when you choose to misinterpret what we're saying by ignoring the problem we're actually referring to. You cannot present a valid counter-argument if you persist in twisting our words.

Bottom line: once these kids become old enough to pursue a sexual/romantic relationship, of course they have that right if they're ready. All we're trying to say is you guys ought to stop pushing forward this it's-completely-normal-to-want-to-bang-your-adoptive-dad-since-you're-an-adult-and-can-do-as-you-please agenda and not expect backlash. Ship it if you want, but please stop acting like their romance would be the epitome of a pure and healthy relationship.

Sesshomaru may not wear his heart on his sleeve, but it's foolish to presume he didn't actually care about Rin during their whole time together just because he didn't openly express his feelings until the very end. Surely everybody can comprehend that people handle and process their emotions differently. The way Sesshomaru chooses to is completely valid for the most part, so let's cut him some slack regarding this already.

What I'm trying to get at is that any child whose life you played an influential role in will always be a kid in a lot ways to you even when they're old and wrinkly. Just as they will always picture you as the loved one who guided and protected them when they were most vulnerable and couldn't always fend for themselves. Can't we relate this to children we know personally and apply it accordingly?

Finally, I want to end on this note. Could you kindly take a look at these two images below for a second?

The reason I ask is because of something I recently read that's relevant to the topic. There was this pro-sessrin tweet I saw that stated Rin trying to take care of Sesshomaru when they first met is what a mom would do for a child, which in their opinion, translates to Rin being more like a mother than a daughter if anything.

First off: are you freaking kidding me????

Seriously, so now children aren't allowed to tend to their sick or injured parents?! Parents are apparently superhuman and shouldn't be offered a helping hand from a child, even if they mean well and want to help their parent who's in pain?? Now this Twitter user was mostly being a smartass, but at the same time, it was evident they genuinely thought they offered a valid enough point that warranted no further explanation or clarification.

Secondly, by saying this Sessrin fans don't seem to realize that in actuality they're contradicting themselves and proving the point we've been trying to make all along. Glancing at the first picture and moving down to the second, the role of the one being cared for and the caretaker is reversed. So then by their own logic, Sesshomaru IS in fact like a father to Rin.

What it comes down to is the names you give to the roles these characters play aren't as crucial as the dynamic they share. The specific characteristics of that dynamic are what define the importance of said role, not so much the name in the role itself. So real father or not, Sesshomaru and Rin clearly mean a lot to each other. Close relationships are defined and solidified by the devotion and belonging they have to one another, not solely by the duration of time spent together and their proximity.

Well, that's a wrap! I hope you guys got something outta this blog, and that you enjoyed or found some portions of it interesting. I would love to hear your thoughts on the subject from this fandom, but only engage in conversation if you plan to be respectful. Thank you!

[casmybelovedass]

The Destiel Folder: Season 6

[Season 4; Season 5] Man, this season... an emotional rollercoaster

Episode 3:

Cas admits he and Dean "share a more profound bond." (15:35) uuuhmm okay

"You think I came because you called?" (16:31) cut to "I always come when you call" later on in E21

"When a claim is laid on a living sould, it leaves a mark, a brand." ... like a handprint maybe? (22:33) Cas basically called dibs on Dean and admits it

Dean, I get it, Cas looks hot when he fights, but you don't have to look at him like this (24:42)

The amount of eye-fucking in this scene (25:56) almost 30 seconds (of Dean checking out Cas) of Old married coupleTM moments. Dean is worried about Cas dying again by the hands of an archangel. He just got attacked and wants to go out. But Cas has to go save the universe from a holy war. Basically a wife asking her soldier husband not to leave for the war.

[(26:28-26:30) Dean was totally looking at the BOOTY]

NOW FOR THE JUICY STUFF: Cas and Balthazar obviously had a history. More than brothers or war buddies. We could parallel them to Dean and Lisa: both old flames coming back after a long time and all.

Also, Balthazar can sense something is going on between Cas and Dean. It's so clear he can (35:26). ICWAW, we would assume Balthazar was an ex, getting jealous over Cas' new love interest

Episode 6:

"You asked me to be here, and I came", OH what about the whole 'I don't come because you call' thing? (13:40)

How domestic is this moment. Cas pouring Dean a drink, trying to comfort him (14:03). He hates seeing Dean like this, and hates even more the fact he can't do anything about it

Cas knows Dean is hurt enough already, and doesn't want to get him involved with a war that's not his to fight (14:20), but still wants to help

Episode 7:

Second time Cas starts stripping in front of Dean and he just stares (2:32)

Look, all I'm saying is... they really don't have to stand THAT CLOSE to each other (4:07)

Episode 9:

[Not a destiel moment but Dean struggling to say the words "gay guy" is too fucking funny to me (33:45)]

Episode 10:

Dean, will you not check out the angel in front of your brother, please? (11:54)

Dean is visibly uncomfortable at Cas watching porn practically NEXT to him, and having a BONER practically next to him. Understandable, but still... kinda gay (15:58) Look at Dean's face, my God (16:07)

[I'm screaming Dean looks like he's wondering what it'd be like to kiss Cas (25:29)]

"CAS?!" (26:23) the way Dean gets progressively more worried about Cas fading/being taken away and shit, kills me

[Cas is so fucking confused as to why Dean would suggest he'd let him have an hour alone with Meg (39:25), either that or he's embarrassed he might've actually wanted to. Meg and Castiel were cute together]

"If there's anything we can do-" "There isn't. I wish circumstances were different. *stares at Dean with puppy eyes* Much of the time, I'd rather be here." (39:46)

Also, Dean stares at Cas for 15 seconds, but averts his eyes when saying "We're your friends"? (40:01) Denial? Something's off. ICWAW, this would indicate tension, unspoken feelings

Just... the way Dean looks at Cas, and when he flies away (40:17) HIS EYES

Episode 11:

Balth jokingly calls Cas Sam's 'boyfriend', and Sam reacts normally, letting it fly over his head. When later in episode 17, Balth calls Cas "the angel in the dirty trench coat who's in love with you", Dean gets pissy. Just like later in 10x5. Touchy much? (13:48)

Balth admits he doesn't like Dean, and that "screwing him would delight me", but calls the one brother who threatened to crisp his wings, a "capable young man" (14:46). Jealous much? ICWAW we would read some sort of romantic rivalry between those two.

Episode 14:

This face... where have I seen this face before?

Oh yes, here

Dean looks at Lisa, the so called "love of his life", the same way he looks at Cas. Fuck my life

Episode 15:

"Cas" (Misha) starts stripping and Dean... stares... again (9:23)

"Well, Cas... now that you have your sword, try not to die by it." (39:53) Is it a saying? Or a reference to Dean being Michael's Sword? As in "He is gonna be the death of you"? And Balth looks at Cas THAT WAY?! (40:01) You can't tell me there was nothing between these two. Kill me now

Fucking stop being an old bitching married coupleTM already (40:25) you are hurting me

Episode 17:

Balth 'jokes' about Cas being in love with Dean (18:48) ICWAW we would read this as an ex being petty about the new love interest and teasing said love interest about it

Wow, jealous much, Dean? Again, ICWAW, this would totally be seen as jealousy for your crush's ex (27:30). And Dean, you're staring at Cas' lips again (27:37)

[Sam: "So, you killed 50,000 people for us?" Cas: *looks at Dean* "... No, I didn't... They were never born." (37:49) This is so stupid, but... sure, Cas... sure. That's what you ment.]

Cas makes a small speech about fighting for freedom, choosing your fate and all, while looking at Dean (38:55). OKAY SUBTEXT!!!

[As soon as Dean mentions boobs, Cas is gone (39:36) LOL]

Episode 19:

"It's not like Cas lives in my ass. The dude's busy. [...] Cas, get out of my ass!!!" "I was never in... your-" (4:28) and then they stare... Were you having unholy thoughts guys?

"Without your power you're basically just a baby in a trench coat" #MARRIED (10:38), "My friend is very sick." "I have a, uh... painful burning sensation." OH COME ON!!! (11:22)

"You know who whines? Babies. *pats Castiel*" (14:28) I'm sorry, pats him wHERE??!!

Dean saves Cas again (19:38)

The way Cas says "Dean, Dean!" (23:09)... I'm so fucking weak, and look at those EYES! (23:41) kill me now

"The kid... The little kid, he's one of them." "... Unbelievable." "Yeah, I know, Cas. You told me, all right?" (37:48) #MARRIED

Sam and Bobby immediately think Cas might be betraying them (39:31), while Dean won't even immagine the possibility. "This is Cas we're talking about!" (39:52)

Episode 20:

Even tho Dean can sense something is off with Cas, he won't bring himself to admit it. And the eye-car-sex. That. (4:44-4:53)

"You're distracted. [...] Is that all you're holding, huh? See... the stench of that Impala's all over your overcoat, angel." (6:20) this has such sexual undertones. ICWAW, it would be MENT as having sexual undertones. Also Crowley ships it

Dean protects Cas even tho clear evidence is there, and even feels bad about lying to him (12:06). And Cas feels oh so bad about Dean trying to be loyal to him, even when he was starting to suspect (13:18)

Dean still refuses to acknowledge the possibility of Cas' betrayal (19:56). His speech about Cas... I'm weak. "He broke ranks, gone to the mat, cut and bleeding for us, so many frigging times. This is Cas!" (20:10). ICWAW, this would be read as Dean having feelings for Cas, and as those feelings were getting in the way of his best judgment

Cas goes against the King of Hell to save the boys... but Dean first (21:48), and Dean defendes him against Bobby and Sam, apologizing for doubting about him. Cas hates having to break their trust

The look on Dean's face as he realizes Cas had been lying the whole time... BROKEN (23:35-23:49)

Cas doesn't want Dean to have to sacrifice more than he already had for him (25:19), and when Crowley shows up, Cas' first instinct is to look back at Dean protectively (25:30), and does that again before following Crowley (26:17)

Cas wants Dean to be happy, stay retired, even tho he was so longingly looking at him moments earlier (29:09)

"You gotta look at me, man. [...] Look me in the eye and tell me you're not working with Crowley." (32:38) the absolute desperation in both Dean and Cas, how HURT they look. THEIR EYES! Dean looks devastated

"I did it to protect you, I did it to protect all of you!" (33:09) one of the many "you, all of you" no-homo saves Cas pulls while talking to/about Dean

"I had no choice!" "No, you had a choice... You just made the wrong one." (34:21) how fucking hurt Dean looks. "Where were you when I needed to hear it?" THE EYES

"I was there... Where were you? *flashback to Cas looking back at Dean*" I'M DEAD

"It's not too late. Damn it, Cas. We can fix this!" "Run. You have to run, now. RUN!" (35:33) and they do, but Dean looks back at Cas, and the way they look at each other... STOP (35:47-35:52) ICWAW, this whole scene would seem like someone trying to save their loved one, and OH boy, that stare exchange would seem either a silent confession or a reminder of their feelings for the other

Cas visits Dean in the night, even tho they clearly don't trust him and don't want him there, and Dean leaves it be (38:06), and even apologizes for having to angel-proof the house against him

#MARRIED (38:28), "I'm doing this for you, Dean. I'm doing this because of you." (38:35) ICWAW... do I even need to point this out?

"Next to Sam, you and Bobby are the closest thing I have to family..." the look on Cas' face as Dean says this (39:15) "... that you are like a brother to me." did Cas' eyes just get more glossy? Poor baby. Also, ICWAW, by the way they interact, this statement would feel wrong on so many levels

"You're just a man. I'm an angel." ... why does it feel like Cas is telling that to himself more than to Dean? (39:43) "I'm sorry, Dean." (39:55) Kill me

Cas questions his decisions, asks God for guidance, the moment he understood he hurt Dean. He doesn't want to hurt Dean, but will do what he has to do to if it means he will be safe

Episode 21:

[Not a destiel moment, but "fragile masculinity" much, Dean? (4:20) "I was too busy having sex with women." (why do you feel the need to specify 'women'?)]

This Dean-Balth bickering has such current-former love interest fight vibes (8:52). Come on, ICWAW, this would totally be the case

Here's another Cas/Lisa parallel: how Dean acts here, looking for Ben and Lisa (13:11), and how he acts in S8 while looking for Castiel ("WHERE'S THE ANGEL!?")

Cas saves Dean again (21:46). "I didn't ask for your help." "Well, regardless. You're welcome." #MARRIED

They are both on the verge of tears... "I thought you said that we were like family." (22:22) They hate this situation. They hate not being like always, close, friendly, family

"Dean... I do everything that you ask... I always come when you call. And I am your friend." (22:39) the way he says 'Dean' and how his voice trembles. Dean is basically almost crying now (23:45)

"Dean, I said I'm sorry and I ment it." "Thank you... I wish this changed anything..." "I know.. So do I." (37:45)

[Alright. I do believe Dean really grew to love Lisa during that year they spent together, but I don't buy the "I always loved you, ever since that one hook up on that one weekend we knew each other for" shit. Dean wanted to give a try to the whole 'apple pie life' he'd promised Sam, with a good woman he knew Dean had feelings for.

If he grew to love Lisa over a couple of years after 1 hook up, I'm sure he could do the same thing for Cas after over a decade (he for sure would have already If Cas Were A Woman)]

Episode 22:

["You've always got little old me." "Yes... I'll always have you." (30:26) These two... Come on, they HAD to be ex lovers!]

"We were family once. I'd have died for you. I almost did a few times (Cas did actually, twice). So if that means anything to you... Please... I've lost Lisa, I've lost Ben, and now I've lost Sam... Don't make me lose you too." (39:55) ICWAW, this would be seen as a straight up CONFESSION

The hurtful look on Dean's face when Cas says "You're not my family, Dean.", and the terror when he thought for a second that Sam might have killed him (40:39)

["You will bow down and profess your love unto me, your Lord... or I shall destroy you." ... okay, Cas, honey, I get you are tired of waiting, but this is not the right way to get a confession out of Dean (41:20)]

[Season 7>>]