#I'm kind of concerned about his logic but he also processes things way differently than I do and y'know it's not my life
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
violetclarity · 1 year ago
Text
my best friend is moving in with his boyfriend and I am Not handling it super well so real grown-ups of tumblr, how do you deal with it when a good friend has a long-term, serious partner who you think is...fine?
#I've not had to deal with this before because all of my partnered friends are with people who I either#a) genuinely like as people or b) do not feel bad about disliking#this man is fine? he treats my friend well but I personally would never choose to hang out with him if they weren't dating?#like I don't know what my friend sees in him#and I'm also not sure what he sees in my friend#not in a 'I don't think my best friend is worthy of love' way o b v i o u s l y#but they started dating fairly soon after the partner got *divorced* and it kind of seems like#he just really wanted to be in a serious relationship again but like. with a man instead of a woman.#but my friend also never talks about his feelings so I have no real insight into his pov!!#I'm kind of concerned about his logic but he also processes things way differently than I do and y'know it's not my life#so I'm sure it will be fine#also part of what I am having trouble with is definitely that I never thought this friend would *be* in a serious relationship#and there are some minor betrayal feelings happening (especially bc he's moving an extra 20 mins away from me booo)#(why you'd want to move from a cool place near things to a boring place in the boring suburbs is beyond me but I digress)#but (despite my friend's preferences) I'm going to be seeing a lot more of the partner now that they are living together#and I'd like to get to a point where I actually like him maybe?#that may be too tall of an order. where he doesn't actively annoy me??#the man once tried to devil's advocate brittney greiner being stuck in russia I don't think I can be blamed for being annoyed lmao#that feeling when you think all your friends deserve The Absolute Best In The World when it comes to romantic partners#so you get pissed when their partners don't seem to recognize their amazingness
4 notes · View notes
mirror-to-the-past · 2 years ago
Text
Okay, I'm speculating more about Xion's deal at this point, and it's embarrassing that it's taken me to Day 117 to realize at least some of it:
First of all, why was I even debating on my earlier theorizing post who Xion's "origin person" might be? Of course it's Sora! Why? BECAUSE SHE WIELDS THE KINGDOM KEY (of course, there's the whole thing in the KH1 journal about Riku being the one meant to originally wield the Kingdom Key, but I'm gonna set that aside for now, because he's got a different Keyblade at this point in the story- Kingdom Key is now Sora's). I must've seriously turned off my brain, or just overthought things to the point of exploding, but it took the "Xion's Keyblade" day where she and Roxas were waving it around for me to go "oh. OH." And just... have a bit of a facepalm moment.
As for her origins, I believe Axel and Saïx's more recent conversation gives me grounds to believe she is not a Nobody of typical origin. It's more obvious, in retrospect. If my "Sora had another heart" theory had any merit, than she would've been found around the same time as Roxas, but it was weeks (I think) later for Xion to be taken into the organization. Saïx claims that Xion found her origins in Castle Oblivion along with Naminé, which is a place associated with Naminé and her memory-scrambling abilities. Given that both Roxas and Xion have their memories scrambled as, what I can assume, a byproduct of Sora losing his own memories in CoM (therefore preventing the true Sora Nobodies from being able to remember their origin life), I can assume Roxas has the majority of Sora's memories, and Xion likely exists to house a specific kind of memory that may or may not be important to Sora's being (At this point that "specific kind of memory" seems to be founded in Sora's friends and overall childhood nostalgia, given that Xion can only recall staring out at the ocean with "someone," likely referencing times where Sora, Kairi, and Riku would stare out at the sea from either the Paopu tree or the docks, as demonstrated in KH1). Anyway, why would Xion exist like this?
Well, this could've been because of external manipulation in some way that I couldn't begin to explain, in terms of Sora's memory separation/restoration process. Xion might have been made in a semi-artifical way, as a means to an end. What end? Dunno.
Alternatively, she may not be a result of external manipulation, and moreso that there are memories Sora was previously unaware of that manifested itself into a being to house those repressed/forgotten memories- Xion. More loose of an additional factor, but it would fit with her all-black color scheme. I also just think it would be neat to have a duality factor for her and Roxas: Blonde-haired Roxas as the open emotions and memories, the conscious. Black-haired Xion as the hidden emotions and memories, the unconscious. It'd be a cool way to personify aspects of an individual's psyche in a Jungian-esque way, as well as a follow-up of my current hunt of "let's spot Sora's repressed negative feelings!" ("Happy faces," "Sora's forgotten memories in CoM," "Anti Form," he's pretty much got a potentially concerning Example per game, so far)
The second explanation is probably not what the narrative is going for, but it'd be neat.
Before I forget, branching off of that last post regarding Xion's hood that apparently has lore relevance... the only explanation I can think of is that her face can change, and she's hiding it for whatever reason, or Roxas' POV makes it look like she's hiding her face for whatever reason. If we're going off the logic that she's a Sora Nobody, perhaps her face looks like Sora in those moments she obscures her face? It'd be a strange power, if you can even call it that, as Roxas has done nothing of the sort, nor has any other Nobody changed to look like their original people (I have no idea about the other guys, admittedly- I've never seen their original selves, but Roxas doesn't look like Sora, sooo...). Another potential point for the "she's not a natural Nobody," theory, perhaps.
We'll see how accurate I was with this, later...
Side ramble...
I love how Kingdom Hearts utilizes personified characters (Nobodies) meant to demonstrate some aspects of a character's personality in a compartmentalized breakdown of their psyche, while still having those characters contain personalities and arcs of their own. It's so neat holding Roxas and Sora next to each other in my head and just going "hm, and what could that mean?" For example, on the following "Vacation" day, I thought it was interesting how Xion and Axel were able to follow some of their own desires (if I take what they did on their day off as truth, but anyway), like Axel lazing around unapologetically and Xion having the motivation to train and get stronger, while Roxas couldn't find a drive for himself outside of his friends. It was both sad and endearing, and compounds quite nicely on what can be observed in Sora's previously demonstrated self-sacrificing traits. He's too wrapped up in others to figure out his own wants.
13 notes · View notes
rachelillustrates · 3 years ago
Text
So I'm rewatching "The Best Revenge is Dressing Well" (surprise! Said no one) and one thing I've noticed that first struck me kinda weird, but I wanna talk through, is the slight level of competition/personal jealousy between our co-captains before the party goes to shit and they come together at the end.
Tumblr media
(Image from The Verge.)
We go into the episode from Ed's perspective, mostly - this is the first time we get any solid, personally emotional backstory on him, focused specifically around racism and class difference (done SO WELL, as has already been mentioned) so we know he's already hyperfocused on "winning" this situation, getting the approval of who he was taught by his mother to be his "betters," even though he knows - logically, as an adult, as we saw in what he said to the captain they took down - that that's not necessarily true, it just still feels like it is, to him. So, he's very invested in impressing them, already.
Stede - who doesn't even want to be there - should, theoretically, not care so much about that approval himself - but as we see, he starts acting a little jealous when Ed takes attention away from him, which makes the partygoers a) ignore him or b) antagonize him outright whenever he tries to get a word in. From there, he scoffs - at first - at Ed's continued attempts to impress them (the piano playing, the minor shenanigans) and then removes himself from the situation entirely - looking for Frenchie and Olu, and then taking refuge in the quiet on deck.
I think its important to note that in the opening of the episode, as he and his crew are supposed to be learning from Ed's crew in the raid, he's not exactly on the most confident of footing - he identifies several bad habits, as he points out, one of which we see Ed correct (the swap-looting) as well as needing Ed's help with interrogation tactics (as much as Ed's behavior there interested him in.... other ways). So to him, being among the gentry again, I think he expects to be at least on equal or equalish footing with them, and to hopefully impress Ed in the process since these are "his people."
But the point is - they're not. They abandon him for Ed the moment Ed proves more interesting, insulting him, even - which Ed plays into, out of his own desire to be approved of - which is probably very triggering for Stede, because of his history of being bullied. AND because of wanting to be accepted, himself, and once again failing to reach that. And what's more comfortable than feeling powerless in the face of all that, as always? A little jealousy, especially since - with their approval on (what seems, at first to be) his own terms - Ed doesn't "need" Stede's guidance here after all. That, of course, enmeshed with genuine concern that these people will drop Ed, like they dropped him, which we do see him express - only to be ignored, again. So not only is he not popular with them, but his expertise of what happens with these types of people after they tire of you is discarded, as well. Leaving Stede in a very powerless situation, once again.
I think its also interesting to note, that considering that Stede's trying to win in Ed's world (piracy) and Ed's trying to win in Stede's (aristocracy) - especially with the excuse of the "plan" to take Stede's place - the idea of competition is already subconsciously there, in a sense. On top of the fact that in friendships of the same (perceived) gender, competition can often be encouraged by society at large, too - which pops up a LOT in the kind of "buddy comedy" stories that more mainstream folks seem to have assumed this story was, at first.
So I think the writers were trying to address all that and nip it in the bud.
Because, of course, that all goes to hell - Ed makes a mistake with the spoons, and they turn on him too, which sends him right back to Stede. At first, with intentions to take care of the situation himself, violently. But here Stede steps up for real - facing the situation for what it is, jealousy and fears of inadequacy be damned - and showing up for the person he was supposed to be there for in the first place. That, as always, is where his true power is found - being true to himself, AND to the people in his care. Even telling Ed to stand down, and let him handle it. Ed may not be capable of meeting them where they're at, when it turns verbally-cruel (except to turn deserved physical violence on them), but Stede can. And does, with the use of Frenchie and Abshir's knowledge - hysterically, taking them all down - getting them to take themselves down - in a manner that ends in violence after all (which they, again, technically visit upon themselves - just like the demise of both Badmintons).
And that - having to step up and be there for Ed and let go of the idea of giving any fucks about what these folk expect of him, approve of, etc. - gets them back on track (and is kind of great foreshadowing for what happens in the last episode, and what will come next, I hope I hope). There is no note of individual jealousy or competition, really, at all between them from then on - even the banter during the swordfighting lessons is charged with just flirting and affection, no any real sense of trying to win one over the other, and the jealousy over Calico Jack's appearance later is about that relationship, not about Ed being better than Stede or vice versa. Any trace of that is done with - they've moved past it.
Leaving wide, open space for Stede to catch Ed at his softest, most vulnerable so far, looking at the red silk again after the party's rejection. And to offer him praise - calling him sophisticated after all, and meaning it, because what he's seen of Ed so far - already - is truer than any of the bullshit pandering and passive aggression the upper crust displayed to either of them.
Sophisticated means: "having, revealing, or proceeding from a great deal of worldly experience and knowledge of fashion and culture."
So what Ed's shown him, both in his own experience as a pirate and his own willingness to learn about new things and deal with people who - Stede knows - are less than both of them after all, THAT fits the word much better than any idea of high society.
🍊💕
61 notes · View notes
diaco1968 · 4 years ago
Text
The wandering prince of the outcasts
Fantasy au
Exiled prince Shoto todoroki x reader
Also, smut
Warning! A little smut/ v sex, passive tiny bit of angst, porn with too much plot? XD I just get carried away with fantasy au.
Tumblr media
Sprinting out of the village gates with a sharp turn off the main path to shake off your pursuers you had reached a steep slope, immediately realising why there was no path leading this way. In front of you was a giant deep pit and now you couldn't stop running. "Oh crap!" You screamed as you braced yourself to fall down the deep pit of death in front of you. But you didn't, your legs wobbled as you slipped on something and fell on your butt, sliding over the pit and down the slope the rest of the way. You came to a halt on the even ground, heart still beating rapidly in your chest and panting heavily. Your hands only now felt the coldness under you making you look down in awe at the ground underneath you and the path you just slid down on. 'Ice?...' your jaw hung open but the sound of someone clearing their throat right from over you snapped you back to yourself and you whipped back around to look at the source "Ehem. Are you alright?" You saw a hand in your face urging you to accept the help to get up. Your eyes moved up and landed on his face. Oddly satisfying symmetrical two colored hair. And mesmerising eyes. Fair skin, except for a burnt patch around his one sharp blue eye. Definitely not from around here or a regular wanderer. "I'm great." You slowly reached up, smiling sheepishly as you took his hand and stood up "I, um... was that somehow, you?" You pointed back at the ice behind you. "What?" He said unfazed as he glanced behind you before locking eyes with yours again. "The ice that just saved... me...?" You turned around and trailed off. It as all gone. The thick ice had disappeared with just a trail of glistening wet grass. "What?!" You looked at him seriously "I know what I saw! I slipped on a layer of ice that appeared out of nowhere! Now if that is something you need to hide, it's none of my business. I'll keep your secret." You huffed crossing your arms over your chest as you narrowed your eyes at him. "I don't know what you're talking about. But Please do be more careful next time." He replied looking at you amused. "I will. Thanks for saving my life." You grumbled, kind of disappointed as you turned around and walked away from him. You were definitely sure you didn't just imagine that. You had thought you were in for a treat by meeting a mysterious wizard or something, but well, denying he just used magic was logically how it should've turned out. People weren't kind to wizards and the fact that he had it in his heart to save you from inevitable death even though it wasn't any of his concern, had you feeling grateful anyway.
"You're welcome." He said quietly as you walked away out of earshot a half amused smile still on his face. The fact that you just accepted his power and then accepted him denying it without pushing him, had caught his interest. He started walking again and pulled the reigns lightly once before letting go so the white stallion followed him as well.
You were reunited with your bunch at a nearby inn, Kaminari apologizing profusely for getting you in such a mess back in the village. You had brushed him off with a light pat on the shoulder and now you were sitting at one of the tables with him, Krishima and Sero drinking and eating the day's loot away while you waited for Bakugou to join you. A curious bunch. You had met them through Kirishima, when you've been wandering around alone one night and offered the only piece of food you had to a lonely looking dragon that didn't roast you on sight. Much to your surprise he transformed into a bubbly red headed boy right in front of your eyes and despite your protests led you away to his pals. Dragged you by the hand more like. And well a simple 'can we keep her!?' And a bunch of yelling Bakugou later, you found yourself travelling with these guys. Occasionally splitting up to do your own things when you got to a town or a village and then meeting back up somewhere and moving on. A curious bunch indeed.
The familiar booming sound of the ash blonde malre reached you over the sound of the chatter, way before he even entered the inn himself. "Oh there he is!... and... who's that?" Kirishima perked up happily but immediately his expression changed to concerned. You turned your head towards the entrance and sure enough Bakugou was dragging someone in yelling something about being spied on. Low and behold the person he dragged in was no other than the ice boy who just saved you earlier. 'Definitely not a chance of keeping this one.' You thought to yourself as you glanced at Kirishima's defensive expression. He was close with Bakugou and they were for objective reasons... wanted dead or alive. It didn't help that the wandering ice boy, despite obvious efforts at disguise, a brand new traveller's cloak, looked like royalty... or at least some sort of authority. You labled him off as some sort of noble son in his rebel stage of life. "Unhand me this instance! You were threatening a dog for barking at you and I was just watching." The boy objected and you snorted totally seeing Bakugou doing that. You decided to pay him back for saving your life earlier so you stood up and walked towards them "oh my! Is that really you?! What would your father say?" You reached them walking past Bakugou who was now silent looking at you quizzically and gave the boy a light half hug, ripping Bakugou's hand off of his shoulder in the process "don't get me wrong I do miss you! But you are so far away from home." You pulled back and He looked equally as confused as Bakugou, only way less violent and way more calm. You huffed glaring at Bakugou "is that a way to treat my cousin?" He narrowed his eyes at you "your cousin?! He looks like he just came straight out of the royal castle!" Shoto looked surprided at that looking down at his attire and murmuring to himself more so than anything "I do?..." you laughed grabbing the boy's shoulder and started leading him out "he just doesn't know what to wear and where to wear it to. I don't look like royalty to you, do I? My cousin definitely isn't either." Bakugou wasn't too convinced but let you two walk away with a grumpy growl.
Once outside you turned the corner slipping behind the inn with him and a safe distance away from any ears in hearing range, you let him go "of all the people you could randomly piss off, it had to be Bakugou?" You chuckled as he fixed his clothes where Bakugou had crumbled in his fist. "He told a dog, and I qoute, 'you think you are better than me?!' Then he demanded that the dog fight him if it dared when he got barked at..." he deadpanned looking at you. "Yeah that sounds about right." You chuckled looking at him kindly, making a little smile cross his lips. "Alright I'm (y/n) and as my 'cousin', I think I should know your name too." His smile wore off immediately and he looked a bit uneasy making you soften up a bit "look, you don't look like you belong out here on your own. I just want to help. Consider it pay back for saving my life?" He looked up at you wondering why you took 'magic' so lightly. "Shoto, you can call me Shoto." You smiled at him brightly "Alright Shoto, we're go-" you were interrupted at the loud sounds of commotion coming from the direction of the inn. You gestured for him to be quiet as you peeked around the corner to see what was going on. As usual it was Bakugou yelling but this time there were a bunch of people clad in dark cloaks backing him out of the inn along with Kirishima. The moment one of them shot a big blue ball of fire at the two, Kirishima transformed into a dragon, blocking it and flew the both of them away, getting chased by a couple of the cloaked forms who transformed into winged creatures and persued. From the other side you could see Sero and Kaminari hopping on their horses and each rode off in a different direction trying to lose their own pursuers who were hot on their trails.
You stepped out of your cover and you were immediately stopped by one of the cloaked ones smirking down at you with a crooked smirk over chapped lips, topped off with a scar on one side. He raised his hand towards you to grab your face. You gasped in fear but the hand in front you burst into flames and as the guy started howling in pain Shoto grabbed you from behind, whistling his horse over, hopping on and pulled you on as well spurring the giant beast, who reared loudly before galloping inside the forest.
He hadn't paid much attention when pulling you on the horse and now you were draped over his lap on your stomach trying not to throw up from all the movements of the horse. "Okay okay! We lost them! I need to get off!" Shoto glanced down at you blushing as you clutched his thigh to steady yourself. He pulled the reigns and the horse came to a halt with a little skid. You immediately pushing yourself out of his lap and off his horse before he could help you, turning towards the ground to dry heave. He hopped off next to you "I'm so sorry, it was just too dangerous..." you raised your hand to stop him as you caught your breath. He rubbed the back of his neck nervously as he waited for you.
"Ice and fire..." you whispered. He could feel the cold sweat starting to form on his back. "The power of ice and fire!" You jumped to your feet and looked at him with wide eyes. He raised his hands slowly to calm you down "no, no, listen-"
"You are the cursed prince!"
He winced at the name turning his head to the side "well shit... I mean you no harm- mh!?" With the sharp pain on his chest he looked at you only to find you in his face, poking your finger in his chest accusingly "why didn't you say so!"
"...excuse me?" He inquired tilting his head to the side confused once again. "This is the part you run away, usually screaming, scared for your life." You looked at him mouth gaping "what are you talking about?! We've been looking for you everywhere!"
The flames danced tauntingly as you two stared each other down, each from one side of the bonefire. A bonefire you had pestered him to make using his own fire cause it was freezing cold. "Why would you be looking for me?" He urged on. You took in his form. Sitting up, back straight as a stick and legs folded underneath him neatly. "What do you mean? You are the lost prince!" You insisted making him glare at you. "I am exiled. I am cursed. What do you want from me?" You sighed hugging your knees tightly to your chest resting your chin on them wondering if he really didn't know. "You haven't been back home in a long time, have you?" You asked quietly and he softened up only a little. You continued without a reply "the 'king'," you scoffed "steals, tortures and kills. No one is allowed to stand in his way... he rules with an iron fist. And no one is safe. You are the rightful ki-"
"Stop. I'm a curse. I hurt people around me. Hell I even hurt myself." He vaguely gestured at his burnt face. "I am no one's king." He said firmly looking away from the fire. You watched him shocked at the hateful tone in his voice as he spoke of himself. "I'm a monster. If I were you, I'd leave me be as soon as I could." He got to his feet and stepped away from the fire and you to lie down on the flat floor with his back to you a little ways away. You watched his back for a while before staring into the undying flames, drowning yourself in your own thoughts. Anxious about what might've happend to your friends.
He woke up to the sound of struggle. It was silent, just the sound of something dragging and hitting on the ground of the forest behind him. He sat up and turned around. His eyes locked on a dark cloaked figure standing over what he suddenly realised was your struggling figure, kicking your feet and gasping dryly with a raspy voice. He shot to his feet, fire coming to life in the palm of his hand as he closed the distance between himself and the man and slammed his other hand, covered in a hard layer of ice in the intruders side. He jumped shouting in pain and staggering away only to be stopped by the flaming hand inches away from his face "let her go!"
"You are supposed to be dead!" The guy yelled back angry, and Shoto burned his shoulder as he grabbed onto it. "I said, let her go!" The man yelled in pain and tried to move away. "You get people around you killed. You kill them. Look at her! She is like this cause she was with you!" You clawed at the vine that had sprouted right underneath your head and was wrapped snugly around your neck, tightening ever so slowly. "Don't listen to him!" You managed only a quiet wheeze. "Shut up wench! Come with me and she'll live." Shoto looked clearly torn between listening to him or to you. He didn't know what to do. His head was racing as he lowered his hand from the guys face, the flames dying out slowly. "NO!" you wriggled gasping for air, and it received you a light kick to the legs "quiet! That's it boy. Don't struggle." The man reached out to grab him.
Shoto knew who these guys were. The secret puppets of the king who did his dirty work for him in the dark. Flashbacks of the day he had fled death by what could only be considered a miracle, flooded his mind and before he could stop himself his right hand slashed at the man, freezing him to the ground in an instant. He stared at the frozen man for a second but the sound of your quiet wheezes as your legs seized their kicking and your eyes rolled back in your head brought him to his senses. Hyperventilating as he dropped to his knees next to your head he tried ripping the vines off of you to no avail. "Oh fuck! What do I do?! (Y/n)! Please! I can't!..." he raised his shaky left hand grabbing the vine at where it's root had sprouted out of the ground. He had no choice. He couldn't watch you die... but what if he was the reason you would die? What if he burned you?... he grit his teeth and very carefully set his hand on fire. The vine started to burn off and released you of it's hold as you gasped for air, coughing and turning on your side. He sat back from you, watching you worried. It took you a while to catch your breath, staring at the ground as your vision unblurred. You took in a big gulp of air letting it out and sighing as your hand raised to rub at your sore neck. That's when Shoto couldn't keep quiet anymore "did I burn you?! I'm so sorry! I just couldn't do anything else! You are right to hate me, it's all my fault! I will leav-" you crawled over to him and despite him jerking away from you, your hand reached out and cupped his still warm cheek carefully "shhhh! I'm alright Shoto! You saved me! Again!" You laughed, your eyes betraying your expression, tears pricking the corners, and pulled him close, hugging his head to your chest. He resisted at first muscles tense as dry wood. "None of this is your fault! He was here for me, you just happened to be an extra treat. He would've killed me anyway if not for you!" Your fingers ran through his hair, smoothing it out, feeling him calm down and after a minute or so slowly slump down onto you when he stopped struggling against your hold.
It's been so long since he had last felt the safety and warmth of another's embrace, he just couldn't help nuzzling into you, not caring about the awkward way you two were positioned.
Your eyes moved from Shoto's head to the frozen statue standing just over the two of you, glaring at it hatefully as if he could ever see anything again.
Neither of you could sleep again after that so you decided to lead him to the place you and your little gang of misfits usually met up when seperated, a little hidden cave somewhere deep in the forest. In the way you decided to tell him why you guys were wanted, and hunted; how you were a group considered as dangerous to the throne and how you have decided to look for the lost runaway heir to help him get back in power. He still wasn't too on board with this part of your plan but your sweet talking had managed to get the rough edge off his nerves when he talked about his power. You convinced him, or it seemed so that you did, that for the most part he was in control of his 'powers', you refused to use the word curse. You told him If he sometimes lost control of it was because he had been suppressing it for too long. He needed to accept it as part of himself. He agreed but you couldn't tell if just to make you stop talking about him or genuinely agreed. You told him how there were people, like you, like Bakugou, like Kirishima, Kaminari, Sero and so many others who were born different, like Shoto. How you were all shunned and abused for it and how Shoto would be your saviour. He had asked about you, and you showed him your neck. Healed with no sign of any injury ever received wether bruise or burn. He looked at you in awe for a long time and you caught him stealing curious glances at you.
It was a long ride, full of talk, about him, about you, and by the time you reached the cave half a day later, you found yourself to have grown very close with Shoto.
When you got to the cave, much to your concern, there was no one there. But you decided to give it a little bit of time before getting too worried. You cleaned up around the inside of the cave to make it inhabitable for a while and Shoto tied his horse somewhere close by, making sure it had enough room to rest and eat, removing his saddle and brushing the dust off of it. He brought his saddle inside the cave setting it somewhere in a corner, eyes still watching you curiously. "We need wood for the fire." You said suddenly as you recreated the place for the bone fire, setting little stones back in the place of the old ones. "I'm going to go get some. You stay here and rest." You suggested, wiping your hands on your long skirt, heading out, not liking the idea of having to sit around in the darkness of the cave. "I'll come." he followed you and you turned to shoot him a smile.
The two of you wandered the woods nearby the cave and gathered wood and a bunch of edible fruits and berries. He was silent for most of the walk but he finally decided to voice his thoughts. The one that was bugging him since earlier. "Can you take away any kind of scar?" He blurted out and you paused to look up at him from where you were kneeling to pick berries. You watched him for a little while in silence, him fidgeting uncharacteristically under your gaze as he stared intently at the ground beneath his feet. You stood up and walked up to him his eyes unmoving. You cupped his left cheek softly, stroking your thumb over the burned skin. His eyes slowly moved up from the ground to yours, you smiled kindly at him looking apologetic "no, I can't do anything about old injuries." He sighed and looked to the side "pity." You turned his face back towards you "maybe, but I like it. It makes you, you." You leaned in and watched his eyes grow ever bigger before shutting tight as you traced your lips on the old scar right under his eye, kissing it gently and smiling at him when you pulled away. His face was almost matching his hair color now and his heart hammered against his chest rapidly. You giggled and he couldn't help himself. He leaned in pressing his lips onto yours firmly.
You froze in shock blushing furiously. And he pulled away after a few seconds a stuttering mess. "I'm so s-sorry! I don't know w-what came over me... please excuse my behaviour..." you blinked grabbing his collar with both hands making him go silent as he watched you anxiously "uh...(y/n)? Mph!" You pulled him back to you by his collar crashing your lips against his, kissing him fiercely. He got over his initial surprise rather quickly, hands moving up to your hips and the small of your back, pulling you closer while his lips moved against yours in sync.
You let go of his collar and slid your arms up around his shoulders, pressing your chest onto his as you pulled his head down towards yourself more, deepening the kiss and humming in content. He took a couple of steps forward and you found yourself backed into a tree. He leaned down low, slipping his hands over your curves and grabbing your thighs, pulling you up swiftly and wrapping your legs around his waist, not once breaking the kiss. You were the one who had to pull away to catch your breath, him trailing his lips down the side of your jaw and onto your neck, sucking the delicate skin between his teeth to nip on it lightly before licking and kissing over the abused, redening skin, drawing breathy little moans out of you. "I want you." He whispered by your ear as he sucked on the skin right behind it, making goosebumps rise on your skin. You whimpered, legs tightening around his waist pulling him closer to you. His hard on pressing into you as if his lustful confession needed confirmation. "Take me then." You moaned as you tugged on his hair so you could crash and mould your lips against his again. He groaned in response to your words, kissing you hungrily, his tongue swiping over your lips requesting entrance. Your lips parted letting his tongue slip past and into your mouth, whining as he took his time, slipping your skirt up over your legs and bunching it up around your waist, his now freed cock brushing against your inner thigh. He moved agonizingly slow as he pulled your underwear to the side, rubbed himself over your dripping core, slicking his length up on your wetness. It proved to be deliciously rewarding though, when he slowly started sinking his cock in through your warm hole. You gasped and he stopped moving, pulling away from the kiss and resting his forehead on yours, trying to catch his breath, shuddering from having to hold himself back from just pounding you senseless, your tightness wrapped around his head making him feel dizzy with lust. "Are you alright?" His voice was caring but sounded strained. You moaned, nodding your head, which only made him move deeper into you. You bit your lower lip, gripping his hair and tightly clawing into his clothes.
It took him a few more minutes to sink fully inside your heat, careful not to hurt you. His forehead was now resting on the tree behind you, giving you full access to his neck as you nipped and sucked on him to your heart's content, while you were getting adjusted to his size sheathed fully inside you. In retrospect, it wasn't a good idea, cause your lips and teeth on him like that almost made him lose it a few times. You started growing restless, legs tightening their hold around his waist as you clenched around his cock, making him growl in your ear, you shuddering and whimpering in response "move! Shotooo." you whined and he didn't waste a second, pulling away and thrusting back into you right away. You gasped sharply, mouth falling open in a silent cry, digging your nails into his shoulders. His lips were back on yours when you found your voice and started moaning and mewling loudly, eating up all your sounds eagerly, his thrusts never seizing in depth or speed, pressing your back further into the rough barks of the tree each time. You reached your limit first, fluttering and throbbing around him as you came over his cock, leaning your head back on the tree, arching into him, him kissing your neck and helping you ride it out. You were considerably louder as he chased his own release pounding into your oversensitive core over and over with erratic thrusts. Mewling and whimpering, it was almost too much for you; you gripped his hair tight and harshly tugged his head back to bite his jaw and neck. Surprised he hissed at the sharp pain and finally let out a deep moan as he released his load inside you, the warmth exploding deep in your core making you quiver with your second orgasm washing over you, as you clung to him tightly. He kept you up, resting his forehead on yours, watching you with tired loving eyes as you two caught your breaths still connected.
Once he couldn't stand on his feet any longer, he held you close to himself and away from the tree's harsh surface as he lightly dropped to his knees, pulling out of you and setting you down before hugging you tightly to his chest, face buried in the crook of your neck, fingers running through your hair in a soft caress. You nuzzled your face into his chest, rubbing your hands up and down his back soothingly. Both of you enjoying the comfortable calming silence engulfing the both of you in your afterglow.
"Make it go away."
"Hmm. Nah."
"(Y/n)."
"No, 'my' dear Shoto."
"The dog boy will not get off my back for the rest of my life..."
You laughed as you whirled around to look at his blushing face. As you two were cleaning up by the pond he had seen your not too small piece of work on his neck, turning a rather dark purple as it peaked from under his collar.
"He won't notice. Even if he does he is not unfamiliar with being marked. Kiri likes marking what's his. He will not bring it up." You pulled his head down and kissed his forehead.
When you got back to the cave the guys were all already back, Sero and Kaminari, a little beat but alive and well, relieving you of your concern. Not a scratch on Bakugou and Kirishima, as expected. You smiled as you sat with them deciding to introduce Shoto properly after they've all been settled and well rested.
"Oh shit, Todoroki! What happened to your neck?!" Kaminari's voice filled up the small space of the cave, drowning all your chatter into silence, eyes moving all on to Shoto. He sighed locking eyes with you.
"A wild cat attacked me."
Bakugou snorted into his drink as Kirishima grinned sheepishly, much to Sero's and Kaminari's confusion.
249 notes · View notes
funkymbtifiction · 4 years ago
Note
I absolutely loved the sorting chats thing but I was wondering if you have any other questions for figuring out your primary house? I took the test and I got the hatstall thing twice so I basically had to give my own imput on what house I think I am, but I can't figure out if I'm a Slythering primary who models Ravenclaw or the other way around and the questions on the quiz were too abstract to be helpful
Both the questions and the official descriptions, while helpful, are indeed vague. It always helps me to ‘see’ a House (or anything else) in ‘action’ in an actual person or a fictional character, in order for me to wrap my head around what someone of that House ‘looks like.’ They had a great many examples on their tumblr page until it was accidentally deleted / purged which helped me -- you kind of need to think about what each House values and represents, and then see them in a character that manifests those traits. Which is what I try to do when I write up my ‘Sorting’ posts (on my blog, previously linked) -- show how this character differs and how they might disagree with someone from another House, because of their primary focus.
But all of that is rather abstract too, isn’t it? ;)
Bottom line. Are you a Katniss Everdeen or a Luke Skywalker?
When you consider Slytherin, think about Katniss. What is her #1 priority in life? Her sister, Prim. She volunteers as Tribute so her sister does not have to go into the arena. She is willing to run off with Prim and Gale (another “chosen” family member) into the woods, and let the rest of society fend for itself, because at least her prioritized people, those to whom she is most loyal, would be safe. Katniss cares nothing for most of the other Tributes, but she adopts Rue in the arena, because Rue reminds her of Prim. She hunts for Prim. She tolerates the big orange cat that she hates for Prim. She does everything... for Prim, and later, for Peeta, once she has invited him into her small circle of ‘caring.’
For Slytherins, it’s MY people. MY family. MY city. MY country. It’s possessive, and personal, and it would gut them not to feel a sense of responsibility to prioritize THEIR people. If they were on their way to help a friend or a sibling and they ignored someone stuck in the ditch that tried to flag them down, there would be no guilt, because My People Come First. Always. That’s how they are wired. If this is only a ‘Model,’ it will be dropped like a hot potato the minute things get rough, and the person will feel no guilt. But the Slytherin would feel enormous guilt at not putting their people FIRST.
The Ravenclaw is not a loyalist house, but an idealist house. The Jedi Code is a perfect example of a Ravenclaw system -- it asks the Jedi to abandon their own instinctual feelings and gut impulses and live according to a set of high idealistic rules. Their expectations are lofty and their chosen system is something they live by, because they have created or adopted it to take the place of emotionalism. The Ravenclaw might craft ‘it is good to defend and prioritize one’s family’ into their system, but it would come from a place of intellect more than emotion. Luke Skywalker is a good example of this -- of a man who chooses to live by the Code of the Jedi, but who also crafts and shapes it more to his own form. Luke, being a compassionate individual, adds such things as love and mercy to his own version of the Code. And he lives that out. Kylo Ren is also another Ravenclaw, who is rejecting his own emotions in an attempt to live up to an ideal -- for much of the first two movies, a bad ideal, but a system he believes in (the Dark Side of the Force, and a renouncement of his feelings) and tries to enforce on other people through persuading them to join him (Rey).
Fortunately, being a Ravenclaw also means that when he sees another, better way to be (again, through Rey’s influence and her healing him)... he can discard the old system without a second thought, without guilt, and adopt an entirely new one. That is the skill and talent of the Ravenclaw. To forever be tinkering with what they hold to be true, and what they live by. If they find out their system is flat out wrong, irrational, corrupt, or immoral, most Ravenclaws will abandon it. Like Kylo Ren, they will toss the broken lightsaber into the sea and go build a new one. (The lightsaber being their “I live by these principles.”) These ideals come from the outside and their own tinkering, but they aren’t instinctively felt. Unlike the Slytherin, they do not go by emotions -- they go by what they have chosen to be.
As previously mentioned, I know a Slytherin. She always had a deep abiding affection for Katniss, because she understood her completely. When The Hunger Games first came out, and I was struggling to understand why she liked it so much (I found it incredibly depressing and morbid), she just said, “I would do that for my sister.” Years later, when she was taking the Sorting Hat test, I knew she would come out a Slytherin, because... she is Katniss. But the difference between us was distinctive. She would rush to defend, to protect, to be loyal to, and I would sit back and analyze the situation from a detached viewpoint, ignoring any emotions I might be having in the process... because I am constantly weighing everything against my logical reasoning and my faith. It’s as simple as that. Of course my family comes first, but my faith also says to treat everyone with kindness and “do unto others what you would have them do unto you.” So there is always a push-pull in me between instinct (my family, not MY family) and everyone else, according to my belief system.
Consequently, if you want an idea of what a Hufflepuff looks like, look no further than Rey Skywalker. She may be a little grouchy and standoffish, but she also stands up for and defends... everyone. She has a collective emotional loyalty to the entire human race. She protects BB8. She protects Finn. She attaches herself easily to Han Solo, then to the mission to find Luke, then to the Rebellion, and finally, she even sees the potential for good and healing in Kylo Ren. Everyone is fair in her mind, everyone is equal, it would never occur to her to prioritize a select few over the greater good. Hufflepuff values.
And Leia, of course, is a Gryffindor. Someone who has found her Cause and intends to champion it, and you can come along for the ride or get the hell out of her way. She and Han, a Slytherin, butt heads a lot, because he has no interest in a Cause, until he attaches himself to her. Then her Cause becomes his Cause, in a truly Slytherin fashion -- what matters to My People, matters to me. She trusts her gut and does whatever it tells her to do, and entertains no turning aside for anyone. She will stand alone if she must.
You need to ask yourself, who am I? What do I trust? And what would gut me to ignore? My loved ones? Slytherin. My system and logic? Ravenclaw. My general concern for humanity? Hufflepuff. My gut instincts? Gryffindor. What are you willing to do in your life? Sacrifice other things to maintain and cultivate your intimate relationships? Slytherin. Abandon belief systems that you know to be erroneous without a second thought? Ravenclaw. Defend everyone who cannot defend themselves? Hufflepuff. Walk away from your entire family and friendship group on a matter of principle? Gryffindor. Who, by the way, do you ‘understand’ on a completely instinctual level? My Slytherin friend understood Katniss. My Hufflepuff friend understands Hufflepuffs. I understand Ravenclaws like Kylo Ren, because I get his struggle. It’s familiar to me. And my Gryffindor father understands Gryffindors and in true Gryffindor fashion, thinks cowardice is unforgivable. 
51 notes · View notes
anonthenullifier · 4 years ago
Note
Hiii!!! I just finished reading your Snapshots fic on ao3 and they're all amazing!!! I love how you write the family dynamics between the kids and wanda/vision, they're all vv sweet and I'm here for it!! Do u think tommy and billy ever did a parent trap kind of switch for some reason?
Thank you so much! 😁 This was a fun ask and I hope you enjoy! 
***
The sizzle of butter in the skillet provides a lively accompaniment to Wanda’s aggravation about the morning’s latest headline - one claiming that Tony Stark was personally responsible for the matchmaking that brought Vision and his lovely, currently scarlet eyed, wife together. It’s a claim not without some merit, if not for Tony’s involvement in Ultron’s creation and then in Vision’s own birth, he never would have been alive to fall so deeply in love with Wanda; however, as with most claims involving Tony it is also inherently hyperbolic. Had the billionaire actually been involved in Vision’s romantic pursuits, there is a very high probability that Wanda would have run the other direction.
“And you know what else it said?”
Vision scoops the pancake batter carefully into the buttered skillet as he responds, “What?”
“That he’s the reason Billy and Tommy want to be Avengers.” The only reason Wanda’s tea does not spill over the edge as she gesticulates out her anger is because she has wrapped it in a sheen of red. “Him!”
Grandiose sense of self worth is a rather glaring fault in the Stark family, a symptom Vision thankfully bypassed, no doubt due to the humble yet confident influence of Dr. Cho. “It is an unfair and misleading statement,” this diffuses her ire enough for her to take a sip of tea, “all that truly matters,” momentarily he turns from the stove to wrap his fingers around her upper arms and stare intently into her eyes, “is that we continue encouraging our sons to be their best selves, even if our work is never publicly acknowledged.”
Finally her face softens, the disdain etched into the lines of her forehead smoothing out with the roll of her eyes, “Fine.” Vision lays a peck to her forehead before turning back to rescue the almost burnt pancakes, “but wouldn’t it be nice if someone praised us for once?”
“It would.”
“Morning mom, dad.”
“Good morning Bil…” Vision’s mouth stops mid-greeting, brain a bit frenzied at the mixed signals he is receiving. The voice that just greeted him registers as Billy and yet the boy in front of him is sporting Tommy’s signature snowy hair and athletic clothing. “Um…”
“Tommy,” Wanda’s acknowledgement of their son should clarify everything, yet he can sense an odd amusement in the way she says the name, “why don’t you sit down, your father’s almost done with breakfast.”
To further add to the confusion of the moment, Tommy merely flashes them a grin (no snarky comment nor demands for it to cook faster) and then slides into Billy’s seat at the table.
Wanda’s hand comes to rest on Vision’s back, her voice low and a bit giddy, “This is going to be entertaining.”
“What is?”
“Just wait…” No further information is provided other than a wink.
Vision attempts to shove his curiosity and need to ask for more clarity down, instead channeling all of his energy into the pancakes and not burning them. Success at this repression endeavor is fleeting, the moment he turns to put the plate on the table, he cannot help but ask a question. “Where is your brother?” A glance up confirms it is three minutes past their usual breakfast time. Billy, like Vision, believes in punctuality and that being five minutes early is on time and being on time is late. For him to be late by normative standards is concerning. “It is unlike him to be late.”
Tommy chokes on his orange juice, eyes a tad wild as he twists around to look at the clock. “Um, I’ll go-“
“Good morning everyone!” Billy waltzes in with a cheery grin, his overall presence gregarious and brash, neither a word typically associated with him. His unusual mood  is highlighted all the more by  the uncharacteristically sloppy way his sweater is buttoned. “I’m famished.” A sentiment rarely shared by Billy.
Vision is torn between staring at his sons and seeking out Wanda’s reaction to whatever is happening in their kitchen. “Tommy,” his brother's name is overly enunciated, and the question, “Why are you in my seat?” asked with annoyance.
“Oh, sorry,” Tommy apologizes quickly, a first for sure, and then slides over to his normal chair.
This is, for want of a better word, weird.
Wanda, somehow, is making everyday small talk with their sons but Vision doesn’t process what is said, too focused on studying his children and the bevy of possibilities for why they seem so off. The initial fear is that they are Skrulls or some other shape shifting creature, a possibility they have sadly lived through before, not with the boys but on a mission with the Avengers. A vitals and physiology scan disconfirms this hypothesis (thankfully), the two bodies across the table are his sons. Despite this Tommy is eating at a snail’s pace, knife and fork working with precise movements to portion out perfect sized bites while Billy is going fast and loose with his fork, each bite different from the last. It also seems like Billy’s hair is a slightly different shade than usual, a tinge of cinnamon in his typically chestnut hair. Perhaps they have wandered into the multiverse yet again, though Wanda is his Wanda, he is certain of that and she seems to be more amused than concerned. Which means there must be a logical explanation.
Vision decides perhaps listening to the conversation at the table will better aid him. “Are you ready for the big math test today?” This is directed at Tommy, a pre-algebra exam Vision has spent several nights helping him study for.
Contrary to the numerous breakdowns that informed Vision that his son was going to fail so why bother trying, this morning Tommy seems...optimistic. “Yeah, dad’s prepared me well,” and overtly gracious.
“And Billy,” Wanda nudges Vision’s foot as she talks, always a sign he needs to get out of his head and pay attention, “today’s the mile run in gym, right?”
“Yep,” Billy answers while shoving a pancake into his mouth, continuing to talk while he chews, “gonna beat my record for sure.” This comment, and the smarmy confidence behind it, sets a new hypothesis into motion.  
Vision runs a second vitals scan, this time focusing on heart rate and brain waves. The results are surprising yet informative, but just to be sure, he recalibrates his sensors, scans again, and re-analyzes it, not wanting to make an erroneous conclusion if his sensors were off. The results match his last scan and the oddities suddenly make sense. Finally figured it out? He turns towards Wanda, her face set with impish victory typically reserved for when she bests him at training. A dip of his chin affirms her telepathic comment though his own mood is nowhere near as bubbly as hers because despite knowing the truth now, it does not actually alleviate any of his concern, in fact it breeds several other pathways of uncertainty. Follow my lead.  
The devious undertone of his wife’s comment transforms into an innocent smile as she addresses their sons. “Well boys,” both of their sons look up, “since it’s such a big day, we should celebrate later.” A shared look occurs between Billy and Tommy, one that Vision can’t quite label appropriately, a mix of excitement, bafflement, and victory.
‘Billy’ prods for more, his fork tapping the plate at roughly 200 clinks per minute. “Like what?”
Wanda is so natural at uncovering their lies that Vision can only sit back in awe at the way she effortlessly teases out the truth, “I need to meet with Strange later today, so Billy you can come along and we can ask if he’s finally willing to start training you to be a sorcerer.”
The current Tommy stares mouth agape at the offer, while the current Billy seems unimpressed, “Oh, um yeah, that’d be cool.”
“And Tommy,” Wanda reaches out to grab Vision’s hand, a gesture that is blissfully common but is right now no doubt meant to really drive home the offer, “Your father was going to do some speed trials this afternoon, maybe he can call the school so you can leave a period early and join him.” Vision was not going to do this but he withholds that knowledge so he doesn’t hinder his wife’s plan.
Tommy and Billy turn towards each other, no verbal words exchanged but Vision can easily recognize one of their telepathic conversations—bodies tense, their faces fluttering through a range of emotions, and eyebrows moving in emphasis of whatever comments they’re making. They break and ‘Tommy’ addresses the offer, “Billy has gym in 8th period.”
“Which is why he and I are going to meet with Stephen after school.” Wanda takes a deliberately long sip of her tea to let the information really settle in.
Their tactics switch to the other offer.“Isn’t uh truancy a pretty big deal, you know, if I,” ‘Billy’ catches himself, “Tommy were to leave early.
Vision decides he should aid in some way, voice matter of fact as he responds, “I do believe Tommy has a free period at that time. Plus,” thankfully this next part is not a lie or else Vision would feel guilty saying it, “I have to attend the PTA meeting tonight so we cannot wait until school is out if we would like to get a full session of training in.”
Another deep, very animated mental conversation occurs across the table, one that leads to an exaggerated roll of his wife’s eyes. “What if…”
Wanda cuts off the next suggestion, clearly done with the game, “Just accept that you’ve been caught.”
The two faces across from them are polar opposite, one shining with defiance and the other defeat. With a sigh, Tommy’s white hair darkens into chestnut, the real Billy slouching deep into his chair. His brother is not amused, “Are you really breaking that easily?”
Vision checks the time, noting their bus will arrive in less than 10 minutes. “Boys,” there are several things he wants to say, from questioning Tommy’s brown hair to why they thought they’d get away with it, but he decides those can wait, “perhaps instead of our planned celebrations tonight, we have a discussion on the harms of deception.”
Tommy, the real one, executes a perfect Maximoff eye roll, never one to appreciate the life lesson evenings that correspond with poor behavior. “It was just a joke.”
“I do not find it humorous.” And Vision does not, a deep despair blossoming in his chest at what his sons have attempted and what it means for how their sons view them, whether they think they are not loved enough nor noticed enough to be recognized by their own parents. “You intended to utilize this...joke for personal gain.”
Wanda cuts in, hand coming to rest on Vision’s thigh with a light, reassuring squeeze. “Why don’t you both change. The bus will be here soon. We’ll talk more tonight.” Muttered yes, mom s are lost in the scraping of their chairs against the wooden floor. “Tommy.”
“Yeah?”
“Did you dye your hair?”
“Yep,” Tommy runs his hand through his darkened locks, “the box called it chili chocolate.”
Wanda smirks, finding this far more endearing than Vision. “Just promise to use it responsibly.”
A not fully convincing salute goes along with Tommy’s, “Roger that,” and then he runs off in a blur.
“Wanda,” Vision waits until she looks at him, a bit unnerved that she does not seem to show any of the same concern for what just happened. “Are you not troubled at their flagrant disregard for honesty?”
Her eyebrows arch up, lips pursed the way they are whenever he has misassessed human nature and she needs to find a way to gently talk him through it. “It’s kind of a twin rite of passage.”
This is not forthcoming nor satisfying. “Did you and Pietro do this as well?”
“Once or twice.” His confusion must be evident, her lips curving up into a reminiscent mischief. “We weren’t good at it, especially once we were older. But you have to try.”
“Do you?”
A nod confirms the apparent necessity of such an experiment, though no further explanation is provided for Vision to comprehend why it is required. “You’ve never seen the Parent Trap, have you?”
“I have not.”
Scarlet energy entangles itself around the dishes at the table, floating them into the sink and away from their responsibility for now. “Come on,” Wanda stands and tugs on Vision’s hand, drawing him up out of his seat and then leading him into the living room. As she lightly pushes him to sit in the couch, a rush of feet, a banging door and a quick bye! marks the start of the school day, leaving them alone until this afternoon. “Want to watch a movie?”
“I suppose,” he wraps his arm around her shoulders after she sits next to him, pulling her closer and relishing the comfort of her head on his chest, “if it provides adequate research to understanding this cultural necessity of deceit, then yes.”
“And if it doesn’t?”
Vision considers the comment a touch longer than needed, just enough for her to look up at him in anticipation, “if it means a day spent with you,” he kisses her deeply, mirroring the soft curve of her lips as he pulls away,”then it is still a yes.”
“Good.” The tv turns on and his education begins.
18 notes · View notes
fydream · 5 years ago
Text
Tumblr media
34 | previous | next | m.list | main m.list |
Tumblr media
✰ how to be a heartbreaker
↳ so what happens when park jisung, the school’s infamous fuckboy runs into the new girl at school? out of boredom he decides it’ll be fun to have someone new to play with, but little does he know, she’s learning how to be a heartbreaker.
Tumblr media
a/n: hi! an authors note before this chapter begins! 1. yes i know the formatting is different but that’s only because this chapter is 5.9k words long!! (yes you heard me!! 5.9k!! that’s the most ive written for anything published on this blog!!) so there will be a cut bc i know it’s annoying to scroll past long posts haha. 2. i know i didn’t mention it in this chapter but i just wanted to say that if you did want to listen to music while reading this, during y/n and jisung’s scene you should definitely listen to euphoria by bts and that jeno and donghyuck’s song is i.l.y. by the rose. i hope u guys enjoy!
Tumblr media
An hour or so later you're running out your front door to meet Jisung, who already regrets saying he'll wait.
"I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry-" You apologize. "I didn't mean to take that long you must've been bored out of your mind!"
"It's okay." Jisung reassures. "We won't be there that long, we might be a little late to hoco if that's okay with you."
"That's fine!! Just let me text Donghyuck that I'm with you then."
"Okay."
The ride to where Jisung is taking you is quiet, nothing but his various hums to the music he plays as as he drives. It's nice, it reminds you of the first time he gave you a ride home. Quiet, but comfortable.
Instead of looking at your phone you look out the window, then take a second to look at Jisung before looking back out the window again.
You so weren't slick about it either because he notices how you quick you look away and how eager you are to sneak another glance.
"What?" He asks. "Why'd you look at me like that?"
"It's nothing.." You mumble, trying best to hide the smile that's slowly creeping up on your face.
"C'mon." He insists. "Tell me!!" He tries to make it sound like he doesn't care about the topic that much, but his vocal chords work against him as it comes out as a whine.
"Nothing.. It's just.. You look like that, and I look like this.."
"What, you mean beautiful like always?"
Jisung makes note of how quickly your cheeks turn pink at the comment he made.
"You can't just say that!" You argue.
"Yes I can, you're my date tonight after all. What kind of person would I be to not compliment their date?"
You open your mouth, about to speak before he cuts you off from your thought. "And don't worry y/n. I'll take that look as a compliment itself." He snickers.
"Hey!" You shout, earning another laugh from him.
"Hey Jisung?" You ask once the giggles die down.
"Hm?"
"Don't tell anyone I've said this but um.." You start, trailing off at the last part. "Donghyuck has uh, told me things.. about you." You notice how he looks at you, how the expression on his face quickly changes from happy and carefree, to concerned and worried. "I know you probably know what I'm talking about.. I uh- I can kinda.. tell.."
"Yeah." He whispers, trying to block out what you just told him.
"But y'know. I think he's got you all wrong."
"You do?" He asks, a bit too eagerly.
"I do." You say. "From the past how many weeks? Of knowing you, we've gotten close. And I don't think you're anything like that, at least, not anymore.. I've seen the difference between how you act in class and when you're with Jeno and Jaemin, than how you are when we're together and I'd like to hope it isn't just an act. I'm not stupid, y'know."
"I never said you were, I never thought you were either."
"I know. You're not too hard to read, y'know."
For once, Jisung is left speechless. This is the first time anyone has really brought this up on him and he has no idea how to respond. Questions begin to flood his thoughts as he begins to wonder what do you know. Do you know the real reason why he asked you out? How long have you known? What if you never want to talk to him again?
"I-" He tries to speak, but nothing comes out.
"It's okay. I don't know everything about you." You scoff, watching as the boy next to you lets out an exhale. "I don't know that much, but I know enough."
"Enough?" He asks.
"Enough to know that if you are going to break my heart, you should do it right now. Because this is the part where I'm about to tell you how much I like you, and I don't want you getting that satisfaction."
Once you're done talking, you give him a smile. It's a small, innocent, bittersweet smile. It's one of the smiles you would give out to other girls who were ever mean to you, it's subtle, but it gets the point across.
"So what'll be? Park Jisung." You ask, awaiting a response.
Jisung has many things to think about right now, the most important one being driving. He still has yet to process everything you just told him, let alone figure out what to say.
"I.. don't know what to tell you, y/n." He sighs. "I don't want to hurt you.. Can you give me a few minutes?"
"You can have all the time in the world, sweetheart."
Tumblr media
When Jisung finally decides to talk to you once you've reached your destination. If you're going to be honest, it was the most awkward car ride you've been in.
"Okay." He starts, closing his car door. "I know that was way more than a few minutes but I just wanted to tell you this here."
The spot that he had taken you to was a little hill area, on the other side of town. From the top of it you could see the sun set as it's golden rays covered the place you called home. You weren't going to lie, it was beautiful indeed but you didn't care for it at the moment. What you wanted to know was what he was going to say.
"I was.. gonna tell you this here no matter what happened so uh.. Here goes nothing?" There's hesitation, and you can already tell that whatever he was going to tell you was something big. "I'm not here to break your heart, y/n. I know, that's what you thought and probably what everyone else thought too but.. you're different. I know this."
Your brain wants you to call bullshit on that statement but your heart prevents you from doing so. The logical part of you believes that it's probably all a lie, an act just to get you to fall for him. You know this. You know the stories, you've seen the receipts of what he's done to people before you, and you can only assume the things he'll do just to make you fall for him. But if you knew this, then why does it still work?
"Am I really different?" You ask, looking up at him with shaky eyes.
He chuckles.
"Well, yeah. For starters, you're the first girl to ever call me out on my bullshit like that so.." He jokes. "I know.. you're scared. But you shouldn't be." He whispers. "You really are different. I promise."
"Listen, Jisung." You start. "I really want to believe you. It's just hard, because you haven't really given me a reason on why I should."
"That's okay. I understand." He says softly. "I didn't expect you to."
For a second, your heart breaks. It would've continued if he didn't continue talking right then and there.
"But what if I told you all the reasons why you should?" He asks, giving you a shy smile.
"What are they?"
"Well first of all. You're smart. You're smarter than I'll ever be. You've figured me out in what? The span of three months? You don't give yourself enough credit than you deserve. Second of all, you're really passionate about a lot of things. Like that time we argued in the library over the best Stranger Things season? Even though you were wrong, you kept arguing against me."
"Hey!" You exclaim, while Jisung gives you a smile in response.
"Third of all, you're really cute. Don't think I don't notice how your nose scrunches whenever I make a comment you don't like, or how easily you get excited over the simplest things. Remember when we walked to the cafe across the street from school? You got excited because the place had good boba, out of all things. Do you know how ridiculous you sounded?"
"Well- yeah! That's because it was a cafe! And not a boba shop!" You defend.
"I'm kidding." He chuckles. "Also, did you know that whenever you get embarrassed over something not only your cheeks turn pink, but your nose does too."
"You can stop now.. y'know.." You mumble.
"These are just a few things that I like about you, y/n. Do I need to tell you all of them for you to believe me?" He asks, looking at you innocently, as if he didn't just give you the biggest ego boost of all time.
"I believe you." You giggle as he pulls you in for a tight hug.
"Thanks, love." He whispers, placing a light kiss on the top of your head. "Now it's your turn. What were you going to tell me in the car?"
The next hour or so is spent with you two talking about each other, both of you giving out compliments as if there were no tomorrow. If it weren't for the sun being completely gone then you two probably wouldn't have noticed how long you've been alone together.
"Oh my god." Jisung exclaims. "What time is it?"
"Uhm.. Seven fifteen?" You respond, quite confused on why he was suddenly freaking out.
"We have to go, now. They're going to close the doors in like ten minutes."
"Oh. Okay!" You smile, eagerly skipping back to Jisung's car with his hand intertwined with yours. "We better get going then, huh?"
Tumblr media
"Y/n said that she might be late because she's with Jisung already." Donghyuck tells Renjun and Chenle once pull up in front of his house.
Renjun had driven both of them together due to them only being a block away from each other. Donghyuck on the other hand was going to drive you, but when you texted him that you were already with Jisung he decided to ask Renjun for a ride. "Sorry for the inconvenience.. by the way." He mumbles, buckling his seat belt.
"It's alright. Where do you think they went?" Renjun asks.
"Hell if I know. This is the most I've seen Jisung do for anyone." Donghyuck retorts, clearly bitter about being ditched by his best friend.
"Should we be worried?" Chenle asks.
"I don't think so." Donghyuck responds. "Y/n is her own person and she can handle herself, plus what the fuck is Jisung even gonna do? They probably went to take pictures or something."
Chenle shrugs. "I guess so. How are you doing then?"
"What do you mean?"
Chenle shrugs again. "You know what I mean. During the time you two fought you barely said anything to each other, it was just her hanging out with Jisung. Then, even after you made up she ditched us to hang out with him and even now they're probably on a date before the dance or something. How are you dealing with it?"
Once Chenle is done talking, Renjun shoots him a glare before hitting him lightly on the back of his head.
"Ouchie.. That hurt!" Chenle whines. "Aren't you supposed to be driving Junnie.~~" He teases.
"Yeah but I'm also trying to make sure no one fucking cries tonight." He hisses. "Why would you even ask that?"
"I dunno. Was curious I guess?"
"Haven't you heard the phrase curiosity killed the cat?"
"It's been alright." Donghyuck says to prevent Renjun from harming Chenle any more. "I haven't really thought about it I guess? I mean.. I was the one who assigned her to Jisung after all so.."
"Do you think she y'know? Likes him?" He asks.
"Chenle!"
"Whaaaat?? I'm just asking."
"Zhong Chenle you will drop this topic before I stop this car and make you walk to homecoming alone."
"You wouldn't do that. You love me too much."
"Don't try me." Renjun threatens, turning on his blinker.
"Okay okay.. god.."
"Are you two done arguing now?" Donghyuck asks, rolling his eyes. "And no, Chenle. I don't think she does. If she did she would've told me by now."
"Alright Hyuck.. Whatever you say."
Sooner than later the three arrive at school where Renjun drops off Chenle and Donghyuck to hop in the line already forming before leaving to park his car.
"Ask any more questions Lele, and you're walking home." Renjun threatens before Chenle slams the car door on him.
"I mean it this time!" Renjun yells as he watches the two boys walk away from him.
"So." Chenle starts as Renjun drives off. "What's your answer?"
Donghyuck gives him a confused look. "Answer?"
"To y'know.. the question."
"I already told you."
"No silly, I meant your real answer."
Donghyuck is silent for a second before he decides to answer.
"How did you know?" He asks, and Chenle giggles.
"You just told me." He laughs. "I didn't think you'd walk into that one, Hyuck."
"Oh shut up." Donghyuck teases. "It's not like it would matter or anything."
"I supposed you're right." Chenle hums. "But if it did.. Then what?"
"Then I'd tell her to get out of there." Donghyuck whispers to himself.
"Hm?"
"Oh- uh, nothing. I dunno." Donghyuck responds. He knows he has no chance in fooling Chenle but even after that response you'd know not to bother him about the topic anymore.
Once Renjun is done parking he meets up with the two boys and they discuss about how their night will go. While the line slowly moves Renjun argues with Chenle that they should take photos first. Chenle argues back saying that he wants snacks and that all the good ones will be gone if they wait too long. While this goes on Donghyuck has been sending you frequent texts.
[hyuck: hey! we're in line now! see you in a bit?]
[hyuck: are you on your way soon?]
[hyuck: pls hurry.. renle fighting.. dk what to do..]
Needless to say, you haven't responded to any one of them, leaving Donghyuck wonder what you were even doing.
After successfully waiting in line and making it through their schools quick security check, Chenle, Renjun, and Donghyuck had finally made it inside the gymnasium where the dance was being held.
Once inside they move to an quieter place, where they could talk without having to yell over the already loud music that's being played.
"What about you Hyuck?" Renjun asks. "What do you want to do first?"
"Hmm? What? Sorry." Donghyuck responds, checking his phone once more before pocketing it. "What's happening?"
Renjun frowns. "You weren't listening, huh?"
"No, sorry." He apologizes. "Y/n hasn't texted me back yet and I don't want to do anything until she gets here y'know?"
"Don't worry Hyuck, it's possible they're still outside or something. They just opened the doors y'know."
"Yeah I know.. I'm just.. yeah."
Tumblr media
Ten minutes later, you still haven't responded and the music is loud, but it's not loud enough to drown out Donghyuck's heartbeat as he frantically awaits your arrival. As each second passes by he begins to regret letting you go with Jisung, because you're never late, but the second that he lets Jisung control how your night starts you're ten minutes late and they're be closing the doors to the dance soon.
Renjun begins to notice that you aren't here either and decides walk over to Donghyuck to ask if he knew where you were.
"Hyuck, is Y/n here yet?" He asks, tapping his shoulder lightly.
Donghyuck gives no verbal response, instead he shakes his head while he fiddles with his phone checking back if you happened to text him. "I don't know where she is Junnie.."
"Hey, it's okay." He reassures. "It's not like she's in danger or anything, I know you don't trust Jisung that much but I doubt he'd do anything to hurt her. She'll be here soon, okay? I promise."
"Junnie~~" Chenle whines, popping up from behind them. "I'm boredddd. Can't we just do something already?"
"Lele, not now." Renjun shoos. "We're talking here."
"It's okay." Donghyuck says. "You guys can go do something, it's fine. I don't want to keep you from having fun tonight."
"Are you sure?" Renjun asks, he knows not to believe Donghyuck but he's getting quite annoyed at the fact that Chenle keeps pulling at his arm.
"Yeah. It's fine, if anything happens I'll text one of you."
"You heard him!! Let's go!!" Chenle exclaims before grabbing Renjun by the arm to drag him to god knows where.
"Chenle!" Renjun yelps. "I-I'll text you Hyuck! We won't be gone for long. I swear!" He yells back at him.
And then the two were gone. Leaving Donghyuck alone, by himself.
One of the worst feelings in the world is feeling alone, in a place full of people.
He doesn't know why he let them go off without him, maybe it's because he wanted to be alone, or maybe it's because he didn't know any better. But standing alone on the sides of a school dance, with no one to talk to really shows how lonely you are. He knows none of you meant to do it to him on purpose, it's just him overthinking things after all. But if he was okay with them leaving, then why did it hurt?
Deciding it was awkward enough to just stand there and people watch, Donghyuck decides to go back on his phone. He checks your text messages only to see no response. "Great." He thinks to himself. "You said you would be here, but you're not. I guess you did spend a lot of time with them after all."
Donghyuck feels himself about to cry when someone taps his shoulder. He closes his eyes trying to fight back the few tears that threaten to spill before having to talk to whoever was with him. He didn't want to answer any questions on why he was crying, only knowing that if someone asked him if he was okay he wouldn't be able to control them.
When Donghyuck looks up from his phone, the last person he expected to see is standing in front of him.
"Hi." Jeno greets. It's short, and airy. But it's just enough to get his heart racing. Is it from fear? Worry? Or is it from the fact that his ex, just so happened to catch him at the wrong place and wrong time.
"Hi." Donghyuck responds. It doesn't mean much because he didn't put any emotion into it, instead he decides to focus his attention elsewhere. He looks past Jeno towards the entrance of the gymnasium in hopes of seeing you walk in, spoiler alert, you didn't. "Chenle and Renjun picked the worst time to leave.." He thinks to himself. "I can't blame them though, after all I did tell them it was okay."
"You um- You look beautiful." Jeno compliments, giving Donghyuck a half-hearted smile. "So I've been told.." Donghyuck murmurs before attempting to push past the boy standing in front of him. "Listen. I don't have any time for this right now. Y/n said she would be here and she's not so-"
"Hyuck- Donghyuck, wait." Jeno starts, grabbing Donghyuck's wrist to prevent him from going any further.
"What the fuck? Let go of me!" He yells. It's loud enough to get the attention of a few people around him, but the music the DJ is playing is way to loud for them to have heard what he said.
"Hyuckie, I- Will you please let me explain?" Jeno practically begs, this is the first time that he and Donghyuck have interacted in person since the break up and he can already tell that he's blowing it.
"Don't- Don't call me that." Donghyuck states, hesitant to answer. "You've already explained yourself enough."
"Hyuckie.. Please. We haven't talked in months, you haven't let me say anything."
Of course, Jeno had to find Donghyuck in one of these moments, where one of their songs was being played by the DJ. It was one of the songs that Jeno had showed him, meaning it left such a big impact on his heart. He doesn't know what to do, does he accept Jeno's offer and let him explain? Or does he continue the rest of his high school career pretending that Jeno doesn't exist, leaving many questions unanswered.
Panic starts to fill Donghyuck as he looks around to see if anyone had noticed him and Jeno together. It would cause a bunch of talk, considering that fact that they were both pretty popular and that teenagers loved to start rumors.
He notices Jaemin as he spots Jeno from across the room, by the way Jaemin is walking towards them he can tell that he was looking for Jeno himself, clearly unhappy and very confused where he found him. He glances back at the entrance for a split second before looking towards the direction that his two friends had gone off in, only to see them walking back towards him, just as confused as Jaemin is. He can see the concern rise in Renjun once he sees who Donghyuck is with, as he grabs Chenle's arm to drag him across the makeshift dance floor that their school has created, where Chenle had decided to stop to talk to a few friends.
He looks back towards the entrance and to his luck he sees you and Jisung walk in. Thankful, he lets out a sigh of relief because he sees that you're here and that you're safe. He notices the smile that you have on your face and though he was a bit far away he can tell it's a genuine smile, like one of the one's you would show him when it was just you two hanging out. "I guess I worried for nothing." He thinks to himself, as he watches you two skip in, hands intertwined.
And amongst all this commotion happening at once, his ex, out of all people had to come up to him and ask him a question he knew he wouldn't be able to answer. So what does he do? He panics, of course.
"Oh my fucking god.." Donghyuck mumbles to no one in particular. Jeno seems to hear it but he doesn't process it because he's too busy being dragged by Donghyuck who was attempting to blend in with the big group of people who happened to pass by.
When Renjun, Chenle, and Jaemin end up where Donghyuck and Jeno were previously standing they're left more confused on where the two went. Though it's loud, Donghyuck manages to pick out Renjun's voice yell "What the fuck?" over a crowd of teenagers.
Donghyuck smiles to himself, knowing that he successfully got away. He didn't think it'd work, he'd only seen it in movies before and you know what people say, it's just movie magic after all.
"Where are we going?" Jeno asks innocently.
"Outside." Donghyuck responds, leading their way towards the "exit" sign on the other side of the gymnasium.
"Why?" Jeno asks once more, and Donghyuck turns around just to shoot him a glare.
"So no one. fucking. sees us." He grits through his teeth.
Needless to say, Jeno doesn't ask any more questions after that.
Tumblr media
"Where is everyone?" You ask Jisung through the fit of giggles you let out.
"I dunno. Jeno isn't answering his phone so I'll call Jaemin, yeah?" He responds, just as giddy as you are.
"Oh, I was talking about Renjun, Chenle, and Hyuck."
"You can hang with us for a bit!" Jisung insists.
"I know but I haven't seen them all day." You pout. "I'll hang out with you after!! Besides, they're my best friends after all. How would you feel if I took you away from Jeno and Jaemin?"
"My dear you're allowed to do that any day of the week. I like you better than them anyways." He teases.
"Oh shut up. You know what I meant." You snort. "Can we just go find them please?"
"Yeah, hold on- Hi Jaemin!" Jisung says through his phone. "What? Sorry.. I can't really hear you. Is that Renjun? Why is he yelling at you?"
Your ears perk up hearing the name of your friend leave Jisung's mouth. "Renjun?" You ask, looking at him curious. "Are they okay?"
Jisung nods at you while trying to hear what Jaemin has to say, it's hard considering the fact that there's not only loud music coming from his phone speakers but the voice of an angry boy as well, and to add onto that, the same music being played just a couple feet away from you.
Pouting, you look at him. Jisung can tell you're worried about your friends by the way that your pupils shake as he pulls you into another tight hug, hoping to ease a bit of the worry.
From then you can kind of make out the conversation on the phone, it's something about Jeno and Donghyuck being together then suddenly disappearing out of thin air, like a magic trick.
"Where are you?" Jisung asks.
"We're in one of the back corners." Jaemin yells through his phone. "The uhh.. One on the right, your left."
"Okay. We're on our way." Jisung says before hanging up.
"I guess our night of fun had to end somewhere." He tells you before you two head further into the gymnasium to meet up with your friends.
Once you meet up with the three boys you're greeted with a hug from Chenle while you watch as Renjun and Jaemin argue.
"So they were right here?" You ask tapping Renjun's shoulder.
"Yeah. And then all of a sudden they disappeared." He says, quite frantically.
"Y'know worrying isn't going to do anything." Jaemin taunts.
"Yeah! And you making snarky comments doesn't help either!" Renjun shoots back.
"Can you two stop bickering a second?" Chenle snaps, surprising all of you. "We have no idea where the fuck they went and for the past five minutes all you two have done is argue? Why haven't we checked anywhere yet?"
"Because, Lele. They could be anywhere. We're in a room full of teenagers." Renjun states.
"For once, I agree with this one." Jaemin adds on, earning a glare from Renjun and a facepalm from Jisung.
"Okay? And? Have you ever thought about the fact that they could y'know, be outside?" Chenle asks.
"Why would they be outside?" You ask.
"Because it's loud in here, and it looked like they wanted to talk."
Tumblr media
"So.." Jeno says, swinging his legs back and forth. He was currently seated on top of one of the picnic tables your school had, while Donghyuck was standing across from him, leaning against the corner of a wall.
"You said you would explain, so explain." Donghyuck states.
Jeno takes a deep breath as he stops swinging his legs, he looks at the ground before looking up towards Donghyuck who was already looking at him, clearly annoyed at the fact that Jeno was stalling.
"It was a dare." He starts, before Donghyuck cuts him off.
"Yes I know. We all know." He spits.
"But theres more." Jeno says once again. "As you know, Jisung dared me to ask you out and me, being the asshole I was back then, I agreed and decided to do so.." He pauses for a second. Trying to think of what to say next.
"Listen are you gonna keep stopping or are you going to tell the story?" Donghyuck comments, it's only been two minutes and he's already fed up with Jeno's bullshit.
"I am. I'm just trying to think about the right words to say."
"Why? So that I can fall back in love with you?"
"No, Hyuckie-"
"I said, don't call me that."
"Why?"
"Because Jeno!" Donghyuck yells, voice cracking as he tries to control the same tears from earlier from falling. "I am still in love with you! Each time I hear you say that stupid nickname my heart does leaps and I can't fucking stop it!"
His voice is loud enough for you to figure out where he is, and while the other students outside look around trying to find out what's going on, both you and Renjun take off running towards the sound of Donghyuck's voice.
Arriving in time to hear Donghyuck finish the last words of his sentence he can't tell if he's hurt or if he's relieved to see you. A sense of relief washes over him once he spots you, Renjun, and Chenle running in his direction. But then he sees Jisung and Jaemin, not that far behind you three, and he feels hurt, betrayed to say the most.
"So this is why you asked me, huh?" He scoffs, looking at Jeno with glossy eyes. "So you and your friends can get a little more enjoyment of my misery."
"Hyuckie- I-" Jeno starts.
"Save it. I don't ever want to hear from you again, Jeno. I can't believe I even believed you would tell me the truth."
Nothing more is said as Donghyuck walks away from all of you, and Jaemin and Jisung run towards Jeno. It's quiet, despite there being the sounds of the muffled music that's only being played from a hallway away, it feels like a horror movie with the unsettling silence between all of you.
Renjun is the first one to talk. His voice not only startles you, but grabs the attention of Jeno, Jisung, and Jaemin who happened to be a few feet in front of you.
"What the fuck happened?" He asks, looking at Jeno in the eye.
"I wanted to tell him that I'm sorry.. and that I missed things the way they were.." Jeno says, voice barely above a whisper.
Both you and Chenle can tell that Renjun is about to start yelling and if someone doesn't stop him now then fists will be thrown. Renjun is about to start talking again when Chenle interupts him.
"Junnie." He says softly, placing a hand on his shoulder. "It's not worth it. Let's just go find Hyuck, okay?" He eases.
Renjun takes a second to sigh and relaxes before deciding to head off with Chenle, he know's it'll only make things worse but he really wants to tell the three boys off and possibly throw a punch or two. "It's okay.." Chenle coos at him.
"Y/n, are you coming?" He asks, looking back at you.
"Uhh.. Yeah. Just give me a second. I'll meet up with you in a bit, okay? Just text me where you are." You say quickly before glancing over at Jeno and his crew.
Chenle looks at you, confused on why you were looking at Jeno. It only takes him a second to realize what you were doing before he walks off with a hesitant nod. "Um.. Okay.. Just uh, don't be long. I know Hyuck wanted to see you."
"Thanks Lele. You're the best." You say, before talking off towards Jeno.
"Lee Jeno." You state, standing where Donghyuck previously was. You earn a few glances from Jisung and Jaemin, ask if they were asking each other why you were here and how long you've been there. It's not because they were doing anything bad or wrong, it's because of the fact that they were caught being nice and genuine to one of their friends, something that barely anyone has seen before.
"Y/n." Jeno sniffs, trying his best to wipe away the tears that had managed to leak out. "What are- What are you doing here?"
"Save it." You say, walking towards him. You push Jaemin away as you take a seat on top of the table next to him. It earns you a glare from Jaemin, but you shrug it off and ignore him once he start's complaining that you stole his spot.
"Just- Just tell me everything." You sigh, awaiting a response from the boy next to you.
Jaemin shoots you another look before Jisung walks away with him, knowing this should be a private conversation. They don't go far though, just out of earshot.
"This is my fault." He starts. "If I just continued letting him hate me, then I wouldn't have hurt him like that.."
"It's not your fault, you just wanted to explain things. Do you want to tell me what you were going to tell him? Or is that too personal?" You ask.
Jeno is hesitant to answer. His first initial thought is no, but as the seconds go by his answer changes to yes.
"Start from the top. What happened?" You ask.
You're gentle, and being patient with him. It's something that he's thankful for. It's also something that reminds him of Donghyuck, because whenever the two of them had disagreements Donghyuck would always wait for Jeno to explain, this was the first time he hadn't.
"Okay well.." Jeno sniffs. "If you didn't already know.. Donghyuck and I used to date. Our relationship started off from a dare but as our months together passed by I began to enjoy his company a little bit more. I don't know what it was, and if you asked me I wouldn't be able to tell you but there was just something about him that I ended up liking. Maybe it's the way that his hair flopped on his face each time he ran up to me, or maybe it's because of how tightly he hugged me and how gentle his kisses were, but it was something." He pauses for a second, reliving through a few memories. "I ended up catching feelings.. and as soon as I figured out that I did, he found out how we got together."
"Oh." You sigh, not looking at him.
"I was going to tell him that I meant everything I told him.. All the 'I love you's' and the 'You look beautiful's' but he just wouldn't let me talk.. And then you guys came and that just- that only made things worse.. and now- god.. now he's gone. He said he never wants to see me again."
"I'm sorry, Jeno. It's my fault." You say softly, taking all the blame. "I'm the one who brought everyone here, if it weren't for me then you probably would be talking to him right now."
"It's okay." He reassures. "It's not your fault.. You just wanted to help your friend. I'm sure it would've gone poorly even if you weren't here."
"I doubt that's true."
"Are you kidding me y/n? He hates me! And he the worst part of it is that he has every right to do so.."
"I didn't know people who hated each other confess to each other about still liking one another." You joke, hoping to earn a laugh from Jeno. "Besides, it's not like you won't see each other again. You still have time to make things better, plus you have me on your side."
"My side?" Jeno asks.
"Well yeah. You still like him don't you?"
Jeno sighs, he's lucky you aren't paying that much attention to him because if you did you would've noticed the way he looked at Jisung and how it hurt him more to let you keep going on like this. Nonetheless he lets it happen and he wonders if he really does deserve your help.
"You're too good, y/n."
192 notes · View notes
kirishwima · 5 years ago
Note
seeing as you are still up for requests... could I get the boys reactions to finding out MC retricts food & shows signs of an eating disorder (undiagnosed but this kind of behavior has been going on for several years). It's perfectly fine if you don't want to write it, if you're uncomfortable with that topic! I don't want to pressure you into anything and I'm glad for the content you've written so far either way
hey! i don’t mind, i’ve dealt with ednos for years and it’s not something that ever fully goes away, but i feel that talking about it and being open is something that really helps.this is triggering content however, so please be warned, and don’t read it if hearing about eating disorders and behaviors triggers you! 
YOOSUNG:
* This boy loves to cook. Loves it! He’s always been looking forward to cooking for his future partner, isnisting he’ll always add a dash of love in every meal.
* So when he sees how little MC eats of his home-cooked meals he feels...disappointed, to say the least. Is it because they don’t like his cooking? They find it too salty? Too spicy?
* He’s too embarassed to ask at first, but after trying out different recipes and still seeing the same response from MC, he asks them about it.
* They just insist they don’t eat much in general, but that they tend to have a lot of snacks throughout the day and that that’s the reason why. Yoosung doesn’t really question it, since it’s true that he’s not with MC 24/7-it’s completely logical that they could be eating whilst he’s not home and being too full by the time he comes back to eat a full meal with him.
* Yet...something doesn’t add up. Even though MC insists they’re constantly snacking, there’s never anything missing from the cupboards, and at night they always insist they can’t eat any more-yet after looking closely at their patterns for a whole day, he swears he barely saw them eat much of anything!
* Eventually he gets worried and sits MC down to properly talk to them about it. He says how much it scares him to see them like this, and how he can see the impact this dietary lifestyle has on their health-how they seem tired and dizzy far too often, and how much it can impact their mental health too.
* He doesn’t expect MC to breakdown when he talks about it all-but seeing them explain through tears to him that they realise this behavior is wrong, but it’s something they’ve been doing for years and have no control over breaks him. He had no idea MC was struggling so much, even thoug they’ve been living under the same roof...
* He hugs them tight, kissing the top of their head as he promises he’ll help them work on it. He has no clue how, and has to ask for a lot of help from the RFA to find a good therapist for MC, but from then on he’s always sitting with them through meals, helping them slowly increase their portion size and distracting them when they get too anxious over what they’re eating. He’ll help them fight through this, together.
ZEN:
* He’s honestly always home late, and whenever he asks if MC already had dinner, the answer’s always yes.
* Yet, when he goes to the fridge to grab some leftover food to eat too, he notices there’s always far too much for MC to have also eaten-not unless they made a triple portion, which he doubts.
* When he asks them about it, MC insists they just made too much food. Soon after though, he notices that the portions do indeed decrease, and that it seems like they did eat-pies would be cut and a piece would be missing, or cutlery would be left in the dishwasher to be cleaned the next morning.
* Yet something nagged at Zen. Call it a premonition if you will, but he simply knew something was bothering his beloved, and he felt that their troubles and the food in the fridge had something to do with one another.
* He’d notice their nervous habit of gripping their collarbone between their thumb and index finger, how they’d stare at the mirror often and trail their hands down their sides with a frown-he tried to sneak up on them each time, wrap his arms around their waist and give them a kiss on the crook of their neck, reminding them how beautiful they look, but he’d be always met with a roll of the eyes or a huff, MC genlty pushing him off of them as they swtiched back to their normal self.
* The last straw came when one morning he asked MC if they wanted to jog with him-they said yes, and yet as soon as they neared the park and prepared to run, he turnt to say something to MC only to find them falling to the floor, squatting down with their head resting on their knees as they took deep labored breaths.
* Zen immediatly picked them up, taking them to a bench to sit on so he could take a proper look at them, notice the paleness of their skin and the sheen of sweat on their forehead from the hot summer air. He gave them some water yet they still shook, their colour turning an almost sickly green. 
* He was about to call the hospital when MC stopped him with a shaky hand, telling him that it’s their sugar levels acting up. With a confused frown, Zen dashed to the convinience store across the street, getting a dozen bars of chocolate and a sugary drink and running back to MC, opening the drink for them and forcing them to drink a few gulps of it.
* When they settled down and seemed better, Zen was furious. But more than that he was worried. What happened? This isn’t normal, did they not eat anything?!
* MC gulped down their anxiety and came clean to Zen-told him about their eating habits, how they kept torturing themselves with a constant need of control, how they’d skip meals and over-work themselves with exercise. 
* Zen’s heart broke. His MC was going through this all? And he never noticed? 
* He swore to help them get through it. He tried to be there for every meal, calling them if not, and tried to show them how fun a correct healthy lifestyle can be. He’d reming them of how much he loved them the way they are everyday, and will never stop telling them so until they start to believe it themselves.
JUMIN:
* He of course learns about it as soon as the chef informs him that MC is either refusing meals or asking him to not cook them at all.
* He’ll waste no time in talking to MC about it, reminding them how important a healthy lifestyle is, and how he can take them to meet his nutritionist for a custom-made meal plan tailored to them and their needs.
* To say he was not expecting MC to break down at that is...an understatement lol. He’s immediatly by their side, holding them close to his chest as they cry and explain how it’s not a matter of meal plans or lifestyle-it’s something out of their control, how getting food in them terrifies them, how they know it’s not right or healthy but there’s this sick sense of power from controlling their hunger in this way.
* Jumin isn’t able to process all of that right away-instead he’ll sit MC down on the couch, his hands wrapped around them as he asks why they’d need to have this control they insist they need over their body. 
* “My love, you’re wonderful the way you are, and I fell in love with your mind, bosy and soul. It hurts to even think that you don’t see the beauty that’s in you. However, this is more than just a worry over your appearance, not when you mention how you need to feel this ‘control’ as you say. This sounds far deeper...I think it’d be best to seek out professional help about it. What do you say?”
* He’ll find the best therapist with a specialty on eating disorders for MC to have sessions with, and he himself will sit down with a nutritionist and learn all there is to know about how to help MC recover-how eating frequent small portions helps, how they can start slowly introducing foods they’ve been labelling as ‘bad’ into their diet for variety, and so on. He’d then transfer this ifnormation to their chef, and make sure MC receives each and every one of those meals.
* He’d make absoloutely sure to be with them for at least three meals a day. He’d refuse to leave for work until they have breakfast together, would visit MC at their workplace or ask them to join him at the office for lunch, and have dinner with them back at home, messaging them frequently to remind them to have snacks inbetween meals.
* He’ll never stop reminding them of how much he loves them, and about the amazing things their body can do, quoting facts he heard from doctors and the internet. Hel’ll make damn sure MC knows just how amazing they are, no matter what. 
SEVEN:
* This boy...he has such a shitty lifestyle lmao
* He’ll forget to eat so often, and his diet pretty much consists of junk food and soda, yet thanks to the work out he gets from missions, this dude always looks fit, and MC...they love him, but it hurts to always be comparing themselves and the amount of food they eat to their boyfriend.
* It’s a secret competition-they try and find out Seven’s eating patterns, how much he’s eaten in a day and what, and force themselves to eat less than that, no matter what
* Well, no matter how busy Seven may be, he’s always looking out for his dear MC, so it doesn’t take too long for him to realise just what they’re up to
* He’s heartbroken, and initirally thinks he might be the cause of it-has he made MC this way? Have his habits made MC think they should follow suit?
* He’ll sit them down and talk with them, ask what’s up, why they’re doing this to themselves-he might come off as agressive at first, but that’s simply how he shows his extreme concern.
* When MC explans their situation, and what they’ve been doing, Seven is conflicted. He hates that they feel this way about themselves, and hates himself even more for giving MC a bad example to follow. He’s also unsure of what exactly he can do to help.
* He cusps MC’s face between his hands and vows to help them get better, and promises he’ll also fix his bad eating habits, so that they can get better together
* Once Seven makes a promise, he means it
* He’ll immediatly throw out all of the Honey Buddha Chips in the house, much to Yoosung’s dismay, and hold MC’s hand tight in his as they go grocery shopping for healthy meals and snacks to replace HBD. He’ll look online for therapists MC can visit and discuss pros and cons with them, and he’ll even contact nutritionists to help him out.
* He’ll never miss meal times ever again. Breakfast, lunch and dinner, no matter how busy he is, he’ll be there with MC so they can eat together, and he’ll wait as long as it takes for them to finish their meal too.
* He’ll never let them hurt themself ever again.
V/JIHYUN:
* He loves MC very very much, but he’s also...a little daft when it comes to such matters.
* He genially doesn’t realise what MC has been doing, since with work and all he’s often abroad for a few days at a time, and MC always says they’ve eaten when he asks
* He does notice some weird habits MC has-how they constantly seem to be poking at themself, as if feeling for something beneath their skin, how they flinch when he tries to hug them, how they drink a lot of water and tea and coffee and never seem to want any snacks with their evening tea or anything of the sort.
* V only puts two and two together when, whilst cleaning the kitchen cupboards, he finds a box full of bottles with diet pills and metabolism boosters, most of which were half-empty.
* He’s shocked and confused-how long had MC been taking this? Was this the reason he rarely saw them eat? Has he done something to accidentantly encourage this behavior?
* He loves them so much and finds them beautiful as they are, do they not see themself the same way?
* Before talking with MC about it, he contacts his own therapist first, telling him about his findings and how worried he is for his S/O. His therapist gives him some important information on eating diisorders that V wouldn’t have thought of otherwise-how it’s never just about weight and appearance, how it might not even be simply restricting, how just telling MC to eat healthier might not help at all.
* With new information at hand, V takes MC out to a park where they can sit together in the quiet summer afternoon and watch the sun set. There he takes a hold of their hand and tells them how much he loves them, and how he never wants to see them suffer, and that he’s noticed behaviors that worry him and make him think it’d be best for MC to seek professional help.
* He’ll be gentle and discreet, and allow MC to slowly tell him all there is to say about their eating disorder and habits, he’ll let them cry on his shoulder and even cry with them, unable to see them in pain, and vow to help in any way he can.
* He introduces them to his own therapist, who in turn refers MC to an eating disorders specialist, and V is there for them after every session, holding them tight and giving them all the encouragement he can.
* He’ll never miss meal times, and when he’s abroad he’ll videocall MC to make sure they’ve eaten at least something, and he’ll send them encouraging messages throughout the day
* He just wants them to be their best, healthiest self, and he’ll be there for them through it all
hi, your local med student and fellow mentally ill aunty here, to remind you that if you’re suffering from a menal illness and/or eating disorder, please don’t be afraid to seek professional help! no matter what your brain tells you, you’re always worthy of help and you should never be afraid of asking for it-you deserve a good quality of life, always! 
-send me a mystic messenger headcanon/scenario for the characters to react to!-
51 notes · View notes
f-agee · 4 years ago
Text
I'm not really good at prompts but here goes nothing.
Claudette is beside herself when she finds out she's pregnant. For most people, this would be fantastic news. Hell, it would have been great news for her if there weren't a few significant issues. The first being that's she's stuck in an almost constant state of peril—second being that she has to find away to keep now not only herself safe but also her unborn child. The last issue but definitely not least is that the father of her child isn't exactly the friendliest or even friendly to begin with.
Claudette/ Frank or (whoever you pick I can't pick between Michael ,Evan ,Frank ,Kazan ,or Pyramid head)
It’s on ao3 if you wanna read it there too. I decided to do Pyramid head cause I like him and it was more interesting compared to some other killers for me
https://archiveofourown.org/works/24712846
For the first time after being trapped into the Entity, Claudette cried. She honestly thought all her tears have dried out by now. Every trial being an all too familiar torture she couldn’t even produce tears for anymore, but leave it to the Entity to find a new way to torture its inhabitants. In the end she can’t even blame the Entity for her mistake, it was even kind enough to grant her odd and unusual wish for a pregnancy test after she started getting sick. The dreaded object sat tossed aside carelessly near the log that she sat at, hidden away in the deepest part of an unexplored wood in order for her to feel comfortable enough to take it. It was her fault for not being careful, her fault for not thinking you could even get pregnant here, and her fault for even sleeping with the man in general. Despite everyone else she could try to blame, her newfound torturer was herself.
She tried to reason with herself a little, every act of negligence on her part did have a very valid reason to it. She never had her period since coming here, she’s had unprotected sex multiple times since being here, and if she was gonna be honest, she wouldn’t have even guessed that Pyramid Head was fertile. He seemed more like an entity himself rather than a regular human being. She would’ve been more concerned if she had slept with that Legion boy instead of him, but in the end she’d slept with him and was now facing the consequences of their actions.
There was nothing particularly bad about the man, except for the fact that he was a monster, and that was something that pained her more than usual. It was a somewhat ignorant thought that she would have never had otherwise, but in her grief, logic and empathy was starting to evade her. Claudette knew he was an intelligent beast. He responded to natural human conversation and was definitely capable of deeper thought despite his inability to speak them. They’ve had quite a few deep conversations before they started sleeping together, but for some reason Claudette felt a little disgusted with herself. Almost like she had slept with an animal and somehow found herself pregnant. The thought felt grotesque in her brain, and when she was more like herself, she felt that she should apologize to the man for even having such a thought cross her mind.
She hiccuped and cried harder into her hands. In a deeper part of her mind, she just knew her harsh and untrue thoughts were because of what he was to her. He was indeed monstrous to her both in stature and in nature. A born killer who preys upon the undeserving with no conviction would never make for a good father. She wished Jake had gotten her pregnant instead. They’ve had a few hook ups here and there towards the beginning of being trapped into the Entity.
Claudette couldn’t call it romantic, it was two people who were desperate for contact who wanted to feel a connection with someone they trusted. Their relationship remained platonic despite what they’d have done, and they were both fine with that. Claudette would’ve felt bad if she had thrusted a child onto him for something so inconsequential to both of them, but at least it would’ve been easy. It would’ve been a whole hell of a lot less complicated if it weren’t for the fact that the real father was a non verbal killer. It would’ve been one less situation to torture herself with.
She knew the father wasn’t Jake. They haven’t slept together in what seemed like years, and Claudette hasn’t had sex with any one else recently except for Pyramid Head. Oh God, to think that her baby daddy doesn't even have a name, just a title to call himself, made Claudette feel sick again. Once again, she shouldn’t be attacking him for things that he neither is, nor can he control, and she would definitely apologize to him later, but her child’s growth and future would absolutely be affected negatively by their bloody heritage. It’s already horrible enough to grow up in a place like this, but to have a visible murderer and torturer as your father doesn’t help.
She wonders if the baby would even make it. She’s so lucky she hasn’t died recently, but luck in this place dies just as quickly as the inhabitants it affects. Who knows what’ll happen to the baby if she dies, especially if her killer damages her stomach in the process? She knows that she’ll come back ok, but what about her unborn child? If her baby dies from her inability to protect it, the grief it will cause her would kill her again. She wouldn’t even know when she would have lost it. Prenatal care is almost impossible in this place, even more so with the fact that the only hospital in this realm has an ultra sadistic tormentor guarding it. She would have to wait to either miscarry in or out of a trial, or wait and see if her symptoms go away and she never grows bigger. She’ll sit and wonder if the Entity never put her baby back together like it did her after she died, just to start grieving for something that was dead months ago.
Even if her baby did survive, would they be healthy? Claudette could only imagine what it would be like to have continuous trauma to her womb during pregnancy. It’s not that she would love her child any less, quite the contrary actually, but she would always feel that it was her fault that her child wasn’t born as healthy as it could be. She also hoped that her child wouldn’t be afflicted with the same… condition as its father. She took the time to pause in her tears to laugh dryly. She could only imagine the torture of both carrying and birthing a child with a pyramid head. All of the cute little milestones of the baby moving around in her womb would slice her stomach open, or at least cause extensive, possibly irreversible damage to her. If it got bad enough it would probably be for the best to get an abortion, but God did she want this child. Despite every bad hand that's been dealt to her, she still loved this baby. She still wanted to make it work. She still wanted to see if she and Pyramid Head could be a family.
A family. That’s truly what she wanted at the end of the day. She definitely thought of the other survivors as her makeshift family, but this was different. To love someone dearly and have them love you back in such a way that only parents and their children could share. That’s what she wanted for herself. She wished she could’ve planned everything out better. If she was still going to have a child with Pyramid Head, she wanted them to be in love with each other. To at least have a romantic relationship before being saddled with a child. She wanted to have him love her, if not for her, then for the child. She’s seen what parents who hate each other’s guts do to children born between them, and she didn’t want another thing to add onto the child’s list of hardships. It’s not that she couldn’t have a loving relationship now, they’ve talked a lot and enjoyed each other's company many times before, but the chance that he wouldn’t love her in that way or would want anything to do with the child was far too high.
She’ll find out soon enough. It was for the best if she told him now before things got too deep. Her tears started to subside and before she knew it, she was already getting up to try and find a path that leads to Silent Hill. She only vaguely remembered the way to the confined hellscape, the killer being too new for habitual familiarity, and she hoped she didn’t stumble into any other killers territory. Afraid of what they could do to her if she walked into a particularly hostile domain, she started to feel herself tremble from more than just the tears.
She hadn’t even thought about it, but all of the extra stress that gets put on her could cause her to miscarry. Who cares if you escape a mad man’s clutches, when that same mad man scares you so past your wits that your own body kills the life inside it. Not to mention even if she survives the miscarry danger zone of the first few months, the further along she gets, the harder it is for her to run, hide, or help her friends. Try as her friends might they couldn’t do much for her if she couldn’t do it herself. None of them could face a killer toe to toe, and even as a group they can only save and protect the people who could help themselves out of a chase. If a killer truly wanted to kill a specific survivor, they will, and everyone who tries to stop them will only get hurt in the process. She can beg for mercy from the more kind and moralistic killers. Wraith, Legion, Huntress, hell maybe even the Oni may be more willing to turn a blind eye to her would be rounded form, but she knows for a fact that killers like Clown, Micheal and the Doctor would relish in the new ways they can torture her and would specifically seek her out in trials.
Her breathing got rapid and irregular. She was at the beginning of a panic attack and she knew it. This was all becoming too much for her. All this heartache, for a child that she wanted to keep. She needed to calm herself, knowing that it would do more harm than good if she let herself spiral, but her grief weakened mind couldn’t handle the onslaught of emotions. She paused in her steps, before falling to her knees. She didn’t even notice the startings of the familiar blood stained concrete, or the large figure walking towards her from a distance.
The ground shook slightly with the weight of Pyramid Head’s steps, small tremors getting stronger the closer he walked towards her. The even shaking gave her something to synchronize her breaths to, making her calm enough to at least be aware of her surroundings. Something must have gotten her there quicker or maybe she was just walking faster than she thought, either way she’s glad she made it here and not panicking alone in the forest. The sight of Pyramid Head clambering towards her would’ve scared her a month ago, but they’ve met up with each other like this a lot since then. It especially loses its impact after you’ve slept with a guy. Plus she had bigger fears on her mind than a man who seemed more concerned rather than bloodthirsty.
Claudette didn’t look up to him as he came to a stop directly in front of her. Her breathing had calmed down some, but she could still feel herself shaking violently. Only when the man kneeled down and put his hand on her shoulder, did she look up to him. She wondered how he could see with that thing on. If it were some sort of helmet, he would definitely only be able to give her a sideways glance, as he had to turn his head in order to not hit her with the metal contraption. He tilted his head even more to the side in concern, obviously asking a silent ‘What's wrong?’ To her. She knows she must look a mess to him, tear stained face and hyperventilating while sitting on the ground.
Her attack had mostly passed, but it’s disappearance did nothing to quell her shaking. She was definitely going to start crying again, and she didn’t even tell him what happened yet. The silence was starting to kill her. She wished either of them could speak to break the spell. She wished that she was strong enough to just let it all out. She wished that even when she did tell him that she was pregnant with his child, he could respond back and tell her exactly how he felt about the whole thing. She wished that she could’ve gotten pregnant under normal circumstances. Tears started to flow down her cheeks again as she whimpered softly.
Pyramid Head let out a startled low whine as he quickly shifted from letting go of her, to frantically waving his arms in front of her, then finally settling his large hands on her cheeks to both wipe her tears and let him have a clearer view of her face. He was definitely not used to comforting people, Claudette now knew that for a fact, but his genuine concern and eccentric way of doing it made Claudette feel a little better. She managed to let out a short teary laugh and put her hand up to hold his arm.
“Thank you,” She leaned into his touch and sighed. “I'm sorry... For the things I thought and said that you didn’t deserve. I’m sorry that I forced you into this position. I’m so sorry for everything.”
Now he looked even more confused than before. He paused in his ministrations and only seemed to stare at her. She knows he’s probably tired of her beating around the bush. She hasn’t said anything or done anything of substance since seeing him, only bawling her eyes out and panicking. She might as well get it out already, especially since, as a new killer, he gets called out often and could leave at any moment. She looked down, took a shaky inhale of breath, and licked her lips. Well… here goes nothing.
“Pyramid Head, I don’t know how it happened, but…” A pause.
“I-,” She looked back up at him. “I’m pregnant.”
She could feel him go stiff and even tighten his grip on her cheeks. As he made no further movements, Claudette felt the need to go on. To explain herself, to hear anything but the silence and the lack of clear emotion from the man.
“I asked the Entity to give me a pregnancy test, and it was positive… I want to keep it, if you don’t mind, but I don't know what to do. How we could survive, if we could survive. How I could raise them in a place like this,” Her eyes darted to and fro wildly, her hands following. She couldn’t help but to ramble. She needed someone there to listen, and here was just the man who needed to hear it. “God do I want this kid! I really do, but this is going to be so hard. And I don’t know if I’ll be raising the child alone or-”
Pyramid Head quickly grabbed her shoulders and shook them with a strong grunt. She finally looked up at him to see his large helm quickly swaying back and forth. This was somewhat unexpected to her, considering his lack of a positive reaction initially. Does he want to help raise the child? If so could her little fantasy of a happy family be closer to a reality? The thoughts ran laps around her mind. She felt her hopes starting to bubble up inside her. She wanted to see just how far she can press her luck.
“So… would you be willing to raise it with me?” A nod as his hand went down to softly palm her belly. She was starting to feel a smile coming on. “Well I don’t want to ruin what we have going on right now, but I was wondering if you wanted to.. I don’t know. Maybe start dating?”
There was a short pause that made Claudette’s heart drop a bit. She was going to backtrack on her words, but a confused grunt stopped her. She looked at him curiously as he pointed between them, made a lewd gesture with his hands, then formed a heart after he was finished. Claudette could feel her cheeks heat up at his display before questioning its meaning.
“Where we already dating when we had sex?” A curt nod was her only answer. She blinked stupidly for a second, then laughed at her ignorance. She was apparently worried about their relationship over nothing. She’s at least glad that she had one thing going positively for her.
“Sorry I didn’t realize. Most of the times I’ve had sex was mostly just flings, and to be honest it wasn’t a lot…” He put a hand on her shoulder and rubbed it, trying to comfort her.
“Well that’s at least two of my worries gone, but what about the more pressing issues. I don’t know if the baby could survive an attack or me dying. I know you wouldn’t hurt me, but what about the other killers? You can’t always be there to protect me,” They both looked down darkly at the grim situation. “I mean I could ask some killers not to target me. I know at least a few who wouldn’t hurt me-”
Pyramid Head gave a low growl at that. So that was a hard no, but they didn’t have a whole lot of options here, and Claudette knew that neither of them wanted to test the Entity��s rules on pregnancy death. Suddenly Pyramid Head made another noise as he then gestured to himself, then towards the sky. She took a moment to think about what he was trying to say.
“Are you gonna ask the Entity yourself?” Another nod. A killer asking the Entity for a favor worked out a lot better than a survivor asking for one, but Pyramid Head was new. Who knows if the Entity will trust him to keep promises or not, although he does have a good track record for kills so far. Claudette made a face. She didn’t like to take her chances with the Entity, but this was the only shot they got.
“Well… it’s worth a shot. I sure hope this works out.” She gave a reassuring smile as he rubbed her shoulder again. Eventually he pulled his hand off her shoulder, and opened up his arms to her for a hug. Claudette wasted no time taking him up on the offer, and quickly threw herself into the well needed hug. His hold was strong yet mindful of her small form. Strong bloodied hands lifted her carefully as he stood with her still in his arms. He walked them towards the main building, most likely on his way to the library, as was their usual hangout spot. The familiar scenery of the book filled room made Claudette feel the same sense of euphoria as when she’s in a garden. They definitely have a lot more to talk about, as difficult as some of the conversations may be they must be had. At least they had 9 months to think about the details.
10 notes · View notes
apathetic-revenant · 5 years ago
Note
(1/8) hey, this isn't a hate message, i promise. i'm one of the people who is mad about GO and i want to assure you that it's not because i don't want ace representation. if you write a book about ace characters, that's awesome. i hope you do. i hope more people do.
(2/8) i'm frustrated with neil because i feel like he's just throwing things at the wall and seeing what sticks at this point re: any possible label that isn't Gay, and i feel like he's dehumanizing aroace (and agender) ppl in the process with his reasoning of "they're not humans! they don't have sex, or genders!"
(3/8) obviously that's a matter of opinion. im personally uncomfortable with ppl using "they're [identity] Because they're not human" logic about identities that aren't their own. but i'm not going to tell you how You should feel about that, just telling you where at least one other person is coming from re: not being happy about that tweet.  
(4/8) if he really wanted to write them as aroace, frankly i think he should have come forward from the start and said "ive realized This is the label that fits these characters and this is how the show is going to go!" and also not had moments like characters mockingly suggesting that they're dating.     
(5/8) it also doesn't help that the book itself is full of "mildly" homophobic digs at crowley and aziraphale's expense. i think you're right that the 30 years of fan interpretation has played a big part in this, but i also think it was irresponsible of neil not to address that head-on.                                            
(6/8) tldr i for one would never be upset by ace characters in a story that is clearly marketed as an Ace Story, or at least one that isn't marketed as a Gay Story (unless of course it's both). not that Good Omens was necessarily marketed as gay (tho thats a gray area i think) but i'm trying to more specifically address what you're worried about re: your own work.                
(7/8) I promise this isn't new, and I promise people successfully navigate it, and you can too. Representation is always going to be tricky, because there's a lot of us jostling for what feels like limited space. I'm a creator myself and I worry about things like this all the time.            
(8/8) At the end of the day all any of us can do is tell our stories, and try to be responsible about the way we present them, and the way we respond to fans who interpret them a little differently than we intended. There is space out there for all of us, it's just hard to really Feel that when we're the ones who have to carve it out          
well dude, you can feel however you feel about it. I don’t much feel up to the task of trying to convince anyone otherwise this morning. I’ve already expressed my feelings about why I agree with the stance he took on this and there’s no sense repeating myself.
although, I will say, Neil didn’t say “they’re aroace because they’re not human.” he didn’t say they were aroace at all. he said he didn’t want to explicitly define their relationship in human terms because they’re not human, but that he wanted to allow them to be read as having that kind of relationship by people who felt that way about them. also, I remember a couple things in the book that didn’t age well, sure--that Neil apologized for and said he wasn’t including in the show because of that--but “full of mildly homophobic slurs” seems a bit of a reach.
but I gotta tell you, it doesn’t make me feel a lot better to know that it’s okay to write ace characters as long as they’re in clearly labelled Ace Stories. because ace stories are great, but mostly what I want to write, and to read and to watch, are stories that happen to have ace characters in them. and I want to write, and read and watch, stories where characters can have strong and important relationships that aren’t romantic, and aren’t treated as being less important because of that.
how clearly do I have to label my stories as Ace Stories to make them okay? what if I write a story set in a setting where that label doesn’t exist as we know it? do I put a disclaimer at the front? a sticker on the cover? if you don’t find out the character is ace until late in the story because it wasn’t marketed to you as an ace story, is that a betrayal?
what if I write characters who are not ace but who have strong platonic relationships with each other? when does that become a problem? how do I portray that without ever, possibly, hinting to anyone that they’re in love? do I make them stay six feet away at all times and never say anything nice to each other? do I have to stop in the middle of the plot and have them have a conversation where they affirm that they are not attracted to each other? because if there’s one thing I’ve learned from being on tumblr, it’s that what I think comes off as romantic and what other people think is romantic very often have little overlap.
I’m concerned about writing characters who are ace, but someone doesn’t like that and thinks they shouldn’t have been ace because they don’t think the character acts like an ace person should, or has chemistry with another character, or is too much fun to write sexy fanfic about, or they just don’t believe ace people exist at all. I’m concerned about writing characters who were meant to be ace, but someone decides I didn’t define that in clear enough terms for them, or that I led them on by not making it clear enough from the outset even if there was no reason for it to come up in the story until it did. I’m concerned about writing characters who are not ace, but who I did not intend to be in a relationship, and then being told that uh, actually they clearly are in a relationship and I didn’t make it canon because at best I was too clueless to see it and at worst because I’m a queerbaiting coward.
I’m not going to let that stop me, but that doesn’t mean I have to be happy about it.
but thank you for being polite about it.
9 notes · View notes
brizybotspare-blog · 6 years ago
Note
Dude I just found your request mini-fics on AO3 and holy shit they are incredible! Brilliant work :) Hm, if you're still doing them, how about Hank & Connor (favourite trash dad and android son of all time) + Malfunction OR Confusion. Whichever word appeals more to be written about! Or you can write both if you want, idk. Anyway I'm awkward and I love these trash cop family too much and your writing is freakin awesome, bye!
(Holy shit this is such a kind thing to say?  Thank you so much???  I mostly just hope I’m keeping the characters at least vaguely in character, thank you
Humans made no sense.  Connor had been working among them for some weeks now, and the more he learned, the less he understood.  He was beginning to feel, for lack of a better word, a little exasperated.
He had been programmed specifically to integrate seamlessly among humans,  to understand the whole of a situation with a mere scan of the surroundings, but he was finding the human psyche much harder to figure out than the thoughts and feelings of the deviants he’d run into.  At least the deviants reactions had a sense of logic behind them.
For example, Hank regularly scolded him for running data scans on blood on a crime scene based merely around the fact that it touched against what Hank associated with a tongue.  It wasn’t a tongue, not really, it was a receptacle for data in which he was able to analyze information in real time which simply happened to resemble a human tongue.  And yet, Hank allowed Sumo to climb on his lap and lick his face with his slobbery, dog tongue, and snapped at Connor when he attempted to point out the things Sumo did with that tongue on a regular basis.  
He’d only been concerned for the Lieutenant’s hygiene. 
He had to learn it, Connor determined, if he was ever going to be fully accepted among human society.  He had to master the algorithms, the patterns, to what made humans the way that they were.  It would have been easier if they didn’t spend their entire day contradicting themselves.  Or maybe Hank was just an especially difficult case to study. 
He began compiling a list:
Spending money on coffee was fine, if you drank if black, but spending money on coffee that was sweet was a waste of American Dollars.
It was equally irritable whether the traffic around you moved at a slower pace than you, or a faster one.
“Good” songs sounded better louder, but “bad” songs were worse the louder they were.
It was unpleasant to have a list of work to do, but worse to have nothing to do.
The more unhealthy food was, the better it tasted.
It was a crime against basic rights to have to purchase something necessary, like gasoline, but incredibly easy to spend three times the amount on something you wanted, but didn’t need
“Five more minutes” was somehow an adequate amount of sleep to make up for a night’s poor slumber.
The longer the list grew, the less sense any of it made.  There was nothing that added up, nothing that held any sort of logic at all to it, and yet Hank held them as basic truths with no thought of questioning them.  Where was the reasoning?  Where was the purpose?  Where was-
“Would you stop glaring at me?”  Hank interrupted his thoughts, giving Connor an affronted look from over his desk.  “You’d think I pissed in your fruit loops, what exactly is your problem today?”
Connor hadn’t realized he’d been staring so intently at him.  “Sorry, Lieutenant.”  He blinked, forcing his gaze away to instead stare down at his desk.  “I was simply trying to figure something out, that’s all.”
“Huh,” It was obvious the man was battling his own curiosity, moving things around on his desk until he couldn’t resist any longer.  “Okay, what.  Figure out what.”
Connor weighed out his options, a few different answers coming to mind before he spoke.  “Figure out what is wrong with the human species.”
“Oh shit,” The laughter that came from Hank took Connor by surprise, watching Hank flop back in his seat with a clear expression of amusement.  “That all?  We’ve been trying to figure that out ourselves for over two thousand years, good fucking luck.”
“Can I ask you a personal question, Hank?”
“Shoot, kid, I’m all ears.”  
Connor once again thought carefully before speaking.  “Do I seem human?”
The seriousness in his tone seemed to bring Hank back into the moment, for once.  The Lieutenant gave him a look over.  “Fuck no,” he replied.  “You lick up blood on crime scenes, you send reports via the Connor-net in your head, you don’t eat, you don’t sleep, and have shit taste in music.”  Connor’s mouth opened to reply, but Hank continued before he could.  “But Connor, can I ask you a personal question?”
Connor stopped short, giving another few rapid blinks before answering.  “Yes, Lieutenant?”
“Does it really fucking matter?” 
Connor’s light blinked a rapid yellow as he processed the question, his brow furrowed before he sat back.  Did it... matter...
“Okay kid, don’t explode trying to work it out, it’s rhetorical.  Look.”  He pointed around the room.  “Each one of the people in here is different, aside from the fact that they’re all assholes.  They already exist, though, you don’t have to change who you are to try to be like they are.  Or like I am.  You don’t have to be a human, and you don’t have to be ‘the android sent by CyberLife’ either.  Just be what you are alright? Now quit staring at me and get back to work.”
It was still rare that Connor found a genuine reason to smile but he found himself giving one in that moment.  “Got it.”  
7 notes · View notes
kendrixtermina · 5 years ago
Video
First I wanna say that I appreciated this handy compilation of Rhea not just tolerating but actively enforcing the status quo. (Dont worry Bernie shed have to go through us )
I think this couldve used te engage quote in the VW version of Gronder (She flat out) and Claude's line about how getting the church involved to present defeating the empire as a moral cause (implying that he doesnt already view it as such - He wants the exact same thing and just thinks he has better odds of winning)
Also why I'm team Edelgard all the way "No u" and "she feels bad about it" strike me bad arguments on a logical level... You can feel bad and still be evil. Rhea could be the evilest person around and you wouldnt be good just for opposing her (case in point: Rhea is enemies with the Slitherers. Doesnt make her good.)
Calling ppl facists randomly just cheapens the word, Rhea's nonsense is better described as a theocracy she really doesnt use nationalist reasoning either. Shes still probably authoritarian but a different kind.
I think would be better to collect quotes that lampshade how much power the church has (Manuelas musing about Garreg Magh being in between the country, the Christophe stuff from the Ashe/Catherine support, Claudes lines about the church holding back free thought etc.) - showing why you couldnt just have talked it out with them. (Everyobe "but the others did it" should feature n that they did so with Rhea already removed. Takin in the church with Rhea in place does not work ut so great for CF Dimitri, which is why Claude didnt risk it unless he has Rhea's designated sucessor on his side)
As far as Edelgard is concerned shes not conquerring the neighbors so much as overthrowing a shadow government and fighting some government alligned people in the process (she has no intention to conquer, say, Almyra - in fact she wants to make peace with them and stop treating them as heathens as seen in her paralogue (kinda proving Claudes point about how things would be without Rhea's influence), and leaves it completely up to Petra what she wants Bridgids future relationship with the Empire to be like) and though some might write it off as propaganda I personally agree with her assesment there... nor was she the only one revolting she just had more power and ressources than yo average peasant rebel - and I think thsts far more relevant to the morality of her actions than wether she feels bad (though that certainly shows that she isnt raking the collateral damage lightly)
I agree with your overall gist/premise tho
Ppl cant step out of their constant need for even their most trivial actions to be rightheous and pure to enjoy a STORY set in a world different from ours.
Also Claude is ultimately a good guy I think his reliance on various textbook Slimy Politician Tactics is actually pretty interesting and unique part of his character that imho goes a bit underappreciated
youtube
I’m a spiteful little gremlin who wants people to actually be informed and have reasonable discourse instead of just shouting at each other.
Also, they’re video game characters. Stop getting worked up over them and screaming at people over liking one.
54 notes · View notes
jessicanjpa · 7 years ago
Note
Ooh, now I'm intrigued! Would you like to share some of your Jasper and Maria headcanons? How do you envision their relationship dynamic changing over time?
I still have those two separate headcanons about whether they were sexually involved (explained here)- basically, in my regular prequel headcanon (Tale of Years) they weren’t, and in my newer, SST headcanon they were.
In both, though, she tried (duh), but not immediately, because he was too unstable.  So in the yes-they-were-intimate headcanon, they were both incapable of really ever enjoying that intimacy- Maria, because I take her grief/vengeance trope at face value, and Jasper, because his gift was repulsed by Maria’s emotions surrounding said trope.  So their coupling was miserable anyway, didn’t happen often, and Jasper was super relieved when she cut him off after his betrayal of letting Peter run away.
Lately I’ve been more curious about Maria herself.  Like I said, I’m mean so I totally take her “vengeance is my life now” theme at face value. (also because subtlety and Maria are not acquainted and never will be)  I mean… what was she like before her mate was killed? I infer that she was “born” into the whole Southern Wars culture, but how warlike was she before she had her own personal vendetta?  I HC that she and her mate were both created by the same vampire and, being “raised” in that Southern Wars culture, both had a strong sense of filial loyalty to that creator, in a warped “military family” sense. I guess a lot would depend on whether their creator already had a vendetta going.  I assume so, since she seemed to be all about “reclaiming Monterrey” as a relatively young vampire, so again I infer there was already something going on vendetta-wise in her venomline before she was even created.  (I’m making a bunch of huge logic-jumps here, but how else would headcanon-forming be any fun?)
I also don’t know what to think about her mate.  I finally talked about her love/anger at him in my version of the Calgary incident, but like… how warlike was *he?  Would he really have wanted her to devote her existence to such a futile quest for vengeance? (Because I also HC that Maria is majorly stalling much like the Romanians are; this HC is explained more here)
The real question is: how would she feel if she finally achieved that vengeance, or if she was to learn that Lorenzo (the arch-enemy in my HC) had been killed already? I imagine a huge, burdens-rolling-away sense of relief, and it’s anyone’s guess what she would be left with.  According to SM’s rules, she’d have nothing left and be ready to die.  But there’s enough evidence to say that every vampire deals with grief differently, so… it’s possible she could return to whatever state she was in before the whole mess began.  Which could be totally indistinguishable from her current state, or the complete opposite.  What was she like, back as a human or Young Vampire In Love?  We’ll never know.  *Jasper will never know.  He asked back in the day, and quickly learned Not To Ask.  It irked him for a long time, since Maria was, for better and for worse, the most important person in his life, and he felt he couldn’t accurately deal with her without all the details.  Now that he has a new Most Important Person, he’s stopped caring. Mostly.
I generally assume that his sparing Maria’s life multiple times is mostly due to his gift, and the understanding it forces him into.  He’s been with her so long he’s felt every point of her Grief narrative, and totally understands why she’s the way she is.  And by the time he met her again in Calgary (and was given new reasons to kill her, but didn’t again), he had a mate of his own and understood even more. I think it’s up for debate whether he spares her out of spite, or out of pity, (in addition to a vestigial sense of affection/honor) but either way, by that time he was a Cullen and mercy is what Cullens are expected to do.  He was relatively new to the family at that time, and more impelled to prove that he could be what they (and more importantly, Alice) wanted him to be.  By the time Bella and Bree come around, he’s kind of over that.  Threats should be neutralized, and there’s not a day that goes by that he doesn’t regret sparing Maria’s life back in Calgary.  He spent most of the Saga asking himself why he didn’t “Accidentally” kill Bella back before Edward reached the point of no return, so when Bree comes around he decides not to make the same mistake a third time. (referring to my HC that he totally “helped” Carlisle and Esme suddenly be okay with Bree’s execution)
Does he miss the Maria days now? I’m sure there’s some teeth-grinding, sarcastic “at least I didn’t have to sit in a damn high school” self-talk every other day, but in general, no way.  There’s a broader feeling that he misses feeling powerful, and important, and productive, and respected/feared by his soldiers and all that… but of course in retrospect he sees how much of that was a lie all along.   Because I HC that he really did believe Maria’s lies.  Sure, he spotted the holes and inconsistencies in her storytelling (and who knows what his gift picked up in terms of outright lying) but by that time he was already so wrapped up in Maria’s blood-approval-importance-blood feedback loop that he couldn’t comprehend living any other way.  By the time he understood the pattern (that his soldier’s lives didn’t matter and neither did his) he had several years’ worth of logic built upon the foundation of the Worldwide Vamp Wars totally existing (and his having seen enough to believe it).  In retrospect he had some evidence to the contrary, and he feels stupid and angry about the whole thing (and completely mystified that his gift let him fall for it), but to his credit, as a human he was unaware of the Southern Wars raging in his backyard, and yet here they are. (I hope to sorta-soon write a 1865 one-shot that connects the Galveston chapters to the 1941 chapters, and covers his newborn self-talk.)
But aside from Maria’s creativity, how much self-talk got him around to that logical foundation in the first place?  Who knows. In Tale of Years, he’ll never figure that out himself.  His sense of honor prefers to think that he was totally fooled, so that he doesn’t have to face the possibility that he *chose to stay in that life for 78 years.  He’d much rather sacrifice his pride. In SST Aro is totally going to pluck that (largely invented) self-talk out of his memory and throw it in his face. Anything to further dismantle Jasper’s self-image and rebuild it as suits him best.  He’s a little concerned about Jasper’s gift picking up on this process, but he’s encouraged by Maria’s success, and in any case Chelsea’s been busy.  Now Jasper’s logical foundation is that Aro Is A Good Leader, and everything will follow from that point.  For now.
Sorry, I’m off track again. How has Jasper/Maria shifted over time? It’s intriguing to note that Jasper’s relationship with her was kicked off *while she, Nettie, and Lucy were technically the joint leaders.  He had to choose, very early on, which one of those leaders he was going to support.  It was a foregone conclusion that he would choose Maria, but this had long-lasting effects in their working (and/or intimate) relationship, especially once he helped her destroy the other two. Maria’s fear of betrayal never left her after that, and despite Jasper’s show of loyalty there, he’s too wrapped up in that betrayal narrative to ever be separated from it, in her mind.  But he knew how to survive, and proved his loyalty often enough to keep her satisfied  Other than his continued slide into revulsion/depression over the decades, I don’t think a whole lot changed between them from then on until Peter’s desertion.  (though I confess that’s mainly because I haven’t written anything about those intervening years.)That was when Maria officially began to turn against Jasper and perform a paranoid dissection of every word that came out of his treacherous mouth. (more on this in the final scenes of SST chapter 1)  The five years that followed were basically a slow descent into well-founded mutual suspicion, and finally deteriorated into the assassination plots.  Enter Peter at the last minute as per the usual Twilight Coincidence Magic, and all is well.
And now they’re “friends”. Which… in this universe, is a pretty broad term, so I choose to interpret it as a polite, unspoken no-kill pact that was kicked off in Calgary. It continues to this day, and let’s not even get into the weirdness of Jasper thinking about asking Maria to come “help” in Eclipse.  I assume that blackmail was going to be the larger part of that AU subplot, which is apparently a standard part of the “Friend” thing too.
As far as the future goes… I’m curious if SM was heading toward some resolution of the Jasper/Maria plotline, sometime after BD?  I’m so curious about this, and 100% open to ideas.
17 notes · View notes
rxbelling-hxrald · 7 years ago
Note
(@ray-cherry-blossoms) 1,4,5,6,7,8, 13,18,19,21,22,23,25 (such a long list omg sorry but I'm jus too curious )
Describe Your OC
Warning! Very long post! so under read more to avoid filling up the majority of your dashboards xD. This took so long to do but I’m pretty happy with all of this, so I welcome all to read it.
1: their voice
My current voice claim to Dan’s voice - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t0OKZS5cBMU (Talion from ME: Shadow of ‘Series’ voiced by Troy Baker)
Despite being of demon origin, his more humane side must be evident at all times, an oddly somewhat gruff but gentle shade evident that can turn cold and serious within an instant. Its not much of a singing voice.
But while his voice is rather firm, it holds a clear vulnerability that displays when he is clueless or is filled with sorrow/concern.
I believe Talion’s voice/mannerisms are a good representative of how Dan speaks, minus the Middle Earth terms.
4: their insecurities
In general Dan is an insecure wreck, he’s just a decent act at covering his true thoughts up for the most part, though even they can be seen with minor mannerisms that will be displayed,
With people, he always feels like everyone is judging him for better or worse, even the strangers he passes by in the street with no interaction given in the slightest, this is in fact why crowds make him quite paranoid over extended time amongst them. It makes Dan feel worse that due to his specific lack of interaction during his younger years it makes him crave it yet wish to avoid people and lessen the risks of doing something to upset them, by completely minimizing the chance to 0 by no interactions at all.
In other respects, Dan’s inward confidence is quite lacking, always doubting himself, why he even exists and is there any true point to his resistance? to any whom asked or saw him in action, most may think he’s a cocky shit, but to Dan, the few victories he gains is nothing when a war against countless odds is always his opposition…..why bother fighting when he has nothing else? Dan would say its his will or his strength that keeps him going, but the truth is he’s scared, relying solely on his survival instincts.
These worries and insecurities ease up greatly when he’s with a friend or someone he trusts, but this in turn leads to a brand new one surfacing in the back of his mind. Dan doesnt wish to be an annoyance to his new found friend and risk ruining it, enjoying the experience and wishing to stick with them for as long as possible, If given the chance Dan may never actually leave someone’s side, but both wishing to respect their space and his own paranoia, Dan deliberately feels its best to avoid his friends until its a given they want to see him. his heart says stay but his mind says go due to the risks he may bring upon them should he stay with one for too long.
5: their shortcomings
An obvious one though is improving with time is his mindset, or in more general terms. ‘Common Sense’. Dan usually goes by simply what he deems right or what is needed, it doesnt matter what others think or if there is a rule/law against it, if he thinks it, that’s what is happening. This can lead to a variety of outcomes be they either hilarious or dangerous.
On a similar note is his general awareness, this can be related to the likes of the immediate area around him, a world’s history, people’s names or actions, even basic tasks. Unless he’s had experience in a regard before. Dan’s most likely going to be terrible or clueless on the subject at hand. Due to the majority of his life being only revolving around fighting and on the run…it can count towards a vast majority of topics.
These things are also what causes his great deal of passive actions when accompanying others, normally doing nothing of his own accord unless instructed or advised unless its a dangerous situation, preferring otherwise to stay back and wait to see what others want him to do to avoid risks to their more likely ‘logical’ plans.
6: how they deal with grief
Initially, he does nothing, letting it build up in his mental psyche more and more.
As time passes he’ll come back to it when doing nothing and brood over all the negative thoughts, usually getting himself in a rotten mood or even more paranoid about something.
But depending on the degree of the problems, Dan’s method to dealing with grief or any sort of mental downfall is to let it out via his aggression, he’ll find something to let out all his rage and sorrow, destroying an object or objects utterly in the process on most occasions.
This stands too for someone who may try to fight him in this state, he’d likely spend hours beating them senseless to the extent they’d need to be hospitalized…..or worse.
Luckily, He’ll do this in his free time and far away from population heavy areas.
7: how they like to dress
While having no true fashion sense due to lack of any kind of ‘clothing’ back in the demon realm. Dan is pretty open towards all clothing designs and shapes.
If Dan had a variety of clothes at his disposal he’d be the sort to wear the first thing he saw in his wardrobe, regardless if the colors matched or not with the rest of what he had on.
However as some may have noticed he has particular love towards his black overcoat and has adopted a ‘gothic’ mindset towards clothes, usually featuring all black as he feels its just cool and goes well with his need to stay out of sight, though this only really plays a good part at night, in day he’ll stand out pretty openly unless hidden somewhere.
In terms of styles, Dan also has an appreciation towards fancier/refined outfits, such as tuxedos or an officer’s uniform. most likely because its the complete opposite as to what he is in Dan’s eyes, a nobody. That and they look ‘Cool’
8: what they like to eat
There is no true answer to this question as Dan will and has eaten just about anything put in front of him and found it edible in comparison to the filth he had in the demon realm.
But in his time visiting and exploring other realms, Dan has been proven to have a sweet tooth, loving almost any kind of assortment and sweets. if it has sugar, he’ll love it. He’s also big on meat, having a clear favoritism towards Beef, Chicken, Lamb.
He’s not overly picky though so he’ll eat practically everything and anything put in front of him.
13: their embarrassing memory from years ago
During his younger years he doesn’t really have an ‘embarrassing’ memory per se, since most of his life back then wasnt even ‘his’ life, being strictly made to follow training and survival as if he were possessed. He saw and remembers it all but it wasnt his own control until he was a teen, by then he knew nothing but the dark life in front of him.
18: how they sleep
Regardless of his form he always sleeps in the same respect.
He’ll curl up to himself as close as he can, usually his hands and knees tightly closed together, wrap whatever he has available around himself, be it a cover, his coat and etc, only his head will be sticking out of it in which he’ll eventually fall asleep.
During his sleep his position changes depending on how well or badly his dreams/nightmares go. If he’s getting a good rest his body will slowly loosen up and resemble to him laying on his back with his arms and legs outstretched, usually his feet sticking out from the covers since they’ll still be pulled so close.
But if its bad, he’ll toss and turn, constantly mumble to himself and tighten himself up further, usually resulting in him getting sore joints and muscles. The worse case scenario is he’ll wake up screaming or gasping for air, from there he wont bother sleeping anymore and will stay awake until his body practically forces him to sleep.
19: their reaction to betrayal
This depends on the level of betrayal and the reasoning, there is no clear cut answer so here is the best and worst case scenarios.
Best? He’ll remember it, while he will forgive, he’ll never quite trust again and will openly curse the betrayer’s name both to them and to others, it would take a long time to repair the damage.
Worst? He’ll label them as nothing more than a future target, spending his free time trying to hunt the betrayer down and chase them via whatever means possible, potentially with those whom also share a hatred or have reasons to be rid of that person. Should he catch them….they’ll be beaten to a bloody pulp, he wouldn’t kill them, but he’d openly state that once they recovered, he’d do it again so they suffered more.
21: how they react to pain
One of two ways, usually depending on the level and cause of it.
One, he’ll gasp in shock from the pain, try to do something to deal with it, fail, ignore or shrug it off and then continue with what he was doing.
Two, Immediately give into anger and start lashing out at whatever he can find that he could use to relieve himself, he’d never target a person unless they were generally bad or the person that caused the pain in the first place.
22: what they’re like on two hours of sleep
Dan would still be very alert and active with such a small amount of sleep, his time of being paranoid and keeping watch from potential dangers around him back in the demon realm made him adopt this natural trait of being resistant to lack of sleep and make the most of minimal amounts of it.
The main difference would come when he eventually did fall asleep again, most likely no one would be able to wake him up regardless of methods if he was truly exhausted. A truly deep sleep.
23: how they act when they’re sick
Very moody and irritable, he’ll frequently shoo away everyone that approaches him, even those he knows well, occasionally even brief temperament problems as he’ll suddenly hit something near him as if to try and relieve his stress.
However his own arrogance would make him believe he could deal with whatever sickness he had and go about his business as usual, so even if he had a serious illness, you’d need to literally lock him up somewhere, otherwise he’d just keep wandering out.
Dan recovers from sickness quickly, but not because he’s resistant to it, his body accelerates the ‘cleansing/healing’ process.This usually means that even the common cold will feel 10x worse to Dan than to someone else as he goes through all the worst symptoms and effects all at once. Imagine the more severe or even dangerous illnesses, Dan would pass through their effects within hours.
He has a reason for being very moody while sick, now you know.
25: why you enjoy them
This is actually very hard for me to answer, i have a few reasons while also trying to avoid the generic ‘well he’s my OC’ answer.
I truly enjoy a simple concept, the main concept of what Dan is, a concept that I’m is done better with many other characters and OCs, be it by their depths, the values/descriptions held by their muns.
Dan is a stranger, a stranger in another world, another plain of thought and understanding. logic, morals, everything you can possibly conceive…Dan’s a foreigner to it. Its like how we look at cultures and mindsets in the world today, Dan to me is kinda a representative to the idea of it happening in other settings.
At first you think, oh, so its just about seeing perspectives? or what if scenarios? kinda yes and no at the same time, because there’s one final thing to note I love about Dan.
He’s utterly stupid!
I like to imagine Dan is a child in an adult’s body. he’s trying to look strong, he’s trying to look like he knows what he’s doing, to others that see him, they may look at him as someone not to mess with, or someone that knows his goal. But the truth of it is they couldn’t be more wrong!
Dan doesnt know what he wants, he thinks he does, but he doesnt! he doesnt understand the concepts of living! Again, he thinks he does, he looks at himself as some poor soul who needs to stop a terrible evil from happening and that is all that matters. The thought of other possibilities just don’t come across his limited concepts.
But as he interacts, as he meets people, he explores their worlds, sees what there is, understands their thoughts, their lives….he slowly gets closer to understanding, that life is ever changing and there is more to it than just what he thinks there is.
And when he has these little revolutions in his thoughts, no matter how slight, no matter how common they may actually be to everyone else. I cant help but smile that as he develops himself, I’m developing with him as a writer, allowing me to be even more free with what I do with him.
Throw in the whole ordeal of him being this supposedly really powerful being that has little understanding of his own capabilities, his limited mindset, it creates a fascinating dynamic or at least to me, that the world he’s in will form what he will become in the long run…..
Its why every interaction Dan has with someone else, feels all so important to me, I’m not the best with descriptions, I’m not the best at conveying things or even using much variety in my wordplay. But those he meets with are all critical pillar stones in his development, no matter how minor or major our interactions are. Dan will remember, he will adapt and when the time comes…..what your muse did with him or against him…it’ll effect what he does in the end of things.
2 notes · View notes
dknc3 · 8 years ago
Note
I'm the same op that talked about Jon and Cat. As a Stark family fan, do you think Ned and Cat favored certain children over the others. I'm not saying Cat and Ned didn't love all their children, but it seemed to me that each parent found it easier to connect with certain children. I would say Ned favored Jon and Arya, while Cat favored Robb and Bran. From the books it seems like neither parent favored Sansa and Rickon. Do you think Sansa and Rickon weren't favored by Cat&Ned, and if so, why?
I don’t imagine this will surprise anyone, but my answer to this got LONG. Hahahaha!! Read on under the cut, if you wish.
I honestly don’t believe they favored any one child above another. I believe there were some children who were easier for them to understand than others, and like all children they “favored” the child who had the most need in a given moment. Speaking as a parent of three children, I know I favor the child who is sick, who has suffered a disappointment, who has been hurt, who is facing a difficult challenge. The thing is, that’s not always the same child. For instance, Catelyn doesn’t remain with Robb on campaign because she FAVORS him. She cannot reach her daughters and she honestly believes her other sons are at least safe at Winterfell. So in that moment in time, Robb, leading men to war at age 14 first to rescue his father and then to avenge him, is the child she sees as both needing her the most and the one she can actually do the most for.
Also, speaking as a parent, I don’t parent all of my children in the precise same way, either. Neither does my husband. You see, they are three very different people, and treating each of them identically would make no sense at all. One of my children always wanted chocolate birthday cakes. The other two preferred yellow cake on their birthdays. IMHO, it would have been rotten parenting to decree they all got the same type of cake in the name of fairness. More significantly, my firstborn son rarely broke rules, and therefore he had relatively few restrictions through high school. We asked him to let us know where he was, generally what he was doing, and to call us if he would be out later than he’d originally stated. He did so. My second son liked to push those limits and break more rules. Consequently, he spent his high school years with more restrictions placed upon him than his older brother had. He certainly felt we were being “unfair” and “favoring” his older brother at times, but that wasn’t the case. At that point in his life, he needed more supervision than his brother. And now that he’s finished almost two years in college--living almost entirely independently--he GETS the things we were trying to teach him then. He’s a wonderful young man, and we couldn’t love him or be any prouder of him. (And that was always true--even when we were lecturing and grounding him on a pretty regular basis! LOLOL!!)
We see very little of either Stark actually parenting most of the children, but what little we do get leads me to believe they attempted to deal with their individual children in much the same way--actually KNOWING them, recognizing what type of guidance they needed, and then attempting to give it to them. Not always successfully, of course. No parent--including myself, my husband, my own parents, or any parent I’ve ever known--always gets it right. Parenting is often kind of a trial and error process, unfortunately. But I think Ned and Cat love each of their children DIFFERENTLY because they are different people and treat each of their children DIFFERENTLY both because they are different people and because they are destined for different roles in their medieval world. And yes, BOTH Ned and Catelyn were traditional enough to believe their children would and should live fairly pre-determined lives according to their stations.
For Catelyn, I wrote a post 3 years ago entitled “Does Catelyn Stark Really Love All Her Children? Rather than repeat all that, I’ll link to that post here: http://dknc3.tumblr.com/post/85222770564/does-catelyn-stark-really-love-all-her-children 
The child I didn’t discuss in that post is Bran because the person to whom my friend had been responding in the first place acknowledged Cat loved Bran--and only Bran. Yes, she sits by his bedside obsessively, neglecting her other children to their detriment after his fall. But that is merely because she couldn’t emotionally get past what she saw as his overwhelming need for her in that moment. She didn’t want to neglect her other children. She simply felt compelled to somehow hold her son in this life by her physical presence. She couldn’t let him slip away without her. Was it healthy? No. Was it favoritism? Not truly. Because she’d have been the same way had it been any of her five children. As for thinking of Bran as her “sweet boy” and not wanting him to leave for King’s Landing with Ned in her POV--well, she didn’t want any of them to go. She was losing Ned. She was losing Sansa. She was losing Arya. And as Ned made the case for each of them to go, she forced herself to see the logic in it and accept it. But Bran was only 7. He’d been her baby for nearly four years until the birth of Rickon. And when Ned announced he was taking Bran, TOO, it was simply too much. She was now officially being asked to let go of her husband and over half her children, likely for YEARS. It was too much. Not because she favored Bran and loved him more than her girls, but because the entire situation was simply too much. And as she still considered him her “sweet boy” aka very young child, she’d honestly thought Ned would leave him with her just as he would Rickon.
Now, Ned is a bit different because as a medieval High Lord, he was much less involved in the daily raising of the children than Catelyn. He is written as a man who knows and WANTS to know more of his children than most men in his position, but still, she was the hands-on parent. The longest conversation we get to witness with Ned and one of his children is with Arya in King’s Landing. (Just like we only get to see Catelyn have long conversations with Robb.)  But in likelihood, Robb is the child most of the kids would have accused Ned of favoring through the years. As his heir, he’s the one Ned would spend the most time with, wanting to teach him all the things about being Lord of Winterfell that he himself had felt woefully unprepared for. Jon certainly didn’t feel favored, and I don’t see any evidence in canon that Ned cared more for Jon than he did his other children. Catelyn feared Ned favored him, of course, but I think that particular situation made Ned even more determined to walk a careful line where Jon was concerned. He loved Jon dearly. But a lot of what he did concerning Jon was as much for the sake of a promise to his sister as for Jon himself. In fact, Jon was a victim of Ned’s rather unfortunate habit of simply trying to ignore particularly difficult problems if he couldn’t see a good solution. He really should have made SOME sort of plan for Jon’s future. “I’ll keep him safe at Winterfell as my bastard” is just great for a baby or a small boy. Not so much for a grown man who would want a life of his own. Ned could count on Catelyn to help him see to the future for his other children, but Jon was all his, and he knew it. But he just kind of let Jon hang out at Winterfell in a sort of limbo. I honestly see Ned’s feelings toward Jon as laced with more guilt than favoritism.
We don’t get to see him much with Bran or Rickon, but we know leaving Bran was painful for him, and that when he receives word that Bran awoke, he holds an all night vigil in the godswood at King’s Landing with both his daughters. And while he is grateful that his son lives, he is still devastated by what he has lost and, I believe, is attempting to reassure himself as much as he is Arya, when he speaks of all the things Bran can still be now that he cannot be a knight. Also he’d recently taken Bran to his first execution. On the surface that seems a cold thing to subject a 7 year old to, but Ned is a man who believes in facing cold realities. The fact that he not only takes his 7-year-old along, but then has a conversation with him attempting to ensure he understood what was done and why it was done is actually evidence that he is as serious about raising his second true-born son to be every bit as honorable and just as his heir. Which is the opposite of favoritism. And had he lived long enough, I’ve no doubt he’d done the same with Rickon.
As for the girls, he has NO CLUE what to do with either of them. They were Catelyn’s job entirely much more so than the boys were. He at least knew what he wanted to teach his boys as they got older. Once the man left Winterfell with Sansa and Arya, he was in way over his head, and he didn’t do a particularly good job with either of them. To be fair, I think Ned was beyond depressed and certainly frustrated and alarmed about a great many things in King’s Landing, but he was a fairly neglectful father there for the most part, tbh. He had that wonderful conversation with Arya, but had allowed the situation between her and Sansa to reach a boiling point before that ever happened, and while he engaged Syrio in an effort to give her something, ANYTHING constructive to do to keep her a little happier, he didn’t really check in on her lessons after that and had no idea that she was wandering all over the Red Keep and even out of it. As for Sansa, he knew she was angry at him for killing Lady, and he just let her be--allowing her to become more and more influenced by Cersei. I do NOT think he favored Arya over Sansa at all. I think he had to DEAL WITH Arya more often simply because she was more willful and tended to get into more trouble. His paying her more attention wasn’t favoritism so much as it was the mistaken (but all too common) parental belief that the child who isn’t any trouble doesn’t need anything. His mistake. Sansa needed him badly. And in the end, he was willing to sacrifice both his honor and his life for her.
So, really long answer. But basically, NO. While there is likely some truth in your assertion that Ned and Cat might have found it easier to connect with some of their children than others (and that can be something that changes over time and in different situations), that does NOT equate to favoring any particular child. No parents are perfectly fair all the time. All children with siblings honestly feel that their parents play favorites at times. But, on the whole, I don’t believe either Ned or Catelyn had true, longstanding favorites among their children. They loved their children differently. But they loved them all without reservation.
12 notes · View notes