#I'm just celebrating by finally posting this cuz after so damn long I got another drabble prompt finished lol now I just have five left

[tigorrrr]

Kiss, kiss, breathe me in with every thousand, every thousand

My magic wand is in your hands

We won't play a game of "Cat and Mouse"

Your hands have already gone too far

This is just a happier end version of this drabble that I finally finished, although this drawing is not connected to the canon-ish drabble I would so love if they'd danced their arguments away ppffff

[family-video]

Introduction

Hello, not sure if anyone would ever read this but I'll say it anyway. I'm tired of living like this. With AI, constant modernization, instant gratification, all of it. I know I'll sound old and bitter, but bear with me. Im 23 years old, and over a decade of my life has been owned by the internet.

When I was 11, I was given my first tablet. I used it mostly to play games, but I began obsessively scrolling on iFunny and Tumblr. If I wasn't doing that, then I was watching Youtube. I spent hours on it every day, cycling through the apps. Then when I was 13, I got my first smartphone. It somehow got even worse. I had access to every social media now, and I wanted every hour of my waking day spent scrolling on Instagram, snapchat, twitter, everything and anything I could download. I spent my years like this until I was 18, and COVID hit.

As I was bored in quarantine, I finally realized something-I felt empty. I was no longer surrounded by anyone, I had no one to prove myself to. I turned off my phone and reflected for awhile, and realized how deeply I missed life before social media.

Before I turned 11, I was truly living. And the world felt alive with me. Some might argue that perhaps I only felt that way because I was a child, but I disagree. I know there was a shift there. When I was a kid, before the internet entered my household, I woke up on the weekends- and did nothing. There was no phone to grab and immediately scroll on. I would lay, look at the ceiling, or glance at the ticking Hello Kitty clock mounted on the wall to know if it was too early to get up for the day. Once I was up, I would sit at the table and eat my breakfast. I would read my books, play on my DSi, or play with my littlest pet shop figures. I would go outside to blow bubbles, or sit in front of the TV to watch SpongeBob.

Then if my parents felt like going out to eat, we would. We would go to Texas Roadhouse and not mind the long wait, and then go to my favorite place in the world- Family Video. In there I would spend all my time looking at the video games before renting something I liked and going home.

I don't know if this makes sense, but things felt so alive. The world felt almost sparkly. Everywhere we went was busy, but no one seemed to mind.

However, now, I feel like things are dull. Dead. Again, I do not think this is because I am an adult.

Now I wake up, and I immediately grab my phone. Even when I try my best not to, I subconsciously do it. I read through my unimportant notifications and scroll on TikTok or instagram reels before thinking "What the hell am I doing? I need to get up!" When I do get up, I eat my breakfast while scrolling on twitter, reading unimportant things like celebrity drama.

Then if my boyfriend and I don't feel like going anywhere for the weekend, we sit, and we scroll, and we watch YouTube, and play Roblox. (Yes, I am aware I am too old for that. But playing Bloxy Bingo with my siblings is too much fun.) And if we feel like eating out, we don't even go out. We simply order off DoorDash, sit, and wait. And I plan on digging into this "instant gratification" thing in another post, but I will say that it feels so dull.

Another thing too is that both my boyfriend and I have anxiety- and going out to stores doesn't necessarily feel the same anymore. Ok, here is where I will hear someone out if they say "well it's cuz you were a kid!". Is it just me, or after COVID did everyone forget basic manners? I can't walk into Target without feeling like I'm going to have a heart attack. Everyone is cutting you off abruptly, or walking so quickly behind you they're almost stepping on your shoes. And NO ONE says excuse me. Sure we don't have to, but it would be a little nice if I had a clue that you were trying to get past me in an aisle without bumping my shoulder.

This stressful experience leads me to want to isolate myself further. And as I head to the car, sweat dripping down my forehead from damn near running to leave, I get a notification on my phone from my crime app telling me that there was a super terrible tragedy nearby that instills the feeling in me that I need to stay home.

I need to stay safe inside, continue door dashing, continue scrolling.

But I'm done with it. I have felt the desire to abandon this lifestyle for a couple of years now, but this time im going to do it- and I mean it.

I am going to live like its the 2000s again.

Yes, I am aware that I could never truly go back to the way things were before. And there are in fact modern things I want to keep in my life. Modern interests, etc. But what I mean is I don't only want to quit social media (besides Tumblr so I can write), but I want to go back to some of the technologies that genuinely worked just fine. In an ever changing world, I can appreciate that we make technological advances every single day. But maybe we don't need to.

I know this is long, and again I am unsure if anyone read this. But if they did, sorry for the rambling, and thank you for reading my thoughts.

So without further ado, here I go- back into my imaginary time machine.

[harold231]

It wasn't real

Pairing: Bucky x reader

Posted: 04/30/2021

Word count: 2.5k

Warnings: None? Maybe a lil angst just a lel bet.

A/N: I think it might be good? Idk You let me know. But like frfr, don't just give me feedback in your mind, put it into words. Also I apparently have a thing for Bucky in a dotted apron soooo yeah.

FYI: time zone/era is open for interpretation. Bucky never became an avenger/soldat and steve isn't part of this one.

The wind that blew around you was warm and sweet with the scent of freshly bloomed flowers. Perhaps it was an act of kindness from some God trying to distract you from the cold bitterness settling into your bones. Closing your eyes you conjure the very memory that left you so desolate.

The sun snuck it's way through the curtains to illuminate the room, effectively disturbing the sleep that you always seemed to be craving. Waking up is always hassle but whenever you remember that you get to spend your day with the only person who tolerates you and you him, getting out of bed is the easiest thing. Bucky is crazy and the damn boy is never in one spot for to long and he always has something to say, but you can't imagine how boring your days would be if you guys had never met. well technically if your parents had never met.

When you were a child you parents had to move to new york for business and they decided that Brooklyn was the place to be. You had been Bucky's neighbor and the first day you guys moved in his mom had dragged him over with the most delicious angel food cake that he so proudly claimed to have made mostly on his own. He just loved cooking and baking since forever, he would tell you that he just liked experimenting with foods but you knew the truth was that the boy liked to eat and didn't have the patience to wait for his mother to come home.

Only a few years after your family had moved to Brooklyn you and Bucky had already built an unbreakable bond. You guys had found a beautiful cherry tree one day when playing tag and had deemed it to be your's and Bucky's spot. Whenever you had a bad day or needed time away from the world you guys would go to the tree and just pick cherries, in the winter time you and Bucky would lay under the tree and kick the trunk so that the snow would fall from the leaves. It was the place where at only 15 years old bucky swore he would open his own Bakery and to quote him "I'm serving my ma's food my way doll, It's gonna be the next best thing to hit New York."

You were laying on the ground with your hands crossed behind your head looking up at Bucky swinging upside down from a branch when he told you all this. You felt something you had never felt before at that moment, looking up at the wild haired boy who loved to eat, loved his family, and had the most ambition you had ever heard from kids your age. Your heart felt full and your cheeks grew warm as you looked up at the same blue eyes you had know for years now, only this time you notice the way they twinkle in the sunlight and how rosy his lips are. Now 7 years laters you and Bucky were preparing to open the very bakery he promised you he'd open. Banners were beautifully strung along the walls and cute retro china was set out, ready to be filled for opening day. There was no hesitation from you when Bucky had asked you to run the bakery with him, you were excited to spend your days with the person you hoped you would spend the rest of your life with.

At around 6:30 in the morning you had arrived at the bakery but it seemed that Bucky had beat you to it. The smell of fresh angel food cake and cocoa danced up your nose as soon as you opened the door. Closing your eyes you smiled at the memories that it brought back. Moving to the back you grabbed your Disney themed apron and placed your bag and coat in its place before scurrying over to the kitchen while trying (and failing) to tie your apron. There in all his dorkiness was Bucky wiggling around to the chordettes. He knew that you loved the 50's aesthetic so he found a way to incorporate it without going overboard, by adding little trinkets, a jukebox, and even those cute little dining tables. In fact at the moment he was wearing a ruffly red polka dotted apron as he frosted some cupcakes.

Apron tied, you were finally ready to get to work. You walked up to Bucky bumping his hip as you reached for some cupcake pans, "Whatcha doin here so early Buck, we don't open until 12" he looks at you with squinted eyes, "The hell are you doing here so early." "Woah,woah,woah completely unprovoked. I'm just saying cuz' you were the one complaining about the opening time being set at 8. Like damn." Breathing out a huff of air he wipes his forehead with a towel "I'm sorry doll, I'm just super nervous and I couldn't sleep so I came to start baking things. I already frosted the ice cream cakes and I just finished the pies, but I was thinking that maybe we needed some cupcakes too, even though we already baked so many pastries and stuff last night I'm worried it won't be enough."

Setting down the trays you move to hug Bucky from behind holding him close to you. "Buck I know we'll do great your food is too good to pass up on especially when it's free." You place a soft kiss to his shoulder " I promise you'll do great, everything you do is amazing you try your hardest at everything Buck, You've worked your butt off and made mine considerably larger to get here, don't start losing your mind on me now." A cute little laugh from Bucky lets you know that he's hearing you and he isn't so stressed anymore. "I just want this to be perfect ya know?" with your head still against his back you nod, "I just want it to be a special day for my special girl."

You couldn't stop the slight blush that rose to your cheeks or the way that your heart suddenly started beating three times faster. You had also wanted to make him something special which is why you had got here so early. Finally releasing your hold on Bucky you straighten your apron out before gathering everything you need for some red velvet cupcakes. Bucky loved your red velvet cake so you loved making it for him. After hours of mixing, baking, and frosting had passed, you guys were rewarded with a bakery that looked as great as it smelled. "Alright doll, I'm heading out, I gotta go get ready. Meet you back here at 12 , Love ya." He didn't even give you a chance to answer as he ran right out the door. "Love you too."

You had stayed behind just a little while longer as you perfected your secret project. Carefully you added snowflakes to some of the cupcakes because you knew how much he loved snow even if he hated winter, some cats, flowers that reminded you of bucky, and one extra special cupcake. When you finish you decide to clean up a bit more and prepare some drinks for later before heading home to get ready. As soon as you got home you took a shower and did the simplest of make up with a light pink lip. You had decided to wear a dress to match the blossoming flowers that spring had brought. Pink with a yellow lace trim and flowers embroided all over the dress, matching it with some yellow flats.

You had decided that it was a perfect day for a walk so you grabbed a light scarf and slung it over your shoulders, grabbed Bucky's cupcakes, and headed over to the bakery. You felt as if a Hundred pounds had been lifted from your shoulders knowing that Bucky had felt the same way about you. You had decided that you would tell him today with your special cupcakes. As you rounded the corner you felt giddy and you couldn't wipe the smile from your face no matter how hard you tried. As you reached the bakery you saw that a majority of the people had already arrived and you knew that it would put Bucky at ease to see all the people enjoying his food. You stopped at the window, closing your eyes to take a deep breath to prepare yourself to join the celebration.

Opening your eyes you reached for the handle only to stop at the sight on the other side of the door. Bucky stood there arms wrapped around a woman eyes locked on hers as he leaned in for a kiss. It must have all happened in about 30 seconds but it felt as if time himself had slowed it down for you to watch the way he tilted her head and ran his tongue along her bottom lip before finally uniting their lips. Your heart dropped as quickly as your smile did and suddenly you felt so stupid for thinking this could be real. You willed yourself not to cry as you allowed your legs to carry you anywhere but there.

That's how you found yourself sitting underneath a blossoming cherry tree. A tree that held only happy memories because it wasn't a place you could be sad... back then. With your back against the tree and box of cupcakes full of unrequited love in your lap you realize how much you over romanticized Bucky. Opening the box you decide it would be a shame to let them go to waste. The first one you grab has a big red heart frosted in the middle, you let out a deep sigh before breaking the cupcake right down the middle. You shove half of the cupcake into your mouth and only then do you allow the tears to fall. You sat there for hours crying eating cupcakes, watching the sunset, and thinking about everything that Bucky did for you, as a friend. You realize you had no right to be angry at Bucky, after all you never told him how you felt you just assumed that he would feel the same way after so many years. With every broken memory another cupcake vanished.

He was always there for you, when no one wanted to come to your slumber party Bucky did and he even did all the girly things with you. Painting your nails, doing your hair, watching chick flicks, and pillow fights. once he even asserted that no one could protect you as well as he could, when you had decided to go camping with your friend from class so he insisted on taking you himself. Your friend was most noticeably gay so you had assumed he wanted to spend time alone with you. But now that you think back on those memories these are things that anyone would do for their bestfriend. And that's what you realized 8 hours and 11 cupcakes later.

The moon floated above you and as it's white rays settled upon the lake you decided it might be time to go home now. You get up and dust your dress off before leaning down to grab the mostly empty box. Turning around you are stopped again by what's in front of you. Bucky stands there brows furrowed as his eyes flash from you to the box in your hands. "Where the hell have you been, I've been calling you all day." swallowing the lump in your throat you go to answer but are interrupted. " everyone's been asking me about you all night and I had no damn idea what to tell them, but apparently you were just out here being inconsiderate. You go and tell me I can do great tonight, that you'd be there for me, but you weren't." You try to answer him but are again interrupted. "You could have told me something earlier instead of leaving me there like a dumb-" "SHUT UP!" this time it was your turn to interrupt him.

Taking a deep breath you look into his eyes before explaining. "Of course I was ready to be there today, you think I wore this dress to sit under a damn tree? Well I didn't. When I left my apartment I was ready and I was excited, so excited. I couldn't even stop smiling on my way over, but then I got to the shop and I saw-" Immediately you stopped as you realized what you were about to say. He cocked an eyebrow and shook his head slightly as if to say 'Hello?' "You saw what? What did you see that would make you abandon ship just like that?" Shame flushed through your being and you could no longer keep eye contact. "Nothing, you know what, it doesn't even matter. I'm sorry I was being dramatic I should have been an adult and dealt with it on my own time. And I'm sorry I abandoned you all, but the night was about you anyways."

"The night was supposed to be about the both of us so it does matter if you saw something that made you want to leave. Just tell me doll, what did you see?" his voice is soft as he pleads with you. "I saw... well I saw you kissing that lady and I just wanted get away and ended up here okay!?" You said it all in a jumble hoping that he wouldn't be able to understand what you had said. But luck wasn't your friend so of course he did. "So seeing me kiss another person was so gross to you that you had to run away, what the hell? are you 13 again?" You hadn't admitted it outloud yet and it seemed that the dumbass in front of you was going to force it out of you.

Stepping around Bucky you pull your scarf tight around your body as you focus on not crying anymore until you get home. You distract yourself by thinking of all the love you saw in all the little things Bucky did for you. Dancing around the newly furnished bakery body against body as frank sinatra brought you heart to heart, watching rom-coms and ugly crying together, but by the time you get home you force yourself to face the ugly truth. The Love was always in your head. It wasn't real.

A new wave of tears blurred your vision as teardrops fell perfectly to the ground. "It's because I have feelings for you Bucky, and I now know you don't feel the same way." Sniffling you don't bother looking up because your heart is to broken for that right now. "I'm Just gonna need a little bit of time and I'll be back good as new like nothing even happened." Still unable to lift your gaze from the ground you decide to focus on the last cupcake left in the box. 'I Love You' is written in tiny light blue frosting letters. "I uhm, uhh." That brought your attention to Bucky, as embarrassment pulsed as strong as ever through your veins. " You don't have to say anything Buck, It's fine, I'll see you next week, on monday" you hand him the box as you go to pass him "I think you would have a better use for this than me I ate 11 others already so."

Divider credits: @firefly-graphics

[kari-izumi]

I'm another who knew far, far more about the discourse and drama than I did about the show....and I can get how Klance would've been a rival ship to Sheith, even without all the absolute insane amounts of wank that was created, at least from how it was written before season 4.

But the way Sheith comes across...yeah. You're right. That part of fandom was bullied and silenced into hiding or leaving the fandom entirely, and there's no bigger proof of that than how this ship jumped ten whole spots on @fandom 's ship list to the #2 spot the following Monday after Season 6 was released--and more tellingly, it's stayed near the top of that list for all of the past 6 months

As it happened, I'd just by sheer coincidence binged the entire show the week before with no knowledge the schedule or that a season 6 was around the corner, but I'd seen enough discourse on my dash to know Sheith fans were getting the bum end of the stick. And then S6 aired and we got Keith Saying the Thing(tm) and oh boy, that was a fun two weeks.

I've never been on the "winning" side of canon aside from Bleach (which is a very hollow victory at best) and I've been around the block awhile to make my own content, so it's been a different fandom experience for me to be around happy shippers who celebrate with their ample canon moments. But it was made more sweet hearing the stories of fans who came back to the show after being run out months before; fans who'd been receiving hate from the beginning now getting validation; older fans like myself who remember a time when the only queer rep we got as kids were coded Disney villains and to "cousins" in the Sailor Moon dub.

Lots of good stuff.

And yet, it saddens me that all most will remember about VLD is the mountain load of insane fandom bullshit instead of the talented artists and writers who do so much to show their love and will be here still, long after antis have wrecked havoc on She Ra and TDP.

I also wish Fandometrics were having it's weekly ship list for December, because I would've loved to see Sheith at the #1 spot after S8, where it absolutely deserves to be.

AHAHAHA disregard that last paragraph, cuz I wrote most of this weeks ago and forgot I had this sitting in drafts. Fandometrics is gonna look pretty interesting next week when it comes back for damn sure after that finale.

But yeah, I still stand what I said here, even post-finale. Hell, especially post-finale.

Quick musing;

So like, here’s the thing with me and Sheith (and the fandom as a whole).

When I watched the show with my sister, it was just sorta something for us to do. We’d heard of it, of course, and were fairly familiar with how angry Klantis would get, but we never had much interest until she finished a third rewatch of Call the Midwife and suddenly needed filler. I didn’t set out to join the fandom. Hell, even once I paid attention I was never super invested. 

Then I saw Keith and Shiro.

I was honestly, completely stunned how blatantly intimate their interactions feel… and the fact that no one told me. How is it not everywhere? It’s… it’s just. It’s obvious.

Like. Take fandom back seven years, and we’d see Sheith everywhere. I’m talking Johnlock levels, gifs and gifs and more gifs, cutesy edits spam-reblogged unaccredited, thousands of teenagers going hearteyes over every episode. The prevalence and intrusiveness would be stunning.

And sure, I’m glad the current shippers are more mature then that, but it’s kinda sad for me to think about how a natural, seamless pairing was bullied into minority status. I feel like there’s a lot of people who would watch, and adore, Voltron if they knew much about Sheith outside of discourse bullshit. So many people robbed of potentially life-defining fandom.

(That’s absolutely not to say you have to ship it, btw. It’s more that I think there’s people who would if they hadn’t been scared away.)

I’m still not really in the fandom–at least, my interest is very specific and casual, catered towards certain creators and dynamics–but, I gotta say, Sheith honestly feels canon. The fact that the big, beautiful, emotional, incredibly animated human-on-human action scene was with evil!Shiro and Keith just cements where the crew’s interest seems to be.

If it stays platonic, that’s fine. I’m not invested enough for it to bother me nor would I fault the crew. But it’s sorta insane that I hadn’t heard about any of this and had to discover it completely on my own when it’s a major fandom.