#I'm in the process of letting go and moving to another place too so this one just... resonates with my soul. deeply.

[bewires]

prev tags by @lazaefair just to add - I've been writing, posting, publishing in one way or another since I was eleven. that is two decades ago. my work did not start good (and it's debatable if it's good now lol). I started out on fanfiction.net posting my take on sirius black falling in love with an OC or two minor characters from a tamora pierce book revealing their secret relationship (some things never change) before moving on to livejournal and then ao3. I've never been a great line editor so I'm sure there were typos galore from the get-go (and sometimes there still are!)

I got all sorts of comments in that time. most were truly lovely and I treasure them greatly! some were concrit. and I cannot tell you whether or not they were helpful or polite in tone, because I don't remember. what I do remember is that receiving one critical comment on my dumb sirius black x oc fanfic pointing out how derivative it was of other fanworks made me discontinue the whole thing. I was maybe 12, 13? I also received a valid criticism about a line a character uses in a stargate atlantis fic on livejournal when I was probably 15 and I was so embarrassed I reacted really negatively and pretended the criticism wasn't valid. I'm actually still too embarrassed by it to admit what it was.

receiving concrit at that age did nothing to help me improve, not even because these reviewers weren't good at giving it (I honestly have no idea anymore), but because I was not ready to hear it. fanfic was the only place I felt confident in my abilities and getting positive feedback was what made me keep writing and pursue publishing my own books later on. seeing criticism -- publicly posted criticism! -- on fics I worked hard on and wanted to share with other fans made me want to curl up and never write again.

but I kept writing and I (imo) improved loads. not from criticism, but from reading and engaging in other people's works, seeing what else was out there, and practicing. that's how people learn in fan communities - collaboratively and from each other. derivative (derivative, not plagiarized) in fanworks which are themselves derivative of an original work ought to be a compliment imo.

since, I like to think I've gotten much better at taking criticism to my work and learning from it. part of that is life experience (college and being graded on writing at a higher level, the editorial process of writing an original book). part of that is having gained a baseline confidence in myself which I did not have at that age and thus the ability to separate myself from my work.

I still don't think criticism belongs publicly on fanworks though! posting a comment on a fanfic is like shouting directly in the author's ear. if you're criticizing my actual published books you can buy for real money, have at it, although please don't feel the need to email me directly, this is what goodreads and storygraph are for. but fanfic is barely edited and just for fun, you don't have to take it seriously. my one exception is that I will always be open to commenters telling me something I wrote came off as insensitive and do edit accordingly.

as a side note, a few years ago i deleted my fanfiction.net account and as I was doing so I discovered that at twelve I was an asshole who left concrit on some other fics. and let me tell you, if I was not ready to hear criticism I was also not ready to give it in a meaningful and sensitive way.

Abt that unsolicited ‘concrit’ on fanfic thing

My personal opinion is that you should never offer unsolicited critical feedback to people, and you should only offer it publicly at all under specific circumstances. Why?

- Very few people actually know how to give ‘concrit’. They think it just means saying there were surface errors, or they didn’t like how someone was characterized. That’s not concrit. That’s not useful, at all. That’s an amateur review from someone with little to no relevant expertise.

- Especially where it regards fanfiction, you can’t know who you’re speaking to. You can’t moderate tone or intensity of criticism based on their experience and relative skill level. It’s possible that harsh or even moderate critique could make them stop writing forever. Why? What is the point of taking away someone’s joy in that manner? So that the commenter can feel satisfied that they corrected them? That’s cruel and childish.

- Usually fanfiction is published in only one place— maybe three or four, at most. Why should authors be expected to put up with negative criticism in the ONLY place their work is available? Are published authors expected to attach one star Goodreads reviews to their bookjackets?

- If you genuinely wish to help someone improve their writing, you can do so by speaking personally with them and offering your help. The assertion that criticism from a stranger whose opinion they don’t value and whose qualifications are unknown is going to make them better is disingenuous. If someone is sincere in their desire to assist an author in progressing on their writing journey, they should demonstrate that through investing appropriate time and effort. Otherwise, there are many places to complain away from the author’s sight. The only thing accomplished by doing so in front of them is making them feel bad— and if that is someone’s intent, that’s reprehensible.

Anyway. I’ve never gotten useful concrit in my comments or my bookmarks, and I expect I never will.

[bunnieneedsacarrot]

I want to be a maid. Pretty frilly dress and apron. Dressed all cute and pretty. My collar on. My nipples placed securely in their loop clamps.

You come home and need to relax. I make you tea. You pull me in after I've set down the tray. In my mouth you place a gummy. Then you have me take a few hits of your dab pen. I'm to take a hit every few minutes after that. Your hands move to your belt. Then your cock it out.

I take a hit.

You move me so that I sit on your semi hardness. You slip in easily. I hold in a moan as I am just the help. My pleasure doesn't matter. You settle inside of me. A few thrusts to harden you up a bit, but that's not the point. Oh no. I am to cock work you as you relax.

Another hit.

My head feels fuzzy and my body buzzed from the weed. My vaginal walls clench around your member as they adjust for yours and my comfort. Two more thrusts before you lean me into the crook of your neck. You've begun sipping your tea and scrolling on your ipad.

Another hit.

It's hard to tell how long has past between hits. I do my best to stay still, not to let my vaginal walls move too much. Just trying to let you relax. You tap me on the butt.

I take hit.

Your hand idly moves down to my ass. You rub and knead. My breathing picks up. My hardened nipples rub against your chest and the fabric of my dress. You tap my rose bud. I nod solemnly.

I take a hit. One too big for me.

I cough. You laugh. The edible hits and my brain goes numb. I can feel you pour lube on my ass. I can feel the cold metal of my anal toy being pressed in. I can feel my vaginal walls contract and release around your member.

I groan. You tap me. I take a hit conditioned to.

Your fucking me. I wake up to it. I'm hazy. My hips are rolling, and I can feel an orgasm coming on. Instincts have kicked in, and I'm ready to be bred.

"Please, please, please..." I beg grinding harder and harder into your lap.

You laugh. Something in my brain freaks out at that laugh. I don't have time to process because I cum hard. All of my muscles spasm. And you keep going until you release within me.

We both take a moment to catch our breaths.

Once we have, you say something low and slow in my ear. "You've forgotten your place, Maid."

I return to reality for just a moment before you pull me off of your cock. I stand before you an absolute mess, almost out of my mind, and you take me in.

"Turn around and open your legs," you command.

I whimper yet do as I'm told. I even spread open my cheeks for easier access.

"How does twenty pussy slaps sound?" Your finger reaches forward and plays with my slit dripping with your cum.

"It would be my pleasure Master."

[savage-rhi]

I'm very much a, "fuck yeah and fuck you, I don't need validation! I'm me, cunts!" kinda fella, but sometimes I could use support.

[sovamurka]

Where jasmine blooms, my beloved <3 😭

[ssahotchnerr]

okay imagine a reader who’s clumsy asfff, and aaron is always there to stop her from falling flat on her face ahaha

falling for you

cw; clumsy bau!reader, established relationship, aaron's injured and minor blood mentions, angst? if you squint, fluff <3

A rural town surrounded by acres of woods: a serial killer's perfect playing field. Plenty of remote, secluded places to dump victims.

The trail on which you were walking was barely passable; narrow, obstructing hanging branches, the dirt path littered with slippery rocks due to the rainstorm the night prior.

One wrong step, poor footing on an angle, could result in sliding down a steep ledge. It wasn't comparable to a cliff - an eight foot incline at least - but could easily result in injury nonetheless.

Which naturally you of all people were bound to intercept; always moving too quickly for your own good, more focused on the destination rather than the journey - ultimately feeding into your habitual clumsiness.

Aaron took notice of the rock slab before you did, reaching out suddenly to grab at your arm the second your foot took a dive off the side. While you managed to escape unscathed due to his heroism, he wasn't as fortunate.

You had coerced him onto the passenger seat - if it were up to him, the two of you would've continued to the crime scene - cleaning and bandaging the bloody gash on his forehead yourself. He hadn't fallen, but knocked into a firm, solid branch, as well as scraped his arm on another, ripping his sleeve in the process.

"Stop moving so much."

Aaron's chest huffed in a faint laugh, "I'm not even moving."

A subtle glare came from you, "You could be concussed."

"I'm not concussed. Banged up maybe, but not concussed."

"Maybe?" The sight before you tore at your heart, Aaron's pretty face scraped up. "You mean definitely. And prove it."

A clever, amused expression formed on his face, "The United States government consists of-"

"Okay, okay." You surrendered with a playful eye roll, dismissing his impending recitation.

Admittedly you were flustered, solely for the fact that it should've been you - the one bumped up and bleeding. Your bottom lip was sticking out in a pout, cleaning his wound with an alcohol wipe.

He winced briefly at the sting, eyes watching your movements. "I know what you're thinking."

"You should've let me take the fall." As if by clockwork, the bandaid in your hand fell onto the wet asphalt. Annoyedly you reached down to pick it up, hastily tossing it to the SUV's floor before grabbing a fresh one from the first aid kit.

Aaron scoffed lightly, "Yeah, right."

"I'm serious," Your lip jut out even more, pulling your gaze to his exasperatedly. "Or Morgan should've at least accompanied you."

"Sweetheart, you know I'm in better company when you're around."

"He's more coordinated than I am," you insisted, your fingers fumbling together as you peeled the bandaid open, smoothing it over his broken skin. Carefully. You repeated the same for the gash on his forearm. "He can duck and leap from side to side without a second thought, has a much faster reaction time and, well, he's Morgan."

"Sweetheart-"

"He's not clumsy," you huffed out, crumbling the plastic in your fist. Your clumsiness, as incredibly inconvenient as it was, had never 'bothered' you to an extent.

But now that you had caused Aaron to get hurt, everything changed. It was a surprise it hadn't happened sooner, and it was only a matter of time before you caused another incident. One with a larger, more menacing result.

"In a terrain that's damp and woodsy and has twigs and leaves poking out, I should be the farthest person away," you rambled, covered with guilt. "Why they even let me join the field in the first place... I don't know."

"Because you're an outstanding profiler, have a keen eye that catches details the rest of us overlook, never backs down despite heinous barriers. Must I go on? I can, the list is quite extensive."

"Regardless, it doesn't excuse the fact I'm accident prone." You insisted, your sentence ending on a deep sigh.

"You aren't-"

"Aaron," you interrupted, "how many times have you reached out to stop me from flying into a table, or have reminded me to slow down. Look what just happened."

"You didn't fall because you're clumsy, honey. You fell- no, tripped because it rained and your shoes lacked the proper traction."

"But because of me, you're hurt." Your voice wavered the smallest amount, you could cry if pushed.

"And I'd do it again if it meant saving you." He leaned forward, pressing a kiss to the corner of your mouth, eyeing the CSI agents not too far away. "And again," Another kiss, this time on your lips, "and again. It's a small price to pay if you're unharmed."

"Kissing me at a crime scene? You must be concussed." You quipped softly, lips itching to smile. Although you wanted to continue sulking, he was making it awfully difficult.

A laugh exited him; the rare laugh of his that minimal people experienced, and one that could lift your spirits in less than a milli-second. "How many times do I need to tell you? I'm not concussed."

You still weren't convinced - your inelegant tendencies not to disappear by morning - but you did feel better compared to how you felt five minutes ago. "Thank you."

Your hand grabbed onto his arm lovingly, a grateful gesture, but produced an immediate flinch from Aaron.

Your eyes widened in horror, heart nearly stopping, "I'm so-"

"You're welcome." Aaron stopped you, grabbing your hand and providing a reassuring squeeze. His expression was kind, compassionate although you should've been the one soothing him.

You exhaled deeply after a moment, readjusting his rolled-up cuff sleeve. "I owe you a new shirt too."

He smiled, his hand lifting to chuck you under your chin gently. "I'll add it to your tab."

[chancloud8]

Keep Playing

Pairing: Bang Chan x Reader

Word Count: 2,8k

Summary: you tease chan while he plays the piano. he returns te favor, nearly destroying his piano in the process.

Tags: nsfw, smut, oral (m), a little touch denial, fingering, cumshot, piano s3x, just pure smut.

It started out innocent, with Chan playing random songs on his piano to help you relax. 

You've always enjoyed watching him play. You could sit there for hours, listening to the melody and watching his fingers move over the keys as he too got cought up in the music. When he played you could just feel the stress leaving your body, your muscles would relax and your eyes would automatically close. 

This time however. This time you're on your knees. 

'What are you doing?' Chan asks, his head cocked to the side and his eyebrows raised as he watches you settle on the floor between his legs. 

He stops playing and you pout up at him, patting his thighs with the palms of your hands. 

'Keep playing, babe,' you instruct him. 'Don't mind me. Just pretend I'm not here.' 

He raises his eyebrows at you as if to say 'Yeah sure, like I can do that?!' 

'You can,' you say as you slowly let your fingers wander over his thighs and towards the tied strings of his sweatpants. 'Please play for me baby.' 

Chan opens his mouth to protest, but when you stroke him over the fabric of his pants he closes his eyes in defeat and moves his fingers towards the keys of the piano again. Music starts to fill the room again and you smile in victory, moving your other hand upwards as well so you can grab the waistband of his sweatpants and tug a little. 

'Keep playing, but lift your hips,' you tell Chan, looking up at him through your lashes.

Chan swallows and does as you say, allowing you to slide his pants down. As instructed he keeps playing, but when you press your lips to the inside of his thighs, he messes up a few keys.

You giggle and push his thighs open further, watching goosebumps appear on his skin when you crawl even closer between his legs and kiss a trial towards the place on his leg where his boxers end.

'Y/N,' Chan whines when you pull at the fabric with your teeth before once again moving your hand up to trace the outline of his cock teasingly.

'Yes, my love?'

'Please don't make me keep playing, I want to touch you.'

You squeeze Chan's thighs and lift your head to look at him. 

'If you touch me, you can't play for me and if you don't play..' you nip at his thigh with your teeth. 'You won't get my mouth where you want it.' 

Chan groans and throws his head back in frustration, but his fingers keep moving on the keys, playing one of your favorite songs. He barely wavers when you press a kiss on his growing bulge so you decide to go a step further and close your mouth over his length, wetting the fabric of his boxers. 

'Fuck,' Chan mutters, his fingers slipping off the keys. 

You chuckle and wait till he starts playing again to tug at his boxers till it rips. Chan lifts his hips again and you easily slip the fabric off, freeing his long hard cock. There's a drop of pre cum on the tip and you happily lean forward to lick it off. 

Chan whimpers and messes up the melody again. You briefly wonder what the neighbours will think of the melody going up and down from good to bad, because they could definitely hear him play. 

'Y/N, please,' Chan pants. 'Please.' 

You know he wants to stop playing to touch you, to make you pay for teasing him like this, but you're not done with him yet. He'll get you back no matter what you do and you're already looking forward to it. 

'All in time babe,' you whisper. 'Just be good for me and I'll be good for you.'

He groans again and switches to a different melody, one you don't recognize, but it sounds pretty non the less. You don't give Chan any warning before closing your mouth around the tip of his cock, your tongue pressing against the underside as you softly suck and lick up another drop of pre cum.

'Fuck, fuck, fuck,' Chan mutters out, his body collapses forward and his fingers smash against the keys.

You wait till he finds the right notes again and gently wrap your fingers around the base of his cock while your tongue swirls around the tip. Even more salty liquid coats your tongue and you hum in delight at the taste. He might complain, but he sure as hell loves what you're doing.

'This is so unfair,' Chan moans, bucking his hips.

You ignore him and take his cock deeper in your mouth, bobbing your head as you messily suck and move your tongue up and down to slowly drive him insane.

The song Chan was playing ends abruptly and his hands find your hair, pulling hard. You let go of him with a wet 'pop' sound and look up through your eyelashes.

'What's the matter babe,' you tease, licking your lips. 'I thought you understood the rules.'

'Screw the rules,' Chan growls. 'If I have to suffer, you can at least take off your clothes.'

Chan's eyes are wild, his pupils so dilated that the black nearly swallows the brown. It's incredibly hot and you fight the urge to just stop this game and jump your very sexy boyfriend.

'Okay,' you nod and smile sweetly at him, bringing your hands up to cover his.

Chan's grip relaxes and he moves forward to get closer to you.

'Nuh-uh,' you shake your head. 'I didn't mean you could touch me. You're going to keep playing and I'm going to take off my clothes.'

Chan glares at you and you just know he's debating whether to give you your fun or if he'll take over control.

'You like my mouth on you, right?' You wink,  caressing his muscled chest with your hands. 'If you keep playing for me, I'll give you everything you want.'

'I already have you,' Chan counters. 'I'll play for a little while longer, but then you're mine.'

'I'm yours,' you grin, ignoring what he actually means.

Chan rolls his eyes and lets go of your hair so he can place his hands on the piano keys again. He starts playing the same song as before, his eyes locked on yours.

You bite your lips and try to look as sexy as possible as you pull your soft cotton dress over your head.

Chan makes a noise in the back of his throat that sounds like a mixture between a groan and a whine when he sees what you wear underneath.

Nothing but a black lace thong.

His eyes rake over your chest hungrily and his fingers twitch over the keys of the piano. He keeps playing though.

'Good,' you praise, leaning down again to reward him with a kiss on the inside of his thigh.

Chan's cock twitches against his stomach and you take it in your hands, slowly stroking the soft skin and leaning forward to lick a thick stripe all the way from the base to the tip.

'Do. Not. Tease. Me,' Chan let's out between pants.

You nod and take him in your mouth, enjoying the heavy feel of him against your tongue. He's warm, hard as a rock and the tip is soaked with pre-cum again. You circle your tongue around to tip to lick it up before taking him deeper.

Chan's hips buck forward at their own account and his pants get louder, but to his credit he keeps playing this time. 

You increase your rhythm and move your hand along with your mouth, coaxing more sounds out of Chan's throat. His leg tenses under your free hand and his hips buck forward again, more powerful than before, the tip of his cock grazes the back of your throat. You moan around him, knowing the vibration of the sound will make it feel even better for him.

'Aarghh,' Chan groans. 'Y/N, fuck.' 

Drool leakes from the corner of your mouth, but you don't care. This is about Chan, about his pleasure. 

'If you don't stop, I'll--' Chan starts to say, but you suck harder and twirl your tongue just the way he likes it to silence him. 

The music stops with a loud clunk of Chan's hands coming down so hard on the keys, that it hurts your ears. You look up from under your eyelashes to see the exposed skin of Chan's throat as he tilts his head backwards, his mouth agape in pleasure. 

It only takes one more twirl of your tongue and then he's coming in your mouth. Hot, sticky and salty. You swallow every drop as you caress Chan's thighs with your hands before letting go of him. 

'Now wasn't that fun,' you grin up at him, only to be met with a nearly feral looking Chan. 

The veins in his neck are clearly visible and he has this look in his eyes that makes you clench your thighs together. 

Uh. Oh. 

You don't get a chance to tease him some more as he pulls you up from under the piano by your hair. It doesn't hurt at all, all it does is makes heat pool in your belly. 

His lips are on yours then, hard and demanding while his hands roam your naked skin. You gasp when he lifts you up and his tongue wastes no time invading your mouth. The both of you groan and you climb into Chan's lap, wrapping your legs around his waist to get as close to him as you can. 

Chan's hands grab onto your naked ass, massaging the flesh as he kisses you like he's starving. It's messy and wet, but you don't mind at all, giving just as much back as he gives you, meeting his tongue for every stroke.

Without warning Chan stands up, bringing you up with him and the piano bench clatters to the floor at his sudden movement. You let out a squeal and pull back from his mouth to say something, but Chan won't let you, chasing your mouth and capturing your lips once more. 

Chan's hands move to your hips and you yelp into his mouth when your ass and back touch something cold and smooth. Goosebumps erupt all over your body. Did he just put you down onto his beloved piano? You get no time to think about it when Chan's fingers hook underneath the fabric of your thong and rip it from your body like he's the hulk.

You want to giggle, but once again Chan gives you no time to respond, licking into your mouth as his hands are everywhere. On your thighs, your hips, your breasts. He explores every inch of your skin with his big warm hands until you're a quivering mess and he hasn't even touched you where you most want it yet. 

'Chan,' you moan when he lets go of your lips to attach his mouth to your neck. 'Chan, please.'

Chan just hums and leaves a trial of open mouthed kisses from your neck to your breasts. He trials his tongue around your right nipple and you arch your back, wanting more, needing more. 

'Chan,' you whine, your fingers digging into the skin of his shoulders. 'Please, more.' 

You know you probably deserve his teasing after what you just did to him, but you also know that he loves it when you beg for him. 

'Tell me what you want baby,' Chan says against your skin, his breath tickling against the wet spot he left behind. 

Everything. You want it all, anything that he can give you. 

'I need your words baby,' Chan urges, scraping his teeth over your sensitive nipple. 

‘I- anything, please, just-’ you breathe out, tangling your fingers in the black strands of his hair. ‘I want- I need-, fuck.’

Chan chuckles and moves his mouth up to your neck again, licking and nibbling as he goes. 'I'm definitely planning on fucking you, don't worry.' 

You groan and pull on his hair, lifting his head up from your neck so you can look at him. It takes everything inside of you to take a deep breath and lift the lusty haze from your brain long enough to tell him exactly what you want. 

'I want you to touch me, I want your fingers inside of me and I want you to fuck me against your precious piano,' you say, your breath quickening with each word until you're nearly panting. 

Chan bites his lip and lets his eyes wander over every inch of your naked body. 

'You're so goddamn beautiful,' he whispers. 'How did I get so lucky?' 

You let out a whine and reach out for him. 'If you don't hurry up, I'm not sure how lucky you-' 

Chan doesn't let you finish. His soft lips are on yours once more and you sigh in relief, arching into him as he kisses you. His hands wander from your breasts, to your sides and finally to your legs. He pries your thighs open further and your heart rate spikes in anticipation, but then he pulls back again. 

‘Noooo,’ you whine. 

Chan chuckles and you instantly know it’s payback.

‘Look at you all wet and shiny, just for me,’ he says, slowly inching his fingers closer to your cunt. 

When his finger finally slides through your wet folds you moan in relief at the feeling. Chan chuckles again and moves forward to kiss your neck, his tongue slipping out to leave a wet stripe on your collarbone while he collects your juices with his fingers, moving up and down in a deliciously slow rhythm. 

‘More,’ you beg him. ‘Please.’ 

Your body jolts when he finds your clit, bumping it with his knuckle before repeating the same movement as before. He does it again and again until you’re a quivering mess, moaning his name and clawing at his back. 

‘More, Chan, please,’ you moan, grabbing onto his arm with one hand to try and move his hand. ‘I need you.’

Chan shushes you and slips his finger inside at the same time as he kisses you again, licking into your mouth. You gasp and your fingers fly to his hair again to steady yourself. He picks up the rhythm, flicking his thumb against your clit every time he plunges his finger inside.

Your body feels hot all over and your vision gets blurry when Chan crooks his finger in just the right way. 

‘Come for me, baby,’ Chan whispers against your breast before latching onto your nipple. 

And you do. Blackness fills your vision for a moment as your body goes taut before relaxing. 

‘Fuck,’ you whisper, feeling slightly drunk on pleasure. 

‘So beautiful,’ Chan grunts, moving you a little on the piano to get better access to you before plunging into you with one hard thrust, no warning whatsoever.

You let out a strangled moan, still sensitive from your orgasm and your eyes roll back into your head as your body tingles with pleasure. You wrap your legs around Chan’s waist for a better angle and the both of you groan when his long length pounds even deeper. 

‘Fuck, you feel so good Y/N,’ Chan pants, his hands on your hips to keep you steady. ‘So wet, so tight, so perfect for me.’ 

You capture his lips in a bruising kiss. It’s messy and wet, but it makes you feel even closer to him. Pleasure builds in your core deliciously and you pull back from his mouth.

‘I-I’m close,’ you moan, throwing your head back and giving Chan access to your neck instead.

His lips latch onto your pulse point immediately, sucking and nibbling at the skin. 

‘Me too, baby girl. Let it go.’

He pumps into you even harder, the piano creeks dangerously below your body but you give it no mind. He could break the damned thing as long as he wouldn’t stop fucking into you. 

‘Aaarghh,’ you cry out as overwhelming pleasure electrocutes your body. Your legs shake violently as Chan thrust into you once, twice more before coming deep inside you with a loud sexy as hell grunt.

You hold Chan close as you both come down from your high. Your fingers lazily trail his muscles as your eyes grow heavy. You always get sleepy after an orgasmn, and there's nothing you want more now than to curl up in bed under a pile of blankets and cuddle till you fall asleep.

'Carry me to bed?' you ask Chan, kissing his shoulder.

Chan slowly moves, still burried inside you. He presses his lips against your nose, your brow and then your lips, a little ritual he always does after the two of you have sex.

'Anything for you, love.'

*************

a/n: uhhh this was my first time writing y/n and m/f smut so i hope it's any good haha. please let me know your thoughts and be kind <3

taglist: @jaeminie-cricket

[sweatervest-obsessed]

Last, Last Time

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader (she/her pronouns)

WC: ~7.3k

TW: Angst, guns, violence, mentions of domestic violence, blood, swearing, depression, kidnapping, manipulation, self-deprecating thoughts, heartbreak, arguing, the grieving process, drinking, screaming, crying, sobbing, throwing up, being under pressure, and anything else that comes with a criminal minds episode.

a/n: based on S15 E6 - first date. I love u aubrey plaza <3. Also inspired by the song Last, Last Time by Boys Go To Jupitar. writing this was a little bit of a catharsis since it's one of the first things I've been able to write. I'm sorry I've been so m.i.a., i just moved to a new country and that has been a crazy experience. But to cope with that, enjoy some gut-wrenching angst!

Alternate Ending! Spencer Masterlist

“Spencer I won’t—I can’t keep doing this. I’m sick of arguing in circles.” 

“Y/n…”

“I-I feel like you take me for fucking granted Spencer. All I do is work and then come home and wait for you to actually be able to, I don’t know, sleep in the same bed as me for more than four hours.”

The look in his eyes almost took you out but your heart had already been broken long, long before this argument. If anything, you were starting to feel this sense of freedom as you broke his heart. 

“Please. Y/n. Just–I don’t—Just give me a few days to convince Hotch to let me have some time off and we can work on this please.” 

“Wait for the potential of us?” 

Spencer’s jaw loosened. You couldn’t read beyond the initial layer of pain and confusion, which made your chest ache since not too long ago you could have been able to find everything you needed in his expression.

“God Spencer this can’t be fucking news to you. We’ve been drifting apart for months now.” 

“I know, I know. You have been so patient with me and I’ve just been….there was that whole thing with Cat and then….I-I was trying so hard y/n…”

“No, first there was that whole thing with Maeve.”

“That’s not fair—”

“Oh that’s not fair? Really? You’re going to tell me the entire Maeve thing isn’t fair to you?”

“I’m sorry.”

You sighed and closed your eyes. “I’m not saying you weren’t trying but come one Spencer. There’s no need to deny this shit anymore. I hate it when you lie to me about these kinds of things.” 

Spencer’s hand came up to his face and it dragged down, aging him significantly with the fatigue written all over his face. 

“So you’re just going to pack up everything, break my heart, and leave? Were you even going to say goodbye, or was I going to come home to an empty home. A note or....” 

“I-I don’t know Spencer. I just don’t…” 

The tears were starting to creep in, and you had to place the box down before you lost it.

“This isn’t easy for me either…” Your chest heaved. 

The both of you stood in silence, tension simmering surrounding the both of you like heat on a summer’s eve. Neither of you could really look at one another, but it felt wrong to look at anything else. Something was missing but you couldn’t say it outloud. You knew you would always love Spencer Reid but this time it was not enough. 

“I’m tired of arguing Spencer.” 

Your eyes met his. You felt Spencer’s arms around you before you could even feel the tears hit your cheeks. Your arms immediately went to his neck, so familiar. No longer home. 

Spencer’s voice muttered into your ear. “Don’t cry Jolie. It’ll be okay..” 

About three years ago, Spencer had decided that he didn’t like that you had nicknames for him, and he had none for you. He spent weeks workshopping different ones : Sugar, Honey, Pumpkin, Sweetheart, Darlin, Pookie, Lover, Sunny (like sunshine), Sunshine—it was a wild few weeks trying to figure out who he was talking to. Then one day, offhandedly, he was trying to tell you about this french film he had been watching, and trying to get Emily to watch with him. 

He called you ‘tres jolie’, and blushing you had asked him what it meant. He told you it meant pretty. 

And it stuck. 

Now? It stung. 

All you could do was squeeze tightly onto him, not ready to let go.

“You’re so pretty when you’re lying through your teeth.” You whispered after a few moments, pulling away out of his arms. 

“I.” You swallow and step back, out of his reach. “Maybe I’ll...” 

Spencer just looked up at the ceiling, trying to hold in the tears that were streaming down his face. 

You grabbed the last box on the counter and your keys, and walked out, for the last time. 

You awoke in your bed, eyes adjusting to the complete darkness the blackout curtains provided you. 

Another fucking night thinking about your decision those four years ago, and how your life may have gotten better because of it. 

Moving to get up from the bed, you decided to leave the curtains closed for now, feeling as if you could melt from the sun touching you. 

You turned on the bathroom light and started your morning routine. Wash face. Take meds. Brush teeth. Fix hair—

Somewhere in that process, you got lost, and just stared at yourself in the mirror. You weren’t sure for how long. All you could do was replay the last four years. 

Did you make the right choice? You were happy, you had your dream job. 

Maybe it was true what they say, you can only have a career or love, but not both—

The only thing taking you out of this spiral was the ringer on your phone going off. 

This caused some hesitation because your phone’s ringer was always off––the loud noise startling you. There were only a few people who had that emergency bypass, and none of them had called you in four years. 

You peaked out of the bathroom and saw the name light up on your phone. 

Emily Prentiss

______________________________________________________________

The door to the round room opened up and in walked Spencer Reid. “Catch me up.” 

Prentiss clicked the remote, and the TV lit up with a picture of a woman smirking facing the camera while holding a gun up to another one next to her. “Early this morning, Garcia got an email from an anonymous server.”

The second woman was tied up, mouth slightly open, and eyes filled with tears, while a man on the other side just had his eyes closed, tired. . 

Spencer just stared at the photo. 

Rossi nodded at the picture. “She's not obscuring her face, telling us she's got nothing to hide.”

He never pulled focus away from the screen, mouth dry at the thought of what today was going to be. “Any ideas on the unsub?”

“No.” Prentiss sighed. “Only the unsub's demand. That we release Catherine Adams in 24 hours.  I'm having her transferred here for questioning, but we have no illusions. This is just a game to her. We know that. The question is, do we want to play it or not?”

______________________________________________________________

Receiving a call from the FBI was not entirely new to you, since you had been engaged to one of their agents, but receiving one now? Weird. Off brand. Something was deeply wrong from them to have to give you a call. 

You hesitantly pick up the phone. “Hello?”

“Hey Y/n, it’s Emily Prentiss—“

“I know who you are, Emily. It’s been a couple years, not millions.” 

Emily hummed a brief laugh, and you could hear other voices behind her, unable to make out anything. 

“I know this is hard to ask of you, but would you stay on the phone with me and come in?” 

“What?” 

“I need you to stay very calm Y/n, but I need you to stay on the line with me, leave your apartment as soon as you can, and get to the BAU.” 

“Oh my god I totally forgot. It might take me an hour to get there with all this bullshit traffic, could we push the reservation an hour? Would they be willing to do that?” 

Your entire tone changed, having remembered what Spencer had told you all those years ago about if people were listening into your apartment, if they bugged your car—all paranoia that didn’t pay off then, might be paying off now. 

You were sure you could hear Emily sigh, and it sounded a little upset at the fact that you knew what to do–you knew how to handle a dangerous situation, which made her question everything in her life. 

Quickly you pulled on a pair of jeans and threw a sweatshirt over your pajama top and grabbed your keys off of the counter. 

You left your apartment, waved to one of your neighbors, and hopped into your car, still on the line, just trying not to panic. Maybe something went wrong, maybe Spencer wasn’t okay, maybe he had died—you refused to even acknowledge that thought and decided it was something else entirely. 

It was a very tense hour of driving, that was only about forty minutes since you knew how to drive above the speed limit. 

You realized that it was past midday, and you had taken full advantage of the weekend. So at least you had a decent amount of sleep under your belt for what felt like the beginning of an extraneous night. 

As you pulled into the parking garage, Emily Prentiss and someone you had never met before were standing there waiting for you. You placed your car in park, hopped out and walked up to them–only hanging up as soon as you were out of the car. 

Both of them had such grim looks on their faces, but at least they were trying to pretend like the situation wasn’t as bad as it appeared to your face. 

Emily engulfed you in a hug. “Missed you Y/n. It’s been too long.” 

“Well Em, next time I end an engagement with someone I’ll consider your feelings first.” You squeezed him back, dryly laughing at your own joke. At least it caused Emily to snort. 

“Y/n this is SSA Luke Alvez. Luke, this is Y/n Y/l/n.”

“It’s nice to meet you.” He gave a small smile and nodded at you.

“I wish it were under different circumstances.” You nodded back and looked over at Emily.

“Let’s head inside?” 

The three of you moved inside. 

Sure, you hadn’t been here in a while, but you knew your way around the BAU Bullpen if your life depended on it, which was ironic since that was what this feels like. 

As soon as you were safely in their round table room, Luke shut the door, and stood by it, Emily coming and sitting down next to you. 

“What do you know about Cat Adams?” 

That bitch. 

______________________________________________________________

“I would like to go on a date. With you.” 

Spencer stared at her, face stoic as ever. “A date?”

“Yes. I want to look pretty. And I want to have fun.” She looked him up and down. “And I won't even get physical, ok? Unless you want me to.”

Spencer sat down across from her. “Come here. Closer.”

Cat leaned in, a small smile on her face, absolutely intoxicated by being so close to him.

“The only date that I'll be there for is the one where they stick a needle in your vein.”

Cat scoffed. “You're just going to let her father and sister die? I don't think so.”

“I never said it was a father and daughter. You're already slipping.” He stood up from the table. “We'll find them. We always do.”

Cat leaned back and crossed her arms. “Not tonight. Tonight I win.”

His resolution had yet to change, “The score between me and you is two to zero. By tomorrow morning, it'll be a clean sweep. Enjoy eternal nothingness. It's a metaphor for your life.” 

And with that, the door slammed shut behind him.

______________________________________________________________

Both the profilers watched a series of emotions run rampant across your face, before you settled on a somewhat displeased smile. “A lot.” 

They exchanged a look, and you didn’t have the energy to pretend like you didn’t know what it was. 

“Don’t start with me you two. I know profiling. I know what you’re doing. Ask me the questions you want to ask. Don’t try and trick me into giving the answers you want.” 

Alvez bit his tongue and looked away, trying to hide a small smile that appeared on his lips. 

Emily, on the other hand, hid her smile a bit better than him, but part of being previously engaged to a profiler meant you picked up on some of their tricks too. 

She nodded and pulled a file from across the table. “I’m assuming you know the basics since she, uh, is obsessed with Spencer.”

“Glad to see he still has that going for him.” You muttered and looked into the file. 

Emily shot Luke a look when he let out a huff or air, trying his damndest not to laugh. 

“What is the last thing you know about her?” 

You recounted the days leading up to the restaurant, and then the few days after, decidedly stopping short of the engagement breaking off a week later. 

They shared another look, and you didn’t enjoy whatever it was that had moved across their faces. 

“What? What happened?” 

“Y/n..”

“No Emily, I drove from DC to here, I deserve to know what happened. without some weird sugarcoating, alright?” 

Emily then begins to explain to you the past four years of Reid’s life. Cat pretending she was pregnant with his kid in prison, kidnapping his mother, framing him for murder in Mexico, going to prison—

“Spencer went to prison and none of you thought to call me….”

“We didn’t think you’d–” 

“I’m a fucking criminal defense attorney in DC Emily. Of course I’d want to know if he was arrested, especially internationally. I know that law better than all of you. If someone I knew was kidnapped, I’d call you immediately. Faster than the cops.” 

Both of them went silent. 

“So is he out?” 

They nodded slowly, silently. 

“How long was he in there.”

Nothing. 

“I asked. How. Long.”

Luke spoke up. “Three months.” 

“Jesus christ.” You stood up and started to pace around the room, taking the time you needed to calm down. 

Why didn’t Spencer call you—well you knew why Spencer wouldn’t call you. 

“Okay so he’s out.” You said finally. “Why am I here?” 

“Cat’s execution is coming up, and we….we found out that she’s convinced someone to kidnap some….people…close to Reid, and we knew you’d be on that list for him.” 

Your eyebrows went up at people but said nothing of it. Just as you went to say something else, JJ knocked on the door, another blonde woman behind her. 

They entered and JJ gave you a small, yet genuine smile. 

You returned it, but quickly shifted your gaze onto the woman behind. 

Your whole body shifted slightly, into a place of defense, locking your emotions down. You knew all the profilers were watching it happen in real time, which is why Emily walked over and stood next to you, a hand appearing on the small of your back as a comfort.

“Would someone like to tell me what is going on here?” The blonde woman spoke up, arms crossed.

At least Spencer’s taste in partners with attitude hadn’t changed. 

______________________________________________________________

“Victimology is off.”

“How so?” Prentiss looked up at him as he walked into the room. 

“Father and daughter. She’s never done that before.” 

Lewis spoke up. “She usually kills men that remind her of her father. Children–even adult children, are off limits. Do we have an ID yet.” 

Prentiss, Rossi, Garcia, and JJ all looked over at Reid, and he just pulled a hand down his face. “It’s. It’s Issac and Noelle Y/l/n.” 

“Y/l/n…as is Y/n Y/l/n.” Tara looked up surprised at Spencer. 

Reid nodded slowly, just staring at the picture on the projector.

While Luke spoke up. “Who is Y/n Y/l/n.” 

“An old friend.” Rossi quickly interjected, before any more explanation had to be said. It was clear both Alvez and Simmons, that whoever this was, was an extremely touchy subject for Reid. 

Tara, who had only known you for a little while, looked back at the picture. 

Rossie spoke up. “What do we know about the partner who’s helping her?” 

“It’s got to be someone from her prison.” Simmons spoke up. “She hasn’t had contact with anyone else.” 

______________________________________________________________

After all of that, you found yourself back in a place you left four years ago. It looked almost the same as when you had first moved in, but there was less of it. 

Almost as if he was having trouble covering places where things used to be.

There were almost no photos on the walls, since you had taken half of them, and were in the rest. 

Calling someone you once loved a stranger feels wrong. 

Max, as you had learned her name, was just sitting on the couch in your spot . She was looking around as you and Rossi stood by the kitchen counter. 

“Cat had a cellmate named Juliette Weaver. We believe the two were working together, as a way for Cat to get something against Spencer, and as payment, Cat would get Juliette’s ex.”

You nodded. “How does this affect me?” 

“She took your father and sister.” 

Your back straightened and immediately brought out your phone, to call your sister, but Rossi just grabbed your wrist (gently) and shook his head. “If she finds out you know, then it’s all over. She’s doing this on purpose. She knows about you and Reid, but she knows that dragging you into all of this will hurt him more than anything else.” 

His voice had gone low and quiet, so that the girl on the couch couldn’t hear. 

“So why is she here?” You whispered back. 

“Because we don’t want anyone in danger.” 

You closed your eyes and nodded. “I need a cup of tea.” 

Rossi let go of your wrist, and you walked into the kitchen, mostly eyes closed from the stress of the situation. 

The apartment was silent, the others watching as you grabbed a kettle, and started to make tea. It was like second nature to you as you turned the stovetop on, grabbed a mug from the cabinet (careful to not grab one of his favorites), and grabbed some tea from the cabinet. 

It didn’t dawn on you that you were drinking your favorite type of tea until the second sip, while the entire apartment was still silent. 

The pity from Rossi's look was palpable. 

“Don’t even start.” 

He shrugged and stayed silent. 

Until his walkie went off and he looked at Max. “It’s time. Let’s go.” 

Rossi looked back at you and gave you a quick hug, squeezing you tightly. “You’ve got this kid. Remember everything we talked about.” 

You nodded and gave them both a strained smile as they left the apartment, leaving you all alone in this place you once called home, alone. 

Never once, since you left, did you think you would ever be back here. You didn’t even realize you were drinking from one of your own mugs until it was just you. The irony of it was not lost on you, and you sat down in your spot on the couch. 

Well first you sat in Spencer’s seat but it felt too weird, so you shifted back into your spot on the couch. 

______________________________________________________________

“Juliette staked out in Reid’s life. Found out he was dating someone, but then must have discovered his ex-fiancée.” Simmons sighed. “He was probably so focused on Max, he didn’t even realize that someone was digging into his history, following them around.”

Prentiss nodded as they walked and talked. “But if Juliette was able to find Max, that meant she was easily able to find Y/n and her family. It means she must have access to all of her publicly available information. “

“Well at least we found their hidden agenda.” 

“No. We found Cat’s hidden agenda. Juliette doesn’t care about Reid. There’s something we’re missing here. Do a deep dive with Garcia.” 

Simmons nodded at Prentis. “On it.” 

“I’ll go to Reid's apartment and monitor onsite. Is there a trap and trace on his landline?” 

“Garcia’s almost set up.” Simmons walked away from Prentiss, and down towards Penelope’s office. 

“Well this went from bad to worse.” Tara walked up to Emily. 

Emily sighed in agreement. 

Lewis spoke up. “Female narcissists destroy their competition.Y/n  really shouldn’t be in there.” 

Emily just nodded and the two of them headed out of the bullpen. “Walk with me.” 

Tara kept stride with her as they pushed through the doors. Rossi was just getting off the phone with someone and turned to look at the two women approaching him and JJ. 

JJ spoke up when Rossi was finished. “So, the hospital just released the dad– Issac Y/l/n. He's on his way here now.

Rossi scoffed. “Question is, why let him go at all?”

“Matt's on that.” Emily gestures in the direction of Garcia’s office. “Juliette Weaver's real agenda should tell us where she's taking Y/n’s younger sister.”

Lewis spoke next. “I still think the play here is to get Cat and Juliette to contact each other, but I have no idea how.”

Prentiss crossed her arms. “I have a plan, but first we have to talk about Y/n.” 

______________________________________________________________

Just then, you heard the click of the door, and stood up, watching as the door swung open. 

And there he was. 

This was the first time you had seen Spencer in four years. 

And here he was, kissing Catherine Adams. 

The woman you could give partial credit to for ending your relationship. 

After a moment Spencer looked up, and took several steps away from Cat. His eyes were wide and locked on yours. 

It took a lot of self-restraint to not punch the lights out of Cat, and to stand still arms crossed. 

“Y/n?” Spencer’s voice broke a little bit. 

You never would say that Spencer was unattractive. In fact, it would be a lie if you ever said it. But something about the past four years aged him like a fine wine. 

His hair was a bit longer, he had some scruff—his baby face had melted away and standing in front of you was a man who thought you knew everything about, but was now a stranger. 

You didn’t answer him, watching as he took you in, standing in his apartment, for the first time since…

“What are you doing here?” 

You looked over at Cat, who had the most devious smirk on her face. 

Remember what Prentiss had said to you. 

“You know why I’m here.” 

Cat nodded and the two of them moved into the apartment, the door closing behind them. 

Spencer just stood ten feet away from you, eyes never leaving you, and you watched him right back. 

Cat, on the other hand, was walking around, examining the apartment. You could see her take notice of the tea you had made yourself on the counter. You could see the hatred from the corner of your eyes. The two of you were starting to piss her off. 

She spoke up, after a few moments of silence. “Did it make you mad that I was kissing your Fiancé?” 

You shook your head. “No.”

Your focus had fully turned to Cat, but you swore you swore you could hear Spencer take a sharp inhale as you spoke your next words.

“Well, he's not my fiancé and I kind of have some other things on my mind.”

Cat didn’t scare you, but there was just something so off-putting about her. “Like what?” 

“Are you gonna hurt Noelle?”

Cat shrugged. “Not if I don't have to, no. Honestly, if she follows instructions, she might even learn from this whole experience.”

You scoffed. “What does that mean?”

Cat just started fiddling with the chess set on the dresser. 

“Spencer, what does she mean?” You turned to look back at him, his name feeling so good on your tongue. 

Spencer, who really hadn’t stopped looking at you and sighed. “I think…She means that Noelle isn’t learning from her, but from Juliette.” 

You sat down in your spot on the couch, arms crossed. You were on the full defense. 

Spencer noticed where you sat and had to look down to conceal any notions of a smile on his face. 

Cat watched him before turning and looking at you, some more disdain on her face than before. 

“Normally, Spencie and I, we spend our time together playing games, but tonight, I've brought you all here to make a point. You are doing so much better.” 

Spencer spoke up. “With you?”

“I'm not talking to you.” Cat snapped at him before she turned to you. “I'm talking to you. Because, girlfriend, you need to know the truth about your fiancé.” 

“He's not my finacé.” You were unsure about how many more times you could say that outloud. 

“No kidding. When’s the last time you spoke? Right…” Cat walked over to the center of the room, right in front of the couch. “Here?” 

Your head whipped around to Spencer. “You told her about that?”

Spencer was pleading with his eyes. “I had to say a lot of things tonight.”

Cat’s voice caused your head to snap back to her. “Yes, he has. He said that you never compared to me, that, um... That no matter what, he will never get me out of his mind, unlike you. Unlike that girlfriend.” 

You tried not to wince at the mention of that girl Maxine out in one of the trucks.

Spencer sat down next to you. “Everything I said—I was lying to save your family.”

Cat scoffed. “Did our kiss look like a lie?” 

“No.” you just looked down at your hands. 

“Thank you. See, now we're getting to the heart of the matter.” Cat started mocking Spencer. “You see, everyone thinks that Dr. Spencer Reid is... Is just this nice, bookish, uh, genius who, uh, always saves the day and has all the answers. And has zero mommy issues, right? But, um... I know the real him.” 

“Oh, yeah? Who's the real me, Cat?” 

“The real Spencer Reid throws women against walls. And hisses that he's going to kill them.” 

Spencer stood up, squaring off against her.  “That was a very different situation.”

“No, it wasn't.” Cat was holding the smirk back this time, making your gut wretch. 

“Spencer…What is she talking about?” You looked from the psychopath in front of you, to the man you realized you might have never really known beside you.

“You tell her. She's not gonna believe it coming from me.” She huffed. 

Reid turned and looked at you. “Two years ago, Cat had her partner kidnap my mother. Just like tonight. She got under my skin and…”

Your chest hurts. “And you threw her against a wall?” 

Cat’s smirk was breaking through whatever resolve she had. “Don't skimp on the details, Spencie. She deserves to know everything.”

Every single time she said Spencie you swore a shock went up your spine. 

Spencer looked down at his hands, and then over at you. His voice had gotten quieter. “She was pregnant at the time and I knew that when I hurt her.” 

“And?” She stood there expectantly, waiting for Spencer to finish. When he didn’t, her face suddenly became solemn. “The next day... I miscarried. The end.”

Spencer looked at her. “That's not true.” 

“It is most certainly true. Check my medical records.” 

“That doesn't mean I-I would…”

Cat held up her hand to him. “Stop. Look.”

Spencer looked over at you, just sitting on the couch, trying to process everything that was going through your head. 

After thinking about everything you had gone through, especially with Spencer. “I thought you were better than that Spence.” 

It was the first time you had used a nickname for him in years. And he was hearing it for the first time while you were stuck in a standoff between himself and Cat Adams, your sister being god knows where. 

Spencer’s voice cracked. “I'm sorry.” 

Cat squatted down in front of you, a sick smile on her lips. She was enjoying this. She truly enjoyed watching his life crumble to bits. “Notice how your Spencie is apologizing to you and not me.”

You clenched your hands. “He’s not mine…”

Spencer just looked over at you. 

Cat nodded. “That's good. Because men are all the same. Aren't they, Jolie?” 

Spencer’s eyes lit up with an emotion you rarely saw from him when you were together. “Don't call her that.”

And you couldn’t blame him. The word ran you through like a spear and you were sure if you looked behind you, the blade would be through the couch. You tried so hard to not let either of the two people near you see how much it messed with you. Luckily for you, Cat was too busy pushing Spencer’s buttons to see the way her words won against you. 

Cat hissed at him. “What, are you gonna throw me against a wall and choke me, or do you only do that to pregnant women?” 

You finally spoke up. “Why are you doing this?”

“Because I want you to see it.” She gestured to Spencer. “I want you to see that he is...no better than he was before, or any man after. They’re all the same.” 

“Stop.”

Cat squatted down in front of you. “I can see it on your face. What's his name?” 

You stared back at her. “It's none of your business.”

That damned smirk of hers returned. “It is exactly my business. In fact, it's my specialty. I mean, I could have Juliette and baby sister go over there if you want. They could take care of him.” 

Reid looked over at you. “Say yes. Give her what she wants.” 

“Hmm. See, he wants you to get me to make a little phone call so they can trace it.” She moved away from you both and sat down in the lounging chair across from you. “They're so good, the FBI.”

You jumped up and started pacing, a spitting image of four years ago. “What is wrong with the two of you? What is this sick, twisted thing that you have? Listen, I just want to save my sister. Will you please just tell me what I have to do to do that?” 

“Tell me his name. Tell me the story. That's it. And then if they can let Juliette exit stage right, then I promise you I will let her go.”

You looked between Cat and Spencer before walking over to the kitchen, and hanging up the phone. After staring down at the decision you had just made, you walked back over and took your phone out. “Here.  Use this. Use my phone. They can't trace it.”

She just watched you. “You'd be surprised.”

“I don't even need a call. Just... just a photo.” You held the phone out to her. “Something to prove to me that she's still alive. Please”. 

Cat just looked up at your face. “Story first.”

“Y/n. Please.” Spencer turned to you, hoping you’d look back at him. “I have been here with her before. She called the number and told the partner to kill my mom.”

“It is so tricky, isn't it? I mean, who are you gonna trust? The lying, cheating, violent psychopath... Or me?”

You looked down at the ground, refusing to look over at Spencer. “His…His name was Mike Davis. We dated for two years. I met him a month after we…we split.”

Cat’s attention on you felt as if there were a million bees stinging your body all at different intervals, pain coursing through your body. “Good. When did it end?” 

“Last year.” 

“Was he good in bed?” 

Spencer stood up. “Shut up.” 

Cat was enjoying this. She was enjoying watching you make Spencer uncomfortable. She was enjoying hurting him in every masochistic way she could. “What? You have to know where you stand.”

“He was good…” You looked back at Cat. “Good at, um, separating me from my friends and my family. Enough that the first time he punched me in the face, I didn't have anywhere to go. And my first response wasn't "get out." It wasn't "go to hell." It was "I'm sorry, Mike." That's when he knew he had me.”

There was a glint in Spencer’s eyes, and you could swear they were tears, but you couldn’t tell from rage or sorrow. 

Cat continued to probe. “How many hospital visits were there?” 

You showed her a small scar on the inside of your elbow. “None. No, he... He knew how to hurt me just enough to hide it all, I guess.”  

“But you found the strength to leave. What did you do?” 

“ I planned and I... I waited.”

Cat’s eyes lit up. “Waited for what? “

“I live here in D.C.” You looked between Spencer and Cat. “but I'm also a resident in Virginia. It takes 60 days for the permit to clear.”

Spencer’s eyes widened. “Y/n, stop talking. Stop talking right now.”

Cat shushed him. “No, don't stop. Here. Give me the phone. Look, I'm gonna enter the text. Stick the landing and I'll hit "send."

You handed her the phone and she quickly typed out a message, her thumb hovering over send. 

Fiddling with your ring finger, you started to speak again. Slowly. Concisely. “When I was ready, I picked a fight. Loud enough for the neighbors to hear. And he came at me with his fist just cocked back, so I pulled my Glock 19 out of my purse. I shot him.”

Spencer tried to interject. “It was self-defense. He was attacking you—”

“That's what I told 911 as he was struggling to breathe on his kitchen floor. That's why the police never charged me. I’m a lawyer, I know how to plead.” You closed your eyes. “But I... after I hung up, I... I shot him two more times.” 

Cat was glowing, spinning around to face Spencer. “Wow, you really have a type, don't you? Quite a dilemma, too. She just admitted to murder.” 

Spencer was in disbelief. “She'll beat it.” . 

“Probably. But whatever feelings she might have still had for you, and whatever Maxine might have seen in you—-it’s all gone.” 

The phone in your hand buzzed.

“Oh, wow. Look at that. Your sister. Alive and well. You're welcome.” 

Your face hardened up, and you stood up straighter. Walking away from the two of them, you opened the door. “I got it.” 

She took the phone from your hand and you turned back to the two of them. There was no emotion behind your eyes as you looked back at Spencer. 

Cat smirked and looked up at Spencer. “I win.” 

______________________________________________________________

The prison transport was quiet, with the two guards sitting across from Spencer and Cat. It had been silent for about twenty minutes, but then, Cat spoke up. 

“Do you know why I did this? Why I really did this?” 

Spencer looked down at his hands. “You wanted to prove I'm a monster just like you.”

“No... Silly. I just wanted to see you again. I just wanted to make sure that you would never forget about me.” She sighed. “'Cause when they do put that needle in my arm, I just want there to be even the slightest chance that... Maybe you're still thinking about me…”

Spencer stiffened as she placed her head on his shoulder. “You didn't have to terrorize 3 innocent people. You could've just written a letter.” 

“Would you have written me back?” 

When Spencer didn’t respond, Cat knew her answer. 

“Bye, Spencie. I really enjoyed our date.” She smiled at him desperately, getting dragged out of the vehicle by the guards to the prison. 

______________________________________________________________

The elevator door opened and Spencer walked out of it, his whole body reeked of defeat, and he barely looked at Emily as she spoke.  “We need to debrief.” 

Spencer just walked right past her, and into the bullpen. His expression changed when he saw you on one side talking to Tara, and Max on the other, looking up at him right as he walked in. 

“Spencer, are you okay?” 

Her voice caught your ear, and immediately you looked up to see her walk over and embrace him in a hug. 

He smiled at her, and grateful returned the hug before muttering that he would be back, and explain everything.

You were never going to get back together with Spencer, but watching it in real time was like unlacing an old wound. 

Spencer walked over to you, and you stood up as he approached. 

“Uh, Tara, would you mind giving us…”

She nodded at him and walked away. 

Both of you went to speak, trying to say something to the other. 

“I should explain all of this.” 

Spencer shook his head. “You don’t have to explain any of that Y/n—it doesn’t.” 

You cut him off. “It was fake—most of it. I didn’t kill anyone, Spence. I was just lying to her to get her to send the text from my phone. It was all…It was made up.” 

He just nodded, staring at you really. 

You gave him a soft smile, and gently placed a hand on his shoulder. Both of you could feel the pulse between it, making you remove your hand and take a small step back. 

“Thank you for saving my sister and father.” 

Spencer watched your resolve fully formed, masking whatever you were feeling. He hated watching it happen to him, watching as you placed whatever feelings you had back into somewhere he couldn’t find. 

Garcia walked over and placed a hand on Spencer’s shoulder. “I just need you both to know, Cat Adams had a miscarriage, but it was months after whatever encounter you had. It’s not your fault. We looked at her records.” She was speaking low for you both, yet both of you let out a quiet sigh of relief. 

“They filled me in on everything that happened between both of you in the past couple years, and they asked me if I would be willing to…help them beat her.” 

Spencer looked up at you, and unlike yourself, every single emotion Spencer was feeling was racing across his face. 

He didn’t like that you knew about everything that had gone down. He was so happy you were okay. He was a little impressed by the way you beat Cat at her own game. He was upset that you put yourself in danger. 

“They gave me an ear piece and everything.” 

Spencer shook his head. “You’re not trained—that’s extremely dangerous of you.” 

You sighed and nodded. “Unfortunately Spencer, this is…this was the life I was used to when we were together. I knew the stakes. I mean the briefings I had with Hotch after you relapsed…” 

Spencer just clammed up and stood a bit straighter. “ I never knew..”

“It was like that on purpose. I didn’t want you to think that you were a burden or too much or—I was doing it for the potential of…” You cut yourself of, flinching at the parallels between this and your previous final conversation. 

You looked over at Garcia. “I need my bag Pen.” You whispered, taking a step away from Spencer. “I shouldn’t…I finished my job. My family is safe…” 

She had a rueful look on her face, but she nodded and took your arm, walking you back over to the desk where your stuff was. 

He looked up at Emily and walked over to her. “I’m…uh. I’m gonna go walk her out and then I’ll be right back.” 

Emily gave him the saddest smile, and just nodded. She knew that nothing she could say could make it any better. 

You grabbed your coat, and your bag, and the two of you walked to the elevator in silence, riding it all the way down to the parking garage, where your car was still there from this afternoon, all of those hours ago. 

You looked over at Spencer, tears in your eyes, having not said anything to him. 

As soon as he met your eyes, you dropped your bag, and Spencer wrapped his arms around you tightly, just holding you and resting his head on yours; trying to give you the comfort that he was rarely able to give you. 

Sobbing into his arms, you just tightly wrapped your arms around his torso and just held onto him tightly. Trying to decompress, trying to truly understand everything that had happened in the past twelve hours. 

It was Spencer who spoke first. 

“I’m so so sorry Y/n.” He whispered. “I never meant any of this to happen to you, and for you to get dragged back here and—” 

You shook your head slightly, but didn’t move from where you were. Neither of you did. 

“It’s what she wanted, Spence, and unfortunately for us, this was always bound to happen.” You whispered. 

The hug felt so good, but something about it was just so different. 

It’s not the way it used to be. 

“I need to go Spencer.” 

He nodded, and this time you moved away from him. His hand came up and wiped away one of the remaining tears on your cheek. 

You closed your eyes, and took a deep breath. 

“Oh fuck, why is this so fucking hard four years later.” You laughed, trying to regain any sort of composure. 

“Y/n…”

You took another step away from him and shook your head. 

“We can’t—I’m not.” You tried so hard to find the right words without bursting into tears again. “Spencer. I cannot put myself back to where I was four years ago. I can’t do it. And yes things have changed, but maybe that is for the better. Maybe you were always meant to be my maybe, and not my always.” 

You took another breath, but kept going. “You are amazing, and funny, and so smart Spence. But this…we ran our course. It didn’t work then, and I don’t know if I have it in me to try again just for it to fail.” 

“Y/n please.” 

“I will always love you but this…It’s time to…It’s time to stop. I have to go back to my life, and you go back upstairs to yours, with Prentiss and Rossi and Penelope and…Max.” 

Both of you winced as you said her name, but you took a step forward, moving to kiss him on the cheek. 

Spencer gently grabbed you face, giving you enough time to back out. 

You didn’t. 

His lips locked with yours, his thumb rubbing against your cheek as the two of you shared one more moment, just for the two of you. 

But it had to end. 

You couldn’t go back to the anxiety, the arguing, the petty disagreements. It wasn’t good for you. It was good for either of you. 

Stepping away again, you gently kissed his cheek, and started to slowly walk to your car. 

Right as you got to your car, you turned around and made eye contact with him one last time before the elevator doors closed, both of you with the most gut wrenching smile slightly plastered across your faces. 

You mouthed goodbye, unable to speak it out loud, and he nodded, tears filling his eyes as he whispered it back to you. 

The doors shut. 

You were all alone in this hollow parking garage. 

Your heart was aching, burning. 

But there was a sigh of relief, that came with the doors closing, and saying goodbye for the last, last time. 

[thatdisasterauthor]

Okay, let's talk federal jobs for a minute here. Because if we are going to bring up things like the FAA being understaffed and how it may have effected what happened with the crash in DC, we need to have an accurate picture of what is going on.

It is not Trump's fault (yet) that the FAA is understaffed. Yeah, it has been a chaotic as fuck week to work in any sort of federal job, yeah a lot of new hiring has been screwed up and a lot of scary things have been hurled at current federal workers. But we haven't actually seen the results of that yet. It JUST started.

Federal positions have been understaffed, in the FAA and otherwise, for AWHILE. There are tons of reasons behind those issues, but a big, big one is that getting hired to work ANY federal job takes fucking FOREVER and involves jumping through SO MANY hoops.

My basic, zero security clearance wildland forest dispatcher job with the forest service involved applying in October (with a 25 page resume that basically outlines everything I have ever done since I was born), a background check that took three days for me to fill out and involved contacting people I hadn't spoken to in YEARS (almost had to contact my mother who I am no contact with too), a drug test that I had to do at the drop of the hat ON THE DAY AFTER THE ELECTION, getting fingerprints done, and taking a two-hour road trip to a tiny little town because that was the only "local" place that had someone authorized to make my work ID for me (which involved ANOTHER set of fingerprints). Then I had to wait until January to know if I even might have gotten the job, and that was earlier than usual because they were scrambling to get people through the hiring system after the election. Then my actual start date isn't until MARCH.

So it will have been a nearly six month process for a BASIC job. And I'm lucky in that I don't have to move for the job because that would be a whole pile of nonsense. Other people spend a year or more going through the process of getting a federal job.

There's a lot of other reasons places are understaffed, but this stupidly long hiring process plays a big damn role. And it is only going to get longer as the various departments that handle hiring get gutted along with everything else.

[aamircoeur]

sweeeet ー vi, arcane.

wherein violet eagerly expresses just how much she loves sweets

WARNINGS 2nd pov, established toxic!relationship, female reader, titty-obsessed vi, jealous!reader, unedited

"and, and you even raised your eyebrow at her."

"here we fucking go again," violet scoffed.

"letting your hand linger when she handed you the stupid-ass glass," you recalled the moment that occurred earlier as if you had the image of it burned into your memory. "and you tell her, fuckin', "thanks, sweets"?" you mocked.

after a supposedly fun date night that the two of you had spontaneously planned, going home heated with one another surely wasn't part of it. your neck was craned to the side, piercing eyes staring deep into her baby blues, awaiting yet another one of her excuses.

violet rolled her eyes and kept them fixed on a random piece of furniture on her right side, seemingly too irritated to look back into your eyes. "you're overthinking it again, baby. i was just being nice to the girl. you're being jealous."

"oh, am i? i'm jealous? you rocked the shit out of a girl last week just because she winked at me, and i'm the jealous one?" you asked in disbelief, unsure how your situation even outweighs hers in her point of view.

violet furrowed her eyebrows as she grimaced at the memory. "she was flirting with ya, and you're defending her? you fuckin' stupid, baby?"

"how was she supposed to know that we were together, vi? you got us drinks, and it was an innocent approach!" you raised your voice as your arms moved as a demonstration of frustration towards your girlfriend.

"bullshit. wit' all the hickeys on your neck, she didn' know? stupid-ass. fuck, you were probably flirting with her too, dollface." violet took big steps to quickly close the gaps between the two of you. you tried your best to fight the intimidation, keeping your balled fists to your side.

"yeah, she probably was just a stupid-ass. but for sure your cupcake isn't one, huh?" you raised your eyebrows at her accusingly. "so smart, little kiramman. who the hell gave you the courage to put your arm around her while holding my hand? you'd probably fuck her while your fingers interlocked with mine when given the chance." you said sarcastically, jealousy over violet's ex girlfriend bubbling inside you.

violet sighed loudly and turned from you, taking a few steps away and kicking a chair in the process, a heavy clank echoing. "may janna give me the strength and patience i so necessarily need to deal with this woman," violet said, rubbing the sides of her face in deep frustration.

you stomped your feet and made your way towards the door out of your shared apartment. "didn't even fucking deny it. fucking enforcers," you said lowly as you made your way out.

"hey, waitー fuck, dollface! get back in here, 'm not done with your stubborn ass." she said, coming after you right before you fully stepped out of the place, pulling you back inside by the arm.

"no, no! we're done, get back with your kiramman, or whoever the hell you want your fingers in, violet, i don't care." you tried to pull away from her hold, your fingers attempting to get in between her grip on your arm in order to unclasp them, but it was no use with how intense violet's stare was to your now-heated face.

"we're not over until i say so, doll. is it your personal job to piss me off all the damn time?" she sneered, her teeth gritting at the harshly pronounced words.

"yeah, my job is just to piss you off again and again, and again," you pushed your body forward and pressed your chest against hers. violet's grip on your arm loosened as her hands found their way on your hips, bandaged fingers pushing against them harshly.

fighting the urge to squirm underneath her rough touch, you closed your eyes in order to avoid her unforgiving stare and balled your fists, holding your forearm against her chest to create distance between the two of you. "your fuckin' job?" violet echoed your words.

you whimpered as one of her hands slid down to your lower back until it found the curve of your ass, giving it a testing squeeze. "y-yeah, my job. mine alone." violet smirked at your words and pulled you closer, creating friction between your touched stomachs. your breaths gained volume as violet kept a steady and rough pace. "mine." you finished, as if she hasn't been yours since the beginning of time.

violet looked at you in amusement, her blues seeming to gain a spark in them. vi leaned down and placed open-mouth kisses to your left cheek, her eyes never leaving yours as if she was declaring who she belonged to. "is that so?" she murmured in between another kiss, followed by a heavy lick downwards to your exposed neck as you craned your head backwards.

you let out a shaky hum that nearly sounded so much like a whine, which violet certainly enjoyed. "tell me more about it, baby." said violet.

"iー ah," a swift bite to your right shoulder interrupted you, with violet's teeth retreating before it could leave a mark, as if testing the waters. your eyes met hers as she navigated her way through your upper chest and collarbones, familiar hands getting to know your body once more. "i hate the way you t.. treat her," you continued, breaths deep from the attention given and at the mention of kiramman. "i hate it."

violet peppered kisses all over your neck, tugging down on your shirt to reveal the curves of your chest. "i was just being nice," she repeated as she tried to fight the grin that was threatening to tug on her sly lips.

"oh, fuck being nice, vi." you groaned, pulling away from her touch for a second before she held your lower back and pulled you towards her completely, burying her face in your chest. you let out a huff of breath and looked to your side, deciding on whether or not to let the embarrassment creep in as you told her your unpleasant feelings. "'s fucking.. annoying."

the hold on your waist was tight and warm, her embrace locking you to her own body. violet inhaled your scent and kissed you through the fabric of your shirt. "sounds like you just need your pussy pounded, baby."

you groaned loudly and attempted to pull back once more in annoyance, which was effortlessly countered by violet's strong arms as she kept you locked in place, glued to her. "kidding, baby. i'm kidding," she said, as if offering peace to hopefully subside your anger. "i can stay away from 'er, don't worry, sweetheart." she added, her eyes looking big and genuine as the light of the room shined brightly in them as she looked up at you.

you held the sides of her face while your eyebrows knitted, a sign of defeat in the argument. "you promise?"

violet smiled and kissed the valley of your breasts. "yes," a peck. "yes, i promise," she added.

heavy breaths and the sound of vi's lips sucking on everything she could clasp it to filled the living room along with its cozy ambience. a whine left your lips as her rough fingertips tugged slightly on your left nipple as her warm tongue pressed against your other.

"sweet, sweet baby," violet moaned, feeling her underwear drench in arousal from hearing just how good she makes her girl feel. "you just needed attention, didn't you?" she hummed, eyeing her work of covering your chest with purple-hued bruises, before getting back to work and licking a long stripe along the curve of your breast.

your hand found its way to the ends of violet's hair, the tug making her thick eyebrows furrow, closed eyes opening and finding their way straight to yours with a glint of excitement. "hm?" you hummed teasingly at her unbreakable stare. violet continued her actions, her kisses getting wetter and sloppier, the familiar beer and mint smell of her lips lingering on your sticky skin. "i taste good?" you joked, hands lost in her bright pink locks.

violet smiled and perked your underboob before pressing her chin in the middle of your breasts before speaking. "mhm. tastes good, sweets." vi smiled.

you gave her a cheeky smile in return and tilted your head. "like a cupcake?" you giggled at your own joke.

violet's eyebrows pressed nearly together at the humor. "exactly like one," she answered, making your smile drop almost immediately which made her instinctively pull you closer to her before having the chance to pull away from your position as a loud laugh left her lips, as if annoying you.

"stupid."

violet smirked, "sure, baby. you gonna let me fuck you now?"

"whatever."

"attagirl."

[cbartonscoffee]

I think I've never been more aware of just how many people only get their info of the batfam through fanfic. I finally started reading Red Robin (2009) and I can not believe how many things are blown out of proportion. Particularly about Dick and Damian.

First of all, Dick does try to put limits and he does get fed up with Damian's ways sometimes. Out of the three first interactions of them in the comic, at least in two he tells him to shut up. And one of those is when Damian starts to brag about being Robin and Tim being useless, he tells him to shut up twice.

Another thing about that moment, is that they treat it like Dick completely dismisses Tim and treats him as unimportant. He doesn't. He takes him seriously, he tells him he needs him, he tells him he views his as an equal, as someone capable. And he also tells him he's concerned about him and that he needs to start processing Bruce's death. Could that have been a little harsh? Yes, but he needed to do it without making Tim think there was room for him to be convinced about his theory because let's be honest, Tim would've taken anything less than complete refusal and tried to change his mind. And had he been wrong neither of them could have taken it.

Secondly, Dick is always left to shoulder the blame of kicking Tim out and of never reaching out. That's bull. And I need to make that clear. Tim was in a delicate point, he tells us this himself multiple times, but the decision to leave was completely made out of his own free will. Another thing he did was put space between him and the people on Gotham. We see only one time in which Dick tries to call him. Tim picks up and tells him he doesn't want to talk. This tells us that Dick respecting Tim's wish of space included almost no (or even no) contact, and Dick calling was not something Tim appreciated or encouraged.

Now. Going into the second year of the run, when he's back in Gotham, there's a few things to talk about and I'm still in the aftermath of Damian and Tim's fight.

I feel it's important to say that even if they are all family, more often than not they're doing their own thing. Like, Babs and Steph are in the Batcave while Dick and Damian are in Wayne Tower, Cass is said to potentially be in Hong Kong and we haven't even heard Jason be name-dropped except for the fact that he went on a rampage at some point.

So, Dick is immediately called away in League business. So he isn't there. Damian is behaving fairly civil besides being a brat, so no one wastes too much effort in correcting what he says. We need to think about the fact that this is a kid whose world was turned upside down multiple times in a short period of time, who has a need to be accepted, and who hasn't yet found his place. All this is to say, that if it's difficult to get him to eat breakfast there's no way they're controlling his every move and that's understandable.

So Dick is away, Damian is still trying to adapt, Alfred has his hands full and everyone else is doing something else.

The whole thing starts because Tim is being kind of cryptic about what he's doing with his hit list and Damian feels left out and goes looking for more. He finds his name in a hidden double side of the hit list marking him as a threat. He understandably feels hurt and angry, because he's a kid, and he's trying, and his predecessor who at this point doesn't even try with him anymore views him as something bad.

So in classic Damian fashion, he falls back on his upbringing and doesn't deal with the situation as one should, talking about it. Instead he cuts team line, hurting before being hurt. It could've been worse, we see in the panel that Tim doesn't have that much of a hard time getting safely to the ground. The problem is that he snaps and starts a full-blown fight he knows Damian won't back out off. (I'm pleased to add that after cutting his line Damian doesn't start anything else)

So they are fighting, Tim has the clear advantage and he knows this, we know this. And that's how Dick finds them. Having just returned from a JL mission, in the place where the Waynes were murdered, with Tim having overpowered Damian.

They go back to the cave and Damian shares his findings, and Dick understands. And Tim tells him he (Dick) knows why he (Tim) did it. Dick agrees, and tells him he should have tried to make it harder to find. Tim says he hadn't thought Damian would try or even care. Dick tells him Damian wants to be accepted.

All in all, so far the only thing this comic has proven to me is that there's a reason comics are the bomb and that fanon has gotten out of hand. I get making things out to be worse for the sake of a story, but everything surrounding these events is basically used as the foundation for Damian and Tim's relationship as well as Dick and Tim's and I don't think I've once read a fanfic where these events are portrayed correctly or even following the real motivations of the characters. This is a disservice to all of them and only serves to amplify the hate towards a character that doesn't deserve it. There's a lot of Damian hate going around. And it sucks. Mostly because people use his actions against Tim to justify it and honestly? I don't think you should be allowed to use that if you haven't read RR and understood what was going on.

[ahgasegotarmy116]

Just Take It | Bonus Drabble 6

Summary: Your water breaks and Jungkook takes care of everything. Pairing: Inexperienced f!reader x Best Friend's Dad Jungkook (20 year age gap) Word Count: 971 (ik it's short but I hope you enjoy 🥰) Warning: Pregnancy and the beginnings of labor a/n: Barely edited per usual Requested by: an anon 💜 Start from the beginning

"Jungkook" I say, standing in place not daring to move a muscle when I feel a puddle of water start pooling around me, knowing it would happen soon...but not this soon.

"Coming!" he calls from downstairs, unsuspecting of everything yet and soon he's walking through our doorway. "Hey what was that splashing sound I just hea-" he asks, stopping in his tracks when he sees the same puddle I've been staring at since it happened.

"Did...did your water break?" he asks, walking over to me tentatively, seeing how distressed I already look. "I think so?" I say, not completely sure since this is my first pregnancy and there were so many things I had to learn along the way. 

"It's okay let's just get in the car and I'll call the doctor when we're on our way" he says gently, ushering me out of the room and down the stairs carefully, no doubt wishing I would've just stopped using them when I was this far along.

"I'll run back upstairs and get the bag" he says, placing a kiss on my temple and practically flying up them, going two or even three steps at a time. 

I breath through what I had thought were just Braxton Hicks, thinking they would eventually go away but it all makes sense now since these have lasted for so much longer. 

I had been hiding the fact that I had been feeling them all day today so I know when I tell the nurses how far apart my contractions are Jungkook's going to be upset that I didn't tell him sooner. 

He's back downstairs in a flash, bringing me a simple maxi dress so I can take off the one I'm wearing which is now wet as well as some underwear that he knows I don't care about. He helps me change and gives me one of his big warm coats to put on over it and soon we're in the car on our way to the hospital, the nurse on speaker phone letting her know we're coming. 

"How far apart are your contractions?" she asks, taking note so she can see how far along we are into the process already. "About ten minutes apart, they last for about a minute but I haven't really timed it so I don't know for sure" I relay and cut myself off with a sharp intake of breath when another one comes on.

"Okay and you guys are how far out?" she asks, concerned that things are progressing pretty quickly since we're not there yet. "About ten minutes, her water broke like five minutes ago" he says, trying to keep his voice as level as possible but I know he's nervous. 

"Well just drive safe and we'll be waiting for you outside when you get here" she relays and hangs up soon after, leaving Jungkook to do as instructed. 

"It's okay, we'll make it in time" I say, rubbing Jungkook's arm, hoping to give him some sense of comfort. "Are you okay? Do they hurt a lot?" he asks, glancing over at me, even more concerned now that he sees that I'm sweating, but when he tries to put the a/c on I stop him, telling him I'm cold.

"They're not too bad" I say but my face contorts in pain once another one starts, breathing through it leaving Jungkook following to keep me on track. "We're almost there" he says, the eta reading four minutes now and I nod and close my eyes, willing myself to stay strong through this.

Once we're in the parking lot he sees the nurses waiting with a wheelchair for me at the front and pulls right up to the entrance, getting out to help me out of the car before parking in one of the spots right up front with a labor and delivery sign on it.

"How are you my darling?" Jungkook says once we're reunited in my hospital room, the staff having just settled me in before going to get the doctor. He runs his fingers through my hair and although it's dampened with sweat he doesn't seem to mind at all.

"I'm okay" I say in a hushed tone, the contractions getting closer together now but both of us feel a sense of relief now that we're finally here and safe in the hospital. "I love you so much, you're doing so well" he says, placing a kiss on my forehead, a soft smile rounding my lips. 

"How long do you think it'll take?" I ask, dreading how long this journey will be and he just gives me a pained smile in response. "I don't know, but just know that I'll be with you every step of the way" he says and places a kiss on the back of my hand, holding it between both of his.

"Just remember that after all of this we'll be walking out of here with our beautiful baby boy or baby girl" he reminds me and I smile again at the thought of it, the three of us finally together. 

"And you'll be happy? I know you wanted a girl but will you be happy if it's a boy?" I ask, both of us deciding early on that we wanted the gender to be a surprise. "Of course I'll be happy" he rushes to say, wanting to quell any of my worries. 

"They are a physical representation of the love we share so I will be happy no matter what" he says giving me that last reassurance I need. "I love you" I say and he smiles and leans down to kiss me, "I love you too" he responds and rests his hand on my stomach, one of the last times he'll do so before our beautiful blessing comes into the world, the one we've been waiting for for so long...

Series Masterlist

Taglist: @jkslipppiercing @trina864 @kaitieskidmore97 @goddesofimortality @coolbluedude @coralmusicblaze @whoa-jo @00frenchfries00 @pastelpinkjoon Taglist continued in the comments 💜

Join my Taglist!

Feel free to fill out the form or just comment on any of my fics to be added :)

[kiwriteswords]

Sweet Comic Valentine [Aaron Hotchner x Best Friend!Reader]

Ki2k Masterlist||MainMasterlist (not updated, sorry!)|| Ao3||Word Count: 600|| AN: a lil v-day fluffy friends-to-lovers ficlet for my ki2k Fluff day! Requests are still open for Ki2k!!

Tags/Warnings: female reader, Valentine's Day, friends-to-lovers, fluff, no use of y/n, bau!reader

Summary: Why spend Valentine's alone when you could spend it with your boss, who is halfway in love with you?

The bullpen at Quantico was eerily quiet, the kind of silence that only a holiday like Valentine's Day could bring.

Desks were empty, computers slept, and the usual hustle of agents seemed like a distant memory. Only the soft hum of the fluorescent lights filled the air as you sat at your desk, drowning in paperwork that didn't know it was a day for lovers.

You had always been close to Hotch, your boss and, somehow, your closest friend within the rigid walls of the FBI.

The two of you had mastered the art of dancing around each other's emotions, a choreography too complex to disturb with confessions or truths that might disrupt the balance you had so carefully maintained.

But the truth was there, simmering beneath every shared glance, every half-smile in the hallway--both of you harbored feelings deeper than the façade of friendship you presented.

He was meticulous, always two steps ahead in every case, yet you could almost read his mind when it came to his next move. And he…well, he seemed to hear your thoughts before they ever made it to your lips. This silent understanding had become your unspoken language, comfortable and familiar.

As the clock ticked closer to the end of a seemingly endless day, you were resigned to spend another Valentine's Day alone, surrounded by cold cases rather than the warmth of a romantic dinner. That was until you heard his steady footsteps approaching your desk, an uncommon sound in the stillness of the evening.

"Hey," Hotch started, his voice breaking through the quiet like a soft but unexpected melody. He stood by your desk, hands in his pockets, looking uncharacteristically hesitant. "I was thinking, instead of both of us spending tonight here, buried under all this," he gestured vaguely to the mountains of paper on your desk, then to his own, "maybe we could go grab dinner?”

As Hotch's invitation to dinner hung in the air, you couldn't help but let out a scoff, eyebrows raised in disbelief. "You do know what day it is, right?" you asked, half-amused, half-serious.

His response came with a hint of amusement, as if he was in on a joke you hadn't heard yet. "Yes, I'm aware it's February 14th," he said, the corners of his lips tugging upward slightly.

"Yeah, Valentine's Day," you pressed on, folding your arms over your chest, "which means any place worth its salt is booked solid. Finding a reservation now would be impossible."

Hotch's smile broadened, clearly pleased with himself. "I know what day it is," he repeated, "which is exactly why I made a reservation weeks ago."

Your confusion was evident as you processed his words. This seemed a little over the top for just two friends grabbing dinner. "What if I had a date tonight?" you asked playfully, challenging him. "You just assumed I’d be free?"

He looked back at you, his amusement clear. "Given that we've spent the last few Valentine's Days in the same way--working late, alone--I figured it was a safe bet. Besides," he added, his tone teasing yet gentle, "I wouldn’t take up your evening without making sure you had a memorable dinner to look forward to."

There was a warmth in his voice that made it hard to stay mock-offended. Hotch had always been thoughtful, but tonight, it seemed there was something more tender, more deliberate in his planning. It was hard to keep up the pretense of casual banter when it felt like there might be layers to his actions, yet unexplored.

"Alright, Hotch," you conceded, shaking your head with a light laugh, both at his foresight and your own unexpected excitement. "Dinner it is. Lead the way." You reached for your jacket, closing your laptop shut. 

As he turned towards the elevator, you followed, a curious flutter in your stomach. Maybe, just maybe, this Valentine’s Day wouldn’t be like the others after all. And perhaps this dinner could turn the page to a new chapter for both of you--one that neither of you had dared to read out loud yet.

[quartzalynlove]

Puns

Pairing: smoke, scorpion, and sub zero x reader (separately)

Summary: telling bad puns about their powers to the Lin Kuei brothers

Warnings: none

A/N: so many thoughts about so many mk1 men

Smoke

You had been waiting to see Tomas all day. Both of your duties in the Lin Kuei so frequently keep you apart, and finding each other at the end of the day is a delight. Sometimes, before going home, the two of you would simply take in the sights at the grounds. It was well into winter, and snow was falling over the palace. In complete silence, you and Tomas held each other in your arms. As time passed you heard him sigh and looked up to see Tomas blink slowly. Placing a hand on his chest, you smiled softly before resting your arms around his neck.

"The cold always did make you tired, my dear." You swayed slowly in his arms.

Tomas' hands found your hips as he gazed at you lovingly, and speaking so softly. "We should go home and warm up, my love."

Smiling, you moved closer to Tomas until your lips ghosted the shell of his ear. You felt him exhale slowly against your chest while he held you tighter.

"Yes," you whispered. "But we shouldn't let the heat be too intense tonight. You know where there's smoke, there's fire."

You felt Tomas hesitate against you, his hands still on top of your back. Pulling back slightly, with an innocent smile, you his face and the curious crease between his brows.

"Did you seriously just say that?" He gave an incredulous laugh.

"What?" You feigned the sincerity of your answer, but your doubly wide smile always gave you away.

You couldn't help laughing due to the look Tomas was giving you, and he soon joined you. Huddling together from the cold, you began walking home.

"Your puns continue to get more and more ridiculous, my love." Tomas looked at you.

You looked back at him, feeling a warmth spread through you at the sight of the crinkled in the corners of his eyes. Smilling, you nuzzled into him further.

"They make you smile."

Scorpion

Ten minutes. That was all the time you had to steal Kuai Liang from his duties at work, but he was wasting that precious time. The man couldn't be taken away from the reports he scanned with that furrowed brow of his. Behind him you whined.

"Kuai Liang," you pouted, throwing yourself over his strong back. "Did you forget this was our time?"

He didn't mean to keep you waiting, the mission reports were just giving him extra stress to process for some reason.

"I'm sorry, my precious. I won't make you wait much longer."

But he did. It wasn't really Kuai Liang's fault, he was hardly paying attention to the time. However, only five minutes remained, and you couldn't bear to wait until the end of the day to be with him again.

Kicking you feet boredly in the corner, and idea came into your head. Your lips curled as you sprang to your feet, approaching Kuai Liang from behind. Quietly, you stepped closer to him until you could throw your arms around his torso. It was more like a hug from behind at first.

"Kuai Liang," you called again in a sing-song voice.

You knew that act on its own wouldn't get him to budge, so you began tugging him towards you playfully. The final pull, however, had a bit more strength to it.

"Get over here!" You commanded with the faintest rumble in your voice.

Kuai Liang found himself stumbling back, forcing him to grab onto you for support. You were laughing to yourself as he quickly realized you had pulled another one of your schemes. Giving in, he let his body relax against yours.

"Are you mocking me?" He chuckled, bringing a warm hand to cup your cheek.

"Mocking you? Why, beloved, I'd never." You gasped dramatically before a fit of laughter gave you away.

Not wasting anymore time, you brought your hands to Kuai Liang's chest, lingering only for a moment before you pulled him by his armor. The distance between your faces was closed, and you could practically taste his ashen kisses on your lips.

"Come here." You tugged him, impersonating your lover once more.

Sub Zero

Bi-Han was angry. Again. Although he would easily frighten most people with the frozen aura of his rage, he seemed to thaw whenever he lost his temper near you. Often you wondered if he was aware of it or not.

Although it was what he wanted, you wouldn't let Bi-Han find a quiet place for himself. The last thing he needed was to be alone to ponder his angered thoughts.

Quickly, you stood by Bi-Han as he stared out of your living room window with that signature scowl on his face, "Sweetheart, your brothers mean no harm." You said as softly as you could.

You had been trying to calm him for some time, but that seemed to do it. With a sharp sigh, Bi-Han finally started to relax, though still slightly upset. He turned away from the window, but did not look at you.

"It's just so frustrating when they don't realize what we could make the Lin Kuei."

Slowly now, you walked towards Bi-Han, carefully taking his hand in yours and placing the other on his chest. Finally, he looked at you, softening even more.

"Perhaps it would help all of you if you listened to them once in a while." You suggested.

Bi-Han broke your shared gaze once again, clearly against the idea. His hand started to grip yours, but you wouldn't let it, tracing slow circles on the back of his hand.

You smiled as you stared at the side of Bi-Han's face. "For a man able to wield ice, you do have such a fiery temper, my sweet."

Bi-Han halted as he registered your words. Then he looked back at you with such indifference in his face. Your lips twitched as you smiled, trying to hold back laughter. Taking his hand out of yours, Bi-Han turned, beginning to walk away from you.

"Puns at a time like this." He said more to himself than you.

Hopelessly, you tried to catch up with him, "Please, there's no need for the cold shoulder." You couldn't contain your laughter at that point.

Bi-Han kept walking, not even looking back at you. "I'm going to bed."

[mnnuni]

Into you

Elliot Stabler x reader

Summary: an undercover operation that exposes some other kind of secrets

Words: 4498

Warnings: mentions of drugs, eventual smut -but very filthy-

Author's note: first of all, sorry if it's too long. Second, yes it is based on Ariana's song, or at least the movie it started in my head when I heard the song on shuffle. Little note in the note: this story is not necessarily in any time and place of the series, I just included Munch and Cassidy because I'm (kinda re)watching season 1 and I love them so much.

* gif and images from Pinterest

* dividers from @cafekitsune

"You're sure you want to do this?"

(Y/N) couldn't say how many times Olivia had already asked her that question, in different ways and places of the district.

She inhaled, closed her eyes

You can do it

"I'm sure Liv, don't worry"

Her colleague smiled at her through the mirror, "then let's finish this make up".

Their team was organising an undercover operation in a fancy club, it was an easy thing : go in, find the drugs, go out.

Of course there was a little detail that determined how the operation was gonna be; this club had a high standard for its clientele and specific rules they had to follow, number one being : "only couples allowed".

Now, the easy take was to send the infamous Benson and Stabler and call it a day, but Olivia couldn't because she had too many extra hours covered already. The next couple would have been (Y/N) and Cassidy, if Munch wouldn't have explained for ten minutes straight how Brian wasn't ready to do a thing like that.

So that left her to work with Elliot.

If it was a normal job (Y/N) wouldn't have worries of any kind, Elliot was a good cop and she trusted him with her life; but going out in a club made for sex and whatnot, faking being the girlfriend of the coworker she so desperately wanted ... that was another thing. That was also the reason why Olivia was so concerned for her, she was the only one that caught (Y/N) staring at her partner in a different way someday -at least she hoped so, even if the others could have known they never said anything-

Elliot was done dressing up ten minutes ago and everyone was growing bored to wait for the women.

"You done playing, ladies?" Munch started screaming and pounding on the door of the locker room, "come on we don't have all night".

When the duo got out the first thing the men noticed were (Y/N)'s legs : she wore a deep blue-almost black dress, it almost reached the knees on the right leg and was shorter on the left. Cassidy whistled when his eyes travelled up her figure and landed on her chest, tightly held up by the dress straps. (Y/N) did a spin, moving her curled hairs in the process and showed her half-bare back.

"Well Miss (Y/L/N) can surely do the work"

"Thank you Much", she was trying so hard not to fumble dressed like this in front of her colleagues, but they didn't have to know that.

"Y-you have, um, I can see your lace" Cassidy said pointing at her upper body, he tried to smirk and be flirty but he got too caught up when (Y/N) got closer "It's intentional Brian, now don't get too flustered". Munch chuckled and his partner was about to defend himself when Cragen cleared his throat and announced they were ready to go.

Elliot was the only one to not say a single word. Noone knew that was because his brain short circuited for a moment seeing (Y/N) like that.

I'm so into you

I can barely breathe

Even in the car to the club he remained silent, too caught up in his head, until they were almost there and (Y/N) was about to explode "now that we're still off, are you okay?" ; her voice startled him for a moment, he nodded and mumbled a sure and kept driving. Five minutes later they were parking.

Elliot took a big breath and finally turned to face her, "okay, so, if someone or something triggers you at any moment for any reason, you tell me and we're out" she nodded and then saw their van stopping few meters away so she leaned in to Elliot and searched in his jacket to switch the microphone, "do you hear us?", someone in the van switched the headlights on and off to answer her, "let's go then"

Elliot got out of the car and went to open the door for her, proceeding to take her arm in his to walk to the club. At the entrance there were two big men with the guest lists, "Stabler", he looked at them for a moment then checked his papers. It was a strangely nice feeling to be part of the "Two for Stabler", (Y/N) wanted to feel like this for real not just for a job.

The man stepped aside and opened the door for them; the first thing they saw was the wardrobe where (Y/N) left her jacket, then they were guided to a red lit corridor that ended to a glass door. There they were, in the middle of the upper class most scandalous nights, they were walking arm in arm between politicians, rich entrepreneurs and whores.

They walked to the bar to have a full view of the room: in the centre there was a little stage for the dj and the eventual singers, all around there were occupied tables, at the left side there were sort of cabins to be more private and to the right big glass doors that they knew took to the private rooms.

(Y/N) was the one facing the bar, counting all the staff members while Elliot, next to her, scanned the rest of the room to search their suspects.

"What can I get you, beautiful?"

(Y/N) was sure the bartender talked to her just because he was mere inches apart from her face, otherwise she wouldn't have think he would have flirted with her, while at work.

Elliot turned in an instant, placing his arm around her back "she would have a Martini, and a soda for me" he was shooting daggers to the poor man, who instantly backed away to do their orders.

(Y/N) was looking at him with a clear expression of "was that necessary?" and he just got closer to her, "what? You're mine tonight"

Her eyebrows shot up so fast she thought she was losing them; Elliot too was a little surprised by his choice of words, even if he so desperately wanted them to be true and not just for tonight.

But close ain't close enough

'Til we cross the line, hey, yeah

So name a game to play

And I'll roll the dice, hey

(Y/N) smirked and turned to face him, "you should..." she bit her lip and unbuttoned his shirt a little "I think it's better like this"

The bartender came back with their glasses before Elliot could say anything, "thank you" she looked at his tag "Brandon" he smiled and was about to go back to work but (Y/N) reached out and took his hand "excuse my boyfriend here, he's not used to share me" he smiled "no I'm sorry, I didn't gather you two were..." Elliot brought her to his chest "together? Yes"

"Tell me Brandon, is there a way we could use your private services?"

Elliot knew that they had to, but oh was he nervous to be in a bedroom with her.

"Did you make a reservation?"

She shook her head, "don't worry, you can wait at one of the private tables. One of us will call you when you can go in the rooms", he then guided them to the right side of the club.

To any possible looker these two were one of the other couples tangled in eachother, waiting for a new experience. In reality (Y/N) had her legs on Elliot's ones to be more closer and be clearly heard in the microphone, she was describing every customer to whoever was listening to them in order to have a complete list of witnesses, just in case. She drank a little and then went to play with Elliott's shirt's collar; he had one of his hands gripping her thighs and the other arm around her, laid on the back of the sofa and occasionally brushing strands of hair off her face.

They were so fucking close to each other.

Every now and then Elliot mumbled something, just to not look suspicious but he really couldn't formulate something longer that two sentences with (Y/N)'s lips so close to his face.

After the longest twenty-five minutes of his life a man cleared his throat next to them, Elliot was so scared of the possibility this was just another flirty guy who wanted to try it with (Y/N) -this open sex club was extremely hard to accept for a man like him- but fortunately it was the chauffeur for the rooms. He led them to the big glass doors and left them in another corridor with a pair of keys and the number five on them.

After he left them alone it was the first instant when they weren't touching in any way and they missed the contact immediately, so much that Elliot took her hand in his.

(Y/N) exhaled a breath she didn't know she was holdin when Elliot closed the door of their room, "okay, so report of the room : massive bed"

They started to search in every corner for anything that could help them with the operation while describing everything out loud.

"I've never seen this many condoms in my life" she suddenly said after opening two drawers, Elliot blushed looking at her with the envelopes in her hands. "Also, the flavour matches the one of the condoms found in the hotel, so now we have the confirmation that they're from here"

"How are you so sure?"

"Well for one, I have the assurance that no pharmacy ever has sold "coke flavored condoms" and because there's the name of the club on the envelope"

He just nodded, "right" and proceeded to open another drawer "oh look we have toys too", Elliot picked up a pair of fluffy handcuffs and showed them to her, "you like 'em detective?"

Was he...nah

Either way, she couldn't let him win, so she marched to him to whisper "I tend to use them to others, not me"

Oh, baby, look what you started

The temperature's rising in here

They were ready to inspect anything further when (Y/N) heard walking from the corridors, "someone's coming" "what?" and then a knock on the room next to them "they're entering the rooms" Elliot whispered.

"Loose the jacket"

He was about to ask why, but he knew better than to question her; she was so hot commanding orders. He carefully positioned the jacket on the back of a chair "I'm gonna put you here guys". When he turned back he found (Y/N) sat on the bed, taking off her heels "what are you-?" "We're supposed to look couply here, we can't be caught investigating" she obviously was right, but Elliot was in a very difficult position here now after she shoved him on the bed.

"So we're..." he was making some gesture with his hands while (Y/N) tried to find the courage to do something, "we have to" "yeah" and then he sat straight on the bed, waiting, thinking.

Elliot didn't have time before (Y/N) moved slightly her dress and positioned herself on his lap whit her legs on either side of him

Is this gonna happen?

Been waiting and waiting for you to make a move (ooh, ooh)

Before I make a move (ooh, ooh)

"Are you sure?"

Elliot was literally burning up.

Then she took his hands and put them on her hips, nodding. They felt so good on her.

They heard more loud walking so they inched closer, then a knock "room service";

So, baby, come light me up

And maybe I'll let you on it

A little bit dangerous

But, baby, that's how I want it

Poor guy didn't get an answer because they launched at each other to kiss. One of Elliot's hands travelled to her exposed back and the other gripped her hips more firmly. (Y/N)'s lips tasted of lipstick and were so soft to his rough kiss he wanted to die like this;

A little less conversation and a little more touch my body

'Cause I'm so into you, into you, into you

her hands were gripping his hair and taking him even closer to her. When her breasts pressed to his chest and he felt her lace to his portion of exposed-by-the-unbottoned-shirt pecs he was losing it, Elliot moved her hips on him and that's when she moaned in his mouth.

At the other side of the microphone their colleagues were a mix of confused and delighted.

Got everyone watchin' us

So, baby, let's keep it secret

A little bit scandalous

But, baby, don't let them see it

"Are they...?" Cassidy was having the time of his life when (Y/N) moaned

"They are" they could hear Elliot's now because (Y/N) was kissing his neck "they so are", confirmed Olivia and Munch.

That's when another knock was heard and finally the person opened the door.

The couple got off each other's lips just because the guy excused himself. Then reality came back down again.

Elliot moved to hear the man better, putting his hands under (Y/N)'s butt to cover her.

"I'm sorry to interrupt you, I am at your service tonight" he had a tray with champagne in his hand and just a pair of trousers on. (Y/N) didn't falter for a second there, getting up and meeting their guest, "oh don't be sorry, we got a little carried away"

She could hear Cassidy chuckles in her head.

"I'm (Y/N), come meet my boyfriend" she took the tray from him and gestured for the guy to sit next to Elliot, who introduced himself. She then sat on the other side of the guy, putting her legs on both the men's ones; Elliot gave her a side glance at how comfortable she looked putting herself on this guy.

"Tell us..."

"Caleb"

She smiled, "Caleb, how does it work, your service?"

He proceeded to explain how they were a fancy club for couples who wanted to explore their sexual lives, he didn't know but the more he talked the more criminal sentences he was giving this place. Elliot was more than pleased to look at (Y/N) flirt and touch this man to give them everything and more they needed.

"And tell me, is there a way to have some... Incentives?" she got up to sit down on Elliot again, "you see my boyfriend here has a hard time with all my eccentricities, but he's willing to try tonight and I'm sure that with some magical helps he would love to have the both of us"

Elliot was dying under her caresses.

The guy was starting to negate the service when he jumped in the ring again, "we're willing to pay more, of course"

Caleb's eyes lit up then; he agreed and got up to a wall, pressed some invisible buttons and revealed a cabinet full of any kind of powders.

"Now the party can start"

This was (Y/N)'s signal to the team to start moving.

While Elliot was next to Caleb pretending to choose what would have been his poison, they heard some commotion from the outside. They didn't break character for a minute, (Y/N) was comfortably laying on the bed when Munch got the door down and declared the guy under arrest.

"Finally"

Now, the easy part was done: the club was shot down, the owners were arrested and the ADA had so much proof to put everyone working there behind bars that they even thanked the team.

The hard times were just about to start when an hour later they were still at the precinct doing reports; Elliot and (Y/N) didn't have a chance to talk yet and she was almost grateful for this, what could she even possibly say? Sorry if I devoured your face and I used our operation as an excuse to make out to you?!

She kept her head low and just wrote in the files for the entire time, she was also grateful no one said anything about their work -even if she was sure Cassidy and Munch had some sly remarks ready the instant she and Elliot walked out the doors, Olivia only threatened them if they talked. (Y/N) could sense Brian's struggle to shut up at the desk in front of her-

Meanwhile Elliot was just opposite her, on the other side of the room and couldn't take his eyes off of her; they were still in their clothes, (Y/N) just raised her hairs with a clip -which made her ten times sexier in his opinion- and got free of her heels. He did just half the report because he was too engrossed in looking at her, how calmed she seemed while she worked and how she bit her lip from time to time while thinking about bigger words to fill her papers. But mostly he couldn't stop thinking about how stupid he was to not talk to her yet, after he had the best kiss of his life and just wanted to repeat it forever.

(Y/N) was painfully oblivious to Elliot's stare, too preoccupied to avoid taking notice of Cassidy eyes moving from Munch to Elliot -they had practically cleaned her lipstick stains on Elliot's lips and neck for the amount of times they looked at them-

When she was done she got up, handed over her files and went away; she just squeezed Olivia's shoulder on the way, but didn't say a word to anyone.

It took Elliot the time she started the car and drove off to understand he had to move too, but only after Cassidy threw him an eraser and Olivia screamed at him to "go take his girl".

It made him smile to think about her that way.

The knock (Y/N) heard from her door were so strong and determined she instantly went to see whose was, she opened the door with a confused expression on her face.

"Hi"

She just made him space on the door to enter her apartment.

Elliot didn't know where to start, how could he explain things to her when he didn't stop and thought about it?! He inhaled a big breath and prepared himself for a big monologue.

This could take some time, hey

I made too many mistakes

Better get this right, right, baby

"First of all, I'm sorry" she was about to answer but he made a motion with his hand to stop her, "please let me get this all out first"

"Sure, right", (Y/N) sat on the couch and invited him to join her -she was actually shitting herself considering his tone, but she sensed that he needed this moment so she'd wait to do anything, even if she'd wanted to crumble right then and there-

Elliot took a place next to her, diverting his legs in order to face her. Ugh.

Tell me what you came here for

'Cause I can't, I can't wait no more

I'm on the edge with no control

And I need, I need you to know

You to know, oh, yeah

"I'm sorry if anything that I did, or didn't do tonight made you uncomfortable. I wasn't expecting the turn that took the night, but I must specify I was pleasantly surprised."

Maybe (Y/N) could restart breathing.

"(Y/N) you're an amazing woman, I admire you as a cop and I love working with you"

Why did this sound like a rejection? Or worse, a goodbye!?

"But most of all, I loved kissing you tonight"

Oh shit

He took her hands in his, "I know that we're supposed to be professional and I don't want to seem irrational right now, but I'd really fucking like to kiss you again, more then once"

She was flabbergasted. She couldn't form a thought, her jaw was on the floor and her heart was beating at the rate of a heart attack.

"Please say something"

So, baby, come light me up (light me up)

And maybe I'll let you on it

A little bit dangerous (dangerous)

But, baby, that's how I want it (how I want it)

A little less conversation and a little more touch my body

'Cause I'm so into you, into you, into you

(Y/N) pulled him from the shirt and kissed him, more confident than before. She pressed him to her putting her arms around his neck, while his found her waist; she opened her mouth to taste his tongue and he fucking groaned through the kiss, she was ready to fight his tongue for dominance when he pulled away.

"So I guess you..."

"Yes Elliot" she kissed the corner of his mouth "I like you too" and then his jaw "and I really like to kiss you" moving to his neck "and I'd like to do it for quite some time, if you'd like"

"I would love to", he was turning his face to kiss her again but she got closer to his ear to whisper something, "I would also want for you to fuck me, like right now" and then she smirked.

She didn't give him time to do anything because she ran away to her bedroom; Elliot woke up from his trans and followed her, finding her in front of the mirror trying to get away from her dress. He came up behind her and took her hands' place on her zipper.

He unzipped it so slowly, kissing every inch he discovered and then let the dress fall at her feet.

"Fuck"

He palmed her naked breasts, still looking at (Y/N) through the mirror, her head fell on his chest from the pleasure.

"I think you're too much covered" she decided when she turned around and got unbuttoned his shirt with one powerful move.

"Ehi! I liked that shirt" Elliot himself knew he was only half complaining, "I like it better off" she fucking licked her lips looking at his bare torso.

(Y/N) kissed every part of his chest, from the clavicle to his pecs; she sucked one of his nipples and was happily pleased when she realised his breath was becoming more erratic. She trailed her tongue down all his abs until she got on her knees, asking the permission to unbuckle his belt and jeans.

"You can do me whatever you want love"

Love

She worked his clothes rather quickly and stopped only in front of his underwear: shit, he was big. But she couldn't praise him about his size yet. She palmed his boner and got excited enough to yank his underwear away and take his dick in her hands.

Elliot was dying of anticipation there.

After stroking him two times (Y/N) licked his shaft and he hissed. He was ready!

Finally she put her mouth on his tip and sucked all the dick down in her mouth.

"Holy shit", he grabbed her hair and she looked at him with big eyes before she started to move her head up and down. She was phenomenal. At some point she took his balls in her hand and started squeezing, "oh my- (Y/N)"

It took her two minutes of full bobbing before she had to take air, but she never stopped touching him, always licking on nipping his tip. When she put her mouth on him again she started to move faster and sucking harder. Elliot was a moaning mess up there, moving his hips in sync with her.

"Baby I'm gonna-" he couldn't talk, she gripped his ass and sucked his cock so much deeper in her mouth he couldn't even think before he shot down her throat. She kept moving her head until he stopped screaming for her and came down his high.

When she left his dick (Y/N) was smiling and Elliot loved this. He helped her get up, just to take her in his arms and put her on the bed.

"You were-"

"Amazing, I know" he chucked, "you really were", he kissed her neck then, lowering himself on her. He felt her wet panties to his cock, who was already recovering feeling her like this. He moved his hands through all her leg, stopping at her inner thigh and sensing her warmth. Elliot looked her in her eyes when he finally put a hand on her pussy. She hissed at the contact.

"You're soaked baby"

"A good cock might do this to me"

She wasn't even embarrassed to show him how much she wanted him; he smirked and slowly let herself free of her panties.

"Look at her, so pretty and ready for me"

His talking of her pussy made her involuntarily lift her hips, which made Elliot smirk even more before he put a finger on her clit.

"Mmmh"

"That's right love"

Fuck he was good with his fingers. She knew he was only giving his dick time to recover, but (Y/N) was enjoying every minute of his fingers entering her hole. She was gripping his forearm when he pushed his second finger in to "prep her for his dick", he said. She was sure he was just enjoying her so fucked up just by his fingers.

"El I need you, now"

His face lit up, "you sure?", she took his cock and aligned it with her entrance, soaking it with her wetness "I'm sure".

He pushed into her very slowly, he was relishing in every inch of her stretching to his length. When he was done he waited a few seconds to move, admiring (Y/N)'s face while she adjusted to his size; suddenly she moved her hips making him hiss and then start to pound into her at a determinate pace.

"God, yes"

She was feeling every inch of his big dick and she was fucking loving it. He moved so well into her while also paying attention to every other part of her : when he wasn't kissing her neck, he was squeezing her tits or whispering dirty things in her ears.

She was loving his dirty talk.

"Come on baby, let me feel you squeeze my dick"

(Y/N) never moaned so loudly in her life. One of her hands was gripping the sheets and the other was firm to Elliot's back to have him always there, pounding into her, extremely close and sweaty. When Elliot started playing with her clit (Y/N)'s eyes rolled so back he was afraid she'd loose them.

"I-I'm so close baby"

Fuck, she called him baby

Elliot became even faster and impatient to let her finish around him; she was a screaming mess while she cum but Elliot loved her clenched pussy around him. Before he could cum he pulled out and finished on her stomach, still patting her clit while he stroked himself.

It was the sexiest thing (Y/N) ever saw; the scene became even more erotic when Elliot went down and licked his cum from her skin and then got up to her face saying "it tastes like you".

She smiled at him and pulled him in her arms, "after you'd done a thing like this, I'll never give you away"

"And I'll never leave, love"

[hoshifighting]

hey I’m the anon that just requested the mingyu fics, they were so freaking good! I usually hesitate to send in requests but you were so fast , I totally didn’t expect it 😭 loved every bit of it!

if it’s not a bother could I request for mingyu overstimualting reader so much to the point she goes into subspace for the very first time, she’s so clingy and a crying mess but mingyu tries to help her out of it?

Reader going to the subspace for the first time, after overstimulating, with Mingyu

a/n: I'm glad you liked it my love, I always try to respond to all requests when I have free time! xoxo, Lyla. <3

warnings: overstimulation, fingering, subspace, sumbmissive!reader, dom!mingyu, aftercare, overwhelm

Mingyu's fingers moved in and out of you relentlessly, his touch expertly hitting all the right spots. you were a trembling mess beneath him, your body already pushed to its limits from multiple orgasms. your thighs quivered, your breath came in ragged gasps, and tears of overwhelming pleasure leaked from the corners of your eyes.

"Gyu, please," you whimpered, your voice barely audible over the wet sounds of his fingers thrusting into you. "i can't... i can't take anymore..."

but he didn't stop. instead, he leaned in closer, his breath hot against your ear. "one more for me, baby," he murmured, his voice filled with both command and reassurance. "you can do it. just one more."

you shook your head, sobbing softly. "it's too much... i can't..."

Mingyu's fingers curled inside you, brushing against your g-spot with precision, while his thumb found your clit, rubbing it in tight, fast circles. the combination was too intense, and your body arched off the bed, your cries escalating.

"yes, you can," he insisted, his voice firm yet gentle. "you're my good girl, and you can take it. just let go."

your mind was a haze of pleasure and pain, the line between the two blurring until you couldn't distinguish one from the other. you felt another orgasm building, more intense than any before it, and you screamed Mingyu's name as it crashed over you, your body convulsing uncontrollably.

tears streamed down your face as the orgasm wracked your body, and you found yourself slipping into a strange, detached state. the world around you faded, leaving only Mingyu's touch and voice grounding you. you were in sub space, a place you'd never been before, and it was both terrifying and comforting at the same time.

Mingyu slowed his movements, sensing the change in you. he gently withdrew his fingers and pulled you into his arms, cradling you against his chest. "shh, it's okay," he whispered, stroking your hair soothingly. "i've got you. you're safe."

you clung to him, your body trembling as you tried to process the overwhelming sensations. "Gyu... i feel... i feel so..."

"shh," he cooed, pressing soft kisses to your forehead. "you're okay, baby. just breathe. i'm right here with you."

you buried your face in his chest, seeking the warmth and comfort of his embrace. his strong arms wrapped around you, holding you tightly as you slowly came back to yourself. the tears continued to flow, but they were no longer just from overstimulation—they were from the sheer intensity of the experience and the deep connection you felt with Mingyu.

"you're so good," he murmured, his voice a calming balm to your frazzled nerves. "you did so well. i'm so proud of you."

you sniffled, nuzzling closer to him. "i... i didn't know it could feel like that."

Mingyu chuckled softly, his hand rubbing soothing circles on your back. "it's a lot, isn't it? but you did amazing. you're so strong."

"Gyu... it was so much," you mumbled, your voice small and broken.

"i know, baby. i'm sorry," he said softly, kissing the top of your head. "i got carried away. but you're safe now. i'm here."

he held you like that for a while, his touch and voice slowly bringing you back to reality. when you finally felt steady enough, he gently lifted you and carried you to the bathroom. he sat you on the edge of the tub and started running a warm bath, making sure the water was just right.

"let's get you cleaned up, okay?" he said, his voice still soft and comforting.

you nodded, still feeling a bit dazed but grateful for his care. he helped you into the tub, holding your hand as you lowered yourself into the warm water. the heat soothed your aching muscles, and you let out a sigh of relief.

Mingyu knelt beside the tub, gently washing your body with a soft cloth. his touch was tender and careful, his eyes filled with concern as he looked at you. "how are you feeling now?" he asked quietly.

"better," you whispered, your voice still shaky. "thank you, Gyu."

he smiled softly, brushing a strand of hair from your face. "anything for you, baby," he said. "i'm here to take care of you."

after the bath, he helped you dry off and dressed you in one of his oversized shirts, the fabric soft and comforting against your skin. he led you back to the bedroom, tucking you into the freshly changed sheets.

"just rest, okay?" he said, climbing in beside you and pulling you into his arms. "i'll be right here."

you nestled into his chest, feeling safe and loved. "I love you, Gyu," you murmured, your eyes fluttering shut as exhaustion washed over you.

"i love you too, baby," he whispered, kissing your forehead. "just rest now. i've got you."

[bonbonly]

not sure which driver would fit this (maybe carlos or max?) but something about them degrading you so much to the point he buys nipple clamps that connect to a chain. so he treats you like a dog, pulling on your chain to make you move—and each time he does, your nipples harden even more, slick dripping down your pussy……… ohh my god

bon's thoughts (18+) i'm putting this in the boss!lewis x secretary!reader universe because that's all i can see right now

you've been pretty upset the whole month having to deal with lewis edging you and never letting you cum, so you plan an entire thing where you're going to get your payback. your vibrators are all broken with the amount of times you've had to cum in the middle of the night in your apartment after every day of an excruciating day at work where lewis was torturing you like crazy.

so one day during your lunch break, lewis passes by the break room to get a cup of coffee only to instead see you bouncing on another intern's dick, screaming in ecstasy as you stare at lewis the entire time saying "fuck, i'm cumming, i'm cumming!"

and he's biting the inside of his cheek, nodding his head at you. ok, if you wanted to be office slut he'd let you be the office slut. he calls you to his office later in the day, and you walk in adjusting your pencil skirt and stretching your arms, "oh it feels good to have someone's cum dripping down my thighs. so much better when i get to cum too!"

"sit your ass down before i have you fired," lewis rolls his eyes and you smirk at him. he'd never fire you, he has way too much fun with you, "take off your clothes, now."

"but it's the middle of the work day? i have work to get back to, which you gave me remember?" you scoff, and he shakes his head at your attitude,

"run that mouth of yours one more time and i'll buy a ball gag to match this..." he pauses, pulling out a box from his drawer and he holds up nipple clamps. you gasp out loud, standing up,

"nuh uh, i'm not wearing that. lewis, it's bad enough that i have to sit down on a vibrating cock every day when i work, not this...." you cross your arms, pouting at him and he stands up to walk over to where you stand,

"first of all, it's mr. hamilton, you keep forgetting that i'm your boss, not your boyfriend. second of all, this isn't a request, love," he grabs your blouse, ripping the buttons off of you before unclasping your bra and tossing it onto his chair. you struggle against his arms, mainly because it's fun to see him get more pissed at you for being disobedient and he flips you onto your stomach which causes you to moan at the feeling of the cold table pressed against your tits, "you're such a slut, honestly, who even let you into the workforce?"

he giggles under his breath, tugging your skirt and panties down before dragging you down to the ground. he rolls your nipples between his thumbs, loving the way you're gasping and squirming under his touch before reaching out and grabbing the nipple clamps and placing them on you.

"finally, god, you always make this so much harder on yourself," and he sits back down behind his desk, tugging the chain that connects the clamps towards him and you moan out loud, rubbing your thighs together for some friction, "of course you're into this. your brain's just empty at this point with the amount of times i didn't let you cum so now you're into sick shit like this to get you off, right?"

you can't even process his words because you want to feel him inside you, and every time he tugs at the clamps harder, calling you a dirty whore, you're whining about how you want him to fuck you, you want to feel his cum coating your walls. that's enough for him to toss you onto his lap, letting you straddle him. he places the chain in his mouth, biting down into the metal and occasionally jerking his head back to let the clamps pinch your nipples a little more harder than before and when he slides his aching cock inside you, you're letting out a wanton moan that echoes through the entire office. you're sure everyone can hear you. and probably can now see you because lewis at his desk presses a button to let the blinds unveil the sin he's committing. he wants the entire place to know that you're his, and only his.

"this is what you wanted? you wanted to get fucked? you wanted me to fuck your brains out until you're just another dumb whore to take my cum, yeah? you're doing all this just so you can cum, yeah you're gonna cum," his hips snap against yours in a brutal pace, and you're crying at how intense this feels. you scream out loud as his thumb rubs harsh circles on your sensitive nub, and you're cumming around his cock for the first time, feeling like you're on cloud nine. he took his words to heart though, because he's still fucking you, his grip on you tightening, "i'm going to make you cum again and again until you're begging me to stop, oh fuck, you're going to regret riding that intern love."

you don't know how many times you've cum, and you're pleading with him telling him that you can't take it anymore but he flips you onto your stomach and starts rutting into you once more. you glance out the window of the door to see the intern just staring at you with wide eyes and he walks away, his cheeks turning red.

"i thought you wanted to cum? you spent all this time whining and crying about how i never let you cum! and now that i'm letting you, you're telling me to stop? make up your mind. unless you're too fucked out that your dumb brain can't think properly, is that it sweetheart? is my cock too much for you?" he laughs in your ear, and you're wailing out loud as you cum for another time, squirting all over his desk as he smacks your ass for making such a big mess. he wraps his hand around you to tug at your clamps and you whine out loud.

he takes you home with him that night, refusing to let you take those clamps off. "we're far from done, love. don't forget that."