#I'm gonna scream about it forever.
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NOBODY TALK TO ME.
#IGNORE THE YT BAR THING I'M TOO EXCITED TO CARE#SCREAMING CRYING MY KING HE'S BACK HE'S HOME !!!!!!#AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH#THIS IS ALL I'M GONNA TALK ABOUT FOREVER AND EVER#pho.posts#empires smp#hc s10#smallishbeans#hermitcraft tcg
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He tightens his hold around the inert Jedi in his arms, and uses the Force to leap from the metal-strewn crater and onto solid ground. Several startled soldiers turn on him, their weapons lifting, until Kira hastily waves them off. If they harbour any hesitations about obeying her direction, the Sith’s burning glare gives them plenty of incentive to fall back. As though they truly could have stood in his way. Without hesitation Scourge pushes past them, heading as swiftly as he dares for the monorail and the emergency landing platform that waits outside. He is oddly, intensely aware of his fingers digging into Caspian’s jolting body, of the Jedi’s armour scraping against his own. The way the weight of the other’s head has rolled against him, bloodied brow resting upon the Sith’s aching shoulder; and now Scourge feels a different sort of pain spasm through his tightening chest. “I have you, Jedi,” he breathes raggedly. It makes no sense, Caspian clearly cannot hear him - and yet he feels the need to say it. To reassure him. I have you. You are safe. - Fall On Me, With All Your Light
I love commissioning artists to draw scenes from my stories. This one was truly a dream commission of mine, and I finally had the chance to see it come to life under the incredible patience and skill of hifarry on dA. The colours, the atmosphere, the details - this is everything I wanted from this piece, and I am beyond ecstatic!
#swtor#swtor art#star wars the old republic#jedi knight#lord scourge#swtor oc#swtor jedi knight#swtor scourge#sith pureblood#swtor fanart#star wars art#swtor:caspian#kem oc#otp: we choose our own fates#HI I'M GONNA BE SCREAMING ABOUT THIS FOREVER#IT'S SO PERFECT TO THE SCENE IN MY BRAIN AHHHHH
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i would like to stop experiencing the full spectrum of human emotions every day please. putting this out into the universe
#had suchhh a good workday. had hot pot with my roommate where we talked about our quarter life crises#and then came home and had a 3 hour screaming match with both of my parents where i said i was cutting them out of my life#it turns out. my dad still does not understand what the word bi means even tho his fucking wife is bi#he was like 'so you marry someone and six months later you see someone else you like and u go marry them instead?'#like genuinely. truly trying to understand#and that shocked me enough to stop crying#do not reblog please#like in hindsight it is SO funny#and that was the point where i was like. wait is this not malice#this is homophobia but i don't think it's malice#anyways we're all Ok now#we've agreed that i'm going to do what i want#and even if they're unhappy they're still gonna have a relationship with me#and they'll figure out how to adjust#my brother periodically came into the room and also screamed at my parents#i feel bad for them a lil bit. like they're not bad people#after he left my mom told me that a week and a half ago#my brother came into her room and told her that when she died he would bury her in a grave instead#of the traditional last rites (cremation rituals etc etc)#if she wouldn't accept me#and my mom said she was on a bunch of meds cause she's sick so she was so out of it it didn't even register what he was going on about#and then today after that convo she was like WAIT A MIN WHAT THE FUCK DID THIS BOY SAY TO ME#funniest 16 year old u could have on your side#truly he kept coming into the room every 5 min and going HEY HAVE YOU BOTH CONSIDERED NOT BEING HOMOPHOBIC. HAVE YOU.#HEY CAN U TELL YOUR DAUGHTER YOU STILL LOVE HER MAYBE??? THINK??? USE YOUR BRAIN???#this is why i would die for this kid#he's the best#he's such an idiot most of the time but when he's not being an idiot he's my favorite person on earth#don't tell him that tho anyone please#he'll hold it against me forever and ever as siblings do
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actually squealing at the scene where ye shiqi offers her his water and food by the river and she's all "you're so capable... lucky for the girl who's going to marry you in the future" and he glances over at her and smiles all shyly HELPPPP
#i was trying to find a gifset of this but i couldn't so i have to scream about in a text post instead of my usual wailing in tags#don't make me have to gif it myself 😭😭😭#lost you forever#my ramblings#i can feel that i'm gonna be insufferable about this drama for the near to intermediate future i apologize in advance
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i'm gonna be honest i'm doing pretty bad rn. i'll live but somethings gonna snap sooner or later
#germ and disease paranoia mixed with emetophobia mixed with the state of the world#mixed with feeling bad abt feeling bad bc EVERYONE is living thru most of this stuff and is doing fine. they've got jobs and lives and stuff#meanwhile i'm holding on by a thread here.#snapping could be as small as shaving my head or as big as running thru the streets naked screaming i'm not entirely sure#another level of fear for me. what do i do at my breaking point. i've never been there before#but i'm walking on a tightrope rn#it just feels like i get like 5 days out of every month we're everything is okay. and the rest of it is just bad and fear#and i'm expected to use those 5 days to be productive but i have to use it to recharge#and it isn't even enough days to do that#i'm just tired in my head. the last time i wasn't was 5 years ago and that's hitting really hard#and that's an example of what i'm talking about! everyone lived thru covid and they're LIVING THEIR LIVES NOW. i should be able to too#i have no room to complain so many have it so much worse than me#i can't keep having breakdowns in bed at 2 in the morning. it's been on and off for 5 years#when are things gonna be ok again. get good without something else getting worse.#is it ever gonna be that way again? can it please be that way again?#i miss being 10 i miss my old house i miss my hometown i miss when things were simple#i had all these things to do i had friends and was every teachers favorite student and everything felt like it was gonna be alright#now it feels like nothings ever just gonna be ok. i think everything gonna just be wrong forever#i'm gonna go take a shower and try to clear my head i'll be back later#sassy speaks
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Forever jumping up and down while listing all the great things about Tallulah after she told him she feels worthless )-)0 (<- sobbing on the floor)
#something about Forever's upbeat voice makes me want to cry something about the positive body language#he's trying so hard to make her feel better#to take away the pain#aaaaaaaaaaaa#there's something so parental about it and I'm gonna scream this server will be the death of me#they're all a family!!!#and they're kids!!!#*sobs*#qsmp#liveblogging
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Would it be wrong of me to thrift some stuffed animals for their weighted pellets stuffing and skin?
#I'm probably not gonna do it#I believe in bringing new life into old toys by repurposing their carcasses but now at days thrifts and second hand places have nice stuff#I'm talking about good condition plush toys#like I'm good chopping up clothes pillows and blankets but if it's a toy that could make some kid happy#or some other freak like myself will raid the plush corpse for parts instead. ya never know.#weighted pellets are waaaaay out of my budget forever#fuck that bro#🐑 screaming into a cave#I'd only do it if it's a bag of beanie babies because I think it'd be fun to make a cape from their skin for one of my furbies#specifically the one with the hands
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#super freaking out cos my friend who is a vet has offered me a job at her practice as a care assistant#so my job would just be to do all the little jobs. help looking after the animals. cleaning. sometimes calling patients etc#it's a fantastic opportunity but it looks so much more difficult then anything i've ever done before#and on the one hand i'm like ''yes! i love animals! i need a steady income! this is perfect!''#but on the other... i haven't been at my current job that long. so it feels like a dick move to up and leave.#i don't know if i'd be able to cope with the animals dying all the time. some of the stuff i'd have to do looks really technical#and i'm scared i'll do it wrong (eg put the wrong label on the wrong medicine) and it'll lead to an animal dying#like it's a proper full time monday-friday 9-5 kinda gig#which is great cos my current job is a ''are we gonna give you more than 2 days next week?? who knows! it's a supprise!!''#and that situation is stressing me out. so i do need something different#but this is like a proper serious job. and idk that's scary#plus my friend would be my boss. which i don't mind. but i dont want her to vouch for me and then i'm terrible at it...#cos that's not fair on her#they've offered me a trial shift next week. so i guess i could do that and just scope it out..#it also feels like nepotism which doesn't super sit right#but it's not a sure thing. the other vets and practice owners have to agree and they may not like me. it's not like i have experience#and it's only a low paid position so if its nepotism its not like... super beneficial nepotism...#sigh. i know i should go for it. just last time i went for a big different job like this it ended badly#and i ended up back in retail.#so i don't wanna go thru that all again#but i also dont wanna stay working in this shop forever. it wouldn't be too bad if only i had regular hours. .#and i knew what those hours were more than a week in advance#i know this is like.. a non-problem. i'm just stressing about it#plus its making me feel guilty whenever i go into my current job. like i'm cheating on them#i do need that regular income tho#screams in anxiety
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Feeling homicidal at work today ♡
#there's been major issues with wordpress for Weeks now and my beloved colleague told IT about it and added me#to the 'task' explicitly writing 'please talk to [my name] if you have any further questions or want to discuss things as i am on vacation'#today i come back to this task reading a lovely comment by that dude who's responsible for solving the problem going#'i think it's best if we make an appointment to discuss this when you're back :)' bitch ill kill you#my boy doesn't even Use wordpress it's not even his fucking problem. he just was nice enough to summarize my complaints#so i added a comment too because i honestly can't work like this and want this to be Fixed asap#and if he wants to talk to [beloved colleague] first it's gonna take another 2 fucking weeks until anyone even considers the problem again#and i have no patience for this left at this point. so of course that bitch calls me when i was marked as 'absent' on teams#(did he fucking do that on purpose?? so he wouldn't actually have to talk to me? also. just Text me you fucking bitch)#and when i come back to it HE was absent so i couldn't call him back and also i won't wait for him to come back online so i can talk to him#because my work hours are Over for this week and he could very well just send me a message or add another comment if he has anything to say#but alas he didn't#i honestly am usually quite patient and understanding when it comes to fixing issues but this has been going on forever#and i wouldn't even say anything if it hadn't been for that stupid ass comment on how he wants to talk to [colleague] first. bitch!#(i just mentioned what the main issue was in my own comment btw. i didn't say anything about hurrying or any of the million#passive aggressive things i WANTED to say. very proud of myself for that ♡#had i been with that dude in person i would have killed him on sight)#god things are gonna be so insufferable when my beloved colleague is gone forever ㅠㅠ#he's the only good thing about this fucking company and I'm sure everything's gonna go down in flames#once he's gone#void screams#work stuff
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nobody:
me: PERSONA 3 REMAKE PERSONA 3 REMAKE PERSONA 3 REMAKE PERSONA 3 REMAKE PERSONA 3 REMAKE PERS
#I'VE BEEN KEEPING MY MOUTH SHUT FOR THE PAST 24 HOURS TO BE CIVIL BUT NAH I CAN'T KEEP IT IN ANYMORE#IF THEY THINK I'M GONNA SIT MY ASS DOWN AND PLAY PERSONA 3 ALL OVER AGAIN THEY ARE RIGHT AND I'M BARKING#THE MORE I THINK ABOUT IT I'M THROWING MYSELF AT THE CEILING AND OUT THE WINDOW#SCREAMING CRYING BURNING MY BREAD#PSH HONKAI STAR RAIL WHO???#ok sorry hsr i still love you bUT PERSONA#PERSONA FOREVER HAVING ME IN A CHOKEHOLD#I WON'T SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT THIS UNTIL IT COMES IN 2024#persona shenanigans#persona 3#aliya.txt
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#ROH#Christopher Daniels#Katsuyori Shibata#my gifs#marie#EXCUSE ME WHILE I SCREAM ABOUT THIS FOREVER#GUYS IT'S HAPPENING TONIGHT I'M SO FUCKING EXCITED#I'M NEVER GONNA SHUT UP ABOUT THIS EVER ACTUALLY#also today i learned that cd is 2-0 against shibata which is so sexy of him actually so this match is gonna be SO good
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lucanus aer'tea song of all time. joy is stored in the dad song!!!
#hanbles#predictably it has clarinets#i realized i was laying in bed kicking my feet like a teenage girl in love in a rom com or w/e#at just the absolute joy this song brings me#it's so him. it's so him.#the clarinets!!!!!!!#anyway i'm gonna be insane abt instrumentation in em's music in general forever. but when she does clarinets.#that's just for me.#i know it's Not actually. but she does it for me#instrumentation stuff i don't get into as much with my music screaming. but it's always on my mind#i'm always two seconds away from ranting about it to anyone who will listen
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GOD THAT TRAILER
I hope the rest of the game is that stylized!!! It looks so good!! I'm so tired of realism give me COOL ART STYLE HELL YEAH
GOD and it'll make it so the game ages better!! I LOVE IT MORE STYLIZATION AHHHHHHH
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#gonna be depressing in the tags for a moment#pls excuse me#but whenevery i see a pair of friends that are like soulmates together#who laugh and scream about what they love and have so many things in common#i always become the personification of ''i want what they have''#ever since i was a child i would pray (you heard that right lol) to get a best friend who shared my interests and passions#(and who was gay but that's included in interests and passions lol tho i didn't know it at the time)#i dream with the sitcom worthy friendships with the you get the key to my house and you can come in whenever#we just spend days sitting together and not even talking just being there#or the next best thing. find it online!#but that will never happen and i need to accept that#not even for lack of trying... i even went to a hobby class for a whole month trying to make friends irl#but it's impossible for the simplest reason... i don't enjoy it!#every time i try to do something new and out of my comfort zone i fail misserably because it's literal hell to me#how can i make a friend if i cannot talk to people?#online or whatever?!#i can't even talk to the people i know from school or whatever#i put in so much fucking effort and freak myself out!#and it's not working and it won't work and idk what to do about it!#so yeah i don't think i'm capable of having meaningful relationships actually#and i need to really accept that cause otherwise i will forever dream with it#like i need to stop trying to chase after it it's just not gonna happen#i guess people have these feelings about romantic partners? well not me lol#anyways...#angel talks#personal
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actually finnick tho. your writing is amazing, from the smallest details to the major takes on his character / plot. i love seeing you on the dash.
* beep beep how’s my portrayal ?
#so what you're saying is i get to just cry about how amazing you are#and how you are pita boy#and how much i adore you#and literally scream when i see you on my dash in any capacity#cause i'm gonna keep doing that forever#cause i actually am obsessed with your blog#and how truly wonderful you do at capturing every nuance of peeta and how incredible you are ????#gamehaunt
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tatum is nine when they read the story of abraham and isaac during bible class. it is the first story that consumes her attention completely. the idea of believing in something so devoutly you could sacrifice what—who—you loved most without question scares her a little.
could she ever do the same?
the question sits heavy in tatum's mind for nearly a week: it plagues every waking moment and seeps into her sleep, twisting dreams to nightmares.
well, that isn't entirely true.
it isn't the question that haunts her. it's the answer.
tatum knows what the answer should be. she knows what good little church going girls should say. she knows what answer her mother would expect of her. she knows what answer the golden cross hanging around her neck should signify.
if god himself demanded the life of the person she loved the most, could she deliver the way abraham had?
the answer should be yes. undoubtedly. without fail. if the lord asked it of her there had to be a reason, and she should fall into line. the answer should be yes.
but it isn't.
because there is no world in which tatum could imagine giving up sidney prescott in any way, shape, or form.
not for a guaranteed place in heaven. not for god himself. not for the world. hell, not for the universe. because a universe without sidney prescott wouldn't be worth saving.
she wonders if that makes her a bad person.
she decides she doesn't particularly care.
on the sixth day of wrestling with the question and the answer, tatum sits up in bed. her hand clasp around the small golden cross glittering on the nightstand, and she bows her head.
"you can have anything else." her voice wobbles as she mutters to empty air, eyes squeezed shut in prayer. "you can have anything else, but you can't have her. not now. not ever. okay? i ... i mean it. do you hear me? if it comes down to a choice between you ... between you and her ... i'll choose her everytime." she swallows thickly, her little heart crashing against her ribcage violently. she thinks if her mother could hear her talking like this, she might have an aneurysm. "if you want her, you have to take me first, okay? please? because ... cause i don't think i could do any of this without her."
she sits in the quiet following that admission, the kind of vulnerability that makes her hands shake and her breathing stutter and her heart stall: sits as the air around her becomes palpable and tears well up in her eyes and it feels so unbearbly stifling in the small room.
she runs her thumb up and down the cross before setting it down on her nightstand. she picks up the stuffed bunny sidney got her for her last birthday—thinks of shy smiles and warm brown eyes that feel like the closest thing to peace tatum has ever seen—and her runaway heart slows.
she knows she made the right choice.
#a snippet from the fic i'm working on!!#fleshing out the backstory and basis of sidney and tatum pre scream#and by golly do i have SO MANY EMOTIONS regarding the two of them#sobbing violently#scream#tatum riley#sidney prescott#tatum loves sidney so much it guts me#like it has physically made me choke up more than once while i've been outlining this fic#i have so many THOUGHTS like i could talk about them forever and a day#but yea we're walking through the 12 years of their life before the massacre at the macher house#fleshing out the riley family#fleshing out the prescott family#the introduction of randy and eventually billy and stu#highlighting particularly life changing moments for each of them#youre gonna love this its a SCREAM BABY
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