#I'm aware I'm putting an embarrassing personal experience on the internet so I'm sorry for inflicting this one you

[hidefdoritos]

PSA:

Always WASH YOUR HANDS after handling essential oils.

Signed, someone who forgot that step before entering the bathroom and is now washing a lot more than their hands. :/

[odinsblog]

i usually use the anon function bc im embarrassed to ask people things sjfjfjhs but I've never sent anything horrible to anyone!! I'm sorry you've had negative experiences with the anon function before, you don't deserve that at all!! sending love!

[re: this post]

Thank you. I genuinely appreciate you rn

People like you are literally the only reason why I don’t completely disable the anon feature, because I understand that sometimes people are shy, or they want to express themselves without taking shit. I actually dO get that

But alas, as with everything, there are those who abuse what really should be thought of as a nicety, or privilege—some people just abuse it

Very long rant, incoming

So here’s the thing, right? Sometimes when people are online, they act and behave in ways they wouldn’t dare to irl

I’m not the government. I don’t have a staff to edit my posts. I’m not anybody special. I’m just some dude on the internet who enjoys sharing my opinions and other things. If YOU don’t like or agree with my opinions or something else that I post, you are completely free to keep scrolling or to block me. That’s fine. But when anons begin demanding that I phrase things the way that they’re more comfortable with, then we got serious issues

And another thing: people need to not be so quick to assume malicious intent where none exists

For example, I have accidentally typed the number 500 in a post when I meant to type 50–now, in the specific post, it truly was a significant error. But an anon immediately jumped into the comments and self righteously accused me of lying to make a point, rather than saying to themselves, “Hm, maybe Odin just made a typo”

And my personal favorites

them: YOU’RE SPREADING MISINFORMATION AND DISINFORMATION !!!!

me: um, it was a fucking joke? do they have jokes where you come from?

Or,

me: posts a video of an alligator and some cranes, and adds a bit of whimsical commentary

them: WELL ACTUALLY, THAT IS PROBABLY PREDATORY BEHAVIOR AND I THINK YOU SHO-

me: no. goddamn, I can’t be fucking whimsical on a social media site? eat shit. stfu

And also,

them: well technically, it’s not really fascism

me: maybe not, but it’s fucking close enough. I’m not gonna wait for people to start getting marched into ovens and say, “now can we call it fascism??”

I have literally had all of these dumb, stupid ass conversations (almost verbatim) here on tumblrdotcom, and lemme tell ya, it’s frustrating af

And other times, when I author a post containing a hyperlink on desktop but then later edit it on mobile, sometimes the hyperlink doesn’t carry over to mobile and you’re left with a post that may say “source,” but is not clickable. It happens sometimes, and it’s not a big deal, right?? WRONG! Instead of sending an ask to ask me what happened to the link, I’ve had anons accuse me of “not crediting” a source

I’ve had people use anon to accuse me of cropping videos so that I could somehow “steal” credit from others, and I’m just like … What??? Who does that? Who has the time for all of that? Are you aware that sometimes people on the internet see something like a video or a photo from somewhere else (also uncredited from twitter, reddit, facebook, etc), and then just post it here on tumblr??

And no, I am not talking about reposting someone’s art or other works

Look, if YOU get your thrills from finding out who/where/when the very first instance of every single cat or dog video came from, that’s great! Do you. Knock yourself out. Have fun. But don’t try to shame others because we aren’t all humorless poindexters like you

If I post something from tiktok, the video generally tells you where to go to see it there. If it’s a tweet or from reddit, again, there are usually twitter or reddit handles in the tweet. And NO, I am not putting a link to every single tweet or reddit thread or facebook post — if that’s that important to you, then figure it out. It’s not hard, and in the year 2023 most adults should have the necessary skills to find an original tweet, if that’s something that’s important to you. I’m not doing it for you, not sorry

(SN: I’ll never forget when I took my first college English literature course, and at the end of the semester I was on the bubble for getting an A or an A+ in the class, and our final exam was a written essay that would decide my final grade. I didn’t quite score the A+ that I wanted, and when I looked over my essay, the professor wrote on it: “Odin, you are the quintessential college freshman, and your inquisitiveness has made this semester one of my most enjoyable.” And after class, I walked up to him and thanked him, and asked him what quintessential meant? He opened his mouth and was about to answer me, but then he smiled, wagged his finger at me and said, “you should learn to look things up.” He was one of my favorite professors (had a British accent, eyeglasses and reminded me of Giles from Buffy), but I’ve never forgotten that lesson. Some of you very obviously need to learn it too)

I’ve also made what are very obviously jokes online, only to have people accuse me of misrepresenting facts—and then I’m like, do I really need to explain the concept of what a joke is to you people??

Like, I could see if it was something racist, trans/homophobic, Islamophobic, antisemitic, etc, BUT I DON’T DO THAT

I think that some people need to be seen as, or have a desire to be known as a gatekeeper, and instead of using just a tiny bit of common sense, they try to make mountains out of molehills to elevate themselves in the eyes of their followers

The people who act this way are truly joyless human beings, and they probably suck all the fun out of parties and other events that people are forced to spend time with them

Maybe try socializing a bit more? Learn to read (online) cues. Don’t be so eager to accuse everyone of doing something wrong just so that YOU get to look like the good guy

And all of that’s without even addressing all of the straight up racist anons that I constantly receive

Like, do people even understand that we aren’t inside of each other’s heads? Sometimes we’re all dealing with life and other stuff. And just maybe people are busy trying to have just a tiny bit of fun, and then the mf fun police come along and try to ruin shit? Because I don’t use a word exactly the same way you do?? Or because of an obvious joke?? You guys who do this kind of shit really SUCK

I feel sorry for you

I almost can’t believe this is the piddling little shit that some people choose to be upset over

Please find some REAL things to be upset over

Try learning to use the feature that lets users (gasp) make a post of their very own! instead of fixating on one goddamn mutha fucking post that wasn’t worded to your liking

I am not here for the discourse with anyone with an internet connection and a keyboard

Please go touch some grass

[kamorth]

I posted 7,191 times in 2022

60 posts created (1%)

7,131 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@vaspider

@wee-lightning-bug

@reinelefey

@wilwheaton

@cyanwrites

I tagged 564 of my posts in 2022

#@markaleb - 14 posts

#i mean - 4 posts

#as in - 3 posts

#yep - 3 posts

#also also - 3 posts

#also - 3 posts

#it always means something different - 2 posts

#so just the fact that you are aware that you chose this person - 2 posts

#because i kept embarrassing the boys in woodworking and metalworking - 2 posts

#i love how you can see how hard he's jazz-handing even though it's a still image - 2 posts

Longest Tag: 137 characters

#i think the rise of this kind of thinking is in part a combination of tl;dr internet culture and the rapidly increasing numbers of people

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Okay to be clear I am getting nothing out of this, the seller doesn't know I'm making this post, this is purely me gushing about awesome customer service for an awesome product.

So when the fire happened (almost 2 years ago it does NOT feel that long) one of the things I lost was my collection of playing cards. I cried over these ones specifically. I backed the Kickstarter (technically my FiL bought them as a gift for me but it was all on my accounts) waaaaaaaaaaay back in the before times in the far distant good old days of 2014 and got two packs. I kept one sealed (for collector points or maybe in case the others got damaged lol) and opened the other and instantly fell in love with them. They are GORGEOUS and they feel AMAZING and they were hands down my favourite cards ever. I had them sitting on my desk next to my computer and I would sometimes shuffle them while waiting for things to load just because they felt that nice. I still reach for them sometimes.

About a year ago I set up an ebay search alert for them. I wanted them back and my only chance (I thought) was to grab them quickly if a fellow collector put them up for sale. No hits. Not even one. Fast forward to a few weeks ago and I thought fuck it, let's try a hail mary, can't be any worse than a "sorry they're gone", right? So I go and message the seller on the original KS campaign. They haven't had any campaigns recently so chances are it's a dead account, so okay maybe the best I can hope for is silence but I have to try.

15 minutes later I get a reply. "Sorry you went through that, I still have a few unsold packs though. Let me go put them up on Etsy". Half an hour after that I get another response which includes the above link along with "I'm just looking to have shipping costs covered, you don't have to pay for the cards".

Two packs just arrived in the mail and I'm crying. I thought they were gone. I feel like a complete idiot, crying over playing cards, but they represent something that feels like getting my life back finally.

If you like playing cards, nice art, or just generally gothy things, do everyone involved a favour and grab yourself a pack. They are SO worth it.

8 notes - Posted January 5, 2022

#4

Getting more than a little bit sick of people not understanding even the slightest nuance.

Queer/Dyke/Fag/Homo have historically been and are still sometimes, often even, used as derogatory slurs. So have all the other words we use for ourselves.

THAT'S BECAUSE THE PEOPLE WHO WANT US TO STOP EXISTING SEE ANYTHING THAT DESCRIBES US AS AN INSULT SO THAT'S HOW THEY USE IT.

EVERY WORD WE COME UP WITH TO DESCRIBE OURSELVES WILL BECOME A SLUR AS LONG AS BIGOTS GET TO DICTATE LANGUAGE USE.

Learn to read fucking context clues and STOP ATTACKING PEOPLE WHO ARE USING THOSE WORDS AS DESCRIPTORS FOR THE RELEVANT EXPERIENCES. All you do when you ONLY police people who are using those words as something other than a personal attack is HELPING THE BIGOTS WIN. You are doing the work of the enemy! BIGOTS ARE OUR ENEMIES, NOT PEOPLE WHO JUST WANT TO TALK ABOUT QUEER EXPERIENCES AS BEING QUEER.

I am SO over this bullshit.

Is the person you're having a go at using our words as a personal attack? Let's look at some examples:

"I'm taking Queer History this semester" - if you think there is a slur in this sentence you need a much stronger reading comprehension lesson than I'm about to give you.

"WE'RE HERE. WE'RE QUEER. GET USED TO IT" - YES I AM THAT THING YOU TRIED TO CALL ME AS AN INSULT AND I'M NOT INSULTED BY IT WHAT ELSE YOU GOT?

"I hope someone fag-drags you you gross fucking dyke" - This statement in itself being said to an individual is legally a hate crime in many countries

"You're just a fucking queer fag go suck a cock" - I need more context because there is FUCKING NUANCE HERE AND INTENT MATTERS. I've said this to a grumpy gay friend who just needed to go get laid before and in that context it was loving advice (and his mood improved SO MUCH because I was right, as I often am), but I can see how it could be used in a derogatory way.

MY POINT IS

CONTEXT AND INTENT FUCKING MATTER

13 notes - Posted July 30, 2022

#3

This reminds me of something

Can't QUITE put my finger on what it is though

15 notes - Posted June 11, 2022

#2

101 notes - Posted February 1, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

My kid works at the lotto booth in a supermarket that happens to be a favourite of boomers and upper-middle class white people - the kind of people we've been seeing at anti-listening-to-doctors protests around here. He gets at least 3-4 people per shift going off at him for wearing a mask and I've been trying to convince him to quit for a while now. Last week some dude spat at him.

It's probably unrelated but we've both tested positive for covid in the last 72 hours. We're triple vaxxed. He seems to be getting off lucky, nothing more than a stuffy nose which is good. I, however, would like to die now please. I have a fever and have been shivering so hard I think I've pulled a muscle in my chest. I'm really hoping it doesn't get worse. Like I don't need a hospital but I'm really hoping it stays that way.

Also, someone in the house has a surgery booked on Friday and they've already taken 6 weeks off work for recovering. Fingers crossed for that person not testing positive.

If you're an antivaxxer, fuck you. This is absolutely your fault.

2,428 notes - Posted May 17, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[bassistrosetta-blog]

I may be mean, but I DO have empathy and sympathy.

Well, it's 5 in the morning and I'm wide awake. I was told not to respond to all the mean things people said about me on the internet, especially when I'm in an angry frame of mind, well I didn't listen. And it didn't make me feel any better. I erased them eventually. Now that I am in a calm state of mind and I've been taking my meds dilegently, I think I can explain my feelings without anyone getting too offended. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. I can't force you to agree, but fact is this is how I feel. Sorry.

I deleted my Facebook recently. Writing my thoughts impulsively or when I am triggered was pretty much always a habit, starting with my Xanga in like 2005. It comes from extreme anger, dispair, desperation and just crying for help. I recently got kicked out of my band because of this habit. It reminded me that not many people like me and it's mainly because of my posts. People think they know me just because they read my posts, but they're wrong. So wrong. Then they think they have the right to spread rumors about how I am a terrible person. It happens so much I actually believe people when they call me a bitch, an asshole, an attention whore, trash and just an overall shitty person. Just because of my posts, especially the mean ones. I FUCKING HATE IT when people say it's not my bipolar disorder, I am just being an asshole. Well I'll tell you all that I take full responsibility for my actions and live with the consequences once I realize I'm wrong. Ask my family and my boyfriend. I can be an asshole when I'm manic, depressed or feeling normal, so I'm not gonna blame the blasting people on facebook on my bipolar disorder. I get psycho sometimes. Idk. But you all come off judging me like you have a PhD or something. NO ONE can tell me I'm being an asshole and it's not caused by my bipolar except for my psychiatrist and maybe my counselor. Not you.

Yes, I regret my posts that either blast people out of anger or expose my desperation and dispair. I'll admit it, I fucked up time after time. Consqeuently, I am embarrassed, humiliated and my sorrys don't mean anything anymore because people experience my bullshit all the time. My sincere apologies are outdated and I get it. These are the consequences.

I am envious, I am angry, I am insecure, then I'm cocky, I'm no role model. I don't want people to believe that what I do is okay. I take my own risk when I post what I am feeling, but I should write a book, not put it on facebook. People don't care and when they do it bothers them I guess because mental health is a touchy subject. On rare occasions, I have someone message me saying thank you for posting how I feel because they are reminded they're not alone. That makes me feel good. Imagine if I wrote a book instead? 😌

As for putting people on blast. I will carry that burden for years to come. I dug my own grave. My reputation is kind of screwed up here in the valley. Either people don't care or people are talking shit about me left and right. I'm aware. I sometimes get episodes of paranoia because of it. I go to a gig and I cant tell who hates me and who's against me. Who read my posts and who didn't. I carry a knife with me because I feel like people are out to get me. I'm always peaking out the window and making sure my cutians are shut. The anxiety is horrible. I wouldn't wish it upon anybody, not even the people I've blasted. So yes, I do suffer as a result of my actions because I have some empathy and some sympathy. I am not a sociopath. I have empathy towards people with mental illness. I have sympathy when I am not angry toward those I've hurt. I am sorry, but like I said, apologies mean nothing now. You could say what I've done is unforgivable. I understand the error of my actions. I asked a past psychiatrist (cause I've had many) if I have borderline personality disorder instead but after much evaluation, she insisted I have bipolar disorder 1, not a personality disorder. This means I have some control over my actions so people should not feel sorry for me. Bipolar is treatable and my 6 medications are working just fine for me rn. I'd like to try cbd oil one day though. 🤔

I am currently seeing a counselor about my anger issues. I'm working to improve myself now that I'm aware of my errors. I started out by deleting my Facebook, but I still blast a little on instagram but not as much I think. Idk. I will have to fix that. I want to be a way better person, mostly for my music career, my family and myself. If I fix it, I'll be happier. And who doesn't want to be happy? 🥰

Thanks for reading

Ileana xo💋