#I'm allowed to drive!!!!
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I PASSED MY DRIVER'S EXAM!!!!!! :D
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Off my head on laudanum, not responsible for my actions.
Good Omens S2/Ep3
#aziraphale keep it together#this gif set is driving me insane look at them who allowed this#so i'm sharing it with all of you haha#good omens#good omens s2#good omens 2#ineffable husbands#aziracrow#i know where i'm going#the resurrectionists#good omens 1827#good lord they are about to jump each other#gomens#a duck gifs#gif set#good omens gifs#goodomensgifs#goodomensedit
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Poor Neo- "Wait a Second...."
#I thought I was the problem and at fault initially#and thought I needed to be better#be more. You can't make someone cheat though#certainly not saying I was perfect#I'm sure I had my quirks. It's just interesting to me how things played out#:D now i struggle not knowing if I'm overbearing and gonna drive people away!#i shouldn't feel guilty for sharing what happened to me#but i still do. this happened to me and i should be allowed to share it!#also this is NOT about “”being poly=cheating“”#I ASKED about poly relationships. THEY didnt like poly. i said ok. THEY cheated. they wanted monogamy and cheated.#very annoyed how many people commented on my art saying how their partner cheated on them and wanted poly#or saying shit bad about poly#THIS IS ABOUT CHEATERS GONNA CHEAT#i only included the poly thing because it was a connection i made that i thought was particular#furry#digital art#neo#digital drawing#drawing#furry art
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please send me good komaeda luck for my fourth road test tomorrow. hopefully no buses or trucks driving 40 mph in a residential neighborhood will appear in the first 3 seconds this time. I might even get an instructor with a bearable personality if I'm super lucky
#my journey to get a driver's license has broken me#it is just a slab of plastic that says I'm allowed to drive by myself. that's ALL!!!! and for what. deep psychological trauma#random stuff
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some doodles for @sunnyys-jarss roommate au that were done over the course of the month...
(if you see inconsistencies in art style or mistakes hush no you don't these were done over the course of several different lunch breaks-)
edit: I WAS GONNA POST THIS NEXT WEEK BUT THIS IS FOR THE LOVELY FANART THEY MADE ME SO- aherm
anyways
(hush they're watchin a movie)
anyways yea just a couple quick things cuz their au is great! if you haven't checked it out already do so, they've got a cool ask blog at @ask-the-atwr-au!
#crappy doodles#not my au#ahaha#these are really badly done sorry#as you can see i did nothing about backgrounds or shoes because i was tired and details are always inconsistent with me#but anyways yea here's the guys for ya!#sorry if they came out a lil wonky i'm still tryna figure out how to draw them#(the way i drew ruin in the second one doesn't sit right with me...)#(and i know it's probably not cannon but i just like drawing sun looking absolutely dead and eclipse just LIVID)#(pov you weren't allowed to drive to the store and the driver is abt to crash into a tree or smthn)#anyways uhh#yea!
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Today I decided to be brave and try and sketch out how I imagine the motorcycles would look for the Cyberknights AU
Putting a horse head on a bike was harder than I thought it would... but for the literal first time drawing one, I think I did alright
Also redesigned Gaz because I hated his previous one, now he looks much cooler (and there's more emphasis on the Aether tech he uses as an Aether expert)
#call of duty modern warfare 2#cod mw2#cod soap#cod gaz#john soap mactavish#kyle gaz garrick#cyberknights au#cod zombies#cod mwz#cod fanart#the horse head would go down like in the top sketch when driving in full speed#and the suspension allows some limited jumping (probably not as much as a real horse)#also they're fucking huge as you can tell by comparison to Soap#each member will have a slightly different bike but I'm not feeling like designing them all today#tried looking for references but unfortunately it seems like not many ppl put horse heads on their bikes...#also yeah they drive with reins like a fuckin horse its a little silly but I like it lol#thanks for everyone that showed interest in this au! I like worldbuilding for it#I have many thoughts about G.H.O.S.T. especially... but alas
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If nobody got me I know gege got me because that drawing of Yuuji and Sukuna dancing will carry me through my shift tonight amen
#Praying because I'm having such an awful fucking day#I'm not allowed to drive my car. I'm an hour early at my workplace and I can't stop crying#I'm stressing out and hungry. Fuck#Sukuita dancing save me. Sukuita dancing. Save me sukuita dancing
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i'm kinda obsessed with the way juan/lucrezia's dynamic flip flops throughout the show like in the first half you'd get a soft dynamic where lucrezia rides her horse in the middle of a battlefield worried sick about juan who was willing to die but backs up because he doesn't wanna cause his sister grief if he died then the second half you'd have lucrezia wrapping her arms around juan's arm smiling and cracking jokes then later at the same day they're spiting out each other, giving each other stink eye with a full antagonistic tension then later he goes back from spain going all cute on her like omg sister look i brought you a beautiful rare panther in a heart-shaped gilded cage 🥺 then later when he became frustrated that she refuses to reconcile with him and recognize all his efforts (misguided or not) are rooted to protect her he spitefully teases her with dropping her baby from the balcony....their uwu/toxicity managed to coexist because they contain multitudes lol
#they drive me insane sorryyyy#the fact his eyes were sooo glassy even when he was hurting her in their last scene because hurting her = hurting himself#it's such a rich dynamic honestly like imagine the power of they gave them more screentime and exploration...we've been robbed!!#they're so underrated and for what they have so much material like i'm having a ball talking about them#his childishness and pride would never allow him to admit his wrongs even when he's sepf aware that he is....sick#lucrezia borgia#juan borgia#the borgias#the borgias meta#juan x lucrezia#text post
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Not sure if there's anything official- based only on a vaguely similar shape and location and seemingly supported by the map pictures released by Dreamworks TV recently, would Yaz's island be Frank Island in Yellowstone National Park? Only for JWE2 building reference purposes 😁
It's possible it was used for some visual inspiration, but I think the EXACT location in Wyoming was probably meant to be a little vague, as a fictional location.
#jurassic world chaos theory#I didn't even know what part of Wyoming it was supposed to be exactly until DW released those maps#the only locations I knew for sure were Darius's cabin in the Lake Tahoe area#Sammy's ranch in the Texas hill country area#Brooklynn's apartment was originally supposed to be near Denver I think or at least at one point I was told Denver#because I actually picked the location of the drop off point in Oklahoma on the map and I tried to calculate a spot they could reach in tim#and then the last location I knew vaguely was the port somewhere off the coast of Louisiana haha#jurassic world#chaos theory#jwct#ask#it's usually better not to get too specific with fictional locations unless they're like... landmarks that everyone knows#also as a Texan I can't believe Sammy allowed Ben to take the I 10 all the way down the wrong way to San Antonio#And THEN the I-35 through Dallas and Norman on the way to Colorado#not only is that the long way#but it's also a truly AWFUL drive during rush traffic LOL#the correct route would have been to take highway 83 out of Junction and then make your way up to Amarillo and onward#Anyway this is just to say whoever put together the DW maps probably just used major interstates to loosely locate things#i'm not convinced they're 100% accurate
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not enough words in the English language to explain how much I need him right this second
#COME TO MY ARMS BELOVED#let us put all other joys to shame#do you ever lose it because maximus is not only the most honorable kind intelligent devoted man of all time but also the most handsome???#like it's not enough that he's good and noble#he's also got a face and body sculpted by the gods above???#on the day maximus was born the gods spent hours debating over how perfect one human being was allowed to be#and in the end they decided he could be as perfect as possible#just so i could suffer!!! with not having him!!!!#his shoulder looks so biteable here#just give me a little chomp please#and by chomp i mean let me fall on my knees and kiss it repeatedly for hours#he looks SO GOOD in this armor#he always looks flawless but something about this armor#the blue tunic with the dark leather straps#that buckle is driving me crazy#thinking about slowly taking that armor off piece by piece until it's vaguely scattered across my bedroom floor#this would be an unflattering angle for some people but SIKE maximus has no unflattering angles#love the resolved look on his face like “no one talk to me i'm in the zone”#i'll tell him what zone he can get in if he wants ANYTIME#just!!! let me have him please!!!#just let me hold his sweet face and rest my head on his shoulder and fall asleep in his arms#let me spend my whole life loving and cherishing him#no one in the movie understood how much a man like this should be treasured like the precious jewel that he is#consider him treasured#every single day all day every moment#treasured and beloved and precious and dear to my heart until the day it stops beating#gladiator#maximus#maximus decimus meridius#gladiator 2000
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pitched battle inside my brain between the part of me that's desperately shaking myself by the shoulders going "YOU HAVE GOT TO ACTUALLY LIVE THE KIND OF LIFE YOU IMAGINE INSTEAD OF JUST SITTING AROUND IMAGINING IT UNTIL YOU DIE!!" and the part of me that's clutching my face going "is this allowed? is this allowed?? is this allowed???"
#trying to plan a solo cicada pilgrimage and getting brainworms about it yeehaw#'making a lot of plans and never actually doing things in real life' has been a problem for literally as long as I can remember#but I also feel like I've developed a learned helplessness over the last several years that's gotten worse as I've gotten older??#me age twenty: I think I'm gonna take myself to chicago next week because I feel like going to the zoo#me age thirty: am I allowed to go camping alone. am I allowed to do a solo road trip. I need a grownup#to be extremely clear I am very much allowed and this is not justin's fault and I don't know where it comes from#like I'll run things by him lowkey seeking 'permission' that I don't even need and he'll be like 'yeah that sounds good to me'#and then I STILL won't do the thing because like. my brain keeps insisting there needs to be a grownup in charge?? HELLO I'M GROWNUP#anyway I'm doing cicada trip solo BECAUSE-- the drive is so long I want to do five days because two of them will just be driving#and he can't get that much time off work right now#AND because I literally only want to Be Camping and Looking At Bugs but he'd get bored of a week of that he likes Activities#me this morning getting insecure and weird: what are your thoughts... on cicada voyage....#him after at first not even understanding the question: I'm SO excited for you?? you deserve to get to go absolutely feral???#I do.... ;n; 💕 why am I so scared to be a person.......#about me#cicada quest
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#The forbidden extra panels that're like ''And misgendering people is a shitty thing to do'' / ''That also makes sense'' before the last two#I'm sorry I'm choosing violence today#Look I'm not saying you have to call him Crocodad specifically or anything#Its just the seeming insistence FROM THE CISHETS to misgender him at every opportunity that just 💢💢💢#Another one is when people speculate about him being trans to begin with but instead of discussing whether or not he's trans#No it's a debate whether or not he's aCtUaLlY a fEmAlE#I swear to god#It's the whole Discussing Gender With Trans People vs Discussing Gender With Cis People-meme#And it drives me up the walls. Please just let me yell for a bit#Just to be clear: This is not a deeply serious post. If it was I wouldn't make it a Spongebob meme for crying out loud#This is simply MY BLOG and I'M ALLOWED TO COMPLAIN HERE#Also I do have to watch people repeatedly misgender him in the tags of MY OWN FANART completely unprompted so y'know.#Like randos pls don't misgender my husband on my posts I am fucking begging of you 😭#Moon posting#OP Meta
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we got ourselves a mains call, lads!
liking this post tells me that you would like to be mains, prioritizing interactions with each other and implying a level of comfortability between us -- basically, neither of us need to be nervous about sending memes, asking to ship, and other such things! not that any of my mutuals need to worry about any of this, but mains especially so. if you are currently listed as a main/affiliate on my pinned, you don't need to like this post! you're stuck with me already <3
in case you're worried about this, you do not have to speak to me regularly to be a main! i'm not always the best with messages anyway :' ) i only ask that we've written together before and kinda have an idea of our muses' dynamic ( doesn't need to be fully developed!! ). if you feel a connection and want it to grow, then i'm all for that!
#slaps this down!!#i will ofc reblog this a few times but i'm gonna tinker on my pinned post in a bit to go ahead and take care of a few edits i need to make#i think i'll stop @ing and just link to each blog though? bc tumblr drives me batty with how it doesn't allow more than so many in one post#get ready to ramble | ooc
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Why does the right constantly believe they are not being idealistic, the world needs to conform to your beliefs for them to work too, things are not going to just turn on a dime because you think you're intellectually superior for not thinking about the impact your changes would have on other people
#both sides drive me up the fucking wall#yes I position myself in the right side of the political spectrum but holy shit#'abolishing the police is a bad idea but we should abolish public schools'#'taxing the rich won't work because they avoid taxes like the plague so let's abolish all taxes and rely on people's generosity instead'#'we have declining birth rates and this is going to destroy the middle class and the military and the elderly but fuck maternity leave'#'employers are increasingly discriminating against women and mothers who need to work to support their families because the middle class is#shrinking but employers should be allowed to discriminate against whoever they want because they can't possibly have existing biases'#there's no quippy way to say it but the right believes gun safety laws can never properly be applied much like the left believes#pro-life laws can never be properly applied therefore restrictions are illogical at best and dangerous at worst#do you guys see what I'm saying here
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Hmmm I do enjoy the large amounts of feral toxic and obsessive violence flavors of durgetash around but its not my preference, like. I crave the 'horrible awful worst people youve ever met are soft for (ONLY) eachother' dynamic. What if, given the opportunity, they really WOULD rule together side by side, and they really do secretly and shamefully yearn for that comfort together. What if they almost indulge in it sometimes. AAAAAAAAAA
I really love the star-crossed lovers, forbidden romance, mutual yearning, tragedy of the only person to ever know you, and even openly like you being a temporary co-conspirator but ultimately your sworn enemy you you know you must kill.
Maybe it's just circumstantial. Maybe in another life you really would have hated him, or worse, had no feeling towards him either way at all, but that's not your reality. Your reality is that he's the ONLY ONE that offers you a painful glimpse of normalcy. Or as close to normal as someone like YOU could get. And it's so tempting (comforting even? Is that comfort?) That you can't ignore it. No matter how much guilt and shame it brings, no matter how much fear you hold towards your Father. You can control your urges, but not this? This feeling, this longing is stronger than even your deepest nature as child of Bhaal, so much so that you can't control it. So you ask for forgiveness instead. With promises that in the end, the result will be the same. You will kill him all the same. He will die at your hand, before only you, yourself.
You justify it this way. To the temple. To Father. To yourself.
Death is the only way this could end anyway. Because could you really go on living the way it was before? Before being known, accepted, liked as you were?
#gortash#bg3#durge#good this isn't even getting into HIS mind about it. but it's just as asdfhhbkvfgjkjfhh to me. very similar form of fucked up comfort.#just a different angle#they are both traumatized your honor. let them find real solace in eachother. even if it's mostly suffocated by fear and guilt#I'm all for knife and blood kinks but i don't think that's like. what they'd WANT the relationship to be#i think it would manifest that way because of how fucked and tense the situation is#but if they somehow both ascended to godhood &were free of their burdens what if they allowed themselves to finally b fully soft w eachothr#durgetash#durges prayer and gortash's creased book are driving me insane. insane. insane. how am i supposed to live like this#to each their own of course btw! i just crave the awful and irideemable being capable of and seen as worth of love and comfort
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sorry for only saying this type of shit lately but i kinda wanna drive a car straight into a brick wall at the highest speed possible
#trying to keep it together so bad because i already know the problems and solutions and whatnot but i cannot do anything#i desperately just need to do something. accomplish any task. actually several would be nice. but i cannot stand just letting life go by#while i watch other people have the things i want. or even metaphorically living my dream like. that should be me why am i settling for thi#i hate even talking about this because i feel so stupid when i know it's not even a real tangible problem and that i actually DO have real#problems to tackle and the ability to do so but i'm choosing to be upset over the stupidest things i could possibly be sad about#and i can't even be sad about it in a normal way i'm cycling through like several different reactions to smth that isn't even real#or if it is real i literally do not have tanglible evidence for it one way or another like i'm driving myself insane for no reason#i can't even get catharsis because all i'm doing is digging a deeper hole for something i never should've gone back into in the first place#because i KNOW how i am i KNOW how i react to things and i still chose to do it lmao.#and i continue to choose to go through this shit instead of actively trying to change my life because... i'm lazy? and stupid? idk#negative self-talk isn't gonna get me to do anything either so let's just say i'm feeling particularly unmotivated like usual#i hated being a teenager but i really do miss when all my problems just amounted to 'someone was mean to me on tumblr today :(' or i failed#a test in chemistry or something. like i yearn for that simplicity becasue at this point all i'm doing is ruining my own life LMAO#i'm too scared to live i'm too scared to die so i just sit here and fantasize that life could be amazing if i wait#and i'll magically get everything i've ever wanted if i just wait long enough. and i know it isn't true and i still wait for it to happen.#because honestly like. i think deep down i am just convinced i will fail at anything i do when that shouldn't be what scares me.#what scares me should be never even allowing myself to fail because i never tried to do anything at all with myself or my life#like. wake the fuck up. get off your ass and put in the effort. learn some skills. gain independence and stability and discipline and do it#just live please i'm begging you just live so i can be happy don't i deserve to be happy... why am i not letting myself be happy#i'm literally keeping myself trapped in this negative feedback loop ON PURPOSE because teehee shiny toy#and it doesn't matter if the love is real it doesn't matter how i feel like i'm just using it as a distraction i can't say it's motivation#because it's barely motivated me at all. i have to start being realistic. 25 & just realizing you actually have to participate in your life#anyways. i've cried i've agonized i've pictured killing myself in 30 different ways. i think the only way i'm gonna feel better is#to just actually try this time without giving up. wish me luck
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