#I'll post more when i get through my commissions Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[matd0]

oughhhh life just beat my ass for like a month straight jfc. had a lot of very not good thingsss happen in my personal life and i haven't been able to do anything productive, so uhh sorry about disappearing </3 i'm on summer break now tho so i hope everything will get better (???) apologies.

anyway uhh have a sketch of jack i did months ago but never posted bc it's kindof lame but i also haven't drawn anything new in weeks (、._. )、

[piningpercussionist]

(ooc)

I want you all to know that if I had the energy for it. There are so many posts stored in my drafts I long to queue... but neglected to preemptively tag, despite knowing I am Like This....

Anyway, there is a slight chance the queue might run out tomorrow unless I can get more responses in there-- I am,, tired,,

[meanbossart]

Pin!

Hi, I'm RJ (Male, 27 years old) I'm a -usually- horror oriented artist and collaborator alongside my partner and better-half @barbatusart, though I'm currently on a Baldur's Gate 3/DnD streak with both my art and writing, specifically centered around the Dark Urge I created for my campaign and his antics, so that's most of what you will find here!

I want to leave a warning right here that I occasionally venture into delicate topics in regards to character lore and history - though none of it strays too far from what the game already delves into and I try to give a heads-up ahead of time whenever I feel like something might catch someone off-guard otherwise.

PATREON WHERE I POST WIPS, SKETCHES, UNRELEASED ART, ALL OF MY NSFW CONTENT, ETC : patreon.com/meanbossart/

BLUESKY WHERE I PUT UP FULL VERSIONS OF *SOME* OF THE NSFW THAT I CAN'T POST HERE: bsky.app/profile/meanbossart.bsky.social

TWITCH WHERE I STREAM SOMETIMES: twitch.tv/meanboss14

PSA: I get a lot of asks and I'm slow to go through them, please don't take it personally :U

Anyway, here's the guy of the hour:

🚨FAQ BELOW🚨

Q: Does your Durge have a name? A: Nope! I named him "drow" when I played the game because I didn't feel like thinking up anything special. His lack of a name has become part of the character's lore and you will find him to always be tagged with "DU drow", or referred to as The Drow or just Drow.

Q: Where can I read your BG3 fan-fiction? And what is it about? A: Right here! The main plot follows DU Drow, Astarion, and Shadowheart on a new adventure that fractures into a couple of different directions, but mainly focuses on the aftermath of the spawn that Astarion has released and the personal development of the main cast, alongside a number of original characters that get involved in the narrative. My goal was to create a kind of "DLC" experience, so you can expect a lot of themes that parallel the main game.

Q: Can I draw one of your characters, a scene from your story, or any of your characters interacting with mine/other characters? And can it be NSFW in nature? A: YOU ABSOLUTELY CAN, AND I'LL BE DELIGHTED TO SEE IT IF YOU CARE TO SHARE. I'm equally fine with NSFW as long as everyone involved (in the art and otherwise) is an adult.

Q: What drawing software/tablet/brushes do you use? A: I draw on a Wacom Cintiq 22, using Clip Studio Pro. I switch around brushes quite often but most of what I use comes from the DAUB super-bundle by Paolo Limoncelli.

Q: Where can I find more of your work? A: You can find mine and my partner's comics here, but please bear in mind that most of it is highly violent stuff and you should read the content warnings on the store page carefully before making any purchases - if in doubt of whether or not any of it could be detrimental to your mental health, DON'T BUY IT. Stay safe!

Q: Do you take commissions? A: I am not currently taking any new commission inquiries, sorry!

[dwcmarshalarts]

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT

I'll keep it concise, folks.

Six years ago, I started doing furry art and posted it on a certain birdsite. That's where I grew my following, and for a long while, it's been okay. I cultivated an audience, and at present, it's my largest social platform.

I don't think I need to tell anyone that it's become an ugly and awful site to use. And while there's every reason to get off that site, I simply cannot because my full time profession of working on commissions is heavily dependent on the kind of outreach through that site from regulars, etc.

So folks, I will be trying to get more active here outside of the usually scheduled 2-3 times a week. Though if you really want to support me and my work, I would really appreciate it folks also entertained commissioning me here as well as finding my work on other socials.

Examples of my work below, I'll keep folks updated on when to expect the sign-up form for the next couple months soon. Thank you.

[endivinity]

Hey yall!

it's been one of those weeks. a very, very expensive week. my savings will be completely wiped, but I can't open commissions, so it's not looking too hot for me right now. I'm not in any danger of eviction or other major consequences, but I can't front the costs by myself.

If you'd like to help out by chipping in a little bit, I've got the tl;dr over here! https://ko-fi.com/endivinity There's a pack of every public deathclaw artwork available through that as well, if you'd like a bonus incentive.

Long version and plan of attack under the cut!

I've been medically unemployed for a couple of years now. I've also been recently diagnosed with ADHD - inattentive. I was given an initial trial course of meds for them, which so far aren't working in any helpful ways. NZ has free prescriptions... but it does not have free mental health diagnoses, and especially not for adults. The initial diagnosis appointments cost me $1100, and there are at-cost followup appointments and other medical related costs that are chipping away at it. My medication will need reviewing and possibly switching, which requires more at-cost appointments. This was fine for me to pay! But. Miraculously, I barely self-medicated prior to diagnosis but when I did.... it was with sugary foods. I'm sure you can see where this ends up :'D

The other day I got hit with a dental bill that was not only staggering, but the treatment itself was a gutpunch. I'm not quite at root canal level but two of my teeth are tending towards it, even as the dentist commended my brushing and flossing. The quote is between $3200-4000 (give or take a couple non-priority preventative treatments). I can get government funding assistance up to $1000, and anything beyond that is a loan.

And unrelated I NEED new glasses, because the vision in my left eye from uveitis has deteriorated significantly. this costs less at i think $200-300, but the government does NOT assist with this for... some reason??

The plan of attack:

I'd - hoped, that the meds would let me focus more on owed work. I'd hoped I'd be able to clear the board. That's not the case right now. I'll keep trying, but for now I have to focus on the present.

So, the Ko-fi page is open! There's PWYW files of every deathclaw art I have, so if you'd like to help me out and get convenient lizards instead of browsing my posts, that's the option for you. I will also be making deathclaw designs to auction. I'd like to do customs in future because there's a hungry hungry market out there, waiting for me to do so, but that'd be a commission and I wouldn't complete it. So, premades it will be. My Inprnt store is currently barren; I will see about getting it filled. That'll be linked later. I can't mail out my print stock I use for cons, because I don't have a car or easy access to shipping packaging for larger prints. (And shipping would be immense because, NZ)

So far those are my only attainable options. If you have other suggestions though, please let me know! <3

[twistedwonderlandshenanigans]

I Need Help (Emergency Writing Commissions)

I hate asking for help, and I know a lot of my readers are minors and may not be able to.

My student loans haven't come in, and I've been picking up shifts whenever I can, but it's not enough. One of my roommates that I moved into a new place with left, and even though her name is on the lease, she didn't sign it so she's really not obligated to pay, from my understanding.

If I pay my normal rent amount, I will have less than $5 in my bank account to live off of for the next 2 weeks until my paycheck comes in.

I haven't even really been eating, I drink coffee to make it through a day and sleep off hunger when I can, I haven't been grocery shopping in almost 3 months.

My other roommate said she can get her parents to help with covering the additional cost, but obviously I don't want it to all fall to her as she's in a similar position.

I would ask my parents, but we are not on good terms at the moment.

I can't do much more than ask for help at this point.

Commission Info

I will be writing for Obey Me and for TWST

$5 - Short headcanons post either to worldbuild, x reader, or x another character. Every other character will add another $3. (EX. "Boyfriend headcanons Ace x reader" is $5, adding Deuce would make it $8)

$8 - Scenario/drabble either, x reader, (that is OLD writing, I promise I've improved), x another character, or as a one shot. Please specify what genre you want it to be. (EX. "Going skiing with Jack, platonic fluff" or "Yandere Asmodeus, self-reflection themed, angst/horror")

$15 - I'll worldbuild an au of your choice given a trope or relationship you'd like to explore. (EX. Coffeeshop AU, enemies to lovers) or if you'd prefer headcanons per character. For $15 I'll write about 3 characters that you either request or you allow me to choose. If you want a post like this one, with worldbuilding, every character, etc., DM me so we can figure out details. Limits: I write a lot of dead dove and angst, neither of those bother me all that much, but I do have the right to reject/refund a commission if I don't feel comfortable writing it.

If you are interested in NSFW content, please DM me so I can confirm you are not a minor, and then I can send you examples from my Obey Me blog. Payment: While donations are appreciated, half of the payment for a commission that is more than $10 can be paid before, and the other half will be transferred after. For anything less than $10, you will have your piece before the end of the day.

I'm so sorry, I feel incredibly guilty for asking for help, but if you can, here's

My p*ypal

Or if etransfer is easier (Canada) you can dm me for my email.

Every dollar helps.

Thank you, and please reblog if possible.

[writingquestionsanswered]

IDK how many people are running the account, but if you or a member of the team running the account has ADHD, do you have any tips for ADHD writers, particularly when trying to get WIPs done? Outlines don't work for me like 99% of the time ;_;

Tips for Writing with ADHD

Here's what works for me, but your mileage may vary...

1 - Know What Outline Works for You - You say outlines don't work for you 90% of the time, but what type of outline are you using? Many people hear the word "outline" and imagine an academic outline with roman numerals and bullet points, but that's not what most fiction writers mean when they talk about using an outline. For fiction writers, outlines can be anything from a beginning to end written summary, to a scene list, to a detailed timeline. My post How to Outline a Plot has some different things you can try. Ultimately, there's no right or wrong way to outline your story. Anything that works as a "road map" to guide you through your story can help.

2 - Pants When You've Got to Pants - Some writers are "pantsers" or in other words, they prefer not to go off an outline. Some don't even plan in advance. They "write by the seat of their pants" and let the story take them where it may. For some writers, it depends on the specific story they're working on. Some stories might require planning, others might work better if you pants them. What works for me is understanding my needs (what type of story I'll usually need to plan/outline ahead of time, and what type of story I can pants) and then planning/pantsing accordingly. If I spent time outlining a story that I could easily pants, it would definitely take the wind out of my writing sails.

3 - Schedule Your Writing Time... Sort Of... - For me, I can't just rely on myself to write when the mood strikes me. If I did that, I'd never get any writing done. So for me, it's important to have a dedicated writing time each day. That doesn't even have to mean my butt's in the chair writing from this time to this time, it just means I'll do my best to write during whatever span of time. So, let's say this week you're home every day from 2pm until 6pm and some of that time is free time. That's going to be a good time to write, so you could say you're going to sit down every day at 3pm to write. Or, you could do 10-minute writing springs every hour, or every other hour. Or you could say you'll write when the mood strikes you, but definitely from 5:30 to 6 if you didn't get it done earlier.

4 - Try Random Writing Sprints - Writing sprints in general can be a good way for people with ADHD to write. You can schedule them or you could do them when the mood strikes. Get a timer and set it to whatever works for you... 5-minutes, 10-minutes, 30-minutes, whatever. Then just set it and go when you have time. Even if you don't feel like writing, getting into that habit will make it easier to write as soon as the timer comes out.

5 - Don't Give Yourself a Hard Time - One of the most profound things I ever heard about writing resistance is that it's often the product of writing feeling stressful. In other words, the idea of writing causes you stress, so your brain says, "Avoid! Avoid!" and you sit down to write and nothing happens. One of the ways we make writing stressful for ourselves is by giving ourselves a hard time when we don't write or don't write as much as we wanted. So, just do the best you can and congratulate yourself on small victories. Find ways to make writing fun and relaxing rather than stressful and like a chore.

Bonus - Sometimes the problem isn't ADHD but something else. My post 5 Reasons You Lost Interest in Your WIP, Plus Fixes! has some other things to consider.

I hope that helps!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

LEARN MORE about WQA

VISIT MY Master List of Top Posts

COFFEE & COMMISSIONS ko-fi.com/wqa

[yandereworlds]

「 INDEX + INTRODUCTION 」

˚₊‧🔪WELCOME TO MY YANDERE BLOG! I mainly make content for my own original characters and occasionally, fandom related stuff. This blog is strictly 16+ and run by two people.

My name is Kiki (She/Her) and I am 18+. I’m the one that mainly provides the art and bots that you’ll find throughout this blog and sometimes, I write headcanons/imagines as well. My writer is Rose (She/Her, 18+) and she’s responsible for writing the fanfictions and some of the drabbles. To make it easy for you to know who's behind each post, you'll see either 'Mun Kiki', 'Mun Rose', or both credited in the tags.

We started this blog because we had numerous ideas for yandere characters. Given my background as an artist and Rose's talent as a writer, it seemed like a natural fit. I'm primarily creating this post to serve as a guide for navigating the blog. I've received numerous asks about accessing the characters' backgrounds, information, as well as questions regarding my bots, projects, commissions, socials, and other related topics. You can use this post as a reference FAQ or as a comprehensive guide to streamline your experience on the blog. 

Find that you enjoy our work? Consider leaving a tip, it’s greatly appreciated and helps the blog. Also, if you’d like to be able to be more involved with our creative process and engage with the community, you can join our Discord server here. 

╰┈➤ ASK RULES - OPEN!

✦ Absolutely no NSFW asks. This blog is 16+ for a reason, so obviously, we will be trashing asks related to sexual topics. 

✦ We’re allowed not to answer certain asks. If you’ve been spamming the same ask and we haven’t responded to it for months, it’s most likely because we aren't comfortable doing so OR we’ve already answered an ask similar to yours.

✦ We will not be answering any asks regarding self-harm, eating disorders, extreme gore, noncon or any topics that could be associated with them. 

✦ Finally, we kindly request your patience. We understand that it may take some time to address each individual ask, as we both have busy lives and there may be periods when we don't post asks for weeks. Please refrain from rushing us, and rest assured, we will eventually get to your ask. 

╰┈➤ YANDERE MASTERLISTS 

Original Yandere Masterlist

Fandom Yandere Masterlist

╰┈➤ CHARACTER AI + JANITOR AI

If you've been following this account for some time, you're likely aware that I frequently share my character bots here. I've received numerous asks about which bots are available and where to find them online. While I plan to compile a list of my bots soon, for now, I'll provide links to both of my accounts for future reference.

It's worth noting that I'm currently on a temporary hiatus from Character AI due to site complications. Consequently, most of my recent bots can be found on Janitor AI, where I'm more active. Before visiting either site, please be aware that Janitor AI is intended for users aged 18 and above, whereas Character AI caters to a younger audience. In other words, minors stay off JanitorAI!

My Character AI profile - 1, 2, 3, 4

My Janitor AI profile (18+) - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Wish to request a bot from me? You can find the information here.

╰┈➤ ART COMMISSION INFO - OPEN

Pretty self explanatory. If you're interested in commissioning artwork from me, simply click the link to access my commission page. Currently, I'm accepting payments through both PayPal and Cashapp. Below is a brief FAQ regarding my commissions. Should you have any further questions, don't hesitate to contact me!

Can you draw my OC with your characters?

✦ Yes, absolutely! Just provide me a reference and what you'd like specifically. We can discuss all the details in DM's.

Can you draw a character from 'this fandom' for me?

✦ I'm completely fine with drawing fandom related content. The only fandoms I will not draw under any circumstance is youtubers, Your Boyfriend, Country Humans, BTD and Killing Stalking. Otherwise, I'm open to whatever.

Can you draw a comic for me?

✦ Yes, but only short comics. You can let me know what you'd like the short comic to be about and all that fun stuff. Just know comics from me will likely be around $20-$40+ dollars depending how detailed and complex you'd like it to be.

[goatpaste]

Alrighty, this has been something I'v been putting off for awhile because I really just wanted to save all the money myself but I just dont think its gonna be able to happen anytime soon and I'm tired of putting it off for Daisy's sake

but this is officially the Donation Post for us to start pooling together money to move daisy up from Texas to Pennsylvania. I'll bore you with the details under the cut but in the mean time here is links and info on the ways you can support the move!

[My commissions are Open] [My Etsy is Open]

[My Kofi were i offer PWYW commissions as low at 3$]

[My Toyhouse has designs for sale on it]

[You can Donate here and all the saving made toward this will be going directly into savings]

These are all the ways you can directly support us and help us work toward the goal of getting Daisy into a safe and better environment! I know not everyone is going to be able to chip in but anything helps even reblogs and sharing around! We've been talking about this move for over a year and I want to try and move her by the end of this year at the latest.

For more info on our specific situation and bit more details, please read under the cut

Daisy has been my friend since we were 6 years old, she is like a sister to me! We've been at each others side through thick and thin and I care about her so much.

Daisy's home life has never been the best and her parents are nightmare people who are a blight on the general public but as well as Daisy's home life.

Daisy doesnt have the ability to drive, work or save her own money even when she did work as her mother would take the money she earned constantly, and was ultimately the reason Daisy was unable to keep her job.

So for Daisy's end she has no ability to save and moving funds, it will primarily be on me to round up the money.

We are not 100% sure how much we are going to need at this moment in time but have a rough estiment.

Were hoping to get Daisy's mother on a good mood and have her pay for Daisy's plane ticket. We are going to be unable to move all her stuff and will just have to pack as much as she can into a large suitcase and fly up. So we will not have to pay for the plane, but will have to pay for bedding, and everything else she will need once up here. we have some temporary arrangements Via my bed and couch and potentially picking up a blow up mattress. But my current apartment is extremely small and not much room for two people let alone just me. Not sure how long I will be in this space while Daisy is up here if at all.

I may potentially reach out to my step father and ask him to dip into the savings he has kept for me to get Daisy furniture and necessities. But im avoiding that for as much as i can as im not on the best terms with my dad.

I will start looking for a bigger place for us to live together once we start getting in a comfortable area on savings. As the only money maker currently i will be needing savings to afford a place for us to share that will of course be much more expensive than where i am right now. Daisy will start looking for a job once she is/has moved up here and hopefully we will be able to support ourselves at that point, it will just be the first little bit of time we will need a cushion.

this is one of the areas im not 100% sure how much were going to need but certain in the thousands area knowing rent for a place big enough for two individuals.

after that its just gonna be us figuring it out.

but this is the situation as it stands right now, we are trying to help a trans woman out of her shitty living situation and across the country where her friends who love and care and want to support her are. We dont know exactly how much its going to be, but its going to be a lot and were really just looking for a bit of support!

thank yall so much!

[roxxyhoney]

Okay so this post may initially come off as corny to some, but I just had to make a birthday related IWTV post. Today is my birthday, and it's the first one I've celebrated being apart of the fandom. I started watching the show in March of this year and I don't think I'm the only one who feels like their life has completely changed😅. Without a doubt, IWTV is the best series I've ever seen and that's coming from someone who has watched many many shows and has had some obsessions here and there back in the day. From Buffy, to TVD (give or take a season), GOT (years after it ended), and so many more, but IWTV hits me on a whole different level that I could have never imagined.

When the show came out in 2022, I'll admit I didn't give it a chance like I should have, and apart of me is grateful that I didn't, because I don't know how you all survived the year & half hiatus. I almost didn't survive waiting only TWO months for the new season, so I can only imagine how it felt to wait even longer.

If you follow my blog or have seen a random post from me, it's no secret that I am a huge Loustat fan and I have such a tremendous soft spot for Jam. (I've spent an embarrassingly long time watching interviews and clips of them, and I can't get enough). Jacob Anderson and Sam Reid are both incredible and amazing at what they do. I absolutely can't wait for season 3 and all it has to offer. Ready to see some promotional images, videos, trailers, cast announcements, etc.

What's been getting me through this hiatus has been a lot of phenomenal things. Many people in this fandom have been wonderful and have provided great information and interesting theories (some I'm hoping play out). No, I haven't read the books but I do know quite a bit about what goes on and that's thanks to a lot of research and the many people in this fandom.

Sometimes the fandom can be on one and things can get crazy, but for the most part it's been a real treat getting to experience this show with those who love it just as much. From the fanfiction that is now apart of my daily read, to the fan videos, and definitely to the beautiful artwork from the most talented people out there (I think I have a redbubble problem with as much merch I have purchased). It's all just been a real mind-blowing experience, and I've pretty much "fallen into a well with no bottom."

And let's not forget the most amazing cast, show runners, writers, directors, etc. Yes, I absolutely LOVE Jam, but the whole entire cast was made for this show and their acting is astounding. I would love to meet them in real life one day as I've heard nothing but great things.

So, moral of this novel of a post, and if you've stuck with it this far, is I just wanted to say how much I desperately love the show and the talent that this fandom has showcased.

Not only that, I've met one of my dearest friends from this fandom. You know who you are♥️♥️♥️ And words aren't enough to express how much your friendship means to me.

So, I wanted to list below just a few things from myself and others.

If you read fanfiction and you're interested in an au/human loustat, check out my first fic in the fandom: "it's like a best friend, but more." So far, there are only 15 chapters with 5 left to go.

For more of my favorite fics, I've created a fic rec list. This list will be updated throughout.

I have a new loustat video posted. Check it out if you're interested.

A huge shout out to @haflacky for creating this beautiful loustat commission piece. I am still in awe and super grateful.

And if you want to follow me on twitter/x, youtube, and tiktok feel free 🥰

I'm staying lowkey this birthday and spending the rest of the day rewatching both seasons and working on a new chapter.

Until next time ♥️

[reikunrei]

feeling incredibly averse to posting this but i'm just gonna drop my kofi link here in case anyone wants to help me get out of my increasingly shitty situation living with my parents

more info below ig

after having given my parents nearly $100k over the last four years, i'd love to be able to actually leave. my future job situation is still up in the air (i've submitted for about a dozen positions and the only one i've heard back from and interviewed for hasn't gotten back to me yet), and i haven't been able to build up any savings because, again, i was (and still am) helping my family afford rent and bills, and probably the taxes my parents are behind on, but if i think about that, i'll get too angry. no joke, i've given my family, at the bare minimum, 85% of my income over the last 4 years. the rest of it has gone toward medical stuff and, now, my car

at this point, with the combo of my mom refusing to lower her standards and my dad's seeming refusal to hunt for a new full time job, i don't see how they won't continue to bleed me dry. my dad even has a bad habit of taking money out of my old savings account that he's a joint owner on or whatever from when i got it set up when i was 16, even when i stopped actively putting money in it, so now any time it gets its automated $1 transfer from my checking account, he'll just take that $1 without consulting me. i'm not exaggerating, even if it has $1-2 in it, it'll be gone within a week

i've even put off starting on testosterone because of this. i wanted to start it like 3 years ago, but kept putting it off because of money issues and wanting to save as much as possible. i got really close to actually starting it this year, but because of how messy everything is, i put it off again bc having one more thing on my plate, especially when my parents are already weird about me being trans, was not something i wanted to deal with

not to mention, we're still currently not living under a lease in our house that we're, as far as i'm aware, still tens of thousands of dollars behind in rent on (again, my dad refuses to disclose our financial position honestly with any of us) and it's developed many, many issues bc the landlord, even before we were behind on rent, is shit and refuses to actually fix anything. and my dad loves to just ignore things unless we beg him to do something

i'd love to be on my own (in the, much more affordable, midwest) by the end of summer. i by no means want to rely on donations and i have other avenues i'm working with to make money (i still have my current full time job, but i'm going through my old belongings and selling a lot online), but i'll take any help i can get atp because i'm truly at my wits end. i'd start doing art commissions again if i could, but doing that from 2020-2022, partially on top of my full time job, absolutely wrecked my right hand and i'm still in enough pain that i can't make it a regular activity

idk how much else there is to say. there's more i could say but... i don't really wanna air all my dirty laundry here. i'm miserable in so many ways and it's just become increasingly clear that my dad expects me to constantly cover his ass. my younger brother gives money too, but he manages to go on big cross-country and overseas trips with friends, so i think i've been stuck with the burden of giving the most money. there's so many more things going on in the world rn and everyone is stretched thin so i don't expect much, or anything, but. idk. might as well throw it out there, right?

i’ve also since taken down the gfm i set up last year when we got our first eviction notice bc, while we still need the money, i don’t feel right keeping it up for multiple reasons, including “i don’t want to give any of that money to my family” and it feels too… serious to keep it up when i could just throw out my kofi instead

i just want to make sure i have some sort of safety net to catch me if i move before anything job-wise is finalized. i need to be able to afford a place to live for at least a month so i can job-search while physically being in the area i wanna move to, which would ultimately make it easier for me to find a job at all. i'm working on being more firm with giving less money so i can actually have the means to move and be safe and comfortable, but... that never lasts long in this house

anyway. that's it, i guess. thanks for reading

[nightmaretour]

I hate to do this, and it's a long shot I know, but things are getting desperate and it seems like I'm going to be waiting WAY longer than I should be for something that's fairly urgent.

I'm a disabled trans man living in the UK. Recently I was found to have severe anemia, and came up with my FIT test (gastrointestinal cancer screening) a few months ago, and was referred for a colonoscopy to find out the cause, since it looks like I'm having a slow but constant bleed through my GI tract. However, my referral has been awaiting review for over three months now. I'm not even on the waiting list, I'm waiting for someone to decide if I need to be on the waiting list. Since then I've started having GI symptoms such as pain, intermittent loss of appetite, etc. as well as my anemia worsening significantly.

This is of course pretty urgent, but it looks like I'll be waiting months longer once I finally get on the waiting list too. I really have no choice but to get it done through a private hospital, because of the time sensitive nature of, you know, potentially having cancer. I managed to put some money away out of the backpay I got from PIP, but it's not enough.

[ID: A screenshot of an email that's says:

Dear Mr (name blocked out in red),

Thank you for your website inquiry. For your information, the cost of an initial consultation with one of our consultant gastroenterologists is £280."

It then lists the names of 3 doctors as links, all blocked out in red. The email continues,

"The guide price for a colonoscopy is £2,339. For further information, including appointment availability, please don't hesitate to contact the medical secretaries (followed by three names redacted in red) directly on (phone number redacted in red) or call the private patient team on (phone number redacted in red). End ID]

Currently I have around £1,400 stashed away from PIP backpay I got after they royally fucked things up (however I may need to dip into this at points if I find myself struggling). Together the consultation plus the colonoscopy will cost £2,619, which leaves me about £1220 behind. I know I'm most likely not going to get that much from this, but I honestly have no choice but to try my luck here. I really don't know what else I can do.

I really don't like asking for money from people for nothing, but I have a Ko-fi store where I sell handmade screen printed patches, and I'll be adding more designs to it over the coming weeks when I have the time and energy to make new screens. I'm also offering commissions for custom band patches! (Due to Kofi's TOS I can't officially offer patches for bands without their permission.). Below are a few examples of my work:

[ID: 5 images of patches printed in white on black fabric, all sewn onto a worn looking black denim jacket. All are sewn on roughly in red floss, aside from the last one. The first says "only dates I want are tour dates". The words "dates" and "tour dates" are larger than the other text. All of the letter As are replaced with spade symbols. The second is the logo of the band Cop/Out, which is the band name with rough, jagged edges. The third is the logo for The Prodigy, which is the band name in sharp. Zig-zagging letters. The fourth is the logo for the band Subhumans, a stylised skull shouting into a microphone. The fourth is the horizontal silhouette of a crutch. With the words "Talk shit" above it and "get hit" below it. Unlike the rest it is sewn on in black, and the edge of an embroidered back patch is visible just above it. End ID]

I know a lot of people aren't doing well financially right now, and that there are people in far, far more dire situations who probably need your help far more than I do, but I would appreciate any purchases of patches or help you can offer so, so much. Even just sharing the post would be enormously appreciated.

Current progress:

£115/£1220

And of course as pet tax, here's Cynder :)

[ID: A photo of a female wild type leopard gecko laying spread out on a smooth rounded rock in a glass fronted tank. Her head is sideways and raised, looking at the camera with one eye. She looks relaxed and curious. Behind her a large piece of thick tree bark and a plastic cave can be seen. End ID]

[whiteraven90]

hello, I hope you're having a good day <33 I saw your recent post on my dash and I was STUNNED at the animated scene! It's insane to me I get to see your characters animated. Feeling blessed to be alive to see it, I am not exaggerating. You know, one of these times where you wake up and things are a little bumpy in your life but there's one thing that shines brightly you didn't know it could give you so much excitement? Yeah, that kind of thing ((:

I took my time for the past hour to reminisce over your blog again. It is one of the places I really love scrolling through and reading your writing. I had a question, if you don't mind me. The way you have improved is truly admirable. I know this might not be an easy ask to say "hey, how did you learn how to paint", so I'll ask this instead: I don't know how long you've been working full-time in art, but when do you make time for studies / drawing for fun? If it's not too much to respond to, how do *you* study? I remembered your posts with your redlines and wanted to ask how do you go about those, or if you switch your routines based on your needs (sketches vs speed painting backgrounds etc). The notes there were very interesting, seeing the mental exercise.

Pretty sure you have a fKTON of stuff on your plate, so please don't feel obligated to respond quickly or even at all. Thank you in advance for taking the time to read my message and for all the time you take to respond in general. Love reading your responses <3

Take care, ok? <3

I'm glad the animation made you feel better! I'll put the answer under the Keep Reading thingy.

I'm not entirely sure... I think I don't study as much as I should/could. I mostly learn as I go. Standalone studies are helpful, I'm just drawn to doing things that are more fun/satisfying to me or things that actively progress my creative goals. Imperfect illustrations for my stories, and incomplete research for worldbuilding! Many people learn faster than I, and those people do a lot more studies than I, but I have no info on whether they have more fun than I. Dopamine is rocket fuel, so it's important. :)

I'm always on the lookout for reference pictures, but I study almost only when I have a practical goal in mind, I guess. Studying is part of my job too, I think? As an indie concept artist I'm supposed to build a hoard of references and pull several new/sensible things out of them, and I think part of this process is understanding the material, and revisiting even what I already know. Illustration is similar. If I'm commissioned to draw an anthro alligator, it's time to study gators. It's not separate from work.

I mean, straightforward version: I wake up at 03:30, make coffee, and start working for myself until the paying work starts, lol. Brain is fresh before noon, and tired late in the evening just like everyone else's. It also helps that the city more or less shuts up at 4am.

The studies with the redlines... I do them when I fancy drawing characters or creatures but feel out of shape. I can get discouraged, feel like I forgot how to draw. I sketch if I plan to sketch, and paint if I plan to paint or want to study colors Drawing live models helps. Studying videos of people and things in motion. Hopping down rabbit holes about how/why things work (e.g. flintlock, Davy lamp, mansard roof). Drawing from refs. Hoarding refs. Trying different mediums (e.g. charcoal, 3D, etching). Small screenshot of one of my ref boards for the animation; I'd say I studied it a lot. How clothes move, what are good clothes, how do good clothes move, lion/tiger + human + eagle anatomy (from specific angles during specific motions if/when possible), how to dive roll, proper sprinting form, how to survive falling from a great height, spearfighting, pole vaulting, poledancing, lighting, colors, environment, kicked-up sand in motion, spear types, emu/cassowary/griffon vulture feet, etc. I didn't draw studies, unless you count the animation itself (I would).

[cozage]

Welcome to My Blog!

Hi, I’m Cozage! You can call me Coza. I’m 25, she/they pronouns are preferred, but any are fine. Right now I’m just writing for One Piece, but I’m open to writing for just about anyone within that realm. Please read this whole post before sending a message!

Requests: CLOSED

Pending requests: 30🤭

Masterlist Part 1 | Masterlist Pt 2

Are your requests open?

Not at the moment! Please do not send me a request when my requests are closed. I ALWAYS delete them, just to be fair. You are always welcome to send me questions and feedback on my writing or ideas for future chapters for my multifics, but please no new requests. Just because I am fulfilling requests, does not mean my requests are open! 

Can I request a part 2 even when your requests are closed?

This is where it gets dicey. The simple answer is: no. HOWEVER, you can pop into my inbox and let me know that you really liked a specific story and ask if I'm going to have a part two (respectfully!) and you might convince me. Almost all of my multi-parters have come from requests, and I'm always looking for new multi-chapter fics to write :)

When do you open for requests?

I close my requests when my inbox reaches 20, and then I reopen it again when I get it back down to 5. You can check the status of my requests at the top of this post. Events have separate rules and guidelines, which are always explained in the post. If I have an event going on, it'll be tagged in the announcement section at the top of this post!

What should I include in my request?

Reader gender (if you dont specify I'll just do non-gendered), characters you want (try to limit it to 3 or 4, or else I might pick and choose from the list and omit some characters), the scenario you want, you can also clarify if you want a headcanon list or a short fic!

Edit to add: Just a friendly reminder, the more characters you add to a request, the more overwhelming it is for me (and more likely it is to get deleted! 3 characters really is the sweet spot!)

What requests do you accept?

Just about anything. I do occasionally post NSFW, but it’s always tagged and marked. I have a few hard no’s, though:

Relationship situations for minors/large age gaps, pedophilia, grooming, incest, noncon (that’s not a cohesive list, but you get the gist).

Do you write for polys?

Maybe! Polys are hard for me to write. I struggle making the relationship balance equal and keeping people in character while also doing justice to a well-written relationship w/o being too corny. But! If you send it in, I'll at least give it a shot :)

Who can I request?

Just about anyone from One Piece, and I'll do my best given the scenario. Some people I will definitely always write for and take almost any request you send are:

Luffy, Zoro, Sanji, Ace, Law, Kidd, Shanks, and Buggy

Everyone else is hit or miss on if I can imagine their scenarios, but I'll do my best. Some people who I really struggle writing are: Crocodile, Doffy, Izou (And I will not write for Gol Roger ever because I hate him 💕)

How detailed should my request be?

Try to keep it a healthy medium! If there are important aspects you want to be included in your story, let me know :) But try to avoid giving me a play-by-play. That level of detail makes me feel trapped and it's hard to take a creative spin on it. If you have a story you are imagining in your head and you want someone to write it...well, have you considered being a writer? :)

I have more than one request...

Try to limit your requests to 1 or 2, please! We want room for other people to have their ideas to come to light. If you have two ideas, you need to submit two separate messages. Please do not put two story ideas together in a request, or I will just write one :)

Do you take commissions? How can I support you?

I don't take commissions yet, and I'm struggling with doing that, so we will see. When they do appear, they'll appear on my Ko-fi account (where you can also support me through donations if you so feel inclined!)

What tags do you use (for blacklisting or other purposes)?

Most of my blog is writing, but here's how I tag certain things in case you want to blacklist or follow them:

"cozage" - any type of writing for One Piece I do will have this (just to show it's my work)

"coza thoughts" - May be my daily thoughts/info about writing. No substance though, just me.

"coza asks" - messages that I get that aren't requests. Usually just me responding to people

all the pairings also get tagged as well, so if you were to search "Zoro" hashtag on my page, any fics with him would come up

Do you have an AO3?

Yes! Same name as here. I put a lot of my short multi-chapter fics there (but Tumblr gets all the updates first) BUT here’s a link to it. 

Is there anything else I should know?

Please just remember that when you send me a request or a message, I may not always respond to it. I do always read them, though! I just don't always respond because I don't want to clog up my page with posts that aren't content. Don’t get me wrong, I love hearing everyone’s ideas and working together with you all to bring these ideas to life. Send the ask, let me know what you think and how you feel and all of your ideas, but remember that I’m human too! I have feelings and friends and a life outside of writing for our favorite One Piece characters. I look forward to reading your thoughts, and sharing mine with you. 

Love, Coza <3

[jpmarvel90]

Coming Home

Masterlist Scarlett Masterlist

Relationship: Natasha x ex-Reader

Summary: Friends most of thier lives and in a relationship from 17 years old, Y/n and Scarlett's relationship deteriorated when Scarlett started her acting career. In contrast Y/n joined the military and has a surprise encounter after many years when she returns from duty.

Word Count: 3881

Y/n's POV:

I have known Scarlett Johansson most of my life. We grew up together and our parents are really close friends. We were best friends for most of our childhood and then we started dating when we were 17. For 3 years we were together, and we had a great relationship. We may have been young, but our love was strong. I adored her and I truly believe that she did in return.

When we turned 20, she started being away more for filming, and because our relationship wasn't public, I wasn't able to travel with her or spend as much time as I'd hoped. Over time, the contact was getting less and less. We used to call everyday regardless of where she was and be texting through the day. But as the months went on, she called less and eventually just stopped messaging me all together.

What was worse was still seeing her family regularly. I loved her parents, especially her mom and I struggled to still spend time with them when I had been completely ghosted by their daughter. So, to protect my already broken heart, I started to distance myself from them. I was in college in New York and just focused on getting to graduation.

Much to my Mom's dismay, when I graduated college, I joined the Army. I commissioned as an Officer and was posted out to Fort Benning in Georgia. I was due to be posted to Afghanistan so my parents decided to throw a huge party to send me off. I was surprised when the Johanssons appeared at the door, but I was grateful to see them before I left.

I needed to take a breather and stood outside in our garden to collect my thoughts of how I ended up here. I hadn't ever really been far from my family. I had stay in New York for College. It was weird at first when I went to Georgia a year ago. Now I was heading to Afghanistan on my first deployment, and I was leading my unit. As I was lost in thought, I felt a hand placed on my shoulder. "You look so grown up in your uniform." I turned around and saw Melanie, Scarlett's mom. "I still remember you running around our back garden playing soldiers with Scarlett as 8 year olds. I never thought you'd actually end up going to fight." She said with a sad look on her face.

I took her hand and pulled her into a hug. "I'm sorry I stopped coming to see you. It was just hard." I apologised. "We understood Y/n. I'm sorry that my daughter didn't have the courage to talk to you and not just block you out of her life." She said sincerely. "I've always considered you like a daughter Y/n. I hope you can keep in contact whilst you're away." She said and I instantly felt my guilt grow for shutting them out of my life just because of what Scarlett had done.

"I'll write as often as I can and when I come home to visit, I'll be sure to come by. You and Karsten are family to me." We pulled away from our hug and she gave me a teary smile. "How about a photo before you leave?" She asked and I happily obliged. We went and sought out Karsten and my parents and took a few photos. As I was leaving this evening I was already in my uniform.

Once the party was over, I had a teary goodbye with my parents and made my way to the station for my train to Georgia ready for my flight in the morning. As I put my bag on my back, I turned and saw my dad holding my mom in the doorway as they watched me leave. I turned around and gave them a wave as I turned the corner out of sight. Their words still ringing in my ears. "Please come back to us."

_____________

It had been 4 years since I left, and I had barely been home. I had done one tour of Iraq and was in the middle of my second tour of Afghanistan. I wrote as often as I could as making calls was difficult from the patrol bases, I was stationed at. I had kept my promise and was in regular contact with Melanie. The couple of times I had managed to get home, I always would drop by and see them.

As much as I had tried to avoid any news on Scarlett, I would still see things in the press or online. She was just going through a divorce with Ryan Reynolds and that did nothing for my confidence. No wonder she wanted to stop any contact with me when she had guys like him around. Luckily, I only saw things like this when I was back in the US. Thankfully gossip news wasn't exactly a priority in Afghanistan so it was pretty easy to avoid it whilst I was there.

I was currently sat on the train on my way back home for R&R leave and I was nervous as I hadn't been home in nearly 2 years. I was planning on spending my week off with my parents before I had to fly back out. My parents didn't know that I was coming home so I was excited to surprise them, although I knew that I was going to have to explain the cuts and bruises from an incident I was involved in.

After the long train journey, I jumped in a taxi to head home. My leg was bouncing with nerves at the thought of seeing my parents again. I had really missed them and wished that I had made the effort to come home more often. As the taxi pulled up outside my house, I paid up and found myself just standing on the front step. I could hear music and laughing inside and there was a part of me that didn't want to interrupt. But I took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

The door swung open, and my Dad was stood there. It took a moment for him to register that it was me before he silently just pulled me into the biggest hug he has ever given me. I could hear small sniffles and as he pulled away, I noticed a few tears had fallen down his cheeks. "I can't believe you're home!" He said through the tears. "Who is it Henry?" I heard my mom call from the dining room. "I think you should come and see for yourself Mary." He replied, never taking his eyes off of me.

I heard her gasp and let out a small scream as she saw me stood in the doorway. "OH MY GOD! My baby!" she ran toward me and launched herself at me, almost knocking me over. "Hi Mom. I missed you." I said into the hug. My dad joined the hug and we stayed like that for what felt like hours. When our hug was done my mom cupped my face and I could see her examining the couple of cuts I had on my face. "You're hurt. What happened?" She stated. I placed my hands on hers and shook my head. "I'm fine. I'll tell you about it another time." I replied, not wanting to get into that story now.

Our little family reunion was interrupted by a voice from behind us. "Little Y/n has really grown up." Karsten said walking forward to give me a quick hug. "I am 27 now." I laughed in response. "Good to see you still look good in your uniform." Melanie added as she now appeared. I couldn't help the wide grin on my face when I saw her. I instinctively opened my arms and we hugged. "I'm glad you're home safe." She whispered.

I nodded and looked around at 4 of the most important people in my life. But I felt my heart completely drop when I heard another shuffle come from the dining room. I looked over and saw a face I hadn't seen in over 5 years. Scarlett. I could feel the air get thicker as our parents all dropped their eye contact. Ignoring her presence, I turned to my mom. "I should have called. I didn't realise you had company. I need a shower, so I'll leave you guys to it." I said, grabbing my bag and making my way towards the stairs.

I was stopped by my mom grabbing my wrist. "Y/n, you are never interrupting us. Please join us for some food." I couldn't stay down here. I know it's been years since I last saw her and I should have moved on already, but seeing her stood there again, I couldn't do it. "I really need a shower mom. I've got sand in places I never wanted sand." I joked and carried on up the stairs to my room. Well, this wasn't how I expected my leave to go.

Scarlett's POV:

(1 year ago)

I was visiting my parents in New York whilst I had a break from filming. Things with Ryan and I weren't going well, and I needed some time away to clear my head and work out what I wanted. I had some work to get done today, so I was in my mom's office and a photo on her desk caught my eye.

It took me a moment to realise who it was. Y/n. She was in an Army uniform and was with both my parents. When was this even taken? I hadn't seen Y/n since I left to film in LA. I hated to admit it, but I had treated her awfully. I was so scared of coming out, that I decided I couldn't be with her anymore. But instead of doing the right thing and talking to her. I was a coward and slowly started to ignore her until she finally stopped messaging me.

I hated doing it as I loved her more than anything. I threw myself into work so I could ignore my feelings and try to get over the love of my life. Eventually I met Ryan and I thought I had managed to succeed in forgetting about Y/n. And I had for a while, but there would be small things in our relationship that would annoy me and I'd find myself thinking that Y/n wouldn't do that. But when I had these thoughts, I would just supress them, I couldn't think of her like that anymore.

I grabbed the photo frame and walked downstairs to my mom who was cooking in the kitchen. "When was this taken?" I asked, placing the photo on the kitchen counter. My mom looked down at the photo and back to me sighing. "3 years ago, the day she left for her first deployment." She answered. "Why didn't you tell me she joined the army." I asked, slightly frustrated. "It was your decision to cut her out of your life. Like I told you every time you would ask about her. If you wanted to know about her, you should have contacted her." She replied harshly.

She was right. At the beginning I was always asking how she was and what she was up to. But every time my mom would shut me down and would tell me that if I cared enough to know about her, I should contact her myself. I never had the courage to do that. "Where is she now?" I asked. Mom put down the knife she had in her hands and gave her full attention to me. "Georgia. She's getting ready to deploy to Afghanistan again." I let her words sink in as she spoke.

I felt a knot in my stomach at the thought of her being in a war zone. "We're all very proud of her. She's the first woman to lead a combat infantry unit. She's done amazingly well in her career." My mom explains with a smile on her face. "Do you keep in contact with her?" I question. She nodded. "She writes as often as she can."

"Does she um. Did she ever ask about me?" I tentatively inquired. Mom dropped her eye contact and instantly knew her answer. "No. I think it hurt her too much. She changed after you left. She put up this wall. You really hurt her Scar." She said. I knew I had hurt her, and I really regretted it. But I knew I wouldn't ever be able to make it up to her. I'd never earn her forgiveness.

_____________

(Night Y/n returns)

We were all having a nice meal with the Y/l/ns. I had recently moved back to New York after my divorce. I was spending a lot of time with my parents as I needed their support. I also started to see more of Henry and Mary so I could feel closer to Y/n. I still hadn't reached out to her. I wanted to more than anything, but I had no idea how I would even start.

We had just started to eat when there was a knock at the door. Henry got up to answer it. We couldn't hear much, just mumbling. Mary then got up to check who it was. My parents and I all had a worried look when we heard a small scream from Mary followed by "Oh my god!". We quickly got up and my parents were first to leave the dining room. As soon as I looked through the doorway, I saw her. She was being smothered by a hug from her parents, but I could tell clear as day that it was her.

I quietly watched as my mom and dad greeted her and it was great to see that they still had a good relationship with her. We grew up together and we were like extended family to each other, and I know how much my parents loved Y/n. I smiled to myself at their interaction and that fate had brought us back together tonight.

After they had all had their reunion, I started to walk into the hallway to join them when Y/n's eyes snapped to mine. I could see the happiness in her eyes disappear and be replaced with hurt. I couldn't get any words out and before I knew it she was walking away. My brain was yelling at me to call after her, but I just stood there watching as she walked up the stairs.

"I should go. I don't want to stop you spending time with Y/n." I said, feeling my heart shatter at the thought that she can't even be in the same room as me. Mary reached over to take my hand and shook her head. "Don't be silly. You're staying. She's just shocked to see you." I still wasn't sure but her dad gave me a reassuring smile so I turned back towards the dining room.

I couldn't take my eyes off the doorway, all I wanted was for her to join us, but I knew she wouldn't. Maybe I should go and see her. Seeing her again made me realise that I'm still in love with her. I'm the one that needs to apologise, I need to make the first move. "Why don't you go up sweetheart?" I heard Mary say. I looked up and was giving me a sympathetic smile.

I stood up and took a deep breath and made my way to her bedroom. The door was slightly opened and as I knocked it opened further to reveal Y/n. She had just taken her shirt off and was stood in a sports bra. Her torso was covered in dark bruising. With no control over my body, I had rushed over to her and placed my hands on her back. "Oh my god Y/n. What happened?" I asked full of concern. She quickly pulled away from me and her face was full of anger.

"What do you want Scarlett?" She asked harshly, ignoring my question. "I uh, I want to talk." I stuttered, still not able to take my eyes away from her injuries. She laughed and pulled away from me. She was still shirtless, and I found my eyes admiring her body. She was in incredible shape. The Army was doing great for her. "Talk? Well so did I, 5 years ago." She said and the anger in her voice made my heart clench. "Please I just want to apologise. How I acted was cowardly and I should have come home to talk to you. I was scared." I tried to explain but she just scoffed.

I watched as she ran her hands through her hair, starting to pace. "Why now? We're both completely different people now. What benefit is there to either of us to have this conversation." Her words were cutting and there was a part of me that was terrified that I would never be able to fix this. "Because I still lov..." "Don't you dare finish that sentence." She spun around on the spot interrupting me with a look of anger. "I loved you with all I had. I gave you everything and put you first time and time again. Yet I clearly meant nothing to you as you could so easily just forget about me." She said, tears starting to fall.

"But I did love you. I still do! It was the biggest mistake I've ever made. I never forgot about you. I tried but I couldn't." I tried to explain but I could tell she wasn't having any of it. "Tell me this Scarlett. If I hadn't seen you tonight, would you have contacted me?" She has stopped pacing now and had stopped right in front of me, her hands on her hips. Words weren't coming out of my mouth and I was cursing at myself for it. "That's what I thought." She said grabbing her towel and shutting herself in the bathroom.

I felt tears falling down my cheeks, my heart breaking. I didn't have the right to feel like this. I was the one that broke her heart. I made my way back downstairs and rejoined our parents. They all gave me a sympathetic look. "Give her time. She never stopped loving you. She's just hurt and protecting herself." Her dad offered which surprised me. I hurt their daughter. I would have thought they wouldn't want me anywhere near her. I gave him a small smile of gratitude and we carried on the dinner.

Over the last week I had tried to see Y/n as often as I could but each time, she would push me away. I knew that if I wanted to mend what I broke, I had to show her what she meant to me. I was making my way over to her parents' house, but my heart sank when I saw Y/n in the doorway in uniform and her bag in hand. Her mom was crying, and her dad had her in a tight embrace.

I ran up their footpath wanting to know where she was going. "Are you leaving?" I asked and she turned around and I could see that she had been crying. "Yeah, my leave is over. I've got to head back." She said and it was the first time she's spoken to me willingly. "To Afghanistan?" I ask and she nods. Not giving her time to react, I pull her into a hug and try to hide the fact that I was crying. "Stay safe." Was all that I could get out and I was shocked when she returned the hug.

Once I released her, she grabbed her bag and turned to give her parents one last hug. "I'll see you in 3 months." She said and started to make her way down the path. The three of us watched her leave and I felt a hand on my shoulder. "She'll come home." Henry said, but I think he was trying to convince himself as much as me.

It had been 2 months since Y/n had gone. I had been writing to her three or four times a week, after getting the address from my mom. I had a couple of short replies from her, which was more than I had expected. Maybe she was starting to warm up to me more. I couldn't wait for her to come home as I had a whole plan to win her back. I knew Y/n better than most people. Yes it may be 5 years and she's changed but I know there are some things that will never change. So, I was going to use all of that knowledge to win her back over.

I was working on some emails when I heard a knock at the door. I got up and was greeted by my mom at the door, but I quickly noticed that her eyes were red and puffy. "Mom, what's wrong? Is dad ok?" I asked panicked as I guided her into the living room. She shook her head and took a deep breath. "It's Y/n." She whispered and, in that moment, I felt my heart tear in two. "I just had a call from Henry. Y/n's unit came under attack, she got hurt and they couldn't get to her. They had to retreat without her. She's been declared missing in action, presumed dead." Her words were like knives to my already wounded heart.

I dropped to my knees and let out a cry. My mom knelt next to me and pulled me into a hug. We both cried together. "But they haven't found a body, so she could still be alive." I said trying to grasp on to any hope. "Sweetheart, her injuries were severe. They said the likelihood of her surviving was extremely small." My mom sobbed.  I can't believe, the woman that I love is dead. I never should have left her all those years ago. Maybe she wouldn't have joined the army if we were still together. She'd still be alive, and we'd be together like we were meant to me.

As my sobbing got louder, my mom held me closer. "It's ok sweetheart. We'll get through this together." She said through her own tears. "It won't be ok. I've lost her forever. It's all my fault! I was such a selfish asshole and it's cost me the love of my life." My mom and I held each other, mourning the loss of someone so important in both of our lives.

She died a hero, saving the lives of her men by ordering the retreat whilst she was injured knowing she wouldn't make it. I wouldn't have expected anything less from her. She always put other people first. In this instant it cost her her life. I should have put her first like she had always done to me. I should have never let a day go by where she didn't know how much I loved her. But instead, I'm sat here mourning the loss of the one person I can't live my life without. I was just too late to realise it.

Part 2

[satancopilotsmytardis]

Welcome to the Drabble-A-Thon!

What is it?

From September 6th to September 15th, I will be offering 1,000-word drabble commissions for $5 through Ko-Fi!

Why is this a thing?

My job pushed back my start date by a month and a half, and I've noticed that my 3-year-old phone's screen is starting to burn out (my last phone lasted 5 years and I am incredibly salty about this). I want to take the week I'm off to try and get some outside work to start saving up to replace it and stay ahead on bills despite the delay. 

How does it work?

If you make a donation of $5 on Ko-Fi, and give a 1-2 sentence description of your drabble idea in the donation note, I will write a 1,000 word* story! The story will be posted publicly on Ko-Fi, and cross-posted to Tumblr as well**. These will be done on a first-come first-serve basis, and I will keep a post on Ko-Fi and Tumblr updated on what number submission I am on. Because I don't know how many prompts will be given, I can't give a firm estimate on when the pieces will be delivered, so the queue will be the best way to see when your request is being worked on! 

*The finished drabble will be a minimum of 1,000 words, if I go over by a bit, that is on me, and just a fun bonus for you! 

**Ko-fi has strict guidelines for NSFW material, and anything rated "Explicit" will only be able to be posted to Tumblr. If you would like a PDF copy as well, please provide an email address to send it to in your message!

Are there any rules I should know about?

First and foremost, please make sure that you read my general commission guide which can be found here. Keep in mind I do not write Sub!/Bottom!Tomura or Dom!/Top!Dabi. If you have a question about your concept that is not answered by the guidelines, please feel free to DM me on Tumblr before donating! 

In addition, please note that 1k isn't a lot of words, so try to keep concepts simple enough to be executed within that amount of story! 

These drabbles also cannot be add-ons to other existing stories. For example, no drabble prompt can be for a story set after the end of Changing Currents, or an exploration of Dabi's time on the streets before Tomura adopted him in A Cat by Any Other Name. These are for stand-alone pieces in order to keep things simple and not conflict with the canon of my existing works! 

Can I donate more than $5 to get a longer story?

No. This is a drabble-a-thon! While you are welcome to donate however much you would like, every $5 only gets one 1k word story. If you would like to donate $10, then you are welcome to put two drabble prompts in your donation note which will then both enter the queue and be posted! Every multiple of 5 is eligible for a new prompt! 

If you would still like a longer story from me, then you can always DM me about setting up a full commission! 

I want to participate, but I want to remain anonymous/I want to be tagged by a name other than the name used for the donation.

No problem! If you want to remain anonymous, simply put your name as "Anonymous" in for your name/nickname, and you can then type your prompt in the message box. You can send this message privately, and only I should be able to read your prompt! 

If you want to be tagged by your Tumblr username, then you can also add that in your message and I will tag you appropriately when your prompt is posted! 

I want to participate but I don't have any idea what to ask for!

Coming up with story prompts can be hard! You can send in 1-2 sentences of your idea, or you can simply send in a kind of AU, a rating, or a kink (or a few of them 👀), and let me take it from there! If you really, really can't think of anything at all, then just send in "Free Style", and I'll come up with something to fill the drabble! This is meant to be fun, please don't feel any pressure!

I want to participate, but I don't have any money!

That's absolutely okay! Please do not feel any pressure to participate! Money is tight for a lot of people right now and your needs, safety, and comfort come first! 

My question wasn't answered here! 

Please feel free to DM me or send an ask on Tumblr! I'll do my best to answer! 

Thank you so much to anyone who chooses to participate! I can't wait to see what stories we're able to bring to life!